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- In 1964 Granada
television brought together
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a group of seven-year-olds
from all over the country
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and from all walks of life.
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- I'm going to work in Woolworths.
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- I read the Financial Times.
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- They talked about
their dreams, their ambitions
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and their fears for the future.
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- Everything throughout the
year it all landed on my head.
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- For nearly half a century,
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in a unique ground-breaking
series of films,
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we have followed their
lives every seven years.
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They are now 46.
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00:00:48,121 --> 00:00:49,881
Lynn, Sue and Jackie grew up
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in London's East End and
were friends at school.
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- With this school we do metalwork
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and woodwork and the boys do cookery.
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All you girls want to do
is walk out, get married,
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have babies, and push
a pram down the street
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with a fag hanging out
the side of your mouth.
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- I think that we all
could have gone in any way
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that we wanted to at the
time within our capabilities.
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- But we only had a limited choice anyway,
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I mean truth be told
we didn't have a choice
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of private education because they
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couldn't have afforded it anyway.
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- Our lives are changing
far too much all of us.
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- Well to be honest when you
look at the seven-year-old us
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it's difficult to believe it is us.
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- I've got to say it girls I
wanted to work in Woolworths.
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- I'm glad you said that 'cause
everyone thinks it was me.
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- I would like to get
married when I grow up.
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Well I don't know what sort of boy
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but I think one that's
not got a lot of money
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but has got some money, not a lot.
35
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- Have you got any boyfriends?
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- That's personal isn't it?
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- By the time she was 21 Jackie
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had married Mick and moved
to the outskirts of London.
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She and Mick had decided early on
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that they didn't want to have children.
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00:02:23,041 --> 00:02:24,681
- Basically
I would have said it's
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because I'm far too selfish.
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- By 35, she was divorced.
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- We decided ourselves, I mean
just between the two of us,
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we knew it wasn't going any further.
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We both knew I think that
at the end of the day
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we would be happier leading our own lives.
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And this one on, here you go, oh yeah.
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I had a brief but very sweet relationship,
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the result of which was Charlie.
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I don't really want Charlie to be an only.
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I'd love him to have brothers and sisters
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but not necessarily loads of
them, one would do actually!
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Right Charlie there's yours.
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And please eat it all up.
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And James.
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- Thanks mum.
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- Good boy, and last but not least.
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Are you going to eat that one for me?
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- After her relationship
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with Charlie's father ended,
she met Ian and they moved
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to Scotland and had two sons
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- James.
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- By 42, they had split up.
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- Lee.
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- At 49, despite the split,
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the family were living in
the same area of Scotland.
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Seven years later, they are still there.
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So tell me who lives where?
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- Lee will be here until October.
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James is here until he
moves in with his girlfriend
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which I'm hoping won't be too long.
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Charlie has actually
already moved out because
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of his dad, or their dad I should say,
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because Ian's been diagnosed with cancer
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and its stage four so it's quite advanced.
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Oh yeah, he likes a thrill.
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You know what he's like.
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00:04:35,441 --> 00:04:38,121
- The strange
part about this is his
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mother's also got cancer as well.
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- Your grandmother?
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- Their grandmother.
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Hey come on swans!
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She's brilliant.
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If I could have chosen a mother-in-law
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she was the one that I would have chosen.
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She's great for me, she's
absolutely brilliant
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with the children and she's just always
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there when I need her to be.
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She's terminal.
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00:05:02,641 --> 00:05:04,001
- How long's she got?
92
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- Don't know.
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Not too bad.
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00:05:08,721 --> 00:05:10,481
They don't know how long.
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I think they're talking
months rather than years
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and to have mother and son suffering
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the same sort of thing is very difficult.
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- She doesn't want us to
sit around and feel sorry
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and be sad she wants us to
get on and live our lives
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and it's not stopped her
from trying to live her life.
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00:05:31,561 --> 00:05:33,321
- It seems to have been
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one thing after another really.
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My step mum died, my brother-in-law died,
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00:05:38,321 --> 00:05:42,361
my sister's died, she wasn't 40.
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She'd actually gone downstairs
and made herself a cup of tea
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and collapsed on the way
back up to her bedroom
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and that was a major brain haemorrhage.
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- So boys, how is
your mother handling all this?
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- In her stride.
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00:05:57,801 --> 00:06:00,641
- Nothing seems to be
getting to her, it's just--
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00:06:00,641 --> 00:06:03,081
- She's always been a strong woman.
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00:06:03,081 --> 00:06:05,121
she will be upset but
she won't let us see it.
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00:06:05,121 --> 00:06:07,801
She always puts on a
brave face in front of us
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00:06:07,801 --> 00:06:09,081
but when she's alone or with her friends
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that's when she gets the sadness out.
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- This is a period
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when the four of you feel close?
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- We've got to be there for
each other in things like this.
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00:06:20,041 --> 00:06:22,601
- Actually, I would say
in the last six months
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they've all suddenly seemed
to have gotten a new maturity.
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00:06:27,801 --> 00:06:30,281
My mum cause she's got five girls,
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she had seven years bad luck,
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that's why she's got five girls.
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- Two club sandwiches on brown bread,
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one Hilton burger with cheese.
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00:06:43,081 --> 00:06:44,401
- Charlie is a sous-chef
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00:06:44,401 --> 00:06:47,761
in a nearby hotel, and
James works part time
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as a security guard in
a local super market
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- Check two aisles up from
your current location.
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00:06:55,241 --> 00:06:59,481
I'm expecting a baby in December,
I'm still young obviously
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so it was a bit of a shock
but I am excited about it.
132
00:07:03,721 --> 00:07:04,721
- How old are you now?
133
00:07:04,721 --> 00:07:05,881
- 19 coming on 20
134
00:07:05,881 --> 00:07:08,841
- Okay and can I ask are you
excited to becoming a gran?
135
00:07:11,001 --> 00:07:11,841
- I don't know about that.
136
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- She doesn't
like being called granny!
137
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- No, I will be gran, not granny.
138
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Thank you!
139
00:07:18,121 --> 00:07:21,361
Not nappy fill now please
madam, oh look at the face.
140
00:07:22,361 --> 00:07:25,921
Well since you were here
recently we've had a new addition
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to the family her name is Mya.
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Mya was born on the 21st of November
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and unfortunately on the
18th November her granddad,
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Ian,the boys dad, was severely injured
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in a road traffic accident.
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He subsequent died of those injuries.
147
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Unfortunately, he never
regained consciousness
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so he never even met
her but he took a photo
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of her in his coffin and I
dare say he's looking down
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and saying "ha I got away with it.
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I've not got all those nights."
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- I'm due to go in the
army on the 17th of October
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where I'll learn to become a medic.
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- I mean I can't stop him now he's 18.
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He can do what he likes.
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He can sign on without my approval.
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But it's a chance he
takes and he knows that
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there's a possibility
that he won't come home.
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- At the end of the day you're a soldier
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and going out to war is
part of being a soldier
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and that's what you got to do.
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- I want you to do it but
it's not gonna stop me
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worrying you know that, you know that.
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I took a year off when I had Charlie
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and the state kept me for that year
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but I went back to work
and although to be honest
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by the time I pay everything out
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I'm not actually that better
off but I feel better.
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James, you watch your catching up to him.
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Go on Lee.
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I was working up here until very recently
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but they've discovered that
I've got rheumatoid arthritis
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so at the moment that's put work on hold.
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Missy, come on then!
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For every one good day I
have I can have two bad,
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which means I can't get
out of bed very well.
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It takes me two, three hours to get ready.
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The poor, if you don't help them
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they'll sort of die soon wouldn't they?
180
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- Jackie has been living
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on disability benefits for over 14 years.
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- I don't cope financially,
without my mother-in-law
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stepping in to fill the
gap I wouldn't be coping.
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It's really hard to explain to anyone
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who's not had to do it, you
get to a point where either
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that bill doesn't get
paid or your children
187
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don't eat, so obviously your children eat.
188
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You can go to the charity
shop and get them.
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I'll never notice--
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- So looking at the world
191
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of cut backs how is this affecting you?
192
00:09:53,921 --> 00:09:56,481
- I along with probably
millions of other people
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in this country have
had my benefits reviewed
194
00:10:01,841 --> 00:10:06,161
and they sent me for a
medical and have come back
195
00:10:06,161 --> 00:10:11,161
and told me I'm fit to work
which is a bit of a shock,
196
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what job can I do, I can't use my hands,
197
00:10:16,681 --> 00:10:19,721
I can't sit for long, I can't stand
198
00:10:19,721 --> 00:10:21,921
for long, I can't walk very far.
199
00:10:23,321 --> 00:10:28,321
I don't know how they
expect anybody to employ me
200
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because I couldn't guarantee
being there five days a week.
201
00:10:35,081 --> 00:10:38,081
I mean I'm lucky in as
much as I've got three sons
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all working, whilst James here's got Mya
203
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and a family of his own,
Charlie and Lee don't
204
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so they help me out and they have to.
205
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By all means cut the benefits
but you've got people
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out there that are healthy
and are milking the system
207
00:11:00,641 --> 00:11:03,921
and they're not touching them,
they're getting away with it.
208
00:11:03,921 --> 00:11:08,001
If David Cameron can find me
a job then I'll go to work,
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00:11:08,001 --> 00:11:10,001
if he can find an employer, you tell him
210
00:11:10,001 --> 00:11:12,521
to come and get me a job and I'll do it.
211
00:11:13,921 --> 00:11:18,001
Well I know he is hers and he loves her.
212
00:11:18,001 --> 00:11:19,361
- I don't I love him.
213
00:11:21,001 --> 00:11:24,881
- I'd like to have a happy family',
214
00:11:24,881 --> 00:11:26,881
I mean I know that it's
not possible to be happy
215
00:11:26,881 --> 00:11:31,121
all the time but as much of
the time that it was possible.
216
00:11:31,121 --> 00:11:32,681
- Well what about your own life,
217
00:11:32,681 --> 00:11:34,521
what about relationships for you?
218
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- I would like a relationship.
219
00:11:37,761 --> 00:11:39,641
I mean I've been trying
for the last five years
220
00:11:39,641 --> 00:11:43,081
to build up a social life of my own
221
00:11:43,081 --> 00:11:46,761
because I knew that this time would come.
222
00:11:47,921 --> 00:11:49,561
I've been using the internet
223
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which is interesting to say the least.
224
00:11:54,241 --> 00:11:55,401
- Is it scary?
225
00:11:55,401 --> 00:11:57,081
- I mean you know some people have
226
00:11:57,081 --> 00:11:59,561
obviously had bad experiences with it.
227
00:12:01,001 --> 00:12:01,801
Yes.
228
00:12:01,801 --> 00:12:04,441
- But there was
a chap that we filmed when
229
00:12:04,441 --> 00:12:06,761
we were looking at you and
Liz, what happened to him?
230
00:12:06,761 --> 00:12:08,841
- He decided he needed space.
231
00:12:10,001 --> 00:12:12,161
So I gave him that space.
232
00:12:12,161 --> 00:12:14,681
So that was a bit of a disaster.
233
00:12:14,681 --> 00:12:18,241
But that's the way of relationships
234
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sometimes they work sometimes they don't.
235
00:12:21,081 --> 00:12:24,041
- What are you
looking for in a fellow?
236
00:12:24,041 --> 00:12:25,721
- A pulse would be nice!
237
00:12:27,881 --> 00:12:30,201
♪ If I say that I love you ♪
238
00:12:30,201 --> 00:12:33,281
♪ And you know it's true ♪
239
00:12:33,281 --> 00:12:36,081
- You look
great, you seem optimistic.
240
00:12:36,081 --> 00:12:37,641
- Yeah, no I am.
241
00:12:38,481 --> 00:12:41,081
My glass is always half
full never half empty
242
00:12:43,681 --> 00:12:48,681
and that's the way it will
continue to be I hope.
243
00:12:49,001 --> 00:12:54,001
Life's too short and you just
have to try and go on the best
244
00:12:55,161 --> 00:12:58,321
you can and I think my
life's gonna be good.
245
00:13:28,761 --> 00:13:31,161
- What sort of things do you do?
246
00:13:31,161 --> 00:13:34,441
- Ride, swim, play tennis, ping pong.
247
00:13:36,721 --> 00:13:40,041
I might play croquet, something like that.
248
00:13:40,881 --> 00:13:43,681
- I don't think my father
wants me to be a farmer.
249
00:13:43,681 --> 00:13:45,561
My youngest brother, the
deaf one, if he can't
250
00:13:45,561 --> 00:13:47,761
do anything else he can
probably run a farm.
251
00:13:49,481 --> 00:13:52,161
I thought that you and
I were both in the film
252
00:13:52,161 --> 00:13:56,961
as being rural in the
sense that your family had
253
00:13:56,961 --> 00:14:00,961
some big connections to
rural Scotland I thought.
254
00:14:00,961 --> 00:14:04,281
- Yeah and I think
also when we were 21 I seem
255
00:14:04,281 --> 00:14:06,561
to remember having to go to some reunion
256
00:14:06,561 --> 00:14:09,961
or something somewhere and I
remember you just stuck out
257
00:14:09,961 --> 00:14:12,721
as being the one person that I had more
258
00:14:12,721 --> 00:14:16,201
in common with and spoke to the most.
259
00:14:17,561 --> 00:14:19,721
Well I've played for the same four girls
260
00:14:19,721 --> 00:14:20,761
for the last 25, 26 years.
261
00:14:20,761 --> 00:14:21,601
- We've been emailing each other
262
00:14:22,841 --> 00:14:23,681
since forty something--
263
00:14:23,681 --> 00:14:24,561
- I think yes.
264
00:14:24,561 --> 00:14:27,161
It was one night it was just,
I think it was quite late
265
00:14:27,161 --> 00:14:29,081
and I just threw a line at Nick.
266
00:14:29,081 --> 00:14:32,281
So I said I'm going to
bed now I said perhaps you
267
00:14:32,281 --> 00:14:33,641
and I ought to do a double act
268
00:14:33,641 --> 00:14:35,881
on the sofa and I went to bed--
269
00:14:35,881 --> 00:14:37,241
- I'm not sure--
270
00:14:40,161 --> 00:14:41,041
I mean--
271
00:14:41,041 --> 00:14:43,561
- And you wrote back some funny message
272
00:14:43,561 --> 00:14:44,641
that I picked up the next morning.
273
00:14:44,641 --> 00:14:46,801
- Well no wonder
I would wouldn't I?
274
00:14:46,801 --> 00:14:51,481
- When I leave this school
I'm down for Heathfield
275
00:14:51,481 --> 00:14:56,321
and Southhill Manor and
then maybe I may want to go
276
00:14:56,321 --> 00:14:59,241
to a university but I
don't know which one yet.
277
00:14:59,241 --> 00:15:01,201
My home life wasn't very easy then.
278
00:15:01,201 --> 00:15:04,601
I'd been sent off to boarding
school when I was quite young.
279
00:15:05,441 --> 00:15:07,481
My parents marriage was breaking up
280
00:15:08,401 --> 00:15:11,161
and like a lot of
children I think you feel
281
00:15:11,161 --> 00:15:14,641
that you take the blame
for why they've broken up.
282
00:15:14,641 --> 00:15:17,601
That's just the way it was
and I hated the two years
283
00:15:17,601 --> 00:15:20,081
I was away at this first boarding school
284
00:15:20,081 --> 00:15:23,241
and I think that was
probably what changed me.
285
00:15:23,241 --> 00:15:26,321
- Well I hated boarding
school too with a passion.
286
00:15:26,321 --> 00:15:29,721
I was forced to grow, I didn't choose it;
287
00:15:29,721 --> 00:15:32,761
I definitely got some messages
that said you're gonna
288
00:15:32,761 --> 00:15:37,721
be in trouble if you
don't do well and so on.
289
00:15:37,721 --> 00:15:39,481
- But you don't regret it--
290
00:15:39,481 --> 00:15:40,481
- No, no, no.
291
00:15:40,481 --> 00:15:42,361
- And you wouldn't you wouldn't
have the life you have now.
292
00:15:42,361 --> 00:15:46,761
- Hey I'm grateful for it but
it was very uncomfortable.
293
00:15:47,641 --> 00:15:50,201
- I was never one
to push myself forward.
294
00:15:50,201 --> 00:15:51,201
- And nobody else was pushing.
295
00:15:51,201 --> 00:15:52,601
- And no one else pushed me.
296
00:15:53,681 --> 00:15:56,881
I left school when I
was 16, went to Paris,
297
00:15:56,881 --> 00:15:59,561
went to secretarial college and got a job.
298
00:16:00,521 --> 00:16:01,761
- What made you decide
299
00:16:01,761 --> 00:16:03,401
to leave school and go to Paris?
300
00:16:04,721 --> 00:16:05,881
- Well I just wanted interested in school
301
00:16:05,881 --> 00:16:08,081
and just wanted to get away.
302
00:16:09,081 --> 00:16:12,361
- If you have had no
choice but to get out there
303
00:16:12,361 --> 00:16:15,961
and support yourself the
chances would have been greater
304
00:16:15,961 --> 00:16:18,241
that you would have
forced yourself to do it.
305
00:16:18,241 --> 00:16:20,481
- Yeah that's
possibly true but at the age
306
00:16:20,481 --> 00:16:25,481
of 11, 12, 13 are you
really aware of that?
307
00:16:27,321 --> 00:16:29,081
- Now that's a very telling question,
308
00:16:29,081 --> 00:16:31,281
in my world you betcha.
309
00:16:32,241 --> 00:16:35,921
When I grow I'd like to find out all
310
00:16:35,921 --> 00:16:38,241
about the moon and all that.
311
00:16:38,241 --> 00:16:39,801
And I said that I was
interested in physics
312
00:16:39,801 --> 00:16:42,481
and chemistry, well I'm
not going to do that here.
313
00:16:42,481 --> 00:16:45,481
- At 14 Nick was
away at boarding school,
314
00:16:45,481 --> 00:16:48,081
at 21 reading physics at Oxford.
315
00:16:49,321 --> 00:16:53,721
His road to Oxford started
in a one room village school.
316
00:16:53,721 --> 00:16:55,961
- My father was here a long time ago
317
00:16:55,961 --> 00:16:58,001
He must be somewhere in these pictures.
318
00:16:58,001 --> 00:17:00,441
I remember distinctly coming here one day
319
00:17:00,441 --> 00:17:02,321
and I'd missed a day for some reason
320
00:17:02,321 --> 00:17:04,081
and they'd been talking about something
321
00:17:04,081 --> 00:17:08,201
to do with aeroplanes and
the teacher said we missed you
322
00:17:08,201 --> 00:17:10,281
because you would have
known about aeroplanes.
323
00:17:10,281 --> 00:17:12,161
I knew nothing about aeroplanes
324
00:17:12,161 --> 00:17:15,001
but I thought oh I know
about aeroplanes do I?
325
00:17:15,001 --> 00:17:17,321
So then I went off and
read about aeroplanes,
326
00:17:17,321 --> 00:17:21,201
so that could easily have
been the start of I want to go
327
00:17:21,201 --> 00:17:24,961
to the moon and I think she
planted that idea in me.
328
00:17:24,961 --> 00:17:28,041
- Do you have a girlfriend?
329
00:17:30,721 --> 00:17:33,281
- I don't want to answer that.
330
00:17:33,281 --> 00:17:37,521
I don't want to answer
those kind of questions.
331
00:17:39,081 --> 00:17:43,521
I thought that one would come
up because when I was doing
332
00:17:43,521 --> 00:17:45,601
the other one somebody
said what do you think
333
00:17:45,601 --> 00:17:47,601
about girls and I said I don't
answer questions like that,
334
00:17:47,601 --> 00:17:49,361
is that the reason your asking it?
335
00:17:51,281 --> 00:17:52,881
The best answer would be to say
336
00:17:52,881 --> 00:17:54,601
that I don't answer questions like that
337
00:17:54,601 --> 00:17:58,241
but I mean it was what
I said when I was seven
338
00:17:58,241 --> 00:18:01,521
and it's still the most
sensible but what about them?
339
00:18:02,601 --> 00:18:06,241
- I mean if you'd been somebody
who had had fixed ideas
340
00:18:07,241 --> 00:18:10,481
of a woman's role in
marriage that meant dinner
341
00:18:10,481 --> 00:18:13,001
on the table at six every evening--
342
00:18:13,001 --> 00:18:15,401
- Didn't I tell you about that?
343
00:18:15,401 --> 00:18:18,001
- By 28 Nick had married Jackie,
344
00:18:18,001 --> 00:18:20,321
a fellow student from Oxford.
345
00:18:20,321 --> 00:18:22,321
They had a son Adam.
346
00:18:22,321 --> 00:18:24,881
By 42 they were divorced.
347
00:18:24,881 --> 00:18:27,001
- What I concluded and
I've talked to other people
348
00:18:27,001 --> 00:18:28,881
about this who've gone through it,
349
00:18:28,881 --> 00:18:30,281
I'm not sure if they feel it as strongly
350
00:18:30,281 --> 00:18:32,841
as I did but it was like a death.
351
00:18:32,841 --> 00:18:35,441
- Anything could happen, we
could easily drift apart;
352
00:18:35,441 --> 00:18:37,561
there are so many pressures on people.
353
00:18:37,561 --> 00:18:39,521
- If your spouse died you could look back
354
00:18:39,521 --> 00:18:42,961
and think well it was
wonderful while it lasted,
355
00:18:42,961 --> 00:18:45,961
but in a divorce you can't look back
356
00:18:45,961 --> 00:18:50,361
and say these are all happy memories.
357
00:18:50,361 --> 00:18:52,961
- Hey Chris.
358
00:18:52,961 --> 00:18:55,401
- Chris is my new wife.
359
00:18:57,961 --> 00:18:59,881
I don't mean to be superficial but I think
360
00:18:59,881 --> 00:19:02,521
she's the most beautiful
woman I've ever seen.
361
00:19:03,481 --> 00:19:05,001
- Is he sexy?
362
00:19:05,001 --> 00:19:06,081
- Oh man.
363
00:19:08,481 --> 00:19:09,681
Absolutely.
364
00:19:13,081 --> 00:19:14,801
Didn't you have fun with that one?
365
00:19:15,921 --> 00:19:18,161
- Well I always need to learn patience
366
00:19:18,161 --> 00:19:20,641
and, what do I need to learn?
367
00:19:22,441 --> 00:19:23,761
- Shall I get out my list?
368
00:19:23,761 --> 00:19:25,561
- Yeah I think we need the list.
369
00:19:25,561 --> 00:19:27,121
- Go on.
370
00:19:27,121 --> 00:19:29,161
- No.
371
00:19:29,161 --> 00:19:34,161
- Tell me do you
have any boyfriends Suzy?
372
00:19:34,201 --> 00:19:35,841
- Yes
373
00:19:35,841 --> 00:19:37,801
- Tell me about them?
374
00:19:37,801 --> 00:19:41,641
- He lives up in Scotland
and I think he's 13.
375
00:19:44,401 --> 00:19:48,161
- Have you
got any boyfriends Suzy?
376
00:19:49,761 --> 00:19:53,681
What is your attitude towards
marriage for yourself?
377
00:19:58,481 --> 00:19:59,321
- Well I don't know.
378
00:19:59,321 --> 00:20:00,161
I haven't given it a lot of thought
379
00:20:00,161 --> 00:20:02,401
'cause I'm very very cynical about it.
380
00:20:02,401 --> 00:20:05,081
- When I last saw
you at 21 you were nervous,
381
00:20:05,081 --> 00:20:08,641
you were chain smoking, you
were uptight and now you seem
382
00:20:08,641 --> 00:20:12,921
happy, what's happened to you
over these last seven years?
383
00:20:14,081 --> 00:20:15,001
- I suppose Rupert.
384
00:20:16,041 --> 00:20:17,681
I'll give you some credit.
385
00:20:19,161 --> 00:20:21,241
- I'm not chain smoking.
386
00:20:24,761 --> 00:20:27,401
- No I think you can't just
walk through a marriage
387
00:20:27,401 --> 00:20:29,281
and think once you get
married it's all gonna
388
00:20:29,281 --> 00:20:32,241
be roses and everything forever.
389
00:20:32,241 --> 00:20:36,001
It's very hard to actually
say what it is that goes on
390
00:20:36,001 --> 00:20:39,681
between a couple, it's
either there or it's not.
391
00:20:41,721 --> 00:20:46,481
Any marriage has its ups
and downs but somehow
392
00:20:46,481 --> 00:20:48,561
whether it's through luck or determination
393
00:20:48,561 --> 00:20:51,601
we've worked through the difficult times.
394
00:21:01,281 --> 00:21:04,961
- One of my favourite places
in Oxford, Merton Chapel.
395
00:21:04,961 --> 00:21:09,281
Here's this lovely top part of the cross
396
00:21:09,281 --> 00:21:12,881
and there was going to be
the main part of the cross.
397
00:21:12,881 --> 00:21:15,001
This is one of the places in England
398
00:21:15,001 --> 00:21:17,801
that just is tremendously important to me.
399
00:21:17,801 --> 00:21:20,961
After I left the Dales
this was where I spent
400
00:21:20,961 --> 00:21:24,001
the next six years and
then I went to America.
401
00:21:24,001 --> 00:21:25,161
- Look at this isn't this beautiful?
402
00:21:25,161 --> 00:21:27,641
This is Mob Quad.
403
00:21:27,641 --> 00:21:30,281
I believe that it's
historical fact that there
404
00:21:30,281 --> 00:21:32,321
were quite a lot of
students who were massacred
405
00:21:32,321 --> 00:21:33,481
in the Middle Ages and for.
406
00:21:33,481 --> 00:21:37,001
When I came here I thought
I'd died and gone to heaven.
407
00:21:37,001 --> 00:21:39,561
But I was under an awful
lot of stress all the time
408
00:21:39,561 --> 00:21:43,881
I was here trying to succeed
in this place as well.
409
00:21:43,881 --> 00:21:46,201
- Okay, yeah so this was my staircase
410
00:21:46,201 --> 00:21:49,041
in my first year and
also on my third year.
411
00:21:49,041 --> 00:21:51,961
There was this fella who lived
in the room next door to me
412
00:21:51,961 --> 00:21:54,681
and he came in one day
to tell me some story
413
00:21:54,681 --> 00:21:57,121
and on his way out he said "you know
414
00:21:57,121 --> 00:22:00,681
I don't associate intelligence
with your accent."
415
00:22:00,681 --> 00:22:04,601
It would seem really
ridiculous to any of my friends
416
00:22:04,601 --> 00:22:06,441
who watch this if I said "Christ aren't I
417
00:22:06,441 --> 00:22:10,681
a great success look at me, what success?
418
00:22:12,481 --> 00:22:14,481
- By the time he was 28
419
00:22:14,481 --> 00:22:16,321
Nick had emigrated to America.
420
00:22:17,361 --> 00:22:19,881
He was doing research into nuclear fusion
421
00:22:19,881 --> 00:22:21,921
at the University of Wisconsin.
422
00:22:21,921 --> 00:22:23,641
- Tell me about the current drive.
423
00:22:24,641 --> 00:22:26,281
- If you'd have
been offered a similar
424
00:22:26,281 --> 00:22:28,481
type of job over here--
425
00:22:28,481 --> 00:22:30,681
- In a heartbeat.
426
00:22:30,681 --> 00:22:31,521
- You would have stayed?
427
00:22:31,521 --> 00:22:33,801
- In a heartbeat.
428
00:22:33,801 --> 00:22:38,281
I mean I had dreamed of getting
a university job over here.
429
00:22:38,281 --> 00:22:43,081
Maggie Thatcher was squeezing
the universities like crazy
430
00:22:43,081 --> 00:22:46,801
at that very moment in time
and it was the worst time
431
00:22:46,801 --> 00:22:50,441
to be working in a
university in generations.
432
00:22:51,841 --> 00:22:54,521
England doesn't seem to concern itself
433
00:22:54,521 --> 00:22:58,521
with training people like
me and wanting them around.
434
00:22:58,521 --> 00:23:00,881
There doesn't seem to
be a sense of urgency
435
00:23:00,881 --> 00:23:05,041
or a strong will to have
people developing technology
436
00:23:05,041 --> 00:23:07,601
to help keep the country going.
437
00:23:07,601 --> 00:23:10,401
The fusion reaction gives
off energy and produces
438
00:23:10,401 --> 00:23:13,801
the power that would be
turned into electrical energy.
439
00:23:13,801 --> 00:23:16,441
I was on a mission you know to get
440
00:23:16,441 --> 00:23:20,081
extremely cheap, clean
plentiful electricity,
441
00:23:20,081 --> 00:23:23,161
so nuclear fusion looked
like it was going to do that
442
00:23:23,161 --> 00:23:26,881
but even then they were
saying it's twenty years away.
443
00:23:26,881 --> 00:23:31,001
I would say absolutely not in my lifetime.
444
00:23:31,001 --> 00:23:33,481
I mean it was kind of heartbreaking.
445
00:23:33,481 --> 00:23:37,521
So I had to find something else to do.
446
00:23:37,521 --> 00:23:42,121
So the area that I'm looking
at is this times this.
447
00:23:42,121 --> 00:23:44,761
When I go in to a classroom
full of undergraduates I try
448
00:23:44,761 --> 00:23:47,561
and explain to them why they
might want to try and do it.
449
00:23:47,561 --> 00:23:50,841
That's my little attempt to
open a little door for them.
450
00:23:50,841 --> 00:23:52,041
See, there's a method in my madness.
451
00:23:52,041 --> 00:23:55,761
- Nick is a Professor
of Electrical Engineering.
452
00:23:55,761 --> 00:23:56,721
- That's really
impressive, he was the guy.
453
00:23:56,721 --> 00:23:59,321
And my ambition as a
scientist is to be more famous
454
00:23:59,321 --> 00:24:01,281
for doing science than
for being in this film
455
00:24:01,281 --> 00:24:03,961
but unfortunately Michael
it's not going to happen.
456
00:24:19,321 --> 00:24:21,881
- When I get married I'd
like to have two children.
457
00:24:24,401 --> 00:24:27,521
I'm not very children-minded
at the moment,
458
00:24:27,521 --> 00:24:29,081
I don't know if I ever will be.
459
00:24:31,161 --> 00:24:32,881
- What do you think about them?
460
00:24:32,881 --> 00:24:34,201
- Well I don't like babies.
461
00:24:37,041 --> 00:24:40,881
- At 28 Suzy had
two sons Thomas and Oliver.
462
00:24:41,721 --> 00:24:43,321
- Don't touch it.
463
00:24:43,321 --> 00:24:45,281
- By the time she was 34
464
00:24:45,281 --> 00:24:47,561
she also had a daughter Laura.
465
00:24:47,561 --> 00:24:48,481
- Mummy?
466
00:24:48,481 --> 00:24:49,641
- Yeah
467
00:24:49,641 --> 00:24:52,081
- Laura wants you.
468
00:24:52,081 --> 00:24:55,881
- We were lucky we had
a very good family unit
469
00:24:55,881 --> 00:24:59,361
with them growing up and
that meant an awful lot
470
00:24:59,361 --> 00:25:00,801
to me that I was able to do that
471
00:25:00,801 --> 00:25:04,161
for them 'cause I never had it for myself.
472
00:25:04,161 --> 00:25:05,321
- And you've done it.
473
00:25:05,321 --> 00:25:07,401
You've been tremendously successful at it.
474
00:25:08,361 --> 00:25:09,641
- Well you see that's my problem.
475
00:25:09,641 --> 00:25:12,161
I don't think as myself as being,
476
00:25:12,161 --> 00:25:15,201
I just do my best and
do what I can for them.
477
00:25:18,321 --> 00:25:20,321
- Did all your
children go to university?
478
00:25:20,321 --> 00:25:21,161
Your daughter did?
479
00:25:21,161 --> 00:25:23,041
- Yes and my son, the eldest one.
480
00:25:27,201 --> 00:25:28,241
Hello.
481
00:25:28,241 --> 00:25:31,081
I haven't had a successful career no,
482
00:25:31,081 --> 00:25:34,521
but I do feel fulfilled
and I mean I've done quite
483
00:25:34,521 --> 00:25:37,961
a lot of different things
over the last seven years.
484
00:25:37,961 --> 00:25:40,961
You know we all make
mistakes in everything
485
00:25:40,961 --> 00:25:45,121
from parenting to decisions in life,
486
00:25:45,121 --> 00:25:46,481
you make mistakes and that's how
487
00:25:46,481 --> 00:25:48,521
you become the person you are.
488
00:25:48,521 --> 00:25:50,441
- You can talk to me by myself outside
489
00:25:50,441 --> 00:25:52,561
but I'll just meet your
by the garage okay?
490
00:25:54,081 --> 00:25:55,721
All right bye.
491
00:25:55,721 --> 00:25:56,961
- Nick's son Adam
492
00:25:56,961 --> 00:25:59,321
was 10 when his parents divorced.
493
00:26:01,001 --> 00:26:05,681
- When he was first
told he was terribly,
494
00:26:05,681 --> 00:26:09,841
terribly upset and then he
just pulled himself together
495
00:26:11,121 --> 00:26:14,001
and didn't want to talk about it anymore.
496
00:26:14,881 --> 00:26:17,841
Take it easy Adam the main
thing is not to crash.
497
00:26:17,841 --> 00:26:20,361
- Really you don't want
me to crash right now?
498
00:26:20,361 --> 00:26:22,161
- How's he deal with it now?
499
00:26:22,161 --> 00:26:26,321
- He doesn't talk to me
about it very much at all.
500
00:26:26,321 --> 00:26:27,761
He's a private person.
501
00:26:30,681 --> 00:26:32,721
He's getting more mature and he has
502
00:26:32,721 --> 00:26:35,561
to be very patient with me really.
503
00:26:35,561 --> 00:26:38,081
Can you imagine having me for a dad?
504
00:26:38,081 --> 00:26:41,201
Do you think it would be
a low-pressure existence?
505
00:26:41,201 --> 00:26:43,841
Wow this is my little school.
506
00:26:43,841 --> 00:26:45,961
I'm nuts and I would drive a kid nuts
507
00:26:45,961 --> 00:26:48,001
with all my nagging, I mean I drive--
508
00:26:48,001 --> 00:26:48,801
- Do you think you've pushed him
509
00:26:48,801 --> 00:26:51,961
too far which is why
he's now backing away?
510
00:26:51,961 --> 00:26:53,481
- Anything I push him to do he's going
511
00:26:53,481 --> 00:26:57,961
to do the opposite so
there's a real you know.
512
00:26:57,961 --> 00:27:01,641
They'd like to come out for
a holiday in the country
513
00:27:01,641 --> 00:27:05,841
when I like to have a holiday in the town.
514
00:27:05,841 --> 00:27:07,681
It's a fixed reference point in a sense,
515
00:27:07,681 --> 00:27:11,641
the sort of earthy life and death cycle
516
00:27:11,641 --> 00:27:14,641
that you get living on a farm.
517
00:27:14,641 --> 00:27:16,121
And so when something dies it rots
518
00:27:16,121 --> 00:27:18,161
and feeds back in to the earth.
519
00:27:19,601 --> 00:27:21,921
- He has a density to him.
520
00:27:21,921 --> 00:27:22,961
One of the first things he said
521
00:27:22,961 --> 00:27:25,041
to me is my feet on in the mud.
522
00:27:25,041 --> 00:27:30,041
The whole idea of being deep
in the mud and very attached
523
00:27:31,961 --> 00:27:35,721
to a foundation makes good sense to me.
524
00:27:38,281 --> 00:27:39,641
- Nick has two younger brothers,
525
00:27:39,641 --> 00:27:41,121
Andrew and Christopher.
526
00:27:43,201 --> 00:27:46,441
- Well I come up most weekends
and then Chris gets up
527
00:27:46,441 --> 00:27:49,961
usually in mid week so
he helps with shopping
528
00:27:49,961 --> 00:27:51,641
and stuff like that and does
things around the house.
529
00:27:51,641 --> 00:27:53,401
- We don't get over the England very often
530
00:27:53,401 --> 00:27:56,241
and so you can count on
one hand how many times
531
00:27:56,241 --> 00:27:59,121
you're gonna see your
family before somebody dies.
532
00:28:00,401 --> 00:28:05,001
And that's getting more and
more pressing every time
533
00:28:05,001 --> 00:28:09,961
we come; you know, so yeah this is tricky.
534
00:28:11,121 --> 00:28:12,561
- How are they doing?
535
00:28:12,561 --> 00:28:16,601
- Not well, they're very old.
536
00:28:20,681 --> 00:28:25,321
Yeah I don't really want to
elaborate on that and you know.
537
00:28:25,321 --> 00:28:28,321
- But it's
full of emotion all this?
538
00:28:29,361 --> 00:28:31,241
- It's all the stuff
that we repress as hard
539
00:28:31,241 --> 00:28:36,241
as we can isn't it, but yeah it really is.
540
00:28:45,001 --> 00:28:46,641
I'm looking at these
names and who they all are
541
00:28:46,641 --> 00:28:50,401
but this of course is Granny
Hitchon and Grandpa Hitchon.
542
00:28:51,801 --> 00:28:54,041
When I was a little guy I
got up at the crack of dawn
543
00:28:54,041 --> 00:28:57,681
and scooted next door to
spend the morning with her.
544
00:28:58,601 --> 00:29:03,601
So yes when she died when
I was five or six I think,
545
00:29:04,761 --> 00:29:08,481
so I think I was devastated yeah.
546
00:29:08,481 --> 00:29:10,201
- And you still remember her?
547
00:29:10,201 --> 00:29:14,521
- Absolutely, yeah, yeah.
548
00:29:17,561 --> 00:29:19,481
- I know you should let these things out
549
00:29:19,481 --> 00:29:23,601
and I don't I store them up but that's
550
00:29:23,601 --> 00:29:26,721
the character of me now
and I can't change it.
551
00:29:26,721 --> 00:29:27,761
- Thank you very much.
552
00:29:27,761 --> 00:29:29,841
- Oh yes, thank you yes.
553
00:29:29,841 --> 00:29:32,481
Nick is truly English.
554
00:29:32,481 --> 00:29:37,281
I mean my father is
English and I was probably
555
00:29:37,281 --> 00:29:39,721
in my late twenties maybe early thirties
556
00:29:39,721 --> 00:29:42,401
before I uttered the words I love you
557
00:29:42,401 --> 00:29:43,801
to either one of my parents.
558
00:29:45,841 --> 00:29:48,681
There is a difference, a
distinct difference between
559
00:29:49,721 --> 00:29:52,761
the type of English
person he is and the type
560
00:29:52,761 --> 00:29:54,801
of American people I've been with.
561
00:29:54,801 --> 00:29:58,401
So I don't, you may
know the difference too
562
00:29:58,401 --> 00:30:00,881
Michael because you've
been in both settings.
563
00:30:00,881 --> 00:30:03,201
♪ If I say that I love you ♪
564
00:30:03,201 --> 00:30:05,961
- What do you think
about making this programme?
565
00:30:08,561 --> 00:30:10,161
- I just think
it's just ridiculous.
566
00:30:10,161 --> 00:30:12,521
I don't see any point in doing it.
567
00:30:12,521 --> 00:30:14,201
- Why is it that we are
568
00:30:14,201 --> 00:30:16,641
so annoyed about this programme?
569
00:30:16,641 --> 00:30:18,801
- I think the problem I have is
570
00:30:18,801 --> 00:30:21,321
that you don't get a very rounded picture.
571
00:30:21,321 --> 00:30:25,081
You get the odd comment that
comes out on a particular topic
572
00:30:25,081 --> 00:30:27,641
but because of the time
restraint that this programme
573
00:30:27,641 --> 00:30:30,001
obviously has otherwise we'd be on
574
00:30:30,001 --> 00:30:31,041
for a couple of months if you were trying
575
00:30:31,041 --> 00:30:33,681
to get everybody's real
thoughts on things.
576
00:30:33,681 --> 00:30:36,641
- It's just that the
limitations of such things
577
00:30:36,641 --> 00:30:41,041
as what the audience require and the time
578
00:30:41,041 --> 00:30:42,881
don't allow it to be a real study.
579
00:30:44,201 --> 00:30:46,881
I think I'd like to say this
and I'd like to say that
580
00:30:46,881 --> 00:30:50,681
and then they film me sort
of doing all this daft stuff
581
00:30:50,681 --> 00:30:53,681
and it goes on seven days
out of every seven years.
582
00:30:53,681 --> 00:30:55,481
It's sort of biblical something or other
583
00:30:55,481 --> 00:30:59,001
and it's all this excitement and so on
584
00:30:59,001 --> 00:31:01,241
and then they present
this tiny little snippet
585
00:31:01,241 --> 00:31:04,361
of your life and it's like
that's all there is to me?
586
00:31:04,361 --> 00:31:07,881
- When I go home I go and see my mother
587
00:31:08,841 --> 00:31:11,201
and I have tea and watch TV.
588
00:31:15,281 --> 00:31:20,001
And then I do my homework
and I go and see my father.
589
00:31:21,081 --> 00:31:25,241
Were they in the sixties
trying to say that the fact
590
00:31:25,241 --> 00:31:28,641
that I'd supposedly had a
more privileged upbringing
591
00:31:28,641 --> 00:31:29,801
that I should have been the one
592
00:31:29,801 --> 00:31:32,641
who'd become the high flyer and that you--
593
00:31:32,641 --> 00:31:33,561
- Absolutely.
594
00:31:33,561 --> 00:31:36,121
- You having come, I mean I
just think that's so wrong
595
00:31:36,121 --> 00:31:38,281
but is that what they
were trying to get at?
596
00:31:39,721 --> 00:31:44,321
- The idea of looking at a
bunch of people over time
597
00:31:44,321 --> 00:31:48,481
and how they evolve that
was a really nifty idea.
598
00:31:48,481 --> 00:31:53,481
It isn't a picture really of
the essence of Nick or Suzy.
599
00:31:53,481 --> 00:31:55,761
It's a picture of everyman.
600
00:31:56,721 --> 00:32:01,721
It's how a person any
person, how they change.
601
00:32:02,001 --> 00:32:04,801
You know just seeing me this age
602
00:32:04,801 --> 00:32:07,281
and the next age with
more wrinkles and more oh.
603
00:32:10,241 --> 00:32:12,521
- I think we all have got a few of those.
604
00:32:12,521 --> 00:32:13,721
- Oops.
605
00:32:13,721 --> 00:32:14,681
- Oops
606
00:32:14,681 --> 00:32:18,441
- It's not an absolute
accurate picture of me
607
00:32:18,441 --> 00:32:22,641
but it's a picture of somebody
and that's the value of it.
608
00:32:22,641 --> 00:32:26,801
- But then we're putting
ourselves out to be that person.
609
00:32:27,681 --> 00:32:31,401
I didn't want to do it when I was 14.
610
00:32:31,401 --> 00:32:34,521
I know I was very difficult
because I was very anti
611
00:32:34,521 --> 00:32:36,361
doing it; I was pressurised in to doing it
612
00:32:36,361 --> 00:32:43,361
by my parents and I hated it and I vowed
613
00:32:43,441 --> 00:32:47,001
I'd never do it now but here I am.
614
00:32:47,001 --> 00:32:48,801
I mean who knows in seven years
615
00:32:48,801 --> 00:32:50,801
whether it will be done again
616
00:32:50,801 --> 00:32:55,801
but this is me saying hopefully I'll reach
617
00:32:57,161 --> 00:33:01,641
my half century next
year and I shall bow out.
618
00:33:03,881 --> 00:33:05,161
I don't know what happened.
619
00:33:05,161 --> 00:33:07,321
I was quite adamant I
wasn't going to do it
620
00:33:08,641 --> 00:33:13,521
and then, I don't know I suppose I have
621
00:33:13,521 --> 00:33:18,521
this ridiculous sense of loyalty
to it even though I hate it
622
00:33:19,401 --> 00:33:22,201
and that's just such a
contradiction isn't it?
623
00:33:23,321 --> 00:33:31,321
But, and also I think it's
like reading a bad book.
624
00:33:31,401 --> 00:33:33,001
I'll still read it.
625
00:33:33,001 --> 00:33:36,841
I'll still see it through and
I guess I'll put this down
626
00:33:36,841 --> 00:33:39,841
to being a bad book but
I'll see it through.
627
00:33:54,641 --> 00:33:57,161
- Symon was brought
up in a children's home,
628
00:33:57,161 --> 00:33:59,321
the only child of a single parent.
629
00:34:01,521 --> 00:34:04,321
- They say where's your father then?
630
00:34:04,321 --> 00:34:05,801
You know, when your mum's out at work?
631
00:34:05,801 --> 00:34:07,921
They say where's your father?
632
00:34:07,921 --> 00:34:10,041
And I just tell them I ain't got one.
633
00:34:10,041 --> 00:34:12,481
See, I can get on well
with my mother sometimes.
634
00:34:15,601 --> 00:34:16,721
We talk very well with each other
635
00:34:16,721 --> 00:34:19,961
but it's sometimes not quite as mother
636
00:34:19,961 --> 00:34:22,081
and son, sort of more like friends.
637
00:34:23,641 --> 00:34:27,441
- When he was 34
Symon's mother died of cancer.
638
00:34:28,561 --> 00:34:32,161
- There was so many things I
never actually said to my mum
639
00:34:32,161 --> 00:34:36,001
that, just things you
think about afterwards
640
00:34:36,001 --> 00:34:38,401
it's too late because
they're not there anymore.
641
00:34:39,601 --> 00:34:41,601
- What sort of things?
642
00:34:41,601 --> 00:34:43,721
- I don't know, just I love you every day.
643
00:34:45,601 --> 00:34:48,721
When I was born, an illegitimate child,
644
00:34:48,721 --> 00:34:52,841
that's something that's
only whispered about.
645
00:34:52,841 --> 00:34:56,561
People feel strongly
about it in those days
646
00:34:56,561 --> 00:35:01,561
but nowadays it's not a serious matter.
647
00:35:02,441 --> 00:35:04,081
The serious point is whether you
648
00:35:04,081 --> 00:35:06,641
stay with somebody or you leave them.
649
00:35:06,641 --> 00:35:11,641
Since 21 I've got married,
had a couple of kids.
650
00:35:15,481 --> 00:35:17,241
- By 28 he had married
651
00:35:17,241 --> 00:35:20,001
Yvonne and they had five children.
652
00:35:20,961 --> 00:35:24,561
- They've got everything; they've
even got what I never had.
653
00:35:26,201 --> 00:35:27,041
- Which is what?
654
00:35:27,041 --> 00:35:28,081
- A father isn't it?
655
00:35:28,081 --> 00:35:29,721
So I mean they've had everything.
656
00:35:32,161 --> 00:35:34,641
- By 35 they were divorced.
657
00:35:36,321 --> 00:35:39,601
- At one stage they all
stopped seeing me at all
658
00:35:39,601 --> 00:35:44,601
but now a bit older, a bit
wiser and I'm a bit older
659
00:35:45,001 --> 00:35:48,761
and wiser and now three of them see me.
660
00:35:53,201 --> 00:35:56,521
- At 42 he'd married Vienetta.
661
00:35:58,281 --> 00:35:59,681
- We used to go out when we were younger.
662
00:35:59,681 --> 00:36:01,201
We met in the launderette.
663
00:36:02,481 --> 00:36:03,721
- Once a week.
664
00:36:03,721 --> 00:36:05,561
- Once a week in the launderette.
665
00:36:05,561 --> 00:36:07,441
- Vienetta
already had a daughter,
666
00:36:07,441 --> 00:36:10,761
Miriam, and she and
Symon had a son Daniel.
667
00:36:15,561 --> 00:36:17,601
Is there anything of you in him?
668
00:36:17,601 --> 00:36:20,921
His dashing good looks yeah, that's me
669
00:36:20,921 --> 00:36:23,041
and his love of sport as well.
670
00:36:27,081 --> 00:36:30,521
Well today is Daniel's big, big day.
671
00:36:30,521 --> 00:36:39,401
He's now 18 and he's a young
man, he says, and he's done
672
00:36:39,481 --> 00:36:43,161
very, very well with his
schooling and everything.
673
00:36:43,161 --> 00:36:45,401
- At the beginning of the
week I received an email
674
00:36:45,401 --> 00:36:47,401
saying that I got on to my apprenticeship
675
00:36:47,401 --> 00:36:49,761
with Proctor and Gamble,
which I'm very happy
676
00:36:49,761 --> 00:36:51,881
and excited about and I start that
677
00:36:51,881 --> 00:36:53,641
in the next couple of weeks.
678
00:37:02,561 --> 00:37:06,161
- What I want to say is that
I have had the proudest week
679
00:37:06,161 --> 00:37:11,161
of my life with my son passing his exams.
680
00:37:12,681 --> 00:37:15,081
He's passed his test and if when
681
00:37:15,081 --> 00:37:17,921
and he runs through it he might get a car.
682
00:37:21,321 --> 00:37:27,961
♪ Happy Birthday to you ♪
683
00:37:29,961 --> 00:37:34,081
- But here people are undecided about you.
684
00:37:34,081 --> 00:37:37,841
They can be your friend
one day and not the next.
685
00:37:37,841 --> 00:37:38,801
- Obviously when children come in
686
00:37:38,801 --> 00:37:40,241
to foster care family and friends
687
00:37:40,241 --> 00:37:41,641
are involved as well and we have
688
00:37:41,641 --> 00:37:43,921
to ensure the children
are kept safe and secure.
689
00:37:43,921 --> 00:37:46,241
- By 49 Symon and Vienetta
690
00:37:46,241 --> 00:37:48,761
had decided to train as foster parents.
691
00:37:48,761 --> 00:37:51,321
- I went to boarding
school when I was young
692
00:37:51,321 --> 00:37:54,641
and I always felt that
that was regimental.
693
00:37:55,481 --> 00:37:58,561
It didn't allow for
personal care, for loving
694
00:37:58,561 --> 00:38:01,881
from the adult carers so I wanted to do
695
00:38:01,881 --> 00:38:04,641
something like that for
myself in my own home.
696
00:38:06,441 --> 00:38:08,801
- And we always say to foster
carers please do not cut
697
00:38:08,801 --> 00:38:11,801
the children's hair without
the permission of the parents.
698
00:38:11,801 --> 00:38:12,841
- So what's the toughest
699
00:38:12,841 --> 00:38:14,641
thing about being a foster parent?
700
00:38:15,961 --> 00:38:18,681
- You're taking a chance when you do it
701
00:38:18,681 --> 00:38:21,401
because you really don't
know what you're getting.
702
00:38:22,441 --> 00:38:26,241
It's something that all
children want is to be loved,
703
00:38:26,241 --> 00:38:28,721
is to be wanted so if you can give
704
00:38:28,721 --> 00:38:32,521
that to them then
everything else is second.
705
00:38:33,481 --> 00:38:35,721
- You know why Uncle Symon looks younger?
706
00:38:35,721 --> 00:38:37,161
'Cause he's so laid back.
707
00:38:37,161 --> 00:38:38,681
Some of them come back, they ring you up
708
00:38:38,681 --> 00:38:41,041
and say hello Auntie, hello
Uncle and how are you?
709
00:38:41,041 --> 00:38:42,241
They come and have Sunday dinner.
710
00:38:42,241 --> 00:38:44,081
They come and visit us which is good.
711
00:38:45,761 --> 00:38:47,121
- I once tried to count
712
00:38:47,121 --> 00:38:49,641
and I got up to 64 and I stopped.
713
00:38:49,641 --> 00:38:50,841
- Because if you know that you're
714
00:38:50,841 --> 00:38:53,881
going to get 50 people
that Auntie kinda called.
715
00:38:53,881 --> 00:38:55,081
She's like a mother to me.
716
00:38:55,081 --> 00:38:56,761
She's always been there.
717
00:38:57,801 --> 00:38:59,441
There was a time where I
felt like I want to give up
718
00:38:59,441 --> 00:39:02,081
in everything and she kept saying to me
719
00:39:02,081 --> 00:39:05,201
"you have to keep on going,
you have to keep on trying."
720
00:39:07,321 --> 00:39:09,881
I'm getting emotional, sorry.
721
00:39:09,881 --> 00:39:12,401
- When I came through
the airport my family
722
00:39:12,401 --> 00:39:14,321
wasn't at the airport
to collect me and that
723
00:39:14,321 --> 00:39:18,441
so I just had to stay
somewhere for a temporary base.
724
00:39:19,481 --> 00:39:23,401
I was here for I think
about five to six years.
725
00:39:23,401 --> 00:39:25,121
I couldn't have asked for
anything better to be honest.
726
00:39:25,121 --> 00:39:26,521
Yeah they were really, yeah really nice.
727
00:39:29,241 --> 00:39:31,241
- Were you
looked after at some point?
728
00:39:31,241 --> 00:39:35,801
- My real mother died at
birth and my dad remarried
729
00:39:35,801 --> 00:39:39,321
and my mother who made
me the person I am today
730
00:39:39,321 --> 00:39:41,721
'cause she was always
helping other young people
731
00:39:42,561 --> 00:39:45,681
and she used to always say to
us, "don't be jealous 'cause
732
00:39:45,681 --> 00:39:48,561
you've got my love but they've
got no one to love them."
733
00:39:49,401 --> 00:39:50,241
You know?
734
00:39:51,361 --> 00:39:53,921
- As well as fostering Vienetta
735
00:39:53,921 --> 00:39:56,321
also works for an organisation that takes
736
00:39:56,321 --> 00:39:58,681
homeless young people off the streets.
737
00:40:02,281 --> 00:40:04,081
- And what happens
to the fostering children
738
00:40:04,081 --> 00:40:06,081
when you're here four days?
739
00:40:06,081 --> 00:40:09,401
- Symon and I balance
them together, we juggle.
740
00:40:09,401 --> 00:40:11,721
Symon sometimes works
late and then I rush home.
741
00:40:11,721 --> 00:40:13,001
He'll do the school run in the morning.
742
00:40:13,001 --> 00:40:15,321
I'll do the school run in the afternoon.
743
00:40:15,321 --> 00:40:16,641
My job's very flexible.
744
00:40:18,281 --> 00:40:20,561
- So you have
incredibly busy life don't you?
745
00:40:20,561 --> 00:40:21,521
- Very busy.
746
00:40:27,401 --> 00:40:30,481
- Well we started to feel
that we were getting tense
747
00:40:30,481 --> 00:40:33,641
and tight and that normally
means you need a holiday
748
00:40:33,641 --> 00:40:37,001
'cause we found ourselves doing too much
749
00:40:37,001 --> 00:40:40,441
so at some stage you gotta chill out.
750
00:40:42,081 --> 00:40:44,841
- Symon took
the family to Portugal.
751
00:40:44,841 --> 00:40:45,761
- Oh look at this.
752
00:40:45,761 --> 00:40:46,641
- So that's nice.
753
00:40:46,641 --> 00:40:48,801
- That's quite, what do you think?
754
00:40:48,801 --> 00:40:49,601
- It's blingy.
755
00:40:49,601 --> 00:40:50,961
- That's really nice.
756
00:40:50,961 --> 00:40:53,881
- So Jess is
by your first marriage
757
00:40:53,881 --> 00:40:55,761
and Mini's your child--
758
00:40:55,761 --> 00:40:56,601
- Yes
759
00:40:56,601 --> 00:40:58,241
- By your marriage.
760
00:40:58,241 --> 00:41:00,481
And the relationship's strong?
761
00:41:00,481 --> 00:41:02,201
- They know each
other from being young.
762
00:41:02,201 --> 00:41:04,401
They did things together,
went out together.
763
00:41:05,321 --> 00:41:07,321
So they're not like strangers.
764
00:41:07,321 --> 00:41:11,641
- Before I'm old enough to get a job
765
00:41:11,641 --> 00:41:16,161
I just walk around and
see what I can find.
766
00:41:16,161 --> 00:41:20,121
I was going to be a film
star but now I'm going
767
00:41:20,121 --> 00:41:24,321
to be an electrical engineer
which is more to reality.
768
00:41:25,401 --> 00:41:28,561
- By 21 Symon was
working in the freezer room
769
00:41:28,561 --> 00:41:31,121
of Wall's Sausages in London.
770
00:41:31,121 --> 00:41:33,081
- I know I can't stay at Wall's forever.
771
00:41:33,081 --> 00:41:34,481
I mean it's just not me.
772
00:41:34,481 --> 00:41:37,721
I couldn't stay there for that
long, my mind will go dead.
773
00:41:38,881 --> 00:41:40,841
- Do you never
feel that you should be doing
774
00:41:40,841 --> 00:41:43,641
better jobs than these, aren't
you worth more than this?
775
00:41:43,641 --> 00:41:46,081
- No, I haven't really, I suppose
776
00:41:46,081 --> 00:41:47,841
I just like hard work I don't know.
777
00:41:49,081 --> 00:41:51,441
- The factory closed down.
778
00:41:51,441 --> 00:41:52,761
Since then he has worked near
779
00:41:52,761 --> 00:41:54,921
Heathrow Airport handling freight.
780
00:41:56,881 --> 00:41:59,801
- If I'd pushed myself at school
781
00:41:59,801 --> 00:42:01,801
probably I could have done a lot better.
782
00:42:02,681 --> 00:42:05,121
- Does that give
you pause for thought?
783
00:42:06,361 --> 00:42:09,321
- No that means I was a
lazy sod when I was younger.
784
00:42:09,321 --> 00:42:11,321
- If we had got together when
we should have got together
785
00:42:11,321 --> 00:42:13,761
there's no way he'd have
been a forklift driver
786
00:42:13,761 --> 00:42:18,121
not where I am with no way,
not with all that brains.
787
00:42:18,121 --> 00:42:21,121
I've got common sense
and he's got the brains.
788
00:42:21,961 --> 00:42:25,961
- I am the proof that you need
to push yourself and go on.
789
00:42:25,961 --> 00:42:28,001
If you want to get on if
you want things in life
790
00:42:28,001 --> 00:42:30,481
you have to push yourself to keep going.
791
00:42:31,801 --> 00:42:34,121
I should have been an accountant,
792
00:42:34,121 --> 00:42:36,241
but I went in this office,
793
00:42:36,241 --> 00:42:38,721
I looked at this grey, grubby office
794
00:42:38,721 --> 00:42:43,361
and the people there looked
gray-suited and miserable
795
00:42:43,361 --> 00:42:45,521
and I thought this isn't for me.
796
00:42:46,521 --> 00:42:49,521
I want to stay out in the
fresh air, I don't want this.
797
00:42:49,521 --> 00:42:52,601
Years later I realised that
not every office is like that.
798
00:42:52,601 --> 00:42:54,721
Some offices are vibrant and moving
799
00:42:55,881 --> 00:42:58,041
but it was too late
then I'd already sort of
800
00:42:59,161 --> 00:43:01,641
stagnated myself driving forklifts
801
00:43:01,641 --> 00:43:03,961
and working in a warehouse.
802
00:43:03,961 --> 00:43:04,801
- You could have made
803
00:43:04,801 --> 00:43:06,081
a lot of money being an accountant.
804
00:43:07,401 --> 00:43:08,401
- Yes he could have.
805
00:43:09,601 --> 00:43:11,241
- She looks after me.
806
00:43:11,241 --> 00:43:13,441
She doesn't just push
me she looks after me.
807
00:43:14,561 --> 00:43:17,361
She would never let
anything be wrong for me.
808
00:43:17,361 --> 00:43:20,961
- Baked beans, I'll go and get the water.
809
00:43:20,961 --> 00:43:23,001
- At one stage we went
to a marriage guidance
810
00:43:23,001 --> 00:43:26,001
'cause the pressures of being together
811
00:43:27,241 --> 00:43:29,041
were getting to us because we are
812
00:43:29,041 --> 00:43:30,641
two completely different people.
813
00:43:31,721 --> 00:43:36,721
I'm very laid-back, as she always says
814
00:43:37,641 --> 00:43:40,121
if I go any further back I'll fall over.
815
00:43:41,681 --> 00:43:44,441
- Is the chemistry
still there between you?
816
00:43:44,441 --> 00:43:45,281
- Yeah.
817
00:43:45,281 --> 00:43:46,121
- Yeah I think so.
818
00:43:46,121 --> 00:43:48,121
- Yeah I hope so, is it?
819
00:43:48,121 --> 00:43:48,961
- Yes darling.
820
00:43:48,961 --> 00:43:51,041
- Yeah the chemistry's still there.
821
00:43:51,041 --> 00:43:54,081
- Yeah, we've been saying
that, what nearly twenty years?
822
00:43:54,921 --> 00:43:55,961
- Is that all it is?
823
00:43:55,961 --> 00:43:56,801
- Yeah.
824
00:44:00,441 --> 00:44:02,641
Oh come on Symon hurry up, catch up.
825
00:44:02,641 --> 00:44:04,921
- Come on Jess and Daniel.
826
00:44:06,481 --> 00:44:07,721
- Do you think you could
827
00:44:07,721 --> 00:44:09,521
ever retire and ever just chill out?
828
00:44:10,441 --> 00:44:13,361
- There's people who
I have noticed they stop work
829
00:44:14,281 --> 00:44:18,641
and they have no other
interests, they suddenly get old.
830
00:44:18,641 --> 00:44:20,721
- Yeah so you're
old. you've got a few bulges
831
00:44:20,721 --> 00:44:24,921
a few wrinkles but life
still goes on, enjoy life.
832
00:44:27,121 --> 00:44:28,281
- So who won?
833
00:44:29,121 --> 00:44:31,241
I came here first: I think that was me.
834
00:44:35,841 --> 00:44:38,441
- How was it then?
835
00:44:38,441 --> 00:44:40,761
- Beautiful, did I win and just allow you
836
00:44:40,761 --> 00:44:41,601
to come in front of me?
837
00:44:41,601 --> 00:44:42,961
- No, no.
838
00:44:42,961 --> 00:44:44,401
- Dad you was like the person
839
00:44:44,401 --> 00:44:46,241
that comes round on the tractor.
840
00:44:46,241 --> 00:44:50,121
- I think I admire people
with great determination,
841
00:44:50,121 --> 00:44:52,961
like people who have just
come up from nothing.
842
00:44:52,961 --> 00:44:55,561
They build up their life
from absolutely nothing.
843
00:44:57,121 --> 00:44:59,801
- Well do you see
some parts of life as success
844
00:44:59,801 --> 00:45:03,081
and some parts are failure or
do you not think like that?
845
00:45:04,041 --> 00:45:04,841
- No you don't stop life
846
00:45:04,841 --> 00:45:06,921
because you've made a mistake, you know.
847
00:45:06,921 --> 00:45:08,841
- Though it may
go down the wrong road
848
00:45:08,841 --> 00:45:10,601
it doesn't mean that's the
end of the road for you.
849
00:45:10,601 --> 00:45:11,641
There's another chance you have
850
00:45:11,641 --> 00:45:15,001
to turn round and come back
and start again isn't there?
851
00:45:15,001 --> 00:45:17,881
- Do a U-turn and to be honest
852
00:45:17,881 --> 00:45:19,721
what do you think about our life?
853
00:45:19,721 --> 00:45:20,841
- I think there's
been more ups than downs
854
00:45:20,841 --> 00:45:24,521
and hopefully there's
a lot more ups to come.
855
00:45:24,521 --> 00:45:25,681
- Yeah, yeah.
856
00:45:32,361 --> 00:45:34,801
- And what
about the other children?
857
00:45:34,801 --> 00:45:35,761
Where are they now?
858
00:45:36,801 --> 00:45:37,801
What are they doing?
859
00:45:38,681 --> 00:45:40,161
- I'm going to work in Woolworths.
860
00:45:40,161 --> 00:45:43,241
In my life I've been able to do more
861
00:45:43,241 --> 00:45:45,481
or less what I wanted to do.
862
00:45:45,481 --> 00:45:48,961
- My heart's desire is
for me to see my daddy.
863
00:45:48,961 --> 00:45:53,961
It all springs from I think
God and Christ I suppose.
864
00:45:55,761 --> 00:45:58,761
- I read the Financial Times
865
00:45:58,761 --> 00:46:00,241
- It's very irresponsible because we all
866
00:46:00,241 --> 00:46:02,081
want more money as much
money as we can get.
867
00:46:02,081 --> 00:46:04,441
- I want to be a jockey when I grow up.
868
00:46:04,441 --> 00:46:06,921
Yeah I wanna be a jockey when I grow up.
869
00:46:06,921 --> 00:46:08,561
- I'm as good or even better than most
870
00:46:08,561 --> 00:46:12,081
of them people especially,
on this programme.
68478
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