Original subtitles

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving!

What are all these cars?

Oh, just a few strays. We didn't have anywhere to go.

It's not that many people.

That's Lila and her girlfriend, Zadie, and Derek and Eric, Rita from my shop,

right? Jim, Megan, Aaron.

I think that's Tom and Tommy. OK, honey, take this in. We're going to be here

for a while. No, it's not that many people.

And that one's Ginny.

She's pretty much all packed up.

Oh. How you doing with that?

Good. It was good to have him here, but, you know, it's time. I've got to get my

house back to myself. Where's Jack?

Oh, he's driving up separately.

Yeah, he's doing one of his last long runs before next week, and I didn't feel

like waiting for him.

Hmm. We've been trying to let each other do our own thing more lately.

We're free -balling it.

Okay. Sounds gross.

Whose car is that?

I don't know. It's just a Whittle.

Who do I know that's Whittle?

Happy Thanksgiving.

Do you borrow that car from Polly Pocket?

Guys, careful where you park that thing because the baby might choke on it.

But for real, if we drip water on it, will it get bigger?

Fuck y 'all.

You must be Zadie.

Hi.

Hi.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Good to see you.

Red or white? Talk to the boss.

Right, please.

You got so big.

Hi, Happy Thanksgiving.

Oh, you got big, too.

Wonderful.

I'll drink this and my mood will change as follows.

Quiet rage.

Mostly rude.

Flirty. Still rude.

And finally, a return to me being adorable.

Let the journey begin.

I wanted a 2020 car.

But then he hates it. You know why? Because he cannot drive stick.

Because I live in the present. I also don't take steam trains or listen to the

phonograph while I jog.

Anyway, the reason why we wanted that car is because we've been talking about

our next chapter and... What?

Happy Thanksgiving, everybody.

Hey. Hey.

So many people. Hey, Joe.

Hi. Well, congratulations on becoming a state trooper, by the way.

Talk to me about the look.

Don't worry. I brought a sweater for dinner.

I do not care. Have you heard they've been free -balling? Mm -hmm. Yeah. Put

that in immediately.

We hacked marriage.

You know, she lets me look like this, and I don't say anything when she wears

her big mama underwear.

Yeah. And we don't have endless arguments about what's for dinner

have Triscuits and Cottage Cheese, and he can order a meatball sub from that

place where I saw a rat once.

Chuck, is it your marathon next week? Yes, Team Nick.

You know, I've been thinking about him a lot this week.

Oh, yeah.

He used to love Thanksgiving. Remember he spent a fortune on that stupid turkey

sword thing?

It was an old English carving blade, and I have it right here.

No way!

We're doing all his old traditions because that's what he would have

know, just the people he loved the most together.

Terry, alert. Terry approaching.

Terry is here, everybody.

Terry is here.

Everybody, Terry, make yourself at home.

All right, then. Pants coming off.

Whoops.

Whoops.

Ramona, this is my hot tub crew.

Hi. Happy Thanksgiving.

Happy Thanksgiving.

This is Ramona. She makes handcrafted looms. Oh, okay.

So you're a weaver?

No, I make looms.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Talk to the boss.

It was a long ride in an uncomfortable car.

My hat got smushed.

Okay, but is it just about the car?

Why didn't you let me tell them about our plans?

Are you changing your mind?

No, it just wasn't the right moment.

I'll tell them.

Okay.

I miss him.

I can't do this without my haberdashery tools.

Why did Anne invite all these randos?

They didn't get a big enough turkey.

Terry and Ramona are going to throw off the vibes of the talent show. Maybe

their talent could be grinding conversation to a halt.

What's all this?

Oh, that is the little business plan for the place down the shore.

What do you think?

Well, I think when you mentioned doing an Airbnb, I didn't realize you were,

like, make a whole binder series about it. It's not an Airbnb.

It's a B &B, like a bed and breakfast that I could run.

New hardship.

Okay, cool. Well, have fun. Tell me how your life goes.

Wait, are you mad?

Well, I'm not psyched. You're like planning a new Airbnb life down the

without me. It's not air.

And it's not without you.

This isn't happening tomorrow. There's going to be loans and inspections.

And before any of that, I need to talk to Danny and see if he's even into it.

Oh, well, that makes sense because Danny's your husband and I'm a cartoon

that you hang out with.

Do you really not see what's mean about planning a life without me? You're the

one who wanted us to do our own thing.

Yeah, I meant like we get off each other's backs, not like we need an easy

to go see each other.

I don't think slamming drawers is healthy.

I am not mad. I am thinking while closing drawers that are sticky.

Jack, Danny does this for a living.

This binder is just... A bunch of shit I printed off Getty Images until Danny

either likes it or doesn't. Yeah, or worse, until Danny likes it then

Big idea Jones changed his mind about what he wants every two weeks.

I'm sorry.

Bet he'll like it.

to be in Brooklyn for your vegan Thanksgiving.

It's not vegan. You're adding that in for no reason.

I'll probably leave in like an hour.

You think you'll be back tomorrow for pie?

I got two things of cool whips so we can just raw dog one straight from the

container. Oh my god, don't say raw dog.

Is Adie having fun?

You think she'll be back for Christmas?

I don't know about that.

My therapist has been saying it's really good to Change up holiday traditions

after someone dies.

And this house. Yeah, it's hard.

There's just so many memories here.

Yeah, and they were all with Dad.

So, my friends and I were talking about taking our own trip for Christmas. Maybe

volunteer.

I'm sorry, is that okay?

Yeah, I know.

I get it. Yeah.

Yeah. Yes, definitely.

For sure. You should go somewhere, too.

Like, um, Sexy Christmas in Tokyo.

Honey, I am fine right here.

You don't worry about me, okay?

Okay.

Thank you. Okay.

Love you. Love you more.

It's okay, baby boy.

Come on, just leave the crib in case you guys sleep over on Christmas.

Oh, thanks, but he's used to that one.

Somebody kiss.

Is he hungry?

No, I just gave him a bottle.

Is his diaper wet?

It wasn't actually in his butt, just near his butt hole.

And if I had been by myself, he would have been like this for hours and hours.

Don't make me take the earring out of your butt.

Want me to help take down the crib?

Um, yeah, I don't know. Maybe later.

Wait, who has COVID?

I cannot get sick right before Loom Fest.

No, no, no. No one has COVID, all right? It's just a Pagano family Thanksgiving

tradition started by the late, great Nick Pagano.

Oh, and first prize is this bad boy.

Who's in?

Lila. Fuck. Lila, come on. Can I put you down for a song?

Mm -mm.

You still know how to play Riptide on the ukulele? No, I'm good, Uncle Jack.

All right.

Anybody else?

It's a tradition here we do. Come on, come on.

Terry! Can't believe I'm saying this, but let's bust out that guitar, huh?

Why would I have brought a guitar?

Hey!

Cat!

Sorry, did I scare you?

No, wait, sit.

Actually, I wanted to talk to you. Well, actually, I want to talk to you, too.

Oh, okay. Do you want to go first?

You go first.

Yeah, you go first. You go first.

OK.

OK. Well, this is going to sound like a zag.

Claude and I are moving to Italy.

Sorry. I went first.

What?

Yeah.

That's why we rented that stupid little car, because that's what we'll need when

we live in Claude's mountain village.

Mountain village? I know.

When Claude first said it, I thought, what? Am I going to have to put on skis

every time I need to go down to get toilet paper?

But then, we'd be closer to his family, you know, since we've always lived near

mine.

It's big, I know.

What do you think?

Okay, well, if this is your latest thing, fine.

What do you mean, my latest thing?

Do you not see that you keep doing this?

You retile a kitchen for no reason, and Patrizia, we all know how that turned

out.

You were emailing surrogates three months ago. Hey, madam, return to your

No, okay, I'm sorry, okay.

But you asked me what I thought, and you know I would never lie to you. I mean,

do you see yourself yodeling on an alp for the rest of your life?

Catherine, stop.

Claude really wants this.

And you're getting cold feet, and that's why you're fighting, and that's why you

asked me what I thought.

I'm gonna go remind Ann to put out both kinds of olives.

Yeah, you really should go fucking do that.

Hey, you talk to Danny?

Uh, kind of.

What do you mean, how do you kind of talk to someone? It's complicated, okay?

Don't worry about it. Wait, come on. I feel shitty about earlier.

Can we just knock free ball for a second?

What happened?

Jack, it is the middle of Thanksgiving.

Does everyone here need a one -act... about our communication skills, I am

Hey, we're trying to leave, but there's like a food delivery robot in the way.

That's my car.

Are you talking about me?

No.

It's this car.

Why doesn't it know I'm good at everything?

Is it just a car?

Really?

You've been stressed out all day.

I think this is about the move.

I know how hard it is. I've been there. I've done it.

Yeah?

You know how long it took me to adjust to your disgusting food and language?

I know.

I only want to go to Italy if you're excited to go to.

And get the fuck out so I can move the car.

It's okay. In Italy, we believe cars can touch a little bit.

You're

quiet.

You okay over there?

Oh, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Wow. since I found a stuffing that has wild rice, raisins, and jalapenos in it.

Should I throw it out or call the police?

Oh, hey, Ann.

Hey.

I just want to say thanks for inviting all of us with nowhere to go. It means

the world. That is so sweet, Terry.

You know, some of my friends were ribbing me about inviting too many

Well, I think it's beautiful.

No, I have to say I was a little shocked when I got your eve.

But then I'm like, Terry, there's only one reason why somebody would invite

many people to their house.

So many people that you can't hear your own thoughts because of the chatter.

And the reason is, Ann, you've got a big heart.

Yes.

Daddy.

Terry, go see if people want to.

Oh, okay.

Daddy!

Uh -uh. Nope.

All righty. Kate, can I grab you for a second? Yeah.

Katie, I'm sorry. Look, we are moving to Italy.

And parts of it are scary.

And Claude and I will have dumbass fights where I act like a little bad

tiny car.

But I'm a little bad about a lot of things. About the length of straight

shorts. When we enter a restaurant and a waiter says, welcome in.

The point is, this is our next chapter.

It's the next chapter that the man I love wants the most.

And I'm not going to let my bullshit fuck it up.

You sound sure.

You know, you could have said all that the first time.

So when do you go?

Two weeks.

Wow.

Okay, so you, my friend, are moving to Italy.

Yeah.

Congratulations.

I look forward to hearing you say, it's 3 p .m., why the fuck is everything

closed?

Don't let Jersey change you too much, little bro.

I don't want to find a gold chain in your neck rolls.

Well, actually, I think we might hold off on New Jersey for a second.

Yeah, I think we might stick around here for the holidays.

Seriously? Yeah.

Your mom kind of hinted we could stay. Okay.

Just maybe try to move out before your fully gray garden thing.

No, I say that with love. Yes, I deeply appreciate that.

Yeah. No gray gardens for us.

Okay.

I love you. Love you.

You too. Thank you. We'll send pics Thanksgiving day.

Thanksgiving day.

Cute in his camp.

Thanksgiving pimp. Dinner's ready.

Oh, great.

Better. Yes.

Wow. I feel good.

All right, the turkey's ready.

Oh.

Oh, Jack, you can sit here and I'll go sit at the card table. No, no, no, no.

You stay. I'm happy to sit at the card table. Yeah. Thank you.

Hi.

Oh, hi. Park it here. Park it here.

turkey pork. Oh, wow.

Hey, have any of you seen Kate?

No.

So, Jeff, you work at ShopRite with Rita?

Uh,

excuse me.

Kate?

Hey.

What happened?

Is this about Danny?

What'd he say?

I'm fine. Go.

No, Kate, come on. You're crying.

I talked to Danny.

There's too much to explain.

Wait, was he snarky about it?

I mean, this Thanksgiving is fucked up enough without the core group turning on

each other. What are you talking about core group? We're not the fucking

Goonies.

Wait, why'd you throw out the Airbnb?

It's not air and it's not happening. Go out.

Not air. Were you mean about the binder of it?

Are you having a stroke?

Am I having a stroke?

Jack, are you OK?

You need to calm down.

No, no, no, no. He needs to answer me. All right? Kate is upstairs right now

sobbing. Stop telling him.

Look, you don't want to do the bed and breakfast?

Fine. But you didn't have to hurt her. What bed and breakfast?

All I said was that we're moving to Italy.

What? You're moving to Italy? Uh -huh.

Oh, so what? Just fuck? the core group. Stop saying core group.

Jack, you need to take a deep breath. You're approaching a woman who needs to

duct taped to her plane seat territory.

Jack, stop it. Wait, why are you carving the turkey before we say what we're all

thankful for?

What, this is the turkey?

Oh, I thought it was a little side turkey for like me and Ramona.

Okay, you know what?

Thank you, and I appreciate you, and I love you, and drive safe.

Are you okay?

I'm sorry I called you a wong.

A wong? A wang. A wang. What is a wang? Don't even worry about it. I'm fine.

Although I have been a wang.

I'm sorry about today.

I'm excited to go with you to Italy. I'm so excited.

And if it makes you happy, I'll get an even smaller car when we get there.

I can drive with my head popping out of the sun.

Why are these things two modes, broken umbrella and bear trap?

I brought you some leftovers for the weekend, and the meat is rotisserie

from my fridge. I promise it is not dirt turkey.

Thanks.

I, um, I was thinking of maybe taking you up on your offer to stay just a

bit longer. I know you were, but I am kicking you out.

You are ready for this, and you are good at it, Jenny.

Okay, yeah, but what if I fuck up, and you're not there to help me? Yeah, it's

okay to fuck up. It is literally how you get better at it.

I just hate seeing you doubt yourself, because once you invite that voice into

your head, the one that tells you that you can't do anything, it is really hard

to evict that fucker.

You got to trust me on that one.

Okay. I got to get one last hit off of this good stuff. Yes.

I got to get one last hit off of this good stuff.

Boy.

Boy.

Sand meter piece back.

Let me see it.

Oh, what were you thinking?

I mean, isn't it obvious?

I wanted to ruin Thanksgiving and the marathon that I worked all year on.

I definitely wasn't worried about my crying wife who won't talk to me. Oh,

my fault. That's why you kicked everyone's dinner across the... I fucked

okay?

It's okay.

You're going to be okay.

I'm really sorry. I mean, I... Me too.

Think of the amazing story you gave Ramona for Loom Fest.

God.

We've been married like a billion years. How are we still so bad at this?

I don't know.

But, you know, maybe growing further apart on purpose was a stupid idea.

Okay, kiddo.

Okay, it's just you and me now.

Yeah.

How'd you like to gray gardens with me for the next 18 to 40 years?

That's a yes.

Okay.

Annie!

Annie.

Everybody. Good night.