All language subtitles for Whered.You.Go.Bernadette.2019.720p.BluRay.x264-DRONES-HI

BEE: Have you ever heard that the brain

is like a discounting mechanism?

Say someone gives you a present

and it's a diamond necklace

and you open it and you love it.

You're all happy at first
and then the next day

it still makes you happy
but a little bit less so.

A year later, you see the necklace

and you think, "Oh, that old thing."

And do you know why your brain
discounts things?

It's for survival.

You need to be prepared
for new expen'ences

because they could signal danger.

Wouldn't it be great
if we could reset that

since there aren't a lot
of saber-toothed tigers

jumping out at us?

Seems like a design flaw

that our brain's
default settings signal danger

and survival instead of something like joy.

I think that's what happened to my mom.

She got so focused
on picking up danger signals

that her discounting mechanism
forgot to see

all the good stuff in her life.

And maybe Dad had quit seeing

the diamond necklace side of Mom.

(WATER DRIPPING)

BERNADETTE: Do you have any idea
how strong I'm being?

How much my heart is breaking

'cause you want to go off
to boarding school?

BEE: If you didn't want me
to go away to boarding school,

you shouldn't have made it
sound like so much fun.

Ugh, yeah, right. So it's my fault.

ELGIE: It's not loading
my workout. Got it.

Do you guys remember when you told me

if I got perfect grades all
the way through middle school

I could have anything I wanted

as a graduation present?

D-Did we say that?

I think it was to ward off
any further talk of a pony.

BEE: Well, that's what
I wanted when I was little.

Now I want something completely different.

You wanna know what it is?

I don't know. Do we?

(SIGHS) Does it entail leaving the house?

A family trip to Antarctica!

We have to go over Christmas break.

As in a month?

Oh, yeah. Obviously,
'cause it's their summer.

It's about the only time you could go.

Yeah, 'cause ponies are cute

and maybe not as much trouble
as we thought.

What do you say there, Mom?

Isn't this a bad time

for you because of work?

We're studying Antarctica in school.

I've read all the explorers' journals,

and I'm doing my final
presentation on Shackleton.

And now is a good time to go

before another ice sheet collapses
and the whole thing melts.

Oh, my God. I can't believe

neither of you are saying no.

I'm waiting for you. You hate traveling.

I w-was waiting for you. You have to work.

Oh, my God. That's a yes. We're going!

Wait, wait. Is that really a yes?

I guess it is.

(CHUCKLES) On a technicality.

BEE: I read once dolphins operate

in this complicated social order

with alliances and enemies
and enforcers, recruiters.

Almost like the Mafia,
or maybe high school.

They even battle sometimes,

where they bash each other over the heads

with their tails.

Why do all the smart creatures
organize themselves

in these weird social structures?

Audrey does everything at Galer Street.

She created the Diversity Council.

She set up Marathon Kids.
She invented Donuts for Dads.

Mom once signed up to be
the kindergarten room parent,

but I think she got bashed over the head

by the other dolphins.

Another option is a few pigs.

Pigs? Really/.7 - Yeah.

In a week, they'll pull out
these blackberries by the root

and then some.

BERNADETTE: Can I help you with something?

Oh, hi, Bernadette.

Um, I didn't know you were home.

Apparently.

AUDREY: Yeah. Um...

I hope you don't mind, I called Tom.

He's a blackberry abatement specialist.

- Oh.
- I was in my garden

cutting back the perennials

and planting some winter color

in preparation for the, uh,

the Galer Street brunch that I'm hosting

for the prospective parents.

Have you been reading the emails?

Not if I can help it.

Yeah. Well, the blackberry vines
are coming under the wall.

Not at all uncommon around here.

They get into the root system like bamboo,

- super invasive.
- Yeah. Invasive.

We're just trying to figure out
what best to do about it.

Yeah, here.

It's Tom.

Bemadetle Fox.

No card.

Oh.

I was in my compost pile one morning,

and I was practically attacked.

Urn, you know, not just in my compost,

but, you know, it's gotten
into my raised vegetable beds,

my greenhouse, which you saw,
even my worm bins.

TOM: Yeah, I mean, to get rid of
this many, with this kind of slope...

Oh, and I don't want
to use anything toxic.

You know, no weed killers
or anything like that.

Right. And if you
don't wanna use the pigs,

I think I'd wanna go with, uh,

CXJ Hillside Side-Arm Thrasher.

I don't have one myself.
I'd have to rent one.

Okay, I'm happy to use Tom here

to remove all things blackberry.

I think we're done.

Nice to meet you, ma'am.

Thank you. And soon?

BERNADETTE: Any pigs will be
arrested for trespassing.

- (BOTH CHUCKLE)
- Jeez.

Dear Manjula,

something unexpected has come up,

and I would love it
if you would work extra hours.

I don't know what time it is
right now in India, but please

uh, let me know ASAP if you're available

because I need you
to work your Hindu magic

on a huge project. Period.

Okay, I'll stop being coy.

(SIGHS HEAVILY) It's a total disaster.

Apparently, Elgie and I have promised Bee

a family trip to Antarctica.

And of the million reasons
I don't want to go,

the main one is it will require me

to be surrounded by people.

Looks like even the smallest

cruise ship has 150 other passengers

which translates into me

being trapped with 147 other humans

who will uniquely annoy the hell out of me

with their rudeness, waste,

incessant yammering,
and boring small talk,

and creepy food requests.

Or worse, they'll turn
their curiosity toward me

and expect pleasantry in return.

Oh, I'm getting a panic attack
just thinking about it.

But a little...

social anxiety

never hurt anyone, am I right?

If I give you the contact info,

could you pretty please take over

the paperwork, visas, plane tickets,

and everything involved
with getting we three

from Seattle to the White Continent?

Question mark.

Uh, and we'll need whatever's on

the recommended packing list.

Uh... just use the same credit card.

Oh, yes, Manjula,
one very important thing.

I'd like a fishing vest.

You know, one replete
with the zippered pockets.

And apparently, I need some

blackberry bushes in my yard removed.

(SCOFFS) The sooner the better.

Audrey, next door, thinks nothing

of traipsing through my yard.

Who does that! Exclamation point.

(DOG BARKING) Ice Cream?

(DOOR RATTLING)

Ice Cream?

(ICE CREAM CONTINUES BARKING)

- Oh.
- (ICE CREAM WHINING)

Ice Cream.

(ICE CREAM CONTINUES WHINING)

How did you get in there?

(PHONE R' RNGIN - OH! G)

This is really inconvenient, Ice Cream.

(GRUNTS)

- You wait there!
- (ICE CREAM WHINES)

(STUDENTS CHATTERING)

Ta-da!

AUDREY: Oh. Um...

(CHUCKLES)

As much as I love

clip art hand prints...

- MINDY: Uh-huh.
- I think we need

to try to find an image

that better articulates success.

- Mm-hmm.
- Like, um,

- a coat of arms...
- Ooh.

With something in it.

- Like a calculator.
- Oh, that's good.

Right? Or, or diplomas.
Like a rainbow of diplomas.

Cute.

Maybe there's a sketch of a brain,

and it has a cap and gown on, right?

We, we just have to remember
we're trying to attract

the right kind of kindergarten families.

- Okay.
- AU DREY: Thanks, Mindy.

Kyle! Kyle!

What? Not now.

Oh.

Yeah, I think they're going
to do homework.

(GASPS) The brunch RSVPs are pouring in.

There has not been one no yet.

- Really?
- Yes, and I'm counting on you

to bring those 12 chairs.

Well, I hope I can find the time.

Yeah, it's chairs. You'll find time.

Yeah.

Oh. Did you notice
our first lady of France

has her scarf look going?

I can't wait until she finds out
about my new job.

I seriously doubt she even knows
who you are. (CHUCKLES)

I know.

She's so awful.

- Oh, hi, honey.
- Hi, Lincoln.

Hey, Mom.

We are on a rescue mission.

What?

Ice Cream's stuck in the confessional.

Oh. I almost forgot. Bernadette!

Bernadette.

(SIGHS)

Incoming gnat. What do we do?

Ice Cream needs us. Punch it.

Bernadette. Oh!

(YELLS) Oh!

Oh, my... Oh.

- SOO-LIN: What happened?
- Did you see that?

- No.
- Did you see that?

- Oh, my God.
- Oh, my... Are you okay?

- Oh, God.
- Are you... What happened?

Are you okafl - I'm crying.

- Oh, God.
- I'm not all right!

Okay. Oh, my God.

(SCREAMING) Ow! Oh!

Did you... Did she run over it?

Did she? Did you see?

- No.
- She ran over my foot.

Okay, you hold it.

No way. She's my dog.

You hold the ladder. I'll go up.

Absolutely not, Bala.

It's too dangerous.

- (ICE CREAM BARKS)
- Oh, shush, it's me.

- Such a drama queen.
- BEE: Mom!

Mom, are you okay?

- (THUDDING)
- (BERNADETTE GRUNTING)

(ICE CREAM WHINING)

- Oh!
- All right, Mom!

- Bee!
- Are you okay.'

Ice Cream.

Hi.

You're the worst dog ever.

- (BERNADETTE PANTS)
- Hey, you okay?

Yeah. Oh.

This came for you.

(BERNADETTE EXHALES)

Congratulations.

(BOTH CHUCKLE)

BEE: I can't believe it.

BERNADETTE: Oh, you feel
the Microsoft motivation.

BEE: Let's synchronize our watches.

Is that Lincoln's mom?

BERNADETTE: In Seattle,
all roads lead to Microsoft.

BEE (WHISPERING): Mom,

look what she's watching.

(MOCKINGLY) Indoctrination in progress.

ELGIE (ON MONITOR): So thanks
to ongoing developments

in neural imaging, TEDsters.

Say hello to Samantha 2.

(CLEARS THROAT)

(MUFFLED LAUGHTER)

MAN 1: That's real.

MAN 2: Wow. That's amazing.

(CHEERING AND APPLAUSE)

Yeah. That did that.

All right, thank you.

I know there's at least two
different species of penguins.

There are seven different species

of penguins in Antarctica.

400,000 emperor penguins alone,

not including gentoos and chinstraps.

BERNADETTE: You wanna know
the coolest part?

On the boat we're taking,

there's no assigned seating
in the dining room.

And they have these tables for four,

which means the three of us can sit down

and if we pile the extra chair
with our hats and gloves,

nobody can sit with us.

And penguins.

Wildly excited about those penguins.

Okay, lwish I could hear more
about the penguins

continue this celebration dinner,

but I've got
a video conference with Taipei,

all these people waiting for me, so...

That's okay, Dad. The clock is ticking.

Congratulations, Choatie.

Bye, honey.

BEE: Morn says insomnia causes anxiety,

and anxiety causes insomnia.

She can't sleep, but she won't
take anything for it

because then
she doesn't feel like herself.

She says that should actually
be a selling point,

but she's grown accustomed
to the way she is.

Me too.

I love Mom just the way she is.

(SOFTLY) Manjula, did you have any idea

that getting to Antarctica
requires crossing

the Drake Passage?

And did you know that the Drake Passage

is the most turbulent body of water

on the entire planet?

Well, I know 'cause I just spent

the last three hours on the Internet.

Here's the thing. Do you get seasick?

It's not just nausea.

It's nausea plus losing the will to live.

Ugh, if it weren't for Bee,
I'd certainly cancel the trip.

But I can't let her down. (SIGHS)

Could you please get me something

really strong for seasickness?

And I don't mean Dramamine. I mean strong!

BEE: Morn might hate Seattle,

but she loves the downtown library.

I mean, yeah, of course,
the books and all that,

but also the Rem Koolhaas design.

She says it makes her heart race.

The good kind of heart racing though.

WOMAN: Excuse me.

Excuse me. Uh... Bernadette Fox?

Yes?

Oh, my gosh. I knew it.

Uh, I was an architecture student at USC,

and I visited Beeber Bifocal

every time they opened it to the public.

Uh, Paul Jellinek was my professor.

Uh, you know, I can't believe this.

I was literallyjust watching

that, uh, video essay on you
two nights ago.

Video essaw.

Yeah, about the Twenty Mile House.

The twentieth anniversary.

I learned so much more about you,

and I thought I knew everything.

How wonderful.

Um, could I get a picture with you?

What a profile pic that would be.

(CHUCKLES)

That's okay.

Uh, you have given me so much already.

I mean, the relationship
has been totally one-way,

and here I am, wanting more.
I'm very sorry.

Just, thank you. You have been
such an inspiration.

(EXHALES)

(INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING ON SPEAKERS)

FEMALE NARRATOR: The Architects
and Builders Association

of America recently poi/ed

300 architectural graduate students

and asked them which
architects they admire most.

The list is what most would expect.

But tucked amongst
the Frank Lloyd Wrights,

Mies van der Rohes.

Frank Gehrys, and Lorenzo Pianos

is a woman who is virtually unknown.

Bernadette Fox, one of
architecture's true enigmas.

Is extraordinary for many reasons.

She was a young woman practicing solo

in a male-dominated profession.

The youngest architect ever
to win a MacArthur grant.

Her handmade furniture stands
in the permanent collection

of the American Folk Art Museum.

She's considered a pioneer
of the green building movement.

She dropped out of
architecture 20 years ago,

and has designed nothing since.

Alone, any of these attributes

would make an architect noteworthy.

Taken together, an icon was born.

I guess what struck us about Bernadette

was the joy that she took in tasks

that other students
would find beneath them.

NARRATOR: Fox was the most
junior member of a group

assigned to the Team Disney
Building in Burbank.

Her first job was typical grunt work,

laying out bathrooms
in the executive wing.

I mean, she wanted to know
how often the executives

went to meetings, at what time of day,

the ratio of men to women.

I finally asked her,
"What the hell are you doing?"

And she said,
"I need to know what problems"

"I'm solving with my design."

You know, I would like to say
that I recognized

the talent that would emerge.

Although I did like the sweater

that she knitted for me.

I actually, I-| still have it.

Here, look.

Look at this.

Pretty interesting.

My wife wanted me to give it
to Goodwill, but I said,

"Mm-mm. I'm keeping it."

NARRATOR: Soon after, Fox met

Elgin Branch, a computer animator.

They married the next year,

and Fox wanted to build a house.

Bernadette was really fixated
on finding a piece of land

where she could design something herself.

And I showed them an abandoned factory,

and Bernadette looked around and said,

"Oh, my God, this is perfect."

She was actually talking
about the building.

NARRATOR: Transforming this
industrial space into a home

consumed the next two years of Fox's life.

She did something akin to a miracle

with this very grim and dark space.

She found a way to make...

Well, she found a way
to fill it with light.

DAVID WALKER: I remember
Bernadette had this idea

to knit together bifocal frames.

It was like, you know,

chain mail with glasses embedded in it.

JELLINEK: The house is very feminine.

You walk into it,

you're absolutely overwhelmed

by the patience and the care

that went into making it.

It's like you're walking

into a giant hug.

What Bernadette was doing
was completely outside

of the mainstream, I can tell you that.

NARRATOR: After Fox and her husband moved

into the Beeber Bifocal house,

Fox was restless for another project.

WALKER: Bernadette was gonna
build this house

using only materials
from within a 20-mile radius.

All the materials had
to be sourced locally.

A concrete factory in Gardenia
supplied sand,

which we mixed on site.

For steel, we used
a recycling yard in Glendale.

Anything found in a dump was deemed okay,

even if it originated outside
the 20-mile radius.

Tree service provided wood,
which we milled on site.

NARRATOR: One day, a convoy of trucks

pulled into the adjacent lot.

The property had been purchased
by Nigel Mills-Murray,

the TV magnate from England,

best known for his smash game show...

You Catch It, You Keep It!

(TRACTOR ENGINE STARTS)

AUDREY: No, no, no, no, no.

Excuse me. Excuse me.

Yeah. I said I need you to focus

on the bushes in the front.

(CONVERSING INDISTINCTLY)

I need a sign

made and installed

on the western side of my property

facing the neighbor's house.

Make it eight feet wide by five feet high.

Yep, you bet your bindi
that's how big I want it.

Bright yellow with the lettering in black.

And it should read, "Private property",

"no trespassing.

"Galer Street gnats
will be arrested and hauled off

to gnatjail."

And that's G-N-A-T.

Something annoying but
not worth being bothered over.

Oh, and put the "gnat" part in red.

Oh.

(GASPS) I absolutely love the vest!

Exclamation point.

Good job, Manjula.

(TABLET CHIMES)

(GROANS)

(SIGHS)

Hey, you ready, Pablo?

Yes. And I asked Soo-Lin to
join us. She's the new admin.

Oh, good. Hey. We've been
dying here without you.

It's nice to meet you, Soo-Lin.

Well, actually, my son is,

um, in your daughter's class
at Galer Street.

Oh, right. Okay. Sorry, I...

- No. (CHUCKLES)
- Cool.

Okay. Yeah.

- Do you guys wanna take the shuttle?
- Yeah.

- Let's take the shuttle.
- Yeah.

- All right.
- Sure.

Let's shuttle it.

(WHISPERS) I don't remember anything.

Can I help you?

Oh. You have a Chihuly.

Chihuly.?

Yeah. No, the chandelier.

It's by Dale Chihuly.

You know, the glass guy.

Oh.

I was gonna say we don't have

anything under that name.

Try Bernadette Fox.

(CLEARS THROAT)

One moment.

(WHISPERS) Miss Fox is here.

Looks like this is a two-man job.

Miss Fox,

are you aware
your prescription is for ABHR?

Mm-hmm.

ABHR is basically Haldol

with some Benadryl, Reglan,
and Ativan thrown in.

Sounds good to me.

Haldol is an antipsychotic.

It was used in the Soviet prison system

to break prisoners' wills.

Yeah, I'm only discovering it now.

It has some serious side effects.

Tardive dyskinesia being the worst.

Tardive dyskinesia is characterized by

uncontrollable grimacing,
tongue protrusion,

lip smacking.

I guess a couple of hours
of that sounds like

a day at the beach
compared to seasickness.

Tardive dyskinesia can last forever.

Forever?

That's... that's a spell.

MAN: The likelihood of tardive dyskinesia
is about four percent.

That increases to ten percent
in older women.

Of course it does.

So I spoke to your regular doctor.

He wrote you a prescription

for a scopolamine patch
for motion sickness

and Xanax for anxiety.

No, I think I might have
some Xanax at home.

D-Do you have, um,

a... some kind of laminated chart,

you know, that shows what all
the little pills look like?

It's just that I poured
all of my prescriptions

into this antique jellyjar.

I mean, the colors and shapes
are amazing together.

But then of course I realized that they...

Well, you get it.

Right.

Fine.

Just give me the Xanax
and the patch thingy.

(SNORING)

(SOFTLY) Bernadette.

Bernadette.

Hey.

Um, what are you doing?

BERNADETTE: Elgie.

Oh, they wouldn't give me... Haldol,

so I had to wait for Xanax.

What are you wearing?
BERNADETTE: Uh?

Oh, this.

Yeah. Got it off the Internet.

Can you sit up, please?

Oh.

(BERNADETTE CLEARS THROAT)

You know, I've got a lunch right now.

- Mm-hmm.
- Do I need to cancel it?

- Oh, God, no! No!
- No?

I just didn't sleep very well last night,

so I just dozed off.

Go. Do. Be.

ELGIE: Okay.

I'll see you at home later.

Hey, do you want to go for dinner tonight?

Okay. Yeah. Yeah.
Buzz and I will pick a place.

Hey, how about just me and you?

- Yeah.
- (CHUCKLES) Okay.

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

- Hey, Mom.
- Hey, Buzzy.

Audrey asked me to give you this.

It's an emergency room bill.

Ran over her foot?

I know. If you look down there,

they didn't actually find
anything broken, so...

Obviously. 'Cause it didn't happen.

(SIGHS)

- (PLAYING FLUTE)
- Wait a second.

That's not yourflute.

It's a Shakuhachi.

Mr. Hayes lent it to me
for World Celebration Day.

Oh, you're performing?

Not exactly. I'm accompanying
the first graders.

- (UH-HUH.
- THE)/re singing for their parents,

and Mr. Hayes got me to put together

a little elephant dance for them.

Elephant dance? You little rotter.

You've, you've choreographed
a dance for the first graders?

That's a big deal, Bee.

Can I come?

No, you wouldn't like it.

The words are way too cute.

You might die of cuteness.

Yeah, well, I wanna die of cuteness.

It's my favorite thing to die of cuteness.

Can I go to Kennedy's house tonight?

Will her mother be there?

No.

Okay. That's okay then.

So about this afternoon...

Oh, yeah. Was that one
of the gnats you were with?

From Galer Street?

Soo-Lin is my new admin and apparently

she does have a son in Bee's class. Yeah.

(SCOFFS) Oh, boy.

- What?
- (SIGHS DEEPLY)

It's all over for me.

What is all over?

(SIGHS) Oh, just watch.

I mean, that one will turn you against me.

(CHUCKLING) Oh, come on.

Audrey and her flying monkeys
have always hated me.

Oh, don't be ridiculous.
Nobody hates you, Bernadette.

(SIGHS)

I'm sorry. What were you saying?

I was curious about the medicine

that they wouldn't fill
for you at the pharmacy.

Oh, I know.

This doctor wrote me a prescription.

It turned out to be Haldol.

Ugh.

I had no idea.

Is that for sleep?

Sleep? What's that?

(SIGHS IN EXASPERATION)

Honey, that's no good.

And how'd you get the prescription?

Are you seeing a psychiatrist?

No.

Do you wanna see a psychiatrist?

God, no.

No.

I'm just anxious about the trip.

Really? What specifically
are you anxious about?

(EXHALES HEAVILY)

Uh, the Drake Passage, people,

little towels folded into animal shapes

that might be left on our beds.

- You know how it is.
- Actually, I don't think I do.

Elgie, there's gonna be a lot of people.

You know...

I'm not good when exposed to people.

Yeah.

I don't know. I think maybe
we need to revisit this idea

of finding someone for you to talk to.

I'm talking to you, aren't I?

(SLURPING)

- (MUSIC PLAYING ON STEREO)
- (BEE AND BERNADETTE SINGING)

♪ I'm walking too far ahead ♪

♪ You're calling to me ♪

♪ I can't hear what you've said ♪

♪ Then you say... "Go slow" ♪

♪ fall behind ♪

♪ The second hand unwinds ♪

♪ if you're lost, you can look ♪
♪ and you will find me ♪

♪ Time after time ♪

♪ if you fall 1 will catch you ♪

♪ ll! Be waiting ♪

♪ Time after time ♪

♪ If you're lost you can look ♪

♪ And you will find me ♪

♪ Time after time ♪

♪ if you fall 1 will catch you ♪

♪ I will be waiting time after... ♪

Oh, Bee.

(SONG CONTINUES PLAYING)

See?

Morn, this is why I don't want you

to come to the elephant dance.

(CHUCKLES, SNIFFLES)

Yeah. (SNIFFIES)

I just need you to know how
hard it is for me sometimes.

What's hard?

(SIGHS)

The banality of life.

But I retain the right
to be incredibly moved

by those little things no one notices.

(EXHALES) For better and worse.

It's not gonna stop me
taking you to the South Pole.

(SIGHS)

(CHUCKLING) We're not going
to the South Pole, Morn.

- We're not?
- No!

The only place tourists go
is the Antarctic Peninsula.

Only researchers and scientists go

as far as the South Pole.

- Oh.
- Please tell me you knew that

and you just forgot because you're tired.

Yeah, tired.

And ignorant.

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

I'll take some more.

AUDREY: Lisa! Will you excuse me?

Oh!

I'm so glad you came.

- Audrey! It's fabulous.
- Hi!

Thank you so much for coming. Hi, Gan/I.

- GARY: Hi.
- There's food. There's drink.

You probably know everybody here.

- Fabulous.
- (LAUGHS) Okay.

Did you know that one
of our first-grade dads

is in Pearl Jam?

- Eddie?
- No.

The point is I just started

and all of a sudden it's my responsibility

to make sure everything runs
smoothly while he's off-grid?

That's Jeff Bezos' brother-in-law.

- Really, 7 (GASPS SOFTLY)
- Yeah.

I'm starting to see
a lot of empty glasses.

Crusts and stuff.

(SIGHS)

Kyle has been such a big help.

Would you guys mind moving
to the other side of the room?

Right in here. I'm so sorry. Yes.

I thought here would be nice.
It's kind of like a little...

- Okay.
- MR. HAYES: Let's all face out.

- AU DREY: Come on in.
- MR. HAYES: All right.

(MUSIC PLAYING)

One, two, three, four.

(CHILDREN SINGING IN SWAHILI)

I love this song. Is it African?

- Yeah, it's a Kenyan pop song.
- Oh.

Galer Street's mission statement

is based on global connectitude.

- Connectitude? Wow.
- Mm-hmm.

Galer Street doesn't just
think outside the box.

They think outside the dictionary.

(CHUCKLES)

(CHILDREN CONTINUE SINGING)

(MR. HAYES SINGING ALONG)

(ALL SCREAMING)

(AUDREY GASPING)

MAN: Find Susie!

MR. HAYES: Get on the bus.
It's okay. We're all okay.

AUDREY: I'm so sorry.

Thank you for coming!

It's the rains, you see. The rains here...

Do you wanna take a gift bag?
There you go.

Oh, no!

Your hillside just slid into my home.

During my brunch.

There were children in there!

Shit.

(STAMMERS) W-Was anyone hurt?

Miraculously, no.

(SIGHS) Okay, that's good. That's...

Good? Good?

My house is knee-deep in mud, Bernadette.

The brick wall collapsed.

My yard.

My Japanese maples.

The birdbath is practically
in my living room.

I am so sorry. I...

And that sign.

- (SIGHS) The sign.
- What sign?

I'll have it taken down today.

Oh, well, the mudslide
took care of that for you.

It's on display now for everyone to see!

- Mom, what sign?
- Oh, Bee,

I did something really stupid.
Stay in the car.

What kind of person puts up a sign...

Look, I will pay for everything.

(MONEY.) That's what you think
this is about? Money?

- Mom, what is going on?
- BERNADETTE: Bee...

Tell her! Tell her what's going on!

- You're obviously emotional.
- Yes, I am!

But you need to remember

that the work I had done on the hillside

- was at your insistence.
- Oh!

Audrey, I used your guy,
and I had him do it

on the day you specified, so...

So none of this is your responsibility.'

No, I am simply making the point

that there's a larger context
to what happened today.

Wow. Okay.

So you think putting up
a hateful billboard

is an appropriate reaction
to having yard work done.

BERNADETTE: No.

I think I'm starting
to understand all of this.

Audrey, don't stand there and pretend

you haven't been playing this game too.

Bernadette, j-just get out
once in a while.

B-Be in the real world
and interact with people.

Maybe that would make you not so paranoid.

- I think we're done here.
- No, we are not done.

We are not, we are not done here.

Again, I want to apologize for the sign.

It was a little inappropriate.

And I intend to take
full responsibility, okay.'

In terms of the Galer Street School,

- in terms of money.
- So now you care about...

You don't care about Galer Street.

You don't care about anything.

You don't care about your house.

You don't care about your yard.

You certainly don't care
about this neighborhood.

(BERNADETTE SCOFFS)

Do you know that within a four-mile radius

is the house my grandmother grew up in,

the house my mother grew up in,

and the house that I grew up in?

That I believe.

And you come in here
with your Microsoft money

and buy this 9,000-square-foot teardown

in the middle
of this charming neighborhood

and you think
that's gonna make you belong?

Well, you don't belong, Bernadette,

and you never will.

Say amen to that.

(GRUNTS, BREATHING HEAVILY)

None of the other mothers
like you, Bernadette.

Did you know that?

- Really?
- AU DREY: Yeah!

Did you know a bunch of moms

had a mother-daughter sleepover

and didn't even invite you and Bee?

Okay, that's it, Audrey!

(CAR DOOR OPENS)

Fuck you for bringing Bee into this!

No. Don't you do this. We love Bee.

Bee is a terrific girl.
She-She's a wonderful student.

In fact, it just goes to show
how resilient children are

because she turned out so well.

- (EXHALES)
- If Bee were my daughter,

and I think I speak on behalf

of every mother at Galer Street,

we would never be sending
her off to boarding school.

I want to go to boarding school.

Of course you do, sweetie.

It was my idea!

No, Bee, it's not worth it.

Of course it was your idea.
I don't blame you.

You don't know me.
And you don't know my mom.

Oh, I do. I do know your mom.

I know her now. Everybody does.

You don't even know your own son, Audrey.

If you did, you'd know how
he makes fun of you at school.

Do you even notice
when he comes home stoned?

I agree with my mom.

Fuck you, Audrey.

Hey.

You are super cool, you know that?

Like we'd ever want to be
at a sleepover with them.

(MUMBLES)

Yeah. Popularity is overrated.

(ENGINE STARTS)

(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING)

So we will put these Sharpies next to it

and while the restaurant revolves,

everyone can write something on it

and when it comes back around later,

you'll have a card
full of birthday wishes.

BEE: That's so cool, Kennedy.

I heard if you go to the bathroom,

when you come back
you can't find your table.

Let's go to the bathroom.

- Oh, hey, Kennedy.
- KENNEDY: Hi.

Bee.

BERNADETTE: Oh, hey.

Denver trip got canceled?

Nope. I'm on my way to the airport.

I just, uh, stopped to ask you something.

What?

Those blackberries were the only thing

holding up the hillside. You knew that.

I know you know better

than to denude an entire hillside

during the wettest winter on record.

(CHUCKLES) I guess I didn't actually.

How did you find out?

H-How did you think I wouldn't find out?

Let me guess.

Your admin, one of Audreys mean girls,

is pouring poison in your ears.

I called it.

Keep Soo-Lin out of this.

She's the only reason it's even feasible

for me to go away for a month.

- If you're interested in the truth...
- Mm-hmm.

I had those blackberries removed

in accordance with the specifications

of Bugs Meany herself.

Stop turning everything into a joke.

I look at you and I have real concern.

You won't talk to me.
You won't go to a doctor.

- You won't...
- Dad... stop freaking out.

Stop freaking out?
The Griffins' house caved in.

(SIGHS)

Is this, um, something
we're gonna have to pay for?

It's force majeure.
Audrey's insurance covers it.

Why didn't you tell me, Bee?

I... I guess you haven't
been around that much.

Hmm.

Look how far my birthday card is.

Take your Ritalin and shut up.

I'm sorry... Wha... Excu...
what did you just say/.7.

That's not the way that we talk to people.

It's okay.

- That's how they talk to each other.
- No, it's not okay.

Why do you care?

You don't even like Kennedy.

(BERNADETTE CHUCKLES)

He doesn't?

(STAMMERS) No, of cour...

of course I like you, Kennedy.

Wha... How can you say a thing like that?

What is going on
with this family right now?

I just stopped by to have a conversation.

No, you didn't.

You came here to yell at Mom.
Audrey already did that.

- BERNADETTE: Hey...
- You weren't there.

It was horrible.

(SIGHS)

Come on.

What was the question
you wanted to ask me?

Why can't you ever get along
with our neighbors?

Why can't you ever get along with anyone?

It can't always be theirfault.

BERNADETTE: Well, Manjula,

nobody can say I didn't give it

the old college try but I just...

(EXHALES HEAVILY)

I can't go to Antarctica.

Fear not. I have concocted a gutless plan

which should do the trick.

My dentist has been wanting to remove

my wisdom teeth for years.

So, bear with me,

how about we call her up

and get an appointment
right before the trip?

That way, I can claim it was an emergency

and I'm devastated and all that

and my husband and daughter
can go on the trip themselves

and nobody blames me.

(SIGHS) Yep.

Told you it was gutless.

- Send message.
- (TABLET CHIMES)

Bernadette!

Paul Jellinek!

Look at you.

You old rotter. (GASPS)

My God, you haven't changed in 20 years!

- (LAUGHS)
- So good to see you!

- How was the lecture?
- It was fine. Fine.

It was just an excuse to come visit you.

(BOTH LAUGH)

Oh, my goodness. Wow.

(KEYBOARD CLACKING)

(DOOR OPENS)

Elgie, this is Dr. Kurtz.

Oh, hi.

Hi.

- Janelle Kurtz.
- Elgie Branch.

Thank you so much for accommodating us.

We are really glad you could come in.

And Hannah spoke so highly of you

and all the work that you did with Frank

to help him through his rough patch, so...

I'll leave you two.

Okay.

- Um...
- (DOOR OPENS)

(CLICKS TONGUE)

What have you been doing
in Seattle for 20 years?

Well, I guess I just wanted
to leave LA in a snit,

you know, and when I determined

that everyone felt
sufficiently sorry for me,

unfurl my cape and swoop in
to launch my second act

and show those bastards who the true...

bitch goddess of architecture really is.

- (BOTH CHUCKLE)
- But then, yeah...

Elgie ended up loving it here,
and, yeah, here we are.

To my surprise, she got really excited

about moving to Seattle.

We were both from the East Coast,

both went to prep schools.

And she was a rising star.
An absolute force.

Of course, I was taken by her beauty

and her amazing talent

and her humor and her energy.

And at the time that we got married,

I was working on
a computer animation program

which was eventually bought by Microsoft.

And around the same time, uh...

she ran into some trouble
with a house that she built

and abruptly declared herself done

with the LA architecture scene.

The city planners here.

I mean, they never met a beautiful view

they didn't want to block

with a 20-story old folks home

with zero architectural integrity.

And believe me, that is

the first time that
the words "architectural"

and "integrity" have ever
been used together

in a sentence about Seattle.

And whoever laid out this place...

I mean, they never met a two-way street

they didn't suddenly, and for no reason,

want to turn into a one-way street.

They never met a four-way intersection

they didn't want to turn
into a five-way intersection.

Paul, I swear to God, they even have

seven-way intersections up here.

All of the energy that she once channeled

so fearlessly into architecture...

she seems to have turned towards...

fulminating about Seattle

in the form of these wild rants.

BERNADETTE: I bought a house
the second we got here.

(CHUCKLES) It was this crazy
reform school for girls,

you know, with every conceivable
building restriction attached.

I mean, to make something
of it would require

Harry Houdini ingenuity,

which of course appealed to me,

- but... (CLEARS THROAT)
- JELLINEK: Mmm.

What, you know, actually happened

was that I had a series of, uh...

I had four miscarriages and...

'Cause, no, I fully intended to recover

from the ass whooping of Twenty Mile

by making a home for Elgie and me

and the baby I was always pregnant with,

but, you know...

I'd sit on the toilet and look down

and there it was, blood on my underpants.

Oh, my God. I am so sorry, Bernadette.

- No, no, no.
- I just didn't know.

Hey, (CLICKS TONGUE) Bee arrived.

But, you know, her heart, um,

hadn't developed completely

and, you know, it needed to be rebuilt

in a series of, um, operations,

'cause, you know,
her chances for survival,

they were minuscule.

Especially back then.

You'd think that having a sick child

would either bring a husband and wife

closer together or tear them apart.

But in our case, it didn't do either.

We just started... drifting.

The nurses took this.

(CHUCKLES) You know, they do that

when they don't think the...

the babywill...

JELLINEK: Aw, look at her.

Mmm.

When I first saw Bee, I just...

I knew that she was other

and that she'd been entrusted to me.

Do you know those posters of baby Krishna?

- The Balakrishna.
- Right.

The creator and the destroyer,

and he's fat and happy and blue?

Well, that's what Bee was,
the creator and destroyer.

JELLINEK: Oh, yeah.

I mean, come on, it's just obvious. Right?

So I said to the nurses,

"She's not gonna die. She's Balakrishna."

(BOTH CHUCKLE)

And they actually put that name
on the birth certificate.

(LAUGHS)

And, so, yeah, I asked to be left alone

with my daughter.

And, well, Elgie once gave me this locket

of Saint Bernadette.

(STAMMERS) You know...

- She had 18 visions, right?
- JELLINEK: Right.

And he always said the Beeber Bifocal

and Twenty Mile were my first two visions.

And so I leaned in and I said

to my beautiful little blue guppy,

(VOICE BREAKING) I said,
"You are my other 16 visions

all rolled into one."

And she is.

And now, I blinked,

and she's going across the country

to boarding school.

(SIGHS)

She just immersed herself

so thoroughly in Bee's recovery

that it became her every fiber.

And...

I worked longer and longer hours.

Called it a partnership.

I'm surprised to hear that
she isn't in therapy.

That seems like a logical first step.

Mmm. I tried that. Didn't go so well.

I asked her again recently. Um...

Didn't go so well.

You know, what Elgie doesn't know

is that I am still obsessing about LA.

- What do you mean?
- (CLICKS TONGUE)

(SIGHS)

You know, just last night,
right, I woke up to pee.

You know, I'm half asleep.
I'm a blank slate.

And then the data starts reloading.

Bernadette Fox, Twenty Mile House,

destroyed, failure.

You know, it's like failure
has got its teeth in me,

and it won't stop shaking.

And then I accidentally see that cheesebag

Nigel Mills-Murray's name

on one of his dumb TV shows,

and I go nuts inside.

You know, and it just adds to
my bottomless, churning shame

that I have become
so demented and dishonest

that I'm a stranger to the most brilliant,

honorable man I have ever met.

I technically have no idea
what's wrong with Bernadette.

Is she depressed? Manic? Agoraphobic?

Hooked on pills? Paranoid? I don't know.

I really don't even know what constitutes

a mental breakdown,

but what has become crystal clear

is that ignoring it
is no longer an option.

So I'm lying in bed
in the middle of the night

when the thumping arrives.

It's this black hole of visceral panic.

Oh, it was something ridiculous
like, you know,

"I've got to pack more
fresh fruit in Bee's lunch."

(JELLINEK LAUGHS)

And I can feel this irrational anxiety

draining my store of energy

like a batten/operated race car

grinding away in the corner.

There go the dishes.
There goes the grocery store.

There goes exercise.

There goes basic human kindness.

So from what you're saying,

she willfully created an environment

which destroyed a neighbor's home.

She's hoarding prescription medicine.

She ran over a mother at school,

and then had a billboard erected outside

this woman's home to taunt her?

(SIGHS) It seems she may be suffering from

extreme anxiety, grandiosity,

and if hoarding prescription medication

means what I think it means...

she may well be having suicidal thoughts.

(SIGHS)

So what do you saw.

(IN IRISH ACCENT) 'Tis
a piteous fate to have befallen

a MacArthur genius, wouldn't you saw

(JELLINEK CHUCKLES)

You done?

(NORMAL ACCENT) Yeah.

Yeah, good, 'cause I know

you can't honestly believe
any of this nonsense.

As amusing as it is,
it obscures the larger point

which is that people like you must create.

That's what you were brought
into this world

to do, Bernadette.

If you don't, you become
a menace to society.

I think there's one very simple answer

to all of your problems.

Get your ass back to work

and create something.

ELGIE: So let's just divide and conquer

with approximate nearest neighbors

and restrict it to nearby matches.

It's gonna minimize about 90 percent

of the computation time, I think.

PABLO: That's super elegant, man.

Pablo, are you almost done?

Yeah.

- Thanks, Elgie.
- Okay.

Elgie, this is Agent Strang

with the FBI.

- Oh. Hi.
- Hey.

- Hello, Mr. Branch.
- Hi.

I'm the regional director of the
Internet Crime Complaint Center.

IC3.

Working in partnership with the.

Department of Homeland Security.

Wow.

Let's have a seat.

Thank you.

Mr. Branch, you've come to our attention.

I have?

Yep. Because of a charge
on your credit card.

This is my credit card bill?

These are charges to a company called

Delhi Virtual Assistants International.

I see. Yes, I can see.

- Wow.
- STRANG: That company does not exist.

It's a front

for a crime syndicate
working out of Russia.

ELGIE: ReallY?

We've spent the last six months

building a case against them.

We were granted a warrant

which allowed us to access
emails between your wife,

Bernadette Fox,

and one Manjula.

(SMACKS LIPS) There is no Manjula.

This matter is delicate and urgent.

Elgie, we have to call Dr. Kurtz.

(FLUTE PLAYING)

(SINGING) I Elephant, elephant I

I Tell me, who do you love? I

I on, you knowl

I it's my mama that I love I

(MUSIC STOPS)

(AUDIENCE CHEERING AND APPLAUDING)

BEE: Not too long ago, scientists sent

these invisible cosmic rays

through the Great Pyramid of Giza

to see what was inside,

and they found this big empty space

they never even knew about.

They don't know how it was made

or even why this inner chamber exists,

even though the pyramids have been there

for over 4,000 years.

Only use "I feel" statements.

We don't want her to feel judged.

I don't know if I can do this.

I know this can feel uncomfortable...

(SIGHS)

but we all share the same goal,

which is to help Bernadette.

Right. (CLEARS THROAT)

Right.

And she does need help.

SOO-LIN: Absolutely.

RECEPTIONIST: You're canceling
your appointment today?

BERNADETTE: Mmm-hmm. Yep, that's right.

It's a cancellation.

This is very last minute.

I'm sorry. But, look...

(SIGHS) My wisdom teeth
have waited this long,

they can wait another month.

- Would you like to reschedule?
- No, no.

I'll reschedule when we get
back from our trip in January.

- Okay, thank you, Miss Fox.
- Okay, thank you.

I knew I recognized you
from that TED Talk.

(CHUCKLES)

My kids love that.

BERNADETTE: Elgie, w-what's going on?

Is it Bee?

I just saw her at school.

No. Bee is fine.

- (SIGHS)
- How was the dentist?

Um, I, I didn't go.
Sorry, who are these people?

Bernadette, I'm Dr. Janelle Kurtz.

Why don't we all sit down?

Why? Elgie?

Shall we begin, Doctor?

Begin what? I don't like this.

DR. KURTZ: Bernadette,
have a seat, so we can...

We'd like to present to you
the reality of your situation.

Elgie?

Whatever this is, can we talk
about it privately?

I know everything, Bernadette,
and so do they.

Okay, look, if this is about the dentist,

if he told...

I canceled the appointment.

I'm going to Antarctica.

I'm looking forward to it. See?

Bernadette, there is no Manjula.

Manjula? M...

Agent Strang, could you...

Agent?

Hi. From the FBI.

Miss Fox, we've determined
that Manjela or "Manjula"

is an alias for an identity theft ring

operating out of Russia.

Ide... What?

ELGIE: Yeah. And you have given them

all of our personal information.

And not only that, they/re on a plane

right now to Seattle

so they can make their move

while Bee and I are in Antarctica.

Isn't that correct, Agent Strang?

Pretty much.

And they used your airline miles
to buy the tickets.

ELGIE: Yeah, and next they could clean out

our bank accounts
and our brokerage accounts

and our property title
because you have given them

all of our personal information
and passwords.

Manjela, Man-Manjula even asked...

for power of attorney.

No, that's not true.

As a matter of fact, I haven't heard back

from her for days.

I was getting ready to fire her.

Well, that's because the FBI
intercepted the emails

and responded as you.

Wha... (EXHALES)

They know everything!

Bernadette, do you get it?

(BERNADETTE SIGHS)

That was me ending my relationship

with technology.

(GROANS)

That's a great idea, Bernadette.

Let's all just take a deep breath.

BERNADETTE: Oh, God, Elgie,

I am so sorry.

New Delhi Virtual Assistants

had over 100 positive Yelp reviews.

But the reality was
something different entirely

and I would like for us to stay focused

on reality right now.

So it seems in addition
to this identity theft issue,

you also tried to run over
a mother at school.

Oh, don't be ludicrous.

(SCOFFS)

BERNADETTE: Oh, shut up.

What is she doing here anywaY?

Would someone open the window
and let that gnat out?

Stop calling Soo-Lin that, Bernadette.

Oh, forgive me.

Would someone let the admin
out of my living room?

I'm happy to go.

AGENT STRANG: Yeah, how about I go too?

We'll be in the other room.
(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)

Interventions are
slightly above my pay grade.

(SCOFFS) Intervention?

Is that what this is?

I'm sorry, am I the only one here

who thinks that's just
a little bit extreme?

Bernadette, I'm worried
that you are suffering

from adjustment disorder.

(SCOFFS) Adjusting is a disorder?

DR. KURTZ: Adjustment disorder
is a psychological response

brought on by stressors

and usually involves
anxiety or depression.

- (BERNADETTE SCOFFS)
- And in your case,

I think that this... the stressor is

this planned trip to Antarctica.

Yeah. Except that
I really do wanna go now.

Oh, come on.

You have no intention of going.

- We have read the emails.
- Uh... (SIGHS)

DR. KURTZ: Okay, the reality is

that you have willingly given over

your personal information to a criminal.

I didn't know she was a criminal!

This poorjudgment has almost caused

financial ruin and physical harm.

Your aggression toward your neighbor

destroyed her home...

I removed...

Let her finish!

DR. KURTZ: This is not the first time

that something like this has occurred.

And it seems

that you are challenged in the area

of basic human interaction,

relying on a virtual assistant

to schedule all your appointments

and to carry on
all of your household duties.

And, Bernadette, the fact that

you are hoarding prescription medication

and the state of your home to me indicates

a serious depression.

(SIGHS)

Are you still presenting reality to me,

or can I say something?

First, I'd like Elgin to begin
by expressing his love.

- Elgin.
- (SCOFFS)

ELGIN: Yeah. Uh... yeah.

Hey, of course I love you.

I don't know who you are right now.

It's like aliens have come down

and replaced you with a replica.

Honest to God, one night, Bernadette,

I reached over and I felt your elbows,

'cause I thought no matter
how good that replica is,

there's no way that they got
the pointy elbows right.

And I-I had to stop myself.

I thought, "Oh, my God."

"I can't plunge off the cliff with her.

"I've got responsibilities.
I'm a father, I'm a husband.

"I've got all these people at work

"and their families depending on me.

"Bernadette, my Bernadette,
has gone absolutely crazy,

but I cannot be pulled down with her."

I'm really sorry, Elgie.

I don't know how
I'm gonna make this up to you.

You're right. I need help.

Let's start by spending time
together in Antarctica.

You know, just the three of us.

No work, no computers...

Please, let's not blame this on Microsoft.

No. I'm just saying the three of us.

Our family, you know,
without any distractions.

The three of us
are not going to Antarctica.

Oh, we can't cancel the trip.

I'm not canceling the trip.
Lwouldn't do that to Bee.

You're not taking her to Antarctica

without me, are you?

Bernadette, I'd like to suggest

that while Elgin and Bee
are on their trip,

that you and l...

that you and I work together

for a few weeks at Madrona Hill.

(SCOFFS)

The loony bin?

DR. KURTZ: We don't call it that.

BERNADETTE: Jesus Christ!

You're shipping me off to a loony bin!

Elgie, you-you're not!

You need help, Bernadette.

You know, a little R and R.

R and R?

So, what, you guys,

y-you go on the trip

and I get locked up at Madrona Hill?

You, you can't do that.

Ideally, we'd like you
to come voluntarily.

Lock myself up?

Oh, my God. You have no concept

of how ill you actually are!

Elgie, look at me!

Yes, I am in the weeds,
but I can get myself out.

(EXHALES)

We can get out of this together.

We don't need Colonel Kurtz here.

I'm sorry, I've had to pee
since I got here.

Or do I need doctor's permission?

(BREATHING HEAVILY)

You know, she's been in there a while.

Do you think that she's okay?

Maybe we should go and check on her.

Bernadette?

Bernadette!

I can hear the water running.

DR. KURTZ: Miss Fox?

- It's been a while.
- ELGIE: Is she okay.'

- (BANGING ON DOOR)
- DR. KURTZ: Miss Fox?

- Bernadette?
- Miss Fox, can you hear me?

Step aside.

(WATER RUNNING)

(EXHALES HEAVILY)

I need your help, Audrey.

Well, her car is still here.

Everything's so screwed up.

I am really, really sorry

about your house

and the sign.

Don't worry. Nobody will look for me here.

Look, I know I'm not your friend.

I'm nobody's friend, let's face it.

But when I was running from my house,

I thought maybe I could come here.

I have nowhere else to go.

I don't... know anyone in Seattle.

- (FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)
- (KNOCKING ON DOOR)

(EXHALES)

- Hi.
- Audrey.

You'll never guess what happened.

She disappeared. Bernadette.

From an intervention
Elgie and I were just doing.

That crazy bitch jumped out a window.

What?

'Cause Elgie's having to lock her up

to save her from the Russian mafia.

I'll tell you later.

- Oh, my God.
- I know.

That poor man.

He has been through...

so much.

You have no idea.

So we're all out looking for her,

so I told Elgie I'd zip down here

to see if she ran across
your yard or anything.

Are you okay/.7 - Yeah.

Yeah. Sornl, I'm just, um...

The house, you know,
I've just been cleaning a lot.

- Oh, right.
- And I'm just tired.

Mud and all of it.

But, um, but I will, uh,
let you know if I see her

running through the streets

with her arms flapping or something.

- (CHUCKLES)
- It's crazy.

It's crazy. Oh, gosh, let me know.

Come here.

Yeah.

- More details later.
- Okay.

I wanna hear all of 'em.

Nothing?

Well, she didn't just vanish!

We got 'em. I just got word.

Manjula was apprehended
switching planes in Dubrovnik.

This investigation is now closed.

(CHUCKLES) Realm.

What about Bernadette?

She's not in any danger now.

Oh, really/.7.

Well, from the Russians. (LAUGHS)

We've, we've solved that problem.

I have been struggling with Kyle.

A lot.

Itry with him, but...

And he did not get into Lakewood.

So we'll try public school next year.

Well, I'm sure it's nicer
than Madrona Hill.

You know what?
I'll switch places with you.

(CHUCKLES) I'll go to Madrona Hill.

Yeah, you could probably use some R and R.

(BOTH CHUCKLE)

All right. Well, then you stay here

with my video-game-obsessed,
rude, pot-smoking son.

Okay. Well, then you can have
my workaholic husband

and his soon-to-be mistress admin.

Okay, well, only if you throw in Manjula,

aka Sergei, the Russian identity thief.

(BOTH LAUGH)

(GROANS SOFTLY)

The most important thing
for you to understand

is that it's not yourfault.

That wasn't even the question.

Morn disappears into thin air

right before Christmas without telling me?

The truth is complicated, honey.

There's just no way
one person can ever know

everything about another person.

Of course it's complicated.

Just because it's complicated,

just because you think
you can't ever know evewthing

about another person,
it doesn't mean you can't try.

It doesn't mean I can't try.

ELGIE: Ican't...

It's a very complicated thing
that she's going...

What are you doing with that?
Hey, listen to me.

Your mom needs professional help.

Stop, please.

Hey, I know you're upset, Buzzy, but...

Don't call me that.

Morn calls me that, not you.

(INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYING ON SPEAKERS)

FEMALE NARRATOR:
In September of that year,

Fox was awarded a MacArthur genius grant.

REPORTER: So why her?

Bernadette Fox is simply
the most exciting thing

in the world of architecture right now.

I think Bernadette stands out

because no one knows exactly who she is.

Is she an architect? Obviously.

An inspired dumpster diver? Yeah.

REPORTER: Any thoughts
about what you'll do

with your grant money?

I don't know.

Start a new project, finish this one.

You know, I got a lot of ideas.

NARRATOR: Mills-Murray's house,

the White Castle, was ready to move into

before Fox and Walker

had closed the walls
on the Twenty Mile House.

The White Castle's crowning touch was

a million dollars' worth
of California fan palms.

Yeah. Made it look more like
a Ritz-Carlton, if you ask me.

I mean, she complained.
She complained and complained,

but... (INHALES SHARPLY)

That's just how it was.

The You Catch It, You Keep It guy.

Ni... Nigel Miles-Mills

is a douchebag.

Bernadette called me and said
she wanted to list the house

and find another piece of property.

And before I could even get it
on the market,

I got a call from this guy I knew

who's a business manager,

and he just wanted to own the house

that had won the Genius award.

You know, I just wish that you

could have seen the two of them.

He was so proud of her.

She had just won this big award

and made a killing on the house.

You know, what husband wouldn't be proud?

I didn't know it at the time,

but the business manager

was actually buying the house
for his client,

who happened to be...

Nigel Mills-Murra y.

And to this day,

Nigel uses the site for overflow parking.

NARRATOR: The Twenty Mile House,

which had taken three years to complete,

took only a few hours to demolish.

There was an outpouring of
grief in architecture circles

as word spread that
the house had been destroyed.

Bernadette went AWOL.

I, um, had a ton of architects
sign a letter

that got printed in the paper.

And the Landmark Commission got serious

about preserving modern architecture,

which means that, you know,

there was some good that came out of it.

School?

Yeah.

- Are you going to work?
- Yeah.

Mom's missing and you're going to work?

Well, what do you want me to do, Bee?

I don't know, maybe look for her.

Hey, Bee, listen...

Mom will come back

when she is ready to come back.

She's... clearly going through something.

Yeah, she's going through
something you put her through.

Hey, stop it.

Listen to me.

Mom has made her own choices.

Instead of facing reality,
she chose to escape.

And not for the first time.

She escaped from Los Angeles.

She escapes any personal responsibility.

And what did she do yesterday
when confronted with that fact

from people who wanted to help her?

She escaped...

yet again.

Look at me.

We're gonna live our lives

and when she is ready to rejoin us...

she will.

Why do you always set it so high?

(SIGHS)

Bee? Bee?

Um, Miss Griffin, I wanted to tell you

that the only reason
I wanted to go to Choate

was because I saw some dumb documentary

about how it's supposed to be
a really good school...

Sweetheart, sweetheart, is your mom home?

No, whW.

She needed my help.

I drove her to the airport last night.

She said she thought you were

on the same flight to Antarctica.

- You drove her to the airport?
- Yes.

Do you know if she got on the flight?

I don't know, honey. I don't know.

L-I gave her some of my clothes
for the trip.

Thank you. Thank you.

Mom's in Antarctica.

- ELGIE: What?
- Yeah.

Audrey drove her
to the airport last night.

Audrey/.7.

Yeah. She told me.

I really think Mom is gonna be

on the trip we were gonna take.

She'll be on the Allegra,
and I already checked,

there's another ship called the Louisa

that we can take
if we get down there in time.

Both the ships are gonna be at this place

called Port Lockroy on the same day.

We can go down there and find Mom.

You promised.

You have to take me.

And you like the fishing vest too, huh?

(BREATHING HEAVILY)

Oh. (BREATHING HEAVILY)

BEE: Whatever you do, don't ever tell Mom

you're bored.

She'll be like, "Well, guess what?"

"It only gets more boring

"and the sooner you learn it's on you

"to make your own life interesting,

the better offyou'ii be."

I hope she's doing something
interesting n'ght now.

(PENGUINS WARBLING)

CAPTAIN (OVER PA): Many of you
are already on deck relishing

the clear, still moming.

The Zodiacs will begin loading at 9:30.

And, of course, kayaks
are always available.

Welcome to Antarctica.

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

Hang on, ma'am.
Here's your flotation device.

Oh, yes. I should probably
keep one of these on 24/7.

And then you wanna line up
for the kayaking right over there.

- Okay.
- Oh, no, thanks.

Uh...

Wait, do you have singles?

Yeah. Of course we do.

ELGIE: We have every reason to believe

that my wife is on the Allegra.

There was, uh, a misunderstanding

about the departure date and...

A misunderstanding?

Yes, a misunderstanding.

And we want to meet up with her.

BEE: Both ships are supposed to be

at Port Lockroy on the same day.

Look, everything depends
on weather conditions.

So the idea of a scheduled itinerary

with exact port calls doesn't really exist

in the Antarctic.

Can you at least confirm for me

that my wife is on that ship?

I'm sorry.

I can't release any information

on passenger lists.

Dad, it's fine.

It'll be fine. Come on.

(BLOWING)

BECKY: Hello.

Hey, who are you?

Ah. Funny. I was just
wondering that myself.

When you're in a boat in Antarctica

and there's no night,

who are you?

I-I'm thinking I'm a ghost

on a ghost ship in a ghost land.

You really need to be helping me

take phytoplankton samples.

Come on.

I'll take the water samples
and you can write my labels.

Don't worry. I'll show you how.

It doesn't take a genius.

Here. Here.

Dad...

I've come to a decision.

Oh, yeah? What's that?

I don't want to go to Choate anymore.

I've been thinking about it a lot

and I know you and Mom
went to a prep school,

and it sounded fun

living in a dorm
and playing in the orchestra,

being independent and grown up,

but I don't wanna do it. I just...

I don't wanna go.

I only have four years
until I go off to college,

so I figure what's the hurry to go?

Okay, you don't have to do anything

you don't wanna do.

(CHUCKLES) I kinda thought you'd be mad.

P.S., prep school wasn't all that fun.

That's what I thought. (CHUCKLES SOFTLY)

BECKY: A few other researchers
are bunking on the Allegra

en route to Palmer Station,

where we're gonna live
for the next several months.

What's Palmer Station again?

The scientific research center.

Oh, yeah. Yeah. I, I knew that.

That was, uh, that's the southernmost spot

that only scientists can go to.

No, you're thinking
of the South Pole Station,

which is the southernmost spot
on the planet.

Oh.

That's where I'm heading after Palmer.

Actually, my ex-husband is a contractor

and he's working on a proposal
for the dismantling of it.

They're hoping to build a new one,

but I don't know why.

The old one's a geodesic dome.
It's very cool.

What's the new station
gonna be built from?

Who knows?

He's only doing the bid
for tearing it down,

which is appropriate.

You're making sure to put
the station names on there too?

Yeah.

(BELLOWS)

(PENGUINS WARBLING)

CREW MEMBER (ON PA):
And well also have side trips

going to Port Lockroy,

a British military outpost
left over from World War ll.

It is now an Antarctic heritage museum

where, believe it or not,

a couple people actually live

and run a gift shop and a post office.

So you are all encouraged

to go buy Antarctic penguin stamps

and mail letters home.

Can you take me to that ship?

That, that ship over there?

MAN: Only to Port Lockroy
and back on this trip. Sorry.

VIVIAN: All right, everyone,

- come around.
- IRIS: Welcome.

- I'm Vivian.
- I'm Iris.

Uh, don't forget to close
the door behind you because...

VIVIAN: Sneaky little penguins
are likely to get in

and once they are in,

it is really hard to get them out.

Uh...

BOTH: Welcome to Port Lockroy.

VIVIAN: Come on in. Come a bit closer.

During World War II, Port Lockroy was

a secret outpost for the British...

IRIS: Paid to turn Port Lockroy into...

Where are the passengers from the Allegra?

Urn, the other cruise ship
passengers already left.

VIVIAN: Oh, dear.

WOMAN: Dear God, what's wrong with her?

Good morning.

Hey. You're up early.

ReadY?

Yeah.

BECKY: Okay...

So what's the ratio of men to women

overwintering in the South Pole?

BECKY: Uh, I don't know.

I can let you know when I get back.

(PENGUINS WARBLING)

Antarctica sucks.

She's gonna get back to port

and she's not gonna know
that we came for her.

It's okay, we'll find her.
I'm not worried about that.

What are you worried about then?

What's gonna happen when we find her.

Mom is my best friend.

Hey, I know.

I was only trying to get your mom help.

You have to believe that.

Is it true that you got her
a Saint Bernadette medal?

(CHUCKLES) Yes, it is.

When she won the MacArthur grant?

That's right. That was a long time ago.

I didn't do it just
for the name. I told her...

"It's Saint Bernadette,
Our Lady of Lourdes."

"She had visions, 18 in all."

"Beeber..."

"Beeber Bifocal was your first vision."

"Twenty Mile House was your second."

"Here's to 16 more."

Oh, man.

I think I really failed Mom.

Sh... She's an artist...

who stopped creating.

I should have never let that happen.

Well, why did you?

I don't know.

I mean, I don't think I knew how

to try to get...

an artist with, urn, your mom's

particular kind of genius to create.

That's... gigantic.

I can understand how to teach
robots what people need...

but I couldn't understand that
about your mom.

Have you noticed, by the way,
that I haven't been checking

my email very much on this trip?

No, not really.

Well, there is a huge reorg
going on at Microsoft.

They're probably announcing it
while we sit on these rocks,

but Samantha 2 is canceled.

Canceled? What do you mean canceled?

Well, um...

They're folding Samantha 2 into games.

Yeah, I know. I'm not
really interested in that,

so I said,

"You guys can go ahead
and do that yourself."

Doesn't matter anyway.

I turned in the old badge.

Dad's a free agent now.

I've never known you without your badge.

(LAUGHS)

Well, get used to it.

I'm gonna be around a lot more now.

I would really like a shot
at designing that new station.

- You're an architect?
- Well, no.

I've never really considered myself

much of an architect, per se.

I'm more of a, um...

I'm more of a creative
problem solver with good taste

and a soft spot for logistical nightmares.

(CHUCKLES)

Speaking of...

I really need to get to the South Pole.

You know, check out the lay of the land.

(LAUGHS)

Sorry.

That's probably not happening.

(BERNADETTE LAUGHS)

No, that would be damn near impossible.

- (LAUGHS)
- Put It like this...

I spent the last five years
writing my grant,

and I'm just now getting there
for the first time.

It's the most competitive place

in the world for scientists.

Two more Pink Penguins?

It's on me.

- Yea h.
- Two more.

Hey, two more. (CHUCKLES)

Yeah, why not? I don't leave
for a few hours anyway.

Oh, where are you going?

Uh, the Allegra is rendezvousing

with our marine research vessel.

That's how I'm getting to Palmer Station.

(WARBLING)

BERNADETTE: Absolutely.

I know I'm not authorized to, uh, be here,

but, you know, I'll work for free.

No job is too demeaning.

Yeah, that's great, but guess what.

There are people here

who have come here
through proper channels.

They have written approvals,
gotten grants.

And you show up here unannounced,

a Stowaway, and you expect a spot?

But I am an architect.

That doesn't mean shit around here.

I mean, I have Nobel Prize winners

sanding and painting decks,
an economist on kitchen duty,

and a television executive
who's studying fur seals.

And I've been helping Becky
with her research.

(STAMMERING) Yeah.
I'm, I'm sorry, Ellen. I just...

I... I had no idea and...

How would she get home?

We can stick her on the next ship out.

Where's she gonna sleep?
Aren't all the beds accounted for?

That's what we always say.

In the meantime,

- I will hand you over to Mike.
- Uh-huh.

He is a former state senator from Boston

who wanted so badly
to spend time in Antarctica

that he trained to become
a diesel mechanic.

All right.

I'm letting you know now

because you're listed as her next of kin,

but your wife's name is on
the Allegra passenger list.

Good. Thank you.

Mr. Branch, your wife went missing

somewhere in the Gerlache Strait.

What does that mean?

Her last recorded activity was carding in

from an excursion 26 hours ago.

She has since gone missing.

Okay, uh, Bernadette
really likes her privacy.

The ship has been searched top to bottom.

But she's got to be somewhere.

This report is largely based
on the electronic signature

created by your wife's
magnetically coded ID card.

As you can see, on her last night,

she ran up a large bar tab.

It's like you're assuming
she's dead or something.

She just escaped again.

To where? It's, it's not like
disappearing from Seattle.

Out here, there's nowhere to go
but the boat that you're on.

(WHERE'S SHE GONNA STAY.)
Out there with the penguins?

You're looking at the
Pink Penguins on her bar bill

and you're assuming she's depressed.

What if she was having a good time?

How do you know
she wasn't celebrating, Dad?

All right. Okay. I hope you're right, Bee.

While you spent your whole life at work,

Mom and Iwere having the best time ever.

We live for each other.

And she would never do anything

where she'd never see me again.

(GRUNTS) Got it. Yeah.

Okay. Now we can get this little...

We got to get the glow plug outta there.

- Do you have the crescent?
- Yep.

- There you go.
- Thank you.

Fox, come here.

I googled you. So why are you here?

I am trying not to be
a menace to society anymore.

And, look, I probably did get
a little carried away,

but, Ellen, I would really like a shot

at designing this new station at 90 South.

Well, I, I know they're dismantling it,

and they/re gonna build a new one.

You know, anyone who's gonna
have a shot at redesigning it,

they're gonna have to go visit
and see it for themselves.

No one just visits the South Pole.

It's essential personnel only.

And as far as I can make out, you fall

in that rather large category
of nonessential.

It's just, the way I work

is I have to inhabit a space, you know,

before I can even begin designing it.

Before I can discover what it needs to be.

You know... God, just thinking
about it's got my heart racing.

- Uh-oh.
- Oh, no.

It's not the bad kind of heart racing,

as in "I', m gonna die".

It's the good kind of heart racing,

as in, "Hello, can I help you
with something?"

"'Cause if not step aside

'cause I am about to kick
the shit out of life."

Do you have any idea
what overwintering entails?

It's twice the challenge
anyone ever imagines going in.

The only ones who can cut it
are the ones who have

a little bit of
an antisocial streak in them.

You have to be comfortable
spending a lot of time alone.

You have to go for long
stretches without exercise.

Showers are few and far between.

Sounds like I've been in training for this

for the last 20 years.

VIVIAN: All I wanted was South America.

Are you gonna take that away from me too?

World domination ain't pretty.

(SOFTLY) Oof.

Where are we?

IRIS: Um...

Oh, I think we're dropping off
a researcher at Palmer Station.

Right now?

We're at Palmer Station?

VIVIAN: Yeah, the cruise
companies always like to do

these transfers
in the middle of the night.

Really?

VIVIAN: Yeah, they just keep it hush-hush

so as not to bother the paying customers.

See, Dad? It's Palmer Station right there.

There's a ton of people there,

and I really think Mom is gonna be there.

We have to go and check
and see if she's there.

You wanna borrow a Zodiac and go find out?

- Yeah. Yeah.
- Okay, you wait here.

I'm gonna get my gear.

Ah! Don't go anywhere!

ELGIE: All right, look, um...

Just, uh, you know, act normal.

- Look cool, all right?
- BEE: Yeah.

Oh, crap. All right. I got to
look for a place to dock.

Uh, just ram into the shore at full speed.

You just got to do that.

- No, you don't.
- Yes, you do.

(SANDER WHIRRING)

Hey.

Hey.

Lucky for you, I'm partial
to weirdos and geniuses.

I got you a spot on a Herc
from McMurdo to 90 South.

You have to stand for
the whole three-hour flight

next to powdered milk and jet fuel.

I'm fine with standing. (CHUCKLES)

You say that.

Do you have all your wisdom teeth?

Uh, yeah.

No wisdom teeth.

We once had to, uh, airlift out somebody

with infected wisdom teeth.

Do not ask me how much that cost.

Oh, shit.

No, don't worry about it.

The Laurence M. Gould is loading up now.

And once you get to McMurdo,
we can get rid of 'em.

Oh, okay.

We have a veterinarian from Pasadena

with a degree in equine dentistry.

- He's done it before.
- On which animal?

Volunteers can't be choosy.

And once you get to the South Pole,

you are there for five weeks.

No going in or out.

Oh, God, this is so great.

Oh, the only thing I feel I have to do is

I got to run it by my family.

You know, see they're okay with it.

- Do it.
- (EXHALES HEAVILY)

- Hey.
- Yeah.

Thank you.

(WHOOPING QUIETLY)

BEE: Hi, you've reached
the archaic landline

of the Fox-Branch residence.

Since my parents still won't
let me have a cell phone,

all my friends can leave messages here.

- (ANSWERING MACHINE BEEPS)
- Hey, Buzzy.

Hey... Elgie.

I'm sorry I haven't called,
but as you know,

my phone jumped off
the Tallahatchie Bridge

and has not been seen since.

There's much more explanation
coming in our future,

but for now the headlines,

and it has been a busy news day.

I am about to head to McMurdo Station

to have four wisdom teeth

voluntarily extracted by a veterinarian.

So, I got that going for me.

(INDISTINCT RADIO CHATTER)

(WATER DRIPPING)

BERNADETTE: This crazy place
is a shifting ice sheet.

And did you know

they have to reposition
the official South Pole marker

- because it can move...
- Shhh.

BERNADETTE: 100 feet a year?

God, I might have to make
my building a wind-powered,

crab-walking igloo.

- I don't know. I'll figure it out.
- (WHISPERS) She's building.

- That's what insomnia is for.
- She's making a building.

The thing about it is, any structure built

will have to be coordinated
out of the United States.

You know, I mean...

Every material down to the nail

will have to be flown in.

Getting the supplies here
will be so costly

that absolutely nothing can be wasted.

You know, I've realized that none of what

has become of me is Seattle's fault.

Well, might be a little,

but let's withhold final judgment

until I start being more of an artist

and less of a menace.

But I make you guys this one promise,

and it is a big one.

I will move forward.

Oh, God, this is more of a conversation

than a message.

Uh... But, listen, look um,
I have this one shot

to make it to the South Pole

and looks like we're leaving
in a couple of hours.

And I'll be gone for five weeks.

But I will only go
if it's okay with you guys...

so would you please call me?

Um, here's the number I can be reached at.

(SIGHS) It goes through Denver,
believe it or not.

303-295-

Mom!

You can go!

Bee?

(BERNADETTE EXCLAIMING)

I knew I'd find you.

God, how did you...

How did you get here?

(BERNADETTE EXCLAIMING)

Dad brought you something.

He did?

(POCKET OPENS)

BEE: We decided

there's no way I could have
taken up all 16 miracles.

ELGIE: Yep.

You got a lot more miracles left.

(CRIES SOFTLY)

(BERNADETTE CHUCKLES)

BEE: Scientists always thought

gentoo penguins mated for life.

But they recently discovered
that wasn't true,

and about 20 percent of them don't.

The way I look at it then,

that means the ones
who stay together forever

are making a choice.

Just like Mom and Dad.

♪ Lying in my bed ♪

♪ hear the clock tick ♪

♪ And think of you ♪

♪ Caught up in circles ♪

♪ Confusion is nothing new ♪

♪ Flashback, warm nights ♪

♪ Almost left behind ♪

♪ Suitcase of memories ♪

♪ Time after ♪

♪ Sometimes ♪

♪ You picture me ♪

♪ 'm walking too far ahead ♪

♪ You're calling to me ♪

♪ can't hear what you've said ♪

♪ Then you say, "Go slow" ♪

♪ fall behind ♪

♪ The second hand unwinds ♪

♪ f you're lost you can look ♪

♪ And you will find me ♪

♪ Time after time ♪

♪ f you fall I will catch you ♪

♪ ll! Be waiting ♪

♪ Time after time ♪

♪ f you're lost you can look ♪

♪ And you will find me ♪

♪ Time after time ♪

♪ if you fall I will catch you ♪

♪ will be waiting ♪

♪ Time after time ♪

♪ After my picture fades ♪

♪ And darkness has turned to gray ♪

♪ Watching through windows ♪

♪ You're wondering if I'm okayl ♪

♪ Secrets stolen ♪

♪ From deep inside ♪

♪ The drum beats out of time ♪

♪ If you're lost you can look ♪

♪ And you will find me ♪

♪ Time after time ♪

♪ if you fall I will catch you ♪

♪ ll! Be waiting ♪

♪ Time after time ♪

♪ You said, "Go slow" ♪

♪ fall behind ♪

♪ The second hand unwinds ♪

♪ If you're lost you can look ♪

♪ And you will find me ♪

♪ Time after time ♪

♪ if you fall I will catch you ♪

♪ ll! Be waiting ♪

♪ Time after time ♪

♪ If you're lost you can look ♪

♪ And you will find me ♪

♪ Time after time ♪

♪ if you fall I will catch you ♪

♪ will be waiting ♪

♪ Time after time ♪

♪ Time after time ♪

♪ Time after time ♪

♪ Time after time ♪

♪ Time after time ♪

♪ Time after time ♪

♪ Time after time ♪

♪ Time after ♪

♪ Time ♪

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