All language subtitles for charlies.angels.s05e09.remastered.bip.x264-rovers-en

CHARLIE:
Once upon a time

there were
three beaulifu/ girls.

0h.

Two 0/ them graduated
from the police academy.

[TIRE SCREECHES]

The other graduated
from a top school for models.

And they each
reaped the re wards

of their exciting careers.

[CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS]

But I took them away
from a// that

and now they work for me.

My name is Charlie.

[m]

[m]

[CHUCKLES]

This is our day,
darling.

I know. I know.

Now, you two
stay here.

I'll be right back
with the good stuff.

I'd like our share

in a cashier's check,
please.

The only way
to fly.

Aren't you
sony now?

Sorry about what?

About John.

Aren't you sorry you doubted
him and aren't you ashamed?

No, I'm not ashamed.

As your older sister,

it's my duty to protect
our investments.

You just can't accept it,
can you?

You just can't accept
the idea

that someone like John
could love someone like me.

Okay,
I accept, I accept.

Now I'm gonna go
get a paper.

Are you certain you wanna
carry all this cash,
Mr. Thornwood?

I love the feel of cash.
Crisp, friendly.

It was nice having a
corporation with you,
Mr. Harrison.

Short-lived,
though, it was, heh.

I've always found that
life's brief encounters

are sweeter somehow.

Do you mind it
I use your back door?

[m]

[TIRE SCREECHES]

JANE:
What's wrong?

That creep.
He's running out on us.

What are you
talking about?

John. He had a car
stashed in back

and he's splitting
with our money.

I don't believe it.
No, you wouldn't.

[CRASH]

[CAR HORN HONKING]

Are you hurt?

[WHIMPERING]

No.
Well, then shut up.

[SIGHS]

CHARLIE [OVER SPEAKERS]:
Miss Stone,

howmuch did Mr. Thornwood
cost you and your sister

before he fled
San Francisco?

Mr. Thornwood relieved my,
uh, sister

of a hundred
thousand dollars.

Unfortunately, since
our parents' death,

we have a mutual account.

And her loss
is my loss.

This John Thornwood,

his scam is a South American
oil exploration venture?

Yes, he put up
a hundred thousand dollars

of good faith money,

which, uh, we matched
in a corporation he setup.

The corporation
was legitimate.

[SIGHS]

KRIS:
But the oil well wasn't?

Yes.

John-- Mr. Thornwood
lied very convincingly.

You've been to the San
Francisco Police, of course.

And the state
attorney general

and a few other
minions of the law.

The bottom line is, that
with two countries involved

and all the red tape

the legal fees
and the time lost

will cost us more than hundred
thousand dollars we lost.

CHARLIE:
So you want us

to try to reco yer your money.

Is that right, Miss Stone?

Yes. But equally important

I want Mr. John Thornwood
punished forwhat he's done.

Well, Miss Stone, we might
be able to recover your money,

but we're not in the
business of punishing people.

0h, ldon't mean that
you should beat him up

or anything that gross,

even though
he does deserve it.

I just want him
off the street

so he doesn't take advantage
of, uh, other silly
young ladies.

[WHIMPERING]

Miss Stone,
do you have any idea

where Mr. Thornwood
is at the moment?

Well, just what I told
Mr. Townsend,

I heard he was
down here in Los Angeles.

CHARLIE:
/may have a line on him,
Bosley.

A friend of mine at city hall,
Department of Rent Control

says a man
named John Thornwood

has moved into a new
luxury apartment in the valley

called the l/l/iltern Arms.

All right, Charlie,
we'll check it out.

Then you will be staying here
in Los Angeles, Miss Stone?

Oh, yes.

To watch you hang
him out to dry.

[CRYING]

[m]

Just hold on, madam,
you hornswoggled rne.

KRIS:
Just keep your
voice down, Tex.

You cheated me.

Is that anything
like hornswoggled?

You're darn right
it is, little lady.

But the police got
another name for it.

Embezzlement.

KRIS:
Either you keep
your voice down

or I'm gonna call the police
and have them come

and toss you out of here.
You are crazy.

You did me out of $50,000

and you're gonna
call the police.

If you think you have
a case against me

then go talk to the
attorney general or something.

In the meantime,
either you get out of here

or you're gonna be parking
your boots in the hoosegow.

Me?
Oh, you are loco.

You are loco.

Oh, I'm sorry.
Did the noise disturb you?

Uh, no, no,
l was just getting in.

Your, uh, boyfriend seemed
a little upset.

Oh, no, he's just a business
acquaintance, urn...

We had this little
venture together

and it didn't
work out for us.

He's not taking it
too well, heh.

Too bad.

Oh, since we're neighbors,

my name is
Kris Munroe.

John Thornwood.

In case you wanna borrow
a cup of sugar or anything.

You'll be the first one
I'll call.

[m]

[CLICKS TONGUE]

[KNOCKING 0N DOOR]

Hi.

Your cup
runneth empty.

Well, you know
what they say.

Empty cup,
full heart.

It must be
chilly out there.

Something wet?

Sounds wonderful.

Mm.

Well, who would have
believed it.

Who would have
believed what?

Well, my evening started out
so unpleasantly

and it's ending
so nicely.

But it hasn't
ended yet.

Mm, I do have to
go home.

[CHUCKLES]

Don't con a conner.

What do you mean?

Now listen, don't play
games with me, okay?

I'm the one who saw
you blowing off

that mark in
the hallway, remember?

Mark?

Baby, drop it.

It takes one
to know one, right?

You made
a 50,000-dollar score.

I'm impressed.

Well, fancy that.

Birds of a feather living
right on the same roost.

[BOTH CHUCKLING]

[m]

Mm, I wonder
what Mr. Thornwood is doing

up so early
in the morning?

From what Kris could
learn last night

she gets
the impression

he's working another
con here in LA.

Shall we follow?

[TIRES SCREECH]

[m]

How very pretty
you look today, Miss Regis.

MONICA:
0h, Professor Thornwood.

I don't know what to do
when you say things like that.

The only thing
you can do, Miss Regis,

believe everything
I tell you, heh.

I found that material
you were asking about

on American folk art,
Professor Thornwood.

Oh, please.
Call me John.

Professor Thornwood?

Well, we know who
Thornwood's next victim is.

A lady who works
in a gallery?

It doesn't make sense.

Why don't you
find out who she is?

And I'll eavesdrop
a little.

Is the material helpful,
Professor Thornwood?

Imean, John.

Very. Very helpful.

|,uh...

I was wondering.
Yes?

Would you, uh, think me
terribly fonivard

if I ask you
to join me for dinner

to, uh, discuss a project
I'm considering?

Tonight?

Uh, no, not tonight,
but, uh, soon.

Tomorrow night?
Not that soon.

Night after tomorrow?

Whenever you're available.

I'm available
tomorrow night.

Good.

[m]

I'll pick you up
when you close.

I'll be waiting.

Pardon me.
What?

Ah, I couldn't help noticing
such a handsome man.

Is he a friend of yours?
Yes, he's my friend.

Actually, heh,
we're nearly engaged.

Oh, well,
you're a very lucky girl.

Yes, I am.

I love him.

Very much.

Find out
who she is?

Yes. Her name is
Monica Regis.

She owns this place.

Bingo.

Well, his next mark.

[m]

CHARLIE [OVER SPEAKERS]:
You're telling me, Kelly

that Monica Regis
fancies herself in love

with Professor Thornwood?

Well, I heard him
ask her out

on their first
dinner date.

The next thing,
she told me

he was about to
become her fiance.

When a nice,
intelligent woman

like Monica Regis
lies, Charlie,

she's definitely
in love.

CHARLIE:
Heh, is that how a man tells
when a woman's in love, Julie?

She lies?

Charlie.

And to think that
I've spent half of my life

in search
of an honest woman.

A fool's pursuit, Bosley.

CHARLIE:
Kris, do you think you'd be

able to persuade Thornwood
to become your partner?

Well, I'm working on it.

There's one thing
that worries me.

Which is?

Monica Regis.
| get the impression

that there's been very few
if any men in her life at all.

She could get hurt
very badly by Thornwood.

CHARLIE:
Perhaps if you became

her confidante, Kelly,
you could advise her.

Well, I'll try.

CHARLIE:
By the way, Bosley,

did you come up with anything
on Monica Regis' background?

Well, I'm not
really sure, Charlie.

You see, there seem to be
some discrepancies.

Discrepancies?

BOSLEY:
Yes. I couldn't find

any kind of family
background on her.

And although she does
own the Regis Gallery,

it was originally purchased
in her behalf by Trans Allied

which is some sort of
a financial holding company.

Maybe I should check
that out, Charlie.

CHARLIE:
Good idea. The more we know
about Thornwood’s victim,

the better
we can protect her.

Well, if there's a local
listing for Trans Allied,

I'll look in on them
in the morning.

BOSLEY:
Be careful, Julie.

There's a rumor
that Trans Allied

is syndicate-connected.

Meanwhile, I have to get back
to my new apartment.

I have invited
Professor Thornwood

for a quiet little dinner.

Oh, uh, how do you intend
to keep him at your table

and out of your bedroom?

Well, I'm not.

You are.
Oh.

Say again.

[m]

[SIGHS]

Okay.

Time for a little
something smooth.

Why don't we have
something smooth in there?

[PHONE RINGING]

Mm, right back.

Hello?

BOSLEY [OVER PHONE]:
Kris.

Oh, hello,
Mr. Popodopoulous.

How are you
this e vening?

Cold and uncomfortable.

How nice.

Well, have you thought
about my Egyptian project?

You have? Good.

Would you like to become
involved financially?

Wonderful.

Six months?

Oh, I'm afraid
I can't wait that long.

Yes. Yes, I understand.

Well, perhaps another
project another time.

Goodbye, Mr. Popodopoulous.

Andros.

[KRIS CLEARS THROAT]

Spill it.

What?

Your Egyptian project.

It wasn't
very important.

You're frowning.
That makes it important.

Your mark just
blew in empty, right?

No. He'll take the hook.

He just can't come up
with the money soon enough.

What's the setup?

I never mix
business with pleasure.

Business is best
when it is pleasure.

[m]

Okay. I'll tell you.

I did all this research,
I learned the lingo.

I set up this phony
mailing address in Egypt.

It's a buried
Egyptian gold scam.

Sounds like you've done
your homework.

I have.

What are you
using for bait?

Fifty thousand dollars.

And the mark puts up
matching funds.

It's an old saw,
but it always works.

Okay.

But why settle
for 50,000

when we can make it
a hundred and fifty?

I don't follow.

I've got a hundred thousand.

Are you saying
you want in on this?

Oh, you pick up quick.

Okay, okay.
What's the split?

Equal to investment.

I double my hundred thou,
you double your 50.

Oh, wait a minute.
I did all the groundwork.

Yes, but you just
lost your mark.

And I've got one
who can go the whole bundle.

Now.

Well, you certainly don't
waste any strokes,
do you, John?

Here's to sticking it
to the suckers.

[CHUCKLES]

My very thought.

JULIE:
Bos, are you sure I've got
the right address?

BOSLEY [OVER PHONE]:
Trans Allied
7930 West 57th Street.

But this doesn't look like
a financial holding company.

It looks like a--
Like a meat packing factory,

which it is.

Well, that's the address
in the phone book.

They're the ones who bought
the Regis Gallery.

Okay. All right.

I'll check it out
and get back to you. Bye-bye.

Who do you wanna
see exactly?

The boss. Exactly.

You'll have to
give me his name.

You don't know
your boss's name?

[CLICKS TONGUE]

The question is not,
"Do I know?"

The question is,
"Do you know?"

I, uh, represent a group
of cattlemen from the Midwest

who might be
interested in doing

some business
with this company.

Well, if you'll give me
the information...

Oh, no, no. They insist that I
speak to the
headman personally

since a great deal
of money is involved.

All right.

I'll let you see
Mr. Fenell.

But you better be
who you say you are.

Hey.
What are you doing?

Like I said, you better be
who you say you are.

[m]

Check out her purse
and call me back.

Hi.

Sit down, Miss, uh...
Rogers.

Julie Rogers.

You represent
some cattlemen?

Oh, yes.

What do they
want with me?

Well, uh, they heard a lot
of nice things about you.

They did?

Oh, I mean...

I mean, they said you were
a decent sort of fellow.

I am?

Aren't you?

[PHONE RINGS]

Yeah?

Townsend Agency?

What's that?

[m]

[CHUCKLES]

Oh, get her.

[GRU NTS]

Heyl Grab her!

[m]

[PANTING]

So the lady is
a detective.

I can explain.
No, I'll explain.

The first rule around here
is nobody lies to Joe.

Me. I'm Joe.

Good. Let's use
first names.

You wanna know what
the second rule
around here is?

How many guesses
do | get?

None. Because
I'm gonna tell you.

The second rule around here
is you don't lie to Joe.

Wasn't that
the first rule around here?

That's the first
and the second rule.

Now, does that
tell you anything?

You don't like
to be lied to?

Right.

Which means,
little lady,

that you are
in big, big trouble.

[m]

[m]

Young lady, I'm getting
tired of this.

Maybe you should sit down.

Who are you
and what are you doing here?

Listen,
this is all a mistake.

Why don't I just
take a walk

and we'll forget
the whole thing?

Look, you better
start talking

or the only way you'll get out
of here is feet first.

Okay. Okay,
I'll level with you.

Okay, I'm listening.

You're right.
I am a detective.

And, uh, my boss,
Mr. Charles Townsend,

was interested
in donating

some very valuable art pieces
to the Regis Gallery.

Art pieces?

Yes.

But he, uh, wanted
to make sure

that Monica Regis
was legitimate.

And, uh, her background
howeverwas a little muddled

and then when we learned
that Trans Allied Associates

purchased the gallery
in her behalf,

well, we wondered why.

And your boss wants to donate
something to this gallery?

Right.

So that's what
this is all about.

That's what this is
all about.

Okay. I'll make a
deal with you.

I'll take it.

The truth is,
Monica Regis is my daughter.

Your daughter?

That I care about a lot.

But why--? How come--?

That she uses
a different name?

Yeah.

Well, in my business,

| tangle
with the law sometimes.

You tangle with the law?

Sometimes
with the government.

Wait a minute.

Joseph Fenell,
Senate Rackets Committee,

about six weeks ago.

They tried to frame me.
They didn't make it stick.

Oh, I get it. You don't want
your daughter

touched by anything
publicly embarrassing.

Which was why
we changed her name.

Ah. Joe, you don't have to
worry about a thing.

Your secret's safe with me
and Mr. Townsend.

And your boss will still make
that donation

to my little girl's gallery?

Oh, absolutely.

I'll be anxious to see
what it is.

Oh, ye-- Me too.

[DOOR OPENS]

[m]

Well, it's about time
for Thornwood and Kris

to lay the hook
on Monica Regis.

Yup.

Your choice of exhibits
is most elegant.

[SIGHS]

You're very kind,
Miss Garrett.

Ah, I thought we agreed.

You were gonna call me Kelly
and I was gonna
call you Monica.

Fdends?

[CHUCKLES]

Ah, there's that
handsome fiance of yours.

Excuse me.
Hmm.

Now, what is the total
capitalization necessary?

Three hundred thousand.
Hmm.

So with your 50,000
and my hundred thousand

we've got
half ofwhat we need.

Yes, but unfortunately,
time is running out.

We need that other
hundred and fifty thousand

very quickly.

And that's not gonna be easy.
No.

But this could prove to be

the most
historically-significant

discovery of the century.

I mean, not to mention
the financial rewards.

Well, the financial rewards
would be pleasant, of course.

But you see,
I'm much more interested in

what we can accomplish
aesthetically.

KRIS:
I like you, professor.

Hello.

Hello.
Darling.

Well, I don't believe you've
met my associate,
Professor Munroe.

Professor, this is my
very good friend,
Monica Regis.

:5: :7

Well, I'll be running.

There are a couple of
other possible investors

I'd like to go talk to.

[CHUCKLES]

Dinner?

Yes.

Uh, I couldn't help
but overhear you.

It sounds like you're involved
with something interesting.

Oh, it'sjust
a personal dream of mine

with certain problems.

Nothing you should be
concerned with.

Oh, come on.

We have dinner reservations
in half an hour.

But maybe there's some way
I can help.

I don't think so, darling.
Oh, tell me, please.

Well, if you insist.
You see.

[m]

KRIS:
Wait a minute.
Run that by me again.

You did what?
I asked Miss Regis
to marry me.

When?
An hour ago.

Right after I reluctantly
explained to her

how we needed a hundred
and fifty thousand dollars.

But why? Why did you ask her
to marry you?

I always ask the mark
to marry me

before I ask her
for the money.

Hey, relax. I only ask.
I never do it.

So, what did she say?

Well, uh, yes, of course,
to the proposal.

And the hundred
and fifty thousand.

CHARLIE:
it seems Professor Thornwood

has given us a rather
knotty problem, Angels.

If Monica gets hurt
and I know she will, Charlie,

l'll personally crucify
Thornwood.

She's really in love
with him, Charlie.

We could simply tell her
the truth about him.

KELLY:
I doubt that she'd believe us.

[SNAPS FINGERS]

Wait a minute.

Maybe we could beat
Thornwood at his own game.

CHARLIE:
What do you mean, Kris?

Well,
if we could set it up

so that Thornwood
had to marry Monica Regis

to get the money,
he'd back out.

And she'd realize
what he was up to.

Well, it would save Monica
3 lot of future heartache.

Of course, it would blow
our chance to nail Thornwood.

Well, lthink we can find
another way to nail Thornwood.

Seems to me Miss
Regis' feelings

are the most important
consideration now.

I agree, Charlie.

Having met Monica's father,
I can tell you,

making her unhappy
could be very dangerous.

CHARLIE:
Oh, yes, you're right.
/ checked out Joe Fene/l

Eastern syndicate type,
very tough.

Uh, Kris, when are you and
Thornwood supposed to set up

your phony corporation
with Monica Regis?

Tomorrow morning.

Have you picked the bank
you're going to use?

Not yet.

Good.

Because the president
of Certified National Bank,

Bill Connors, is a friend
of mine. ll/ call him.

Maybe we can give
Professor Thornwood

some corporate
complications.

[m]

McBAIN:
Uh, Mr. Connors,
I don't understand.

Why can't
Miss Regis deposit

her hundred and fifty
thousand dollars

in the corporation now?
Well, uh, she could.

But since you and Miss Regis
are going to be married

it would be wise for her
to make her deposit

afterthe wedding.

Otheniirise, uh, we have to do
all the paperwork twice.

And there is the community
property thing to consider.

Heh. Yeah, but you, uh....

You see, uh,
we're in a bit of a bind.

Time wise, I mean.

I mean, we could lose this
whole project, right?

Right.

Wait a minute.
I've got an idea.

Why don't you and the
professor get married
right away?

Right away?
Sure.

I know this doctor. We could
rush through the blood test,

we could pull few strings
at city hall,

you could be married
at my house tomorrow.

John.
John, did you hear that?

Uh, yes, yes, I heard.

Mr. Connors.

Here are
two cashier's check.

The professor's for
a hundred thousand dollars,

mine for $50,000.
Start the paperwork.

Sign. The minute Monica
and the professor get married,

she'll come in, she'll sign,
make her deposit

push the whole thing through
full court press. Good idea?

Well, yes. Yes,
I, uh, think that might work.

Is something wrong?

[m]

[CHUCKLES]

There's nothing wrong,
darling.

In fact, lthink
it's a wonderful idea.

Let's get married
right away.

I think I'm gonna cry.

[CHUCKLES]

Me too.

[m]

[m]

[CHUCKLES]

Brilliant.
You were absolutely brilliant.

How shall we set it up?

Set what up?

The phony marriage ceremony.
What else?

Phony marriage ceremony?

Hey, what's wrong with you?
It was your idea.

Why are you acting like
such a dummy all of a sudden?

Oh, oh, Iwas just trying
to remember

who I worked with last time
I did the phony marriage scam.

Oh, well, if you can't
remember, there's a
guy I've used.

I think he still lives
in San Francisco.

Oh, no, no, no,
my guy's right here in LA.

Do I know him?
What's his name?

Bosley.
Reverend John Bosley.

Reverend Bosley?

CHARLIE:
Uh, Kris, l'm afraid you've
got us all a little confused

You want us
to help Thornwood

set up
a phony marriage ceremony?

No, Charlie.

I want us to make Thornwood
think it's a phony ceremony.

But I think
that Thornwood and Monica

should be married for real.

For real?
Are you crazy?

Well, maybe I am,
maybe I'm not.

But let's talk about it.

We just did.
You're crazy.

Am I?

Look, Monica is so crazy
about Thornwood.

She'd probably make him
the world's best wife.

And he would make her
the world's worst husband.

True,

if Monica's father
was anyone but who he is.

JULIE:
Wait a minute.

You're saying

that Papa Joe
would keep Thornwood in line?

Well, since you've met
Papa Joe and we haven't

you'd have to be
the one to answer that.

You know, it's a very
interesting premise.

BOSLEY:
Now, you wait a minute.

Are you saying that Papa Joe
could keep Thornwood in line?

Well, let's put it this way.

lf Thornwood made Monica
anything but happy,

he would really,
really regret it.

it seems to me,
Angels, the question is

which could hurt her
the rest of her life

or would we be kinder
constructing a lie

that might make her
delirious/y happy

the rest of her life?

[m]

KRIS:
Are you sure this is the
church Monica said she called?

Right. She talked
to a Reverend Benedictine.

And you're sure she's never
seen or met this Reverend?

Positive. Whoever
shows up at the wedding

saying he's Reverend
Benedictine she'll
believe him.

Sounds good.

The only thing Monica
seems worried about

is me meeting her father.

Yeah, well,

the less you see the family,
the easier this
will come down.

We don't wanna delay
the ceremony.

That's Reverend Benedictine?

KRIS:
Must be.

So we grab him
and your fellow Bosley

shows up at your apartment
for the ceremony, right?

Right.
All you have to do

is pretend that Bosley
is Reverend Benedictine

and nobody will be the wiser.

[m]

Whoo.

Are you
Reverend Benedictine?

lam.

Good.
We've got the right man.

Bless me, child.

Sorry, Reverend.
Now, I want you to get up

and walk into that building
with me.

My child,
why are you doing this?

No time to explain,
Reverend. Walk.

Inside,
Reverend.

Please, I have
a wedding to perform.

Uh-huh,
that's been taken care of.

Inside.

May the Lord forgive you
for you know not what you do.

[SIGHS]

[EXHALES]

[SIGHS]

You don't mess around,
do you?

Come on. You have to get
dressed for your wedding.

[CAR ENGINE STARTS]

[BOTH CHUCKLE]

Monica doesn't suspect
anything?

She's brimming with joy.

How did it go with Bosley?
JULIE: Good.

Now, so Thornwood won't know
who Monica's father is

until
the last possible moment.

We're gonna go and do our
little delaying tactics
with Papa Joe.

Okay.

Make sure Papa Joe gets here
just a little before noon.

KELLY:
By then, things will be
mo ving so fast,

Thorn wood won't have
time to think

Got you.

Bye.

[m]

Well, how do I look?

You look beautiful.

Oh,
you shouldn't do that.

Do what?
You shouldn't lie.

I'm not lying.
All brides are beautiful.

Didn't you know that?

On a good day,
I'm ordinary.

[CHUCKLES]

Kelly, I don't know exactly
why John wants to marry me.

Well, if at first he seems
a little uneasy or scared,

don't let it bother you.

Kelly,

whatever it takes to make him
happy, that's what I'll do.

I know he's not perfect.

I know he's probably not
quite what he appears to be,

but none of us really are.
It doesn't matter.

Because I've got enough love
for both of us.

Monica,
you're a very wise lady.

I've got my first love
and my first friend.

I'm very lucky to know you,
Kelly.

Well,
I'm pretty lucky myself.

[CHUCKLES]

[m]

Put them away.

JULIE:
Mr. Fenell, what happened?

I got enemies.

What are you doing here?

I was coming here
to see you.

About what?
Business.

But I see you're all
dressed up to go out.

Yeah,
to my daughter's wedding.

Now I have no wheels
to get there.

Oh! I'll tell you what.

We'll give you a ride
to your daughter's wedding.

Uh, you can call a garage,

get your limo fixed and
have it driven to her place

and then pick it up
after the ceremony.

That's very nice of you.

No problem.
I love weddings anyway.

Oh, leave the keys
in the ignition.

I've got a phone in here,

you can call the garage
on the way.

That's a very nice lady
you've got there.

Oh, she's a peach.

[CHUCKLES]

[m]

My, don't you look handsome,
Professor Thornwood?

Have you met
Reverend Benedictine?

No. No,
I haven't.

Here he is.
Yes.

Here's
the nervous groom.

Ah, Professor Thornwood.

Reverend.

[CLEARS THROAT]

[DOOR BELL RINGS]

Excuse me.

You look like you're about
ready to choke on that collar.

[CLEARS THROAT]

Hello.
Hi.

This is Mr. Fenell,
the bride's father.

How do you do?
How do you do?

Well, we have a very nervous
bride in there

and a very anxious groom
out here.

So, what say
we get them hitched

before one of them
has a nervous collapse?

[ALL LAUGH]

Professor, this is
Monica's father, Joe.

And, Joe, this is the man
your little girl's
gonna marry.

Uh, pleased to meet you,
sir.

Nice to meet you.

Heh, uh, you, uh,
look familiar to me, Joe,

uh, like, uh,

uh, maybe I've seen you
someplace before.

I don't think so.

Uh, the newspaper maybe.

I don't think so.

KELLY:
Shall we get the bride, Joe?

[CHUCKLES]

KELLY:
Uh, everybody into position.

Hey,

have you seen
her old man before?

I don't believe I've ever
seen him in my parish.

Padsh?
You're a laugh a minute.

[m]

And I now pronounce you
man and wife.

You may kiss the bride.

[m]

Bosley,
where is she going?

Uh, uh,
what did you say?

I said where is she going?
No, no, no, I mean,

what did you call me?
Bosley?

Yeah. So?
My name is Benedictine.

Reverend Benedictine,
remember?

Now, look, Bosley,

we don't have to keep up
a scam anymore.

I don't know
what's wrong

or why are you saying
these things

but I assure you,
I am Reverend Benedictine.

[CHUCKLES]

[CHUCKLES]

[m]

There.

[TIRE SCREECHES]

Bos,
where are you going?

I know a shortcut
to the bank.

Assuming Thornwood
is going to the bank.

Oh, he's definitely
going to the bank.

There.

Well, I think it's time
we phoned our clients.

What do you mean the
corporation's been dissolved?

I mean it's been dissolved.

Miss Munroe withdrew
the hundred and fifty thousand

you and she deposited.

When?
About an hour ago.

[m]

[m]

[SIGHS]

Professor.

I don't know
what you're up to

running out
on my little girl's wedding.

Personally,
you look like a pansy to me,

but she's chosen you
as her husband.

So whatever it is that makes
you go flying around

like a spastic spider,

put it out of your mind.

Say, uh,
aren't you Joe Fenell?

Mr. Fenell to you.

Are you listening to
what I'm saying?

Uh, yes, yes, Mr. Fenell,
I'm listening. I'm listening.

Because unless you keep
my little girl smiling

for the next 50 years or so,

I'm gonna come down
on you

real hard. You understand?

Put him in the car.
But don't bruise him.

He's got a long night
ahead of him.

MAN:
Let's go.

[m]

Well, it's not a marriage
made in heaven,

but it will do.

[ALL LAUGH]

[WHIMPERING]

Why are you crying?

You got back
your hundred thousand dollars.

Because
I wanted to marry John.

[SIGHS]

[m]