Original subtitles

Of course you're not supposed to be this way.

And you're supposed to be able to function as a normal person.

[music playing]

(CRYING) Somewhere in me is this little glimmer of hope.

I just want to be a normal person.

[panting]

You can't do it.

And then I just get mad.

If I don't make a change now, I'm

scared it's gonna be too late.

[groaning] This is hard.

I refuse to stop fighting.

I have to do this for my children.

I'm happy you asked me out.

Really?

Yeah.

Well, I'm happy you accepted.

[pensive music]

MELISSA: I have a hard time facing the reality of my life

because at my size, at my weight,

you purposely avoid everything that

brings your awareness to how you appear to other people.

And that's how I've tried to live for years.

But no matter how hard I try, I can't ignore it now.

Because when you get to my size, it's

like the world is on my shoulders and all over my body.

And it's just globs of fat just, like, flopping around.

Of course you're not supposed to be this way.

And you're supposed to be able to function as a normal person.

And I'm unable to function as a normal person because

of all this excess weight.

I need to plan every step and move I make,

or I might end up in a situation I can't get out of because I

just can't do too much at once.

And it makes me feel depressed, unwanted.

It makes me feel embarrassed.

It makes me anxiety ridden.

It makes me feel lesser than a person.

It's like I'm humanizing myself every day.

(CRYING) And it's miserable to live like this.

My life is miserable because of how big I've let myself

get because of my love of food.

My whole life revolves around food.

And I'm constantly thinking about it,

craving it, wanting it.

There's not a moment where I'm not hungry.

And I can't wait to eat because of the joy that it brings me.

Food makes me feel like I don't have to feel.

Food feels for me.

It fills you up from what you feel empty inside.

Food gives you that wholesome moment

that you're looking for in the day to feel like you matter.

It doesn't judge you.

It just helps you cope.

And you feel good.

It fulfills that high.

The only problem with food is the after effects.

As soon as I'm done eating, then it

goes back to scheduled programming

of feeling depressed and feeling unwanted--

everything you don't want to feel.

So I just keep eating and destroying

my life to where I'm not even living anymore

because I'm just too big.

When I was younger, I struggled with my weight.

But I just never imagined it would get this bad.

I was always a chunky child.

And I think that issue started with my mother.

My mother-- I would not say that she is the sole person

why I gained weight.

But I could say that she is the person who started it.

My mother fed me these large meals to make

up for the verbal abuse.

My mother was very verbally abusive in the things

that she would say.

You're stupid.

I wish I never had you.

I wish you were better.

I wish you were smaller.

And then in turn, dinner would, like, be a few hours later.

And she would make you this mass plate

because she's felt guilty for calling you stupid all day.

So you know, I took food as love from her.

And I wanted that.

I wanted to know she felt bad for the things

that she would say to me.

But my mother made me finish every morsel on that plate.

It could be the morsel of, like, in between my finger.

You better finish it.

Sometimes after I would eat the food,

you know, she would be, like, happy about it because it

brought her some sort of joy.

But if you're a child, you should not

be eating an adult sized meal.

But I learned eating is good.

And you know, it doesn't matter if you're

full if you have more food.

You just eat what's made for you.

It wasn't the same with my father

because there was no judgment of being overweight.

You know, I was his little girl.

And he just wanted me to be happy.

That was my go to person.

He was my best friend.

But when I turned eight years old,

my parents' relationship really took a turn for the worst,

became toxic.

And then my father decided to leave.

But losing my father like that devastated me because he

was out of my life so fast.

So it was hard for me.

And I know it was hard for my mother too.

That's when I started putting on a lot more weight.

I became extremely depressed for a while

and used food as a pick me up to make me happy.

And over that summer alone, my size more than doubled.

I started off at, like, 60 to 70 pounds.

And then by the end of that summer, I was 150 pounds.

All the weight gain slowed down when I went back to school.

And I wasn't eating as much, but I

was still finding ways to sneak food

and eat the way that I wanted.

And so I put on another 100 pounds in the next five years.

And I was around 250 when I was 13.

And when it got like that was when my mom started

to really point out my size.

My mother would constantly comment on my weight.

Like, she would say, you're fat.

You're a girl.

You're supposed to be attractive.

So that upset me more.

But I also tried to stop eating as much just

because I wanted all the things my mom was

saying to me to stop.

And so I lost some weight between the ages

of 13 to 15 years old.

And then something drastic happened.

When I got into high school, I started dating someone.

And when I was 15, I got pregnant.

I got pregnant and got an abortion.

My mother was the one who took me to have the abortion

because only my mother knew.

And she wasn't happy when I got myself into that situation.

But after my abortion and depression,

I felt a lot of regret.

And I felt guilt. So I went back to food to cope with the pain.

And I started getting bigger.

The food didn't make the depression I had go away.

And it got too overwhelming for me that I

didn't want to do anything.

And when I turned 16, I dropped out of high school.

And for the next couple of years my life

was just eating and sleeping.

And I hid.

I only had one person I really got close to

and who I considered a true friend.

And her name is Shay.

She would come over and check on me.

And she still does it to this day.

But she was the only one who did that then.

Other than seeing her and my mom,

I was alone, eating all the time.

Between 16 and 18 I gained another 100.

So I was close to being over 400.

But I didn't let my weight gain hold me back.

About four months into turning 18,

I ended up going back to school.

And over the summer, I finished barely and graduated.

And then I got a job and started to get back on track.

And when I was 22, I tried to go to college.

I did that, and I got a job to pay for all my bills.

And it went well at first, you know?

The first year was OK.

And then I lost my job.

I just fell deeper into depression

and started eating more.

And I decided to drop out.

So I was a college dropout at 23 and around 450 pounds.

So I got a job as a receptionist and got a place of my own.

And so for many years, all I did was go to work and eat.

I didn't do much because of my depression

that I was still dealing with.

And then it got worse because my dad died when I was 27.

Went through a very big depression.

And then I got sick from all the stress at the time.

I was over 500 pounds then.

And the weight was starting to get to me.

I ended up being very weak and tired.

And I was too tired to just keep going.

But one day, I passed out at work.

And that's when I knew my health was

getting to a really bad point.

But I still couldn't help myself when it came to food

because food filled that void.

So I needed it even though it was taking over my life

because I couldn't work anymore, and I

was getting worse every day.

That was amplified even more because at 35, I lost my mom.

And that sent me into another spiral (CRYING)

because she suddenly passed from kidney failure.

Because I was too big to go to her wake or her funeral,

so I had to miss that.

And it made me feel so ashamed that my weight kept me

from that.

But after losing my mom, I felt like I was alone.

The only person I have now is my friend Shay.

But I only see her when she's able to check in on me.

Other than that, I'm trapped in this apartment every day.

Hey, Melissa.

[inaudible].

Get everything?

Yeah, I got you some food.

MELISSA: When I have food, I have happiness.

So how do you give up happiness even though you

know it's killing you?

I know how I eat is killing me.

And if I don't change, I'm going to die.

And what scares me most about my life right now

is not waking up, not being able to live it,

not being able to accomplish goals

that I set forth for myself.

SHAY: I've known Melissa for over 20 something years.

Melissa is very bubbly, very intelligent person.

But she does have some struggles when it comes to self-esteem

issues and things of that such.

She used to go out.

She used to travel.

Now it's much different.

Even though she gained excessive weight now, she doesn't go out.

I don't want to share any of these,

but I'm going to be nice.

That's fine. You can have them.

You sure?

I'm positive.

MELISSA: I want to roller blade again.

I want to be able to have fun and make

jokes and not feel embarrassed to be around people.

When you're overweight, you don't

want to be around people because you

feel like they're judging you.

You just avoid everything.

I want to travel with my best friend.

I want to be able to go out and dance and have a good time

and make jokes and feel secure within myself.

I want to regain my confidence that I once had.

But I can't do any of that if I don't give up food because it's

keeping me from all of that.

My food addiction is killing me.

And if I don't make a change, the people

who do love me and appreciate me that are still here,

who count on me, won't have me.

And that's not fair.

(CRYING) It's not fair.

And I know life is not supposed to be fair.

But there are some things that are.

So I know I have to do something drastic

because I can't sit and continue to ignore

what I've done to myself.

It's either face the music or just

start planning your funeral.

And I don't want to die.

I'm going to be traveling to Houston

today to try to see Dr. Now.

I have an appointment with him tomorrow because I

want weight loss surgery.

But I'm willing to do this and go all that way if there's

any chance I could turn my life around

because I know I have to.

I'm gonna fly because I know I can't last in a car for days

to get there from Florida.

[doorbell rings]

Come in!

And my best friend Shay is coming with me to Houston

to meet Dr. Now as support and to help me

because I also know I want to be able to do this trip on my own.

Hi. - Hey.

Good morning.

Good morning.

I don't know why I booked this flight so early.

[laughs] Me either.

MELISSA: [laughs]

SHAY: How are you doing?

I'm just nervous.

Well, it's now or never, right?

Yep.

OK.

It's been a while since I've flown,

so I don't know what the travel is gonna be like.

I think that's what I'm really fearful of because when you're

this size, you just avoid everything because it's

just easier to do that.

All right.

There we go.

But this is a journey that I've been wanting to start

for a really long time.

I've been waiting for so long for a miracle.

And I just want change.

I just want to change.

And he could help me.

So I'm ready for the challenge.

But I'm thankful for the support that I

do have with Shay to do this.

And my friend Wendy is also driving us to the airport.

So I know I have people that are there for me.

And that helps me stepping out like I

am because I do not like going out in public ever really.

I know I have to do this because the way I've lived my life

has to change.

Or I know I won't be here much longer.

And I'm not ready to give up and wait for that.

So I'm gonna fight to try to change that.

I just hope my worst fears of how bad this could go

are wrong.

And I'm not trying to push myself

to a place I'm not ready.

I'm gonna pray for you.

Thank you.

Let me know how it goes.

[interposing voices]

Love you too.

If I don't make the whole trip, the worst part would be me not

getting the help that I need.

And if that happens, my life is basically over.

So I desperately need to do this because I'm

running out of time.

So no matter what it takes, I have to make it there.

Me and Shay made it to Houston last night.

The trip wasn't as bad as I was worried it would be.

But it was still a lot of activity for me, a lot more

than I've had in a really long time.

So I'm sore.

And it's a little harder for me to move today because of that.

But overall, I feel good.

And I'm ready to meet Doctor Now and get his help.

I'm just nervous because there's always

a chance he could say he can't help me for whatever reason.

And if that happens, it will be tragic.

So I'm just praying it all goes well.

Melissa?

MELISSA: This is the first step for me getting my life back.

It's been years since I've been on a scale.

So I'm worried about where my weight is at today.

Seeing that number come up is not very easy.

And it only gets harder the bigger it gets.

That's not as bad as I was afraid it could be.

But it's still way too high.

And I need to get it to drop.

And I'm hoping Doctor Now will be

able to help me do that because I'm tired of being this size

and having this life.

I'm ready for it to change.

And I need it to change now.

Hello.

How are y'all doing?

MELISSA: Good.

How are you?

DR. NOWZARADAN: I'm good.

Thank you.

All right.

I'm Dr. Nowzaradan.

You must be Melissa.

Yes.

And this young lady--

This is my best friend Shay.

Nice to meet you both.

You as well.

So Melissa, your weight is at 592 pounds.

So you're here to get help with that?

Yes.

DR. NOWZARADAN: That's good because looking

at your weight and height, your BMI is 115, which is very high.

It's one of the highest we have seen.

So the weight you have on you being under five feet tall,

if you have average height, you'll be at 200 pounds.

So this is a lot of weight on your system--

your heart, your lung, and nervous system.

And on top of that, most of your weight is in mid portion.

It's going to compromise your breathing

and compromise your circulation.

And anything can happen to you.

Even something like a cold, there's a good chance

you won't make it.

You know what?

Your life expectancy for people in your category

is not even 50 years old.

So that's very dangerous situation you have.

You know what a normal weight for you is?

90 pounds.

Not even 100 pounds.

And you're almost six times that.

So how long will it be before your heart and lungs

and your joints and every organ in your body gonna give away?

Won't be too long.

So you need to lose weight now to stop that.

This is why I'm here.

You're here because you need some help, right?

Yes.

So what are you willing to do?

Change for the better, eat healthier, to cut out the soda.

Just to live better.

Well, you haven't done that for 36 years.

And you knew there was doing something

wrong eating those things.

But you didn't change.

What is different now?

(CRYING) I don't have my parents to--

I don't have my parents to have that cushion.

And I want to proceed with my life.

And I just want to be able to accomplish

goals that I didn't get to.

And I'm still young enough to do it.

I want to do it.

OK.

If you're ready to make a change, we can help you.

But we're gonna give you some roadmap that you're

gonna have to follow.

But there's not gonna be anything I

can do to make you lose weight.

It's gonna be you that you're gonna have to make the changes.

You think you're ready to make the changes?

MELISSA: If I have your help, yes.

OK you will have my help, but I

can't make the choices for you.

So at the end of the day, you need to understand

this is mostly up to you.

We just give you guidance and some tools.

I'm gonna give you dietary education for you

that I want you to read every night to understand

what's going on with it.

Follow that.

And it will break down.

It's 1,200 calories a day.

That's going to be focused on protein.

Zero carb.

Zero carbs. OK.

DR. NOWZARADAN: Zero carbs.

OK?

You're gonna eat with the protein and vegetable.

OK?

Yes.

DR. NOWZARADAN: And if you follow that,

then you're gonna be easily able to lose

60 pounds in two months.

And if you do that, then we'll consider

you for weight loss surgery.

OK.

DR. NOWZARADAN: OK?

But right now, it's not gonna be safe for you to have a surgery

this way that you are.

So you're gonna have to lose some weight

to change that before surgery is even an option for you

and understand that your health and your life

is more important than food.

MELISSA: OK.

OK?

I also want you to improve your stamina.

So I'm gonna give you exercise to do too.

I want you to do those exercises an hour in the morning,

an hour in the afternoon.

OK.

And if you do all that in two months,

you should be in a lot better place with your health.

OK?

OK.

But you're eating because of food comfort.

Oh, yeah.

That need to be addressed.

So psychotherapy is going to be another step we need to take

for you to be successful in the long term

to work on those issues, see what is driving you to eat,

and what is it driving you to have food comfort.

OK?

One bad day is gonna look much better if you eat too much.

And so you feel better after you eat too much.

But then after that, you feel bad because you ate too much.

Exactly.

OK.

So this vicious circle is gonna have to break.

So we'll get you some psychotherapy

to help you with that.

Then if you do the surgery, you will

need to move to Houston to do the program since Florida

is far to travel from.

OK.

But the first step is you showing

me you're ready to do this by losing 60 pounds in two months.

So everything is gonna be up to you from this point on.

OK?

OK.

All right.

Well, nice to meet you.

SHAY: You as well.

DR. NOWZARADAN: And we'll see you again.

OK?

OK.

Thank you.

Have a good day.

You too. Bye.

BOTH: Bye.

MELISSA: [sighs]

DR. NOWZARADAN: Hopefully Melissa

means it when she says she realizes

the danger of her situation and that's ready to change because

for her height, she has an exceptional amount

of weight on her that's putting a great deal of strain

on her whole body.

So she has to lose a lot of weight fast.

And if she doesn't start that over the next two months,

we may need to consider more extreme options to intervene

before something happens to start the domino effect

of her body shutting down.

Because once she gets to that point, there won't be very much

we can do to bring her back.

So it's very important that she starts

to make the changes she needs right now

before it's too late for her.

MELISSA: I feel good about my appointment in a weird way

because even though Dr. Now said some really hard things for me

to hear, I know it's the truth and what

I need someone to tell me.

Because I know he's right.

And I'm not gonna make it much longer if I don't do something.

So I'm not gonna let anything be an excuse

for me not to do this.

I'm gonna give this all that I got because this

is do or die for me.

Either I follow his plan, or my heart or something

will give out soon.

And that will be it for me.

So I have to make sure that doesn't happen.

It's been about a month since I've seen Dr. Now

for my first appointment where he gave

me his diet and exercise plan.

And I've been doing it religiously like he told me.

I'm just doing everything that I'm supposed to be doing.

I'm not cheating on any of it.

And I'm doing all these exercises and everything

in the diet plan.

So my days look a lot different now

than they did just a month ago.

You know, I'm much more active because Dr.

Now advised that I should exercise at least twice a day.

And those exercises involve my upper and lower body.

So I do these band stretch exercises for my upper body

in the morning.

And that alone took a lot out of me at first.

I got really sore after the first day.

But I can do them better now.

And I can do about double the reps now.

So it's getting better slowly but surely.

And I've been expanding those exercises by looking online.

And I just picked out some videos

that I could just do on the fly, like, hey, let me,

you know, do this 10 minute interval of exercise

to add to what I do for my upper body stuff.

So I've made progress there.

And I've also made progress with my overall stamina

and how I could get around because I'm walking

the amount that I need in the morning

and then again in the evening.

And I try to incorporate that exercising in my day

or getting up to clean or going to get the mail.

And usually I would wait for Shay to do that.

And in general, I would go to my mailbox

once a month because it's not only hard for me to do,

but I don't like going outside at all.

But I've been trying to venture out

more just to get used to walking out more, you know,

trying to explore more.

And I know just going to the mailbox doesn't seem a lot,

but it's a lot for me.

But now I make it my business to at least go

every day or every other day.

So I'm a lot more active now.

And I'm doing more than I would normally do.

And after a month of it, I do feel a lot better.

I still have to stop and take my breaks.

I have to be careful and not push myself too hard.

But the breaks that I have to take are shorter.

So I see progress with that too.

And before I started this journey,

I did not like working out.

But now when I'm done, I'm happy I did it because I feel good.

And the more that I do it is something

that I'm becoming more OK with.

So overall, I know I'm doing a lot better.

And I'm excited about that.

But cutting back on food has probably

been the hardest part, a lot harder than the exercises.

You know?

But Dr. Now called me out on eating bad foods,

eating carbohydrates that are not,

you know, appropriate for your body, you know,

and taking more protein.

You know, don't snack.

Eat small.

You know, if you're not hungry, don't eat.

The biggest thing.

And I'm so used to ordering something

whenever I get hungry.

And I'll eat it really quickly.

And I get full, but I still want more.

So I'll get more just whenever I want it.

But now I have to actually eat at the appropriate times.

And no more big meals.

You know, I gave up my big breakfast

and my late night eating.

But my biggest issue is giving up soda

because soda's like my coffee.

It's like, it keeps you up.

It's sugary, so you're like--

and then all of a sudden, it's just like you're down.

So that's been the hardest for me to give up.

But I've done it.

And I'm only sticking to water now.

So this has been a really big adjustment for me.

And I'm working really hard.

I have tripped up a couple of times.

The best advice that Dr. Now did advise

is that you're gonna have bad days.

You're gonna have good days.

But it's all about how you start off tomorrow.

So the times I've slipped, I've just corrected the course

and got back to doing what I need.

And my mindset right now is to do the best

that I can do every day.

And you know, my hope is that it's all enough,

and I make it to the goal that I need by next month

when I go back to Dr. Now because I'm committed to this,

and I'm trying to do it to the best of my ability.

And I know this is my last chance to get help.

I have to save my life.

So I'm pushing myself hard to get it.

And I just need it to be enough.

I'm back in Houston to see Dr. Now again.

And I'm really nervous to get back on the scale

because it's gonna be an important weight check for me

since I need to hit a weight loss goal today

if I'm going to move ahead.

So all the hard work that I've put in the past couple

of months comes down to right now to see what progress I've

made and to see if it's enough.

And I'm really hoping that it is because I know the chance I

need to get to a better place and to have a better life all

depends on what Dr. Now tells me and whether he approves

me for weight loss surgery.

Melissa?

MELISSA: And I'm gonna know what that answer is when that number

comes up on the scale because either it will be enough

for me to get it, or it won't.

So I just need it to be enough because everything

depends on this.

I'm at Dr. Now's for my second appointment

to see if I made it to my goal to get weight loss surgery.

I've worked really hard.

So I'm expecting to see good results.

But I'm still nervous to find out what I've lost.

Dr. Now told me to lose 60 pounds

over the last two months.

So that means I need to have at least gone from 592 to 532

by today.

NURSE: 548.

Really?

NURSE: Yes, ma'am.

[laughs] That's a lot, but it's still not enough.

I know I worked hard.

So it's disappointing not to see more of a result right now.

And I don't know what Dr. Now is gonna

say about where I'm at today.

Hello.

How are you doing?

Good.

How are you?

I'm doing good.

OK, Melissa.

In two months, you managed to lose 44 pounds.

Yes.

So that's almost 20 pounds short of what the goal was.

I know.

So what happened?

I'm not sure.

I worked really hard.

Well, not exactly.

You worked hard to lose 40 pounds,

but not as hard as you should have.

Because if you did the diet, you would have easily

lost close to 100 pounds.

So did you do the diet?

Not every day.

There were times where I tripped up

and ate stuff I shouldn't have.

So why are you lying to yourself

about how hard you worked and trying to lie to me about it?

I don't know.

I thought I worked really hard, but I guess

I should have worked harder.

I'm glad to see that you're being honest with yourself

about that.

So that's positive.

And losing 44 pounds is also a positive achievement.

So you're showing me you're willing to take the first step.

But I still need to see a little bit more from you

if you want to show me you're ready for weight loss surgery.

MELISSA: I'll try harder.

I'm willing to make the change.

OK.

I give you two more months to lose another 40 pounds.

OK.

You think you can do that?

Yes, definitely.

DR. NOWZARADAN: OK.

Good.

But the other thing I want you to do

is go to psychotherapy and start that.

I think you're ready to start working on some

of what's driving you to eat.

So we'll start with that.

You think this is something you're willing to do?

100%.

I could definitely do that.

OK.

Great.

And then we'll set that up for you.

Then I'll see you in two months.

OK?

If you need anything before then, let me know.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

I'll see you soon.

Even though should have lost some weight over the last two

months, I am at least happy to seeing her progress from that

to show me she's trying to make the positive changes she

needs to get healthy and improve her health.

So if she at least maintains that over the next two months,

that will show me she's starting to take a bigger step

and get weight loss surgery.

And since she taken the decent first step

to show me some commitment, we will go ahead and start her

going to psychotherapy to see if she can work on some of what

drives her to use food to cope.

And hopefully that helps her continue

in the direction she's going.

Because if she doesn't maintain the level of progress

she just made, she will show me that her commitment

was only short term.

And that's something that she was serious about.

And we won't be moving ahead and doing her weight loss surgery.

But hopefully she stays on track and does what she needs.

MELISSA: That could have gone a lot worse.

So I'm relieved it didn't.

And I think Dr. Now's next goal is fair.

You know?

I could have done better this time.

Even though I worked hard, I know

there's room for improvement.

So he's right about that.

And I'll go and try harder and do what I need.

Whatever it takes.

I'm back in Florida.

And I'm about to do a video session with Dr. Paradise

to do my first therapy appointment.

And I feel like I'm ready for it.

But my hope is that the session helps

me move in the right direction and hopefully get

closer to where I need to be.

[video call music]

Hi, Melissa.

Hi, Dr. Paradise.

I'm glad we're able to connect.

Tell me how you're doing today?

I'm doing OK.

Doing OK.

Going through the motions of everything.

DR. PARADISE: So how long did it take you to get this big?

I would approximately say--

I went into a really deep depression

about three years ago.

I lost my mother in September of 2019.

And that corresponded exactly with your weight gain.

Oh, extremely.

Like, you know, binge eating and definitely

not acknowledging other circumstances of how to cope.

Wow.

How did that affect you?

It kind of seems surreal, like, she hasn't left.

And I know (CRYING) you're supposed

to let go at some point.

But it's like, I know they wouldn't let go of me

if it was me on the other end.

What are the parts you're hanging on to that you

need to let go of?

Not feeling good enough.

Your mom's unmet expectations.

You haven't let go of those.

No, nor my father's.

DR. PARADISE: Your mom's disappointment.

You haven't let go of that.

No.

DR. PARADISE: That's something to work on, right?

I think you can let go of their unmet expectations.

You can let go of their disappointment.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And prior before that, me losing my job and me

going through a breakup with my ex definitely

took a bigger toll than I expected

because I thought I would just bounce right back into life.

And that didn't happen.

And I started isolating myself more,

and I started being less sociable

and not willing to participate actively in my own life.

There's good news in what you just said.

OK.

[laughs]

The good news is you know that when you socially

isolate and keep to yourself and act depressed, you gain weight.

Exactly.

Of course.

And so what that means is if you don't socially isolate,

you're likely to lose weight.

Melissa, if you lost weight, would

your relationships improve?

Yeah, because a lot of my friends

were just upset that the fact that I decided

to retract myself and isolate myself because they found

it to be really unhealthy.

And they thought it was like, oh, this will--

it's like a phase.

It'll pass.

But it hasn't passed yet.

No.

[laughs]

I want you to make friends with how you look.

You're so engaging and articulate and smart.

It's a shame that you're not around other people.

You know?

I mean, you have so much to offer.

Friends, maybe future boyfriends.

You're wasting yourself.

I kind of want you to get dressed up

and go out and do something.

[laughs] [sniffs] Oh.

Melissa, it's been so good to talk to you.

I'm really glad we got to connect.

Yes.

I'm really proud of you for letting all this out.

You're a great talker.

And have a good night, OK?

Take care.

Bye.

Oh, wow.

That's a lot.

I feel emotionally tired and drained but good because

of what I was able to get out.

But I know doing what Dr. Paradise wants me to do

is gonna be tough.

It's not gonna be easy for me to put

myself out there and go out more because that makes me nervous.

But I'm gonna try because I'll do whatever it

takes to keep moving forward.

Everything depends on that.

You know, if I fail, then I lose everything that I'm

desperately fighting to have.

So no matter what I have to face, I'm gonna do it.

For the past week, I've been working on getting to where

I feel like I am mentally and emotionally ready to try to go

out and be in public more.

It's a big step for me.

I don't like putting myself out there.

But I'm working on it.

And I started going to the pool in my apartment complex

to do my exercises to kind of try

and start the process of being around people.

I'm going in the morning, so not a lot of people go to the pool

then.

But some do.

So this is a start with me being OK around people more.

You know, it gets me out a little bit,

but it's still close to my home.

And in a smaller area, I don't have

to worry about being around a whole bunch

of people all of a sudden.

So it may be a baby step, but it's

still a step and a forward motion in the right direction.

And that's what counts.

But doing this and being in the pool

has helped me with my exercises.

So that's a bit of a bonus too.

It's a lot easier to move around and do more in a pool.

So I've really enjoyed that part of how

it helps me because I'm pushing myself

to be more and more active.

And it puts a lot of strain on places like my back,

my knees, and all that.

So having that alleviated a little has felt really good.

So I've really been enjoying it.

And overall, it hasn't been too overwhelming for me.

I still struggle with not wanting anyone to see me.

But I do feel like I'm getting a little better with it.

And maybe soon, I'll feel like I'm ready to do something more.

But I'm not there yet.

I've been able to do all the stuff

that Dr. Paradise said about getting ready for the day

and looking at myself in the mirror

instead of avoiding that.

And while I do it, I'm working on realizing

my worth and my value because I'm not any less of a person

because of the size that I am.

I'm back in Houston on my own this time to see Dr.

Now for my third appointment.

Shay couldn't make it.

But with all the progress that I feel like I'm making,

I told her that I was ready to do this trip on my own.

So I did.

And I'm here now.

And I'm just as nervous this time as I was the last time

because of how important this weigh in

is gonna be since I need to have hit another goal.

But this time, I didn't have to lose as much as my first goal.

Melissa?

MELISSA: Dr. Now wanted me to lose at least 40 pounds

over the past two months.

I was at 548 last time.

So that means I need to be at or under 508 today.

507.

[laughs] OK.

I did it.

Barely, I guess.

But I did it.

So I'm feeling excited because this should mean

I'm getting approved and getting closer to everything

that I want and that I'm working hard to get to.

So I'm just really happy and looking forward

to how this appointment is going to go because I think

it's gonna go well for me.

Hello.

How you doing?

MELISSA: Good.

How are you?

DR. NOWZARADAN: All right.

That's good to hear.

So did you have a good trip this time?

Yes, I did.

It feels like it's getting easier.

Well, probably it is because of the weight you lost.

You lost 85 pounds as of today.

So that's very positive.

And I'm proud of you for that.

Thank you.

So I'm gonna go ahead and approve

you for weight loss surgery.

MELISSA: Really?

Are you serious?

[laughs] Thank you so much.

Very excited.

Good.

So I'm gonna schedule you for a month

so you can move down here to Houston.

And then just stay on track, because when you show up

for surgery and your practice has slowed down

a lot or worse, than I'll cancel the surgery

and we won't move ahead.

You understand that?

Yes.

But I need to talk to you about moving.

My support system, my family, and my friends

are back in Florida.

So I don't know how I'd be able to leave and come

here for a long period of time.

DR. NOWZARADAN: The problem is the same environment that got

you to be 600 pounds is there.

So I'm not sure what kind of support

you're looking for in Florida.

But it doesn't seem like you have it.

And the other issue is if you start to gain again,

it's more difficult for us to intervene when you're not here.

I guess.

I told you, to do my program, it means you need to be

in Texas because Florida is too far to travel back and forth

every time with all the [inaudible]

you have in your body still.

So we can provide you with functional support that

will monitor your progress and help

you to do this for the long term if you're here.

MELISSA: Is there any other way?

The only other way is for you to get down

to a healthier weight to continue to travel and show me

you're gonna stick with it no matter what.

And you need to lose another 100 pounds to do that.

You think you can do that?

I'm willing to try.

So if I give you three months to lose 100 pounds,

and you do that, and we do weight loss surgery on you,

would you agree to move here if you start

to slip afterward at any point?

Yes, I could do that.

OK.

Then lose 100 pounds more over the next three months,

which basically is the same amount

per month as previous goals.

And if you do that, then we'll see what we can do.

OK.

I'll do that.

All right.

Then I'll see you in three months.

Have a safe trip back.

And if you need anything, give me a call.

Thank you so much.

DR. NOWZARADAN: Take care. - Take care.

Have a great day.

You too.

I'm happy to see that Melissa has stayed

on track with her weight loss.

And so far, she is as committed as she says she is.

The question now is if she can keep

going over the next few months to show me that it's

a possibility she can do this from her old environment

and away from the support system we have here.

I have concerns about her doing that.

But if she's able to hit the goal

I gave her to lose another 100 pounds on her own,

then I will consider it.

So see what progress she makes at the next appointment

and how she's doing.

Then go from there.

But if she doesn't do that and still refuses to move,

then we won't be moving ahead with her.

MELISSA: I'm excited because I got approved.

And Dr. Now is giving me the chance to get the surgery

and not move.

But the goal that he gave me to do it is a little overwhelming.

And the more that it sinks in, the more I think

I was crazy to agree.

But it's what I want.

So I'm gonna go back and work just as hard as I have been so

that when I come back, I'll be down another 100 pounds

so I could get the surgery and stay where I'm

around family and friends and the support

that I have with them.

Because I know I can do this.

I just have to prove it to Dr. Now.

So that's what I'm gonna do.

I've been working hard for the past month

to keep moving forward until I lose what I need.

So I'm sticking to my diet and exercising more than ever.

And I'm also working on my emotional and mental stuff

I need.

I had another session with Dr. Paradise.

And he wanted me to make sure that I

start going out in public more like we

discussed the first time.

I told him I've been going to the pool

and taking some baby steps towards that.

But he says it's time that I start doing more.

So I figured I'd try to do my own grocery shopping today.

That's gonna involve a lot of things outside

of my comfort zone like being around a lot of people

and getting in a car, which is hard for me at my size.

Shay would usually help with that,

or I would just have it delivered.

But I'm gonna try to do it myself

today to get what I need to keep making healthy meals.

But this is a big step for me.

I really don't like being out and doing stuff that involves

being around food and in public because I

feel like that's where I'm being judged the most.

But I know I need to take a step like this

to keep moving forward.

So I am.

It's just probably the hardest thing I've done

yet, as weird as it sounds.

I feel like I'm on display, and I hate that feeling.

Shay told me she would be with me if it got too overwhelming,

and I could just call her if I needed her.

But it's important for me to be able to do this on my own.

But it helps knowing that I have somebody

like her who's there for me.

She's been pushing me to do this for years

and even tries to get me to meet people,

people she thinks that would be good to have in my life.

But I've always made excuses to avoid it just

to stay home because I just didn't

want to have to deal with it.

But I'm not doing that anymore.

Trying to eat healthy isn't the easiest thing either.

Like, everything has a lot of sugars or carbs or salts.

It's just a lot of stuff that I'm not supposed to have.

So it's a learning process.

But I hopefully will get the hang of it

and know what's what the more that I do it because like Dr.

Now says, this has to be a lifestyle change.

And eating like this needs to be my new normal.

And I'm trying to make that adjustment.

It's just not that easy.

I think I'm ready to go back home.

I got a lot of what I need, you know?

I've been out in public around people

for a good amount of time.

So that's enough for today.

But I feel really good about it and how I did.

Thank you.

Have a great day.

It's not like I was worried about freaking out,

but my anxiety gets really high when I do stuff like this.

And I've gotten used to hiding from the world.

And I know it's gonna be a process to change that.

But as long as I'm moving forward and making progress,

I'm good.

And I feel like I'm doing that.

But I know I have a long way to go to get

to my next goal for Dr. Now.

So I'm keeping at it because I'm determined to do this.

And I'll keep doing my best to make all the steps that I

need to get to where I want.

Today I'm going to try to take another big step for me.

I'm focusing on dealing with the stuff behind my eating.

And after another appointment with Dr. Paradise,

we talked about how I need to deal with some

of the things that have happened to me from my past,

particularly how I keep that stuff inside

and don't talk about it.

So today, I asked Shay to come over for lunch.

And I'm gonna to tell her about a boyfriend who

crossed some major boundaries when I was younger.

[doorbell rings]

Come in.

Hey, Melissa.

MELISSA: Hey.

- How you doing? - Good.

I have my hands full.

I'm sorry.

That's OK.

OK.

Smells good.

It's smells good?

[laughs]

MELISSA: After I was violated, I didn't tell anyone.

Things I kept to myself and never even told the people

who were close to me.

So what Dr. Paradise thinks what I need to do

is start the process of letting things like that out

so I can have a chance to deal with them

instead of suppressing them and using things like food

to try to forget them.

So I'm gonna try to do that today with Shay.

But it's not easy.

All right.

Let's do a taste test before we eat.

[laughs] It's good?

Are we sitting at the table?

Yeah.

Want to stand and eat?

How rude of me.

We gonna go sit at the table.

MELISSA: I'm not gonna worry about what

she's gonna think or say.

That's not the issue for me.

It's just I don't want to feel what

I do when I think about that stuff and talk about it.

I've avoided it for so long.

But I know that's part of why I've had issues.

And that's what I'm trying to change.

And that's why I'm doing this.

It's not bad.

You like it?

It's edible for me.

The blackened seasoning is really--

Mm-hmm.

So you're doing pretty good, huh?

I'm trying.

You could do it.

It'll get easier.

Just don't give up, you know?

MELISSA: Yeah.

Dr. Paradise wanted me to do some homework about opening

up and being more open to trusting again, which is really

difficult [laughs] because when you're hurt, you know,

you don't want to be hurt anymore.

In-- [sighs] when I was younger, I dated a guy.

And [sighs] you know, he--

you know, he crossed a boundary that

made me feel uncomfortable.

And I just don't ever want to be in a situation like that

ever again.

[sighs]

Doing everything that Dr. Paradise says to do,

I need to, you know, go back into the world.

I need to you know, have those important relationships.

But I do need to set those boundaries not only with just

that ex, because of that ex, but because of friendship

and all those other things.

Like, I need to be more back in the world.

I need to interact with people.

I need to [sighs] make sure that I'm making better choices

but in being selective of who I'm friends with

and not let them cross those boundaries.

I have to set them for that purpose,

to be able to process things and to not only cope with food.

Just simple fact that you are acknowledging

what it is that you need to change in your life

is a big step.

If you remember what you coming from,

you will enter into where you're going.

It's going to be hard.

But you have to push yourself because you know what

it is that you're trying to do.

And you can do it.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

MELISSA: I'm not sure if I feel better or not.

Appreciate it.

I'm just not sure how I feel or if that made anything better.

Opening up to Shay felt really emotional, but in a good way,

like, a release.

But I'm glad I did it because I know it shows progress.

Whether it helps me a lot or not,

I'm willing to face whatever I need

just to give me a chance to change for the better

and get healthy.

I'm back in Houston again.

And I think I'm more nervous than I've been this whole time.

I'm not sure why I'm more nervous than last time

because I got approved.

Melissa?

MELISSA: I guess I just know a lot still depends

on my weigh in this time and whether I'm

going to be able to get the surgery and stay in Florida

or not.

And as I thought about it, I know

there's a risk that Dr. Now may even take away

the option of getting surgery altogether

if he's not happy with my progress

this time depending on where my weight's at.

So I know I took a gamble doing this--

a big gamble.

And I'm just really hoping it pays off

and doesn't blow up in my face.

I'm back at Dr. Now's to try to prove

to him that I could still do what I need

and stay on track in Florida.

But to do that, Dr. Now said I needed to lose 100 pounds

over the last three months.

So that means I need to be under 407 today, which is a big drop.

But I've worked really hard to get there.

And so I'm hoping to see the progress I need.

That's kind of disappointing.

I thought I did a lot better than that.

But I'm at least losing a good amount of weight

like the last times.

I just don't think it's gonna be good enough for Dr. Now to let

me move ahead without moving.

So I'm just worried about what my options are gonna

be because I need the surgery.

But my life and all my support is in Florida.

So how do I choose between that?

It just feels like an impossible choice.

[knocking]

Hi, Melissa.

How you doing?

Well, that depends on what you think about my progress.

Well, OK.

I'm glad to see that you're still losing.

But it's only a fraction now of what

you were supposed to show me that you

can do this in Florida.

So what happened?

MELISSA: I don't know.

I thought I was more on track because I've

been working really hard.

OK.

You want me to tell you what happened?

OK.

When you make a drastic change in your eating habits

and go from something like 10,000 to 15,000 calories a day

to under 2,000, you're going to drop a lot of weight

very quickly even if you should take in some extra calories

here and there because you still have a large reduction

in what you're eating.

So the easiest point with weight loss like this

is at the beginning.

But after that, it not only is harder to maintain the changes

in your eating habit, but every calorie start to count

more the more weight you lose.

Because the difference between the amount of calories

that push you to where your body is storing fat versus burning

fat lessens as you lose.

You understand?

Yes.

OK.

So to be able to stand back for the long term,

you need the proper tools and support to do that.

And that's why you have to be here in Houston

because we can't provide that and monitor

you if you're not here.

You understand that?

Yes, I do.

But I still believe I could do this back home because I'm

still losing a good amount.

DR. NOWZARADAN: Melissa, you lost less

in the last three months than you did in the two months

before it.

So you're losing around 20 pounds a month before,

and now you're losing around 12 to 13 pounds a month.

So your weight loss is slowing like I told you it would.

So you may think you can do this how you want,

but that's not reality.

And unless you show me you can lose a lot more on your own,

then your choice is to move here to do

the program if you want to move ahead with weight loss surgery.

MELISSA: I could do better.

Could I have one more chance to hit

your goal to prove it to you?

Please, Dr. Now.

DR. NOWZARADAN: It's your choice.

If you want to try to lose the other 62 pounds you should

have by today, then go ahead.

But if you're stuck in it, then you will no longer be approved

for weight loss surgery.

So you can try it your way if you want and see what happens.

But other thing is it a good idea?

MELISSA: I understand what you're saying,

but it's really important to me that I stay in Florida.

So I want to try again.

DR. NOWZARADAN: All right.

Then I'll give you two months to lose another 60 pounds

if you want to consider that.

But I think the likelihood is that your weight loss will

have slowed even more by then.

MELISSA: I won't let that happen, Dr. Now.

DR. NOWZARADAN: I hope so.

Make sure to keep working on your emotional issues

because that's gonna be an important factor

for maintaining things if you're gonna do this.

OK?

Yes, sir.

DR. NOWZARADAN: All right, Melissa.

Have a safe trip back.

And you take care and stick with the healthy eating habit

and try to lose more weight.

And if you need anything, you may call.

Otherwise, I'll see you in two months.

OK.

I will.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

Bye.

Bye-bye.

I'm glad Melissa has continued to lose weight

over the last few months.

But I'm concerned about where she's

headed right now because she doesn't really understand

the challenges she's facing with how she wants to do

things to stay in Florida.

She's done very well up to this point.

But her weight loss slowing should be enough to show her

that it's not as easy as she thinks

to stay on track without the tools

and support to do that over the long term.

But she seems determined to try to show

me she can do it her way.

But it's easy to have discipline for a short period of time.

Maintaining it is the hard part.

But we'll see how she does over the next couple of months.

If she's able to hit the goal, I will

consider weight loss surgery for her without moving here.

But I don't think that's likely.

I think what likely is that her weight

loss will slow even more.

And if that happens, then her only option

will be to move here or not take weight loss surgery

because there will be no point doing it if she's

going to fail in the long run.

MELISSA: I'm really disappointed.

I was so far off from the goal and where I thought I was.

I really thought I was doing even

better this time than before.

So it was a surprise to me to see how little I lost

compared to the other times.

But I don't know why that is because I think I worked

hard in every way that I could.

So I'm just gonna have to go back and push myself

even harder because I know I can make

the progress I need back home.

I'm lucky that Dr. Now is giving me another chance.

And no matter what it takes for me, I'm gonna do it this time.

It's been about a month since my last appointment with Dr. Now.

And I've been working as hard as I can since then

to make my best progress yet to make sure I hit

my goal by my next appointment.

You know, I'm doing good with my diet.

I'm not snacking and only eating three healthy meals a day.

I have my ups and downs with it.

But I hardly let that get the best of me.

So I feel good about my food choices and my eating

and all that.

And I'm exercising every day.

I'm walking.

I'm swimming.

I'm doing all the upper body stuff.

And then I'm also working on the stuff

that Dr. Paradise has been telling me

to do for my emotional issues.

And I think I'm doing good with all of that too because not

only am I going out in public [inaudible],,

but today, I'm going out with someone.

Shay's been trying to introduce me to more people

to help me get more social.

And I've been texting and talking to one guy,

Elijah, who she gave my number to.

And today, we're going out.

So this is another big step for me.

But I'm actually excited about being out today

because I'm feeling really good.

So that makes me think I'm making some progress

because I don't think that would have been

the case for me a year ago.

I would have just avoided this whole scenario.

But that's not me anymore.

As Elijah and me got to know each other better talking

and texting, I was very upfront about my situation

and my weight--

What's up?

Hi.

Nice to meet you--

and what I'm trying to do to get healthy

and to get my life together.

And I told him how I'm trying to find ways to push myself

to do more with my exercises.

And I also mentioned I don't know if I could afford a gym.

And he told me about the workout machines

that they have at the park and that he would

be happy to show me that area so I could start

working out there for free.

And then we could walk around the park

and get to know each other a little more.

And I told him I loved that.

Stand up for, like, two seconds.

I'll count to five.

OK.

So this is kind of a date.

Maybe?

I'm not sure.

But it doesn't matter to me.

I'm just glad to be where I'm at and to start

expanding my world some by getting

out and meeting new people.

Elijah definitely took me out of my comfort zone.

I don't normally walk around the park

or ever would consider those stairs

or even swinging my feet because my feet are large

and so are my legs.

And that's kind of, like, embarrassing to show.

[squeals] Woo, we got a bad slip.

[laughs]

MELISSA: You know, all this is light years beyond where

I just was in my life.

So I'm feeling really good.

And I'm getting excited about my future and the possibilities

that I'm starting to see for me.

But I know it all still depends on me getting to the goal I

need by next month so I can stay here

and move forward like I want.

So I'm fighting my hardest to make sure I do that.

Getting out and seeing how I'm growing and expanding my life

is helping motivate me to work my hardest

to get the life I want.

I just really hope when I go back to see Dr. Now

and I get on the scale that I'm where I'm supposed to be.

Because if I have to choose between moving

away and getting surgery, I'm not sure what I'm gonna do.

I'm back in Houston again for my next appointment.

And I'm more nervous than ever.

It just feels like so much is riding on what happens today.

But I went back home after the last time

and did the best that I could.

You know?

I feel like I worked even harder this time than all the times

before.

Melissa?

MELISSA: So I'm just hoping when the number comes up today

that it's what I need to give Dr. Now the evidence he wants

to be convinced and to believe that I mean it

when I say I know I could do what I need and stay on course

without being here.

I mean it with every fiber of my being.

But I guess it's all just gonna come down

to what comes up on the scale.

So I just really hope it's enough.

I'm at Dr. Now's to see if I made it to the goal

that he gave me to get weight loss surgery

and to stay in Florida.

And to do that, he wanted me to lose 60 pounds from my last

weigh in where I was for 469.

So if I made it, I'll be down to at least 409.

That's really upsetting.

I don't know what to think because I don't understand why

my weight loss is less now when I'm working so hard

and doing so much to make all the progress that I can.

I want this so bad, and I'm putting in so much.

And it just doesn't make sense to me.

So I'm upset because I don't know what happened.

Hi, Melissa.

How are you?

MELISSA: It depends on what you're gonna tell me.

DR. NOWZARADAN: OK.

Well, I'm glad to see you're still losing some weight.

But your progress has slowed down even more this time, which

is what I was worried about.

So that's not good.

MELISSA: But I'm working as hard as I can, way more than you

know.

I explained it to you the last time.

But you seem to think you're the exception to the rule.

MELISSA: I don't think that.

I just know how hard I'm trying.

So I don't get why I'm doing worse.

You need to have the proper tools and support, like I have

been telling you, if you want to be able to do

this for the long term.

And the only way for you to get that

is if you are down here until you get

to a healthy enough place physically

and emotionally to do this on your own.

So you can either do that and stay in Houston for as long

as you need, or surgery won't be an option for you.

OK.

I definitely want to keep trying to get

down to the goal you gave me to show you

I could do this, Dr. Now.

Please.

What makes you think this pattern with your weight

loss slowing won't continue?

MELISSA: Because I know I can do it.

You know, Melissa, your current weight loss per month

isn't actually that bad.

You lost about 14 to 15 pounds a month this time.

So it's right around what I expect to be

if you had weight loss surgery.

But my concern is this trend is gonna continue.

And the next step is that your weight loss is gonna turn

into half of what you just did.

Then after that, it will stop.

And then in four months or so, you

will start the process of gaining all your weight back.

So at this point, your option is to either move here

to Houston so we can move ahead with you before you let all

that happen.

Or there's nothing more we can do for you

if you want to continue on this path to try and show me

you're an exception to how this works.

Do you understand that?

Yes.

OK.

So what do you want to do?

I don't know.

May I have some time to figure out what I'm gonna do?

I would really appreciate it because this is

a really big question for me.

I thought I was gonna make more progress.

OK.

Take some time.

But don't take too long and fall back into old habits

because if you start to gain again,

surgery won't be an option for you at that point.

OK.

So stick with it.

And let me know what you want to do.

OK.

I definitely will.

DR. NOWZARADAN: But you need to decide

what your life is worth to you if you

can't do this like you want.

Because if you start gaining again,

you're gonna be back to where you were very quickly.

And that is a very dangerous place to be.

MELISSA: I know.

I won't let that happen.

OK.

Melissa, good to see you.

Thank you so much.

DR. NOWZARADAN: You're welcome.

It's unfortunate that Melissa isn't seeing her situation

objectively and waking up to what the scale is telling her

because right now, she's not headed in a good direction

if she continues to try to do things how she wants.

I've been happy to see how she's been

willing to make the changes she needs to get her life on track

and be healthy.

But she still has a long way to go

to get to where she needs to be to be able to maintain

this for the long term.

And there's no point to do a major surgery

on her if it's not going to make a difference long term.

But right now, she is at a point where

it's going to get much harder for her

to keep going if she doesn't make the choice she needs.

So hopefully she realizes the reality of her situation soon

and the steps she needs to take to get the support she needs

before she starts heading back in the wrong direction

again because she still has a lot of strain on her body.

And to try to put more back on won't be good for her.

But we have done all we can to offer her a path

to get to where she needs.

The only step left for her is to make a decision for what she

wants to do and whether her life is worth giving up the comfort

of her home for a little while.

MELISSA: After my last appointment with Dr. Now,

I thought about the choices he was giving me.

And I've decided that for right now, the best thing for me

is to be in Florida for a number of reasons.

You know, overall, I have no doubt

that I'm gonna be able to stay on track

and keep losing the weight here even if it's not as much

as Dr. Now thinks I should.

So today, I am going to lunch with a guy that I just met,

I've been speaking to for some time.

I'm really nervous.

But the biggest thing for me is that I'm

finally starting to get the life I'm working hard to have here.

And it doesn't make sense for me to just give all that up right

now when I don't think I should because it's what's motivating

me to keep pushing myself to work

as hard as I can to lose more.

What's up?

Hello!

How you been?

I'm good.

How you been?

Good.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

It's really hot.

MELISSA: It is.

I'm happy you asked me out.

ELIJAH: Really?

Yeah.

I'm happy you accepted.

OK.

Oh, wow. That's a lot of food.

WAITRESS: OK.

Here we go.

Yeah, they don't mess around.

MELISSA: I need the inspiration of being

able to be with the people who support me

and who are there for me.

So I know it's the right decision

and what's best for me.

But it doesn't mean I'm giving up on weight loss surgery.

I still know I need that tool to help me for the long term

like Dr. Now says.

But once I get down to the 300s, my

hope I could get back and show Dr. Now

that I'm doing it to help him see

how determined I am to succeed no matter where I am.

But I'm sticking to a healthy diet.

And I'm still losing weight.

But you know, feel like doing this to get your life,

you know, in order.

And it's something that you really want.

And it takes a lot of courage.

Aw!

I really hope after this that you're truly happy.

Really?

Everyone deserves to be truly happy.

MELISSA: I've lost almost 10 pounds

over the last two months.

So I'm still making progress even though it's slower.

And as long as I'm moving forward, I know I'm doing this.

I'm gonna cook you dinner.

How about that?

OK.

You better put your foot in that.

[laughs]

I'm talking that better be delicious.

You know?

MELISSA: [laughs] It's gonna to be the best macaroni and cheese

you had in your life.

OK.

OK.

MELISSA: I'm also keeping up with all my exercises.

And Elijah's been a big help with me to do that.

How you been?

Tired. [laughs]

I feel you.

MELISSA: He's pushing me to be active

and working out with me at times.

So I've appreciated all his support because he's

helping keeping me motivated.

And I've appreciated that.

So I feel really good right now.

And I'm still very excited about my future

even more now than ever because I know I'm gonna make it.

And I'm doing this, you know, even if it doesn't look

like how I thought it would to where it's taken me longer

to get weight loss surgery.

The water is pretty.

It is.

This is the most beautiful place to get

to know someone and walk.

To get to know me better?

Yeah.

But the fact that you took your time to come and see me?

This just puts a smile on my face.

Aw!

You're making me blush.

But I know without a doubt that this route I'm taking

is what's right for me and how I need

to do it because I'm starting to live how I want now.

I'm not having to wait for it.

My hard work is paying off.

And I'm doing things that I wasn't doing a year ago.

So that's keeping me motivated.

And I'm gonna keep pushing myself forward no matter what.

And hopefully when I go back to Dr. Now in a few months

and show him, that he sees that and I'm able to get

weight loss surgery.

I really hope you feel better.

And--

I feel better that I'm here with you.

Really?

Mm-hmm.

Man, now you making me blush.

[laughs] Because I'm not gonna stop fighting for my life

until I make it where I need no matter

what anybody thinks or says.

Just because I'm doing it my way and how I need,

it doesn't mean I'm gonna fail because no one knows

how bad I want this but me.

And I want this more than anything.

So I'm gonna keep going.

And I'm gonna succeed because I'm not

gonna stop or give up until I'm living my best life yet

and I get to where I need.

And I know I'm gonna do it.

I'm gonna show everyone I can make it.

And I have everything I need to do that in Florida.

No matter what, I'm gonna keep moving forward

and working on whatever I need.

And I have no doubt my best life and days are ahead of me now.

And I can't wait for all that's gonna

be there for me so I can finally have the life that I want.

And I can't wait for that.