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1
00:00:01,767 --> 00:00:04,702
(theme song playing)
2
00:01:22,748 --> 00:01:25,349
MAN (on TV):
Mrs. Carson, I don't think
we have a lot of time.
3
00:01:25,417 --> 00:01:28,719
WOMAN (crying):
No. No, Val, no. Please.
4
00:01:28,788 --> 00:01:30,288
Please don't go, Val.
5
00:01:30,355 --> 00:01:34,625
(enormous thud)
6
00:01:34,693 --> 00:01:36,528
(indistinct conversation on TV)
7
00:01:39,698 --> 00:01:42,467
(enormous thud)
8
00:01:42,535 --> 00:01:44,903
(debris falling)
9
00:01:47,039 --> 00:01:48,906
(enormous thud)
10
00:01:52,411 --> 00:01:54,278
(vehicles passing)
11
00:02:07,693 --> 00:02:08,860
Jim!
12
00:02:08,927 --> 00:02:11,896
Hey, hey, Jim, what
in the world happened?
13
00:02:11,964 --> 00:02:17,969
Well, did you ever have one
of those mornings?
14
00:02:18,037 --> 00:02:19,837
You know,
15
00:02:19,872 --> 00:02:22,607
the kind when a big steel ball
16
00:02:22,674 --> 00:02:25,743
comes crashing
through your apartment?
17
00:02:25,811 --> 00:02:27,011
You mean a
wrecking ball?
18
00:02:27,078 --> 00:02:29,480
Yeah, yeah, I'll say.
19
00:02:29,548 --> 00:02:31,882
It demolished the place.
20
00:02:33,619 --> 00:02:35,753
They tore down your building
without even warning you?
21
00:02:35,821 --> 00:02:37,222
Well,
22
00:02:37,289 --> 00:02:40,458
you put up
with a few inconveniences
23
00:02:40,525 --> 00:02:44,262
when you live
in a condemned building.
24
00:02:44,330 --> 00:02:46,130
ALEX:
Hey, Jim,
25
00:02:46,198 --> 00:02:47,732
you look exhausted.
26
00:02:47,800 --> 00:02:50,334
Why don't you go someplace
and get some sleep?
27
00:02:50,402 --> 00:02:52,970
Ah, good idea, Alex.
28
00:02:59,912 --> 00:03:02,146
Good night, Alex.
29
00:03:02,214 --> 00:03:04,115
LOUIE:
Forget it, Iggy.
30
00:03:04,182 --> 00:03:06,250
You can't stay here.
31
00:03:06,319 --> 00:03:08,052
What-what kind of a guy are you?
LOUIE:
No way!
32
00:03:08,120 --> 00:03:09,821
No way! No way!
The guy wants
some rest.
33
00:03:09,888 --> 00:03:12,023
Come on, boss, help me out!
34
00:03:12,091 --> 00:03:13,825
He can't sleep in the garage.
35
00:03:13,893 --> 00:03:16,026
Oh. Oh, great, great.
Boy, you...
36
00:03:16,062 --> 00:03:17,328
You-you want it
from him, huh?
37
00:03:17,396 --> 00:03:19,964
He's the last person in the
world that'd help you out.
38
00:03:20,032 --> 00:03:21,466
I don't want him
staying here.
39
00:03:21,534 --> 00:03:23,267
Let him stay
at your apartment, Reiger.
40
00:03:23,369 --> 00:03:26,170
Yeah.
41
00:03:28,274 --> 00:03:30,942
Well, what are friends for?
42
00:03:31,010 --> 00:03:32,210
Yeah.
43
00:03:32,278 --> 00:03:33,678
(laughs)
44
00:03:33,745 --> 00:03:35,680
Why not?
45
00:03:35,748 --> 00:03:37,515
Why not let him
stay with you?
46
00:03:37,583 --> 00:03:39,050
Or you?
47
00:03:39,118 --> 00:03:40,318
Or you?
48
00:03:40,386 --> 00:03:43,154
LOUIE:
Or you?
49
00:03:43,222 --> 00:03:46,591
Well, now, you're a
great bunch of pals.
50
00:03:46,692 --> 00:03:48,493
ALEX:
One of us would
love to have him.
51
00:03:48,560 --> 00:03:49,661
Yeah.
LOUIE:
Oh.
52
00:03:49,729 --> 00:03:50,929
Wouldn't
one of us?
53
00:03:50,997 --> 00:03:52,097
Yeah.
To have him?
54
00:03:52,164 --> 00:03:53,932
Sure, one
of us would.
55
00:03:54,000 --> 00:03:56,066
So, who's it gonna be?
56
00:03:56,134 --> 00:03:57,235
(wry chuckle)
57
00:03:57,303 --> 00:03:58,836
Hey, Iggy, you'd be
a good guest, wouldn't you?
58
00:03:58,904 --> 00:04:02,941
Well, sometimes I leave the cap
off the toothpaste.
59
00:04:03,008 --> 00:04:04,208
Oh.
60
00:04:04,276 --> 00:04:06,311
I forget to wipe my feet,
61
00:04:06,378 --> 00:04:08,313
and I usually scream
62
00:04:08,380 --> 00:04:10,648
for several hours
in my sleep.
63
00:04:15,220 --> 00:04:16,253
I don't mind a little screaming
64
00:04:16,321 --> 00:04:18,056
in the middle
of the night. Do you?
65
00:04:18,124 --> 00:04:19,657
What else are friends for?
66
00:04:19,725 --> 00:04:23,961
So... who's taking Iggy home?
67
00:04:24,029 --> 00:04:25,963
Well, I,
you know...
68
00:04:26,031 --> 00:04:27,732
Well, um...
69
00:04:27,800 --> 00:04:29,267
You-you want
to draw lots?
70
00:04:29,334 --> 00:04:30,635
ALEX:
No. No, no, no, no.
71
00:04:30,736 --> 00:04:31,770
That's not
the problem.
72
00:04:31,837 --> 00:04:33,038
That's not the
problem, Jim.
73
00:04:33,105 --> 00:04:34,806
The problem is, we'd
all love to have you.
74
00:04:34,874 --> 00:04:36,441
Yeah.
That's right,
all of us.
That's the problem
75
00:04:36,509 --> 00:04:39,744
Well, look, let me
make it easy for you.
76
00:04:39,812 --> 00:04:42,814
Iggy, if you had
your choice...
Uh-huh.
77
00:04:42,881 --> 00:04:44,315
...of all your friends,
78
00:04:44,382 --> 00:04:49,286
which one would you like
to stay with?
79
00:04:49,322 --> 00:04:52,556
JIM (sighing):
Uh...
80
00:04:52,625 --> 00:04:57,028
promise there won't
be any hurt feelings
81
00:04:57,095 --> 00:05:00,398
if I pick my
best buddy?
82
00:05:00,465 --> 00:05:03,000
Oy...
83
00:05:03,068 --> 00:05:04,301
Oh, that sounds fair.
84
00:05:04,369 --> 00:05:06,203
That couldn't
be fairer.
Yeah.
85
00:05:06,238 --> 00:05:07,539
Then it's settled.
86
00:05:07,606 --> 00:05:08,906
I'll be the
perfect guest.
87
00:05:08,974 --> 00:05:10,074
It's you, boss.
88
00:05:10,142 --> 00:05:12,109
(funny groan)
89
00:05:13,378 --> 00:05:16,414
Well, that sounds
like a good choice.
90
00:05:16,481 --> 00:05:17,715
Yeah.
(Louie grumbling)
91
00:05:17,783 --> 00:05:19,584
TONY:
See you, Louie.
Wait, wait. Wait, wait.
92
00:05:19,685 --> 00:05:21,186
Wait.
See you
later now.
93
00:05:21,253 --> 00:05:22,921
See you, guys.
94
00:05:22,988 --> 00:05:26,523
Thanks for bailing
me out, boss.
95
00:05:26,591 --> 00:05:29,126
Hey, dirt face,
I'm not your best friend.
96
00:05:29,194 --> 00:05:31,261
Oh, yes,
you are.
No.
97
00:05:31,329 --> 00:05:32,797
Look who just came
through for me.
98
00:05:32,864 --> 00:05:34,065
No, no, no, no, no.
99
00:05:34,133 --> 00:05:36,868
If we didn't live
in a society
100
00:05:36,936 --> 00:05:40,071
that got hung up
on the fear
101
00:05:40,138 --> 00:05:42,240
of members of
the same sex
102
00:05:42,307 --> 00:05:45,076
sharing mutual
affection for
each other,
103
00:05:45,143 --> 00:05:47,746
I'd kiss you full
on the mouth.
104
00:05:47,847 --> 00:05:49,647
Yuck!
105
00:05:51,516 --> 00:05:55,186
Apparently, the thought
makes you uncomfortable.
106
00:05:55,254 --> 00:05:58,589
Well, let's forget
it and go home.
No, no, no.
107
00:05:58,657 --> 00:05:59,890
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, no, no,
no, no, no.
108
00:05:59,958 --> 00:06:01,092
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
109
00:06:01,159 --> 00:06:02,794
Come on, come on,
come on.
No, no, no, no, no, no.
110
00:06:02,862 --> 00:06:03,961
Relax. Come on.
Yeah, yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah.
111
00:06:04,029 --> 00:06:05,663
No, no, no.
Come on.
112
00:06:05,731 --> 00:06:07,365
Hey, get your
hands off of me!
113
00:06:07,433 --> 00:06:09,100
Okay.
Get out!
114
00:06:15,274 --> 00:06:17,374
How's married life, Latka?
115
00:06:17,442 --> 00:06:18,309
Oh, it's fine.
116
00:06:18,377 --> 00:06:19,611
I like it very much.
117
00:06:19,678 --> 00:06:23,047
I like the frequent sex, and
118
00:06:23,082 --> 00:06:27,251
Simka is a very good cook.
119
00:06:27,319 --> 00:06:28,620
She wants me to...
120
00:06:28,687 --> 00:06:33,124
to ask you all you can come
to dinner on June 15?
121
00:06:33,192 --> 00:06:35,126
Why June 15?
122
00:06:35,194 --> 00:06:38,562
Okay, well,
how about tonight?
123
00:06:38,597 --> 00:06:40,398
(Louie grunts)
124
00:06:44,303 --> 00:06:46,570
It wasn't so bad.
125
00:06:46,638 --> 00:06:48,506
We played pool.
126
00:06:48,573 --> 00:06:49,808
We went to sleep.
127
00:06:49,875 --> 00:06:50,975
He screamed.
128
00:06:51,043 --> 00:06:52,977
We went back to sleep.
129
00:06:54,980 --> 00:06:56,147
Uh, what's
going on?
130
00:06:56,215 --> 00:06:57,548
Oh, nothing much.
131
00:06:57,616 --> 00:07:00,318
Latka invited everybody
to his house for dinner tonight
132
00:07:00,386 --> 00:07:01,986
with him and his wife.
133
00:07:02,054 --> 00:07:04,722
Oh, boy.
134
00:07:04,790 --> 00:07:07,158
Latka's in really good
spirits lately, ain't he?
135
00:07:07,226 --> 00:07:09,127
Yeah, he sure
looks happy.
136
00:07:09,228 --> 00:07:11,228
(Jeff chuckles)
(whistling)
137
00:07:11,297 --> 00:07:13,765
You know, I don't,
uh, feel out of line
138
00:07:13,832 --> 00:07:15,667
saying this, uh,
Jeff, because,
139
00:07:15,734 --> 00:07:17,769
uh, well, we-we,
uh, you know,
140
00:07:17,836 --> 00:07:20,604
we worked side by side,
you know, for a long time.
141
00:07:20,673 --> 00:07:21,973
You become
pretty close?
142
00:07:22,041 --> 00:07:23,274
Yeah.
Pals?
143
00:07:23,341 --> 00:07:25,743
Um, I think, uh,
you ought to think
144
00:07:25,811 --> 00:07:28,479
about getting married
and settling down.
145
00:07:28,547 --> 00:07:31,248
I am married, Louie.
146
00:07:31,350 --> 00:07:34,052
Well, hey,
congratulations!
147
00:07:34,119 --> 00:07:35,452
When did this happen?
148
00:07:35,520 --> 00:07:38,689
About 11 years ago.
149
00:07:38,724 --> 00:07:39,924
Congratulations again.
150
00:07:39,992 --> 00:07:41,358
And, uh, uh... and, uh,
151
00:07:41,426 --> 00:07:43,961
pass that along
to missus, uh...
152
00:07:44,029 --> 00:07:47,431
Bennett. My last name
is Bennett, Louie.
153
00:07:47,499 --> 00:07:49,467
I knew that. I knew that.
154
00:07:49,535 --> 00:07:50,802
Phew!
155
00:07:50,870 --> 00:07:53,003
Hey, Alex, it's for you.
156
00:07:53,105 --> 00:07:54,639
Who is it?
I don't know.
157
00:07:54,707 --> 00:07:56,674
The guy's screaming and sobbing
so loud, I can't tell.
158
00:07:58,477 --> 00:08:00,444
Hello?
159
00:08:01,446 --> 00:08:02,546
No, no, no, come on.
160
00:08:02,614 --> 00:08:04,515
Come on, Jim.
Nothing could be that bad.
161
00:08:04,582 --> 00:08:05,683
What is it?
162
00:08:05,750 --> 00:08:07,118
No. Just-just tell me
what happened.
163
00:08:07,286 --> 00:08:10,922
Ji... Jim, you're
at Louie's, right?
164
00:08:10,989 --> 00:08:12,924
All-all right,
I'll, I'll be right there.
165
00:08:20,299 --> 00:08:22,233
(knocking)
166
00:08:25,470 --> 00:08:26,737
Who is it?
167
00:08:26,739 --> 00:08:28,172
It's me, Alex.
168
00:08:28,240 --> 00:08:29,106
Oh!
169
00:08:31,076 --> 00:08:32,610
Hi, Alex.
170
00:08:32,678 --> 00:08:34,245
Hi, Ji...
171
00:08:34,312 --> 00:08:37,548
Oh, my God!
172
00:08:39,618 --> 00:08:41,518
Then it's noticeable!
173
00:08:41,620 --> 00:08:43,754
I knew it!
174
00:08:43,822 --> 00:08:46,890
Jim! Jim! Jim!
175
00:08:46,958 --> 00:08:50,627
What the hell happened here?
176
00:08:50,695 --> 00:08:51,696
Well, it's
the old story.
177
00:08:51,764 --> 00:08:52,897
I was smoking in bed.
178
00:08:52,965 --> 00:08:54,298
And you fell asleep?
179
00:08:54,366 --> 00:08:56,300
No. I didn't
notice the flames
180
00:08:56,368 --> 00:08:58,803
consuming the apartment.
181
00:08:58,871 --> 00:09:00,071
Jim!
182
00:09:00,138 --> 00:09:01,873
I left something
burning on the stove.
183
00:09:01,941 --> 00:09:03,207
Oh, my God!
184
00:09:03,275 --> 00:09:06,310
Oh, my God in heaven,
look at this place!
185
00:09:06,378 --> 00:09:08,312
Oh, I-I don't...
186
00:09:08,380 --> 00:09:10,548
What do you think
is gonna happen, Alex?
187
00:09:10,616 --> 00:09:14,118
Do you think
Louie's gonna be upset?
188
00:09:14,186 --> 00:09:17,121
The question is, is whether
he'll kill you or not.
Oh...
189
00:09:17,188 --> 00:09:18,989
Holy mackerel!
190
00:09:19,058 --> 00:09:20,891
Everything Louie owns
has been destroyed!
191
00:09:20,959 --> 00:09:23,294
No, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no.
192
00:09:23,361 --> 00:09:24,995
That's not true.
193
00:09:25,063 --> 00:09:26,230
I'll fix it up.
194
00:09:26,298 --> 00:09:27,632
I'll work hard.
195
00:09:27,700 --> 00:09:28,599
You'll help me.
Huh?
196
00:09:28,667 --> 00:09:31,102
There's a lot
we can do in a few hours.
197
00:09:31,170 --> 00:09:32,303
What are you
talking about?
198
00:09:32,404 --> 00:09:35,173
Uh, some paint,
uh, some wallpaper,
199
00:09:35,240 --> 00:09:37,775
a few flowers
discreetly placed about.
200
00:09:37,842 --> 00:09:39,910
Jim.
201
00:09:39,978 --> 00:09:41,679
It's gonna be okay.
202
00:09:41,714 --> 00:09:43,414
Yeah, well,
all-all right.
Right, Alex?
203
00:09:43,482 --> 00:09:44,448
Alex, isn't it
gonna be okay?
Yeah, yeah, okay.
204
00:09:44,516 --> 00:09:45,616
Right, Alex,
tell me it's gonna be fine.
205
00:09:45,684 --> 00:09:47,017
No, no, no, no. Jim,
Jim, calm down, calm down.
206
00:09:47,085 --> 00:09:48,653
Isn't it gonna be okay,
Alex?
Calm down, calm down.
207
00:09:48,721 --> 00:09:50,521
Alex, please,
is it gonna be okay?
Jim, Jim,
Jim, Jim...
208
00:09:50,589 --> 00:09:52,389
Alex.
Calm... calm... calm...
209
00:09:52,457 --> 00:09:55,059
calm... Now,
don't panic.
210
00:09:55,127 --> 00:09:56,194
You hear me?
211
00:09:56,261 --> 00:09:58,229
Don't panic!
212
00:10:01,867 --> 00:10:04,301
You're right, Alex.
213
00:10:06,639 --> 00:10:09,306
The thing to do
214
00:10:09,374 --> 00:10:11,375
is to calm down
215
00:10:11,443 --> 00:10:15,146
and rationally
assess the situation.
216
00:10:18,283 --> 00:10:21,419
Everything's gonna be okay.
217
00:10:22,854 --> 00:10:24,655
(screaming)
218
00:10:24,723 --> 00:10:26,957
No, no, Jim, Jim,
Jim, please. Jim.
219
00:10:27,025 --> 00:10:28,893
Easy, easy, easy, easy.
220
00:10:34,399 --> 00:10:35,666
(man whistling)
221
00:10:35,734 --> 00:10:37,301
JIM:
I think I hear him coming.
222
00:10:37,369 --> 00:10:38,469
(whistling continues)
223
00:10:38,537 --> 00:10:39,937
Oh, my God.
224
00:10:40,004 --> 00:10:42,573
(door opening)
LOUIE:
Oh, Iggy, I'm home!
225
00:10:42,608 --> 00:10:43,674
What are you cooking?
226
00:10:43,742 --> 00:10:45,142
(groans)
227
00:10:50,015 --> 00:10:51,715
Uh...
228
00:10:53,218 --> 00:10:54,318
Uh, boss...
229
00:10:54,385 --> 00:10:56,020
(clears throat)
230
00:10:56,088 --> 00:10:58,889
...I owe you an apology.
231
00:11:00,658 --> 00:11:05,096
Just keep in mind
232
00:11:05,164 --> 00:11:06,998
that material
233
00:11:07,066 --> 00:11:10,100
possessions
are simply excess baggage
234
00:11:10,168 --> 00:11:12,302
on the journey of life.
235
00:11:14,706 --> 00:11:18,576
Everything I own
is destroyed!
236
00:11:20,212 --> 00:11:21,312
(hollow note plays)
237
00:11:21,379 --> 00:11:23,314
(clack)
238
00:11:24,950 --> 00:11:27,785
Louie, Louie, Louie,
Jim had a horrible accident.
239
00:11:27,852 --> 00:11:30,488
I mean, I-I know
it's a terrible loss for you,
240
00:11:30,555 --> 00:11:32,923
but, uh, thank God
nobody was hurt.
241
00:11:32,991 --> 00:11:34,925
What?
242
00:11:37,061 --> 00:11:40,130
Thank God
nobody was hurt?
243
00:11:40,198 --> 00:11:41,432
Thank God
that this man
244
00:11:41,499 --> 00:11:44,468
who just destroyed
everything I ever owned...
245
00:11:44,536 --> 00:11:46,037
No, no, no, no, no...
246
00:11:46,105 --> 00:11:48,039
...in my life was not killed!
Was not killed!
Louie! Louie!
247
00:11:48,107 --> 00:11:50,174
Was not killed.
Not everything
was destroyed, boss.
248
00:11:50,242 --> 00:11:51,942
Not everything.
249
00:11:52,010 --> 00:11:53,010
Louie...
250
00:11:53,078 --> 00:11:54,312
(growling)
251
00:11:55,347 --> 00:11:59,283
I saved your most
prized possession.
252
00:12:05,157 --> 00:12:07,091
See, boss?
253
00:12:08,360 --> 00:12:11,595
Your beloved violin.
254
00:12:13,398 --> 00:12:17,835
JIM:
The only irreplaceable thing
in your life.
255
00:12:17,903 --> 00:12:20,671
I risked my life...
256
00:12:22,741 --> 00:12:25,009
...to see that
it wasn't hurt.
257
00:12:26,945 --> 00:12:28,879
My violin.
258
00:12:32,518 --> 00:12:36,387
He treasures that more
than anything in the world.
259
00:12:44,363 --> 00:12:48,166
Good thing I didn't
save the piano.
260
00:12:51,203 --> 00:12:54,071
Look what you've done!
261
00:12:55,140 --> 00:12:57,908
My apartment...
262
00:12:57,976 --> 00:13:00,511
my life-- everything's gone.
263
00:13:01,412 --> 00:13:04,415
My bumper pool table!
264
00:13:04,482 --> 00:13:07,418
(crying):
My... my rug.
265
00:13:09,421 --> 00:13:11,322
My TV.
266
00:13:12,524 --> 00:13:13,658
(switch clicks)
267
00:13:16,728 --> 00:13:17,828
(switch clicks)
268
00:13:23,935 --> 00:13:27,404
My Time Life books
on the great lizards.
269
00:13:29,975 --> 00:13:33,677
Ma's needlepoint pillow.
270
00:13:34,613 --> 00:13:36,546
(crying)
271
00:13:39,550 --> 00:13:41,351
LOUIE:
Oh...
272
00:13:42,487 --> 00:13:45,355
My photographs.
273
00:13:48,427 --> 00:13:50,327
My piano, my-my photographs,
274
00:13:50,395 --> 00:13:52,530
my TV, my books.
275
00:13:52,597 --> 00:13:55,599
My-my bumper pool set
is destroyed!
276
00:13:55,701 --> 00:13:57,401
Not all of it, boss.
277
00:13:57,469 --> 00:14:00,404
These two pool balls
are okay.
278
00:14:00,472 --> 00:14:01,838
Don't cry, boss.
279
00:14:01,907 --> 00:14:03,907
Please, don't cry.
280
00:14:03,909 --> 00:14:05,242
Here.
281
00:14:06,311 --> 00:14:08,145
(screams)
Oh!
282
00:14:09,248 --> 00:14:11,415
Out!
283
00:14:11,483 --> 00:14:13,284
Get out! Out! Get out!
284
00:14:13,352 --> 00:14:15,286
I never want to see your face
again.
Boss...
285
00:14:15,354 --> 00:14:16,620
You're fired!
286
00:14:16,688 --> 00:14:18,622
You're fired!
287
00:14:23,962 --> 00:14:26,597
Hey, Lou, Lou...
288
00:14:26,698 --> 00:14:27,697
I mean, Lord knows,
this is a terrible...
289
00:14:27,765 --> 00:14:30,233
You get out, too!
290
00:14:30,269 --> 00:14:32,069
Hey, Louie...
Out, out, out, out, out!
291
00:14:38,910 --> 00:14:41,845
I can't believe this happened.
292
00:14:49,487 --> 00:14:52,456
Louie, Louie...
293
00:14:52,524 --> 00:14:54,791
Leave me alone!
294
00:15:05,370 --> 00:15:07,270
¶
295
00:15:15,947 --> 00:15:17,848
Boss...
296
00:15:21,420 --> 00:15:24,688
...I feel terrible
about what happened.
297
00:15:28,126 --> 00:15:30,394
I came here to give you this.
298
00:15:32,030 --> 00:15:34,965
Nothing is gonna
change my mind.
299
00:15:35,033 --> 00:15:36,300
Nothing, you
understand?
300
00:15:36,368 --> 00:15:37,868
Now get out of here!
301
00:15:42,140 --> 00:15:44,908
Guess I'll go and get my things.
302
00:15:47,745 --> 00:15:49,679
Boy...
303
00:15:49,747 --> 00:15:52,782
I'm really gonna miss
this place.
304
00:15:55,687 --> 00:15:58,455
It was wonderful
working with you guys.
305
00:15:58,523 --> 00:16:00,057
Okay, Jim.
306
00:16:00,124 --> 00:16:02,225
Hey, Jim...
Huh?
307
00:16:02,361 --> 00:16:04,194
We'll try to find something
for you, you know,
308
00:16:04,262 --> 00:16:06,096
like a-a another job or, uh...
TONY:
Yeah.
309
00:16:07,098 --> 00:16:10,100
Well... nah.
310
00:16:10,168 --> 00:16:13,103
It's back in the
streets for me.
311
00:16:13,171 --> 00:16:15,105
Don't you see?
312
00:16:17,275 --> 00:16:20,877
I was a success here
not because of the job,
313
00:16:20,945 --> 00:16:23,446
but because of that
man over there.
314
00:16:24,416 --> 00:16:26,316
He yelled at me.
315
00:16:26,384 --> 00:16:28,285
He abused me,
316
00:16:28,353 --> 00:16:30,588
but he made me work!
317
00:16:31,989 --> 00:16:35,426
Where else am I gonna
find a guy like Louie?
318
00:16:35,494 --> 00:16:39,129
Try Amityville.
319
00:16:41,132 --> 00:16:44,134
Louie, aren't you even
gonna look at this?
320
00:16:44,202 --> 00:16:45,636
No!
321
00:16:45,704 --> 00:16:47,638
JIM:
If you won't read it,
322
00:16:47,706 --> 00:16:49,640
at least let Alex
read it to you.
323
00:16:49,708 --> 00:16:52,109
If it touches you, good.
324
00:16:52,210 --> 00:16:55,045
If it doesn't,
not another word.
325
00:16:55,147 --> 00:16:57,414
I'll just disappear.
326
00:16:57,482 --> 00:16:58,616
"Dear Boss"...
327
00:16:58,683 --> 00:17:01,484
(harmonica playing)
328
00:17:04,456 --> 00:17:05,556
"Dear Boss.
329
00:17:05,623 --> 00:17:07,558
"I always...
330
00:17:08,893 --> 00:17:12,029
"I always swore I'd never
ask my father for money,
331
00:17:12,097 --> 00:17:14,164
"even though he has a lot...
332
00:17:17,302 --> 00:17:18,769
"...but I hoped in some way,
333
00:17:18,836 --> 00:17:20,937
"money might make up
for your loss.
334
00:17:21,005 --> 00:17:22,939
"So, even if you
never forgive me,
335
00:17:23,007 --> 00:17:25,842
"I hope you'll accept
the enclosed check.
336
00:17:25,910 --> 00:17:28,145
"With all best wishes for you,
337
00:17:28,180 --> 00:17:31,448
"dictated but not read,
James Ignatowski."
338
00:17:31,483 --> 00:17:33,550
Hey, look at this,
there's a check...
339
00:17:33,617 --> 00:17:36,353
Hey, Jim, I don't want
to criticize your old man,
340
00:17:36,421 --> 00:17:37,855
but what good
is this check?
341
00:17:37,923 --> 00:17:40,290
I mean, he signed it, but he
forgot to fill in the amount.
342
00:17:40,358 --> 00:17:42,693
A blank check?
343
00:17:42,761 --> 00:17:43,994
(thump)
344
00:17:44,061 --> 00:17:45,829
Let me see that!
345
00:17:45,897 --> 00:17:48,165
You can't give a blank
check to Louie!
Give me that.
346
00:17:48,233 --> 00:17:50,033
That's okay, Elaine.
347
00:17:50,101 --> 00:17:53,036
Dad said Louie
348
00:17:53,104 --> 00:17:56,140
could make it out
for whatever amount
349
00:17:56,207 --> 00:17:59,376
he thought was fair.
350
00:17:59,444 --> 00:18:02,679
I told dad he could trust
your sense of honor.
351
00:18:05,750 --> 00:18:07,684
That he can.
352
00:18:13,258 --> 00:18:14,691
Would you believe it?
353
00:18:14,759 --> 00:18:17,093
I'm salivating.
354
00:18:17,161 --> 00:18:20,597
Ha, I'm actually salivating.
355
00:18:22,634 --> 00:18:24,635
Boss?
Yeah.
356
00:18:24,703 --> 00:18:26,570
Does that mean
you forgive me?
357
00:18:26,638 --> 00:18:27,971
I forgive you, Iggy.
358
00:18:28,039 --> 00:18:29,306
Can I have
my job back?
359
00:18:29,374 --> 00:18:30,774
You can have
your job back.
360
00:18:30,842 --> 00:18:32,409
Does it mean
you love me again?
361
00:18:32,511 --> 00:18:34,044
I didn't love you before.
362
00:18:34,111 --> 00:18:35,779
It's like old times.
363
00:18:37,782 --> 00:18:41,051
Boss, you just
make out that check
364
00:18:41,118 --> 00:18:43,053
for whatever
amount you want.
365
00:18:43,120 --> 00:18:44,087
Except...
366
00:18:44,256 --> 00:18:45,422
Except? What except?
367
00:18:45,490 --> 00:18:46,557
How come except?
368
00:18:46,625 --> 00:18:49,126
Except that I have
to call my dad,
369
00:18:49,193 --> 00:18:51,929
and tell him the amount
so he can cover it.
370
00:18:51,963 --> 00:18:53,830
Mmm.
371
00:18:53,899 --> 00:18:55,832
Yeah.
372
00:18:55,901 --> 00:18:57,968
All right.
373
00:18:58,035 --> 00:19:01,472
Ah, now I want complete silence
374
00:19:01,539 --> 00:19:05,342
while I figure out...
375
00:19:05,410 --> 00:19:07,344
the amount.
376
00:19:07,445 --> 00:19:10,047
(growling)
377
00:19:12,117 --> 00:19:14,184
(growling)
378
00:19:14,252 --> 00:19:16,420
Jim! Are you crazy?
379
00:19:16,488 --> 00:19:18,955
He's gonna fill that out
for a million dollars!
380
00:19:19,023 --> 00:19:21,792
That's why you're a cabdriver,
Reiger.
381
00:19:21,860 --> 00:19:24,795
If I fill this check out
for a million bucks,
382
00:19:24,863 --> 00:19:27,197
his dad would never cover it.
383
00:19:27,232 --> 00:19:28,966
But there is
a figure,
384
00:19:29,033 --> 00:19:31,969
an exact figure,
385
00:19:32,037 --> 00:19:34,972
one that's big enough
386
00:19:35,040 --> 00:19:37,007
so that he'll go...
387
00:19:37,075 --> 00:19:38,676
(shudders)
388
00:19:40,045 --> 00:19:44,982
...but not so big
that he won't say, "Well!"
389
00:19:46,551 --> 00:19:50,386
Why don't you try
the real figure,
$8,000 or $9,000?
390
00:19:50,454 --> 00:19:52,355
(laughs hysterically)
391
00:19:58,763 --> 00:20:00,730
ELAINE:
Look at him.
392
00:20:00,799 --> 00:20:03,133
Eight or nine,
eight or nine...
393
00:20:03,235 --> 00:20:05,402
Jim, why are
you laughing?
394
00:20:05,470 --> 00:20:07,704
'Cause the boss
is so happy.
395
00:20:07,772 --> 00:20:09,539
Yeah, yeah!
396
00:20:09,608 --> 00:20:11,508
Let's see what we got here,
Iggy.
397
00:20:11,576 --> 00:20:12,442
Come on.
398
00:20:12,510 --> 00:20:14,511
(mumbling)
399
00:20:14,579 --> 00:20:16,313
All right.
400
00:20:16,380 --> 00:20:17,414
All right, now.
401
00:20:17,482 --> 00:20:18,849
$50,000.
402
00:20:18,917 --> 00:20:20,651
No, no, no,
403
00:20:20,752 --> 00:20:22,285
that's too high,
that's too high.
404
00:20:22,353 --> 00:20:24,288
He'll never go
for that. Never.
405
00:20:24,389 --> 00:20:25,588
40... 48.
406
00:20:25,656 --> 00:20:27,925
If I say 48,
he'll think 50,
407
00:20:27,992 --> 00:20:29,759
and he won't
go for it.
Uh-huh.
408
00:20:29,828 --> 00:20:31,161
If I say 47,
409
00:20:31,229 --> 00:20:32,629
he'll think 48,
he'll think 50,
410
00:20:32,697 --> 00:20:33,931
he won't go for it.
411
00:20:33,999 --> 00:20:36,199
If I say 46,
he'll think 47,
412
00:20:36,267 --> 00:20:37,868
he'll think 48,
he'll think 50,
413
00:20:37,936 --> 00:20:39,302
he won't go for it.
414
00:20:39,370 --> 00:20:40,604
If I say 45,
415
00:20:40,606 --> 00:20:42,673
he'll say 46...
Louie!
416
00:20:42,740 --> 00:20:44,508
So, we rule
out the 40s.
417
00:20:46,244 --> 00:20:50,514
39,999.
418
00:20:50,582 --> 00:20:51,848
No!
419
00:20:51,916 --> 00:20:53,683
It's no good! It's too high.
420
00:20:53,751 --> 00:20:54,851
He'll go nuts.
421
00:20:54,919 --> 00:20:55,885
He won't pay it.
422
00:20:55,953 --> 00:20:56,920
All right.
423
00:20:56,988 --> 00:20:59,189
Now, let's see.
424
00:20:59,257 --> 00:21:02,392
$24,000.
425
00:21:02,460 --> 00:21:04,728
$8,000.
426
00:21:04,796 --> 00:21:06,396
In there,
427
00:21:06,464 --> 00:21:08,398
somewhere in there,
428
00:21:08,466 --> 00:21:11,034
24... eight.
429
00:21:11,136 --> 00:21:13,570
You know, in its own way,
this is kind of spellbinding.
430
00:21:14,405 --> 00:21:18,074
All right, $20,000...
431
00:21:18,142 --> 00:21:19,576
20,000...
432
00:21:19,644 --> 00:21:21,745
$26,000.
433
00:21:21,813 --> 00:21:23,446
Oh, wait a minute!
434
00:21:23,515 --> 00:21:24,715
14,000!
435
00:21:24,783 --> 00:21:26,850
And here,
436
00:21:26,918 --> 00:21:28,084
24.
437
00:21:28,152 --> 00:21:28,885
Wait!
438
00:21:29,020 --> 00:21:30,286
27,000!
439
00:21:30,354 --> 00:21:32,222
27,000, that's it!
440
00:21:32,324 --> 00:21:33,156
Call your father.
441
00:21:33,224 --> 00:21:35,358
$27,000. That's it!
442
00:21:35,360 --> 00:21:36,326
TONY:
Are you sure, Louie?
443
00:21:36,393 --> 00:21:38,295
I-I gotta see it on paper.
444
00:21:39,363 --> 00:21:42,299
$27,000.
445
00:21:42,366 --> 00:21:44,301
What's that look like to you,
Banta?
446
00:21:44,368 --> 00:21:47,371
I've never seen
that much money
in one place before.
447
00:21:47,438 --> 00:21:48,639
It's too much.
448
00:21:48,706 --> 00:21:50,407
He'll never pay that.
Wait! Wait!
449
00:21:50,474 --> 00:21:51,675
Wait! Wait.
450
00:21:51,743 --> 00:21:53,977
24,000...
451
00:21:54,045 --> 00:21:55,912
23,000...
452
00:21:55,980 --> 00:21:57,314
22,000...
453
00:21:57,382 --> 00:21:58,415
20...
454
00:21:58,417 --> 00:22:00,350
20...
455
00:22:00,418 --> 00:22:02,352
27,000! 27!
456
00:22:02,387 --> 00:22:04,354
It's what I said
the first time! 27.
457
00:22:04,389 --> 00:22:05,855
Tell him 27.
458
00:22:05,924 --> 00:22:07,724
27,000.
459
00:22:09,828 --> 00:22:11,595
29,000.
460
00:22:11,663 --> 00:22:14,264
29,000.
461
00:22:14,332 --> 00:22:16,433
540.
462
00:22:16,501 --> 00:22:19,436
540.
463
00:22:19,504 --> 00:22:21,738
That's right.
464
00:22:21,805 --> 00:22:23,873
Twenty-nine thousand...
465
00:22:23,941 --> 00:22:25,342
five hundred
and forty.
466
00:22:25,410 --> 00:22:26,610
Two!
Two!
467
00:22:26,612 --> 00:22:30,680
Uh, twenty-nine thousand
five hundred
468
00:22:30,749 --> 00:22:33,249
and forty-two.
469
00:22:34,585 --> 00:22:36,486
Okeydoke.
470
00:22:36,554 --> 00:22:37,754
Bye, Dad.
471
00:22:37,822 --> 00:22:40,757
Uh, Dad, I love you.
472
00:22:40,825 --> 00:22:41,925
(phone clicks)
473
00:22:41,993 --> 00:22:43,927
Hello?
474
00:22:44,996 --> 00:22:46,930
Hello?
475
00:22:48,900 --> 00:22:49,967
Huh? Did he okay it?
476
00:22:50,068 --> 00:22:51,868
He sure did, boss.
He okayed it!
477
00:22:51,936 --> 00:22:53,369
He okayed it!
Congratulations!
478
00:22:53,438 --> 00:22:55,605
He okayed it!
479
00:22:55,673 --> 00:22:58,475
Let's have three cheers
for the human torch!
480
00:22:58,543 --> 00:23:00,109
(three puffs)
481
00:23:01,446 --> 00:23:02,379
Phew!
482
00:23:02,447 --> 00:23:04,381
Boy, dad was relieved!
483
00:23:04,449 --> 00:23:06,550
He said he was afraid
484
00:23:06,617 --> 00:23:09,319
it was gonna be something
like $200,000.
485
00:23:09,387 --> 00:23:10,654
(grunts)
486
00:23:13,558 --> 00:23:14,557
Look at him.
487
00:23:14,625 --> 00:23:16,426
He's overcome with emotion,
488
00:23:16,493 --> 00:23:18,428
just like I am.
489
00:23:18,495 --> 00:23:19,897
Damn it!
490
00:23:19,964 --> 00:23:23,466
That kiss is gonna happen
sometimes, and you know it.
491
00:23:24,769 --> 00:23:26,903
Get over here.
492
00:23:26,971 --> 00:23:29,306
Come on, come on.
493
00:23:29,373 --> 00:23:30,540
Come on,
come on.
494
00:23:30,608 --> 00:23:32,676
Come on.
(mumbles) ...2,000.
495
00:23:32,678 --> 00:23:34,410
Let the world talk.
496
00:23:34,479 --> 00:23:36,212
Come on.
497
00:23:36,280 --> 00:23:38,048
Get away from me!
498
00:23:47,859 --> 00:23:50,427
(theme song playing)
499
00:24:13,618 --> 00:24:14,918
WOMAN:
Good night, Mr. Walters!
500
00:24:14,986 --> 00:24:15,986
(man grumbling)
32113
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