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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,020 --> 00:00:03,060 WOMAN SCREAMS 2 00:00:03,060 --> 00:00:04,700 This programme contains violent scenes 3 00:00:04,700 --> 00:00:06,900 and shocking images of the deceased from the very start 4 00:00:06,900 --> 00:00:09,860 that viewers may find distressing, very strong language from the outset, 5 00:00:09,860 --> 00:00:11,540 offensive and discriminatory attitudes, 6 00:00:11,540 --> 00:00:12,860 and scenes of a sexual nature. 7 00:00:12,860 --> 00:00:15,420 WOMAN WAILS 8 00:00:15,420 --> 00:00:18,020 What have you done?! 9 00:00:18,020 --> 00:00:20,620 WAILING CONTINUES 10 00:00:29,540 --> 00:00:31,300 SIRENS WAIL 11 00:00:33,140 --> 00:00:35,260 Monster! 12 00:00:35,260 --> 00:00:37,380 You monster! 13 00:01:30,740 --> 00:01:32,700 Oh, you little...! 14 00:01:36,220 --> 00:01:37,620 Oh, the fuck! 15 00:01:53,260 --> 00:01:54,340 Aye, aye? 16 00:01:54,340 --> 00:01:56,060 Sorry, I know. I've locked myself out. 17 00:01:56,060 --> 00:02:00,140 I was just putting something in the bin and then, click. 18 00:02:00,140 --> 00:02:02,060 So, what do you want? A ladder? 19 00:02:02,060 --> 00:02:05,860 Erm, no, I don't think I've got any windows open. 20 00:02:05,860 --> 00:02:07,980 I just need to phone my friend Stephanie. 21 00:02:07,980 --> 00:02:09,820 Remember her? My best mate? She's got a spare key. 22 00:02:09,820 --> 00:02:12,900 I mean, I've got a spare key, but guess where it is? 23 00:02:12,900 --> 00:02:15,620 In the house. Fat lot of good that is. 24 00:02:18,260 --> 00:02:20,460 Yeah, look, you'd better get in, hadn't you? 25 00:02:37,700 --> 00:02:39,460 Ah... 26 00:02:39,460 --> 00:02:41,860 Sorry, George. Got locked out. 27 00:02:41,860 --> 00:02:43,700 HE CHUCKLES 28 00:02:43,700 --> 00:02:45,780 I feel a bit stupid. 29 00:02:47,220 --> 00:02:48,740 How are you doing? How's school? 30 00:02:48,740 --> 00:02:52,740 Oh, it's college now. College! Good, well done. 31 00:02:52,740 --> 00:02:54,780 Here. 32 00:02:54,780 --> 00:02:58,300 No, but, erm... I don't know her number. 33 00:02:58,300 --> 00:03:00,020 I mean, who knows numbers any more? 34 00:03:00,020 --> 00:03:01,900 But I remember she did that charity thing with Marie. 35 00:03:01,900 --> 00:03:03,260 You know, remember? 36 00:03:03,260 --> 00:03:05,340 The kids' breakfast thing, so I thought she might have it. 37 00:03:05,340 --> 00:03:06,460 Marie's in work. 38 00:03:06,460 --> 00:03:08,500 I know. So, could you...? 39 00:03:18,460 --> 00:03:21,060 Clive? I'm busy. What is it? 40 00:03:21,060 --> 00:03:24,460 Yeah, I've got Leo from next door standing here... 41 00:03:24,460 --> 00:03:26,340 ...in his pants. 42 00:03:26,340 --> 00:03:27,620 Yeah, he's locked himself out. 43 00:03:27,620 --> 00:03:29,940 You know why that is, don't you? 44 00:03:29,940 --> 00:03:31,860 Cos Bridget was on WhatsApp two minutes ago. 45 00:03:31,860 --> 00:03:34,020 I'm trying to do my job, but it's ping, ping, ping, 46 00:03:34,020 --> 00:03:36,140 all about him from next door. 47 00:03:36,140 --> 00:03:40,140 Because do you know what she said? Guess what she saw. Bridget. 48 00:03:43,020 --> 00:03:48,140 Is that right? What do you mean, running? 49 00:03:48,140 --> 00:03:50,580 Running out of the house? Who was? 50 00:03:53,940 --> 00:03:58,020 And then what happened? Leo was running? 51 00:03:59,220 --> 00:04:01,980 Yeah, no, he said you've got his friend's number. 52 00:04:01,980 --> 00:04:06,380 That, erm... Stephanie. Yeah, yeah, that's the one, yeah. 53 00:04:06,380 --> 00:04:09,420 Yeah, no, but she's got the key, so just text it to me. 54 00:04:10,740 --> 00:04:15,140 Bridget, opposite, she says there was a man came running 55 00:04:15,140 --> 00:04:17,940 out of your house, and then you came running after him, 56 00:04:17,940 --> 00:04:20,860 but he ran off, so, er, that's how you got locked out. 57 00:04:20,860 --> 00:04:23,420 Right. Him. 58 00:04:24,700 --> 00:04:26,300 Morning. Hi. 59 00:04:26,300 --> 00:04:30,980 That was quite a night. I've never tried gooning before. 60 00:04:30,980 --> 00:04:35,060 Not as a couple. Erm, can I get you a coffee, or...? 61 00:04:35,060 --> 00:04:38,180 Yeah. Black. Thanks. 62 00:04:38,180 --> 00:04:40,940 Eddie. Leo? That's the one. 63 00:04:42,300 --> 00:04:46,940 Erm... I'd offer you some toast, but I don't have anything in. 64 00:04:46,940 --> 00:04:50,900 I wasn't expecting anyone overnight. Kind of surprised me. 65 00:04:50,900 --> 00:04:52,180 Not that I'm complaining. 66 00:04:55,820 --> 00:04:57,340 Don't you dare! 67 00:05:02,420 --> 00:05:03,660 Little...! 68 00:05:03,660 --> 00:05:08,300 That was my friend, erm, Eddie. And he was staying with me. 69 00:05:08,300 --> 00:05:13,620 And, he went, I waved him goodbye, and that's when I, er, 70 00:05:13,620 --> 00:05:16,700 took out the paper, stuff, things for the bin. 71 00:05:18,500 --> 00:05:20,140 PHONE DINGS 72 00:05:20,140 --> 00:05:21,180 Oh, well. 73 00:05:22,660 --> 00:05:23,740 Stephanie. 74 00:05:28,300 --> 00:05:31,860 I know, but I'm in my pants and I have to open up at work. 75 00:05:31,860 --> 00:05:37,100 I know you're busy, I'm sorry, but... Hold on. 76 00:05:37,100 --> 00:05:39,340 Fuck you doing? 77 00:05:39,340 --> 00:05:42,540 Erm, I got, I got locked out. 78 00:05:42,540 --> 00:05:45,140 You weirdo. 79 00:05:45,140 --> 00:05:48,660 Steph, Steph, I'll take us away at Christmas, 80 00:05:48,660 --> 00:05:50,260 I swear, I'll pay, just get me out of here. 81 00:05:57,580 --> 00:06:00,180 Right, good. Er, she has a key. 82 00:06:00,180 --> 00:06:02,860 Saul, I don't think you should be naked in front of Mr Struthers. 83 00:06:02,860 --> 00:06:04,340 Don't bother me. Yeah, well it bothers me, 84 00:06:04,340 --> 00:06:05,660 so go and get some clothes on, eh? 85 00:06:09,020 --> 00:06:10,300 Ey-yo! Hey! 86 00:06:10,300 --> 00:06:12,900 - Oh. - That's enough. GEORGE LAUGHS 87 00:06:12,900 --> 00:06:14,300 I apologise for my son. 88 00:06:15,820 --> 00:06:17,100 Thanks. 89 00:06:22,580 --> 00:06:24,260 Stephanie will be around about 20 minutes. 90 00:06:24,260 --> 00:06:26,580 She's wrapping something up at work and then she's coming over. 91 00:06:26,580 --> 00:06:27,740 Just put the keys in an Uber. 92 00:06:27,740 --> 00:06:29,100 Ah, she thinks they're all anti-union, 93 00:06:29,100 --> 00:06:31,580 she won't touch them, so... All right if I just wait here? 94 00:06:31,580 --> 00:06:33,540 No. 95 00:06:33,540 --> 00:06:35,660 OK, it's just for 20 minutes. 96 00:06:35,660 --> 00:06:37,740 Yeah, no, I need to get to work in a bit. 97 00:06:37,740 --> 00:06:39,180 I could just sit and watch TV. 98 00:06:39,180 --> 00:06:41,500 George, what time are you at college? 11. 99 00:06:41,500 --> 00:06:43,620 Yeah, you can't sit here with him. 100 00:06:43,620 --> 00:06:45,420 Why not? 101 00:06:45,420 --> 00:06:46,540 He's 16. 102 00:07:07,620 --> 00:07:08,820 Hey. 103 00:07:09,900 --> 00:07:13,060 God. Where'd you get the jacket? 104 00:07:13,060 --> 00:07:16,460 Oh, Clive next door, and he was not happy, let me tell you. 105 00:07:16,460 --> 00:07:19,100 His wife was always angry. 106 00:07:19,100 --> 00:07:22,220 I'm surprised they're still together after what happened. 107 00:07:22,220 --> 00:07:25,460 It was a hook-up called Eddie. He nicked my laptop and ran off. 108 00:07:25,460 --> 00:07:27,420 I ran after him and got locked out. 109 00:07:53,540 --> 00:07:54,620 I'm disgraceful. 110 00:07:54,620 --> 00:07:56,700 You're lucky. Could've been a lot worse. 111 00:07:56,700 --> 00:07:59,580 I mean, you're 60 next year. God's sake. 112 00:07:59,580 --> 00:08:01,500 I'm allowed to have fun. 113 00:08:01,500 --> 00:08:03,100 What, like this? Really? 114 00:08:04,700 --> 00:08:06,020 He's not coming back, Steph. 115 00:08:07,660 --> 00:08:12,460 Did you see on Instagram? Curtis in Italy, with her. 116 00:08:12,460 --> 00:08:13,980 So, why were you surprised? 117 00:08:13,980 --> 00:08:17,260 What happened next door with Clive Goss, Goss the Boss? 118 00:08:17,260 --> 00:08:19,060 He slept with someone else. 119 00:08:19,060 --> 00:08:20,180 Did he? 120 00:08:20,180 --> 00:08:23,380 On holiday, in a caravan park. Ew! 121 00:08:23,380 --> 00:08:27,300 I mean, imagine. I mean, what else is there to do but fuck around? 122 00:08:28,780 --> 00:08:33,380 If you think about it, they've got a son who's, what, 25? 123 00:08:33,380 --> 00:08:35,300 But the other one's only 15. 16. 124 00:08:35,300 --> 00:08:38,460 So, that age gap means marriage in crisis. 125 00:08:38,460 --> 00:08:41,020 Having another child never fixes anything. 126 00:08:41,020 --> 00:08:42,460 You eat too much cheese. 127 00:08:42,460 --> 00:08:44,580 Well, not any more. 128 00:08:45,860 --> 00:08:47,260 How's work? 129 00:08:47,260 --> 00:08:51,020 It's insane, thanks to you lot. 130 00:08:51,020 --> 00:08:53,300 What does that mean? 131 00:08:53,300 --> 00:08:56,340 Well, it's all your fault, isn't it? What is? 132 00:08:58,980 --> 00:09:03,140 We got this kid in care now, he arrived in Britain in December, 133 00:09:03,140 --> 00:09:06,140 but he's on that scheme, so there's no records. 134 00:09:06,140 --> 00:09:12,540 Says he's 14. Is he fuck 14? He's got a moustache. He's got a beard. 135 00:09:12,540 --> 00:09:14,780 He's 21, at least. 136 00:09:14,780 --> 00:09:17,700 But he says he's 14, so 14 it is. 137 00:09:17,700 --> 00:09:22,340 And he is in there with kids, and he's taking the boys out drinking. 138 00:09:23,900 --> 00:09:27,260 Don't tell me there's no drugs. There are drugs. 139 00:09:27,260 --> 00:09:31,660 But it's the way he looks at the girls. 140 00:09:31,660 --> 00:09:32,900 And he's always outside the bathroom, 141 00:09:32,900 --> 00:09:35,900 every time a girl has a shower, standing there, grinning. 142 00:09:35,900 --> 00:09:40,020 But that's just the beginning, cos this boy, this man, 143 00:09:40,020 --> 00:09:42,820 is on top of the list to be fostered, 144 00:09:42,820 --> 00:09:45,580 which means I have to process that application. 145 00:09:45,580 --> 00:09:49,740 And these foster families, they've got daughters. 146 00:09:49,740 --> 00:09:53,020 But what do I tell them? I can't warn them. 147 00:09:53,020 --> 00:09:55,380 I'm not allowed. Cos he says he's 14, 148 00:09:55,380 --> 00:10:00,380 and therefore it's a fact. So, what can I do? Nothing. 149 00:10:00,380 --> 00:10:02,340 And how is this my fault? 150 00:10:02,340 --> 00:10:06,460 He self-identifies, which you lot invented. 151 00:10:06,460 --> 00:10:07,740 Thanks very much. 152 00:10:23,300 --> 00:10:24,660 Hey, how you doing? 153 00:10:26,020 --> 00:10:28,660 Susette, love of my life. It would never work. 154 00:10:28,660 --> 00:10:29,740 Thank God. 155 00:10:29,740 --> 00:10:30,980 Hey, you. Hiya. 156 00:10:36,820 --> 00:10:37,900 Oof. 157 00:10:49,220 --> 00:10:50,260 Morning. 158 00:10:51,460 --> 00:10:52,780 What time do you call this? 159 00:10:52,780 --> 00:10:55,420 Judy had to open up, boss. I was waiting outside. 160 00:10:55,420 --> 00:10:58,500 Hello, Zee. Morning, everybody. 161 00:10:58,500 --> 00:10:59,620 Morning, boss. 162 00:10:59,620 --> 00:11:03,300 So, I finished here last night, was going to go straight home, 163 00:11:03,300 --> 00:11:06,500 then I thought, "Oh, quick little snifter at Monroe's." 164 00:11:06,500 --> 00:11:10,100 Met a man called Eddie. Tall, thin, hot. 165 00:11:10,100 --> 00:11:13,780 Chat, chat, chat. 90 minutes later, took him home. 166 00:11:13,780 --> 00:11:17,660 You didn't! I did. Wild sex. I will draw a veil. 167 00:11:17,660 --> 00:11:20,020 Then this morning we get up, go downstairs, 168 00:11:20,020 --> 00:11:23,340 he grabs my laptop, and runs into the street. 169 00:11:23,340 --> 00:11:25,460 I run after him, the door closes behind me, 170 00:11:25,460 --> 00:11:28,820 I'm locked out of my own house, stark naked. No way! 171 00:11:28,820 --> 00:11:32,140 Yeah, Stark bollock naked in the street. 172 00:11:32,140 --> 00:11:34,260 All I could do was steal a garden gnome from next door 173 00:11:34,260 --> 00:11:35,420 to hide my privates. 174 00:11:35,420 --> 00:11:36,740 THEY LAUGH 175 00:11:36,740 --> 00:11:40,220 I swear to God. I'm in the middle of the street, my arse hanging out 176 00:11:40,220 --> 00:11:42,660 and a garden gnome hiding my Kemi Badenochs. 177 00:11:43,940 --> 00:11:46,060 Wait, there's more, there's more. 178 00:11:46,060 --> 00:11:48,980 So I go next door, there's the neighbour's son 179 00:11:48,980 --> 00:11:52,460 fresh out of the shower, dripping. Oof. 180 00:11:52,460 --> 00:11:57,540 25 years old, pink, wet, topless. Well, I tell you - 181 00:11:57,540 --> 00:11:59,980 all of a sudden, that garden gnome had a fishing rod. 182 00:11:59,980 --> 00:12:01,140 THEY LAUGH 183 00:12:01,140 --> 00:12:04,780 What a start to the day. I thank you. 184 00:12:04,780 --> 00:12:06,860 CHEERS AND APPLAUSE 185 00:12:15,660 --> 00:12:18,100 Hanna, what happened yesterday? 186 00:12:18,100 --> 00:12:19,140 I had a headache. 187 00:12:19,140 --> 00:12:22,100 Well, that is what the sick line is for. 188 00:12:22,100 --> 00:12:24,220 You don't ask Tania to pass on a message, 189 00:12:24,220 --> 00:12:26,860 you phone the sick line, because I've always got it, 190 00:12:26,860 --> 00:12:28,140 if I don't have it Judy's got it, 191 00:12:28,140 --> 00:12:31,580 and we need to know properly so we can get cover. Understood? 192 00:12:31,580 --> 00:12:33,300 Yep. Good. What? 193 00:12:33,300 --> 00:12:35,020 This is Frederic. He's been waiting. 194 00:12:35,020 --> 00:12:37,100 You were supposed to interview him at half past. 195 00:12:37,100 --> 00:12:38,860 Oh, right. Right. 196 00:12:38,860 --> 00:12:42,980 Ah, first customer of the day. Morning, Melba. The usual. 197 00:12:42,980 --> 00:12:46,540 Louise, can you sort out the dame? Thank you. I'm on it. 198 00:12:46,540 --> 00:12:49,460 So, Frederico, have you worked in a bar before? 199 00:12:49,460 --> 00:12:51,060 Yeah, I did two weeks at Pinnacle. 200 00:12:51,060 --> 00:12:53,460 Why'd you leave? Well, they sacked me. 201 00:12:53,460 --> 00:12:55,740 Good start. All right, let's do this on the hoof. 202 00:12:55,740 --> 00:12:56,780 Come behind the bar. Come on. 203 00:12:58,020 --> 00:13:00,420 So, what did Pinnacle pay you? Ten. 204 00:13:00,420 --> 00:13:02,780 We pay 12, but that means you have to work for it. 205 00:13:02,780 --> 00:13:06,100 So, come on, show me. Get me a WKD, a gin and tonic, 206 00:13:06,100 --> 00:13:07,820 and a vodka lime, both with ice. 207 00:13:07,820 --> 00:13:11,100 Except we don't have any ice. Mikey, can you get the ice? 208 00:13:11,100 --> 00:13:12,460 On it, boss man. 209 00:13:12,460 --> 00:13:14,700 Basically, we're a speed bar. We don't do cocktails. 210 00:13:14,700 --> 00:13:17,700 Nearest thing we do is a blue lagoon, but not from a shaker. 211 00:13:17,700 --> 00:13:18,740 We don't have time for that. 212 00:13:18,740 --> 00:13:19,820 Just pour it straight into the glass. 213 00:13:19,820 --> 00:13:22,660 Do you know what's in a blue lagoon? No. 214 00:13:22,660 --> 00:13:24,700 Vodka, curacao, and lemonade. 215 00:13:25,700 --> 00:13:27,220 So, what do you do? Are you a student? Yeah. 216 00:13:27,220 --> 00:13:28,860 What are you studying? Philosophy. 217 00:13:28,860 --> 00:13:30,860 Ooh, philosophy. 218 00:13:30,860 --> 00:13:33,300 You know my philosophy? I can imagine. 219 00:13:33,300 --> 00:13:35,540 Fuck 'em all. I was right. 220 00:13:35,540 --> 00:13:38,340 Ah! Ah... You OK? 221 00:13:38,340 --> 00:13:39,700 Electric shock. 222 00:13:39,700 --> 00:13:41,580 Ah, Zee, will you get that fuse box? 223 00:13:41,580 --> 00:13:44,580 Told you, boss, it's happening all the time. 224 00:13:44,580 --> 00:13:46,580 You all right, Freddie? It's a bit numb. 225 00:13:46,580 --> 00:13:49,500 OK, let's do a little test to see if you were listening. 226 00:13:49,500 --> 00:13:55,300 So, tell me, Fred, in a blue lagoon, there is vodka, curacao, and what? 227 00:13:55,300 --> 00:13:56,460 I've got no feeling in my hand. 228 00:13:56,460 --> 00:13:58,980 Have I lost you? 229 00:13:58,980 --> 00:14:00,420 It really shocked me. 230 00:14:02,420 --> 00:14:05,580 OK, all right. Er, do you want a little lie down 231 00:14:05,580 --> 00:14:08,340 and a glass of water, Freddie? Hanna, get this boy a seat. 232 00:14:08,340 --> 00:14:10,140 Go on, put your feet up, young man. 233 00:14:10,140 --> 00:14:12,540 You HAVE just survived death by fridge. 234 00:14:12,540 --> 00:14:14,860 Yeah, I am a bit unsteady. Come and sit here. 235 00:14:18,260 --> 00:14:20,260 Zee, will you have a word with Hanna? 236 00:14:20,260 --> 00:14:22,060 She's taking the piss. She can't keep missing shifts. 237 00:14:22,060 --> 00:14:24,340 THEY'RE taking the piss, THEY keep missing shifts. 238 00:14:24,340 --> 00:14:25,460 All right! 239 00:14:25,460 --> 00:14:27,740 Oh, come on, no, boss, not you. 240 00:14:27,740 --> 00:14:28,740 Honestly, Zee. 241 00:14:29,780 --> 00:14:32,100 Your tribe's the most beleaguered on the entire planet, 242 00:14:32,100 --> 00:14:33,220 and what do you do? 243 00:14:33,220 --> 00:14:35,860 The one thing that is guaranteed to annoy everyone. 244 00:14:35,860 --> 00:14:38,220 You fiddle about with your pronouns, and now everyone's 245 00:14:38,220 --> 00:14:39,380 pissed off with you. 246 00:14:39,380 --> 00:14:41,540 My GP stopped prescribing oestrogen. 247 00:14:41,540 --> 00:14:44,780 But never mind that, eh? You're pissed off about one little word. 248 00:14:45,980 --> 00:14:49,180 Yeah, I know. OK. I'm getting old. 249 00:14:49,180 --> 00:14:50,780 PHONE RINGS 250 00:14:50,780 --> 00:14:52,980 Hello, sick line. Hiya. 251 00:14:54,220 --> 00:14:57,860 Frederic? You're calling in sick? 252 00:14:57,860 --> 00:14:59,940 I don't feel very well. 253 00:14:59,940 --> 00:15:01,580 The sick line is for employees. 254 00:15:01,580 --> 00:15:06,220 Yes. But according to the employment law of 2024... 255 00:15:06,220 --> 00:15:08,740 Don't you dare. ...despite the '26 amendment... 256 00:15:08,740 --> 00:15:09,900 Fucking Labour government. 257 00:15:09,900 --> 00:15:11,980 ...we've got full workers' rights from day one, 258 00:15:11,980 --> 00:15:13,860 which starts at the point of interview, 259 00:15:13,860 --> 00:15:15,540 and I was just electrocuted. 260 00:15:16,780 --> 00:15:19,260 I should get compensation for that. 261 00:15:19,260 --> 00:15:21,100 You little...! Boss. 262 00:15:23,860 --> 00:15:26,700 OK, Freddie. 263 00:15:26,700 --> 00:15:30,060 I think you should go home and consider your position. 264 00:15:36,740 --> 00:15:40,420 Thank you for the interview. I'll let you know. 265 00:15:42,180 --> 00:15:43,340 He'll let you know. 266 00:15:43,340 --> 00:15:45,660 Legacy of Keir bloody Starmer. 267 00:15:45,660 --> 00:15:48,460 You come to Manchester and run a bar, your lordship. 268 00:15:49,980 --> 00:15:51,940 Yeah? This is Leo, over. 269 00:15:51,940 --> 00:15:54,260 Could you come up here, boss? And bring Zee with you. 270 00:15:54,260 --> 00:15:56,340 We've got a problem. Over. 271 00:15:56,340 --> 00:15:59,380 What have you done now? 272 00:15:59,380 --> 00:16:04,740 3 am, we're locking up, that's when you said goodbye, Zee. 273 00:16:04,740 --> 00:16:06,980 Me and Mikey head out the front. 274 00:16:06,980 --> 00:16:09,500 You slip into that quarter-turn where there's no camera, 275 00:16:09,500 --> 00:16:10,780 and that's where you stay all night. 276 00:16:10,780 --> 00:16:14,180 Oh, Zee, darling. JUDY SIGHS 277 00:16:14,180 --> 00:16:17,620 This morning, 9 am, I open up, I go upstairs, 278 00:16:17,620 --> 00:16:20,780 you pretend to arrive, and you shout upstairs, 279 00:16:20,780 --> 00:16:22,580 say "hello", and I said "hello". 280 00:16:22,580 --> 00:16:25,940 So, you... You slept in that tiny little space? 281 00:16:25,940 --> 00:16:28,940 I thought you were the clever one. What happened? 282 00:16:30,380 --> 00:16:31,700 They said they were going to kill me. 283 00:16:34,380 --> 00:16:38,260 This Polish lad moved in, and he was all right at first. 284 00:16:38,260 --> 00:16:39,860 But then three of his mates moved in, 285 00:16:39,860 --> 00:16:42,900 so it was a house share with the four of them, and one of me. 286 00:16:42,900 --> 00:16:44,300 And we'd laugh, you know. 287 00:16:47,100 --> 00:16:48,900 But then they said we were like brothers. 288 00:16:48,900 --> 00:16:50,220 Oh, they knew. 289 00:16:51,860 --> 00:16:53,500 And then it gets worse. 290 00:16:53,500 --> 00:16:56,380 They get drunk, start banging on my door every night. 291 00:16:57,980 --> 00:16:59,460 "I'm going to fuck you, little boy." 292 00:16:59,460 --> 00:17:00,740 Jesus! 293 00:17:02,180 --> 00:17:05,260 The first lad, Michal, he said, 294 00:17:05,260 --> 00:17:08,700 "I am going to fuck you until you're dead." 295 00:17:13,060 --> 00:17:15,420 From that moment on, they just want to kill me. 296 00:17:15,420 --> 00:17:16,980 They said they were going to cut my throat. 297 00:17:18,900 --> 00:17:20,300 Can't you go to the police? 298 00:17:20,300 --> 00:17:22,780 Yeah, that'll really help. 299 00:17:22,780 --> 00:17:23,820 You can stay with Ashraf. 300 00:17:23,820 --> 00:17:26,780 He's got a room, you can stay there. I'll have a word. 301 00:17:26,780 --> 00:17:29,140 All my stuff's in that house. 302 00:17:29,140 --> 00:17:30,420 Then let's go get it. 303 00:17:31,980 --> 00:17:35,740 OK everybody. Easy, does it. 304 00:17:42,820 --> 00:17:43,860 Are they in? 305 00:17:43,860 --> 00:17:44,900 They'll be asleep. 306 00:17:44,900 --> 00:17:47,500 They get in at four, sleep till four. Just keep quiet. 307 00:17:50,220 --> 00:17:51,260 OK, let's go. 308 00:18:10,340 --> 00:18:12,020 ITEMS CLATTER 309 00:18:12,020 --> 00:18:13,100 Shh, be quiet. Sorry. 310 00:18:19,220 --> 00:18:20,460 Come on. 311 00:18:21,660 --> 00:18:24,460 OK. Hurry, girls, come on, let's go. 312 00:18:27,540 --> 00:18:30,820 This isn't a room. It's a box. 313 00:18:30,820 --> 00:18:33,300 They all live like this, the kids. This is what we did to them. 314 00:18:40,980 --> 00:18:42,060 Hi. 315 00:18:42,060 --> 00:18:43,100 Fuck. 316 00:18:43,100 --> 00:18:46,900 Er, good afternoon, my friend. We're not causing any trouble here. 317 00:18:46,900 --> 00:18:49,420 Just helping out a colleague. 318 00:18:49,420 --> 00:18:51,020 Just a few ticks and we'll be gone. 319 00:18:52,620 --> 00:18:54,540 You know, I've always wanted to visit Poland. 320 00:18:54,540 --> 00:18:55,900 Where would you recommend? 321 00:18:55,900 --> 00:18:57,220 Michal! 322 00:18:57,220 --> 00:18:58,860 Come on, quick! Michal! 323 00:18:58,860 --> 00:19:00,300 All right, come on, hurry. 324 00:19:03,660 --> 00:19:07,540 Who are you? In my house? Who the fuck are you, grandad? 325 00:19:07,540 --> 00:19:09,900 You try it. You fucking try it. 326 00:19:11,500 --> 00:19:12,660 You muppet. 327 00:19:12,660 --> 00:19:13,900 Ah, the lady boy. 328 00:19:14,980 --> 00:19:16,860 Going to fuck you with that big stick, lady boy. 329 00:19:16,860 --> 00:19:18,660 I'm telling you. 330 00:19:22,740 --> 00:19:26,380 I can't stop all of you, but you, Bartek, 331 00:19:26,380 --> 00:19:28,140 I can get you, you little twat. 332 00:19:28,140 --> 00:19:31,940 And they can kill me and rip my head off my body, 333 00:19:31,940 --> 00:19:37,580 but before I die I will batter your tiny little skull into pieces, 334 00:19:37,580 --> 00:19:39,180 you fucking prick. 335 00:19:40,700 --> 00:19:42,420 MEN SHOUT 336 00:19:44,980 --> 00:19:46,140 Jesus Christ, Judy! Run! 337 00:19:48,140 --> 00:19:49,900 Go, go, go, go, go, go, go! 338 00:19:49,900 --> 00:19:51,460 How have you got a gun? 339 00:19:51,460 --> 00:19:55,060 I'm licenced to kill 22 types of bird in my own back garden. 340 00:19:57,900 --> 00:19:59,380 Fuck off! 341 00:20:01,220 --> 00:20:03,180 THEY LAUGH 342 00:20:05,580 --> 00:20:07,780 What the hell, Judy? You can't just stop! 343 00:20:07,780 --> 00:20:08,980 I know what I'm doing. 344 00:20:08,980 --> 00:20:11,580 My uncle was a bodyguard to the Shah of Iran. 345 00:20:11,580 --> 00:20:13,420 Judy! Drive the car! 346 00:20:14,780 --> 00:20:16,180 Fuckers! 347 00:20:17,900 --> 00:20:19,100 Fucking hell! 348 00:20:20,620 --> 00:20:22,780 That's great! Their faces! 349 00:20:35,260 --> 00:20:37,220 ALARM KEYPAD BEEPS 350 00:21:03,540 --> 00:21:05,780 DOORBELL RINGS 351 00:21:10,420 --> 00:21:11,780 Go on, give us your key then. 352 00:21:12,980 --> 00:21:14,220 You said you had a spare key, 353 00:21:14,220 --> 00:21:16,140 you might as well give it to me, mightn't you? 354 00:21:16,140 --> 00:21:17,580 Um, well, 355 00:21:17,580 --> 00:21:20,220 I'm not gonna lock myself out again, Clive. 356 00:21:20,220 --> 00:21:21,300 Well, what if you do? 357 00:21:24,380 --> 00:21:26,060 OK. 358 00:21:26,060 --> 00:21:27,420 There you go. 359 00:21:27,420 --> 00:21:31,700 Er, what's your alarm code? 360 00:21:31,700 --> 00:21:33,540 Yeah, er, OK. 1502. 361 00:21:33,540 --> 00:21:35,500 1502. 362 00:21:35,500 --> 00:21:37,300 Oh, and my coat? 363 00:21:39,380 --> 00:21:40,860 What a day I've had. 364 00:21:42,580 --> 00:21:45,020 Thanks very much for this morning. 365 00:21:45,020 --> 00:21:47,420 It was very kind of you. 366 00:21:47,420 --> 00:21:49,980 So, do I get a key for yours? 367 00:21:49,980 --> 00:21:51,620 You wish. 368 00:22:02,540 --> 00:22:04,340 INDISTINCT CHATTER 369 00:22:04,340 --> 00:22:05,580 MUSIC THUMPS 370 00:22:09,780 --> 00:22:12,300 I mean, like... MUSIC DROWNS OUT CONVERSATION 371 00:22:26,380 --> 00:22:29,340 I'm gonna swap shifts with Donna and go upstairs, is that OK? 372 00:22:29,340 --> 00:22:30,700 OK, sure, anything wrong? 373 00:22:30,700 --> 00:22:31,900 There's a boy over there. 374 00:22:31,900 --> 00:22:34,340 Don't look. Polo shirt. I teach him. 375 00:22:34,340 --> 00:22:35,500 Has he seen you? 376 00:22:35,500 --> 00:22:37,700 Looked straight through me. 377 00:22:37,700 --> 00:22:38,860 You think he's gay? 378 00:22:38,860 --> 00:22:41,220 No chance. He's out to impress the girls, 379 00:22:41,220 --> 00:22:43,660 but if he recognises me, I'm in trouble. 380 00:22:43,660 --> 00:22:45,180 Not just at school. 381 00:22:45,180 --> 00:22:47,020 Never mind that I'm his teacher, 382 00:22:47,020 --> 00:22:48,300 he knows where I live. 383 00:22:48,300 --> 00:22:49,580 On you go. 384 00:22:49,580 --> 00:22:50,820 See you later, boss. 385 00:22:53,660 --> 00:22:56,420 OK, I'm off. 386 00:22:56,420 --> 00:22:58,660 NightNet says that gang of gypsies has moved 387 00:22:58,660 --> 00:23:00,740 to Deansgate instead, so I think we're gonna be safe, 388 00:23:00,740 --> 00:23:03,540 so I will love you and leave you, my peasants. 389 00:23:03,540 --> 00:23:06,540 Um, boss... 390 00:23:06,540 --> 00:23:07,740 Oh. 391 00:23:26,940 --> 00:23:30,060 Happy birthday, Melba. 392 00:23:30,060 --> 00:23:31,780 MUSIC CONTINUES, LAUGHTER 393 00:23:31,780 --> 00:23:34,700 Ladies. Hello, girls. Hiya. 394 00:23:34,700 --> 00:23:37,140 Hey, boys. 395 00:23:37,140 --> 00:23:39,260 No, I'm getting sugared. 396 00:23:39,260 --> 00:23:41,540 There you are! EXCITED CHATTER 397 00:23:41,540 --> 00:23:43,180 You look like you're having a good time. 398 00:23:43,180 --> 00:23:44,980 Great show. Do come in, come on. 399 00:23:50,620 --> 00:23:52,980 MUSIC BUILDS 400 00:23:59,700 --> 00:24:00,940 Ugh. 401 00:24:08,220 --> 00:24:09,620 Let's go. 402 00:24:11,700 --> 00:24:13,780 Oh, so I went to the optician's the other day, 403 00:24:13,780 --> 00:24:16,660 cos you've got to look after your eyes, haven't you? 404 00:24:16,660 --> 00:24:20,740 He says, "Miss Dixie, you've got to stop wanking." 405 00:24:20,740 --> 00:24:23,100 I said, "Why? Will I go blind?" 406 00:24:23,100 --> 00:24:27,700 He says, "No, you're upsetting everybody in the waiting room." 407 00:24:27,700 --> 00:24:30,780 Oh, you've been a lovely audience, you really have. 408 00:24:30,780 --> 00:24:32,220 But before you go, 409 00:24:32,220 --> 00:24:36,180 did you see in the news this week that poor old lady in Levenshulme, 410 00:24:36,180 --> 00:24:38,980 found dead in her flat, no one to care for her. 411 00:24:38,980 --> 00:24:41,340 I mean, what a world we live in, eh, girls? 412 00:24:41,340 --> 00:24:43,500 So, just be kind, darlings, be kind. 413 00:24:43,500 --> 00:24:45,180 Oh, for fuck sake. OK, Melba. 414 00:24:45,180 --> 00:24:46,540 Got something to say, darling? 415 00:24:46,540 --> 00:24:48,300 Don't pretend to care. 416 00:24:48,300 --> 00:24:50,540 You fucking Tory! 417 00:24:50,540 --> 00:24:53,140 I've seen you up in Hale Barns. 418 00:24:53,140 --> 00:24:55,820 You haven't just got two cars, you've got two fucking garages. 419 00:24:55,820 --> 00:24:58,300 Oh, tiny bit of jealousy. 420 00:24:58,300 --> 00:24:59,940 She's greener than Wicked, that one. 421 00:24:59,940 --> 00:25:01,420 Your husband... OK, leave it, leave it. 422 00:25:01,420 --> 00:25:02,700 ...has money... No, no! 423 00:25:02,700 --> 00:25:04,940 ...has money in care homes 424 00:25:04,940 --> 00:25:08,940 that stand women up in the bathroom and hose them down with cold water. 425 00:25:08,940 --> 00:25:12,380 This, ladies and gentleman, is Melba. 426 00:25:12,380 --> 00:25:15,940 Melba... Mediocre. 427 00:25:15,940 --> 00:25:18,340 She's not bitter at all, is she? Oh, shut up. 428 00:25:18,340 --> 00:25:20,620 I mean, I'm not saying she's old and past it, 429 00:25:20,620 --> 00:25:22,660 but she were young when Moses were a lad. 430 00:25:22,660 --> 00:25:25,100 That's not even the right fucking joke. 431 00:25:25,100 --> 00:25:27,980 "She was old when Moses was a lad." 432 00:25:27,980 --> 00:25:29,900 Not young. She was old! Go on, get out. 433 00:25:29,900 --> 00:25:32,300 You're just a bargain basement Bet Lynch. 434 00:25:32,300 --> 00:25:35,660 Come on, Melba. Do you even know what drag is?! 435 00:25:35,660 --> 00:25:38,900 This lipstick, these fucking eyelashes...! 436 00:25:38,900 --> 00:25:40,260 It's a protest! 437 00:25:40,260 --> 00:25:42,300 Come on. No, it's a scream! 438 00:25:42,300 --> 00:25:44,180 Let's get you out. It's a punch in the face. 439 00:25:44,180 --> 00:25:46,020 Shove a pie in it, darling. 440 00:25:46,020 --> 00:25:48,620 It's not Margaret fucking Thatcher! 441 00:25:48,620 --> 00:25:50,060 Get out, you skanky bitch. 442 00:25:50,060 --> 00:25:51,420 You're barred. 443 00:25:54,900 --> 00:25:56,340 That's where I met Harry. 444 00:25:56,340 --> 00:25:59,620 On that corner, right there, in 1992. 445 00:25:59,620 --> 00:26:03,060 I'd only been in Manchester just over a year. 446 00:26:03,060 --> 00:26:04,220 I never met him. 447 00:26:04,220 --> 00:26:07,660 I don't suppose you would've, cos he finished with me in 1994. 448 00:26:07,660 --> 00:26:08,860 HE CHUCKLES 449 00:26:08,860 --> 00:26:11,020 And then he phones me up 450 00:26:11,020 --> 00:26:14,460 one month later, one month to the day, 451 00:26:14,460 --> 00:26:16,460 and says, 452 00:26:16,460 --> 00:26:18,380 "I'm positive, get yourself tested." 453 00:26:18,380 --> 00:26:19,740 Remember those calls? 454 00:26:19,740 --> 00:26:20,980 Ah. 455 00:26:20,980 --> 00:26:22,580 And then... 456 00:26:22,580 --> 00:26:24,140 ...I tested positive. 457 00:26:26,820 --> 00:26:27,980 I thought I was dying. 458 00:26:27,980 --> 00:26:30,780 Well, in 1994, I was dying. 459 00:26:30,780 --> 00:26:32,980 So, I phone him back, 460 00:26:32,980 --> 00:26:34,260 answerphone. 461 00:26:34,260 --> 00:26:36,420 Phone him back again, phone him back again. 462 00:26:40,100 --> 00:26:41,940 He never picked up. Ever. 463 00:26:42,980 --> 00:26:46,300 Then he moved away went back to London, gone. 464 00:26:46,300 --> 00:26:49,140 Six years later, I find out he's dead. 465 00:26:49,140 --> 00:26:50,860 Someone just... 466 00:26:50,860 --> 00:26:52,300 ...mentions it in passing. 467 00:26:54,860 --> 00:26:56,140 Cunt! 468 00:26:56,140 --> 00:26:57,580 Now, we're not meant to blame. 469 00:26:57,580 --> 00:26:59,420 No. He was a cunt. 470 00:27:03,220 --> 00:27:05,980 You should've looked this way, darling. 471 00:27:07,220 --> 00:27:09,980 I loved you since the day I first saw you. 472 00:27:09,980 --> 00:27:12,500 That daft little Scottish lad with eyes like a fox. 473 00:27:16,220 --> 00:27:17,580 I live in hope. 474 00:27:20,180 --> 00:27:21,300 Don't, Melba. 475 00:27:27,420 --> 00:27:31,900 Happy birthday. 476 00:27:31,900 --> 00:27:33,340 I do, though. 477 00:27:37,820 --> 00:27:40,580 Do you ever think it's coming back? 478 00:27:40,580 --> 00:27:43,260 All that shit from the '90s? 479 00:27:43,260 --> 00:27:45,500 We were despised, but you read the stuff online now, 480 00:27:45,500 --> 00:27:46,580 it sounds just the same. 481 00:27:46,580 --> 00:27:48,140 Do I think it's coming back? 482 00:27:48,140 --> 00:27:51,620 Yeah. It's back, you fucking idiot. 483 00:27:51,620 --> 00:27:54,020 Right now, it's here. 484 00:27:54,020 --> 00:27:55,940 It's a storm, it's a tide, 485 00:27:55,940 --> 00:27:57,180 it's a great big tsunami, 486 00:27:57,180 --> 00:27:59,140 and we're in the middle of it right now. 487 00:27:59,140 --> 00:28:01,300 Do I think it's coming back? 488 00:28:01,300 --> 00:28:03,540 You know, if you'd asked me in 1996, 489 00:28:03,540 --> 00:28:05,540 "What do you think 2026 will be like?" 490 00:28:05,540 --> 00:28:07,660 I'd have said, "Glory days. 491 00:28:07,660 --> 00:28:10,140 "We'll have equality, we'll have love and kisses, 492 00:28:10,140 --> 00:28:13,100 "we'll be holding hands, skipping down the streets." 493 00:28:16,220 --> 00:28:17,900 But they tricked us, didn't they? 494 00:28:19,340 --> 00:28:20,940 They just waited. 495 00:28:20,940 --> 00:28:23,460 Oh, they let us all come out, 496 00:28:23,460 --> 00:28:25,460 so now we're standing in the open, 497 00:28:25,460 --> 00:28:27,340 ready for them to shoot us down. 498 00:28:27,340 --> 00:28:28,860 You think that? Really? 499 00:28:28,860 --> 00:28:31,940 Look at me, I'm as out and as proud as anything, but... 500 00:28:31,940 --> 00:28:35,340 ...past couple of years, 501 00:28:35,340 --> 00:28:37,380 I'm a lot more careful. 502 00:28:37,380 --> 00:28:40,540 You just started a great big row. 503 00:28:40,540 --> 00:28:42,380 On Canal Street. 504 00:28:42,380 --> 00:28:43,940 Home turf. 505 00:28:43,940 --> 00:28:45,180 But out there... 506 00:28:46,460 --> 00:28:48,300 ...I used to walk into a room and just go, 507 00:28:48,300 --> 00:28:49,300 "Ta-da." 508 00:28:51,940 --> 00:28:54,900 Now I tiptoe, just in case. 509 00:28:59,820 --> 00:29:02,460 You know the awful thing? 510 00:29:02,460 --> 00:29:06,300 Now I don't have to care as much, not anymore. 511 00:29:07,700 --> 00:29:09,340 Cos I've done my bit. 512 00:29:09,340 --> 00:29:11,660 I have fought the good fight, 513 00:29:11,660 --> 00:29:14,700 very many times, thank you very much. 514 00:29:14,700 --> 00:29:18,340 HIV, Section 28, the Bolton seven, 515 00:29:18,340 --> 00:29:21,740 oh, bless them, in their little leather slings. 516 00:29:21,740 --> 00:29:23,540 I have marched. 517 00:29:25,580 --> 00:29:27,180 Now it's someone else's turn, 518 00:29:27,180 --> 00:29:29,900 one of those bright young things. 519 00:29:29,900 --> 00:29:32,260 They can man the barricades, or woman the barricades, 520 00:29:32,260 --> 00:29:33,820 or them the barricades. 521 00:29:35,380 --> 00:29:37,420 I mean, I'll be 60 next year. 522 00:29:37,420 --> 00:29:39,420 Oh, don't. 60! 523 00:29:40,460 --> 00:29:44,700 In a couple of years, I can retire and remember the golden days. 524 00:29:44,700 --> 00:29:46,940 You're kidding yourself, you know. 525 00:29:46,940 --> 00:29:50,860 If there's a war you're on the front line, my darling. 526 00:29:50,860 --> 00:29:52,980 You have trans bar staff, 527 00:29:52,980 --> 00:29:54,540 that's the battleground right there. 528 00:29:54,540 --> 00:29:56,220 Hey, I love my staff. 529 00:29:56,220 --> 00:29:59,260 And as a result, look at TripAdvisor for your place. 530 00:29:59,260 --> 00:30:02,300 There they are, regular as the morning shit, 531 00:30:02,300 --> 00:30:05,500 post after post calling you a paedo and a groomer, 532 00:30:05,500 --> 00:30:10,260 because they say you pay chemically castrated children to work for you. 533 00:30:10,260 --> 00:30:11,300 They're just bots. 534 00:30:11,300 --> 00:30:12,740 No, that's women. 535 00:30:12,740 --> 00:30:13,980 Women who are furious, 536 00:30:13,980 --> 00:30:16,940 and with good reason, but, no, no, don't start me. 537 00:30:16,940 --> 00:30:20,140 And men, grown men typing away with their big fists. 538 00:30:20,140 --> 00:30:21,580 Yeah, but it's just that, typing. 539 00:30:21,580 --> 00:30:23,660 The president of America 540 00:30:23,660 --> 00:30:29,380 has given these men permission to attack us. 541 00:30:29,380 --> 00:30:30,500 Leo... 542 00:30:31,620 --> 00:30:33,940 ...you're queer in 2026. 543 00:30:33,940 --> 00:30:35,500 You're a political act. 544 00:30:35,500 --> 00:30:37,740 Yeah, but it'll swing back. 545 00:30:37,740 --> 00:30:39,540 We do this, we go through history, 546 00:30:39,540 --> 00:30:42,220 we swing one way, we swing the other. 547 00:30:42,220 --> 00:30:44,540 Conservative then Labour, Republicans then Democrats. 548 00:30:44,540 --> 00:30:45,700 Just... 549 00:30:45,700 --> 00:30:49,140 ...just give it time, it'll... 550 00:30:49,140 --> 00:30:50,860 ...it'll settle. 551 00:30:50,860 --> 00:30:53,340 Is that what history teaches you? 552 00:30:53,340 --> 00:30:54,900 Yeah. 553 00:30:54,900 --> 00:30:57,100 It does. 554 00:30:57,100 --> 00:30:59,780 I think history's merciless. 555 00:30:59,780 --> 00:31:01,980 And it only goes one way. 556 00:31:01,980 --> 00:31:03,820 Onwards. 557 00:31:03,820 --> 00:31:06,980 It marches on, and on, and on, 558 00:31:06,980 --> 00:31:09,900 and what if this never swings back? 559 00:31:09,900 --> 00:31:13,220 What if Trump just keeps on winning forever and ever? 560 00:31:13,220 --> 00:31:16,180 How far will it go? How much will they hate us? 561 00:31:16,180 --> 00:31:17,860 Because they hate us, Leo. 562 00:31:17,860 --> 00:31:20,020 They really hate us. 563 00:31:20,020 --> 00:31:22,060 And do you know what? 564 00:31:22,060 --> 00:31:23,740 I think they've always hated us. 565 00:31:23,740 --> 00:31:27,100 Only now they don't have to pretend anymore. 566 00:31:27,100 --> 00:31:28,740 No. 567 00:31:28,740 --> 00:31:31,860 History tells us one thing. 568 00:31:31,860 --> 00:31:37,500 That blood and fire and retribution always happen. 569 00:31:37,500 --> 00:31:38,940 And right now... 570 00:31:40,580 --> 00:31:42,300 ...it's coming for us. 571 00:31:47,260 --> 00:31:48,660 ALARM TIMER BEEPS 572 00:32:44,300 --> 00:32:45,300 DOOR OPENS 573 00:32:48,940 --> 00:32:51,860 Clive, you are inside my house. 574 00:32:53,100 --> 00:32:54,460 Well, you gave me the key, didn't you? 575 00:32:54,460 --> 00:32:55,980 So, I thought I'd fix it up for you. 576 00:32:55,980 --> 00:32:58,180 You know, that, key safe thing. 577 00:32:59,780 --> 00:33:01,340 If you put this on the wall outside, 578 00:33:01,340 --> 00:33:03,220 you won't get locked out again. 579 00:33:03,220 --> 00:33:06,780 They give these to the elderly and disabled. They love 'em... 580 00:33:06,780 --> 00:33:08,420 Oh, I'm thrilled to be in the same category, 581 00:33:08,420 --> 00:33:11,100 but, Clive, I don't think you should just walk into my house. 582 00:33:11,100 --> 00:33:14,420 I think you should knock or ring the bell. 583 00:33:14,420 --> 00:33:15,540 OK. 584 00:33:22,060 --> 00:33:24,100 DOORBELL RINGS 585 00:33:24,100 --> 00:33:25,900 Better? 586 00:33:25,900 --> 00:33:27,140 Thank you. 587 00:33:27,140 --> 00:33:29,460 All right, I'll get on with it. Where do you want this? 588 00:33:29,460 --> 00:33:31,940 I was thinking, uh... 589 00:33:31,940 --> 00:33:33,900 ...about here? 590 00:33:33,900 --> 00:33:35,460 I don't know, is that good? 591 00:33:35,460 --> 00:33:36,580 It should be, yeah. 592 00:33:36,580 --> 00:33:38,580 Yeah, I'll get on with it. 593 00:33:38,580 --> 00:33:40,780 Do you ever wear any clothes? 594 00:33:40,780 --> 00:33:43,580 Yeah, I should... Yeah, go on, piss off. 595 00:33:43,580 --> 00:33:45,380 I don't need your help. 596 00:33:45,380 --> 00:33:46,980 You leave the hard work to me, eh? 597 00:33:58,140 --> 00:33:59,660 Fucking let himself in. 598 00:34:01,780 --> 00:34:03,380 Fucking let himself in. 599 00:34:03,380 --> 00:34:05,660 Clive bloody Goss. 600 00:34:05,660 --> 00:34:07,020 My fucking house. 601 00:34:07,020 --> 00:34:08,220 DRILL WHIRS 602 00:34:10,980 --> 00:34:12,260 Right, it's done. 603 00:34:13,380 --> 00:34:15,660 Here you are, let me show you. 604 00:34:15,660 --> 00:34:17,300 So, the key's in there, right? 605 00:34:17,300 --> 00:34:21,060 You put in 1502, open it up, there's your key. 606 00:34:21,060 --> 00:34:22,620 You put it back in, 607 00:34:22,620 --> 00:34:24,100 close it, Bob's your uncle. 608 00:34:24,100 --> 00:34:26,740 And that won't attract burglars, cos they know there's a key there? 609 00:34:26,740 --> 00:34:28,700 I mean, they can't force it open? 610 00:34:28,700 --> 00:34:30,420 Does that become a problem? 611 00:34:30,420 --> 00:34:31,620 I'll take it down if you want. 612 00:34:31,620 --> 00:34:32,980 No. 613 00:34:32,980 --> 00:34:34,220 It's up now. 614 00:34:34,220 --> 00:34:36,140 I'll get out your way. 615 00:34:36,140 --> 00:34:38,100 Right, it was £17.99, 616 00:34:38,100 --> 00:34:39,740 All right, but I got you another key. 617 00:34:39,740 --> 00:34:42,980 That was a fiver. So, it's £22.99, 618 00:34:42,980 --> 00:34:45,100 and I'm not charging you for labour, all right? 619 00:34:45,100 --> 00:34:47,300 Cash OK? 620 00:34:47,300 --> 00:34:48,620 If I've got it. 621 00:35:00,420 --> 00:35:01,700 You not working today? 622 00:35:01,700 --> 00:35:03,860 Oh, yeah, no, I am. 623 00:35:03,860 --> 00:35:06,260 Saturday's our busiest night. I'm working 'til 4am. 624 00:35:06,260 --> 00:35:10,700 If you can call that work, eh? Dishing out drinks all day. 625 00:35:10,700 --> 00:35:12,380 Do you know how many people I employ? 626 00:35:12,380 --> 00:35:13,860 No. 45. 627 00:35:13,860 --> 00:35:15,740 Fuck off. I do. 628 00:35:15,740 --> 00:35:17,180 It's a bar. So? 629 00:35:17,180 --> 00:35:19,980 You do not employ 45. 630 00:35:19,980 --> 00:35:22,020 There's 15 girls just rotating at the door, 631 00:35:22,020 --> 00:35:24,620 then there's managers, bar staff, security, cleaners. 632 00:35:24,620 --> 00:35:26,260 How many, are you? 633 00:35:26,260 --> 00:35:27,420 It's just me. 634 00:35:27,420 --> 00:35:28,940 Oh, well, nice life. 635 00:35:28,940 --> 00:35:31,780 And you didn't have to increase the National Insurance for 45 people. 636 00:35:31,780 --> 00:35:33,380 No, but I have to cope with maritime law. 637 00:35:33,380 --> 00:35:36,260 What's that? Ah, you see, you don't know everything. 638 00:35:36,260 --> 00:35:39,260 Under maritime law, you can sail into this country from 639 00:35:39,260 --> 00:35:40,860 Romania without any qualifications, 640 00:35:40,860 --> 00:35:42,540 and you can take my job from under my nose. 641 00:35:42,540 --> 00:35:45,540 Cos you can work as an electrician with no credentials. 642 00:35:45,540 --> 00:35:47,460 How is that maritime law? 643 00:35:47,460 --> 00:35:48,820 Because we're an island. 644 00:35:52,300 --> 00:35:55,620 I did think, if you don't mind, 645 00:35:55,620 --> 00:35:58,580 I was gonna say do you need any work doing? 646 00:35:58,580 --> 00:35:59,740 You know, in the bar? 647 00:35:59,740 --> 00:36:04,380 Cos I'm a bit short of hours and it's not a good time. 648 00:36:04,380 --> 00:36:06,060 And those boys, they cost a fortune. 649 00:36:06,060 --> 00:36:09,060 And Marie, she's always nagging at me, so I'll do a good price. 650 00:36:09,060 --> 00:36:11,140 Er, no. We're fine. Sorry. 651 00:36:11,140 --> 00:36:13,140 No, well, forget I asked. No, I'm really sorry. 652 00:36:13,140 --> 00:36:14,780 No, it's fine. It's fine. 653 00:36:14,780 --> 00:36:16,220 Just if you hear of anything. 654 00:36:18,860 --> 00:36:21,460 How's Curtis? 655 00:36:21,460 --> 00:36:23,860 Oh, I don't know. 656 00:36:23,860 --> 00:36:25,980 Ask him. Fine. 657 00:36:25,980 --> 00:36:29,020 How long's he been gone? 658 00:36:29,020 --> 00:36:30,580 Two years. 659 00:36:30,580 --> 00:36:32,020 Marie said he ran off with a woman. 660 00:36:32,020 --> 00:36:35,500 Began a relationship with someone else, yes. 661 00:36:35,500 --> 00:36:37,780 That must've been a blow. To your manhood. 662 00:36:37,780 --> 00:36:40,380 Well, it turns out I can get a blow to my manhood any time I like. 663 00:36:40,380 --> 00:36:42,540 There you go, you see? You had to make it dirty, didn't you? 664 00:36:42,540 --> 00:36:44,100 Every time. It's always sex with you lot. 665 00:36:44,100 --> 00:36:45,900 I find it revolting, you know, this time of day? 666 00:36:45,900 --> 00:36:49,460 Oh, right, so that's us, is it? That's the gays? We're all sex? 667 00:36:49,460 --> 00:36:51,220 You had a man running out of your house 668 00:36:51,220 --> 00:36:52,740 with my children sitting next door. 669 00:36:52,740 --> 00:36:54,820 OK, so I sleep around? 670 00:36:56,060 --> 00:36:57,780 I'm the one who sleeps around? 671 00:36:58,900 --> 00:37:03,140 In this room, the person who sleeps around is me? 672 00:37:04,980 --> 00:37:07,060 What are you getting at? What do you think? 673 00:37:10,180 --> 00:37:13,340 What do you mean? 674 00:37:13,340 --> 00:37:15,540 Oh, nothing, never mind. Er, 25 quid. 675 00:37:15,540 --> 00:37:17,540 Thanks. 676 00:37:17,540 --> 00:37:19,340 Was it a real woman? 677 00:37:19,340 --> 00:37:23,220 What? With Curtis. Cos these days it might not be. 678 00:37:23,220 --> 00:37:24,340 You know, Marie said, 679 00:37:24,340 --> 00:37:27,460 "If he's gay, has he run off with a man who calls himself a woman, 680 00:37:27,460 --> 00:37:28,820 "or a woman who used to be a man?" 681 00:37:28,820 --> 00:37:30,940 Cos it's all he, she, they, and them now, isn't it? 682 00:37:30,940 --> 00:37:32,180 So, we can't tell. 683 00:37:32,180 --> 00:37:33,580 Well, you know who started all that, don't you? 684 00:37:33,580 --> 00:37:36,180 No. You. 685 00:37:36,180 --> 00:37:37,580 I did that? Yeah, you. 686 00:37:37,580 --> 00:37:39,980 All of you. All this fuss with pronouns. 687 00:37:39,980 --> 00:37:42,020 It was always you lot. 688 00:37:42,020 --> 00:37:44,260 From the moment we are born, in the schoolyard, 689 00:37:44,260 --> 00:37:45,740 it's always you staring at us saying, 690 00:37:45,740 --> 00:37:46,980 "What are you, then? A boy or a girl? 691 00:37:46,980 --> 00:37:49,580 "Are you a boy or a girl? What are you, a boy or a girl?" 692 00:37:49,580 --> 00:37:51,460 Six years old, if you're not playing football, it's like, 693 00:37:51,460 --> 00:37:52,980 "What are you? Some sort of girl?" 694 00:37:52,980 --> 00:37:55,460 All our lives, "What are you? What are you? What are you?" 695 00:37:55,460 --> 00:37:57,540 And then guess what. We say, "OK, fine, you win, 696 00:37:57,540 --> 00:37:59,140 "you're right, we'll do what you want. 697 00:37:59,140 --> 00:38:01,500 "If we are so confusing, then I'll become a she, 698 00:38:01,500 --> 00:38:03,180 "she can be a he, and if that doesn't work, 699 00:38:03,180 --> 00:38:05,580 "I can become a them. What do you think? Happy now?" 700 00:38:05,580 --> 00:38:07,100 Well, guess what? No, it's all, 701 00:38:07,100 --> 00:38:09,620 "How dare you change? How dare you be different? 702 00:38:09,620 --> 00:38:11,180 How dare you not know?" 703 00:38:11,180 --> 00:38:13,340 We did exactly what you wanted, 704 00:38:13,340 --> 00:38:15,900 and you still don't fucking like it. 705 00:38:17,540 --> 00:38:19,100 And I will have my change, please. 706 00:38:19,100 --> 00:38:23,340 I gave you 25 quid, so £22.99, that's £2 and one penny you owe me, 707 00:38:23,340 --> 00:38:24,580 please, Clive, thank you. 708 00:38:24,580 --> 00:38:27,420 Well, I'll go and get it. Yeah, you do that. 709 00:38:53,700 --> 00:38:55,260 Here. £2, one penny. 710 00:38:57,140 --> 00:38:58,660 Look, all right, I didn't... 711 00:38:58,660 --> 00:39:01,100 Oh, no, no, no. It's all my fault, apparently. 712 00:39:02,180 --> 00:39:05,180 I mean, isn't everything? So, you have a nice day. 713 00:39:05,180 --> 00:39:06,940 I do need a spot of work. 714 00:39:09,500 --> 00:39:11,100 There's some dodgy wiring at the bar. 715 00:39:11,100 --> 00:39:12,900 So, yeah, thank you. 716 00:39:12,900 --> 00:39:15,220 I-I'd be very grateful. 717 00:39:15,220 --> 00:39:17,780 Yeah, well, no mates' rates. 718 00:39:17,780 --> 00:39:20,980 Well, we're not mates. 719 00:39:20,980 --> 00:39:22,660 All right, well drop us a text and we'll sort it. 720 00:39:22,660 --> 00:39:25,820 You know, I mean, if I've got time, like. 721 00:39:25,820 --> 00:39:28,020 OK. 722 00:39:28,020 --> 00:39:29,500 Thank you. 723 00:39:35,860 --> 00:39:37,260 MUSIC THUMPS 724 00:39:43,340 --> 00:39:45,260 INDISTINCT CHATTER 725 00:39:56,100 --> 00:39:57,340 MUSIC STOPS 726 00:40:36,660 --> 00:40:38,020 MUFFLED ARGUING 727 00:41:08,940 --> 00:41:13,540 Unholy by Sam Smith ft Kim Petras 728 00:41:34,300 --> 00:41:36,260 EXPLOSION 729 00:41:36,260 --> 00:41:37,540 SCREAMING 730 00:41:51,460 --> 00:41:54,900 River said to Lamb, "'I've always fancied you, sir." 731 00:41:54,900 --> 00:41:58,620 Lamb unzipped his dirty, sweaty trousers. 732 00:41:59,660 --> 00:42:01,580 "Eat this, River." 733 00:42:01,580 --> 00:42:04,740 And River nuzzled deep into the unwashed fold. 734 00:42:04,740 --> 00:42:06,020 MUSIC RESUMES 735 00:43:07,260 --> 00:43:08,940 SCREAMING 736 00:43:16,260 --> 00:43:17,500 Please! 737 00:43:19,380 --> 00:43:20,380 MUSIC RESUMES 738 00:43:35,740 --> 00:43:37,100 GRUNTING 739 00:43:41,580 --> 00:43:42,860 GUNSHOT 740 00:44:02,220 --> 00:44:05,100 Fuck. 741 00:44:08,500 --> 00:44:12,180 I swear it gets madder and madder, that family next door. 742 00:44:12,180 --> 00:44:15,180 George. Get here. 743 00:44:15,180 --> 00:44:16,380 You kept secrets. 744 00:44:16,380 --> 00:44:18,940 If you're hiding things from me now. 745 00:44:18,940 --> 00:44:20,220 So, you won't tell her next time? 746 00:44:20,220 --> 00:44:23,540 Tonight's the night. I am so gonna get rimmed. 747 00:44:23,540 --> 00:44:25,540 Maggie, Maggie, Maggie, out, out, out. 748 00:44:25,540 --> 00:44:27,020 You can look down on women. 749 00:44:27,020 --> 00:44:29,140 Fuck off. Go on, Clive. 750 00:44:30,180 --> 00:44:31,780 Cop a load of this. 751 00:44:31,780 --> 00:44:32,940 I still love you. 752 00:44:32,940 --> 00:44:35,260 I think you lot are so full of all your freedoms, 753 00:44:35,260 --> 00:44:36,780 you don't know when to stop. 754 00:44:36,780 --> 00:44:37,940 THEY CHEER 755 00:44:42,140 --> 00:44:43,860 You all right? 756 00:44:43,860 --> 00:44:46,660 Sit at home with a bad dad, and you're as closeted as ever. 757 00:44:49,860 --> 00:44:51,220 I am so scared. 758 00:44:54,700 --> 00:44:58,380 You terrify me. 759 00:45:00,820 --> 00:45:03,060 Yeah, like it creeps through the walls. 760 00:45:03,060 --> 00:45:04,700 Subtitles by Red Bee Media 761 00:45:06,060 --> 00:45:07,540 Oh, fu... 55319

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