All language subtitles for 1 1 Real.Time.with.Bill.Maher.S24E17.480p

Start the clock.

I know, I know, I know.

Thank you.

I love you, too.

You specifically.

Okay. Okay, I know. I know why L .A. is
excited today, because the World Cup is

coming here next week. Oh, my God.

This is soccer, right?

No, I don't know anything about soccer.

Everybody's so excited. All I know about
this is that it's soccer, and a lot of

countries come, and it takes a long
time, apparently, to play these games.

days, we will know the winner. Oh, no,
that's the mayor of L .A. I'm sorry.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, it's California.

What a fucked -up state this is.

But apparently the two finalists are
going to be Karen Bass, the mayor, and

Spencer Pratt, the reality star.

Oh, look at that.

So they are going to be in a runoff. I
gave the edge to Karen Bass because who

knows more about running off?

Oh, we did.

And Spencer, oh boy, I had him on my
podcast.

It's like a Jason Statham movie with
this guy. It's like, you burned down my

house, now I'm coming for you.

And he's very, oh, quality of life
issues, very concerned about the

who he always calls naked homeless drug
addicts.

And they don't like that term. They
prefer former child actors.

We also had the primary for governor
here, the leading candidate, Xavier

Becerra.

That is the exact kind of enthusiasm
that he...

No, he won because he's the closest name
on the ballot to fuck ice.

Also, you know who was on the ballot?
Eric Swalwell was still on the ballot

got 19 ,000 votes.

Who are these people? People who opened
a dick pic and liked it?

Oh.

Yeah.

Democrats. They have another sex creep
problem.

Have you seen this guy, Graham Plattner,
up in Maine?

They're big hope to take the Senate, the
Democrats.

But Graham Platner, he's a lot.

You know, he's got a Nazi tattoo. We
don't know about that. Maybe it was just

drunk. He didn't know it was whatever.

But a lot of stuff. Now stuff about, you
know, he definitely was texting other

women outside of his marriage. Now some
of the girlfriends are coming forward.

One of them says he used to watch TV
while he was sharpening his axe.

Could cost him.

women and their vote, but he did win
over Stephen King.

You know, it's Maine. It's a small
state. You gotta...

Apparently, Graham Platner, one of the
girlfriends said one

of his fantasies was how heroic he would
be if there was a home invader.

Problem is how he wanted to be heroic
with the home invader, which was by

him.

I'm just reporting people.

But not in a gay way. He emphasized
that. Not in a gay way.

Just in a regular, this is what happens
to a guy who busts into my house way.

Well,

you know, that's politics, okay? I mean,
say what you want.

It's not soft on crime.

I would say, doesn't anybody want to win
a race?

Both parties. I mean, you know, this
week, Jill Biden, have you seen that?

She needs to have a book out, Jill
Biden.

She went on, said she thought Joe was
having a stroke during the debate.

Didn't mention it at the time.

Went on The View and admitted she
thought, no, Joe couldn't have served

term. They said, really? She said, no,
not from what I know now. Who knew?

Yes. Other than everyone, no one.

Doesn't anyone want to win?

I mean, the other side, Trump keeps
pitching off people so badly, even the

Republicans are standing up to him now.

They figure, hey, it worked for the
Iranians.

Well, you know... I can always tell

when the president is in a bad mood
because he starts tweeting about me.

Look, I feel it's an honor always to be
in his tweets, even when they're bad,

and they're always bad.

This week he said I was low -ratings
Bill Maher with his fake laughing

First of all, low ratings. Yours is 35%.
And...

Fake? Fake laughing machine? Can we get
a shot of our audience?

I know he's in a foul mood. Did you see
the phone call he had with Prime

Minister Netanyahu of Israel? Wow. The
language. He didn't even deny it. He

to Netanyahu, you're fucking crazy.

You'd be in prison if it wasn't for you.
I'm saving your ass and everybody hates

you.

And your laughing machine is fake.

He said all that. But, hey.

Hey, it's... Let's not forget, it is the
beginning of Pride Month, or as...

As Lindsey Graham calls it, why is
everybody looking at me, Mom?

But, you know, look, I've got to say,
usually Pride Month is just fun, but

is news this year. This is serious.
There is disturbing polling that the

acceptance of gay people in this country
on all levels is regressing among

Republicans. One of their
congresspeople, Andy Ogles, How's that

name?

Said homosexuality has no place in
America. Then he took down the tweet and

blamed it on a staffer. Like real men
do.

But this is a serious thing that is
going on.

Acceptance of same -sex marriage is way
down among Republicans.

Oh, they still want the gay sex part,
just not the marriage part.

All right, we've got a great show.

Ambassador Susan Rice and Senator Chris
Murphy are here. But first up, okay, he

was the 48th Vice President of the
United States. His new book is called

Conservatives Believe, Rediscovering the
Conservative Conscious. How about it

for Vice President Mike Pence?

Look at that.

Mike, look at that. You've got a nice
applause and a standing ovation here

the left -wing lunatics.

We have the nicest crowd in all of
television. Thank you very much. Yeah,

because they're willing to listen to
anybody, and so am I. And I'm sure lots

people said to you, why are you going on
that crazy atheist show? More than a

few. More than a few. But that's why I
so appreciate you being here. I'm glad

be here. I'm glad you're here because I
think, you know, we can say to each

other we don't agree on a lot of stuff.

But I know there are ways.

You've said to my staff, Israel and
stuff, you think I'm not all bad.

Anybody who did what you did on January
6th can't be all bad.

And I

think we have a lot in common. Like we
both know, it's kind of hard to stay

friends with Donald Trump.

Are you ever in contact with him these
days?

Well, you know, it's been a while since
we spoke. You never just call him?

You've actually spent more time with him
recently than I have.

But, no, I love how you started the
show, and I really want to commend you

the way you carry yourself. I really see
you as an honest broker.

I try to be. Speak your mind.

It's hard.

I try to. I really do.

I've always said, you know, I'm a
conservative, but I'm not in a bad mood

it. And you've always struck me as a
liberal that's not in a bad mood either.

No, no, no. I want to talk to everybody.
My little line is, everybody's a

monster until you talk to them.

Just talk to them a little bit. I really
do believe it's a key to our country

right now. In fact, I don't know if I
mentioned that I just wrote a book. I'm

just about to bring it up.

Just about to bring it up.

In the book, I actually, I really
believe that democracy depends on heavy

of civility.

And I think the American people long for
us to restore a threshold of civility.

And I write about it.

No, I mean, the book, the book. And your
column today in the Washington Post,

the theme is that we are at a crossroads
in America. I mean, you are a

traditional old school Republican
conservative and you see this country

moved to a different place.

Populism, you put in contrast to
traditional conservatism. Now, when you

populism, we all think, and rightly so,
that means Donald Trump.

So you're saying we've gone off track,
and you're basically saying the person

who took us off track is Donald Trump.
Do I have that right?

Well, I don't think entirely, Bill, in
all fairness. Look, for the last five

decades, the Republican Party, you might
be surprised to learn I was a young

Democrat. I am. When I joined the
Republican Party. What?

When Ronald Reagan came to the White
House.

You were a Democrat. I was a young
Democrat.

But I listened to Ronald Reagan. I heard
about the ideals of a strong defense of

limited government, traditional values.

And I joined the Reagan Revolution. And
for 50 years, the Republican Party has

been defined by those conservative
principles.

We principally did political combat with
the liberal Democratic Party. But

as you will concede, the Democratic
Party itself.

has slid farther to the left, the
progressive left, even embracing

lifting up... Believe me, I have the
battle scars for pointing it out. Well,

look, I want to move against it.

I mean, the progressives on the far left
are questioning our support for

traditional allies, even Israel, our
most cherished ally.

But what I wrote the book about is that
in addition to the context with the ever

more left -wing, radical Democratic
Party now in America, conservatives

to know that I think there is a new
threat to our movement from the populist

right that would question our role as
leader of the free world, that would

embrace big government solutions,
including broad -based tariffs, price

controls.

nationalizing American businesses.

I heard Elizabeth Warren, when the Trump
administration announced they were

nationalizing American businesses,
Elizabeth Warren said, I think Donald

came across an idea that I came up with
years ago.

And actually, Bill, that nationalizing
private enterprise is an idea

that... Karl Marx came up with years
ago. But that and marginalizing

values like the right to life.

I just want people to know that while
the Trump administration has gotten a

right, secured the border, extended tax
cuts. And by the way, I said that to him

on the show. You have to agree with him
100 % or he hates you.

I agree.

And there is such a thing as Trump
derangement syndrome.

You know, people who just hate
everything, he could cure cancer

And there were people who would hate it
just because he did it. I agree the

border needed to be fixed.

The tax cuts were extended.

Well, I don't know about that one. In
the wake of October 7th, the

way candidate Trump and President Trump
had stood without apology for Israel and

finally been the first president in
history.

He paid the fight directly to Iran last
year and this year. And he'll be

commended. I know. And I have commended
him. The problem is that he does other

things that are not good.

And I will not stop talking about those.

Doge. The corruption.

The revenge.

path that he's on not conceding
elections these are just the top five i

feel like so i'm sorry but that's how i
feel and i feel like the democrats

finally have an issue with this
corruption i mean there's a senator john

and the democratic party who said that
the today's republicans apropos to your

thing about populism he says they are
the elites they pretend to hate you

with that Well, I do think that this
populist right that's coming up within

our movement really questions the
foundations of conservatism in America.

why I wrote the book, What Conservatives
Believe, because I really want to begin

a conversation about the future of our
movement. Look, we're going to have a

standard bearer in 2028, candidates
coming up in 2026.

But I tell people it's going to be more
important for the people in our party to

talk about what we're for before we talk
about who we're for.

And I want the Republican Party to stay
grounded in those traditional values.

But how about beginning with saying to
the guy who keeps saying, there are ways

you could do it, and I'm talking about
Donald Trump.

Because that's what he says.

Yeah. He does not... It's just insane to
me to absolutely say, you can't run...

It's just plainly in the Constitution.
Your book is a lot about what's in the

Constitution and following that. And
there's nothing more plainer than, you

two terms, not three.

Right.

So... I mean, it seems like we could...
So many of the things we could

come to some agreement with the middle,
like January 6th. Like, Trump, pardon

everybody. Could we say that, yes, some
people were there just for reasons of

who knows? They weren't exactly
tourists, but they weren't having

intent. Other people, can we say some
bad people were there, like the ones who

wanted to hang you?

Can we say those were bad people?

Bill, I made it clear. I had no problem
with the president pardoning people who

got caught up in that day. But for
anyone who assaulted a police officer.

Anybody that violated and vandalized the
seat of our government and sought to

disrupt the counting of electoral
college votes, those people never should

been pardoned, and they should never get
a dime.

No ill feelings about the hanging thing.

Did you ever fear for your life?

Did you actually fear that they would...

that could happen. Well, to be honest
with you, I never felt a greater sense

resolve any day in my life than on
January 6th.

You know, I've often told my kids the
safest place in the world is to be in

center of God's will.

And I really knew I was where I was
supposed to be doing what I was supposed

be doing.

And under the Constitution, the Vice
President's role is only to preside over

session.

Of Congress, where the Electoral College
votes are opened and counted. That's

it. And no vice president in history had
ever asserted any authority to decide

what votes to count or send back to the
states.

So I knew my duty was clear, and I'll
always believe by God's grace I did my

duty.

And I know as a person of faith, because
I know a lot of people of faith, they

say, They think if they die, they'll be
in a better place.

So maybe if they hung you, good thing.

Last issue.

Abortion.

Now, this is one we'll never quite agree
on.

But I get it.

I get your side of it. You know, I
always have.

Some people don't like that about me.
I'm pro -choice, but I understand. It is

becoming a life, and we're just...

killing it before it can fight back.

I'm just okay with that.

Now we find out, even after Roe v.

Wade was overturned, abortion has
increased in these, I guess, across the

country because they don't do it by
having to go to a clinic. You get a pill

over the mail.

Should we outlaw these pills? Is that
where you are in this issue? Well, I

really believe it's one example where
we've seen...

The Trump administration depart from
that conservative agenda.

I mean, I couldn't be more proud that
our administration appointed three of

justices that sent Roe versus Wade to
the ash heap of history where it

But since that time, as you said, Bill,
abortion after the Biden administration.

essentially approved mail -order
abortion, no doctor supervision, with a

that's actually done great harm to many
women around the country, as well as

claimed unborn lives.

It's been a disappointment to me and
other pro -lifers that this

has turned a blind eye to that issue
entirely.

In fact, appointing an abortion rights
supporter.

to lead the Health and Human Services
Department.

So it was part of the impetus for me
writing what conservatives believe,

I really do believe that at the end of
the day.

The Republican Party ought to offer a
choice, not an echo.

Look, I never begrudge anybody, you
included, of having liberal views.

That's what America is all about. You
can believe what you believe. I'll

what I believe. And as long as we
conduct each other with the golden rule,

find our way forward as a country. I
feel like you are the standard for me.

Because I, like all the people,
challenged myself.

And be friendly with. You were probably
as far on the other side as me. And I

hope we can keep that up. I want you to
do Club Random, my podcast, and get

super high with me. Would you do that?

We'll just kick it.

I'll do the podcast. We'll think about
it. All right. Thank you. Mike Pence,

everybody. Thank you, Mr. Vice
President.

And good luck with the book. All right.
Let's read our panel.

See?

I'm friends with everybody.

All right.

Here's a Democratic senator from
Connecticut and author of the book

the Common Good, The Fight for Meaning
and Connection in a Broken America,

Senator Chris Murphy.

And she served under three presidents,
including as U .S. Ambassador to the U

.N., National Security Advisor, and
Director of the Domestic Policy Council,

Ambassador Susan Rice. Thank you.

Okay. Now let's hear from the Democratic
side.

Now, we're a couple of weeks away, three
weeks away from our 250th anniversary.

I don't know if you're getting all the
emails from people in the media asking

your comments. And what do you think is
the most? I am. I bet you people like

you are.

What is your big takeaway? What made
America work?

My answer is balance.

That was the genius of the Constitution,
three branches of government that kept

each one in check. That was what was
new.

That's what we've lost, I feel.

Now the headlines this week are all
about the Republicans are maybe going to

restore that. I've heard this before,
but we do hear rumblings from lots of

Republicans in ways we haven't before.
Last week it was all about the slush

fund, and we heard people saying,
stupid, I'm talking, using stupid, Trump

being stupid, and it's a slush fund.
This week it's about Bill Pulte, who he

tried to, or he didn't try, he is the
director of national intelligence now.

John Thune says we don't. need a
weaponized DNI.

What's going on here? Is this real, this
time?

Is it that they smell blood? That Trump
is going to be, after the midterms,

maybe a lame duck? They see his ratings
are low?

What's up?

I don't think it's real. I mean, I just
watched in the last 24 hours after they

made a whole bunch of noise about this
slush fund, they said they weren't going

to give him his number one priority,
this immigration bill that he wanted, if

didn't do away with the slush fund.

He's said openly that he's... Still
thinking about it. They had an

last night in the Senate to adopt an
amendment that would have made it

completely illegal.

Only a handful of Republicans voted for
it. I think there's only one rule in the

Republican Party and it still holds. He
gets anything that he wants. It's true.

They're starting to make more noise
right now as they get closer to the

election. And I think that.

They think that that will have some
electoral benefit, making more noise.

until they actually start voting against
him, voting to end this war, voting to

tie his hands so that he can't set up
personal political slush funds, I just

don't know that for our democracy the
noise matters that much.

They apparently did have some big
screaming match with each other last

Yeah, and then what happened last night?
They delivered him the vote to pass his

immigration bill without any amendment
that would stop the slush fund from

forward. Listen, I'm with you. I'm
rooting for them to break from him. I

haven't seen it yet. I'd like to see
balance restored.

Yes. I think that one interesting test
of that will be how the Republicans

respond to Bill Pulte.

Because he is now going to be the acting
director of national intelligence. Here

is somebody that has literally no
national security and no intelligence

experience. The statute says that's
required by law in the DNI. He has never

a security clearance.

He's never touched classified material.

Who is he?

He's a housing...

financier and the scion of a fancy
business family. And then he went to the

FHFA and has apparently used that perch
as a way

to operationalize the president's effort
to go after some of his adversaries. So

I think that kind of character with the
mission that the president has overtly

given him.

To go in there and, you know, find
evidence of rigged elections and to go

people within the intelligence community
who are longstanding experts and rid

them of the place, that's quite
worrying. And I think if we care deeply

our national security, which we must, at
a time when we're dealing with Russia

and China and Iran and terrorists, we
need somebody as director of national

intelligence. I do remember when we
created that bureaucracy.

I do remember when we created that
bureaucracy after 9 -11.

A lot of people on the left said, what
are we doing?

Why? Why do we need it? I remember my
joke was, if only we had some sort of

central intelligence agency, which is
now one of the 18 agencies under

the DNI. It just seemed like another
layer of bureaucracy we didn't need.

we don't. Well, no, I do think we do,
and it's not perfect, believe me. We've

both dealt with the intelligence
community and its complexities. But the

why after 9 -11 that concept made sense
was what we discovered when we did the

look -back on 9 -11 was stovepipes
between the FBI and the CIA and other

of the intelligence community weren't
sharing information.

Is the FBI under the DNI? Yes.

So they all are. Yes. And it works.

Well, it works better than not having a
DNI, I think. Right, okay.

I mean, listen, Pulte's qualification,

according to Donald Trump, is that he is
going to be willing to go into the

intelligence files and pull out
information on Trump.

Political opponents. I mean, that's the
only reason this guy got picked, because

he did it at the housing agency, and now
he's going to do it at Intel.

That's the key. That's the key. That's
the only reason that Pelosi is being

nominated for this position. And even if
he only stays on the job for a couple

weeks, that's enough time for him to go
in and stitch out information on a whole

bunch of people that Trump is trying to
destroy.

Okay. Let me ask you another issue.

There is something called the Great
American State Fair Festival that was

planned. Now, this is not the same thing
as the UFC event on the White House

lawn.

Don't get that. Or the race car track
going around the city.

Yes, but there's lots of exciting stuff
in Washington going on.

No, the UFC thing. Look, we have a
redneck president. I'm sorry. We're just

going to have to get you. From
Manhattan.

From Manhattan.

A redneck from Manhattan. He just does
redneck things. Okay.

This is one of the things I don't give a
shit about.

But this other thing was not planned as
a specific Trump thing or a specific

MAGA thing. And they had some acts lined
up. Not the greatest. The Commodores.

Morris Day and The Time. They were
pretty good.

Commodores were good in the day. Very
good. Very. Yes, that's true. That's

Lionel Richie, right? Yeah. Okay.

Well, he's not with them anymore. Okay.

Martina McBride, Bret Michaels, Young
MC, C++ Music Factory, Milli Vanilli. I

would not have left them on. I think it
was just Vanilli.

Right. Yes. It was just.

Right. Right. Because the other one was
discredited for lip syncing. Right.

Right.

I think these people, they all pulled
out.

This is a question about what looks best
for the Democrats, because I don't

think that looks good.

It looks like you are just what people
say about you. You don't really love

America. It looks like you think Trump
is more important than the country

itself. Now it's just a big MAGA rally,
this whole thing, because they all

pulled out. So now it's just Trump and
Lee Greenwood.

Wouldn't it have been better to play
this gig?

It's a month -long gig. Lots of people,
like, just celebrating America. Can't we

all just celebrate America itself and
leave Trump out of it?

And listen, my kids are excited about
the D .C. race, right? Like, I mean,

is stuff.

Obviously, a ton of people love the UFC.
There's going to be people that are

excited about this. But here's what
happened. There was a nonpartisan,

apolitical effort to celebrate America's
250th anniversary.

And instead of just letting that effort
go forward, Donald Trump took it over,

right, to create a parallel.

set of events my understanding is these
artists thought that they were going to

the nonpartisan effort and then when
they found out that it was just a

to a Trump rally, they didn't want to be
part of it. I think this would have

been a lot better for the country if
Trump had decided to just let

professionals, let people who just care
about celebrating America with no

political agenda be part of this. I
agree, there's no reason to overly

politicize this, but Trump decided to
politicize it by essentially shutting

the citizens who were leading it and
turning it into a big MAGA event.

What about the bigger, bigger hero?

There is a pride month, but a different
kind of pride, pride in the country.

There's a big pride gap.

Like 38 % of Americans report feeling
proud. That's not a lot. But it's only

% Democrats, 68 % Republicans.

Should Democrats feel prouder of this
country and show it both really and

politically?

I mean, you're talking to two people who
served their country for most of their

careers. So I... I'm not talking about
you. I'm talking about... I care deeply

about our country, and I'm very proud of
it, but I also think that we're in a

difficult spot, and we need to do
better.

This is part of the reason I wrote this
book about the common good, because

there's actually a lot more agreement
out there in America than you think

what's wrong and what needs to be fixed.

People want healthier small towns and
neighborhoods.

They do think that capitalism has been
corrupted. They want the technology

regulated to save their kids.

We've been fighting on the same issues
year after year after year. They're

important issues, but they're kind of...

stuck in political gelatin from guns to
climate change.

But there is a set of things that makes
the economy more fair, that makes the

technology less poisonous, that makes
your local downtown healthier, that are

actually things that unite left and
right, an agenda about the common good.

And my hope is that this 250th
celebration doesn't become just about

differences between Republicans and
Democrats, but maybe causes us to

that there are actually some things that
could make us feel better about our

lives. that have nothing to do with left
or right and can bring us together.

You also, I noticed, have pulled back on
the idea of litmus tests.

That's kind of a big theme for you now.
I mean, you're talking about the gun

issue, which you were more associated
with than anybody, and you're saying now

that went too far.

Yeah, well, I want a big...

tense for the Democratic Party. And I do
think that we have lost the chair vote

because we've been really judgmental
about people who don't line up with us

all of our litmus test issues.

I also think we should be in the
business of convergence, like converting

people, like trying to convince them
that maybe they're wrong about...

Drag shows being the biggest threat that
is presented to this country. And I

don't think you ever get to be in a
conversation with somebody if you tell

that they can't be a part of your party
or they can't get nominated unless they

line up with you on.

A, B, C, D, and E issues.

So we don't talk to Trump's base very
often. We don't even give ourselves a

chance to say, hey, if you think the
economy is rigged, just come and listen

us a little bit about our ideas. I want
to build a bigger tent party, and I

think that in doing that, you might
actually have the ability to reach into

of the folks that are solid members of
his base and convince them that he's

really a populist fraud.

He's vulnerable now, don't you think,
for that?

I would just add that, you know, in the
current context, the most important

thing I think we need is, you use the
term big tent, and I think that's

absolutely right. We need a coalition of
Americans of all political persuasions

who, in my view, believe in three
fundamental things, the Constitution,

of law, and the animating principle of
this country that we're all created

equal.

Everybody.

Who can subscribe to that, I think, you
know, belongs in the biggest possible

tent we can create.

Is this tent big enough for this Graham
Platner guy?

I must say, I don't want to make any
judgments because I'm just learning who

is. And unfortunately, so is he,
apparently.

I mean, this is a new kind of guy.

And it's not just... in the Democrats,
people who, like, if you look at their

history, you could find things that make
them look very conservative, like a

Nazi tattoo.

What I would, in the past, have
associated with the conservatives.

And then there's things that, you know,
he's also flirted with communism, and

now he's got a sex scandal, which in the
past has been just something that

absolutely made somebody... toxic in the
Democratic Party, unlike in the

Republican Party, where they don't care
at all.

What about this one?

What have you been reading about Mr.
Plattner, and what do you think they

do? Because if he wins, they think
they're going to get the Senate, so it's

very key seat.

Yeah, I mean, this is going to be a
complicated race.

He is...

He's made a lot of mistakes.

He's been pretty clear about it from the
outset.

He's built a pretty big movement in
Maine because people like his ideas.

On the other side, you've got Susan
Collins, who just last night cast one of

deciding votes to give $70 billion to
Trump's secret police. That's a

issue as well.

So I think you're seeing more candidates
run today that don't have perfectly

clean. personal histories and the
question in maine is going to be um is

bridge too far or are his ideas what do
you say you're in the senate well i

think he's the clear i think he's the
clear choice there um but you say nazi

schmatzi and then texting

I'm just asking.

Maybe that's the right answer. Yeah,
like I said, I think this is a super

complicated race, but I think the choice
here is between the incumbent, who has

enabled Trump's corruption, and Graham
Platner, very imperfect, but who has

fought and put his life on the line for
this country, which is not something

that's insignificant. No, it's not. And
I do think it's a different country.

It's a broken country. It's full of
broken people.

with bad information on both sides. And
I think people just go, he's pissed. I

get that.

Yeah, and his last set of allegations
are serious allegations that he's going

have to talk about with the people of
Maine, and they're ultimately going to

make that decision.

But that will be their decision to make.

Okay. Graham Plattner, any thoughts?

I remember when a tan suit was a
scandal.

I think so.

Holding the coffee, remember that?

He had a cup of coffee when he saluted.

See,

whatever it was, he was holding a cup. I
know, things have changed a lot.

Let's talk about Iran, because I'm never
going to get anybody here on this show

who knows more about it than you,
because you were very instrumental in

original Iran deal.

I talked about that.

I mean, I was supportive of that deal. I
remember talking about it.

That horrible night when I had dinner
with Voldemort in his castle.

We did talk about that a lot, about the
Iran deal. And I said, you know, I

thought it was worth a try to bring Iran
into the family of nations. Because,

what, wasn't that the deal? No, but go
ahead.

We weren't trying to bring... We were
just trying to deal with their nuclear

program. But wasn't that the first step?

No. So we did never, okay, then that's
the question. There was other issues

we said, we're going to put those aside
because Iran is doing a lot of bad

things. The reason why I was supportive
of this war, if he hadn't fucked it up,

and I think we all agree now it's been
fucked up, but was because I don't think

anything in the Middle East is going to
get solved until you deal with Iran.

And it was not just the nuclear issue.
It's the fact that they have been state

-sponsored terrorists for years.

Just all of it with Iran is just never
very good.

Correct. Okay.

So we put that aside for the Iran deal
and said we just want to deal with the

nuclear. Was that right to decouple
those?

Yes. Let me explain what we did and why
I think it was the right thing and why I

think, unfortunately, we're really on
the wrong course right now.

First of all, Iran, as you said
absolutely correctly, poses threats on

dimensions. It's missile program. It's
support for proxies in the region. It's

human rights violations.

But the way it poses a direct threat to
Israel, to our allies in the region, to

Europe and potentially to the larger
international community is if it were

to acquire a nuclear weapon or weapons,
plural.

And so back in 2013, we began.

to try an effort without using force,
but using economic pressure and

that brought Iran to the negotiating
table. And after two years of

resulted in a nuclear deal that
prevented Iran from building a

nuclear weapon.

Based on inspections?

Based on, not just inspections, based on
taking 97, 98 % of their fissile

material out of the country, shutting
down their plutonium reactor, making it

impossible for them to put in place the
most highly sophisticated centrifuges.

And you know they weren't feeding?

We know that, we know it for two
reasons. How? Two ways. One, the

community of the United States and even
Israel validated that up until 2018

when... The prior president pulled out.
Not Israel.

Yes. And secondly, that they were not
cheating on the Iran nuclear deal. And

secondly, the IAEA, the International
Atomic Energy Agency, had 24

-7 intrusive inspections in all of
Iran's nuclear facilities. So when the

States withdrew from the nuclear deal,
the deal was being implemented fully.

But even if you don't buy that... If
Netanyahu thought they weren't cheating,

why was he so adamant to get out of the
deal? Because this is the right

question. It gets back to your original
point. It wasn't just about nuclear in

the minds of the Israelis.

So he was lying when he said... No, not
lying.

Well, that's what he said to me. He
said, we don't believe that they're not

cheating. They're going to get a weapon
and we've got to get it.

And when we had a mechanism in place to
prevent them from getting it, he...

urged President Trump to get out of the
deal. They got out of the deal. And what

happened? Iran built up its arsenal. Now
they have 440 kilograms of highly

enriched uranium, up enough for 10
bombs. They have a sophisticated missile

program. They now control the Strait of
Hormuz.

And they are tanking the global economy
as a consequence.

And what have we done? We went to war.

And we have not...

either dealt with the nuclear program or
verifiably dealt with the missile

program or the proxy problem. We've made
it worse. It's an F .C. me on every

level. I mean, the regime change didn't
happen. Uprising didn't happen. We

didn't get the nukes.

We didn't even get their military,
really, we found out. And we look weak.

Correct. And now we have to go back.

to the negotiating table, and we're
going to go back with a much weaker hand

end up with a deal that I will be very
surprised if it's nearly as good as what

we got in 2015.

So that's why it doesn't make sense.

No, it doesn't.

Every president has been briefed on the
consequences of military action like

what Trump has taken. And they were all
told two things. One, Iran's going to

close the Strait of Hormuz. It's going
to shut down the global economy. And

two... With an air campaign alone, you
are not going to be able to get their

nuclear program. You're not going to be
able to get all their missiles. You're

not going to be able to get all their
drones.

And so that's where we're stuck with.
We're stuck with the situation in which

the strait is closed down. That was a
foreseeable accident.

And Iran believes that it's taken our
best shot and survived because open

reporting says they still have 70
percent of their missiles yet still in

And so, unfortunately.

Everybody knew that this was going to be
the outcome, and maybe because

Netanyahu convinced Trump that there was
going to be a quick regime fall and a

pro -American, pro -Israeli government
taking its place, he bought into that

flawed logic.

All right.

Hypothetical question.

Tomorrow, Donald Trump decides he wants
to spend more time with his family.

And he resigns.

J .D. Vance. J .D. Vance.

J .D. Vance is the president.

What would the new policy toward Iran
be, and what should it be? We got a new

slate. We got a new guy who wasn't crazy
about it to begin with.

What do you think it would be?

I mean, that's like speculating about
speculating. I mean, who knows? No, it's

one... But I have no idea. What should
it be? If we had a new... What should it

be, I can answer. What new slate could
we have?

Well, here we are now as a result of the
decision that...

President Trump made to go to war with
no good options. We've got bad options

and worse options. We either escalate
the war, which is unlikely to lead to

anything better than what we have now,
probably much worse, or we get into a

negotiation with Iran, if they'll even
negotiate with us, from a position of

weakness. where they now control the
Strait of Hormuz and can dial it up and

down, where they have this nuclear
material, where they have a greater

to rush to a bomb.

And we're starting from, you know, less
than square one. But those are the two

options. And whether you're J .D. Vance
or Donald Trump or anybody else, that's

the hand that has been dealt you as a
result of this decision -making.

I mean, somebody can just be explained
by basic incompetence.

Right. We have incompetent people
running this war.

And so I don't.

I don't think these guys can negotiate
their way out of a paper bag.

I don't think they can negotiate a way
to get the Strait open. So my feeling is

we need to end the war, and then it's
likely going to be other players, the

Europeans or Gulf countries, that are
going to come in and find a way to get

Strait reopened. I just don't think that
these guys have the ability to do it.

All right. Thank you very much. I
appreciate it. Time for Newark.

All right. Thank you.

Okay, new rule. The Florida cop who
pulled over a woman for distracted

insisting he saw her holding a phone in
her right hand, only to find out she

doesn't have a right hand, but gave her
a ticket anyway,

must not be judged too harshly. Being a
cop is always dangerous, and for all he

knew, she could have been armed.

New rule, the half dozen kids who are
hospitalized in San Diego after doing

Benadryl challenge, where they consume,
yes, a large quantity of Benadryl to

induce hallucinations, must be
congratulated.

That's six kids who won't be dying from
fentanyl.

Six kids who got it through their heads
that today's designer drugs are just too

risky and said, you know what?

Let's party with the stuff grandma takes
before a flight.

New Rule Until 60 Minutes worked through
all its behind -the -scenes turnover

drama. They have to change their name to
Give Us a Minute.

I don't think anybody said you're fired
on TV this much since The Apprentice.

That's so funny.

Sunday night used to be the one time of
the week when families weren't fighting.

One too many there.

New rule, whether you're about to have a
fight in a movie or whether you're

about to have a fight in a bar, everyone
has to come up with a better threat

than, I'm going to tear off your
something and shove it up your

The human body has only so many things
to tear off and only so many holes to

shove them in.

Fortunately, there's a simple fix.
Before you start fighting, always

tear them a new asshole.

New rule,

it's not cute anymore when someone runs
a dog for mayor of some small town.

You know, it was funny the first hundred
times, but I say if you're going to do

it again and run Max for mayor...

You have to go all the way and put out
an attack ad.

Max wants to be your choice for mayor,
but he doesn't even know how to read or

write.

Max claims he's a good boy, but do good
boys spend their weekends eating trash?

Isn't it time for a candidate who won't
drag his ass on your new carpet?

I'm Tom Smith. I'm qualified to be your
mayor, and Max is not, because I can't

stress this enough, he's a fucking dog.

And... Finally, new rule,
congratulations to all the people who

graduated from college this month, last
month, yes, it's commencement season,

the time of year when college kids make
the transition from campus life to their

parents' basement.

I just want to say congratulations, you
did it. And by it, I mean had your first

lesbian kiss.

As for the degree you just got, that's a
little more complicated.

There was a lot of booing at the
commencement ceremonies this year, which

weird because you know how hard it is to
make bombing at a graduation speech?

All you have to do is give a little pep
talk, tell a joke about college debt,

and lie about how anything is possible.

But this year, speakers did not read the
room.

Hey, geniuses, maybe don't mention AI to
the people whose future jobs it's about

to take.

Artificial intelligence is the next
industrial revolution.

The question is whether you will help
shape artificial intelligence.

We do not know.

AI is rewriting production as we sit
here.

I got to say, the kids are right.
They're right to fear that in the age of

that degree they're holding is about as
useful as your unused miles on Spirit

Airlines.

And really, isn't that the big question

we should now be asking about education?

Now that you can get the answer to
everything by asking your phone, why are

going to college at all?

Anyone? Bueller?

Anyone?

Rahm Emanuel, who is definitely not
running for president, just

released his five -point grand bargain
plan for higher education, as private

citizens with no political aspirations
often do.

Rom wants to make college great again,
cheaper, faster, more accessible.

It sounds exciting and looks good on a
campaign website, but it's a little like

buying manned fighter jets in the age of
drones.

As it is, only about 35 % of graduates
get a job in their field of study. And

now with AI, English major, AI can
write.

Computer science major, AI can code.

Music major, AI already has songs on the
charts. Philosophy major, AI can learn

to write names on coffee cups.

And it's not like Collins was doing such
a bang -up job before Google

Gemini came along.

600 desperate professors from the
California University System just signed

open letter to let people know that a
lot of the kids coming into their

classroom have to be taught middle
school math.

Sadly, today many young people cannot
locate on a map the countries we're

bombing.

Fox News sent a reporter to the beach on
Memorial Day to find out what many

typical young adults know.

Nothing. Not even what the holiday
means. Not who we fought against in our

or why we fought them. World War II?

That might have been against Vietnam.

The level of basic shit these kids are
let out of high school not knowing?

Like the country we gained our
independence from?

Who could know that?

Oh, they know who knows.

Yeah.

Why bother learning with context when
ChatGPT can not only just tell me the

answer, but also compliment me for
asking such an astute question?

Yeah, that's the one thing the robots
figured out early on. We're less likely

oppose them if they're always acting
like they kind of want to fuck us.

You know, it's so easy to get...

Seduced by technology, I remember a
teacher once scolding me for using a

calculator, saying I should learn math
because you're not always going to have

your calculator walking around in the
real world.

Except now I don't have to know math
because I do always have a calculator

I'm walking around in the real world.

So fuck you, Mr. Banderholtz.

No. His point was not wrong. The
calculator disabled a part of my brain.

Look, we all want the good parts of AI,
solving medical mysteries, figuring out

clean energy, but the vast majority of
us will never use it for that. For us,

it's a lobotomy with a monthly fee.

We're not using it to cure cancer. We're
using it because we forgot how to make

toast.

We emptied the kids' heads by letting
them out of high school without knowing

anything. And then, what a perfect time
for robots to come along and say, no

problem, I got you.

I'm your brain now.

That is one big, grand experiment we're
running here. Can humans survive if we

completely outsource our brains to
something that does all our thinking,

Jill Biden used to do for Joe?

Fake laugh machine.

Now, I'm no commencement speaker.

They wouldn't let me near that podium.
But I do have a message for the

graduates, and it's this.

You are not wrong.

You do face an existential issue here.
But the good news is, it's one

in your power to fix.

Are there issues that college students
in the past faced, like ending the

Vietnam War?

or civil rights, or climate change.

They all involve having to convince the
older generation to do something.

This one's all you. You are the AI
generation, and you only have to

yourself.

I think it's great that you have this
instinct to get involved and take up

causes, and many are worthy, but get
serious.

Your issue shouldn't be Zionist or
trans.

or plastic straws. No, your mission,
should you decide to accept it, is to

for humans and make sure we're not
completely replaced.

And you can't do it if you are
hopelessly dependent on the thing that's

replacing you.

90 % of today's college students admit
they've used AI academically, and 73 %

the faculty say they've had to deal with
AI integrity issues, formerly known as

cheating.

Maybe the commencement speaker should be
booing you.

AI has made college one big robot.

Circle Jerk, where students use AI to
write papers and professors use AI to

grade them.

Okay, can you see in this equation who
has been completely cut out?

The humans.

It's the human kids.

This is your issue.

Fight for the humans.

All right, that's our show. I want to
thank my guest, Senator Chris Murphy,

former Ambassador Susan Rice, and former
VP Mike Pence.

Bob Brandon drops every Monday on
YouTube, or listen wherever you get your

podcasts. Go watch Overtime on YouTube.

Thank you very much, ladies and
gentlemen.

Thank you, guys.