Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 00:00:42.20,00:00:45.33 Good for you, Pete. Good for you. 00:01:20.77,00:01:22.03 Access Hollywood spotlight 00:01:22.25,00:01:24.95 on sexy crime fighter Sarah Marshall. 00:01:25.03,00:01:27.64 Hi, everybody, welcome[br]to Access Hollywood. I'm Billy Bush. 00:01:27.77,00:01:30.03 Each week, millions of viewers love to watch 00:01:30.16,00:01:33.30 Ms Marshall's brainy sexpot character,[br]Maddy Stark, 00:01:33.47,00:01:36.43 alongside Billy Baldwin's[br]dark and brooding, 00:01:36.52,00:01:38.69 hard-to-love lead detective, Hunter Rush. 00:01:38.82,00:01:42.86 - And this isn't your jurisdiction.[br]- I just made it my jurisdiction. 00:01:43.30,00:01:45.60 Can you say "catfight"? 00:01:47.26,00:01:49.04 Off-screen, Sarah cosies up 00:01:49.13,00:01:51.82 to her successful composer boyfriend,[br]Peter Bretter. 00:01:51.95,00:01:53.08 He's no household name, 00:01:53.22,00:01:58.52 yet Bretter's dark and ominous score has[br]set the tone for this gruesome juggernaut. 00:01:58.74,00:02:00.09 Take a look. 00:02:03.74,00:02:04.78 What do you think? 00:02:06.22,00:02:10.00 I think it's gonna be hard[br]for her to re-enter the pageant 00:02:10.92,00:02:12.48 without a face. 00:02:17.26,00:02:20.53 Looks like the sky's the limit[br]for this adorable couple. 00:02:20.61,00:02:22.70 Anything could happen. 00:02:25.22,00:02:31.79 We got to do something[br]We got to do something 00:02:31.88,00:02:34.57 Before Mother Earth gets any more hurt 00:02:34.70,00:02:36.57 We got to do something 00:02:36.66,00:02:40.23 We leave you tonight with the newest[br]smash single from Infant Sorrow. 00:02:40.45,00:02:45.01 Lead singer and notorious lothario,[br]Aldous Snow, begs us to change 00:02:45.23,00:02:48.27 in his environmental anthem,[br]We've Got to Do Something. 00:02:48.36,00:02:52.10 I hope, for once, we all hear the message.[br]Good night. 00:02:52.23,00:02:57.62 Mr Prime Minister and Mr President[br]You better see that it's not only me 00:02:57.75,00:03:01.28 No, a mob is rising in size[br]And they've been dying to scream 00:03:04.19,00:03:05.45 Hey, baby. 00:03:07.45,00:03:08.89 Just working. 00:03:10.67,00:03:11.80 Salad. 00:03:12.85,00:03:16.11 Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Totally. 00:03:16.19,00:03:18.72 I didn't realise that[br]you were gonna be back so early. 00:03:18.80,00:03:21.33 Great. I'll see you in a bit. 00:03:22.02,00:03:24.46 Okay, bye. 00:03:25.07,00:03:27.89 It's time to do something 00:03:27.98,00:03:34.03 Someone should do something[br]We got to do something 00:03:34.11,00:03:37.90 And that someone is you and you[br]And you and you 00:03:39.16,00:03:41.85 I pray it ain't all lost and gone 00:03:44.68,00:03:47.81 I pray we might learn right from wrong 00:03:50.60,00:03:56.12 And I pray this broken day[br]will not last too long 00:04:04.99,00:04:09.60 Hey, you got here fast.[br]I got a surprise for you. 00:04:13.25,00:04:15.12 Peter, as you know, 00:04:16.56,00:04:19.47 I love you very much. 00:04:23.86,00:04:25.74 Are you breaking up with me? 00:04:31.78,00:04:35.56 - Pete, are you...[br]- I just need a minute. 00:04:37.43,00:04:38.48 Okay. 00:04:58.18,00:04:59.22 Please don't go. 00:04:59.31,00:05:02.22 Why don't you just put on some clothes,[br]and we can sit down and discuss this. 00:05:02.35,00:05:03.62 No. I can't do anything right now. 00:05:03.70,00:05:05.48 I'm so sorry, Pete. 00:05:06.31,00:05:07.44 I'm in love with you. 00:05:07.57,00:05:09.22 Why don't you just[br]put some clothes on, okay? 00:05:09.31,00:05:11.01 I'm not going to go put clothes on. 00:05:11.23,00:05:14.88 I know what that means,[br]if I put clothes on, it's over. Okay? 00:05:17.44,00:05:18.49 Excuse me. 00:05:25.62,00:05:28.40 Let's talk. Let's talk about him. 00:05:30.62,00:05:31.84 I feel... 00:05:33.84,00:05:35.71 I've been feeling 00:05:36.97,00:05:39.89 for a long time[br]that we've been growing apart. 00:05:41.02,00:05:43.32 We're leading different lives. 00:05:45.50,00:05:47.06 Who's the dude? 00:05:48.45,00:05:49.58 - Who's the dude?[br]- What? 00:05:49.67,00:05:53.85 No, that's not what this is about.[br]There's no one else. 00:05:54.06,00:05:56.24 I know what's happening here. I really do. 00:05:56.37,00:05:59.80 You've been working so much lately, that we[br]haven't got to spend much time together, 00:05:59.89,00:06:01.15 and you're forgetting[br]what it's like to be with me. 00:06:01.24,00:06:03.46 But maybe, if we just held each other[br]or something, 00:06:03.54,00:06:05.02 you would remember[br]what it's like to be with me. 00:06:05.24,00:06:06.81 - No.[br]- Just hold me. 00:06:11.89,00:06:14.20 Please. Here we go. 00:06:21.29,00:06:23.16 There's someone else. 00:06:25.55,00:06:26.90 I'm sorry. 00:06:44.64,00:06:47.77 We don't hang out in places like this,[br]Liz and I. 00:06:48.82,00:06:52.56 Why did you take me here?[br]This place smells like stripper's perfume. 00:06:52.78,00:06:56.12 I'm gonna get herpes[br]just from sitting on this couch. 00:06:56.65,00:06:59.12 - Sure you okay, bro? Yeah?[br]- Yeah. 00:06:59.26,00:07:01.95 Yeah. You don't have to keep asking me.[br]I'm good. 00:07:02.04,00:07:04.43 - You're out![br]- Thank you so much for this opportunity. 00:07:04.65,00:07:05.91 - Auf Wiedersehen![br]- Auf Wiedersehen! 00:07:08.08,00:07:09.87 MAN ON T. V..:[br]Thank you. Thank you all. 00:07:10.08,00:07:11.13 [br]Auf Wiedersehen! 00:07:13.30,00:07:15.00 I feel really good. I feel happy. 00:07:15.17,00:07:18.00 Maybe you should work[br]on the Dracula musical. 00:07:18.13,00:07:21.44 Look, you've been working on it for a while.[br]It'll help your mind. Be creative. 00:07:21.57,00:07:23.44 - Think about you.[br]- I think I need to fuck somebody. 00:07:23.52,00:07:24.70 Whoa, whoa, whoa! 00:07:24.78,00:07:27.78 You're not my stepbrother any more.[br]You're a step-stranger. 00:07:28.00,00:07:29.48 - Why you talking like that?[br]- Brian! 00:07:29.57,00:07:31.57 You don't need to put[br]your P in a V right now. 00:07:31.66,00:07:36.14 No, I don't.[br]I need to B my L on somebody's T's. 00:07:36.27,00:07:38.74 That's disgusting.[br]You don't need to be doing that. 00:07:38.88,00:07:41.35 And if anything,[br]you should leave your P in the V 00:07:41.57,00:07:45.14 and blow it inside the V,[br]so you can have a B-A-B-Y 00:07:45.22,00:07:46.49 and be a normal person. 00:07:46.57,00:07:48.36 I'm leaving, man. I'm out of here. 00:07:48.57,00:07:52.31 She's fucking somebody.[br]Okay, Bri? It's all I can think about, 00:07:52.53,00:07:53.79 is that she's out there, 00:07:53.88,00:07:56.58 and until I do the same thing,[br]I'm gonna feel like I wanna die. 00:07:56.71,00:08:00.66 So just talk to girls with me tonight,[br]all right? 00:08:00.88,00:08:04.71 All right. All right, I'll help you out.[br]I'll talk to girls with you. 00:08:06.19,00:08:08.06 So, Peter, what do you do? 00:08:08.27,00:08:09.62 Musician. 00:08:09.84,00:08:13.49 He's being modest.[br]He works on a show called Crime Scene. 00:08:14.71,00:08:16.49 Oh, my God! 00:08:16.62,00:08:19.41 - It is what it is, you know?[br]- No, I love that show. 00:08:19.54,00:08:22.67 Wait, Crime Scene: Scene of the Crime[br]or Crime Scene: Phoenix? 00:08:22.76,00:08:26.50 - Scene of the Crime.[br]- Oh, my God! I love that show. 00:08:27.76,00:08:30.67 I find you both very sexually attractive. 00:08:32.37,00:08:35.06 Let's pump the brakes. Okay? 00:08:35.15,00:08:37.46 I think that having sex with either of you 00:08:37.54,00:08:40.28 would be a great treat for me. 00:08:40.37,00:08:42.07 You are so funny. 00:08:43.63,00:08:46.02 I just got out of[br]a five-and-a-half-year relationship, 00:08:46.20,00:08:48.94 so I'm not looking for anything serious. 00:08:49.46,00:08:53.33 - Just sexual activity.[br]- Let's wrap it up, buddy. 00:08:53.94,00:08:55.72 You wanna come home? 00:08:57.46,00:08:59.90 I'm sorry, you're cracking me up. 00:09:00.20,00:09:01.77 - Oh, yeah?[br]- Yeah. 00:09:01.85,00:09:03.72 Do you wanna come home? 00:09:04.46,00:09:06.12 Stop it, seriously. 00:09:12.29,00:09:15.42 - That was fun.[br]- Yeah, yeah. 00:09:16.16,00:09:18.95 Overall, I think that went really well. Yeah. 00:09:28.86,00:09:30.43 I want to have sex with you! 00:09:39.39,00:09:42.00 - Are you crying?[br]- What? No. 00:09:43.04,00:09:46.61 I'm sorry that I'm being so weird now. 00:09:46.91,00:09:48.69 No, that's okay. 00:09:49.30,00:09:50.95 You've been weird 00:09:51.91,00:09:57.13 pretty much the whole time,[br]so it's not unusual. Okay. 00:09:57.65,00:10:01.18 Last night, like some sort of idiot, I had sex[br]with this woman who I barely even know. 00:10:03.26,00:10:05.48 I used a condom, but 00:10:06.61,00:10:09.44 I'm really scared that I have an STD, Doc. 00:10:09.83,00:10:12.13 Peter, I'm a paediatrician. Have you noticed[br]you're sitting on a fire truck? 00:10:13.92,00:10:15.79 - Right.[br]- Little kids running? 00:10:15.87,00:10:19.44 - Yeah, this is new. I like it.[br]- I'm kind of backed up... 00:10:19.66,00:10:22.05 Could you take a look at my penis? 00:10:24.44,00:10:25.92 Go ahead. Let me see it. 00:10:26.10,00:10:28.62 - Sorry.[br]- That's all right. Take it out. 00:10:30.27,00:10:31.31 Good. 00:10:31.97,00:10:34.14 - You barely looked at it.[br]- It's a good-looking dick, Peter. 00:10:34.23,00:10:35.92 - Beautiful dick.[br]- Do you think maybe while I'm here, 00:10:36.01,00:10:38.01 - I could get some blood work?[br]- Peter! 00:10:38.40,00:10:39.88 Your girlfriend dumped you, right?[br]Are you hurting? Are you hurt? 00:10:42.19,00:10:46.36 Stop it. Stop crying. Use your dick.[br]Keep fucking. Fuck everything that moves. 00:10:46.67,00:10:47.71 Just wear a condom. 00:10:47.80,00:10:51.36 Listen, I'm backed up,[br]I got a lot of kids. I gotta go, okay? 00:10:51.45,00:10:55.02 You want something?[br]You want a balloon? You want a lolly? 00:11:05.02,00:11:06.37 I just came! 00:11:22.72,00:11:23.76 Hi. 00:11:26.59,00:11:27.63 Hi. 00:11:28.07,00:11:30.33 - Hi.[br]- Hi. 00:11:30.55,00:11:31.68 Hi. 00:11:35.24,00:11:37.64 - Hi.[br]- Hi. 00:11:37.85,00:11:43.59 Okay, do you mind not saying that[br]over and over again? 00:11:44.64,00:11:46.07 You can gag me. 00:11:49.64,00:11:52.77 - You brought a gag?[br]- And handcuffs. 00:11:54.34,00:11:56.12 Do you wanna gag me? 00:11:56.95,00:11:58.38 Kind of, now. 00:12:04.25,00:12:05.99 What've we got today? 00:12:06.43,00:12:08.38 Just a walk and talk at the lab. 00:12:10.69,00:12:13.52 That's what 20 years on Vice will do to you. 00:12:14.86,00:12:16.21 What've we got here? 00:12:16.34,00:12:19.34 The victim's penis was found[br]behind the AC unit. 00:12:19.87,00:12:21.21 Ouch! 00:12:21.65,00:12:23.82 Can you say "dicksicle"? 00:12:26.35,00:12:27.91 Let's do this. 00:12:29.87,00:12:31.43 Okay, I'm ready. 00:12:32.39,00:12:35.52 The victim's penis[br]was found behind the AC unit. 00:12:39.17,00:12:42.18 Just go with the usual stuff, maybe.[br]Something dark and ominous. 00:12:42.31,00:12:44.92 Like losing your penis is a bad thing. 00:12:47.61,00:12:49.92 Oh, you want dark and ominous. 00:12:50.53,00:12:54.27 Come on, I got Allman Brother tickets,[br]I gotta get out of here! 00:12:55.22,00:12:58.14 That's what 20 years on Vice will do to you. 00:12:59.49,00:13:01.35 What've we got here? 00:13:01.49,00:13:03.66 Peter! Peter, Jesus Christ! 00:13:03.79,00:13:06.57 You're fucking Billy Baldwin, aren't you? 00:13:07.10,00:13:09.10 - Aren't you?[br]- Pete, Pete, Pete. 00:13:09.31,00:13:11.27 - Stop staring at me.[br]- Pete! 00:13:13.79,00:13:16.40 You know you're not getting paid[br]for today's session, right? 00:13:16.58,00:13:18.88 - I'm aware of that.[br]- Fucking asshole. 00:13:20.14,00:13:22.23 Peter, it's Brian. 00:13:23.49,00:13:24.62 Go away. 00:13:25.58,00:13:27.97 Listen, your landlord called me. 00:13:28.06,00:13:29.75 Said there's smoke[br]coming out of your place. 00:13:29.84,00:13:32.67 Who, Mr Lopez? 'Cause he's a liar! 00:13:33.36,00:13:34.41 He doesn't... 00:13:34.62,00:13:36.50 We worry about you, Petey. 00:13:36.63,00:13:39.02 Yeah, come on, Peter. Open up the door. 00:13:39.10,00:13:42.37 The fire marshal's gonna come in[br]and bust it down. 00:13:48.50,00:13:50.37 You haven't been[br]out of the house in two weeks. 00:13:50.50,00:13:51.54 Why are you so damn strong? 00:13:51.63,00:13:54.24 I feel so strong! 00:13:54.67,00:13:57.98 Hey, don't walk away from me.[br]You come close. 00:13:59.68,00:14:01.42 Your place is disgusting, Peter. 00:14:01.63,00:14:02.59 Hey, don't walk away from me. 00:14:02.68,00:14:03.72 Whoa, whoa, whoa! Hey! 00:14:05.72,00:14:07.46 What are you burning, man? Come on. 00:14:07.59,00:14:08.63 It's everything. 00:14:08.72,00:14:11.46 It's everything that reminds me of her[br]and I need it gone! 00:14:11.55,00:14:15.72 Okay, I thought I was fine, Brian,[br]and I'm not. I'm not fine at all. 00:14:15.94,00:14:18.72 Okay, let's just put the picture down. 00:14:18.85,00:14:21.77 Put that down. Let's discuss this. 00:14:21.86,00:14:23.94 - I love her, man.[br]- I know. 00:14:24.16,00:14:29.90 Look, Liz and I, we think the world of Sarah. 00:14:30.12,00:14:31.90 We think she's great. 00:14:32.42,00:14:34.38 Okay, but everything... 00:14:34.90,00:14:36.56 I'm just being honest here. 00:14:36.69,00:14:39.90 Every time she would come over[br]to our house, 00:14:41.16,00:14:42.82 she always acted, 00:14:43.99,00:14:47.30 you know, like a little bitch! 00:14:48.47,00:14:50.34 Okay, okay, pump the brakes. 00:14:50.43,00:14:53.69 Dating Sarah is not like dating Liz. Okay? 00:14:53.86,00:14:55.78 Sarah is better than Liz. 00:14:55.87,00:14:58.56 You really wanna have this conversation? 00:14:59.52,00:15:02.21 Do you really[br]wanna have this conversation? 00:15:03.56,00:15:04.61 Yes. 00:15:04.74,00:15:06.61 - She is the mother of my unborn child.[br]- Sorry. 00:15:06.69,00:15:08.09 You're my stepbrother.[br]We're not even blood. 00:15:09.74,00:15:12.22 I have no qualms with sticking you.[br]I will equalize you. 00:15:12.35,00:15:13.91 - Sorry.[br]- You dick! 00:15:14.30,00:15:15.78 I'm just worked up. 00:15:16.61,00:15:19.22 You gotta get your shit together, man. 00:15:19.52,00:15:21.39 I'm trying to. It's so hard here. 00:15:23.09,00:15:24.74 Brian, everywhere I look,[br]I'm reminded of her, okay? 00:15:24.96,00:15:27.66 Like, she got me this, 00:15:28.40,00:15:31.44 okay, because I would always leave[br]my cereal boxes open, 00:15:31.61,00:15:32.87 and the cereal would get stale, 00:15:33.09,00:15:35.79 and so one day I came home,[br]and she had this waiting for me, 00:15:35.92,00:15:40.09 because it keeps my cereal fresh.[br]And now I have the freshest cereal. 00:15:43.53,00:15:45.18 Why don't you,[br]you know what, go on a vacation? 00:15:45.27,00:15:46.97 Go to the Alps. 00:15:47.05,00:15:49.97 - Alps?[br]- Go to Gstaad. It's the best. 00:15:50.10,00:15:51.36 I could go to Hawaii. 00:15:51.45,00:15:54.27 Sarah was always talking about this place[br]in Hawaii that was supposed to be nice. 00:15:54.36,00:15:56.01 No, don't. I wouldn't go there. 00:15:56.14,00:15:59.80 What, I can't go to Hawaii now, because[br]Sarah Marshall has heard of Hawaii? 00:15:59.88,00:16:02.19 Then go to Hawaii. Go to Hawaii. 00:16:02.80,00:16:03.84 Do it. 00:16:09.67,00:16:11.67 No, no, no, don't destroy the computer. 00:16:11.76,00:16:13.02 I'm just deleting these pictures. 00:16:13.15,00:16:15.63 Okay, I need them off my computer. 00:16:17.19,00:16:20.41 You know what? You're not even doing[br]a proper permanent delete. 00:16:20.54,00:16:21.80 Well... 00:16:21.89,00:16:24.72 If we end up getting back together,[br]I wanna have a few of them left. 00:16:24.80,00:16:25.85 You're crazy. 00:16:27.72,00:16:28.98 - No, no, please don't delete them.[br]- They have to go. Done, done. 00:16:43.37,00:16:45.85 That was hilarious. Aloha! 00:16:46.07,00:16:49.11 I'm Sarah Marshall from Crime Scene:[br]Scene of the crime. 00:16:49.20,00:16:51.81 And when I'm not scrubbing for evidence,[br]I'm flying Hawaiian Airlines... 00:16:52.03,00:16:52.94 Excuse me! Hi. 00:16:53.07,00:16:54.42 ... to my favourite destinations. Mahalo. 00:16:54.51,00:16:56.20 Hi, can I have another bloody mary, please? 00:16:57.77,00:16:59.86 You're still working on that one. 00:16:59.94,00:17:02.47 It's just an anticipatory order. 00:17:02.55,00:17:04.55 Okay, I'll be right back! 00:17:16.43,00:17:18.51 What do you think caused[br]such excessive bleeding? 00:17:18.73,00:17:22.77 He was either stabbed in the aorta[br]or it was his time of the month. 00:17:34.56,00:17:35.74 Aloha! 00:17:36.87,00:17:38.74 Check in this way. 00:17:49.56,00:17:52.17 - Just married?[br]- Yes, how did you guess? 00:17:52.39,00:17:56.04 Oh, you've got that magic newlywed dust[br]all over you. 00:17:57.00,00:17:59.70 - Oh, my wife.[br]- Oh, my husband. 00:17:59.78,00:18:01.48 - Oh, my wife.[br]- My husband. 00:18:01.57,00:18:03.57 My old ball and chain. 00:18:07.83,00:18:10.22 You quit squirming and come here. 00:18:11.05,00:18:13.14 What is into you? 00:18:13.88,00:18:15.44 Not me, yet. 00:18:15.53,00:18:19.62 Here is your room key.[br]So you're all set. Room 222. 00:18:19.70,00:18:21.79 Room key's inside,[br]and the elevators are to the right. 00:18:22.01,00:18:23.05 Mahalo. 00:18:23.14,00:18:24.70 Congratulations. 00:18:27.44,00:18:29.40 Here you go, sir. Have some POG juice. 00:18:29.53,00:18:31.49 Welcome to Turtle Bay.[br]What can I do for you? 00:18:31.62,00:18:33.79 I'm checking in.[br]My name's Bretter, Peter Bretter, 00:18:33.88,00:18:34.93 but actually, I don't have a reservation. 00:18:36.71,00:18:39.23 I just thought I'd take my chances. 00:18:40.58,00:18:41.71 Bold! 00:18:42.45,00:18:46.41 We are all booked up,[br]but we do have the Kapua suite available. 00:18:46.62,00:18:49.32 - Okay. How much is that?[br]- $6,000 a night. 00:18:50.28,00:18:52.45 - Wow.[br]- Beautiful views. 00:18:52.58,00:18:54.54 I can imagine.[br]That's a little bit out of my price range. 00:18:54.63,00:18:56.41 Sorry. 00:18:56.54,00:18:58.93 That's a shame. This is a beautiful 00:19:00.80,00:19:01.93 hotel. 00:19:02.89,00:19:05.80 Oh, yeah, it's Sarah Marshall[br]from Crime Scene. 00:19:06.41,00:19:08.20 People are excited that she's here. 00:19:09.89,00:19:13.11 She's my ex-girlfriend.[br]We broke up three weeks ago. 00:19:13.20,00:19:15.41 - I'm sorry, sir.[br]- Right. This is fine, right? 00:19:15.50,00:19:18.42 - Sir?[br]- It's totally fine. Okay, there she is. 00:19:20.81,00:19:23.72 - Did she see me? Is she coming over here?[br]- Uh-huh. Yup. 00:19:23.85,00:19:25.50 I wish I wasn't wearing this fucking shirt. 00:19:25.63,00:19:28.64 Fair enough.[br]Why don't you try to unbutton it? 00:19:30.29,00:19:31.85 Button it back up. 00:19:33.25,00:19:34.81 - Peter![br]- Hey. 00:19:35.51,00:19:37.59 - Hi.[br]- What are you doing here? 00:19:38.12,00:19:40.12 Came here to murder you. 00:19:40.73,00:19:43.03 Really, what are you doing here? 00:19:43.86,00:19:47.08 I have been having a tough time,[br]you know, back in LA. 00:19:47.60,00:19:50.21 But then I came here, and here you are. 00:19:50.73,00:19:53.03 I just think that's too crazy to be... 00:19:53.16,00:19:55.64 Hello there, you little sex object. 00:19:55.73,00:19:58.47 I've lost a shoe.[br]Have you seen it anywhere? 00:19:58.56,00:20:02.64 It's like this one, but, you know,[br]obviously it's the opposite one. 00:20:04.08,00:20:09.30 Excuse me, missus, I've lost a shoe.[br]Like this one. It's like this one's fellow. 00:20:09.43,00:20:12.52 - Sort of the exact opposite, in fact, of that.[br]Uh-huh. 00:20:12.65,00:20:15.04 Not an evil version, but just, you know, 00:20:15.13,00:20:19.30 a shoe like this, but for the other foot.[br]Otherwise, I'd have two right... 00:20:19.43,00:20:20.87 Aldous, this is Peter. 00:20:21.00,00:20:24.83 Hey, all right, Peter.[br]Nice to meet you, mate. Aldous. 00:20:26.09,00:20:28.30 - Good to meet you, man.[br]- My ex-boyfriend. 00:20:28.39,00:20:30.48 Right. Hey, I'm Aldous Snow. 00:20:30.70,00:20:32.96 I know who you are.[br]Yeah, you're very, very famous. 00:20:33.18,00:20:35.04 Yeah, I am. I am for my sins. 00:20:35.26,00:20:37.65 So are you staying here, as well? 00:20:37.79,00:20:39.13 - I'm not, as a matter of fact...[br]- I'm sorry. 00:20:39.22,00:20:41.74 Excuse me, Mr Bretter, Ms Marshall, 00:20:41.83,00:20:46.00 but we were able to book the[br]Kapua suite for you, sir, for four nights. 00:20:48.83,00:20:50.48 - You were?[br]- Yes, sir. 00:20:52.79,00:20:54.79 - Marvellous.[br]- Perfect. Perfect amount of time. 00:20:54.88,00:20:57.36 Listen, if you wanna have dinner with us[br]one of those nights... 00:20:57.49,00:20:58.83 - Aldous.[br]... feel very... 00:20:58.92,00:20:59.96 No. 00:21:00.10,00:21:02.27 That's very gentlemanly of you,[br]but you two enjoy your trip. 00:21:02.49,00:21:04.49 I'll be just fine on my own. 00:21:04.66,00:21:07.18 - All right, Peter.[br]- The Kapua suite... 00:21:07.58,00:21:11.06 - Have a good trip, Pete.[br]- I like your shirt. It's colourful. 00:21:11.14,00:21:12.62 - Bye.[br]- Bye now. 00:21:13.01,00:21:15.40 Ta-ta. I was wearing two shoes[br]this morning, right? 00:21:20.93,00:21:23.32 Thank you. Thank you for bailing me out.[br]I still can't afford that room. 00:21:25.41,00:21:27.71 Nobody can.[br]It's for, like, Oprah or, like, C�line Dion. 00:21:27.84,00:21:29.06 Really, it's not a big deal. 00:21:29.19,00:21:31.67 So you can stay in the suite,[br]but since you're not technically a guest, 00:21:31.89,00:21:33.97 you have to clean up after yourself. 00:21:34.19,00:21:36.67 Otherwise, here is your room key 00:21:37.71,00:21:39.50 and enjoy your stay. 00:21:40.63,00:21:42.85 Why are you doing this for me? 00:21:44.72,00:21:47.85 She's here with some guy already?[br]Kind of messed up. 00:21:48.37,00:21:49.72 - Right?[br]- Yeah. 00:21:51.20,00:21:52.94 - Thank you.[br]- Really, it's not a big deal. 00:21:53.07,00:21:54.41 Go enjoy yourself. 00:21:54.50,00:21:57.33 Rachel Jansen.[br]A thousand times, thank you, 00:21:57.55,00:21:59.72 - you know what I mean...[br]- Go enjoy yourself. 00:21:59.94,00:22:02.33 - This is a disaster![br]Calm down, man. 00:22:03.16,00:22:04.42 Are there other hotels on the island? 00:22:04.55,00:22:05.90 Of course there are other hotels, 00:22:05.98,00:22:07.98 but I'm not leaving here,[br]it'll look like I'm running away. 00:22:08.07,00:22:11.42 Wait. Why are you whispering?[br]You're not following them, are you? 00:22:11.51,00:22:12.68 I had a girlfriend, right? 00:22:12.77,00:22:16.81 And Liam and Noel Gallagher[br]both had it off with her right in front of me, 00:22:16.94,00:22:18.29 so that's similar. 00:22:18.38,00:22:19.86 And that was a bit awkward, actually. 00:22:20.07,00:22:22.99 So if you do wanna change hotels,[br]I quite understand. 00:22:23.07,00:22:25.60 No, no, I'm not changing hotels. 00:22:25.68,00:22:27.90 Stop following[br]and just go back to your room, Peter. 00:22:27.99,00:22:30.08 - They're gone![br]- Why are you looking for them? 00:22:30.16,00:22:32.03 - I don't know.[br]- You're acting like an idiot. 00:22:32.16,00:22:34.03 Run! Get out of there! Go to your room! 00:22:34.25,00:22:36.21 - What do you think they're doing?[br]- Peter, go. 00:22:36.34,00:22:38.21 Oh, God! Okay, there they are. 00:22:38.43,00:22:40.08 - There they are, I see them.[br]- Go back to your room, Peter. 00:22:40.17,00:22:41.73 Peter, go back to your room.[br]Go back to your room, Peter. 00:22:41.86,00:22:42.91 I'm going in. 00:22:42.99,00:22:44.69 Go back to your room, Peter.[br]Are you listening to me? 00:22:44.86,00:22:46.95 Peter, go back to your room.[br]Peter, Peter, Peter... 00:22:47.30,00:22:48.34 Hey! 00:22:49.69,00:22:51.56 Hey, nice room. 00:22:51.78,00:22:53.21 Go! 00:22:53.87,00:22:55.82 I am in the Kapua suite. 00:22:55.95,00:22:58.87 What are you doing? Sucker! 00:22:58.95,00:23:00.09 Have fun. 00:23:01.65,00:23:03.65 Listen, you piece of shit! 00:23:04.26,00:23:08.44 You're an idiot. Back to your room, Peter.[br]Peter, back to your room. 00:23:10.52,00:23:11.78 Did you enjoy that? 00:23:12.00,00:23:14.48 - Did you like what you saw?[br]- That hurt a lot. 00:23:14.61,00:23:17.61 But I know Sarah,[br]and I'm pretty sure I just ruined her day. 00:23:33.36,00:23:35.22 You know[br]how we thought the killer masturbated 00:23:35.36,00:23:37.53 before he committed each homicide? 00:23:37.66,00:23:39.31 That's the theory. 00:23:39.53,00:23:41.62 Take a look at the microscope. 00:23:44.01,00:23:46.84 Oh, yeah, looks like where he's going, 00:23:48.05,00:23:50.66 he'll need to know how to masturbate. 00:24:02.97,00:24:04.02 Oh, God! 00:24:08.71,00:24:10.58 - Hello.[br]Hey, Peter? 00:24:11.84,00:24:13.93 - Sarah?[br]- No. 00:24:14.02,00:24:17.28 It's Rachel Jansen, from the front desk. 00:24:19.45,00:24:22.28 - Hey![br]- Hey, what's going on up there? 00:24:22.37,00:24:25.59 I'm getting complaints[br]about a woman crying hysterically. 00:24:25.72,00:24:28.63 Yeah, you know what, I hear her, too, 00:24:28.72,00:24:31.98 and it sounds like[br]she's having such a hard time. 00:24:32.07,00:24:34.76 I think it's coming from the floor above me. 00:24:34.98,00:24:36.85 You're on the top floor. 00:24:38.85,00:24:40.85 I'll try to keep it down. 00:24:41.46,00:24:43.85 - Are you okay?[br]- Yeah, you have a nice night. 00:24:43.94,00:24:45.11 Okay. 00:24:59.81,00:25:03.99 I would love to sell you some weed, Jeremy,[br]but I'm at my fucking job right now. 00:25:04.21,00:25:08.34 Obviously, because you called me at work,[br]you know that I'm at my place of work. 00:25:08.47,00:25:10.43 So I can't just leave here[br]and sell you some weed. 00:25:10.56,00:25:12.86 I can sell you some weed when I'm done. 00:25:12.95,00:25:16.51 Hold on, I gotta call you back.[br]Mahalo, all right. 00:25:16.69,00:25:18.91 - Hey, how's it going?[br]- Hey. 00:25:18.99,00:25:20.65 I'd just like to grab some dinner, please. 00:25:20.86,00:25:23.78 - Okay, great. Is your wife gonna meet you?[br]- No. 00:25:24.73,00:25:26.30 Your girlfriend? 00:25:27.56,00:25:29.82 No, I don't have a girlfriend. 00:25:31.74,00:25:34.43 - You're just by yourself?[br]- Yeah. 00:25:34.95,00:25:36.22 Sucks. 00:25:36.30,00:25:39.74 Okay, so just one. Here's your wine list[br]and your menu. Come on. 00:25:39.87,00:25:41.30 Do you want, like, a magazine[br]or something? 00:25:41.43,00:25:43.61 It's gonna be boring[br]if you're just sitting by yourself. 00:25:43.70,00:25:44.87 I'll be all right. Thank you. 00:25:44.96,00:25:47.26 I just would be so depressed. 00:25:47.35,00:25:48.70 - Yeah.[br]- Here you go. 00:25:48.83,00:25:49.87 Thank you. 00:25:50.78,00:25:54.35 The best thing is,[br]you have the greatest table in the house. 00:25:54.44,00:25:56.66 - Oh, yeah?[br]- That's Aldous Snow right there. 00:25:56.74,00:25:58.83 I know. I know, dude. I know. 00:25:59.13,00:26:01.14 - I'm gonna ask him. I'll ask him politely.[br]- No, please don't, please. 00:26:02.35,00:26:03.40 Mate! 00:26:04.66,00:26:06.96 Why don't you come over and sit with us?[br]You'll be very welcome. 00:26:07.05,00:26:10.31 No, thank you. I need a drink. 00:26:11.44,00:26:13.62 Would you guys like a drink? 00:26:13.75,00:26:16.05 Well, no, actually, because... 00:26:16.36,00:26:19.88 Seven years clean.[br]That's what this tattoo denotes. 00:26:20.01,00:26:22.40 Seven years free from drugs and alcohol. 00:26:22.49,00:26:24.71 If I have just one sip of wine, 00:26:24.79,00:26:28.66 by the end of the evening,[br]I'll be, like, rimming waiters for their tips 00:26:28.84,00:26:30.01 just to get me hands on a rock. 00:26:30.10,00:26:32.19 You know what I mean? Nasty. 00:26:33.36,00:26:36.06 I heard that.[br]- Hey, what's up, man? 00:26:36.45,00:26:38.23 How are you enjoying[br]your vegetable medley? 00:26:38.36,00:26:39.80 It's mundane. 00:26:40.45,00:26:42.84 It is mundane. It's great, I know. 00:26:43.06,00:26:44.58 Will you marry me? 00:26:45.02,00:26:47.02 Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Yes! 00:26:47.10,00:26:48.67 - She said yes![br]- Beautiful. 00:26:49.50,00:26:50.84 Congratulations! 00:26:53.97,00:26:57.02 I'm so excited! Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 00:26:57.93,00:26:59.11 Peter! 00:27:01.80,00:27:03.06 What's up? 00:27:03.80,00:27:05.76 - Are you doing okay?[br]- Yeah. 00:27:05.98,00:27:07.54 Yeah, I'm good. 00:27:08.68,00:27:12.55 Look, did you follow me here?[br]Did my assistant tell you I was coming? 00:27:12.63,00:27:14.02 - No.[br]- Did you talk to her? 00:27:14.11,00:27:18.29 No, I didn't talk to your assistant.[br]It's not all about you, you know. 00:27:18.50,00:27:23.07 Hawaii is a beautiful place.[br]People come here, usually not to follow you. 00:27:23.50,00:27:26.20 So you're really staying?[br]You're gonna stay? 00:27:26.33,00:27:30.07 Yeah, I think so. I really like it here.[br]I feel at home here. 00:27:30.38,00:27:31.85 I just love it. 00:27:33.07,00:27:34.64 Yeah, you should stay. 00:27:34.77,00:27:37.03 I appreciate your consideration. 00:27:37.38,00:27:39.99 Sounds like Aldous probably[br]shared a lot of needles, 00:27:40.07,00:27:42.47 so thank you for dating him after me. 00:27:42.68,00:27:44.25 - I appreciate that.[br]- Hmm. 00:27:45.60,00:27:49.56 - Hope you have a really good time here.[br]- Have a great dinner. 00:27:49.69,00:27:50.90 Thank you. 00:27:52.17,00:27:53.64 Groupie whore. 00:27:54.17,00:27:55.60 Psycho stalker. 00:27:56.25,00:28:00.82 You know what? It's vacation.[br]I think I'll just take a pi�a colada, please. 00:28:08.87,00:28:10.52 Look at this guy. 00:28:10.74,00:28:13.34 Look at this guy. 00:28:15.22,00:28:18.13 Not us, buddy. Right? Not us. 00:28:18.35,00:28:22.09 I'm on Sex and the City.[br]What's up, Miranda? 00:28:23.13,00:28:27.22 I'm Samantha. I have sex with everyone. 00:28:27.30,00:28:29.31 Maybe it's a good thing that they're here. 00:28:29.39,00:28:32.31 You know what I mean?[br]Maybe this is a challenge from God 00:28:32.44,00:28:34.39 for me to forget her. You know? 00:28:34.61,00:28:38.79 Or maybe it's a sign from God[br]that you should be with her. 00:28:39.70,00:28:41.40 I love her show. 00:28:41.92,00:28:45.22 When they mix the sexuality[br]and the violence, I like it. 00:28:45.35,00:28:47.66 What the hell is wrong with you two?[br]You gotta move on. 00:28:47.75,00:28:49.92 I hear you say that, but it's not that easy. 00:28:50.05,00:28:52.22 It's that easy. Promise you it is. 00:28:52.36,00:28:54.01 I lived in South Central. 00:28:54.23,00:28:56.92 South Central. And I hated it. 00:28:57.01,00:28:58.27 That's why I moved to Oahu. 00:28:58.40,00:29:00.66 Now I can name you[br]over 200 different kinds of fish. 00:29:00.79,00:29:02.36 - No, you can't.[br]- Oh, yes, I can. 00:29:02.53,00:29:03.92 - Do it.[br]- Yeah, you cannot. 00:29:04.01,00:29:09.01 G. Ghost pipefish, grill fish, goaler fish[br]grouper fish, greenback... 00:29:09.23,00:29:10.88 What's the state fish of Hawaii? 00:29:11.01,00:29:12.58 Humuhumunukunukuapua'a. 00:29:12.75,00:29:14.45 - Yeah, bitch.[br]- Hey. 00:29:15.19,00:29:17.80 - You ready?[br]- Yeah, just gonna close up. 00:29:20.71,00:29:24.54 Hello, Mr Bretter, Mr Brayden.[br]Where's your wife, sir? 00:29:25.06,00:29:27.37 She is in bed. 00:29:27.50,00:29:29.45 How are things going with the lady? 00:29:29.54,00:29:33.71 Not awesome.[br]She's complicated, like The Da Vinci Code, 00:29:34.58,00:29:37.37 you know, but harder to crack. 00:29:38.72,00:29:42.59 But life is full of lessons.[br]You learn something new every day. 00:29:44.28,00:29:46.98 Wonder what I'm going to learn tomorrow. 00:29:48.41,00:29:49.59 Well. 00:29:50.20,00:29:51.55 - Good night, sir.[br]- Good night. 00:29:51.76,00:29:52.81 Good night, sir. 00:29:52.94,00:29:55.63 Off to find the mythical clitoris. 00:29:56.90,00:30:02.20 So, Peter, were you able to get[br]that crying lady out of your room? 00:30:03.46,00:30:04.90 'Cause I could send someone up,[br]if you want. 00:30:05.03,00:30:06.77 - Oh, you could?[br]- Yeah. 00:30:07.64,00:30:10.33 That's very funny. It is. 00:30:11.46,00:30:15.64 Well, listen, Sarah Marshall Show sucks.[br]Who cares? 00:30:15.77,00:30:18.38 I do the music for that programme. 00:30:19.60,00:30:22.12 Did I mention that the music rocks? 00:30:23.68,00:30:27.34 That's very sweet of you.[br]That's very sweet of you to say. 00:30:27.43,00:30:29.51 You don't have to say that, though.[br]It's not music. 00:30:29.60,00:30:32.21 There's no melody, it's just tones. 00:30:32.34,00:30:34.43 Just dark, ominous tones. 00:30:36.21,00:30:39.30 "The masturbating dog killer[br]is on the loose again. 00:30:39.43,00:30:42.12 "He'll kill the owner,[br]but at least the dogs are happy. " 00:30:49.13,00:30:51.74 I'm no Aldous Snow, I guess, you know. 00:30:56.61,00:30:59.35 [br]Time to start the music 00:30:59.74,00:31:01.65 All gonna light the light 00:31:02.26,00:31:06.22 Yeah, yeah, gonna get things started[br]on The Muppet Show tonight 00:31:13.92,00:31:16.53 - Whipped cream or berry?[br]- Whipped cream. 00:31:18.31,00:31:21.53 Here we are, sir. Have a wonderful breakfast. 00:31:21.96,00:31:24.35 What a lovely table, so close to the buffet. 00:31:24.48,00:31:26.88 I'm glad you like it. Mahalo. 00:31:30.83,00:31:32.62 Good morning, sir.[br]Can I start you with anything? 00:31:32.70,00:31:33.97 Orange juice, coffee? 00:31:34.05,00:31:37.49 What about, like, some pineapple juice[br]with a little bit of rum on the side. 00:31:37.62,00:31:41.45 Of course. I like your style. Cocktail guy. 00:31:41.66,00:31:43.53 - Thank you.[br]- You are welcome. 00:31:43.75,00:31:45.62 We've already reserved[br]the sea kayak for noon. 00:31:45.75,00:31:48.66 Honey, I know that,[br]but you know that I wanted to see... 00:31:48.75,00:31:52.32 - Hey. Hello there, friend.[br]- Hey. 00:31:52.40,00:31:54.80 How are you guys? How was your evening? 00:31:54.93,00:31:56.28 - Great.[br]- Awesome. 00:31:56.58,00:31:59.10 - I can't feel anything.[br]- All right. 00:31:59.62,00:32:02.02 - Does that feel good?[br]- I still can't feel anything. 00:32:02.10,00:32:04.32 Okay, 'cause it hurts me. 00:32:04.41,00:32:07.24 - Would you do that for me?[br]- Yeah. 00:32:08.15,00:32:11.93 - Yeah.[br]- No, no, no. No. 00:32:12.45,00:32:15.37 God put our mouths on our head[br]for a reason. No! 00:32:17.85,00:32:20.24 - I'm going to the bathroom.[br]- Okay. 00:32:21.28,00:32:26.20 - Is everything okay with...[br]- Waffles. 00:32:29.76,00:32:33.07 - Here you go, sir. Breakfast of champions.[br]- Oh, thank you. 00:32:33.20,00:32:37.77 And don't tell anybody, but...[br]A little extra love for you. 00:32:39.55,00:32:40.68 Thank you. 00:32:40.81,00:32:43.20 - Take it easy.[br]- You, too. 00:32:55.81,00:32:57.60 - Hi.[br]- Hi. 00:32:57.77,00:32:59.16 This is the yoga place, yeah? 00:32:59.25,00:33:02.60 Yes. But there's no alcohol allowed[br]in the studio. 00:33:03.34,00:33:07.47 Oh, no, I mean, obviously.[br]This is just pineapple juice. 00:33:08.73,00:33:12.17 Well, there's no outside drinks[br]allowed in the studio. 00:33:13.12,00:33:14.47 - Can I set it down?[br]- Sure. 00:33:14.69,00:33:16.86 - Cool, thank you.[br]- I like your hat. 00:33:16.99,00:33:20.12 - Thank you.[br]- Please remove it before class. 00:33:22.82,00:33:25.95 Hey, everyone,[br]why don't you all grab your mats? 00:33:27.91,00:33:32.08 Sorry, I recognise you from the cover[br]of Namaste Magazine. I'm a huge fan. 00:33:32.39,00:33:34.61 Thank you. That's so sweet of you to say. 00:33:34.82,00:33:38.48 I appreciate that.[br]Obviously, I don't do yoga for recognition. 00:33:38.65,00:33:42.52 Right, of course you wouldn't.[br]Then stop being so good at it. 00:33:44.39,00:33:46.91 That's very flexible. That's nice. 00:33:49.09,00:33:52.31 - And, you, I recognise you from your show.[br]- Thank you. 00:33:52.44,00:33:54.83 You seem much taller on your show. 00:33:55.79,00:33:57.96 - I'm not.[br]- No, I know. 00:34:00.14,00:34:03.48 Okay, if you just wanna start[br]by bringing your palms into your chest. 00:34:03.70,00:34:07.44 Today we're gonna start with[br]the Surya Namaskar, or Sun Salutation. 00:34:07.53,00:34:09.75 Let's take a deep inale in. 00:34:10.27,00:34:12.36 Exhale and release the hands. 00:34:12.44,00:34:15.27 Inale, arms up to the sky. Continue. 00:34:16.31,00:34:19.23 Good, exhale and folding forward. 00:34:19.97,00:34:24.14 Strong, strong backs. Good, excellent. 00:34:24.23,00:34:26.01 Remember this is not a competition, 00:34:26.23,00:34:28.49 although you two seem[br]to be the best in the class. 00:34:28.71,00:34:31.10 Excellent. Perfect form, you two, perfect. 00:34:31.23,00:34:33.93 Coming up into downward-facing dog. 00:34:34.54,00:34:36.75 Good. It's really important in this pose, 00:34:36.97,00:34:40.19 that you arch your back[br]and keep it flat at the same time. 00:34:40.28,00:34:42.80 I feel like those are opposing ideas. 00:34:43.02,00:34:47.19 No, they're not, 'cause you're arching[br]your back up while it's flat. 00:34:47.28,00:34:48.41 Okay. 00:34:50.93,00:34:55.11 Good, yeah, sweat it out.[br]Sweat out all the toxins from this morning. 00:34:55.41,00:34:57.59 - Come on, lady.[br]- My name is Prana, 00:34:57.72,00:34:59.98 and I know that wasn't just juice. 00:35:00.20,00:35:04.68 You don't really need any adjusting,[br]so I'm just gonna do this for myself. 00:35:05.33,00:35:07.41 Just to learn from your body, 00:35:07.72,00:35:09.37 memorize your body. 00:35:10.20,00:35:12.81 - Good. Strong legs.[br]- Come on. 00:35:13.76,00:35:15.77 Perfect skin and form. 00:35:16.68,00:35:19.72 Okay, class, I'd like to now[br]move into a tripod headstand. 00:35:19.90,00:35:21.59 This is more of an advanced pose, 00:35:21.81,00:35:24.51 so if you don't feel comfortable[br]or strong enough, 00:35:24.59,00:35:28.38 please feel free to just lay on your mat[br]in child's pose. 00:35:28.46,00:35:29.73 I got it. 00:35:29.94,00:35:32.94 All right, so let's all come down to our mats. 00:35:33.16,00:35:36.29 Get in a prep position[br]for the tripod headstand. 00:35:36.38,00:35:37.42 If you don't feel comfortable, 00:35:37.64,00:35:40.77 there's no shame[br]in just laying on your mat in child's pose. 00:35:40.86,00:35:42.34 Lady, I got it. 00:35:42.43,00:35:45.34 Good, so let's prep to come up. Good. 00:35:46.82,00:35:49.86 Sir, if you just want to lay down[br]in child's pose. 00:35:49.95,00:35:50.99 Now, you all heard me say, 00:35:51.08,00:35:54.12 "If you want to be in child's pose,[br]that's okay. " 00:35:54.21,00:35:56.30 - Just in case he gets hurt.[br]- Bring it, bring it. 00:35:56.43,00:35:58.60 I don't want you to break your neck. 00:35:58.82,00:36:00.26 - What's up?[br]- Just relax. 00:36:00.47,00:36:02.34 My legs, that's what. 00:36:02.47,00:36:04.65 We're doing quiet headstands today. 00:36:04.74,00:36:07.69 I'm doing a handstand, motherfucker![br]I'm doing a handstand. 00:36:07.78,00:36:09.43 Okay, you know, why don't we just release. 00:36:09.56,00:36:10.78 Thank God. 00:36:11.22,00:36:13.74 Good, everybody. Good. 00:36:18.00,00:36:19.13 Hey. 00:36:19.44,00:36:20.91 Are you Chuck? 00:36:21.00,00:36:24.35 Oh, man, you know,[br]they won't change that flyer. 00:36:24.65,00:36:28.00 That's my mainland name.[br]My Hawaiian name is Koonu. 00:36:28.44,00:36:29.66 Cool, sorry. 00:36:29.87,00:36:31.05 No, it's all good. 00:36:31.13,00:36:34.18 Does Koonu have some, like,[br]cool Hawaiian meaning? 00:36:34.27,00:36:36.14 It means Chuck. 00:36:36.22,00:36:37.70 I plugged it into a database. 00:36:37.92,00:36:41.05 There's a thing you can go on,[br]on the Internet, you just type in your name, 00:36:41.27,00:36:42.31 and it just says it. 00:36:44.35,00:36:45.31 What's your name? 00:36:45.53,00:36:46.66 - I'm Peter.[br]- Peter. 00:36:46.88,00:36:48.44 - Yeah.[br]- I'm gonna give you a Hawaiian name. 00:36:48.53,00:36:49.79 Oh, great. 00:36:53.36,00:36:54.71 Pepiopi. 00:36:57.01,00:36:59.19 - Great.[br]- Pepiopi, looks like you've got a little pain 00:36:59.40,00:37:01.14 behind those eyes. 00:37:02.71,00:37:04.49 Yeah, maybe a little. 00:37:05.32,00:37:07.40 There's really only one cure for that. 00:37:07.54,00:37:08.58 What's that? 00:37:08.67,00:37:10.32 Weed. You got any? 00:37:12.62,00:37:15.02 - No.[br]- Well, then let's go surfing. 00:37:18.15,00:37:21.28 Okay, when we're out there,[br]I want you to ignore your instincts. 00:37:21.50,00:37:24.54 I'm gonna be your instincts.[br]Koonu will be your instincts. 00:37:24.71,00:37:26.11 Don't do anything. 00:37:26.19,00:37:28.58 Don't try to surf, don't do it. 00:37:29.54,00:37:31.72 The less you do, the more you do. 00:37:31.93,00:37:34.24 Let's see you pop up. Pop it up! 00:37:38.28,00:37:39.41 That's not it at all. 00:37:39.54,00:37:40.98 Do less. Get down. Try less. Do it again. 00:37:43.28,00:37:44.42 Pop up. 00:37:45.15,00:37:46.85 No, too slow. Do less. 00:37:46.94,00:37:48.07 Pop up. 00:37:48.72,00:37:49.76 Pop up. 00:37:49.85,00:37:52.16 You're doing too much. Do less. Pop down. 00:37:52.24,00:37:53.42 Pop up now. 00:37:53.59,00:37:54.85 Stop! Get down. Get down there. 00:37:55.07,00:37:57.16 Remember, don't do anything. 00:37:57.90,00:37:59.46 Nothing. Pop up. 00:38:02.16,00:38:03.72 Well, you... No, you gotta do more than that, 00:38:03.81,00:38:04.99 'cause you're just laying right out. 00:38:05.07,00:38:06.12 It looks like you're boogie-boarding. 00:38:06.25,00:38:08.33 Just do it. Feel it. Pop up. 00:38:09.99,00:38:12.90 Yeah. That wasn't quite it,[br]but we're gonna figure it out, out there. 00:38:12.99,00:38:14.03 Let's go surfing, come on. 00:38:14.16,00:38:16.12 Everybody's learning how, come on and... 00:38:16.25,00:38:18.55 The weather outside is weather 00:38:20.21,00:38:22.30 How long you lived out here? 00:38:22.38,00:38:25.30 Man, I don't know. I quit wearing a watch[br]when I moved out here. 00:38:25.43,00:38:27.82 - Wow, that's so cool.[br]- Yeah. 00:38:27.90,00:38:31.99 No, like my cell phone has a clock on it,[br]so I don't really need it. 00:38:32.08,00:38:34.82 Right, so it's basically the same thing. 00:38:35.43,00:38:38.65 - How old are you?[br]- I don't really believe in age or numbers, 00:38:38.78,00:38:41.56 you know, I don't...[br]I mean, if you had to put a number on it, 00:38:41.69,00:38:44.08 I guess I'd be 44. 00:38:46.48,00:38:47.61 Fuck! 00:38:48.35,00:38:50.65 Thanks for taking me out here. 00:38:51.78,00:38:54.69 This is the first time I've felt good[br]in three weeks or so. 00:38:54.91,00:38:57.52 You need to get back on that board[br]is what you need to do. 00:38:57.65,00:38:59.52 - Yeah?[br]- Hey, here's the deal. 00:38:59.61,00:39:00.96 When life gives you lemons, 00:39:01.18,00:39:03.35 just say, "Fuck the lemons," and bail. 00:39:03.48,00:39:06.18 Yeah. No. You said it, totally. 00:39:06.31,00:39:08.26 You gotta just pull yourself up[br]by your wetsuit, 00:39:08.48,00:39:09.44 get back on that board... 00:39:09.61,00:39:11.09 Hey, look, man,[br]if you're attacked by a shark, 00:39:11.31,00:39:12.74 are you gonna give up surfing? 00:39:12.87,00:39:14.53 Probably, yeah. 00:39:14.61,00:39:17.35 Let's go in, all right. Tacos are on me. 00:39:18.09,00:39:20.35 Can you try to listen[br]to what I'm saying to you, Brian? 00:39:20.57,00:39:23.09 I'm confused and I don't know what to do. 00:39:23.18,00:39:24.44 What's up with that hat? 00:39:24.66,00:39:27.27 What are you[br]in the Buena Vista Social Club? 00:39:27.36,00:39:28.49 This is a nice hat. 00:39:28.62,00:39:31.31 What member of the Brat Pack are you? 00:39:31.53,00:39:34.45 You look like one of those guys[br]suspected of killing JFK. 00:39:34.53,00:39:36.84 That's very funny. That's great. 00:39:36.92,00:39:38.92 Tell him to make friends. 00:39:39.23,00:39:41.53 You need to get out there[br]and make some friends, man. 00:39:41.75,00:39:43.19 Is Liz there right now? 00:39:43.40,00:39:45.49 No, no, she's not in here, buddy. 00:39:45.58,00:39:46.62 I just heard her. 00:39:46.84,00:39:48.19 She's gone. 00:39:48.84,00:39:50.71 Who are you looking at? 00:39:50.93,00:39:51.97 What? 00:39:52.06,00:39:53.75 Is she still... Hi, Liz. 00:39:53.84,00:39:57.71 No. I swear on my mother's grave, it...[br]Okay, it was Liz. 00:39:58.02,00:39:59.97 She wasn't here the entire time. 00:40:00.10,00:40:02.28 Go out and meet people.[br]We meet people all the time... 00:40:02.41,00:40:03.84 - All the time on vacation.[br]- Constantly. 00:40:03.93,00:40:06.89 I've tried, all right,[br]there's a couple of dudes here, 00:40:07.06,00:40:09.15 but they're kind of weird. 00:40:09.50,00:40:11.37 Just be friendly. 00:40:11.46,00:40:12.59 Iron your shirt. 00:40:12.72,00:40:14.06 Iron your shirt, look sharp. 00:40:14.28,00:40:15.85 Even your T-shirts. 00:40:16.37,00:40:18.98 There is this girl at the front desk[br]who's pretty cute. 00:40:19.72,00:40:22.50 Oh, yeah. You know what?[br]Go have another dirty one night stand. 00:40:22.63,00:40:24.37 That worked out so well before. 00:40:24.50,00:40:27.42 What do you want from me?[br]You just told me I need to meet people. 00:40:27.50,00:40:30.03 Ask her out.[br]Maybe that's what he needs, is a rebound. 00:40:30.11,00:40:31.98 He's had plenty of chances[br]for rebounds. This isn't... 00:40:32.20,00:40:33.24 Can we get on the same team here? 00:40:33.46,00:40:36.51 Okay, I'm sorry.[br]We're on the same team. Sorry. 00:40:37.72,00:40:39.51 You should go on a date with this girl. 00:40:39.59,00:40:40.86 Well, maybe I'll ask her out then. 00:40:41.07,00:40:42.94 - Yes.[br]- My wife says so. 00:40:43.38,00:40:46.20 - Hey, I'm in Hawaii, too![br]Oh, that's neat. 00:40:46.60,00:40:48.38 Aloha, bitches! 00:40:49.42,00:40:50.99 That's very cool. 00:40:54.21,00:40:56.73 They're not Native Americans, Brian. 00:40:59.12,00:41:00.25 - Bri...[br]- What are you doing? 00:41:00.47,00:41:02.47 - The luha. Is that right?[br]- Oh, yeah. 00:41:02.77,00:41:03.90 It's called the hula. 00:41:04.12,00:41:05.78 - Luau?[br]- No, hula. 00:41:05.99,00:41:06.95 You're doing a luau? 00:41:21.52,00:41:22.56 - Hey.[br]- Hey. 00:41:22.69,00:41:23.82 - Peter.[br]- Wow. 00:41:25.39,00:41:28.43 You look beautiful.[br]I mean, that's a beautiful dress. 00:41:28.61,00:41:29.56 - Thank you.[br]- Yeah. 00:41:29.78,00:41:31.00 This'll be fun. 00:41:31.22,00:41:32.39 Lei? 00:41:37.09,00:41:39.78 May I help you with something else, Peter? 00:41:40.09,00:41:42.09 No, I'll just grab a drink.[br]I'm just gonna head inside. 00:41:42.18,00:41:44.57 - Happy 4th of July![br]- Thank you. 00:41:46.96,00:41:47.92 Aloha! 00:42:01.79,00:42:03.66 - You done here?[br]- No, actually, I just sat down, 00:42:03.88,00:42:05.62 I'm just getting started.[br]It's delicious, though, thank you. 00:42:05.83,00:42:07.83 I'll just go fuck myself. 00:42:07.92,00:42:09.71 - Sorry, what?[br]- Mahalo. 00:42:12.75,00:42:13.97 Hi, Peter. 00:42:15.84,00:42:17.40 Hey. Hey, bro. 00:42:19.40,00:42:20.88 - Hi.[br]- Hey, all right. 00:42:21.06,00:42:22.84 Excuse me. Excuse me. 00:42:22.93,00:42:26.06 Everybody, can I have your attention[br]for one second, please. 00:42:26.19,00:42:29.10 We have a very special guest[br]with us here, today. 00:42:29.19,00:42:33.36 He is the lead singer[br]of the band, Infant Sorrow, 00:42:34.19,00:42:37.76 one of my favourite musicians of all time.[br]He's so awesome. 00:42:38.80,00:42:40.97 Please, please, let's take... 00:42:41.50,00:42:45.67 Let's see if we can get him up here,[br]Mr Aldous Snow. Please, come on. 00:42:46.72,00:42:47.76 Share your gift. 00:42:47.89,00:42:49.11 Duty calls and all that. 00:42:49.24,00:42:52.98 I'm trying to be incognito, it's weird.[br]It's like work to me, this is no fun. 00:42:53.20,00:42:54.76 Hey! Thank you! 00:43:03.50,00:43:05.89 Thank you.[br]What a lovely introduction. 00:43:06.11,00:43:08.50 What an eccentric and confident young man. 00:43:08.63,00:43:12.07 I'd like to dedicate this song[br]to a very beautiful woman that's here today. 00:43:12.29,00:43:14.98 It's Miss Sarah Marshall, there she is. 00:43:15.90,00:43:17.07 Look at her, blimey! 00:43:25.51,00:43:27.90 Old as ancient skies 00:43:28.20,00:43:30.81 I've had these wandering eyes 00:43:31.64,00:43:33.95 but you took me by surprise 00:43:34.08,00:43:36.47 when you let me inside you 00:43:38.43,00:43:40.12 Inside you 00:43:40.82,00:43:42.90 Inside you 00:43:43.25,00:43:44.69 This went from 6:00 to midnight. 00:43:44.82,00:43:48.95 Teach me how to grow[br]while I'm moving inside of you 00:43:50.95,00:43:52.73 Inside of you 00:43:53.65,00:43:55.95 - Inside you[br]- Inside you 00:43:57.21,00:44:00.04 I long to be, is it wrong to be 00:44:00.13,00:44:02.43 inside of you 00:44:03.35,00:44:07.52 Inside of you the restless find their dreams 00:44:09.61,00:44:13.48 Inside of you this king has found his queen 00:44:20.13,00:44:21.18 Hey. 00:44:21.31,00:44:22.44 You're from the breakfast buffet, right? 00:44:22.65,00:44:23.57 - Yeah.[br]- Whipped cream or berries? 00:44:23.70,00:44:24.74 Yeah. Yeah, I'm Peter. 00:44:26.83,00:44:27.66 - Kemo.[br]- Kemo. 00:44:27.74,00:44:29.96 - Good to meet you, man.[br]- Good to meet, you, man. 00:44:30.18,00:44:32.44 - Have a beer.[br]- Thanks. Thank you. 00:44:34.96,00:44:36.40 Sarah Marshall. 00:44:36.53,00:44:37.57 Yes. 00:44:39.22,00:44:41.23 How do you know[br]I was dating Sarah Marshall? 00:44:41.31,00:44:43.83 Dwayne told me. Chuck told me. 00:44:44.66,00:44:45.79 Even Rachel told me. 00:44:46.01,00:44:49.97 I heard about it from everybody.[br]You gotta stop talking about it. 00:44:50.40,00:44:52.49 It's like The Sopranos. 00:44:52.66,00:44:53.92 It's over. 00:44:54.58,00:44:56.23 Find a new show. 00:44:57.80,00:44:59.36 You need a hug. 00:44:59.66,00:45:01.14 Come here. 00:45:02.88,00:45:04.36 Oh, thank you. 00:45:04.45,00:45:06.23 You're awfully nice. 00:45:07.49,00:45:10.19 I gotta go.[br]I'm prepping the pig for tomorrow's luau. 00:45:10.32,00:45:13.02 You should come and help me.[br]It'll take your mind off of things. 00:45:13.23,00:45:15.10 - Yeah? You don't mind?[br]- No. 00:45:15.63,00:45:18.32 I mean, I must say I'm a pretty good cook. 00:45:18.76,00:45:20.02 All right! 00:45:23.24,00:45:25.93 I can't! Please don't make me do this! 00:45:26.15,00:45:27.19 Do it! 00:45:27.28,00:45:29.80 I'm sorry! I'm sorry! 00:45:34.59,00:45:36.15 You can stop crying now. 00:45:36.37,00:45:37.94 He's dead already. 00:45:38.46,00:45:39.94 I'm not crying. 00:45:40.02,00:45:41.28 You should stop crying. 00:45:41.50,00:45:43.02 I don't cry. I'm not a baby. 00:45:43.16,00:45:46.07 Really?[br]'Cause you look like a gigantic baby. 00:45:46.37,00:45:48.98 I'm sorry. I didn't mean that at all. 00:45:58.68,00:45:59.94 Hey. 00:46:00.16,00:46:04.64 Listen, would you like to hang out tonight,[br]like, not in an official hotel function? 00:46:04.73,00:46:05.99 Yeah. Totally. 00:46:06.20,00:46:08.68 A bunch of us are going to go to this,[br]like, little beach thing afterwards. 00:46:08.81,00:46:11.08 You're totally welcome to come. 00:46:11.60,00:46:13.29 Maybe we could go together? 00:46:13.51,00:46:14.95 Yeah, whatever. 00:46:15.38,00:46:16.60 I mean we don't have to,[br]if you don't want to, 00:46:16.82,00:46:17.77 I just thought that maybe... 00:46:17.86,00:46:19.34 No, listen,[br]you don't have to make this weird. 00:46:19.43,00:46:21.21 You either want to go or you don't. 00:46:22.77,00:46:24.43 - I would love to.[br]- Okay. 00:46:25.08,00:46:27.69 Awesome. Why don't you go upstairs,[br]change that shirt, 00:46:27.86,00:46:30.60 and I'll meet you out front in, like, five? 00:46:40.69,00:46:43.82 - This is so cool.[br]- You like it? 00:46:56.78,00:46:59.05 So what brought you to Hawaii? 00:47:00.39,00:47:02.70 - A dude.[br]- Of course. 00:47:02.83,00:47:06.05 A surfer dude. You know, WCT, top 44. 00:47:09.40,00:47:10.53 Totally. 00:47:12.31,00:47:14.70 We were together for two years. 00:47:15.01,00:47:17.70 Dropped out of school,[br]moved out here with him. 00:47:17.83,00:47:19.92 Three weeks later,[br]I caught him cheating on me, 00:47:20.14,00:47:22.40 so I moved out, and that's that. 00:47:23.44,00:47:25.01 What an asshole. 00:47:25.97,00:47:27.53 No, he's just a boy. 00:47:30.01,00:47:33.88 You ever think about going back home,[br]finishing school, or... 00:47:35.23,00:47:36.19 No. 00:47:37.01,00:47:39.01 No. I work at the hotel, 00:47:40.06,00:47:42.75 doesn't really have to be a future in there. 00:47:44.10,00:47:45.58 Okay, my turn. 00:47:45.97,00:47:47.15 Okay. 00:47:47.97,00:47:52.15 So, how do you like[br]writing music for a TV show? 00:47:55.15,00:47:57.45 It's great, you know. People are great. 00:47:57.54,00:48:00.58 It's great to have a steady paycheque.[br]It's... I'm very lucky. 00:48:00.67,00:48:01.71 Oh, my God, you hate it. 00:48:01.93,00:48:04.11 I fucking hate it so much. 00:48:04.45,00:48:06.72 So then, do something about it. 00:48:10.50,00:48:11.41 Excuse me. 00:48:11.63,00:48:14.76 I'm just saying, if you hate something,[br]change it. 00:48:14.85,00:48:16.55 - Don't dwell.[br]- Well, I'm trying. 00:48:18.63,00:48:21.24 I'm actually working on a rock opera. 00:48:22.29,00:48:23.72 - Yeah?[br]- Yeah. 00:48:25.07,00:48:27.29 What's your rock opera about? 00:48:29.77,00:48:31.03 Dracula. 00:48:32.51,00:48:35.29 Yeah, and eternal love, you know.[br]That's the theme. 00:48:35.42,00:48:38.86 But I think the two sort of go hand in hand,[br]you know? 00:48:39.38,00:48:40.64 And I... 00:48:42.73,00:48:45.73 I have this vision of doing it with puppets. 00:48:48.55,00:48:50.34 I mean, humans also, you know. 00:48:52.82,00:48:54.16 Why Dracula? 00:48:54.29,00:48:58.04 Because he's a man like anyone else.[br]He just wants to be loved. 00:48:58.25,00:48:59.90 And every time he gets close[br]to a human woman, 00:49:00.12,00:49:01.69 he ends up smothering and killing her, 00:49:01.78,00:49:04.38 which is a feeling I am familiar with. 00:49:04.51,00:49:06.39 What? That's just a joke. 00:49:06.60,00:49:08.34 - Oh, shit.[br]- What? 00:49:09.21,00:49:12.21 My ex. If I run, you run. 00:49:13.78,00:49:15.56 - Do you understand?[br]- No, I don't understand at all. 00:49:15.78,00:49:17.52 Fucking motherfucker! Dipshit! 00:49:17.65,00:49:18.56 Rachel, what are you doing? 00:49:18.78,00:49:20.43 I thought I told you[br]to stay back on your island. 00:49:20.56,00:49:21.61 Take it easy, just take it easy. 00:49:21.69,00:49:22.87 Yeah, you know what?[br]The deal was over April 9. 00:49:22.96,00:49:25.13 Well, the deal's back on, motherfucker. 00:49:25.26,00:49:27.13 You ain't the chief in this village.[br]I'm the chief. 00:49:27.35,00:49:28.39 Of the idiots? 00:49:28.48,00:49:31.17 Rachel, let me handle this. I know his friend.[br]Let me handle this, okay? 00:49:31.31,00:49:32.74 Go ahead. 00:49:33.61,00:49:35.57 Hey, man, you remember me from breakfast? 00:49:35.78,00:49:38.39 - Oh, yeah, the cocktail guy, that's right.[br]- Yeah. 00:49:38.48,00:49:41.61 This ain't the breakfast buffet.[br]What, you with my girl? 00:49:41.74,00:49:43.83 Keeping her warm for me at night, huh? 00:49:44.00,00:49:46.00 Hey, what are you doing here? 00:49:50.05,00:49:51.53 That's right. Just hit him! 00:49:51.61,00:49:52.88 Rachel, we gotta get out of here. Rachel? 00:49:53.01,00:49:55.05 You get what you deserve. 00:50:07.05,00:50:10.62 Just a boy?[br]No, that dude was a fucking man. 00:50:10.84,00:50:14.66 No, no, no. He's an asshole.[br]I can't believe I ever dated him. 00:50:15.62,00:50:17.40 - You went nuts.[br]- Yeah. 00:50:17.93,00:50:20.40 You guys are dysfunctional. 00:50:21.01,00:50:23.45 You were like one of those girls[br]from Flavour of Love. 00:50:23.54,00:50:24.88 - From what?[br]- You were. 00:50:25.02,00:50:26.89 "I'll kill you. I'll kill you. " 00:50:28.23,00:50:30.10 Okay, I'm gonna go get us another round. 00:50:30.19,00:50:32.19 I'll grab it. It's no big deal. 00:50:32.28,00:50:35.93 You don't have to dote on me.[br]I'm not that type of girl. 00:50:48.76,00:50:50.33 You look so hot. 00:50:50.46,00:50:52.72 Give me Crime Scene.[br]Give me dirty Crime Scene girl. 00:50:52.94,00:50:55.02 Andr� the Giant, out of the shot, please. 00:50:55.11,00:50:57.11 Mutombo, out of the shot, come on. 00:51:25.60,00:51:28.90 Did you know that there's a picture[br]of you flashing, 00:51:29.03,00:51:30.47 hanging in the men's room? 00:51:30.69,00:51:33.60 Yeah. I hate it so much. 00:51:33.73,00:51:36.34 My jackass boyfriend made me do it. 00:51:36.95,00:51:38.82 Keoki took it, right there. 00:51:38.91,00:51:40.99 And I asked him to take it down, 00:51:41.12,00:51:44.56 but he said that it would ruin[br]the balance of the collage. 00:51:45.60,00:51:47.17 Do you want me to try[br]to get it down for you? 00:51:47.39,00:51:51.04 No. No, no, no, he'll kill you.[br]Like, really kill you. 00:51:53.00,00:51:55.30 But I have a surprise for you. 00:51:55.82,00:51:57.08 Really, what? 00:51:57.17,00:51:58.43 We're gonna take a quick break. 00:51:58.65,00:52:00.61 Tonight we have a special guest[br]from the mainland, 00:52:00.74,00:52:03.52 singing a song from his Dracula musical, 00:52:03.87,00:52:06.87 please welcome to the stage,[br]Mr Peter Bretter. 00:52:08.74,00:52:09.91 Peter! 00:52:10.00,00:52:11.65 Yeah! Go get them, tiger! 00:52:11.78,00:52:12.70 Please don't. 00:52:14.04,00:52:15.31 Peter! 00:52:15.61,00:52:18.05 - Rachel...[br]- Dracula! Peter! 00:52:23.44,00:52:24.70 Get them! 00:52:24.92,00:52:25.83 What's up? 00:52:32.53,00:52:33.88 Thank you. 00:52:36.70,00:52:38.14 You know, I could play something else. 00:52:38.27,00:52:39.70 I just think out of context this might be... 00:52:39.92,00:52:41.49 Dracula musical! 00:52:43.49,00:52:44.84 Thank you. 00:53:05.06,00:53:09.54 It's getting kind of hard to believe[br]things are going to get better 00:53:11.84,00:53:17.58 I've been drowning too long to believe[br]that the tide's going to turn 00:53:19.32,00:53:24.46 And I've been living too hard to believe[br]things are going to get easier now 00:53:26.63,00:53:31.24 I'm still trying to shake off the pain[br]from the lessons I've learned 00:53:33.85,00:53:38.63 And if I see Van Helsing, I swear to the lord[br]I will slay him 00:53:41.03,00:53:45.20 Take it from me, but I swear[br]I won't let it be so 00:53:47.72,00:53:52.59 Blood will run down his face[br]when he is decapitated 00:53:54.07,00:53:57.90 His head on my mantle[br]is how I will let this one know 00:53:59.38,00:54:01.16 How much I love you 00:54:08.86,00:54:10.03 Die 00:54:10.95,00:54:11.99 Die 00:54:13.17,00:54:14.21 Die 00:54:18.78,00:54:19.91 I can't 00:54:31.52,00:54:32.87 Awesome! 00:54:33.39,00:54:34.82 Thank you. 00:54:38.78,00:54:39.74 Thank you. 00:54:40.17,00:54:43.17 So, I had a really, really great time tonight. 00:54:43.26,00:54:45.35 - Yeah?[br]- Yeah. I mean, it got a little wild. 00:54:45.56,00:54:47.44 - "A little"? You can say that.[br]- Yeah. 00:54:47.57,00:54:50.26 But it was really fun,[br]and you're so cool, and it was... 00:54:50.35,00:54:52.05 Thank you for taking me out. 00:54:52.13,00:54:53.83 No, I had a great time. Thank you. 00:54:55.57,00:54:57.13 - You did?[br]- Yeah. 00:55:01.31,00:55:03.40 I'm sorry. 00:55:03.53,00:55:07.66 I'm sorry, I just... I don't...[br]I just don't wanna complicate things. 00:55:07.79,00:55:09.14 - No, of course![br]- Yeah? 00:55:09.22,00:55:12.36 No, no, no. Totally. I totally get that. 00:55:12.57,00:55:14.66 - I had a great time.[br]- A handshake? 00:55:14.79,00:55:18.01 - Well, I don't know. Okay.[br]- All right, all right. 00:55:18.10,00:55:20.71 - All right. Get home safe.[br]- You, too. 00:55:23.84,00:55:25.84 - Thanks again.[br]- Bye. 00:55:33.10,00:55:36.67 [br]I'm on a hammock with me lady 00:55:36.88,00:55:40.23 Watching the sea roll by 00:55:42.49,00:55:45.10 Things have been great now 00:55:45.23,00:55:48.45 'Cause we're in Hawaii 00:55:50.32,00:55:51.80 Hey, guys. 00:55:52.93,00:55:55.11 Hey, man. I'm Koonu. 00:55:55.98,00:55:59.19 Yeah. No, I remember. I'm Peter.[br]We took a surf lesson together. 00:55:59.28,00:56:02.72 Yeah, you're that guy[br]that works with Kaiser Permanente. 00:56:02.85,00:56:06.37 No, I'm Peter.[br]We had a nice talk out on the water. 00:56:06.50,00:56:07.94 That's cool. 00:56:10.15,00:56:12.11 Okay, can I just say something? 00:56:12.24,00:56:15.68 - I went on a date tonight with Rachel, right?[br]- That wasn't a date. 00:56:15.76,00:56:17.76 She's in customer service, dude. 00:56:17.85,00:56:19.85 She took you out for charity. 00:56:20.03,00:56:24.20 It was a date, okay? Trust me.[br]I know a date, and that was a date. 00:56:24.42,00:56:25.55 I bet you think strippers like you, too. 00:56:25.68,00:56:26.72 - That's really not necessary.[br]- It's true. 00:56:28.68,00:56:31.73 Don't waste your time, man.[br]Believe me, it is a nowhere road. I know. 00:56:31.81,00:56:34.73 Did you see her ex-boyfriend?[br]He is ridiculous. 00:56:34.86,00:56:37.03 Who, Greg? I love Greg, man. 00:56:37.25,00:56:39.86 I saw him beat up a guy with a starfish. 00:56:40.08,00:56:43.08 - Okay, that's just ridiculous.[br]- That guy was me. 00:56:43.21,00:56:45.99 Dude, my homie over here,[br]on his honeymoon? 00:56:46.21,00:56:48.73 Getting as much sex[br]as he possibly can ever have. 00:56:48.82,00:56:50.60 Are you giving to her[br]hard and rough, dude? 00:56:50.69,00:56:52.16 Come on. 00:56:53.51,00:56:59.34 The wife wants me to do certain things[br]that I find inappropriate. 00:56:59.56,00:57:02.39 Let me just say[br]that if God was a city planner, 00:57:02.47,00:57:06.26 he would not put a playground[br]next to a sewage system. 00:57:08.52,00:57:12.61 We're trying to fuck,[br]but we're not having fun fucking. 00:57:12.69,00:57:16.65 We're just, like...[br]I'm stabbing her private parts, 00:57:19.26,00:57:22.70 and it's not fun, and it causes anxiety.[br]Fucking is... 00:57:22.91,00:57:24.48 And then when you're not fucking... 00:57:24.61,00:57:27.31 - Hey, someone's gotta stop him.[br]- You're the butt of a joke. 00:57:27.39,00:57:29.78 Fucking this ring is... 00:57:30.00,00:57:31.57 Fuck! 00:57:31.70,00:57:33.78 It's gonna be all right. 00:57:35.53,00:57:36.79 Hi. 00:57:38.35,00:57:40.74 Hi, do you wanna come back to bed? 00:57:40.87,00:57:42.00 Sure. 00:57:45.01,00:57:46.27 Have fun. 00:57:47.83,00:57:52.01 I like her hair.[br]I wonder if the carpet matches her pubes. 00:58:00.05,00:58:01.79 Julian, what's up? 00:58:04.23,00:58:05.14 Oh. 00:58:06.19,00:58:07.45 God. 00:58:17.67,00:58:19.45 The show's been cancelled. 00:58:19.62,00:58:21.41 That's good, 'cause that's what you wanted. 00:58:21.54,00:58:24.02 Yeah. Yeah, it is. 00:58:25.37,00:58:30.50 It's just... I guess[br]I thought we had another year left. 00:58:30.58,00:58:32.67 It seems like we did, and... This'll be good, 00:58:32.89,00:58:36.02 'cause it's been a long-awaited transition[br]into film for me. 00:58:36.11,00:58:39.37 Don't get me wrong, but it's just...[br]It's a surprise. 00:58:39.46,00:58:41.11 Come on tour with me. 00:58:41.24,00:58:46.02 I'll serenade you every night[br]in front of thousands of women. 00:58:46.11,00:58:47.81 I didn't know you were going on tour. 00:58:48.02,00:58:49.15 Yeah, I'm going in two weeks. 00:58:49.24,00:58:53.33 It's like an 18-month tour,[br]43 countries, Infant Sorrow, 00:58:53.42,00:58:55.50 and it's gonna be a massive tour. 00:58:55.63,00:59:00.72 Yeah. I can't come 'cause I have a job.[br]I'm a working actress. 00:59:00.85,00:59:02.59 Not any more. 00:59:02.72,00:59:03.94 You're an unemployed actress, perfect. 00:59:05.64,00:59:09.81 You could be the queen of the groupies,[br]queen of the Sorrow Suckers. 00:59:10.12,00:59:12.42 The Sorrow Suckers. 00:59:12.51,00:59:15.94 Sorrow Suckers.[br]I don't know why they call them that. 00:59:16.16,00:59:19.29 Mr and Mrs Snow, sorry.[br]Sorry to bother you. 00:59:20.95,00:59:22.73 The hotel wanted to offer you[br]some complimentary coconut cake. 00:59:22.81,00:59:26.90 It's from the hotel.[br]It's definitely not from me personally, so... 00:59:28.16,00:59:30.25 - Yeah, thanks.[br]- Okay, great. 00:59:30.34,00:59:33.69 When were you planning on telling me this? 00:59:33.77,00:59:37.34 - I just told you, then.[br]- Yeah. No, I know. 00:59:37.52,00:59:42.21 But telling me now[br]isn't really the same as telling me. 00:59:42.43,00:59:45.04 Well, look, you know,[br]I've not told you I've got genital herpes, 00:59:45.26,00:59:47.56 because it's not inflamed at the moment. 00:59:47.65,00:59:49.65 Do you guys want some champagne[br]with your cake, 00:59:49.74,00:59:51.08 or do you want it without your cake? 00:59:51.21,00:59:52.78 I don't drink. 01:00:00.26,01:00:04.44 All right, so I came here[br]to give you my demo. I just... 01:00:04.74,01:00:07.05 I worship you,[br]and I just wanted to give you my demo. 01:00:08.18,01:00:10.26 Just take a listen and... 01:00:11.31,01:00:12.65 Okay. 01:00:13.39,01:00:16.13 'Cause you know what?[br]You don't wanna be the guy sitting there, 01:00:16.13,01:00:18.83 watching BBC, and saying, 01:00:18.83,01:00:22.57 "Oh, I saw that guy! He was my waiter, 01:00:22.57,01:00:26.66 "and I totally dismissed him[br]like everyone else does in his life. 01:00:26.66,01:00:28.53 "And I totally was wrong, 01:00:28.53,01:00:32.18 "because he's a major, major,[br]major influence on me now, 01:00:32.18,01:00:33.75 "and I feel terrible!" 01:00:37.40,01:00:40.18 That stupid English voice, was that me? 01:00:41.75,01:00:43.45 Unfortunately, yes. 01:00:44.79,01:00:47.71 You're really gonna like it. 01:00:47.71,01:00:50.53 I'll listen to it when you've gone. 01:00:56.58,01:00:59.49 Hey, look, just don't tell anyone at the hotel. 01:01:08.67,01:01:10.85 - What's up, dude?[br]- What's up? 01:01:10.85,01:01:15.67 Peter, I got some really interesting news[br]this morning. 01:01:15.67,01:01:17.63 Aldous gave you gonorrhoea? 01:01:17.63,01:01:20.76 No. Why would I tell you that? 01:01:20.76,01:01:23.37 Crime Scene was cancelled. 01:01:23.37,01:01:24.41 Whoa. 01:01:25.46,01:01:26.50 Wow. 01:01:29.50,01:01:32.24 - You all right?[br]- Yeah. Yeah. 01:01:33.68,01:01:36.20 I mean, I've been waiting[br]to take the next step, 01:01:36.20,01:01:39.11 you know, into features for a long time,[br]so it's a really good thing. 01:01:39.11,01:01:43.90 This isn't The View. I mean, we can have[br]an honest talk about this if we want. 01:01:45.68,01:01:48.73 I don't wanna step out of the spotlight[br]and then be forgotten. 01:01:48.73,01:01:51.42 I don't wanna disappear. I'm freaked out. 01:01:51.42,01:01:54.03 I wanna be honest.[br]I'm really freaked out right now, okay? 01:01:54.03,01:01:58.08 Because, seemingly, the only actresses[br]that actually can survive 01:01:58.08,01:02:01.21 are the ones that show their cooter,[br]and, excuse me, but I refuse to do that. 01:02:01.21,01:02:02.60 I have a little dignity. 01:02:02.60,01:02:05.69 And I don't have the frame[br]to support plastic surgery. I would tip over. 01:02:05.69,01:02:08.12 And I'm not gonna do that.[br]I'm not gonna exploit myself. 01:02:08.12,01:02:12.30 Listen, you're gonna be fine.[br]You have a long career ahead of you. 01:02:12.60,01:02:16.25 You've got, like, four years until you're 30. 01:02:16.25,01:02:17.99 It's gonna be fine. 01:02:21.95,01:02:24.56 - How are you?[br]- I'm screwed. 01:02:24.56,01:02:30.08 Frankly, I don't stand a chance.[br]No, I'll be fine. 01:02:30.08,01:02:33.65 I've been quietly stealing money[br]from you for a long time. 01:02:35.00,01:02:38.57 You're always good at cheering me up,[br]Pete, thank you. 01:02:41.87,01:02:43.57 Die 01:02:44.09,01:02:45.52 Die 01:02:46.26,01:02:47.61 Die 01:02:50.44,01:02:52.09 I can't 01:02:55.87,01:02:59.18 It's really good, Peter.[br]I just don't understand it. I don't. 01:02:59.18,01:03:02.53 I mean, just chalk it up to that.[br]Please don't play it again, 'cause I don't... 01:03:02.53,01:03:04.70 Just listen to it one more time and see... 01:03:06.79,01:03:07.83 Where's Aldous? 01:03:09.92,01:03:12.44 - Mr Snow, may I ask you a question?[br]- Okay. 01:03:12.44,01:03:15.57 I want to please my wife here,[br]on our honeymoon, 01:03:15.57,01:03:16.84 but I don't know what I'm doing. 01:03:16.84,01:03:18.49 You having difficulty sex-wise? 01:03:18.49,01:03:20.79 - Do you not know how to use this?[br]- I know how. 01:03:20.79,01:03:23.58 - Have you had sex before?[br]- We can't. 01:03:23.58,01:03:25.14 - Why?[br]- Our religion. 01:03:25.14,01:03:26.71 Right, 'cause of God and everything? 01:03:26.71,01:03:27.97 Hey, that's not gonna be a problem, 01:03:27.97,01:03:30.27 because God should be present[br]in the bedroom. 01:03:30.27,01:03:32.88 Just tell me specifically what I need to do. 01:03:32.88,01:03:35.80 You need to penetrate deeply[br]and stimulate the clitoris simultaneously. 01:03:35.80,01:03:37.67 That's what you gotta do.[br]That's what it's about. 01:03:37.67,01:03:40.19 If you can involve the anus in that,[br]then that's absolute perfection. 01:03:40.19,01:03:41.23 Got it. 01:03:41.23,01:03:43.63 Explore her ears. 01:03:43.63,01:03:47.06 Find it in you to be a little more circly. 01:03:47.06,01:03:48.19 You are a man. 01:03:48.19,01:03:49.54 God's within you. 01:03:49.54,01:03:51.02 I actually feel okay about it. 01:03:51.02,01:03:53.93 You know, I'm a little scared,[br]but I'll be all right. I'll get another job. 01:03:53.93,01:03:56.63 That's interesting, man.[br]You know what else is interesting? 01:03:56.63,01:03:59.59 - What?[br]- Me on the moon. 01:03:59.59,01:04:01.85 I just wanna talk to you about something.[br]Can you stop? 01:04:01.85,01:04:04.07 - All right, I'm just gonna talk, and then...[br]- Air! 01:04:04.07,01:04:06.55 There was this interesting moment[br]with Sarah. 01:04:06.55,01:04:09.98 Whoa, what? I don't wanna hear about[br]your interesting moment with Sarah, Pete. 01:04:09.98,01:04:11.76 Then who am I supposed to talk to[br]about this? 01:04:11.76,01:04:15.50 Well, not me, because have I ever had[br]an interesting moment with an ex-girlfriend? 01:04:15.50,01:04:18.11 - Do you have an ex-girlfriend? No![br]- No. 01:04:18.11,01:04:19.38 LIZ: No. 01:04:20.42,01:04:23.77 I would really love to get[br]the woman's perspective on the matter. 01:04:23.77,01:04:25.33 - Really?[br]- No. 01:04:25.33,01:04:27.12 But come on in and just sit down. 01:04:27.12,01:04:29.81 - Stay. You have to...[br]- Honey, no, no, the camera's right there. 01:04:29.81,01:04:31.07 No, I know,[br]but I just wanna tell him, though. 01:04:31.07,01:04:33.86 - No, the camera...[br]- Think about how much she's hurt you. 01:04:33.86,01:04:35.03 - Hey, Liz?[br]- Yeah? 01:04:35.03,01:04:37.42 I think you need to move just a tiny bit[br]further away from the microphone. 01:04:37.42,01:04:38.55 - Just...[br]- No, closer. 01:04:38.55,01:04:39.73 - Now a little further.[br]- Okay. 01:04:39.73,01:04:40.86 - Closer.[br]- And then... 01:04:40.86,01:04:42.12 - And then a little further, and then closer.[br]- I don't know. 01:04:43.77,01:04:45.03 - Keep your head down, though.[br]- I'm bad at this thing. 01:04:45.03,01:04:46.69 - Can you hear me?[br]- Yeah, closer. Further away. 01:04:46.69,01:04:49.60 I know what you're doing.[br]That's not funny at all. 01:04:49.60,01:04:50.64 - You stop that.[br]- What? 01:04:52.43,01:04:54.21 - What's he doing?[br]- Come on. Yeah, yeah, real funny. 01:04:55.86,01:04:57.04 Hey, that's a great necklace, Liz. 01:04:57.04,01:04:59.12 - Did you have that a second ago?[br]- Thank you! 01:04:59.12,01:05:01.08 That's gross! 01:05:01.08,01:05:02.56 - LIZ: I don't get it.[br]- Stop it. 01:05:02.56,01:05:06.30 - He's saying if I were to sperm on you...[br]- What? 01:05:06.30,01:05:09.43 ... it would be a pearl necklace.[br]- Why? 01:05:09.43,01:05:11.30 - Real funny.[br]- Sorry. 01:05:13.17,01:05:14.87 Hey, Dracula! 01:05:14.87,01:05:18.09 "And when I see Van Helsing,[br]I swear to the Lord, I'll slay him. " 01:05:21.22,01:05:23.70 That shit is funny, dude! 01:05:23.70,01:05:25.26 Hey, Pete. 01:05:25.26,01:05:27.87 So I was gonna go over[br]to Lazy Joe's later tonight, 01:05:27.87,01:05:29.13 and I wanted to see[br]if you wanted to come and join. 01:05:31.74,01:05:34.44 I think I'm confused,[br]because I thought last night... 01:05:34.44,01:05:38.44 Oh, my God. Dude, get out of your head.[br]It's really nice out here. 01:05:38.44,01:05:41.14 Yeah, I bet it is. 01:05:41.14,01:05:42.40 All right, yeah. You know what? 01:05:42.40,01:05:43.83 I could totally use a friendly hangout, so... 01:05:43.83,01:05:45.01 All right. 01:05:45.01,01:05:46.57 I don't know if you want,[br]instead of Lazy Joe's, 01:05:46.57,01:05:48.53 I was thinking of going[br]to Laie Point right now. 01:05:48.53,01:05:49.88 - Really?[br]- Yeah. 01:05:49.88,01:05:52.27 I heard that place was a pain in the ass. 01:05:53.44,01:05:54.57 Okay. 01:05:55.84,01:05:57.18 - Hey![br]Yo, what's up, guys? 01:05:57.18,01:05:58.31 We're just going for a hike. 01:05:58.31,01:06:01.14 No, you're not, you're going snorkelling. 01:06:01.14,01:06:02.62 I think we're gonna go on a hike. 01:06:02.62,01:06:05.84 It is sea turtle fucking season, dude.[br]Let's go. 01:06:05.84,01:06:09.28 They fuck for three hours, dude.[br]I mean, that's magical. 01:06:09.28,01:06:11.14 - No, we're going on a hike.[br]- I think we'll go on a hike, yeah. 01:06:11.14,01:06:12.93 What? Your loss. 01:06:14.28,01:06:16.15 Why won't anybody[br]go snorkelling with me? 01:06:22.32,01:06:24.50 How you doing back there? 01:06:25.54,01:06:27.02 Awesome. 01:06:27.02,01:06:30.37 I don't think I've ever been[br]this covered in sweat before. 01:06:30.37,01:06:32.54 It's like I have some sort of fever. 01:06:32.54,01:06:36.72 I told you this was a pain in the ass.[br]Could've been at Lazy Joe's. 01:06:36.80,01:06:38.50 - Oh, yeah.[br]- Uh-huh. 01:06:38.50,01:06:40.37 Oh, shit. 01:06:40.37,01:06:42.02 - You good?[br]- No. 01:06:45.15,01:06:47.85 Wow, we're really going[br]up to the edge of this, huh? 01:06:47.85,01:06:49.11 Look! 01:06:53.29,01:06:55.29 Wow, this is really beautiful. 01:06:58.81,01:07:03.51 All right, so now that your show's done,[br]are you gonna finish the Dracula musical? 01:07:03.51,01:07:05.59 It's not that easy, you know. 01:07:06.73,01:07:09.47 Sarah always thought it was crazy, and... 01:07:09.47,01:07:14.34 Well, you're definitely crazy.[br]But so is everyone, right? So who cares? 01:07:14.34,01:07:17.77 - I just don't feel like doing anything.[br]- Why? 01:07:17.77,01:07:19.16 'Cause my heart is broken, 01:07:19.16,01:07:21.95 and I can't imagine[br]doing anything right now. 01:07:21.95,01:07:25.90 It's probably the same reason[br]you don't go back to school, you know? 01:07:29.47,01:07:32.30 Maybe it's good we got hurt like that,[br]you know? 01:07:32.30,01:07:37.69 I don't know about you,[br]but it makes me feel impervious to pain. 01:07:37.69,01:07:41.34 Yeah. Kind of like[br]there's nothing left to be afraid of. 01:07:41.34,01:07:44.08 - Yeah. No, exactly.[br]- Right. 01:07:44.08,01:07:48.26 We could leap off this rock,[br]and it won't hurt us as bad as they did. 01:07:50.43,01:07:52.39 So jump, then. 01:07:52.39,01:07:54.83 No, I meant that,[br]like, as a metaphor, you know? 01:07:54.83,01:07:56.91 No. Just do it. 01:07:59.83,01:08:02.61 You'll be fine. Jump. 01:08:08.48,01:08:10.35 What the hell? 01:08:12.44,01:08:15.44 Oh, God! Oh, God. I made her kill herself! 01:08:20.88,01:08:22.75 You must be crazy! 01:08:22.75,01:08:25.66 - So are you gonna jump or what?[br]- No! 01:08:25.66,01:08:29.23 Come on, Peter![br]I can see your vagina from here! 01:08:29.23,01:08:32.05 I can see your hoo-ha. 01:08:32.05,01:08:34.44 I mean, I'll jump! 01:08:34.44,01:08:36.53 Chicken! Come on! 01:08:52.89,01:08:56.32 Please, God, don't let me die today. 01:08:58.02,01:08:59.89 - I'm okay![br]- Okay! 01:08:59.89,01:09:02.89 - I'll just let go, right?[br]- No, no, no! 01:09:02.89,01:09:07.06 If you fall straight down,[br]you'd probably hit a rock and kill yourself! 01:09:08.32,01:09:10.28 - Totally.[br]- Yeah. 01:09:10.28,01:09:11.54 So what do I do? 01:09:11.54,01:09:14.37 Why don't you press your feet[br]up against the rock, 01:09:14.37,01:09:16.46 and, like, shoot yourself off! 01:09:16.46,01:09:18.24 - What, like a frog?[br]- I don't know, Peter! 01:09:18.24,01:09:20.94 Just get off the fucking rock! 01:09:20.94,01:09:23.33 - Here I go![br]- Okay! 01:09:23.33,01:09:24.59 One! 01:09:26.46,01:09:27.59 Two! 01:09:28.24,01:09:29.50 Two! 01:09:32.20,01:09:34.51 - Two and a half![br]- Jump! 01:09:34.51,01:09:35.94 Three! 01:09:49.42,01:09:53.16 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God! 01:09:53.16,01:09:55.03 - You saw that, right?[br]- Yeah, yeah, yeah, I saw it! 01:09:55.03,01:09:57.55 I was there. I witnessed it. 01:09:57.55,01:09:58.90 Thanks. 01:10:05.56,01:10:07.04 Come on. 01:10:14.73,01:10:17.78 You've got Christ between your thighs, 01:10:19.00,01:10:21.08 but with a shorter beard. 01:10:21.61,01:10:24.21 - Mahalo.[br]- Aloha. 01:10:24.65,01:10:27.17 - Sex![br]- I'm cramping, I'm cramping. 01:10:27.17,01:10:28.82 - Okay.[br]- Okay, okay. 01:10:31.00,01:10:33.39 Petey? Petey? 01:10:37.26,01:10:40.09 Sorry. I knocked a bunch. 01:10:40.09,01:10:41.35 You were really out.[br]Ken sent me. 01:10:43.09,01:10:46.35 Dakota Fanning and her people,[br]they need this room. 01:10:46.35,01:10:48.00 She loves it here. 01:10:48.96,01:10:50.00 Oh. 01:10:50.83,01:10:52.09 So does that mean I have to leave the hotel? 01:10:52.09,01:10:53.14 Ken found you a room. 01:10:55.09,01:10:57.79 I'll take it, yeah.[br]I wanna hang out with Rachel a little more. 01:11:00.01,01:11:03.31 Are those sad tissues or happy tissues? 01:11:07.10,01:11:09.49 Maybe you should just give me a minute. 01:11:13.01,01:11:16.06 It was the only room available! 01:11:16.06,01:11:17.84 I'm sure it was! 01:11:21.58,01:11:24.10 - Hey, how's it going?[br]- It's all right. 01:11:24.10,01:11:25.67 Really? 01:11:25.67,01:11:29.19 I think you got some pain behind[br]those eyes. A kind of pain that only... 01:11:29.19,01:11:30.84 Okay, you know what?[br]Let's cut the bullshit. 01:11:30.84,01:11:33.15 I wanna stand up on a wave before I leave. 01:11:33.15,01:11:35.02 I don't think you're ready yet, man. 01:11:35.02,01:11:38.58 - I'm ready to ride giants, Koonu.[br]- I think you're ready. 01:12:01.11,01:12:02.46 Petey! 01:12:07.55,01:12:08.72 - Hi.[br]- Hi. 01:12:08.72,01:12:11.55 Miss Marshall, what can I do for you? 01:12:11.55,01:12:14.11 Is there a place[br]to get good sushi around here? 01:12:14.11,01:12:18.29 Yeah. Yeah, there's a really great place[br]about five minutes from here called Asuki. 01:12:18.64,01:12:20.20 Perfect. 01:12:20.20,01:12:21.86 - Do you want me to get you a map?[br]- Please. 01:12:21.86,01:12:22.99 Okay. 01:12:23.73,01:12:27.16 So, this is where we are. 01:12:27.16,01:12:31.34 Head down Kamehameha,[br]and then pass Funaho Loko Marsh. 01:12:31.34,01:12:33.34 And it should be right to the left. 01:12:33.34,01:12:35.60 It might take, like, five minutes. 01:12:35.60,01:12:37.99 - Great. Thank you.[br]- Any time. 01:12:41.77,01:12:43.21 Um... 01:12:43.21,01:12:46.86 - I saw you with Peter Bretter...[br]- Yeah. 01:12:46.86,01:12:49.60 ...who's my ex-boyfriend. 01:12:49.60,01:12:52.91 Oh, my God. I'm really sorry. 01:12:52.91,01:12:54.39 - No.[br]- It's not like that at all. 01:12:54.39,01:12:55.95 - It's not what you're...[br]- No, it's fine. 01:12:55.95,01:12:58.04 I'm just really glad[br]you're keeping him company, 'cause... 01:12:58.04,01:13:00.87 - Gosh, no.[br]... you seem like a really nice person, 01:13:00.87,01:13:03.65 - and you're very pretty.[br]- Thank you. 01:13:03.65,01:13:06.17 Gosh, you're, like, way prettier. 01:13:06.17,01:13:08.48 No, you're, like, so pretty. 01:13:10.56,01:13:11.91 Really? 01:13:12.83,01:13:16.39 - Yeah.[br]- Wow, thank you. Thank you. 01:13:16.39,01:13:18.57 And one more thing about Peter. 01:13:18.57,01:13:24.39 He's a really good guy. Really good.[br]Like, great, actually. 01:13:24.92,01:13:26.18 Yeah. 01:13:26.83,01:13:27.87 Um... 01:13:31.70,01:13:34.31 Please don't cry, Miss Marshall. 01:13:34.31,01:13:37.14 God. Do you need me to get you a tissue? 01:13:37.14,01:13:39.96 Oh, no, I'm good, I'm good.[br]I'm okay, I'm okay. 01:13:40.88,01:13:42.14 Okay. 01:13:44.14,01:13:47.97 - Thank you, Rachel.[br]- Any time, Miss Marshall. 01:13:57.88,01:14:00.06 Hey, ahoy, there! 01:14:00.06,01:14:01.84 You surf, too? 01:14:01.84,01:14:04.75 Good Lord, no.[br]I'm just drifting around, you know? 01:14:04.75,01:14:08.93 Getting in touch with the ocean and stuff.[br]It's really pleasant. 01:14:09.23,01:14:10.80 It was, yeah. 01:14:12.50,01:14:13.71 I'm gonna head in. 01:14:13.71,01:14:16.15 Before you go, actually, Peter,[br]I just wanted to tell you, 01:14:16.15,01:14:18.54 I was listening to Sarah's iPod[br]the other day, 01:14:18.54,01:14:22.50 and amidst the interminable dross[br]that's on that thing, 01:14:22.50,01:14:24.67 I found one track that I quite liked. 01:14:24.67,01:14:27.80 So I checked what it was,[br]and it was actually one of yours. 01:14:27.80,01:14:32.80 And it kind of reminded me of a dark,[br]gothic Neil Diamond. It's great. 01:14:33.98,01:14:36.24 That's, like, exactly what I'm going for. 01:14:36.24,01:14:37.81 Right, yeah. 01:14:41.59,01:14:42.94 Fuck. 01:14:44.81,01:14:46.37 Fuck, you're cool. 01:14:47.94,01:14:52.72 It's so hard to say,[br]because, like, I hate you in so many ways, 01:14:54.72,01:14:56.81 but whatever.[br]I can see why Sarah likes you. 01:14:56.81,01:15:00.33 No accounting for taste, I suppose.[br]In her case, anyway. 01:15:00.33,01:15:03.47 She was with me for five years,[br]so there you go. 01:15:03.47,01:15:06.38 Yeah, you got four on me there, mate. 01:15:09.42,01:15:11.73 You slept with Sarah a year ago? 01:15:11.73,01:15:15.86 I thought you knew![br]Peter, please, don't take it seriously. 01:15:16.08,01:15:19.21 - What the fuck, man! You've...[br]- Don't get offended by that. 01:15:19.21,01:15:21.60 You can't be so casual about this! 01:15:23.60,01:15:24.73 This isn't Europe, okay?[br]There are rules here. 01:15:24.73,01:15:28.39 I'm really sorry.[br]I apologise for offending you, Peter. 01:15:28.39,01:15:31.65 I just hope this doesn't ruin our friendship. 01:15:31.65,01:15:33.08 Well, what's that about? 01:15:33.08,01:15:34.43 What do you think it's about?[br]This is a big deal! 01:15:36.21,01:15:37.47 What about a code of the ocean?[br]That's not on. 01:15:37.47,01:15:38.61 What about codes among men? 01:15:38.61,01:15:39.87 You don't sleep[br]with another man's girlfriend! 01:15:39.87,01:15:41.13 - Think of...[br]- Get out of here! 01:15:41.13,01:15:44.26 - All right, okay! All right![br]- Get out of here! 01:16:08.66,01:16:09.57 Oh, God! 01:16:30.97,01:16:34.40 Koonu! This guy needs help! Koonu! 01:16:37.53,01:16:40.67 - Should I call the front desk?[br]- It hurts. It hurts. 01:16:40.67,01:16:43.06 Wow, you got coral right there in your leg! 01:16:43.06,01:16:44.62 Can you get it out of my leg, please,[br]hotel man? 01:16:44.62,01:16:45.75 Can you do something about that? 01:16:45.75,01:16:49.93 I'd love to, you know, but hotel policy...[br]They don't let me do that kind of thing. 01:16:50.02,01:16:52.02 They get all weirded out. Insurance... 01:16:52.02,01:16:54.02 Koonu, can you call[br]the front desk for me, please? 01:16:54.02,01:16:55.67 - Yeah.[br]- It really hurts. 01:16:55.67,01:16:58.67 Koonu, call the front desk now! 01:16:58.67,01:17:00.76 Okay, monster man. 01:17:00.76,01:17:02.67 Pete, he's not gonna do nothing. 01:17:02.67,01:17:04.63 I kind of have this thing about blood, okay? 01:17:04.63,01:17:08.50 Look at it. It's raping my leg.[br]Peter, get it out of my fucking leg, please! 01:17:08.50,01:17:10.80 One, two. 01:17:10.80,01:17:12.98 - You can't get it out.[br]- It's really in there. 01:17:12.98,01:17:15.50 - Get it out of me![br]- Three! 01:17:15.50,01:17:17.76 Fuck my arse! 01:17:17.76,01:17:20.68 Okay, I got it. It's all done. It's all over. 01:17:20.68,01:17:22.16 Everything looks fine. 01:17:25.37,01:17:28.29 It's all good! They're coming wiki wiki. 01:17:28.29,01:17:32.46 Can you get some towels for me, please?[br]I'm really losing a lot of blood. 01:17:32.68,01:17:34.77 You sound like you're from London. 01:17:34.77,01:17:36.85 Yeah, I'm from London. 01:17:42.29,01:17:44.16 What's going on? 01:17:44.16,01:17:48.34 You fainted.[br]I didn't want you to wake up by yourself. 01:17:48.34,01:17:51.86 - How's your friend? Is he all right?[br]- Yeah. 01:17:51.86,01:17:54.38 They gave him stitches,[br]and he's sleeping it off. 01:17:54.38,01:17:56.56 - Hey, you wanna hear something funny?[br]- What? 01:17:56.56,01:17:58.86 Are you ready to laugh?[br]'Cause this is a gas. 01:17:58.86,01:18:00.21 Okay. 01:18:00.21,01:18:03.78 Edward Scissorhands over there told me[br]that you two were fucking each other 01:18:03.78,01:18:06.47 for a whole God damn year[br]while we were together. 01:18:06.47,01:18:07.60 Shit. 01:18:07.60,01:18:09.39 How about that, Sarah? 01:18:09.39,01:18:11.04 I'm sorry, Peter. 01:18:12.30,01:18:15.21 Pete, you shouldn't be up[br]and walking around. Can you please... 01:18:15.21,01:18:17.95 Please don't touch me.[br]Just don't touch me, okay? 01:18:17.95,01:18:19.69 I'm not touching you. 01:18:19.69,01:18:22.00 Will you just please sit? Please? 01:18:23.04,01:18:25.87 All right, I'll sit down,[br]but I'm sitting down 'cause I want to, 01:18:25.87,01:18:30.04 not because you've asked me to sit, okay? 01:18:30.13,01:18:31.39 Great. 01:18:37.35,01:18:38.57 A year? 01:18:39.44,01:18:42.13 Listen, I get it, okay? I just... 01:18:42.13,01:18:45.13 I need to understand what I did[br]to make you cheat. I just... 01:18:45.13,01:18:51.70 Pete, it's not anything you did. 01:18:51.70,01:18:55.57 You didn't do anything.[br]I mean, you were great. 01:18:55.57,01:18:58.40 Will you please cut the bullshit[br]and have a talk with me? 01:18:58.40,01:19:01.23 Fine. Cutting the bullshit. 01:19:03.10,01:19:05.49 It got really hard to keep taking care of you[br]when you stopped taking care of yourself. 01:19:05.49,01:19:06.75 I tried to get you out of the house. 01:19:06.75,01:19:11.62 I tried to get you off your little island[br]you loved so much, the couch. 01:19:11.62,01:19:13.40 You didn't wanna see the light of day! 01:19:13.40,01:19:17.58 God, there was one week[br]when you wore sweatpants! Every day. 01:19:22.58,01:19:26.15 You shall not pass! 01:19:27.36,01:19:30.63 You know what? If they were Sean John[br]sweatpants, it would have been fine. 01:19:30.63,01:19:33.84 But because they're Costco brand,[br]it's like the worst thing I could do. 01:19:33.84,01:19:37.41 That has nothing to do with it.[br]That's what you don't get. 01:19:37.41,01:19:41.24 I'm sorry that I didn't end up being[br]who we thought I was gonna be, you know? 01:19:41.24,01:19:46.15 I tried really hard. I promise you that.[br]I just didn't have it in me. 01:19:46.15,01:19:48.67 I think if you had just, maybe tried harder. 01:19:48.67,01:19:51.07 I tried! 01:19:51.07,01:19:53.68 You have no idea how hard I tried, Peter. 01:19:53.68,01:19:55.33 I talked to a therapist. 01:19:55.33,01:19:57.72 I talked to my mother.[br]I read every book possible. 01:19:57.72,01:19:59.94 I took love seminars. I took sex seminars. 01:19:59.94,01:20:02.50 None of it worked.[br]None of it made a difference to you. 01:20:02.50,01:20:05.98 And I couldn't drown with you any more. 01:20:05.98,01:20:10.77 Don't you dare sit there[br]and tell me that I didn't try. 01:20:10.77,01:20:12.85 I did. 01:20:12.85,01:20:15.25 You were just too stupid to notice. 01:20:48.21,01:20:51.43 Whoa. I thought you were gonna wear[br]the shirt I got you. 01:20:51.43,01:20:53.21 What? No. 01:20:53.21,01:20:56.00 I mean, I do love that shirt you got me. 01:20:56.00,01:20:58.74 I admire Sir Tommy Bahama an awful lot. 01:20:58.74,01:21:02.56 He's a talented man,[br]but tonight, I feel that this is appropriate. 01:21:07.78,01:21:11.22 Wow, thank you. Yeah, Sarah got it for me. 01:21:12.61,01:21:15.83 This is, like, way more convenient[br]than my backpack. 01:21:19.18,01:21:20.39 Awesome hat! 01:21:20.39,01:21:22.48 Thank you.[br]Yeah, my girlfriend got it for me! 01:21:22.48,01:21:24.18 - I'm fucking with you![br]- Cool! 01:21:29.48,01:21:32.18 Sarah, can I use this lipstick, please? 01:21:37.18,01:21:40.14 Sure. I don't care. 01:21:42.84,01:21:44.40 I think it looks great.[br]But if you're not, let's go change. 01:21:44.40,01:21:47.92 No, I like it. I didn't like it at first.[br]Now I really think it's... 01:21:47.92,01:21:49.71 Oh, bloody hell. This is a small resort. 01:21:49.71,01:21:51.19 Hi, Peter. 01:21:53.49,01:21:55.01 Hey. Wow. 01:21:56.40,01:21:58.67 Aldous, Sarah, this is Rachel. 01:21:58.67,01:22:01.28 Sarah bought me this shirt. 01:22:01.28,01:22:02.67 I could've guessed that. Yeah. 01:22:02.67,01:22:03.89 - Looks great.[br]- You look great. 01:22:03.89,01:22:05.89 Looks awesome. 01:22:05.89,01:22:08.06 - See.[br]- Thanks. 01:22:08.06,01:22:12.24 Mr Snow, I'm so sorry.[br]I did not know you guys were coming. 01:22:12.32,01:22:13.50 You're gonna have to wait five minutes. 01:22:13.50,01:22:14.63 I did not know you guys were coming. 01:22:14.63,01:22:16.41 It's okay. It's not a problem. 01:22:16.41,01:22:18.28 I didn't see you guys, so... 01:22:18.28,01:22:20.80 There's really no need to weep. 01:22:21.50,01:22:23.06 I'm not crying. 01:22:24.54,01:22:27.46 It's no problem, honestly.[br]It's not a problem. 01:22:27.46,01:22:30.59 - So, your table is ready, guys.[br]- Oh, great. 01:22:30.59,01:22:32.24 Hey, have a lovely evening, you two. 01:22:32.24,01:22:34.15 - Thank you. Have a great dinner, you guys.[br]- Thank you. 01:22:34.15,01:22:35.59 You're welcome to join us, obviously,[br]if you want. 01:22:35.59,01:22:37.46 - Okay.[br]- Wouldn't dream of it. What? 01:22:37.46,01:22:38.63 What? 01:22:39.68,01:22:41.55 - Oh, okay.[br]- Okay. 01:22:41.55,01:22:43.33 That's great. Awesome.[br]- Sure. 01:22:43.33,01:22:44.68 Great. I'll just set two more places. 01:22:44.68,01:22:45.81 - Okay.[br]- Not a big deal. 01:22:45.81,01:22:47.29 Awesome. 01:22:47.29,01:22:51.46 So this is actually happening.[br]We're gonna let this happen. 01:22:52.07,01:22:53.12 I am so sorry. 01:22:53.12,01:22:54.16 I never thought in a million years[br]she would say yes. 01:22:56.12,01:22:57.29 I did. 01:22:57.29,01:23:00.29 What? I just accepted an invitation.[br]I didn't wanna be rude. 01:23:00.29,01:23:02.07 It's got us in a terrible situation. 01:23:02.07,01:23:04.16 Now I'm gonna have to sit with him[br]wearing this shirt all night. 01:23:04.16,01:23:06.03 You're wearing the shirt regardless. 01:23:06.03,01:23:07.82 Australia is amazing. 01:23:07.82,01:23:11.38 - I'm telling you. It is a great place to shoot.[br]- Yeah? 01:23:11.38,01:23:14.69 Rachel, you would love it.[br]You would love it. 01:23:14.69,01:23:17.51 I wanna go. I really, really wanna go there. 01:23:17.51,01:23:19.51 - Wait, so when's the movie coming out?[br]- Mmm. 01:23:20.73,01:23:22.73 It came out. 01:23:22.73,01:23:24.60 - It was already released.[br]- Oh. 01:23:27.30,01:23:29.30 Well, you know, it's an island. 01:23:29.30,01:23:30.43 It's isolated. 01:23:30.43,01:23:31.91 - Yeah.[br]- Movies don't really come out here. 01:23:31.91,01:23:34.61 - Obviously.[br]- Did you like it? 01:23:34.61,01:23:36.17 - The movie?[br]- Yeah. 01:23:37.22,01:23:39.52 - It was...[br]- Awful bloody film. 01:23:39.52,01:23:41.69 I say, it's just a ridiculous premise. 01:23:41.69,01:23:45.35 What would happen[br]if your mobile phone killed you? 01:23:50.65,01:23:52.35 I told her that when she read the script. 01:23:52.35,01:23:54.00 Yeah. You were the voice of reason, mate. 01:23:54.00,01:23:55.79 I tried to be, but she didn't listen. 01:23:55.79,01:23:58.61 Going around killing people.[br]A mobile phone, like, doing murders. 01:23:58.61,01:24:00.57 Why couldn't you just take the battery[br]out of the phone? 01:24:00.57,01:24:02.05 Right. That's it. The battle's over. 01:24:02.05,01:24:04.44 - Yeah, we've won.[br]I hated it. 01:24:04.44,01:24:06.53 Well, it's not for everyone, but it... 01:24:06.53,01:24:08.61 No, it's ridiculous. Here's my favourite scene. 01:24:08.61,01:24:10.27 Ring-ring. Hello? 01:24:11.09,01:24:13.01 Right. It would never happen.[br]- Yeah. 01:24:13.01,01:24:14.44 No, it could never happen. 01:24:14.44,01:24:18.62 It's a metaphor for addiction to technology. 01:24:18.62,01:24:22.79 For society,[br]for how we're reliant on technology. 01:24:22.79,01:24:23.92 I get it. I'm with you. 01:24:23.92,01:24:25.27 It's a metaphor for a crap movie. 01:24:25.62,01:24:27.79 Well, it was the right choice[br]for me at the time. 01:24:27.79,01:24:29.45 Sure.[br]- You know? 01:24:41.97,01:24:43.23 Well, this is awkward. 01:24:47.49,01:24:48.54 Yeah? 01:24:49.28,01:24:51.76 - It's a bit more awkward now.[br]A little. 01:24:51.76,01:24:54.80 Hey, excuse me.[br]Can we get another bottle of wine, please? 01:24:54.80,01:24:56.06 - Sure.[br]- Thank you. 01:24:56.06,01:24:57.19 Mr Snow? 01:24:57.19,01:24:59.58 Can I get cranberry juice[br]with a bit of lime in it, please. 01:24:59.58,01:25:01.28 Do you want cranberry juice[br]or cranberry cocktail? 01:25:01.28,01:25:03.89 Because I can probably rustle up either one.[br]Throw some OJ... 01:25:03.89,01:25:05.94 I don't care. 01:25:05.94,01:25:07.41 Okay, great. 01:25:16.81,01:25:19.20 Hey, can we get another bottle of wine? 01:25:28.68,01:25:30.77 If I've learned anything from addiction,[br]it's that, 01:25:30.77,01:25:35.38 you know, life is as brief[br]as the twinkling of a star over all too soon. 01:25:35.38,01:25:37.25 So if you're in a situation[br]where you're with a woman, 01:25:39.64,01:25:40.90 why not do the most interesting thing[br]that you can do in that situation? 01:25:40.90,01:25:43.38 And by which, I don't mean[br]have a conversation, 01:25:43.38,01:25:44.95 have a chin-wag, a bit of a chat. 01:25:44.95,01:25:48.38 Lose yourself in something[br]that's both ancient and perennial. 01:25:48.38,01:25:52.56 Find something eternal, perpetual.[br]Lose yourself in fuck. 01:25:54.64,01:25:56.95 I'm going to disagree. 01:25:56.95,01:25:58.38 Respectfully, of course, sir. 01:25:58.38,01:26:00.60 Maybe for you, that works. 01:26:00.60,01:26:03.82 For me, it's much more enjoyable[br]to get to know somebody. 01:26:03.82,01:26:05.52 If you end up sleeping with them,[br]that's great. 01:26:05.52,01:26:07.69 But I like getting to know somebody. 01:26:07.69,01:26:08.74 But he... 01:26:09.26,01:26:13.30 What he's saying is that[br]he's gonna stick it wherever he wants, 01:26:13.30,01:26:15.91 but he's joking. 01:26:15.91,01:26:17.69 I ain't. No, I'm not joking. 01:26:17.69,01:26:20.09 It's just what I believe, really. 01:26:21.43,01:26:23.00 So... 01:26:23.00,01:26:28.74 Just so we're clear and so I can hone in[br]on your central thesis of the night, 01:26:28.74,01:26:30.31 wade through all the bullshit, 01:26:30.31,01:26:33.13 you're telling me[br]that you think you have the right 01:26:33.13,01:26:35.83 to just fuck anyone, anywhere, anytime? 01:26:35.83,01:26:37.83 - Yes. There it is. That's right.[br]- That's what you're saying? 01:26:37.83,01:26:40.96 Not so eloquently[br]as you just put it, sweetheart. 01:26:40.96,01:26:42.40 But ultimately, yes, that is... 01:26:42.40,01:26:44.48 Oh, no! Not the shirt! 01:26:44.48,01:26:47.53 Take my eyes, but not the shirt. Mmm. 01:26:48.05,01:26:51.05 Yeah, that's pretty much[br]what I believe, Sarah. 01:26:51.05,01:26:53.66 When you're done making jokes,[br]are you gonna get a napkin? 01:26:53.66,01:26:56.18 Do you know what? I think I've improved it,[br]actually, against all odds. 01:26:56.18,01:26:57.53 I think I deserve a design award. 01:26:57.53,01:26:59.62 Please get some seltzer water. 01:26:59.62,01:27:02.01 - Gar�on, could we get some...[br]- I saw it from farther away. 01:27:03.88,01:27:05.97 - Okay.[br]- Just lean back for a second. 01:27:05.97,01:27:07.75 No, it's all right. It's not there. Let me... 01:27:07.75,01:27:09.19 You're very diligent. I appreciate it. 01:27:09.19,01:27:11.19 Let go of the glass now.[br]You're gonna have to walk away. 01:27:11.19,01:27:12.84 Bless you. There you are. 01:27:13.19,01:27:14.93 Oh, me, oh, my. 01:27:15.88,01:27:18.06 - Call the doctor.[br]- Oh, good. 01:27:27.15,01:27:29.32 - I love Hawaii.[br]- Is it good? 01:27:29.32,01:27:33.50 Yeah, it's nice,[br]but I think for like a week tops. 01:27:33.50,01:27:35.37 Any more than that, I know I'd go crazy, 01:27:35.37,01:27:39.24 because I think that[br]Hawaii is a place to escape 01:27:39.24,01:27:42.15 for people who can't deal[br]with the real world. 01:27:44.46,01:27:49.55 Yeah, you know, there's so few[br]personal shoppers and pet therapists. 01:27:49.55,01:27:51.76 Gosh, it's such a hard life. 01:28:02.07,01:28:03.72 I like living here. 01:28:06.25,01:28:09.16 - Anyone need any more vino?[br]- I think we're good. 01:28:11.25,01:28:13.12 I've a question for you real quick, Mr S. 01:28:13.12,01:28:16.47 I was actually meaning to ask you,[br]what did you exactly think of my demo? 01:28:16.47,01:28:18.94 Did you get it? Did you get it? 01:28:18.94,01:28:21.77 Oh, no. I was gonna listen to that, 01:28:21.77,01:28:24.90 but then I just carried on living my life. 01:28:27.82,01:28:29.16 Not at all? 01:28:29.16,01:28:33.17 No, I didn't, because, you know,[br]I go on my instincts, 01:28:33.17,01:28:34.82 and they weren't good. 01:28:36.47,01:28:40.43 You know what, dude?[br]Fuck you, okay? You can go fuck yourself. 01:28:40.43,01:28:42.43 I can't yell right now because I'll get fired. 01:28:42.43,01:28:43.56 My boss will hear me, 01:28:43.56,01:28:45.56 and then I won't be able[br]to pay off my student loans. 01:28:45.56,01:28:48.47 But you know what? You're an asshole.[br]I fucking hate you. 01:28:48.47,01:28:49.61 I bought all your records. 01:28:49.61,01:28:52.43 This whole fucking time, I've been trying[br]to get you to come hang out with me. 01:28:52.43,01:28:56.61 I'm gonna have people fuck with your food[br]the rest of your trip, you fucking dick! 01:28:56.82,01:28:59.22 I like him. That was quite moving. 01:29:14.66,01:29:16.00 Wait, wait, wait. 01:29:16.00,01:29:17.79 Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. 01:29:18.83,01:29:21.09 Are you sure that you're not,[br]like, too drunk? 01:29:21.09,01:29:23.83 Jesus, would you stop being so sensitive. 01:29:50.10,01:29:51.14 Aldous. 01:29:52.71,01:29:54.14 Wake up. 01:29:54.14,01:29:56.88 - Aldous. Wake up.[br]- Hmm... 01:29:56.88,01:29:58.45 Make love to me. 01:30:00.84,01:30:02.71 All right. You go on top, though,[br]'cause I'm knackered. 01:30:18.98,01:30:20.11 Listen. 01:30:22.54,01:30:24.28 Yes! Yes! 01:30:27.11,01:30:29.20 - Yeah.[br]Yes! 01:30:29.20,01:30:30.76 - Oh, yes![br]- Yeah! 01:30:33.81,01:30:35.85 - Yeah! Oh, God![br]- Yeah! 01:30:40.03,01:30:41.59 - Right there![br]- Yes! 01:30:41.59,01:30:44.11 - Yes![br]- Yes! She's having an orgasm! 01:30:44.11,01:30:46.07 This is the best sex ever! 01:30:46.07,01:30:47.99 Yeah, all right, that'll do. 01:30:48.59,01:30:49.86 What? 01:30:50.99,01:30:52.86 I made a mistake coming here with you. 01:30:56.64,01:30:58.73 And I'm not done either! 01:30:59.86,01:31:01.95 - Please shut up! Okay.[br]- Okay! 01:31:01.95,01:31:04.25 You're still involved with him next door,[br]ain't you? 01:31:04.25,01:31:05.38 Excuse me? 01:31:05.38,01:31:07.25 You should've seen yourself[br]at dinner, Sarah. 01:31:07.25,01:31:11.43 Then we come back here,[br]and you put on that ghastly performance. 01:31:11.73,01:31:14.78 I mean, I've heard that[br]women do fake orgasms, 01:31:14.78,01:31:16.34 but I've never seen one. 01:31:16.34,01:31:18.12 It really deeply upset me. 01:31:18.12,01:31:19.47 You should have seen yourself at dinner. 01:31:21.21,01:31:25.39 "Oh, I'm Aldous[br]Snow. Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit, bullshit. 01:31:25.52,01:31:27.61 "No, no drinks for me, thanks. 01:31:27.61,01:31:29.26 "Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit. " 01:31:29.26,01:31:31.95 That's a really reductive impression. 01:31:31.95,01:31:34.48 If I wanted to see you act badly,[br]I'd just watch your TV show, 01:31:34.48,01:31:36.78 which, obviously, I can't now,[br]because it's been cancelled. 01:31:36.78,01:31:38.87 Oh, my God, you're such a prick. 01:31:38.87,01:31:40.00 And you know what? 01:31:40.00,01:31:43.13 Let me tell you something[br]about these tattoos, okay? 01:31:43.13,01:31:47.31 That is Buddhist. That is Nordic.[br]That is Hindu. That's just gibberish. 01:31:47.39,01:31:49.61 They are completely conflicting ideologies. 01:31:49.61,01:31:52.00 And that does not make you[br]a citizen of the world. 01:31:52.00,01:31:53.87 It makes you full of shit. 01:31:57.40,01:32:00.01 Was that genuine or did you fake that? 01:32:02.01,01:32:06.18 Right. I'm gonna probably clear off now. 01:32:06.27,01:32:07.83 I'll have a little sleep for a few hours, 01:32:07.83,01:32:11.70 then I'm gonna probably go[br]in the morning, okay? 01:32:16.49,01:32:18.71 I hate your music. 01:32:18.71,01:32:22.01 Yeah, well,[br]I fucked the housekeeper the other day. 01:32:28.36,01:32:30.06 Are you sleeping? 01:32:30.88,01:32:32.36 Not any more. 01:32:37.89,01:32:42.06 I know that I'm leaving in a couple of days,[br]so I don't even know 01:32:44.02,01:32:46.02 what the hell this means, 01:32:49.54,01:32:52.45 but I really like spending time with you a lot. 01:32:55.89,01:32:57.59 I know. Me too. 01:33:06.46,01:33:07.37 Hey. 01:33:13.63,01:33:15.11 Good morning. 01:33:17.90,01:33:19.37 Where are you going? 01:33:19.37,01:33:22.81 The Korean Textile Manufacturer's Luau. 01:33:22.81,01:33:25.20 - Just kill me.[br]- Fun. 01:33:25.20,01:33:26.25 Joy. 01:33:28.12,01:33:31.77 I want you to know[br]that I meant what I said last night. 01:33:33.12,01:33:34.60 I know you did. 01:33:35.86,01:33:37.42 I did, too. 01:33:39.90,01:33:42.64 - Can I see you again tonight?[br]- Yeah. 01:33:43.77,01:33:45.64 - I get off at 7:00.[br]- Yay. 01:33:46.47,01:33:47.64 Bye. 01:33:50.64,01:33:51.99 Sir, morning mai tai. 01:33:51.99,01:33:53.99 You know what? 01:33:53.99,01:33:57.95 I actually will not be having[br]an alcoholic beverage this morning. 01:34:25.48,01:34:27.48 Jump! Jump! Jump![br]- Don't make me do it. 01:34:47.05,01:34:49.05 Hey. Morning, mate. 01:34:49.88,01:34:53.62 - How are you today?[br]- Yeah, I'm good. I'm good. You okay? 01:34:53.62,01:34:55.84 Am I okay? I'm better than okay, my friend. 01:34:55.84,01:34:57.49 You seem sprightly. 01:34:57.49,01:34:58.75 I... 01:34:59.36,01:35:01.05 I had a great time last night. 01:35:01.05,01:35:04.49 - Congratulations. Well done. Well done.[br]- Thank you. 01:35:04.49,01:35:06.36 What about you? What's with the bag? 01:35:06.36,01:35:09.80 Right, yeah. I'm off back to England, mate. 01:35:09.80,01:35:11.28 Oh, you and Sarah are going to England. 01:35:11.28,01:35:13.67 No, no, no. I'm just going alone. 01:35:14.49,01:35:16.45 - Yeah.[br]- Did you guys have a fight or something? 01:35:16.45,01:35:20.10 Yeah, it was really... How you served[br]five years under her, I don't know. 01:35:20.10,01:35:24.80 You deserve a medal or a holiday[br]or at least a cuddle from somebody. 01:35:24.80,01:35:26.58 You were only here for a week. 01:35:26.58,01:35:28.76 Well, I don't know.[br]For me, that one week of it 01:35:28.76,01:35:33.46 was like going on holiday with,[br]I don't know, I wouldn't say Hitler, 01:35:33.46,01:35:36.89 but certainly Goebbels.[br]It was like a little holiday with Hitler. 01:35:36.89,01:35:38.37 Jesus. 01:35:38.37,01:35:41.89 Hey, listen, at least it's clear now[br]for you two to reconnect. 01:35:41.89,01:35:43.15 Oh... 01:35:44.42,01:35:46.72 No, no. No. 01:35:46.72,01:35:49.11 You know what?[br]I have a good thing going on with Rachel, 01:35:49.11,01:35:50.89 and I want to see that through. 01:35:50.89,01:35:54.42 Well, maybe you could have both of them.[br]Rachel and Sarah. 01:35:54.42,01:35:57.33 They got on all right, didn't they, at dinner?[br]So maybe... 01:35:57.33,01:35:59.85 You know what?[br]First of all, I'm not that kind of guy. 01:35:59.85,01:36:04.64 And even if I was, I don't think that I have[br]the sexual competency to really pull that off. 01:36:04.64,01:36:06.29 Yeah. It's a gift. 01:36:06.29,01:36:09.55 I will say,[br]if you do get back with Miss Marshall, 01:36:09.55,01:36:11.86 handle with care, because, you know... 01:36:14.03,01:36:15.81 Okay. Well, I think my ride's here. 01:36:15.81,01:36:18.60 So I'm gonna skedaddle then[br]before anything else happens to me. 01:36:18.60,01:36:20.29 Before life gets any more daft. 01:36:20.29,01:36:21.95 Is someone gonna take that? 01:36:21.95,01:36:24.56 Listen, don't let them grind you down. 01:36:25.82,01:36:27.17 Take it easy. 01:36:27.17,01:36:29.77 Hey, look at my driver.[br]I'm gonna have sex with her. 01:36:34.34,01:36:36.95 He said it was clear I wasn't over you. 01:36:39.56,01:36:41.43 And then he left. 01:36:41.43,01:36:42.91 Fucking prick. 01:36:44.91,01:36:48.22 And then I started thinking,[br]what if he's right? 01:36:48.22,01:36:51.13 What if I'm not over you? 01:36:53.04,01:36:55.96 - Sarah...[br]- Please just let me finish, Pete. 01:37:02.91,01:37:06.18 What if I made[br]a really, really horrible mistake? 01:37:09.09,01:37:13.27 - Sarah.[br]- Yeah? 01:37:13.35,01:37:15.87 Stop pulling my face towards your face. 01:37:15.87,01:37:17.75 Why? 01:37:17.75,01:37:19.40 You don't like it? 01:37:19.40,01:37:24.09 Listen, pulling my shirt towards you[br]is the same concept as pulling my face. 01:37:24.09,01:37:28.27 Let's spend one more night here together,[br]and then let's go home and then... 01:37:28.36,01:37:30.36 And we'll just pretend[br]like it never happened. 01:37:30.36,01:37:32.53 ...face reality. No.[br]- That's the big plan? 01:37:32.53,01:37:34.32 No. I love you. 01:37:34.32,01:37:37.45 That's not fair.[br]That's not fair of you to say that to me. 01:37:39.45,01:37:40.88 Please, Peter. 01:37:43.80,01:37:46.32 - Tell me you're sorry.[br]- I'm so sorry. 01:37:49.67,01:37:51.19 I missed you. 01:37:56.54,01:37:57.58 I'm sorry. 01:38:00.58,01:38:02.58 God, I missed you, Peter. 01:38:09.89,01:38:10.80 All right. 01:38:11.54,01:38:14.98 Get hard for me, Pete. Get hard for me. 01:38:14.98,01:38:17.80 - I know what I'm supposed to do.[br]- Okay. 01:38:17.80,01:38:19.76 Just do it. Come on. Get hard. 01:38:19.76,01:38:21.55 - I'm trying.[br]- Okay. 01:38:21.55,01:38:23.41 - Here. Just let me do it for a second.[br]- Okay. 01:38:25.63,01:38:28.85 I really want you, Peter. I missed you. 01:38:28.85,01:38:30.33 You don't want help? 01:38:30.33,01:38:33.77 - You don't want help? Uh-huh.[br]- Can you be quiet just for a minute? 01:38:33.77,01:38:34.90 Do you want my hands? 01:38:34.90,01:38:38.12 Maybe just don't talk for a second[br]is what I mean. 01:38:39.29,01:38:40.85 Do you want my mouth? 01:38:40.85,01:38:43.33 - Yeah, maybe your mouth.[br]- Yeah. Okay. 01:38:51.90,01:38:54.51 What's the problem, Peter? 01:38:54.51,01:38:56.68 - I don't know...[br]- More? 01:38:56.68,01:38:58.99 You can keep trying if you want. 01:39:03.47,01:39:05.56 What's wrong with you? 01:39:05.56,01:39:07.73 - Nothing is wrong with me, okay?[br]- Okay. 01:39:07.73,01:39:09.82 - No, I didn't...[br]- Just, something doesn't feel right any more. 01:39:09.82,01:39:11.82 Okay. Well, did you... You know what? 01:39:11.82,01:39:13.99 Did you drink today?[br]Because sometimes when you drink... 01:39:13.99,01:39:15.56 Excuse me. 01:39:15.56,01:39:18.39 No, I haven't had anything to drink today. 01:39:20.78,01:39:25.48 Maybe the problem is that[br]you broke my heart into a million pieces, 01:39:25.48,01:39:29.22 and so my cock doesn't want[br]to be around you any more, okay? 01:39:29.22,01:39:30.26 Ever! 01:39:32.35,01:39:34.96 Because you know what I just realised?[br]Huh? 01:39:34.96,01:39:37.78 You're the God damn devil. Okay? 01:39:42.48,01:39:45.39 Wedding in Hawaii! Real original! 01:39:56.35,01:39:58.53 - Hey.[br]- Hey, Rachel. 01:40:00.01,01:40:03.09 - Sarah and Aldous broke up this morning.[br]- What a surprise. 01:40:03.09,01:40:05.83 So I went to check on Sarah, and... 01:40:08.66,01:40:11.14 Listen, I'm here[br]because I don't want to lie to you, okay? 01:40:11.14,01:40:13.14 Some stuff happened. 01:40:13.14,01:40:15.10 I'm really, really sorry that it did, 01:40:15.10,01:40:18.14 but I'm also really glad that it did, because 01:40:18.14,01:40:22.71 I'm able to see so clearly now[br]that Sarah and I are not right for each other. 01:40:23.97,01:40:25.45 What stuff? 01:40:27.62,01:40:33.36 I went up to make sure that she was okay,[br]and it got weird. 01:40:33.36,01:40:35.23 But now everything is fine. 01:40:35.23,01:40:36.89 And I need you to understand 01:40:36.89,01:40:39.19 that I meant everything that I said[br]to you this morning. 01:40:39.19,01:40:40.45 What exactly happened, Peter? 01:40:40.45,01:40:42.11 We fooled around a little bit. 01:40:42.11,01:40:45.32 Shut the fuck up,[br]and tell me exactly what you did. 01:40:47.02,01:40:53.07 All right. I went to her room,[br]and she was crying and crying and crying. 01:40:53.07,01:40:55.24 And I felt like I should comfort her. 01:40:55.24,01:40:58.67 And then she started kissing me[br]because I was comforting her. 01:40:58.67,01:41:00.89 And then the next thing I knew,[br]I was kissing her 01:41:00.89,01:41:03.07 because she had been kissing me[br]because of the comforting. 01:41:03.07,01:41:06.94 Then she started taking my clothes off,[br]and then her clothes were off. 01:41:10.07,01:41:13.90 Then she performed[br]10 to 15 seconds of oral sex on me. 01:41:13.90,01:41:15.46 Okay. Peter, you can leave now. 01:41:15.46,01:41:18.20 - At the most. Maximum.[br]- Thank you for staying at Turtle Bay. 01:41:18.20,01:41:19.42 Rachel, please don't do this. 01:41:19.42,01:41:21.94 The only reason I'm telling you this[br]is because I really care about... 01:41:21.94,01:41:24.03 Listen to me, Peter. 01:41:24.03,01:41:27.16 I was a mess, too. I understand. Okay? 01:41:27.16,01:41:30.51 But it does not excuse[br]you acting like a complete asshole. 01:41:30.51,01:41:33.29 Listen, I know that[br]I fucked things up for a minute, 01:41:33.29,01:41:34.99 but I'm not like every other asshole. 01:41:34.99,01:41:38.64 You should not be with anybody right now. 01:41:38.64,01:41:39.86 Anybody. 01:41:41.77,01:41:43.73 I know... 01:41:43.73,01:41:45.38 I know that there is something here. 01:41:45.38,01:41:47.38 I know that I was not wrong about that. 01:41:47.38,01:41:51.26 And, yes, it's only been four days,[br]but I know you feel it, too. 01:41:55.95,01:41:57.69 I need you to leave. 01:41:59.78,01:42:03.65 Do not write me. Do not call me.[br]Do not e-mail me. 01:42:09.48,01:42:11.56 Peter, I need you to go. 01:42:16.04,01:42:18.04 I won't bother you any more. 01:42:19.18,01:42:20.44 I'm sorry. 01:42:27.96,01:42:29.83 I don't know what to do. 01:42:37.83,01:42:39.92 Hey, brother, what you doing, huh?[br]You stealing my art? 01:42:39.92,01:42:42.44 I want you to put it back right now.[br]Put it back, bro! 01:42:42.44,01:42:45.05 Listen, give me the picture. 01:42:45.05,01:42:47.44 Doo-doo paper.[br]You're throwing doo-doo paper? 01:42:47.44,01:42:49.10 Give me the picture. 01:42:51.92,01:42:55.27 Don't be stupid, brother.[br]Just give me the picture. 01:42:55.27,01:42:58.19 You can hit me as many times as you want.[br]I'm not giving you the photo back. 01:42:58.19,01:42:59.23 Oh, yeah. 01:43:06.01,01:43:09.54 No, no, no.[br]Peter, I told you I did not want to see you. 01:43:28.93,01:43:32.80 Aloha, I'm Sarah Marshall[br]from Crime Scene: Scene of the Crime. 01:43:32.80,01:43:34.46 And when I'm not scrubbing for evidence, 01:43:34.46,01:43:38.11 I'm flying Hawaiian Airlines[br]to my favourite destinations. 01:43:38.11,01:43:40.63 Now sit back[br]and enjoy your in-flight entertainment. 01:43:40.63,01:43:42.50 I know I will. Mahalo. 01:43:43.11,01:43:46.46 Everybody hates you 01:43:46.46,01:43:50.03 Everybody wishes that you were dead 01:43:50.03,01:43:51.68 Because, Peter, you suck 01:43:51.68,01:43:53.68 Peter, you suck 01:43:53.68,01:43:56.99 Peter, your music is fucking terrible 01:43:56.99,01:44:00.33 Peter, you suck 01:44:00.33,01:44:03.68 Peter, you don't do anything of value 01:44:03.68,01:44:05.25 Peter, you suck 01:44:05.25,01:44:09.42 Write some music but instead[br]you sit and write these bullshit songs 01:44:09.73,01:44:11.51 It's so self-loathing 01:44:11.51,01:44:14.82 Go see a psychiatrist[br]I hate the psychiatrist 01:44:14.82,01:44:16.38 Well, go see one anyway 01:44:16.38,01:44:17.86 I don't like the psychiatrist 01:44:17.86,01:44:19.51 You need to go and see one 01:44:19.51,01:44:21.08 See a psychiatrist 01:44:21.08,01:44:22.56 I'm not going 01:44:58.31,01:45:03.74 It's getting kind of hard to believe[br]things are going to get better 01:45:50.76,01:45:52.41 I don't understand[br]what there is to think about. 01:45:52.41,01:45:53.67 Because, D, he... 01:45:53.67,01:45:56.28 She licked the tip. That doesn't count. 01:45:56.28,01:45:59.11 - Of course it counts. He...[br]- He what? 01:45:59.11,01:46:02.76 He refused a blowjob[br]from his ex-girlfriend mid-blowjob. 01:46:02.76,01:46:05.76 Do you know what that's like for a man?[br]It's called blue balls, Rachel. 01:46:05.76,01:46:07.98 This guy is like Gandhi, but better. 01:46:07.98,01:46:09.11 He likes puppets. 01:46:09.11,01:46:10.06 I love puppets. 01:46:11.81,01:46:14.72 I love Fraggle Rock. I love Lamb Chop.[br]I love Elmo. 01:46:14.72,01:46:18.20 Sesame Street, Bert and Ernie,[br]Snuffelupagus. Fucks my shit up. 01:46:22.46,01:46:26.11 This is a song that[br]I never thought I would write 01:46:26.11,01:46:28.29 On the night I'm dying 01:46:28.29,01:46:31.42 Sorry for all the wrong I've done 01:46:31.42,01:46:33.29 I'm finished trying 01:46:33.29,01:46:38.51 It was a wonderful dream[br]Now let him come and slay me 01:46:38.51,01:46:40.16 There he is 01:46:40.16,01:46:42.90 The demon[br]who haunted the streets of London 01:46:42.90,01:46:44.55 I've come to slay you 01:46:44.55,01:46:46.25 Here I am! 01:46:46.25,01:46:48.73 I'll leave you bleeding in my dungeon 01:46:48.73,01:46:52.60 I'll never obey you[br]I'll rip out your oesophagus 01:46:52.60,01:46:57.47 Please, Mr Van Helsing[br]Listen to me 01:46:57.47,01:47:03.04 He is just a man who wishes to be free 01:47:03.04,01:47:06.25 Lay him in a hearse[br]You must end this curse 01:47:06.25,01:47:07.91 He is the worst! 01:47:20.65,01:47:23.96 Don't go my love 01:47:23.96,01:47:28.04 I can't say goodbye 01:47:28.04,01:47:31.91 My reign is done 01:47:31.91,01:47:37.13 It's time to die 01:47:38.05,01:47:39.83 I'm pregnant 01:47:39.83,01:47:41.61 Dracula 01:47:41.61,01:47:42.83 VAN HELSING: What have I done? 01:47:42.83,01:47:45.13 Has flown above 01:47:45.13,01:47:46.48 Who killed Dracula? 01:47:46.48,01:47:50.05 But he found a taste 01:47:50.05,01:47:53.05 A taste for love 01:47:53.05,01:47:55.79 My life is a lie 01:47:55.79,01:48:01.53 Sweet Dracula[br]I miss my young dead prince 01:48:01.53,01:48:05.71 I'll never see him again 01:48:05.79,01:48:08.27 Until my death 01:48:08.27,01:48:11.62 What a wonderful dream 01:48:11.62,01:48:17.27 To find a taste for love 01:48:17.27,01:48:23.62 A taste for love 01:48:52.50,01:48:56.46 Wow. You came.[br]I can't believe that you came. 01:48:57.63,01:48:59.59 Peter, this is great. 01:48:59.59,01:49:02.81 - It was really funny. Yeah.[br]- Thank you. 01:49:02.81,01:49:04.50 You know what?[br]I didn't realise that it was a comedy, 01:49:04.50,01:49:09.07 and then someone told me that,[br]and it just, like, opened the whole thing up. 01:49:11.16,01:49:14.59 - How long are you in town for?[br]- Open-ended. 01:49:14.59,01:49:15.77 - Bold.[br]- Yeah. 01:49:15.77,01:49:16.81 Yeah, you know, I'm kind of[br]checking out some schools. 01:49:19.81,01:49:22.42 - Congratulations.[br]- Yeah, maybe. 01:49:25.64,01:49:27.34 You never called. 01:49:28.60,01:49:31.90 You told me not to. And I listened. 01:49:33.08,01:49:35.34 - Right.[br]- Wasn't easy. 01:49:35.34,01:49:37.86 I might have called once and hung up. 01:49:37.86,01:49:40.38 - No. No.[br]- From a private number. 01:49:41.21,01:49:42.25 No. 01:49:43.08,01:49:44.21 Maybe. 01:49:44.21,01:49:46.60 Peter![br]Nice job, Bretter. 01:49:46.60,01:49:47.86 Well, you should probably go back. 01:49:47.86,01:49:50.08 Would you like to hang out[br]while you're here? 01:49:50.08,01:49:52.56 - Maybe we could go to dinner or...[br]- Yeah. 01:49:52.56,01:49:54.95 - Still have my number?[br]- Yeah. Yeah, I'll call you. 01:49:54.95,01:49:57.69 - Go.[br]- Yeah, I should do that. 01:49:57.69,01:49:59.56 Yeah, yeah. Go mingle. 01:50:03.74,01:50:04.96 Hey, Peter![br]Hey, Bretter! 01:50:04.96,01:50:06.74 Come over here and meet my mom! 01:50:06.74,01:50:09.44 - Go, go.[br]- Off I go. 01:50:09.44,01:50:11.22 - Hey, Peter.[br]- Nice job, Bretter. 01:50:11.22,01:50:13.22 The play was sick, man. Good work. 01:50:13.22,01:50:15.52 - Nice job.[br]- Good job, man. That was awesome. 01:50:15.52,01:50:16.65 So cool! 01:50:16.65,01:50:18.74 Peter, congratulations. 01:50:18.74,01:50:22.26 I just wanted to say thank you.[br]I had such a great time tonight. 01:50:22.26,01:50:24.79 Oh, good. You know what?[br]I'm gonna change out of this unitard, 01:50:24.79,01:50:26.66 - 'cause I'm getting a chafe. Okay.[br]- Enough said. 01:50:26.66,01:50:28.75 - Congratulations.[br]- Thank you. 01:50:54.71,01:50:55.84 Hey, Peter? 01:50:59.19,01:51:02.62 I was just calling you. 01:51:07.97,01:51:10.15 - Wow.[br]- Oh, Peter. 01:51:10.97,01:51:13.89 - I'm sorry.[br]- Stop laughing. 01:51:15.06,01:51:17.24 Can you please stop laughing? 01:51:19.41,01:51:20.89 I missed you. 01:51:21.93,01:51:23.06 I just... 01:51:23.06,01:51:27.67 You know, I actually wanted to tell you[br]that I've been thinking so much about... 01:52:18.25,01:52:22.30 NARRATOR: This fall, Sarah Marshall is back[br]in a brand-new role. 01:52:22.30,01:52:26.17 Your wife had no enemies[br]that you're aware of. 01:52:26.17,01:52:28.86 Get ready for the most daring show[br]on television. 01:52:28.86,01:52:32.30 - Just came home, and she was lying there.[br]- Right. 01:52:32.30,01:52:35.56 In a world[br]where you don't know who to trust. 01:52:39.09,01:52:42.00 Charlie, who's Franco Marconi? 01:52:42.00,01:52:45.22 - No. No.[br]- Gun, gun, gun, gun. Drop it, drop it. 01:52:45.22,01:52:47.44 Go with your animal instincts. 01:52:51.61,01:52:54.91 - How did you know?[br]- She's an animal psychic. 01:52:55.96,01:52:59.22 Sarah Marshall returns on Animal Instincts. 01:53:00.05,01:53:01.40 Life's a bitch. 01:53:01.40,01:53:03.05 And where you're going,[br]that's exactly what you'll be. 125533