All language subtitles for My 600-lb Life S05E07

Diana:
THIS IS A PATHETIC LIFE.

I NEVER, EVER THOUGHT
THIS WOULD HAPPEN TO ME.

Man: NOT FOR ONE MINUTE
THAT I THOUGHT MY LIFE

WOULD END UP LIKE THIS.

OW! MY LEGS!

Ashley: I'M SO FAR GONE.

Woman #1:
I ABSOLUTELY NEED HELP,

OR I AM GONNA DIE.

-I CAN'T DO THIS.
-I'M RIGHT UNDER YOU.

-[ Crying ] I NEED OVER!
-YOU'RE FINE. YOU'RE FINE.

Woman #2:
I FEEL LIKE I LET MY KIDS DOWN.

INSTEAD OF ME
TAKING CARE OF THEM,

THEY'VE BEEN TAKING CARE OF ME.

IT'S YOU -- YOU ARE
THE ONE KILLING HIM.

Woman: DO I THINK SHE HAS THE
MOTIVATION TO DO IT ON HER OWN?

I HAVE
NO [BLEEP] IDEA.

SHE NEVER PROVED TO ME
SHE DID IT ON HER OWN.

SHE JUST PROVED
THAT SHE COULD DO IT WITH ME.

-- Captions by VITAC --
www.vitac.com

CAPTIONS PAID FOR BY
DISCOVERY COMMUNICATIONS

Diana:
TAKING A LEAP OF FAITH

INTO THE UNKNOWN
SEEMS IMPOSSIBLE

UNLESS YOU'RE WILLING
TO REPLACE FEAR WITH HOPE.

[ SIGHS ]

OH, GOSH. OH.

WHEN YOU'RE MORBIDLY OBESE,

EVERYDAY LIFE,
JUST GETTING THROUGH IT,

IT IS MISERABLE.

PAIN IS A CONSTANT VISITOR
THROUGHOUT MY DAY.

BUT MY LEGS
ARE WHAT HURT THE WORST.

I HAVE LYMPHEDEMA IN MY LEGS
AND OPEN SORES.

SO THAT IS JUST STABBING PAIN.

AND THEN THE REST OF THE TIME,
IT'S A THROBBING PAIN.

OH, MY GOSH.

OH. OW.

JUST GETTING OUT OF BED
IS PROBLEMATIC.

I ABSOLUTELY DREAD IT.

I SIT ON THE SIDE OF THE BED,

WAITING TO GET
THE COURAGE TO STAND UP

'CAUSE I KNOW
THE PAIN IS COMING.

OH. OH.

SO I PAY A PRICE WITH
EVERY SINGLE STEP I TAKE.

[ GROANS ]

THERE IS NO PAIN-FREE STEP
EVER IN MY DAY.

AND BY THE TIME I'M UP
AND I MAKE IT TO THE SHOWER,

MY LEGS ARE IN
EXCRUCIATING PAIN,

AND I'M ALREADY OUT OF BREATH.

ONE OF THE MOST
DEVASTATING THINGS

ABOUT MY WEIGHT GAIN
IS THE FACT

THAT I HAVE TO HAVE
PEOPLE CARE FOR ME NOW.

Diana: HEY, TRAC.
HEY.

CAN YOU HELP ME
WITH THE SHOWER CURTAIN?

SURE.

SO MY BEST FRIEND TRACY
COMES OVER A FEW TIMES A WEEK

TO HELP ME BATHE
AND CLEAN UP THE HOUSE.

OH.

IT'S HUMILIATING.

BECAUSE I NEED HELP
IN THE SHOWER,

I CAN'T SHOWER EVERY DAY.

I HAVE TO ONLY SHOWER
THREE TIMES A WEEK.

I WANT TO DO AS MUCH AS I CAN
ON MY OWN.

BUT IT'S VERY HARD FOR ME

TO GET EVERYTHING
NICE AND CLEAN.

HEY, TRAC.

I'M GONNA LIFT MY SKIN UP.
Tracy: OKAY.

CAN YOU VERY, VERY SLOWLY
WASH THE FLAB?

OKAY.

LOWER.

BECAUSE I'M SO BIG,

JUST DAILY ACTIVITIES THAT
I SHOULD BE ABLE TO DO MYSELF,

I'M NOT ABLE TO DO ANYMORE.

I AM REQUIRING
MORE AND MORE CARE FROM OTHERS.

GOSH. OH.

AND THAT SCARES ME.

OH, THIS IS
NOT COUNTING.

WHEN I GET DONE WITH MY SHOWER,

I JUST WANT TO GET OUT
OF THE BATHROOM QUICKLY

SO I DON'T SEE MYSELF
IN THE MIRROR.

I'M JUST HORRIFIED
BY WHAT I LOOK LIKE.

COME ON.
WE'RE WALKING.

OKAY.

I DON'T LOOK LIKE A BODY SHAPE.
IT'S JUST A BLOB OF FAT.

I DON'T LOOK HUMAN.

OH.

[ MOANS ]

I THINK I LOOK LIKE
JABBA THE HUT.

MY BODY IS JUST DETERIORATING.

I'M JUST GONNA DO
THE WATER BLISTERS FIRST.

OKAY.
THEN I'LL DO...

I HAVE A LOT OF
WEIGHT-RELATED ILLNESSES.

THE WORST ONE IS LYMPHEDEMA.

MY LEGS ARE ALWAYS VERY SWOLLEN.

I HAVE OPEN WOUNDS A LOT.

SO TRACY PUTS CREAMS
AND OINTMENTS ON

TO MAKE SURE I DON'T GET RASHES.

AND IF SHE DIDN'T, I CAN'T
IMAGINE HOW BAD IT WOULD GET.

I AM BEING CARED FOR LIKE
AN INVALID BECAUSE OF MY WEIGHT,

AND THE TRUTH OF THE MATTER IS
I AM AN INVALID

BECAUSE OF MY WEIGHT.

AND THAT'S ALL BECAUSE
I WON'T STOP EATING.

WHEN I WAKE UP, THE FIRST THING
I THINK ABOUT IS FOOD.

BUT IN THE MORNING, I TRY NOT
TO MAKE THE SAME MISTAKES AGAIN.

SO I START BY EATING
JUST A LITTLE.

BUT I KNOW
BEFORE THE DAY IS HALF DONE,

I'M GOING TO GIVE IN AGAIN
AND JUST EAT EVERYTHING I CAN.

WHEN I'M EATING SOMETHING,

IT'S NOT JUST THAT
IT TASTES GOOD IN MY MOUTH.

IT TASTES GOOD IN MY WHOLE BODY.

MY WHOLE BODY'S INVOLVED

IN THAT RUSH OF PLEASURE,
IN CHOMPING.

OH.

OUCH.

I EAT WHEN I'M HAPPY,
AND FOOD CELEBRATES WITH ME.

AND I EAT WHEN I'M STRESSED.

EVERY EMOTION
IS TAKEN CARE OF BY FOOD.

AND WHEN THAT HAPPENS...

MY INTERNAL DIALOGUE
IS PRETTY NASTY TO MYSELF.

I'M WORTHLESS.

I AM A FREAK.

I TELL MYSELF
THAT I'M A TOTAL IDIOT

FOR ALLOWING THIS
TO HAPPEN TO ME.

SO NO MATTER WHAT, I CAN'T STOP

RELIVING THE SAME NIGHTMARE
EVERY DAY.

FOR THE MOST PART,

I DON'T FEEL LIKE MY EARLY
CHILDHOOD WAS THAT ABNORMAL.

BUT AS I GOT OLDER, THINGS
SEEMED TO GET MORE CHAOTIC.

I COME FROM A BIG FAMILY.

I HAVE THREE SISTERS
AND A BROTHER.

AND MY MOM WAS SICK
FOR A LONG TIME.

MY SISTER JULIA
HAD A CONGENITAL HEART PROBLEM,

AND MY DAD LOST HIS JOB
FOR A WHILE.

SO THERE WAS ALWAYS A CRISIS.

I THINK THE CHAOS IN MY FAMILY
MADE ME FEEL REALLY INSECURE.

I DIDN'T FEEL LIKE
THERE WAS A SAFE HARBOR FOR ME.

AND I LEARNED VERY YOUNG
THAT I REALLY WAS

THE ONLY PERSON
I COULD DEPEND ON,

AND AT TIMES,
THAT WAS A VERY LONELY THING.

AS A CHILD, DIANA WAS EXPECTED
TO BE ALMOST NON-EXISTENT

BECAUSE MY PARENTS WERE INVOLVED
WITH MY SISTER JULIA,

WHO HAD A HEART PROBLEM.

Diana: I FELT WORTHLESS,
AND I JUST WANTED SOMEBODY

TO GIVE ME ATTENTION
AND TREAT ME LIKE I EXISTED.

AND ONE DAY WHEN I WAS 11,
I WAS AT A SKATING RINK,

AND TWO OLDER BOYS
STARTED TALKING TO ME.

AND I WAS FLATTERED.

BUT WHEN THEY GOT ME ALONE,
THEY MOLESTED ME.

AND I NEVER TOLD ANYONE

BECAUSE I FELT LIKE
IT WAS SOMETHING I DID.

SO I PUSHED IT DOWN
AND NEVER TALKED TO ANYONE

BECAUSE I DIDN'T HAVE ANYONE.

WHEN I THINK BACK ABOUT
THE LITTLE GIRL THAT I WAS

AND ALL SHE WENT THROUGH,

I WOULD WANT TO GO BACK
AND PROTECT HER,

AND THERE WAS JUST
NOBODY THERE TO DO IT.

[ SNIFFLES ]

AND THAT LACK OF PROTECTION
SET MY PATH

FOR SUCH A VERY LONG TIME.

ALL I WANTED TO DO WAS EAT.

IT WAS SAFE.

IT WAS COMFORTING.

BUT I DIDN'T BECAUSE I ALSO HAD
A FEAR OF FOOD AT THE SAME TIME.

AND I DID END UP
WITH BODY ISSUES

BECAUSE MY MOM WAS VERY THIN,

AND ONE OF THE THINGS
SHE WANTED US GIRLS TO AVOID

WAS THE BURDEN OF BEING
A HEAVY PERSON, OF BEING FAT.

BUT THAT MESSAGE
REALLY TWISTED WITH ME

BECAUSE EVEN IN HIGH SCHOOL,

WHEN I WAS 5'6" AND PROBABLY
WEIGHED ABOUT 115 POUNDS,

I WAS ENCOURAGED TO BE DIETING.

AND I BELIEVED THAT I WAS HEAVY,

AND I THINK THAT'S WHEN
MY FOOD ADDICTION STARTED.

BUT I RESTRAINED MYSELF

AND DIDN'T RUN
TO THE ONE THING I WANTED.

SO I DIDN'T GAIN WEIGHT,

AND MY SIZE WASN'T A BIG ISSUE
UNTIL I WAS IN MY 20s.

I HAD DECIDED TO ENLIST
IN THE AIR FORCE,

AND I WENT IN TO GET WEIGHED.

AND I WAS 30 POUNDS HEAVIER

THAN I WAS ALLOWED TO BE
FOR MY HEIGHT.

I THINK I WAS 178 POUNDS
AT 5'6",

SO I STARTED DIETING HEAVILY,
THEN RUNNING A LOT.

WEIGHT WAS WAR.

AND I WORKED MY ASS OFF
TO BE SKINNY,

BUT I WAS NEVER ABLE
TO SUSTAIN THAT WEIGHT.

SO AT THAT POINT, I GAVE UP.

I WANTED TO SERVE MY COUNTRY,

AND THE TRUTH OF THE MATTER IS
I SERVED IT WELL.

BUT FAT DISQUALIFIED ME.

AND I GOT AN HONORABLE DISCHARGE

BUT DENIED REENLISTMENT
BECAUSE OF MY WEIGHT.

ALL THOSE YEARS,
ALL I WANTED TO DO WAS EAT.

I WANTED ALL THAT PAIN
TO GO AWAY.

I FIGURED, WHY FIGHT IT ANYMORE?

SO I JUST STARTED EATING.

AND I GAINED WEIGHT FAST.

AND BY THE TIME I HIT 30,
I WAS 200 POUNDS.

AND I KEPT --
THE FIRST ONE, I WAS SO --

BY THE TIME I WAS 40,
I WEIGHED 340 POUNDS.

BUT IT ALL GOT WORSE.

WHEN I WAS 46,
I MOVED TO SEATTLE

FOR A JOB OPPORTUNITY
WITH A HOMELESS SHELTER.

THE CAREER CHANGE
TO GO INTO THE SHELTER

WAS A GOOD CHANGE FOR ME.

REALLY FULFILLING.

BUT I CONTINUED TO STRUGGLE
WITH MY WEIGHT.

OUTSIDE OF WORK,

THERE WASN'T A LOT
OF OTHER FRIENDS,

SO FOOD WAS MY CONSTANT FRIEND.

I ATE ALL THE TIME,

AND WHEN I HIT 400 POUNDS,
I COULDN'T DO MY JOB ANYMORE.

AND I GOT LET GO.

AFTER I WAS FIRED,
MY EATING WENT OUT OF CONTROL.

I DIDN'T HAVE MY JOB.

I DIDN'T HAVE DAILY INTERACTION
WITH PEOPLE.

I WAS HOME-BOUND
FOR A LONG TIME.

THE ONLY CONSTANT I HAD
WAS FOOD.

DIANA'S WEIGHT HAS
ALWAYS BEEN AN ISSUE

AS I'VE BEEN GROWING UP.

SHE'S OVERWEIGHT BECAUSE
SHE EATS FAR TOO MUCH.

AND THERE'S NOTHING WE'VE BEEN
ABLE TO DO TO SLOW IT DOWN.

IT'S NOT JUST THAT
SHE LIKES FOOD.

IT'S NOT JUST THAT
SHE WANTS FOOD.

IT IS THE WAY IN WHICH
SHE SELF-MEDICATES.

NO DIFFERENT THAN AN ALCOHOLIC.

Diana:
SINCE I LOST MY JOB,

ALL I'VE DONE IS EAT
AND GAIN WEIGHT,

AND I WENT FROM 400 POUNDS
TO 600 POUNDS.

I CAN'T EVEN BELIEVE
THAT'S TRUE.

BUT I JUST CAN'T STOP EATING.

I THINK ABOUT FOOD CONSTANTLY.

IT IS ALWAYS ON MY MIND.

EITHER I'M FULL OR
I'M THINKING ABOUT EATING AGAIN,

AND THAT'S PRETTY MUCH
THE WAY IT GOES.

I CAN'T PHYSICALLY GO OUT
AND GET WHAT I WANT ANYMORE.

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]
COME ON IN.

I'M JUST TRYING
TO GET THE LIST TOGETHER.

Megan: LET ME KNOW
WHAT YOU NEED.

SO SOME OF MY FAMILY
WILL BRING ME WHAT I WANT.

OKAY, GREAT.

SEE YOU IN A FEW.

MY NIECE IS THE BIGGEST HELP

BECAUSE SHE DOES
ALL MY SHOPPING FOR ME.

I THINK AUNT DIANA IS IN DENIAL
THAT HER DISEASE,

HER ADDICTION, IS KILLING HER.

I MOVED MY FAMILY HERE
TO SEATTLE IN HOPES

THAT WE COULD HELP HER
CHANGE HER DIET AND LOSE WEIGHT.

BUT ALL SHE EVER ASKS FOR
IS JUNK FOOD.

AND IF I DON'T GET IT FOR HER,
SHE JUST GETS UPSET,

AND SHE'LL GET SOMEONE ELSE
TO GET IT.

SO I JUST GET HER THE JUNK FOOD.

RIGHT NOW, I HAVE A GROCERY CART

FULL OF WHAT I WOULD CONSIDER
NOT REALLY FOOD.

IT'S A LOT OF FROZEN MEALS AND
TONS OF SNACKS AND JUST JUNK.

I THINK IT'S PRETTY DISGUSTING.

WE HAVE TRIED TO HELP DIANA
CHANGE HER EATING HABITS

AND PROVIDE HER
WITH BETTER FOOD,

BUT SHE JUST DOESN'T WANT
TO EAT THAT FOOD.

SHE WANTS TO EAT UNHEALTHY,
AND SHE WANTS TO EAT A LOT.

AND SHE ALWAYS HAS EXCUSES
FOR WHY SHE NEEDS IT.

**

HEY.
Diana: HEY, SWEETHEART.

BUT SHE'S TIRED
OF HEARING ABOUT IT FROM US.

SO SHE HAS ME HIDE
ALL HER JUNK FOOD IN THE OVEN

SO ANYONE COMING OVER
DOESN'T SEE IT

AND GIVE HER A HARD TIME.

SO I JUST DON'T FIGHT IT.

OKAY.

IF THERE'S ANYTHING ELSE
I CAN DO, LET ME KNOW.

OKAY, SURE WILL.
YEAH.

TAKE CARE, SWEETHEART.
I WILL.

YOU, TOO.

Diana:
I'M SO THANKFUL FOR MEGAN.

I'D PROBABLY STARVE WITHOUT HER.

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

COME ON IN.

WHO DO I HAVE THERE?
SAY HI.

COME HERE.
GIVE ME A HUG.

CAN YOU GO GIVE AUNT DI
A HUG?

HI, BABY.
MEGAN AND HER FAMILY

ARE THE ONLY REAL
BRIGHT SPOT IN MY DAY.

A LOT OF DAYS,
SHE'LL BRING ME LUNCH

AND BRING HER DAUGHTERS OVER
SO I CAN SEE THEM.

HERE YOU GO.
ALL RIGHT, THANK YOU.

I HOPE
I GOT EVERYTHING RIGHT.

YEAH.
THANK YOU.

MY GRANDNIECES
ARE THE ONLY REASON

I GET UP SOME DAYS.

WOULD YOU MIND
GETTING ME A PLATE, PLEASE?

SURE.
ALL RIGHT, THANK YOU.

KNOWING THAT THEY'RE COMING OVER
AND I'LL GET TO SEE THEM

IS ALL I HAVE
TO LOOK FORWARD TO.

BUT ONCE I SEE
THE FOOD THEY BROUGHT,

ALL I CAN THINK ABOUT
IS EATING IT

BEFORE I DO ANYTHING ELSE.

THIS IS
MY FAVORITE PART --

THE LITTLE DESSERT PIE
THAT COMES WITH IT.

MMM.

DIANA'S IN A VICIOUS CYCLE
OF JUST SITTING AND EATING,

AND SITTING
AND WAITING AND EATING.

HEY, ANYA, I GOT A QUESTION
FOR YOU TWO GIRLS.

DO YOU GUYS WANT TO GO
TO THE PARK TODAY?

YEAH!
I WANT TO GO TO THE PARK.

OKAY.
SO WHY DON'T WE DO THAT?

WHEN ADDY AND ANYA,
MEGAN'S DAUGHTERS,

COME TO THE HOUSE, I ENJOY IT,

AND IT'S SO MUCH LOVE
AND ENERGY AND POSITIVENESS.

OKAY.

BUT I'M LIMITED
IN WHAT I CAN DO WITH THEM.

OKAY.

OH!

I ALWAYS TRY TO BE THAT FUN AUNT
THAT THEY'RE EXCITED TO SEE.

**

BUT THERE'S ONLY
SO MUCH YOU CAN DO

WHEN YOU CAN'T EVEN WALK.

SO, COME ON OVER HERE.

BUT I'M SO BIG,

ALL I CAN REALLY DO IS SIT
AND WATCH THEM PLAY,

AND IT'S SO HEARTBREAKING.

Man: DO YOU WANT TO PICK
AUNT DIANA SOME FLOWERS?

HONESTLY, GUYS,
I'M GETTING TIRED ALREADY.

SO I'M GONNA NEED
TO HEAD BACK.

IT'S SO EXHAUSTING TO EVEN
BE OUT IN MY WHEELCHAIR.

YEAH. OKAY.

BEFORE I'M EVEN OUT THAT LONG,
I HAVE TO GO BACK.

I LIVE IN THIS APARTMENT
WITH VERY, VERY FEW OUTINGS.

[ SIGHS ]
YOU'RE BACK!

I LOVE YOU.

GIVE ME KISS.

LOVE YOU, BABY.

WHEN THEY WALK OUT THE DOOR,

I FEEL THE ISOLATION
JUST SLAM BACK DOWN AGAIN.

PART OF IT IS BECAUSE I HAVE
SUCH JOY WHEN THEY COME HERE,

AND THEN THEY LEAVE AND I'M BACK
TO BEING VERY LONELY.

AND THAT'S VERY DIFFICULT
FOR ME.

CAN YOU SAY BYE-BYE?
BYE-BYE!

BYE-BYE!
I LOVE YOU!

SAY, "BYE, I LOVE YOU."
BYE!

[ SNIFFLES ]

EVEN THOUGH I KNOW
MY SISTER IS GONNA COME OVER

AND HELP ME GET IN BED,

I JUST FEEL
SO ISOLATED AND ALONE.

BECAUSE I AM LIVING MY LIFE
IN A 400-FOOT,

VERY SMALL APARTMENT.

AND AFTER THE GIRLS LEAVE,
OUTSIDE OF EATING,

THERE'S NOTHING FOR ME
TO LOOK FORWARD TO IN THE DAY.

AND I'M SO EXHAUSTED,
I JUST WANT TO GO BACK TO SLEEP.

BUT I CAN'T EVEN
DO THAT ON MY OWN.

SO MY SISTER COMES OVER
TO HELP ME IN THE DAY.

Mardi: I'M SHOCKED AND HURT
AND SADDENED FOR DIANA,

TO SEE HER IN THE SITUATION
THAT SHE IS...

OH.

...TO SEE HER
AT A POINT OF OBESITY

THAT IS ALMOST NOT SURVIVABLE.

**

AND WHEN I SEE MY SISTER,
IT JUST BREAKS MY HEART.

**

Diana:
THIS IS A PATHETIC LIFE.

NO ONE SHOULD LIVE LIKE THIS.

OKAY. ONE, TWO...

[ GRUNTS ]

THREE!

OH.

I KNOW I DON'T HAVE
MUCH TIME LEFT

IF I DON'T TAKE DRASTIC ACTION.

AND AT THIS POINT,

I AM SCARED
THAT I'M GONNA GO TO BED

AND NOT WAKE UP THE NEXT DAY.

**

**

Megan: YOU WANT TO HELP ME PACK?
YEAH.

THAT'LL BE A GOOD WAY
YOU CAN HELP.

COME AND PUT IT IN THE BOX.
ONE AT A TIME.

OH, GOOD JOB.

TODAY, MY FAMILY HAS COME
TO PACK ALL MY THINGS UP

SO I CAN MOVE TO HOUSTON.

MEGAN AND HER WHOLE FAMILY
ARE MOVING DOWN WITH ME

UNTIL I'M ABLE TO GET SURGERY
AND START LOSING SOME WEIGHT.

I KNOW THIS IS
A HUGE SACRIFICE FOR THEM,

AND I FEEL GUILTY THEY HAVE TO
UPROOT THEIR WHOLE LIFE

TO DO THIS FOR ME.

BUT I KNOW THIS IS
MY LAST CHANCE

TO GET THE HELP I NEED.

TODAY, AS WE GET READY TO LEAVE,
I'M JUST SCARED.

**

I HAVE A LOT OF ANXIETY
ABOUT TRAVELING.

BEING ABLE TO GET IN AND OUT
OF THE VAN IS A HUGE FEAR.

I HAVEN'T BEEN IN A PERSONAL
VEHICLE IN THE LAST YEAR.

HI.

HELLO.

ALL RIGHT.

OH, I GOT IT.
OKAY.

ALL RIGHT.
HERE WE GO.

ALL RIGHT, YOU STABLE?
YOU GOT IT?

YEP, I GOT IT.
NO PROBLEMS.

IF I DON'T GET HELP,

I KNOW THAT THIS APARTMENT
IS WHERE I'M GOING TO DIE.

[ GRUNTS ]

HOW YOU DOING?
I'M DOING OKAY.

AND SO I'M TAKING
A LEAP OF FAITH

AND MOVING TO HOUSTON
TO SEE DR. NOWZARADAN.

BUT THIS IS A HUGE EVENT FOR ME.

I NEED
TO LIFT MY NIGHTGOWN UP

BECAUSE I'M GONNA BE USING
THE BED PAN.

YEP.
SORRY.

SO I'M GONNA MOON EVERYBODY.
OKAY.

I'M COMING BACK,
I'M COMING BACK.

HOLD ON. I THINK I CAN
GO A LITTLE BIT FURTHER.

ONE, TWO, THREE.

GOOD.
OH!

THERE ARE SO MANY RISKS
FOR DIANA IN MOVING THIS FAR.

SHE IS NOT IN GOOD HEALTH.

SHE HAS BAD ASTHMA.

SHE GETS A LOT
OF SKIN INFECTIONS.

AND BECAUSE OF THAT,
I WORRY ABOUT HER.

OKAY.
OKAY.

I'M GOOD.
THANK YOU, GUYS.

[ CHUCKLES ] YEAH.

DIANA DOESN'T HAVE
ANY OTHER GOOD OPTIONS

FOR HELP AT ALL.

AND NOW WE ARE ALL
HEADED DOWN TO HOUSTON.

AND I HOPE
THAT THIS TRIP IS A SIGN

THAT SHE WANTS SOMETHING
BETTER FOR HERSELF.

SO WE'RE GONNA HELP HER TRY.

I'M ONLY GONNA SUPPORT
WHAT IS GOOD FOR HER,

AND IT IS GOING TO BE HARD.

I DON'T LIKE MOVING,

BUT SHE WILL BE DEAD IN A YEAR
IF WE DON'T.

**

Diana:
THE FURTHEST I'VE TRAVELED

IN THE LAST LITTLE WHILE
WAS BY AMBULANCE,

AND IT WAS FIVE MILES.

THE TRIP TO HOUSTON
IS 1,900 MILES.

I'VE NEVER DONE
ANYTHING LIKE THIS,

AND I DON'T EVEN KNOW
IF I CAN MAKE THE JOURNEY.

WE'VE HARDLY BEEN ON THE ROAD,
AND I'M ALREADY IN SO MUCH PAIN.

I AM NEEDING TO STOP.

UM, I'VE GOT TO GET
THIS BED ADJUSTED.

I'M SLIDING OFF
THE END OF IT.

I DON'T KNOW IF I CAN DO THIS.

OKAY, I NEED YOU TO LIFT
MY LEG BACK UP.

ALL MY WEIGHT
IS GOING INTO THIS HIP.

NO, I CAN'T --
I CAN'T GET OVER.

[ GRUNTS ]

ALL RIGHT, COME BACK.
SEE?

THIS HELPS.

[ SIGHS ]

I NEED YOU TO GET ME
HOOKED UP WITH THE CPAP.

OKAY.

ALL RIGHT.

[ WHIMPERS ]

OKAY.

**

[ COUGHING ]

IT'S ALL CONSTANT PAIN.

I'M USED TO CONSTANT PAIN,

BUT THIS IS
RATCHETING UP MY PAIN.

[ COUGHS ]

I HAD NO IDEA THIS WOULD BE
THIS HARD ON ME.

Mardi:
NEITHER DID I.

AND I DON'T KNOW THAT
I'M GONNA BE ABLE TO GET OUT

AND GET INTO
A HOTEL ROOM, MARDI.

I KNOW.

**

OKAY,
SO WHAT'S THE PLAN FOR ME?

WELL,
THAT'S UP TO YOU.

DO YOU FEEL LIKE YOU'RE STRONG
ENOUGH TO GET OUT OF THE CAR?

UH, LET ME SEE
HOW WE CAN DO THIS.

ONE, TWO, THREE.

OH. YEAH.

MY LEGS
ARE LOCKED ALREADY.

OH.

WANT US
TO PULL YOU UP?

NO, UH, LET ME
THINK THIS THROUGH.

OKAY.

I DON'T THINK I CAN GET OUT,
AND IF I DO,

I DON'T SEE HOW
WE'RE GONNA GET ME BACK IN.

I THINK I'LL JUST
SLEEP OUT HERE.

I'M STUCK IN THE VAN,

AND THERE'S NO WAY
I CAN GET OUT TONIGHT.

AND I CAN'T SLEEP
WITHOUT MY CPAP.

SO THE RISK WITHOUT MY CPAP

IS I COULD QUIT BREATHING
AT NIGHT,

MY AIRWAY WILL CLOSE.

SO I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO.

I NEED TO GRAB SOME STUFF
FROM THE CAR,

AND I WILL SEND PAUL
BACK DOWN.

ALL RIGHT.

I LOVE YOU.
I LOVE YOU.

OKAY.
I KNEW THIS TRIP WOULD BE HARD,

BUT THIS HAS TURNED INTO
A MATTER OF LIFE OR DEATH.

**

**

I'M SO SORRY.
Paul: IT'S OKAY.

Diana:
WE'VE BEEN DRIVING ALL DAY,

AND WE HAD TO STOP
FOR THE NIGHT.

BUT I'M STUCK IN THE PARKING LOT

BECAUSE I'M TOO BIG TO GET OUT
OF THE VAN WITHOUT HELP.

AND I HAVE TO HAVE MY CPAP
TO SLEEP AT NIGHT,

OR I'LL STOP BREATHING.

BUT LUCKILY, PAUL HAS
COME UP WITH A SOLUTION.

WE HAD TO ACTUALLY FASHION A WAY

TO PLUG THE CPAP
INTO AN OUTLET OF THE HOTEL,

RUNNING IT THROUGH THE WINDOW,
TAPING IT

SO THAT I'M GONNA BE ABLE
TO BREATHE TONIGHT.

OH.

IT'S VERY COMPLICATED FOR ME
TO BE OUTSIDE LIKE THIS.

THIS IS SO HUMILIATING.

BUT RIGHT NOW, I JUST NEED
TO MAKE IT TO DR. NOW

TO TRY TO GET SOME HELP.

**

LAST NIGHT WAS MISERABLE.

WE'RE ALMOST THERE.
ALL RIGHT.

YEAH.
GETTING ON THE ROAD NOW.

AND I'M JUST GLAD IT'S OVER
AND THAT WE'RE BACK ON THE ROAD.

WE STILL HAVE A LONG WAY TO GO,
AND I'M IN A LOT OF PAIN.

BUT THERE'S NO WAY I CAN SPEND
THE NIGHT IN THIS VAN AGAIN.

I DON'T THINK I'LL SURVIVE IT.

SO ONCE WE FIGURE OUT
WHERE WE'RE STAYING TONIGHT,

MARDI'S GONNA CALL E.M.S.
TO GET ME OUT OF THIS VAN.

I'VE BEEN MISERABLE
FOR TWO DAYS STRAIGHT,

AND I CANNOT WAIT
TO GET INTO A BED.

BUT IT'S EMBARRASSING

THAT I'M SO BIG, I CAN'T EVEN
GET OUT OF A VEHICLE BY MYSELF.

OKAY.
LOOKS LIKE WE'RE HERE.

**

MY SISTER --
SHE IS AN INVALID,

AND WE NEED A NON-URGENCE
ASSISTANCE FROM E.M.S.

TO CARRY HER INTO HER ROOM.

Diana:
A MAJOR EFFECT OF MY WEIGHT

THAT I DIDN'T REALLY THINK ABOUT

UNTIL I WAS ON THIS ROAD TRIP
IS MY INABILITY

TO GET IN AND OUT OF THE VAN,
MUCH LESS THE HOTEL.

ONE, TWO, THREE.

OKAY.

I DIDN'T REALIZE HOW
BASICALLY HANDICAPPED I AM.

WATCH YOUR ELBOW, MA'AM,
ON YOUR RIGHT ELBOW.

SO IT REALLY JUST HAS BROUGHT
HOME IN A REALLY TOUGH WAY

HOW DESPERATELY I NEED HELP.

ONE, TWO, THREE.

OOH!

OOH, SOMETHING'S ON MY LEG!
NO.

OH, I'M SORRY. IT'S NOT --
YOU'RE FINE.

IT'S EMBARRASSING THIS IS
WHAT IT TAKES JUST TO MOVE ME.

YOU ALL RIGHT?
I'M IN THE BED.

I'M GREAT.
THANK YOU. APPRECIATE IT.

NO PROBLEM.
SEE YOU TOMORROW MORNING, OKAY?

SEE YOU IN THE MORNING.
YEAH.

Diana: IF I'D KNOWN IT WAS
GONNA BE THIS HARD TO DO,

I'M NOT SURE I WOULD'VE MADE
THE DECISION TO GO TO HOUSTON.

**

I'VE BEEN ON THE ROAD
FOR FIVE DAYS NOW,

AND I'M JUST MISERABLE.

**

I REGRET LEAVING.
AND I REGRET DOING THIS.

THE ONLY THING
THAT GIVES ME PEACE RIGHT NOW

IS EATING SOMETHING.

WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE,
DEAR ONE?

OKAY, I WANT
THE COMBO WITH BACON.

I WANT ONION RINGS AND --
OH, AND I WANT A MILKSHAKE.

EATING ON THE ROAD
IS KIND OF TRICKY FOR ME.

THIS IS SOME OF THE LAST TIMES
THAT I GET TO ENJOY SOME FOODS

THAT PROBABLY AREN'T AS HEALTHY.

HERE YOU GO.

THANK YOU SO MUCH, MA'AM.
THANK YOU.

HAVE A GOOD DAY.
YOU, TOO.

**

THAT BURGER IS EXACTLY
WHAT I'VE BEEN NEEDING.

YUM.

I DON'T WANT TO GIVE UP
THE FOOD I LIKE,

AND I DON'T KNOW HOW I WILL,
BUT I'M WILLING TO TRY.

**

WE'RE FINALLY HERE,

AND I'M HAPPY
THIS DRIVE IS OVER.

BUT AS WE GET CLOSER, I'M ALSO
GETTING A LITTLE SCARED.

WHAT IF I CAN'T DO THIS
AND THE DOCTOR CAN'T HELP ME?

**

ALL RIGHT.

ONE FOR THE MONEY,
TWO FOR THE SHOW,

THREE TO GET READY,
FOUR TO GO.

OH, I DIDN'T MAKE IT.
HOLD ON.

OH. THANK YOU.
HERE WE GO.

ALL RIGHT.

SORRY.
I'M JUST SO TIRED FROM THE TRIP.

YEAH, RIGHT...NOW.

OKAY. [ GROANS ]
OKAY?

WE'RE STAYING AT A HOTEL AGAIN
BECAUSE MEGAN AND PAUL

HAVE TO GO SET UP
THE HOUSE WE'RE RENTING.

I OWE IT TO MY FAMILY

TO TRY AND DO THIS,
TO FIND A WAY,

BECAUSE THEY HAVE UPROOTED
THEIR WHOLE LIVES FOR ME.

OH. OKAY.

AND AS HARD AS IT WAS
FOR ME TO DO THIS,

I KNOW IT WAS REALLY HARD
FOR THEM, TOO.

HOW YOU DOING, SWEETHEART?
I'M DOING WELL.

THANK YOU.
YEAH?

YES.
GLAD TO BE...?

YEAH.

I FEEL LIKE ON THE ROAD,

DIANA WAS FAR NEEDIER
THAN MY KIDS.

WHICH, I MEAN, MY CHILDREN
ARE JUST BARELY TWO AND THREE.

SO THE NEXT MONTH OR TWO

IS GONNA BE VERY TELLING --
VERY TELLING.

SO, YOU GUYS
PRETTY WORN OUT?

IT'S EMOTIONALLY BEEN...
KIND OF TAXING

TO JUST FINALLY BE HERE
AND BE DONE

AND BE STARTING THE NEXT PIECE,
YOU KNOW?

YEAH.
NOW WE HAVE OTHER WORK.

RIGHT NOW, I KNOW WE HAVE
A NEW CHAPTER TO OPEN,

BUT WE'RE AT THE END
OF CHAPTER ONE, AND...

TAKE A DEEP BREATH?
Diana: YEAH.

AND CELEBRATE IT.

Megan: I'M EXCITED.

I'M VERY RELIEVED TO BE HERE.

BUT I THINK THAT
I DON'T SEE HER INVESTING.

SHE SAYS THINGS LIKE,

"WELL, I DON'T REALLY WANT TO
TALK ABOUT THE DIFFICULT THINGS.

I JUST WANT TO ENJOY RIGHT NOW."

WHICH, TO ME,
IS THE ADDICT IN HER SPEAKING.

GOODNIGHT, SWEETHEART.
GOODNIGHT.

LOVE YOU.
LOVE YOU.

SHE IS STILL HAPPY RIGHT NOW

BECAUSE SHE GETS TO LIVE
IN HER ADDICTION.

SHE GETS TO LIVE IN HER BLISS.

HI.

YEAH, I'D LIKE TO PLACE
AN ORDER FOR DELIVERY.

SHE HAS WHAT SHE WANTS.

SHE HAS ALL THE ATTENTION

FROM ALL THESE
WONDERFUL PEOPLE INVOLVED.

Paul: ALL RIGHT, I GOT SOME --
SOME PIZZA AFTER THIS LONG DAY.

YES.

BUT SHE HASN'T HAD TO GIVE UP
WHAT SHE LOVES YET.

ALL RIGHT.
YEAH, THAT'LL WORK. PERFECT.

COOL.
ALL RIGHT.

THANK YOU.
LOVE YOU, P. DOG.

**

SHE REALLY NEEDS
TO HUMBLE HERSELF

AND COME TO GRIPS WITH THIS FACT

THAT SHE IS THE ONE ATTACKING
AND KILLING HERSELF

AND IF SHE DOESN'T STOP

OR IF SHE DOESN'T
ACCEPT HELP TO STOP,

SHE'S JUST GOING TO DIE.

**

HELLO.
HELLO.

HI.
HOW Y'ALL DOING?

DOING GOOD.
HOW ARE YOU?

Diana: TODAY, I'M FINALLY
GOING TO SEE DR. NOWZARADAN.

AND I'M A LITTLE OVERWHELMED
RIGHT NOW.

OH.

I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO EXPECT.

AND THAT'S SCARY.

I'VE BEEN IN A PATTERN OF EATING
FOR A LONG TIME,

AND THAT PATTERN
HAS SERVED TO MEET MY NEEDS

IN A LOT OF WAYS.

AND NOW TO SAVE MY LIFE,
I HAVE TO CHANGE THAT.

AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT IT'S GONNA
TAKE FOR ME TO MAKE THAT HAPPEN.

**

AND THAT'S SCARY.

THAT'S REALLY SCARY.

DON'T PUT ME TOO LOW,
OR I WON'T BE ABLE TO GET OFF.

THIS IS WHERE
IT ALL BECOMES REAL.

BUT I DON'T EVEN KNOW
WHAT I WEIGH.

AND THAT'S SCARY TO FACE, TOO.

OKAY. TWO. ALL RIGHT.

OH. OKAY. LET GO.

OKAY.
EVERYBODY GO.

AND I HAVE NO IDEA
HOW HIGH THAT NUMBER'S GONNA BE.

OH, MY GOSH.

IT'S UNBELIEVABLE.

JUST UNBELIEVABLE.

OH, YEAH.

I'M SHOCKED RIGHT NOW.

ALL RIGHT.

I CAN'T BELIEVE HOW BAD
I'VE LET MYSELF GET.

OKAY.

THIS IS THE HIGHEST
I'VE WEIGHED BEFORE

AND HIGHER THAN I EVER THOUGHT
I WOULD WEIGH.

FOUR TO GO. OW.

IT'S HARD FOR ME TO BELIEVE
I'VE LET MYSELF DO THIS.

IT'S JUST...
OW.

...A BIT OVERWHELMING RIGHT NOW.

[ SIGHS ]

AT THIS POINT, YOU KNOW,
DR. NOWZARADAN

IS KIND OF
LIFE AND DEATH FOR ME.

YEAH.

YEAH.
THANKS, SWEETHEART.

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

HELLO.

HELLO.

HOW Y'ALL DOING?
DOING REALLY WELL.

ALL RIGHT,
SO I TALKED TO YOU

BEFORE YOU MADE THE TRIP
TO HOUSTON, HUH?

YES. IT WAS
A VERY DIFFICULT TRIP.

WE DROVE
FOR FIVE DAYS, SO...

YEAH.

FIVE DAYS TO GET DOWN
TO HOUSTON.

YES. MM-HMM.

IT WAS ROUGH.
ALL RIGHT.

SO TODAY,
YOU'RE 601 POUNDS.

YES.
ALL RIGHT.

SO WHAT IS
YOUR ABILITY NOW

TO BE ABLE
TO GET UP AND WALK?

I DON'T HAVE
A LOT OF DISTANCE IN WALKING,

BECAUSE MY KNEES
ARE SO BAD,

TO TRY AND PUT SOME
OF MY WEIGHT INTO THE WALKER.

AND SO
IN THE SPAN OF A DAY,

HOW MANY TIMES
DO YOU GET UP AND WALK?

WELL, EVERY TIME
I NEED TO USE THE BATHROOM.

SO FOUR OR FIVE.

SO YOU DON'T MOVE MUCH,
REALLY, HUH?

I HAVEN'T BEEN, NO.

WHO BRINGS YOU FOOD NOW?
MEGAN.

SO YOU GET
THE HIGH-CALORIE FOOD

AND YOU EAT.
RIGHT.

AND SO THAT WAS
THE KEY REASON

I'M GONNA BE MOVING
INTO MEGAN'S HOUSE

WITH SHE AND HER HUSBAND
BECAUSE IT'LL BE HELPFUL

THAT THERE'S SOMEBODY THERE

KIND OF FOR SUPPORT
AND ACCOUNTABILITY.

IF SHE'S BEEN
YOUR ENABLER,

WHY DO YOU THINK
LIVING WITH HER

IS GONNA CHANGE THAT?

THERE'S NO WAY TO SNEAK EAT
WHEN YOU'RE LIVING WITH PEOPLE.

Dr. Nowzaradan: DIANA CLEARLY
LIKES TO BE IN CONTROL,

AND THAT'S WHAT
I'M HEARING RIGHT NOW.

SHE HAS IDEAS AND PLANS

ON HOW SHE'S GOING TO FIX
HER SITUATION.

BUT THE REALITY IS THAT

SHE'S STILL GOING TO LEAVE
WITH HER ENABLERS,

AND SHE'S STILL GOING TO BE ABLE
TO MANIPULATE THEM.

SO THIS IS GOING TO BE
A DIFFICULT BEHAVIOR TO CHANGE.

OKAY, SO WHAT SHE EATS
WILL BE UP TO YOU.

YOU'RE IN CONTROL
RIGHT NOW.

SHE CANNOT BE
ANY LONGER.

YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND
AT YOUR AGE AND YOUR WEIGHT,

IT IS A MIRACLE
THAT YOU'RE ALIVE RIGHT NOW.

YOU'RE 55.

THE LIKELIHOOD
THAT YOU'RE GONNA MAKE IT TO 60

ARE NOT VERY GOOD,
OKAY?

DIANA HAS EATEN HERSELF
TO ALMOST BECOME NON-FUNCTIONAL.

SHE'S NOT TOO FAR AWAY
FROM BEING TOTALLY BEDRIDDEN,

AND IF IS BEDRIDDEN, I DON'T
THINK SHE'S GONNA MAKE IT.

SO, AT THIS POINT, YOU'RE NOT
A CANDIDATE FOR SURGERY,

BUT I WANT TO GO AHEAD
AND MAKE SOME CHANGES

AND EAT ONLY
A HIGH-PROTEIN DIET.

OKAY.
I WANT GONE THE CARBOHYDRATES,

AND STICK WITH
A 1,200-CALORIE DIET A DAY.

WOW. OKAY.

SO THE TYPE OF FOOD
THAT YOU NEED TO AVOID --

CANDY, COOKIES,
SWEETS, CHOCOLATE --

PEANUT-BUTTER CUPS.

PEANUT-BUTTER CUPS.
OKAY.

THAT WILL BE HARD.

ALL RIGHT.
MY EXPECTATION WILL BE

IN ONE MONTH, YOU SHOULD BE ABLE
TO LOSE AT LEAST 50 POUNDS.

WOW. OKAY.
[ CHUCKLES ]

ALL RIGHT.
YOU HAVE TO DO THIS NOW

BECAUSE YOUR BODY CANNOT
PHYSICALLY HANDLE

ANY SURGERY
AT THIS POINT.

SO IF SOMETHING
HAPPENS TO YOU,

THERE IS NOTHING WE CAN DO
TO SAVE YOU.

OKAY.

WELL, IT WAS NICE
TO MEET YOU.

OKAY.
THANK YOU.

Megan:
WE'LL SEE YOU IN A MONTH.

**

I'M CERTAINLY GONNA
GIVE IT A TRY,

BUT 1,200 CALORIES
A DAY?

WELL,
YOU CAN DO IT WITH --

I CAN EAT 1,200 CALORIES
FOR BREAKFAST, SO...

50 POUNDS WOULD BE AWESOME.
THAT WOULD BE REALLY NICE.

I CERTAINLY WANT
TO MAKE THAT GOAL.

Diana: RIGHT NOW,
I THINK MY HEAD IS SPINNING.

I TRUST HE KNOWS
WHAT HE'S SAYING,

BUT THAT DOESN'T SEEM
REALISTIC TO ME.

BEING ABLE TO LIVE WITH THE FACT

THAT I'M GONNA BE TEMPTED
TO NOT GIVE IN

IS REALLY
WHAT THE KEY IS FOR ME.

IT'S HARD FOR ME TO SAY
THAT I'M READY FOR THE JOURNEY,

BUT IT'S EITHER PUT IT ALL IN
TO GET THE WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY,

OR JUST GO AHEAD
AND GIVE UP NOW.

AND I'M NOT WILLING
TO GIVE UP NOW.

THIS IS GOING TO BE THE HARDEST
THING I'VE EVER DONE,

BUT I HAVE NO CHOICE.

I HAVE TO FIGURE IT OUT.

**

**

Diana: IT'S BEEN A FEW WEEKS
SINCE I MOVED TO HOUSTON

AND HAD MY FIRST
DOCTOR'S APPOINTMENT,

AND I'VE BEEN WORKING
TO STAY ON THIS DIET.

IT HASN'T BEEN EASY, THOUGH.

MEGAN HAS BEEN MAKING
ALL THE FOOD WE EAT,

SO I HAVEN'T BEEN ABLE TO EAT
ANY OF THE FOODS I WANT.

IT'S A BIG ADJUSTMENT,
BUT I KNOW I HAVE TO DO THIS.

THE WAY I WAS EATING IN SEATTLE
WAS REALLY TOXIC.

LOTS OF PIZZA,
LOTS OF MEXICAN FOOD,

LOTS OF DELIVERY.

SO RIGHT NOW, I'M TRYING
TO ADAPT HOW I VIEW FOOD.

I JUST NEED TO FIND A WAY
TO MAKE SURE

THAT I DON'T REESTABLISH
THE BAD HABITS

THAT I HAD ESTABLISHED
IN MY PAST.

WHAT'S FOR DINNER TONIGHT?

SALMON,
SQUASH, SALAD.

SOUNDS AWESOME.

PAUL,
CAN YOU COME HELP ME?

Megan: LIVING WITH DIANA
HAS BEEN DIFFICULT AT TIMES

BECAUSE I KNOW SHE WANTS CERTAIN
FOODS THAT ARE UNHEALTHY.

BUT I ESSENTIALLY
CONTROL DIANA'S DIET --

EVERYTHING THAT SHE EATS,
EVERYTHING SHE CONSUMES --

SO THERE'S
A LOT PRESSURE ON ME.

MY MOM IS HELPING
TO PAY FOR EVERYTHING

WHILE WE'RE DOWN HERE

SO MY HUSBAND, PAUL,
CAN WORK FROM HOME

AND WE CAN ALL FOCUS
ON HELPING DIANA.

BUT THE RESPONSIBILITY
OF THE FOOD FALLS ON ME.

MORE WATER,
PLEASE.

MORE WATER?
THANK YOU.

MM-HMM.

**

MMM.
VERY GOOD.

THE SALMON'S PERFECT.

Megan: THANK YOU.
ABSOLUTELY PERFECT.

WELL, I HOPE YOU'VE BEEN
LIKING MY COOKING.

YEAH.
I KNOW IT'S VERY DIFFERENT

FROM WHAT YOU WERE
EATING BEFORE.

IT'S A HUGE CHANGE
FROM HOW I WAS EATING,

AND I APPRECIATE THAT.

Diana: MY DIET FROM
WHEN I WAS IN SEATTLE TO NOW

IS NIGHT AND DAY,

FROM SUPER UNHEALTHY
TO VERY HEALTHY,

AND I'M JUST
SO PLEASED WITH THAT.

BEFORE I STARTED
THIS TRANSITION,

THIS PLATE WOULD'VE JUST BEEN
ABSOLUTELY HEAPING WITH FOOD.

AND WHEN I WAS FINISHED
WITH THIS PLATE,

THERE WOULD'VE BEEN A DESSERT,
OR MAYBE TWO, TO EAT AFTERWARDS.

ARE YOU DONE?
I AM.

TOTALLY?
THANK YOU. MM-HMM.

YEAH, VERY GOOD.

IN GENERAL,
SHE'S BEEN DOING VERY WELL.

SHE IS VERY MOTIVATED
AND VERY STEADFAST IN THE DIET.

SHE'S BEEN VERY GOOD
WITH STICKING TO IT.

BUT I KNOW
SHE'S ONLY EATING RIGHT

BECAUSE WE'RE MAKING HER.

SO I'M HOPING IF SHE'S JUST ABLE
TO GET THE SURGERY,

THEN THE CHANGES
WILL REALLY STICK.

**

Diana: I'M TIRED OF THIS LIFE
WHERE I CAN BARELY GET AROUND.

**

SO I'M WORKING HARD AT THIS.

I'M GONNA EAT WHAT
I'M SUPPOSED TO AND NOT COMPLAIN

BECAUSE I CAN'T SHOW UP
AT THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE

AND MISS THE GOAL.

BECAUSE MY FAMILY
BELIEVES IN ME...

AND THE LAST THING
I WANT TO DO IN THIS WORLD

RIGHT NOW IS DISAPPOINT THEM.

**

TODAY, I'M GONNA SEE
DR. NOWZARADAN AGAIN,

AND I'M HOPING
I LOST THE WEIGHT I NEEDED TO.

**

PAUL IS GOING TO HELP ME,

BUT MEGAN IS STAYING
WITH THE KIDS.

AND I'M HOPING
I GET TO COME BACK HOME

AND TELL THEM I DID IT,
THAT I MADE THEM PROUD.

**

SO I'M JUST HOPING I DON'T
LET EVERYONE I LOVE DOWN TODAY.

**

I FEEL LIKE I'VE DONE PERFECTLY
THIS LAST MONTH.

OKAY.

BUT WHEN YOU HAVEN'T LOST WEIGHT
IN YEARS,

YOU DOUBT THE SCALE
CAN EVER GO DOWN FOR YOU.

SO I JUST DON'T KNOW
WHAT IT'S GONNA SAY.

HEY!
OH, MY GOD.

HEY!
OH, MY GOD.

ALL RIGHT,
GET DOWN SAFELY.

OKAY.
HOLD ON.

[ GROANS ] OKAY.

OH, MY GOSH.
[ LAUGHS ]

I'M IN ABSOLUTE DISBELIEF.

IT'S NOT QUITE TO 50 POUNDS,
BUT I'M HOPING THAT IT'S ENOUGH

FOR THE DOCTOR TO SEE
THAT I'M READY.

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

HELLO.
HEY. HOW Y'ALL DOING?

DOING REALLY WELL.
GOOD.

ALL RIGHT,
SO YOU LOST LIKE 44 POUNDS.

I KNOW.
I'M ABSOLUTELY THRILLED.

DIFFICULT FOR YOU
TO LOSE THAT WEIGHT?

NO, I'VE JUST BEEN
STICKING TO THE PLAN

AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE.

SINCE WE'VE BEEN IN THE HOUSE,
IT'S BEEN EASIER

BECAUSE WE HAVE CONTROL
OF THE FOOD MORE.

OKAY, WELL, THAT IS
A POSITIVE CHANGE,

AND I'M PROUD OF YOU
FOR THAT.

BUT YOU STILL
SHOULD HAVE BEEN ABLE TO MAKE

A LITTLE BIT
MORE PROGRESS.

HOW'S YOUR LEVEL
OF ACTIVITY?

THAT NEEDS TO IMPROVE.
I TRIED WALKING.

WITH MY BONE-ON-BONE KNEE,
THAT WASN'T A GOOD IDEA.

HOW ABOUT DOING
UPPER-BODY EXERCISES?

YEAH, I'VE GOT SOME
LIGHT WEIGHTS THAT I CAN DO.

OKAY.

Dr. Nowzaradan:
DIANA HAS DONE WELL.

IT'S NOT 50 POUNDS,
BUT IT IS GOOD PROGRESS.

BUT SHE STILL TALKS LIKE
SHE'S IN CONTROL,

BUT THIS PROGRESS
IS MORE THE RESULT

OF HER ENABLER
CHANGING THEIR DYNAMIC.

AND THAT'S GOOD,
BUT SHE STILL DIDN'T MAKE

AS MUCH PROGRESS
THAT SHE SHOULD HAVE.

SO YOU'RE NOT APPROVED
FOR SURGERY AT THE MOMENT.

OKAY.
BUT I WANT YOU TO KEEP TRYING,

AND I WANT TO SET UP
A CALL WITH YOUR NIECE

TO GO OVER THE MEALS
SHE'S MAKING

TO SEE
WHAT YOU'RE EATING.

MM.

EVERY MONTH, YOU NEED
TO LOSE 40 POUNDS.

OKAY.

THIS IS GONNA BE
THE GOAL THAT WE'RE GONNA SET,

AND IF YOU STICK
WITH THE LOW-CALORIE,

HIGH-PROTEIN DIET,

YOU SHOULD EASILY BE ABLE
TO LOSE 40 POUNDS A MONTH.

OKAY.

OKAY, STICK WITH IT.
THANK YOU SO MUCH, DOCTOR.

ALL RIGHT,
WE'LL SEE YOU AROUND, OKAY?

OKAY,
SOUNDS GOOD.

DIANA AND HER FAMILY
STILL NEED TO KEEP WORKING

AT MAKING THESE CHANGES
TO MAKE SURE THEY UNDERSTAND

WHAT IT'S GOING TO TAKE
TO DO THIS FOR THE LONG TERM.

THIS IS NOT JUST
AN EXPERIMENT FOR A MONTH.

SO THEY NEED TO SHOW ME
THEY FULLY GET THIS.

Diana: I WAS KIND OF HOPING
TO GET SCHEDULED

FOR WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY,
AND THAT DIDN'T HAPPEN.

SO I FEEL LIKE I FAILED.

BUT I'M GONNA GO BACK
AND TELL MY FAMILY

THAT I STILL HAVE
SOME WORK TO DO.

I'M GOING TO DO THIS.

I HAVE ANOTHER MONTH

AND ANOTHER CHANCE
TO PROVE MYSELF.

**

MY FIRST APPOINTMENT
WITH DR. NOWZARADAN,

I LOST 44 POUNDS,
WHICH WAS AMAZING.

I WAS ABSOLUTELY THRILLED.

THEN HE SAID,

"GO LOSE ANOTHER 40 POUNDS
THIS MONTH."

THAT'S VERY INTIMIDATING.

AND ONE OF THE THINGS
THAT'S HAPPENED

AT THE BEGINNING OF THIS JOURNEY
IS I'VE BECOME

MORE AND MORE AWARE
OF HOW DISABLE I AM.

AND I THINK SOME DAYS
BECAUSE I'M NOT VERY MOBILE

AND I CAN'T EXERCISE VERY MUCH,

I FEEL LIKE 40 POUNDS
IS IMPOSSIBLE FOR ME.

SO WHAT I'M DOING THIS MONTH
IS I'M ADDING IN EXERCISE,

AND I'M NOT REALLY CAPABLE
OF DOING A WHOLE LOT.

BUT I FOUND A SEATED
EXERCISE VIDEO THAT I'M DOING,

SO THAT'S PROBABLY
ONE OF THE BIGGEST CHANGES

I HAVE GOING, IS MOVEMENT.

MEGAN ALSO TALKED TO DR. NOW,

AND WE ARE ON
A STRICTER DIET NOW.

SO EVERYTHING
IN THE REFRIGERATOR

IS VERY HEALTHY.

NON-FAT YOGURT, EGGS,
ICED TEA, BROCCOLI.

WE HAD PRODUCE COME YESTERDAY

FROM THE FARMERS MARKET
THEY DELIVERED,

SO I'M PRETTY MUCH SET.

THIS ISN'T THE FOOD I LIKE
OR WOULD TYPICALLY EAT,

BUT IT'S THE FOOD I NEED TO EAT.

SO I'VE LEARNED TO ADJUST
EVEN MORE THIS MONTH.

THE ONLY THING IN HERE
THAT'S NOT HEALTHY

IS THIS...ICE CREAM

THAT THEY GOT THE OTHER NIGHT.

[ SNIFFS ]

IT SMELLS REALLY GOOD.

IT SMELLS REALLY STRONG
OF VANILLA.

THIS MONTH HAS BEEN HARDER
THAN THE FIRST.

IT'S TAKEN A LOT MORE
WILL POWER TO KEEP GOING.

BUT I GO BACK TO THE DOCTOR
IN TWO WEEKS,

AND WHEN I DO, I WANT TO HIT
THE GOAL HE NEEDS

SO I CAN GET SURGERY.

AND I'M DETERMINED TO DO IT.

MY FAMILY CAN'T STAY HERE
WITH ME FOREVER,

SO I HAVE TO DO THIS.

AND EACH MONTH THAT GOES BY,
I HAVE LESS TIME.

SO I NEED TO HIT
THE GOAL THE DOCTOR WANTS

BY THE NEXT VISIT...

BECAUSE I DON'T KNOW
HOW MANY CHANCES

I'M GOING TO GET.

**

I'M SO NERVOUS RIGHT NOW.

Woman: DIANA BUNCH.
OH.

THE GOAL THE DOCTOR GAVE ME
FOR THIS MONTH

WAS TO LOSE 40 MORE POUNDS
AND GET UNDER 517.

AND I REALLY HOPE
I'VE DONE THIS.

ONE, TWO.

I'M NOT SURE IF EVERYONE CAN DO

ANOTHER MONTH LIKE THIS
IN HOUSTON.

SO I HAVE TO HIT THIS GOAL

BECAUSE THIS MAY BE
MY LAST CHANCE.

**

**

LET'S SEE.

Diana:
I'M REALLY HOPING I HIT MY GOAL.

DR. NOW SAID
I HAD TO LOSE 40 POUNDS

AND GET UNDER 517 POUNDS
THIS PAST MONTH.

AND I'M NERVOUS I'M NOT GONNA
HIT THE NUMBER I NEED AGAIN.

**

I DON'T KNOW
IF I HAVE MANY MORE CHANCES

IF I DIDN'T LOSE ENOUGH.

WOW.
THAT'S AWESOME.

THAT MEANS
I AM UNDER 500 POUNDS

FOR THE FIRST TIME
IN YEARS.

ABSOLUTELY YEARS.

THAT IS AMAZING.

I'M SO PROUD OF MYSELF
RIGHT NOW.

AND I HOPE DR. NOWZARADAN

THINKS IT'S ENOUGH
FOR WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY.

**

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

HI, DR. NOWZARADAN.

HELLO.
HOW Y'ALL DOING?

DOING WELL, THANK YOU.
HOW ARE YOU?

I'M DOING OKAY.

HOW YOU GETTING ALONG?
I'M GETTING ALONG PRETTY WELL.

HOW IS
YOUR DIET COMING ALONG?

VERY WELL.
I'M STAYING 100% TO IT.

SO, YOU'RE 494 POUNDS
NOW, HUH?

YEAH.
SO I'M ABSOLUTELY ECSTATIC.

ALL RIGHT, WELL, YOU'VE DONE
VERY WELL WITH YOUR WEIGHT LOSS,

AND THAT'S VERY GOOD.

BUT ARE YOU MAKING
THE FOOD CHANGES ON YOUR OWN,

OR ARE YOU STILL
ON THE CONTROLLED DIET

THAT YOUR FAMILY'S
GIVEN YOU?

UM...

YOUR FAMILY
WAS GOING TO HELP YOU

GET SURGERY
THEN GO BACK HOME.

MM-HMM.
HERE'S MY CONCERN.

YOU'RE ONLY LOSING WEIGHT

BECAUSE THEY'RE
FORCING YOU TO.

THE SECOND THEY LEAVE,
I'M NOT SURE

IF YOU WILL GO
OFF THE RAILS AGAIN.

DIANA AND HER FAMILY HAVE DONE
WELL THESE PAST COUPLE MONTHS,

BUT HER NIECE MEGAN HAS BEEN

IN ALMOST COMPLETE CONTROL
OF THE FOOD SHE EATS.

SO AT THIS POINT,
I HAVE NO EVIDENCE

THAT THESE CHANGES
WILL LAST PAST THE SURGERY,

AND IF THE FAMILY LEAVES,

DIANA MOST LIKELY WILL START
OVEREATING AGAIN INSTANTLY.

SO HER SITUATION NEEDS
TO REMAIN THE SAME

SO SHE CAN KEEP MAKING PROGRESS

UNTIL SHE STARTS
TO MAKE MORE PERMANENT CHANGES.

THIS IS THE STEP
I THINK WE ARE READY FOR.

YOU'RE MAKING PROGRESS
AS A FAMILY,

SO I WILL APPROVE YOU
FOR WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY,

BUT ONLY
IF YOUR FAMILY AGREES

TO STAY HERE IN HOUSTON
FOR A WHILE LONGER

UNTIL YOU START
DEALING WITH THE ISSUES

DRIVING YOU TO EAT
IN THERAPY AFTER SURGERY.

OKAY.
AND IF THEY DON'T,

I'M NOT GOING TO
FEEL COMFORTABLE MOVING AHEAD

WITH THE SURGERY, OKAY?
OKAY, YEAH, MAKES SENSE.

BUT IS THAT SOMETHING
EVERYONE CAN AGREE TO?

MM-HMM.

ALL RIGHT.

THEN I'M APPROVING YOU
FOR WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY.

YAY, THAT'S AWESOME.

SO Y'ALL
KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK,

AND I'LL SEE YOU SOON.

THANK YOU, DR. NOWZARADAN.
BYE-BYE.

ALL RIGHT,
NEXT STEPS.

I'M FEELING REALLY EXCITED

THAT I'M APPROVED
FOR WEIGHT-LOSS SURGERY,

SO THAT'S A BIG CELEBRATION
FOR ME.

ALL RIGHT,
YOU GO AHEAD AND GO OUT,

AND I'M GONNA BE
BEHIND YOU.

ALL RIGHT?
ALL RIGHT.

**

I'M JUST SO SICK
OF THIS [BLEEP]

I JUST WANT
TO GET THE KIDS OUT OF HERE

AND GET THIS [BLEEP]
OVER WITH.

DO I THINK SHE HAS
THE MOTIVATION TO IT ON HER OWN?

I HAVE
NO [BLEEP] IDEA.

SHE NEVER PROVED TO ME
SHE DID IT ON HER OWN.

SHE JUST PROVED
THAT SHE COULD DO IT WITH ME.

I'M FEEDING HER
900 CALORIES A DAY.

OF COURSE
SHE LOST WEIGHT.

WHAT AM I
SUPPOSED TO DO?

[ AMBULANCE BEEPING ]

**

I KNOW MY FAMILY HAS SACRIFICED
A LOT TO HELP ME GET HERE.

AND I'M SO THANKFUL
FOR ALL THEY'VE DONE.

I KNOW IT'S A LOT FOR THEM,
BUT THEY'RE SAVING MY LIFE.

**

I'M SO NERVOUS RIGHT NOW.

BUT I'M JUST GLAD
MY FAMILY IS HERE.

I LOVE YOU,
SWEETHEART.

OKAY?
I LOVE YOU ALL DAY,

EVERY DAY, NO MATTER WHAT
FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE.

I KNOW THIS IS A VERY HIGH-RISK,
VERY DANGEROUS SURGERY,

BUT THIS SURGERY IS THE ONLY WAY

I HAVE A CHANCE
AT THE LIFE I WANT.

SO NO MATTER HOW SCARED I AM,

THE RISK IS WORTH
WHAT I'M TRYING TO GAIN.

Dr. Nowzaradan:
TODAY, I'M GOING TO ATTEMPT
A GASTRIC BYPASS ON DIANA.

BUT SHE'S 56 NOW,
AND HER AGE COMBINED

WITH HER WEIGHT MAKES THIS
AN EXTREMELY HIGH-RISK SURGERY.

SO I'M GONNA HAVE TO MAKE SURE
EVERYTHING GO WELL WITH HER.

WE HAVE TO BE VERY CAREFUL

NOT TO PUSH HER BODY
BEYOND ITS LIMIT

BECAUSE A PERSON HER SIZE
CAN'T HANDLE VERY MUCH.

SO IF I ENCOUNTER ANY ISSUES
WITH HER OPERATION,

I MAY HAVE TO REDUCE THE SURGERY

OR END THE OPERATION ALTOGETHER
FOR SAFETY.

YOU CAN TURN
THE ROOM LIGHT OFF.

**

WAITING FOR DIANA,
HONESTLY, I'M WORRIED

BECAUSE AT HER WEIGHT,

HER CHANCES OF SURVIVAL
ARE LOWER.

I'M JUST HOPING THE SURGERY
WILL BE SUCCESSFUL

SO THAT SHE CAN BE SUCCESSFUL

FOR THE NEXT 20 YEARS
OF HER LIFE.

**

Dr. Nowzaradan:
WITH A GASTRIC-SLEEVE OPERATION,

WE REMOVE 70% TO 80%
OF THE STOMACH.

BUT SLEEVE GASTRECTOMY
WILL NOT ALTER THE INTESTINE,

SO A GASTRIC SLEEVE WON'T CHANGE
THEIR METABOLISM THAT MUCH.

BUT A GASTRIC-SLEEVE PATIENT
AFTER SURGERY WILL EAT LESS,

AND THEY LOSE WEIGHT.

SO IT IS NOT AS AGGRESSIVE,
BUT IT'S STILL EFFECTIVE.

ROOM LIGHT ON.

OKAY,
LET'S CLOSE HER UP.

ALL RIGHT,
ALL FINISHED.

ALL RIGHT,
DIANA'S SURGERY WENT VERY WELL.

Man: BIG, DEEP BREATHS, DIANA.
YOU'RE JUST WAKING UP.

EVEN THOUGH I WASN'T ABLE
TO GIVE HER A GASTRIC BYPASS,

THIS SLEEVE SURGERY
IS GOING TO HELP HER

TO STAY ON TRACK
WITH HER WEIGHT LOSS

AND LOSE BETWEEN 20 TO 30 POUNDS
A MONTH.

BUT NOW THE REAL WORK
IS GOING TO START WITH DIANA.

BEFORE SURGERY,
WE DEAL WITH THE MENTAL STATE

OF THE PATIENT
TO HANDLE THE CHANGES COMING.

BUT WE CANNOT ADDRESS
THE PATHOLOGY.

SO DIANA HAS TO BEGIN
THE PROCESS

OF DEALING WITH WHAT HAS BEEN
DRIVING HER TO EAT.

AS SOON AS SHE RECOVER
FROM SURGERY,

I'M GOING TO SEND HER TO THERAPY

TO START TO DEAL WITH
HER ISSUES.

AND DIANA'S FAMILY
ALSO WANTS TO GO BACK HOME

AS SOON AS POSSIBLE.

SO WE NEED TO ACT FAST

TO HELP HER DEAL WITH
HER EMOTIONAL ISSUES.

THE REAL HARD STUFF
STARTS NOW FOR DIANA.

**

OHH.

OHH.

OH.

Diana: IT'S BEEN A HARD FEW DAYS
RECOVERING FROM SURGERY,

AND I DON'T WANT TO DO ANYTHING.

OW, OKAY.

**

I JUST WANT TO STAY IN BED
AND REST RIGHT NOW.

BUT EVEN WHEN I GET UP,
I CAN'T DO MUCH.

I NEED TO BREATHE.

IT JUST FEELS LIKE I HAVE
THE WIND SUCKED OUT OF ME.

OHH!

ALL RIGHT.

SOMETHING'S MISSING.

IT'S LIKE YOU'VE LOST
YOUR BEST FRIEND,

AND I'M MOURNING
THE LOSS OF SOMETHING.

AND THEN I'M UPSET AT MYSELF
FOR FEELING THESE THINGS.

**

I THINK I'M A LITTLE DEPRESSED
RIGHT NOW,

AND I'M HOPING IT PASSES SOON.

BUT I JUST DON'T WANT TO EAT.

**

DO YOU NEED ANYTHING ELSE?
NO, I'M GOOD.

I'M JUST A LITTLE SCARED
ABOUT HOW IT'S GOING SO FAR.

**

[ GROANS ]

**

IT'S BEEN A MONTH
SINCE MY SURGERY,

AND IT'S STILL BEEN
REALLY TOUGH.

**

I WAS HOPING THAT ONCE
I GOT HOME, I'D START TO ADJUST

AND GET MY MOTIVATION BACK.

BUT THAT HASN'T REALLY HAPPENED.

**

BUT I KNOW
I'M STILL MAKING PROGRESS

BECAUSE I CAN FEEL
THE DIFFERENCE IN MY SIZE.

MY SHIRTS
ARE SUPER LOOSE AND BIG.

I'M REALLY HAPPY,

AND TO HAVE CLOTHES BE LOOSE ON
ME HASN'T HAPPENED FOR SO LONG.

IT'S JUST UNBELIEVABLE.

SO I'VE TRIED TO STAY POSITIVE

AND KEEP DOING
WHAT I'M SUPPOSED TO,

BUT I'M NOT GETTING UP
MUCH RIGHT NOW

AND I KNOW
I NEED TO CHANGE THAT.

GOOD MORNING.
Paul: GOOD MORNING.

Megan: MORNING.

WHAT ARE YOU GUYS
MAKING THIS MORNING?

REALLY?

Diana:
MEGAN AND THE GIRLS HAVE STARTED
TO LOOSEN UP THEIR DIET

AND EAT SOME THINGS THAT WOULD
NORMALLY BE VERY TEMPTING TO ME.

BUT I'M STILL ON SOFT FOODS,

SO I CAN'T REALLY OVEREAT
RIGHT NOW.

Megan: DO YOU WANT SPRINKLES
ON YOUR PANCAKES?

Girl: YES.
OKAY.

LET'S EAT
OUR YUMMY BREAKFAST.

**

I DO MISS REAL FOOD
AT THIS POINT, THOUGH.

AND I KNOW IT'S JUST
A MATTER OF TIME

BEFORE THE CRAVINGS COME BACK
AND I START TO STRUGGLE AGAIN.

SO THIS IS A LOT HARDER
THAN I THOUGHT.

**

BUT I'VE WORKED HARD
TO STAY ON TRACK WITH MY DIET.

AND IT'S THE FIRST TIME

I'M EXCITED
TO GET ON A SCALE EVER.

RIGHT NOW,
I'M HEADED TO SEE DR. NOW

FOR MY FIRST FOLLOW-UP
SINCE SURGERY.

OKAY, HOLD ON.

AND I'M GONNA TRY AND GO
BY REGULAR VEHICLE TODAY.

**

BUT THE LAST TIME
I GOT IN THE VAN,

I WASN'T ABLE TO GET OUT
WITHOUT PARAMEDICS TO HELP.

OKAY, NOW I NEED YOU
TO HELP ME GET MY FOOT IN.

OHH.

[ GRUNTS ]

OHH.
OKAY, I'M IN.

**

THIS IS AMAZING

BECAUSE THIS MEANS
I CAN FINALLY GO PLACES.

**

ALL MY PROGRESS -- IT OPENS UP
A WHOLE NEW WORLD FOR ME.

OH.

OKAY.

I LEFT THE HOSPITAL
AT 460 POUNDS.

AND THE DOCTOR SAID

I SHOULD LOSE 20 TO 30 POUNDS
A MONTH AFTER SURGERY.

**

SO I HOPE THAT I'M ON TRACK.

**

OH, AWESOME.

I'M HAPPY WITH THAT NUMBER.

**

I'M REALLY PROUD OF MYSELF,
AND I HOPE DR. NOW IS, TOO.

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

HI, DR. NOWZARADAN.
HELLO.

HOW Y'ALL DOING?
DOING REALLY GOOD, THANKS.

HOW ARE YOU?
ALL RIGHT.

SO, YOU ARE
AT 433 TODAY, HUH?

YES.

CAN YOU TELL
THE DIFFERENCE?

YEAH, I CAN,
AND I WANTED TO SHARE WITH YOU

I GOT HERE TODAY
NOT IN AN AMBULANCE,

BUT FOR THE FIRST TIME,
I RODE IN A VAN.

ALL RIGHT.
SO THAT WAS GREAT.

I'M REALLY,
REALLY HAPPY ABOUT THAT.

NOW YOU GOT TO FIT
IN A NORMAL CAR.

YES, EXACTLY.
THAT'S A BIG THING FOR ME.

THAT'S A BIG THING,
A GREAT IMPROVEMENT.

AND HOW'S YOUR DIET
COMING ALONG?

REAL GOOD.
I'M JUST ON STILL SOFT FOODS,

BUT DRINKING A LOT OF PROTEIN.
OKAY.

SO, YOU ARE PROGRESSING
PRETTY GOOD,

AND YOUR WEIGHT LOSS
IS ACCORDING TO EXPECTED.

NOW, HOW IS
YOUR ACTIVITY GOING ON?

I'VE HAD A LOT OF DIFFICULTY
WITH MY KNEE,

SO MY WALKING'S NOT AS GREAT,
BUT DEFINITELY CAN SEE

THE DIFFERENCE IN MY CLOTHES
AND EVERYTHING.

SO, YOUR WEIGHT LOSS
IS GOOD,

BUT LET ME
EXPLAIN SOMETHING.

YOU'RE GOING TO
HIT A WALL VERY SOON

AND START TO OVEREAT

UNLESS YOU START TO DEAL WITH
YOUR EMOTIONAL ISSUES.

SO YOU HAVE TO SEE
THE THERAPIST,

AND YOU NEED
TO DO THAT IMMEDIATELY.

OKAY, THAT SOUNDS GREAT.
ALL RIGHT.

DIANA HAS STAYED ON TRACK
THIS PAST MONTH,

WHICH IS GOOD.

BUT SHE'S NOT BEEN ACTIVE

AND IS USING HER KNEE PAIN
AS AN EXCUSE.

THE REALITY IS SHE'S STRUGGLING
WITH HER EMOTIONAL ISSUES.

IT'S ONLY
A MATTER OF TIME

BEFORE YOU START
TO GAIN AGAIN,

SO YOU NEED TO
TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY.

KEEP AT IT
AND CALL THE THERAPIST.

ALL RIGHT,
I'LL SEE YOU NEXT MONTH.

I'LL SEE YOU NEXT MONTH.
THANK YOU.

ALL RIGHT,
NICE TO SEE YOU AGAIN.

ALL RIGHT.

**

Megan: THAT'S EXACTLY
WHAT I EXPECTED --

THAT SHE WAS GONNA LOSE
THE MINIMUM AMOUNT OF WEIGHT.

BUT I REALLY THINK SHE HAS TO
JUST KEEP EXERCISING.

**

Diana: I'M NOT SURE HOW I FEEL
ABOUT SEEING A THERAPIST.

BUT IF THE DOCTOR THINKS
I NEED IT, I'M GONNA DO IT.

OH. OKAY.

CAN YOU HELP ME
WITH THIS FOOT, PAUL?

IT'S JUST NOT GOING TO BE
VERY PLEASANT,

AND I DON'T EVEN KNOW
WHERE TO BEGIN.

BUT I'LL TRY
AND SEE WHAT HAPPENS.

**

Diana: TODAY, I'M GOING TO
SEE A THERAPIST,

AND I KNOW THAT I HAVE A LOT
OF EMOTIONAL ISSUES TO DEAL WITH

IF I WANT TO CHANGE
MY EATING HABITS FOR GOOD.

BEFORE I LEFT SEATTLE,

I WAS JUST CAUGHT
IN A MAZE OF DEPRESSION,

AND THERE WASN'T
ANY MOVEMENT FORWARD.

BECAUSE IT'S NOT AN EASY PROCESS

TO TALK ABOUT DEEP THINGS
OR EMOTIONAL THINGS,

ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY'RE
THE VERY TOPICS

YOU SPENT A LIFETIME
TRYING TO AVOID.

DIANA?

YEAH, I'M DIANA.
SO NICE TO MEET YOU. I'M CASEY.

COME ON BACK.

SO I DON'T REALLY KNOW
WHERE TO BEGIN,

AND I'M A LITTLE SCARED
RIGHT NOW.

ALL RIGHT,
WELL, WELCOME.

SO, JUST SO I HAVE
A LITTLE BIT OF BACKGROUND,

TELL ME ABOUT
WHAT YOU THINK

CONTRIBUTED TO
GETTING TO THIS POINT.

YOU KNOW, I THINK
I WAS ALWAYS SENSITIVE.

MY CHILDHOOD
WAS CHAOTIC.

MY PARENTS WERE THERE,
BUT MY PARENTS HAD FIVE KIDS.

OH, MY,
SO THEIR HANDS WERE FULL.

THEIR HANDS WERE FULL.

I FELT LIKE THEY DID THEIR BEST
TO SUPPORT ME,

BUT THERE WAS NEVER
A GREAT SUPPORTIVE ATMOSPHERE.

AT TIMES, THAT WAS
A VERY LONELY THING.

IT MADE ME FEEL
REALLY INSECURE.

I DIDN'T FEEL LIKE
THERE WAS A SAFE HARBOR FOR ME.

NO SAFE PLACE FOR YOU?
NO.

SO WHAT HELPED YOU
AT THAT TIME --

'CAUSE YOU WERE SO YOUNG --
COPE WITH THAT?

THE MONEY THAT I HAD --
YOU KNOW,

I'D GET A LITTLE ALLOWANCE
EVERY WEEK --

WAS SPENT ON CANDY.
OH, OKAY.

NOW, THERE WASN'T
A HUGE AMOUNT OF MONEY,

SO I COULDN'T
GET FAT FROM IT,

BUT I DO REMEMBER THAT
THAT'S WHAT MY MONEY

WAS GONNA BE FOR.
OKAY.

WOW, SO YOU LEARNED
AT AN EARLY AGE

THAT FOOD
COULD SOOTHE YOU.

OH, ABSOLUTELY.

AND THEN WHEN I WAS
PROBABLY AROUND 12,

I WAS MOLESTED.
OKAY.

AND IT WAS A COUPLE
OF HIGH-SCHOOL BOYS.

OH, MY GOD.
AND, YOU KNOW,

I THINK I JUST STARTED FEELING
UNSAFE IN MY BODY.

AND I FELT BAD
ABOUT MYSELF.

I SHOULD HAVE BEEN SMARTER.

WHAT WAS I POSSIBLY DOING

THAT SENT OFF
THAT KIND OF SIGNAL?

SO YOU WERE
BLAMING YOURSELF.

YEAH, IT WAS HARD
NOT TO, YOU KNOW?

AT THE TIME, IT WAS CRUSHING.
OF COURSE.

IT CAN BE DEVASTATING.
MM-HMM.

SO, YEAH, THAT'S HARD.

THAT'S A HARD THING
TO THINK ABOUT.

[ SNIFFLES ]
IT'S VERY SAD.

YEAH.
IT'S VERY SAD.

IT IS.

THAT PROBABLY PLAYED
A BIGGER ROLE

THAN I'VE REALIZED
UNTIL JUST NOW,

THAT I PROTECTED MYSELF
BY GETTING UNATTRACTIVE.

MM-HMM.

AND IT REALLY DID
KEEP ME REALLY SAFE.

THE WEIGHT
DID KEEP YOU SAFE,

AND THAT'S WHAT
YOU WERE CRAVING.

YEAH.

NOW I WANT TO BE SAFE
WITHOUT HAVING TO BE UNHEALTHY.

WELL, I AM VERY IMPRESSED
BY YOUR INSIGHT

AND SELF-AWARENESS.

I WOULD SAY THAT A LOT OF THIS
HAS KIND OF DEVELOPED

IN THE LAST FEW MONTHS WHEN
I HAVEN'T BEEN EATING IT AWAY.

IT'S A WONDERFUL START,

JUST BEING IN TUNE
WITH YOUR BODY.

MM-HMM.

THE FACT THAT
YOU'RE RECONNECTING NOW

AND NOT AVOIDING

IS SOMETHING THAT YOU SHOULD
FEEL REALLY, REALLY PROUD OF.

[ SNIFFLES ]

[ SOBS, COUGHS ]

WHAT ARE YOU FEELING
RIGHT NOW?

I'M FEELING SAD
THAT I HAD TO CREATE...

THESE EXCUSES
BECAUSE I DIDN'T TRUST

THAT PEOPLE WOULD BE THERE
FOR ME IN A HEALTHY WAY.

AND SO, I CREATED
THIS BIG PROBLEM,

THIS BIG OBSTACLE THAT,

YOU KNOW,
WAS SUPPOSED TO KEEP ME SAFE,

BUT IT WAS ACTUALLY
KILLING ME, YOU KNOW?

AND I'M NOT QUITE SURE
HOW TO BREAK THAT PATTERN.

OKAY.

WHEN I WOULD HAVE
THESE FEELINGS OF ANXIETY,

I WOULD EAT THEM AWAY,
AND THEY WENT AWAY.

WELL,
NOW I HAVE TO FEEL THEM.

IT'S OKAY
TO FEEL ANXIOUS.

SOMETIMES IT'S A VERY...

APPROPRIATE RESPONSE
TO WHAT'S GOING ON.

LIKE, YOU SHOULD FEEL ANXIOUS
ABOUT CERTAIN THINGS.

UH-HUH.
BUT I LOVE THE IDEA

OF GETTING OUT OF YOUR HEAD,
FOCUSING ON SOMETHING ELSE.

IT CAN EVEN BE
AS SIMPLE AS JOURNALING.

AND THEN
I WOULD LOVE FOR YOU

TO TRY TO FOCUS
A LITTLE MORE

ON BEING
IN THE PRESENT MOMENT.

YEAH.

WE ONLY HAVE CONTROL OVER

WHAT WE'RE DOING RIGHT HERE
IN THIS MOMENT.

YEAH.
AND YOU'LL BE OKAY.

YEAH, AND THAT'S
ABSOLUTELY TRUE, YEAH.

I HAVE THE HIGHEST
OF HOPES FOR YOU.

I REALLY DO.
APPRECIATE THAT.

I THINK YOU ARE SET UP
FOR SOME REALLY GOOD SUCCESS,

AND I WISH YOU THE BEST OF LUCK
MOVING FORWARD.

THANK YOU SO MUCH.
OH, YOU'RE SO WELCOME.

OHH.

IT WAS REALLY NICE
TO TALK ABOUT SOME THINGS,

BUT IT BROUGHT A LOT EMOTION
UP TO THE SURFACE.

SO RIGHT NOW, I'M FEELING
A LITTLE OVERWHELMED.

[ SCOFFS ]

OH, SORRY.

IT'S A LOT TO PROCESS.

**

BUT I'M GONNA SPEND SOME TIME

THINKING ABOUT
WHAT WE TALKED ABOUT TODAY.

**

AND OVERALL,
I THINK IT ALL WENT WELL.

**

THE PAST COUPLE OF WEEKS

SINCE SEEING THE THERAPIST
HAVE BEEN GOOD.

I WANT TO WORK THROUGH
MY EMOTIONS,

AND I KNOW I'M GONNA
HAVE TO DO THAT SOON...

THAT'S A GOOD PLACE FOR IT.
YEAH. THANKS.

...BECAUSE MEGAN SAID SHE WANTED

TO SIT DOWN
AND TALK WITH ME TODAY.

AND I KNOW IT'S TO TELL ME

IT'S ALMOST TIME FOR THEM
TO GO BACK TO WASHINGTON.

BUT I KNEW THIS DAY WOULD COME,
AND I HAVE TO GET READY FOR IT.

YOU KNOW, PAUL AND I
HAVE BEEN TALKING ABOUT

MOVING BACK HOME
IN A FEW MONTHS,

SO I WANT TO MAKE SURE
THAT YOU'RE READY,

REALLY READY TO BE
BACK OUT ON YOUR OWN.

I ALWAYS KNEW
YOU WERE GONNA GO BACK,

AND THAT
MAKES ABSOLUTE SENSE.

THESE MONTHS
OF HAVING YOU GUYS' SUPPORT

HAS BEEN CRITICAL
TO MY WEIGHT LOSS,

BUT I FEEL REALLY COMMITTED
TO THIS PROGRAM.

I FEEL REALLY COMMITTED
TO THE WAY THAT I EAT.

AND I CERTAINLY
SUPPORT YOU DOING THAT,

AND I'LL START
LOOKING FOR AN APARTMENT

IN THE NEXT
LITTLE WHILE HERE.

I MEAN,
IN THE NEXT FEW MONTHS.

YEAH, YEAH, I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND
THAT YOU WANT TO GO BACK HOME.

YEAH, WELL...
YEAH.

'CAUSE WE DON'T
HAVE ROOTS HERE.

BUT WE DON'T WANT TO LEAVE,
PUT YOU IN A POSITION

WHERE EITHER
YOU DON'T FEEL LIKE YOU'RE READY

OR WE DIDN'T
PROVIDE ENOUGH SUPPORT.

I FEEL VERY COMFORTABLE
MAINTAINING THE CORRECT FOOD,

THE RIGHT PORTIONS.
I COULD NOT HAVE DONE THIS

WITHOUT YOUR SUPPORT
BECAUSE ON MY OWN,

I WASN'T HAVING
ANY HEADWAY WITH THAT,

SO REALLY GRATEFUL.
NO PROBLEM.

I COULD NOT BREAK THE HABITS
IN THE SAME ENVIRONMENT

THAT I DEVELOPED
THE HABITS.

AND I NEEDED
THE ACCOUNTABILITY.

IF I ORDERED A PIZZA,
YOU WERE CERTAINLY GONNA KNOW.

I THINK I HAD TO HAVE THAT BREAK
AND THAT SAFE ENVIRONMENT

IN ORDER TO DO THAT.

EVERY SINGLE MILESTONE,

YOU'VE EITHER ACHIEVED
OR BEATEN,

AND THAT'S AWESOME.
THANK YOU.

AND I COULDN'T HAVE
DONE IT WITHOUT YOU.

SERIOUSLY COULD NOT HAVE
DONE IT WITHOUT YOU.

I KNOW.
SO I'M GRATEFUL FOR THAT.

I KNOW IT'S TIME
FOR THEM TO LEAVE,

BUT I'M REALLY SCARED

BECAUSE FOR THE FIRST TIME
THROUGH THIS WHOLE PROCESS,

I'M GOING TO BE ON MY OWN.

AND I KNOW THAT THAT'S GOING TO
BE THE REAL TEST FOR ME.

AND I JUST REALLY HOPE
I'M READY FOR IT.

**

Diana: I'M ABOUT READY
TO GO OUT.

IF YOU WOULDN'T MIND
JUST MOVING THAT ONE RUG

AND THEN OPENING THE DOOR
FOR ME -- EITHER ONE.

OH, SURE.
THANKS.

Diana: IT'S BEEN
A HARD COUPLE OF MONTHS.

I'VE WORKED HARD
TO STAY ON TRACK WITH MY DIET,

AND I'VE BEEN GETTING UP

AND TRYING TO EXERCISE
WHEN I CAN.

BUT THIS IS THE FIRST TIME
I'VE WALKED OUTSIDE

WITH JUST MY WALKER AND MYSELF,
SO I'M JUST TAKING IT SLOW.

IT FEELS HOPEFUL,
SO THIS IS JUST A START.

AND I CAN GO JUST A LITTLE BIT
FURTHER EVERY TIME,

JUST A LITTLE BIT FURTHER.

HEY, ADDY.

HEY, LOVE YOU.

I'VE BEEN DREADING THE FACT
THAT MEGAN AND HER FAMILY

ARE GOING BACK
TO WASHINGTON SOON.

IN FACT, THEY'RE LEAVING
IN A FEW DAYS,

AND I CAN'T BELIEVE IT.

SO THIS IS MY FIRST
REAL CHALLENGE TO PROVE MYSELF.

I'VE HAD SOMEONE
LIKE MEGAN OR DR. NOW

TO HOLD MY HAND
UP TO THIS POINT.

**

NOW FOR THE FIRST TIME
SINCE STARTING, I'M ON MY OWN.

IT'S ALWAYS FUN
TO BE OUTSIDE WITH YOU.

Megan:
I'M REALLY PROUD OF DIANA.

KNOWING SHE'S MAKING
SO MUCH PROGRESS

AND DOING SO WELL
IS SUCH A HUGE RELIEF.

**

BUT PAUL AND THE GIRLS AND I
JUST HAVE TO GO HOME.

WE'VE BEEN HERE FOR DIANA
BECAUSE WE LOVE HER

AND WE WANTED HER
TO GET THIS CHANCE.

AND NOW THAT SHE'S DOING WELL,

WE NEED TO PLAN
TO GO BACK HOME TO SEATTLE.

AND I HAVE NO DOUBT
THAT DIANA'S GOTTEN TO A PLACE

WHERE SHE CAN DO THIS
ON HER OWN.

HERE THEY COME.

IN FIRST PLACE
IN THE 2-YEAR-OLD DIVISION

IS THE ONE AND ONLY ANYA.

YAY, YOU'RE THE WINNER.

I LOVE MY FAMILY, AND THEY'VE
SACRIFICED SO MUCH FOR ME.

SO I'M NOT GOING TO
LET THEM DOWN.

THIS IS MY MOMENT
TO SHOW EVERYONE,

INCLUDING MYSELF, I CAN DO THIS.

**

TODAY, I'M GONNA DO SOMETHING

THAT I HAVEN'T DONE
IN OVER A DECADE.

I'M GONNA GO TO A GYM.

ONE ACCOMPLISHMENT
ALREADY TODAY --

THIS IS THE FIRST TIME
I'VE BEEN ABLE

TO HAVE A SEATBELT ON
WITHOUT AN EXTENDER.

THAT'S JUST ONE OF THOSE
LITTLE VICTORIES.

IT'S SMALL, BUT IT'S BIG TO ME.

**

I DEFINITELY HAVE
SOME APPREHENSION

ABOUT GOING TO THE GYM.

I'M AFRAID
PEOPLE WILL LAUGH AT ME.

BUT GETTING MY HEALTH BACK
IS SO IMPORTANT THAT

I'M WILLING TO DO IT.

HOW ARE YOU?
I'M GOOD.

HOW ARE YOU DOING?
I'M DOING GOOD.

LET'S JUST START OUT
WITH A LITTLE WARM-UP.

OKAY.

THIS IS GONNA BE YOUR SUPPORT
SYSTEM HERE, NOT THE WALKER.

JUST FIVE KNEE BENDS.
OKAY.

OKAY?
YOU GOT IT?

GOT IT.
ALL RIGHT.

SHOW ME WHAT YOU GOT.
ALL RIGHT.

THIS ISN'T GOING TO BE EASY,
BUT I KNOW I CAN DO THIS.

VERY NICE.

I'M ALREADY WALKING
AROUND THE NEIGHBORHOOD

AND STAYING AS ACTIVE AS I CAN.

I'M JUST GONNA DO THIS,
ALL RIGHT.

LOVE THE LOOK
ON YOUR FACE.

[ CHUCKLES ]

SO I FIGURE THE GYM
IS THE NATURAL NEXT STEP

TO PUSH MYSELF TO DO MORE.

SO YOU GOT TO
COME AROUND THIS WAY.

**

MY HOPE IS THAT
THIS TIME NEXT YEAR,

I WON'T EVEN NEED MY WALKER.

OH.

OKAY.

LOOKING GOOD.

I'M PROUD OF HOW FAR
I'M PUSHING MYSELF.

I NEVER THOUGHT
I'D MAKE IT THIS FAR.

THERE YOU GO.

DIANA REALLY SURPRISED ME.

I COULD TELL IT WAS HARD,
BUT ONCE SHE EASED INTO IT,

SHE EXCELLED.

Diana:
I FEEL GOOD, AND I'M HOPING

I CAN MAKE THIS
A NORMAL PART OF MY ROUTINE.

ONE OF THE THINGS THAT MADE ME
REALLY HAPPY TODAY

WAS I WAS ABLE TO NOT ONLY DO
WHAT GOZI ASKED ME,

BUT TO JUST GO
A LITTLE BIT FURTHER.

AND I FELT
A LITTLE BIT UNCOMFORTABLE

THAT NOT WHAT I HAD
BUILT IT UP TO BE.

I'M FEELING REALLY GOOD.
I FEEL VERY INDEPENDENT

BEING ABLE TO GO OUT
AND DO THIS ON MY OWN.

I'M FEELING TIRED, AND I'M GONNA
GO HOME AND HAVE A REST.

**

THIS PAST MONTH, I'VE BEEN
REALLY WORKING ON DOING A LOT

OF WHAT THE THERAPIST SUGGESTED
TO HELP DEAL WITH MY EMOTIONS.

I REALIZE THAT A LOT OF
THE REASON THAT I USE FOOD

IS BECAUSE I DON'T DEAL WITH
THE WAY I'M FEELING,

AND DEALING WITH HOW I'M FEELING
IS CRITICAL FOR MY HEALING.

I STARTED JOURNALING, AND I DO
FEEL LIKE IT'S HELPED A LOT.

RIGHT NOW, WHAT I'M WRITING
ABOUT ARE MY FEELINGS

AND FEARS ABOUT BEING ALONE.

MEGAN AND PAUL
HAVE HEADED BACK TO SEATTLE,

BUT THEY WILL BE BACK DOWN
IN A COUPLE OF MONTHS

TO GO BACK TO THE DOCTOR WITH ME
AND FIND OUT IF I'VE LOST WEIGHT

WHILE I WAS ON MY OWN
OR IF I'VE STARTED TO GAIN.

BEING ALONE RIGHT NOW,
IT'S SCARY,

BECAUSE WHAT IF
I CAN'T DO THIS ON MY OWN

AND I'M GONNA LET EVERYONE DOWN?

NORMALLY, I BOTTLE IT UP

AND THEN USE FOOD
TO DEAL WITH THAT EMOTION.

BUT I'M TRYING TO ADDRESS IT
AND NOT RUN FROM IT.

BUT NO MATTER HOW LONELY
OR HOW HARD IT GETS,

I HAVE TO STAY STRONG.

IF I DON'T, I COULD LOSE IT ALL.

**

Diana: IT'S BEEN GETTING HARDER
AND HARDER

TO RESIST THE TEMPTATION
TO EAT SOMETHING I SHOULDN'T.

**

BUT I HAVEN'T BEEN GIVING IN.

IT'S THE LONELINESS
THAT DOES IT RIGHT NOW.

**

IT'S HARD, SO I'VE DEVELOPED
A FOOD PLAN TO KEEP ME ON TRACK.

MEGAN IS COMING
IN A COUPLE WEEKS

TO TAKE ME TO THE DOCTOR

AND SEE IF I'M LOSING
OR GAINING,

AND I WANT TO MAKE HER PROUD
WHEN I GET BACK ON THE SCALE.

EVERY DAY,
I BECOME MORE AND MORE AWARE

OF HOW FOCUSED I NEED TO BE

BECAUSE ONE WRONG DECISION
COULD BE THE FIRST STEP

IN A DIRECTION THAT LEADS ME
RIGHT BACK TO BEING 600 POUNDS.

**

SO, NO MATTER HOW HARD IT GETS,
I'M NOT GIVING IN.

**

I'M HEADED FOR MY NEXT DOCTOR'S
APPOINTMENT WITH DR. NOW.

IT'S BEEN A FEW MONTHS
SINCE MY LAST APPOINTMENT...

OKAY.

...AND I SHOULD BE BELOW 400
AND INTO THE 300s.

DIANA BUNCH?

I'VE DONE EVERYTHING RIGHT,
I'VE STAYED ON MY PLAN,

BUT I'M STILL NERVOUS.

I JUST DON'T KNOW
WHAT THE SCALE IS GONNA SAY.

I WANT TO MAKE MEGAN PROUD
AND TO SHOW HER

AND THE DOCTOR
I CAN DO THIS ON MY OWN,

SO I HOPE IT'S A GOOD NUMBER.

YAY!
THAT'S FANTASTIC.

IT JUST SHOWS THAT
MY HARD WORK'S PAYING OFF,

AND IT MAKES EVERYTHING
SO WORTH IT.

[ KNOCK ON DOOR ]

ALL RIGHT, SO,
TODAY YOU ARE DOWN TO 359.

YES.
AND YOU'RE DOING GREAT.

I'M REALLY PROUD OF YOU.
THANK YOU SO MUCH.

SO, HOW DO YOU FEEL NOW?

I'M FEELING A WHOLE LOT
BETTER, YOU KNOW?

I CAN DO MORE,
I CAN GET AROUND EASIER --

JUST OPEN UP
THE WHOLE WORLD FOR ME.

Dr. Nowzaradan:
DIANA IS DOING VERY WELL.

SHE'S MADE THE PROGRESS
SHE SHOULD,

AND SHE'S STAYED ON THE DIET
THE WHOLE TIME.

HER DYNAMIC WITH
HER WHOLE FAMILY

HAS NOT ONLY CHANGED,
BUT SHE HAS MADE THE TRANSITION

TO MAKING RIGHT CHOICES
FOR HERSELF.

SO, YOU'RE
GOING TO BE READY

FOR YOUR FIRST
SKIN SURGERY VERY SOON.

AT THIS TIME NEXT YEAR,
YOU COULD BE AT YOUR TARGET.

THAT'S FANTASTIC, AND AGAIN,
I JUST SO APPRECIATE YOU

AND ALL YOUR ENCOURAGEMENT
ALONG THE WAY.

ALL RIGHT.
THANK YOU SO MUCH.

ALL RIGHT, NICE TO SEE YOU.
I APPRECIATE IT.

THANK YOU VERY MUCH.
NICE TO SEE YOU.

I'LL SEE Y'ALL LATER.
BYE-BYE.

Megan:
I'M REALLY PROUD OF DIANA.

IT WAS HARD TO HAVE TO GO BACK
AND LEAVE HER,

BUT I HAD NO DOUBT
SHE COULD DO THIS ON HER OWN.

I LOVE DIANA,
AND MY WHOLE FAMILY --

YOU KNOW,
WE CAN'T IMAGINE LOSING HER.

SO, KNOWING THAT SHE'S MAKING
SO MUCH PROGRESS

IS SUCH A HUGE RELIEF.

Diana:
I HAD NO IDEA

HOW HARD THIS JOURNEY
WAS GONNA BE OVER THE LAST YEAR.

BUT I KNOW
EACH STRUGGLE IS WORTH IT

WHEN I COME OUT THE OTHER SIDE.

SO, I'M EXCITED
ABOUT THE FUTURE,

AND I CAN'T WAIT TO SEE
WHAT THE NEXT YEAR HOLDS.

**

MEGAN AND PAUL MOVED THE REST
OF THEIR STUFF BACK TO SEATTLE,

AND THE LEASE IS UP HERE SOON.

SO, MY LITTLE SISTER
HAS FLOWN DOWN TO HOUSTON

TO HELP ME APARTMENT SHOP
RIGHT NOW.

**

HI, I'M DIANA.
NICE TO MEET YOU.

NICE TO MEET YOU.
WELCOME.

LET ME TAKE YOU
TO THE APARTMENT.

THIS IS A ONE-BEDROOM,
ONE-BATH

WITH A LIVING ROOM
AND A DINING ROOM.

WOW, THIS IS REALLY NICE.
THANK YOU.

YEAH, I LIKE
THE HARDWOOD FLOORS.

ME, TOO.
I WAS ABOUT TO SAY THAT.

I REALLY LIKE
THE HARDWOOD FLOORS, SO...

I'M GONNA STAY HERE IN TEXAS
FOR ANOTHER YEAR.

AND ONCE I GET
MY FINAL SKIN SURGERIES

AND HIT MY TARGET,
THEN I'M MOVING BACK TO SEATTLE.

GREAT.
THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

THANK YOU.
WE'LL SPEAK SOON.

HAVE A NICE DAY.

Diana: I'VE COME SO FAR
IN SUCH A SHORT TIME.

I'VE LEARNED SO MUCH
ABOUT MYSELF,

AND I'M CONTINUING
TO LEARN EVEN MORE

AS I MEET WITH MY THERAPIST.

AND I CAN ALREADY
SEE THE CHANGES IN ME

THAT ARE RESULTING FROM THAT.

AND THAT MAKES ME
WANT TO KEEP GOING.

**

I'VE STARTED TO DO SOMETHING

I'VE WANTED TO DO
FOR A WHILE NOW.

SO, I'M VOLUNTEERING
AT A CRISIS CENTER,

AND I'M CURRENTLY IN TRAINING
TO BE A CRISIS COUNSELOR.

BEING TAKEN ADVANTAGE OF
AND HURT LIKE I WAS

WHEN I WAS YOUNGER
MADE ME FEEL SO SCARED AND LOST.

AND I DON'T WANT ANYONE
TO BE IN THE POSITION

THAT I WAS IN, WHERE THEY JUST
FELT ALONE AND UNLOVED.

AND IF I CAN PREVENT
JUST ONE OTHER CHILD

FROM FEELING THE SAME WAY,
THEN I'LL FEEL LIKE

I'M ABLE TO START
TO GIVE BACK IN SOME SMALL WAY.

SO, I'M REALLY EXCITED RIGHT NOW
TO HAVE FOUND THIS OPPORTUNITY

AND TO BE DOING THIS.

IT'S SOMETHING I NEVER WOULD'VE
DREAMED I COULD EVER DO.

WHEN YOU SPEND SO MUCH
OF YOUR LIFE TRAPPED SOMEWHERE

THAT IS YOUR WHOLE WORLD,
YOU HAVE A LOT OF TIME TO DREAM.

COME ON GUYS,
I BROUGHT YOU LUNCH.

AND SOME OF THOSE DREAMS

ARE LITTLE THINGS THAT
OTHER PEOPLE TAKE FOR GRANTED,

LIKE JUST GOING TO A PARK
AND FEEDING FISH.

I WOULDN'T HAVE EVEN DARED DREAM

I COULD DO SOMETHING LIKE THIS
A YEAR AGO.

BUT NOW I CAN GO OUT BY MYSELF
AND DO THINGS ON MY OWN.

IT'S JUST AN INCREDIBLE FEELING.

IT'S KIND OF LIKE LIFE.

WE CAN STAY IN THE MURKY WATER
AND LOSE HOPE,

OR WE CAN JUST COME UP
TOWARDS THE SUNSHINE.

I WANT TO BE IN THE LIGHT,

AND THAT'S WHAT
I'VE DEDICATED MY LIFE TO NOW --

LIVING IN THE LIGHT AND
MAKING SURE I HELP OTHERS

LIVE IN IT AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE
BECAUSE NOW EVERY DAY IS A GIFT

AND NOTHING IS GONNA TAKE ME
OFF TRACK AGAIN.

I'M DONE WITH THAT KIND OF LIFE,

AND I'M DEDICATED
TO GETTING TO MY GOAL

AND BECOMING THE PERSON
I KNOW I CAN BE AGAIN.