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Don't tell her, though, that I said anything to you.

You know, Rick, I don't give 7-Eleven enough credit.

You see what those ones look like in Asia?

Like, like little grocery stores?

Porty!

What's that, pal?

Yeah, the new pool's pretty great.

Who are you texting?

Nobody.

Nobody?

Yeah, nobody.

Okay, fine.

Kind of a weird response.

Isn't that weird?

Privacy is a thing.

Says the guy who puts cameras everywhere.

Whatever.

Whatcha building in here?

Freeze ray?

Kinda, actually.

Making a beer that chills itself.

Morty!

Why are you being weird?

Let go of my phone, Morty!

Are you texting?

Nobody!

God, son of a... Come on!

What the fuck?

It's fine!

The fuck?

It's fine?

It's fine!

You're texting with that guy?

It's stupid, Morty.

Seriously, it's nothing.

Evil Morty's dangerous.

And evil!

Exactly.

Which is why sometimes he reaches out and threatens to erase our family.

Unless I... help him with stuff.

You work for that guy?

He's like a Q that makes me do things for him.

You know Q, Morty?

From Star Trek?

Okay, so imagine a cosmic gay guy obsessed with chess.

You gonna pick that up?

You gonna make this weird?

I'm not allowed to be concerned!

You sound insane right now.

Hello?

Shit.

What?

You don't answer my calls now?

Hi, Morty.

Yeah, feelings mutual.

Rick, I'm not interrupting something, am I?

I was just catching Morty here up on our... off-screen exploits.

You two don't share everything as a couple?

You know I hate you, right?

I do.

It's why I try to just tax...

Let's go.

What the heck?

Morty, you wanna come on this one?

At your own risk, obviously.

You know what?

Yeah, I will.

Morty.

Cool.

I think we can take him.

We?

Fuck you, I'm helpful.

You guys scheming over there?

No.

Yes?

Right.

Morty, you haven't seen this.

Anything happens to me?

Gone.

Forever.

Across all infinity.

Dude, they just sit there?

Always?

They're from an ideal hostage dimension where

everyone's super trusting and never has to shit.

There's no Morty.

If he erases you, he erases himself.

Can we move this along?

There's a guy eating the multiverse.

There's always a guy eating the multiverse.

His name is Frumble Wormple.

No, it's not.

It's not.

It calls itself the Collective.

At some point it'll reach the central finite curve, then it'll be our problem.

More exposition than I expected.

He does this to torture me.

No portals.

This thing absorbs our stuff and learns to make its own and we're fucked.

You're driving.

Do you guys usually talk, or is it different because I'm here?

Morty.

We usually talk.

It's boring physics stuff, Morty.

And you two defend the central finite curve together?

Since when do you care about anything?

I don't.

That's why I make him do it.

Thank dick we're here.

Oh, it sees us.

Get in the suit.

What?

Morty, this is multiversal galactic shit.

I have to focus a little harder than usual.

Get in the suit.

Make him wear the suit.

Evil Morty doesn't need the suit.

Morty, get in the suit or go home.

Oh, it disappears.

That's nifty.

What's that, nanomesh?

How's he breathing?

It recycles the oxygen internally.

Can he piss in there?

He can piss in there.

I won't need to.

Okay, sample container's done.

Should be absorption proof.

Huh, pretty small.

Nice.

Good stuff, Morty.

Very helpful.

Load your fucking thing in.

All set.

Let's wrap this up.

You are tremendous to be attempting this.

It will be an honor to absorb you.

Don't let it touch you.

Car, clear out.

Way ahead of you.

You can't outrun me.

You'll be me.

Oh, I get it.

Plant these charges.

We have absorbed countless technologies, Rick Sanchez.

One of them will be your equal.

Nice of you to explain.

The more you understand of the collective, the

easier you will be for the collective to absorb.

Lucky me.

This is me, but it is coating something that is not me.

We are the collective.

I am the collective.

I did not say or think those things, and I don't think I sound like that.

What are these?

Uh, definitely not charges of some kind.

I think that's exactly what they are.

I will absorb them.

Shit.

I am the Threads of Time, bound and perfected.

And your time is up.

What?

I do not understand.

I am the collective.

I absorb all.

Right, and you just absorbed a compression algorithm.

What?

Now you'll absorb yourself forever.

Impossible!

I am the collective!

I am the collective!

Way to get captured.

Obviously not my fault.

You really fucked me there, Morty.

Definitely not charges of some kind.

It was stressful, okay?

That was... cheese.

Although, getting captured kind of worked out.

I didn't mind it.

I like talking to that guy.

Yeah, way better than the dude from last week.

So you guys do stuff like that together a lot?

Only sometimes.

Oh.

Should we hit a diner?

Is that crazy?

Get some waffles?

What?

No!

Rick, tell Morty we're getting waffles.

Something to drink.

One, uh, two milkshakes, actually.

Coffee with vodka in it.

Amen.

You have fun, Morty.

Today was actually a pretty good one.

And you only threw us off a little.

My apologies.

All good.

Me and Rick just have a... rhythm.

It's a fiercely unsteady truce, Morty.

Either of us could backstab the other at any time.

I get why he never looped you in.

I mean, if I'm calling this guy, he must be this tall to ride, you know?

I'm sure.

Don't let him rile you up, Morty.

It's all dumb.

Mostly just levitating with power and screaming as our eyes glow.

Sometimes we do a huge beam together.

What even are you?

Jesus.

May I go to the bathroom, please?

I gotta give these waffles some runway.

What do I look like?

A bad guy?

You are... permitted.

He's a big softie once you get to know him, huh?

He even showed me some... time travel stuff.

I'm gonna shove these waffles up your ass, pal.

Heavens.

What the fuck are you doing here?

You gonna replace me?

I'm not sure what you're talking about.

Uh-huh.

Homewrecker.

You see this?

All this messy... whatever this is?

It's weakness.

Fuck you.

You know what?

Maybe I will steal your grandpa.

But not because I love him.

Because you do.

Here we go.

Two milkshakes for the two kinds of Mortys.

The one who does whatever he wants.

And the one who sucks my grandpa's dick.

You know what?

I'll drink both milkshakes.

This dick is shit so big it changed my brain chemistry.

What are we doing?

We order those waffles yet?

Can we go?

Morty, I took such a nice shit.

Don't make him tug my leash again.

Oh, we can call it.

Boy, this was great, though.

Thanks for coming along, Morty.

Rick, we gotta do this after missions more often.

Uh-huh.

This one's on me.

And, uh, till next time, Gramps.

I winked.

Maybe you couldn't tell because of the eyepatch.

We could tell.

Blackmailing prick.

Motherfucker!

Yeah!

I don't understand.

I put the blueprints for that dumb fucking Omega device in the Omega device, Morty.

It even wiped from every possible reality.

You mean... Yes, you possessive fucking nerd.

We're free of that hack bullshit once and for all.

Uh-oh, sweet bliss.

I'm already forgetting what we're talking about.

God, he brought you along to flex.

He showed you his lair.

That overconfident little bitch.

Predictable bitch!

That's what happens when you get too used to winning, Morty.

You start sucking your own dick, Morty.

He's gonna be coming for us, Morty.

He's coming, and he's gonna be pissed.

He doesn't have the luxury of subtlety anymore.

That smug dick.

Don't wanna murder the shit out of me, Morty.

That's why I built this place, Morty.

This whole dimension is a bunker, Morty.

Oh, man.

We live in the bunker now, Morty.

We might be here forever, Morty.

Bunker dimension!

So, Evil Morty thinks he's my nemesis.

Mostly just sucks.

But he is deadly.

Swallow this.

It's a kind of body armor goo so you can take some hits.

But only some.

I'm not made of body armor goo.

What about Space Beth?

Space Beth is mean to me sometimes.

There's an evil version of Morty?

Yes, Jerry, obviously.

Keep up.

He's crafty, he's evil, he's a pussy-ass bitch.

He doesn't think I know this, but his stupid Akira palm laser has a cool down.

You get 20 seconds after firing it to tackle him.

If he corners you, yell a slur.

A bad slur.

What?

That reaction exactly.

The worse the slur, the more time it buys you.

Jerry, pretend to shit your pants in fear.

I'll see what I can do.

So we just live here now?

On high alert.

But also, open your heart to the joys of the bunker dimension.

There's normal plumbing, and your friends and neighbors all have combat training.

Like Bunker Gene here.

Oorah.

At ease, PG.

Now, ballistics.

Evil Morty does have a force field.

It's annoying.

Is Bunker Gene from this dimension?

Or do you think we could have brought him here?

Seems like he used to be a marine.

No whispering.

Whispering's the first step to turning on each other.

He might go for that too.

Classic bunker maneuver.

Just let us stew in here until we go insane.

So we can't go insane, even if we live here forever.

More questions?

No further questions.

Do you wish I was smarter?

Oh, Morty, have some dignity.

I don't know, maybe it was all an act.

But he's powerful and confident, and you guys had real chemistry.

I can't even do chemistry homework.

He wears a villain accessory, Morty.

We are closing the book on this.

Evil Morty sucks.

You promise?

I promise.

Phew.

And you're sure he can't break in?

It's unlikely.

Unless he's canonically mastered the tech needed

to board through dimensional infrastructure.

I don't know, I don't keep track of that stuff.

I'm happy you don't like him more than me, Rick.

I think this one might be for keepsies, Morty.

Shoot to kill.

Roger that.

Did it work, sir?

It worked.

You

built a bunker dimension just for me.

I don't have to lie here.

I built it for a bunch of reasons.

You're not special, pal.

I don't need to be.

You're gonna watch me kill him.

Oh man, you sound as pressed as Morty was.

You do have a lot in common.

That's cute.

How many of those you got left?

Like, two?

Is it two?

Three?

Oh, fuck you!

You're really gonna do this?

You're really gonna try to make him shoot me?

That's your trick?

Just say your whole plan out loud so he doesn't suspect you?

Shit.

I really do hate you guys.

No, you don't.

That's the real reason you need to kill us right now.

Because for Rick, making me jealous was an act.

But for you?

Yeah, run, bitch.

You leaned in hard because you thought it was real.

Damn, Morty.

I saw what I saw, Rick.

He's got a big ol' crush on you.

I'd like to deny it, Morty.

But I'm pretty irresistible.

Well, maybe it's us who need to run, bitch.

Jerry!

Not helping, Dad!

Twenty seconds!

Jump him!

Get your little iPad, you piece of shit!

You like that?

That little time device you showed me?

I made one too.

Just like the portal gun.

Always struck me as odd that Rick's don't do time travel.

I get that it's messy, but so are you.

Anyways, good thing I'm not a Rick.

Hey, that's what I can see!

You're surrounded for a thousand years in any direction, you sick fuck!

Thanks for the tip-off.

A lot of people freezing time these days.

Just a concerned citizen officer.

This societal breakdown is what it is.

Nobody pulling over for ambulances no more neither.

Alright, get him out of here.

I want this kid processed yesterday.

Hey, wait up!

What?

Oh shit!

You touch me with that hand again and I'll fucking cube it, pal.

You're nothing.

You're less than nothing.

Morty's right.

You do have a crush.

You needed the cops to win.

Ugh, scoreboard.

Sorry, Morty.

You made it weird.

We were never a thing.

Uh-huh.

Enjoy prison, fucker!

Season nine, baby.

Only an indefinite number more.

Sure glad we didn't have to use those slurs.

Oh my god, same.

You had one ready?

No, don't act like you didn't.

Let's all say them at the same time.

Three, two, one.

Ew!

Ew!

Wow!

Evil Morty off the board for good, huh?

What are you gonna do now, Rick?

Nothing but green, you know?

Green grass in front of us, baby.

I need a vacation.

Oh.

Nice.

But you do like me more than him.

Don't be needy, Morty.

When are you in for, ape?

This is it?

You're not gonna put me in stasis for all of time?

Or, I don't know, remove my consciousness?

What?

Bro, this shit's supposed to be punitive.

What the hell sucks about going to sleep?

Nah, little man.

Y'all gonna be eating mush on a tray.

With like big aggro dudes that call you fish, relentlessly.

Damn.

I mean, you can get jacked.

But even then, you gotta hustle for that protein.

You guys have prison pegs.

We have forever to do it.

Did you get any of that?

you can find me on and pless support me https://www.youtube.com/@titoGamersHaven