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1
00:00:10,010 --> 00:00:12,470
♪ La la la la la la ♪
2
00:00:12,554 --> 00:00:13,894
♪ Ooh ♪
3
00:00:13,972 --> 00:00:16,142
♪ Oh ♪
4
00:00:16,224 --> 00:00:19,484
[Carly Rae Jepsen]
♪ Whatever happened to predictability? ♪
5
00:00:19,561 --> 00:00:23,521
♪ The milkman, the paperboy
The evening TV ♪
6
00:00:23,606 --> 00:00:25,856
♪ Oh ♪
7
00:00:25,942 --> 00:00:27,902
♪ Everywhere you look ♪
8
00:00:27,986 --> 00:00:29,566
♪ Everywhere you go ♪
9
00:00:29,654 --> 00:00:33,534
♪ There's a heart, there's a heart
A hand to hold on to ♪
10
00:00:33,616 --> 00:00:36,486
♪ Everywhere you look
Everywhere you go ♪
11
00:00:36,578 --> 00:00:40,078
♪ There's a face, there's a face
Somebody who needs you ♪
12
00:00:40,165 --> 00:00:41,245
♪ There's a heart ♪
13
00:00:41,332 --> 00:00:44,172
♪ Everywhere you look, yeah ♪
14
00:00:44,252 --> 00:00:46,342
♪ When you're lost out there ♪
15
00:00:46,421 --> 00:00:48,301
♪ And you're all alone ♪
16
00:00:48,381 --> 00:00:53,511
♪ A light is waiting to carry you home ♪
17
00:00:53,595 --> 00:00:55,305
♪ Everywhere you look ♪
18
00:00:55,388 --> 00:00:57,308
♪ La la la la la la ♪
19
00:00:57,390 --> 00:00:59,270
♪ Oh ♪
20
00:01:03,354 --> 00:01:05,574
Who's that girl with all the fine moves?
21
00:01:06,316 --> 00:01:08,226
It's D.J. Can you dig it?
22
00:01:10,570 --> 00:01:11,780
Oh, I can dig it.
23
00:01:12,405 --> 00:01:13,405
Ooh.
24
00:01:22,040 --> 00:01:23,500
Oh, no.
25
00:01:23,583 --> 00:01:25,383
Are you two digging each other again?
26
00:01:27,337 --> 00:01:31,507
Hey. Your outfit for Moms' Night Out
better be in that laundry basket.
27
00:01:33,051 --> 00:01:34,261
Deej, I can't go.
28
00:01:34,344 --> 00:01:38,104
What? No, we made a plan.
Tonight, we are getting our freak on.
29
00:01:39,224 --> 00:01:41,234
Yeah, that's right. I said, "Freak on."
30
00:01:42,060 --> 00:01:43,520
At Club Euphoria.
31
00:01:43,603 --> 00:01:48,193
It's where the She-Wolf pack started,
and site of one of our greatest triumphs.
32
00:01:48,942 --> 00:01:52,152
Yeah, Grammy-winner Macy Gray
mistook us for lesbians.
33
00:01:53,321 --> 00:01:56,281
Well, not just lesbians. Dancing lesbians.
34
00:01:56,950 --> 00:01:58,490
Yeah, we won a contest.
35
00:01:59,160 --> 00:02:00,910
For dancing, not being lesbians.
36
00:02:02,455 --> 00:02:05,245
I was there, and it was great,
37
00:02:05,333 --> 00:02:08,093
but now I have a baby
and laundry to do.
38
00:02:08,169 --> 00:02:09,629
When did you become me?
39
00:02:11,339 --> 00:02:14,009
Oh, Mylanta. How could you say-- Ahh.
40
00:02:17,470 --> 00:02:18,640
I will be back in five.
41
00:02:21,516 --> 00:02:22,516
Knock knock.
42
00:02:25,061 --> 00:02:26,311
Hey, Matt. Hey, Rocki.
43
00:02:26,396 --> 00:02:28,186
Hello, Deej.
44
00:02:28,857 --> 00:02:31,357
Hello, Gia. It's really great to see you.
45
00:02:31,442 --> 00:02:34,112
Oh, that did not come across
as sarcastic as I was hoping.
46
00:02:35,113 --> 00:02:36,163
[door closes]
47
00:02:36,239 --> 00:02:38,699
Hi, Jackson's mom.
I'm gonna go talk to Ramona.
48
00:02:38,783 --> 00:02:41,623
Mm. Don't be impolite.
49
00:02:42,495 --> 00:02:44,365
Ask Rocki if she'd like a beverage.
50
00:02:46,374 --> 00:02:50,384
Sorry to interrupt, D.J.,
but... Gia and I need a little favor.
51
00:02:50,461 --> 00:02:53,761
Here it comes.
They want you to dispose of a body.
52
00:02:55,758 --> 00:02:58,928
When you have an SUV,
people always want you to move things.
53
00:03:00,638 --> 00:03:03,018
No. We need a document notarized.
54
00:03:03,099 --> 00:03:06,059
Oh. D.J. Fuller, Notary Public,
at your service.
55
00:03:08,146 --> 00:03:09,896
So, what'd you do with the body?
56
00:03:12,150 --> 00:03:13,190
There's no body.
57
00:03:14,402 --> 00:03:15,702
Ah, got it.
[clicks tongue]
58
00:03:17,697 --> 00:03:18,947
You guys are good.
59
00:03:20,575 --> 00:03:22,905
You are in luck.
I just got a brand-new notary stamp,
60
00:03:22,994 --> 00:03:25,544
and I have been dying to take this baby
out for a spin.
61
00:03:26,831 --> 00:03:28,791
Just when I think
you weren't dorky enough,
62
00:03:28,875 --> 00:03:30,745
now I find out you're a notary public?
63
00:03:32,128 --> 00:03:36,218
It is so sad how women
put down other women in power.
64
00:03:38,009 --> 00:03:39,389
You stamp a piece of paper.
65
00:03:40,053 --> 00:03:43,603
I am an official of
the State of California. I took an oath.
66
00:03:43,681 --> 00:03:45,731
Did you? I didn't think so.
67
00:03:47,518 --> 00:03:50,648
So what needs notarizing?
Promissory note? Bank form?
68
00:03:50,730 --> 00:03:53,150
I know this is kind of a weird way
to break the news,
69
00:03:53,233 --> 00:03:55,403
but... a marriage license.
70
00:03:55,485 --> 00:03:56,485
We got married!
71
00:03:57,695 --> 00:03:58,695
To who?
72
00:04:01,449 --> 00:04:04,909
Oh, wow! Congratulations.
73
00:04:04,994 --> 00:04:08,084
That was a really fast engagement.
Like... uh, none.
74
00:04:08,957 --> 00:04:11,627
Well, interesting story.
75
00:04:11,709 --> 00:04:14,129
Lil' Bun and I are in Vegas,
and we thought,
76
00:04:14,212 --> 00:04:16,762
"We love each other.
Why not get married?"
77
00:04:19,050 --> 00:04:20,590
So what's the interesting part?
78
00:04:22,720 --> 00:04:25,350
Well, good for you.
79
00:04:26,099 --> 00:04:27,929
What is this, your third marriage?
80
00:04:28,017 --> 00:04:29,977
-Fourth.
-Fourth! Ahem.
81
00:04:31,646 --> 00:04:33,186
Oh, look at you two.
82
00:04:33,273 --> 00:04:35,943
Learning new stuff
about each other every day.
83
00:04:37,777 --> 00:04:41,107
Well, they do say
fourth time is the charm.
84
00:04:41,197 --> 00:04:43,907
[chuckles] Not often, but I've heard it.
85
00:04:46,828 --> 00:04:50,668
Your mom ran off and married Matt in Vegas
while you were at volleyball camp?
86
00:04:50,748 --> 00:04:53,538
I thought the most embarrassing thing
they were gonna do in Vegas
87
00:04:53,626 --> 00:04:54,706
is go see Carrot Top.
88
00:04:56,796 --> 00:04:57,876
Which they also did.
89
00:04:59,090 --> 00:05:01,010
Oof. Prop comics.
90
00:05:01,092 --> 00:05:02,302
[Rocki] Mm.
91
00:05:03,386 --> 00:05:05,756
So, now I'm on to stepdad number three.
92
00:05:05,847 --> 00:05:08,427
I don't even bother to learn
their last names anymore.
93
00:05:08,516 --> 00:05:09,726
Really?
94
00:05:09,809 --> 00:05:12,189
On second thought, maybe I should
95
00:05:12,270 --> 00:05:15,110
so I can forge his signature
to get out of detention.
96
00:05:15,189 --> 00:05:16,859
[both laugh]
97
00:05:16,941 --> 00:05:18,821
My parents have been engaged so long,
98
00:05:18,901 --> 00:05:21,701
five of my favorite shows
have been canceled and rebooted.
99
00:05:23,281 --> 00:05:26,161
Hey, Ramo-- Oh.
100
00:05:26,242 --> 00:05:27,622
Rocki.
101
00:05:27,702 --> 00:05:29,082
What's up, Fuller?
102
00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:32,082
What's up is I haven't seen you
since the hospital,
103
00:05:32,165 --> 00:05:35,035
where you held my hand
and then never called me.
104
00:05:36,419 --> 00:05:38,129
Call you? Why?
105
00:05:39,547 --> 00:05:43,377
Wait. You didn't think that meant
we were back together, did you?
106
00:05:43,468 --> 00:05:45,348
No-o-o-o-o.
107
00:05:45,428 --> 00:05:46,928
[chuckles]
108
00:05:47,013 --> 00:05:49,023
[coughs] I'm parched.
109
00:05:49,098 --> 00:05:52,018
I'm gonna get myself... out of the room.
110
00:05:52,101 --> 00:05:53,441
[coughs]
111
00:05:55,605 --> 00:05:58,315
I was worried
you thought we were back together.
112
00:05:59,776 --> 00:06:02,696
Because of one stupid handhold?
113
00:06:02,779 --> 00:06:04,699
-Right? Heh.
-Hmm.
114
00:06:04,781 --> 00:06:07,581
-Now that we're back to being broken up--
-We were never not.
115
00:06:09,827 --> 00:06:11,497
Okay, good.
116
00:06:12,205 --> 00:06:14,205
Glad we got that straightened out.
117
00:06:16,042 --> 00:06:17,542
You know, I'm-I'm parched, too.
118
00:06:17,627 --> 00:06:19,547
[laughs and coughs]
119
00:06:22,673 --> 00:06:24,763
This is wonderful news!
120
00:06:25,426 --> 00:06:27,426
The lovebirds
have made their nest official.
121
00:06:29,972 --> 00:06:32,182
Actually, my girlfriend made it official.
122
00:06:32,266 --> 00:06:34,266
That's her notary stamp right there.
123
00:06:35,978 --> 00:06:38,018
You know what that notary stamp
does to me.
124
00:06:39,190 --> 00:06:41,690
Just wait until
I take your thumbprint, sailor.
125
00:06:43,903 --> 00:06:45,453
All right, before I change my mind,
126
00:06:45,530 --> 00:06:47,570
let's go do Moms' Night Out
at Club Euphoria.
127
00:06:47,657 --> 00:06:50,157
Oh, you guys are doing Mom's Night Out?
128
00:06:50,243 --> 00:06:51,833
Gia, you should go with them.
129
00:06:52,453 --> 00:06:56,583
Hmm. Sounds like a fun place
for my bridal shower you never threw me.
130
00:06:58,751 --> 00:07:00,291
Oh, Matt, look at you,
131
00:07:00,378 --> 00:07:03,168
marrying Gia
and suggesting she come out with us.
132
00:07:03,256 --> 00:07:05,126
You are just full of great decisions.
133
00:07:07,093 --> 00:07:09,513
[stammers] You guys got married?
134
00:07:09,595 --> 00:07:11,465
Wow, how long did I take to get dressed?
135
00:07:12,932 --> 00:07:15,692
You stop to shave your legs,
you miss a lot of drama.
136
00:07:16,894 --> 00:07:18,194
I can stick around here.
137
00:07:18,271 --> 00:07:21,271
It'll give me a chance to bond with Rocki,
who is my stepdaughter.
138
00:07:21,941 --> 00:07:24,031
Wow, I have a stepdaughter.
139
00:07:24,110 --> 00:07:26,650
[inhales] I've never even
had a houseplant.
140
00:07:28,156 --> 00:07:30,946
All right, let's do this, She-Wolf pack.
141
00:07:31,033 --> 00:07:32,663
And Gia.
142
00:07:32,743 --> 00:07:34,543
All right. Baby monitor.
143
00:07:34,620 --> 00:07:35,750
-Drive safe.
-Don't wait up.
144
00:07:35,830 --> 00:07:36,660
[overlapping chatter]
145
00:07:36,747 --> 00:07:38,827
Thank you guys so much
for watching the baby.
146
00:07:38,916 --> 00:07:41,246
-Don't worry about it. Be safe.
-See you later.
147
00:07:41,335 --> 00:07:44,505
It does not seem fair that the ladies
get to shake their groove things
148
00:07:44,589 --> 00:07:46,589
while our groove things remain unshaken.
149
00:07:48,468 --> 00:07:50,718
If Gia's getting a party,
Matt should, too.
150
00:07:52,513 --> 00:07:53,603
Let's get turnt.
151
00:07:55,975 --> 00:07:58,435
I know. Let's go to Club Euphoria.
152
00:07:58,519 --> 00:08:00,899
Fernando, you guys are babysitting,
153
00:08:00,980 --> 00:08:04,190
and I'm trying to spend quality time
with my stepdaughter.
154
00:08:04,275 --> 00:08:05,275
Still weird to say.
155
00:08:06,903 --> 00:08:08,743
[yells] Mom, can we go?
156
00:08:08,821 --> 00:08:10,241
Oh, hey, Rocki.
157
00:08:10,323 --> 00:08:14,083
Um, your mom just went out,
but if you don't mind hanging here a bit,
158
00:08:14,160 --> 00:08:17,370
it might give you and I
a chance to get to know each other better.
159
00:08:17,455 --> 00:08:21,415
Great. Nothing like an awkward night
with my ex-boyfriend
160
00:08:21,501 --> 00:08:23,381
and my new stepdad who wants to bond.
161
00:08:25,254 --> 00:08:26,344
Yahoo.
162
00:08:28,925 --> 00:08:29,925
That failed.
163
00:08:31,969 --> 00:08:33,469
We should go to Club Euphoria.
164
00:08:35,556 --> 00:08:37,226
Sit your groove thing down.
165
00:08:40,394 --> 00:08:42,274
♪ Ooh-ooh-ee-ooh ♪
166
00:08:45,191 --> 00:08:47,441
There, Gia's bridal shower.
167
00:08:47,527 --> 00:08:50,947
Happy? You're lucky
I always carry toilet paper in my purse.
168
00:08:52,532 --> 00:08:54,952
She's being modest.
She also carries seat covers.
169
00:08:56,869 --> 00:09:01,169
Come on, guys. Let's have a great time
celebrating the new mom, the new bride.
170
00:09:01,249 --> 00:09:02,879
And D.J.'s new notary stamp.
171
00:09:02,959 --> 00:09:05,919
Ah. But first, we She-Wolf howl.
172
00:09:06,003 --> 00:09:07,803
Yeah, I don't do that.
173
00:09:08,756 --> 00:09:10,046
Nobody asked you to.
174
00:09:11,467 --> 00:09:12,637
It's kind of our thing.
175
00:09:12,718 --> 00:09:14,678
Good 'cause I don't do that.
176
00:09:15,304 --> 00:09:17,604
Good 'cause we don't want you to do that.
177
00:09:19,016 --> 00:09:22,306
Are-Are we gonna howl, or are we just
gonna argue about who gets to howl?
178
00:09:23,479 --> 00:09:27,229
[howling]
179
00:09:27,316 --> 00:09:28,356
[howling trails off]
180
00:09:28,442 --> 00:09:30,442
[mellow music playing]
181
00:09:31,696 --> 00:09:33,946
What happened to our Club Euphoria?
182
00:09:34,532 --> 00:09:36,622
It's more like Club Eu-bore-ia.
183
00:09:38,077 --> 00:09:40,617
There's no band. There's no dancing.
184
00:09:40,705 --> 00:09:42,955
I see three guys in Dockers, and...
185
00:09:43,040 --> 00:09:45,170
one of them's eating
an egg-salad sandwich.
186
00:09:47,086 --> 00:09:50,966
[sighs] Thanks for ruining
my bridal shower, Deej.
187
00:09:52,174 --> 00:09:53,884
Well, at least you got a sash.
188
00:09:57,138 --> 00:09:59,718
[singers scat]
189
00:09:59,807 --> 00:10:03,137
Here's to you, man. May you and Gia
have a wonderful life together.
190
00:10:03,227 --> 00:10:04,057
Thank you.
191
00:10:04,145 --> 00:10:08,265
May your marriage be as exciting
as our night tonight at Club Euphoria.
192
00:10:08,357 --> 00:10:09,477
Where we're not going.
193
00:10:11,736 --> 00:10:14,606
May your marriage
be as disappointing as my evening.
194
00:10:16,657 --> 00:10:17,947
-Cheers.
-Cheers.
195
00:10:18,034 --> 00:10:20,084
-Cheers.
-Thank you.
196
00:10:20,661 --> 00:10:22,711
This is my first Dudes' Night In.
197
00:10:22,788 --> 00:10:25,288
Are you sure I can have apple juice
after 6:00 p.m.?
198
00:10:26,083 --> 00:10:29,343
Hey, it's Dudes' Night In.
There are no rules.
199
00:10:29,420 --> 00:10:31,260
Just make sure you use a coaster.
200
00:10:32,548 --> 00:10:36,298
You know, Steve,
Mom's not here, and our show is on...
201
00:10:36,969 --> 00:10:39,389
and we're all tired
of hearing Fernando complain.
202
00:10:41,557 --> 00:10:44,887
When D.J.'s not around, Max and I
have a special show we like to watch.
203
00:10:44,977 --> 00:10:48,397
It's violent, disturbing,
and a little vulgar.
204
00:10:48,481 --> 00:10:49,441
UFC Fight Night?
205
00:10:49,523 --> 00:10:51,153
Real Housewives.
206
00:10:51,233 --> 00:10:53,283
Ooh, you guys are hard-core.
207
00:10:56,781 --> 00:10:59,621
["Real Housewives" playing]
208
00:10:59,700 --> 00:11:01,870
Wow. You and Max
have such a great relationship.
209
00:11:01,952 --> 00:11:03,952
I really just want that with Rocki.
210
00:11:04,038 --> 00:11:07,208
Well, you gotta give it time.
Besides, it wasn't always like this.
211
00:11:07,291 --> 00:11:09,881
Last year, the kid
was not a big fan of mine,
212
00:11:09,960 --> 00:11:11,500
and I was terrified of him.
213
00:11:13,172 --> 00:11:17,262
I know, right? That kid is really scary
when he wears a three-piece suit.
214
00:11:19,970 --> 00:11:21,720
I can't not think of The Omen.
215
00:11:23,974 --> 00:11:25,984
[sinister music playing]
216
00:11:32,483 --> 00:11:34,493
[mellow music playing]
217
00:11:39,573 --> 00:11:43,413
I thought I recognized this music.
They play it at my dermatologist's office.
218
00:11:45,287 --> 00:11:47,327
You know why no one's on the dance floor?
219
00:11:47,415 --> 00:11:49,205
Because no one wants to be the first.
220
00:11:51,669 --> 00:11:54,169
So I say let's be the first.
221
00:11:56,424 --> 00:11:58,054
Come on, She-Wolf pack and Gia.
222
00:11:58,134 --> 00:11:59,144
All right.
223
00:12:07,852 --> 00:12:09,982
Ah, see? Look what we started.
224
00:12:10,062 --> 00:12:11,022
I'll tell ya--
225
00:12:11,105 --> 00:12:13,435
the par-tay.
226
00:12:15,067 --> 00:12:17,487
You can't dance.
227
00:12:17,570 --> 00:12:18,860
Oh.
228
00:12:18,946 --> 00:12:22,116
[laughs] What have we here,
a dance challenge?
229
00:12:22,867 --> 00:12:24,117
Are the boys in the yard?
230
00:12:24,201 --> 00:12:26,121
'Cause my milkshake's gon' bring 'em.
231
00:12:30,541 --> 00:12:31,541
Look, ma'am.
232
00:12:31,625 --> 00:12:35,495
I'm the manager,
and dancing is illegal here.
233
00:12:35,588 --> 00:12:37,298
As is whatever that was.
234
00:12:39,091 --> 00:12:41,641
Illegal? Well,
that doesn't make any sense.
235
00:12:41,719 --> 00:12:44,099
This is Club Euphoria,
home of the weekly dance-off.
236
00:12:44,180 --> 00:12:45,180
Not anymore.
237
00:12:45,264 --> 00:12:49,644
The city revoked our cabaret license
due to noise violations.
238
00:12:49,727 --> 00:12:52,477
Apparently it's illegal
to drop it like it's hot.
239
00:12:55,024 --> 00:12:56,034
Oh.
240
00:12:56,692 --> 00:12:59,492
Well, let's just call it a night, then.
241
00:13:01,947 --> 00:13:04,327
I do wanna thank you
for making me go out tonight.
242
00:13:05,367 --> 00:13:07,157
Aw, this night stinks.
243
00:13:07,828 --> 00:13:10,788
Yeah, worse than that guy's
egg-salad sandwich.
244
00:13:12,708 --> 00:13:14,918
Come on, guy! Eat that in the car!
245
00:13:19,715 --> 00:13:22,715
Look, Gia, I'm sorry
I, uh, ruined your bridal shower.
246
00:13:23,427 --> 00:13:25,427
But, eh, we're not that close, anyway.
247
00:13:25,513 --> 00:13:27,433
Listen... Deej...
248
00:13:28,182 --> 00:13:31,942
I know I don't have the best track record
with this whole marriage thing, but...
249
00:13:32,686 --> 00:13:35,106
I really want this to work.
250
00:13:35,189 --> 00:13:36,609
I love Matt.
251
00:13:38,567 --> 00:13:40,067
I am really happy to hear that.
252
00:13:40,986 --> 00:13:44,236
Because Matt's a great guy,
and he deserves to be happy.
253
00:13:45,282 --> 00:13:46,702
And so do you.
254
00:13:47,868 --> 00:13:49,748
Are you trying to get me to hug you?
255
00:13:52,039 --> 00:13:54,379
Yeah, let's get out of here before you do.
256
00:13:56,502 --> 00:13:57,712
[Stephanie gasps]
257
00:14:03,926 --> 00:14:05,886
Maks? Val?
258
00:14:06,512 --> 00:14:08,892
Is it true? Is it them?
259
00:14:11,183 --> 00:14:14,443
-It is they.
-[both] Our favorite dancing partners.
260
00:14:14,520 --> 00:14:17,110
It's sisters and brothers
and whoever you are.
261
00:14:18,566 --> 00:14:21,396
♪ Hey, hey, ooh-ooh ♪
262
00:14:21,485 --> 00:14:23,735
So I met this new guy
from Postmates--Ethan.
263
00:14:23,821 --> 00:14:25,661
Huh. I've been ordering burritos.
264
00:14:25,739 --> 00:14:27,699
I didn't know you could order a boyfriend.
265
00:14:30,452 --> 00:14:33,872
Don't mind me.
I'm just a guy holding a Popsicle stick.
266
00:14:34,957 --> 00:14:37,457
Doesn't mean I think the Popsicle
is my girlfriend.
267
00:14:40,671 --> 00:14:43,011
Just grabbing snacks.
268
00:14:43,090 --> 00:14:45,340
Unless you wanna hang,
'cause I'm here if you do.
269
00:14:45,426 --> 00:14:47,046
No, I'm good.
270
00:14:48,470 --> 00:14:49,930
All right. You sure?
271
00:14:50,014 --> 00:14:52,774
'Cause you and I really haven't had
a lot of time to catch up.
272
00:14:53,517 --> 00:14:56,187
Ramona ordered a boyfriend on Postmates,
273
00:14:56,270 --> 00:14:58,650
and Jackson's not dating a Popsicle stick.
274
00:15:00,232 --> 00:15:01,192
You're all caught up.
275
00:15:03,444 --> 00:15:06,324
Okay. Well, if you wanna know
a fun fact about me...
276
00:15:07,156 --> 00:15:10,366
I'm from Florida,
home of Disney World and boy bands.
277
00:15:12,661 --> 00:15:13,751
Wow, so fun.
278
00:15:17,541 --> 00:15:18,751
Why don't we talk later?
279
00:15:21,128 --> 00:15:23,588
Wow, that was harsh.
280
00:15:24,381 --> 00:15:25,801
If that bothered you, Fuller,
281
00:15:25,883 --> 00:15:28,393
there's a guy out there from Florida
ready to talk.
282
00:15:30,471 --> 00:15:32,221
I'm gonna take these chips and go.
283
00:15:34,141 --> 00:15:37,651
It seems like the guy just wants to
connect with you, and you shut him down.
284
00:15:38,979 --> 00:15:40,979
I need a water
'cause these chips are very salty.
285
00:15:41,065 --> 00:15:42,775
And yet, I still keep eating them.
286
00:15:47,196 --> 00:15:49,526
I think you should know that Matt
is a super-decent guy.
287
00:15:49,615 --> 00:15:52,485
Like, once, my whole family
got sick from doughnut poisoning,
288
00:15:52,576 --> 00:15:55,076
and Matt nursed us all back to health.
289
00:15:55,955 --> 00:15:58,455
I didn't eat another doughnut for days.
290
00:16:00,376 --> 00:16:02,166
That is a really touching story...
291
00:16:02,878 --> 00:16:05,628
but you don't know anything
about me or my family.
292
00:16:07,800 --> 00:16:08,800
I guess I don't.
293
00:16:10,260 --> 00:16:13,720
Neither does Matt,
and I think we'd both like to.
294
00:16:15,265 --> 00:16:17,635
Sorry. Now I need something sweet.
295
00:16:24,984 --> 00:16:29,074
♪ Ah-ah-ah-ah ♪
296
00:16:29,154 --> 00:16:31,994
-Hey, so how'd it go with Rocki?
-Ach, not great.
297
00:16:32,074 --> 00:16:33,914
You know, I haven't had
a 16-year-old girl
298
00:16:33,993 --> 00:16:36,163
work this hard to ignore me
since I was 16.
299
00:16:37,997 --> 00:16:42,207
I can't blame her. She hardly knows me.
Now I'm just supposed to be her dad?
300
00:16:42,292 --> 00:16:44,382
No. No one's saying
you're supposed to be her dad.
301
00:16:44,461 --> 00:16:47,301
You just gotta let her know, though,
that you aren't the enemy.
302
00:16:47,881 --> 00:16:49,341
Will you tell her for me?
303
00:16:51,427 --> 00:16:54,557
No. Only you can have that talk with her.
304
00:16:55,222 --> 00:16:58,482
Wow. Shockingly, Fernando's right.
305
00:16:58,559 --> 00:17:00,269
[TV show continues]
306
00:17:00,352 --> 00:17:03,942
Phew. I wasn't sure myself,
but I said it with great confidence.
307
00:17:05,774 --> 00:17:08,194
You can do this, man. We believe in you.
308
00:17:08,277 --> 00:17:09,277
Okay.
309
00:17:11,780 --> 00:17:15,160
Well, it looks like Dudes' Night In
is breaking up.
310
00:17:16,994 --> 00:17:18,914
Fine. Just go to Club Euphoria.
311
00:17:18,996 --> 00:17:22,746
No, I couldn't leave you
with the children and the baby
312
00:17:22,833 --> 00:17:25,923
and the emotional turmoil. No.
313
00:17:26,003 --> 00:17:28,173
But if you insist, I-I will go.
314
00:17:29,590 --> 00:17:30,840
You do insist, don't you?
315
00:17:32,009 --> 00:17:33,009
Because I'm going.
316
00:17:39,224 --> 00:17:41,484
-[door closes]
-He knows how to leave a room.
317
00:17:43,645 --> 00:17:45,435
Ethan's such an environmentalist.
318
00:17:45,522 --> 00:17:47,572
His sneakers are made from
recycled bottle caps,
319
00:17:47,649 --> 00:17:50,069
and his jeans
are made from recycled sneakers.
320
00:17:51,653 --> 00:17:53,663
Hey, Rocki, can I talk to you for a sec?
321
00:17:53,739 --> 00:17:55,699
Is it another fun fact about Florida?
322
00:17:57,242 --> 00:17:59,832
Let me guess.
You found an alligator in your pool.
323
00:18:01,997 --> 00:18:05,377
Look, Rocki, I get why
you don't want to be around me,
324
00:18:05,459 --> 00:18:09,379
but just know that this situation's
weird for both of us.
325
00:18:12,925 --> 00:18:13,925
And me.
326
00:18:16,053 --> 00:18:17,053
Bye!
327
00:18:19,264 --> 00:18:22,854
Look, we barely know each other,
and now I'm your stepdad.
328
00:18:23,435 --> 00:18:24,555
Number three.
329
00:18:24,645 --> 00:18:28,185
Three? Right, yes.
I learned that fun fact tonight.
330
00:18:29,399 --> 00:18:32,569
But seriously, you know,
I just want you to know that...
331
00:18:34,113 --> 00:18:36,283
I really do love your mom, you know?
332
00:18:36,365 --> 00:18:38,275
And... I'm not going anywhere.
333
00:18:39,284 --> 00:18:41,334
I'm in it for the long haul.
334
00:18:41,411 --> 00:18:44,041
-We'll see.
-And I want you to know
335
00:18:44,123 --> 00:18:47,793
that I have zero intention
of coming between you and your mom.
336
00:18:47,876 --> 00:18:50,746
I mean, it's clear you guys
are super-close, which is rad,
337
00:18:50,838 --> 00:18:53,418
and nothing is gonna change that.
Definitely not me.
338
00:18:56,510 --> 00:19:00,220
I'm sorry. I know you've probably
heard this stuff from your other stepdads.
339
00:19:01,849 --> 00:19:02,849
Actually...
340
00:19:03,851 --> 00:19:05,391
you're, like, the first one
341
00:19:05,477 --> 00:19:08,017
who's ever had
a real conversation with me.
342
00:19:10,232 --> 00:19:11,402
So...
343
00:19:12,609 --> 00:19:15,359
I guess we're off to a decent start.
344
00:19:16,780 --> 00:19:17,910
Decent's good.
345
00:19:20,450 --> 00:19:22,910
Um... just one question.
346
00:19:22,995 --> 00:19:23,995
Anything.
347
00:19:25,831 --> 00:19:27,121
What's your last name?
348
00:19:30,002 --> 00:19:33,422
And then Bethany accused Dorinda
of calling the countess a drunk.
349
00:19:33,505 --> 00:19:35,125
Which the countess denied,
350
00:19:35,215 --> 00:19:38,335
even while she was doing
a Jager shot while in rehab.
351
00:19:39,845 --> 00:19:43,465
No, that was the vacation to Mexico,
where she fell in the bushes.
352
00:19:43,557 --> 00:19:44,637
[both] Twice!
353
00:19:47,227 --> 00:19:50,107
This is so anti-feminist, anti-humanist.
354
00:19:50,189 --> 00:19:51,109
[thunk]
355
00:19:52,274 --> 00:19:54,944
Did that lady just throw her fake leg
at a dinner party?
356
00:19:56,945 --> 00:19:58,735
I love this show.
357
00:20:07,414 --> 00:20:08,874
Oh.
358
00:20:08,957 --> 00:20:09,957
What'd I miss?
359
00:20:10,042 --> 00:20:12,842
They just had a visit
with the doctor who freezes fat.
360
00:20:15,339 --> 00:20:16,839
I think you're right, Fuller.
361
00:20:16,924 --> 00:20:18,014
Matt's okay.
362
00:20:19,593 --> 00:20:20,643
Is this a trap?
363
00:20:22,304 --> 00:20:25,144
No. Shockingly, you helped me.
364
00:20:25,849 --> 00:20:28,729
You convinced me
to give someone a second chance,
365
00:20:28,810 --> 00:20:31,610
so I wanna give us a second chance.
366
00:20:31,688 --> 00:20:32,688
Wait. Really?
367
00:20:33,523 --> 00:20:35,153
Yeah, I want to get back together.
368
00:20:35,234 --> 00:20:38,204
-We were never broken up.
-What?
369
00:20:40,197 --> 00:20:41,867
I miss messing with you, Fuller.
370
00:20:44,868 --> 00:20:47,328
♪ Ooh-ooh-ooh ♪
371
00:20:47,412 --> 00:20:49,872
Oh, we are so happy you are here.
372
00:20:49,957 --> 00:20:52,957
We're so happy that you are happy
that we're here, too.
373
00:20:54,378 --> 00:20:56,418
-Come on, ladies.
-And Gia.
374
00:20:56,505 --> 00:20:58,795
We got our dancing shoes on.
375
00:20:58,882 --> 00:21:02,182
And our dancing socks.
That's two layers of dance.
376
00:21:02,261 --> 00:21:03,511
Let's hit the floor.
377
00:21:03,595 --> 00:21:05,965
-[chuckling]
-Wait, wait, wait. Bad news.
378
00:21:06,056 --> 00:21:09,386
There's no more dancing
at Club Euphoria. It's illegal.
379
00:21:09,476 --> 00:21:12,346
She means forbidden, like the Lambada.
380
00:21:14,523 --> 00:21:15,613
No. No, no, no.
381
00:21:15,691 --> 00:21:17,821
There was trouble, and, um...
382
00:21:18,443 --> 00:21:21,363
now dancing here is against the law.
383
00:21:21,446 --> 00:21:22,656
Like the movie.
384
00:21:22,739 --> 00:21:23,739
You mean Footloose?
385
00:21:23,824 --> 00:21:25,914
No. The Man Who Lose Their Foot
386
00:21:25,993 --> 00:21:28,373
Because Of Bureaucratic Rules
Against Dancing.
387
00:21:29,830 --> 00:21:31,620
It had a different title back in Ukraine.
388
00:21:32,582 --> 00:21:35,842
Right. Uh, well, anyway,
we're on our way out, so...
389
00:21:36,420 --> 00:21:37,590
No, we're not.
390
00:21:38,547 --> 00:21:40,587
Because Val and Maks are here,
391
00:21:40,674 --> 00:21:44,894
and that means tonight, we dance!
392
00:21:50,392 --> 00:21:52,642
Why did I choose this week to get married?
393
00:21:54,938 --> 00:21:56,268
[clinking]
394
00:21:56,356 --> 00:21:59,566
Attention, people of Club Euphoria.
395
00:22:01,611 --> 00:22:03,821
Give me something inspirational,
Mr. Piano Man.
396
00:22:03,905 --> 00:22:05,985
[playing
"The Battle Hymn of the Republic"]
397
00:22:07,326 --> 00:22:11,366
Like the air we breathe,
we need dance to live.
398
00:22:13,999 --> 00:22:16,039
Especially us, because we're moms,
399
00:22:16,126 --> 00:22:19,546
and that means we hardly ever
have time for ourselves.
400
00:22:19,629 --> 00:22:21,419
Once I was so tired,
401
00:22:21,506 --> 00:22:24,176
I went to work
with my dress on inside out.
402
00:22:25,677 --> 00:22:29,177
So when us moms
finally have a night to ourselves,
403
00:22:29,264 --> 00:22:31,104
we need to make the most of it.
404
00:22:31,683 --> 00:22:34,063
And that means dancing at Club Euphoria!
405
00:22:39,816 --> 00:22:42,276
That was a beautiful speech.
406
00:22:42,361 --> 00:22:45,111
But it's out of my hands.
Take it up with the law.
407
00:22:48,450 --> 00:22:49,910
I am the law!
408
00:22:51,828 --> 00:22:54,918
As a court-appointed officer
of the State of California...
409
00:22:55,624 --> 00:22:57,334
by stamping this official napkin,
410
00:22:57,417 --> 00:23:01,457
I hereby declare dancing legal
at Club Euphoria!
411
00:23:01,546 --> 00:23:03,966
[all cheering]
412
00:23:04,049 --> 00:23:06,759
["Footloose" plays]
413
00:23:08,762 --> 00:23:11,312
Does a notary even have that authority?
414
00:23:11,390 --> 00:23:13,430
No, no, but just roll with it,
415
00:23:13,517 --> 00:23:16,307
'cause it's the closest
my sister's ever come to breaking bad.
416
00:23:16,978 --> 00:23:19,818
The party starts when Fernando arrives!
417
00:23:22,317 --> 00:23:24,527
Which is now, for I...
418
00:23:25,946 --> 00:23:26,946
am here.
419
00:23:30,826 --> 00:23:32,786
[both] Ew, Fernando.
420
00:23:34,955 --> 00:23:36,825
We do not like Fernando.
421
00:23:36,915 --> 00:23:39,375
[stutters] Actually, we like him now.
422
00:23:39,459 --> 00:23:40,709
Yeah, we're together again.
423
00:23:40,794 --> 00:23:42,844
Well, then we like Fernando.
424
00:23:43,547 --> 00:23:44,877
And he can dance with us.
425
00:23:46,174 --> 00:23:47,684
Just not as well as us.
426
00:23:49,302 --> 00:23:51,262
[Kenny Loggins]
♪ Now I gotta cut loose ♪
427
00:23:51,346 --> 00:23:52,636
♪ Footloose ♪
428
00:23:52,722 --> 00:23:54,932
♪ Kick off your Sunday shoes ♪
429
00:23:55,642 --> 00:23:57,732
♪ Please, Louise ♪
430
00:23:58,395 --> 00:24:00,395
♪ Pull me off of my knees ♪
431
00:24:01,106 --> 00:24:02,856
♪ Jack, get back ♪
432
00:24:03,900 --> 00:24:05,820
♪ Come on before we crack ♪
433
00:24:06,653 --> 00:24:08,913
♪ Lose your blues ♪
434
00:24:09,448 --> 00:24:11,278
♪ Everybody cut footloose ♪
435
00:24:11,366 --> 00:24:12,576
[woman] Come on, girls.
436
00:24:14,077 --> 00:24:15,157
♪ Footloose ♪
437
00:24:16,663 --> 00:24:19,463
♪ You got to turn me around ♪
438
00:24:19,541 --> 00:24:22,091
♪ And put your feet on the ground ♪
439
00:24:22,169 --> 00:24:25,129
♪ Gotta take ahold of your soul ♪
440
00:24:34,514 --> 00:24:36,604
♪ I'm turning it loose ♪
441
00:24:36,683 --> 00:24:38,063
-♪ Footloose ♪
-♪ Footloose ♪
442
00:24:38,143 --> 00:24:40,313
♪ Kick off your Sunday shoes ♪
443
00:24:41,062 --> 00:24:43,152
♪ Please, Louise ♪
444
00:24:43,857 --> 00:24:45,567
♪ Pull me off of my knees ♪
445
00:24:46,776 --> 00:24:48,526
♪ Jack, get back ♪
446
00:24:49,070 --> 00:24:51,320
♪ Come on before we crack ♪
447
00:24:52,115 --> 00:24:54,115
♪ Lose your blues ♪
448
00:24:54,784 --> 00:24:56,794
♪ Everybody cut footloose ♪
449
00:24:58,997 --> 00:25:00,247
[song ends]
450
00:25:04,044 --> 00:25:05,054
[song resumes]
451
00:25:06,671 --> 00:25:09,721
Thanks for throwing me
a great bridal shower, Deej.
452
00:25:09,799 --> 00:25:11,049
Aw!
453
00:25:11,134 --> 00:25:12,554
Better be your last one.
454
00:25:14,262 --> 00:25:16,262
♪ Oh, Milo ♪
455
00:25:16,932 --> 00:25:18,852
♪ Come on, come on, let's go ♪
456
00:25:19,809 --> 00:25:21,769
♪ Lose your blues ♪
457
00:25:21,853 --> 00:25:23,863
[laughter and overlapping chatter]
458
00:25:26,691 --> 00:25:29,651
That was the best Girls' Night Out ever.
459
00:25:29,736 --> 00:25:30,566
Yeah.
460
00:25:32,614 --> 00:25:34,164
Should we howl, She-Wolf pack?
461
00:25:35,200 --> 00:25:36,200
And Gia?
462
00:25:37,244 --> 00:25:38,254
And Gia.
463
00:25:39,120 --> 00:25:40,370
And Fernando?
464
00:25:40,455 --> 00:25:42,415
And Fernando!
465
00:25:43,458 --> 00:25:45,538
[howling]
466
00:25:47,337 --> 00:25:50,257
-[howling trails off]
-Oh.
467
00:25:52,092 --> 00:25:55,262
Oh, the best part about leaving my girl
is coming home to her.
468
00:25:55,762 --> 00:25:56,722
[door closes]
469
00:25:56,805 --> 00:25:59,675
Oh, that is such a mom thing to say.
470
00:25:59,766 --> 00:26:03,346
[laughs] Yeah. So is, "I can't wait
to get out of these spanks."
471
00:26:07,232 --> 00:26:11,152
Well, you will never guess what I did
with my notary stamp.
472
00:26:11,236 --> 00:26:15,026
I can't wait to hear
and don't leave anything out.
473
00:26:15,115 --> 00:26:17,365
Oh, it is all part of
the public record now.
474
00:26:18,451 --> 00:26:20,871
♪ Ooh, hey, hey ♪
475
00:26:20,954 --> 00:26:22,964
[Jepsen] ♪ One, two, three, four ♪
476
00:26:23,039 --> 00:26:24,829
♪ Oh ♪
477
00:26:24,916 --> 00:26:26,916
[theme music playing]
478
00:26:50,984 --> 00:26:52,994
♪ La la la la la la ♪
479
00:26:53,069 --> 00:26:54,609
♪ Ooh ♪
480
00:26:54,696 --> 00:26:56,906
♪ Oh ♪
35682
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