Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:01,563 --> 00:00:07,641
- Sync and corrections by ByDem -
- www.addic7ed.com -
2
00:00:07,782 --> 00:00:09,815
D'oh!
3
00:00:11,686 --> 00:00:13,552
Fold down that...
4
00:00:13,588 --> 00:00:14,687
and then up that...
5
00:00:14,722 --> 00:00:15,821
and this and over there
6
00:00:15,857 --> 00:00:17,723
and you have a beautiful swan!
7
00:00:17,759 --> 00:00:18,724
What the...?!
8
00:00:26,207 --> 00:00:30,183
This is Anger Watkins, and
you're watching basic cable's
9
00:00:30,208 --> 00:00:31,978
angriest sports show.
10
00:00:32,111 --> 00:00:34,247
Folks, this is difficult to say,
11
00:00:34,282 --> 00:00:36,415
but, today, I'm angry!
12
00:00:36,451 --> 00:00:37,849
I like how angry he is.
13
00:00:37,951 --> 00:00:39,418
I want to broach a topic
14
00:00:39,454 --> 00:00:43,356
that no one else has the
airtime to fill to discuss.
15
00:00:43,391 --> 00:00:45,224
Greatest of All Time.
16
00:00:45,260 --> 00:00:47,226
LeBron, Kobe or MJ?
17
00:00:47,262 --> 00:00:49,888
I'll tell you why you're all wrong!
18
00:00:49,927 --> 00:00:51,364
Let's open the lines.
19
00:00:51,399 --> 00:00:53,165
The producer says I'm gonna go on.
20
00:00:53,201 --> 00:00:54,500
Please, Sports Jesus,
21
00:00:54,536 --> 00:00:56,335
guide my blather.
22
00:00:56,371 --> 00:00:57,603
Welcome to Rage Nation.
23
00:00:57,639 --> 00:00:59,372
What the hell is your problem?
24
00:00:59,407 --> 00:01:02,169
Uh, first-time listener,
25
00:01:02,216 --> 00:01:03,724
long-time caller.
26
00:01:03,794 --> 00:01:05,144
So, I, uh...
27
00:01:05,179 --> 00:01:06,245
Give me a take!
28
00:01:06,281 --> 00:01:07,346
Anger needs a take.
29
00:01:07,382 --> 00:01:09,315
Who is number one?
30
00:01:09,350 --> 00:01:11,117
Uh, John Stockton!
31
00:01:11,152 --> 00:01:12,285
John Stockton?!
32
00:01:12,320 --> 00:01:14,353
We're trying to have
our daily conversation
33
00:01:14,389 --> 00:01:17,590
in which we rank
and re-rank three demigods,
34
00:01:17,625 --> 00:01:22,128
and you bring John "Never Won
a Title" Stockton into the mix?!
35
00:01:22,163 --> 00:01:25,398
Shame! For shame!
36
00:01:29,304 --> 00:01:32,271
Homer, you got flushed.
37
00:01:32,307 --> 00:01:33,606
A man who don't know sports,
38
00:01:33,641 --> 00:01:36,098
um, he ain't much of a man.
39
00:01:36,123 --> 00:01:39,579
You're nothing to me now.
Just a husband and father.
40
00:01:39,614 --> 00:01:41,542
Stupid Anger Watkins
41
00:01:41,567 --> 00:01:43,249
flushing me with an audio effect.
42
00:01:43,284 --> 00:01:46,252
Why not eat your feelings
with a cheer-up kebab?
43
00:01:46,287 --> 00:01:48,354
Let's see. Pizza slice,
44
00:01:48,389 --> 00:01:50,389
summer sausage...
45
00:01:53,227 --> 00:01:54,360
Here you go.
46
00:01:54,395 --> 00:01:57,229
It was only a dumb call-in show.
47
00:01:57,265 --> 00:01:58,431
Easy for you to say.
48
00:01:58,466 --> 00:02:00,633
If that jerk
didn't like your sports notions,
49
00:02:00,668 --> 00:02:02,435
listen to someone else.
50
00:02:02,470 --> 00:02:05,204
The Internet's full
of homemade sports shows.
51
00:02:05,239 --> 00:02:07,106
Anyone could put one on,
52
00:02:07,141 --> 00:02:08,407
- I mean, even...
- Don't say "you."
53
00:02:08,443 --> 00:02:09,408
Don't say "you."
54
00:02:09,444 --> 00:02:10,443
Even you.
55
00:02:10,478 --> 00:02:11,577
Damn it.
56
00:02:11,613 --> 00:02:13,792
Oh, yes. Of course!
57
00:02:13,831 --> 00:02:16,158
An Internet sports talk show!
58
00:02:16,183 --> 00:02:17,383
But where could I find a host
59
00:02:17,418 --> 00:02:19,285
who thinks all my opinions are great?
60
00:02:19,320 --> 00:02:22,221
Me.
61
00:02:22,256 --> 00:02:25,391
Marge, prepare a congratulations kebab.
62
00:02:35,203 --> 00:02:37,436
These are hard as rocks.
63
00:02:37,472 --> 00:02:39,305
Food fight!
64
00:02:43,511 --> 00:02:46,245
Uh, this calls for massive retaliation.
65
00:02:46,280 --> 00:02:48,381
Use your quadratic equations, men.
66
00:03:01,329 --> 00:03:03,496
Oh, my God. I'm having a flashback.
67
00:03:06,200 --> 00:03:08,234
Good Lord, I'm reliving
the Tot Offensive.
68
00:03:08,269 --> 00:03:10,369
Skinner...
69
00:03:10,405 --> 00:03:12,238
I'll Heimlich you, sir.
70
00:03:12,273 --> 00:03:14,407
Just be still so I can embrace
you from behind.
71
00:03:16,344 --> 00:03:18,377
Get... off... me.
72
00:03:19,614 --> 00:03:22,381
Shh, you're safe now.
73
00:03:27,255 --> 00:03:31,357
Now, which of you little
hoodlums tossed the first tot?
74
00:03:31,392 --> 00:03:33,125
- The nerd did it.
- Principal Skinner,
75
00:03:33,161 --> 00:03:34,460
it wasn't me. It was physics.
76
00:03:34,495 --> 00:03:36,395
Is this true, Fizix?
77
00:03:36,431 --> 00:03:39,398
I would've thought better of a
Turkemenistani exchange student.
78
00:03:39,434 --> 00:03:41,500
Ah! I had nothing to do with it.
79
00:03:41,536 --> 00:03:45,271
I came to this country
to escape food-based violence.
80
00:03:45,306 --> 00:03:48,174
Lisa, one week's detention.
81
00:04:09,499 --> 00:04:11,666
Welcome to Walkoff Homer!
82
00:04:11,701 --> 00:04:13,367
This is Homer Simpson,
83
00:04:13,403 --> 00:04:15,369
the rudest dude on the InnerTube.
84
00:04:15,405 --> 00:04:18,106
They say Muhammad Ali
was the greatest of all time,
85
00:04:18,161 --> 00:04:20,708
but he never fought Cassius Clay.
86
00:04:20,743 --> 00:04:22,643
What was he afraid of?
87
00:04:22,679 --> 00:04:24,545
Boom! Hot take.
88
00:04:24,580 --> 00:04:26,414
And how come, in basketball,
89
00:04:26,449 --> 00:04:28,416
they use the basket all the time
90
00:04:28,451 --> 00:04:31,552
but you could literally play
football without any feet?
91
00:04:31,587 --> 00:04:32,687
This show sucks.
92
00:04:32,722 --> 00:04:36,424
I can't believe he's wasting
Flanders' Wi-Fi on this.
93
00:04:36,459 --> 00:04:37,658
Here's a few things that bug me.
94
00:04:37,694 --> 00:04:40,394
How can they call traveling
on a home team?
95
00:04:40,430 --> 00:04:42,161
Why is soccer so stupid?
96
00:04:42,229 --> 00:04:44,229
How can they play hockey in a garden?
97
00:04:44,254 --> 00:04:46,500
Why can't golfers carry their own clubs?
98
00:04:46,536 --> 00:04:47,735
Lazy jerks.
99
00:04:51,441 --> 00:04:52,573
"Moose Poo"?!
100
00:04:52,608 --> 00:04:54,508
Why, you hilarious...
101
00:05:03,720 --> 00:05:05,686
Eat Sunset Rose!
102
00:05:05,722 --> 00:05:07,621
Semi-gloss.
103
00:05:20,503 --> 00:05:22,370
Seed bell?
104
00:05:22,405 --> 00:05:24,672
Like that's gonna stop me.
105
00:05:27,510 --> 00:05:28,642
Huh?
106
00:05:28,678 --> 00:05:30,411
Oh, so cute!
107
00:05:30,446 --> 00:05:32,413
Look at...
108
00:05:32,448 --> 00:05:34,448
Oh, my face! My face!
109
00:05:50,633 --> 00:05:52,733
What the hell's so funny?
110
00:06:00,977 --> 00:06:02,410
We must come together...
111
00:06:02,445 --> 00:06:04,311
to lower our carbon...
112
00:06:04,347 --> 00:06:06,480
- Stupid boy.
- Dumb dad.
113
00:06:06,516 --> 00:06:07,615
First, he ruins my life.
114
00:06:07,650 --> 00:06:09,316
- Then he ruins my livestream.
- Me ruining his show was
115
00:06:09,352 --> 00:06:11,283
- the only good part of his show.
- I'm gonna change the NHL with my idea
116
00:06:11,308 --> 00:06:12,586
Fat goalie was his only good take.
117
00:06:12,622 --> 00:06:14,655
- for morbidly obese goalies.
- Should've led with it.
118
00:06:15,725 --> 00:06:18,359
Hello. #FirstImpression.
119
00:06:18,394 --> 00:06:19,527
Oh, my God, a hipster!
120
00:06:19,562 --> 00:06:21,017
Marge, bring him a microbrew!
121
00:06:21,080 --> 00:06:22,530
- Quick!
- I'm on it!
122
00:06:25,611 --> 00:06:27,111
Ah...
123
00:06:27,136 --> 00:06:30,438
The alluvial hops really bring
out the riparian bitterness.
124
00:06:30,473 --> 00:06:31,572
He likes it.
125
00:06:31,607 --> 00:06:33,541
- I think.
- I did like it.
126
00:06:33,576 --> 00:06:35,443
My name's Warburton Parker.
127
00:06:35,478 --> 00:06:37,578
I'm a stranger to you.
Why should you listen to me?
128
00:06:37,613 --> 00:06:39,346
- You don't know my backstory.
- Mm-hmm.
129
00:06:39,382 --> 00:06:40,714
Well, here it is... colon...
130
00:06:40,750 --> 00:06:43,717
as a child,
my only friend was my computer.
131
00:06:43,753 --> 00:06:45,419
I was teased every day.
132
00:06:45,455 --> 00:06:46,587
Then I became a pro snowboarder,
133
00:06:46,622 --> 00:06:48,622
married a supermodel, went into tech,
134
00:06:48,658 --> 00:06:50,524
made a fortune, bought the factories
135
00:06:50,560 --> 00:06:52,693
where the kids who teased me's
parents worked
136
00:06:52,728 --> 00:06:54,462
and shut the factories down.
137
00:06:54,497 --> 00:06:55,629
Do you have a backstory?
138
00:06:55,665 --> 00:06:57,731
Once, when I was six, I ate a radio.
139
00:06:57,767 --> 00:06:59,533
I like you,
140
00:06:59,569 --> 00:07:00,768
but that won't get in the way.
141
00:07:00,803 --> 00:07:02,470
Let me cut to the chase.
142
00:07:02,505 --> 00:07:03,704
I make money from viral videos.
143
00:07:03,739 --> 00:07:06,507
And you two have gone viral.
144
00:07:06,542 --> 00:07:10,277
"Raccoon in a revolving door" viral.
145
00:07:13,483 --> 00:07:15,683
You're right to dance in such a fashion.
146
00:07:15,718 --> 00:07:17,518
Because I'll show you how to make videos
147
00:07:17,553 --> 00:07:19,553
that will make you rich.
148
00:07:19,589 --> 00:07:21,288
And me richer.
149
00:07:21,324 --> 00:07:22,523
And me richest.
150
00:07:22,558 --> 00:07:23,724
What are you doing here?
151
00:07:23,759 --> 00:07:26,527
I get an alert
whenever anyone's getting rich.
152
00:07:31,037 --> 00:07:35,138
Wow. 5.million views!
153
00:07:35,163 --> 00:07:37,251
Wow! Good, not great.
154
00:07:37,276 --> 00:07:39,110
That's the population of Colorado.
155
00:07:39,212 --> 00:07:40,311
Is that the Broncos one?
156
00:07:40,413 --> 00:07:42,246
- It is.
- Aw.
157
00:07:42,348 --> 00:07:45,282
The question is,
how much money have you made?
158
00:07:45,384 --> 00:07:47,284
Let's see. Uh, third quarter take...
159
00:07:47,386 --> 00:07:49,186
- Factor in overhead.
- Of course.
160
00:07:49,288 --> 00:07:50,354
- Overhead.
- Projections.
161
00:07:50,456 --> 00:07:51,422
Apples to apples.
162
00:07:51,524 --> 00:07:54,125
Figure net profit.
163
00:07:54,150 --> 00:07:55,536
Got it. Nothing.
164
00:07:55,561 --> 00:07:57,704
The question was rhetorical, you idiots.
165
00:07:57,729 --> 00:07:59,196
Sorry about the "idiots" thing.
166
00:07:59,298 --> 00:08:03,100
But what you need to do is monetize.
167
00:08:03,202 --> 00:08:06,203
- Monetize! Monetize!
- Monetize! Monetize!
168
00:08:06,305 --> 00:08:08,155
Monorail. Monorail.
169
00:08:08,311 --> 00:08:10,107
Wait, what are we talking about?
170
00:08:10,209 --> 00:08:12,343
Perhaps you are familiar
171
00:08:12,445 --> 00:08:14,445
with the greatest viral video
of all time,
172
00:08:14,547 --> 00:08:17,281
"Monkey smells finger
and falls out of tree."
173
00:08:17,383 --> 00:08:19,517
Hmm. No, I've never seen...
174
00:08:21,654 --> 00:08:23,554
Oh, my... Oh...
175
00:08:23,656 --> 00:08:25,289
Oh, that monkey!
176
00:08:33,399 --> 00:08:35,399
And the-the monkey!
177
00:08:37,637 --> 00:08:39,403
He smelled his finger.
178
00:08:42,241 --> 00:08:43,340
Then boom!
179
00:08:46,579 --> 00:08:49,146
Smell.
180
00:08:49,248 --> 00:08:51,382
That monkey and that monkey's estate
181
00:08:51,484 --> 00:08:53,417
made zero dollars.
182
00:08:53,519 --> 00:08:55,419
Even less in monkey dollars.
183
00:08:55,521 --> 00:08:57,188
If he had signed with me,
184
00:08:57,290 --> 00:08:58,355
I mean, just hypothetically,
185
00:08:58,457 --> 00:09:00,324
there would be... oh, I don't know...
186
00:09:00,426 --> 00:09:02,059
Monkey Finger Sniff T-shirts,
187
00:09:02,161 --> 00:09:03,460
Monkey Finger Sniff Finger Wipes,
188
00:09:03,563 --> 00:09:05,396
Monkey Finger Sniff sponsorships
189
00:09:05,498 --> 00:09:08,299
and a spot on Weekend Update on SNL.
190
00:09:08,401 --> 00:09:10,401
Host, Rami Malek or better.
191
00:09:10,503 --> 00:09:12,303
Musical guest, Pitbull.
192
00:09:12,405 --> 00:09:15,834
What this monkey didn't sniff
was opportunity.
193
00:09:15,943 --> 00:09:18,098
In the next five minutes,
you'll get more views
194
00:09:18,123 --> 00:09:20,077
than the entire rebooted Murphy Brown.
195
00:09:20,179 --> 00:09:21,345
Ugh, such high hopes.
196
00:09:21,447 --> 00:09:23,080
Not the same without Eldin.
197
00:09:23,182 --> 00:09:25,482
Now, this fight, you're
gonna get kickback from...
198
00:09:25,585 --> 00:09:28,185
- Duff Beer?
- Look at your shirt.
199
00:09:28,287 --> 00:09:30,154
Oh!
200
00:09:32,625 --> 00:09:34,425
Label to camera.
201
00:09:34,527 --> 00:09:36,160
Hey, label to camera.
202
00:09:41,367 --> 00:09:43,234
They're gonna love this publicity.
203
00:09:43,336 --> 00:09:46,136
You guys just earned your first quarter.
204
00:09:46,239 --> 00:09:47,271
First quarter revenue?
205
00:09:47,373 --> 00:09:49,988
No. First quarter, like the coin.
206
00:09:50,013 --> 00:09:51,993
Halt and Catch Fire, boy!
207
00:09:52,114 --> 00:09:53,146
Silicon Valley!
208
00:09:53,227 --> 00:09:55,088
How the Web Was Won.
209
00:09:55,135 --> 00:09:57,248
I'll give you another quarter
to shut up.
210
00:09:57,350 --> 00:09:59,283
Monetize.
211
00:10:03,222 --> 00:10:04,521
Look at us,
212
00:10:04,624 --> 00:10:06,190
the bully,
213
00:10:06,292 --> 00:10:08,292
the princess, more bullies,
214
00:10:08,394 --> 00:10:12,162
the Ralph and me, the
smart kid no one gets.
215
00:10:12,265 --> 00:10:14,164
Yet, maybe, by the end of the day,
216
00:10:14,267 --> 00:10:16,400
I'll realize this is just what I needed.
217
00:10:16,502 --> 00:10:18,269
This is what I needed
to break through the...
218
00:10:18,371 --> 00:10:19,436
Lisa, you don't belong here.
219
00:10:19,538 --> 00:10:21,572
Oh, thank God. So long, delinquents!
220
00:10:21,674 --> 00:10:25,242
Your detention is being held in
our new facility, the R.O.C.C.
221
00:10:25,344 --> 00:10:28,612
Welcome to the Remote On-site
Correctional Center.
222
00:10:28,714 --> 00:10:31,448
How can something be both remote
and on-site?
223
00:10:31,550 --> 00:10:33,317
All right, wisenheimer.
224
00:10:33,419 --> 00:10:35,519
You just earned yourself
a day in the hole.
225
00:10:35,621 --> 00:10:38,289
The Holistic Obstinance
Lessening Environment.
226
00:10:40,326 --> 00:10:42,226
Uh-oh.
227
00:10:42,328 --> 00:10:44,461
There's nothing in here
but old Goosebumps books.
228
00:10:44,563 --> 00:10:46,230
Fine. Read those.
229
00:10:46,332 --> 00:10:49,466
They aren't scary. They aren't scary!
230
00:10:49,568 --> 00:10:51,502
What happened to regular detention?
231
00:10:51,604 --> 00:10:53,270
Well, because we could no longer afford
232
00:10:53,372 --> 00:10:54,715
any after-school activity,
233
00:10:54,740 --> 00:10:57,174
the school district has
outsourced detention.
234
00:10:57,276 --> 00:10:59,343
Welcome to Misbehavior Solutions,
235
00:10:59,445 --> 00:11:01,412
a Torture 500 company.
236
00:11:01,514 --> 00:11:03,580
You privatized detention?
237
00:11:03,683 --> 00:11:06,283
Lisa, you have to understand.
238
00:11:06,385 --> 00:11:08,152
Anyone who's done anything remotely poor
239
00:11:08,254 --> 00:11:09,453
is in private prison.
240
00:11:09,555 --> 00:11:11,488
Oh, did I say "poor"? I meant wrong.
241
00:11:11,590 --> 00:11:13,223
No more questions.
242
00:11:13,326 --> 00:11:15,326
So, how's the monetizing going?
243
00:11:15,428 --> 00:11:16,560
Pick a hand.
244
00:11:16,662 --> 00:11:18,262
Pick again.
245
00:11:18,364 --> 00:11:19,463
Not the same hand.
246
00:11:19,565 --> 00:11:21,298
I'm not a magician.
It's in the other hand.
247
00:11:21,400 --> 00:11:22,566
Please pick the other hand.
248
00:11:22,668 --> 00:11:24,335
All right, I'm just gonna
show you the check.
249
00:11:24,437 --> 00:11:26,136
Oh, my God!
250
00:11:26,238 --> 00:11:28,305
$5,000!
251
00:11:28,407 --> 00:11:30,541
This will come in handy
when I buy a boat!
252
00:11:33,346 --> 00:11:35,579
Now, for the really big money,
I sold the location rights
253
00:11:35,681 --> 00:11:37,481
- to your next fight.
- Huh?
254
00:11:37,583 --> 00:11:40,417
No, no, no. This needs
to be a discussion.
255
00:11:40,519 --> 00:11:42,252
It's here in this
fried chicken restaurant.
256
00:11:42,355 --> 00:11:43,554
End of discussion.
257
00:11:43,656 --> 00:11:46,156
You see, this place
has an image problem.
258
00:11:46,258 --> 00:11:47,491
They've had nine salmonella deaths
259
00:11:47,593 --> 00:11:50,327
and one fried pinky in the past week.
260
00:11:50,429 --> 00:11:51,628
Mmm...
261
00:11:51,731 --> 00:11:54,264
Salmon-ella.
262
00:11:54,367 --> 00:11:56,467
So they want you two... you and you...
263
00:11:56,569 --> 00:11:58,335
to change the conversation.
264
00:11:58,437 --> 00:12:00,604
If there's a regional,
casual dining chain
265
00:12:00,706 --> 00:12:03,474
that needs my help, I'm there!
266
00:12:03,576 --> 00:12:06,410
My heroes.
267
00:12:06,512 --> 00:12:08,445
Okay, kind of, you know, fake nibble.
268
00:12:08,547 --> 00:12:10,414
- Pretend you're enjoying the thighs.
- I am.
269
00:12:10,516 --> 00:12:11,548
Uh, they're made of wax.
270
00:12:11,650 --> 00:12:13,384
Whatever. I'm on my fourth bucket.
271
00:12:13,486 --> 00:12:15,486
Sad. Okay, just action.
272
00:12:16,655 --> 00:12:19,423
Why, you little...
273
00:12:21,394 --> 00:12:23,360
And escalate and escalate.
274
00:12:23,462 --> 00:12:25,329
Views, views, views.
275
00:12:25,431 --> 00:12:27,431
Yes!
276
00:12:27,533 --> 00:12:30,167
Feel the burn. Literally sit in it.
277
00:12:30,269 --> 00:12:32,236
Would you like some onion rings?
278
00:12:32,338 --> 00:12:33,992
I don't see why not.
279
00:12:34,234 --> 00:12:37,608
Ah. Beautiful.
280
00:12:37,710 --> 00:12:40,444
Look at those view numbers fly.
281
00:12:40,546 --> 00:12:42,212
I-I shouldn't say this.
282
00:12:42,314 --> 00:12:43,414
No, I-I'm gonna say it.
283
00:12:43,516 --> 00:12:45,215
Okay, I say it a lot.
284
00:12:45,317 --> 00:12:49,353
You two are more beloved
than Marathon-Diarrhea Guy.
285
00:12:49,455 --> 00:12:52,222
- I love that guy.
- Best guy.
286
00:12:52,324 --> 00:12:54,425
We have so many sick
sponsored fights lined up.
287
00:12:54,527 --> 00:12:56,527
We're gonna make
Marathon-Diarrhea Guy look
288
00:12:56,629 --> 00:12:58,529
like Dog on Washing Machine.
289
00:12:58,631 --> 00:13:02,166
- I love that dog!
- Best dog.
290
00:13:04,503 --> 00:13:07,104
Violence is the best.
291
00:13:07,206 --> 00:13:09,339
Dad, you're holding my hand.
292
00:13:09,442 --> 00:13:11,108
Is that weird?
293
00:13:11,210 --> 00:13:12,276
I've seen it in books.
294
00:13:12,378 --> 00:13:15,112
Say, boy, can I buy you a...?
295
00:13:15,214 --> 00:13:17,581
Nah, I'm good, but thanks.
296
00:13:17,683 --> 00:13:19,450
Give me a Duff, Moe.
297
00:13:19,552 --> 00:13:21,518
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Your money's no good here.
298
00:13:21,620 --> 00:13:24,288
You're a celebrity now, Mr. YouTube.
299
00:13:24,390 --> 00:13:26,290
The biggest one this bar has seen
300
00:13:26,392 --> 00:13:28,525
since the snake
that ate three pool balls.
301
00:13:28,627 --> 00:13:31,195
Got a picture of that. See it?
302
00:13:31,297 --> 00:13:32,463
Anything I can do for you.
303
00:13:32,565 --> 00:13:34,298
Anything. You just name it.
304
00:13:34,400 --> 00:13:36,400
Well, little more
than I thought you'd ask for,
305
00:13:36,502 --> 00:13:38,368
but, uh, no, I respect the greed.
306
00:13:38,471 --> 00:13:40,370
Now I'm going back to my people.
307
00:13:40,473 --> 00:13:42,306
Hey, how you doing?
308
00:13:45,578 --> 00:13:49,179
It's that kid from YouTube!
309
00:13:49,281 --> 00:13:52,549
You, my friend, are getting an escort.
310
00:13:52,651 --> 00:13:56,420
Nah-nah, nah-nah, nah-nah.
311
00:13:56,522 --> 00:13:58,255
Aw, isn't that cute?
312
00:13:58,357 --> 00:14:01,291
Let's give the biggest one a gun
and take the week off.
313
00:14:03,496 --> 00:14:06,196
Milhouse, why are you in detention?
314
00:14:06,298 --> 00:14:08,432
For using the metric side of my ruler.
315
00:14:08,534 --> 00:14:11,201
That seems pretty arbitrary.
316
00:14:11,303 --> 00:14:13,270
Uh, why am I here?
317
00:14:13,372 --> 00:14:16,473
All I did was wear swim trunks
in the shower.
318
00:14:16,575 --> 00:14:18,308
They're packing detention
319
00:14:18,410 --> 00:14:19,543
with minor infractors.
320
00:14:19,645 --> 00:14:21,311
But why?
321
00:14:21,413 --> 00:14:23,380
Why do corporations do anything?
322
00:14:23,482 --> 00:14:25,249
To help society.
323
00:14:25,351 --> 00:14:27,317
We need you
to make kiddie license plates.
324
00:14:27,419 --> 00:14:30,220
I need 100 Caitlyns, 100 Kaitlyns
325
00:14:30,322 --> 00:14:32,849
and a thousand Kate... Lynns.
326
00:14:32,874 --> 00:14:35,159
Oh, my mom's picking me up.
327
00:14:35,261 --> 00:14:36,426
She'll be frantic!
328
00:14:36,529 --> 00:14:38,529
Oh, they said
I could pick him up at midnight.
329
00:14:38,631 --> 00:14:40,164
Mm!
330
00:14:40,266 --> 00:14:41,565
You want something stamped?
331
00:14:41,667 --> 00:14:43,367
How about this?
332
00:14:43,469 --> 00:14:45,402
Strike! Strike! Strike!
333
00:14:45,504 --> 00:14:47,538
Strike! Strike! Strike!
334
00:14:47,640 --> 00:14:50,374
Strike! Strike! Strike!
335
00:14:50,476 --> 00:14:52,176
How do you know about unions?
336
00:14:52,278 --> 00:14:54,511
'Cause our history books end
in the 1930s.
337
00:14:55,681 --> 00:14:57,581
Thanks, guys.
338
00:14:57,683 --> 00:14:59,383
Hey, Dad!
339
00:14:59,485 --> 00:15:02,252
Hey, son! I kind of missed you.
340
00:15:02,354 --> 00:15:04,188
I kind of missed you, too.
341
00:15:04,290 --> 00:15:05,455
Aw.
342
00:15:05,558 --> 00:15:07,257
Okay, they're hugging.
343
00:15:07,359 --> 00:15:09,259
Excuse me, but I thought
the hate was real.
344
00:15:09,361 --> 00:15:10,863
I have not been so angry
345
00:15:10,888 --> 00:15:13,230
since I saw every Star Wars
since the second.
346
00:15:13,332 --> 00:15:15,399
They are no longer my heroes!
347
00:15:15,501 --> 00:15:19,369
Kumiko, we are changing
the Comic-Con costumes.
348
00:15:19,471 --> 00:15:21,371
We're going back to our old costumes...
349
00:15:21,473 --> 00:15:23,273
Sailor Moon and the Moon.
350
00:15:28,382 --> 00:15:31,745
Hey there, Chalmers. Hey there, Skinner.
351
00:15:31,770 --> 00:15:34,738
We will be here until dinner!
352
00:15:34,840 --> 00:15:38,308
These Norma Rae-sinets
refuse to back down.
353
00:15:38,410 --> 00:15:41,711
You can cut detention with a knife.
354
00:15:41,814 --> 00:15:43,747
In other news, the Pope has died.
355
00:15:43,849 --> 00:15:46,383
My corporation has a deal
with this school
356
00:15:46,452 --> 00:15:50,287
to provide free... kishly happy workers.
357
00:15:50,389 --> 00:15:51,755
You better fix this and fast.
358
00:15:51,857 --> 00:15:53,590
I think I have an answer.
359
00:15:53,692 --> 00:15:56,626
I know people who will do
anything for money
360
00:15:56,728 --> 00:16:00,497
as long as it doesn't involve kids...
361
00:16:00,599 --> 00:16:05,235
the teachers.
362
00:16:17,349 --> 00:16:18,348
Take it from the Moon.
363
00:16:18,450 --> 00:16:20,550
Bart and Homer have cratered.
364
00:16:20,652 --> 00:16:23,353
I hate them and I... uh-oh.
365
00:16:23,455 --> 00:16:25,388
So, because people think
you like each other,
366
00:16:25,491 --> 00:16:26,556
you're has-beens.
367
00:16:26,658 --> 00:16:27,691
Yesterday's views.
368
00:16:27,793 --> 00:16:29,526
Deader than MySpace.
369
00:16:29,628 --> 00:16:32,295
15 minutes of lame.
370
00:16:32,397 --> 00:16:35,432
Why are you still here around me?
371
00:16:35,534 --> 00:16:37,601
Please help us. It hurts so much to know
372
00:16:37,703 --> 00:16:40,403
that no one is clicking me or liking me.
373
00:16:40,506 --> 00:16:41,705
They might have no opinion.
374
00:16:41,807 --> 00:16:43,540
I can't live with that!
375
00:16:43,642 --> 00:16:46,643
May I make an original
and groundbreaking observation
376
00:16:46,745 --> 00:16:48,378
that no one has ever said before?
377
00:16:48,480 --> 00:16:50,413
There is one thing
that show business loves.
378
00:16:50,516 --> 00:16:51,748
- Betty White?
- A comeback.
379
00:16:51,850 --> 00:16:53,550
We are going to put you out in front
380
00:16:53,652 --> 00:16:55,318
of some of the greatest influencers
381
00:16:55,420 --> 00:16:57,144
and tastemakers alive.
382
00:16:57,169 --> 00:16:59,456
We will remake Bart and Homer Brand.
383
00:16:59,558 --> 00:17:02,459
What do you say to BHB2?
384
00:17:02,484 --> 00:17:04,093
Is it a drug? Lay it on me.
385
00:17:04,132 --> 00:17:06,563
It stands for
"Bart Homer Brand 2," you moron.
386
00:17:06,665 --> 00:17:08,532
Of course it is.
387
00:17:08,634 --> 00:17:10,433
Is it a pill?
388
00:17:10,536 --> 00:17:12,369
Or the other end?
389
00:17:13,772 --> 00:17:16,573
This is the largest gathering
of social media influencers
390
00:17:16,675 --> 00:17:18,119
in the western hemisphere.
391
00:17:18,144 --> 00:17:19,342
There's Detonator,
392
00:17:19,444 --> 00:17:21,378
the Internet's leading
walkthrough gamer.
393
00:17:21,480 --> 00:17:22,612
What's your side quest, Demon?
394
00:17:22,714 --> 00:17:24,548
- Uh, well, I...
- Terminate dialogue tree.
395
00:17:24,650 --> 00:17:26,349
Return to main quest.
396
00:17:26,374 --> 00:17:28,173
Hmm.
397
00:17:28,472 --> 00:17:29,604
Hey, there's Leslie Sky.
398
00:17:29,706 --> 00:17:32,474
She does makeup tutorials
with veiled white nationalism.
399
00:17:32,576 --> 00:17:35,577
For the foundation,
we can either go with brown,
400
00:17:35,679 --> 00:17:37,278
or skin color.
401
00:17:37,380 --> 00:17:39,447
Oh, my God, it's Jurgen,
402
00:17:39,549 --> 00:17:41,416
Southern Norway's leading unboxer.
403
00:17:41,518 --> 00:17:44,452
First we take the burger box
from the bag, yeah.
404
00:17:44,554 --> 00:17:48,423
Carefully open the box
so it can be reclasped.
405
00:17:48,448 --> 00:17:49,501
Mm-hmm.
406
00:17:49,526 --> 00:17:50,692
Robust hinging.
407
00:17:56,366 --> 00:17:57,665
I am tired now.
408
00:17:57,767 --> 00:17:59,567
And winter comes.
409
00:18:03,373 --> 00:18:06,207
And now, to tell you
what you're gonna do.
410
00:18:06,309 --> 00:18:08,610
Live Online.
411
00:18:08,712 --> 00:18:10,578
Doesn't "mortal" mean "dead"?
412
00:18:10,680 --> 00:18:14,249
Um, it can, but it's just
a figure of speech.
413
00:18:14,351 --> 00:18:16,217
So we don't kill each other?
414
00:18:16,319 --> 00:18:18,286
Oh, if you did, that would be great.
415
00:18:18,388 --> 00:18:20,388
But let's play it by ear. Okay, guys,
416
00:18:20,413 --> 00:18:21,533
when you're in combat,
417
00:18:21,558 --> 00:18:23,258
definitely killing each other,
418
00:18:23,360 --> 00:18:25,393
it's important to feature
your sponsored weapons.
419
00:18:25,495 --> 00:18:28,196
Bart, you're promoting Netflix.
420
00:18:28,298 --> 00:18:31,232
Got it? And Trident gum.
421
00:18:31,334 --> 00:18:34,168
Homer, you're repping Axe Body Spray
422
00:18:34,271 --> 00:18:36,471
and Trident Spearmint gum.
423
00:18:36,496 --> 00:18:37,649
Do you get it, Homer?
424
00:18:37,674 --> 00:18:39,474
The product things match the words.
425
00:18:39,576 --> 00:18:41,442
I don't know, this seems kind of lame.
426
00:18:41,467 --> 00:18:42,587
You know what's not lame?
427
00:18:42,612 --> 00:18:44,579
An audience of 200 livestreams
428
00:18:44,681 --> 00:18:46,414
while you kill your own father.
429
00:18:46,516 --> 00:18:48,349
Or whatever. Feel it out.
430
00:18:48,451 --> 00:18:51,252
I don't know, I'm gonna need
some more inspiration.
431
00:18:51,354 --> 00:18:54,589
Oh, my God, is it really you?
432
00:18:57,360 --> 00:18:59,460
It is.
433
00:18:59,563 --> 00:19:02,430
Ladies and gentlemen,
434
00:19:02,532 --> 00:19:05,500
YouTubers, Instagrammers,
435
00:19:05,602 --> 00:19:08,570
and homeless former Viners,
436
00:19:08,672 --> 00:19:11,606
you loved them in their
smackdown at Panda Express.
437
00:19:11,708 --> 00:19:14,375
Then they hugged
and you were like, "What?"
438
00:19:14,477 --> 00:19:17,245
Homer and Bart Simpson!
439
00:19:17,347 --> 00:19:19,347
Do I smell fear?
440
00:19:19,449 --> 00:19:21,215
I'm not afraid of you.
441
00:19:21,318 --> 00:19:25,253
You're smelling the refreshing
scent of Axe Body Spray.
442
00:19:25,355 --> 00:19:26,588
Dark Temptation.
443
00:19:37,367 --> 00:19:40,301
I don't know, Dad.
This just doesn't feel right.
444
00:19:40,403 --> 00:19:41,603
I don't want to fight you.
445
00:19:41,705 --> 00:19:43,504
Me, neither, son.
446
00:19:47,510 --> 00:19:50,645
Who'd have thought that two guys
from such different worlds
447
00:19:50,747 --> 00:19:52,547
could connect like us?
448
00:19:55,518 --> 00:19:57,518
Quit using your words!
449
00:20:21,790 --> 00:20:23,490
Hello. I'm Homer Simpson.
450
00:20:23,592 --> 00:20:27,394
And this is episode
two of Walkoff Homer.
451
00:20:27,496 --> 00:20:28,595
Today's question:
452
00:20:28,697 --> 00:20:31,631
are sports talk shows a complete
and utter waste of time?
453
00:20:31,734 --> 00:20:33,500
We will get to the bottom of this
454
00:20:33,602 --> 00:20:35,502
within the next five hours.
455
00:20:35,604 --> 00:20:37,537
Five hours?!
456
00:20:37,639 --> 00:20:39,573
I can't get my point across
in five hours.
457
00:20:39,675 --> 00:20:42,442
My whole career depends on me never
quite getting to the finish.
458
00:20:42,544 --> 00:20:44,086
Because I know...
459
00:20:44,111 --> 00:20:48,275
- Sync and corrections by ByDem -
- www.addic7ed.com -
31800
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Spanish
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
