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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,640 --> 00:00:03,750 Folks, um, we have done over 1,800 of 2 00:00:03,750 --> 00:00:03,760 Folks, um, we have done over 1,800 of 3 00:00:03,760 --> 00:00:06,670 Folks, um, we have done over 1,800 of these shows. And most nights I I come 4 00:00:06,670 --> 00:00:06,680 these shows. And most nights I I come 5 00:00:06,680 --> 00:00:08,390 these shows. And most nights I I come out here and I talk to the audience 6 00:00:08,390 --> 00:00:08,400 out here and I talk to the audience 7 00:00:08,400 --> 00:00:11,390 out here and I talk to the audience beforehand. And tonight I thought I'd 8 00:00:11,390 --> 00:00:11,400 beforehand. And tonight I thought I'd 9 00:00:11,400 --> 00:00:13,190 beforehand. And tonight I thought I'd talk to the audience in here and the 10 00:00:13,190 --> 00:00:13,200 talk to the audience in here and the 11 00:00:13,200 --> 00:00:15,950 talk to the audience in here and the audience out there at home. This show, I 12 00:00:15,950 --> 00:00:15,960 audience out there at home. This show, I 13 00:00:15,960 --> 00:00:17,870 audience out there at home. This show, I want you to know and you to know, has 14 00:00:17,870 --> 00:00:17,880 want you to know and you to know, has 15 00:00:17,880 --> 00:00:20,030 want you to know and you to know, has been a joy for us to do for you. In 16 00:00:20,030 --> 00:00:20,040 been a joy for us to do for you. In 17 00:00:20,040 --> 00:00:22,470 been a joy for us to do for you. In fact, we call this show the joy machine, 18 00:00:22,470 --> 00:00:22,480 fact, we call this show the joy machine, 19 00:00:22,480 --> 00:00:24,670 fact, we call this show the joy machine, all right? Lewis stole it from us and we 20 00:00:24,670 --> 00:00:24,680 all right? Lewis stole it from us and we 21 00:00:24,680 --> 00:00:27,910 all right? Lewis stole it from us and we are currently in litigation right now. 22 00:00:27,910 --> 00:00:27,920 are currently in litigation right now. 23 00:00:27,920 --> 00:00:30,750 are currently in litigation right now. You better lawyer up, buddy. Um, 24 00:00:30,750 --> 00:00:30,760 You better lawyer up, buddy. Um, 25 00:00:30,760 --> 00:00:32,550 You better lawyer up, buddy. Um, we call it the joy machine because to do 26 00:00:32,550 --> 00:00:32,560 we call it the joy machine because to do 27 00:00:32,560 --> 00:00:35,150 we call it the joy machine because to do this many shows, um, it has to be a 28 00:00:35,150 --> 00:00:35,160 this many shows, um, it has to be a 29 00:00:35,160 --> 00:00:36,510 this many shows, um, it has to be a machine. Yeah. 30 00:00:36,510 --> 00:00:36,520 machine. Yeah. 31 00:00:36,520 --> 00:00:38,510 machine. Yeah. But the thing is, if you choose to do it 32 00:00:38,510 --> 00:00:38,520 But the thing is, if you choose to do it 33 00:00:38,520 --> 00:00:40,190 But the thing is, if you choose to do it with joy, it doesn't hurt as much when 34 00:00:40,190 --> 00:00:40,200 with joy, it doesn't hurt as much when 35 00:00:40,200 --> 00:00:42,590 with joy, it doesn't hurt as much when your fingers get caught in the gears. 36 00:00:42,590 --> 00:00:42,600 your fingers get caught in the gears. 37 00:00:42,600 --> 00:00:44,710 your fingers get caught in the gears. And and I cannot adequately explain to 38 00:00:44,710 --> 00:00:44,720 And and I cannot adequately explain to 39 00:00:44,720 --> 00:00:47,430 And and I cannot adequately explain to you what the people who work here 40 00:00:47,430 --> 00:00:47,440 you what the people who work here 41 00:00:47,440 --> 00:00:49,750 you what the people who work here have done for each other and how much we 42 00:00:49,750 --> 00:00:49,760 have done for each other and how much we 43 00:00:49,760 --> 00:00:50,710 have done for each other and how much we mean to each other. 44 00:00:50,710 --> 00:00:50,720 mean to each other. 45 00:00:50,720 --> 00:00:53,045 mean to each other. >> Yeah. So, I will just say, 46 00:00:53,045 --> 00:00:53,055 >> Yeah. So, I will just say, 47 00:00:53,055 --> 00:00:59,030 >> Yeah. So, I will just say, >> [applause] 48 00:00:59,030 --> 00:00:59,040 49 00:00:59,040 --> 00:01:00,910 >> I will just say to them, 50 00:01:00,910 --> 00:01:00,920 >> I will just say to them, 51 00:01:00,920 --> 00:01:02,870 >> I will just say to them, I will just say to them, you are all the 52 00:01:02,870 --> 00:01:02,880 I will just say to them, you are all the 53 00:01:02,880 --> 00:01:06,230 I will just say to them, you are all the great Achilles whom we knew. 54 00:01:06,230 --> 00:01:06,240 great Achilles whom we knew. 55 00:01:06,240 --> 00:01:08,430 great Achilles whom we knew. Now, on night one of the Colbert Report 56 00:01:08,430 --> 00:01:08,440 Now, on night one of the Colbert Report 57 00:01:08,440 --> 00:01:10,190 Now, on night one of the Colbert Report back in the day, I said anyone can read 58 00:01:10,190 --> 00:01:10,200 back in the day, I said anyone can read 59 00:01:10,200 --> 00:01:12,590 back in the day, I said anyone can read the news to you. I promised to feel the 60 00:01:12,590 --> 00:01:12,600 the news to you. I promised to feel the 61 00:01:12,600 --> 00:01:14,150 the news to you. I promised to feel the news at you. 62 00:01:14,150 --> 00:01:14,160 news at you. 63 00:01:14,160 --> 00:01:15,910 news at you. And, uh, 64 00:01:15,910 --> 00:01:15,920 And, uh, 65 00:01:15,920 --> 00:01:17,870 And, uh, I realized pretty soon in this job that 66 00:01:17,870 --> 00:01:17,880 I realized pretty soon in this job that 67 00:01:17,880 --> 00:01:19,550 I realized pretty soon in this job that our job over here was different. We were 68 00:01:19,550 --> 00:01:19,560 our job over here was different. We were 69 00:01:19,560 --> 00:01:21,830 our job over here was different. We were here to feel the news with you. 70 00:01:21,830 --> 00:01:21,840 here to feel the news with you. 71 00:01:21,840 --> 00:01:24,230 here to feel the news with you. And I don't know about you, but I sure 72 00:01:24,230 --> 00:01:24,240 And I don't know about you, but I sure 73 00:01:24,240 --> 00:01:26,270 And I don't know about you, but I sure have felt it. 74 00:01:26,270 --> 00:01:26,280 have felt it. 75 00:01:26,280 --> 00:01:27,670 have felt it. And I just want to let all y'all know, 76 00:01:27,670 --> 00:01:27,680 And I just want to let all y'all know, 77 00:01:27,680 --> 00:01:29,150 And I just want to let all y'all know, in here and out there, how important 78 00:01:29,150 --> 00:01:29,160 in here and out there, how important 79 00:01:29,160 --> 00:01:30,430 in here and out there, how important you've been 80 00:01:30,430 --> 00:01:30,440 you've been 81 00:01:30,440 --> 00:01:32,110 you've been to what we have done. 82 00:01:32,110 --> 00:01:32,120 to what we have done. 83 00:01:32,120 --> 00:01:33,590 to what we have done. The energy that you've given us, we 84 00:01:33,590 --> 00:01:33,600 The energy that you've given us, we 85 00:01:33,600 --> 00:01:35,550 The energy that you've given us, we sincerely need that to have done the 86 00:01:35,550 --> 00:01:35,560 sincerely need that to have done the 87 00:01:35,560 --> 00:01:37,590 sincerely need that to have done the best possible show we could have for you 88 00:01:37,590 --> 00:01:37,600 best possible show we could have for you 89 00:01:37,600 --> 00:01:39,110 best possible show we could have for you for the last 11 years. You've given it 90 00:01:39,110 --> 00:01:39,120 for the last 11 years. You've given it 91 00:01:39,120 --> 00:01:40,710 for the last 11 years. You've given it to us, we've given it all right back to 92 00:01:40,710 --> 00:01:40,720 to us, we've given it all right back to 93 00:01:40,720 --> 00:01:43,110 to us, we've given it all right back to you. What would you call that, Lewis? I 94 00:01:43,110 --> 00:01:43,120 you. What would you call that, Lewis? I 95 00:01:43,120 --> 00:01:44,510 you. What would you call that, Lewis? I would call that 96 00:01:44,510 --> 00:01:44,520 would call that 97 00:01:44,520 --> 00:01:48,550 would call that a reciprocal emotional relationship. 98 00:01:48,550 --> 00:01:48,560 a reciprocal emotional relationship. 99 00:01:48,560 --> 00:01:50,790 a reciprocal emotional relationship. That's exactly right. Because we love 100 00:01:50,790 --> 00:01:50,800 That's exactly right. Because we love 101 00:01:50,800 --> 00:01:52,270 That's exactly right. Because we love doing this show for you, but what we 102 00:01:52,270 --> 00:01:52,280 doing this show for you, but what we 103 00:01:52,280 --> 00:01:54,510 doing this show for you, but what we really really love is doing this show 104 00:01:54,510 --> 00:01:54,520 really really love is doing this show 105 00:01:54,520 --> 00:01:56,030 really really love is doing this show with you. 106 00:01:56,030 --> 00:01:56,040 with you. 107 00:01:56,040 --> 00:01:57,950 with you. Now, 108 00:01:57,950 --> 00:01:57,960 Now, 109 00:01:57,960 --> 00:02:00,470 Now, I'll say you what I've said to every 110 00:02:00,470 --> 00:02:00,480 I'll say you what I've said to every 111 00:02:00,480 --> 00:02:02,150 I'll say you what I've said to every audience for the last 11 years, and I 112 00:02:02,150 --> 00:02:02,160 audience for the last 11 years, and I 113 00:02:02,160 --> 00:02:03,950 audience for the last 11 years, and I have meant it every time. 114 00:02:03,950 --> 00:02:03,960 have meant it every time. 115 00:02:03,960 --> 00:02:05,590 have meant it every time. Have a good show. 116 00:02:05,590 --> 00:02:05,600 Have a good show. 117 00:02:05,600 --> 00:02:07,550 Have a good show. Thanks for being here. 118 00:02:07,550 --> 00:02:07,560 Thanks for being here. 119 00:02:07,560 --> 00:02:10,991 Thanks for being here. And let's do it, y'all. Woo! 120 00:02:10,991 --> 00:02:11,001 And let's do it, y'all. Woo! 121 00:02:11,001 --> 00:02:16,886 >> [music] 122 00:02:16,886 --> 00:02:16,896 123 00:02:16,896 --> 00:02:21,471 [music] 124 00:02:21,471 --> 00:02:21,481 125 00:02:21,481 --> 00:02:22,190 [music] 126 00:02:22,190 --> 00:02:22,200 [music] 127 00:02:22,200 --> 00:02:23,436 [music] >> Woo! 128 00:02:23,436 --> 00:02:23,446 >> Woo! 129 00:02:23,446 --> 00:02:24,091 >> Woo! >> [cheering] 130 00:02:24,091 --> 00:02:24,101 >> [cheering] 131 00:02:24,101 --> 00:02:26,121 >> [cheering] [applause] 10644

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