All language subtitles for Superstore s05e10_English

- Make sure the negotiator
pushes for maternity leave.

That's important--
and holiday pay.

Here, to remind you.

- It's all
in the union proposal,

so I don't think I'll need
a reminder.

Huh, cinnamon.

I'm intrigued by
the non-peppermints.

Where is Sandra?

- Are you sure
she's really coming?

Maybe you should just
leave without her.

- [inhales sharply] They said
bring two store reps.

Plus, she yelled "dibs" so loud
at that meeting.

- Oh, Jonah,
little negotiating tip--

walk away so they know
you're serious.

When I bought my Corolla,

I hid in the bathroom
for hours.

- I will keep that
in my back pocket.

You're so nervous right now.
- Yeah. No, I know.

I just don't want them
to screw us

and leave us
with no contract.

- Hey, you didn't even think

that they would sit down
with us, but they did,

so obviously
they're scared.

Relax. I honestly think this
is all gonna work out.

- God, you really do,
don't you?

So annoying.

- Look, I really wish that you
could be there with us,

and I promise to text you
updates as soon as I can.

- Yes, please, even if it's
bad news, it's okay.

And it might be good news,
in which case I'd be shocked,

but, you know,
happy, obviously.

- [sighs]
Sorry I'm late.

Jerry had never seen me
in a blazer,

so the morning got
a little busy.

[chuckles]
- Cool.

[upbeat music]

♪

- Some of this stuff seems
too nice to be in clearance,

like "Ottawa's
Tallest Buildings."

- No, this junk needs
to go in the trash.

Nobody's buying it.
- [scoffs]

More like no one's selling it.

Does anyone remember
when I worked here?

Carts overflowed.

Now I'm stuck watching you guys
blob around all day

while I waste my talents
in the vision center.

- Helping people see?
- I know.

A dog can do it.

- No one moved product like me
back at Sturgis & Sons.

I even got a plaque that said,
"Dad's Number One Sales Boy."

- I'm sure you were good,
like, back in the old days,

but I'm just saying,
in modern times,

I was the best salesperson
in the store.

- I think I might still have
some moves left in me.

In fact,
on a good blood-sugar day,

I might even be
better than you.

- Okay, Glenn.

Why don't we pick out items
for each other?

And if you sell yours first,

I'll take over your bathroom
trash duty for three months.

- Okay, I'm in.

- You know what?
I'm in, too.

Somebody's been putting

what may or may not be
dog poop in that trash,

and I'm gonna let one
of you guys

figure out the mystery.

- What's up with the tree?

We doing a dystopian
nightmare Christmas this year?

- No, some raccoons
just went HAM

on it in storage.

Oh, hey, so are Jonah
and Sandra there?

- Yep, he's looking
for a parking spot right now.

Stand by.
Stand by.

Okay, great.
He's got one.

- You doing okay with all this?

- Yeah, I'm fine.
I'm totally fine. Why?

- I just thought
it'd be tough for you.

I mean, I know you like
being in control,

and in this case, someone
so close to you

gets to be there,
and it's like,

"Is he gonna come through?"

But I'm glad I'm wrong.

[holiday music playing]

- What happened to this tree?

- Oh, seems like some raccoons
definitely had sex in it...

or with it.

- Georgia, hi.

Jonah Simms
from Store 1217.

- Oh, so good to meet you
in person.

- [chuckles]
- You look just like you sound.

- Yeah, I-I get that a lot
for some reason.

Um, Georgia
is kind of a legend.

She's won, like,
a dozen union contracts.

Really, it's amazing work
that you're doing.

Thank you.
- Please.

I talk for a living.
You guys do real work.

And I plan to get
you paid for it.

- Well, it's about time,

'cause they've pushed us around
for too long.

They just kept pushing
and pushing,

and they're about to find out
what happens

when I get to the edge.

- I'm passionate, too.
It just manifests differently.

- Zap and wear sweater.
- Mm.

- "Microwavable for up to nine
minutes of piping-hot comfort."

Oh. [scoffs] Easy.
I'll sell the hell out of this.

- Well, Glenn, I have found
your item right here.

- Oh.

- It's either a pig-shaped shoe

or a shoe-shaped pig.

It has a handle but no spout.

This is a bad thing.

- No problem.
- Well, Garrett,

you'll be working with this
Tony Danza popcorn machine.

- Oh, okay, well, at least mine
serves a purpose.

This pops "Tony Danza brand
popcorn cartridges only.

Cartridges not included."

- Hey.

How's Jonah doing out there?
Crushing it?

God, you ever look at that guy
and get so proud,

you have to look away?
[chuckles]

- Well, all I know so far
is that he's got parking.

There's probably just
nothing else to report.

I mean, in which case he could
have said, "Nothing to report,"

but he didn't,
and that's fine.

- Don't worry.

If he texts me first,
I'll download you.

- Amy, what's the scoop
on the poop?

- Nothing yet.
- But we'll let you know.

- I will let you know.
He's gonna text me first.

- Cool, we'll just get
a text tree going.

Jonah texts whichever one
of us--gut says me.

- It's not gonna be you.
I've seen his favorites.

You're not in there.
- What?

- Nice, Amy.

Guess who's gonna be cleaning
this up all afternoon.

Come on, buddy.

- [sighs]

- I look at these chumps,

I see breakfast,
lunch, dinner.

- Is your chair
a little bit low?

- Is it?
Hang on.

[air hisses]

- What are you--

- I think it's--
- Just make it come back.

- It won't do it. It's--
- Morning, folks!

- So then you sit up.
- Sorry I'm late.

Ah, some, uh--some pretty
big numbers

in this proposal of yours.

100% premium coverage?
- We think that's fair.

- Correct.

The workers have voted

to make health care
priority one.

Right--right, Sandra?
- Yep.

- I mean, I applaud you
for trying,

but we're not paying 100%
of premiums.

- Okay, maybe a more
workable number is 70%.

- Hmm.
- Yeah?

- Uh, all the way down to 70%?
Just--

- Yeah, I think
this one's broken.

- So any word from Jonah?

Good negoshe,
bad negoshe?

- Nope, not yet.
Still early.

- I'll bet they're blowing it.

- Okay, I'm gonna go check
on that.

Need any help
with whatever this is?

- Okay, I know
what you're thinking.

It looks great.
It just needs lights.

- Ooh, Amy,
how's union stuff going?

- I know what you know, Janet,
which is [bleep] nothing!

But when there is news, I, uh--
well, I'll tell you first.

[holiday music playing]

- Whoa, you're, like,
rich-lady tense right now.

- I know. I'm just trying not
to worry about it,

but then people just keep
asking me about it,

which is making me
worry about it, and...

[sighs] Actually,
I really need to get out.

Um, how about I go buy us
a Christmas tree?

Because this isn't one.

- Great.
I'll warm up the truck.

Cheyenne, let's go.

- No, you guys don't have
to come with me.

- Oh, we absolutely do.

I mean, I love this girl,

but she is just
the kind of sucker

to pay through the nose
for a Douglas fir

and then come back
with an eastern white pine.

[Cheyenne laughing]

It's true, Amy.
You totally would.

- Okay, fine, whatever.
Let's just go.

.

- This tree farm has
a huge selection,

so let's talk game plan.

We're looking
for blue-green color,

conical shape,
short needles.

Don't be afraid to give it
a few kicks.

That's legally well
within your right.

[engine turning over]
- What about that one?

- Oh, yeah.
That one's perfect.

[engine turns off]

- What?
Wait, no, no.

Guys, we can't just--
That's a tree!

Like, a treetree!

- And if you have any problems,

my man Tony's email
is right here on the box.

Check it out.

- [clears throat] Well...
- Sorry to intrude.

But you have the exact same
physique as my friend Chris.

Would you mind trying this on?
- Sure.

No problem.
- Thank you.

- I don't remember you
ever talking

about a friend named Chris.

- Oh, he just moved here.
He's an archaeologist.

- [grunts]
- Hmm, no.

Thank you, but this
is all wrong for Chris.

It makes you look
so muscular--oh.

And he's trying to get less
attention from women...

and occasionally men?

- Muscular?
Really?

- Yeah, you know, and if you
want to keep that body tight,

nothing's better than
a healthy snack like popcorn.

- I think he knows what
he's doing with his body.

I mean, have you seen
the sweater?

It's--why are you
taking that off?

- Yeah, thanks.
I'm--I'm just browsing today.

- Oh, come on.
- But--

No, you have to buy one
of these!

- Yeah, browsing's
for cowards, dude!

- Our customers prefer
when cashiers stand.

- At least give them
anti-fatigue mats.

Or do your customers also

prefer cashiers
with tendinitis?

- Okay, uh, we can allow
for mats

if the employees
supply their own.

- We'll consider that.
Thank you.

- Uh, I'm sorry.

To be clear,
you want the workers

to buy safety equipment
for your stores?

What are we gonna throw
in next--carts, shelving?

You know, maybe--maybe
we could pay your salaries.

How much do you make?

Maybe I could go
get my checkbook.

- [grunts]

- You know,
I saw some bagels out there.

Let's take a five?
- Yeah.

- We cannot just
chop down a tree.

We're not the paper towel guy.

- Come on, Amy,
it's Christmas.

Plus, this will be
the first legal thing

I've ever done in the woods.

- No, guys.
What if one of us gets hurt?

I have enough
to worry about today.

Dina.
- Cheyenne, give her the axe.

Now, just as an experiment,

take one whack,
all right?

You don't have to go
full fell.

If you don't like it,
tree farm it is.

- Fine.
One swing for Dina.

- And you're not gonna want
to hit it straight on, okay?

Angle it down like you're
dealing cards to a baby.

- [grunts]

- Ooh.

- I mean,
I guess I see the appeal.

Eat my axe!
- Gross, Amy.

- "Axe," Cheyenne.
"Axe."

- Oh, that's a weird thing
to say.

Who wants to eat an axe?

- Timber!

- No, you don't
say that until--

- Timber!

- No, no, you wait and say it
when it falls.

both:
Timber!

- Paul Bunyan can suck it.

[both cheering]

- Oh, um, Amy,
I'm so sorry,

but could you just step back,
like, a teensy bit?

[screams]

- Oh, she's crowning!

[laughs]

Finish her, Sosa.

- Let's do this!

[grunts]

[Amy and Cheyenne cheering]
- Timber!

We did it!
- Chopped, fool!

- We chopped you, tree!
- Yeah, fool!

- [giggles]

Okay, so, um,
to get it inside...

- Yeah, it's a solid question.
- I have no idea.

- Excuse me, ma'am.

Are you looking for a fancy way

to display
your pig-based sauces?

Well, no look no further.

Nope, you hate it.

Okay, I can see that.
Sorry to waste your time.

- Hey, don't apologize.
I get it.

I work in sales myself.
- No kidding.

- Well, beachfront timeshares
in Fort Lauderdale

pretty much sell themselves,
you know?

Hot tub, wraparound balcony,
great views.

It's the perfect
vacation getaway.

- Really?
- Mm-hmm.

- It must be
pretty pricey, though.

- You would think,
but it actually turns out to be

much cheaper than a hotel.

- No.
- Mm-hmm.

- Okay, I-I don't want
to put you out,

but if I gave you my email,

is there any way that
I could get more information?

- We've come too far to give up
this much, this soon.

- You want to go in there and
demand everything--I get it.

I've done it, and I've lost.

Now, we all want to win
in there, right?

- Yes, of course.

- Then I suggest we--
Ah.

- Oh, my God.
- Oh, no, are you okay?

- I'm good.
I'm good.

- Here.

- Oh. Oh.
- That's, um--ooh.

A lot of blood, though.
- That's--that is--

- No, I'll be--I'm--I'm--
I'll be fine.

- Are--are you sure?

- Okay, no.
[groans softly]

This is
an emergency-room situation.

- Yeah.

- I chopped a tree!
Now I'm driving a forklift!

[yells]

- Now, you're all clear
on this end.

- Okay, yeah, you're looking
good on the trunk side.

[cell phone chimes]
- Oh, crap!

That might be Jonah.

Hold on, give me a second.

Yes.
Yes, it's him.

"Georgia had bagel accident"?

What the hell does that mean?

- Ah, he probably used
voice-to-text.

I bet he meant, "George
had a baked quail egg salad."

Oh, this George sounds like
a bit of an oddball.

- You know what?
I'm just--

I'm gonna call him real quick.

[cell phone vibrates]

- Hey.
- Hi.

You answered.

How are things going
over there?

- Well, uh,
Georgia cut herself.

She's out of commission
for the rest of the day,

and Corporate won't set
another meeting until March.

- No!
No, no, no!

Get back in there.
- What are you talking about?

We can't negotiate
without Georgia.

- Yes, you can!
I mean, I don't know.

Maybe this is just
the adrenaline talking--

I chopped down a tree,
by the way.

- What? Why?
- Because I wanted to.

Well, I didn't want to
at first,

but then Dina made me want to,

and then Cheyenne
gave me an axe and--

- Okay, I'll want
to know more about that.

- Look, Jonah,
you know what we want.

Just see what you can get.

It--it'll be better than them
pushing this till March,

and then they're gonna
make it July,

and then it's gonna be October.
- Yeah, yeah.

No, you're right.
You're right.

We can do this.
- Yes!

Yes, you can!

You are smart!
You got this!

- I love you. Thank you.
Got to go, bye.

- Oh, Amy!
The tree!

- Oh!
[gasps]

[electricity buzzing]

- And if you follow the news,

you know that
microwavable sweaters

are the leading cause
of nipple cancer.

It's true. It's a fact.
- Really? It's just--

[people groan and gasp]

Huh.
[button clicking]

.

[soft music]

- So sorry, sir.

There's a Target
five minutes away.

Honestly, it's nicer.

All right, well, um,
we have a power outage.

- Lack of electricity.

Technically,
it's still in here

in the walls,

but we can't get it out
via the wires.

- Right, so, evidentially,
a tree fell

and hit a transformer box,
weirdly.

- That is literally
all we know.

- What if Corporate did this

to intimidate us
in negotiations?

- Yeah, they're saying
we're powerless as a union.

- Or they're saying we have
no heat as a union.

Never mind.
Sayid's was better.

- Jonah probably said
something to upset them.

I don't know why you let him
tag along with Sandra.

- What?
No.

Jonah didn't say anything.
He's--he's doing fine.

I just spoke to him.

all: What?
- What did they say?

- It's going great.

Yes, the union negotiator had
to step out for the afternoon,

but Jonah and Sandra
have got it covered.

- So it's just
the two of them...

in there by themselves
with no grown-up.

- A 75-cent wage increase?

We're asking for $3.
- You're floor workers.

It's not your fault that you
don't get the ins and outs

of the budget.

- We may be floor workers,
but we're not morons.

I-I actually went
to business school.

- And I'm engaged
to be married.

- Exciting.

Look, if your negotiator
were here,

she'd tell you that this
is the best deal

you're gonna get.
- You're right, she's not.

But that doesn't mean that
you get to just sprinkle

a few crumbs
and expect a thank-you.

We're--we're not here
for the crumbs, you know?

W-w-we're here for the whole,
you know, cookie.

The--or the--the pie.

The whole baked good.

- Okay, just relax.

- We don't get to relax!

That's kind of the point.

No, we go to work mopping up
scum in your stores

and--and ruining our knees
lifting boxes,

and after all of that,
we still can't afford rent

or--or to go to a doctor
when we're sick

or to--to buy a car

instead of taking
five different buses to work.

- Five buses?
Really?

- The 34 to the 66

to the 94 to the 70
to the 58X.

- [sighs]

Look, guys,
we want to work with you.

It's just that this stuff
is kind of complicated.

- We'll make it simple for you.

Do better,
or we go on strike.

- We're gonna take
a sidebar.

- Oh, you're--
you're all gonna go.

Huh.
Okay.

- Are you shopping?

I thought all
the customers had left.

- Well, I really need
ice cream cones.

- You stay right here.

You're not getting out of this
store without a pig shoe.

- Hey, someone's still here.

Do you like popcorn

but wish the process
was more complicated?

- There he is!

The man born to wear
this sweater.

- I really just need
ice cream cones.

- Hello, again.
- [yells] Leave me alone!

Get away from me!
Get away from me!

[all clamoring]

- I hope Jonah knows not
to take the first offer,

because a lot of the time,
that's actually the worst one.

- If I were Corporate,
I'd just say no to everything.

Who are you, a couple of chumps
from the town dump?

- Okay, guys, we need to stop
talking about this

and get back to work.
- Oh, I know!

We could all help bring in
the Christmas tree.

- What Christmas tree?

- Do you mean the tree
that fell on the transformer?

Is it a Christmas tree?

That's such a fun guess,
Cheyenne.

I would've guessed maple,
but that's just me.

Someone should be writing
these down

just to see who gets closest.

- [sighs]
No one left to sell to.

- Yeah, I guess
we should call it a draw.

- Yeah, it's too bad.
- [sighs]

- I bet someone
would've really loved this.

I mean,
it's so warm and soft.

- Ooh, like a bird belly.

- Also, is it getting chilly
in here?

- Glenn, you know
what he's doing, right?

- Yeah, I know.
We're just talking.

- It might be nice
to warm it up like cocoa

and just snuggle in.

- Oh, that does sound nice.

- Glenn, look at me.

You gave Mateo that sweater
because it's terrible.

- Yeah.

- Besides, the microwave
doesn't even work

during a blackout.

- Yeah.
- It's a great color.

[chuckles]

It's medium.
- Medium?

That used to be my size.

- I blew it, didn't I?

I did. I did.
I blew it.

- No!
You, um...

Hey, you think they shellac
this table in house?

- The team talked things over.

- If I could just say--
- No need.

We've decided to accept
your proposals in full.

Expect a memo of understanding
from Legal soon.

- Does that mean...
- I, uh...

I think so.

- Are these axe marks?

Someone definitely cut
this thing down.

- You know, actually I heard
that teens are going around

chopping down trees these days.

It's called lumberjacking.

I saw it on "20/20."
[cell phone chimes]

It's weird, but it's true.

Oh, my God.

They did it.
They made a deal.

- They did it?
- Dang!

- Yep, he text me, too.
Got it a couple of minutes ago.

Didn't want to make you
feel bad.

.

[indistinct chatter, laughter]

[holiday rock music playing]

♪

- Ice cream cocktail?

Everything frozen
in Grocery is melting.

- Sure, thanks.

Aren't you lactose intolerant?

- Yeah, it's gonna be bad.

I told Bo to sleep at
his mom's house tonight.

- I didn't know that
eight people could sidebar,

but they all went.

I mean, at some point, Sandra
and I are the sidebar, right?

- Yeah, I mean, sidebar is two,
three people max--

at least on "The Good Wife."

- Wait, are we having one
right now?

- [gasps]
Is this my first sidebar?

- We're having one.
- Oh, my God.

It's so exciting.
- [chuckles]

Honestly, I am still
a little in shock.

You must be, too.

You were convinced I was gonna
blow it this morning.

- No, I wasn't!
- Yeah.

"Call me when you lose.
Okay, bye!"

- Okay,
that is not what I said!

I maybe thought it just
a little bit

because we always lose,

because Corporate sucks
and everybody always sucks.

Well, almost everybody--
not you.

You did it.

- Come on.
We did it.

- Oh.
- Sandra and me.

- [chuckles]

[cell phone rings]

[gasps]
Ooh, it's Maya.

- Uh-oh.
- I should call her back.

How does this sound?

Ugh, what a bummer
about the union.

- [chuckles]
I don't know.

It still kind of sounds like
you're a little happy about it.

- I'll work on it.

- [chuckles]

- I'm assuming you heard.

- Yeah, I did, unfortunately.

I mean, I guess the union was
a lot stronger than we thought.

- Well, actually,
that's why I was calling.

Cloud 9 just got bought out.
- What?

- Yeah, we were acquired by
this big tech company--Zephra.

I guess it's been
in the works,

and they finalized it
this afternoon.

- This--this afternoon?

- During
the negotiations, yeah.

Crazy.

And the good news is
the new company

doesn't have to recognize
the union contracts,

so our people were just like,
"Go ahead, agree to whatever,"

just to end the meeting.

- So everything our employees
thought they won...

- Gone.

- Right.

So, uh, what does this mean
for the company?

- Big picture?
Who knows?

They tell me nothing,

but for now, I just wanted to
let you know, no more union.

Hey, I've got to go make
a bunch more calls, okay?

I'm sorry. Bye-bye.
[line beeping]

- Oh, oh, there you are.

Dina busted out
the cart-jousting stuff.

Come watch.
I made the finals.

- Yeah, actually, I--
- Hold on, hold on!

Here, I don't want to break it.

I-I want to keep it
as a memento.

I know it's dumb, but...

I don't know.
Today was a good day.

- It was.
It was a great day.

- Let's go!
Pick your carts!

- No, no, no, no, no!
I got first!

- Now, I want a clean fight.
No head, neck, or groin.

[holiday music playing]