Original subtitles

- Aah!

Damn bloody-- [speaking Swedish]

I'm not having this!

How's it going, bros? It's PewDiePie.

You're about to watch me get the absolute shit scared out of me.

[overlapping screaming]

Why did I do this?

This show takes what I already do,

getting scared of horror games,

but taking it to the next level,

a really fucked-up level.

Okay, bros. Oh, my God! Oh, no!

So if you love watching me get scared shitless...

Let me out!

You're gonna love "Scare PewDiePie."

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

[hip-hop music]

♪ ♪

[door buzzer]

- Buzz us. Buzz us.

No, it's not working.

- If you want us to leave,

you have to say the magic phrase.

- But not bananas.

- He can't open that door.

- No, we must get this door open.

- [grunts] Okay.

- I got you. I got you.

Right here. - Fuck you.

Okay. Oh, shit, that's not stable.

- Want to get on my shoulders?

- How's it going, bros? It's PewDiePie.

Special parkour edition today, obviously.

- You are gonna do the most exciting game play ever.

- Ever? - Ever!

- Okay, what? - Are you ready?

- Yes, tell me! - Are you exci--

are you excited? - Yes!

- Okay, we're going to an office, all right?

- Yes.

- And you are gonna answer fan mail to your fans.

If I had a microphone, I would--it would drop.

It--boom!

All right, let's go. I think we've talked enough.

- Okay, cool.

♪ ♪

The show is called "Scare PewDiePie," right?

It's more like "Mind-fuck PewDiePie."

I don't even know what's real or not anymore.

♪ ♪

Is this the office? - This is the office.

- Thank you. Great.

- Oh, okay.

- Hmm.

Already late.

Little bit suspicious.

- Ta-da!

- Oh, you weren't lying.

What the--what?

This is-- this is very spot on.

- That's your seat. - "Felix Q&A."

- Yeah, sit here. - Here?

- Yeah. - This is my chair?

- That's your chair. - Okay.

- Felix, your fans are a big part of who you are.

- Yes. - And so what we have done

is we've collected some fan questions.

- Okay. - Okay?

And we would love for you

to read the questions and answer them.

- That's it? No tricks?

- No tricks. - Promise?

- Promise. Are you ready to begin your Q&A?

- Yes. Yes, I'm ready.

- We're gonna go shoot some shots of the van.

Jacob, let's go.

- You don't like the Q&A, Damon?

- I have no interest.

Bye.

Let's go out the front, guys.

- How's it going, bros? This is PewDiePie.

Welcome to "Felix Q&A."

- Oh, my God, you've just messed it up on the--

- No, no, they're fine. - That's our camera.

- Shh! It's fine. Let's do this.

First question...

Good name. You did it.

Advertise your product or brand here contact www.SubtitleDB.org today

Are you trying to start a fire on my desk?

27 people thought this was a good idea.

That's interesting.

It's hard to read because there's so many comments.

Some videos have literally thousands of comments,

and I can't read all of them, so that's hard.

What the fuck?

- Hold on.

Yeah, the lights just went out in here.

Hello?

- Great.

- Damon! The light--

- Sorry. Up. - All right.

Jeez.

Just read the last one.

I'm gonna go get you a water.

- Yeah, that's 'cause it was--

you kind of stumbled over it.

- Okay. Pimp man yo...

Uh, not-- it's not--

it's as hard as it is for you as it is for me.

I don't know what to tell you.

But he has a bright idea for me.

I should put all the bad comments

in a folder on my desk and light them on fire.

That sounds like a terrible idea, Pimp man yo.

I don't--Pimp man yo, you need to chill out, all right?

This fucking light needs to chill out too.

Fuck.

Guys?

[loud bang] [speaking Swedish]

[creepy music]

Hello?

- Felix...

- Oh, fucking--

- Come out into the hall.

Play the quiet game with me.

- Oh, my God.

- You will find a helmet and a lantern.

To win, you will have to stop yourself from screaming.

- Ugh.

♪ ♪

Oh, my God.

- There's a camera with a microphone on the lantern.

Do you see it? - I see it.

- If you scream above 80 decibels,

you get a strike.

Three strikes and you're out.

Pay attention!

- Oh, sorry. I just kissed you.

What the fuck?

What?

- If you fail two levels... - Yes?

- You must face the ultimate trial.

- No!

- Are you ready to play the quiet game?

- No, I'm not!

- Are you ready to master death?

- Not--what?

- There's only one way out.

- Where?

- Punch your way through the vortex.

- Punch my way?

Are you serious? - They're coming behind you.

- What? - I suggest you move.

- Here? [vortex buzzes]

No! Okay.

Okay, bros, I'm doing this for you!

All right, where do I go?

- You need to keep your voice down

to pass this trial.

- Okay.

Oh, what the fuck?

Okay, this is really fucking creepy.

Oh, what the fuck?

[woman sobbing]

Oh, God, more-- more crying ladies.

Okay, great.

[woman sobbing]

Okay, I'm sorry.

Is that Kevin?

'Cause I don't care if it's Kevin.

[woman sobbing]

This is a weird-ass maze, dude.

Okay, I did it. Okay, I did it.

Okay. [indistinct whispers]

What? What is going on?

I don't like this, man.

- Remember, you have three strikes in this maze...

so keep quiet.

- Okay, it's gonna be fine.

It's fine.

It's just a maze.

- Ah! - Aah!

Damn bloody-- [speaking Swedish]

[buzzer]

- That was strike one.

- Okay, I'm not sure if I want to go in there anymore.

- Keep quiet.

- Okay, I'm trying. There's this fucking guy.

- There's more behind you than in front.

- Oh, for fuck's sake.

No! No! - Aah!

- No! Can you stop?

[buzzer] No! No, no, no!

No! No! No! No!

♪ ♪

Not cool, all right?

How will I keep moving?

Oh, thanks. [ghostly scream]

Oh, no! Fuck you!

Fuck you! No, no, no!

Stop this fucking bullshit!

Okay, fuck this maze.

Fuck--aah!

Oh, my God! [buzzer]

Okay! Okay! Okay! Okay! Okay!

Okay! Ah, okay.

I'm out. I'm almost out.

How long does this go?

Stupid maze!

Okay, I got this.

I see some light. [gasps]

Yes! Bro--what?

What the fuck is this?

What?

Why am I here?

Guys, this-- I don't appreciate this.

[loud boom] No!

Hey, how's it going?

Uh, Jesus Christ. All right.

- Welcome to your funeral.

- What the fuck? Yeah, no.

- You failed your first trial.

- No, this is why I wear a helmet.

- Step into your coffin.

- Okay, okay, okay, okay.

- Close the door.

- What the fuck?

Okay.

Uh, see you on the other side.

Okay, this is great.

[coffin creaks] What the fuck?

No!

No! No!

Why did I do this?

Why?

Oh, fuck! Okay, aah!

Let me out! Let me out!

[thuds hitting coffin] Oh!

♪ ♪

[woman screaming] Okay, okay, all right.

This--this is jammed.

Yeah, okay.

[woman screaming]

Oh, fucking hell.

[woman screaming] Stop!

Oh...

[thuds hitting coffin]

Fucking hell.

Okay, all right, this sucks!

I want to go home now!

[woman screaming]

So glad I did this.

So glad I signed up for this fucking shit.

♪ ♪

- Welcome to your next trial,

the meat locker.

- That's a door.

- Once you open the door,

you'll have three more strikes.

Don't go above 80 decibels...

- Okay. - Or else.

- Oh, what the fuck? [buzzer]

- And that was strike one.

- Oh, what the--hello?

- Keep quiet!

- Oh, fucking hell.

Oh, Jesus fucking Christ.

Oh, this is great.

This is just great, isn't it?

Ugh!

Jeez!

Why did I wear a white T-shirt?

- Aah! - Aah! Stop!

Not--okay! Okay! Okay, all right!

All right, jeez!

What? - Aah!

- [shudders] - Aah!

- Okay! Oh, my God! Okay!

Ooh, fuck this so fucking hard!

Okay! Okay! Aah! [buzzer]

They're gonna get me! [screams]

[gasps] [speaking Swedish]

Fuck. Okay, okay.

I'm going.

[gasps] Now, what the fuck?

- That was strike three.

♪ ♪

- Jesus! Aah!

Great little dungeon you got here.

- [screams] - Oh, fucking hell!

Okay, okay, okay, just gonna go.

Yes, this way. Yes!

YouTube!

Oh, for fuck's sake, what is-- okay, okay.

What the fuck is this?

What the fuck?

When does it end?

- Felix, lay on your back.

You have failed your second trial.

You must now face the hardest trial of all.

♪ ♪

Felix? - Uh-huh?

- I'd like you to come to the basement.

- Um, I would not like to come to the basement.

[screams] Oh, what the fuck?

Fuck you! Aah! Oh!

Oh, this is not cool, man!

Are you kidding me right now?

[screams]

Fucking hell.

I can't.

Fucking actually--okay!

♪ ♪

This has gone too fucking far!

[bell dings]

- Felix, it's time to play doctor.

♪ ♪

- But I was enjoying it so much down there.

Aww!

♪ ♪

What the fuck? Why is there blood on me?

Okay, great. This is real nice.

Very nice.

- Be careful getting out.

- I'm so done. God.

Oh, fuck it, man.

♪ ♪

Hey there. Great.

This is my favorite day, guys.

Just fucking fantastic. Jesus.

- There are tools to operate.

Do you see them next to you on your left?

- Um, yes, I do.

- You need to put one of the tools in your right hand

and one in your left.

- All right, fine.

This is fucked up. Okay.

[laughs]

I got the red one and the gray one.

- Now pay attention.

Inside the body cavity, there is a key.

A key will get you out of this trial.

But to find the key, you must remove the organs

one at a time.

- Oh, come on.

That's disgusting.

- If you hit the bones,

there will be a penalty.

- If I hit bones?

Hasn't there been penalties enough?

- The surgery starts now.

[creepy dubstep music blaring]

- [speaking Swedish] What?

Okay, this is not dubstep.

Okay, okay, okay! All right!

Yes, yes.

♪ ♪

Okay, I'm going for this thing!

Ugh! [electricity buzzes]

[screams]

Are you fucking kidding me?

I did not hit a bone!

[woman screams]

♪ ♪

Just a regular Tuesday.

♪ ♪

And I can't fucking hear 'cause it's fucking--

[electricity buzzes] [screams]

Fuck you!

Jesus Christ!

♪ ♪

[woman screaming]

[electricity buzzes] Ah!

Fucking fuck! What did I do?

Jesus!

♪ ♪

I found it! I don't need these.

[music stops]

Yes!

Why didn't you tell me to go in the thing?

- You did well. - Thank you.

- Now pay attention.

Stand right where you are.

You have a key.

There are many doors to the morgue on the wall.

- Oh, come on.

- Hopefully you can find the door

that opens with that key.

You have 15 seconds.

- Oh, come on!

[clock ticking]

I'm just gonna go with--

not having any luck.

[knocking on morgue doors]

Oh, oh, oh, oh!

Yes! Yes! Yes!

Okay, okay, I can't fucking see anything!

What the fuck is this?

- Dude, what's up, man?

Where did you go? We were waiting on you.

Want a pretzel?

What happened? Where'd you go?

- [muttering]

- What's wrong with you? Are you upset?

- You were gonna get me a water.

Where's my water?

- Right here, man.

So the Internet's not working, I guess,

and so the Q&A is gonna-- is busted.

So we're just gonna go home, I guess.

Why do you have a helmet on?

- Look at my fucking back.

- Let me go grab you another shirt--I'll be right back.

- I wouldn't go in there if I were you, but--

- I'll be right back.

- It's fucking fucked up, all right?

I just want to enjoy a pretzel and some water.

- Aah! - Okay, yeah, yeah.

Okay, all right. Guys, this is not--

all right, I'm gonna go.

Been great. See you guys tomorrow.

- [screams] - Oh, no!

Oh, come on! This is--okay.

Wait, I'm pretty sure I did it, all right?

I'm pretty sure I can stop!

Please, can we--no.

I'm done--I'm--

would you like a pretzel?

Here.

[dramatic music]

♪ ♪

All right.

All right, all right, all right.

And another game play done.

- So are you having fun?

- Yeah. - Okay.

- Every day on this fucking show

is just the weirdest day I've experienced.

But I did it, and that was another wrap.

So thank you for watching this one,

and I'll see you hopefully in the next one.

Brofist bump.

No! No!

Why? Oh, fuck--okay, aah!

[woman screaming]

Okay, all right.

I want to go home now!

[woman screaming]

Oh, my God.

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