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[gentle birdsong]
2
00:00:15,603 --> 00:00:17,688
[magpies warble]
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00:00:17,688 --> 00:00:19,524
[ethereal music]
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00:00:19,524 --> 00:00:21,984
[gentle birdsong]
5
00:00:45,925 --> 00:00:48,094
[magpies warble]
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00:00:51,055 --> 00:00:53,057
[Hannah] So remember,
just do the task.
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00:00:53,057 --> 00:00:56,602
Simply see the person's hands
and describe them.
8
00:00:56,602 --> 00:00:57,853
[students chatter]
9
00:00:57,853 --> 00:01:01,274
So you've got
a little roundy scar
10
00:01:01,274 --> 00:01:03,067
on the knuckle there.
11
00:01:03,109 --> 00:01:04,485
And, um...
12
00:01:04,652 --> 00:01:09,365
...you've got lovely long
fingers, really... nice nails.
13
00:01:09,365 --> 00:01:11,200
- [laughs nervously]
- [Hannah] Don't judge.
14
00:01:11,200 --> 00:01:13,286
It's not about whether
the hand is good or bad.
15
00:01:13,286 --> 00:01:15,746
Just about observing,
paying attention.
16
00:01:15,746 --> 00:01:16,789
OK?
17
00:01:17,790 --> 00:01:19,333
- May I?
- Yeah.
18
00:01:26,632 --> 00:01:28,301
OK, long fingers.
19
00:01:29,468 --> 00:01:30,845
There's a scratch there
20
00:01:30,845 --> 00:01:32,763
on the knuckle of
the index finger.
21
00:01:32,763 --> 00:01:34,098
Cat scratch.
22
00:01:34,098 --> 00:01:36,142
And there's another one there
just higher up.
23
00:01:36,142 --> 00:01:38,603
It veers off to the left a bit.
24
00:01:38,603 --> 00:01:41,856
The thumb has a little
bitten bit to the left
25
00:01:41,856 --> 00:01:43,566
of the nail.
26
00:01:43,566 --> 00:01:47,320
And when you've done the task,
just the task, long enough,
27
00:01:47,320 --> 00:01:50,156
uh, you move up to their face,
28
00:01:50,156 --> 00:01:51,699
their eyes.
29
00:01:53,993 --> 00:01:57,163
And the top dark lash line
30
00:01:57,163 --> 00:02:02,585
just cuts off the very tip of
the... the dark brown iris.
31
00:02:02,585 --> 00:02:04,629
And there's a...
there's a darker line
32
00:02:04,629 --> 00:02:06,297
around the outside of the iris.
33
00:02:08,591 --> 00:02:12,219
And it's... it's hard not to
feel a... an intimacy.
34
00:02:12,219 --> 00:02:15,890
An almost instant intimacy
and a...
35
00:02:17,266 --> 00:02:18,559
An excitement?
36
00:02:18,559 --> 00:02:21,020
Yeah, for sure, an excitement
in the intimacy.
37
00:02:21,020 --> 00:02:24,690
And it's a good way to create
an intense intimacy
38
00:02:24,690 --> 00:02:27,234
between your actors
and sometimes with you.
39
00:02:27,234 --> 00:02:29,487
You know, and it's
an intimacy you'll feel
40
00:02:29,487 --> 00:02:30,738
very comfortable with.
41
00:02:30,738 --> 00:02:32,031
It's our job.
42
00:02:32,031 --> 00:02:34,450
But they need to
understand this pact -
43
00:02:34,450 --> 00:02:35,534
what it's for,
44
00:02:35,534 --> 00:02:38,120
that the intimacy
is for the work.
45
00:02:38,120 --> 00:02:40,206
OK? Do you want to carry on?
46
00:02:40,206 --> 00:02:41,582
- [student] Yep.
- Thank you.
47
00:02:41,582 --> 00:02:43,918
[students murmur]
48
00:02:45,753 --> 00:02:46,962
OK.
49
00:02:46,962 --> 00:02:48,756
[Hannah] OK, well done.
50
00:02:51,842 --> 00:02:54,011
[Jim on phone] Ah,
that's always a bad sign.
51
00:02:54,011 --> 00:02:56,180
[Hannah] He was meant to stay
with our friend Renate,
52
00:02:56,180 --> 00:02:58,349
but he's peeing all over
the place and there's...
53
00:02:58,349 --> 00:02:59,809
[Jim] Blood in the piss?
54
00:02:59,809 --> 00:03:01,477
[Hannah]
Yeah, blood in the urine.
55
00:03:01,477 --> 00:03:03,979
[Jim] Dearest,
why do you say 'urine'?
56
00:03:03,979 --> 00:03:05,690
[Hannah] Well, what do you
want me to say?
57
00:03:05,690 --> 00:03:08,192
[Jim] I want you to tell me
what's wrong with him.
58
00:03:08,234 --> 00:03:09,985
[Hannah] I am telling you
what's wrong with him.
59
00:03:09,985 --> 00:03:11,654
[Jim] Is it cancer?
60
00:03:11,654 --> 00:03:13,614
Yeah, tumour in his bladder.
61
00:03:13,614 --> 00:03:16,033
[Jim sighs] What timing.
62
00:03:16,033 --> 00:03:17,785
Yeah, you could say that.
63
00:03:17,785 --> 00:03:21,080
[Jim] I could say that, yes.
I did just say that, didn't I?
64
00:03:21,080 --> 00:03:22,832
[Hannah chuckles]
yeah, you did just say that.
65
00:03:22,832 --> 00:03:24,750
[Jim laughs]
Every time you go on holiday,
66
00:03:24,750 --> 00:03:26,252
something bad happens.
67
00:03:26,252 --> 00:03:27,712
[Hannah]
Well, it's not just a holiday.
68
00:03:27,712 --> 00:03:29,964
I've got work too
and that's harder to cancel.
69
00:03:29,964 --> 00:03:31,590
[Jim] A visit to
your beloved dad
70
00:03:31,590 --> 00:03:33,551
is easier to cancel than work?
71
00:03:33,551 --> 00:03:36,095
- Oh! I get it.
- You actually do get it.
72
00:03:36,095 --> 00:03:38,431
[Jim laughs] Yeah, it's true.
73
00:03:38,431 --> 00:03:39,849
[Hannah chuckles]
74
00:03:41,225 --> 00:03:43,227
I just don't know
if I can burden a friend
75
00:03:43,227 --> 00:03:44,478
with a dying dog.
76
00:03:45,438 --> 00:03:48,315
Might only have two weeks
and we wouldn't be around.
77
00:03:48,315 --> 00:03:51,694
[Jim] if he's in a lot of pain,
you should put him down now.
78
00:03:51,694 --> 00:03:53,195
[Hannah] Mmm.
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00:03:53,195 --> 00:03:55,364
[Jim] Dogs don't show
their suffering.
80
00:03:55,364 --> 00:03:57,158
That's why we love them.
81
00:03:57,158 --> 00:03:58,909
Is that why we love them?
82
00:03:58,909 --> 00:04:00,953
[Jim] Dear daughter,
you know you can't
83
00:04:00,953 --> 00:04:02,913
keep him around
just for your sake.
84
00:04:02,913 --> 00:04:04,123
I'm just not sure we can
85
00:04:04,123 --> 00:04:06,208
say goodbye that fast
and get on a plane.
86
00:04:07,376 --> 00:04:09,170
[Jim] Don't hang onto him.
87
00:04:09,170 --> 00:04:11,255
It's the kindest thing
you could do.
88
00:04:12,256 --> 00:04:13,466
Maybe.
89
00:04:13,466 --> 00:04:15,634
[gentle music]
90
00:04:16,635 --> 00:04:17,803
I'll look after him.
91
00:04:17,803 --> 00:04:20,055
No, you've already got plans,
don't you?
92
00:04:20,055 --> 00:04:22,016
I've already
changed things around.
93
00:04:23,976 --> 00:04:25,853
I don't want him to suffer.
94
00:04:25,853 --> 00:04:28,022
You can't postpone your trip.
95
00:04:28,022 --> 00:04:30,524
Dad said I should put him
down now, not prolong it.
96
00:04:30,524 --> 00:04:33,944
Oh, right. Well, your fucking
father would say that.
97
00:04:33,944 --> 00:04:36,906
Sorry, Kirby was his gift.
98
00:04:36,906 --> 00:04:38,908
I feel like he's got
a say in it.
99
00:04:38,908 --> 00:04:39,950
[vet] Of course.
100
00:04:39,950 --> 00:04:41,994
What does he think
about your film?
101
00:04:41,994 --> 00:04:43,412
I haven't talked to him
about it yet.
102
00:04:43,412 --> 00:04:44,580
Oh.
103
00:04:44,580 --> 00:04:46,624
Well, you could arrive
104
00:04:46,624 --> 00:04:48,542
to a house full of stray gays
105
00:04:48,542 --> 00:04:51,086
and he won't have time
for you or Frances.
106
00:04:51,086 --> 00:04:52,213
[Hannah] Maybe.
107
00:04:54,256 --> 00:04:56,759
[Hannah] I picked up mince from
the butcher, and I read that
108
00:04:56,759 --> 00:04:58,969
if you put the tablets
in that, he should eat it.
109
00:04:58,969 --> 00:05:00,304
If that doesn't work,
110
00:05:00,304 --> 00:05:02,348
get the vet to make it
into a flavoured liquid.
111
00:05:02,348 --> 00:05:04,725
Yeah, if he changes
energy levels or appetite,
112
00:05:04,725 --> 00:05:05,976
you let me know.
113
00:05:07,186 --> 00:05:08,646
[whispers] Sorry.
114
00:05:08,646 --> 00:05:11,065
Yeah, well, the teaching
helps pay for the trip over,
115
00:05:11,065 --> 00:05:13,734
but we will see him.
116
00:05:13,776 --> 00:05:15,444
[Harry] We're staying with him.
117
00:05:15,444 --> 00:05:16,987
[Hannah] Yeah,
we're staying with him, Mum.
118
00:05:18,572 --> 00:05:21,283
I'm going so I can see Dad,
so, yeah, of course.
119
00:05:24,245 --> 00:05:25,371
Listen, I've got to go,
120
00:05:25,371 --> 00:05:26,872
but, uh, if he changes
even his gait
121
00:05:26,872 --> 00:05:30,876
or... or sleeping patterns,
you let me know, OK?
122
00:05:30,876 --> 00:05:32,294
Bye.
123
00:05:36,006 --> 00:05:37,424
Are you OK, Mum?
124
00:05:38,592 --> 00:05:40,386
I should have said,
"I love you."
125
00:05:40,386 --> 00:05:41,554
To Kirby?
126
00:05:41,554 --> 00:05:43,264
No, to Mum. I just said, "Bye."
127
00:05:43,264 --> 00:05:45,015
I should have said,
"I love you."
128
00:05:47,852 --> 00:05:49,186
[exhales]
129
00:05:50,271 --> 00:05:51,647
[gate agent] Have a good flight.
130
00:05:51,647 --> 00:05:54,316
[expectant music]
131
00:05:55,568 --> 00:05:56,569
All good?
132
00:05:56,569 --> 00:05:58,571
Yeah, all good.
133
00:05:58,571 --> 00:06:00,030
What did you want to talk about?
134
00:06:02,074 --> 00:06:04,118
It's OK. Now's not a good time.
135
00:06:04,118 --> 00:06:05,870
[Hannah] It's fine. Tell me.
136
00:06:05,870 --> 00:06:07,329
OK.
137
00:06:08,497 --> 00:06:10,958
I wanna live with Jimpa
for a bit.
138
00:06:10,958 --> 00:06:12,668
What do you mean?
139
00:06:12,668 --> 00:06:14,336
[Frances] Mm, I was thinking
140
00:06:14,336 --> 00:06:16,964
I could do Year 11
in Amsterdam with Jimpa.
141
00:06:16,964 --> 00:06:18,966
- [Harry] No way.
- [Frances] Why not?
142
00:06:21,385 --> 00:06:23,178
He's still recovering
from a stroke.
143
00:06:23,178 --> 00:06:24,889
That was three years ago.
144
00:06:24,889 --> 00:06:28,267
No way! It's an important year
next year and you're only 16.
145
00:06:28,267 --> 00:06:30,853
And we're your parents, not Jim.
146
00:06:30,853 --> 00:06:32,229
Why don't you wait?
147
00:06:32,229 --> 00:06:34,940
Do it after graduation.
You can have a gap year.
148
00:06:34,940 --> 00:06:37,735
Because I need to experience
a bigger queer community
149
00:06:37,776 --> 00:06:39,570
than my shitty LGBT club
at school
150
00:06:39,570 --> 00:06:40,905
in my shitty little city.
151
00:06:40,905 --> 00:06:43,032
But you love school.
152
00:06:43,032 --> 00:06:44,783
I used to.
153
00:06:46,076 --> 00:06:47,995
[Harry] Is that why
you packed so much?
154
00:06:47,995 --> 00:06:49,622
You just thought
you'd stay there?
155
00:06:50,581 --> 00:06:53,459
Oh! [laughs] What a waste
of a return flight.
156
00:06:53,459 --> 00:06:54,668
We could have saved a fortune!
157
00:06:54,668 --> 00:06:55,878
OK, let's talk about this later.
158
00:06:55,878 --> 00:06:57,504
But you asked me
to talk about it.
159
00:06:57,504 --> 00:06:59,381
I feel like I need to
give you my full attention.
160
00:06:59,381 --> 00:07:00,841
I don't think I can do that
at the moment.
161
00:07:00,841 --> 00:07:03,427
[Harry] OK, well,
let's just all relax.
162
00:07:10,184 --> 00:07:11,352
Mum?
163
00:07:11,352 --> 00:07:12,519
Mmm?
164
00:07:12,519 --> 00:07:14,146
It's OK.
165
00:07:16,231 --> 00:07:17,316
[kisses]
166
00:07:24,406 --> 00:07:26,909
[Hannah] Kirby was
a gift from my father.
167
00:07:28,035 --> 00:07:30,579
One day he turned up with
an uncontrollable puppy.
168
00:07:32,122 --> 00:07:35,417
I didn't want him,
but I didn't get a choice.
169
00:07:36,502 --> 00:07:38,796
Says a lot about my dad.
[chuckles]
170
00:07:40,714 --> 00:07:42,549
[Frances] The day my mum
gave birth to me,
171
00:07:42,549 --> 00:07:44,927
my grandfather got on
the first flight to Adelaide.
172
00:07:45,928 --> 00:07:47,346
[Hannah] I wanted us to be alone
173
00:07:47,346 --> 00:07:49,306
with our newborn baby.
174
00:07:49,306 --> 00:07:51,433
But he rang from
the front door
175
00:07:51,433 --> 00:07:52,768
with a painting.
176
00:07:53,727 --> 00:07:55,020
[younger Jim chuckles]
177
00:07:55,020 --> 00:07:57,189
[Frances] And my mum
was so happy to see him.
178
00:07:57,189 --> 00:07:59,191
And she said to me, "Frances,
179
00:07:59,191 --> 00:08:01,443
"this person will
tell you about art
180
00:08:01,443 --> 00:08:04,571
"and politics and theatre.
181
00:08:04,571 --> 00:08:07,449
"He will challenge you to be
the best version of yourself."
182
00:08:08,742 --> 00:08:10,452
[Hannah] I simply said,
183
00:08:10,452 --> 00:08:13,539
"Frances, this is
your grandpa, Jim."
184
00:08:13,539 --> 00:08:15,916
But he thought 'grandpa'
sounded too old.
185
00:08:15,916 --> 00:08:16,917
[magpies warble]
186
00:08:16,917 --> 00:08:18,544
So he gave himself a new name.
187
00:08:18,544 --> 00:08:19,962
He said...
188
00:08:19,962 --> 00:08:22,631
[Frances]
"Hello, Frances. I'm Jimpa."
189
00:08:27,720 --> 00:08:30,472
[Frances] The thing is,
I don't think I would be here
190
00:08:30,472 --> 00:08:35,102
openly trans, non-binary,
queer if it wasn't for him.
191
00:08:36,228 --> 00:08:38,522
That's him sometime in the '50s.
192
00:08:40,691 --> 00:08:41,900
He loves art
193
00:08:41,900 --> 00:08:43,485
and he loves to get naked.
194
00:08:43,485 --> 00:08:44,778
[students laugh]
195
00:08:44,778 --> 00:08:46,447
[Frances]
And he still has a painting
196
00:08:46,447 --> 00:08:48,907
that he sat for years ago
which hangs
197
00:08:48,907 --> 00:08:51,702
in his apartment in Amsterdam
for all to see.
198
00:08:51,702 --> 00:08:52,995
[students chuckle]
199
00:08:53,954 --> 00:08:57,708
He married my grandmother,
Katherine, in 1973.
200
00:08:57,708 --> 00:09:00,127
They had Emily, my aunt,
201
00:09:00,127 --> 00:09:01,628
and Hannah, my mum.
202
00:09:02,755 --> 00:09:05,841
Right after my mum was born,
Jimpa came out as gay.
203
00:09:05,841 --> 00:09:08,469
[gentle piano music]
204
00:09:13,807 --> 00:09:15,851
My grandma got really skinny
after this,
205
00:09:15,851 --> 00:09:17,352
as well as a big perm,
206
00:09:17,352 --> 00:09:20,898
and everyone complimented her
on how amazing she looked.
207
00:09:20,898 --> 00:09:22,191
[laughs]
208
00:09:24,860 --> 00:09:28,697
Uh, so, obviously it was
devastating for her.
209
00:09:29,907 --> 00:09:32,076
Uh, we expect
the... the narrative
210
00:09:32,076 --> 00:09:34,745
of a husband
coming out to his wife
211
00:09:34,745 --> 00:09:37,831
to follow the notes of
a big betrayal in a marriage.
212
00:09:37,831 --> 00:09:40,667
But she chose to
respond differently
213
00:09:40,667 --> 00:09:42,211
than what was expected.
214
00:09:42,211 --> 00:09:46,256
Um, they both decided
on a new bond -
215
00:09:46,256 --> 00:09:49,843
to stay together,
uh, to co-parent.
216
00:09:49,843 --> 00:09:51,887
Uh, also to have
other relationships.
217
00:09:51,887 --> 00:09:56,767
But they chose kindness
rather than conflict.
218
00:09:56,767 --> 00:09:59,478
Jimpa always argues.
219
00:09:59,478 --> 00:10:01,063
- [phone rings]
- Look, mate, you know...
220
00:10:01,063 --> 00:10:02,439
I don't think...
221
00:10:02,439 --> 00:10:03,690
[Frances] He worked in politics
222
00:10:03,690 --> 00:10:05,067
when my mum was little.
223
00:10:08,028 --> 00:10:10,489
And then during
the AIDS crisis,
224
00:10:10,489 --> 00:10:12,866
he moved to Amsterdam
to work in public health.
225
00:10:12,866 --> 00:10:13,992
[fingers click]
226
00:10:13,992 --> 00:10:16,078
And he's never
stopped fighting
227
00:10:16,078 --> 00:10:19,164
for those he loves
and for who he is.
228
00:10:20,124 --> 00:10:22,501
All the while still enjoying
getting naked.
229
00:10:24,711 --> 00:10:27,714
So it's a personal story
about my parents,
230
00:10:27,714 --> 00:10:32,052
um, and my main drive is to
tell the story of the kindness
231
00:10:32,052 --> 00:10:34,555
they showed to each other
over that period
232
00:10:34,555 --> 00:10:36,640
rather than the conflict.
233
00:10:37,891 --> 00:10:39,810
So it's a drama
without conflict.
234
00:10:42,938 --> 00:10:44,648
But...
235
00:10:44,648 --> 00:10:49,111
...isn't drama by very
definition conflict?
236
00:10:49,111 --> 00:10:51,864
I think it's possible
to make a compelling film
237
00:10:51,864 --> 00:10:53,490
avoiding it completely.
238
00:10:54,700 --> 00:10:56,285
I don't think it is.
239
00:10:56,285 --> 00:10:58,203
I think you're wrong.
240
00:11:00,914 --> 00:11:02,541
See, is that conflict?
241
00:11:02,541 --> 00:11:04,793
Well, I think that's someone
242
00:11:04,793 --> 00:11:07,171
expressing a different opinion.
243
00:11:07,171 --> 00:11:08,797
A conflict of opinion.
244
00:11:09,923 --> 00:11:11,300
Therefore...
245
00:11:11,300 --> 00:11:12,718
...conflict.
246
00:11:13,927 --> 00:11:15,262
Maybe.
247
00:11:16,805 --> 00:11:19,266
[Frances] So he's not
just my grandpa.
248
00:11:19,266 --> 00:11:22,686
I think he's my true
forever hero.
249
00:11:23,729 --> 00:11:25,022
Any questions?
250
00:11:31,737 --> 00:11:33,488
[school bell rings]
251
00:11:33,488 --> 00:11:36,533
[students chatter softly]
252
00:11:43,624 --> 00:11:45,375
[Harry] We should
wake Frances up.
253
00:11:48,003 --> 00:11:50,505
Don't. Let them sleep.
254
00:11:54,426 --> 00:11:56,220
It's probably just
a passing fancy,
255
00:11:56,220 --> 00:11:58,138
the excitement of travel.
256
00:11:58,138 --> 00:12:00,307
So you do think it's a bad idea.
257
00:12:01,767 --> 00:12:03,769
I think once Frances
spends some time with Dad,
258
00:12:03,769 --> 00:12:05,145
they'll soon change their mind.
259
00:12:05,145 --> 00:12:06,730
[Harry] Really?
260
00:12:06,730 --> 00:12:08,565
Frances idolises him.
261
00:12:08,565 --> 00:12:10,943
But they only see each other
once every couple of years
262
00:12:10,984 --> 00:12:12,402
and Frances has built up
263
00:12:12,402 --> 00:12:14,029
this idea of him in their head.
264
00:12:15,072 --> 00:12:16,698
And Dad can be very appealing,
265
00:12:16,698 --> 00:12:18,533
but just because
he's got all these great,
266
00:12:18,533 --> 00:12:19,910
very admirable ideals
267
00:12:19,910 --> 00:12:21,828
doesn't mean he necessarily
puts them into practice.
268
00:12:21,828 --> 00:12:23,914
Can you imagine
living with Dad for a year?
269
00:12:23,914 --> 00:12:25,457
No.
270
00:12:25,457 --> 00:12:28,168
And we don't want to be
the ones saying no to Frances.
271
00:12:28,168 --> 00:12:29,169
It doesn't help.
272
00:12:29,169 --> 00:12:31,088
I'm quite happy saying no.
273
00:12:31,088 --> 00:12:32,673
But you prefer Frances to be
274
00:12:32,673 --> 00:12:34,967
disappointed by your father
rather than by you.
275
00:12:36,426 --> 00:12:37,844
Or...
276
00:12:38,053 --> 00:12:42,391
...we let Frances come to
understand Jim a bit better...
277
00:12:42,391 --> 00:12:43,976
...and make a better choice
then.
278
00:12:49,856 --> 00:12:51,650
Their food's getting cold.
279
00:12:51,650 --> 00:12:54,611
So the food gets cold.
Let them sleep.
280
00:12:55,737 --> 00:12:57,990
Is making our daughter go hungry
281
00:12:57,990 --> 00:12:59,992
really worth avoiding
this conversation?
282
00:12:59,992 --> 00:13:02,953
Do you think Frances would
rather we use the word 'child'
283
00:13:02,953 --> 00:13:04,413
than 'daughter'?
284
00:13:04,413 --> 00:13:06,581
Why don't we ask them?
285
00:13:17,259 --> 00:13:18,844
[laughs]
286
00:13:25,934 --> 00:13:27,144
[Harry chuckles]
287
00:13:27,144 --> 00:13:28,562
Richard!
288
00:13:28,562 --> 00:13:31,023
What a beautiful sight!
289
00:13:31,023 --> 00:13:32,482
[Frances] There he is.
290
00:13:32,482 --> 00:13:34,026
[photographer] Richard.
291
00:13:35,193 --> 00:13:36,361
Smiling.
292
00:13:38,655 --> 00:13:39,948
[camera clicks]
293
00:13:39,948 --> 00:13:41,908
[Frances laughs] Hey.
294
00:13:41,908 --> 00:13:43,994
- Oh, look at you!
- [Hannah] Oh!
295
00:13:43,994 --> 00:13:45,746
Oh, wow!
296
00:13:45,746 --> 00:13:47,622
[Hannah] Sorry, we didn't sleep
much on the plane.
297
00:13:47,622 --> 00:13:49,708
[Harry] Why are you
apologising? Do we smell?
298
00:13:49,708 --> 00:13:51,126
[Frances]
No, it's 'cause Richard's
299
00:13:51,126 --> 00:13:52,669
so perfectly put together.
300
00:13:52,669 --> 00:13:53,712
You're so stylish.
301
00:13:53,712 --> 00:13:55,005
Oh, thank you.
302
00:13:55,005 --> 00:13:57,841
Welcome, my smelly,
unfashionable Australians.
303
00:13:57,841 --> 00:13:59,843
Welkom in Amsterdam.
304
00:13:59,843 --> 00:14:01,428
[lighter flicks]
305
00:14:01,428 --> 00:14:03,555
[Richard speaks inaudibly]
306
00:14:03,555 --> 00:14:06,808
[subtle music]
307
00:14:10,687 --> 00:14:12,230
[Richard speaks inaudibly]
308
00:14:12,230 --> 00:14:13,732
[Jim laughs]
309
00:14:13,732 --> 00:14:16,902
[photographer
speaks indistinctly]
310
00:14:16,902 --> 00:14:18,111
[camera clicks]
311
00:14:18,111 --> 00:14:19,321
[Hannah] Where's Dad?
312
00:14:19,321 --> 00:14:21,114
The Professor is "working".
313
00:14:21,114 --> 00:14:23,408
He sent me to collect you
with the boat.
314
00:14:23,408 --> 00:14:25,035
- Oh, we're going by boat?
- Yeah, I know.
315
00:14:25,035 --> 00:14:26,661
It's ridiculous and touristy,
316
00:14:26,661 --> 00:14:28,830
but he said that Frances
always loved the boat.
317
00:14:28,830 --> 00:14:30,457
[Hannah] I'm not sure
we'll all fit in.
318
00:14:30,457 --> 00:14:33,168
Oh, let's just go. I really
need to eat something.
319
00:14:33,168 --> 00:14:34,544
Oh!
320
00:14:34,544 --> 00:14:35,754
- Shut up.
- [Richard] OK. Alright.
321
00:14:35,754 --> 00:14:36,922
Let me grab this.
322
00:14:36,922 --> 00:14:38,215
- Wait, are they...
- [Frances] Nuh-uh-uh.
323
00:14:38,215 --> 00:14:40,967
[motor putters]
324
00:14:40,967 --> 00:14:42,552
[thunder rumbles]
325
00:14:47,516 --> 00:14:48,850
Sorry!
326
00:14:50,060 --> 00:14:52,729
[all chuckle]
327
00:14:58,860 --> 00:15:01,238
[all laugh]
328
00:15:02,239 --> 00:15:03,740
[Hannah] As his valued
research assistant,
329
00:15:03,740 --> 00:15:05,826
do you do many domestic errands?
330
00:15:05,826 --> 00:15:08,161
Who said anything about
research assistant?
331
00:15:08,161 --> 00:15:10,247
I'm his damn
everything assistant.
332
00:15:11,456 --> 00:15:13,792
At least for now.
333
00:15:13,792 --> 00:15:15,335
Is everything OK?
334
00:15:17,254 --> 00:15:21,049
He's leaving the university
at the end of the month.
335
00:15:21,049 --> 00:15:22,300
Well, that wasn't gonna
last forever.
336
00:15:22,300 --> 00:15:23,718
[Richard] Mmm.
337
00:15:25,804 --> 00:15:29,474
Does that mean you won't
have a job after that?
338
00:15:29,474 --> 00:15:31,226
He says I will,
but I don't see how.
339
00:15:32,644 --> 00:15:34,896
I'd follow him to the end of
the earth anyway.
340
00:15:34,896 --> 00:15:37,023
You know what he'd say to that?
341
00:15:38,275 --> 00:15:40,444
"Be grateful
and fuckin' move on."
342
00:15:40,485 --> 00:15:42,028
[both laugh]
343
00:15:42,028 --> 00:15:44,114
Oh, it's so nice to see you.
344
00:15:44,114 --> 00:15:45,991
[Richard] Well, it's really
nice to see you too.
345
00:15:45,991 --> 00:15:47,117
[Hannah] Yeah.
346
00:15:47,117 --> 00:15:48,660
[Richard and Hannah
chat indistinctly]
347
00:15:52,914 --> 00:15:54,374
[Harry] Where'd you get
that piece of shit?
348
00:15:54,374 --> 00:15:55,584
[Frances] Oh!
349
00:15:56,918 --> 00:15:58,378
Why don't you borrow
one of mine?
350
00:15:58,378 --> 00:16:00,797
No, no, don't you dare!
It's only got 27 shots.
351
00:16:00,797 --> 00:16:03,049
- Oh, OK, well, get it...
- Dad!
352
00:16:03,049 --> 00:16:04,968
- Why not?
- Give it back.
353
00:16:04,968 --> 00:16:06,428
- It's mine!
- [Harry laughs]
354
00:16:10,682 --> 00:16:12,476
- [camera clicks]
- Very good.
355
00:16:12,476 --> 00:16:14,895
[Richard] Photographer!
Like father, like child.
356
00:16:14,895 --> 00:16:16,730
[Harry] Whoa.
357
00:16:16,730 --> 00:16:18,273
[Frances] Makes me sound
like a kid.
358
00:16:18,273 --> 00:16:20,484
[Richard calls out]
Hiya! We're very wet!
359
00:16:21,610 --> 00:16:23,695
Hey, um, I've been
meaning to ask.
360
00:16:23,695 --> 00:16:25,947
Would you prefer
'daughter' or 'child'?
361
00:16:25,947 --> 00:16:27,949
Hmm, I mean,
'daughter's not great,
362
00:16:27,949 --> 00:16:29,659
but, um, I don't want you
to be calling me 'child'
363
00:16:29,659 --> 00:16:30,785
when I'm an adult.
364
00:16:30,785 --> 00:16:32,412
Dad still calls me child.
365
00:16:32,412 --> 00:16:34,956
[Jim] Because you'll always be
my child!
366
00:16:34,956 --> 00:16:36,625
Hello!
367
00:16:36,625 --> 00:16:39,211
It's the celebrity children!
368
00:16:39,211 --> 00:16:41,671
Come here, come here.
Oh! [laughs]
369
00:16:41,671 --> 00:16:44,257
Never be afraid
to be called a child.
370
00:16:44,257 --> 00:16:45,800
It's humbling.
371
00:16:45,800 --> 00:16:48,595
- Harry!
- [Harry] Hi! Hello!
372
00:16:48,595 --> 00:16:51,556
- How are you?
- My glorious grand-thing!
373
00:16:51,556 --> 00:16:54,559
Oh, you're all soggy.
374
00:16:54,559 --> 00:16:56,728
I told you it was going
to rain today, Richard.
375
00:16:56,728 --> 00:16:58,271
No hugs for you.
376
00:16:58,271 --> 00:17:00,148
You also told me
to take out the boat.
377
00:17:00,148 --> 00:17:02,526
Yeah, think for yourself.
That's what I pay you for.
378
00:17:02,526 --> 00:17:06,404
Old man, that is the one thing
you do not pay me for.
379
00:17:06,404 --> 00:17:09,199
Oh, years later and not one
single sexual favour.
380
00:17:09,199 --> 00:17:10,534
[Hannah] Dad!
381
00:17:10,534 --> 00:17:13,411
No, he's not good for anything
except making tea.
382
00:17:13,411 --> 00:17:15,247
So go make tea, assistant.
383
00:17:15,247 --> 00:17:16,831
Dad, you can't say this stuff.
384
00:17:16,831 --> 00:17:18,500
You don't know what you're
talking about, Professor.
385
00:17:18,500 --> 00:17:20,502
- You never let me make tea.
- [Harry] I'll make the tea.
386
00:17:20,502 --> 00:17:22,003
Yes, you go, Harry.
387
00:17:22,003 --> 00:17:23,797
Milk in first,
otherwise you'll...
388
00:17:23,797 --> 00:17:25,131
[both]...get pregnant.
389
00:17:25,131 --> 00:17:26,800
- [Harry] Yeah.
- Look. Look, look, look, look.
390
00:17:26,800 --> 00:17:28,426
Look what I got out.
391
00:17:28,426 --> 00:17:29,928
- Ooh!
- Look.
392
00:17:30,887 --> 00:17:32,514
Decades worth.
393
00:17:32,514 --> 00:17:34,891
Here. Uh, this one.
394
00:17:34,891 --> 00:17:37,060
'Dorothy's Best Friend'.
395
00:17:37,060 --> 00:17:39,104
Hmm! What does that mean?
396
00:17:39,104 --> 00:17:40,397
Oh!
397
00:17:40,397 --> 00:17:43,650
My dear grand-thing,
you have so much to learn.
398
00:17:43,650 --> 00:17:46,653
That's when there was
such a thing as subtext.
399
00:17:46,653 --> 00:17:48,029
The unnamed.
400
00:17:48,029 --> 00:17:51,491
When we had to use euphemism
to show solidarity,
401
00:17:51,491 --> 00:17:54,035
to codify and identify.
402
00:17:54,035 --> 00:17:55,203
That sounds horrifying.
403
00:17:55,203 --> 00:17:57,914
You're all text now.
404
00:17:57,914 --> 00:17:59,332
No subtext.
405
00:17:59,332 --> 00:18:00,792
No nuance.
406
00:18:00,792 --> 00:18:03,420
Yeah, well, it's tough
not being repressed.
407
00:18:03,420 --> 00:18:05,797
[both laugh]
408
00:18:05,797 --> 00:18:08,300
'Talk with us, not about us'.
409
00:18:08,300 --> 00:18:11,177
Hobart, 1988.
410
00:18:11,177 --> 00:18:14,014
Yeah.
You see, Richard? Good memory.
411
00:18:14,014 --> 00:18:16,057
Well done, Professor.
412
00:18:16,057 --> 00:18:20,687
[Jim] Ah, this one. '3rd
National Conference on AIDS'.
413
00:18:20,687 --> 00:18:24,816
We asked everyone with HIV
to take the stage.
414
00:18:26,318 --> 00:18:27,736
That was when
we first discovered
415
00:18:27,736 --> 00:18:30,614
that 50% of the staff
were positive.
416
00:18:32,824 --> 00:18:34,409
Including me.
417
00:18:35,410 --> 00:18:38,038
It was a scary moment,
418
00:18:38,038 --> 00:18:39,039
but rallying.
419
00:18:39,039 --> 00:18:40,165
[chuckles]
420
00:18:41,207 --> 00:18:45,295
More than half would be dead
within only a few years.
421
00:18:46,713 --> 00:18:48,632
As a friend of mine once said,
422
00:18:48,632 --> 00:18:51,384
"The toll of being
at the epicentre
423
00:18:51,384 --> 00:18:53,887
"was very large."
424
00:18:58,433 --> 00:19:00,852
'It's Not Just a Phase Week,
1984'.
425
00:19:00,852 --> 00:19:02,062
- Very cute.
- [Jim] Hmm.
426
00:19:02,062 --> 00:19:04,064
- [Hannah chuckles]
- These are all for you.
427
00:19:05,023 --> 00:19:06,107
What?
428
00:19:06,107 --> 00:19:08,401
- I'm bequeathing them to you.
- Why?
429
00:19:08,401 --> 00:19:10,612
What, my daughter
doesn't want them?
430
00:19:10,612 --> 00:19:12,530
Surely there's an archive
you can donate them to?
431
00:19:12,530 --> 00:19:14,032
Well, yes, but they're for you.
432
00:19:14,032 --> 00:19:15,700
[Frances]
I'll definitely take them.
433
00:19:15,700 --> 00:19:17,702
I feel a bit ambushed -
this is quite morbid,
434
00:19:17,702 --> 00:19:19,537
like there's gonna be
the reading of a will.
435
00:19:19,537 --> 00:19:21,331
They're just badges!
436
00:19:21,331 --> 00:19:23,208
[Hannah] Why have you
decided to do this now?
437
00:19:23,208 --> 00:19:24,584
What's the doctor say?
438
00:19:24,584 --> 00:19:25,710
[Jim scoffs]
439
00:19:25,710 --> 00:19:27,003
You worry too much.
440
00:19:27,003 --> 00:19:29,214
I thought Frances would
like them and she did.
441
00:19:29,214 --> 00:19:30,256
[Harry] They!
442
00:19:30,256 --> 00:19:31,299
Oh!
443
00:19:31,299 --> 00:19:32,717
[Richard clears throat]
444
00:19:32,717 --> 00:19:35,762
Would they like to give me
another hug
445
00:19:35,762 --> 00:19:37,681
or are they too busy
self-identifying?
446
00:19:37,681 --> 00:19:40,433
Why do you have to be
so provocative all the time?
447
00:19:40,433 --> 00:19:42,811
[Jim] Oh, I missed you.
448
00:19:42,811 --> 00:19:44,896
I love you too much!
449
00:19:44,896 --> 00:19:46,106
I love you too, Richard.
450
00:19:46,106 --> 00:19:48,274
- [Richard] Hmm.
- My beautiful assistant.
451
00:19:49,567 --> 00:19:50,819
I don't want your badges either,
452
00:19:50,860 --> 00:19:52,028
but thank you very much.
453
00:19:52,028 --> 00:19:53,988
Oh, shit!
It took me all morning.
454
00:19:53,988 --> 00:19:56,074
- I cried twice.
- [Richard] You did not!
455
00:19:56,074 --> 00:19:57,575
Three times.
456
00:19:57,575 --> 00:19:58,702
[chuckles]
457
00:19:58,702 --> 00:19:59,911
I might have a little lie-down.
458
00:19:59,911 --> 00:20:01,538
I didn't get much sleep
on the plane.
459
00:20:01,538 --> 00:20:03,540
- Mmm.
- You don't want your tea?
460
00:20:05,792 --> 00:20:08,044
Blatant display of
heterosexuality.
461
00:20:08,044 --> 00:20:09,462
- [Frances laughs]
- That's enough now!
462
00:20:09,462 --> 00:20:10,964
Oh, oh, oh.
463
00:20:10,964 --> 00:20:14,342
There's one
I especially wanted to find.
464
00:20:14,342 --> 00:20:15,427
[Frances] Mmm?
465
00:20:15,427 --> 00:20:18,138
[gentle music]
466
00:20:18,138 --> 00:20:22,267
[Jim chatters indistinctly]
467
00:20:24,853 --> 00:20:26,187
[Frances] That's you.
468
00:20:26,187 --> 00:20:27,814
[Jim laughs] Yes!
469
00:20:28,857 --> 00:20:31,401
- [traffic buzzes in distance]
- [birds tweet]
470
00:20:49,294 --> 00:20:51,421
[Harry] Hmm?
471
00:20:51,421 --> 00:20:53,673
[Harry chuckles] hmmm?
472
00:20:53,673 --> 00:20:55,800
You should have woken me up.
473
00:20:57,844 --> 00:20:59,387
[Harry] You're too cute
when you sleep.
474
00:20:59,387 --> 00:21:00,972
Why would I wake you up?
475
00:21:00,972 --> 00:21:03,057
I wanted to get through
some work
476
00:21:03,057 --> 00:21:05,185
so I could spend the day
with Dad and Frances.
477
00:21:05,185 --> 00:21:07,020
They know you have to work.
478
00:21:07,020 --> 00:21:09,355
Yeah, I know, but it doesn't
mean they like it.
479
00:21:11,441 --> 00:21:12,984
Are you afraid that Frances
480
00:21:12,984 --> 00:21:14,903
will spend some time alone
with Jim?
481
00:21:16,112 --> 00:21:17,405
[Harry chuckles]
482
00:21:18,823 --> 00:21:21,576
At some point,
he is gonna hurt Frances.
483
00:21:21,576 --> 00:21:24,412
Yeah. isn't that your plan?
484
00:21:24,412 --> 00:21:26,915
Frances spends time with Jim.
485
00:21:26,915 --> 00:21:29,709
He eventually disappoints them
486
00:21:29,709 --> 00:21:31,795
and they change their mind
487
00:21:31,795 --> 00:21:33,713
about wanting to live here
for a year.
488
00:21:34,631 --> 00:21:36,674
Yeah, but there is
a difference between
489
00:21:36,674 --> 00:21:38,218
being disappointed
and being hurt.
490
00:21:39,219 --> 00:21:40,887
So talk to our child.
491
00:21:40,887 --> 00:21:42,972
Tell them what to expect.
492
00:21:45,350 --> 00:21:47,727
He said, "I love you,"
to Frances.
493
00:21:47,727 --> 00:21:49,479
And to Richard.
494
00:21:50,605 --> 00:21:52,232
He never used to say,
"I love you."
495
00:21:52,232 --> 00:21:53,650
He used to say, "You show love
496
00:21:53,650 --> 00:21:55,235
"with actions, not empty words."
497
00:21:57,070 --> 00:21:59,113
He's softened since the stroke.
498
00:22:00,240 --> 00:22:01,491
He's different.
499
00:22:03,201 --> 00:22:05,495
Your cunning plan
might not work.
500
00:22:07,288 --> 00:22:09,374
Oh. Maybe.
501
00:22:09,374 --> 00:22:12,585
[Harry laughs]
502
00:22:14,128 --> 00:22:15,505
[Harry] Hmm.
503
00:22:15,505 --> 00:22:17,006
Go get 'em, tiger.
504
00:22:23,137 --> 00:22:24,514
[bike bell dings outside]
505
00:22:29,102 --> 00:22:30,770
[puts note down]
506
00:22:38,903 --> 00:22:40,822
[Cody] I love it. I really do.
507
00:22:41,948 --> 00:22:44,826
I do find it hard to believe
there wasn't any conflict
508
00:22:44,826 --> 00:22:48,663
when your dad
finally left you at...
509
00:22:48,663 --> 00:22:49,914
13.
510
00:22:49,914 --> 00:22:51,416
[Cody] ... 13.
511
00:22:52,333 --> 00:22:55,545
Conflict would have been there
even if it's repressed.
512
00:22:55,545 --> 00:22:58,965
I think any 13-year-old
would be sad
513
00:22:58,965 --> 00:23:00,425
being without their father.
514
00:23:00,425 --> 00:23:02,176
Why did he leave, then?
515
00:23:02,176 --> 00:23:05,763
After staying with your mother
for so long after coming out?
516
00:23:05,763 --> 00:23:07,140
Uh, work.
517
00:23:07,140 --> 00:23:10,435
As a gay man and a political
one, he hit a ceiling,
518
00:23:10,435 --> 00:23:12,061
and, uh...
519
00:23:12,061 --> 00:23:13,688
...he needed to find
opportunities
520
00:23:13,688 --> 00:23:16,190
in a more progressive
part of the world.
521
00:23:17,275 --> 00:23:18,359
OK.
522
00:23:18,359 --> 00:23:21,112
So there is conflict there
for him.
523
00:23:21,112 --> 00:23:25,617
Do I stay with my family and
sacrifice my own ambition?
524
00:23:25,617 --> 00:23:28,369
Or do I owe it to myself
525
00:23:28,369 --> 00:23:31,372
to fully explore who I am
and my opportunities?
526
00:23:31,372 --> 00:23:34,000
But he hit the ceiling
and he made the choice
527
00:23:34,000 --> 00:23:35,376
at the expense of his family.
528
00:23:35,376 --> 00:23:37,378
The family accepted him,
529
00:23:37,378 --> 00:23:38,838
loved him,
530
00:23:38,838 --> 00:23:41,466
he was able to be himself,
but...
531
00:23:41,466 --> 00:23:42,926
...still left them.
532
00:23:43,927 --> 00:23:45,094
You weren't hurt
533
00:23:45,094 --> 00:23:46,930
or angry at your father
leaving?
534
00:23:47,889 --> 00:23:52,477
Uh, we understood
that he needed to leave.
535
00:23:52,477 --> 00:23:54,145
What matters to me
536
00:23:54,145 --> 00:23:57,357
is how hard everyone tried
to do the right thing.
537
00:23:57,357 --> 00:24:00,109
Uh, it's not important
if I was hurt or angry.
538
00:24:00,109 --> 00:24:02,278
What if I'm angry now,
for instance?
539
00:24:03,237 --> 00:24:04,614
You're angry now?
540
00:24:04,614 --> 00:24:07,742
Mmm. Would it help
to express it?
541
00:24:07,742 --> 00:24:09,744
Uh, I'm not so sure.
542
00:24:09,744 --> 00:24:11,162
And would it help
with this meeting
543
00:24:11,162 --> 00:24:12,747
or us working together?
544
00:24:12,747 --> 00:24:14,332
Definitely not. [chuckles]
545
00:24:17,085 --> 00:24:19,921
- [clears throat]
- O... OK, um...
546
00:24:19,921 --> 00:24:21,798
[app chimes]
547
00:24:21,798 --> 00:24:23,633
[mutters] Fuck me.
548
00:24:26,636 --> 00:24:28,638
- [door locks click]
- [keys jangle]
549
00:24:30,223 --> 00:24:31,474
[door closes]
550
00:24:31,474 --> 00:24:32,725
[woman] Hello?
551
00:24:32,725 --> 00:24:33,893
Hello?
552
00:24:35,770 --> 00:24:36,896
[woman] Hello?
553
00:24:36,896 --> 00:24:38,106
Hello.
554
00:24:39,107 --> 00:24:41,317
[warm music]
555
00:24:41,317 --> 00:24:44,153
I bet he hasn't
left one for you.
556
00:24:44,153 --> 00:24:45,238
Oh!
557
00:24:45,238 --> 00:24:46,948
You should take it
while you're here.
558
00:24:46,948 --> 00:24:48,408
[puts keys down]
559
00:24:48,408 --> 00:24:50,576
I'm sorry we've taken over
your bedroom.
560
00:24:50,576 --> 00:24:52,787
Well, it's definitely not
my bedroom.
561
00:24:54,372 --> 00:24:56,457
And I've been staying here
less and less.
562
00:24:56,457 --> 00:25:00,086
- [uplifting music]
- [Dutch broadcast plays]
563
00:25:00,086 --> 00:25:01,921
[people converse indistinctly]
564
00:25:05,758 --> 00:25:07,510
[uplifting music continues]
565
00:25:07,510 --> 00:25:08,594
You think...
566
00:25:12,390 --> 00:25:14,934
- [baby gurgles]
- [Jim] Oh!
567
00:25:14,934 --> 00:25:18,104
It was convenient for a while,
but now not so much.
568
00:25:18,104 --> 00:25:20,189
Have you moved
closer to Amsterdam?
569
00:25:20,189 --> 00:25:23,776
No, no, it's just I need to
work when I'm in town
570
00:25:23,776 --> 00:25:26,279
and, you know, your father
takes up a lot of time.
571
00:25:26,279 --> 00:25:28,823
[chuckles]
He does demand attention.
572
00:25:28,823 --> 00:25:31,743
I've been wanting to talk
to him about it for a while.
573
00:25:31,743 --> 00:25:33,244
[Hannah] I see.
574
00:25:35,705 --> 00:25:37,498
He's still struggling.
575
00:25:37,498 --> 00:25:39,292
Emily said.
576
00:25:39,292 --> 00:25:40,960
Since your sister left,
577
00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:43,504
Richard's been doing
most of the heavy lifting.
578
00:25:43,504 --> 00:25:45,214
He has sent me a lot of articles
579
00:25:45,214 --> 00:25:46,591
and grant applications
580
00:25:46,591 --> 00:25:50,094
to finish off
and smooth out when I can.
581
00:25:50,094 --> 00:25:51,971
You shouldn't be
the one covering for him.
582
00:25:53,347 --> 00:25:55,475
I'm sorry none of us
have been here to help.
583
00:26:00,188 --> 00:26:02,356
You can stop looking after him.
584
00:26:03,399 --> 00:26:04,484
[Mirjam] Hmm.
585
00:26:08,154 --> 00:26:09,989
You sound like him.
586
00:26:09,989 --> 00:26:11,491
[Hannah chuckles]
587
00:26:14,535 --> 00:26:16,079
Over the years, he has taught me
588
00:26:16,079 --> 00:26:18,456
to need him
less and less, but...
589
00:26:19,624 --> 00:26:20,750
But he's still hurt
590
00:26:20,750 --> 00:26:22,126
that you're not around as much.
591
00:26:23,127 --> 00:26:25,004
[Mirjam] Hmm. Yeah.
592
00:26:26,172 --> 00:26:27,673
[Jim] Thank you, Matti.
593
00:26:27,673 --> 00:26:28,841
Hot, I hope.
594
00:26:28,841 --> 00:26:30,301
[Matti] if only you were hot.
595
00:26:30,301 --> 00:26:31,385
[laughs]
596
00:26:31,385 --> 00:26:32,762
You have to be careful
with steroids
597
00:26:32,762 --> 00:26:34,013
if you're taking warfarin.
598
00:26:34,013 --> 00:26:35,431
Why are you taking steroids?
599
00:26:35,431 --> 00:26:38,226
A date the other week
said I looked too skinny.
600
00:26:38,226 --> 00:26:39,560
- [Frances] A date?
- Yes!
601
00:26:39,560 --> 00:26:40,937
He means a hook-up.
602
00:26:40,937 --> 00:26:44,398
You've looked exactly the same
for 97 years, Mark.
603
00:26:44,398 --> 00:26:46,109
You've had no problem before.
604
00:26:46,109 --> 00:26:47,985
[all laugh]
605
00:26:47,985 --> 00:26:52,031
['Don't leave me this way'
by The Communards]
606
00:26:52,031 --> 00:26:53,574
[cheering]
607
00:26:57,203 --> 00:26:59,163
[shouts indistinctly]
608
00:27:11,259 --> 00:27:14,178
Whoo! [laughs]
609
00:27:15,263 --> 00:27:16,889
- [camera clicks]
- [all laugh]
610
00:27:16,889 --> 00:27:19,392
Steroids don't work on old men.
611
00:27:19,392 --> 00:27:21,269
I sense you've already tried.
612
00:27:21,269 --> 00:27:22,436
Of course.
613
00:27:22,436 --> 00:27:24,021
[others laugh]
614
00:27:24,021 --> 00:27:26,691
But what are you into, Frances?
615
00:27:26,691 --> 00:27:28,109
What can we help you with?
616
00:27:28,109 --> 00:27:29,861
Uh, 'into'?
617
00:27:29,902 --> 00:27:31,362
[softly] Are you a lesbian?
618
00:27:31,362 --> 00:27:32,947
Don't be so old.
619
00:27:32,947 --> 00:27:35,366
What? That's not
a bad question, is it?
620
00:27:35,366 --> 00:27:37,910
You can't be a lesbian
if you're not a woman.
621
00:27:37,910 --> 00:27:38,995
[Mark] Oh.
622
00:27:38,995 --> 00:27:41,497
I like women
and I'm also attracted to
623
00:27:41,497 --> 00:27:43,749
people who don't identify
as a gender either way
624
00:27:43,749 --> 00:27:45,293
but are a bit femme.
625
00:27:45,293 --> 00:27:47,086
I love how much your generation
626
00:27:47,086 --> 00:27:48,379
knows what they want.
627
00:27:48,379 --> 00:27:49,881
It doesn't sound like anything.
628
00:27:49,881 --> 00:27:52,675
It's not a preference,
it's a non-preference.
629
00:27:52,675 --> 00:27:53,759
So...
630
00:27:53,759 --> 00:27:55,178
...you don't like men.
631
00:27:55,178 --> 00:27:56,762
Cis men.
632
00:27:56,762 --> 00:27:57,972
Penis?
633
00:27:57,972 --> 00:27:59,640
I don't know.
634
00:27:59,640 --> 00:28:01,809
Jim, can we talk about
how unsatisfying
635
00:28:01,809 --> 00:28:03,519
getting your penis sucked
is now?
636
00:28:03,519 --> 00:28:04,645
[Dede] Oh, you too?
637
00:28:04,645 --> 00:28:06,230
I feel it's getting
lower and lower
638
00:28:06,230 --> 00:28:07,648
on my pleasure scale.
639
00:28:07,648 --> 00:28:10,026
That's because
you go straight for hole.
640
00:28:10,026 --> 00:28:12,445
Oh, you're right.
I do love ass too much.
641
00:28:12,486 --> 00:28:13,779
[all laugh]
642
00:28:13,779 --> 00:28:17,533
Frances has still not
stated a preference.
643
00:28:19,493 --> 00:28:22,788
Well, genitals aren't really
what attracts me to people.
644
00:28:22,788 --> 00:28:24,373
How are we talking
about genitals
645
00:28:24,373 --> 00:28:26,167
all of a sudden, anyway?
646
00:28:26,167 --> 00:28:27,919
Because you're talking to us.
647
00:28:27,919 --> 00:28:29,629
It's all for show, Frances.
648
00:28:29,629 --> 00:28:32,048
We mostly talk about
real estate now.
649
00:28:32,048 --> 00:28:34,008
In that regard, Amsterdam
has gotten much better.
650
00:28:34,008 --> 00:28:35,593
You're such a conservative.
651
00:28:35,593 --> 00:28:36,802
I'm just being encouraging
652
00:28:36,802 --> 00:28:38,888
towards Frances's idea
of moving here.
653
00:28:40,139 --> 00:28:42,016
[Jim] You know,
Amsterdam used to be about
654
00:28:42,016 --> 00:28:44,977
squatter protests and housing
rights, but the government's
655
00:28:44,977 --> 00:28:46,729
free-market push is a disgrace.
656
00:28:46,729 --> 00:28:48,564
[Mark sings]
♪ Don't leave me this way... ♪
657
00:28:48,564 --> 00:28:49,774
None of my students will be
658
00:28:49,774 --> 00:28:50,983
able to buy in their lifetimes.
659
00:28:50,983 --> 00:28:52,109
[Mark]♪ I can't survive... ♪
660
00:28:52,109 --> 00:28:53,611
[Jim] And the sale of
social housing
661
00:28:53,653 --> 00:28:54,904
has only increased the problem.
662
00:28:54,904 --> 00:28:57,698
Says the man who owns
one of those apartments.
663
00:28:57,698 --> 00:28:59,533
- Hmm!
- ♪ Oh, baby ♪
664
00:28:59,533 --> 00:29:03,663
♪ Don't leave me this way... ♪
665
00:29:03,663 --> 00:29:06,374
This is their way of getting
me to change the subject.
666
00:29:06,374 --> 00:29:08,167
[men sing]♪ I will surely miss
♪
667
00:29:08,167 --> 00:29:10,127
♪ Your tender kiss ♪
668
00:29:10,127 --> 00:29:12,797
♪ So don't leave me this way ♪
669
00:29:12,797 --> 00:29:16,008
♪ Oh, baby ♪
670
00:29:16,008 --> 00:29:19,011
♪ My heart is full of love
And desire for you ♪
671
00:29:19,011 --> 00:29:22,014
♪ So come on down and do
What you gotta do ♪
672
00:29:22,014 --> 00:29:25,393
♪ You started this fire
Down in my soul ♪
673
00:29:25,393 --> 00:29:26,936
♪ Now can't you see it's
Burning ♪
674
00:29:26,936 --> 00:29:28,521
- ♪ Out of control ♪
- ♪ Out of control ♪
675
00:29:28,521 --> 00:29:29,772
♪ Out of control... ♪
676
00:29:36,445 --> 00:29:39,448
A clean desk is
a sign of a sick mind.
677
00:29:39,448 --> 00:29:41,993
Sit anywhere you like.
I won't be long.
678
00:29:44,036 --> 00:29:45,413
[app chimes]
679
00:29:51,377 --> 00:29:52,503
[mouse clicks]
680
00:29:53,462 --> 00:29:55,339
[mutters indistinctly]
681
00:29:58,092 --> 00:30:01,345
[chill-out music]
682
00:30:05,474 --> 00:30:06,934
- [door thumps]
- Hello!
683
00:30:06,934 --> 00:30:07,935
Hi!
684
00:30:07,935 --> 00:30:09,228
[shouts] Who is it?
685
00:30:09,228 --> 00:30:10,479
[Hannah] It's me.
686
00:30:10,479 --> 00:30:13,107
You should say your name,
not just hello.
687
00:30:13,107 --> 00:30:15,693
Don't know who it is or
what you want, otherwise.
688
00:30:15,693 --> 00:30:17,778
You do like self-identifying,
you hypocrite.
689
00:30:17,778 --> 00:30:19,405
[Jim chuckles]
690
00:30:19,405 --> 00:30:21,115
Hello, it's me,
your daughter, Hannah.
691
00:30:21,115 --> 00:30:23,409
That's it? Just a daughter?
692
00:30:23,409 --> 00:30:28,247
And a filmmaker
and a mother and a woman.
693
00:30:28,247 --> 00:30:29,332
Is that better?
694
00:30:29,332 --> 00:30:30,708
Impressive.
695
00:30:32,001 --> 00:30:34,879
So Mirjam gave me her key today
696
00:30:34,879 --> 00:30:37,214
'cause someone didn't
leave one behind for me.
697
00:30:37,214 --> 00:30:38,924
Who else has a key
to the apartment?
698
00:30:38,924 --> 00:30:40,051
No-one.
699
00:30:40,051 --> 00:30:43,304
Like my body,
my home is my temple.
700
00:30:43,304 --> 00:30:45,806
And what happens
if you have another stroke?
701
00:30:45,806 --> 00:30:47,224
[laughs] Oh, god.
702
00:30:47,224 --> 00:30:49,101
If I have another stroke,
703
00:30:49,101 --> 00:30:51,479
even if you're here,
go out and have a coffee.
704
00:30:51,479 --> 00:30:52,813
Jimpa!
705
00:30:52,813 --> 00:30:54,231
No, I'm deadly serious.
706
00:30:54,231 --> 00:30:55,733
Let me die.
707
00:30:55,733 --> 00:30:58,027
A diminished life
is no life for me at all.
708
00:30:58,069 --> 00:30:59,487
A diminished life?
709
00:30:59,487 --> 00:31:00,821
That's a little bit ableist,
Jimpa.
710
00:31:02,156 --> 00:31:03,949
So, is that why
no-one else has a key?
711
00:31:03,949 --> 00:31:05,368
Well, of course.
712
00:31:05,368 --> 00:31:06,452
No-one.
713
00:31:06,452 --> 00:31:08,245
That's everyone
off the hook, then.
714
00:31:08,245 --> 00:31:10,956
No-one feels the need
to check up on me.
715
00:31:10,956 --> 00:31:13,959
And if you keep calling
and there's no answer,
716
00:31:13,959 --> 00:31:16,754
wait a week before
you break the door down.
717
00:31:16,754 --> 00:31:18,130
I should be dead by then.
718
00:31:18,130 --> 00:31:20,132
Richard has a key.
719
00:31:20,132 --> 00:31:21,967
Oh, yes, Richard has a key.
720
00:31:21,967 --> 00:31:23,803
And although my sister lives
in another country,
721
00:31:23,803 --> 00:31:25,221
I bet she still has a key.
722
00:31:25,221 --> 00:31:26,639
Well, of course Emily has a key.
723
00:31:26,639 --> 00:31:27,807
She lived here for three years
724
00:31:27,807 --> 00:31:29,683
while she looked after me
like an angel.
725
00:31:29,683 --> 00:31:30,935
[Frances] I should have a key.
726
00:31:30,935 --> 00:31:32,770
You most certainly
will need a key,
727
00:31:32,770 --> 00:31:34,063
if you're gonna live here.
728
00:31:34,063 --> 00:31:36,607
[Harry] Have you talked
about that, have you?
729
00:31:39,360 --> 00:31:42,988
Yeah, it was my idea, even
before Frances mentioned it.
730
00:31:42,988 --> 00:31:44,407
I was thinking she needed...
731
00:31:44,407 --> 00:31:45,699
They, Jim. They.
732
00:31:45,699 --> 00:31:48,327
...they needed to get out of
Adelaide
733
00:31:48,327 --> 00:31:50,204
before it suffocates them.
734
00:31:50,204 --> 00:31:53,124
I love Adelaide, by the way,
735
00:31:53,124 --> 00:31:56,001
and I'm very glad you made
something of yourself there
736
00:31:56,001 --> 00:31:57,336
when I wasn't able to.
737
00:31:57,336 --> 00:31:59,630
- Thank you.
- [Jim] Fucking miracle.
738
00:31:59,630 --> 00:32:01,882
[Jim continues
chopping vegetables]
739
00:32:04,718 --> 00:32:07,388
[Hannah] Yeah, it's an idea
that Frances just had.
740
00:32:07,388 --> 00:32:09,390
We haven't had a chance
to talk about it much.
741
00:32:09,390 --> 00:32:11,350
Even the small part of Amsterdam
742
00:32:11,350 --> 00:32:13,602
that I saw with Jimpa today
just felt so good.
743
00:32:13,602 --> 00:32:15,521
It feels like a proper city.
744
00:32:15,521 --> 00:32:18,065
[Jim] Hm. The timing
couldn't be more perfect.
745
00:32:18,065 --> 00:32:19,650
I... I think it's perfect.
746
00:32:19,650 --> 00:32:21,444
What do you think?
747
00:32:23,237 --> 00:32:25,030
I think Frances is too young.
748
00:32:25,030 --> 00:32:26,323
[Frances] For what?
749
00:32:27,241 --> 00:32:29,994
Well, Harry doesn't mean
'too young' exactly.
750
00:32:30,995 --> 00:32:32,746
I think what Harry means is
751
00:32:32,746 --> 00:32:35,708
that you're a child for such
a short amount of time
752
00:32:35,708 --> 00:32:38,878
and then there's so much life
that happens afterwards.
753
00:32:38,878 --> 00:32:41,797
But that time as a young
person, as a young family,
754
00:32:41,797 --> 00:32:44,008
is limited and then...
755
00:32:44,008 --> 00:32:46,802
...you know, then it's gone
and you can't get it back.
756
00:32:48,512 --> 00:32:52,224
But also Amsterdam is full of
people who've had to leave
757
00:32:52,224 --> 00:32:53,934
in order to survive
758
00:32:53,934 --> 00:32:56,979
or, you know,
find who they are or...
759
00:32:56,979 --> 00:32:59,565
Like, you know, my own father,
for instance.
760
00:32:59,565 --> 00:33:02,276
So who am I to say what...
what a person needs?
761
00:33:03,652 --> 00:33:05,946
[pot boils]
762
00:33:05,946 --> 00:33:08,657
Are you making your
pea and ham soup?
763
00:33:08,657 --> 00:33:10,075
[Jim chuckles] Yeah.
764
00:33:10,075 --> 00:33:12,077
Yeah, for a little gathering
we're having tomorrow.
765
00:33:12,077 --> 00:33:13,370
- Ham?
- [Hannah] Yeah.
766
00:33:13,370 --> 00:33:15,289
Dad used to make it for me
all the time.
767
00:33:15,289 --> 00:33:17,875
[Jim] Don't worry, I'll make
something for you vegans.
768
00:33:17,875 --> 00:33:19,502
[Hannah] Right,
I'll make something for us.
769
00:33:22,713 --> 00:33:28,719
[man sings]♪ Un bel di,
Vedremo ♪
770
00:33:29,762 --> 00:33:35,559
♪ Levarsi un fil di fumo ♪
771
00:33:37,645 --> 00:33:43,150
♪ Sull'estremo confin ♪
772
00:33:43,150 --> 00:33:47,655
♪ Del mare ♪
773
00:33:47,655 --> 00:33:50,866
♪ E poi ♪
774
00:33:50,866 --> 00:33:56,288
♪ La nave appare ♪
775
00:33:56,288 --> 00:34:01,001
♪ Chi sarà? Chi sarà? ♪
776
00:34:01,001 --> 00:34:04,463
♪ E come sarà giunto ♪
777
00:34:04,463 --> 00:34:09,760
♪ Che dirà? Che dirà? ♪
778
00:34:09,760 --> 00:34:14,473
♪ Chiamerà "Butterfly" ♪
779
00:34:14,473 --> 00:34:18,227
♪ Dalla lontana ♪
780
00:34:18,227 --> 00:34:21,981
♪ Lo senza dar risposta ♪
781
00:34:21,981 --> 00:34:25,025
♪ Me ne starò nascosta ♪
782
00:34:25,025 --> 00:34:28,487
♪ Un po' per celia ♪
783
00:34:28,487 --> 00:34:31,490
♪ E un po' ♪
784
00:34:31,490 --> 00:34:35,369
♪ Per non morire ♪
785
00:34:35,369 --> 00:34:37,538
♪ Al primo incontro... ♪
786
00:34:37,538 --> 00:34:39,540
[speaks Dutch and laughs]
787
00:34:39,540 --> 00:34:41,250
[both converse inaudibly]
788
00:34:41,250 --> 00:34:43,043
Dennis?
789
00:34:43,043 --> 00:34:45,629
I want you to meet
my grand-thing, Frances.
790
00:34:45,629 --> 00:34:47,965
You two should
sit down and talk.
791
00:34:47,965 --> 00:34:50,009
You know Dennis.
We used to be together.
792
00:34:50,009 --> 00:34:51,135
[Frances] Hi, Dennis.
793
00:34:51,135 --> 00:34:53,429
And your grandfather
is a huge cunt.
794
00:34:53,429 --> 00:34:55,139
[all chuckle]
795
00:34:55,139 --> 00:34:56,557
[Jim] And now we're
just good friends.
796
00:34:56,557 --> 00:34:58,392
[Dennis] Oh, the best,
best friends.
797
00:34:58,392 --> 00:34:59,810
- Let's chat later, OK?
- [Frances] Please, yeah.
798
00:34:59,810 --> 00:35:01,645
- [Dennis] Great.
- [Jim] Uh, everyone!
799
00:35:01,645 --> 00:35:03,147
Everyone!
800
00:35:03,147 --> 00:35:07,484
If you haven't met my
grand-thing, this is Frances.
801
00:35:07,484 --> 00:35:09,278
[guests] Hi, Frances!
802
00:35:09,278 --> 00:35:12,239
[Jim] I want you to introduce
yourself to them.
803
00:35:12,239 --> 00:35:15,075
Yes, Frances is one of
those young people
804
00:35:15,075 --> 00:35:20,581
who... suddenly has no gender,
for some reason.
805
00:35:20,581 --> 00:35:23,500
So please respect that.
806
00:35:23,500 --> 00:35:24,918
Uh, anyway,
807
00:35:24,918 --> 00:35:28,172
I know most of you
might be aware that my life
808
00:35:28,172 --> 00:35:31,175
is going through
a small transition right now.
809
00:35:31,175 --> 00:35:36,430
I am finishing up my work
at the university.
810
00:35:36,430 --> 00:35:39,266
- No, no. Boo!
- No, no, no, no.
811
00:35:39,266 --> 00:35:40,476
I know, I know.
812
00:35:40,476 --> 00:35:42,102
But it's time I moved on from...
813
00:35:42,102 --> 00:35:44,438
...some of you old farts
anyway.
814
00:35:44,438 --> 00:35:46,023
But... but don't worry -
815
00:35:46,023 --> 00:35:49,777
I'm not ready to sit behind
my geraniums just yet.
816
00:35:49,777 --> 00:35:53,238
In fact,
I've just been on a call
817
00:35:53,238 --> 00:35:56,909
with a certain organisation
in Helsinki
818
00:35:56,909 --> 00:35:58,827
about a job opportunity.
819
00:35:58,827 --> 00:36:03,248
Yes. That's in Finland,
boys and girls.
820
00:36:03,248 --> 00:36:05,918
So I just wanted you all
to be aware.
821
00:36:05,918 --> 00:36:07,461
They haven't made up
their minds.
822
00:36:07,461 --> 00:36:09,672
I haven't made up my mind.
823
00:36:09,672 --> 00:36:12,299
But I want to acquaint you
with the possibility...
824
00:36:12,299 --> 00:36:15,302
[Jim continues indistinctly]
825
00:36:20,224 --> 00:36:22,476
OK, so... OK, what do I do?
[laughs]
826
00:36:22,476 --> 00:36:24,728
Keep your body still
except for your arms.
827
00:36:24,728 --> 00:36:27,648
Uh-huh. OK, yeah.
Like I said, the arms.
828
00:36:27,648 --> 00:36:29,233
- Arms.
- And marching.
829
00:36:29,233 --> 00:36:31,610
- Marching, marching.
- [dance music plays]
830
00:36:31,610 --> 00:36:33,904
Make the arms, like,
intentional.
831
00:36:33,904 --> 00:36:36,156
Tiny steps. Uh-huh.
832
00:36:36,156 --> 00:36:38,617
And... no. [laughs]
833
00:36:38,617 --> 00:36:40,244
[laughs] What?
834
00:36:40,244 --> 00:36:42,246
- It has intention.
- OK, show me, show me.
835
00:36:42,246 --> 00:36:44,581
You don't have to go,
like, fast all the time.
836
00:36:44,581 --> 00:36:48,335
You can go slow, slow.
Slow, slow, slow.
837
00:36:49,336 --> 00:36:51,004
- Ba-ba-ba.
- [Richard] Hey!
838
00:36:51,004 --> 00:36:53,799
Soft. Soft. Soft.
839
00:36:53,799 --> 00:36:56,218
And... and do soft.
840
00:36:56,218 --> 00:36:58,220
[people laugh and clap]
841
00:36:58,220 --> 00:36:59,304
[camera clicks]
842
00:36:59,304 --> 00:37:00,681
- [laughs]
- Whoo-hoo!
843
00:37:01,974 --> 00:37:03,851
[door opens]
844
00:37:09,064 --> 00:37:10,607
[sighs]
845
00:37:19,533 --> 00:37:21,326
[sighs]
846
00:37:21,326 --> 00:37:23,328
[guests chatter nearby]
847
00:37:23,328 --> 00:37:24,413
I knew it.
848
00:37:25,998 --> 00:37:27,040
Hmm.
849
00:37:27,040 --> 00:37:29,293
Leading Frances on like that.
850
00:37:29,293 --> 00:37:30,836
Oh?
851
00:37:30,836 --> 00:37:33,422
Encouraging the idea of
them moving over
852
00:37:33,422 --> 00:37:35,340
and then the next minute saying
853
00:37:35,340 --> 00:37:37,468
you've got job opportunities
in another country.
854
00:37:37,468 --> 00:37:39,678
When did you organise that?
855
00:37:39,678 --> 00:37:41,513
Mirjam hadn't said anything.
856
00:37:41,513 --> 00:37:43,682
Oh, you've seen Mirjam?
857
00:37:43,682 --> 00:37:45,309
Yeah, she's at the party now.
858
00:37:45,309 --> 00:37:46,477
Is she?
859
00:37:46,477 --> 00:37:47,728
Yeah.
860
00:37:47,728 --> 00:37:49,563
And she gave me her key
yesterday, remember?
861
00:37:49,563 --> 00:37:51,940
Oh, yes.
862
00:37:51,940 --> 00:37:54,234
See, sometimes I don't know
if you've lost your memory
863
00:37:54,234 --> 00:37:55,861
or you just don't care
about these things.
864
00:37:55,903 --> 00:37:57,196
[chuckles]
865
00:37:57,196 --> 00:37:58,697
Come here.
866
00:38:00,240 --> 00:38:03,243
We haven't had
nearly enough cuddles yet.
867
00:38:03,243 --> 00:38:05,245
OLDER [Jim] Mmm!
868
00:38:06,955 --> 00:38:08,957
[Jim sighs]
869
00:38:08,957 --> 00:38:11,543
I'm sure it was just
a passing fancy.
870
00:38:12,836 --> 00:38:14,880
The excitement of
coming to see me.
871
00:38:16,924 --> 00:38:19,343
Are you taking a new job
in a new country?
872
00:38:21,386 --> 00:38:22,721
Shouldn't I?
873
00:38:22,721 --> 00:38:24,807
Why don't you retire and just...
874
00:38:24,807 --> 00:38:26,058
And be an old man?
875
00:38:26,058 --> 00:38:28,268
- Water my geraniums?
- Yeah, why not?
876
00:38:28,268 --> 00:38:30,145
Because there's so much
to fight for.
877
00:38:30,145 --> 00:38:32,397
Because work is everything.
878
00:38:32,397 --> 00:38:33,899
Oh, it isn't everything.
879
00:38:33,899 --> 00:38:36,443
Oh, look who's talking.
880
00:38:38,153 --> 00:38:40,447
We need to feel useful,
881
00:38:40,447 --> 00:38:42,574
the two of us, hmm?
882
00:38:42,574 --> 00:38:43,784
[Hannah] Mmm.
883
00:38:43,784 --> 00:38:46,578
- [Dylan] Mm-hm! Mademoiselle!
- [laughter]
884
00:38:46,578 --> 00:38:48,288
Hmm. OK.
885
00:38:48,288 --> 00:38:50,374
But Professor Jim
said to me that
886
00:38:50,374 --> 00:38:52,709
teenagers can't be
into polyamory.
887
00:38:52,709 --> 00:38:54,253
They just like to cheat.
888
00:38:54,253 --> 00:38:56,505
[laughs] Jim's never been
monogamous in his life.
889
00:38:56,505 --> 00:38:57,589
[teens chuckle]
890
00:38:57,589 --> 00:38:59,508
Also, non-monogamous
is so different
891
00:38:59,508 --> 00:39:00,551
from polyamorous.
892
00:39:00,551 --> 00:39:01,593
[Isa] True.
893
00:39:01,593 --> 00:39:03,887
Well, I'm still
working that out.
894
00:39:03,887 --> 00:39:05,180
[all laugh]
895
00:39:05,180 --> 00:39:07,558
We know, baby, we know.
896
00:39:07,558 --> 00:39:08,642
[Dylan] We know.
897
00:39:08,642 --> 00:39:10,978
[laughter]
898
00:39:10,978 --> 00:39:12,604
I'm definitely into polyamory.
899
00:39:12,604 --> 00:39:14,439
I'm a big believer
in compersion.
900
00:39:16,441 --> 00:39:18,652
Oh, my God! I love you.
901
00:39:18,652 --> 00:39:20,988
I love you too!
902
00:39:20,988 --> 00:39:22,322
[chuckles]
903
00:39:22,322 --> 00:39:25,033
[Richard] So, what do we think?
904
00:39:25,033 --> 00:39:26,618
- [Dylan] Wow!
- Cute!
905
00:39:26,618 --> 00:39:28,161
[Dylan] it looks cute on you.
906
00:39:28,161 --> 00:39:29,329
- Oooh!
- It's cute.
907
00:39:29,329 --> 00:39:30,789
[Richard] Thank you.
908
00:39:30,789 --> 00:39:33,333
Frances certainly doesn't
see you as useless.
909
00:39:33,333 --> 00:39:36,712
I thought you didn't want
Frances to move over here.
910
00:39:37,629 --> 00:39:40,048
Well, it's not up to me
to tell them what to do.
911
00:39:40,048 --> 00:39:41,341
I want to support Frances.
912
00:39:41,341 --> 00:39:42,634
Well, so do I.
913
00:39:42,634 --> 00:39:44,094
[phone buzzes]
914
00:39:45,637 --> 00:39:47,681
- Ah!
- [chuckles]
915
00:39:50,934 --> 00:39:52,311
Hey, where are you?
916
00:39:52,311 --> 00:39:54,271
[Frances]
I'm standing in the hallway.
917
00:39:54,271 --> 00:39:55,647
OK.
918
00:39:55,647 --> 00:39:58,275
Um, can I go out with Isa?
919
00:39:58,275 --> 00:40:00,360
She's a friend of Richard,
she's 19
920
00:40:00,360 --> 00:40:02,571
and she likes that
I know about compersion.
921
00:40:02,571 --> 00:40:04,907
- [Hannah] What's compersion?
- Compersion.
922
00:40:04,907 --> 00:40:06,617
[Frances]
It's taking pleasure in
923
00:40:06,617 --> 00:40:08,869
witnessing someone else's
pleasure
924
00:40:08,869 --> 00:40:10,829
but not related to you.
925
00:40:10,829 --> 00:40:12,915
It's a polyamory thing.
926
00:40:12,915 --> 00:40:14,207
OK.
927
00:40:14,207 --> 00:40:17,002
'OK' I can go out
with Isa, 'OK'?
928
00:40:17,002 --> 00:40:18,503
She's 19.
929
00:40:18,503 --> 00:40:19,755
Well, does Richard have
930
00:40:19,755 --> 00:40:21,465
this 19-year-old Isa's
phone number?
931
00:40:21,465 --> 00:40:22,883
I got her number.
932
00:40:22,883 --> 00:40:25,344
- She's spunky, Hannah.
- Spunky? Ugh.
933
00:40:26,511 --> 00:40:27,888
Have fun, Frances,
934
00:40:27,888 --> 00:40:30,057
and don't come back till
you've got a story to tell.
935
00:40:30,057 --> 00:40:31,892
- Thank you, Jimpa.
- [chuckles]
936
00:40:34,311 --> 00:40:35,687
[Jim] She's hot.
937
00:40:36,939 --> 00:40:38,273
And smart.
938
00:40:39,441 --> 00:40:41,109
And very nice.
939
00:40:43,362 --> 00:40:44,863
You set this up.
940
00:40:44,863 --> 00:40:46,740
Frances is 16!
941
00:40:46,740 --> 00:40:48,659
I remember you at 16.
942
00:40:48,659 --> 00:40:50,160
Yeah, but you do realise
943
00:40:50,160 --> 00:40:51,411
Frances has no experience
whatsoever?
944
00:40:51,411 --> 00:40:52,955
Really?
945
00:40:52,955 --> 00:40:54,998
Yeah, it's like they know
the lyrics to the song
946
00:40:54,998 --> 00:40:56,416
but they've never
sung it out loud.
947
00:40:57,501 --> 00:40:59,586
You don't know if you can sing
948
00:40:59,586 --> 00:41:01,338
until you sing.
949
00:41:02,506 --> 00:41:03,882
Hmm.
950
00:41:04,841 --> 00:41:06,760
Are you ready to see Amsterdam?
951
00:41:06,760 --> 00:41:08,553
- Yeah!
- [Isa laughs]
952
00:41:08,553 --> 00:41:11,723
[dance music plays]
953
00:41:14,267 --> 00:41:17,729
Here you can go... I think
it's open 24 hours, so...
954
00:41:17,729 --> 00:41:19,606
[friends sing]♪ Young hearts ♪
955
00:41:19,606 --> 00:41:21,441
♪ Run free ♪
956
00:41:21,441 --> 00:41:23,819
♪ Never be hung up ♪
957
00:41:23,819 --> 00:41:28,031
♪ Hung up like
My man and me... ♪
958
00:41:29,700 --> 00:41:31,076
You don't sing?
959
00:41:31,076 --> 00:41:32,786
Oh, no, I love to sing.
960
00:41:32,786 --> 00:41:34,371
[laughs] You're cute.
961
00:41:34,371 --> 00:41:35,872
♪ Ooh, young hearts... ♪
962
00:41:35,872 --> 00:41:37,541
[Dylan] To the lesbian bar!
963
00:41:37,541 --> 00:41:39,042
[Isa] Yes, let's go!
964
00:41:39,042 --> 00:41:40,711
[country music plays]
965
00:41:40,711 --> 00:41:42,462
[Frances] I'm definitely
not a woman,
966
00:41:42,462 --> 00:41:44,131
but I'm still into women.
967
00:41:44,131 --> 00:41:45,799
Is it OK that I'm here?
968
00:41:47,884 --> 00:41:49,761
- Roosje.
- Mmm?
969
00:41:49,761 --> 00:41:50,971
[Isa] This is Frances.
970
00:41:50,971 --> 00:41:52,848
They're non-binary.
Are they welcome here?
971
00:41:52,848 --> 00:41:54,891
- Oh, fuck, yes.
- Yes.
972
00:41:54,891 --> 00:41:56,852
- [all] Cheers!
- Ah, ja, ja, ja.
973
00:41:56,852 --> 00:41:59,021
- [others speak indistinctly]
- [Bis] She knows her shit.
974
00:42:01,356 --> 00:42:04,860
So you and Bis are... something?
975
00:42:06,695 --> 00:42:08,947
[Isa] We've been together
since high school.
976
00:42:11,074 --> 00:42:12,909
Since before he transitioned.
977
00:42:12,909 --> 00:42:15,704
And I like his new,
uh, qualities.
978
00:42:15,704 --> 00:42:16,913
His more masc energy.
979
00:42:16,913 --> 00:42:19,374
- What?
- [laughs]
980
00:42:19,374 --> 00:42:20,500
[laughs]
981
00:42:20,500 --> 00:42:21,835
And... and you two are...
982
00:42:21,835 --> 00:42:23,253
are monogamous or...
983
00:42:25,464 --> 00:42:27,632
[electronic dance music pumps]
984
00:42:27,632 --> 00:42:29,342
[Isa] That's what's great
about being queer, right?
985
00:42:29,342 --> 00:42:31,219
How we state things -
986
00:42:31,219 --> 00:42:33,180
by what our boundaries are,
987
00:42:33,180 --> 00:42:34,556
by what we want.
988
00:42:35,640 --> 00:42:36,933
Yeah.
989
00:42:36,933 --> 00:42:39,144
I want you, Isa.
990
00:42:39,144 --> 00:42:40,562
Exactly.
991
00:42:42,022 --> 00:42:43,273
For example.
992
00:42:44,691 --> 00:42:45,859
Exactly.
993
00:42:45,859 --> 00:42:47,360
Right.
994
00:42:49,654 --> 00:42:51,615
[crockery clatters]
995
00:42:52,991 --> 00:42:54,910
- You're still cleaning up!
- [water splashes]
996
00:42:54,910 --> 00:42:57,120
[scrubbing dishes]
You're still cleaning up too.
997
00:42:57,120 --> 00:42:58,371
[glasses clink]
998
00:42:59,456 --> 00:43:01,374
[water splashes]
999
00:43:07,547 --> 00:43:09,800
[Hannah] You didn't want
to go out with the others?
1000
00:43:10,884 --> 00:43:12,135
Not really.
1001
00:43:12,135 --> 00:43:13,512
You?
1002
00:43:14,638 --> 00:43:15,680
[Richard] No.
1003
00:43:15,680 --> 00:43:17,641
Well,
1004
00:43:17,641 --> 00:43:20,352
if you're gonna stay up
like an anxious mother...
1005
00:43:21,603 --> 00:43:22,854
...you can have another drink.
1006
00:43:24,106 --> 00:43:25,774
'Anxious mother' sounds old.
1007
00:43:25,774 --> 00:43:27,359
[Richard] Not old.
1008
00:43:27,359 --> 00:43:28,777
Older.
1009
00:43:28,777 --> 00:43:31,571
Aren't you, like, 10 years
older than me?
1010
00:43:31,571 --> 00:43:33,031
- 12.
- Nothing!
1011
00:43:33,031 --> 00:43:34,032
[lid pops]
1012
00:43:55,262 --> 00:43:57,097
No lovers waiting for you, then?
1013
00:44:00,976 --> 00:44:02,894
Just a few boys here and there.
1014
00:44:05,480 --> 00:44:06,565
[glasses clink]
1015
00:44:20,287 --> 00:44:22,372
[muffled dance music thuds]
1016
00:44:22,372 --> 00:44:24,040
How about you sing me a song?
1017
00:44:28,253 --> 00:44:29,546
What?
1018
00:44:30,714 --> 00:44:31,840
Come on!
1019
00:44:34,301 --> 00:44:35,385
Please.
1020
00:44:43,435 --> 00:44:46,438
[sings]♪ I wanna see you ♪
1021
00:44:48,773 --> 00:44:51,693
♪ Dressed all in white... ♪
1022
00:44:51,693 --> 00:44:53,945
[dance music fades]
1023
00:44:53,987 --> 00:44:57,574
♪ You're the queen
Of my living room ♪
1024
00:44:57,574 --> 00:45:01,077
♪ Sit by the window and smoke ♪
1025
00:45:01,077 --> 00:45:03,955
♪ Like you're saving a life ♪
1026
00:45:06,208 --> 00:45:09,377
♪ And I wanna dance ♪
1027
00:45:11,671 --> 00:45:14,758
♪ Your hands on mine ♪
1028
00:45:17,427 --> 00:45:20,889
♪ I'm the queen of
This crowded room ♪
1029
00:45:20,889 --> 00:45:24,184
♪ Wanna be next to you ♪
1030
00:45:24,184 --> 00:45:28,313
♪ Tell me one drink at a time ♪
1031
00:45:30,899 --> 00:45:34,527
♪ And it's all my fault ♪
1032
00:45:34,527 --> 00:45:36,863
♪ I know ♪
1033
00:45:36,863 --> 00:45:39,950
♪ I wanna be yours ♪
1034
00:45:39,950 --> 00:45:42,619
♪ For sure ♪
1035
00:45:42,619 --> 00:45:45,538
♪ I'm trying my best ♪
1036
00:45:45,538 --> 00:45:48,375
♪ For you ♪
1037
00:45:49,501 --> 00:45:50,794
♪ For you ♪
1038
00:45:53,546 --> 00:45:56,675
♪ And I wanna be good... ♪
1039
00:45:56,675 --> 00:45:58,218
[breathes steadily]
1040
00:45:58,218 --> 00:46:01,554
♪ But it's gonna take time ♪
1041
00:46:04,474 --> 00:46:07,477
♪ So steal all my cigarettes ♪
1042
00:46:07,477 --> 00:46:10,981
♪ Tell me that I'm the best ♪
1043
00:46:10,981 --> 00:46:13,984
♪ Everything's
Gonna be fine... ♪
1044
00:46:15,485 --> 00:46:18,446
[whispers] What do you know
about compersion?
1045
00:46:23,868 --> 00:46:26,037
[Harry] It's the opposite
to jealousy.
1046
00:46:27,414 --> 00:46:29,374
It's a polyamory thing.
1047
00:46:31,167 --> 00:46:32,919
How do you know about it?
1048
00:46:34,212 --> 00:46:35,380
[Harry sighs]
1049
00:46:36,589 --> 00:46:38,633
It's just wanting
someone you love
1050
00:46:38,633 --> 00:46:40,385
to be happy and fulfilled.
1051
00:46:42,012 --> 00:46:43,638
It's a nice idea.
1052
00:46:52,272 --> 00:46:55,692
[Frances]
♪ And it's all my fault ♪
1053
00:46:55,692 --> 00:46:58,403
♪ I know ♪
1054
00:46:58,403 --> 00:47:02,365
♪ I wanna be yours... ♪
1055
00:47:02,365 --> 00:47:05,410
- [footsteps approach]
- ♪ For sure ♪
1056
00:47:05,410 --> 00:47:08,788
♪ I'm trying my best ♪
1057
00:47:08,788 --> 00:47:11,791
♪ For you ♪
1058
00:47:12,959 --> 00:47:16,880
♪ For you ♪
1059
00:47:19,758 --> 00:47:21,718
Were you pretending to sleep?
1060
00:47:23,386 --> 00:47:25,597
No, I think I was
trying to sleep.
1061
00:47:28,058 --> 00:47:29,351
Did you have fun?
1062
00:47:31,936 --> 00:47:34,064
- I had the best time, Mum.
- Oh!
1063
00:47:34,064 --> 00:47:36,399
- [giggles]
- Yay, I'm so glad.
1064
00:47:37,567 --> 00:47:39,069
So you liked Isa?
1065
00:47:40,362 --> 00:47:41,988
I'm in love.
1066
00:47:41,988 --> 00:47:44,032
[both laugh]
1067
00:47:46,618 --> 00:47:48,411
Guys.
1068
00:47:48,411 --> 00:47:50,163
But I'm in love, Dad.
1069
00:47:50,163 --> 00:47:52,165
- [Harry] Yeah, great.
- Oh!
1070
00:47:52,165 --> 00:47:55,627
- [Harry] Oh, don't!
- [Hannah and Frances laugh]
1071
00:48:02,217 --> 00:48:03,551
- [Matti] There you go.
- Thank you.
1072
00:48:03,551 --> 00:48:04,761
Tell us about your film.
1073
00:48:04,761 --> 00:48:06,388
Thank you, Matti. Hot, I hope.
1074
00:48:06,388 --> 00:48:08,598
It's impossible for it
to be any hotter, Jim.
1075
00:48:08,598 --> 00:48:10,266
Yes, you haven't told us
about your film yet.
1076
00:48:10,266 --> 00:48:12,018
I'm just trying to cast it
right now.
1077
00:48:12,018 --> 00:48:14,896
Why don't you just put your
mouth under the machine, Jim?
1078
00:48:14,896 --> 00:48:16,856
- [Hannah laughs]
- [Uri] Your film?
1079
00:48:16,856 --> 00:48:19,442
Hannah hasn't told me a thing
about it. She's avoiding it.
1080
00:48:19,442 --> 00:48:20,485
[Mark] Why?
1081
00:48:20,485 --> 00:48:22,320
So she's bisexual?
1082
00:48:22,362 --> 00:48:23,446
Who?
1083
00:48:23,488 --> 00:48:24,739
Isa, the student.
1084
00:48:24,739 --> 00:48:27,325
There's no such thing
as bisexuality.
1085
00:48:27,325 --> 00:48:29,869
- [Dede] Oh!
- OK, maybe tone it down a bit.
1086
00:48:29,869 --> 00:48:31,413
Tone what down?
1087
00:48:31,413 --> 00:48:33,665
What? I'm just trying to talk
about these things openly.
1088
00:48:33,665 --> 00:48:35,291
Are you sure you talking openly
1089
00:48:35,291 --> 00:48:37,669
isn't just you wanting to
express your opinion?
1090
00:48:37,669 --> 00:48:39,671
So, what is a conversation
1091
00:48:39,671 --> 00:48:41,339
except a collision of opinions?
1092
00:48:41,339 --> 00:48:44,467
Uh, a conversation can also be
working towards agreement.
1093
00:48:44,467 --> 00:48:46,428
Says the only straight person
at the table.
1094
00:48:46,428 --> 00:48:47,512
[all chuckle]
1095
00:48:47,512 --> 00:48:49,180
Yeah, but, you know,
it's more complex
1096
00:48:49,180 --> 00:48:50,807
than you are making it out to be
1097
00:48:50,807 --> 00:48:52,809
because you have actually
been in love with women.
1098
00:48:53,852 --> 00:48:55,520
My mother, for instance.
1099
00:48:55,520 --> 00:48:56,855
Is...
1100
00:48:56,855 --> 00:48:58,648
Is that what your film is about?
1101
00:48:58,648 --> 00:49:00,775
About what?
1102
00:49:00,775 --> 00:49:02,735
Me and your mother?
1103
00:49:02,735 --> 00:49:03,862
Not exactly.
1104
00:49:08,366 --> 00:49:11,661
If you say you're bi,
you're just confused.
1105
00:49:11,661 --> 00:49:13,705
If you're attracted to
the same sex, you're gay.
1106
00:49:13,705 --> 00:49:14,998
It's as simple as that.
1107
00:49:14,998 --> 00:49:16,875
If you say otherwise,
you're in denial.
1108
00:49:16,875 --> 00:49:19,502
- [Uri] Here we go.
- I never said Isa was bi.
1109
00:49:19,502 --> 00:49:21,713
You know how many men
have said to me
1110
00:49:21,713 --> 00:49:24,215
that they're straight
while sucking my cock?
1111
00:49:24,215 --> 00:49:27,093
You can't be straight
with a dash of gayness.
1112
00:49:27,093 --> 00:49:29,012
He's just being provocative
for the sake of it.
1113
00:49:29,012 --> 00:49:30,054
- [Frances] Mmm.
- Ignore him.
1114
00:49:30,054 --> 00:49:31,598
No, I once heard someone say
1115
00:49:31,598 --> 00:49:33,308
that they're 'mostly straight'.
1116
00:49:33,308 --> 00:49:35,101
Now, what the hell
does that mean?
1117
00:49:35,101 --> 00:49:36,769
They're just cowards.
1118
00:49:36,769 --> 00:49:40,064
So, Isa's a lesbian.
What's wrong with that?
1119
00:49:40,064 --> 00:49:41,191
Well, it's not useful...
1120
00:49:41,191 --> 00:49:42,525
"Not useful"?
1121
00:49:42,525 --> 00:49:44,903
Dad, maybe just let
Frances speak.
1122
00:49:45,904 --> 00:49:47,197
[Frances] Well, you know...
1123
00:49:47,197 --> 00:49:48,823
Are you worried that
Frances has had sex
1124
00:49:48,823 --> 00:49:50,950
with a 19-year-old lesbian?
1125
00:49:50,950 --> 00:49:53,119
- Uh, I haven't had sex.
- I'm not worried.
1126
00:49:53,119 --> 00:49:55,038
And don't put words in my mouth.
1127
00:49:55,038 --> 00:49:56,539
[laughs] I'm not.
1128
00:49:58,166 --> 00:50:00,335
It's fine if that's
what they want.
1129
00:50:00,335 --> 00:50:02,962
And by 'they', do you mean
plural or singular?
1130
00:50:02,962 --> 00:50:05,965
Because only one of them
is a consenting adult,
1131
00:50:06,007 --> 00:50:08,968
so only one of they
is able to consent.
1132
00:50:08,968 --> 00:50:10,929
And I think that's the lesbian.
1133
00:50:10,929 --> 00:50:13,723
[Hannah] It's not my place
to tell Frances what to do.
1134
00:50:13,723 --> 00:50:14,974
[Jim] Well, that's nonsense.
1135
00:50:14,974 --> 00:50:16,935
I tell you what to do
all the time
1136
00:50:16,935 --> 00:50:19,395
and whether or not
you wanna do it is up to you.
1137
00:50:19,395 --> 00:50:21,272
So, about this lesbian.
1138
00:50:21,272 --> 00:50:22,941
She's not a lesbian.
She's queer.
1139
00:50:22,941 --> 00:50:25,276
- [Uri] Shhh!
- [men groan]
1140
00:50:25,276 --> 00:50:27,904
- See? There's that word again.
- What, queer?
1141
00:50:27,946 --> 00:50:30,114
- Queer.
- Here we go.
1142
00:50:30,114 --> 00:50:31,658
This is the exact same
conversation
1143
00:50:31,658 --> 00:50:33,576
we've been having for
the past 30 years.
1144
00:50:33,576 --> 00:50:35,995
[speaks Dutch]
1145
00:50:35,995 --> 00:50:38,289
Dear, you might be queer.
1146
00:50:38,289 --> 00:50:39,874
- But I'm gay.
- [Jim] Yes.
1147
00:50:39,874 --> 00:50:43,211
And I've spent my whole life
fighting for it
1148
00:50:43,211 --> 00:50:47,507
as... as a visible, gay,
HIV-positive man.
1149
00:50:47,507 --> 00:50:49,300
Because someone had to.
1150
00:50:49,300 --> 00:50:51,511
- We all have.
- Yeah, we all have.
1151
00:50:51,511 --> 00:50:53,137
- I understand that, but...
- [Hannah] Yeah, that's true.
1152
00:50:53,137 --> 00:50:54,472
We haven't lived through that.
1153
00:50:54,472 --> 00:50:55,932
Mum.
1154
00:50:55,932 --> 00:50:57,642
I think what
Dad's trying to say is...
1155
00:50:57,642 --> 00:50:59,394
No, no, what I'm
trying to say is
1156
00:50:59,394 --> 00:51:00,895
if Frances wants to fuck
1157
00:51:00,895 --> 00:51:03,398
a hot 19-year-old
who calls themselves
1158
00:51:03,398 --> 00:51:06,234
Greenpeace Rainbow
Warrior Princess,
1159
00:51:06,234 --> 00:51:07,402
they can do it,
1160
00:51:07,402 --> 00:51:09,279
but calling everyone bisexual
1161
00:51:09,320 --> 00:51:12,407
negates the rights that I have
demanded and fought for.
1162
00:51:12,407 --> 00:51:14,200
[Mark] Yes, it's like
we had to fight
1163
00:51:14,200 --> 00:51:15,410
so hard for same-sex rights -
1164
00:51:15,410 --> 00:51:17,036
things Frances
doesn't have to deal with.
1165
00:51:17,036 --> 00:51:19,622
[Uri] But that's a good thing,
isn't it?
1166
00:51:21,040 --> 00:51:24,627
- [door closes]
- [footsteps approach]
1167
00:51:24,627 --> 00:51:25,837
[Hannah] Hey.
1168
00:51:26,796 --> 00:51:28,464
Hey!
1169
00:51:28,464 --> 00:51:29,966
You know, walking out like that
1170
00:51:29,966 --> 00:51:32,218
could be seen as quite hostile.
1171
00:51:33,428 --> 00:51:36,014
Don't be too disappointed.
They're all still hurting.
1172
00:51:36,014 --> 00:51:38,766
Oh, by 'they', do you mean
singular or plural?
1173
00:51:38,766 --> 00:51:40,768
'Cause you're just being
wilfully confusing.
1174
00:51:40,768 --> 00:51:42,186
I know.
1175
00:51:42,186 --> 00:51:43,730
[sighs]
1176
00:51:43,730 --> 00:51:44,897
Jimpa is...
1177
00:51:44,897 --> 00:51:45,982
He's so determined
1178
00:51:45,982 --> 00:51:47,692
to say that Isa
has to be a lesbian.
1179
00:51:47,692 --> 00:51:50,570
But for him, 'lesbian' means
attracted to women, right?
1180
00:51:50,570 --> 00:51:52,655
And I'm not a woman, Mum.
1181
00:51:52,655 --> 00:51:54,532
Then why didn't you point
that out to Jimpa?
1182
00:51:54,532 --> 00:51:56,284
Do you know
how much easier it is
1183
00:51:56,284 --> 00:51:57,994
for you to do it than for me?
1184
00:51:57,994 --> 00:51:59,454
Do what?
1185
00:52:00,997 --> 00:52:03,916
To stand up for me.
1186
00:52:03,916 --> 00:52:05,918
You don't think
I stand up for you?
1187
00:52:05,918 --> 00:52:07,545
[sighs]
1188
00:52:07,545 --> 00:52:09,756
Well, this is what he's like.
1189
00:52:09,756 --> 00:52:11,424
How are you gonna do this
when I'm not here?
1190
00:52:11,424 --> 00:52:13,885
[phone buzzes]
1191
00:52:15,887 --> 00:52:17,847
- It's Isa.
- Go ahead, answer it.
1192
00:52:20,850 --> 00:52:22,143
Oh, hi there.
1193
00:52:22,143 --> 00:52:24,771
[Isa] Where are you
and what are you doing?
1194
00:52:26,022 --> 00:52:29,067
Oh, nowhere interesting.
Doing nothing much.
1195
00:52:29,067 --> 00:52:32,904
[Isa] I doubt that,
but I was wondering
1196
00:52:32,945 --> 00:52:34,989
if you wanted to go for a ride
with me.
1197
00:52:36,199 --> 00:52:39,243
If you need to ask your mom
or Jim, that's cool.
1198
00:52:39,243 --> 00:52:40,995
[Frances]
No, I don't need to do that.
1199
00:52:58,513 --> 00:52:59,597
[Isa groans]
1200
00:53:02,558 --> 00:53:04,560
Australians are
afraid of the sun.
1201
00:53:06,020 --> 00:53:07,271
[Isa chuckles]
1202
00:53:12,402 --> 00:53:13,861
What's over there?
1203
00:53:15,780 --> 00:53:17,448
- [Isa] There?
- [Frances] Mmm.
1204
00:53:18,449 --> 00:53:21,661
It's a big cruising spot. 24/7.
1205
00:53:21,661 --> 00:53:24,122
Oh, is that why
you brought me here?
1206
00:53:24,122 --> 00:53:26,165
Do you want to go take a look?
1207
00:53:27,500 --> 00:53:28,835
- Uh...
- [Isa chuckles]
1208
00:53:33,548 --> 00:53:35,133
Did you wanna
talk anything through?
1209
00:53:37,176 --> 00:53:39,345
I think I'm
a bit sick of talking.
1210
00:53:39,345 --> 00:53:40,722
- Is that OK?
- [Isa chuckles]
1211
00:53:41,848 --> 00:53:42,890
Of course.
1212
00:53:45,059 --> 00:53:47,812
[whimsical song intro]
1213
00:53:55,987 --> 00:53:58,364
[song]♪ I wrote me a book ♪
1214
00:53:58,364 --> 00:54:00,783
♪ I hid the last page ♪
1215
00:54:00,783 --> 00:54:03,119
♪ I didn't even look ♪
1216
00:54:03,119 --> 00:54:05,538
♪ I think I locked it in a cage
♪
1217
00:54:05,538 --> 00:54:08,583
♪ Wrote a novel ♪
1218
00:54:08,583 --> 00:54:12,712
♪ 'Cause everybody
Likes to read a novel ♪
1219
00:54:16,048 --> 00:54:18,426
♪ I ♪
1220
00:54:18,426 --> 00:54:23,222
♪ Found the last page in the
Sky ♪
1221
00:54:23,222 --> 00:54:27,101
♪ Cold and sweet, like an apple
♪
1222
00:54:27,101 --> 00:54:28,603
♪ The end, the end ♪
1223
00:54:28,770 --> 00:54:33,232
♪ I found you and now
The story has its proper end ♪
1224
00:54:33,232 --> 00:54:35,985
♪ The end, the end What then ♪
1225
00:54:35,985 --> 00:54:37,695
♪ Oh, hello ♪
1226
00:54:37,737 --> 00:54:39,781
♪ Will you be mine ♪
1227
00:54:39,781 --> 00:54:43,159
♪ I haven't felt this alive
In a long time ♪
1228
00:54:44,160 --> 00:54:47,538
♪ All the streets are warm
Today ♪
1229
00:54:47,538 --> 00:54:50,583
♪ Hey ♪
1230
00:54:50,583 --> 00:54:52,794
♪ I read the signs ♪
1231
00:54:52,794 --> 00:54:56,881
♪ I haven't been this in love
In a long time ♪
1232
00:54:56,881 --> 00:55:01,010
♪ The sun is up,
The sun will stay ♪
1233
00:55:01,010 --> 00:55:04,597
♪ All for the new day ♪
1234
00:55:09,268 --> 00:55:11,771
♪ The very last breath ♪
1235
00:55:11,771 --> 00:55:13,815
♪ Of the hero of our tale ♪
1236
00:55:13,815 --> 00:55:16,609
♪ Would leave you only to guess
♪
1237
00:55:16,609 --> 00:55:22,281
♪ Did he truly prevail
In the sequel ♪
1238
00:55:22,281 --> 00:55:25,785
♪ I guess I'll have to
Write a sequel ♪
1239
00:55:42,093 --> 00:55:43,678
♪ Oh, hello ♪
1240
00:55:43,678 --> 00:55:45,096
♪ Will you be mine ♪
1241
00:55:46,097 --> 00:55:50,059
♪ I haven't felt this alive
In a long time ♪
1242
00:55:50,059 --> 00:55:53,729
♪ All the streets
Are warm and grey ♪
1243
00:55:53,729 --> 00:55:56,566
♪ Hey ♪
1244
00:55:56,566 --> 00:55:58,943
♪ I read the signs ♪
1245
00:55:58,943 --> 00:56:03,072
♪ I haven't been this in love
In a long time ♪
1246
00:56:03,072 --> 00:56:06,868
♪ The sun is up,
The sun will stay ♪
1247
00:56:06,868 --> 00:56:09,996
♪ All for the new day ♪
1248
00:56:09,996 --> 00:56:12,665
- ♪ Will you be mine ♪
- ♪ Will you be mine ♪
1249
00:56:12,665 --> 00:56:16,586
♪ The days are short
And I wrote me my last rhyme ♪
1250
00:56:16,586 --> 00:56:20,423
♪ All the streets are warm
Today ♪
1251
00:56:20,423 --> 00:56:23,092
- ♪ Hey ♪
- ♪ Hey ♪
1252
00:56:23,092 --> 00:56:25,636
♪ I read the signs ♪
1253
00:56:25,636 --> 00:56:30,182
♪ I haven't been this in love ♪
1254
00:56:30,182 --> 00:56:35,855
♪ In a long time ♪
1255
00:56:40,318 --> 00:56:45,615
♪ It's been a long time ♪
1256
00:56:56,792 --> 00:56:58,586
No, I tried that. [stammers]
1257
00:56:58,586 --> 00:57:00,046
It's not working.
1258
00:57:00,046 --> 00:57:01,464
It says I have two more attempts
1259
00:57:01,464 --> 00:57:02,757
before it locks me out.
1260
00:57:08,387 --> 00:57:09,639
[camera clicks]
1261
00:57:10,848 --> 00:57:12,725
[magpies sing]
1262
00:57:17,897 --> 00:57:19,815
My grand-thing
1263
00:57:19,815 --> 00:57:21,943
has done a grand thing.
1264
00:57:23,986 --> 00:57:25,404
Let's celebrate.
1265
00:57:30,117 --> 00:57:31,661
[Jim chuckles]
1266
00:57:33,621 --> 00:57:34,830
[Jim] Hmm?
1267
00:57:34,830 --> 00:57:36,165
[Jim chuckles]
1268
00:57:40,211 --> 00:57:41,879
Are you gonna tell Hannah?
1269
00:57:42,880 --> 00:57:44,256
You don't think I should?
1270
00:57:48,177 --> 00:57:51,389
I think sex is simpler for her.
1271
00:57:51,389 --> 00:57:52,515
[Jim] Mmm.
1272
00:57:53,516 --> 00:57:55,309
I feel sorry for straight women.
1273
00:57:55,309 --> 00:57:56,769
Having to lie there,
1274
00:57:56,769 --> 00:57:59,230
people assuming you
just want to be fucked.
1275
00:57:59,230 --> 00:58:01,148
No-one talks about it.
1276
00:58:01,148 --> 00:58:03,859
They just do what's expected.
1277
00:58:05,695 --> 00:58:07,571
The benefits of who we are
1278
00:58:07,571 --> 00:58:11,450
is you can't assume
anything about anyone.
1279
00:58:11,450 --> 00:58:13,869
You always have to ask
for what they want.
1280
00:58:13,869 --> 00:58:16,205
State what you want.
1281
00:58:16,205 --> 00:58:18,165
Consent's sexy.
1282
00:58:18,165 --> 00:58:19,834
Understanding what
someone wants.
1283
00:58:21,043 --> 00:58:22,712
Sure, as long as it's not like
1284
00:58:22,712 --> 00:58:24,755
instructions for
a washing machine.
1285
00:58:24,755 --> 00:58:27,341
- [both laugh]
- [Frances snorts]
1286
00:58:27,341 --> 00:58:28,676
[Jim unscrews lid]
1287
00:58:34,598 --> 00:58:37,601
Has Mum talked to you about
me staying in Amsterdam?
1288
00:58:39,020 --> 00:58:40,604
Your parents love you.
1289
00:58:40,604 --> 00:58:42,565
You're very supported by them.
1290
00:58:43,858 --> 00:58:45,026
And?
1291
00:58:45,026 --> 00:58:47,611
And it sounds like
schools in Australia
1292
00:58:47,611 --> 00:58:49,030
are much better now.
1293
00:58:50,197 --> 00:58:51,407
[students whisper]
1294
00:58:51,407 --> 00:58:52,950
[Frances] School's fine.
1295
00:58:52,950 --> 00:58:55,494
It's not like I'm... I'm
getting beaten up or anything.
1296
00:58:56,746 --> 00:59:00,750
I'm not scared exactly,
just not...
1297
00:59:02,626 --> 00:59:03,919
...connecting.
1298
00:59:05,337 --> 00:59:08,132
I'm tired of the feeling
that I'm somehow
1299
00:59:08,132 --> 00:59:10,176
rubbing my queerness
in everyone's face.
1300
00:59:10,176 --> 00:59:11,427
[Jim] Hmm.
1301
00:59:14,472 --> 00:59:16,140
That might never stop.
1302
00:59:17,725 --> 00:59:20,644
But it will never stop us.
1303
00:59:22,980 --> 00:59:28,778
You're the president of
an LGBT club at school.
1304
00:59:28,778 --> 00:59:31,280
So it... it can't be so bad.
1305
00:59:33,908 --> 00:59:36,619
Maybe you don't need to
leave your family just yet.
1306
00:59:38,996 --> 00:59:41,207
But you had to leave
your family.
1307
00:59:41,207 --> 00:59:43,292
No, I didn't have to.
1308
00:59:43,292 --> 00:59:44,710
I wanted to.
1309
00:59:44,710 --> 00:59:46,003
What do you mean?
1310
00:59:47,129 --> 00:59:51,050
Katherine offered to move
with me with the children.
1311
00:59:51,050 --> 00:59:53,552
I decided to come to
Amsterdam on my own.
1312
00:59:55,346 --> 00:59:57,306
Does Mum know this?
1313
00:59:57,306 --> 00:59:58,808
I'm not sure.
1314
00:59:58,808 --> 01:00:01,560
What does your grandma say?
1315
01:00:01,560 --> 01:00:04,188
That she thought it best
that they stayed in Adelaide.
1316
01:00:04,188 --> 01:00:07,233
For Hannah's sake.
She was only 13.
1317
01:00:07,233 --> 01:00:08,984
That's a lie.
1318
01:00:08,984 --> 01:00:12,029
Most of the people
who left home,
1319
01:00:12,071 --> 01:00:14,490
their families and came here,
1320
01:00:14,490 --> 01:00:16,367
they did so because they had to.
1321
01:00:16,367 --> 01:00:17,660
[Frances] Mmm.
1322
01:00:17,660 --> 01:00:20,746
It was a matter of survival,
of having a future.
1323
01:00:20,746 --> 01:00:22,289
But not me.
1324
01:00:23,666 --> 01:00:25,584
I was purely selfish.
1325
01:00:30,047 --> 01:00:31,257
Go on.
1326
01:00:32,424 --> 01:00:33,843
It'll do you good.
1327
01:00:38,264 --> 01:00:41,851
Did you... connect with Isa?
1328
01:00:43,936 --> 01:00:46,355
Did you understand
what Isa wanted?
1329
01:00:48,858 --> 01:00:50,442
Not at all.
1330
01:00:50,442 --> 01:00:52,361
I forgot to ask.
1331
01:00:52,361 --> 01:00:54,363
[Jim laughs]
1332
01:00:56,615 --> 01:00:59,743
Nothing fit into
my idea of things.
1333
01:00:59,743 --> 01:01:02,037
I don't even know what I liked.
1334
01:01:03,747 --> 01:01:05,916
I just thought things
would be clearer.
1335
01:01:05,916 --> 01:01:07,835
[scoffs lightly]
1336
01:01:10,296 --> 01:01:13,465
[gentle guitar music]
1337
01:01:27,062 --> 01:01:28,606
[woman] Hello?
1338
01:01:28,606 --> 01:01:29,940
Oh, hi.
1339
01:01:29,940 --> 01:01:31,984
Nice to meet you, Tilda.
1340
01:01:31,984 --> 01:01:35,446
I don't want to play her
as too passive.
1341
01:01:35,446 --> 01:01:38,365
But she does seem to sacrifice
her needs and wants
1342
01:01:38,365 --> 01:01:39,825
for the sake of her husband.
1343
01:01:39,825 --> 01:01:41,243
- [door opens]
- [Hannah] Mmm.
1344
01:01:41,243 --> 01:01:42,870
- Yeah, you could say that.
- [footsteps approach]
1345
01:01:42,870 --> 01:01:44,246
[Tilda]
Because even though he's gay,
1346
01:01:44,246 --> 01:01:45,414
I mean, it's still the man
1347
01:01:45,414 --> 01:01:46,874
who gets to go
and explore himself
1348
01:01:46,874 --> 01:01:48,292
while the woman stays at home.
1349
01:01:48,292 --> 01:01:50,211
[Hannah] Yeah,
you could say that too.
1350
01:01:50,211 --> 01:01:51,879
I mean, and it's
still the man that,
1351
01:01:51,879 --> 01:01:54,673
you know, doesn't actively
look after his children.
1352
01:01:54,673 --> 01:01:56,467
Which is...
I mean, that's probably
1353
01:01:56,467 --> 01:01:57,801
the reality for many.
1354
01:01:57,801 --> 01:02:00,262
Right? I mean,
especially in that time.
1355
01:02:00,262 --> 01:02:02,765
I just thought that might
not be how you want to...
1356
01:02:02,765 --> 01:02:05,017
...portray him.
1357
01:02:05,017 --> 01:02:06,894
Or her.
1358
01:02:06,894 --> 01:02:09,188
[Hannah] All... all those,
uh, thoughts
1359
01:02:09,188 --> 01:02:11,106
are really interesting, um...
1360
01:02:16,528 --> 01:02:18,822
- Was that about your film?
- Yes.
1361
01:02:21,200 --> 01:02:22,660
Have you made up with Frances?
1362
01:02:22,660 --> 01:02:25,079
[chuckles] I didn't think
I needed to.
1363
01:02:26,163 --> 01:02:28,540
You do know it's actually OK
1364
01:02:28,540 --> 01:02:31,585
to disagree and say hurtful
things to someone?
1365
01:02:32,544 --> 01:02:35,339
You didn't have to push so hard.
1366
01:02:35,339 --> 01:02:37,675
Is this about the fact
that Frances had sex?
1367
01:02:40,219 --> 01:02:41,804
Oh. You didn't know.
1368
01:02:41,804 --> 01:02:43,514
How could I know?
1369
01:02:43,514 --> 01:02:47,643
I'm sure Frances will tell you
all the details in no time.
1370
01:02:48,727 --> 01:02:51,313
Don't worry.
1371
01:02:51,313 --> 01:02:53,983
They've got more of
a head start than I ever had.
1372
01:02:55,776 --> 01:02:58,279
When I was Frances's age,
1373
01:02:58,279 --> 01:03:01,407
I didn't even have the word
to describe the way I...
1374
01:03:03,867 --> 01:03:05,327
I know, Dad.
1375
01:03:06,954 --> 01:03:09,915
But Frances has all the words.
1376
01:03:09,915 --> 01:03:11,292
[puts peeler down]
1377
01:03:11,292 --> 01:03:14,003
Frances will be fine.
1378
01:03:14,003 --> 01:03:16,130
They can...
1379
01:03:16,130 --> 01:03:18,757
...idolise me from afar.
1380
01:03:18,799 --> 01:03:20,467
That's just the way I like it.
1381
01:03:20,467 --> 01:03:22,261
[Jim chops vegetables]
1382
01:03:23,304 --> 01:03:25,472
So you're still going
for the Helsinki job?
1383
01:03:25,472 --> 01:03:27,558
Oh, you don't think I should?
1384
01:03:29,059 --> 01:03:30,352
What are we cooking?
1385
01:03:30,352 --> 01:03:32,062
My osso buco.
1386
01:03:33,772 --> 01:03:35,566
I might make something for us.
1387
01:03:38,444 --> 01:03:40,487
[grunts] Oh, fuck!
1388
01:03:40,487 --> 01:03:42,323
- Let me see.
- No, no.
1389
01:03:42,323 --> 01:03:44,283
I'm fine. Fuck.
1390
01:03:44,283 --> 01:03:45,909
Is it deep?
Does it need stitches?
1391
01:03:45,909 --> 01:03:47,786
- No, no, I'm fine.
- Dad?
1392
01:03:47,786 --> 01:03:50,205
[Jim] I don't need
a fucking hospital! Oh!
1393
01:03:50,205 --> 01:03:51,790
- [Hannah] Easy.
- [groans]
1394
01:03:51,790 --> 01:03:54,460
- [Hannah] Just lean here.
- [Jim sighs in frustration]
1395
01:03:55,919 --> 01:03:57,254
[Hannah] Hold it.
1396
01:04:03,552 --> 01:04:04,845
[Jim] Hmm.
1397
01:04:04,845 --> 01:04:06,889
Tell me about your film.
1398
01:04:08,390 --> 01:04:09,683
Uh...
1399
01:04:09,683 --> 01:04:12,311
It's about a couple.
1400
01:04:12,311 --> 01:04:15,314
It's about commitment
1401
01:04:15,314 --> 01:04:18,275
and our contradictory
feelings about it.
1402
01:04:18,275 --> 01:04:21,236
Well, my feelings about it.
And, um...
1403
01:04:21,236 --> 01:04:23,614
[grabs scissors]
1404
01:04:23,614 --> 01:04:25,574
...I don't think people
are getting it.
1405
01:04:26,825 --> 01:04:28,035
[Jim] Hmm.
1406
01:04:29,536 --> 01:04:31,497
Do you remember Stephen?
1407
01:04:31,497 --> 01:04:34,917
[uplifting music]
1408
01:04:34,917 --> 01:04:36,835
[Hannah]
Oh, I loved him so much.
1409
01:04:36,835 --> 01:04:38,087
[Frances and Jim chuckle]
1410
01:04:38,087 --> 01:04:39,797
So did Frances.
1411
01:04:39,797 --> 01:04:41,715
[Jim] Yeah. So did I.
1412
01:04:43,133 --> 01:04:45,969
But he was a fervent
monogamist, poor thing.
1413
01:04:45,969 --> 01:04:47,846
Didn't you tell him
what you wanted?
1414
01:04:47,846 --> 01:04:49,890
Yes, and he agreed.
1415
01:04:50,974 --> 01:04:52,518
At first.
1416
01:04:52,518 --> 01:04:54,395
Until he didn't.
1417
01:04:54,395 --> 01:04:56,271
And you didn't change.
1418
01:04:56,271 --> 01:04:58,399
I don't believe in monogamy,
dearest.
1419
01:05:00,776 --> 01:05:02,403
Oh, he was so lovely.
1420
01:05:04,863 --> 01:05:06,865
You don't believe
in monogamy either.
1421
01:05:09,868 --> 01:05:11,870
But I also know
how great it can be.
1422
01:05:12,871 --> 01:05:15,082
- Constancy. Loyalty.
- [Jim scoffs]
1423
01:05:15,082 --> 01:05:18,127
Sounds like you're talking
about a dog. Hmm!
1424
01:05:18,127 --> 01:05:20,337
How is the dog anyway?
1425
01:05:20,337 --> 01:05:22,840
Oh! I need to call Mum.
1426
01:05:28,595 --> 01:05:30,389
I'm not very open.
1427
01:05:31,390 --> 01:05:34,560
No. I guess not.
1428
01:05:43,110 --> 01:05:44,570
[door opens]
1429
01:05:46,029 --> 01:05:47,364
[Hannah] Are you awake?
1430
01:05:53,162 --> 01:05:54,746
Are you not hungry?
1431
01:05:56,290 --> 01:05:57,916
I was thinking
you should stay here
1432
01:05:57,916 --> 01:05:59,251
while I go to London.
1433
01:06:00,878 --> 01:06:02,004
Why?
1434
01:06:02,004 --> 01:06:03,338
I don't know, just...
1435
01:06:03,338 --> 01:06:05,466
...gives you the chance
to soak up Amsterdam.
1436
01:06:07,217 --> 01:06:09,678
Sounds like you had
a really good time with Isa.
1437
01:06:11,763 --> 01:06:13,682
I was...
I was going to tell you.
1438
01:06:14,641 --> 01:06:16,351
It's OK, Frances. It's fine.
1439
01:06:18,854 --> 01:06:20,522
OK.
1440
01:06:20,522 --> 01:06:21,565
[kisses]
1441
01:06:24,693 --> 01:06:26,778
I'm excited for you.
It's a big thing.
1442
01:06:26,778 --> 01:06:28,739
[footsteps recede]
1443
01:06:28,780 --> 01:06:30,282
[door closes]
1444
01:06:36,580 --> 01:06:38,457
[mellow music]
1445
01:06:50,469 --> 01:06:52,346
Jim Hill in Helsinki.
1446
01:06:52,346 --> 01:06:54,306
Jani! How are you?
1447
01:06:55,516 --> 01:06:57,434
You... you got the study
I sent you?
1448
01:06:57,434 --> 01:06:59,686
Yeah, yeah, of course.
Fascinating stuff.
1449
01:06:59,686 --> 01:07:02,439
Nothing gets my heart racing
like social housing theory.
1450
01:07:02,439 --> 01:07:03,690
- [chuckles]
- I mean it, Jim.
1451
01:07:03,690 --> 01:07:05,567
- It's good to see you.
- You too.
1452
01:07:11,490 --> 01:07:14,535
[Jim] So this is still
a huge focus for me.
1453
01:07:14,535 --> 01:07:18,705
Building scientific capacities
for community groups.
1454
01:07:18,705 --> 01:07:21,250
I remember you raised this
even all the way back
1455
01:07:21,250 --> 01:07:25,003
at the CDC symposium
at AIDS 2018.
1456
01:07:25,003 --> 01:07:27,881
It was in my plenary talk,
the one I gave at the IAS.
1457
01:07:27,881 --> 01:07:29,174
2019.
1458
01:07:29,174 --> 01:07:30,842
We can't keep up.
1459
01:07:30,842 --> 01:07:32,844
Oh. You were there, Karolina.
[chuckles]
1460
01:07:32,844 --> 01:07:35,931
I was, I was, but I still
couldn't keep up!
1461
01:07:35,931 --> 01:07:37,933
[all chuckle]
1462
01:07:40,269 --> 01:07:41,353
So...
1463
01:07:42,521 --> 01:07:44,314
...is this an area
that you'd like
1464
01:07:44,314 --> 01:07:46,400
someone in this new
position to focus on?
1465
01:07:47,609 --> 01:07:48,986
[Karolina clears throat]
1466
01:07:48,986 --> 01:07:50,779
We were very excited
1467
01:07:50,779 --> 01:07:52,781
when you called to say
you'd be in town
1468
01:07:52,781 --> 01:07:55,033
and wanted to talk
about the position.
1469
01:07:55,033 --> 01:07:57,661
It's such an honour,
personally speaking.
1470
01:07:57,661 --> 01:08:00,038
Of course we jumped on
the opportunity to meet up.
1471
01:08:00,038 --> 01:08:02,583
[man 2] We would be honored
to access someone
1472
01:08:02,583 --> 01:08:04,167
with your knowledge
and experience.
1473
01:08:04,167 --> 01:08:05,460
Yes.
1474
01:08:05,460 --> 01:08:08,505
We were talking that
maybe we can even
1475
01:08:08,505 --> 01:08:12,175
formalise something
in an advisory capacity
1476
01:08:12,175 --> 01:08:16,680
or a board position, when
they come up in three years.
1477
01:08:16,680 --> 01:08:18,932
Mmm. Yeah.
1478
01:08:21,935 --> 01:08:23,645
While you're here in Helsinki,
1479
01:08:23,645 --> 01:08:25,856
I was hoping to take you out
for lunch or dinner.
1480
01:08:25,856 --> 01:08:28,609
And why would you want
to do that?
1481
01:08:28,609 --> 01:08:32,070
Well, we were very impressed
by Mirjam Oerlemans.
1482
01:08:32,070 --> 01:08:33,447
Mirjam?
1483
01:08:33,447 --> 01:08:37,075
She's young, but her advocacy
for equality care
1484
01:08:37,075 --> 01:08:39,911
aligns really well with some
of our new impact areas.
1485
01:08:40,871 --> 01:08:43,165
You've been a kind of mentor
to her for years.
1486
01:08:43,165 --> 01:08:44,333
10 years.
1487
01:08:46,043 --> 01:08:48,211
And you're considering her
for this new...
1488
01:08:48,211 --> 01:08:49,921
Hence my clumsy invite
to dinner.
1489
01:08:51,798 --> 01:08:54,343
You want my opinion on
Mirjam Oerlemans?
1490
01:08:54,343 --> 01:08:56,803
Well, you're her reference.
1491
01:08:57,804 --> 01:08:59,931
But we respect your opinion.
1492
01:08:59,931 --> 01:09:02,392
Your honesty especially,
it's legendary.
1493
01:09:02,392 --> 01:09:04,561
I wish we could do dinner,
but...
1494
01:09:04,561 --> 01:09:10,525
...I came without a bag,
and I... I have work back home.
1495
01:09:10,525 --> 01:09:14,363
But you don't need dinner
for me to tell you Mirjam...
1496
01:09:16,740 --> 01:09:18,575
...would be perfect.
1497
01:09:18,575 --> 01:09:21,244
She's pragmatic. Evidence-based.
1498
01:09:21,244 --> 01:09:24,373
Her success is focusing
on young people
1499
01:09:24,373 --> 01:09:26,083
and marginalised groups.
1500
01:09:26,083 --> 01:09:28,543
Her stellar
rights-based approach
1501
01:09:28,543 --> 01:09:31,505
has meant actual
policy change, not just...
1502
01:09:31,505 --> 01:09:33,423
[voice fades]
1503
01:09:44,851 --> 01:09:47,521
[Harry] 'Cause that is
beautiful. OK?
1504
01:09:47,521 --> 01:09:48,897
[door opens, keys jangle]
1505
01:09:50,524 --> 01:09:52,234
- [Jim] Hello!
- [door closes]
1506
01:09:54,986 --> 01:09:57,072
Hello!
1507
01:09:57,114 --> 01:09:58,615
[Frances] Say your name.
1508
01:09:59,825 --> 01:10:01,159
- Why?
- Hi, guys.
1509
01:10:01,159 --> 01:10:02,661
Just dropping
the professor home.
1510
01:10:02,661 --> 01:10:04,705
You need to say your name,
not just hello.
1511
01:10:04,705 --> 01:10:06,456
Otherwise, we don't know
who you are
1512
01:10:06,456 --> 01:10:07,999
or what you want.
1513
01:10:07,999 --> 01:10:09,835
Who else would it be?
1514
01:10:10,961 --> 01:10:12,629
[chuckles]
1515
01:10:13,839 --> 01:10:16,091
Uh, I think it's time for bed.
1516
01:10:16,091 --> 01:10:17,968
Well, how did it go?
1517
01:10:17,968 --> 01:10:20,887
- Oh, wet and miserable.
- Hmm.
1518
01:10:22,013 --> 01:10:23,265
But really good.
1519
01:10:23,265 --> 01:10:24,933
Let me, uh...
1520
01:10:24,933 --> 01:10:26,601
[groans]
1521
01:10:27,853 --> 01:10:30,021
[mutters] it went really well.
1522
01:10:31,106 --> 01:10:32,816
They'd be lucky to have me.
1523
01:10:34,025 --> 01:10:36,695
It reminded me... Oh.
1524
01:10:37,863 --> 01:10:38,989
...of all the ideas...
1525
01:10:41,658 --> 01:10:43,785
- Of the ideas I still have.
- [fridge door closes]
1526
01:10:43,785 --> 01:10:46,538
Of the energy I have.
1527
01:10:46,538 --> 01:10:47,998
Ahhh.
1528
01:10:52,085 --> 01:10:54,296
What... what time is it?
1529
01:10:54,296 --> 01:10:56,423
Let's get you to bed, Professor.
1530
01:10:58,508 --> 01:10:59,551
[Jim mutters]
1531
01:11:00,552 --> 01:11:03,013
- [birds twitter]
- [church bell tolls]
1532
01:11:04,264 --> 01:11:06,183
[Hannah] I think
she could be interesting.
1533
01:11:06,183 --> 01:11:08,226
She had some interesting ideas.
1534
01:11:09,436 --> 01:11:10,687
[footsteps]
1535
01:11:10,687 --> 01:11:12,564
But at least she's invested.
1536
01:11:12,564 --> 01:11:13,690
One second.
1537
01:11:14,733 --> 01:11:15,984
Have fun.
1538
01:11:15,984 --> 01:11:18,111
I think it makes sense
for you to stay here.
1539
01:11:18,111 --> 01:11:19,279
[Frances] Mm-hm.
1540
01:11:19,321 --> 01:11:20,489
This was always gonna happen.
1541
01:11:20,530 --> 01:11:21,907
Don't make your mum feel guilty.
1542
01:11:21,907 --> 01:11:24,576
Yes, don't shame your mother
for working, Frances.
1543
01:11:24,576 --> 01:11:25,744
I'm not.
1544
01:11:25,744 --> 01:11:27,788
You rather have a mother
who stayed home
1545
01:11:27,788 --> 01:11:29,080
and cooked biscuits for you?
1546
01:11:29,080 --> 01:11:30,415
You want that kind of a mother?
1547
01:11:30,415 --> 01:11:32,125
Yep. I should go. I need
to go and get the train.
1548
01:11:32,125 --> 01:11:34,252
No, I don't want
that kind of a mother.
1549
01:11:34,252 --> 01:11:35,253
Yeah. Good.
1550
01:11:35,253 --> 01:11:37,422
Oh! For fuck's sake!
1551
01:11:37,422 --> 01:11:39,800
Um, originally I had said
Frances might come.
1552
01:11:39,800 --> 01:11:41,885
Tell your mother you'll be fine.
1553
01:11:41,885 --> 01:11:43,470
Or tell me nothing.
1554
01:11:43,470 --> 01:11:44,554
[Frances] Hmm.
1555
01:11:45,680 --> 01:11:47,474
But I... I did want to tell you.
1556
01:11:47,474 --> 01:11:49,976
I just... I hadn't yet.
1557
01:11:49,976 --> 01:11:51,228
[Hannah] That's not what I
meant.
1558
01:11:51,228 --> 01:11:53,146
It's fine.
You didn't have to tell me.
1559
01:11:53,146 --> 01:11:54,356
OK?
1560
01:11:54,356 --> 01:11:56,691
[Jim] OK? Of course it's OK.
1561
01:11:57,776 --> 01:11:58,985
[Jim] Uh...
1562
01:12:00,195 --> 01:12:03,240
You don't want to stay
in Amsterdam?
1563
01:12:03,240 --> 01:12:05,200
[whispers]
Do you want to come with me?
1564
01:12:10,413 --> 01:12:13,792
But Dad's fine. He's been
to Finland for an interview.
1565
01:12:13,792 --> 01:12:15,752
[Katherine]
You need to tell your father
1566
01:12:15,752 --> 01:12:18,255
that he's being
ridiculous and selfish.
1567
01:12:18,255 --> 01:12:21,174
He doesn't need me
to tell him those things.
1568
01:12:21,174 --> 01:12:24,010
Tell him he needs to retire
with some fucking dignity.
1569
01:12:24,010 --> 01:12:25,679
We don't need to tell him
anything.
1570
01:12:25,679 --> 01:12:27,305
He's feeling old, Mum.
1571
01:12:27,305 --> 01:12:30,225
Have you talked to him
about your film yet?
1572
01:12:30,225 --> 01:12:32,018
Uh, kind of.
1573
01:12:32,018 --> 01:12:33,812
You're worried that
he's not gonna give you
1574
01:12:33,812 --> 01:12:35,188
his divine blessing?
1575
01:12:35,188 --> 01:12:37,440
I just don't want to get
into an argument.
1576
01:12:37,440 --> 01:12:38,859
Then he'll tell you
1577
01:12:38,859 --> 01:12:40,944
there are far more
interesting parts in his life,
1578
01:12:40,944 --> 01:12:42,612
so be ready.
1579
01:12:42,612 --> 01:12:44,197
Maybe.
1580
01:12:50,579 --> 01:12:52,539
[both sigh]
1581
01:12:52,539 --> 01:12:55,125
You never come visit anymore,
Mirjam.
1582
01:12:55,125 --> 01:12:57,043
- You told me not to.
- I never!
1583
01:12:57,043 --> 01:12:59,671
[laughs] You did.
1584
01:12:59,671 --> 01:13:01,756
- [Jim laughs]
- You did.
1585
01:13:05,886 --> 01:13:09,222
Thank you for the kind words
you said about me.
1586
01:13:09,222 --> 01:13:10,682
I meant them.
1587
01:13:13,351 --> 01:13:15,520
You could have told me.
1588
01:13:15,520 --> 01:13:18,148
I didn't know you were going
for the same job
1589
01:13:18,148 --> 01:13:19,399
until you announced it
1590
01:13:19,399 --> 01:13:21,359
in front of everyone
at your party.
1591
01:13:21,359 --> 01:13:23,278
If you'd known earlier,
1592
01:13:23,278 --> 01:13:25,363
would you still have
gone for the position?
1593
01:13:28,575 --> 01:13:29,910
If there is a job,
1594
01:13:29,910 --> 01:13:31,578
think of Richard, won't you?
1595
01:13:33,872 --> 01:13:35,373
Get him out of my hair.
1596
01:13:43,798 --> 01:13:45,550
Two hugs.
1597
01:13:45,550 --> 01:13:47,302
Aren't you lucky?
1598
01:13:47,302 --> 01:13:49,137
[laughs]
1599
01:13:57,228 --> 01:13:59,439
[teens chatter indistinctly]
1600
01:14:10,659 --> 01:14:13,536
[Frances sighs] I can't
believe I feel jealous.
1601
01:14:13,536 --> 01:14:15,538
[Hannah] It's OK, I understand.
1602
01:14:15,538 --> 01:14:17,415
[scoffs] It's not OK.
1603
01:14:18,541 --> 01:14:21,586
It's stupid. It's so fucking...
1604
01:14:21,586 --> 01:14:24,214
It's so fucking stupid.
1605
01:14:26,299 --> 01:14:28,051
Maybe things were
just a bit fast.
1606
01:14:29,636 --> 01:14:30,804
My God.
1607
01:14:30,804 --> 01:14:33,139
It's so immature of me,
isn't it?
1608
01:14:34,265 --> 01:14:36,518
Can we just go home?
1609
01:14:37,811 --> 01:14:39,187
We will.
1610
01:14:39,187 --> 01:14:42,148
Talk to Jimpa about your film
and let's go home.
1611
01:14:42,148 --> 01:14:43,650
- I will.
- [door opens]
1612
01:14:43,650 --> 01:14:45,610
[Jim groans]
1613
01:14:50,949 --> 01:14:53,660
I don't think I want the job.
1614
01:14:53,660 --> 01:14:57,789
I think...
I'll stay in Amsterdam.
1615
01:14:57,789 --> 01:15:00,125
I... I think Amsterdam could be
1616
01:15:00,125 --> 01:15:03,378
really great for you, Frances.
1617
01:15:03,378 --> 01:15:07,382
I'll stay here
so you can live with me.
1618
01:15:07,382 --> 01:15:09,384
- Are you sure?
- Of course.
1619
01:15:09,384 --> 01:15:13,722
It'll mean that you'll come
visit more often as well.
1620
01:15:13,722 --> 01:15:15,181
Yeah.
1621
01:15:15,181 --> 01:15:16,725
What do you say, grand-thing?
1622
01:15:29,988 --> 01:15:32,198
- OK.
- [Jim] Good.
1623
01:15:33,199 --> 01:15:34,826
Is that what you want?
1624
01:15:36,578 --> 01:15:38,580
Yeah, I mean,
sounds amazing, Jimpa.
1625
01:15:38,580 --> 01:15:40,707
Good.
1626
01:15:43,501 --> 01:15:45,128
[Hannah] Fuck me.
1627
01:15:45,128 --> 01:15:46,963
[Harry laughs]
1628
01:15:46,963 --> 01:15:48,256
[Harry] Your cunning plan
1629
01:15:48,256 --> 01:15:50,175
really didn't work out
as expected, did it?
1630
01:15:59,392 --> 01:16:01,352
[thumping electro music]
1631
01:16:03,605 --> 01:16:05,648
[thumping electro music
continues]
1632
01:16:30,965 --> 01:16:32,592
How old are you?
1633
01:16:33,760 --> 01:16:34,969
Old enough.
1634
01:16:34,969 --> 01:16:37,305
Hm. Just wanting to be safe,
you know.
1635
01:16:37,305 --> 01:16:39,390
Always safe.
1636
01:16:39,390 --> 01:16:41,226
I once fucked an older guy,
1637
01:16:41,226 --> 01:16:43,561
then discovered he'd escaped
from a nursing home.
1638
01:16:43,561 --> 01:16:46,648
[both chuckle]
1639
01:16:47,732 --> 01:16:50,318
The perils of being
a daddy chaser.
1640
01:16:50,318 --> 01:16:51,528
[man] Hmm!
1641
01:16:53,321 --> 01:16:55,156
So come on.
1642
01:16:55,198 --> 01:16:56,574
Chase me.
1643
01:17:04,415 --> 01:17:05,917
I did say I regretted Frances
1644
01:17:05,917 --> 01:17:07,293
not spending
enough time with him.
1645
01:17:07,293 --> 01:17:08,336
[Harry] Mmm.
1646
01:17:09,504 --> 01:17:11,089
It is a great city.
1647
01:17:12,590 --> 01:17:15,051
[phone buzzes]
1648
01:17:19,264 --> 01:17:20,682
[phone falls silent]
1649
01:17:23,101 --> 01:17:25,645
- Really good cafes.
- Mmm.
1650
01:17:25,645 --> 01:17:27,105
Good schools too.
1651
01:17:30,692 --> 01:17:32,360
[phone buzzes]
1652
01:17:35,822 --> 01:17:37,157
Hey, Richard.
1653
01:17:43,246 --> 01:17:47,125
- [heart monitor beeps]
- [ventilator hisses]
1654
01:17:53,631 --> 01:17:57,302
[Hannah] Uh, I don't know
what they've told you...
1655
01:17:57,302 --> 01:17:59,888
...but two days ago,
you had a bad stroke.
1656
01:18:01,431 --> 01:18:03,892
So you've been in a coma
to protect your brain.
1657
01:18:05,685 --> 01:18:08,104
And now they've taken you
out of the coma
1658
01:18:08,104 --> 01:18:09,480
to see how you are.
1659
01:18:11,191 --> 01:18:14,027
And they told us that you can
hear us now. Is that right?
1660
01:18:16,571 --> 01:18:18,406
Apparently you can
squeeze my hand.
1661
01:18:21,242 --> 01:18:23,912
So if you can hear me, Dad,
can you squeeze my hand?
1662
01:18:27,207 --> 01:18:28,917
OK.
1663
01:18:28,917 --> 01:18:32,170
So we'll do once for yes,
two for no.
1664
01:18:33,588 --> 01:18:34,839
OK.
1665
01:18:34,839 --> 01:18:36,257
[Jim moans softly]
1666
01:18:36,257 --> 01:18:39,427
[Hannah] So are you OK?
I mean, are you in any pain?
1667
01:18:44,057 --> 01:18:46,351
No? Good. OK.
1668
01:18:48,269 --> 01:18:50,146
And do you know who I am?
1669
01:18:50,146 --> 01:18:52,315
It's me, Hannah, your daughter.
1670
01:18:56,819 --> 01:18:58,404
And a filmmaker
1671
01:18:58,404 --> 01:19:00,156
and a woman and a mother.
1672
01:19:03,493 --> 01:19:05,328
[chuckles]
1673
01:19:07,997 --> 01:19:10,625
And Frances is here as well,
your grandchild.
1674
01:19:14,879 --> 01:19:16,214
Hi, Jimpa.
1675
01:19:16,214 --> 01:19:17,465
[Jim grunts]
1676
01:19:30,478 --> 01:19:32,814
Don't worry, Dad, OK?
I know what to do.
1677
01:19:33,773 --> 01:19:35,024
OK, I know.
1678
01:19:40,113 --> 01:19:41,698
Do you feel like you?
1679
01:19:44,284 --> 01:19:46,452
No, of course you don't.
Stupid question.
1680
01:19:48,162 --> 01:19:49,706
Strange, you not talking.
1681
01:19:55,086 --> 01:19:56,629
Shall I tell you about yourself?
1682
01:19:59,549 --> 01:20:00,717
OK.
1683
01:20:00,717 --> 01:20:04,220
[clears throat]
You were born in 1951.
1684
01:20:05,221 --> 01:20:07,432
Your parents were Mary and Bill.
1685
01:20:08,808 --> 01:20:10,810
You don't believe in monogamy.
1686
01:20:10,810 --> 01:20:13,438
Uh, you've had many lovers.
1687
01:20:14,731 --> 01:20:16,441
Stephen, who we all loved.
1688
01:20:18,234 --> 01:20:21,112
And then when you first
got here, there was a, um...
1689
01:20:22,071 --> 01:20:23,740
He was a photographer.
1690
01:20:23,781 --> 01:20:26,534
Tall, blonde.
1691
01:20:26,534 --> 01:20:28,453
He took that photo of you
that I really loved.
1692
01:20:28,453 --> 01:20:29,620
[Emily] Daan.
1693
01:20:29,620 --> 01:20:31,789
His name was Daan.
1694
01:20:31,789 --> 01:20:33,708
I remember. Yeah, Daan.
1695
01:20:35,126 --> 01:20:36,502
He can't remember?
1696
01:20:36,502 --> 01:20:39,797
I'm just making sure that
he understands who he is.
1697
01:20:39,797 --> 01:20:42,008
Hey. Sorry.
1698
01:20:49,766 --> 01:20:51,768
Oh, God, look at him.
1699
01:20:51,768 --> 01:20:53,269
Jesus.
1700
01:20:54,771 --> 01:20:56,147
Oh, Hannah, I can't bear that.
1701
01:20:56,147 --> 01:20:58,608
- Hey, he can hear you.
- [Emily] OK.
1702
01:21:03,029 --> 01:21:05,239
[Emily] So he can't
breathe on his own?
1703
01:21:05,281 --> 01:21:06,574
- [Hannah] No.
- OK.
1704
01:21:06,574 --> 01:21:08,076
Not yet, anyway. Hmm?
1705
01:21:08,076 --> 01:21:10,745
[kisses]
1706
01:21:10,745 --> 01:21:13,206
Jesus, can they just
prop him up or something?
1707
01:21:13,206 --> 01:21:15,083
He looks fucking horrific
like this.
1708
01:21:15,083 --> 01:21:17,251
Why don't we just
sit and talk to him?
1709
01:21:17,251 --> 01:21:18,294
[Emily] OK.
1710
01:21:27,929 --> 01:21:29,764
I mean, I don't really know
what to say.
1711
01:21:29,764 --> 01:21:31,516
He's usually the one
doing all the talking.
1712
01:21:32,892 --> 01:21:34,268
You talk just fine.
1713
01:21:34,268 --> 01:21:36,020
Yeah, I know that. I know I do.
1714
01:21:39,065 --> 01:21:41,317
Oh, my God, Hannah,
look at our dad.
1715
01:21:41,317 --> 01:21:42,860
[whispers] He can hear you.
1716
01:21:43,778 --> 01:21:46,948
Oh, god, dad, you look
like shit. [chuckles]
1717
01:21:48,116 --> 01:21:49,742
Hi.
1718
01:21:49,742 --> 01:21:51,452
It's OK.
1719
01:21:51,452 --> 01:21:52,787
[sniffles]
1720
01:21:52,787 --> 01:21:54,414
[footsteps]
1721
01:21:54,414 --> 01:21:55,706
[Emily sobs]
1722
01:21:59,252 --> 01:22:00,336
Oh.
1723
01:22:00,336 --> 01:22:01,671
I am here.
1724
01:22:03,131 --> 01:22:04,507
It's OK.
1725
01:22:10,513 --> 01:22:12,807
The doctor said there was
a similar patient
1726
01:22:12,807 --> 01:22:14,475
who can now sit in the backyard
1727
01:22:14,475 --> 01:22:16,686
with a cup of tea
and a dog on their lap
1728
01:22:16,686 --> 01:22:18,938
and... and that
there's... there's no reason
1729
01:22:18,938 --> 01:22:20,940
Dad couldn't have that life.
1730
01:22:22,358 --> 01:22:24,861
Oh, this coffee is awful.
1731
01:22:24,861 --> 01:22:26,821
What have they done to the milk?
1732
01:22:26,821 --> 01:22:28,573
Look at your risotto.
1733
01:22:28,614 --> 01:22:30,992
- Who puts tofu in risotto?
- It's fine.
1734
01:22:30,992 --> 01:22:33,619
No. Excuse me!
If it's bad, you send it back.
1735
01:22:33,619 --> 01:22:35,246
[Hannah] I've already eaten
a quarter of it.
1736
01:22:35,246 --> 01:22:37,790
Jesus, Hannah, they need
to know if their food is bad.
1737
01:22:37,790 --> 01:22:40,710
I will tell them and I'll get
them to take it back.
1738
01:22:40,710 --> 01:22:41,794
No, please don't.
1739
01:22:41,794 --> 01:22:43,296
Why not?
1740
01:22:43,296 --> 01:22:46,632
[pop music plays softly]
1741
01:22:46,632 --> 01:22:48,593
Who puts tofu in risotto?
1742
01:22:48,593 --> 01:22:51,012
[waiter] Would you like me
to remove the tofu?
1743
01:22:51,012 --> 01:22:52,096
No, it's fine.
1744
01:22:52,096 --> 01:22:53,473
I've... I've already eaten some.
1745
01:22:53,473 --> 01:22:54,765
And honestly, it's fine.
1746
01:22:54,765 --> 01:22:57,351
Let her have the terrible
risotto if she wants.
1747
01:22:59,187 --> 01:23:00,605
Fine, yep.
1748
01:23:00,605 --> 01:23:02,190
Just tell the kitchen
that it's terrible.
1749
01:23:02,190 --> 01:23:05,109
And look, these eggs, they're
way overcooked. Look at that.
1750
01:23:06,068 --> 01:23:08,237
Have a proper look. They're
solid, they don't even move.
1751
01:23:08,237 --> 01:23:10,531
Uh, shall I get the kitchen
to make them again?
1752
01:23:10,573 --> 01:23:12,450
No, you just tell the kitchen
that they're terrible.
1753
01:23:13,493 --> 01:23:14,660
[waiter] OK.
1754
01:23:28,966 --> 01:23:30,426
We could get him a dog
1755
01:23:30,426 --> 01:23:31,844
and he could sit
in the garden...
1756
01:23:31,844 --> 01:23:33,095
Probably hooked up to machines.
1757
01:23:33,262 --> 01:23:35,389
...the dog on his lap,
and they... they said that
1758
01:23:35,389 --> 01:23:37,475
he might even be able to
communicate a little bit.
1759
01:23:37,475 --> 01:23:39,435
[Hannah] In the words
of the doctor, "Maybe,
1760
01:23:39,435 --> 01:23:41,103
"and after an extended
and difficult
1761
01:23:41,103 --> 01:23:42,313
"period of rehabilitation."
1762
01:23:42,313 --> 01:23:43,689
[Emily] It's still possible.
1763
01:23:43,689 --> 01:23:45,191
It could take years, Em,
1764
01:23:45,191 --> 01:23:46,567
with no guarantee,
1765
01:23:46,567 --> 01:23:48,444
and that's the best possible
scenario.
1766
01:23:48,444 --> 01:23:49,904
But it's still a life.
1767
01:23:49,904 --> 01:23:51,697
And no-one should give up
their life to look after Dad.
1768
01:23:51,697 --> 01:23:53,491
- He wouldn't want that.
- Oh, Jesus, Hannah.
1769
01:23:53,491 --> 01:23:55,493
- It's not what he wants.
- How do you know that?
1770
01:23:55,493 --> 01:23:56,911
There was
no advanced care directive.
1771
01:23:56,911 --> 01:23:59,705
There's no recent will either.
Stephen's still in it.
1772
01:23:59,705 --> 01:24:01,874
Because it wasn't updated.
But we know what he wants.
1773
01:24:01,874 --> 01:24:03,292
[Emily] That's not the same.
1774
01:24:03,292 --> 01:24:05,211
He told me, Em,
and he was very clear.
1775
01:24:05,211 --> 01:24:07,463
If he ends up more diminished,
let him die.
1776
01:24:10,716 --> 01:24:12,593
And... and what?
1777
01:24:14,345 --> 01:24:15,888
What, we just go and get coffee?
1778
01:24:15,888 --> 01:24:17,181
Is that what he said?
1779
01:24:18,224 --> 01:24:21,394
You know what Dad's like.
He just says shit like I do.
1780
01:24:21,394 --> 01:24:23,104
He could have written it down,
1781
01:24:23,104 --> 01:24:24,772
he could have... he could have
left instructions,
1782
01:24:24,772 --> 01:24:26,482
but he didn't.
1783
01:24:26,482 --> 01:24:28,651
And maybe he would be very happy
1784
01:24:28,651 --> 01:24:31,237
just sitting in the garden
with a dog on his lap.
1785
01:24:31,237 --> 01:24:32,530
That's his idea of hell.
1786
01:24:32,530 --> 01:24:33,948
[Emily] Well, lately
he's been happy
1787
01:24:33,990 --> 01:24:35,741
to sit on the couch
and eat yoghurt.
1788
01:24:36,784 --> 01:24:38,327
He has been very diminished
1789
01:24:38,327 --> 01:24:39,412
since his first stroke, Hannah.
1790
01:24:39,412 --> 01:24:40,746
You just haven't been around.
1791
01:24:48,838 --> 01:24:51,173
I have seen him sit on
the couch and eat yoghurt.
1792
01:24:52,967 --> 01:24:54,260
[Emily] Oh.
1793
01:24:57,805 --> 01:25:02,351
Well, there were these panels
and they were about 3x6
1794
01:25:02,351 --> 01:25:04,478
and, well, there were
all different kinds of fabrics
1795
01:25:04,478 --> 01:25:06,606
and... and we would decorate
them
1796
01:25:06,606 --> 01:25:08,107
with gems and buttons and...
1797
01:25:08,107 --> 01:25:09,317
[Dede] Everything.
1798
01:25:09,317 --> 01:25:10,443
[Emily] Anything.
Whatever we wanted.
1799
01:25:10,443 --> 01:25:11,986
[Mark] Sequins,
1800
01:25:11,986 --> 01:25:13,571
stuffed animals.
1801
01:25:13,571 --> 01:25:15,156
Hair. Condoms.
1802
01:25:15,197 --> 01:25:17,450
[others chuckle]
1803
01:25:17,450 --> 01:25:19,493
But everything you got
you then...
1804
01:25:19,493 --> 01:25:22,622
...sewed together
to form the quilt.
1805
01:25:22,622 --> 01:25:25,499
I felt like we were doing
that every week. I loved it.
1806
01:25:25,499 --> 01:25:28,544
How could you love it?
I mean, it's so... sad.
1807
01:25:28,544 --> 01:25:30,963
- I think it was just...
- [Dede] Hmm.
1808
01:25:30,963 --> 01:25:32,840
[Emily] I was 15.
1809
01:25:32,840 --> 01:25:35,468
I think it just felt like
family arts and crafts to me.
1810
01:25:35,468 --> 01:25:36,886
[Uri] it was important work
1811
01:25:36,886 --> 01:25:39,972
because some didn't get
funerals or celebrations.
1812
01:25:39,972 --> 01:25:41,515
Or families were ashamed.
1813
01:25:41,515 --> 01:25:43,267
You know, or didn't want
to bring attention
1814
01:25:43,267 --> 01:25:44,268
to how they died.
1815
01:25:44,268 --> 01:25:45,811
[Uri] So it's the only way
1816
01:25:45,811 --> 01:25:48,272
people who had
an AIDS-related death
1817
01:25:48,272 --> 01:25:49,690
are remembered still.
1818
01:25:49,690 --> 01:25:52,026
- [Emily] Mmm.
- [Uri] One day it's, uh...
1819
01:25:52,026 --> 01:25:54,195
"Have you heard about Felix?
1820
01:25:54,195 --> 01:25:56,155
"He's gone back home
to his family."
1821
01:25:56,197 --> 01:25:58,074
And then we hear
from the family.
1822
01:25:58,115 --> 01:25:59,325
Felix suddenly died from
1823
01:25:59,325 --> 01:26:00,868
lung cancer
or something ridiculous.
1824
01:26:00,868 --> 01:26:02,870
Yeah. We knew the truth.
1825
01:26:02,870 --> 01:26:06,123
[Uri] But you didn't really
know in those early days.
1826
01:26:06,123 --> 01:26:10,127
You were constantly checked,
but you were always scared.
1827
01:26:10,127 --> 01:26:11,337
[speaks Dutch]
1828
01:26:11,337 --> 01:26:12,922
Always fucking scared.
1829
01:26:15,257 --> 01:26:17,593
We went on holiday to Spain.
You were there?
1830
01:26:17,593 --> 01:26:19,512
- Yeah. Tom.
- Yeah.
1831
01:26:19,512 --> 01:26:20,930
- [Dede] And Jim.
- [Uri] Jim.
1832
01:26:20,930 --> 01:26:22,640
And we went to the gay beach.
1833
01:26:22,640 --> 01:26:23,974
There was this man,
1834
01:26:23,974 --> 01:26:27,019
very skeletal man,
with just his, uh...
1835
01:26:27,019 --> 01:26:28,771
...how do you call this,
swimming, uh...
1836
01:26:28,771 --> 01:26:31,482
- Swimmers.
- Swimmers, yeah.
1837
01:26:31,482 --> 01:26:35,236
And when he got up from
his bed to go to the sea,
1838
01:26:35,236 --> 01:26:38,864
you could see that he was
covered in Kaposi sarcoma.
1839
01:26:38,906 --> 01:26:40,241
[Frances] Hmm.
1840
01:26:40,241 --> 01:26:43,911
Honestly, all over his body.
It was horrible.
1841
01:26:43,911 --> 01:26:46,122
And I was thinking
what a horrible sight it was,
1842
01:26:46,122 --> 01:26:47,623
but at the same time, I thought,
1843
01:26:47,623 --> 01:26:50,292
no, but it's also brave
and it's also beautiful
1844
01:26:50,292 --> 01:26:52,920
that he felt comfortable
showing his body like this.
1845
01:26:54,296 --> 01:26:56,465
But Jim wasn't interested, no.
1846
01:26:56,465 --> 01:26:58,843
Jim just pointed to
a small purple spot
1847
01:26:58,843 --> 01:27:00,720
on Tom's neck or shoulder
1848
01:27:00,720 --> 01:27:02,221
and he said...
1849
01:27:04,056 --> 01:27:06,892
"You need to get that
checked, otherwise... eugh."
1850
01:27:06,892 --> 01:27:08,144
No!
1851
01:27:08,144 --> 01:27:09,687
He just never has
any fucking tact.
1852
01:27:09,687 --> 01:27:10,730
No tact.
1853
01:27:10,730 --> 01:27:11,981
[Emily] Like, none at all.
1854
01:27:11,981 --> 01:27:13,482
- [Dede] We were on the beach.
- [camera clicks]
1855
01:27:13,482 --> 01:27:15,317
There was no etiquette
about these things.
1856
01:27:15,317 --> 01:27:16,402
No.
1857
01:27:16,402 --> 01:27:18,237
But still, yeah,
it was... it was rude.
1858
01:27:18,237 --> 01:27:20,030
[laughs]
1859
01:27:20,030 --> 01:27:22,825
[Uri] Tom was kind of
a sensitive man,
1860
01:27:22,825 --> 01:27:23,993
unlike Jim.
1861
01:27:23,993 --> 01:27:24,952
[chuckles softly]
1862
01:27:24,952 --> 01:27:26,537
And he said, "Well, thanks, Jim.
1863
01:27:26,537 --> 01:27:29,498
"Thank you very much
for ruining my holiday.
1864
01:27:29,498 --> 01:27:31,584
- "Muchas gracias, darling."
- [laughter]
1865
01:27:31,584 --> 01:27:34,712
But he did have it.
1866
01:27:34,712 --> 01:27:36,422
- [Emily] Ohh.
- [Uri] He did have it, yes.
1867
01:27:36,422 --> 01:27:39,175
- Yes, and he did get a quilt.
- Yeah.
1868
01:27:40,468 --> 01:27:42,762
It's so... it's so horrific.
1869
01:27:45,222 --> 01:27:49,018
[laughs] Sorry. It's terrible.
1870
01:27:49,018 --> 01:27:50,895
Sorry, I'm sorry.
1871
01:27:50,895 --> 01:27:55,149
It's a terrible story. It's
not funny at all. It's not.
1872
01:27:55,149 --> 01:27:58,068
I don't even know
why I'm laughing about it.
1873
01:27:58,068 --> 01:28:00,237
[laughs]
1874
01:28:07,119 --> 01:28:08,829
[sobs]
1875
01:28:08,829 --> 01:28:10,539
Sorry.
1876
01:28:13,501 --> 01:28:15,127
[sighs]
1877
01:28:15,127 --> 01:28:17,880
Oh, God, I just
don't want him to die.
1878
01:28:24,094 --> 01:28:26,096
[Emily] But I do need
more wine, so...
1879
01:28:26,096 --> 01:28:28,432
- [Mark] Coming up.
- [Emily chuckles]
1880
01:28:28,432 --> 01:28:31,101
- [Emily sniffles and sighs]
- [metallic object clangs]
1881
01:28:33,270 --> 01:28:35,606
[Emily] Thank you.
[chuckles] Thank you, sir.
1882
01:28:35,606 --> 01:28:37,316
[Emily laughs sadly]
1883
01:28:38,567 --> 01:28:40,820
I think that... Yeah.
1884
01:28:40,820 --> 01:28:42,822
- [sombre music]
- [seagull cries]
1885
01:28:51,080 --> 01:28:52,748
I do, you know.
1886
01:28:52,748 --> 01:28:54,166
[Richard] What?
1887
01:28:54,166 --> 01:28:56,293
Want him to die.
1888
01:29:01,674 --> 01:29:03,676
Because you don't need him
like they do.
1889
01:29:11,559 --> 01:29:13,060
He thinks we have a thing.
1890
01:29:13,060 --> 01:29:15,604
[both chuckle]
1891
01:29:15,604 --> 01:29:17,398
[Richard] I know. [chuckles]
1892
01:29:23,153 --> 01:29:25,739
Dark pink skin on the knuckles.
1893
01:29:26,949 --> 01:29:28,909
Prominent tendons.
1894
01:29:30,494 --> 01:29:31,745
Little cut.
1895
01:29:31,745 --> 01:29:33,330
[Richard] Hmm!
1896
01:29:33,330 --> 01:29:36,667
There's a few dark hairs
on the outside of the hand.
1897
01:30:03,027 --> 01:30:05,487
Be grateful and fucking move on.
1898
01:30:11,118 --> 01:30:13,996
[somber music continues]
1899
01:30:17,917 --> 01:30:20,294
[water drips]
1900
01:30:31,847 --> 01:30:35,184
Do you think Emily knows
Jimpa better than you do?
1901
01:30:37,686 --> 01:30:39,104
Do you?
1902
01:30:42,650 --> 01:30:45,986
Emily's lived with or close
to Jimpa her whole life
1903
01:30:45,986 --> 01:30:49,198
so she's got a... different
relationship to him
1904
01:30:49,239 --> 01:30:50,699
than the one we have.
1905
01:30:50,699 --> 01:30:52,242
[Frances] We have?
1906
01:30:52,242 --> 01:30:53,577
What's that?
1907
01:30:53,577 --> 01:30:55,496
Long-distance.
1908
01:30:56,830 --> 01:30:58,248
[Frances] Mm.
1909
01:31:00,167 --> 01:31:02,086
I just wanna know
what Jimpa wants.
1910
01:31:03,837 --> 01:31:05,589
You don't think
I know what he wants?
1911
01:31:08,300 --> 01:31:10,344
The story you tell
1912
01:31:10,344 --> 01:31:13,889
about how he eventually had
to leave to come to Amsterdam,
1913
01:31:13,889 --> 01:31:17,393
about how Grandma decided it
was best to stay in Adelaide.
1914
01:31:18,394 --> 01:31:19,478
Yeah?
1915
01:31:21,939 --> 01:31:23,190
It's not true.
1916
01:31:24,650 --> 01:31:26,944
Grandma said to Jim that
she could come with him
1917
01:31:26,944 --> 01:31:28,404
and bring the kids.
1918
01:31:28,404 --> 01:31:30,114
You could all
move here together.
1919
01:31:31,281 --> 01:31:33,033
And Jimpa said no.
1920
01:31:33,951 --> 01:31:35,953
He said he wanted
to do it on his own.
1921
01:31:37,913 --> 01:31:39,373
He could have
1922
01:31:39,373 --> 01:31:41,375
brought you all with him
1923
01:31:41,375 --> 01:31:43,127
but he didn't want to.
1924
01:31:47,464 --> 01:31:48,966
Is that what he said to you?
1925
01:31:50,759 --> 01:31:52,136
Do you think he was lying?
1926
01:31:54,847 --> 01:31:56,306
No, I don't think he was.
1927
01:32:03,856 --> 01:32:05,691
Are you and Dad monogamous?
1928
01:32:08,736 --> 01:32:09,987
Mostly.
1929
01:32:11,697 --> 01:32:13,282
Why don't you talk about it?
1930
01:32:17,369 --> 01:32:19,329
I'm not as open as Jimpa.
1931
01:32:22,082 --> 01:32:23,375
Hmm.
1932
01:32:28,422 --> 01:32:30,215
[water splashes]
1933
01:32:30,215 --> 01:32:32,885
[footsteps]
1934
01:32:43,562 --> 01:32:46,273
And you were Director of
Public Health for five years.
1935
01:32:46,273 --> 01:32:47,566
Do you remember that?
1936
01:32:49,026 --> 01:32:50,569
Yeah? And...
1937
01:32:51,987 --> 01:32:53,363
[whispers] Thank you.
1938
01:32:56,992 --> 01:33:00,204
And... and...
1939
01:33:07,211 --> 01:33:08,962
Emily's here.
1940
01:33:14,551 --> 01:33:16,720
[Emily] Hannah,
you don't have to do it.
1941
01:33:16,720 --> 01:33:18,347
No shit. I'm not eating ham.
1942
01:33:18,347 --> 01:33:20,224
What? Fuck.
1943
01:33:20,224 --> 01:33:22,935
No, Hannah,
I'm talking about our dad.
1944
01:33:22,935 --> 01:33:25,896
No, it won't be me
that actually kills him.
1945
01:33:25,896 --> 01:33:28,899
Fucking hell, Hannah. I'm...
1946
01:33:28,899 --> 01:33:31,443
I mean that you don't
have to look after him.
1947
01:33:31,443 --> 01:33:33,862
If that's what scares you,
I will do that. You know this.
1948
01:33:33,862 --> 01:33:35,489
You're not gonna
have to give up anything.
1949
01:33:35,489 --> 01:33:36,490
Emily.
1950
01:33:36,532 --> 01:33:38,575
No, it's my fucking life.
1951
01:33:41,870 --> 01:33:43,413
I can help.
1952
01:33:43,413 --> 01:33:45,415
I can stay here
and live with them.
1953
01:33:45,415 --> 01:33:47,209
Jimpa would love it and...
1954
01:33:47,209 --> 01:33:50,462
...I can properly experience
this place.
1955
01:33:50,462 --> 01:33:51,922
- [Harry] No.
- [Frances] Why not?
1956
01:33:51,922 --> 01:33:54,091
You were ready to let me
live with him before.
1957
01:33:54,091 --> 01:33:56,218
No, no, not necessarily.
1958
01:33:57,344 --> 01:33:58,720
[Frances] You weren't?
1959
01:34:02,015 --> 01:34:03,433
Hannah, can you please
say something?
1960
01:34:05,602 --> 01:34:07,396
It's not what he wants.
1961
01:34:11,233 --> 01:34:12,651
It's OK, Mum.
1962
01:34:12,651 --> 01:34:15,529
Sorry, don't take this
as hostile, but I need to go.
1963
01:34:15,529 --> 01:34:16,947
Go for a walk.
1964
01:34:21,994 --> 01:34:23,078
[door closes]
1965
01:34:27,166 --> 01:34:30,294
[song]♪ It's gone too far
To ever go back ♪
1966
01:34:30,294 --> 01:34:32,171
♪ You know I wouldn't
Give you up ♪
1967
01:34:32,171 --> 01:34:35,174
♪ But, baby, I don't want that
♪
1968
01:34:40,721 --> 01:34:45,017
♪ it hits you so hard
To be so good ♪
1969
01:34:45,017 --> 01:34:50,105
♪ You know you keep so still
And maybe it's a kind of flak ♪
1970
01:34:51,690 --> 01:34:55,152
♪ Maybe it's the reason
That I'm back ♪
1971
01:34:55,152 --> 01:34:59,072
♪ Maybe it's alright ♪
1972
01:34:59,072 --> 01:35:02,868
♪ Maybe I've always
Been this kind ♪
1973
01:35:02,868 --> 01:35:05,287
♪ Baby, it's too hard ♪
1974
01:35:05,287 --> 01:35:09,499
♪ I'm too scarred
For this to work again ♪
1975
01:35:10,751 --> 01:35:14,671
♪ But you know I still wake up
With you every morning ♪
1976
01:35:14,671 --> 01:35:16,673
♪ Like I'm still dead ♪
1977
01:35:16,673 --> 01:35:19,176
[indistinct chatter]
1978
01:35:19,176 --> 01:35:22,846
♪ I heard
She's running out again ♪
1979
01:35:22,846 --> 01:35:25,807
♪ I know you're over that ♪
1980
01:35:25,807 --> 01:35:29,436
♪ I know that look
You didn't want ♪
1981
01:35:29,436 --> 01:35:31,813
♪ You're all I've got ♪
1982
01:35:31,813 --> 01:35:35,943
♪ I heard you're fired up again
♪
1983
01:35:35,943 --> 01:35:39,279
♪ I know something
Doesn't feel right ♪
1984
01:35:39,279 --> 01:35:42,699
♪ You know it's gotta feel
Right ♪
1985
01:35:44,534 --> 01:35:47,120
♪ It's not the same now ♪
1986
01:35:47,120 --> 01:35:52,668
♪ But for a while
This feeling hasn't changed ♪
1987
01:35:58,340 --> 01:36:02,344
♪ it hits me so hard
To feel so grey ♪
1988
01:36:02,344 --> 01:36:04,012
♪ You know you kept so clean ♪
1989
01:36:04,012 --> 01:36:07,099
♪ There was a reason
That you didn't stay ♪
1990
01:36:09,017 --> 01:36:12,854
♪ Maybe it's the reason
You're so glazed ♪
1991
01:36:12,854 --> 01:36:14,982
♪ Maybe it's alright ♪
1992
01:36:16,400 --> 01:36:20,153
♪ Maybe I've always been
So afraid ♪
1993
01:36:20,153 --> 01:36:22,614
♪ Baby, it's too hard ♪
1994
01:36:22,614 --> 01:36:26,702
♪ I'm too scarred for this
To work again ♪
1995
01:36:27,953 --> 01:36:31,748
♪ But you know I still wake up
With you every morning ♪
1996
01:36:31,748 --> 01:36:34,001
♪ Like we're still dead ♪
1997
01:36:36,211 --> 01:36:40,215
♪ I heard
She's running out again ♪
1998
01:36:40,215 --> 01:36:43,385
♪ I know you're over that ♪
1999
01:36:43,385 --> 01:36:46,513
♪ I know that look,
You did it wrong ♪
2000
01:36:46,513 --> 01:36:49,141
♪ You're all I've got ♪
2001
01:36:49,141 --> 01:36:53,020
♪ I heard you fucked it up
Again ♪
2002
01:36:53,020 --> 01:36:56,690
♪ I know something
Doesn't feel right ♪
2003
01:36:56,690 --> 01:37:00,110
♪ You know it's gotta feel
Right ♪
2004
01:37:01,778 --> 01:37:05,949
♪ I heard
She's running out again ♪
2005
01:37:05,949 --> 01:37:08,994
♪ I know you're over that ♪
2006
01:37:08,994 --> 01:37:12,414
♪ I know that look,
You did it wrong ♪
2007
01:37:12,414 --> 01:37:14,958
♪ You're all I got ♪
2008
01:37:14,958 --> 01:37:18,670
♪ I heard you fucked it up
Again ♪
2009
01:37:18,670 --> 01:37:22,341
♪ I know something
Doesn't feel right ♪
2010
01:37:22,341 --> 01:37:26,178
♪ You know
It's gotta feel right ♪
2011
01:37:32,976 --> 01:37:35,020
- Is that Stephen?
- Mmm.
2012
01:37:39,983 --> 01:37:41,693
[Hannah] What did you
say to him?
2013
01:37:41,693 --> 01:37:44,112
[Stephen] I told him he was
2014
01:37:44,112 --> 01:37:48,075
being stubborn
for not updating his will.
2015
01:37:48,075 --> 01:37:50,660
I told him I never wanted
anything from him
2016
01:37:50,660 --> 01:37:52,913
except for his constancy
2017
01:37:52,913 --> 01:37:55,791
and that was the one thing
he refused to give me.
2018
01:37:56,792 --> 01:37:59,086
And I asked him what's the use
2019
01:37:59,086 --> 01:38:02,547
of all of his ideals
and opinions
2020
01:38:02,547 --> 01:38:05,801
if he can't give the people
he loves what they need.
2021
01:38:09,096 --> 01:38:12,140
You know,
you're allowed to be angry
2022
01:38:12,140 --> 01:38:13,725
or disappointed by him
2023
01:38:13,725 --> 01:38:15,811
and still think
the world of him.
2024
01:38:15,811 --> 01:38:17,562
I know.
2025
01:38:17,562 --> 01:38:18,980
Are you sure?
2026
01:38:27,072 --> 01:38:28,824
I'm not sure if you
remember much about
2027
01:38:28,865 --> 01:38:31,868
what we talked about
the other day.
2028
01:38:31,868 --> 01:38:34,079
Or if you remember
much about anything.
2029
01:38:35,080 --> 01:38:36,623
But I'm Hannah,
2030
01:38:36,623 --> 01:38:38,875
your youngest daughter.
2031
01:38:38,875 --> 01:38:41,253
And a filmmaker.
2032
01:38:41,253 --> 01:38:43,171
A mother.
2033
01:38:43,171 --> 01:38:44,673
A woman.
2034
01:38:47,008 --> 01:38:49,344
And we have to decide
what to do with you today.
2035
01:38:57,102 --> 01:38:58,270
You tell me off
2036
01:38:58,270 --> 01:39:00,480
for not answering
my phone when you call.
2037
01:39:00,480 --> 01:39:03,650
And for not visiting enough
and for working too hard,
2038
01:39:03,650 --> 01:39:05,110
but you taught me
those things.
2039
01:39:06,820 --> 01:39:09,281
And I'm about to make
a film about you
2040
01:39:09,281 --> 01:39:11,324
and I kept saying
I couldn't visit yet
2041
01:39:11,324 --> 01:39:12,826
and you kept saying to
2042
01:39:12,826 --> 01:39:14,244
block out the time in my diary
2043
01:39:14,244 --> 01:39:15,912
and just to tell everyone
I'm working with
2044
01:39:15,912 --> 01:39:18,498
that it's happening
and to come for a visit.
2045
01:39:21,293 --> 01:39:23,545
This is one way to keep me
around longer than planned!
2046
01:39:24,629 --> 01:39:25,797
[grunts]
2047
01:39:26,882 --> 01:39:28,717
Are you OK? Are you in any pain?
2048
01:39:33,096 --> 01:39:34,431
No? Good.
2049
01:39:37,517 --> 01:39:40,103
So I'm gonna tell you
about my film.
2050
01:39:40,103 --> 01:39:41,646
[younger Jim taps wineglass]
2051
01:39:42,731 --> 01:39:45,108
[Hannah] it starts in 1977...
2052
01:39:45,108 --> 01:39:46,776
- [guests clap]
- [laughs]
2053
01:39:46,776 --> 01:39:49,279
[Hannah] ...which is obviously
a different and difficult time
2054
01:39:49,279 --> 01:39:51,364
to come out as gay.
2055
01:39:51,364 --> 01:39:53,950
But it's extra hard
for my main character
2056
01:39:53,950 --> 01:39:55,452
because he's married,
2057
01:39:55,452 --> 01:39:58,038
with a toddler
and a newborn baby.
2058
01:39:58,038 --> 01:39:59,122
[camera clicks]
2059
01:39:59,122 --> 01:40:01,791
But he does tell his family.
2060
01:40:04,085 --> 01:40:05,879
And instead of conflict,
2061
01:40:05,879 --> 01:40:09,633
he and his wife work out
how to keep living together
2062
01:40:09,633 --> 01:40:11,885
and to raise
their two children.
2063
01:40:14,221 --> 01:40:17,432
They start creating
a different bond
2064
01:40:17,432 --> 01:40:20,644
where they co-parent
and they share a life and...
2065
01:40:20,644 --> 01:40:23,021
...both of them having
various relationships,
2066
01:40:23,021 --> 01:40:25,106
some good, some bad, and...
2067
01:40:26,191 --> 01:40:29,069
...they go on living like this
for over 10 years.
2068
01:40:30,111 --> 01:40:31,821
And, um...
2069
01:40:31,821 --> 01:40:33,198
...you know, they build
a home together,
2070
01:40:33,240 --> 01:40:35,992
they... cook biscuits.
2071
01:40:35,992 --> 01:40:37,410
They coach each other
through life
2072
01:40:37,410 --> 01:40:40,163
to make a good life,
a good family.
2073
01:40:42,082 --> 01:40:44,876
And because of this, their
youngest daughter grows up
2074
01:40:44,876 --> 01:40:49,422
seeing their dad as gay
and a father as one thing -
2075
01:40:49,422 --> 01:40:53,176
as one whole thing, with
no hidden or separated parts.
2076
01:40:55,345 --> 01:40:58,723
But then all this changes
when she turns 13.
2077
01:41:01,268 --> 01:41:03,061
The father is finding it harder
2078
01:41:03,061 --> 01:41:04,646
to get work in Adelaide.
2079
01:41:04,646 --> 01:41:07,732
He's considered too political,
too controversial,
2080
01:41:07,732 --> 01:41:10,402
and... he feels limited by
2081
01:41:10,402 --> 01:41:12,821
the views, the place,
the lifestyle,
2082
01:41:12,821 --> 01:41:14,698
and so he says
he needs to leave.
2083
01:41:18,702 --> 01:41:21,663
And so, just like that,
after 13 years, he leaves.
2084
01:41:21,663 --> 01:41:23,456
[Jim grunts]
2085
01:41:28,587 --> 01:41:31,298
[Jim groans]
2086
01:41:33,174 --> 01:41:34,467
[Jim sobs]
2087
01:41:36,052 --> 01:41:38,972
But instead of it being
a terrible decision...
2088
01:41:42,559 --> 01:41:44,811
...it's presented as
something wonderful...
2089
01:41:46,646 --> 01:41:48,773
...that will prove to open up
all their lives.
2090
01:41:50,275 --> 01:41:51,526
And it did.
2091
01:41:51,526 --> 01:41:54,821
[dreamy piano music]
2092
01:42:09,544 --> 01:42:13,048
[dreamy music continues]
2093
01:42:15,634 --> 01:42:17,010
[dreamy music continues]
2094
01:42:29,606 --> 01:42:31,775
[dreamy music continues]
2095
01:42:51,002 --> 01:42:52,379
[dreamy music fades]
2096
01:42:52,379 --> 01:42:54,089
So that's what the film's about.
2097
01:43:00,095 --> 01:43:01,596
It's about a daughter learning
2098
01:43:01,596 --> 01:43:03,973
to not need her father so much.
2099
01:43:09,187 --> 01:43:10,397
Because she doesn't want him
2100
01:43:10,397 --> 01:43:12,607
to stay at home
and cook biscuits for her.
2101
01:43:12,607 --> 01:43:14,776
[Hannah chuckles sadly]
2102
01:43:14,776 --> 01:43:16,403
And her being grateful for that.
2103
01:43:19,489 --> 01:43:20,657
[grunts softly]
2104
01:43:31,000 --> 01:43:32,085
[kisses]
2105
01:43:37,507 --> 01:43:39,467
[Frances]
Do you like that story, Jimpa?
2106
01:43:46,099 --> 01:43:48,101
And do you think it's true?
2107
01:43:56,317 --> 01:43:57,444
Jimpa.
2108
01:44:01,322 --> 01:44:03,533
Do you want to die now?
2109
01:44:12,917 --> 01:44:14,502
[Hannah whispers] Em...
2110
01:44:15,962 --> 01:44:17,130
[Emily] Hmm.
2111
01:44:28,183 --> 01:44:30,477
[water splashes]
2112
01:44:33,813 --> 01:44:36,691
[Frances] You've said goodbye
to him a hundred times.
2113
01:44:36,691 --> 01:44:37,942
He'll be OK, Mum.
2114
01:44:38,860 --> 01:44:41,780
I just don't want him to feel
alone. He must be so scared.
2115
01:44:54,542 --> 01:44:55,877
[camera clicks]
2116
01:45:27,951 --> 01:45:30,662
[chuckles]
2117
01:45:42,632 --> 01:45:45,927
[phone buzzes]
2118
01:45:49,806 --> 01:45:50,890
Hello?
2119
01:45:51,891 --> 01:45:53,935
[gentle piano music]
2120
01:46:32,098 --> 01:46:34,809
[Frances] Jimpa always
thought he was right.
2121
01:46:34,809 --> 01:46:35,977
[people chuckle]
2122
01:46:35,977 --> 01:46:37,353
[Frances]
You might have heard him say,
2123
01:46:37,353 --> 01:46:39,063
"I'm not often wrong
and I'm right this time."
2124
01:46:39,063 --> 01:46:40,398
[people chuckle]
2125
01:46:40,398 --> 01:46:42,734
[Frances] But he did
change his mind sometimes.
2126
01:46:42,734 --> 01:46:44,861
He was just used to
fighting for it.
2127
01:46:46,613 --> 01:46:50,241
He told me recently
he was selfish.
2128
01:46:50,283 --> 01:46:53,244
And it's true that
he could be careless.
2129
01:46:53,244 --> 01:46:54,996
He hurt people.
2130
01:46:54,996 --> 01:46:56,372
[chuckles]
2131
01:46:57,624 --> 01:47:00,126
I always said he was my hero.
2132
01:47:01,753 --> 01:47:03,922
But I didn't really know him
that well.
2133
01:47:06,007 --> 01:47:08,468
I just had an idea of him.
2134
01:47:11,763 --> 01:47:14,265
I'm grateful for that idea.
2135
01:47:29,989 --> 01:47:31,991
[inhales deeply]
2136
01:47:33,284 --> 01:47:34,577
[chuckles softly]
2137
01:47:35,828 --> 01:47:37,789
I love you.
2138
01:47:39,165 --> 01:47:40,750
I love you too.
2139
01:47:52,053 --> 01:47:53,596
You're my hero.
2140
01:48:00,436 --> 01:48:03,606
['True Blue' by Boygenius]
2141
01:48:12,323 --> 01:48:16,119
♪ You said you wanted
To feel alive ♪
2142
01:48:16,119 --> 01:48:19,080
♪ So we went to the beach ♪
2143
01:48:19,080 --> 01:48:22,667
♪ You were born in July '95 ♪
2144
01:48:22,667 --> 01:48:25,795
♪ In a deadly heat ♪
2145
01:48:25,795 --> 01:48:29,882
♪ You say you're a winter bitch
♪
2146
01:48:29,882 --> 01:48:32,260
♪ But summer's in your blood ♪
2147
01:48:32,260 --> 01:48:37,682
♪ You can't help but become
The sun ♪
2148
01:48:42,270 --> 01:48:45,732
♪ And it feels good ♪
2149
01:48:45,732 --> 01:48:49,152
♪ To be known ♪
2150
01:48:49,152 --> 01:48:52,321
♪ So well ♪
2151
01:48:54,866 --> 01:48:59,245
♪ I can't hide from you ♪
2152
01:48:59,245 --> 01:49:03,666
♪ Like I hide from myself ♪
2153
01:49:08,171 --> 01:49:13,843
♪ I remember who I am ♪
2154
01:49:13,843 --> 01:49:17,388
♪ When I'm with you ♪
2155
01:49:20,808 --> 01:49:23,936
♪ Your love is tough ♪
2156
01:49:23,936 --> 01:49:29,692
♪ Your love is
Tried and true blue ♪
2157
01:49:34,947 --> 01:49:38,117
♪ Blue ♪
2158
01:49:40,161 --> 01:49:42,538
['I Know A Place' by Muna]
2159
01:49:44,290 --> 01:49:46,209
♪ I knew ♪
2160
01:49:46,209 --> 01:49:50,838
♪ When you told me you don't
Wanna go home tonight ♪
2161
01:49:50,838 --> 01:49:52,799
♪ And you tried
To just shrug it off ♪
2162
01:49:52,799 --> 01:49:54,717
♪ When I asked you why ♪
2163
01:49:54,717 --> 01:49:59,388
♪ Somebody hurt you ♪
2164
01:49:59,388 --> 01:50:01,933
♪ But you're here by my side ♪
2165
01:50:01,933 --> 01:50:04,685
♪ And I knew ♪
2166
01:50:04,685 --> 01:50:09,232
♪ 'Cause I can recall when
I was the one in your seat ♪
2167
01:50:09,232 --> 01:50:13,152
♪ I still got the scars
And they occasionally bleed ♪
2168
01:50:13,152 --> 01:50:15,404
♪ 'Cause somebody hurt me ♪
2169
01:50:15,404 --> 01:50:17,698
♪ Somebody hurt me ♪
2170
01:50:17,740 --> 01:50:19,992
♪ But I'm staying alive ♪
2171
01:50:19,992 --> 01:50:24,539
♪ And I can tell
When you get nervous ♪
2172
01:50:24,539 --> 01:50:29,085
♪ You think being yourself
Means being unworthy ♪
2173
01:50:29,085 --> 01:50:31,295
♪ And it's hard to love ♪
2174
01:50:31,295 --> 01:50:33,506
♪ With a heart that's hurting ♪
2175
01:50:33,506 --> 01:50:38,344
♪ But if you want
To go out dancing ♪
2176
01:50:38,344 --> 01:50:40,638
♪ I know a place ♪
2177
01:50:42,098 --> 01:50:46,519
♪ I know a place we can go ♪
2178
01:50:46,519 --> 01:50:50,815
♪ Where everyone's gonna
Lay down their weapon ♪
2179
01:50:50,815 --> 01:50:53,109
♪ Lay down their weapon ♪
2180
01:50:53,109 --> 01:50:57,530
♪ Just give me trust
And watch what will happen ♪
2181
01:50:57,530 --> 01:50:59,323
♪ I know ♪
2182
01:51:01,951 --> 01:51:04,245
♪ Right now ♪
2183
01:51:04,245 --> 01:51:08,291
♪ It's like you're carrying
All the weight of your past ♪
2184
01:51:08,291 --> 01:51:10,126
♪ I can see all your bruises ♪
2185
01:51:10,126 --> 01:51:12,461
♪ Yellow, dark blue and black ♪
2186
01:51:12,461 --> 01:51:15,173
♪ But, baby, a bruise is ♪
2187
01:51:15,173 --> 01:51:19,760
♪ Only your body
Trying to keep you intact ♪
2188
01:51:19,760 --> 01:51:22,555
- ♪ So right now ♪
- ♪ Right now ♪
2189
01:51:22,555 --> 01:51:26,684
♪ I think we should go
And get drunk on cheap wine ♪
2190
01:51:26,684 --> 01:51:30,938
♪ I think we should
Hop on the purple line ♪
2191
01:51:30,938 --> 01:51:33,232
♪ 'Cause maybe our purpose ♪
2192
01:51:33,232 --> 01:51:37,737
♪ ls to never give up
When we're on the right track ♪
2193
01:51:37,737 --> 01:51:42,158
♪ And I can tell
When you get nervous ♪
2194
01:51:42,200 --> 01:51:46,579
♪ You think being yourself
Means being unworthy ♪
2195
01:51:46,579 --> 01:51:49,081
♪ And it's hard to love ♪
2196
01:51:49,081 --> 01:51:51,626
♪ With a heart that's hurting ♪
2197
01:51:51,626 --> 01:51:56,130
♪ But if you want to
Go out dancing ♪
2198
01:51:56,130 --> 01:51:58,758
♪ I know a place ♪
2199
01:51:59,800 --> 01:52:02,887
♪ I know a place we can go ♪
2200
01:52:04,388 --> 01:52:08,517
♪ Where everyone's gonna
Lay down their weapon ♪
2201
01:52:08,517 --> 01:52:10,978
♪ Lay down their weapon ♪
2202
01:52:10,978 --> 01:52:15,107
♪ Don't you be afraid
Of love and affection ♪
2203
01:52:15,107 --> 01:52:17,568
♪ Just lay down your weapon ♪
2204
01:52:19,904 --> 01:52:23,282
♪ They will try to
Make you unhappy ♪
2205
01:52:23,282 --> 01:52:24,659
♪ Don't let them ♪
2206
01:52:24,867 --> 01:52:27,912
♪ They will try to tell you
You're not free ♪
2207
01:52:27,912 --> 01:52:29,038
♪ Don't listen ♪
2208
01:52:29,038 --> 01:52:30,998
♪ I, I know a place ♪
2209
01:52:30,998 --> 01:52:33,584
♪ Where you don't need
Protection ♪
2210
01:52:33,584 --> 01:52:38,130
♪ Even if it's only
In my imagination ♪
2211
01:52:38,130 --> 01:52:39,507
♪ I ♪
2212
01:52:40,883 --> 01:52:44,053
♪ I know a place we can go ♪
2213
01:52:45,638 --> 01:52:50,017
♪ Where everyone's gonna
Lay down their weapon ♪
2214
01:52:50,017 --> 01:52:52,186
♪ Lay down their weapon ♪
2215
01:52:52,186 --> 01:52:56,732
♪ Don't you be afraid
Of love and affection ♪
2216
01:52:56,732 --> 01:52:59,318
♪ Just lay down your weapon ♪
159247
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