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{\an8}AT ONCE: Hey! So, basically...
THEY LAUGH
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UPBEAT GUITAR MUSIC
OK, so our Ancient History teacher,
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{\an8}Miss Stanthorpe, isn't like
other teachers.
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00:00:08,360 --> 00:00:11,959
She even took us on a school trip
to visit the Brodcombe Bog Man.
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Brodcombe Bog Man is a 3000-year-old
naturally mummified body found
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in a peat bog near our school.
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RECORD NEEDLE SCRATCH
MUSIC STOPS
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He's in a glass box,
he has a ponytail
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and he's all shrivelled up.
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MUFFLED HOWL
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Ms Stanthorpe is the Bog Man expert.
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She's really into him.
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Like, you can tell she doesn't
really have a life
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00:00:28,240 --> 00:00:29,639
outside of school.
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She has... nothing else going on.
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INDIE GUITAR MUSIC
Oh, my God.
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00:00:34,600 --> 00:00:38,119
We literally cried when we found out
that when she was our age,
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nobody wanted to take her
to the prom.
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00:00:41,280 --> 00:00:44,159
So she just stayed at home
and read her book.
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So sad!
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? A grown-up sad woman... ?
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We love you, Miss S!
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{\an8}Please help us make a movie about
our favourite teacher.
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{\an8}All about her going to the prom
with the love of her life...
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{\an8}...the Bog Man.
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That would be such an amazing movie.
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BOTH: Thank you. Bye!
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THEY GIGGLE
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00:01:05,200 --> 00:01:07,559
This is what I like to see,
young people who want
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to make a difference.
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And they're both...
And I'm still talking.
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The last year of high school
can be tough.
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00:01:12,760 --> 00:01:15,959
Tara and Yolanda are probably
dealing with stacks of homework,
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00:01:15,960 --> 00:01:17,279
going to big parties.
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00:01:17,280 --> 00:01:19,079
They're probably baby-sitting
as well.
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Or working at a kiosk.
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Honestly, I could imagine them
making smoothies, seriously.
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And they've gone out of
their way to help
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00:01:25,800 --> 00:01:27,439
this poor Stanthorpian teacher.
40
00:01:27,440 --> 00:01:29,999
You know, Miss Stanthorpe
actually has a PhD
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in Neolithic wetland studies.
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She's technically a doctor.
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Oh. Get her to look
at my groin.
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Shut up! Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!
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Kishmetikaaa!
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As my team brushed off
the history books,
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they couldn't help taking
a stroll down memory lane.
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As soon as the bell rang,
my sisters and I would run
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all the way to the Cortesanos.
50
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The what?
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This gorgeous Art Deco cinema
that my parents did up
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and we all worked there,
and I helped paint the sign,
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{\an8}and it's probably my happiest
memory.
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Can't say I had much in the way
of a childhood, personally.
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That one.
56
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Oh, what, cos you got kidnapped?
57
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Uh-huh.
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I was captured by the militia
when I was a baby
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00:02:40,320 --> 00:02:43,040
and held hostage until
my 19th birthday.
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I was mainly tied up
to a chair and tortured.
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00:02:47,800 --> 00:02:49,559
Oh... Too bad.
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We did get to make a lot of
ransom videos, though.
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00:02:52,360 --> 00:02:54,839
I guess that's sort of how
I got into the biz.
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00:02:54,840 --> 00:02:56,839
Ugh. "The biz"?
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Yeah, I hate it when people
say, "the biz".
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00:02:59,240 --> 00:03:02,199
I'd avoid telling people that
entire story, if I were you.
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00:03:02,200 --> 00:03:04,279
So secret. Keep it a secret.
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You are on very thin ice.
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We arrived at Brodcombe High
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and gave our superstar teacher
the good news.
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She was flabbergasted.
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GIGGLING
BOTH: Thank you. Bye!
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I don't understand.
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I'd never talk about my personal
life in front of students.
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How do they know
I didn't go to the prom?
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I've never told anyone that.
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They must really care about you.
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These are good girls.
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While I congratulated
Miss Stanthorpe's hand,
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Principal Edwards led Winnie and Pat
on a location scout.
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This is the auditorium.
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Echo!
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I love it in here.
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Tell you what, normally I have,
like, 500 people in here, min.
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00:03:50,200 --> 00:03:53,039
I would have loved for you guys
to see one of my assemblies.
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Ssshhh!
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HUSHED VOICE: Yeah. Yeah, I know.
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You're, like, the one for m... Oh.
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00:03:58,680 --> 00:04:01,199
Oh, really?!
90
00:04:01,200 --> 00:04:03,399
Eamon, what are you doing?
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00:04:03,400 --> 00:04:05,759
I should give you guys detention.
Go on, back to class.
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00:04:05,760 --> 00:04:07,479
Off you pop.
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00:04:07,480 --> 00:04:09,039
Honestly!
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00:04:09,040 --> 00:04:11,000
HE SIGHS
95
00:04:12,200 --> 00:04:14,879
That is really shocking, you know?
96
00:04:14,880 --> 00:04:17,759
I thought Eamon Bergers was still
going with Yolanda Jansen.
97
00:04:17,760 --> 00:04:19,919
What's he doing with Tara Simmons?!
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00:04:19,920 --> 00:04:21,479
I'm really behind on the goss.
99
00:04:21,480 --> 00:04:23,439
What the fuck?
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00:04:23,440 --> 00:04:25,399
They've got boys and girls here.
101
00:04:25,400 --> 00:04:28,559
Yeah, well, most places are
mixed now, Winnie.
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You don't say. Wow.
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00:04:30,840 --> 00:04:32,559
I went to a four-boys school.
104
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An all-boys school?
105
00:04:33,760 --> 00:04:37,439
No, no, no. This was an experiment
in extreme discipline.
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Just four boys and 100 teachers.
107
00:04:42,400 --> 00:04:43,879
That's mental.
108
00:04:43,880 --> 00:04:46,479
I think I actually heard about that.
Were you a boarder?
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00:04:46,480 --> 00:04:48,439
Oh, God, no!
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I was just a day boy.
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00:04:50,800 --> 00:04:52,320
Oh, that poor night boy.
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00:04:53,600 --> 00:04:56,839
Right, shall I show you
the cafeteria?
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OK.
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I'm surprised you can't see
what's happened here.
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00:05:00,440 --> 00:05:02,999
I took the class on a trip
to the Brodcombe Exhibition Centre
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to view the remains we've been
discussing all term.
117
00:05:05,360 --> 00:05:07,279
I actually split Yolanda
and Tara up.
118
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They were being highly disruptive.
119
00:05:09,200 --> 00:05:10,639
They might be Aspergian.
120
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They said I wanted to suck off
the Bog Man.
121
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Oh, I doubt that!
122
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Look, they obviously just need
some guidance.
123
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May I be bold?
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Fortune favours the bold.
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No offence, none taken.
These girls need a father figure.
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Hey, everyone,
leftover chocolate mousses...
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Oh, yeah! ..from the dinner lady.
128
00:05:28,440 --> 00:05:30,959
We'll need to be quick.
These can go off at ANY minute.
129
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Look, this whole project
is inappropriate.
130
00:05:33,280 --> 00:05:35,519
We have a set curriculum.
131
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Huh! This says that
the Brodcombe Bog Man
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was found holding a ruin covered
in undeciphered symbols.
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I thought that they represented
the breeding... Mmm!
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JESS AND MISS STANTHORPE TOGETHER:
...and menstrual cycles of
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00:05:44,320 --> 00:05:46,279
the local deer population.
136
00:05:46,280 --> 00:05:47,839
It's a popular theory.
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I'm impressed.
138
00:05:50,200 --> 00:05:52,519
You know, above all else,
this film will be totally
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historically accurate.
140
00:05:53,800 --> 00:05:56,439
Kishmetikaaa!
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00:05:56,440 --> 00:05:58,599
That, of course, means "greetings".
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I've been chosen to be
the film's official linguist.
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And I'll be meticulously recreating
an authentic Bog Man talking style.
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Oh.
145
00:06:08,520 --> 00:06:10,479
Did you see Gorlov's latest paper
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00:06:10,480 --> 00:06:12,960
on the Pheno-euretic
phonetic alphabet?
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I see many things.
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00:06:16,480 --> 00:06:17,959
Oh.
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Brilliant. Can't wait!
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Edwards? Yes, boss!
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00:06:21,440 --> 00:06:23,039
Where are my girlies?
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We need to talk casting ASAP.
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Also, do you have any spare clothes?
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Someone has had an accident.
155
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Clumsy.
156
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They didn't have anything in purple.
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Just to reiterate, Sebastian's
mum and dad bankroll
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00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:41,639
our entire operation out of guilt.
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He's not very easy to be around,
but for the moment
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we are stuck with him.
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I made sure all lessons
were cancelled for the day
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as we held mandatory auditions
for the heart-throb
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at the centre of our teen drama...
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LAUGHTER
...the Bog Man.
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Oh, that is such a cool clip.
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00:06:58,040 --> 00:07:00,040
You've got to send me that clip!
167
00:07:01,320 --> 00:07:04,119
Let's see Rhys Trundle.
168
00:07:04,120 --> 00:07:05,480
Hi, Rhys.
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00:07:08,560 --> 00:07:11,039
You bring me back to life.
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00:07:11,040 --> 00:07:14,559
But me no understand... modern world.
171
00:07:14,560 --> 00:07:17,160
Remember last year when the fire
alarm made him shit himself?
172
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Really? It did not!
173
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Oh, thanks, Rhys.
I think we've seen enough
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THEY CONTINUE LAUGHING
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00:07:27,360 --> 00:07:29,679
You must really miss
your girlfriend?
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I not have girlfriend.
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00:07:31,440 --> 00:07:33,119
Me have wife.
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Bog wife.
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I know his cousin.
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00:07:36,080 --> 00:07:39,279
She told me he has epilepsy.
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00:07:39,280 --> 00:07:41,000
That's disgusting!
182
00:07:43,520 --> 00:07:44,999
Thanks, Tim!
183
00:07:45,000 --> 00:07:47,159
I hear the circus is in town!
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00:07:47,160 --> 00:07:49,319
OK, what is thi...
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00:07:49,320 --> 00:07:50,959
Sorry, what is this?
186
00:07:50,960 --> 00:07:52,760
The Insane Party Starters?
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00:07:53,880 --> 00:07:56,040
TECHNO MUSIC
188
00:08:00,280 --> 00:08:01,800
? Go, go, go, go in hard
189
00:08:08,880 --> 00:08:12,960
? Go, go, go, go, go, go
190
00:08:14,800 --> 00:08:17,359
? Go, go, go, go in hard... ?
Joke audition. Joke audition!
191
00:08:17,360 --> 00:08:19,079
Sebastian, who are these guys?
192
00:08:19,080 --> 00:08:21,199
? Go, go, go, go in ha... ?
JESS TURNS OFF MUSIC
193
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I hesitate to ask how your bog
dialect is coming along.
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LAUGHTER
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They're funny!
196
00:08:31,560 --> 00:08:33,399
Eamon Bergers.
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00:08:33,400 --> 00:08:34,839
Strong name.
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00:08:34,840 --> 00:08:37,239
Eamon! Hi.
199
00:08:37,240 --> 00:08:38,840
Ooh...
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00:08:42,000 --> 00:08:43,399
HE STARTS TO STRUM
201
00:08:43,400 --> 00:08:46,199
? Everyone's rushing,
losing their minds
202
00:08:46,200 --> 00:08:48,999
? I'm just watching,
taking my time
203
00:08:49,000 --> 00:08:51,599
? Newspapers,
skyscrapers
204
00:08:51,600 --> 00:08:54,239
? Blank faces
205
00:08:54,240 --> 00:08:57,719
? Sweet baby princess
206
00:08:57,720 --> 00:09:01,279
? Daughter of the Queen
207
00:09:01,280 --> 00:09:05,839
? I got a pure,
a pure connection... ?
208
00:09:05,840 --> 00:09:08,440
HE WHISTLES
209
00:09:10,160 --> 00:09:11,880
Eamon, what's up?!
210
00:09:14,920 --> 00:09:16,159
APPLAUSE AND CHEERS
211
00:09:16,160 --> 00:09:18,719
Eamon totally got
our juices flowing.
212
00:09:18,720 --> 00:09:21,479
Can you believe his song
was an original?
213
00:09:21,480 --> 00:09:23,359
Time to throw on my captain's hat.
214
00:09:23,360 --> 00:09:24,880
I've found a dreamboat!
215
00:09:26,120 --> 00:09:29,479
You know, I was thinking about
writing your name on my penis.
216
00:09:29,480 --> 00:09:30,959
Don't you dare!
217
00:09:30,960 --> 00:09:32,919
Isn't that, uh...
218
00:09:32,920 --> 00:09:34,199
INDISTINCT CHATTER
219
00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:35,959
And wasn't he with... Yeah.
220
00:09:35,960 --> 00:09:38,239
I didn't know you played it!
That was really great.
221
00:09:38,240 --> 00:09:40,079
You know, early hunters actually
relied on whistling
222
00:09:40,080 --> 00:09:41,839
as a form of communication.
223
00:09:41,840 --> 00:09:42,959
Is that right?
224
00:09:42,960 --> 00:09:44,120
Yeah.
225
00:09:45,560 --> 00:09:47,040
We know your secret.
226
00:09:48,320 --> 00:09:50,400
OMINOUS MUSIC
227
00:09:53,000 --> 00:09:54,399
What did she say to you?
228
00:09:54,400 --> 00:09:57,599
Nothing. She said she...
She says she likes my head.
229
00:09:57,600 --> 00:09:59,799
I feel like I'm back at school.
They're bullies.
230
00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:01,839
Pat, they're the talent.
231
00:10:01,840 --> 00:10:03,039
WHISPERING: Stop.
232
00:10:03,040 --> 00:10:05,439
Well, looks like we found
our bog body,
233
00:10:05,440 --> 00:10:07,360
and what a body!
234
00:10:09,560 --> 00:10:12,879
Yolanda, how would you feel about
playing his throbbing love interest,
235
00:10:12,880 --> 00:10:15,199
the young Gertrude Stanthorpe?
236
00:10:15,200 --> 00:10:17,240
Erm, I was wondering if I could
read for that part.
237
00:10:19,040 --> 00:10:21,119
Excuse me? It's my part.
238
00:10:21,120 --> 00:10:22,399
But you didn't even audition.
239
00:10:22,400 --> 00:10:25,079
Erm, Tara, you're being
kind of dodgy.
240
00:10:25,080 --> 00:10:26,679
Yeah.
TARA SCOFFS
241
00:10:26,680 --> 00:10:28,719
Just you're being a little bit
dodgy. And hold on a second!
242
00:10:28,720 --> 00:10:31,679
Tara, I have something else
for you. I do.
243
00:10:31,680 --> 00:10:33,039
Another part.
244
00:10:33,040 --> 00:10:35,079
Really important,
equal billing.
245
00:10:35,080 --> 00:10:37,039
What?
246
00:10:37,040 --> 00:10:39,439
I'd like you to play...
247
00:10:39,440 --> 00:10:42,679
...Daniella Rachella St Claire.
248
00:10:42,680 --> 00:10:46,079
So Daniella Rachella St Claire
is a stock character that
249
00:10:46,080 --> 00:10:48,639
I always have in my back pocket
whenever someone feels like
250
00:10:48,640 --> 00:10:49,959
they're being left out,
251
00:10:49,960 --> 00:10:53,079
or when I'm accused of not having
enough strong female characters.
252
00:10:53,080 --> 00:10:55,039
We've used her three or four times.
253
00:10:55,040 --> 00:10:56,079
Sam?
254
00:10:56,080 --> 00:10:57,959
Sam, we're gonna have to lose these.
255
00:10:57,960 --> 00:10:59,879
They're friendship necklaces.
256
00:10:59,880 --> 00:11:01,639
Pat, are you sure?
257
00:11:01,640 --> 00:11:04,640
SHE SHOUTS: Sorry, did you not want
usable audio?
258
00:11:05,720 --> 00:11:07,199
Guys, grow up!
259
00:11:07,200 --> 00:11:09,159
That can permanently kill someone.
260
00:11:09,160 --> 00:11:10,919
THE GIGGLE
261
00:11:10,920 --> 00:11:13,879
Hundreds of people die from
blazers every day.
262
00:11:13,880 --> 00:11:15,960
MELANCHOLIC PIANO MUSIC
263
00:11:21,720 --> 00:11:22,959
Gertrude?
264
00:11:22,960 --> 00:11:24,479
Are you OK?
265
00:11:24,480 --> 00:11:26,959
Are you talking to me?
266
00:11:26,960 --> 00:11:29,759
I didn't think you knew I existed.
267
00:11:29,760 --> 00:11:32,679
You live with your inbred family
in that ramshackle hut
268
00:11:32,680 --> 00:11:33,999
next to the bog.
269
00:11:34,000 --> 00:11:36,959
This is gonna sound
hella random,
270
00:11:36,960 --> 00:11:38,999
but I've been having these...
271
00:11:39,000 --> 00:11:40,920
...visions.
272
00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:50,000
Why have you been texting Eamon?
273
00:11:51,000 --> 00:11:52,999
I just said I liked his song.
I was being nice.
274
00:11:53,000 --> 00:11:55,879
You're fucking dead, bitch.
Oh, I'm fucking dead? Yeah, you are!
275
00:11:55,880 --> 00:11:58,719
Oh, really? Dead, bitch, yeah!
Come for my boyfriend again...
276
00:11:58,720 --> 00:12:02,319
THEY SHOUT OVER EACH OTHER
Break it up, break it up!
277
00:12:02,320 --> 00:12:04,359
What's all this about?
278
00:12:04,360 --> 00:12:06,159
She's trying to steal my boyfriend.
279
00:12:06,160 --> 00:12:07,479
Is that true?
280
00:12:07,480 --> 00:12:09,679
He's just a guy!
281
00:12:09,680 --> 00:12:12,999
Listen, it's OK to be boy-crazy,
282
00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:16,799
but I'm begging you,
don't be boy-delusional.
283
00:12:16,800 --> 00:12:19,359
Never talk to me, ever again.
284
00:12:19,360 --> 00:12:21,439
You don't mean that, cupcake!
285
00:12:21,440 --> 00:12:23,400
She doesn't mean that - it's OK...
Oh...
286
00:12:24,520 --> 00:12:27,599
What WAS that?
Was it something I did?
287
00:12:27,600 --> 00:12:29,879
It's a minefield of young love.
288
00:12:29,880 --> 00:12:34,799
This morning, we caught Eamon
and Tara having sex.
289
00:12:34,800 --> 00:12:36,160
They were just kissing.
290
00:12:39,160 --> 00:12:40,999
A steamy love triangle.
291
00:12:41,000 --> 00:12:43,999
Stolen kisses, forbidden glances.
292
00:12:44,000 --> 00:12:47,039
Oh, I hate drama so much!
293
00:12:47,040 --> 00:12:49,519
Would it be worth getting
the school counsellor involved?
294
00:12:49,520 --> 00:12:51,479
I used to go to Shelley
all of the time.
295
00:12:51,480 --> 00:12:53,319
It can be really good
to talk to someone.
296
00:12:53,320 --> 00:12:54,759
Nope.
297
00:12:54,760 --> 00:12:58,239
The only one thing for it,
the bog.
298
00:12:58,240 --> 00:13:01,439
Trust me, it has healing qualities.
299
00:13:01,440 --> 00:13:02,839
Winnie's right.
300
00:13:02,840 --> 00:13:05,519
We will need to stay overnight
upon the bog.
301
00:13:05,520 --> 00:13:07,759
If it can preserve a bloke...
302
00:13:07,760 --> 00:13:10,039
...it can salvage a friendship!
303
00:13:10,040 --> 00:13:12,759
Wah!
304
00:13:12,760 --> 00:13:14,479
Have you ever been to a bog?
305
00:13:14,480 --> 00:13:16,359
T-text in.
306
00:13:16,360 --> 00:13:19,359
As night fell, we gathered around
the campfire to bond
307
00:13:19,360 --> 00:13:20,639
and learn and share,
308
00:13:20,640 --> 00:13:23,159
but I sensed the girls were
still squabbling.
309
00:13:23,160 --> 00:13:26,799
I needed the bog to work
its otherworldly magic, ASAP.
310
00:13:26,800 --> 00:13:29,999
...but he wasn't related
to the skeleton because...
311
00:13:30,000 --> 00:13:32,839
...he was a skeleton.!
YOLANDA SCREAMS
312
00:13:32,840 --> 00:13:34,679
SHE SOBS
313
00:13:34,680 --> 00:13:35,999
OK, it's getting pretty late.
314
00:13:36,000 --> 00:13:37,639
Yeah, should probably hit the sack.
315
00:13:37,640 --> 00:13:38,799
Big day tomorrow, everyone.
316
00:13:38,800 --> 00:13:40,279
Yo, S-dog?
317
00:13:40,280 --> 00:13:42,239
Can we stay up a little longer?
318
00:13:42,240 --> 00:13:44,839
Oh, yeah. No problem.
319
00:13:44,840 --> 00:13:48,999
As long as you promise to have
an unforgettable night.
320
00:13:49,000 --> 00:13:50,680
Yes! Yes!
321
00:13:52,560 --> 00:13:55,039
The next morning I was eager
to start shooting.
322
00:13:55,040 --> 00:13:56,960
We'd fallen a little
behind schedule
323
00:13:59,880 --> 00:14:02,559
waiting for our starlets
to emerge from their slumber.
324
00:14:02,560 --> 00:14:04,599
Good morning, sleepyheads!
325
00:14:04,600 --> 00:14:06,079
Can you not?
326
00:14:06,080 --> 00:14:09,599
Don't bite my head off.
I'm not a gingerbread man.
327
00:14:09,600 --> 00:14:11,759
I've got to show you where
we're filming this first scene.
328
00:14:11,760 --> 00:14:13,079
Come on. You're gonna love it.
329
00:14:13,080 --> 00:14:15,799
While I led Tara and Yolanda
down to set,
330
00:14:15,800 --> 00:14:17,959
Jess applied Eamon's prosthetics.
331
00:14:17,960 --> 00:14:21,279
So would the Bog Man have had,
like, multiple partners?
332
00:14:21,280 --> 00:14:25,359
Mm... Well, this was long before
we adopted sedentary communities.
333
00:14:25,360 --> 00:14:27,359
The dimorphism amongst
mobile tribes would suggest,
334
00:14:27,360 --> 00:14:28,959
like, a chieftain-like role,
335
00:14:28,960 --> 00:14:31,479
who would have appointed dozens
of concubines.
336
00:14:31,480 --> 00:14:33,079
So, yeah.
337
00:14:33,080 --> 00:14:35,279
HE CHUCKLES
What's up?!
338
00:14:35,280 --> 00:14:37,239
I've got a question.
339
00:14:37,240 --> 00:14:39,599
So I know it was a long time ago,
340
00:14:39,600 --> 00:14:42,239
but do you think your parents
have ever forgiven you?
341
00:14:42,240 --> 00:14:45,639
You know, after you destroyed
their cinema.
342
00:14:45,640 --> 00:14:46,879
OMINOUS MUSIC
343
00:14:46,880 --> 00:14:48,399
What was it called again?
344
00:14:48,400 --> 00:14:50,959
The Cortesanos!
345
00:14:50,960 --> 00:14:52,039
Oh, no! Oh!
346
00:14:52,040 --> 00:14:53,999
AFFECTS SPANISH ACCENT:
Oh, you ruined it!
347
00:14:54,000 --> 00:14:56,519
THEY LAUGH
348
00:14:56,520 --> 00:14:59,879
I, um... I think I'm going to go
and get inside of my bag because
349
00:14:59,880 --> 00:15:02,400
I think I maybe dropped it...
DROWNED BY LAUGHTER
350
00:15:05,800 --> 00:15:06,879
Hey!
351
00:15:06,880 --> 00:15:09,159
Oh, you look so cute.
352
00:15:09,160 --> 00:15:11,799
I don't know how many times
I've warned my team not
353
00:15:11,800 --> 00:15:14,559
to let their personal lives
impact the job.
354
00:15:14,560 --> 00:15:17,559
So I was a little disappointed
to see Jess letting her past
355
00:15:17,560 --> 00:15:18,839
come back to haunt her.
356
00:15:18,840 --> 00:15:21,839
Then I went to go make myself
a slush puppy.
357
00:15:21,840 --> 00:15:24,799
And I used to always make myself
a slush puppy.
358
00:15:24,800 --> 00:15:27,319
And then... And then I heard
this noise,
359
00:15:27,320 --> 00:15:29,399
and it was our projectionist, Luis.
360
00:15:29,400 --> 00:15:31,839
And he had sprained his ankle,
when he was climbing
361
00:15:31,840 --> 00:15:33,079
down the ladder.
362
00:15:33,080 --> 00:15:35,799
So then I went up to the side
and I took down the letters and...
363
00:15:35,800 --> 00:15:38,559
...then then I locked the door,
364
00:15:38,560 --> 00:15:42,400
and I-I just forgot about
the machine!
365
00:15:43,800 --> 00:15:50,039
And in the morning, the whole
place was slushed out.
366
00:15:50,040 --> 00:15:54,399
Slush, up to the ceiling, everywhere.
367
00:15:54,400 --> 00:15:55,799
It was everywhere.
368
00:15:55,800 --> 00:15:58,479
And it was so sticky!
369
00:15:58,480 --> 00:16:01,639
People kept saying,
"It's too sticky here."
370
00:16:01,640 --> 00:16:04,119
And it was all my fault!
371
00:16:04,120 --> 00:16:06,879
It is the final straw.
I'm cracking skulls.
372
00:16:06,880 --> 00:16:09,159
Pat, you will stand down.
373
00:16:09,160 --> 00:16:10,919
I'm not giving up on these girls.
374
00:16:10,920 --> 00:16:12,280
Look, they're besties again!
375
00:16:13,600 --> 00:16:15,640
How I have missed those smiles.
376
00:16:18,880 --> 00:16:21,719
And may I ask where the hell
you've been?
377
00:16:21,720 --> 00:16:24,719
Well, um, last night,
Yolanda sent us out
378
00:16:24,720 --> 00:16:26,319
to buy some Booker's.
379
00:16:26,320 --> 00:16:29,039
Guess she found out
about my fake ID.
380
00:16:29,040 --> 00:16:31,479
Your real ID.
381
00:16:31,480 --> 00:16:33,399
You've been out all night?
382
00:16:33,400 --> 00:16:35,479
He told us he likes you.
383
00:16:35,480 --> 00:16:36,639
No, I didn't!
384
00:16:36,640 --> 00:16:38,399
I told you that in confidence!
385
00:16:38,400 --> 00:16:42,199
Anyway, we got kind of lost
last night,
386
00:16:42,200 --> 00:16:44,679
and I think we found another one.
387
00:16:44,680 --> 00:16:46,479
Another?
388
00:16:46,480 --> 00:16:48,600
Bog body. Follow me.
389
00:16:57,920 --> 00:17:00,399
Why is he wearing headphones?
390
00:17:00,400 --> 00:17:03,479
Yeah, no, they didn't have
headphones in Neolithic times.
391
00:17:03,480 --> 00:17:05,919
Sebastian, you drop kick!
392
00:17:05,920 --> 00:17:08,719
This guy's fallen down and
whacked his head on that rock.
393
00:17:08,720 --> 00:17:10,399
This is a freshie.
394
00:17:10,400 --> 00:17:14,719
Nothing to see here, mate.
Move on, move on!
395
00:17:14,720 --> 00:17:17,039
An ancient bog body is a discovery.
396
00:17:17,040 --> 00:17:18,839
This is far too modern.
397
00:17:18,840 --> 00:17:20,119
This is a problem.
398
00:17:20,120 --> 00:17:22,559
This guy is actually dead,
Sebastian.
399
00:17:22,560 --> 00:17:24,520
Oh, I put my hand in his mouth.
400
00:17:26,200 --> 00:17:28,719
So...
401
00:17:28,720 --> 00:17:30,399
HE GRUNTS INDECIPHERABLY
402
00:17:30,400 --> 00:17:32,519
Urgh-shuurghh...
403
00:17:32,520 --> 00:17:33,839
Urgh, guuurghhhh... Guurghh!
404
00:17:33,840 --> 00:17:36,759
Well, at least he's been practising
the bog language.
405
00:17:36,760 --> 00:17:38,279
WHOOSHING
406
00:17:38,280 --> 00:17:39,519
My girlies!
407
00:17:39,520 --> 00:17:42,239
INDISTINCT SHOUTING
They're absolutely bonkers.
408
00:17:42,240 --> 00:17:44,279
Fight, fight, fight!
409
00:17:44,280 --> 00:17:45,719
No!
410
00:17:45,720 --> 00:17:47,639
No, no!
411
00:17:47,640 --> 00:17:49,079
Girls!
412
00:17:49,080 --> 00:17:50,439
This isn't you.
413
00:17:50,440 --> 00:17:52,239
This isn't us.
414
00:17:52,240 --> 00:17:53,799
Take a deep breath.
415
00:17:53,800 --> 00:17:55,039
Have some screen time.
416
00:17:55,040 --> 00:17:56,839
We have to shoot while
we've got this soft light.
417
00:17:56,840 --> 00:17:58,879
Shut up about your stupid movie!
418
00:17:58,880 --> 00:18:00,359
Hey!
419
00:18:00,360 --> 00:18:01,999
I heard that.
420
00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:04,039
We did the whole thing as a joke.
421
00:18:04,040 --> 00:18:06,239
You're a loser.
422
00:18:06,240 --> 00:18:08,280
And we know you got a stiffy
doing the bleep test.
423
00:18:14,320 --> 00:18:16,839
Oh, you foolish girls.
424
00:18:16,840 --> 00:18:20,399
The last thing you want to do is get
on the wrong side of our Pat.
425
00:18:20,400 --> 00:18:22,999
Basically, she explained to
Tara and Yolanda that
426
00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:24,999
if they didn't keep a lid
on the bickering
427
00:18:25,000 --> 00:18:26,439
she'd frame them for murder.
428
00:18:26,440 --> 00:18:28,639
She's got a real knack for
planting evidence
429
00:18:28,640 --> 00:18:31,759
and stitching together audio
to sound like a confession.
430
00:18:31,760 --> 00:18:34,039
She's done it before
and she'll do it again.
431
00:18:34,040 --> 00:18:38,279
With everyone on the same page,
I could finally do what I do best,
432
00:18:38,280 --> 00:18:40,879
weaving a prepubescent love story.
433
00:18:40,880 --> 00:18:42,999
Mm! Full house. Yeah.
434
00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:45,119
So how was camp? Any hook-ups?
435
00:18:45,120 --> 00:18:47,959
I heard Sebastian might have
a little thing for Jess.
436
00:18:47,960 --> 00:18:51,479
OK, everyone, I know it's not
a rainy day,
437
00:18:51,480 --> 00:18:53,999
but who wants to chuck on a movie?!
438
00:18:54,000 --> 00:18:57,359
THEY CHEER
439
00:18:57,360 --> 00:19:00,359
Well, just remember, when it's over
we need to knuckle down
440
00:19:00,360 --> 00:19:01,919
because there is an exam on Monday.
441
00:19:01,920 --> 00:19:04,319
Oh, boo!
CLASS GROANS
442
00:19:04,320 --> 00:19:06,719
Ah, don't worry - you'll ace it
after you see this.
443
00:19:06,720 --> 00:19:09,719
OK, I need two strong boys
to get the TV.
444
00:19:09,720 --> 00:19:12,559
Let's go Vincent and, um...
445
00:19:12,560 --> 00:19:15,400
Eamon, what happened to your face?
446
00:19:16,440 --> 00:19:19,559
I think my skin had a bad reaction
to the prosthetics.
447
00:19:19,560 --> 00:19:20,680
Oh, dear.
448
00:19:23,080 --> 00:19:25,039
I come here whenever I feel low.
449
00:19:25,040 --> 00:19:28,639
Or to sit and pray for
my ovarian cysts to go away
450
00:19:28,640 --> 00:19:30,559
so I don't have to do IVF.
451
00:19:30,560 --> 00:19:32,679
Daniella Rachella St Claire,
452
00:19:32,680 --> 00:19:35,560
are you having one
of your waking visions?
453
00:19:39,200 --> 00:19:42,680
TWANGY UPBEAT GUITAR RIFF
454
00:19:51,160 --> 00:19:52,319
Wow.
455
00:19:52,320 --> 00:19:55,000
He's gorgeous.
456
00:20:00,520 --> 00:20:02,239
HE GRUNTS WEAKLY
457
00:20:02,240 --> 00:20:04,199
Ah, ah!
458
00:20:04,200 --> 00:20:08,079
BOG MAN SIGHS
Oh, he misses Pangaea!
459
00:20:08,080 --> 00:20:10,439
So, Bog Man, how old are you?
460
00:20:10,440 --> 00:20:13,040
HE GASPS
Ah...
461
00:20:16,200 --> 00:20:18,439
TRANSLATION:
462
00:20:18,440 --> 00:20:20,119
That's my prom dress.
463
00:20:20,120 --> 00:20:22,240
Dad says it's too revealing.
464
00:20:24,440 --> 00:20:26,399
You've never heard of prom?
465
00:20:26,400 --> 00:20:27,720
SHE GASPS
466
00:20:29,120 --> 00:20:30,999
Girls, girls, girls.
467
00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:33,079
Now, I've been pretty lenient
already,
468
00:20:33,080 --> 00:20:35,359
and the PTA are right up my arse.
469
00:20:35,360 --> 00:20:38,119
Now, I already let you do
Battle of the Bands.
470
00:20:38,120 --> 00:20:39,559
But prom?
471
00:20:39,560 --> 00:20:41,639
How old is this guy?
472
00:20:41,640 --> 00:20:44,039
BOG MAN GRUNTS
473
00:20:44,040 --> 00:20:45,120
Ah!
474
00:20:48,520 --> 00:20:50,679
Oh, that's a four-colour pen. Ah.
475
00:20:50,680 --> 00:20:55,199
Now, IF - and that's a big if,
mister -
476
00:20:55,200 --> 00:20:57,519
if I let you go to the prom,
477
00:20:57,520 --> 00:21:01,400
the question is, who are you
going to take?
478
00:21:15,360 --> 00:21:17,919
Daniella Rachela...
479
00:21:17,920 --> 00:21:18,920
...St Claire.
480
00:21:25,560 --> 00:21:27,039
Excellent choice.
481
00:21:27,040 --> 00:21:28,720
I'll just put that into the system.
482
00:21:35,840 --> 00:21:39,320
SLOW POP BALLAD
INDISTINCT CHATTER
483
00:21:44,800 --> 00:21:47,119
Do you believe in the concept of...
484
00:21:47,120 --> 00:21:48,760
...soulmates?
485
00:21:54,680 --> 00:21:56,439
MUSIC
486
00:21:56,440 --> 00:21:57,879
There they are!
487
00:21:57,880 --> 00:22:00,519
Hey, Bog Man, I did some research.
488
00:22:00,520 --> 00:22:01,959
Gertrude?
489
00:22:01,960 --> 00:22:05,199
She's 16 and he's 3,000 years old!
490
00:22:05,200 --> 00:22:07,719
It's an inappropriate age gap.
491
00:22:07,720 --> 00:22:10,240
TRANSLATION:
492
00:22:20,880 --> 00:22:22,359
And we're having a baby.
493
00:22:22,360 --> 00:22:25,639
ALL: Awww!
494
00:22:25,640 --> 00:22:29,800
? Summer night feelings,
summer night feelings... ?
495
00:22:39,560 --> 00:22:41,959
You have a unique style.
496
00:22:41,960 --> 00:22:44,439
And you can finally be free.
497
00:22:44,440 --> 00:22:46,479
The exhibition centre have
already been in touch.
498
00:22:46,480 --> 00:22:48,559
They want to play it on
a constant loop.
499
00:22:48,560 --> 00:22:50,199
Miss S...
500
00:22:50,200 --> 00:22:54,439
...we just wanted to say that
you're really intelligent.
501
00:22:54,440 --> 00:22:56,519
You're a really good teacher.
502
00:22:56,520 --> 00:22:58,999
And we made you this.
503
00:22:59,000 --> 00:23:00,720
That's very thoughtful, girls.
504
00:23:02,920 --> 00:23:04,679
Thanks, girls.
505
00:23:04,680 --> 00:23:07,079
Pat, I'm in awe of you.
506
00:23:07,080 --> 00:23:09,000
Didn't I ask you to get me a Coke?
507
00:23:11,160 --> 00:23:14,920
Now, I think Breanna has something
she wants to say.
508
00:23:16,120 --> 00:23:18,559
On behalf of everyone
at Brodcombe High,
509
00:23:18,560 --> 00:23:20,719
we would like to thank you
for coming to our school
510
00:23:20,720 --> 00:23:22,560
and dazzling us with movie magic.
511
00:23:34,480 --> 00:23:38,399
? Everyone's rushing,
losing their minds
512
00:23:38,400 --> 00:23:42,319
{\an8}? I'm just watching, taking my time
513
00:23:42,320 --> 00:23:46,879
{\an8}? Newspapers, skyscrapers
514
00:23:46,880 --> 00:23:51,319
{\an8}? Blank faces, blank faces
515
00:23:51,320 --> 00:23:54,279
{\an8}? Sweet baby princess
516
00:23:54,280 --> 00:23:56,679
{\an8}? Daughter of the Queen
517
00:23:56,680 --> 00:24:00,480
{\an8}? We've got a pure, a pure
connection... ?
518
00:24:01,560 --> 00:24:04,880
{\an8}Subtitles by Red Bee Media
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