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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:01,919 --> 00:00:04,505 [Sirens wailing] 2 00:00:05,756 --> 00:00:07,091 [Door opens] 3 00:00:07,592 --> 00:00:10,595 - What happened? - Betadine, saline and a suture kit. 4 00:00:10,678 --> 00:00:13,389 - What happened? - She cut herself. An accident. 5 00:00:13,472 --> 00:00:16,809 - I've got this. - How much blood has she lost? 6 00:00:16,893 --> 00:00:19,729 - Alex. - She's fine. I've got this. 7 00:00:21,105 --> 00:00:22,773 [Derek] Given the situation, 8 00:00:22,899 --> 00:00:26,277 I'd understand if you didn't want to proceed with surgery. 9 00:00:27,778 --> 00:00:29,322 But we did learn from Jeremy, 10 00:00:29,447 --> 00:00:33,034 and the formulation of the cocktail will be adjusted. 11 00:00:33,117 --> 00:00:36,287 - We have not had a positive outcome. - [Man] Liz? 12 00:00:37,246 --> 00:00:39,123 I want to take her home. 13 00:00:39,207 --> 00:00:41,876 - I understand. - No. I want the surgery. 14 00:00:41,959 --> 00:00:43,294 [Sobs] Honey. 15 00:00:44,462 --> 00:00:47,965 - Honey, that's the grief talking. - I want the surgery today. 16 00:00:49,217 --> 00:00:52,678 Well, there are no other clinical trials out there. 17 00:00:52,762 --> 00:00:55,723 No one else has any answers. 18 00:00:55,806 --> 00:00:58,392 - Dr Shepherd has worked hard on this. - Meredith. 19 00:00:58,476 --> 00:01:03,105 We're not letting you have surgery because you want to die with Jeremy. 20 00:01:03,189 --> 00:01:05,733 If I go home, I die. 21 00:01:05,816 --> 00:01:08,736 I die in a few weeks, a few days. 22 00:01:08,819 --> 00:01:11,489 I don't want to lose you. 23 00:01:14,492 --> 00:01:17,078 Mom, you won't. 24 00:01:17,161 --> 00:01:19,997 - Because I'm not finished. - [Liz sniffs] 25 00:01:22,166 --> 00:01:25,336 Daddy. He loved me. 26 00:01:25,711 --> 00:01:28,464 Yeah, you know, Jeremy really loved me. 27 00:01:29,340 --> 00:01:33,844 And he'd be so mad if... If I just gave up. 28 00:01:36,180 --> 00:01:39,934 Please. Do the surgery today. 29 00:01:45,606 --> 00:01:47,650 [Exhales] 30 00:01:47,733 --> 00:01:50,236 - [Laughter] - Lola, Andrew's asking for you. 31 00:01:50,319 --> 00:01:51,862 Could you come with me, please? 32 00:01:55,116 --> 00:01:58,369 Hey, um, is... is he 0k? 33 00:01:58,452 --> 00:02:01,330 No, he's not ok. He's stuck in a block of cement. 34 00:02:02,707 --> 00:02:05,918 Hardening-by-the-second, concrete cement. How could he be? 35 00:02:10,298 --> 00:02:12,216 Wow, you care about him. 36 00:02:15,720 --> 00:02:17,555 [Whispers] He's my friend. 37 00:02:17,638 --> 00:02:21,976 I... I know I told you he wasn't, but he's my friend. 38 00:02:23,394 --> 00:02:25,229 I think he's more than that. 39 00:02:25,313 --> 00:02:30,651 And I think you're too proud to admit it to your friends, and maybe to yourself. 40 00:02:30,735 --> 00:02:33,321 [Man] Mommy, I have a boo-boo. Kiss it better. 41 00:02:33,404 --> 00:02:38,659 - [Smacks] - Hey, he is in pain, he is scared, 42 00:02:38,743 --> 00:02:41,954 and he needs someone he knows to hold his hand. 43 00:02:42,038 --> 00:02:44,915 [Man] Lola, hold my hand. 44 00:02:46,834 --> 00:02:49,837 Screw what they think. This matters. 45 00:02:49,920 --> 00:02:51,464 They don't. 46 00:02:53,883 --> 00:02:55,676 I can't help him. 47 00:02:59,722 --> 00:03:01,974 You're gonna hate yourself for this. 48 00:03:02,266 --> 00:03:04,518 Later. 49 00:03:04,602 --> 00:03:07,938 You're gonna hate yourself for this, and you'll be right. 50 00:03:16,113 --> 00:03:19,200 - Don't think this looks right. - Cristina is dyslexic, 51 00:03:19,283 --> 00:03:22,661 but she got straight a's during school and has a Ph.D. amazing. 52 00:03:22,745 --> 00:03:26,540 - Eight letters of recommendation. - This look right? How you found 'em? 53 00:03:26,624 --> 00:03:29,377 Izzie went to college at night. Six years to graduate, 54 00:03:29,460 --> 00:03:32,380 volunteered as a candystriper. Patients wrote letters of rec. 55 00:03:32,463 --> 00:03:34,924 - [Whispers] Gotta get outta here. - [Spills] 56 00:03:37,343 --> 00:03:41,180 And Alex, he wrote this essay to get in, this moving, beautiful essay 57 00:03:41,263 --> 00:03:45,559 about how his grades weren't that good. He was suffering from testicular cancer. 58 00:03:45,643 --> 00:03:46,685 - [Thuds] - Ow! What? 59 00:03:46,769 --> 00:03:48,604 He lost a ball. I've seen him naked. 60 00:03:48,687 --> 00:03:51,732 He has two mangerines, two pouch potatoes. He lied. 61 00:03:51,816 --> 00:03:54,985 - Stop telling me information. - One point. Just one point. 62 00:03:55,069 --> 00:03:57,571 - How can they keep you back? - Forget about it! 63 00:03:57,655 --> 00:03:59,323 Photographic memory! I can't. 64 00:04:01,367 --> 00:04:04,703 - We'll get it right with Beth. - She lost the love of her life. 65 00:04:04,787 --> 00:04:07,748 - You encourage her to surgery? - Encourage her not to? 66 00:04:07,832 --> 00:04:11,085 Not me with the big ego, it's you. You backed me into a corner. 67 00:04:11,168 --> 00:04:14,088 - What was I supposed to do? I can't. - Derek. 68 00:04:14,171 --> 00:04:16,882 - She's a kid. - Who's gonna die without surgery. 69 00:04:16,966 --> 00:04:19,301 She'll die with surgery. What you and I do. 70 00:04:19,385 --> 00:04:21,887 We kill things over and over and over again. 71 00:04:21,971 --> 00:04:26,100 We've killed 12 people, and now, because of you, I will kill a 13th. 72 00:04:26,183 --> 00:04:27,768 Surgery's over, we're done. 73 00:04:27,852 --> 00:04:31,063 Don't wanna work with you, see you, talk to you. We're done. 74 00:04:38,112 --> 00:04:39,864 [Strains] 75 00:04:43,325 --> 00:04:44,702 [Grunts] 76 00:04:44,785 --> 00:04:47,496 0k, Andy, we're ready to begin. 77 00:04:48,164 --> 00:04:49,874 [Groans] Wait. Is she...? 78 00:04:49,957 --> 00:04:52,626 - Lola? - She... I couldn't find her. 79 00:04:52,710 --> 00:04:55,129 She went to eat or something. 80 00:04:55,212 --> 00:04:57,631 [Bailey] We need to start the catheter. 81 00:04:57,715 --> 00:05:01,343 0k. Now, you're gonna feel some pressure. 82 00:05:02,136 --> 00:05:05,264 She didn't go to eat. She just didn't want to come, right? 83 00:05:05,347 --> 00:05:06,724 - {gasps} - [Clanks] 84 00:05:06,807 --> 00:05:10,811 [Shudders] Lola likes to hang out with me. 85 00:05:13,814 --> 00:05:15,983 Before I did this. 86 00:05:16,066 --> 00:05:18,319 Once, she almost... 87 00:05:18,402 --> 00:05:22,031 There coulda been a kiss, 88 00:05:22,114 --> 00:05:23,991 but I chickened out. 89 00:05:24,074 --> 00:05:26,494 Well, maybe you don't need to be kissing her. 90 00:05:26,577 --> 00:05:30,164 No, I do. I do. I do need to be kissing her. 91 00:05:30,247 --> 00:05:33,417 - My whole life is about kissing her. - [Bailey] Catheter's in. 92 00:05:33,501 --> 00:05:35,753 Guys are on their last piece of cement. 93 00:05:36,712 --> 00:05:40,341 [Andrew shudders] Thank god. The hard part's over, right? 94 00:05:40,424 --> 00:05:43,761 - The hard part's over? - [Richard] Get a crash cart ready. 95 00:05:43,886 --> 00:05:49,183 I've got calcium, d-50 and Insulin. 96 00:05:49,266 --> 00:05:51,936 - Ready. - The hard part is over? 97 00:05:53,062 --> 00:05:56,190 0k, there is a chance 98 00:05:56,273 --> 00:06:00,277 that when the nice gentlemen take off the final piece of cement 99 00:06:00,361 --> 00:06:04,240 there, on your abdomen, the toxins that have been building up 100 00:06:04,323 --> 00:06:08,702 underneath the concrete will rush to your heart, and you'll crash. 101 00:06:08,786 --> 00:06:12,831 You... your heart will stop, and you'll stop breathing. 102 00:06:12,915 --> 00:06:17,419 But, no, there's no need to make that face because we will restart your heart, 103 00:06:17,503 --> 00:06:21,382 and we will put in a tube that will breathe for you and rush you to the or. 104 00:06:21,465 --> 00:06:27,012 We are good at what we do. Just, if you see the warm, welcoming light, 105 00:06:27,137 --> 00:06:29,807 - do not go into it. - [Whimpers] 106 00:06:32,726 --> 00:06:34,103 Let's go. 107 00:06:34,186 --> 00:06:36,564 [Richard] 0k, we're gonna do this on three. 108 00:06:36,647 --> 00:06:38,816 - 0k. One. - Watch the leads. 109 00:06:38,899 --> 00:06:40,818 Two. 110 00:06:43,112 --> 00:06:44,321 Three. 111 00:06:45,364 --> 00:06:47,700 [Grunting] 112 00:06:51,161 --> 00:06:53,664 - [Richard] There he goes. - [Mark] Clear his airway. 113 00:06:55,291 --> 00:06:57,376 [Richard] All right. One. 114 00:06:57,459 --> 00:07:00,296 Two. Three. 115 00:07:00,379 --> 00:07:03,966 - Easy, easy, easy. - [Callie] Push the iidocaine. 116 00:07:04,049 --> 00:07:06,719 - [Richard] Bailey. - [Bailey] Got the intubation. 117 00:07:06,802 --> 00:07:07,845 [Richard] Go. 118 00:07:10,514 --> 00:07:13,892 I don't know what you mean when you say she didn't want to die. 119 00:07:13,976 --> 00:07:18,022 When you were sitting on the floor with your mother, what did she say to you? 120 00:07:20,190 --> 00:07:23,611 She told me to be extraordinary. She said that she had failed, 121 00:07:23,694 --> 00:07:27,656 but that I should be extraordinary, that I shouldn't depend on anyone. 122 00:07:29,700 --> 00:07:32,745 "Be an extraordinary woman," is what she said. 123 00:07:32,828 --> 00:07:35,956 And so you became a surgeon, just like her. 124 00:07:36,040 --> 00:07:38,292 - Yes. - Which means you have all the tools 125 00:07:38,375 --> 00:07:40,336 - to figure this out. - But I just... 126 00:07:40,419 --> 00:07:43,172 - You need to work this through. - [Exhales] 127 00:07:43,255 --> 00:07:46,300 I promise you, when you do, you're gonna be glad. 128 00:07:46,383 --> 00:07:49,553 [J' Jon foreman: The cure for pain] 129 00:08:00,105 --> 00:08:02,566 - My head is exploding. - Make it uneprode. 130 00:08:03,067 --> 00:08:06,153 - Are... are you mad at me? - No. 131 00:08:06,236 --> 00:08:08,947 - Why talk to me in that voice? - There's no voice. 132 00:08:09,031 --> 00:08:11,575 There's a voice. And I did you a favour. 133 00:08:11,659 --> 00:08:15,162 You didn't do me a favour. You made it clear that I'm still me. 134 00:08:15,245 --> 00:08:17,039 The almost guy. 135 00:08:17,122 --> 00:08:20,668 All that separates me from the rest of my class is one point? 136 00:08:20,751 --> 00:08:24,338 It would've been ok if it was 50 points or even ten points, but one? 137 00:08:24,421 --> 00:08:28,759 That means it was right there, it was in my hand, and I let it slip away. 138 00:08:28,842 --> 00:08:31,178 I didn't want to know that. Do you get that? 139 00:08:31,261 --> 00:08:34,682 That knowing that if I had just checked a instead of b, 140 00:08:34,765 --> 00:08:38,686 one point separates me from freedom. I have been running my tail off, 141 00:08:38,769 --> 00:08:42,398 busting my ass to make up for one lousy point, 142 00:08:42,481 --> 00:08:44,608 proving... 143 00:08:47,277 --> 00:08:50,072 You didn't do me a favour. Don't kid yourself. 144 00:08:54,118 --> 00:08:57,371 At least now you know you have what it takes. [Chuckles] 145 00:08:57,454 --> 00:08:58,956 Yeah. 146 00:09:02,042 --> 00:09:06,046 This arm's almost bandaged, then we're gonna move to the other one, ok? 147 00:09:07,923 --> 00:09:10,592 I've prescribed her alprazolam and clonazepam. 148 00:09:10,676 --> 00:09:14,263 Psych will be down, but it'd be good to keep her calm. 149 00:09:14,346 --> 00:09:17,891 She doesn't need any drugs or any psych. 150 00:09:19,059 --> 00:09:21,562 She needs a psych consult to be admitted. 151 00:09:21,645 --> 00:09:23,230 - Not admitting her. - Not taking her. 152 00:09:23,313 --> 00:09:27,067 - I was watching her every minute. - You shouldn't have to watch her. 153 00:09:27,151 --> 00:09:29,695 You're not on today so she was admitted under my name, 154 00:09:29,778 --> 00:09:32,865 which means I decide the treatment. She needs to be put on hold... 155 00:09:32,948 --> 00:09:35,534 Damn it! Leave us alone, you stupid bitch. 156 00:09:49,757 --> 00:09:51,091 [Sn iffs] 157 00:09:51,175 --> 00:09:54,595 You're supposed to sit down. That's what the breaks are for. 158 00:09:54,678 --> 00:09:58,432 - We're on our feet. Rest your legs. - My legs are good. 159 00:09:58,515 --> 00:10:02,436 Inappropriate, don't you think, thinking about sex during surgery? 160 00:10:02,519 --> 00:10:05,105 Just saying what I've been witnessing a" day. 161 00:10:05,189 --> 00:10:08,275 This poor kid's entire body was encased in cement. 162 00:10:08,358 --> 00:10:11,987 His legs are crushed, his vessels and nerves cut off completely, 163 00:10:12,070 --> 00:10:15,783 and still... I was turned on. 164 00:10:15,866 --> 00:10:19,828 This entire time I've been turned on because of you and your dirty talk. 165 00:10:19,912 --> 00:10:24,041 It wasn't my dirty talk. It's what I was dirty talking about. 166 00:10:24,166 --> 00:10:27,419 - [Laughs] What? - Erica. You and Erica. 167 00:10:27,961 --> 00:10:30,255 [Scoffs] No. That's... 168 00:10:30,339 --> 00:10:31,423 - No. - Callie. 169 00:10:31,548 --> 00:10:33,300 - What? - It's ok. 170 00:10:33,383 --> 00:10:36,053 I wish I was all someone thought about. 171 00:10:43,060 --> 00:10:45,395 You had 14 letters of recommendation. 172 00:10:49,983 --> 00:10:54,321 Cristina had eight, Meredith had four, Izzie had ten. But you had 14. 173 00:10:54,404 --> 00:10:58,700 The words used to describe you... Nobody had recommendations like yours. 174 00:10:58,784 --> 00:11:02,621 People said the others were smart, they said they were hard workers, 175 00:11:02,704 --> 00:11:05,999 they said that they were good. But your letters? 176 00:11:06,083 --> 00:11:07,918 They said you were great. 177 00:11:08,001 --> 00:11:10,546 They spoke of kindness, attention to detail. 178 00:11:10,629 --> 00:11:14,466 They talked about how hard you try, and that you never give up. 179 00:11:14,550 --> 00:11:18,428 They painted a picture of the kind of doctor that I hope to become. 180 00:11:18,595 --> 00:11:22,224 It was an honour to read those letters, because now I know that what 181 00:11:22,307 --> 00:11:25,519 separates you from the others isn't one stupid point. 182 00:11:25,602 --> 00:11:28,814 What separates you from the others is greatness. 183 00:11:30,440 --> 00:11:33,569 So don't you dare let one point hold you back. 184 00:11:41,451 --> 00:11:44,454 [Whirring] 185 00:11:45,747 --> 00:11:47,791 I'm covered in blood. Talk fast. 186 00:11:47,875 --> 00:11:52,045 Alex brought Rebecca in. She tried to hurt herself. He's taking Rebecca home. 187 00:11:52,129 --> 00:11:54,423 - And? - She needs to be admitted. 188 00:11:54,506 --> 00:11:56,550 - She needs a psych consult. - And? 189 00:11:56,633 --> 00:11:59,595 - Can you just do your job? - I am doing my job. 190 00:11:59,678 --> 00:12:04,099 I'm helping a 19-year-old man that I promised would get to live, get to live. 191 00:12:04,182 --> 00:12:08,186 That's my job as a surgeon. I took my son to day-care when I came in. 192 00:12:08,270 --> 00:12:10,564 My job as a mother. I'm asking you, 193 00:12:10,647 --> 00:12:14,443 what are you going to do about your patient? My job as chief resident. 194 00:12:14,526 --> 00:12:17,654 - How about you do your job? - I can't. 195 00:12:17,738 --> 00:12:21,283 - I don't know what to do. - Stevens. She's your patient. 196 00:12:21,366 --> 00:12:25,913 He's... her loved one. Come on, you know what to do. 197 00:12:25,996 --> 00:12:27,497 It's just hard to do it. 198 00:12:30,000 --> 00:12:32,836 - Ok, I'll try. - No, you don't have to try. 199 00:12:32,920 --> 00:12:36,548 You're a doctor trained by me, with all the skills that god gave you. 200 00:12:36,632 --> 00:12:38,467 You have everything you need. 201 00:12:43,347 --> 00:12:44,890 Each one teach one. 202 00:12:44,973 --> 00:12:46,600 [Door opens] 203 00:12:46,683 --> 00:12:49,353 - Where are we? - Sloan, hahn and torres are done. 204 00:12:49,436 --> 00:12:51,521 - We're up. - [Cristina] Unclamped the vein. 205 00:12:51,647 --> 00:12:54,024 - Blood row is good to the liver. - [Door closes] 206 00:12:54,107 --> 00:12:57,736 - Right, chief? - Absqutely right. Good job. 207 00:12:57,819 --> 00:13:00,822 - [Bailey] Good, then we're ready to... - [Monitor beeping] 208 00:13:02,532 --> 00:13:05,702 [J' Adele: Hometown glory] 209 00:13:11,208 --> 00:13:12,960 [Exhales] 210 00:13:13,043 --> 00:13:16,505 I think I liked it better when you were saying boring science stuff. 211 00:13:16,588 --> 00:13:18,674 [Laughs softly] 212 00:13:21,885 --> 00:13:23,971 I'm never good enough. 213 00:13:25,305 --> 00:13:27,849 No matter what I say or what I do. 214 00:13:29,935 --> 00:13:31,895 I never wanted to do this. 215 00:13:33,397 --> 00:13:36,316 This clinical trial is making me a failure. 216 00:13:39,319 --> 00:13:45,200 I fail her over and over and over. 217 00:13:48,328 --> 00:13:49,913 You mean "them". 218 00:13:52,207 --> 00:13:56,086 When you say, "fail her", you mean, "fail them". 219 00:13:57,170 --> 00:13:58,714 The patients. 220 00:14:13,812 --> 00:14:16,857 He's gonna need an embolectomy. Call hahn back here. 221 00:14:16,940 --> 00:14:20,610 - A clot in the right pulmonary artery. - I could get to it. 222 00:14:20,694 --> 00:14:22,738 - Hahn will assess him. - I can get to it. 223 00:14:22,821 --> 00:14:26,074 The lung retracts, leaving the area for embolectomy clear. 224 00:14:26,158 --> 00:14:29,286 He's already severely compromised. We'd waste time, 225 00:14:29,411 --> 00:14:32,873 time his brain won't be perfusing. It'll take me seconds. 226 00:14:32,956 --> 00:14:35,542 I've done it before. With Burke. 227 00:14:37,335 --> 00:14:39,129 I promised this kid he'd live. 228 00:14:41,506 --> 00:14:43,800 Dr Bailey, take over cpr. 229 00:14:43,884 --> 00:14:46,511 Yang, I'm right here if you need me. 230 00:14:59,066 --> 00:15:00,817 [Door opens] 231 00:15:04,905 --> 00:15:06,323 [Exhales] 232 00:15:09,117 --> 00:15:11,578 You don't have to do this. 233 00:15:11,661 --> 00:15:15,165 - Come on. What are you, scared? - Yes. 234 00:15:18,126 --> 00:15:19,503 Me, too. 235 00:15:20,545 --> 00:15:24,633 So let's just leap. Ok? 236 00:15:33,308 --> 00:15:34,684 [Inhales] 237 00:15:34,768 --> 00:15:36,520 [Exhales] 238 00:15:38,021 --> 00:15:39,523 [Door opens] 239 00:15:41,900 --> 00:15:43,944 - What happened? - He threw a pe. 240 00:15:44,027 --> 00:15:46,363 Yang would be the best person to open him up? 241 00:15:46,446 --> 00:15:49,533 - She's a cardiac savant. - Is that why she went through 242 00:15:49,616 --> 00:15:53,078 - the fourth intercostal space? - Couldn't get in through fifth. 243 00:15:53,161 --> 00:15:56,581 - Gauze pushing the diaphragm up. - This could be easier 244 00:15:56,665 --> 00:16:00,001 - under quoro. - Already had the tee. I'm doing fine. 245 00:16:00,085 --> 00:16:02,629 Reach it better... Forget it. I'll do it. 246 00:16:02,712 --> 00:16:04,464 - Gown, please. - I've got this. 247 00:16:04,548 --> 00:16:07,843 - No, if you had done it... - Just shut up and let me work. 248 00:16:10,220 --> 00:16:12,180 Let her work, dr hahn. 249 00:16:24,860 --> 00:16:28,655 Shepherd scheduled two craniotomies for the clinical trial today? 250 00:16:28,738 --> 00:16:32,409 - Yes, we lost the first one... - I told Meredith one patient. 251 00:16:32,492 --> 00:16:35,954 - Dr grey said she cleared it with you. - Did she? 252 00:16:37,414 --> 00:16:43,253 - I... sir, I might be mistaken. - I don't think you are. 253 00:16:47,465 --> 00:16:52,387 - She's holding steady. - The icp's 13. 254 00:16:52,470 --> 00:16:54,890 - We'll see. - Derek. 255 00:16:55,599 --> 00:16:59,895 She's still alive. We've gotten this far. 256 00:16:59,978 --> 00:17:03,607 - She's still alive. - For how long? 257 00:17:04,107 --> 00:17:06,693 - You can go. - I'll stay with her. 258 00:17:06,776 --> 00:17:10,906 No, it's just... I'll do it. You can go. 259 00:17:27,464 --> 00:17:29,799 [Sighs] 260 00:17:29,883 --> 00:17:32,469 Yang erw solo, 261 00:17:32,552 --> 00:17:36,640 and you should be celebrating because that means you're doing your job. 262 00:17:36,723 --> 00:17:39,100 Teaching her how to save a life. 263 00:17:40,685 --> 00:17:43,855 Residents are like puppies, 264 00:17:43,939 --> 00:17:47,192 eager and enthusiastic, and you need to learn how to teach 265 00:17:47,275 --> 00:17:49,152 without crushing their spirit. 266 00:17:49,778 --> 00:17:53,406 Now you want to work here with my residents, 267 00:17:53,490 --> 00:17:57,786 then you need to do better. You need to be a better teacher. 268 00:18:04,125 --> 00:18:05,502 [Exhales] 269 00:18:13,551 --> 00:18:18,890 - Don't make me regret backing you up. - No, sir. Absolutely not, sir. 270 00:18:18,974 --> 00:18:22,519 - Thank you, sir. - Puppies. 271 00:18:29,526 --> 00:18:30,944 [Izzie] Rebecca. 272 00:18:31,403 --> 00:18:34,781 This is dr shapiro from psych. He's gonna be examining you. 273 00:18:34,864 --> 00:18:37,993 - [Alex] Iz... - Ask questions while Karev and I talk. 274 00:18:50,297 --> 00:18:53,133 - What did I tell you? - She's my patient. 275 00:18:53,216 --> 00:18:56,803 I decide her treatment. I am not releasing her without a consult. 276 00:18:56,886 --> 00:19:00,473 If you try to take her without my ok, I will have you arrested. 277 00:19:00,557 --> 00:19:02,726 - You can't have me arrested. - Try me. 278 00:19:02,809 --> 00:19:06,479 Look, iz, you're worried. I see that, and I understand. 279 00:19:06,563 --> 00:19:08,857 But you're being a little unreasonable. 280 00:19:08,940 --> 00:19:12,652 - I've got this. - No, you don't have it. I have it. 281 00:19:12,736 --> 00:19:14,904 - I'm taking her home. - No. No! 282 00:19:15,905 --> 00:19:18,783 - You gonna bodin restrain me? - I will if I have to. 283 00:19:18,867 --> 00:19:20,452 - Hit a woman? - If I have to. 284 00:19:20,535 --> 00:19:24,831 Alex, she's sick. She needs help you cannot possibly give her. 285 00:19:24,914 --> 00:19:27,042 - I can take care of her. - No, you can't. 286 00:19:27,125 --> 00:19:30,420 You have no idea. You could do damage by taking her home. 287 00:19:30,503 --> 00:19:33,006 I can take care of her. I've done this before. 288 00:19:33,089 --> 00:19:35,800 - Alex... - She's just going through a bad patch. 289 00:19:35,884 --> 00:19:38,345 People go through a bad patch. All right? 290 00:19:38,428 --> 00:19:40,805 I can feed her and I can... I can change her, 291 00:19:40,889 --> 00:19:44,476 and I can bathe her and I can watch her. Until the bad patch is over, 292 00:19:44,559 --> 00:19:49,356 I can take care of her. I took care of my mom, and I can take care of her. 293 00:19:50,815 --> 00:19:53,860 - You've done this before. - I've done this before. 294 00:19:53,943 --> 00:19:56,321 I have done this before, Izzie. 295 00:19:56,404 --> 00:20:00,533 But I was a kid then, and I'm a man now, so I'll be better at it. 296 00:20:00,617 --> 00:20:02,786 - I have done this before. - Stop. 297 00:20:04,537 --> 00:20:06,790 You don't have to say anymore. 298 00:20:26,309 --> 00:20:27,644 [Squirts] 299 00:20:57,382 --> 00:20:59,926 - You're here early. - I never went home. 300 00:21:00,009 --> 00:21:03,680 You'd want to monitor your patient. I figured you were tired. 301 00:21:03,763 --> 00:21:06,975 - How is he? - His vitals are stable. 302 00:21:07,058 --> 00:21:09,769 He received 16 litters over the first 24 hours. 303 00:21:09,853 --> 00:21:15,358 I changed it down to 125 cc's per hour. Urine output's at 37 cc's per hour. 304 00:21:15,442 --> 00:21:18,736 He had some anxiety at 3am, and then again at 5am, 305 00:21:18,820 --> 00:21:22,991 - which I treated with diphenhydramine. - Good. Good job. 306 00:21:23,199 --> 00:21:25,243 It's not a good job. 307 00:21:27,454 --> 00:21:32,041 - O'Malley? - It's not a good job for me. 308 00:21:33,293 --> 00:21:36,838 Sitting by his bedside recording urine output 309 00:21:36,921 --> 00:21:41,885 and giving anti-anxiety meds all night. It's not a good job for me. 310 00:21:41,968 --> 00:21:45,555 Running labs for Meredith Grey, that's not a good job for me. 311 00:21:45,638 --> 00:21:48,308 It's not a good job because I'm better than that, 312 00:21:48,391 --> 00:21:52,687 and you know I'm better than that. Maybe if I wasn't good at my job 313 00:21:52,770 --> 00:21:57,233 or maybe if I had struggled and was lagging behind... 314 00:21:58,902 --> 00:22:02,947 My personality, I'm not Karev, I'm not Yang, I'm not Meredith. 315 00:22:03,031 --> 00:22:06,951 I'm not hardened, I get that. I get it. 316 00:22:07,035 --> 00:22:10,121 I don't have the personality of a surgeon. 317 00:22:10,205 --> 00:22:12,916 Maybe that's why you made the mistake 318 00:22:13,041 --> 00:22:16,294 of not thinking that I deserve a second chance 319 00:22:16,377 --> 00:22:19,005 when everyone else around here has gotten one. 320 00:22:19,088 --> 00:22:22,592 But, sir, it is a mistake because I'm excellent. 321 00:22:22,675 --> 00:22:26,012 I'm excellent at my job. And I did fail my test, 322 00:22:26,095 --> 00:22:29,224 but I deserve a second chance. 323 00:22:39,108 --> 00:22:43,279 - Ok? - Ok, you can retake the test. 324 00:22:52,664 --> 00:22:55,375 She hasn't woken up yet. 325 00:22:55,458 --> 00:22:59,462 Sometimes it takes longer with brain surgery for the body to recover. 326 00:23:00,129 --> 00:23:03,216 But she could not wake up? 327 00:23:03,299 --> 00:23:06,553 - Could she die? - That's a possibility, 328 00:23:06,636 --> 00:23:09,556 but I'd rather not worry about that until we have to. 329 00:23:09,639 --> 00:23:12,100 - When? - When what? 330 00:23:13,685 --> 00:23:17,063 When will we have to start worrying about that? 331 00:23:29,242 --> 00:23:33,413 - Still here. Sleep in the waiting room? - Look, I like him. 332 00:23:33,496 --> 00:23:36,207 All right, I do. But he doesn't need to know that. 333 00:23:36,291 --> 00:23:38,710 - Nobody needs to know that. - He needs you, 334 00:23:38,793 --> 00:23:41,963 - and you're worried about your friends? - What do you know? 335 00:23:42,046 --> 00:23:47,010 Do you know what it'd be like for me, for him, if they knew? Think it's easy? 336 00:23:49,304 --> 00:23:51,097 I think it's better to be honest. 337 00:23:54,642 --> 00:23:59,856 He's alive. Barely, but... he's alive. 338 00:24:07,905 --> 00:24:10,908 I, uh, called your husband. 339 00:24:10,992 --> 00:24:14,495 He says he took the baby and left you two months ago. 340 00:24:16,289 --> 00:24:19,417 He says... 341 00:24:28,509 --> 00:24:32,639 You have something called underlying borderline personality disorder, 342 00:24:32,722 --> 00:24:36,976 which means you were fragile to start with, so this... 343 00:24:37,060 --> 00:24:39,771 This has probably been coming on for a while. 344 00:24:40,396 --> 00:24:43,983 Probably since your... your accident. 345 00:24:44,067 --> 00:24:45,902 Then they changed your face. 346 00:24:47,987 --> 00:24:49,864 I helped change your face. 347 00:24:51,240 --> 00:24:53,076 You couldn't... 348 00:24:57,121 --> 00:25:00,333 You need help, Rebecca, and I can't give it to you. 349 00:25:05,380 --> 00:25:08,883 So you're gonna stay here tonight, and tomorrow... 350 00:25:11,552 --> 00:25:15,264 Tomorrow, they're gonna transfer you to a psychiatric facility. 351 00:25:17,392 --> 00:25:19,268 - I think that's better. - [Sobs] 352 00:25:21,604 --> 00:25:23,272 [Whispers] I'm sorry. 353 00:25:28,277 --> 00:25:30,238 I really tried. 354 00:25:32,156 --> 00:25:34,617 I wanted to be better for you. 355 00:25:37,620 --> 00:25:40,456 I know how hard it is for you to trust people, 356 00:25:40,540 --> 00:25:43,584 and I wanted to be someone you could depend on. 357 00:25:43,668 --> 00:25:45,253 [Sobs] 358 00:25:45,336 --> 00:25:47,130 [Whispers] I'm sorry. 359 00:25:49,507 --> 00:25:50,967 I'm sorry. 360 00:26:02,562 --> 00:26:06,566 So you convinced Shepherd to do the second surgery without my approval. 361 00:26:10,945 --> 00:26:13,489 That's how you speak to the chief, "so?" 362 00:26:15,825 --> 00:26:20,204 My mother tried to kill herself after you left. Did you know that? 363 00:26:22,206 --> 00:26:27,044 - Did you know that? - I didn't know that. 364 00:26:27,128 --> 00:26:30,965 - I'm sorry. I didn't know. - She was a brilliant surgeon. 365 00:26:32,175 --> 00:26:34,343 How could you do that to her? 366 00:26:35,178 --> 00:26:39,891 She was a talented, gifted, extraordinary surgeon. 367 00:26:55,198 --> 00:26:57,408 - Tell me. - She was a surgeon. 368 00:26:57,492 --> 00:27:01,037 An excellent surgeon. If she was really trying to kill herself, 369 00:27:01,120 --> 00:27:03,998 she wouldn't have slit her wrists. She knew better. 370 00:27:04,081 --> 00:27:07,126 She would've taken the scalpel, cut her carotid artery. 371 00:27:07,210 --> 00:27:10,588 Would've taken seconds to die. She didn't really want to die. 372 00:27:10,671 --> 00:27:13,633 She was an excellent, gifted, extraordinary surgeon. 373 00:27:13,716 --> 00:27:16,219 - Didn't want to die. - What did she want? 374 00:27:16,302 --> 00:27:19,806 - She wanted Richard to come back. - And why didn't he come back? 375 00:27:19,889 --> 00:27:24,227 Well, because he never knew about it, and she was too stubborn to ask. 376 00:27:25,228 --> 00:27:28,147 - What does that mean? - Well, that part I don't know. 377 00:27:28,231 --> 00:27:30,483 Could you just tell me that part for once? 378 00:27:31,067 --> 00:27:32,652 I can. 379 00:27:32,735 --> 00:27:35,655 It means that you are a gifted, 380 00:27:35,738 --> 00:27:39,200 talented, extraordinary surgeon, exactly like your mother, 381 00:27:39,283 --> 00:27:43,621 but the difference is you get to learn from her mistakes. 382 00:27:47,208 --> 00:27:49,961 Be extraordinary. 383 00:27:52,213 --> 00:27:56,592 - She wasn't talking about surgery. - No, she wasn't. 384 00:27:59,595 --> 00:28:01,931 She wasn't talking about surgery at all. 385 00:28:14,110 --> 00:28:17,196 Well, do I or do I not keep my promises? 386 00:28:18,698 --> 00:28:22,535 - [Groans] You do. - [Chuckles] 387 00:28:22,618 --> 00:28:26,163 And remember what I said about the bigger picture? 388 00:28:27,582 --> 00:28:29,292 Yeah. 389 00:28:57,403 --> 00:28:58,738 [Laughs] 390 00:28:58,821 --> 00:29:01,490 He's been waiting his whole life for that, huh? 391 00:29:01,574 --> 00:29:03,159 Yes, he has. 392 00:29:12,668 --> 00:29:14,420 - Are those Beth's films? - Yes. 393 00:29:14,503 --> 00:29:17,465 These are from two days ago, and these are from today. 394 00:29:17,548 --> 00:29:20,509 Would you hand me the callipers, please? 395 00:29:27,642 --> 00:29:30,811 This one is smaller than that one. The tumour's shrinking. 396 00:29:30,895 --> 00:29:33,606 - The virus is working. - Oh, my god. [Laughs] 397 00:29:34,231 --> 00:29:39,612 - You have to go tell Derek. - No. You have to tell Derek. 398 00:29:39,695 --> 00:29:42,365 It's the kind of news he'd want to hear from you. 399 00:29:44,575 --> 00:29:46,661 Rose. 400 00:29:46,744 --> 00:29:50,373 Congratulations on your major medical breakthrough. 401 00:29:50,456 --> 00:29:52,875 It's the stuff of legends. 402 00:29:59,298 --> 00:30:02,885 - Hey! - Take the sparkle pager back. 403 00:30:02,969 --> 00:30:04,470 I am drunk on the power. 404 00:30:04,553 --> 00:30:07,390 - Where is it? - I think it might actually be mystical. 405 00:30:07,473 --> 00:30:09,100 - Have you seen Derek? - Nope. 406 00:30:12,895 --> 00:30:17,650 - Um... you paged, dr Yang? - Grab that banana from my cubby. 407 00:30:21,570 --> 00:30:24,490 You... you want me to peel it for you? 408 00:30:24,573 --> 00:30:27,493 I want you to learn running whip stitch. I'll teach it. 409 00:30:27,576 --> 00:30:29,203 Take the needle. 410 00:30:30,871 --> 00:30:32,164 - Chart. - Here you go. 411 00:30:32,248 --> 00:30:33,582 Thank you. 412 00:30:34,333 --> 00:30:36,419 [Muffled sobbing] 413 00:31:00,109 --> 00:31:01,610 Hey. 414 00:31:03,279 --> 00:31:04,655 You're alive. 415 00:31:08,117 --> 00:31:10,494 Yeah. I'm alive. 416 00:31:22,965 --> 00:31:25,426 Not just for show anymore. 417 00:31:28,054 --> 00:31:29,638 - No. - [Beth breathing heavily] 418 00:31:42,193 --> 00:31:43,652 [Rustling] 419 00:31:45,613 --> 00:31:47,865 That's not sanitary. 420 00:31:49,784 --> 00:31:51,869 A little closer together. Try again. 421 00:31:53,079 --> 00:31:55,081 - Dr Yang, thank you for... - Uh-huh. 422 00:32:03,005 --> 00:32:04,548 How'd it go? 423 00:32:06,717 --> 00:32:09,970 - Awful. [Clears throat] - Yeah. 424 00:32:18,896 --> 00:32:20,940 These are for you. 425 00:32:21,982 --> 00:32:23,943 Why give me your keys to the clinic? 426 00:32:24,026 --> 00:32:27,613 I'm not giving you my keys to the clinic. I'm giving you the clinic. 427 00:32:29,949 --> 00:32:33,911 I've seen the bigger picture. I love the clinic. 428 00:32:33,994 --> 00:32:36,580 I love what it means, I love what it is. 429 00:32:36,664 --> 00:32:39,208 But I don't love it as much as I love surgery. 430 00:32:39,291 --> 00:32:43,337 I don't love it as much as I love being chief resident. 431 00:32:43,420 --> 00:32:47,591 I don't love it as much as I love my husband and my child. 432 00:32:48,717 --> 00:32:50,511 I have seen the bigger picture, 433 00:32:50,594 --> 00:32:55,558 and I can't do everything and still have everything. 434 00:32:55,641 --> 00:33:00,855 So I have to... let some pieces go. 435 00:33:01,730 --> 00:33:06,735 This piece. This is your piece. 436 00:33:06,819 --> 00:33:10,322 I've watched you earn this piece 437 00:33:10,406 --> 00:33:13,701 the hard way, the awful way. 438 00:33:13,784 --> 00:33:19,665 Knowing that I can give the clinic to someone like you. 439 00:33:19,748 --> 00:33:25,754 You have grown into a fine doctor, Izzie Stevens. 440 00:33:30,342 --> 00:33:31,468 Thank you. 441 00:33:39,935 --> 00:33:43,731 The Denny duquette memorial clinic is in your hands. 442 00:33:43,814 --> 00:33:45,691 You make me proud. 443 00:33:45,774 --> 00:33:48,903 [J' Bryn Christopher: The quest] 444 00:33:54,992 --> 00:33:56,994 Derek! 445 00:33:57,077 --> 00:33:58,579 He's not there. 446 00:34:08,964 --> 00:34:10,591 I'm not a bad man. 447 00:34:11,800 --> 00:34:16,347 I know I'm the villain in your story, but I'm not a bad man. 448 00:34:23,229 --> 00:34:24,688 [Closes trunk] 449 00:34:24,772 --> 00:34:27,566 So you want to finish what we started yesterday? 450 00:34:27,650 --> 00:34:29,818 Or you can finish what you started. 451 00:34:38,744 --> 00:34:39,870 I'm growing. 452 00:34:41,455 --> 00:34:42,831 Go. Get outta here. 453 00:34:54,843 --> 00:34:56,095 Hey. [Exhales] 454 00:34:56,178 --> 00:34:58,597 I wanted to see if you wanted to grab a drink. 455 00:34:58,681 --> 00:35:01,976 - I can't find my keys. - Maybe we could, um... 456 00:35:03,894 --> 00:35:06,939 - Something I wanted to talk about. - I had the damn keys. 457 00:35:07,022 --> 00:35:09,566 I put them in this bag, but I can't remember... 458 00:35:09,650 --> 00:35:12,945 - This whole thing with Yang... - Erica. 459 00:35:13,028 --> 00:35:17,032 - What? - I'm saying something here. 460 00:35:22,079 --> 00:35:24,206 I just... I wanted to say... 461 00:35:28,252 --> 00:35:29,545 I just wanted to say... 462 00:35:45,394 --> 00:35:48,772 - Richard? - I want to come home. 463 00:35:48,856 --> 00:35:51,442 - Richard! - I am a good man. 464 00:35:51,525 --> 00:35:53,193 I'm a good man. 465 00:35:53,277 --> 00:35:56,989 I spend my days being a good man for the hospital, for my residents, 466 00:35:57,072 --> 00:35:58,615 for my patients. 467 00:35:58,991 --> 00:36:02,703 I'm a good man who made one mistake with a woman 20 years ago. 468 00:36:02,786 --> 00:36:06,707 I am a good man for everybody but you. I know that. 469 00:36:06,790 --> 00:36:10,961 Don't you think I know that? But I am a good man. 470 00:36:11,045 --> 00:36:13,339 And I am your husband... 471 00:36:14,381 --> 00:36:15,924 And I love you. 472 00:36:17,593 --> 00:36:21,930 Now, I am not asking you to come home. 473 00:36:22,014 --> 00:36:24,266 I'm telling you. 474 00:36:24,391 --> 00:36:28,896 I am your husband, and I want to come home to my wife. 475 00:36:30,397 --> 00:36:31,440 [Exhales] 476 00:36:33,150 --> 00:36:34,443 [Exhales] 477 00:36:41,241 --> 00:36:42,951 It's about time. 478 00:36:58,342 --> 00:37:01,553 - I'm retaking my intern test. - Oh, my god. 479 00:37:01,637 --> 00:37:04,681 I talked to the chief, made my case, I'm taking the test. 480 00:37:04,765 --> 00:37:08,477 Lexie, I know I was mad before, but thank you, thank you, thank you. 481 00:37:09,144 --> 00:37:12,481 Thank you. Get out the liquor, 'cause we are celebrating. 482 00:37:26,703 --> 00:37:28,997 - I'm sorry. - Whatever. 483 00:37:38,424 --> 00:37:40,551 Not whatever. 484 00:37:40,634 --> 00:37:42,177 I'm sorry. 485 00:37:43,178 --> 00:37:45,722 About Rebecca and your mom. 486 00:37:47,850 --> 00:37:49,685 I'm sorry. 487 00:37:57,151 --> 00:37:59,653 - Alex. - [Whispers] Please. 488 00:38:00,279 --> 00:38:02,364 Just this once. 489 00:38:04,074 --> 00:38:06,702 Just for this one night, please. 490 00:38:06,785 --> 00:38:08,287 Please. 491 00:38:36,190 --> 00:38:38,233 [Sobs] 492 00:38:39,234 --> 00:38:42,613 [Sobbing] Please. Please. 493 00:38:55,167 --> 00:38:56,418 [Clicks] 494 00:38:57,336 --> 00:38:58,837 [Exhales] 495 00:39:00,255 --> 00:39:01,798 We goin' home. 496 00:39:04,176 --> 00:39:06,637 [Grunts] Home to daddy. 497 00:39:10,224 --> 00:39:12,726 [Birds hooting] 498 00:39:23,779 --> 00:39:26,448 [J' ida Maria: Keep me warm] 499 00:39:28,784 --> 00:39:32,829 [Meredith] Stupid, corny, idiotic. I cannot believe I did this. 500 00:39:32,913 --> 00:39:36,917 Stupid loser. Son of a... I could be at home instead of... 501 00:39:37,000 --> 00:39:38,043 [Scoffs] 502 00:39:38,126 --> 00:39:40,128 - Stupid brain man. - Meredith. 503 00:39:40,212 --> 00:39:42,005 Where have you been? 504 00:39:42,089 --> 00:39:46,260 I've been waiting and waiting for you, and I did this stupid, embarrassing, 505 00:39:46,343 --> 00:39:49,930 humiliating, corny thing, and I was gonna tell you that this here 506 00:39:50,013 --> 00:39:54,268 is our kitchen and this is our living room, 507 00:39:54,351 --> 00:39:57,229 and that's the room where our kids could play. 508 00:39:57,312 --> 00:39:59,731 I had this thing, "I was gonna build us a house," 509 00:39:59,815 --> 00:40:02,025 but I don't build houses. I'm a surgeon. 510 00:40:02,109 --> 00:40:06,029 And now I'm here feeling like a lame-ass loser. 511 00:40:06,113 --> 00:40:10,576 I got a" whole and healed, and you don't show up. 512 00:40:10,659 --> 00:40:12,995 It's ruined because you took so long. 513 00:40:13,078 --> 00:40:15,956 And I couldn't even find that bottle of champagne. 514 00:40:24,339 --> 00:40:25,841 This is the kitchen? 515 00:40:26,842 --> 00:40:28,885 Living room? 516 00:40:30,304 --> 00:40:32,097 Little small. 517 00:40:32,180 --> 00:40:34,933 I think the view is much better from here. 518 00:40:35,017 --> 00:40:37,811 And that's the room where the kids are gonna play? [Laughs] 519 00:40:42,983 --> 00:40:44,526 Where's our bedroom? 520 00:40:45,944 --> 00:40:49,239 I'm still mad at you, and I don't know if I trust you. 521 00:40:49,323 --> 00:40:52,159 I want to, but I don't know if I do. I'm just gonna try. 522 00:40:52,242 --> 00:40:54,620 I'm gonna try and trust you. I believe that 523 00:40:54,703 --> 00:40:59,166 we can be extraordinary together rather than ordinary apart, and I wanna be... 524 00:41:25,942 --> 00:41:28,612 - I have to go. - What? 525 00:41:28,695 --> 00:41:31,657 In order to kiss you the way I want to kiss you, 526 00:41:31,740 --> 00:41:34,743 in order to do more than kiss you, 527 00:41:34,826 --> 00:41:37,454 I need to speak to Rose. 528 00:41:37,537 --> 00:41:42,417 I want my conscience clear so that I can do more than kiss you. 529 00:41:42,959 --> 00:41:44,336 [Exhales] 530 00:41:45,921 --> 00:41:47,339 Stay here. 531 00:41:48,882 --> 00:41:50,634 Don't move. 532 00:41:51,927 --> 00:41:53,428 Wait for me. 40669

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