Original subtitles

WE ARE ALL TRYING HERE

HYOWON MANSION

Where do you live?

I'll scatter 500-won coins for you!

Where do you live?

A while back, one of my students wrote a story.

A girl had finally gotten a chance to go on a date with her long-time crush,

but she overslept and showed up late.

I lost it reading that.

I said to my student, "Hey, if it were me, I'd have gotten up at dawn to get ready."

"I wouldn't have been able to sleep."

"How could she oversleep on the day she was supposed to meet her crush?"

And you know what they said?

"When I feel loved,

I feel at ease and sleep deeply,

like I've never slept before."

I slept like a baby last night.

DONG-MAN: I SLEPT LIKE A BABY LAST NIGHT

DONG-MAN

What are you talking about?

As I said, I slept well last night.

Good for you for sleeping well.

I didn't sleep a wink.

Why?

I sent my screenplay to Eun-a,

but I haven't heard back yet.

I'm nervous.

Is it time for your features to vanish?

PRODUCER BYEON EUN-A

Hey, Eun-a's calling. I have to go.

Oh jeez.

Hello, Eun-a.

Director Lee.

It's a good read.

I'm so relieved.

I was really worried.

Eun-a, you're still at work, right?

Would you like to have dinner?

I already have plans tonight,

so I'll email you my notes.

How are you feeling these days?

These days?

I'm okay.

Doesn't it all show up in the data anyway?

Sometimes,

what the data shows doesn't match how participants say they feel.

Can you tell me how you're feeling right now?

- Excuse me? - How are you feeling right now?

I feel okay.

ANXIOUS

Ms. Byeon Eun-a.

This way, please.

I wanted to tell you something.

We've found another person who shares the same "unknown" emotion pattern as you.

Right here.

The emotional profile matches what you show when you get a nosebleed.

We've only detected it once, so we'll need to monitor it a bit more.

But in any case, there's someone else.

There's even an "unknown"?

Apparently, there are about 20 emotions

they haven't figured out what to call yet.

People who exhibit the same pattern get together to discuss

and decide what to call that emotion.

That sounds like fun.

I like coming up with names.

I hope "unknown" shows up on mine too.

When does "unknown" appear for you, Eun-a?

When I get nosebleeds.

When I feel overwhelming rage,

despair,

and helplessness beyond my control.

That's when I get nosebleeds.

Isn't that just high blood pressure?

I wonder what kind of emotion that is.

What do you want to call it?

"Self-destructive."

For some reason,

that sounds scarier than "hungry."

It shows "hungry" too?

It sure does.

But that's not even an emotion.

It doesn't seem so, right?

But it was the perfect word at the time.

That's when I was blown away.

Whoever named it "hungry" deserves a medal.

I was hurting badly, but even then, I was very impressed.

"Hungry"?

What a great name for it.

You see, I'm crazy about people who have a way with words.

My brother used to write poetry.

He'd always say there are two types of writers.

Those who've read the entire dictionary at least once and those who haven't.

My brother read it three times.

Wow.

He eventually created his own dictionary.

He was passionate about using words to find the truth.

What does he do now?

Well…

I guess

he's welding and drinking,

while still looking for the truth.

A wanted poster is better than a memorial photo.

So attack, don't self-destruct.

Attack.

Attack.

For as long as I can remember,

I've never seen people as just people.

I saw them as masses.

Masses of emotion.

Wow, I like that.

"Masses of emotion."

It's like a person isn't made of flesh and blood.

Instead, they're made from one emotion that keeps building over a lifetime.

I bet we can name everyone here

after an emotion.

- "Wary." - Right.

"Pretentious."

"Arrogant."

"Antsy."

"Resentful."

"Bored."

They really are

all masses of emotion.

There aren't many good masses of emotion.

I've always wondered

why people on the subway look so ugly.

But I guess it wasn't their faces.

It was their emotions that were ugly.

You know why kids are cute?

Because their emotions haven't formed yet.

I see.

Then what about me?

What kind of mass do I look like?

Just say the first thing that comes to mind.

Don't change it.

"Anxious."

You got me.

I'm anxious.

But isn't anxiety just part of human nature?

We exist as separate individuals,

so how can we not feel anxious?

My favorite word is

"serenity."

Calm and peaceful.

I've never felt it before,

but I have an idea of what it's like.

It's a very safe

and very warm feeling.

Like eating tangerines under a blanket in winter, while reading comic books,

but a million times better.

I'm freaking talkative, you see.

You know why?

Whenever I feel a rush of anxiety charging in all of a sudden,

I get loud and talk my head off

to chase it away.

I'm afraid of silence.

I'm afraid

the truth might pop out of nowhere in the silence.

Like boom.

What kind of truth?

When it's quiet…

I feel like a Gollum-like demon will appear…

and whisper in my ear.

You…

are worthless.

"You…

are worthless."

I don't usually watch

my own films.

Maybe "I can't" would be more accurate.

Because I think I did it all wrong.

But this time, the original novel was so good

that there was no way to get it wrong.

I thought, "I've finally made a film my daughter would be proud of."

Q&A SCREENING

Before being her mom, as an experienced actress,

I've always had that kind of thirst.

Mr. Choi invited us for drinks at Agit.

He says it's his treat.

The man is just ecstatic.

We hit a million in record time,

and now, he's already excited about hitting ten million.

You're coming, right?

I have plans at this restaurant I waited two months to get into.

I didn't think you were the type to wait like that, Mi-ran.

I'm serious when it comes to food.

Why don't we go for a drink? Mr. Choi will be waiting.

Don't say you're "serious" about something.

Just say, "I like food."

That sounds much more genuine.

Using trendy phrases and trying to be "hip," as you call it,

isn't hip at all.

Politicians and actors who lack their own style of expression

never last long.

- Let's have drinks some other time. - Yes, ma'am.

- I'll see you at home. - Take care.

- Good job. - Nice work, everyone.

Stop looking at your phone.

Are you that happy?

You can almost smell success in the numbers.

Check out the advance ticket sales.

MY MOTHER ADVANCE TICKET SALES: 65.8%

It's been so long since I've seen numbers like this.

All right.

The mom stepped in to fix what her daughter botched up.

Sorry for botching things up.

Come on, that's how it is.

You tank ten before you land one.

You know this.

I wonder when I'll finally land that one.

Just stay right by my side.

As long as you're with me, you'll land at least one.

We're doing this.

Here's to hitting ten million!

Let's go!

- Let's go! - Let's go!

What's Director Park Gyeong-se doing?

Tell him to come for a drink.

Just leave him alone. He's not in a good place these days.

DECISION TO STAY

Get some rest on your days off!

Don't just drink!

THE EIGHT CLUB

Read this, Hwang Dong-man.

We live in an era where people leave comments

like mutts leaving crap wherever they go.

We see your crap every single day.

Our group chat is filled with your crap.

You're supposed to clean up your own crap, you know.

Whenever I think of you, I feel nothing but rage all day

because of all the crap you've written and said so far.

Every day, I think about the things I didn't get to say to you that day.

"I should've said that."

"I should've said that too."

After a sleepless, rage-filled night,

I've decided to sit down and organize my thoughts clearly.

I want you to read this out loud

the same way I did.

I want you to swallow these words

the same way I did.

And I hope it hurts.

I hope it hurts

when you read this and choke it down.

No vegetables today?

One.

When the whole country raved about Ki-ri's drama,

you refused to watch it even though he's your friend.

Then you said,

"For some reason, I'm not into things everyone else likes."

"This is why I haven't made it yet."

"I'm just too niche."

This is why I haven't made it yet.

I'm just too niche.

Do you remember the vibe in the room when you said that?

Everyone went quiet.

Why do you think we stopped talking?

Because we were pissed off.

You know why you're not successful.

I know. We all know.

But seeing you try to one-up whoever's in front of you

just freaking pissed us off.

Want me to run through all the masters of niche cinema?

Or how about a list of successful niche film directors?

Being niche isn't why you haven't made it.

You just have no talent.

Your work is boring!

Damn it!

I WANT YOU TO READ THIS OUT LOUD, THE SAME WAY I DID…

He really went there, didn't he?

No way.

I bet Hwang Dong-man wants to die right now.

What is it?

No way.

They look real.

It has an amazing grip.

It's just like a real gun.

What's the movie about?

Public officials who take care of people who stress out citizens.

Sounds like a lot of politicians will get killed.

Click, clack.

Bang!

This only has two loading steps, so it doesn't sound as good.

If you're going to kill someone, you might as well use something cathartic.

Click, click, clack, thunk!

Bang!

You need at least four loading steps

to boost the action and make the audience's hearts pound.

Can't we use real guns?

We can, but it's a headache.

The firearms supplier drops them off at the police station on filming day.

The production company has to pick them up

and then return them exactly on time,

so it's better not to use them.

Come on, these look and feel just like real guns!

See? You tried to dodge it.

Amazing, right?

Two.

On the FAM tour, you had the nerve to ask a famous director for their name.

The way you pretended not to know someone

who clearly had no reason to know you was sheer arrogance.

Everyone else just stayed quiet the whole trip,

but you couldn't stop talking because you were busy hiding

the fact that you were a nobody!

You talked your head off like your life depended on it!

In the end, you proved to everyone that you were a nobody!

That's why we never go on FAM tours with you anymore.

Because there's no reason

to put up with your crap in public.

Three.

You keep getting rejected, but you do it again

- and again. - Mr. Hwang Dong-man?

Yes?

Back to three.

You keep getting rejected, but you do it again

and again.

You refuse to give up.

Now it makes me wonder,

"Maybe he's hoping he can keep doing this

until the day he dies."

Hello, it's good to see you here.

Hwang Dong-man, did you read it?

I know you can hear me!

Read it out loud!

Choke down every single word, all right?

That dumbass can't even act.

Come on, that's enough.

What's wrong?

Hwang Dong-man just walked by.

Really?

That bastard didn't even read it.

I guarantee it.

But the unread count is zero.

He just cleared the count but didn't actually read it.

What's the root of all mental illnesses?

Refusing to face reality.

It'd kill him if he read it.

He won't read it.

He can't!

He's always been like that.

Whenever anyone hits him with the truth,

he doesn't listen.

It's meant to hurt him like hell,

but the idiot just laughs and rambles about something else.

Gyeong-se,

you took a crap in the group chat too.

I know I did!

I wanted to show him he's not the only one who can take a crap.

Jun-hwan says he'll get better after wearing the emotion watch.

Tell that asshole to take some damn meds instead of wearing that stupid watch!

What just happened?

Damn it!

Are you kidding me?

- Hey, Gyeong-se! - That little…

Where are you going?

Damn it.

I can't even finish reading it.

There's something I didn't tell you.

If you scroll up,

you'll see all the crap that bastard wrote about me.

Why do you think I--

Cham, cham, cham.

Why do you think I was so harsh on Dong-man

and banned him from here?

Because I couldn't stand him?

It's because I'm embarrassed by how you lose your shit around him!

One word from him, and you shake with rage!

Aren't you ashamed to face your juniors?

What about our staff?

If you do this one more time,

I'll take down the "Hwang Dong-man not allowed" sign

and put up one that says "Park Gyeong-se not allowed."

Damn it.

I think we'll hit ten million in record time.

I can probably quit right now and live off this for the rest of my life.

But you know how it is.

I'll just use that money for a new film.

Excuse me, sir.

Something weird just came up.

I think you should see this.

Hey, I'll call you back later.

Okay.

Something weird?

What is it?

"It bothers me to see her with Jang Mi-ran…"

IT BOTHERS ME TO SEE HER WITH JANG MI-RAN, ACTING LIKE A LOVING MOTHER AND DAUGHTER

WHEN THEY AREN'T EVEN RELATED

When was this posted?

Huh?

It's me.

Did you see the social media post?

What is it?

"It bothers me to see her with Jang Mi-ran,

acting like a loving mother and daughter

when they aren't even related."

"I still remember that girl

from elementary school 23 years ago."

"Last name Byeon.'"

"She's Oh Jeong-hui's daughter,

but she was neglected and grew up

without her parents."

"Oh Jeong-hui was an unknown actor back then,

but she looked too elegant to live in our shabby neighborhood."

"That's why I remember her name."

"Compared to Oh Jeong-hui, her daughter was quiet and ordinary."

"I didn't think much of it at the time, but looking back now,

my heart simply goes out to her."

"I wonder what she's doing now

and how her life is going."

Just stop, will you?

You're not fed up with the film industry that's starving your family,

but you're fed up with me?

You miss that hellhole so much?

One day, my dad left.

Then, my mom left.

I went to school like nothing happened,

even though my heart was pounding so hard, I thought it'd pop out of my chest.

I went to school like nothing happened,

ate alone…

and slept alone.

Why didn't you tell anyone?

You could've told your teacher that you were alone.

Did you think it might put you in danger?

No.

I couldn't let anyone find out I'd been abandoned.

One word from the daughter, and it'll be over.

"It's not true. I was never neglected."

Why go overboard and issue an official statement?

People know Oh Jeong-hui got divorced at a young age.

Her husband raised their kid. She wasn't neglected.

That's her side of the story.

The truth doesn't matter right now.

What matters is making it look like the truth!

It'll only look like the truth if the daughter says it herself.

Oh Jeong-hui can talk all she wants, but no one will believe her.

How can she ask her daughter if she can't get in touch with her?

What do you mean she can't get in touch with her?

You know this is a bad sign, right?

Never mind My Mother tanking right before hitting ten million.

One wrong move and Oh Jeong-hui can kiss her career goodbye.

Okay, fine. Go ahead.

Issue an official statement for now.

But make it sound really sad.

No, heartbreaking. You know what I mean.

"I worried about her my whole life."

"We got divorced when she was little,

but I did the best I could while raising her."

Write something along those lines, and show it to her.

Ask her if it's okay to issue such a statement.

She'll know whether it's okay or not.

If you issue it without thinking,

and the daughter comes forward claiming she was neglected,

Oh Jeong-hui's career will be over.

So just ask her, damn it!

And one more thing, Mr. Park.

Find the daughter.

Find her!

We need to find her and fix this,

even if it means making amends or begging!

DM the person who posted it.

Tell them to take it down, or we'll sue for spreading false information.

Intimidate them a bit.

- Got it? - Yes, sir.

Damn it!

She left her husband and child,

who weren't good enough for her…

and replaced them with a shiny new husband and child.

There really are people who get everything they want.

When depression pressed down on me like a heavy iron weight,

and I couldn't even sit up,

all I wanted…

was weather.

If it were a warm, spring day…

If cherry blossoms were in the air…

I'd read Park Gyeong-se's message as if it were a love letter.

"Don't take this…"

Don't take this as me trying to tell you to get your act together.

At this point, I'd feel even more bitter and resentful

if I thought you'd finally gotten your life together.

I think the only way I could die in peace is to know

you're still exactly where you are right now.

So please keep living the way you always have until the very end.

"Keep living the way you always have until the very end."

Seven.

Goddamn it.

Why the hell is it so long?

He talked about dying, so this should be the end.

A SCARY WOMAN BY LEE JUN-HWAN

You know,

I believed you when you said you'd really go mainstream this time.

When I read the first draft,

I thought, "He worked really hard on this."

"A bit more effort would definitely make it mainstream."

So tell me why I'm seeing your signature B-movie vibes in the revised draft.

One thing's for sure.

You think there's an actor

who'd do this?

No, not among A-listers.

Are you going to make another film with a B-lister

and take pride in simply having made it?

You said you wouldn't do that anymore.

That's what you promised me when you signed the contract.

You might feel this way because the character stands out,

but it doesn't have B-movie vibes.

Even Eun-a said the revised draft was much better.

So if Byeon Eun-a likes it, does it mean it's good?

Why do you all keep saying, "But Byeon Eun-a liked it"?

Is she always right?

You keep singing praises about her.

Haven't you guys on the second floor heard

I've been giving her a freaking hard time?

You want to get kicked out of your office?

Eun-a reads screenplays objectively

without picturing specific actors.

You have to read them with specific actors in mind!

It makes sense now.

I was so frustrated reading this because I couldn't imagine the cast.

Ax, get in here.

Ax, my ass. She can't even hit the mark.

I said get in here!

I heard you said this was good.

Who should we cast for this?

Give me some names.

Come on.

Jang Mi-ran.

Why would she agree to this unless she wants to end her career?

Will you cast her yourself?

You need to think about the casting when you read.

If you like it, that's all?

Are we publishing this as a book?

Are we a publisher now?

How frustrating.

I'm sorry. I should've persuaded him better.

It's okay.

I agree that the revised draft is better.

If we can't trust our own instincts, who can we trust?

Hwang Dong-man has been messaging you.

You two must be getting close.

What, are you really going to see for yourself what he's like?

Aren't you embarrassed by him?

I'm more embarrassed for you, saying something like that.

I just wish

you'd give up and leave the film industry.

Don't kid yourself into thinking that you're actually talented

just because you shone briefly.

Or else you'll end up like Hwang Dong-man with 20 years down the drain.

Delivery!

That'll be 28,000 won.

Food's here.

I said the food's here.

Hey.

- How much? - It's 28,000 won.

- Enjoy your food. - Thank you.

MS. BYEON EUN-A

What made you call me at this hour?

Tell me a funny story.

Do you have

a sixth sense?

How did you know to call?

I had a really weird experience just now.

I ordered delivery and was lying down,

but I didn't fall asleep.

I could hear my brother moving around.

Then suddenly,

my brother got on top of my back

and started stomping on me.

I thought he had lost his mind.

I was sleepy and annoyed,

but too lazy to get up.

But then

I heard him grab a bottle of alcohol from across the room.

So I thought, "Then who's on my back right now?"

It's sleep paralysis.

That's when I thought I might die,

but I couldn't even move a finger.

You know how it is.

You can't move an inch, no matter how hard you try.

This bastard was dancing on my back, and I'm losing my mind.

Just then…

Delivery!

I thought, "Yes, I'm saved!"

Food's here.

"Please kick me."

I said the food's here.

"Come on, just kick me!"

"As hard as you can!"

"Yes, that's right."

"Come on."

- Hey. - "Just kick me, you bastard!"

"Please!"

- "Damn it." - It's 28,000 won.

I felt like I was dying,

but he just kept drinking.

It made me feel sad all of a sudden.

"I've got enough people to fight, and now I have to fight sleep paralysis?"

"Forget it. I'm not going to fight it."

"Go ahead and beat me, sleep paralysis."

"It's not like I'm going to die."

You know what I mean.

It feels like you're going to die, but you don't actually die.

"So go ahead, sleep paralysis. You win."

"Stomp on me or smother me. Do whatever you want."

"I'll just imagine being under a blanket, eating tangerines in winter."

And I just kept still.

The weird thing was…

once I started ignoring it,

it felt like the sleep paralysis got thrown off.

I was supposed to be in pain,

but when I said, "Go ahead, you win"

and kept still,

it was almost like it lost steam

and just slithered away.

It felt like I learned something.

Some things are worth a fight, and some aren't.

And sleep paralysis wasn't something worth a fight.

Don't fight the thing that's giving you a hard time, Eun-a.

It's like sleep paralysis.

If you just ignore it, it'll pass.

Just let it go on its way.

I feel better now after talking.

It's been hard these past few days,

but this definitely proves that talking gives me energy.

What's been giving you a hard time?

Well, I made it to the final round, so I went in for the interview, but…

Damn it, I always make it to the final round.

Anyway…

You can tell the moment you walk into an interview

whether you've got it or not.

I was thinking that I didn't get it again

and just sat there.

Then at the last minute, a judge asked why I wanted to make films.

She asked, and…

Well…

As I was answering, I got choked up. It was humiliating.

What did you say?

Why do you want to make films?

I want to…

I want to see someone…

living on the opposite side of the world…

and feel that I exist there too.

I just…

What gets to me more than losing the grant

is that I couldn't hold back my tears.

That's what kills me the most.

On top of that, I said…

All for one…

and one for all.

I mean, seriously.

Why did I say, "All for one, and one for all"?

What am I going to do? I'm so embarrassed.

My nose stopped bleeding.

Why do you have Director Kim Hyeon-tae's screenplay

when the producer in charge hasn't even seen it yet?

Don't you dare review screenplays behind my back again.

Review this.

If I get choked up while writing,

the audience will get choked up too.

If I laugh while writing,

the audience will laugh too.

If I feel pain while writing, the audience will also feel pain.

Did you get choked up writing this? Or did you laugh?

Stringing letters together isn't writing.

You have to make people feel something.

When we were little, we used to walk around like this.

Do you remember?

Do you see any adults walking around like that?

Are there any adults so happy?

Nope. There aren't any.

That's why they go to the movie theater.

To feel.

They want to get choked up, be moved to tears,

and crack up.

They want to feel alive again.

So don't just force a story together with words.

Kick the story into gear.

Bring out people's emotions!

How do you kick a story into gear?

Open a thousand doors.

And make your way through them.

And the background music should be

guitar music.

"It also means facing fear and guilt."

"Fear…"

What is it?

What do you want?

I've always struggled to deal with people who walk all over me.

Should I avoid them, or put them in their place?

I always chose to avoid them.

But this time,

I'm going to put them in their place.

I've never once thought you were powerful.

I do think you're a pain in the ass.

I hope you don't get those two confused.

Also,

I'm a quiet person,

but I'm not a weak pushover.

I hope you don't confuse this as well.

Please don't assume I'm quitting by pulling some stunt.

I don't intend to quit.

It must be entertaining,

watching someone get pushed out.

It is entertaining.

I'll admit it because I've felt that before too.

But you know,

I'd rather you be upfront about it, like Hwang Dong-man.

"It's so satisfying to see that you've lost Mr. Choi's favor."

At least that'd be amusing.

What did you just say?

- Hey, Ax-- - I'm taking off early.

Or should I stay and endure

this awkward atmosphere?

I'm confident I can endure it.

I've been tied to a desk since I was nine, so I know I can handle it.

But can the rest of you handle it?

Is something contagious going around?

Why are all these losers acting up?

Where are you?

Agit.

We should meet. Come outside.

Hey, it's Dong-man.

So?

Did you choke down every last word?

You know,

reading that out loud was so exhausting that I ended up with sleep paralysis.

Every single word got under my skin and cut so deep,

it felt like I was getting tattooed all over.

Write your screenplays like that!

You asshole.

- No, don't! - Hold on.

Every word was dripping with sincerity.

It was the best thing you've written so far.

Write your screenplays like that!

You crazy bastard!

- Hold on! - Stop!

What pisses me off the most

is you assuming that I'm so miserable.

Things aren't working out for me, so I should shut up and be miserable

and know my place, right?

Want to hear something really shocking?

Guess what?

I'm not as miserable as you all think I am.

I bet a pampered rich kid can't even begin to imagine

how people can live in a basement apartment.

I bet they think they're really miserable.

Screw that. People who live there laugh and have fun too.

They're not pretending. They really aren't miserable.

I bet you all thought

everything would be great once you debuted.

You thought it'd be a whole new world, right?

So did anything change?

No, right?

It's the same.

After 20 years, 14 screenplays, and no debut,

I'm just like the rest of you.

I'm just as miserable

and just as happy as the rest of you.

Actually, my life could be way more fun than yours.

This is all to say that you guys are no better than me,

so stop acting so superior.

Do you really believe that, or have you completely lost your mind?

Also!

You say I need to talk less, but I won't ever do that.

Joking is the only thing that makes me feel like I exist.

If I stop talking, I'm dead.

What's life? It's one long story.

When the story ends, so does life.

So don't stop me from making jokes.

It's the same thing as killing me.

Even if the world ends tomorrow,

I'll keep cracking jokes

because it's the only proof of my existence!

What do you keep looking at?

That's right.

Your brother said he'll keep making jokes and talking behind people's backs,

even if the world ends tomorrow,

because it's too hard for him to keep quiet!

We need to let people who can't shut the hell up

run their mouths until they drop dead!

Your brother says that's how we should live!

Hey, call the cops.

I'll take care of him.

No objections, right?

Oh jeez.

- Hold on. - Hang on.

Don't do this.

Please calm down!

Get off me!

Wait, don't hit me!

Are you okay?

- Please call the police. - The police?

Please hurry.

Your address is 37, Hyowon 2-gil, Dongro-gu, Seoul.

Occupation?

Occupation?

He's a film director.

Who are you?

The producer in charge.

WE ARE ALL TRYING HERE

The Eight Club?

Forget it. I'm out.

That's for you shiny people.

Doing it alone is exhausting.

I'll stay by your side and watch you.

I should be the one swearing, you bastard.

You stole from someone you shouldn't have.

You stole from a genius, you bastard.

She turned out to be closer than I thought.

She works at Choi Film.

- Hi! - Jang Mi-ran knows me?

Park Gyeong-se is a bastard Damn Gyeong-se is a bastard

Hey, let me ask you something.

Why have you been so mean to me?

Because you hated me first.

What made you hate me so much?

Subtitle translation by: Jenny Kim