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00:00:02,089 --> 00:00:05,048
[ "It's the Most Wonderful Time
of the Year" plays ]
2
00:00:07,442 --> 00:00:14,623
♪ It's the most wonderful time
of the year ♪
3
00:00:14,666 --> 00:00:16,625
♪ With the kids jingle belling
4
00:00:16,668 --> 00:00:22,283
♪ And everyone telling you
"Be of good cheer" ♪
5
00:00:22,326 --> 00:00:23,719
Together:Good evening, Mayor!
6
00:00:23,762 --> 00:00:24,937
Hello, boys!
7
00:00:24,981 --> 00:00:26,983
You look dashing
in your top hats.
8
00:00:27,027 --> 00:00:28,811
Check your trouser flap,young man.
9
00:00:30,378 --> 00:00:33,207
I was wide open, guys.
Thanks.
10
00:00:33,250 --> 00:00:39,256
♪ It's the hap-happiest
season of all ♪
11
00:00:39,300 --> 00:00:40,866
You're looking well,
Mayor.
12
00:00:40,910 --> 00:00:42,085
Thank you, butcher.
13
00:00:42,129 --> 00:00:43,304
[ British accent ]
Care for some ham?
14
00:00:43,347 --> 00:00:44,783
No ham for me.
15
00:00:44,827 --> 00:00:46,742
I'm already full
with joy.
16
00:00:47,830 --> 00:00:49,353
Beautiful wreath,
you two!
17
00:00:49,397 --> 00:00:51,703
Much less tacky
than last year.
18
00:00:51,747 --> 00:00:53,314
We're learning.
19
00:00:53,357 --> 00:00:55,185
It's a Douglas fir.
20
00:00:55,229 --> 00:00:56,360
Uhp!
21
00:00:56,404 --> 00:00:59,537
You missed some trash,
waste gatherers.
22
00:00:59,581 --> 00:01:00,799
Yes, Mayor.
23
00:01:00,843 --> 00:01:02,497
This bag
is very wet.
24
00:01:02,540 --> 00:01:04,455
♪ There'll be scary
ghost stories ♪
25
00:01:04,499 --> 00:01:06,370
♪ And tales of the glories
26
00:01:06,414 --> 00:01:11,549
♪ Of Christmases long,
long ago ♪
27
00:01:11,593 --> 00:01:12,811
Ho ho ho,
Mayor Jessica.
28
00:01:12,855 --> 00:01:14,552
Heard you were building us
a new library.
29
00:01:14,596 --> 00:01:16,989
You heard right,
Lao Ban Santa.
30
00:01:18,252 --> 00:01:20,254
♪ There'll be
much mistletoeing ♪
31
00:01:20,297 --> 00:01:21,994
♪ And hearts will be glowing
32
00:01:22,038 --> 00:01:25,128
♪ When loved ones are near
33
00:01:25,172 --> 00:01:28,914
♪ It's the most wonderful time
34
00:01:28,958 --> 00:01:32,962
♪ Of the yeeeeeeeear
35
00:01:33,005 --> 00:01:34,529
Louis:
Uh, Jessica?
36
00:01:34,572 --> 00:01:38,185
Well, look who decided to
finally roll out of bed.
37
00:01:38,228 --> 00:01:39,751
It's 5:00
in the morning.
38
00:01:39,795 --> 00:01:41,362
The day after
Thanksgiving.
39
00:01:41,405 --> 00:01:44,060
I'm still more turkey than man.
Can this wait until later?
40
00:01:44,104 --> 00:01:47,150
No. Jessica Town
is in full swing.
41
00:01:47,194 --> 00:01:49,196
The Christmas season
has officially begun,
42
00:01:49,239 --> 00:01:50,806
and there's no time
to waste.
43
00:01:50,849 --> 00:01:52,764
[ Sighs ]
44
00:01:52,808 --> 00:01:54,375
Eddie, your pajama flap
is open.
45
00:01:54,418 --> 00:01:56,246
I know.
46
00:01:56,290 --> 00:01:58,335
--Captions by VITAC--
47
00:01:58,379 --> 00:01:59,728
♪ Fresh off the boat
48
00:01:59,771 --> 00:02:01,425
♪ I'm gettin' mine
everywhere I go ♪
49
00:02:01,469 --> 00:02:03,601
♪ If you don't know, homey,
now you know ♪
50
00:02:03,645 --> 00:02:05,037
♪ Fresh off the boat
51
00:02:05,081 --> 00:02:07,301
♪ Homey, you don't know
where I come from ♪
52
00:02:07,344 --> 00:02:08,650
♪ But I know where I'm goin'
53
00:02:08,693 --> 00:02:10,217
♪ I'm fresh off the boat
54
00:02:12,349 --> 00:02:13,307
Mmm.
55
00:02:13,350 --> 00:02:14,873
Thanksgiving leftovers
are the best.
56
00:02:14,917 --> 00:02:17,528
You guys should have tasted my
pancakes with turkey gravy.
57
00:02:17,572 --> 00:02:20,096
Why would --
He's a human sewer.
58
00:02:21,619 --> 00:02:24,405
Ooh. Our community parkis building an ice rinkfor the holidays.
59
00:02:24,448 --> 00:02:27,364
Ice skating in Florida --what an era.
60
00:02:27,408 --> 00:02:28,539
We should go together.
61
00:02:28,583 --> 00:02:30,411
We haven't gonesince the boys were born.
62
00:02:30,454 --> 00:02:32,674
Louis, it's 1999.
63
00:02:32,717 --> 00:02:35,198
It's the last Christmas
of the century --
64
00:02:35,242 --> 00:02:37,113
no, the millennium.
65
00:02:37,157 --> 00:02:39,202
It has to be perfect.
66
00:02:39,246 --> 00:02:42,640
I'm marking the occasion
with a stunning monument --
67
00:02:42,684 --> 00:02:45,252
a life-size gingerbread
house on our lawn.
68
00:02:45,295 --> 00:02:47,036
Take a look
at my prototype.
69
00:02:48,385 --> 00:02:51,606
Behold the flawless
candy-cane gutters.
70
00:02:52,955 --> 00:02:54,565
Although, they'll be a bitch
to clean once the leaves fall.
71
00:02:54,609 --> 00:02:57,568
Jessica, instead of addingto your list of holiday tasks,
72
00:02:57,612 --> 00:02:59,048
you should be
subtracting.
73
00:02:59,091 --> 00:03:01,224
We lose you forthe whole month of December.
74
00:03:01,268 --> 00:03:03,444
Well, people expect a lot
from me at Christmas.
75
00:03:03,487 --> 00:03:05,576
My cards,
my caroling solos,
76
00:03:05,620 --> 00:03:07,883
the boys with their unique
Christmas requests.
77
00:03:07,926 --> 00:03:10,451
Hey, boys, what do you wantfor Christmas this year?
78
00:03:10,494 --> 00:03:11,452
Together: Gift card.
79
00:03:11,495 --> 00:03:12,453
See?
80
00:03:12,496 --> 00:03:14,063
It gets simpler nowthat they're getting older.
81
00:03:14,106 --> 00:03:15,673
Let's go skating.
82
00:03:15,717 --> 00:03:17,066
What if I get hurt
on the ice?
83
00:03:17,109 --> 00:03:19,634
What if somebody slams into me,
breaking my bones?
84
00:03:19,677 --> 00:03:21,462
Come on. Your skeleton?Strong.
85
00:03:21,505 --> 00:03:23,246
Can't risk it.
Who would do all my work?
86
00:03:23,290 --> 00:03:25,379
The holiday perfection
I've become famous for
87
00:03:25,422 --> 00:03:26,380
would be ruined.
88
00:03:26,423 --> 00:03:27,729
Oh, I got to run.
89
00:03:27,772 --> 00:03:29,121
Tinsel goes
on sale today,
90
00:03:29,165 --> 00:03:32,212
and I refuse to buy any
that's already been touched.
91
00:03:33,387 --> 00:03:36,868
Oh, no.Look at that huge bear.
92
00:03:36,912 --> 00:03:39,131
Quick!
Drop the salmon and --
93
00:03:39,175 --> 00:03:40,481
Ugh.
Read me in again.
94
00:03:40,524 --> 00:03:41,525
Ugh.
95
00:03:41,569 --> 00:03:42,874
Evan, go from your line
about the river.
96
00:03:42,918 --> 00:03:45,877
Stop whining.
Emery needs our help.
97
00:03:45,921 --> 00:03:47,096
Thanks, Grandma.
98
00:03:47,139 --> 00:03:48,315
Let's go findsomewhere else to rehearse.
99
00:03:48,358 --> 00:03:52,101
It should always be
about the family.
100
00:03:52,144 --> 00:03:55,496
Just like in this play,
"Wyoming Family."
101
00:03:55,539 --> 00:03:58,368
♪♪
102
00:03:58,412 --> 00:04:00,414
Way to tank those linesso we could get out of this.
103
00:04:00,457 --> 00:04:01,850
[ Door opens ]Smart.
104
00:04:01,893 --> 00:04:03,721
Going through the motions.
That's my thing.
105
00:04:03,765 --> 00:04:05,636
Hey, guys.
106
00:04:05,680 --> 00:04:08,509
Do you mind hiding
my Christmas gift for Marvin?
107
00:04:08,552 --> 00:04:10,554
All he does
is snoop for presents,
108
00:04:10,598 --> 00:04:11,729
and I'd feel better
if I kept it here.
109
00:04:11,773 --> 00:04:14,950
Sure, Honey.
What'd you get him?
110
00:04:14,993 --> 00:04:19,389
It's...a maritime
nutcracker.
111
00:04:19,433 --> 00:04:21,870
[ Chuckles ] It combines
his three favorite things --
112
00:04:21,913 --> 00:04:23,350
snacks, the Navy,
and wood.
113
00:04:23,393 --> 00:04:24,960
I'll be back later
to wrap it.
114
00:04:25,003 --> 00:04:26,527
Thank you.
115
00:04:26,570 --> 00:04:28,355
[ Door opens, closes ]There's no way
this dude can crack a nut.
116
00:04:28,398 --> 00:04:31,358
You'd be surprised by the amountof force a lever can generate.
117
00:04:31,401 --> 00:04:32,402
It's physics.
118
00:04:32,446 --> 00:04:33,751
Nerd, please.
119
00:04:33,795 --> 00:04:35,579
Are you doubting me?
120
00:04:35,623 --> 00:04:37,189
Take this pistachio.
121
00:04:39,366 --> 00:04:41,803
See? Formidable --like Mom's skeleton.
122
00:04:41,846 --> 00:04:44,936
Now, let's add a lever
to the equation.
123
00:04:44,980 --> 00:04:47,591
[ Festive music plays ]
124
00:04:47,635 --> 00:04:49,463
[ Laughs ]
Awesome.
125
00:04:49,506 --> 00:04:50,725
Levers.
126
00:04:50,768 --> 00:04:52,379
Let's go bigger.
127
00:04:52,422 --> 00:04:55,164
Now you're talking.There's no stoppin' us now.
128
00:04:55,207 --> 00:04:56,774
[ Music slows, stops ]
129
00:04:56,818 --> 00:04:58,123
[ Sighs ]
We pushed him too far.
130
00:04:58,167 --> 00:04:59,386
It was the jawbreaker.
131
00:04:59,429 --> 00:05:01,213
It says itright in the damn name.
132
00:05:01,257 --> 00:05:02,606
Relax, bro.
133
00:05:02,650 --> 00:05:03,912
We'll replace it
before Honey finds out.
134
00:05:03,955 --> 00:05:05,000
How much could it cost?
135
00:05:06,654 --> 00:05:09,221
"Handmade in Germanyby real Germans."
136
00:05:09,265 --> 00:05:11,398
[ Gasps ]
It's $400!
137
00:05:11,441 --> 00:05:13,791
Why does Germany always
have to go over the top?
138
00:05:16,533 --> 00:05:18,622
Are those
my Christmas cards?
139
00:05:18,666 --> 00:05:19,928
Emery:
Dad did them for you.
140
00:05:19,971 --> 00:05:22,147
He seemed happy to use
the rest of his tuba stamps.
141
00:05:22,191 --> 00:05:24,846
Went on a big rant about postagegoing up again next year.
142
00:05:24,889 --> 00:05:27,501
Tubas don'trepresent Christmas.
143
00:05:27,544 --> 00:05:28,502
[ Sighs ]
144
00:05:28,545 --> 00:05:31,243
And he scribbled
the addresses.
145
00:05:31,287 --> 00:05:33,550
Where's the elegant
calligraphy?
146
00:05:33,594 --> 00:05:36,597
Stupid tuba hippo.
147
00:05:36,640 --> 00:05:39,251
[ Festive music plays ]
148
00:05:39,295 --> 00:05:40,514
[ Music distorts ]
149
00:05:40,557 --> 00:05:42,516
[ Polka music plays ]
150
00:05:42,559 --> 00:05:45,954
What in the name of Lao Ban?
151
00:05:45,997 --> 00:05:48,043
Hey!
What are you guys going?
152
00:05:48,086 --> 00:05:50,219
We decided
to change things up.
153
00:05:50,262 --> 00:05:52,830
Yeah. The butcher
gave us the idea.Mm-hmm.
154
00:05:52,874 --> 00:05:53,962
[ Chuckles ]
155
00:05:54,005 --> 00:05:56,399
How about this sassy brass?
156
00:05:56,443 --> 00:05:58,140
[ Chuckles ]
157
00:06:01,361 --> 00:06:02,884
[ Sighs ]
I'm out of cash.
158
00:06:02,927 --> 00:06:05,452
I spent it on Tina's gift --a brown weave belt.
159
00:06:05,495 --> 00:06:07,584
The whole thing
is belt holes.
160
00:06:07,628 --> 00:06:08,759
How 'bout you?
161
00:06:08,803 --> 00:06:10,065
I've got nothing.
162
00:06:10,108 --> 00:06:12,197
All my extra money
is tied up in mutual funds.
163
00:06:12,241 --> 00:06:14,548
We don't have
anywhere close to $400
164
00:06:14,591 --> 00:06:15,462
to buy a new nutcracker.
165
00:06:15,505 --> 00:06:17,333
We have to tell Honey
what happened.
166
00:06:17,377 --> 00:06:19,901
And risk getting in trouble andlosing our Christmas gift cards?
167
00:06:19,944 --> 00:06:21,903
I'm spending mineon a certificate to Taco Bell
168
00:06:21,946 --> 00:06:24,340
so I can crush tacos
whenever I want.
169
00:06:24,384 --> 00:06:27,430
Wait, you're using a gift card
to buy a gift card?
170
00:06:27,474 --> 00:06:28,692
You've got to spend moneyto make money.
171
00:06:28,736 --> 00:06:30,215
We're not telling Honey.
172
00:06:30,259 --> 00:06:31,216
We'll just do
what I always do
173
00:06:31,260 --> 00:06:33,088
when I make a mistake --cover it up.
174
00:06:33,131 --> 00:06:36,091
I don't know.
Sounds delinquent.
175
00:06:36,134 --> 00:06:39,355
Sure. My way sometimes getsmessy, but it always works out.
176
00:06:39,399 --> 00:06:41,313
I've broken plenty of thingsand never gotten caught.
177
00:06:41,357 --> 00:06:43,315
You think that'syour original watch?
178
00:06:44,273 --> 00:06:47,058
That watch was a birthday gift
from my pen pal in Ecuador.
179
00:06:47,102 --> 00:06:48,538
Well, this one's
from Sears.
180
00:06:48,582 --> 00:06:50,888
I don't know.
Seems wrong.
181
00:06:50,932 --> 00:06:53,804
Evan, think aboutall the stress confessingwould cause everyone.
182
00:06:53,848 --> 00:06:56,894
Honey? Mom?
183
00:06:56,938 --> 00:06:58,679
You want to
ruin Christmas?
184
00:06:58,722 --> 00:07:00,637
[ Sighs ]
Okay.
185
00:07:00,681 --> 00:07:01,943
Let's do it your way.
186
00:07:03,510 --> 00:07:05,860
Also, what happened
to my old watch?
187
00:07:05,903 --> 00:07:08,079
Long story short,it's in Trent's dog.
188
00:07:10,386 --> 00:07:11,474
Oh, hey.
189
00:07:11,518 --> 00:07:13,911
You see how I, uh, knocked out
all the Christmas cards?
190
00:07:13,955 --> 00:07:15,565
I sure did.
191
00:07:15,609 --> 00:07:17,611
Great. Then let's lace upsome steel and hit the rink.
192
00:07:17,654 --> 00:07:18,612
I packed some singles,
193
00:07:18,655 --> 00:07:21,049
so maybe we can tip our wayinto a Zamboni ride.
194
00:07:21,092 --> 00:07:22,354
No Zamboni.
195
00:07:22,398 --> 00:07:25,967
I have to stay and fix
everything you did wrong.
196
00:07:27,403 --> 00:07:28,709
[ Smooches ]
197
00:07:28,752 --> 00:07:30,058
I seal each one
with a kiss.
198
00:07:30,101 --> 00:07:31,886
Nobody knows,
but I know.
199
00:07:31,929 --> 00:07:33,931
Okay.
200
00:07:33,975 --> 00:07:35,367
I think you're
going overboard.
201
00:07:35,411 --> 00:07:37,674
I think you should leave
Christmas to the professionals.
202
00:07:37,718 --> 00:07:39,110
You thought I had
little time before?
203
00:07:39,154 --> 00:07:40,547
Now I have
no time at all.
204
00:07:40,590 --> 00:07:42,853
I mean, look at
this calligraphy.
205
00:07:42,897 --> 00:07:45,290
It could have come
straight from the Vatican.
206
00:07:45,334 --> 00:07:46,770
[ Exhales sharply ]
207
00:07:50,252 --> 00:07:53,168
You're redoing theenvelopes just becauseI used the wrong stamps?
208
00:07:53,211 --> 00:07:55,300
I don't see what
the big deal is.
209
00:07:55,344 --> 00:07:57,738
My Christmas cards
kick off the holiday season,
210
00:07:57,781 --> 00:08:00,175
and everyone expects
perfection from me.
211
00:08:00,218 --> 00:08:03,221
Okay, I knew you wereparticular about Christmas --
212
00:08:03,265 --> 00:08:04,527
Particular?
213
00:08:04,571 --> 00:08:06,703
I've been fine-tuning
the details for years.
214
00:08:06,747 --> 00:08:08,444
I don't improvise.
215
00:08:08,488 --> 00:08:12,317
This is Christmas,
not some sleazy jazz concert.
216
00:08:12,361 --> 00:08:13,318
Understood.
I just didn't know
217
00:08:13,362 --> 00:08:15,016
it went all the way downto envelopes.
218
00:08:15,059 --> 00:08:16,321
But now that I know,I can help out,
219
00:08:16,365 --> 00:08:17,584
and then we can go skating.
220
00:08:17,627 --> 00:08:19,542
I don't think
that's a good idea.
221
00:08:19,586 --> 00:08:21,544
Let's see -- stockings needhanging, wine needs mulling.
222
00:08:21,588 --> 00:08:23,764
[ Scoffs ] Come on.How hard could it really be?
223
00:08:23,807 --> 00:08:24,765
Okay.
You want to help?
224
00:08:24,808 --> 00:08:26,680
You just drew
gingerbread house.
225
00:08:26,723 --> 00:08:28,203
♪♪
226
00:08:28,246 --> 00:08:29,770
What? But that's
your showstopper.
227
00:08:29,813 --> 00:08:31,423
Well, you said
all this was easy, right?
228
00:08:31,467 --> 00:08:33,556
The grand unveiling is set
for the end of the week.
229
00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:35,036
It's B-Y-O-E-N.
230
00:08:36,080 --> 00:08:38,126
Bring your own eggnog.
231
00:08:38,169 --> 00:08:39,736
Oh.
232
00:08:41,521 --> 00:08:42,739
You want me to work at the mall
as a Christmas elf?
233
00:08:42,783 --> 00:08:44,132
Eddie: Yep.
234
00:08:44,175 --> 00:08:45,916
All you got to do
is fill out that application.
235
00:08:45,960 --> 00:08:47,222
Under
emergency contact,
236
00:08:47,265 --> 00:08:49,354
put Cindy Crawford.
See what happens.
237
00:08:49,398 --> 00:08:51,443
Why would I ever
want to do this?
238
00:08:52,836 --> 00:08:55,709
Well, for starters,
it'll help your acting career.
239
00:08:55,752 --> 00:08:58,407
Think of all the great
character work that you'd do.
240
00:08:58,450 --> 00:09:00,714
I heard that "The Mummy's"
very own Brendan Fraser
241
00:09:00,757 --> 00:09:02,193
got his start as a mall elf.
242
00:09:02,237 --> 00:09:03,804
You'll also get
a 30% mall discount
243
00:09:03,847 --> 00:09:04,718
that we can all share.
244
00:09:04,761 --> 00:09:06,502
Think about it.
245
00:09:06,546 --> 00:09:08,069
Just like that,
a $400 Christmas gift
246
00:09:08,112 --> 00:09:09,723
becomes $280.
[ Snaps fingers ]
247
00:09:09,766 --> 00:09:12,160
You broke Honey's nutcracker,
didn't you?
248
00:09:12,203 --> 00:09:13,770
It was his quick math,wasn't it?
249
00:09:13,814 --> 00:09:15,076
Fine.
We broke it.
250
00:09:15,119 --> 00:09:16,730
But even with my job
at Cattleman's,
251
00:09:16,773 --> 00:09:18,949
we still can't afford
to buy a new one.
252
00:09:18,993 --> 00:09:20,647
And I don't meet the age
253
00:09:20,690 --> 00:09:21,865
and height requirementsfor elf duty,
254
00:09:21,909 --> 00:09:24,607
which feels backwards,but hey, rules are rules.
255
00:09:24,651 --> 00:09:27,523
Sorry, guys,
but this isn't my fight.
256
00:09:27,567 --> 00:09:28,524
Wait.
257
00:09:28,568 --> 00:09:29,525
What about
what Grandma said
258
00:09:29,569 --> 00:09:30,744
about doing things
for the family?
259
00:09:30,787 --> 00:09:32,963
Come on, Emery.
Your brothers are down.
260
00:09:33,007 --> 00:09:34,704
It's Christmas.
Help us out.
261
00:09:34,748 --> 00:09:35,662
For the family.
262
00:09:35,705 --> 00:09:38,316
Okay.
For the family.
263
00:09:38,360 --> 00:09:39,317
My man!
264
00:09:39,361 --> 00:09:40,754
Hey,
while you're there,
265
00:09:40,797 --> 00:09:42,494
do you mind putting in
a good word for me with Santa?
266
00:09:42,538 --> 00:09:44,322
It's been a real
up-and-down year for me.
267
00:09:45,672 --> 00:09:47,499
How's it coming?
268
00:09:47,543 --> 00:09:49,501
Awfully messy.
269
00:09:49,545 --> 00:09:50,807
Well, it's this
damn frosting.
270
00:09:50,851 --> 00:09:53,549
It's basically concrete --
solidifies instantly.
271
00:09:53,593 --> 00:09:55,856
[ Sighs ] Doesn't bode wellfor the real thing.
272
00:09:55,899 --> 00:09:56,900
Maybe I should take over.
273
00:09:56,944 --> 00:09:58,119
Nope. I've got it.
274
00:09:58,162 --> 00:10:00,251
Um, quick question --
I ate a lot of this.
275
00:10:00,295 --> 00:10:01,557
How worried should I be?
276
00:10:05,779 --> 00:10:06,823
Thank you all for coming.
277
00:10:06,867 --> 00:10:09,521
It is good to show interest
in your local government,
278
00:10:09,565 --> 00:10:11,088
even though this isn't
a democracy.
279
00:10:11,132 --> 00:10:13,525
The butcher's influenceis spreading,
280
00:10:13,569 --> 00:10:16,224
first with the tuba musicand then with the ugly signs.
281
00:10:16,267 --> 00:10:17,878
Yeah, and then you reward him
with a contract
282
00:10:17,921 --> 00:10:19,706
to build
our new library?
[ Scoffs ]
283
00:10:19,749 --> 00:10:20,794
Yes, our beautiful new library
284
00:10:20,837 --> 00:10:22,056
that will be filled
with only one book --
285
00:10:22,099 --> 00:10:23,274
my novel -- yes.
286
00:10:23,318 --> 00:10:25,276
Oh! This is too much
for a meat vendor!
287
00:10:25,320 --> 00:10:28,540
Exactly. Once that simple
butcher sees how hard it is,
288
00:10:28,584 --> 00:10:30,847
he'll quit,
and then I, your mayor,
289
00:10:30,891 --> 00:10:32,544
will come in and save the day.
290
00:10:32,588 --> 00:10:34,808
But what if
he pulls it off?
291
00:10:34,851 --> 00:10:36,723
Please.
That would take a miracle.
292
00:10:36,766 --> 00:10:38,812
We live in a town where
it's Christmas year-round.
293
00:10:38,855 --> 00:10:40,814
Miracles happen
all the time.
294
00:10:40,857 --> 00:10:43,338
[ Townspeople murmur ]
295
00:10:44,556 --> 00:10:46,384
Big shift
at Cattleman's today.
296
00:10:46,428 --> 00:10:47,908
Sold a guy some ribs...Evan: Mm.
297
00:10:47,951 --> 00:10:49,300
...and my socks.
Ugh.
298
00:10:49,344 --> 00:10:50,737
What?
You know what?
299
00:10:50,780 --> 00:10:51,825
We need money.
I don't want to know.
300
00:10:51,868 --> 00:10:52,826
[ Bells jingling ]
301
00:10:52,869 --> 00:10:54,566
Eddie: There he is.
302
00:10:54,610 --> 00:10:56,699
How was your first dayat work, champ?
303
00:10:56,743 --> 00:10:57,831
It was awful.
304
00:10:57,874 --> 00:10:59,920
Elfing's the worst.
305
00:10:59,963 --> 00:11:01,704
Awful, like,
in a good way?
306
00:11:01,748 --> 00:11:04,272
There was an endless line
of people, parents shoving,
307
00:11:04,315 --> 00:11:05,316
babies crying.
308
00:11:05,360 --> 00:11:07,405
And Santa's no picnic,
either.
309
00:11:07,449 --> 00:11:09,756
"Hey, elf!
I said skimmilk."
310
00:11:09,799 --> 00:11:11,801
[ Sighs ] Emery,this sounds terrible.
311
00:11:11,845 --> 00:11:13,411
Emery?
Who's Emery?
312
00:11:13,455 --> 00:11:15,631
My name's Jingles now.
313
00:11:15,675 --> 00:11:16,937
I'm gonna go to bed.
314
00:11:16,980 --> 00:11:18,721
I hate myself.
315
00:11:18,765 --> 00:11:19,940
[ Bells jingling ]
316
00:11:19,983 --> 00:11:22,769
We can't let him
go back there.
317
00:11:22,812 --> 00:11:24,945
Hey, this is what yousigned up for, remember?
318
00:11:24,988 --> 00:11:27,948
You knew my way could get messy,but it works.
319
00:11:27,991 --> 00:11:32,735
If Santa's drinking skim,what chance do any of us have?
320
00:11:34,041 --> 00:11:36,391
So, we got to make this,
but life-size?
321
00:11:36,434 --> 00:11:38,523
She's got a rain shower
in the half-bath.
322
00:11:38,567 --> 00:11:39,786
You don't make anything easy,
do you, boss?
323
00:11:39,829 --> 00:11:41,918
I give you three daysof vacation a year.
324
00:11:41,962 --> 00:11:43,093
That's pretty easy.
325
00:11:43,137 --> 00:11:45,922
And I'm easy on the eyes.That's two easys.
326
00:11:45,966 --> 00:11:47,097
How come you
stopped screaming
327
00:11:47,141 --> 00:11:48,795
and banging your head
against the walls?
328
00:11:48,838 --> 00:11:49,970
Is everything okay?
329
00:11:50,013 --> 00:11:51,928
Everything's great.Some might say easy.
330
00:11:51,972 --> 00:11:53,321
Whoa.
That's three.
331
00:11:53,364 --> 00:11:54,844
[ Sniffs ]
What's that smell?
332
00:11:54,888 --> 00:11:56,324
We got some fresh gingerbreadcooking in the oven --
333
00:11:56,367 --> 00:11:57,586
homemade recipe.
334
00:11:57,629 --> 00:11:59,240
Trent's gonna help me startthrowing up some walls.
335
00:11:59,283 --> 00:12:02,634
Oh, my God.
It's a Christmas miracle.
336
00:12:02,678 --> 00:12:04,245
I told you. It's not that hard.Anyone could do it.
337
00:12:04,288 --> 00:12:05,681
Really?
338
00:12:05,725 --> 00:12:08,553
So, then you'd be okay if
I moved the unveiling up to,
339
00:12:08,597 --> 00:12:09,685
say, tomorrow?
340
00:12:09,729 --> 00:12:11,774
Give the neighborhood
a few extra days
341
00:12:11,818 --> 00:12:13,210
to enjoy your handiwork.
342
00:12:13,254 --> 00:12:14,908
Uh, tomorrow?
343
00:12:14,951 --> 00:12:16,910
That's, like,
one day from now.
344
00:12:16,953 --> 00:12:17,824
Oh, unless you
can't handle it?
345
00:12:19,042 --> 00:12:20,043
Nope. We've got it.
[ Chuckles ]
346
00:12:20,087 --> 00:12:22,002
If we can handle CatfishWednesdays at Cattleman's,
347
00:12:22,045 --> 00:12:23,438
we could handle anything.
348
00:12:23,481 --> 00:12:24,656
I'm sure you can.
349
00:12:24,700 --> 00:12:26,963
I can't wait to see
how your homemade recipe
350
00:12:27,007 --> 00:12:31,272
accounts for Florida's
relentless swamp humidity.
351
00:12:31,315 --> 00:12:32,795
[ Sighs ]
352
00:12:32,839 --> 00:12:34,884
I'll be honest, boss --
no way this gingerbread house
353
00:12:34,928 --> 00:12:36,059
can be built by tomorrow.
354
00:12:36,103 --> 00:12:38,714
And I say that as a ginger
myself -- one who eats bread.
355
00:12:38,758 --> 00:12:40,498
[ Sighs ]
356
00:12:40,542 --> 00:12:41,848
♪♪
357
00:12:41,891 --> 00:12:44,067
Alright, bro.
You loose?
358
00:12:44,111 --> 00:12:45,155
Need another Tic Tac?
359
00:12:45,199 --> 00:12:46,853
I can't go back
out there.
360
00:12:48,245 --> 00:12:50,073
It's almost over.
361
00:12:50,117 --> 00:12:51,466
I'm picking up another shiftat Cattleman's,
362
00:12:51,509 --> 00:12:54,034
and Evan's closing a dealright now as we speak.
363
00:12:54,077 --> 00:12:55,862
We're all in this
together.
364
00:12:55,905 --> 00:12:56,906
For the family.
365
00:12:56,950 --> 00:12:58,255
For the family.
366
00:12:58,299 --> 00:13:00,867
Now go out there and throwsome kids in that old man's lap.
367
00:13:03,347 --> 00:13:06,046
Hello, good sir.
Nice location.
368
00:13:06,089 --> 00:13:08,918
Donations for the Toys for Totsbin are right over there.
369
00:13:10,702 --> 00:13:13,444
No, I'm actually here to trade
for one of your nutcrackers.
370
00:13:13,488 --> 00:13:14,968
Sorry, kid.
Cash only.
371
00:13:15,011 --> 00:13:17,100
[ Sighs ]
372
00:13:17,144 --> 00:13:20,756
♪♪
373
00:13:20,800 --> 00:13:23,063
Hey, Evan!
What are you doing here?
374
00:13:23,106 --> 00:13:25,108
I'm allowed to be here!What are you doing here?!
375
00:13:25,152 --> 00:13:27,763
Uh -- Wh-- Marvin foundthe stocking stuffers I got him,
376
00:13:27,807 --> 00:13:29,983
so I just had to come get
some aftershave.
377
00:13:30,026 --> 00:13:31,985
Thank God you guys
are hiding his main gift.
378
00:13:32,028 --> 00:13:35,075
You are gonna make
his Christmas morning.
379
00:13:35,118 --> 00:13:36,337
You knowthe Huang brothers --
380
00:13:36,380 --> 00:13:38,992
always dependable,
rock steady.
381
00:13:39,035 --> 00:13:40,645
Oh, well, someone
should tell Emery that,
382
00:13:40,689 --> 00:13:42,473
because that kid
is in pieces.
383
00:13:42,517 --> 00:13:44,911
[ Children screaming ]
384
00:13:44,954 --> 00:13:47,087
I just saw him wiping his tears
with a paper snowflake.
385
00:13:47,130 --> 00:13:50,090
Anyway, I will come by later
to wrap that gift.
386
00:13:50,133 --> 00:13:52,092
♪♪
387
00:13:52,135 --> 00:13:55,008
[ Indistinct chatter ]
388
00:13:55,051 --> 00:13:58,533
♪♪
389
00:13:58,576 --> 00:14:01,318
[ Echoing indistinct chatter ]
390
00:14:01,362 --> 00:14:03,277
[ Heartbeat ]
391
00:14:06,193 --> 00:14:09,109
How'd it go with
the Beanie Babies?
392
00:14:09,152 --> 00:14:10,240
Fine.
It went fine.
393
00:14:10,284 --> 00:14:12,286
Emery doesn't have to workas an elf anymore.
394
00:14:12,329 --> 00:14:14,244
Really?
That's great news!
395
00:14:14,288 --> 00:14:15,550
So, how much did you
get for them?
396
00:14:15,593 --> 00:14:17,552
Is this a "pizza's on Evan"
situation?
397
00:14:19,206 --> 00:14:20,468
I stole
the nutcracker!
398
00:14:20,511 --> 00:14:21,861
Aah!
I'm too pretty for jail!
399
00:14:22,992 --> 00:14:27,040
♪♪
400
00:14:27,083 --> 00:14:29,520
This is one
high-class garland.
401
00:14:29,564 --> 00:14:33,002
Gar-land is where
Garfield is from.
402
00:14:33,046 --> 00:14:34,525
Louis: Jessica! Hurry!
I need you!
403
00:14:34,569 --> 00:14:37,833
I knew he didn't
have it in him.
404
00:14:37,877 --> 00:14:40,140
Wow.
405
00:14:40,183 --> 00:14:43,012
It's worse
than I thought.
406
00:14:43,056 --> 00:14:44,057
It's perfect.
407
00:14:44,100 --> 00:14:45,623
Perfect?
408
00:14:45,667 --> 00:14:47,974
This looks like a place wheregingerbread men go to O.D.
409
00:14:48,017 --> 00:14:50,280
[ Chuckles ]
No way.
410
00:14:50,324 --> 00:14:53,980
No, it represents the humble
spirit of Christmas --
411
00:14:54,023 --> 00:14:57,026
before everything became
so over-the-top.
412
00:14:57,070 --> 00:14:58,941
Well, as tempting as it looks,
don't take a bite.
413
00:14:58,985 --> 00:15:00,551
It's all nails.
414
00:15:00,595 --> 00:15:02,075
Everyone loves
Louis' idea.
415
00:15:02,118 --> 00:15:03,424
Scaling back.
416
00:15:03,467 --> 00:15:05,861
Simple.
Genius.
417
00:15:08,342 --> 00:15:10,170
[ Polka music plays ]Honey:
I'm loving this music!
418
00:15:10,213 --> 00:15:11,736
And I'm loving
this clapping!
419
00:15:11,780 --> 00:15:13,042
[ Laughs ]
420
00:15:13,086 --> 00:15:14,957
Constable Bryson,
421
00:15:15,001 --> 00:15:17,351
arrest those two
for disorderly conduct.
422
00:15:17,394 --> 00:15:18,961
[ Irish accent ]Sorry, ma'am, but you no longer
423
00:15:19,005 --> 00:15:20,658
have that kind of authority.
424
00:15:20,702 --> 00:15:22,747
You're not
the mayor anymore.
425
00:15:22,791 --> 00:15:24,880
What? Well, if I'm not,
then who is?
426
00:15:27,143 --> 00:15:28,623
I give you...
427
00:15:28,666 --> 00:15:30,407
your new library.
428
00:15:30,451 --> 00:15:33,062
What about all the money that'ssupposed to make it look nice?
429
00:15:33,106 --> 00:15:34,890
I used it to build
an ice rink.
430
00:15:34,934 --> 00:15:36,631
[ Cheers and applause ]
431
00:15:36,674 --> 00:15:38,459
Yes!
432
00:15:42,202 --> 00:15:44,378
I'll admit, the time crunchhad me nervous.
433
00:15:44,421 --> 00:15:45,857
Couldn't get to all the bellsand whistles,
434
00:15:45,901 --> 00:15:48,077
but people love it.
435
00:15:48,121 --> 00:15:50,471
Thanks, Louis.
You ruined my Christmas.
436
00:15:52,168 --> 00:15:55,084
Hey, you really should
get onto to this nog, Lou.
437
00:15:55,128 --> 00:15:57,260
[ Door opens, closes ]It's only 2,000 calories
a glass.
438
00:15:57,304 --> 00:15:58,696
[ Slurps ]
439
00:15:58,740 --> 00:16:00,263
[ Gulps, exhales sharply ]
440
00:16:04,050 --> 00:16:06,400
♪♪
441
00:16:06,443 --> 00:16:09,446
Um...what are you doing
to my sit-down hairdryer?
442
00:16:09,490 --> 00:16:12,928
Making a joke out of somethingyou love, like you did to me.
443
00:16:12,972 --> 00:16:15,278
Jessica, I thought you'd behappy with my gingerbread house.
444
00:16:15,322 --> 00:16:16,932
Please.
445
00:16:16,976 --> 00:16:18,412
You built a shack.
446
00:16:18,455 --> 00:16:21,197
Look, I know it's not
Princess Jasmine's
Arabian fortress,
447
00:16:21,241 --> 00:16:22,851
but everyone loves it.
448
00:16:22,894 --> 00:16:24,722
Isn't that all
that matters?
449
00:16:24,766 --> 00:16:26,072
Christmas is my holiday.
450
00:16:26,115 --> 00:16:27,856
It has to be perfect.
451
00:16:27,899 --> 00:16:31,642
Not quickly pushed through,not scaled back -- perfect.
452
00:16:31,686 --> 00:16:33,905
Well, you know what a perfect
Christmas is to me?
453
00:16:33,949 --> 00:16:35,124
Spending time with you.
454
00:16:36,691 --> 00:16:38,171
The chair
looks beautiful.
455
00:16:38,214 --> 00:16:42,175
♪♪
456
00:16:43,306 --> 00:16:44,960
What came over you, man?
457
00:16:45,004 --> 00:16:47,136
I've never stolenanything in my life --
458
00:16:47,180 --> 00:16:50,052
I mean, a few hearts, sure,but never a piece of property.
459
00:16:50,096 --> 00:16:51,271
Shh!
Lower your voice.
460
00:16:51,314 --> 00:16:52,272
[ Gunfire on TV ]
461
00:16:52,315 --> 00:16:53,316
She's watching
"Die Hard."
462
00:16:53,360 --> 00:16:54,883
If Bruce Willis is on TV,
463
00:16:54,926 --> 00:16:56,624
the rest of the worldfades away.
464
00:16:56,667 --> 00:16:58,843
Yippee-ki-ay![ Glass shatters]
465
00:16:58,887 --> 00:16:59,931
I don't know what happened
back there.
466
00:16:59,975 --> 00:17:02,543
I saw the nutcracker.
Honey showed up.
467
00:17:02,586 --> 00:17:03,761
Emery was crying.
468
00:17:03,805 --> 00:17:05,633
Next thing you know,
I'm outside the mall.
469
00:17:05,676 --> 00:17:07,200
It's like I blacked out.
470
00:17:07,243 --> 00:17:08,418
This is really hard-core.
471
00:17:08,462 --> 00:17:10,638
Now we're sitting ona hot nutcracker.
472
00:17:10,681 --> 00:17:11,682
I'm gonna have to go
on the run.
473
00:17:11,726 --> 00:17:12,857
Start a new life.
474
00:17:12,901 --> 00:17:14,772
This is all my fault.
475
00:17:14,816 --> 00:17:16,905
I was the one who pushed youto do things my way.
476
00:17:16,948 --> 00:17:18,950
You never told me
to steal, Eddie.
477
00:17:18,994 --> 00:17:20,909
We should have just told Honey,like you said.
478
00:17:20,952 --> 00:17:22,258
Well,
it's too late now.
479
00:17:22,302 --> 00:17:23,651
I'll have to wear
a fake mustache
480
00:17:23,694 --> 00:17:25,131
until I can grow one
on my own.
481
00:17:25,174 --> 00:17:26,306
Let's just...
482
00:17:26,349 --> 00:17:28,134
return the nutcrackerand come clean to Honey.
483
00:17:28,177 --> 00:17:30,223
We're gonna be in
so much trouble.
No.
484
00:17:30,266 --> 00:17:32,007
I'm taking all the blame.
485
00:17:32,051 --> 00:17:33,356
What about
the consequences?
486
00:17:33,400 --> 00:17:34,662
Your Christmas gift card?
487
00:17:34,705 --> 00:17:36,011
Yeah, I know.
488
00:17:36,055 --> 00:17:38,448
I'm really hoping this scoresme some points with Santa.
489
00:17:38,492 --> 00:17:40,581
Or Jesus.Whoever's listening.
490
00:17:40,624 --> 00:17:42,670
Now, come on.Let's go call Honey.
491
00:17:42,713 --> 00:17:47,805
Hans Gruber is actually
the hero of this story.
492
00:17:47,849 --> 00:17:51,026
This must be what
King Kong feels like.
493
00:17:51,070 --> 00:17:58,294
♪♪
494
00:17:58,338 --> 00:18:00,688
[ Polka music plays ]
495
00:18:00,731 --> 00:18:02,472
You do this all day?
496
00:18:02,516 --> 00:18:04,996
Put on cheap makeup
and pick up trash?
497
00:18:05,040 --> 00:18:07,825
Um, I did find an
almost-untouched BLT once,
498
00:18:07,869 --> 00:18:09,262
so it's not always
terrible.
499
00:18:09,305 --> 00:18:10,611
Oh.
500
00:18:10,654 --> 00:18:13,353
Look at all those couples
spending time together.
501
00:18:13,396 --> 00:18:16,051
I mean, that's what Christmas
is all about.
502
00:18:16,095 --> 00:18:18,314
[ Exhales sharply ]
Shame we can't join them.
503
00:18:18,358 --> 00:18:20,273
We're too busy
working around the clock,
504
00:18:20,316 --> 00:18:22,188
picking up trash
so the town looks perfect.
505
00:18:26,757 --> 00:18:29,151
How'd it go with Operation
Stolen Nutcracker Return?
506
00:18:29,195 --> 00:18:32,154
Success. I told the vendor I wascleaning it in Santa's workshop.
507
00:18:32,198 --> 00:18:34,287
Everyone trusts a kidwearing bells.[ Door opens ]
508
00:18:34,330 --> 00:18:35,549
Ha!
509
00:18:35,592 --> 00:18:37,812
Isn't this wrapping paper
perfect? [ Chuckles ]
510
00:18:37,855 --> 00:18:40,423
Navy blue?
511
00:18:40,467 --> 00:18:43,209
Because the nutcracker's
clearly a naval officer.
512
00:18:44,688 --> 00:18:46,995
Eh, you know what?
Marvin will appreciate it.
513
00:18:47,038 --> 00:18:48,823
Yeah.
About that gift...
514
00:18:48,866 --> 00:18:51,608
We --Good-looking jaws
on this one.
515
00:18:51,652 --> 00:18:53,001
Cherish him.
516
00:18:53,044 --> 00:18:54,394
Ohh!
517
00:18:54,437 --> 00:18:57,788
[ Chuckles ] Thank you
for keeping it safe, guys.
518
00:18:57,832 --> 00:18:59,355
[ Laughs ]
519
00:18:59,399 --> 00:19:02,445
I don't know how you resisted
the urge to play with this guy.
520
00:19:02,489 --> 00:19:05,013
You have more willpower
than me.
521
00:19:05,056 --> 00:19:06,841
[ Door closes ]Whoa, G-ma.
522
00:19:06,884 --> 00:19:08,799
Why'd you bail us out?
523
00:19:08,843 --> 00:19:13,587
I overheard you were in trouble,so I did it for the family.
524
00:19:13,630 --> 00:19:16,024
All: For the family.
525
00:19:19,506 --> 00:19:22,857
[ Sighs ]
526
00:19:22,900 --> 00:19:25,338
Nice chimney.
Peppermint bark?
527
00:19:25,381 --> 00:19:27,992
It was a milk crate
from the shed.
528
00:19:28,036 --> 00:19:30,473
I didn't mean to crap so hardon your gingerbread house.
529
00:19:30,517 --> 00:19:33,476
I was just worried thatChristmas would be ruined
530
00:19:33,520 --> 00:19:34,477
if I didn't
make it perfect.
531
00:19:34,521 --> 00:19:36,436
It's what I'm known for.
532
00:19:36,479 --> 00:19:37,611
Christmas isn't about
being perfect.
533
00:19:37,654 --> 00:19:39,482
It's about being together.
534
00:19:39,526 --> 00:19:40,483
We just want
to spend it with you,
535
00:19:40,527 --> 00:19:42,006
no matter how...
536
00:19:42,050 --> 00:19:43,443
crappy it looks.
537
00:19:43,486 --> 00:19:44,618
So, you see it, too?
538
00:19:46,663 --> 00:19:51,059
I know you were just trying tohelp when you wrote those cards.
539
00:19:51,102 --> 00:19:53,583
Want to skate circlesaround some teenagers?
540
00:19:53,627 --> 00:19:55,368
Disrupt their make-outs?
541
00:19:55,411 --> 00:19:58,153
Really? I thought you were
worried about getting hurt.
542
00:19:58,197 --> 00:20:00,721
Fun fact -- I'm goodat everything I do.
543
00:20:00,764 --> 00:20:03,245
Besides, what is thereleft to do?
544
00:20:03,289 --> 00:20:05,465
You built the
gingerbread house,
545
00:20:05,508 --> 00:20:07,945
and I see why
everybody loves it.
546
00:20:07,989 --> 00:20:09,033
Well, don't look
too close.
547
00:20:09,077 --> 00:20:10,861
I cut a few corners
during construction.
548
00:20:10,905 --> 00:20:13,168
[ Animal squeaks ][ Screams ]
There's a rat in here!
549
00:20:13,212 --> 00:20:15,518
Boss, there's a rat in here!
550
00:20:15,562 --> 00:20:16,650
♪♪
551
00:20:19,914 --> 00:20:22,525
Yeah, 50 soft tacos,here I come!
552
00:20:22,569 --> 00:20:23,961
[ Clears throat ]
553
00:20:24,005 --> 00:20:25,354
[ Exhales sharply ]
Come on, Grandma.
554
00:20:25,398 --> 00:20:26,312
We're family.
555
00:20:28,966 --> 00:20:30,751
[ Sighs ]
556
00:20:30,794 --> 00:20:33,406
Well, Emery,
at least youhave one.
557
00:20:33,449 --> 00:20:35,973
Although, if we
split it three ways...
558
00:20:36,017 --> 00:20:37,497
I'm spending mine
at the spa.
559
00:20:39,194 --> 00:20:40,848
Oh, you look just like
a candy cane.
560
00:20:40,891 --> 00:20:42,415
[ Chuckles ]
561
00:20:42,458 --> 00:20:43,503
How you feeling?
562
00:20:43,546 --> 00:20:45,983
That was a pretty gruesome fall
you took on the ice.
563
00:20:46,027 --> 00:20:47,289
Hey, at leastit restored my faith
564
00:20:47,333 --> 00:20:49,291
in Orlando'smedical response team.
565
00:20:49,335 --> 00:20:52,076
That ambulance came fast.
[ Chuckles ]
566
00:20:52,120 --> 00:20:53,600
[ Grunts ]
567
00:20:56,951 --> 00:20:58,692
Oh, Louis.
568
00:20:59,649 --> 00:21:01,999
You know these would have been
50% off tomorrow.
569
00:21:02,043 --> 00:21:03,784
Jessica.
They're perfect.
570
00:21:06,439 --> 00:21:08,441
[ Festive music plays ]
571
00:21:08,484 --> 00:21:13,446
♪♪
572
00:21:13,489 --> 00:21:15,535
[ Horse whinnies ]
573
00:21:15,578 --> 00:21:17,885
Hold my hand.I don't want to fall.
574
00:21:17,928 --> 00:21:22,193
Come on. You just push off to
the sides, and go -- like this!
575
00:21:22,237 --> 00:21:22,977
Oh!
Aah!
576
00:21:23,020 --> 00:21:26,372
[ Thud ]
My arms!
Ooooooh.
38724
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