Original subtitles

"If Herby Hall is reading this to you now,

"you know I didn't make it through the surgery.

"Now listen, Mrs. H, put down that Kleenex.

"Mr. H, stop wiping your eyes.

"Don't none of you waste one moment being sad about me.

"And that includes you, Marie."

Uh, these are his own words.

He sent them on to me.

It sounds just like him, Mr. Hall.

Yes.

"I had a great run,

"thanks mostly to you, Mr. and Mrs. H,

"and don't forget Freeway Jr., my pal.

"What a great friend you've been to me."

(CHUCKLES)

There's always going to be plenty of those special treats you like.

"It's all taken care of." (WHINES)

"Also, Herb knows what to do about my favorite charity,

"the orphanage in San Francisco."

Yeah, I grew up there

till I sold papers on the street and met Max.

"And now,

"to my dear grand-niece, Marie-Simone,

"I leave everything I've got left

"'cause you're everything to me a blood-relative could be.

"You make me so proud."

(CLEARS THROAT)

"Mr. and Mrs. H, you know we were planning this trip to Montreal

"before I got sick,

"so now don't disappoint me.

"You've got to follow through because I arranged

"a few surprises."

(LAUGHS)

What a remarkable man. (SIGHS)

"I ain't gonna tell you what they are right now.

"I'm gonna let Marie be in charge.

"I know you loved me

"and you know I loved you.

"We will always have each other.

"So just cherish the good times

"and remember what I always said,

"get on with the exciting business of life.

"Max."

That's it.

(WHISPERS) You all right?

Yeah, I'm all right.

How about you?

Thanks, Herb...

(CRYING)

...for your generosity.

He was a good friend.

He was like a father.

Real family.

An original.

(SIGHING) Yes.

The one and only.

MARIE: Kurt.

How'd it go?

Fine.

Been waiting long?

KURT: Just got here.

This is my fiance,

Kurt.

How do you do?

Hi, fine. Pleasure.

Marie has told us an awful lot about you.

(CHUCKLING) In fact, that's all she's told us about.

You've got paint on your nose.

Oh, sorry.

I've been working in the studio since dawn.

Is it gone?

Well, I guess Kurt's just crazy about his work.

And about you.

I think Max would approve, don't you?

I do indeed.

You're so nice.

No wonder he took such trouble to plan something very special for you.

Is it done?

I just put the finishing touch on before I left.

I didn't bring it with me because...

Well, we haven't had time to properly gift-wrap it yet.

Yes. Oh, that's unnecessary.

No, besides, I want you to see the shop

and meet Vivienne Blaine, my partner.

And there is some kind of itinerary Uncle Max planned,

which I have to go over with you.

JENNIFER: Sounds intriguing!

MARIE: Just leave it to me and you're going to have an unusual time.

JONATHAN: Well, there's no rush.

We're here in Montreal to enjoy our time, just like Max wanted.

JENNIFER: How's your French?

JONATHAN: Tres lousy.

(GASPS)

PHOTOGRAPHER: That's great, that's great. Perfect.

Thank you.

WOMAN: One with my husband. Honey, come over here.

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

Hey, Camilla.

PHOTOGRAPHER: That's perfect.

Jonathan?

Jennifer!

Oh, it's wonderful to see you two again!

Don't tell me you came all the way from California just for me.

Excuse me, gentlemen. Excuse me. Thank you very much.

Oh, hello!

Actually, we're here on a different matter,

but it's delightful to see you.

Oh, and you, too, darling!

We were so sorry to hear about Trevor.

I hope you got our note.

Yes, I did,

and your beautiful flowers.

(SIGHS) Oh, poor Trevor.

He was of a certain age, you know, and that

dreadful asthma finally took him from us.

But...

You are looking great, Jonathan. You're a lucky girl, Jennifer.

Yes, I know.

MAN: Darling. Oh...

Do you know my new husband, Ronnie Scott?

Only from your photographs.

I'm Jonathan Hart, this is my wife Jennifer.

How do you do?

You're an actor, aren't you?

Well, between book signings. (LAUGHS)

We were just about to have tea. Would you like to join us?

Great idea. I think it's this way.

Come on, Junior. Come on.

I have signed so many books that my fingers feel like a bunch of twigs.

Oh, Ronnie.

That was one of my favorite frames.

I didn't do it on purpose.

I'll have to get it fixed.

Well,

let's go.

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

CAMILLA: After Trevor died,

my whole life became Ashley Motors.

It became the child that he and I had never had,

till I met Ronnie.

Why didn't you sell Ashley Motors to that German syndicate?

Trevor had already left me a fortune.

What did I need with another one?

What you needed was me.

Absolutely.

What you don't need is Ashley Motors.

It takes up too much of your time and energy. Hmm...

You mean it takes up too much time and energy that could go towards you.

Jonathan,

weren't you interested in buying my company once?

I gave you an offer you could refuse,

and you did.

Are you still interested?

Why?

Have you changed your mind?

No, just

testing the waters.

Jennifer and I don't need Ashley Motors, either.

Of course not.

You've got it all.

We have each other. That's what counts.

MAN: Lady Ashley. Yes?

There's a phone call for you. Oh, thank you.

Excuse me.

Hello?

What?

(SCOFFS)

My dear woman, you definitely have the wrong number.

What was all that about?

Oh, just some lunatic on the loose.

I suppose when one's a celebrity, one must expect it.

Would you get the bill? I'd like to go.

JONATHAN: Oh, that's all right.

It'd be our pleasure. We're staying in the hotel, it'll make it easier.

Thank you.

Thank you.

You must come out to see us one day.

We rented this darling, little house in the country with a pool

so Ronnie can do his laps.

By the way, Jennifer, I want to ask you something.

Woman to woman.

What do you think of my title,

Dancing on the Glass Ceiling: Steps Every Woman Should Know?

Oh, Camilla, I always like your titles,

including Lady Ashley.

(CHUCKLES) That was the hardest one to come up with.

Thank God he was knighted before he died,

for his sake, of course. Of course.

Man to man, Jonathan,

you shoot skeet? Yes, I do.

(IN AUSTRALIAN ACCENT) Ah, we'll throw a few steaks on the barbie

shoot a few clay pigeons. (LAUGHS) Isn't he adorable?

Feel trapped?

I don't think we can get out of this one. (EXHALES)

Is this what's known as being steam-rollered?

I think so.

MARIE: Vivienne,

look at us.

I haven't seen that for years.

I brought it from home to show the Harts.

Remember?

How my Uncle Max took us to ride the carousel?

VIVIENNE: I always looked forward to those Sundays.

We only wanted to ride the carousel, leaning out to feel the wind.

(PHONE RINGING)

Why doesn't somebody answer that?

Might be a phone call. Hang on a second.

My girlfriend collects this stuff.

I really want it for her birthday.

This stuff happens to be called Limoges.

Well, whatever.

Hey...

You think I could possibly pay you something on each week?

I think you could possibly have us confused with Sears Roebuck.

You're not gonna help me out?

Oh, of course I'm gonna help you out.

Bonjour, can I help you?

RONNIE: Well, I hope so. Uh, may I?

Certainly.

I've got a broken picture frame.

Lovely workmanship.

RONNIE: Yeah, I wonder if you can repair it.

VIVIENNE: I think so.

The man who would know is out

but I'll get him to call you later.

If you want to come back with me, I'll get your name and number.

Was that you on the phone to Camilla?

Quiet. Marie and Freddy will hear.

Why did you jump the gun?

You said on the phone from London that you had the proof we needed.

Yeah, I had the stuff in my pocket,

sitting next to her.

You were supposed to wait until I gave them to you.

Keep your voice down.

Come on. Where's the passport and the prescription?

Don't be angry with me, please.

It's what the frame's all about.

They're inside.

All the proof we need is tucked right in there.

Put them in a safe place until I call you.

You've done it.

We've pulled it off.

You mean I pulled it off.

And it wasn't that easy.

Now it's your turn.

No more phone calls.

I've seen more of you in foreign hotel rooms than I have in my own hometown.

I told you it was going to be hard for me to get away

without her suspecting something.

Speaking of guns...

For your protection.

Protection against what?

Take it.

I'm not like Camilla, Ronnie.

I couldn't kill anybody.

(DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES)

MARIE: He's handsome, isn't he?

Hmm.

He's also married.

He's wearing a wedding band.

The story of my life.

(DOOR OPENS)

(DOOR OPENS)

KURT: They didn't have the exact kind we need.

There's one other place I can try.

Vivienne?

Hi!

Marie says there's something for me to repair.

Yes, here.

Oh, that's nice.

Must be from the '20s or '30s.

Oh...

There. I can repair it.

Might be a little expensive, though.

Oh, it's okay. This gentleman can pay.

Kurt, show Vivienne the clock.

You wanna see what Uncle Max commissioned me to do for the Harts?

Sure.

Of course I do. Please.

Voila.

My masterpiece.

Max was very specific about the details.

KURT: For instance,

the hands are stopping at 8:45.

Because that's when Jonathan met Jennifer.

When are you giving this clock to the Harts?

Now. They're coming over for it in a few minutes.

Out the door so fast?

KURT: Definitely.

Marie has been looking over my shoulder since I started this piece.

She wanted it finished perfectly.

It's perfect, it's finished,

it's out the door. Shouldn't we wait?

Why?

We could display it for a few days,

allow the public to shower you with praise.

Vivienne, that's one of the first things you have to get over when you're an artist.

Letting your work go.

JENNIFER: It looks fascinating.

Do we get to open it?

I wish you could open it now and I know Kurt would like nothing better,

but that's not what Uncle Max wanted.

And the winner is...

Wow.

Sealed envelopes.

This is better than the Academy Awards.

Well, Max always did things in a big way.

He ran the biggest off-track betting parlor in the States.

(LAUGHING) Yes, he did. And he did it right from our kitchen.

This one is to be opened now,

I'll give you the second one later

and the third at a very special time.

Do you know what's in all of them?

Now, no more questions. Just get ready to have a great time.

Well, shall I? Mm-hmm.

Go for it.

(IMITATING DRUMROLL)

Ta-da!

"Take the present over to the Havana Hayes

"and open it there.

"The gang is all waiting for you."

The Havana Hayes?

Well, if that's where we're going,

Freeway better get a breath of fresh air.

Uh, darling...

You know...

This way!

Salut.

(INDISTINCT FRENCH CHATTER)

(LAUGHING)

(TIRES SQUEAL)

(MAN YELLING IN FRENCH)

Hey!

Stop!

Stop!

Stop!

Is that your car?

Yes.

Kurt, what's going on?

Somebody stole my car.

Oh, my goodness.

MARIE: Be careful.

JONATHAN: Buckle up.

Which way?

Your guess is as good as mine.

Go straight.

Now go left.

(HORN HONKING)

(MAN YELLING IN FRENCH)

The keys are gone.

Well, I guess we should be thankful for small favors.

(MAN SPEAKING IN FRENCH)

(SPEAKING FRENCH)

(IN ENGLISH) This is your car?

This is my car.

This is our rental car.

This is my car.

Rented?

No.

Well, this is my car.

It's an unmarked police car.

I thought that's who you might be.

Detective Vachon.

JENNIFER: I don't suppose you're too happy with where our car,

our rented car,

is parked right now, are you, Detective?

Nor his.

(CLEARS THROAT)

Would you like to borrow my pen, Detective?

No, a cigarette.

Never mind, I'm trying to quit.

Thank you.

Names.

Jonathan Hart. Jennifer Hart.

Kurt Emmerich.

And what's that?

That's a present from a very special friend.

It was in the car.

And is it something someone might want to steal?

KURT: Don't think so.

Its value is only personal.

It's a work of art.

Kurt is the artist who made it.

DETECTIVE: Oh...

What is it? A surprise.

We don't know what it is.

We were just on our way to open it...

When my car was stolen.

Yes.

Did you see who stole it? We couldn't.

I suppose you'll want us to go down to headquarters and fill out the usual forms.

No.

BOTH: No?

That's only necessary if something's stolen.

May I have my pen back, Detective?

Oh...

DETECTIVE: (CLEARS THROAT) You have your rented car,

you have your surprise,

now you can go ahead and find out what it is.

Thank you.

Yes, thanks, I guess.

Uh, just one thing before you go.

BOTH: Yes?

Perhaps the artist could tell me what it is.

You see, in my business, we don't like surprises.

Well, that would be up to the artist.

(INAUDIBLE)

Really?

Charming.

And where is this place?

The Havana Hayes.

No, no, no.

Not the Hayes.

You know it?

Know it?

It's my favorite place.

WOMAN: Well, hi!

I'm Frances X. Gaylord.

Old Max always called me Goldie,

'cause that was my nom de theatre, you know, when we met.

Just Goldie.

Long time before just "Cher" or just "Madonna."

And I'm Lew Roth. Hello, Lew.

He left me the set of poker chips we played with as kids.

(LAUGHING)

Oh, of course,

I didn't expect anything, you know,

'cause Max already did enough for me and the kids.

The kids?

Oh, yeah. We had four boys and a girl.

You did?

Yeah, me and my late husband.

Oh, you though that... Yes!

Nah, but let me tell you,

Max helped out a lot through the years.

What a guy. Had had his faults like anybody.

I just can't think of any right now.

The last time I talked to him,

his thoughts were of you.

And now, well, we're celebrating his life.

(CHUCKLING)

Indeed we are.

You know, we rarely saw each other

but Max always kept in touch

by phone or mail.

Or fax.

We knew about all your adventures.

(CORK POPS)

It's time to open the present.

Ah! Ta-da!

LEW: I never knew Frances X. Gaylord was your real name.

You thought I was just Goldie?

What's the X for?

Expensive.

(LAUGHING)

JENNIFER: Oh, look!

"To Mr. and Mrs. H.

"When you two met, time stood still."

They met each other at a quarter to 9:00.

I got it.

You know, it really did stand still.

And so did my heart.

And if you press this,

it plays the Carnival of the Animals.

MARIE: Your favorite.

Really?

JENNIFER: Look, it's Freeway!

(BARKING)

JONATHAN: And you and me.

What a gift.

JONATHAN: Beautiful work. JENNIFER: Thank you, Kurt.

And now for the second envelope.

Theater tickets.

Concert tickets for tonight.

"Dear Mr. and Mrs. H,

"you've always appreciated two wonderful things in life,

"music and animals. So putting them together,

"here's two on row H

"for Carnival or the Animals.

Of course, it's in French but it sounds the same.

"Enjoy, Max"

Ah. A toast.

To our dear friend, Max,

who loved giving so much that life with him was like

Christmas 364 days of the year, wasn't it?

Yes, it was.

And he not only played Santa for us,

but he played for every orphanage and half-way house from Montreal to Malibu.

And I don't have to tell you all,

that anytime we'd ever say to him,

"Max, you know, you're a great guy,"

he'd say...

ALL: "No, but hum a few bars and I'll fake it."

(LAUGHING)

To Max. To Max!

To Max.

(BARKS)

CAMILLA: Well, mind you don't shoot yourself in the foot.

RONNIE: We'll bring you some clay pigeons for the barbie.

JONATHAN: Don't get nervous when we say "pull."

CAMILLA: Well, gee. While they do their little boy thing,

let's you and I have a glass of champagne.

Oh, it's a little early in the day for me.

Nonsense.

It'll make you feel better.

I feel fine, really.

Well, when you've had four, like I have...

Husbands that is, not glasses of champagne...

You won't feel so fine.

But of course,

you'll be married to Jonathan till death do you part.

I certainly hope so.

If you don't mind my saying so, Camilla,

I've never seen you in such a dark mood.

Yes, I know. I'm sorry.

Come on, let's sit down.

Get away from these burning coals.

Good. You stay there.

(FREEWAY BARKS)

First, there was Willie.

I got the first real money I could call my own from him.

That got me started.

Oh, but don't get me started on Willie.

If he hadn't died,

I think I'd have murdered him.

But I thought he was the great love of your life.

Oh, he was.

But we were so passionate, we never stopped fighting.

And then there was Trevor.

No, then there was Binky.

Binky had the stately home

but not a bean.

And then there was dear, darling Trevor and his asthma.

I got the title from him.

(GUNSHOT)

RONNIE: Nice shot.

And now there's Ronnie. RONNIE: Pull.

(GUNSHOT)

(GUNSHOT)

I don't dare tell you what I got from him.

Should I dare to ask?

JONATHAN: (IN DISTANCE) Pull.

Look (GUNSHOT)

What? (GUNSHOT)

See this bruise?

Where? Right here.

Is that what you got from Ronnie?

No, that's not what I got from Ronnie. I...

I'm blind as a bat. I walked into a wall.

Oh.

Well, then, what did you get from Ronnie?

A surprise. A very big surprise.

I think he's trying to kill me.

Really? (GUNSHOT)

What makes you think that?

Well, he said that I exasperated him so much

that sometimes he wished I was dead.

Well, that's

not exactly like trying to kill you, now is it?

(SIGHS)

In all fairness, I suppose not.

You fell in love with Jonathan for his moral fiber, didn't you?

Well, yes, and...

I've never been a good judge of character, Jennifer.

I never judge them for their moral fiber.

I never have.

(GUNSHOTS)

He's up to something.

He may not be trying to kill me, but he's up to something with someone.

With someone?

Oh, you know something?

I'm scared.

I...

I know that sounds funny, but...

I really am scared.

Now I've ruined my mascara.

RONNIE: Pull.

(GUNSHOT)

I just can't get it out of my mind.

Camilla was so strange.

You know, she even suggested that Ronnie had a girlfriend.

Did you hear me, darling?

(FREEWAY GROWLING)

What is that?

What is that?

Oh, boy, look at this. Come on, come on.

What is this?

What is this? (LAUGHING)

What are we doing? Is this a surprise?

Come on, Freeway.

Okay...

(HUMMING TUNE)

A surprise...

Come on, come on, Freeway.

Almost there.

Oh! I knew it!

Oh!

I saw you looking at it in Kauffman's window.

Were you keeping an eye on me?

Both of them. I never let you out of my sight.

(LAUGHING)

Oh, it's beautiful! You like it?

I love it.

Well, you are my bird. You know that, don't you, darling?

Yes, I do!

Give us a kiss.

Mm...

(DOORBELL RINGS)

Which side should I wear it on? This side or this?

I like it there. Oh, good.

Oh, Freeway!

Now, you be a good boy.

(SPEAKING FRENCH)

This way.

Madame.

JENNIFER: Bonsoir.

Bonsoir!

(GIGGLING)

Did you like my Cary Grant? I loved your Cary Grant.

Well, if you like my Cary Grant, let me do a little...

Wait, wait, wait. My turn. My turn.

Who's this?

(MUTTERS INDISTINCTLY)

Who's that? Candice Bergen.

Katharine Hepburn! I knew that.

I forgot my purse, I'm sorry.

I'll get it. Okay.

I'll get the elevator.

It takes hours to get here.

(GROWLING)

Excusez-moi.

(DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES)

Bonsoir, Madame Hart.

This car is going up.

Up? Oh. Yes.

There you are. Monsieur Hunnicut,

you say that house-keeping has not helped you, huh?

No, that's why I called you.

That femme de chambre, Helene, went off to the linen closet and never came back.

Edna, my wife, has been waiting in the shower, waiting for dry towels for

a half an hour!

Excuse me.

Vern Hunnicut, Hannibal, Missouri.

Hi, Vern. I don't think Helene understood my French.

Maybe you should have spoken English to her.

Darling, the elevator. MANAGER: Helene!

Helene!

We lost it.

This is Vern Hunnicut from Hannibal, Missouri.

This is my wife, Jennifer.

Hi. How do you do?

Nice to meet you.

Helene? (MUFFLED MOANING)

Helene?

Helene!

What are you doing on the floor of the hallway?

With a handkerchief around your head like this?

You're all tied up.

I was getting the towels for Mr. Hunnicut from Hannibal, Missouri,

and the next thing I know,

I wake up with a lump on my head

the size of a pamplemousse!

Size of a pample-what?

A grapefruit, Monsieur Hunnicut.

You see, this is the reason...

Why don't you try talking to the maid in our room?

What maid?

The night maid.

Night maid? What night maid?

Monsieur Hart, night housekeeping doesn't come on for another half an hour.

Call the house detective.

Jonathan.

Aw, shucks.

You nice folks are gonna be late for your concert

and it's all 'cause of me.

We'll catch the second act, Vern. That's when they'll be playing our song.

She must have got away through the service entrance.

Yeah, that makes sense.

You didn't recognize this woman, did you?

No, I didn't.

I really didn't.

And you, Madame Hart?

I didn't, either.

Truck driver on the bridge this afternoon said that it was

a woman who ran away from your friend's vehicle.

This has all been too much excitement for me.

I need a cigar to chew on.

How about you, Detective?

Mm...

I've quit smoking

again,

but maybe a chocolate.

Night maid left in such a hurry, she forgot her basket of treats.

I'll have just one.

That's the main reason I come to Canada.

You can still get a good Havana Panatela.

Anyone else?

BOTH: No, thanks.

Pillow mint?

BOTH: No, thanks.

Well, thanks for everything.

DETECTIVE: Merci, Monsieur Hunnicut.

Nothing's still been stolen

so you still don't have to come down with me.

Darling, we'll miss the concert.

You were lucky she missed you.

I think I was lucky that she didn't really know how to use a gun.

Odd that an amateur thief seems as persistent as a professional.

Anyway...

Bonne soiree, Madame Hart, Monsieur Hart.

(SPEAKING FRENCH)

Pillow mint? Merci.

What is it that's so

special about Max's gift?

Whoever stole Kurt's car obviously wanted our clock.

Well, anyone would want it.

Look.

Did you ever notice that from 1 to 12,

there's a message from Mother Nature.

All day, all night.

The cat is chasing the mouse, the mouse is chasing the bird,

the bird is chasing the bee.

Naturally.

The birds and the bees.

The bee is bothering the blossom,

the tortoise is after the hare.

Looks like a rabbit to me. It looks like he's chasing another rabbit.

Well, naturally.

And the hound is chasing the fox and the fox is

after the... After the furrier.

And guess what. What?

(DOG BARKING)

JONATHAN: The boy is chasing the girl.

Oh, maybe the girl is chasing the boy.

Well, have it your way.

No, it's all right.

I like yours, too.

Ain't nature grand?

(GIGGLING)

I can't believe you didn't get it.

That's right. For the second time, I didn't get it!

I manage to steal Camilla's old passport,

bribe the pharmacist for a copy of the prescription,

and you can't hang on to it long enough for us to blackmail her!

Go on and say it.

I failed you again.

How could you be so stupid in the first place?

Why didn't you put it in the safe instead of that stupid clock?

I do a lot of stupid things.

Falling in love, for instance.

Yeah...

Falling in love can be lethal.

Camilla found that out with Trevor.

I've never asked you...

How'd you find out?

Pillow talk.

You must have a wealth of information

from a wealth of women.

I'm only interested in wealth.

This gun's been fired.

Yes, it has.

You didn't hit anyone, did you? No.

Failed again.

What do you mean?

The Harts left, but then he suddenly came back.

I panicked

and fired.

Great.

Now the cops have got something to trace.

(SIGHS)

We don't even get out of hotel rooms

in the city where I live.

Well, that'd be all I'd need is

some doorman that reads a tabloid see me walk out of your apartment.

Your wife's frame is repaired and ready for pickup.

Why don't you be a good boy and go get it for mama.

What do I owe you?

No charge.

Partial payment for my mistakes.

Vivienne, the Harts are going to a concert tonight.

Check it out?

Go home to your wife, Ronnie.

Come on. We got a great future here. Let's not blow it now.

Get out.

Get out.

Get out, Ronnie!

(DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES)

Did she get it?

You don't see it in my hands, do you?

And I can tell you it's not in my pocket, either.

The Harts still got it.

Well, I'm sure they do.

Find them and get it.

I don't care what you have to do.

Understand?

(DIALING)

Yeah, the Harts still have the clock.

Right.

Let's go.

I can't believe you brought it.

I don't wanna let it out of my sight.

You sure you don't wanna check it? No, I don't.

(CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING)

(WHISPERING) I think there's someone in your seats.

We could take those two seats back there.

We're a bit late. MAN: Shh!

No.

No. You paid for those seats

and they're yours.

Psst.

Out.

Madam, would you like me to check that parcel for you?

No, thank you. MAN: Shh!

There are two seats back there.

All right. WOMAN: Shh!

Thank you.

Excuse me.

Sorry. So sorry.

WOMAN: Shh!

(MUSIC INCREASES IN TEMPO)

(CLOCK BARKING AND JINGLING)

I don't know you.

Could you please... Sorry.

(BARKING AND JINGLING CONTINUES)

USHER: Psst.

Madam, pass that down.

(CLOCK BARKING AND JINGLING)

(SIGHS)

What a heavenly experience.

Well, thanks to you, it was quite another experience for me.

I really am sorry.

I think we better go collect our clock.

I think we better head for the hills.

MAN: Thank you very much.

WOMAN: Monsieur.

Oh, this is back in the parcel room. Once moment.

(SCREAMS)

(CROWD CLAMORING)

Call an ambulance!

(INDISTINCT CHATTER)

May I borrow your pen, Mr. Hart?

Well, that's two.

Why would anyone want to shoot someone for our clock?

Now something has been stolen.

And I guess you want us to come down to headquarters, right?

(CHUCKLES)

How did you guess?

Claude.

Claude, no smoking there.

Detective, in the lobby, smoking is permitted.

No, smoking is not permitted there in the lobby,

smoking in permitted here, next to me!

I'd like a little secondary pleasure, if you don't mind.

(SIGHING)

That poor man.

It was only a flesh wound.

He fainted.

Probably at the sight of his own blood.

Well, it'll be interesting to see if the bullet that clipped him

is the same kind as the one that missed me.

Yeah.

We can go now, in my car.

It's the unmarked one, remember?

So...

How long are you planning to grace us with your presence in Montreal?

Oh, is that your way of telling us not to leave town?

Au contraire. I mean no offense,

but I wish you would leave.

We're seeing far too much of each other, don't you think?

Not until we get our clock back.

I thought not.

I know, Madame Hart. You don't like thieves.

May I have my pen back, Detective?

Oh...

Yes, of course.

Shall we?

Thank you.

MAN: So...

They had the clock when they came in.

Yeah, but they don't have it now.

Vivienne must have finally got it.

MARIE: I don't believe it.

What a mess.

Strange,

but nothing much here seems to be missing.

You're right.

Just trashed.

I don't understand how anyone...

Honey...

Don't worry.

You and Vivienne have insurance,

and not that much is broken.

Just... FREDDY: Trashed.

Big-time trashed.

JENNIFER: Mm.

Watch this.

(GIGGLING)

Junior...

Look at this. Come on, Junior.

There we go!

(PHONE RINGING)

Yes?

Yeah, put him through.

Kurt, good morning.

Yeah...

Really good.

Come here, you can have some more. Yes, uh...

We'll be right over.

Bye-bye.

What was that?

Somebody turned the antique shop upside-down.

Well, that makes three.

First I get shot at,

then our clock is stolen and now this.

Three strikes, your out.

At least now we're up.

Marie...

It'll be okay, hmm?

(CRYING)

Marie...

MARIE: You come by for your envelope from Uncle Max and look what you get instead.

Another surprise.

We phoned Vivienne and got her machine.

She must be on her way.

Who would have done such a vicious thing?

Maybe they were looking for something.

Like what? KURT: I don't know.

Maybe they thought they'd find money or something really valuable.

Oh, there's Vivienne now.

I'd better go to her.

Are you okay? I'm fine.

Really.

Please don't worry about me.

Shall I go with you?

No, I better speak to her alone. Excuse me.

Where's Vivienne?

She just went to the office.

What did she say?

Didn't say a word.

She must be in shock.

You better go see about her.

Hello?

Les Antiques.

VIVIENNE: This was between you and me.

Now the shop is ruined.

I hope you're satisfied.

What makes you think whoever did it had anything to do with me?

Because I know it was you.

RONNIE: Where's the clock, Vivienne?

Right where I want it.

RONNIE: You know, the police are very interested in

who shot that usher.

VIVIENNE: Really?

Well, why don't you tell them who it was

and why,

and why you know so much.

I couldn't help overhearing.

Why have you done this, Vivienne?

You'd do anything for Kurt, wouldn't you?

I don't know.

I don't think that I'd do anything for him that I thought was wrong.

No, you wouldn't.

That's where you and I are different.

I fell in love with the wrong man

and I didn't care what I did when I thought he loved me.

And now you don't believe that anymore.

Now I think he's just using me.

Vivienne,

come to your senses. It's too late.

I shot a man to get a clock.

Vivienne...

My life is ruined anyway.

Don't say that. We'll

contact a good lawyer. We'll go to the police to...

No.

I want you to help me do something.

He's gonna tip them off somehow.

But I'm gonna get him before he gets me.

I want you to drive me somewhere.

I have nothing left to lose.

Okay, I...

I'll do whatever you want.

I'll go wherever you want.

Just don't hurt yourself.

Put the gun down.

Put the gun down.

Please.

Vivienne's with Marie. She's got a gun.

What?

FREDDY: There they are.

Come on, Junior. (BARKS)

(CAR ALARM CHIRPS)

VIVIENNE: I think the Harts are behind us.

Don't let them catch us, Marie. Try to lose them. Please!

I'm trying, Vivienne. I'm trying.

Where could she possibly be going?

I can't imagine.

Well, they must have something in mind.

Be careful, darling. Remember, she's got a gun.

Whoops.

JONATHAN: Almost missed that.

Run the stop sign. No!

Run the stop sign, Marie!

(HORN BLARING)

Are you trying to kill us? Drive.

That was close.

What are they doing?

Beats me. We'll find out.

Put the gun down, please.

Just do as I ask.

JONATHAN: This is strange.

Looks like we're on a racecourse.

That's because we are.

Don't get too close or she might panic.

(VIVIENNE HUMMING)

VIVIENNE: This is it.

Turn here.

Look out! Marie!

(WOMAN SCREAMING)

MAN 1: I can't believe it!

MAN 2: Are they all right?

Honey!

Are you all right?

MARIE: I'm all right.

(FREEWAY BARKING)

Marie! Please help Vivienne.

Something's wrong with her. Darling...

Kurt, hold Junior.

(MUSIC PLAYING)

MAN: Where are you going?

No.

Feel the wind, Marie!

Feel the wind!

JONATHAN: Vivienne!

(GASPS)

Vivienne.

Drop the gun and I'll help you.

Vivienne.

I can't make it.

The wind loves us!

(SCREAMING)

(THUDS)

(MARIE CRYING)

JENNIFER: Darling...

Look at this.

JONATHAN: Ronnie and Vivienne.

Now, there's a couple.

JONATHAN: Amazing.

RONNIE: You talking to me?

Yo! You talking to me?

Hey! Are you talking to me?

(LAUGHS)

Hey! Are you talking to me?

Do you know, darling, I think you really might make it as an actor after all.

I love it when you show me your talent.

Well, it's a part I've been working hard on for a long time.

(GIGGLES)

Well, it's not faint praise but I thought your performance was

very convincing.

You're a tough critic,

so I'm always pleased with any sort of praise from you.

I can't believe she had this secret life.

She was such a sad person,

even as a little girl.

But she was always happy when Uncle Max came to visit me.

He paid attention to her, too.

He... He took us for carousel rides.

She loved that.

She loved...

Oh, my God,

the wind in her face.

That was the last thing that she said before she fell.

The wind loves us.

We used to say that

every lovely, warm summer.

Maybe I should take you home, hmm?

That's a good idea, Kurt.

I think I have to be by myself now.

Oh, I have to give you the last envelope.

Oh, that's unnecessary right now.

Yes, I do. That's what Uncle Max wanted.

Well, we'll come and pick it up.

Bye-bye, Marie.

KURT: Bye.

Bye.

I wonder what Vivienne did with the clock.

Vivienne had the clock?

That's what she said.

Maybe it wasn't Vivienne who wanted the clock at all.

Maybe it was Ronnie who wanted it.

Interesting idea.

Maybe Camilla's suspicion wasn't so wrong.

Maybe it's like Kurt's car.

Vivienne wasn't trying to steal the car,

she was trying to steal the clock that was in the car.

So...

Maybe it's not the clock that everyone and their brother is after, after all.

Maybe it was something that was in the clock.

What if we invite Camilla and Ronnie to dinner?

Well, if we did...

Maybe we'd find out.

Maybe.

(PHONE RINGING)

Hello.

(MAN SPEAKING ON TV)

Jonathan!

Tonight?

No, no, no.

I adore spur of the moment.

We'd love to.

8:30-ish? REPORTER: They've identified

the woman who fell from the tower of the Biosphere as Vivienne Blaine,

partner in an antique shop on Rue Notre-Dame. Oh, no.

No...

What's the matter, darling?

That's the shop where I took the picture frame to be fixed.

The girl that died waited on me.

Oh... How tragic.

After all, she was just...

She was just a salesgirl.

I didn't know her.

No...

Of course not.

How could you?

Shocking, the coincidence of it all, I guess.

Well,

violence is all around us these days.

People don't even feel safe in their own beds.

Don't you feel safe in your bed, Camilla?

Shouldn't I?

(MELLOW MUSIC PLAYING)

(WOMAN LAUGHING)

No wonder our frame wasn't repaired.

That woman was too busy stealing your clock.

Are you sure she stole it?

Oh, we know she did.

Do you know what she did with it?

We know what we did with it.

You have the clock?

BOTH: Mm...

Have another drink, old sport?

Uh, no, thanks.

It's getting past my bedtime.

Oh, Ronnie. That's not like you.

You're usually a real party animal.

Oh, I don't know about the party.

And it is our last night.

Well, you're not leaving tomorrow.

Just as soon as we pick up our clock.

Pick it up? I thought you said you had it.

Oh, it needed a few touchups

so we took it back to Kurt,

the artist who created it.

It got a little bruised with all the attention it's been getting lately.

Mm.

It happens.

BOTH: Mm.

Ah! They're playing my favorite song.

Would you like to dance?

I'd love to.

If Jennifer wouldn't mind me having you alone on the dance floor.

Not at all.

In fact, I'm...

I'm so happy that we've gotten our clock back,

I wouldn't mind a turn myself.

Well, my dance card is filled but I'm sure that

Ronnie here's got a lot of rhythm.

Ronnie?

I'm really not much of a dancer.

Oh, I'll bet that's a lie.

Shall we dance?

I'd love it.

Must you really leave Montreal so soon?

Well, now that we have our clock back,

there's really no reason to stay.

No reasons, Jonathan?

What have you got in mind?

Mm... Negotiations.

Ashley Motors. (LAUGHS)

What else?

First you don't want to sell,

then you do.

What's going on, Camilla?

What would you say

to a partnership?

Oh, I don't know.

We're both sort of

all-or-nothing people, aren't we?

(LAUGHS)

You really do know me so well.

Well enough.

Well...

If you stay in town a little while longer,

maybe I'll make you an offer you just can't refuse.

Hmm.

Perhaps I could be of help and have the clock packed and sent to you.

Oh, Ronnie...

(LAUGHS)

How very generous of you,

but we're so attached to it.

We don't want its hands to leave our hands.

Ah!

Oh, Ronnie, you are a wonderful dancer.

I imagine Vivienne thought so, too.

Shall we change partners?

Love it!

Thank you so much.

That was cute,

says that.

How'd it go?

I think he thinks we have it

and I don't think he can think of anything else.

Look.

They're back at the table.

That was wonderful, Camilla.

Like another dance?

Look, I've had enough. I'd like to get some air.

That sounds great. I'd like a little fresh air myself.

How about you, darling? Wonderful. Camilla?

RONNIE: On the other hand, it's late

and I need to get up early,

so why don't we just go home?

Fine.

There's certainly enough air in the country for both of us.

Good night and thank you.

Good night.

Good night!

I'm sorry.

Well, things were certainly different.

You know, it's funny,

I've never seen Ronnie so eager to get to bed.

Good night. Thanks.

Good night. Good night.

BOTH: Hmm...

(GLASS BREAKING)

(FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING)

Instead of taking the air, Ronnie,

you should've taken a taxi.

Where's the clock?

If you don't tell me, I'm gonna kill you.

It's not here.

You said you had it. Where is it?

That's what we'd all like to know.

Vivienne told you about us.

Hey, Ronnie...

We travel, too, huh?

London, Paris, Rome...

Just like you.

You call the police, Kurt?

Yeah, just as you asked.

I told you, don't move.

(BOTH GRUNTING)

Darling, are you all right?

Yeah, I'm all right. Kurt?

Yeah, I'm okay.

What about you? I'm fine, but you don't look so fine.

He's got quite a punch.

And a pretty good kick, too.

And in the dark.

RONNIE: Let's get outta here.

DETECTIVE: I'm sorry, Lady Ashley,

but your husband is wanted for breaking and entering and attempted murder.

Attempted murder?

Mr. and Mrs. Hart and their artist friend

said that he shot at them late last night and then ran away.

I... I can't believe it.

Why would he do that to them?

We've come to take Mr. Scott in for questioning.

I'm very sorry, but

my husband didn't come home last night.

You see, we haven't been getting along very well lately and...

I doubt whether he'll be back at all.

Ever.

Yes, I do see.

But I assure you that

if he does come back, I'll let your office know right away.

I know we're talking about a person to whom you're married, but...

I must insist.

Some people might be reluctant, given such a trusted relationship,

but I've always believed it's better not to fight City Hall.

As you've probably heard, Lady Ashley,

you can't.

Good day.

Good day.

Thanks.

You had me convinced.

Maybe I should be taking acting lessons from you.

(SCOFFS)

I think you ought to take them from someone.

I'd stay out of sight if I were you.

Why? This place is in the middle of nowhere.

They'd be watching this house if it were in the middle of Piccadilly Circus.

You can't hide here.

What are you saying?

Are you throwing me to the wolves?

It doesn't hurt a wolf to be thrown to the wolves.

You've been having an affair with that Vivienne creature, haven't you?

Camilla, she didn't mean a thing to me.

(SCOFFS)

You stole an old passport of mine from the safe.

In England, you gave it to her.

You were going to blackmail me.

All right.

I was scared.

I thought you were gonna leave me with nothing.

Oh, you don't lie convincingly, Ronnie.

It was Vivienne who phoned me the night of the book signing.

Well, that was her stupid idea.

You're going to double-cross her, too?

Her shop was just a convenient place for you

to stash the stuff until you put the bite on me.

Then it was going to be "Goodbye, Vivienne"

until something went wrong.

Well, you seem to have it all figured out.

Oh, yes.

And now it's going to be "Goodbye, Ronnie"

and this time nothing is going to go wrong

because when I'm in control, that's what happens.

Well, you wouldn't want my two employees here to

mess up that beautiful face of yours, now would you?

Paul and Henri are very good at what they do.

They may work for you, but you work for me.

I am your employer and therefore theirs.

Checkmate.

Sorry, darling. The boys work for me.

We've always worked for her.

You better stick to your bad acting.

(CHUCKLES)

What are you gonna have them do to me?

Just take you to the airport.

I don't want revenge, Ronnie.

I just want you as far away from me as possible.

But you said you loved me.

Oh, I did

in my fashion.

But being in love is a career in itself.

It takes up far too much time and energy.

And besides,

I already have a career.

Ashley Motors?

That's really who you are, isn't it?

Absolutely.

Ashley Motors is a metaphor for my life.

A long time ago,

I decided to travel

that open road that most men travel.

What's a metaphor?

CAMILLA: Ask your acting teacher.

You should be grateful to me, darling,

that you're going away instead of being slung in jail.

(PHONE RINGING)

Hello.

Hello, Jonathan.

Oh.

Wha... How terrible. How's Jennifer?

BARTENDER: Here you are.

Well, what's really important about this ghastly experience

is that you're both in one piece.

Two pieces.

One and a half.

I'm really shocked that Ronnie could do such a thing.

You know, I'm not talking about attempted murder.

Oh, no?

CAMILLA: Oh, no.

I told you I thought he was capable of that,

but breaking and entering? That is really surprising.

What's in the clock, Camilla?

Jonathan.

What a question.

Only you've got the clock, you should know.

We only said that because we wanted to see if Ronnie would take the bait.

JONATHAN: And he did.

He bit. Hook, line and sinker.

Ah...

So you don't have the clock?

Well,

I must say it's all terribly intriguing, but then,

anything you two do is always terribly intriguing.

We thought maybe Ronnie told you what was in the clock.

Ronnie never tells me anything.

I never knew why he wanted the clock,

I certainly never knew he was having an affair with that woman.

I don't even know where he is!

He's completely disappeared.

Well, now, I must say, Camilla.

You don't seem very upset by his disappearance.

You're right.

I'm not.

In fact, I'm relieved.

Now I can leave Montreal in peace.

Yes, uh, we're going to leave, too.

Just as soon as we go and say goodbye to those nice people at the antique shop.

Really?

Yes. It does seem like a waste of time,

waiting around to see if something turns up.

I mean, it could be next week,

next year,

maybe never.

Mm...

Well, it's only been divine, seeing you again.

And if you do decide to sell Ashley Motors,

let me be the first to get the call.

It's a deal,

but don't hang by the thumbs, Jonathan.

I can be almost as stubborn as you can.

Goodbye, Jennifer. Goodbye, Camilla.

This is too triste.

I hope everything works out the way you want it to.

It usually does,

and I hope the same for you, too.

Thank you for lunch and bon voyage, mes amis.

Smart lady.

What do you think?

Maybe we hooked another one.

Paul? Henri?

Did you see him onto the plane?

Yes. Right.

Well, now what I want you to do is to watch the Harts' hotel,

and I want you to check out the antique shop and watch everyone

very, very carefully.

You think they suspect why we want the clock?

I'd stake my life on it.

You don't know Jonathan Hart like I do.

We're very much alike.

He never gives up and neither do I.

Even if I have to have you kill them.

Is it morning?

Ah, did I wake you?

What are you doing up?

Just thinking about our clock.

Oh, which reminds me. What time is it?

Early.

It must be early if Freeway's not up.

Marie and Vivienne used to say

"The wind loves us" when they rode the carousel.

Marie said they used to shout it to each other.

That was the last thing Vivienne said before she fell.

I'll never forget it.

What are you thinking?

Well, I'm thinking that maybe Vivienne was trying to tell Marie something.

Like

where she had hidden Kurt's clock.

On a carousel?

Well, in it or under it

or around it. I don't know.

You wanna go visit the amusement park?

Do you think it's too early to call Marie and ask her to meet us there?

Oh, not over this.

Want a cafe au lait?

Make it a double. (FREEWAY WHINING)

Hello, this is Jonathan Hart.

Could you send us up two cafe au laits, please?

(BARKS)

And a little something to soothe the soul of a savage beast?

Thanks.

MARIE: Are you really leaving town?

JENNIFER: No.

JONATHAN: We thought if we said goodbye to Camilla,

we might force her to make a move.

KURT: Well, it worked with Ronnie.

JONATHAN: Well, what do you think?

JENNIFER: Maybe?

It's so charming, I can understand how it would leave an impression.

MARIE: Vivienne couldn't forget it.

Right up to the end.

JONATHAN: Well, should we give it a try?

Come on, Freeway. Come on.

Up there.

Good boy.

Good boy.

Go on.

Go on.

There's nothing up here!

Freeway! (WHISTLES)

(FREEWAY WHINING)

What's up?

(BARKING) Good boy!

Good boy, Freeway.

(CLOCK BARKING)

JONATHAN: Honey!

Here it is! You found it?

Ta-da! MARIE: Oh, yeah!

Oh, great!

I'll take that clock, s'il vous plait.

I'm so glad I caught you before you left.

Well, if it isn't la dame au Camilla.

Long time, no see.

It worked a second time!

I wonder what that says about our telling people we're leaving town.

It means they go crazy trying to check out your

duty-free items.

What are we going to do about Lady Ashley?

I'll

leave her to you.

What goes around, comes around.

Oh.

I said give me the clock.

Are you sure you want it?

If I don't take it, Paul and Henri will.

Well, then I'll give it to you.

But Kurt and I have some surprises for Paul and Henri.

Right, Kurt?

(GRUNTS)

(FREEWAY GROWLS)

MARIE: Careful!

Stop! Don't make me shoot you, Mr. Hart.

JONATHAN: Darling!

Catch! I got it!

He's coming after you!

I see him!

Here! Got it!

No more tricks.

Hand over the clock, Mr. Hart.

JENNIFER: Jonathan!

Home run, darling?

Over the fence!

Gertrude Shazlinski?

Gertrude Shazlinski?

Jonathan!

Gertrude Shazlinski!

Who?

Have you ever heard of

timolol maleate eye drops?

No.

Well, this is a prescription for timolol maleate eye drops.

It says "not to be taken

"by people with asthma."

How's it work, Gertrude?

It leaves you breathless.

As Trevor found out.

You used your old passport with your real name

to have that prescription filled out, didn't you?

Yes, it was quick and painless

and poor Trevor didn't feel a thing.

I really liked him.

Yeah,

and you loved his money, too.

But what about Ronnie?

He's in custody.

Never got further than Toronto.

Get in, Mrs. Shazlinski.

Lady Ashley, please.

CAMILLA: What a dreadful vehicle.

Detective Vachon,

have you ever been in the driver's seat of an Ashley?

Not really.

Get in.

Au revoir, Jonathan.

A bientot, Jennifer.

The bullet that missed you and the one that clipped the coat attendant

were fired by Vivienne's gun,

which was registered to Mr. Scott.

Ronnie Scott?

Yeah.

Detective Vachon,

that is what is known as a smoking gun.

Mm-hmm.

Mm...

What the heck?

So this is where we say goodbye.

And here's the last envelope.

Before we open it...

If Max could arrange three envelopes for us, we can arrange one

for you.

This will help you repair the antique shop.

And as Max always said, "Get on with the exciting business of life."

I guess he have me that piece of advice when I was about 15 years old.

He always said that life is truly exciting

if you only live it.

And Max lived it to...

Well, I guess you'd say he lived it to the, uh,

to the max.

We won't forget that.

And you promise you'll come to our wedding?

We wouldn't miss it for the world.

We'll be there.

Bye, Kurt. Bye.

Thanks for everything. Goodbye.

Kurt. Thank you.

Uh, so... So?

Start walking.

Over there.

All right. (LAUGHING)

Come on, Junior. Go on, open it!

"Dear Mr. and Mrs. H,

"I know by now you must have got yourselves in a mess of trouble,

"like you always do,

"and got out of it, too, by now.

"So it's time you looked at the clock

"and stop and smell the roses

"and the coffee and the Canadian bacon.

"Now you're walking,

"but don't look up yet.

"Okay, now stop.

"And now, Mr. and Mrs. H,

"raise your heads to the right."

Wow.

Is that the surprise?

"That's right. You got it.

"I want you to sail up the St. Lawrence on this ship

"and get on with what I told you in the first place.

"My devotion to you

"and for you is for now

"and for eternity.

"And as usual,

"I'll be there to buzz you in the gate.

"Max."

Well, shall we get on with it?

Yeah.

BOTH: Thanks, Max.

(FREEWAY BARKS)

(WHINES)

(BARKS)

(CLOCK MUSIC PLAYING)