Original subtitles

Woman: AT THIS POINT, I'M JUST KILLING MYSELF SLOWLY, DAY BY DAY.

**

[ BOTH GRUNTING ]

Woman: MY LIFE IS WASTING AWAY, AND I HATE IT.

Woman: I TRIED TO CHANGE, BUT SOMETHING ALWAYS KNOCKS ME DOWN.

**

Man: MY LIFE, IT'S LIKE A LIVING DEATH SENTENCE.

UGH! OOH.

OW! [BLEEP]

THIS IS NO LIFE FOR ANYONE.

**

Woman: OH, JUST PRAY FOR ME.

Woman: AAH! DON'T HURT MY LEG!

-SIT DOWN RIGHT THERE. -WAIT.

YOU'RE MAKING ME MAD.

ALL RIGHT. THIS IS COMPLETELY UNACCEPTABLE.

**

WAIT. JUST LET ME GO FOR A MINUTE.

I'M TRYING TO KEEP YOU FROM FALLING ON THE [BLEEP] FLOOR.

OW! OW, MY LEG!

-- Captions by VITAC -- www.vitac.com

CAPTIONS PAID FOR BY DISCOVERY COMMUNICATIONS

**

Renee: WHEN YOU'RE STANDING ON THE GROUND,

YOU CAN'T ALWAYS SEE THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN.

BUT IF YOU KEEP CLIMBING, YOU WILL REACH IT.

**

**

[ BED CREAKING ]

WHEN I WAKE UP IN THE MORNING,

I KNOW I MADE IT THROUGH ANOTHER NIGHT,

BECAUSE THE PAIN IS THERE TO REMIND ME THAT I'M STILL ALIVE.

[ SIGHS ]

GETTING OUT OF BED FOR ME IS VERY PAINFUL.

FROM MY BACK TO MY LEGS,

IT'S JUST PAIN THAT I CAN'T EVEN DESCRIBE.

AND EVERY DAY, IT GETS HARDER TO MOVE AND HARDER TO BREATHE.

**

I DREAD WHEN I HAVE TO JUST EVEN TAKE A SHOWER

BECAUSE I KNOW I GOT TO STAND UP AND WALK, AND IT'S JUST HARD.

I CAN'T STAND UP FOR OVER FIVE MINUTES.

I BREAK OUT INTO A SWEAT, AND MY LOWER BACK FEELS LIKE

THERE'S A HOT KNIFE STICKING ME.

**

EVERY STEP IS PAINFUL.

**

AND I'M SCARED.

I'M ALWAYS SCARED THAT I'M GONNA FALL.

BUT I HAVE TO DO IT BECAUSE BEING A BIGGER PERSON,

YOU ALWAYS WORRY ABOUT YOUR HYGIENE

AND KEEPING CLEAN AND NOT SMELLING AND EVERYTHING.

**

AND IF IT WEREN'T FOR THE HELP FROM MY DAUGHTER, MONIQUE,

I DON'T KNOW HOW I WOULD SURVIVE.

**

MY KIDS DO BASICALLY EVERYTHING FOR ME.

Monique: IT'S HARD TO BE A CARETAKER FOR MY MOM,

BUT SOMEBODY HAS TO DO IT.

SHE NEEDS US, SO WE TRY TO HELP HER AS MUCH AS WE CAN.

**

Renee: IT'S VERY HUMILIATING FOR ME TO HAVE TO ASK MY DAUGHTER

TO HELP ME IN THE SHOWER,

BECAUSE I REMEMBER BATHING HER WHEN SHE WAS A BABY.

SHE SHOULDN'T HAVE TO HELP BATHE ME,

BUT THERE'S JUST SOME SPOTS THAT I CAN'T REACH ANYMORE.

MY KIDS WOULD NEVER SHOW IT, BUT I KNOW MY WEIGHT AFFECTS THEM,

BECAUSE THEY HAVE TO PUT OFF SOME OF THE THINGS

THAT THEY'RE DOING JUST TO MAKE SURE MY NEEDS ARE TAKEN CARE OF.

I WORRY ABOUT LOSING THE ABILITY

TO BE ABLE TO CLEAN MYSELF AT ALL

OR KEEPING UP WHAT HYGIENE THAT I HAVE.

THAT'S A FEAR OF MINE.

**

I RESENT THE THINGS I HAVE TO DO FOR MY MOM

BECAUSE THE MOM'S SUPPOSED TO ALWAYS DO FOR YOU,

AND I TAKE CARE OF MY MOM MORE THAN MY MOM TAKES CARE OF ME.

OH!

OKAY.

**

Renee: BUT I NEED THEM.

**

BECAUSE I CAN'T DO ANYTHING FOR MYSELF.

**

IF I HAD TO DESCRIBE THE LIFE THAT I'M LIVING RIGHT NOW...

I FEEL WORTHLESS.

I FEEL LIKE I'M A PRISONER IN MY OWN BODY,

AND I KNOW I'M NOT REALLY LIVING.

I'M JUST EXISTING.

BUT I NEVER THOUGHT I WOULD BE LIKE THIS.

**

ALL MY LIFE, I FELT LIKE I WAS THE OUTCAST IN THE FAMILY

BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, I HAD A DIFFERENT FATHER

THAN MY BROTHERS AND SISTERS.

MY MOM HAD AN AFFAIR WITH HER BEST FRIEND'S HUSBAND,

AND I BECAME A PRODUCT OF THAT AFFAIR.

I THINK SHE WAS EMBARRASSED AND ASHAMED OF WHAT SHE HAD DONE,

AND SHE TOOK ALL THAT OUT ON ME.

I NEVER FELT LIKE MY MOM LOVED ME,

EVEN TO THIS DAY.

I'M 53 YEARS OLD, AND I CAN'T RECALL A TIME OF EVER FEELING

LIKE MY MOM EVER LOVED ME.

WHEN I WAS 5, MY GRANDMOTHER SAW HOW UNHAPPY I WAS,

AND SHE WOULD TRY TO USE FOOD TO COMFORT ME.

ONE OF MY BEST MEMORIES AS A KID IS BEING WITH MY GRANDMA.

WHEN WE WOULD GO TO BED AT NIGHT, WE WOULD LAY IN BED

AND READ AND EAT GINGER SNAPS.

IT WAS ONE OF THE FEW THINGS THAT MADE ME HAPPY,

BUT THINGS WENT DOWNHILL FROM THERE.

AND WHEN I WAS 9, MY STEPDAD STARTED MOLESTING ME.

MY MOM KNEW EVERYTHING THAT WAS GOING ON.

THERE WAS TIMES WHEN I WOULD SEE HER, AND SHE WAS WATCHING,

SO I KNOW SHE KNEW, BUT SHE DIDN'T CARE ENOUGH TO STOP IT.

I GUESS SHE JUST DIDN'T CARE ENOUGH ABOUT ME,

AND IT HURT ME AS A CHILD

WHEN I FELT LIKE MY MOM WOULDN'T PROTECT ME.

I HAD NOBODY TO TALK TO, NOWHERE TO TURN,

SO I TURNED TO FOOD TO ESCAPE THE PAIN.

I WAS GAINING WEIGHT, AND BY THE TIME I WAS 11,

I WEIGHED ALMOST 200 POUNDS.

ALL THE KIDS WOULD LAUGH AND TEASE AT ME BECAUSE, YOU KNOW,

I WAS THE BIGGEST ONE.

THEY ALWAYS PICKED ON ME.

SCHOOL WAS TERRIBLE, BUT BEING AT HOME WAS A NIGHTMARE,

BECAUSE THE MOLESTATION DIDN'T STOP

UNTIL I WAS 14, WHEN MY STEPDAD LEFT MY MOM.

AND BY THAT TIME, MY WEIGHT WAS UP TO 280 POUNDS.

WHEN I WAS IN JUNIOR HIGH, I LOVED MY SIZE THEN.

BECAUSE I WAS CURVY,

I STARTED GETTING A LOT OF ATTENTION FROM BOYS.

AND WHEN I WAS 15, I FOUND OUT

THAT I WAS PREGNANT WITH MY FIRST CHILD,

SO I ENDED UP DROPPING OUT OF HIGH SCHOOL TO HAVE MY DAUGHTER.

I WAS WEIGHING, LIKE, OVER 300 POUNDS,

AND THE DOCTORS SAID THAT I WAS GROSSLY OBESE,

BUT I DIDN'T LET IT AFFECT ME

BECAUSE I BLAMED IT ON BEING PREGNANT.

**

AFTER OUR DAUGHTER WAS BORN, HER FATHER AND I GOT MARRIED.

THINGS WERE GOOD FOR A WHILE,

BUT AFTER I HAD OUR SECOND CHILD, HE STARTED ABUSING ME.

THE ABUSE WAS AWFUL.

I MEAN, THERE WAS TIMES WHEN I HAD BLACK EYES AND BUSTED LIPS,

AND ONE TIME, HE BROKE MY NOSE

SO SEVERELY THAT I HAD TO HAVE AN OPERATION ON IT.

Monique: THINGS WAS VERY HARD FOR MY FAMILY GROWING UP.

YOU NEVER WANT TO SEE YOUR MOM BEING HURT,

SO YOU GET USED TO IT, BUT IT'S NEVER OKAY.

IT WAS DEVASTATING BEING ABUSED, BUT I THINK

I WAS SORT OF KIND OF USED TO BEING ABUSED

BECAUSE OF EVERYTHING THAT I'VE BEEN THROUGH IN MY CHILDHOOD.

I DEALT WITH THE ABUSE THE SAME WAY

I DID WHEN I WAS A KID -- WITH FOOD.

AND MY WEIGHT KEPT GOING UP.

BY THE TIME I WAS IN MY MID-20s, I WAS ALMOST 400 POUNDS.

FINALLY, ME AND MY HUSBAND GOT DIVORCED.

I HAD FOUR CHILDREN BY MY FIRST HUSBAND.

AFTER THAT, I HAD TWO MORE BOYFRIENDS,

AND I HAD A CHILD BY EACH ONE.

AND THE MORE I HAD CHILDREN, THE HIGHER MY WEIGHT GOT.

BY THE TIME I WAS PREGNANT WITH MY SIXTH CHILD,

I WAS OVER 400 POUNDS.

I WORKED WHATEVER JOBS I COULD TO SUPPORT MY FAMILY.

MOST OF THE JOBS I COULD FIND WERE IN FACTORIES,

AND THAT WAS DIFFICULT BEING AS BIG AS I WAS.

IT WAS ALL THAT I COULD DO TO GET THE JOB DONE

SO THAT I COULD PROVIDE FOR THEM.

WHEN I WAS YOUNG, SHE WORKED HARD.

SHE MADE SURE WE ATE, HAD CLOTHES, WENT TO SCHOOL.

SHE WAS A DEVOTED MOTHER.

I WAS EATING FAST FOOD ALL THE TIME, AND BY THE TIME

I WAS IN MY MID-30s,

I WEIGHED OVER 450 POUNDS.

AND THEN I GOT INJURED IN A CAR ACCIDENT

WHILE I WAS WORKING IN THE SEWING FACTORY.

AND IT ENDED UP INJURING MY BACK SO BAD

THAT I COULDN'T REALLY SIT UP.

SO THERE WENT THAT JOB.

I NEEDED A WAY TO MAKE MONEY,

AND THAT'S WHEN I DISCOVERED THE INTERNET.

NOT ONLY DID I FIND OUT THAT THERE WAS MEN OUT THERE

THAT LIKED BIG WOMEN,

BUT THERE WAS ALSO MEN OUT THERE THAT LOVED TO WATCH WOMEN EAT.

THEY'RE CALLED FEEDERS.

IN THE FEEDERISM WORLD, THE FEEDER IS THE PERSON

THAT PROVIDES THE FOOD.

A FEEDEE IS SOMEONE THAT WOULD EAT THE FOOD.

SO THEY WOULD PAY ME TO EAT WHILE THEY WATCHED ONLINE,

AND AS A SINGLE MOM,

I FOUND A WAY TO FEED MY CHILDREN

AND KEEP A ROOF OVER MY KIDS' HEAD BY BEING A FEEDEE.

AND FEEDING LED ME TO DISCOVER SQUASHING.

SQUASHING IS SOMETHING WHERE SOMEBODY PAYS YOU TO SIT ON 'EM.

THEY WOULD WANT SOMEONE TO SIT ON THEM

BECAUSE THAT WAS THEIR WAY OF LOSING CONTROL.

BUT FOR ME, IT MEANT I COULD SUPPORT MY FAMILY.

AND WHEN I WAS IN FEEDING AND SQUASHING, AT FIRST,

IT WAS ALL FUN AND GAMES,

BECAUSE I WAS GETTING PAID TO DO WHAT I LOVED BEST --

EATING GOOD FOOD.

BUT MY WEIGHT JUST GOT MORE AND MORE OUT OF CONTROL.

AND BY THE TIME I WAS 45, I WAS OVER 500 POUNDS.

**

MY HEALTH STARTED TO FALL APART.

I WAS LIVING ALONE,

BUT I STARTED LOSING MY BALANCE AND FALLING,

AND I WOULD HAVE TO CALL EMTs TO HELP ME COME

AND GET UP OFF THE FLOOR.

AND I REALIZED THAT MY BODY HAD GOTTEN SO BIG,

AND I WAS UNABLE TO TAKE CARE OF MYSELF.

SO IN MY EARLY 50s,

I HAD TO MOVE IN WITH MY TWO OLDEST CHILDREN

TO HELP TAKE CARE OF ME.

NOW, I ALMOST NEVER LEAVE THE HOUSE,

AND I'M BASICALLY STUCK IN THIS BED.

I CAN'T DO ANYTHING FOR MYSELF,

SO MY KIDS PROVIDE ALL THE HELP THAT I NEED.

FROM HYGIENE TO COOKING, THEY DO EVERYTHING FOR ME.

**

Monique: SHE DON'T REALLY COME OUT OF HER ROOM,

SO EVERYTHING HAS TO BE BROUGHT TO HER.

AND SHE'S NOT SATISFIED UNLESS SHE'S EATING.

AND ME AND ALL MY SIBLINGS PROBABLY ENABLE MY MOM

BECAUSE WE DON'T WANT TO TELL HER NO.

BUT YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO LISTEN TO WHAT YOUR MOM SAYS,

AND SHE'S HUNGRY, SO WE'LL BRING WHATEVER SHE ASKS FOR.

**

**

HERE YOU GO, MOM.

OH, GOODNESS, THANK YOU.

PUT IT ON YOUR TABLE?

YES, PLEASE.

OH, THAT LOOKS GOOD.

YES.

**

FOOD HAS ALWAYS PLAYED AN IMPORTANT PART IN MY LIFE,

BECAUSE IN THE SOUTH, FOOD IS LOVE.

THIS LOOKS SO GOOD.

THANK YOU.

NEED ANYTHING ELSE?

NO, THAT'LL BE ALL FOR NOW, THANK YOU.

ALL RIGHT, YOU'RE WELCOME.

**

Renee: WHEN I'M EATING, THE ONLY THING I'M THINKING ABOUT

IS HOW GOOD EACH BITE TASTES,

AND WHEN CAN I GET ANOTHER ONE?

I THINK MY PORTIONS ARE SMALL, BUT I'M PRETTY SURE

WITH THE SIZE OF MY BODY,

YOU CAN TELL THAT THEY'RE NOT AS SMALL

AS I TRICK MY MIND INTO THINKING.

I EAT WHEN I'M HAPPY.

I EAT WHEN I'M SAD.

AND AFTER BEING WITH FEEDERS FOR SO LONG,

MY BODY'S BECOME USED TO HAVING AN ABUNDANCE OF FOOD.

IT'S LIKE I CAN'T STOP.

I GOT TO HAVE IT, AND I GOT TO EAT IT,

AND I GOT TO EAT IT TILL I CAN'T EAT ANYMORE.

BUT EVEN IF I TRY TO CUT BACK,

IT'S LIKE MY STOMACH IS TELLING ME

THAT I NEED MORE, AND IT'S HARD TO IGNORE IT.

**

BUT WHEN I FINISH A MEAL, I FEEL VERY GUILTY

'CAUSE I KNOW THAT I SHOULDN'T HAVE EATEN THAT MUCH,

BUT IT'S LIKE I CAN'T HELP MYSELF.

**

MY DAYS CONSIST OF WATCHING TV,

WAITING FOR ONE OF MY KIDS TO COME BRING ME FOOD,

OR LOOKING OUT THE WINDOW AT MY GRANDKIDS PLAY.

THAT'S BASICALLY IT.

HEY, BABIES!

[ GRUNTS ]

NIK, CAN YOU COME OPEN MY WINDOW, PLEASE?

Lanika: MA'AM?

CAN YOU OPEN MY WINDOW, PLEASE?

YES, MA'AM.

Lanika: IT HURTS TO SEE MY MOTHER MISSING OUT ON LIFE,

'CAUSE I SEE HER PAIN.

IT'S WRITTEN ALL OVER HER FACE.

SHE DON'T DO NOTHING SHE USED TO DO,

AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT I CAN DO

TO HELP HER TO GAIN HERSELF BACK.

I HOPE IT DON'T RAIN SO THEY CAN PLAY SOME MORE.

I LOOK AT HER EVERY DAY, AND I DON'T KNOW IF IT'S...

-HEY, MAMAW! -HEY, BABY!

-WATCH THIS, MAMAW! -I'M LOOKING, I'M LOOKING.

Renee: IT'S HARD TO SEE MY GRANDKIDS OUTSIDE.

I WISH I COULD JOIN THEM.

I CAN'T DO ANYTHING.

I CAN'T GO NOWHERE.

I'M BASICALLY JUST SHUT IN MY ROOM,

WATCHING THE WORLD THROUGH THE WINDOW.

**

[ SIGHS ]

I GET SO LONELY AND BORED,

THE ONLY THING I HAVE TO LOOK FORWARD TO IS EATING.

IF ONE OF MY DAUGHTERS ISN'T FREE TO COOK FOR ME,

I CAN CALL MY SON, BRENT.

EVEN BEFORE HE BRINGS IT IN,

I CAN SMELL THAT DELICIOUS SCENT OF FRIED FOOD.

THERE YOU GO.

OH, THANK YOU. GOD, THAT SMELLS GOOD.

OH, GOODNESS.

Brent: I WORRY ABOUT MY MOM ALL THE TIME, BUT EVERY DAY,

I JUST DO WHAT SHE NEEDS ME TO DO.

I GO PICK UP FOOD MAYBE SIX, SEVEN TIMES A WEEK.

IT GETS FRUSTRATING 'CAUSE I DONE LOST JOBS

BECAUSE OF HAVING TO BE THERE, GIVING HER SUPPORT.

IT'S KIND OF DISCOURAGING.

**

Renee: I KNOW IT'S KEEPING ME TRAPPED IN THIS BED,

BUT IT'S THE ONLY THING THAT BRINGS ME JOY,

SO I CAN'T STOP EATING.

AT THIS POINT, I'M JUST KILLING MYSELF SLOWLY,

DAY BY DAY AND MINUTE BY MINUTE.

BUT I DON'T WANT TO JUST WAIT ON DEATH.

I WANT TO ENJOY LIFE.

I KNOW MY CHILDREN WORRY ABOUT ME DYING LIKE THIS,

AND I CARRY TREMENDOUS GUILT

KNOWING THAT I DEPEND ON MY KIDS FOR EVERYTHING.

SOMETIMES I THINK I'D RATHER BE DEAD

SO I COULD BE OUT OF THEIR WAY,

AND THEY COULD GO ON AND LIVE THEIR LIFE

AND NOT HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF ME.

THIS IS NOT WHAT I THOUGHT LIFE WOULD END UP BEING.

[ SNIFFLES ] AND THIS IS NOT WHAT I WANT LIFE TO BE.

I FEEL LIKE IF I DON'T CHANGE

[ SNIFFLES ] AND IF I DON'T GET HELP, MY DAYS ARE NUMBERED,

AND I'M GONNA DIE LIKE THIS.

**

**

**

OW!

OW.

Renee: I'M GETTING READY TO TRAVEL TO HOUSTON

TO MEET DR. NOWZARADAN FOR THE FIRST TIME.

IT'S ONLY A 12-HOUR DRIVE,

SO WE'RE GONNA TRY TO DRIVE STRAIGHT THERE WITHOUT STOPPING.

AND I'M A LITTLE BIT NERVOUS

BECAUSE THIS IS A REALLY BIG STEP FOR ME.

I HAVEN'T BEEN ON A ROAD TRIP IN A VERY LONG TIME.

I DON'T KNOW IF HE'LL TAKE ME AS A PATIENT,

BUT I DON'T HAVE A CHOICE.

I NEED DR. NOWZARADAN'S HELP TO CHANGE MY LIFE.

Brent: WE ALL READY TO DO THIS OR WHAT?

BRENT, CAN YOU GET ME MY WALKER?

YOU GONNA HOLD THE FORT DOWN?

OH.

THE FIRST COUPLE STEPS OF MY NEW JOURNEY.

THERE YOU GO.

OH!

I'M JUST READY TO GET TO HOUSTON AND START A NEW LIFE.

MY DAUGHTER MONIQUE IS GONNA DRIVE,

AND SHE'S BRINGING HER DAUGHTER AND HER FIANCé, PAUL.

Renee: WHOO! IT'S HOT OUT HERE.

Renee: I'M REALLY THANKFUL THAT MY DAUGHTER'S DRIVING ME DOWN

TO SEE DR. NOW.

OW.

Renee: BUT I WISH I DIDN'T HAVE TO RELY SO MUCH ON MY KIDS.

Renee: OH. THANK YOU.

Renee: I HAVE NOT BEEN IN A CAR FOR MORE THAN AN HOUR

IN A LONG, LONG TIME.

AND WHAT REALLY WORRIES ME IS THAT MY BODY WILL GIVE UP

BEFORE WE EVEN GET THERE,

BECAUSE I GET SHORTNESS OF BREATH VERY EASILY,

AND I HAVE ANXIETY.

SO THE IDEA OF ME BEING UPRIGHT IN A CAR

FOR TWO DAYS SCARES ME TO DEATH.

-ALL RIGHT. -GIVE ME A HUG.

-I LOVE YOU. -I LOVE YOU.

HOLD THE FORT DOWN.

-I WILL. -I'LL SEE YOU SOON. I WILL.

OKAY.

Y'ALL BE CAREFUL.

ALWAYS.

ALL RIGHT. SHUT ME IN.

HASTA LUEGO.

**

**

IT'S REALLY HARD FOR ME TO BE LEAVING MY FAMILY.

BUT IT WILL ONLY BE FOR A FEW DAYS,

AND I KNOW I'M DOING IT FOR THE GREATER GOOD

BECAUSE IF I DON'T GET HELP

AND GET SOMETHING DONE ABOUT MY WEIGHT,

I KNOW I WON'T BE AROUND MUCH LONGER.

OW, GOD.

I'M NOT DOING GOOD.

I COULDN'T EVEN GO 10 MILES WITHOUT MY BODY SCREAMING.

**

IT'S LIKE I CAN'T BELIEVE I LET MYSELF GET THIS WAY.

I'M JUST SCARED, HOPING I CAN MAKE IT.

**

HOW YOU FEELING? ARE YOU IN PAIN?

YES, I AM.

MY BACK IS KILLING ME. MY LEG IS KILLING ME.

I CANNOT GET COMFORTABLE AT ALL.

**

WE'VE ONLY BEEN ON THE ROAD A COUPLE OF HOURS,

THEN MY BODY'S STARTING TO ACHE.

OW. OH!

AND WHEN I'M IN PAIN, THE ONLY THING

THAT WILL MAKE ME FEEL BETTER IS FOOD.

MY WHOLE LIFE, FOOD HAS ALWAYS BEEN THERE TO COMFORT ME

WHEN I'M NOT FEELING GOOD.

AND RIGHT NOW, I JUST WANT TO FEEL COMFORT.

**

STRETCH IT.

OH, GOSH!

OH, GOSH.

**

I'M HURTING PRETTY BAD,

JUST MY BACK, MY LEGS, MY NECK.

I KNEW THIS TRIP WAS GONNA BE ROUGH ON MY BODY,

BUT I HAD NO IDEA IT WOULD BE THIS BAD.

**

WHOO, THANK GOD.

OH!

JUST SIT MINE RIGHT HERE ON MY LAP.

I CAN'T MOVE RIGHT NOW.

MY BODY HURTS TOO BAD.

THIS HAS BEEN A LONG DRIVE.

[ CAR ENGINE STARTS ]

AND I KNOW I SHOULDN'T BE EATING THIS,

ESPECIALLY SINCE I'M GONNA SEE DR. NOW,

BUT IT'S THE ONLY THING THAT MAKES ME FEEL BETTER...

**

THIS IS, LIKE, ONE OF THE LAST GOOD MEALS

I'LL BE ABLE TO HAVE FOR A WHILE.

...SO I WANT TO ENJOY IT WHILE I CAN.

I GUESS I COULD HAVE GOT THE GRILLED CHICKEN, BUT...

OH.

OOH, I CAN'T EAT NO MORE.

I FEEL SO CRAMPED IN THIS CAR.

AT LEAST WHEN I'M STUCK IN MY BEDROOM,

I'VE GOT SOME ROOM TO MOVE AROUND.

AND I'M STARTING TO GET WORRIED ABOUT THIS PAIN I'M FEELING

BECAUSE IT'S BUILDING MUCH MORE THAN I'M USED TO.

OH!

I JUST HOPE IT'S NOT SERIOUS.

THE ONLY THING THAT I NEED RIGHT NOW IS A BED.

OOH, BOY, I'M SO TIRED.

OW, GOD.

OW, OW.

WE MADE IT INTO TEXAS.

BUT I'VE BEEN FEELING WORSE AND WORSE AS WE GO.

I FEEL LIKE IT'S GETTING HARD TO CATCH MY BREATH,

AND THAT SCARES ME.

I HAVE TO STOP AND REST FOR THE NIGHT.

WE HAVE TO GET UP EARLY AND HIT THE ROAD

BECAUSE MY APPOINTMENT WITH DR. NOW IS TOMORROW,

AND WE STILL HAVE ANOTHER COUPLE HOURS TO GO.

GOT TO HELP MY LEG -- GET THIS LEG OUT.

**

OH, GOD.

OKAY, WAIT.

HERE.

OKAY, OKAY. WAIT, WAIT, WAIT, WAIT.

PHEW!

HERE.

[ BREATHING HEAVILY ] GOD BLESS.

THAT'S WHY I GOT IT.

**

I WAS REALLY HOPING WE WOULD GET ALL THE WAY TO HOUSTON TODAY.

BUT MY BODY JUST CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE.

AND I'M HOPING I'LL FEEL BETTER IN THE MORNING.

**

OH. PHEW.

JESUS, THANK YOU, LORD.

THANK YOU, LORD JESUS.

[ BREATHES HEAVILY ]

**

I WAS REALLY HOPING I'D FEEL BETTER AFTER GETTING SOME SLEEP,

BUT ACTUALLY I FEEL WORSE.

WE'RE SO CLOSE TO GETTING TO HOUSTON AND TO SEE DR. NOW,

BUT I'M STARTING TO FEEL LIKE

I'M NOT GONNA BE ABLE TO MAKE IT.

[ SOBS ]

I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON WITH ME,

BUT I FEEL LIKE I CAN'T BREATHE RIGHT.

I'M FEELING LIGHT-HEADED AND EVERYTHING ELSE.

OH, GOD.

I WANT TO GET TO SEE A DOCTOR

THAT CAN PUT ME SOME OXYGEN IN MY BODY!

[ SNIFFLES ] I DON'T WANT TO DIE IN THIS CAR.

[ CRYING ]

Y'ALL NEED TO CALL DR. NOW.

HELLO?

Dr. Nowzaradan: YES, RENEE. THIS IS DR. NOWZARADAN.

WHAT'S GOING ON WITH YOU?

HI, DR. NOWZARADAN.

I DON'T KNOW, I JUST FEEL LIKE I CAN'T GET ENOUGH AIR,

AND I'M FEELING LIGHT-HEADED.

ARE YOU ON ANY MEDICATION? HAVE YOU TAKEN ANYTHING TODAY?

NO, I'M NOT ON ANY MEDICATION.

I HAVEN'T TAKEN ANYTHING TODAY.

ARE YOU IN YOUR CAR?

YES, I'M IN THE CAR.

I'M TRYING TO GET -- I'M TRYING TO GET TO HOUSTON.

I THINK WE'RE LIKE 30 MILES OUT.

I JUST FEEL LIKE I NEED A BREATHING TREATMENT

OR SOMETHING TO HELP ME GET SOME AIR IN ME, THAT'S WHAT --

I WILL SEND YOU THE ADDRESS, AND YOU NEED TO GO TO THE E.R.

I'LL LET THEM KNOW THAT YOU'RE COMING SO THEY CAN GET YOU IN

AND FIND OUT WHAT'S GOING ON.

AND THEN I'LL BE THERE SHORTLY.

OKAY. THANK YOU SO MUCH, DR. NOW.

ALL RIGHT. GOODBYE.

ALL RIGHT, ALL RIGHT. BYE-BYE.

[ PANTING ]

Renee: HE SAID GO TO ST. JOSEPH EMERGENCY ROOM.

I HOPE WE GET THERE SOON,

BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH LONGER I CAN TAKE IT.

**

THERE IT IS, Y'ALL.

HOUSTON.

OH, MY GOD.

[ PANTS ] THAT'S IT, SAID "EMERGENCY" UP THERE.

RIGHT HERE?

OKAY.

CAN YOU HAVE SOMEBODY BRING ME A WHEELCHAIR HERE, SOME OXYGEN?

**

CAN I GET A WHEELCHAIR OUT HERE?

**

OH!

ALL RIGHT. SIT RIGHT THERE IN THE MIDDLE.

PHEW!

OW.

OH, GOD.

EMT: THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

**

Renee: OH, MY GOD.

[ PANTING ]

YES, I'M HER DAUGHTER.

**

Renee: I CAME TO HOUSTON TO SEE DR. NOW AND TRY TO GET BETTER,

BUT NOW I'M SCARED I WAITED TOO LONG TO GET HELP.

I DON'T WANT TO DIE HERE SO FAR FROM HOME.

WHAT IF ALL OF THIS WAS FOR NOTHING?

**

**

**

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

COME IN!

HELLO.

HI, DR. NOW.

HI, RENEE. GOOD TO MEET YOU.

ARE YOU FEELING OKAY NOW?

YES.

I HEARD YOU WERE NOT FEELING WELL AFTER THAT LONG CAR RIDE.

JUST SITTING IN THE CAR TOO LONG.

MY BODY IS JUST WORE OUT.

ALL RIGHT.

SO, YOU GOT SHORT OF BREATH AND HAD SOME CRISIS, HUH?

YES. SO, IT WAS LIKE SHORT OF BREATH

AND STARTED GETTING LIGHT-HEADED,

SEEING BLACK AND GREEN SPOTS.

FELT LIKE I WAS GONNA PASS OUT.

OKAY, WELL, I HAVE SOME GOOD NEWS AND SOME BAD NEWS.

OKAY.

THE GOOD NEWS, ACCORDING TO ALL YOUR TESTS,

THERE'S CURRENTLY NOTHING IMMEDIATELY LIFE-THREATENING

GOING ON WITH YOU RIGHT NOW.

OKAY.

BUT THE BAD NEWS IS THAT YOUR BODY IS IN EXTREMELY BAD SHAPE.

RIGHT.

SO IT'S A GOOD THING THAT YOU'RE HERE

BECAUSE YOU COULDN'T HAVE SURVIVED MUCH LONGER LIKE THIS.

RIGHT.

AND IF WE DON'T GET YOUR WEIGHT DOWN IMMEDIATELY,

YOU WON'T SURVIVE MUCH LONGER.

EVEN ONE MORE DAY ON THE ROAD

WOULD HAVE LIKELY PUSHED YOUR BODY OVER THE LIMIT,

AND YOU WOULDN'T HAVE SURVIVED.

OKAY.

IT IS WHY WE TRY TO GET SOME MEDICAL TESTING DONE

BEFORE YOU LEAVE.

BUT YOU SKIPPED THAT AND TOOK THIS RISK,

AND IT ALMOST KILLED YOU.

YES.

SO YOU'RE LUCKY TO BE ALIVE RIGHT NOW.

I KNOW. I KNOW THAT.

BUT WE HAVE YOU STABLE NOW,

AND WE HAVE SOME WORK TO DO TO KEEP YOU THAT WAY.

OKAY.

TELL ME A LITTLE BIT ABOUT YOUR CURRENT EATING HABITS.

I EAT MOSTLY DURING THE NIGHT.

I DON'T REALLY EAT, LIKE, DURING THE DAYTIME.

MAYBE I MIGHT SNACK A LITTLE BIT.

BUT MOSTLY MY PROBLEM IS, IS I CAN'T REALLY SLEEP AT NIGHT.

I'M BORED, AND I EAT.

YOU AREN'T VERY MOBILE, SO WHO FEEDS YOU?

I'VE BEEN LIVING WITH MY CHILDREN OFF AND ON,

AND SO THEY'RE THE ONES THAT, YOU KNOW, GET ME FOOD

AND, YOU KNOW, BRING ME FOOD.

SO, YOU'VE CREATED A DYNAMIC AT HOME

WHERE YOU MANIPULATE YOUR FAMILY TO HELP TO KILL YOU.

NO, I THINK, YOU KNOW,

BECAUSE THEY SEE THAT I'M MISERABLE IN MY LIFE,

THE WAY MY LIFE IS.

I USED TO BE A HAPPY-GO-LUCKY PERSON,

BUT FOR THE PAST YEAR OR SO,

IT'S JUST EVERYTHING'S GONE DOWNHILL,

AND THEY KNOW FOOD MAKES ME HAPPY.

AND I THINK THAT'S THEIR WAY OF JUST TRYING TO KEEP ME HAPPY.

SO, JUST LIKE ALCOHOLIC AND ALCOHOL MAKE YOU HAPPY,

GIVE THEM MORE ALCOHOL.

IS THAT WHAT YOU'RE TELLING ME?

YOU HAVE A POINT. YOU HAVE A POINT.

SO, THE FOOD IS A LETHAL SUBSTANCE...

RIGHT.

...AND PEOPLE THAT ARE PROVIDING YOU,

THEY'RE HELPING YOU TO SHORTEN YOUR LIFE, RIGHT?

RIGHT.

BECAUSE YOU'RE IN A VERY BAD STATE,

AND ANY NUMBER OF THINGS CAN KILL YOU RIGHT NOW.

SO NOW WE NEED TO WORK TO TRY TO SAVE YOUR LIFE,

AND THIS ISN'T GOING TO BE EASY.

YOU'RE GOING TO HAVE TO COMPLETELY CHANGE YOUR LIFE

TO DO THIS.

DO YOU THINK YOU CAN DO THAT?

I KNOW I CAN.

I MEAN, YOU KNOW, I KNOW IT'S GONNA BE HARD.

I KNOW IT'S GONNA BE DIFFICULT,

BUT I KNOW THAT I HAVE TO, LIKE, CHANGE MY WHOLE LIFESTYLE.

OKAY, SO YOU WANT TO MAKE THE CHANGES?

I WANT TO MAKE THE CHANGES.

I'M GONNA MAKE THE CHANGES.

OKAY, YEAH, I HOPE SO.

BUT WE WILL GIVE YOU A FIGHTING CHANCE.

RIGHT.

SO, I'VE ADMITTED YOU TO THE HOSPITAL AND STARTING YOU

ON A 1,200-CALORIE-A-DAY, HIGH-PROTEIN,

LOW-CARB DIET.

OKAY.

AND SO THAT WE CAN GET YOUR WEIGHT DOWN IMMEDIATELY.

RIGHT.

AND WE ALSO ARE GOING TO GET PHYSICAL THERAPY

TO WORK WITH YOU DAILY

SO THAT WE CAN GET YOU WALKING MORE,

BECAUSE YOU ARE VERY CLOSE TO BEING IMMOBILE,

AND THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO REASON FOR THAT.

RIGHT.

AND IF WE LET THAT HAPPEN, THAT MAY BE IT FOR YOU.

RIGHT.

IN FACT, LET'S GET A LITTLE EXERCISING RIGHT NOW

AND GET YOU UP TO CHECK YOUR WEIGHT.

OKAY.

OW.

I SURE DO, 'CAUSE YOU KNOW MY LEGS

AIN'T GONNA MAKE IT ON ITS OWN RIGHT NOW.

OH. PHEW.

OH, MY GOD. MY LEGS HURT SO BAD.

-PHEW. -YOU GOT IT?

OH, GOD.

OKAY, LET ME GO.

OKAY, YOU ARE 631 POUNDS.

OH, MY GOD.

OKAY?

PHEW.

OH, THAT'S GOT TO CHANGE.

OH, MY GOD. GET ME.

NO, NO, NO. MY LEGS IS GONNA HANG ME UP.

YOU ALL RIGHT?

OH!

OH, GOD.

PHEW.

ALL RIGHT, RENEE. EVERYTHING CHANGES NOW.

YOU UNDERSTAND ME? -OKEYDOKE.

THANK YOU, DR. NOW.

OKAY.

WE'LL RUN SOME MORE TESTS, AND I'LL CHECK ON YOU SOON.

OKAY.

AND YOUR EXERCISE STARTS TOMORROW MORNING.

SOUNDS LIKE A PLAN. THANK YOU.

ALL RIGHT. SEE YOU ALL LATER.

ALL RIGHT.

Dr. Nowzaradan: RENEE IS LUCKY TO BE ALIVE RIGHT NOW.

HER BODY SUFFERED A SEVERE AMOUNT

OF DETERIORATION OVER THE YEARS,

AND IT IS CLOSE TO ITS LIMIT,

SO IT'S FAR TOO RISKY TO SEND HER HOME RIGHT NOW.

BUT WE HAVE A LONG ROAD AHEAD WITH RENEE,

NOT JUST BECAUSE OF HER POOR PHYSICAL CONDITION,

BUT HER FAMILY SEEMS TO BE A BIT DISCONNECTED,

AND THEY DON'T SEEM TO BE TOO CONCERNED

ABOUT THE FACT THAT SHE'S CLOSE TO DEATH.

SO AS MUCH AS THEY LOVE HER, SHE'S MORE OF A BURDEN TO THEM.

SO WE WILL HAVE TO ADDRESS THAT.

BUT OUR PRIORITY NEEDS TO BE TO GET HER WEIGHT DOWN

IMMEDIATELY TO REDUCE THE STRAIN ON HER BODY

AND GIVE HER A FIGHTING CHANCE TO SURVIVE AND DO THIS.

**

WE HAVE HAD RENEE IN THE HOSPITAL FOR ABOUT A MONTH,

AND OVERALL, SHE HAS DONE WELL.

HER FAMILY ALMOST IMMEDIATELY WENT BACK HOME,

AND SO SHE HAS BEEN THERE ALONE,

AND THERE IS NO WAY SHE COULD CHEAT ON HER DIET.

WE HAVE TREATED HER FOR A NUMBER OF ISSUES THAT WE DISCOVERED

WHILE SHE WAS IN HERE,

SUCH AS HIGH-BLOOD PRESSURE,

KIDNEY DYSFUNCTION, AND ENLARGED HEART,

AND THAT IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING.

BUT THE BIGGEST ISSUE OVER THE LAST MONTH

WAS HER RESISTANCE TO EXERCISING.

SHE DOESN'T LIKE TO GET UP MUCH, SO SHE STILL NEEDS

TO MAKE A LOT MORE PROGRESS WITH THAT.

BUT WE HAVE HER TO A PLACE THAT IS SAFE FOR HER TO GO HOME.

SO NOW IT'S TIME FOR HER TO SHOW ME

THAT SHE CAN DO THIS ON HER OWN.

**

Renee: I'M EXCITED BECAUSE DR. NOW SAID I COULD GO HOME TODAY.

I'VE MISSED MY WHOLE FAMILY SO MUCH.

AND TODAY MY SON IS COMING TO HELP ME

GET SITUATED IN MY NEW PLACE,

AND I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE HIM.

-HEY! -HEY, WHAT'S GOING ON?

I'M SITTING HERE, WONDERING WHERE YOU WAS AT.

YOU DOING ALL RIGHT?

YEAH, I'M DOING PRETTY GOOD.

DOING DEFINITELY GOOD NOW THAT I SEE YOU.

OH, GOD. I MISSED YOU.

YEAH, ME TOO.

I KNEW I COULD COUNT ON YOU.

I'M READY TO GO.

I'M JUST WAITING FOR THE DOCTOR

TO COME GIVE ME MY WALKING PAPERS

SO WE CAN GET OVER THERE AND SEE WHAT IT'S ABOUT.

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

HI, RENEE.

HI, DR. NOW.

HOW YOU DOING?

I'M DOING GOOD.

OKAY.

AND SO, TODAY, WE'RE GONNA GET YOU OUT OF THE HOSPITAL.

YOU GOT A PLACE IN HOUSTON TO STAY, SO IT IS TIME FOR YOU

TO GO HOME AND SHOW ME WHAT YOU CAN DO ON YOUR OWN.

HOW DOES THAT SOUND?

THAT SOUNDS MARVELOUS.

-OKAY. -YES.

ALL RIGHT.

SO, I WANT YOU TO LEAVE 60 POUNDS OVER NEXT 2 MONTHS

TO SHOW ME YOU'RE READY AND WILLING TO WORK HARD TO DO THIS.

WE HAVE SHOWN YOU THE DIET THAT YOU NEED TO BE ON,

AND YOU HAVE THAT INFORMATION,

SO YOU SHOULD HAVE NO PROBLEM STICKING WITH IT.

OKAY.

AND, ALSO, I WANT YOU TO KEEP ACTIVE AND CONTINUE TO WORK

TO GET YOUR STAMINA UP, OKAY?

OKAY. SOUNDS LIKE A PLAN.

BECAUSE EVEN IF YOU HIT YOUR WEIGHT-LOSS GOAL,

YOU MAY NOT PASS THE MEDICAL TESTING

BECAUSE YOUR BODY STILL WON'T BE ABLE TO HANDLE SURGERY.

SO, KEEP UP THE HARD WORK AND SHOW ME WHAT YOU CAN DO, OKAY?

OKAY.

ALL RIGHT, LET'S CHECK YOUR WEIGHT AND SEE HOW YOU'RE DOING

BEFORE YOU GO HOME, OKAY?

**

**

ALL RIGHT. LET'S SEE WHAT THAT NUMBER SAYS.

**

583.

YOU LOST 48 POUNDS.

SO THAT'S GREAT.

I'M GETTING DIZZY.

I THINK YOU CAN SEE, YOU STILL NEED TO GET UP

AND DO YOUR EXERCISES.

YES, SIR.

OH!

YOU SHOULDN'T BE BREATHING SO HEAVY

FOR JUST THAT LITTLE WALK STILL.

AND THIS IS NOT VERY GOOD, OKAY?

SO YOU NEED TO WORK ON THAT,

BECAUSE THAT'S GONNA BE VERY DIFFICULT

FOR YOU TO GET IN SHAPE,

THAT YOU CAN BE ABLE TO WALK AT LEAST A BLOCK OR TWO

BEFORE WE CONSIDER DOING ANYTHING.

RIGHT. OKAY.

SO, WE'RE GONNA SEND PHYSICAL THERAPY TO YOUR HOUSE

SO YOU CAN DO YOUR EXERCISES.

IT IS CRITICALLY IMPORTANT YOU COOPERATE BETTER

THAN YOU HAVE HERE WITH YOUR EXERCISE, OKAY?

-OKAY. -ALL RIGHT.

WE'LL GET TRANSPORT IN HERE, AND NEXT TIME,

I WILL SEE YOU IN THE CLINIC.

-OKAY. -OKAY.

WE'LL SEE YOU THEN.

-THANK YOU. -OKAY. I'LL SEE YOU.

Dr. Nowzaradan: RIGHT NOW MY BIGGEST CONCERN FOR RENEE

IS HER LACK OF SUPPORT FROM HER FAMILY.

EVEN THOUGH THEY HAVE SET UP

AN APARTMENT HERE FOR HER IN HOUSTON,

NONE OF THEM ARE WILLING TO STAY DOWN HERE

TO HELP HER AND SUPPORT HER.

SO THAT'S GOING TO MAKE THIS A LOT HARDER FOR HER.

AND IF SHE GOES OFF THE RAILS AND STARTS MAKING COMPROMISES,

SHE CAN EASILY UNDO ALL THE WORK AND PROGRESS WE MADE WITH HER,

AND WE MAY NOT BE ABLE TO PULL HER THROUGH

AND SAVE HER A SECOND TIME.

**

Renee: I'M EXCITED ABOUT GETTING OUT OF THE HOSPITAL,

AND I'M HAPPY THAT I LOST WEIGHT.

BUT I'M SCARED ABOUT THE FACT THAT I'M GONNA BE ALONE

FOR THE NEXT COUPLE OF MONTHS.

I KNOW THIS IS GONNA BE HARD.

BUT MY LIFE DEPENDS ON THIS, SO I CAN'T GO BACK TO GEORGIA.

I NEED TO STAY HERE AND DO WHAT I HAVE TO DO TO GET SURGERY.

YOU TAKE CARE NOW.

BECAUSE IT'S MY ONLY HOPE.

WHOO.

I JUST WISH I DIDN'T HAVE TO DO THIS ON MY OWN.

**

[ BIRDS CHIRPING ]

[ DOG BARKS ]

**

**

**

Renee: IT'S BEEN ABOUT A MONTH SINCE I'VE BEEN OUT OF THE HOSPITAL.

MY SON BROUGHT ME HERE AND HELPED ME GET SETTLED,

BUT THEN HE HAD TO GO BACK TO GEORGIA LIKE MONIQUE DID.

NOW I'M ALL ALONE.

AND THAT'S BEEN EXTREMELY HARD.

I STARTED THIS JOURNEY, AND I KNEW THAT FOR THE MOST PART

THAT I WAS GONNA HAVE TO DO IT FOR MYSELF, BY MYSELF.

I DON'T THINK ANYBODY BELIEVED ME WHEN I TOLD MY FAMILY

THAT I WAS GONNA DO THIS.

I THINK THEY THOUGHT THAT I WAS JUST BLOWING SMOKE.

SO I'M FINDING WAYS TO MOTIVATE MYSELF

AND STICK TO THE DIET AND EXERCISES I'M SUPPOSED TO DO.

DR. NOW WANTED ME TO DO PHYSICAL THERAPY,

BUT I FEEL LIKE I'M DOING ENOUGH OF MY OWN EXERCISES THAT I DO,

AND I'M DOING THEM EVERY MORNING.

I'M JUST FRUSTRATED BECAUSE I'M SO WEAK,

AND I GET TIRED AT THE LEAST LITTLE THING.

BUT, I MEAN, I'M NOT GIVING UP.

BY NO MEANS, I'M NOT GONNA GIVE UP.

THE ONLY VISITORS I GET IS A PERSONAL-CARE ASSISTANT

THAT CHECKS ON ME AND BRINGS ME WHAT I NEED.

AND BOREDOM MAKES IT EVEN HARDER NOT TO STRUGGLE

WITH EATING ALL THE TIME.

BUT I'M WORKING ON IT.

SO I'M WORKING HARD TO HELP MY GOAL

AND GET WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY,

BECAUSE THE SOONER I HIT MY GOALS,

THE SOONER I CAN GO HOME.

**

[ GRUNTS ]

TODAY, I'M GOING TO SEE DR. NOW FOR MY FOLLOW-UP APPOINTMENT.

MY SON, BRENT, CAME DOWN TO HELP ME GET THERE.

AND I'M EXCITED TO HAVE SOMEONE HERE WITH ME FOR A LITTLE BIT.

Brent: OH, LORD.

Renee: OH, LORD JESUS.

[ PANTING ]

I THINK TODAY'S GONNA BE A GOOD DAY,

BECAUSE I WORKED HARD NOT ONLY TO LOSE WEIGHT,

BUT TO GET MY STAMINA UP LIKE THE DOCTOR SAID.

SO I FEEL LIKE TODAY IS GONNA GO WELL

AND I'M GONNA GET APPROVED FOR WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY.

SON...

I KNOW.

OH, MY GOODNESS.

WAIT. I'M LOSING MY SHOE.

I KNOW IT IS, SON. I'M SORRY.

-ALL RIGHT. -CAN SHE GO IN?

MM-HMM.

GET IN THE CAR.

OKAY.

[ SNIFFLES, GRUNTS ]

[ PANTING ]

BACK IN.

[ PANTING ]

OH, LORD JESUS.

OH!

SON, I'M GONNA FALL.

NO, YOU WON'T.

I'M GONNA [BLEEP] FALL!

MAMA, QUIT TRIPPING 'CAUSE I'M NOT GONNA SIT OUT HERE.

MY LEG IS BENT AND STUCK.

I CAN'T GET MY LEG OUT. THIS LEG --

MAMA, QUIT PANICKING AND JUST TELL ME WHAT YOU NEED ME TO DO.

I DON'T KNOW, BUT WAIT.

JUST LET ME GO FOR A MINUTE.

I'M TRYING TO KEEP YOU FROM FALLING ON THE [BLEEP] FLOOR.

OW! OW, MY LEG!

GET UP, GET UP, GET UP.

[BLEEP] OH, I DON'T KNOW.

MY LEG IS HURTING, SON.

WHAT DO YOU WANT ME -- HUH?

GO AHEAD, COME ON. WE...UP OUTTA THERE.

[BLEEP]

-YOU READY? COME ON. -OW.

CAN YOU PULL THE LEG OUT FROM UNDER ME?

THE BENT LEG. -THIS ONE?

OW! NO, IT'S NOT.

DAMN, MAMA, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO.

I'M ABOUT TO COME BEHIND YOU.

OW. OW, OW.

MOM, I'LL TRY TO SIT YOU STRAIGHT UP.

OKAY, WAIT A MINUTE.

LET'S GO.

-OW. -PULL THE LEFT ARM.

OW, MY ARM. OW, MY LEG.

GRAB THIS. THAT BAR, MAMA.

YOU'RE OKAY.

JUST DON'T -- LET IT GO. COME ON.

-LET HER GO, LET HER GO. -YES.

**

OKAY.

**

[ GROANS ]

-I'M SORRY, SON. -YOU AIN'T NO PROBLEM.

I KNEW IT WAS GONNA BE LIKE THIS.

THAT'S WHY I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY THEY DON'T HAVE

BETTER VEHICLES FOR PEOPLE IN THIS SITUATION.

[ PANTING ]

OW.

Renee: I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS HAPPENED.

MY LEG IS IN SO MUCH PAIN RIGHT NOW.

I THINK I TWISTED IT.

I'M SO SCARED RIGHT NOW.

IF I MISS MY APPOINTMENT,

I'M GONNA LOSE MY CHANCE TO GET SURGERY.

BUT THERE'S NO WAY I CAN MAKE IT.

[ GROANS ]

I'M IN TOO MUCH PAIN,

AND I'M SCARED OF HURTING MYSELF REALLY BAD.

I DON'T WANT TO LOSE MY CHANCE.

SO I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO RIGHT NOW.

**

**

**

RENEE CALLED ME EARLIER, AND SHE TOLD ME THAT SHE HURT HER LEG,

AND SHE COULDN'T MAKE IT TO HER APPOINTMENT.

SO I SENT AN AMBULANCE TO PICK HER UP

AND BRING HER TO THE HOSPITAL.

BUT I SUSPECT HER LEG ISN'T THE REAL ISSUE HERE.

SHE HAS REFUSED PHYSICAL THERAPY,

AND THEY DID A WEIGH-IN WHEN SHE ARRIVED,

AND SHE ONLY LOST EIGHT POUNDS IN PAST TWO MONTHS.

**

HI, RENEE.

HI, DR. NOW.

HOW YOU FEEL?

LIKE I GOT RUN OVER BY A TAXI.

SO, WHAT HAPPENED?

I GOT INTO A FIGHT WITH THE TAXI, AND THE TAXI WON.

I WAS TRYING TO GET IN THE TAXI,

AND I SLID BETWEEN THE TWO SEATS AND GOT STUCK.

AND YOU SAY YOUR LEG IS HURT NOW?

YEAH.

LET ME TAKE A LOOK AND SEE WHAT'S GOING ON.

OOH, PLEASE BE CAREFUL. THEY HURT SO BAD.

AND CAN YOU STRAIGHTEN OUT YOUR LEG?

OHH.

OHH.

WHERE ARE YOU HURTING? YOUR KNEE?

THE KNEE AND LOWER PART ON THE SIDE.

IT IS POSSIBLE THAT YOU HAVE MINOR STRAIN,

BUT THERE'S NOTHING SERIOUSLY WRONG.

SO YOU'RE OKAY, AND YOU CAN KEEP WALKING.

I'M NOT SURE ABOUT THAT.

RIGHT NOW I'M JUST IN A LOT OF PAIN AND JUST TIRED,

AND I'M FRUSTRATED WITH MYSELF

'CAUSE I THOUGHT I WAS DOING GOOD

AS FAR AS, YOU KNOW, WALKING AROUND, WALKING BETTER.

COME ON, RENEE. YOU KNOW THAT'S NOT TRUE.

OVER THE PAST TWO MONTHS, THE PHYSICAL THERAPY WE SEND TO YOU,

YOU TURN THEM AWAY.

AND YOU'RE ONLY DOWN TO 575.

4 POUNDS A MONTH IS FAR FROM THE PROGRESS YOU SHOULD HAVE MADE.

SO YOU'RE NOT WALKING, AND YOU'RE NOT LOSING WEIGHT.

I'M LOSING WEIGHT.

I'M TRYING -- I KNOW I'M LOSING WEIGHT.

AND, I MEAN, I'M DOING EXERCISE AS BEST I CAN.

YOU CAN'T AFFORD TO PLAY GAMES LIKE THIS, RENEE.

AND YOU'RE NOT GOING TO SURVIVE MUCH LONGER LIKE THIS.

WHEN YOU ARRIVE,

YOU WERE IN KIDNEY FAILURE AND HEART FAILURE.

WE TURNED THAT AROUND.

IF YOU START TO GAIN AGAIN,

THOSE ISSUES WILL COME RIGHT BACK.

SO, HERE IS WHAT WE'RE GOING TO DO.

I'M GOING TO START SENDING YOU TO WATER AEROBICS,

AND YOU'RE GOING TO GO THREE TIMES A WEEK.

AND IF YOU SKIP EVEN ONCE, WE'RE DONE HERE.

I'M NOT GOING TO PLAY ANY GAMES WITH YOU, OKAY?

I UNDERSTAND.

GOOD. AND YOUR GOAL IS STILL THE SAME.

60 POUNDS IN 2 MONTHS.

OKAY.

ALL RIGHT. I'LL SEE YOU LATER.

ALL RIGHT.

**

RENEE CANNOT AFFORD TO CONTINUE TO ROLL THE DICE

WITH HER HEALTH ANYMORE.

BUT IF SHE DOESN'T START TO DO WHAT SHE NEEDS,

THEN HER BODY WILL START TO DETERIORATE AGAIN.

AND IF IT DOES, THAT WILL EITHER END HER LIFE,

OR IT WILL TAKE MONTHS AGAIN IN THE HOSPITAL

TO HELP HER RECOVER IF WE ARE EVEN ABLE TO DO THAT.

SO, IF SHE DOESN'T GET REALLY SERIOUS THIS TIME,

THEN THINGS ARE ABOUT TO GET MUCH WORSE FOR HER.

**

Renee: I'M GOING TO DO WATER AEROBICS TODAY.

AND I'M NOT THAT EXCITED ABOUT IT

BECAUSE MY LEG STILL REALLY HURTS.

BUT DR. NOW IS TELLING ME NO EXCUSES, SO I'M GOING.

MY SON, BRENT, HAS AGREED TO STAY LONGER WITH ME TO HELP ME.

AND HIS FIANCéE, HANNAH, IS STAYING WITH US, TOO,

TO HELP US OUT.

SO IT'S REALLY NICE TO HAVE FAMILY WITH ME,

BUT I'M STILL NERVOUS ABOUT DOING THESE EXERCISES TODAY.

**

I CAN'T EVEN REMEMBER THE LAST TIME I WAS IN A SWIMMING POOL.

SO I'M JUST HOPING ALL GOES WELL TODAY

AND THAT I DON'T HURT MY LEG EVEN MORE.

**

-HELLO! -HI.

-HOW ARE YOU? -OKAY.

-MY NAME IS HANNAH. -I'M RENEE.

-NICE TO MEET YOU. -MM-HMM.

ALL RIGHT, WELL, WE'RE PROBABLY GONNA ROLL AROUND THIS WAY,

AND THEN WE'RE GONNA HAVE YOU WALK DOWN THE RAMP

IF YOU'RE COMFORTABLE WITH THAT.

I'M NOT SURE ABOUT THIS.

I DON'T KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD IDEA.

**

GRAB HERE.

OKAY. OH, YEAH.

YOU WANT TO CATCH YOUR BREATH?

**

SEE IF WE CAN MAKE IT ALL THE WAY TO THE CORNER THERE,

AND THEN WE'LL TAKE A BREATHER.

I DON'T LIKE THIS.

THERE YOU GO.

NOW YOU CAN REST A MINUTE.

HOW ARE YOU FEELING NOW?

-TIRED. -TIRED?

I WAS TOLD IT WOULD BE EASIER TO MOVE AROUND IN THE WATER,

BUT IT'S NOT FEELING ANY EASIER RIGHT NOW.

ALL RIGHT. LET'S WALK FORWARD A COUPLE STEPS.

TRY TO LOOSEN UP THE DEATH GRIP A LITTLE.

HERE WE GO.

LET'S TRY TO WALK THIS WAY SOME MORE.

**

I FEEL LIKE I'M STARTING TO GET THE HANG OF THIS.

**

ALL RIGHT. LET'S DO SOME LEG THINGS.

THEN YOU'RE GONNA BEND YOUR KNEE

AND KICK STRAIGHT AT ME LIKE THIS.

OKAY. SO BEND, EXTEND.

I FEEL LIKE A ROCKETTE. [ LAUGHS ]

SEE? YOU'RE ON YOUR WAY THERE ALREADY.

[ BOTH LAUGH ]

PERFECT.

IT FEELS GOOD TO BE EXERCISING,

AND I CAN MOVE AROUND WITHOUT BEING AFRAID OF FALLING.

[ LAUGHS ] GOOD. THAT WAS GOOD.

THAT WAS GOOD.

HOW ARE YOU FEELING? -I'M OKAY.

I THINK HALFWAY IN, I GOT THE HANG OF IT.

SO I'M GONNA KEEP UP WITH THIS AND KEEP WORKING TO HELP MY GOAL

SO I CAN GET MY WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY SOON.

AND THAT'S NOT GONNA BE EASY.

BUT IF MY SON CONTINUES TO STAY WITH ME TO DO THIS...

I THINK I CAN MAKE IT.

**

I'M GETTING A LITTLE HUNGRY.

WHAT YOU GONNA EAT?

MAYBE JUST A LITTLE SCRAMBLED EGG.

ALL RIGHT.

THANKFULLY, MY SON IS STILL HERE WITH ME.

HE AGREED TO STAY WITH ME FOR A FULL TWO MONTHS,

AND HE'S BEEN A GODSEND.

HE'S ALSO HELPING ME MAKE HEALTHY MEALS

SO I DON'T OVEREAT.

OH, THESE LOOK DELICIOUS.

SO I'M SO THANKFUL FOR ALL HIS HELP,

AND I KNOW I CAN'T DO THIS WITHOUT HIM.

ALL MY OTHER KIDS ARE TOO BUSY FOR ME,

SO HE'S THE ONLY ONE I HAVE RIGHT NOW.

AND IT'S MAKING A DIFFERENCE FOR ME.

THAT'S ABOUT ALL I CAN HANDLE, SON.

**

MM.

**

Brent: I'M GLAD I'M HERE WITH MY MOM.

IT DON'T REALLY MATTER WHERE SHE'D GO.

IF SHE NEEDS ME, I'LL BE THERE.

WE'RE JUST FAMILY. YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN?

THAT'S WHAT YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO DO.

**

I DON'T KNOW WHAT I'M GONNA DO WITHOUT YOU WHEN YOU GO.

WHAT YOU MEAN, YOU CAN'T DO IT?

IF I NEED YOU, I KNOW I CAN COUNT ON YOU.

AND I GUESS THAT'S WHY I DEPEND ON YOU.

JUST KNOW THAT I LOVE YOU, SON, OKAY?

I LOVE YOU, TOO.

Renee: I HAVE MY NEXT APPOINTMENT WITH THE DOCTOR IN A FEW WEEKS,

AND I'M JUST HOPING I HIT THE GOAL I NEED.

I HAVE TO DO THIS NOW BECAUSE I KNOW IT MAY BE MY LAST CHANCE.

**

**

[ BIRDS CHIRPING ]

**

Renee: I'M A LITTLE NERVOUS ABOUT TODAY.

OOH.

I KNOW I'M WORKING REALLY HARD, AND THIS TIME,

I'VE DONE ALL MY EXERCISES.

THANK YOU.

I'LL SEE YOU ON MY RETURN TRIP HOME.

BUT IT HAS BEEN A LITTLE HARDER

BECAUSE I HAVEN'T BEEN FEELING WELL THE PAST FEW DAYS.

**

RENEE BIRAN?

I JUST HOPE THE DOCTOR CAN GIVE ME SOMETHING

TO HELP ME GET PAST THIS AND FEEL BETTER.

BUT I'M HOPING I HIT MY WEIGHT-LOSS GOAL TODAY.

DR. NOW GAVE ME A WEIGHT-LOSS GOAL OF 60 POUNDS.

SO I NEED TO BE DOWN TO 515 TODAY.

I JUST HOPE I HIT THAT.

**

I THOUGHT I'D DONE BETTER THAN THAT.

[ SNIFFLES ] OH, LORDY.

I'M STILL MAKING PROGRESS.

BUT IT'S JUST NOT AS MUCH PROGRESS AS HE WANTED.

SO NOW I DON'T KNOW WHAT DR. NOW IS GONNA SAY.

THANK YOU SO MUCH.

**

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

COME IN.

-HELLO, RENEE. -HI, DR. NOW.

HOW ARE YOU?

OOH, I'M HALF-GOOD AND HALF-BAD.

WHAT IS THE GOOD PART, AND WHAT IS THE BAD PART?

THE GOOD PART IS I'M STILL LOSING WEIGHT.

NO, THAT'S THE BAD PART,

BECAUSE YOU ONLY LOST EIGHT POUNDS AGAIN.

THAT SEEMS TO BE YOUR TWO-MONTH LIMIT ON YOUR OWN.

SO, WHAT'S THE OTHER BAD PART, THEN?

I'M STILL TIRED AND DON'T HAVE ANY ENERGY.

SO, WHEN DID THAT START?

IT'S BEEN LIKE THAT A FEW DAYS NOW.

I MEAN, I JUST, LIKE, HAVE ZERO ENERGY.

OKAY.

SO, LET ME JUST CHECK YOUR PULSE AND YOUR BREATHING.

I DO GET SHORT OF BREATH,

BUT IT'S AFTER I'VE BEEN SITTING FOR A WHILE.

WHY DIDN'T YOU CALL ME WHEN YOU START FEELING THIS WAY?

I DON'T KNOW.

I JUST FEEL THAT I WAS MALNOURISHED FROM MY DIETING.

NO. YOU KNOW YOU ARE NOT STICKING TO YOUR DIET.

IF YOU WERE MALNOURISHED, YOU WOULD HAVE LOST MORE WEIGHT

THAN EIGHT POUNDS IN TWO MONTHS.

UMM, I -- YEAH.

I EXPLAINED TO YOU HOW BAD YOUR BODY IS

AND HOW YOU CAN'T TAKE ANY RISKS RIGHT NOW.

ONE OF THE THINGS THAT WE HAVE TO ADDRESS

WAS THAT YOU WERE IN KIDNEY FAILURE

PARTLY FROM ALL THE ABUSE

THAT YOU HAVE PUT YOUR BODY THROUGH ALL THESE YEARS.

OKAY.

WITH YOUR LACK OF PROGRESS IN THE PAST TWO MONTHS,

I'M CONCERNED YOUR CONDITION HAS STARTED TO DETERIORATE AGAIN

AND THAT YOUR KIDNEYS ARE HAVING ISSUES.

AND IF THAT'S THE CASE, YOU COULD BE CLOSE

TO KIDNEY FAILURE AND HEART FAILURE.

OKAY.

SO YOUR CONDITION IS VERY FRAGILE,

AND YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND THAT.

I'M CALLING MEDICAL TRANSPORT TO TAKE YOU TO THE HOSPITAL

TO FIND OUT WHAT'S GOING ON

AND IF YOU HAVE ANY LIFE- THREATENING ISSUE RIGHT NOW.

-OKAY. -OKAY?

I'LL SEE YOU OVER THERE.

ALL RIGHT.

[ SIGHS ]

THERE COULD BE ANY NUMBER OF ISSUES WITH RENEE RIGHT NOW

THAT COULD LEAD TO HER DEATH VERY SOON

IF WE DON'T ADDRESS IT IMMEDIATELY.

BUT RIGHT NOW WITH HER SYMPTOMS, MY CONCERN IS HER KIDNEYS.

WHEN SHE FIRST ARRIVED,

MANY OF HER ORGANS WERE CLOSE TO FAILURE,

ESPECIALLY HER KIDNEYS AND HER HEART.

AND WE WANT TO GET THEM HEALTHY AGAIN,

BUT SHE HAS SPENT FOUR MONTHS NOT COMPLYING WITH HER DIET,

AND SHE HAS CONTINUED TO EAT UNHEALTHY FOOD,

COMBINED WITH ALL THE STRAIN THAT HER WEIGHT

IS PUTTING ON HER BODY

TO WHERE NOW SHE MAY BE IN A PLACE

THAT IS ABOUT TO BE CRITICAL.

AND ON TOP OF THAT, SHE HAS LET IT GO UNCHECKED

AND UNTREATED FOR DAYS NOW,

SO HER BODY MAY BE READY TO GIVE OUT AT ANY MOMENT.

SO WE HAVE TO FIND OUT WHAT'S GOING ON WITH HER,

AND WE NEED TO DO THAT NOW.

**

WE HAVE HAD RENEE HERE FOR A COUPLE MONTHS,

AND AT HER LAST APPOINTMENT,

SHE WAS COMPLAINING THAT SHE WAS NOT FEELING WELL,

SO I BROUGHT HER HERE.

AND WE DISCOVERED SHE WAS CLOSE TO HEART FAILURE

AND KIDNEY FAILURE.

AND HER POOR DIET COMBINED WITH ALL THE WEIGHT

SHE HAS ON HER BODY IS JUST PUSHING IT TO THE LIMIT.

SO I HAVE HAD TO KEEP HER ON A CONTROLLED DIET

AND TREATED HER TO GET TO A HEALTHY ENOUGH PLACE

THAT SHE CAN SURVIVE.

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

HI, RENEE.

HI, DR. NOW.

HOW ARE YOU FEELING?

I'M FEELING PRETTY GOOD.

OKAY.

WE HAVE NURSED YOU BACK TO HEALTH,

AND YOU'RE DOING WELL NOW.

AND ON TOP OF THAT, WE HAVE HAD YOU ON A CONTROLLED DIET,

AND WE HAVE GOTTEN YOU DOWN ALMOST 100 POUNDS TO 471.

SO YOU'RE DOING MUCH BETTER, AND WE CAN SEND YOU HOME AGAIN.

OKAY.

BUT YOU STILL HAVE TO SHOW ME

THAT YOU CAN DO THIS ON YOUR OWN,

AND I'M GIVING YOU 1 MONTH TO LOSE 30 POUNDS.

OKAY.

BUT I'M VERY CONCERNED BECAUSE WE HAVE DONE THIS BEFORE,

SO THIS IS YOUR LAST CHANCE.

YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND THAT.

I WON'T LET THAT HAPPEN AGAIN. I LEARNED MY LESSON.

YOU WON'T SURVIVE ANOTHER MEDICAL EMERGENCY,

AND WE'RE NOT GOING TO WASTE ANY MORE TIME PLAYING GAMES

IF YOU'RE NOT EVEN WILLING TO TRY.

OKAY.

ASIDE FROM 16 POUNDS THAT YOU LOST OVER 4 MONTHS,

THE ONLY REAL WEIGHT LOSS YOU HAD

HAS BEEN HERE IN THE HOSPITAL.

YES.

SO, WE'RE GOING TO KEEP SENDING YOU TO WATER AEROBICS

AND DOING EXERCISES WITH YOU.

AND I'M GOING TO START YOU ON PSYCHOTHERAPY NOW.

OKAY.

I'M GOING TO SET THAT UP TO START NEXT WEEK.

AND HOPEFULLY THAT WILL HELP YOU

TO MAKE THE DIFFERENCE THIS TIME.

OKAY.

BECAUSE I'M SERIOUS WHEN I SAY THIS IS YOUR LAST CHANCE.

I'M NOT HERE TO WATCH YOU DIE.

I'M HERE TO GIVE YOU A QUALITY OF LIFE...

OKAY.

...AND HELP YOU LIVE LONGER.

ALL I NEED FROM YOU IS A LITTLE EFFORT.

-OKAY. -OKAY.

SEE YOU SOON AND HOPEFULLY 30 POUNDS LIGHTER.

OKAY. SOUNDS GOOD.

RENEE IS JUST ABOUT OUT OF CHANCES.

AND IN AN EFFORT TO CONTINUE

TO TRY TO FIND WAYS TO MOTIVATE HER,

I'M GOING TO START TO SEND HER TO PSYCHOTHERAPY.

WE DO PSYCHOTHERAPY WITH PATIENTS TO HELP THEM

WITH THE TRANSITION TO LIFE AFTER WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY.

THEN ONCE WE REMOVE THE PHYSICAL COMPULSION AND DRIVE TO EAT,

WE CAN START TO ADDRESS THE EMOTIONAL COMPONENT.

SO, STARTING THIS PROCESS BEFORE WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY

CAN AFFECT LONG-TERM RESULTS.

BUT IN THIS CASE, WE'RE RUNNING OUT OF OPTIONS WITH RENEE.

SO HOPEFULLY THIS WILL BE WHAT SHE NEEDS TO TURN THINGS AROUND.

BUT AFTER THIS, WE ARE OUT OF OPTIONS.

AND AT THAT POINT, HER ODDS OF SURVIVAL

IS GOING TO BE VERY LOW.

**

Renee: TODAY, THE THERAPIST DR. NOW WANTS ME TO SEE IS COMING OVER.

[ GRUNTS ]

AND I'M LOOKING FORWARD TO IT.

SO I'M HOPING THIS WILL GO WELL

AND I WILL COME OUT WITH A LOT OF INSIGHT

ON HOW TO BE DETERMINED WITH MY WEIGHT LOSS.

BECAUSE I'M DESPERATE FOR ANYTHING

AND TO FIND ANY WAY TO DO BETTER AND STICK TO IT.

HI! COME ON IN.

-RENEE. -YES.

HI, I'M LOLA.

HI, LOLA. COME ON IN.

GRAB A SEAT.

**

OKAY.

SO, LET'S TALK A LITTLE BIT JUST ABOUT YOUR LIFE.

NOW, RENEE, HAVE YOU EVER BEEN VERBALLY ABUSED?

[ SCOFFS ] OH, YES.

IN YOUR LIFETIME, HAVE YOU EVER BEEN PHYSICALLY ABUSED?

MANY TIMES.

HAVE YOU EVER BEEN SEXUALLY ABUSED?

YES.

CAN YOU TELL ME A LITTLE BIT ABOUT THE ABUSE

YOU'VE EXPERIENCED?

THE VERBAL ABUSE PROBABLY STARTED WITH MY MOM.

MY MOM REALLY DIDN'T WANT TO HAVE NOTHING TO DO WITH ME.

SO, YOU FELT SOMEWHAT NEGLECTED BY YOUR MOM.

FOR ALL MY LIFE.

FOR ALL YOUR LIFE YOU'VE FELT NEGLECTED.

EVEN ON HER DEATHBED.

YOU MENTIONED PHYSICAL ABUSE.

WHO PHYSICALLY ABUSED YOU?

BESIDES MY EXES, MY MOM PHYSICALLY ABUSED ME.

YOU KNOW, SHE ATTACKED ME WITH A HAMMER AT ONE POINT IN TIME.

NOW, RENEE, HOW OLD WERE YOU

WHEN YOU RECALL BEING SEXUALLY ABUSED?

THE FIRST TIME I WAS LIKE 9, BY MY MAMA'S BOYFRIEND.

DID YOU EVER DISCLOSE TO ANYONE WHAT WAS HAPPENING?

WELL, MY MOM ACTUALLY WENT IN AND FOUND HIM, SEEN HIM.

AND NOTHING HAPPENED?

RIGHT.

I'M SO SORRY THAT YOU WENT THROUGH THAT.

I THINK IT WAS JUST ANOTHER THING

THAT SOLIDIFIED THAT SHE HATED ME.

SO WHERE IS YOUR SELF-ESTEEM AT TODAY?

PSHH.

THERE ARE SOME DAYS I LOOK IN THE MIRROR, AND I LIKE MY FACE.

AND THERE ARE SOME DAYS I LOOK IN THE MIRROR,

AND I DON'T LIKE MY FACE.

AND I SAY THAT BECAUSE SOMETIMES I SEE MY MOM WHEN I SEE MY FACE,

SO THAT'S WHY.

IT'S IMPORTANT TO KEEP PROCESSING THE THINGS

THAT YOU'VE EXPERIENCED IN YOUR LIFE

SO THAT THEY DON'T HOLD YOU HOSTAGE.

YOU HOLD THE KEY TO YOUR OWN FREEDOM,

AND YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO USE IT.

SO I'D LIKE TO GIVE YOU SOME HOMEWORK ASSIGNMENTS,

AND I WANT YOU TO WRITE ABOUT YOUR LIFE EXPERIENCES,

BUT WITH THE TWIST WHERE YOU TALK ABOUT

HOW YOU CAME OUT ON THE OTHER SIDE STRONGER

FROM WHAT YOU'VE BEEN THROUGH.

**

OOH, OKAY.

YOU'RE THE HEROINE IN YOUR STORY.

I WILL TRY.

I WILL DO MY BEST TO TRY.

AND I'LL DO MY BEST TO HELP YOU ALONG THE WAY.

THANK YOU, LOLA.

**

TILL NEXT TIME, RENEE.

YES, UNTIL NEXT TIME.

**

I KNOW I HAVE A LOT OF ISSUES AND A LOT OF PAIN

THAT'S LED TO ME EATING.

I JUST NEVER REALLY THOUGHT I COULD DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT.

LOLA SAID I HOLD THE KEY TO MY OWN FREEDOM,

AND I JUST HAVE TO USE THAT.

SO, I'M GONNA START JOURNALING LIKE SHE SAID,

BECAUSE I DON'T WANT TO TURN TO FOOD.

I JUST HOPE IT HELPS ME.

**

I'M HEADED TO SEE DR. NOW AGAIN, AND I'M REALLY SCARED RIGHT NOW.

EVERYTHING DEPENDS ON THIS NEXT APPOINTMENT

AND WHETHER I HIT MY GOAL.

I'VE TRIED MY HARDEST,

AND NOT ONLY HAVE I BEEN STICKING TO THE DIET

AND EXERCISE I'M SUPPOSED TO,

I'VE BEEN JOURNALING LIKE THE THERAPIST TOLD ME TO DO,

AND I FEEL LIKE I'M STARTING TO WORK THROUGH SOME ISSUES.

I JUST WISH I HAD MORE TIME.

BUT I KNOW DR. NOW IS WORRIED

THAT I'M NOT GONNA LAST MUCH LONGER

IF I DON'T START DOING WHAT I NEED.

SO I HAVE TO USE THE TIME I HAVE.

RENEE BIRAN?

I WAS 471 POUNDS WHEN I LEFT THE HOSPITAL A MONTH AGO,

AND MY WEIGHT-LOSS GOAL FOR THE PAST MONTH WAS 30 POUNDS.

SO I NEED TO BE BELOW 441 TODAY.

[ PANTING ]

**

IT'S JUST ONE POUND AWAY, BUT I'M SO WORRIED NOW

WHAT THE DOCTORS ARE GOING TO SAY,

AND I JUST HOPE IT'S GONNA BE ENOUGH.

I'M SO CLOSE, AND I'VE WORKED SO HARD.

**

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

HI, RENEE. GOOD TO SEE YOU.

HI, DR. NOW.

SO, YOU'RE DOWN TO 442 TODAY.

I GAVE YOU A WEIGHT-LOSS GOAL TO LOSE 30 POUNDS IN 1 MONTH,

AND YOU LOST 29.

I HAVE BEEN TRYING, AND I HAVE BEEN STICKING

TO WHAT I NEEDED TO DO TO LOSE.

WELL, YOU WERE LOSING FOUR POUNDS A MONTH

ON YOUR OWN BEFORE THAT, SO THIS IS GOOD IMPROVEMENT.

AND I'LL SAY IT'S CLOSE ENOUGH.

SO I'M APPROVING YOU FOR WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY.

GET OUT OF HERE. ARE YOU SERIOUS?

YES.

ARE YOU SERIOUS?

YES.

OKAY?

THIS AIN'T APRIL FOOLS, IS IT?

BUT THERE IS ONE CONDITION, OKAY?

OKAY.

JUST AS LONG AS I GET SURGERY.

YOU SPENT FOUR MONTHS NOT LOSING.

I JUST NEED A LITTLE BIT MORE ASSURANCE

THAT THIS WEIGHT LOSS IS NOT TEMPORARY.

ALL RIGHT.

SO I'M GOING TO SCHEDULE YOUR SURGERY FOR ONE MONTH FROM NOW.

OKAY.

AND WHEN WE ADMIT YOU TO THE HOSPITAL,

WE ARE GOING TO CHECK YOUR WEIGHT,

AND I'M ALSO GOING TO HAVE A WALKING TEST FOR YOU.

AND IF YOU CAN DO IT AND YOU'RE LOSING WEIGHT,

THEN WE'LL MOVE AHEAD.

SO JUST KEEP AT IT AND YOU SHOULD BE FINE, OKAY?

THANK YOU. OH, MY GOD, THANK YOU.

ALL RIGHT. I'LL SEE YOU IN A MONTH,

AND KEEP MOVING IN THE RIGHT DIRECTION UNTIL THEN.

ALL RIGHT.

AND IF YOU NEED ANYTHING IN THE MEANTIME, CALL ME.

OKAY.

ALL RIGHT, RENEE. WE'LL TAKE CARE OF YOU, OKAY?

THANK YOU, DR. NOW. THANK YOU SO MUCH.

YOU'RE WELCOME.

Dr. Nowzaradan: RENEE HAS MADE A GOOD IMPROVEMENT

OVER THIS PAST MONTH,

BUT I NEED HER TO SHOW ME THAT SHE CAN KEEP DOING THIS

A LITTLE BIT LONGER

AND THAT SHE'S GOING TO HAVE ENOUGH STAMINA

AND LUNG CAPACITY TO SURVIVE THE SURGERY.

SO IT IS VERY IMPORTANT THAT SHE STICKS TO IT AND DOES THIS,

BECAUSE IF SHE DOESN'T,

SHE WON'T BE READY TO MOVE AHEAD,

AND WE WILL CANCEL THE SURGERY.

AND SHE CAN'T AFFORD TO HAVE ANY SETBACK RIGHT NOW.

**

**

Dr. Nowzaradan: WE ADMITTED RENEE TO THE HOSPITAL TO RUN SOME TESTS

TO MAKE SURE SHE'S PHYSICALLY ABLE TO UNDERGO SURGERY.

SO WE'RE GOING TO CHECK HER WEIGHT TODAY

TO SEE IF SHE HAS MADE ANY PROGRESS

AND ALSO HAVE A WALKING TEST FOR HER

TO SEE WHAT HER STAMINA IS.

AND IF SHE DOES WELL WITH BOTH OF THOSE,

THEN WE WILL MOVE AHEAD

WITH HER WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY THAT IS SCHEDULED FOR TOMORROW.

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

COME IN.

**

HI, RENEE. HOW ARE YOU?

ARE YOU GONNA BE READY FOR SURGERY TOMORROW?

I'M READY NOW.

LET'S GO DO IT RIGHT NOW.

[ LAUGHS ] FIRST THING'S FIRST.

WE RAN ALL YOUR MEDICAL TESTS, AND EVERYTHING LOOKS GOOD.

SO NOW ALL THAT IS LEFT IS FOR YOU TO SHOW ME

YOUR CONTINUED WEIGHT LOSS AND STAMINA.

OKAY.

SO WE'RE GONNA KILL TWO BIRDS WITH ONE STONE.

WE NEED TO CHECK YOUR WEIGHT,

BUT THE SCALE IS DOWN THE HALL IN ANOTHER ROOM.

I WANT YOU TO WALK THERE WITH ME TO SHOW ME YOUR STAMINA.

YOU THINK YOU CAN DO THAT FOR ME?

YES, SIR.

TO GET MY SURGERY, I CAN DO THAT.

ALL RIGHT,

SO I'LL GO GET WHEELCHAIR TO FOLLOW YOU FOR SAFETY.

OKEYDOKEY.

**

Renee: I'M SO NERVOUS RIGHT NOW.

I DON'T KNOW HOW FAR I'M WALKING,

AND I'M JUST HOPING I CAN DO IT.

ALL RIGHT, RENEE. YOU READY TO DO THIS?

YES, SIR. I WANT TO WALK.

YOU DON'T NEED WALKER OR ANYTHING?

NO, I'M READY TO GO.

**

LOOK AT YOU GO. YOU'RE DOING GREAT.

**

OKAY, THAT'S ENOUGH.

I DON'T WANT YOU TO PUSH YOURSELF TOO HARD AT ONCE.

**

PHEW!

I AM IMPRESSED.

YOU SHOWED ME YOUR MOBILITY AND YOUR STAMINA,

SO I THINK YOUR LUNGS ARE GETTING BETTER.

YOU NEED TO DO THAT MORE OFTEN.

WELL, ROME WASN'T BUILT IN A DAY, NOR IS MY BIKINI BODY.

WELL, YOU'RE RIGHT ABOUT THAT.

OKAY, WE CAN ROLL YOU DOWN TO THE SCALE.

**

SO, NOW LET'S SEE IF YOU HAVE BEEN

MAKING ANY PROGRESS WITH YOUR WEIGHT LOSS.

**

ALL RIGHT. NOW IT HAS ZEROED.

OKAY.

**

YOU WERE AT 442 A MONTH AGO.

LET'S SEE WHERE YOUR WEIGHT IS NOW.

[ BEEPING ]

423.

THAT'S LOSS OF 19 POUNDS.

-YES. -BE CAREFUL.

THANK GOD.

PHEW.

SO, CONGRATULATIONS.

TOMORROW, YOU'RE HAVING SURGERY.

**

RENEE HAS DONE WELL, AND I AM PROUD OF HER ON HER PROGRESS.

FOR HER, 20 TO 30 POUNDS' WEIGHT LOSS IS VERY BIG,

AND SHE WAS ABLE TO WALK A GOOD DISTANCE.

SO WE WILL GET HER TO SURGERY TOMORROW,

AND SHE CAN TAKE HER NEXT BIG STEP WITH HER PROGRESS.

**

Renee: DR. NOW SEEMED PRETTY PROUD WITH MY PROGRESS,

AND HONESTLY, I AM, AS WELL.

AND RIGHT NOW, I FEEL THE BEST THAT I HAVE FELT

IN AT LEAST 10 YEARS.

BUT I'M STILL NERVOUS ABOUT WHAT COULD HAPPEN TOMORROW.

**

**

NOW THAT SURGERY'S HERE, I'M REALLY NERVOUS,

BECAUSE, YOU KNOW, I JUST DON'T KNOW WHAT TO EXPECT.

AND I CAN ONLY TRUST DR. NOW AND HOPE EVERYTHING WILL BE OKAY.

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

**

HI, RENEE.

GOOD MORNING, DR. NOW.

GOOD MORNING. HOW DO YOU FEEL THIS MORNING?

ARE YOU READY FOR THIS?

I'M READY AS WELL AS I'M EVER GONNA BE.

ALL RIGHT. WELL, WE GO AHEAD AND GET YOU FIXED UP TODAY,

DO A SLEEVE ON YOU, AND THIS IS GONNA HELP YOU

TO BE ABLE TO LOSE SOME MORE WEIGHT

AND EASIER TO CONTROL YOUR EATING HABIT.

-SOUNDS GOOD. -ALL RIGHT.

DID YOU GET SOME REST LAST NIGHT?

DID YOU GET SOME REST?

WELL-RESTED.

OKAY, THAT'S THE MAIN CONCERN.

I CAN SLEEP AFTERWARDS.

WE'LL GET YOU STARTED IN A FEW MINUTES, OKAY?

OKAY. I'M READY.

ALL RIGHT, GOOD.

THANK YOU.

YOU'RE WELCOME.

**

-THERE'S MY BOY. -HEY, WHAT'S GOING ON?

Hannah: YOU READY?

HEY, I'M MORE THAN READY TO GET THIS OVER WITH.

I LOVE YOU ALL, AND I'M GLAD Y'ALL MADE IT.

THAT MEANS MORE THAN, YOU KNOW, YOU ALL CAN EVER IMAGINE.

OH, YEAH. WE LOVE YOU.

I AIN'T DONE SAID NO GOODBYES.

I'LL SEE YOU LATER.

ALL RIGHT. I LOVE YOU.

I LOVE YOU, TOO.

I'LL SEE YOU WHEN YOU GET DONE.

ALL RIGHT. Y'ALL BE GOOD.

-YOU TOO. -OKAY.

Renee: I'M SCARED OF THE RISKS OF UNDERGOING SURGERY,

ESPECIALLY WITH HOW BAD MY HEALTH HAS BEEN.

THERE'S A CHANCE THAT SOMETHING COULD GO WRONG,

BUT I HAVE NO DOUBT ABOUT MOVING FORWARD WITH THIS

BECAUSE I KNOW THIS SURGERY IS REALLY THE ONLY CHANCE

I HAVE TO GETTING THE LIFE THAT I WANT TO HAVE.

SO I'M DOING THIS NO MATTER WHAT.

**

Dr. Nowzaradan: RENEE HAS HAD TO COME A LONG WAY TO GET THIS SURGERY.

HER CONDITION WAS EXTREMELY POOR WHEN SHE ARRIVED.

SO WE HAVE HAD TO WORK EXTREMELY HARD TO GET HER BODY

TO A PLACE WHERE SHE CAN SURVIVE A SURGERY.

WE CAN TURN THE ROOM LIGHT OFF.

GASTRONOMY IS AN OPERATION THAT REDUCES THE STOMACH BY 90%,

LEAVING A LONG, SKINNY TUBE THAT LOOK LIKE A SLEEVE

THAT CONNECT THE ESOPHAGUS TO THE SMALL INTESTINE.

AFTER SURGERY, THERE IS A CHANGE IN THE METABOLISM,

AND THE PATIENT'S FOOD INTAKE IS PHYSICALLY LIMITED,

SO THIS WILL GIVE THEM AN OPPORTUNITY

TO BEGIN LOSING WEIGHT.

**

I JUST TRUST THAT -- I JUST HOPE EVERYTHING GOES WELL.

FAITH IS THE ONLY THING THAT'S KEEPING ME STRONG

THROUGH EVERYTHING.

BUT I'M READY FOR EVERYTHING TO GET OVER WITH JUST LIKE SHE IS.

**

THERE. THAT'S HER STOMACH.

ALL RIGHT. THE ROOM LIGHT ON.

ALL RIGHT. WE'RE DONE.

RENEE'S SURGERY WENT VERY WELL.

WE WERE ABLE TO COMPLETE HER OPERATION

IN SHORT PERIOD OF TIME

AND KEEP A LOT OF STRAIN OFF HER BODY.

SO WE WILL GET HER TO RECOVERY,

AND WE WILL KEEP HER UP SOON TO KEEP HER MOVING AROUND

TO PREVENT ANY BLOOD CLOT FROM FORMING.

BUT SHE SHOULD BE ABLE TO LOSE 20 TO 30 POUNDS

IN THE FIRST MONTH AFTER SURGERY,

AND THEN 20 TO 25 POUNDS THE FOLLOWING MONTH,

UNTIL SHE GETS CLOSE TO HER TARGET WEIGHT.

BUT RENEE HAS A VERY LONG ROAD AHEAD OF HER.

SHE HAS A LOT OF EMOTIONAL ISSUES

THAT SHE'S GOING TO NEED TO WORK WITH PSYCHOTHERAPY TO DEAL WITH,

OR THEY WILL START TO COME TO THE SURFACE

AND SLOWLY LEAD HER BACK TO OVEREATING IF SHE DOESN'T.

BUT RENEE CANNOT ALLOW HERSELF TO GO BACK TO THE WAY SHE WAS,

ESPECIALLY NOW THAT SHE HAS HAD SURGERY,

BECAUSE HER BODY WON'T BE ABLE TO TAKE IT.

SO WE CAN'T LET THAT HAPPEN.

**

Woman: RENEE BIRAN?

Renee: IT'S BEEN ABOUT A MONTH SINCE MY SURGERY, AND I'M DOING WELL.

I'M ABLE TO WALK AND GET AROUND NOW

WITHOUT HAVING TO CONSTANTLY SIT DOWN.

**

SO I THINK MY WEIGH-IN WILL BE GOOD TODAY.

**

-OH, MY GOD! -HEY. [ LAUGHS ]

WONDERFUL.

-OH! -WONDERFUL.

[ LAUGHS ]

Renee: WHEN I SAW THAT NUMBER, IT'S LIKE WAKING UP AT CHRISTMAS

AND SEEING EVERYTHING YOU WISHED FOR.

I HOPE DR. NOW SAYS THAT I'M DOING A GOOD JOB

AND THAT I'M DOING THE RIGHT THING

THAT HE WANTS ME TO BE DOING.

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ] COME IN.

HI, RENEE.

HI, DR. NOW.

HOW ARE YOU ALL DOING?

ALL RIGHT. HOW YOU DOING?

-I'M GOOD. -ALL RIGHT.

YOU GOT THE WHOLE FAMILY, HUH?

THAT'S GREAT.

SO, TODAY, YOU'RE DOWN TO 403.

YES.

AND THAT'S TOTAL OF 228 POUND THIS PAST YEAR.

SO, DO YOU FEEL ANY BETTER NOW?

I FEEL TERRIFIC.

I ACTUALLY WALKED IN THE OFFICE TODAY

AND WALKED BACK HERE TO THE ROOM.

-WELL, THAT'S WONDERFUL. -YES.

-[ LAUGHS ] -YOU SEE I DON'T HAVE MY WHEELS.

SO, YOU ARE MAKING GOOD PROGRESS AND I'M PROUD OF YOU FOR THAT.

SO, KEEP IT UP, AND IN A FEW MONTHS,

WE CAN START TO DISCUSS...MORE.

-OKAY. -OKAY?

THAT SOUND GOOD?

THAT SOUNDS WONDERFUL.

SO, I'M VERY HAPPY TO SEE YOUR KIDS WITH YOU TO HELP YOU

AND GIVING YOU THE SUPPORT YOU NEED.

WHEN YOU FIRST ARRIVED,

YOU WERE IN ONE OF THE WORST SHAPE I'VE EVER SEEN.

AND NOW YOUR HEART, YOUR LUNGS, AND EVEN YOUR KIDNEYS

ARE FUNCTIONING A LOT BETTER.

I FEEL GREAT.

SO IN A YEAR, I WANT YOU TO BE 180 POUNDS.

[ LAUGHS ] 180 POUNDS IS SHOCKING, BUT OKAY.

I JUST WANT TO THANK YOU FOR ALL THE TIMES

WHEN I BUTTED HEADS WITH YOU AND YOU DIDN'T GIVE UP ON ME.

WELL, RENEE, THAT'S MY JOB TO TAKE CARE OF YOU,

AND I APPRECIATE THAT.

BUT I'M PROUD OF YOU FOR STICKING WITH THE PROGRAM.

THANK YOU.

THANKS FOR GIVING MY MOM BACK, YOU KNOW?

THANKS FOR HELPING CHANGE HER LIFE.

AND, YOU KNOW, IT'S BEEN 15 YEARS SINCE I BEEN ABLE

TO SIT ON THE FRONT PORCH WITH HER, YOU KNOW?

SO I APPRECIATE THAT.

YOU'RE MORE THAN WELCOME.

-THANK YOU, SIR. -THANK YOU.

ALL RIGHT. Y'ALL TAKE CARE.

-YOU TOO. HAVE A GOOD DAY. -YOU TOO. HAVE A GOOD DAY.

THANK YOU, DR. NOW. -YOU TOO.

SURE. BYE-BYE.

Dr. Nowzaradan: RENEE HAD A BUMPY ROAD FOR A BIT, BUT SHE'S WORKING HARD NOW,

AND I'M VERY PROUD OF HER FOR THE PROGRESS SHE'S MAKING.

SHE HAS MADE ONE OF THE BIGGEST RECOVERIES I HAVE EVER SEEN,

SO I HAVE HIGH HOPES FOR RENEE.

Renee: I'M, LIKE, OVERJOYED RIGHT NOW.

DR. NOW JUST DON'T HAND OUT COMPLIMENTS.

YOU KNOW, YOU HAVE TO DESERVE THEM TO GET THEM FROM HIM.

I MEAN, DR. NOW SAID THAT I WAS ONE OF THE WORST PATIENTS

HE'S SEEN WALK IN HERE.

AND TO SEE ME HERE NOW TODAY

HEALTHY AND BEING ABLE TO WALK IN,

THAT'S NOTHING SHORT OF A MIRACLE.

I'VE LEARNED THAT DETERMINATION IS THE KEY.

WHEN YOU STEP ON THAT SCALE

AND THE NUMBERS ARE CONSTANTLY GOING DOWN,

IT'S MORE THAN WORTH IT.

IT'S LIKE WINNING THE LOTTERY WORTH IT.

BUT THANK GOD MY SON, HE CAME THROUGH,

'CAUSE THAT MADE IT EASIER.

I WOULD NOT WANT NOBODY ELSE BUT MY SON

TO SHARE THIS ACCOMPLISHMENT WITH ME BUT HIM.

THIS HAS BEEN

THE MOST POSITIVE THING I'VE EVER DONE IN MY LIFE.

THERE'S A NEW RENEE IN TOWN. SHE'S HERE TO STAY.

**

**

I'M SO THANKFUL FOR THIS PAST YEAR

AND THE HELP I'VE BEEN GIVEN,

ESPECIALLY FOR DR. NOW.

HE'S THE BEST DOCTOR I'VE EVER HAD.

**

WHOA.

AND HE'S COMPLETELY CHANGED MY LIFE,

BECAUSE NOW I CAN GO OUT AND DO THINGS.

-HI. WELCOME IN. -HI!

WHEN I WAS SCARED TO DO ANYTHING BEFORE, I HID FROM THE WORLD.

AND EVEN THOUGH I HAVE A LONG WAY TO GO,

I'M SO THANKFUL FOR HOW MUCH MY LIFE HAS CHANGED ALREADY.

THE LAST TIME I BEEN IN A BOOKSTORE HAS BEEN DECADES.

I FORGOT HOW GOOD IT FELT.

I DIDN'T THINK THAT I WOULD EVER, EVER DO IT.

YOU KNOW, I THOUGHT THAT I WOULD JUST BE LAYING IN A BED

FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE.

AND HERE I AM.

YOU KNOW, I'M SITTING INSIDE OF A PUBLIC BUILDING.

I'VE CAME SO FAR IN JUST REALLY A SHORT AMOUNT OF TIME.

**

I KNOW I HAVE A LOT OF WORK TO DO STILL,

AND DR. NOW WARNED ME

THAT I HAVE TO KEEP DEALING WITH EMOTIONAL ISSUES.

SO I'M DOING MY JOURNALING AND STICKING THROUGH IT

AND TRYING TO WORK THROUGH AND REALLY LET OUT MY EMOTIONS

THAT I'VE KEPT IN FOR SO LONG.

BUT I KNOW THAT'S GONNA TAKE A WHILE

AS I KEEP WORKING WITH LOLA TO DO THAT.

AND IT MAY BE REALLY PAINFUL,

BUT I'M NO LONGER GIVING UP CONTROL OF MY LIFE TO PAIN.

I'M FINALLY GETTING MY LIFE BACK

AFTER ALMOST LOSING IT SO MANY TIMES,

AND I'M NEVER GIVING IT UP AGAIN.