Original subtitles

You missed your deadline again.

- You will have it in an hour. - 90 minutes, tops.

[crying] Drew, you're not gonna believe...

- No, you're out of excuses. - No, Drew, I...

Whatever you have, just send it now.

Let's talk about why we spend

all this time putting crap on our eyelids.

What's going on with Leigh?

She's been bailing on her classes.

She just stays in her room. She hasn't showered.

- Stop making my bed. - This is so inappropriate.

If that's what it's gonna take to get you

out of this room, then fine... that's what's happening.

You took me to a suicide walk?

One mile.

I don't know if I can keep walking anymore.

- We've gone one more mile. - I know.

- We're so close. - I'll carry you, come on.

- I got him! - Oh!

[laughs]

What are we gonna do the next time I hang out?

I don't think us hanging out is a good idea.

Why can't you just be my friend?

Leigh, I think I'm in love with you.

[phone clicking]

[sighs] [phone whooshes]

[bottle spraying]

[sighs]

[soft music]

"Great for work, weekend brunch, date night,

"or for those days when a hole in the universe opens up

where your husband used to be."

I mean, I can't believe that you published this.

I thought you sent me your review

because you wanted me to publish it.

- That's not a review. - That's a breakdown.

Yeah.

Yeah, and now it's a public breakdown.

Okay, that's one way of looking at it.

Here's another... you wrote something really good,

and people are responding to it

Great, so now there's a bunch of strangers out there

who feel sorry for me.

I mean, this is, like, my actual nightmare.

- No, no, no, no. - No one feels sorry for you.

They feel...

[sighs]

You should read the comments. See for yourself.

I thought you weren't supposed to read the comments

on the Internet.

- These comments are different. - You should read them.

When you feel up to it.

If you feel...

H-how are you feeling?

- I don't know. - Um...

I'm not crying on the floor of a bathroom,

but I don't know where I am now.

I was really worried about you, Leigh.

If it gets bad like that again, you have to let me know.

I will get down on that bathroom floor with you.

- I don't care about diseases. - [chuckles]

I never want you to feel alone like that.

Yeah, I was in a pretty bad place.

And I thought I was gonna be stuck there

and that nothing was gonna help.

But it was... actually, it was... it was Danny who...

Danny, he came over, and, um... we went for a walk,

and things started to feel a little bit better after that.

You and Danny are hanging out again?

No, no, no, it was just, like... it was that one time.

Like you and I are hanging out right now.

- Yeah, we are. - Yep.

[laughter]

[light switches clicking]

[sighs]

[soft music]

[phone clicking, whooshes]

[cell phone chiming]

[music continues]

[door opens, closes]

[knock at door]

- What... what's going on? - Your card was declined.

- That's weird. - I just paid it off.

- Well, I handled it. - Lucky I got paid yesterday.

Didn't plan to cover my own bachelor party.

- Although maybe I should have. - That's a bank error, dude.

You could have just called...

You weren't there to deal with it.

That's a you error.

God, you're so predictable.

I mean, a girl looks in your direction, and you bail?

You need to keep it down.

She's in the bedroom, and I didn't bail.

The party was over.

There was a guy literally asleep on the bar.

You had one job tonight.

Matt, I had 12 jobs tonight, and they all sucked balls.

You know hard it was to get your boring-ass friends to that bar?

Like, what wild plans did Chris have

that he couldn't commit until yesterday?

And then I had to hang with those assholes for ten hours.

If I had stayed any longer,

I would have straight-up murdered one of those dudes...

probably Chris.

You know, I was, uh...

I was planning on capping the night off in Glendora...

uh, that place you buy strawberry doughnuts

at 4:00 a.m.

- Wow. - But instead I'm here

at 4:00 a.m., listening to all your excuses.

Matt, what are you talking about?

Glendora?

Strawbe... seriously?

You can't be mad at me about a last-minute plan

you made in your head and you never told me about.

I shouldn't have to tell you about it.

It wasn't about you.

- You should have just been there. - [sighs]

[bottle opens] How's surfing?

- Huh? - I said, "How's surfing?"

Have you made any friends out there yet?

No, it's pretty quiet.

Will you go put the food on the table for me, please?

Sure.

Do you have any napkins?

Let's see.

God, are you so selfish you can't handle one night

being about anyone else?

[sighs]

I don't know, man. I guess I hit a wall.

You know, planning your bachelor party's been weird.

It's the end of an era.

Wow, you're still making it about you.

It was my bachelor party.

And for the rest of my life, whenever I think about it,

all I'm gonna remember is this.

You know what?

Never mind.

You're right.

I'm sorry, okay?

I'm sorry.

Are... are you okay?

I'm fine.

[exhales deeply]

- How... how's Leigh? - I don't know.

You two aren't talking?

Why are you asking me so many questions, Mommy?

Because I care about you.

Danny, I know you're not doing well.

Matt...

Does everything in my life have to be about Matt?

No, Danny.

Sweetie, I'm just trying to talk to you.

I've been here over an hour,

and you haven't asked me a single question.

Do you even care about your mother?

Do you care about me?

I can ask you some questions, Mama.

Good.

- How's work? - Ah.

Tony... he's having another affair.

[laughs]

Tony, isn't that... that's wife three.

- Four. Count it, four. - Ugh.

[laughs]

Damn.

That dude needs to get it together.

- Sure does. - [chuckles]

[soft rock music]

[indistinct chatter]

- Oh, sorry. - I'm so sorry.

Are you okay? Okay.

She's okay. [chuckles]

- She's okay. - That's good to know.

What were you listening to?

- Spiritualized. - Ever heard of it?

- Yeah. - No, I haven't.

I don't know why I just said yes.

[laughter]

I like your hoodie.

The patch... good old John of the Mountains.

- You know John Muir? - Mm-hmm.

Oh, well, I'm kind of like a national parks nerd.

I've hiked Zion, camped in Rocky Mountain.

[laughs] Don't even get me started.

No, you can get started.

- You sure? - Yeah.

All right, that's, like, five hours of your life

- you're never getting back. - [chuckles]

It's just... it's nice to meet a fellow parks nerd.

Actually, I've only been to Joshua Tree and Yosemite.

I think I need one more to be able to call myself a nerd.

[both chuckle]

Yellowstone, here I come. [laughs]

- That's a solid choice. - It's actually my favorite.

Is that where you got the patch?

No, it came with the hoodie.

Actually, I picked it because of the patch.

I got it at Goodwill.

- Which one? - Echo Park, on Sunset.

Huh, yeah, that's where I donate.

Huh, small world.

Well, uh, you have a good one.

Hey, can... can I see you again?

Yeah, sure.

What are you doing tomorrow?

[indistinct chatter]

- You look lost. - First time?

No, but it's my first time here.

Other end of the hall.

This is my favorite part of the week, actually.

- Your favorite? - Wow.

I leave my regular spot

feeling like I just broke out of detention.

Ooh, yeah, I know what you mean.

Some places can be kind of preachy.

- Or cult-y. - Mm, definitely.

[both laugh] This place is chill, though.

It's mostly just queers and POC.

People who have really been through it, you know?

I'm Tommy, by the way.

Jules.

[indistinct chatter]

- Hi. - [chatter continues]

[door closes] What's up, man?

Good to see you.

Yeah, yeah.

Boop.

[laughs] What's up?

Hey, do you guys mind scooting over?

You can sit right there if you want.

- Thanks. - Yeah.

Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

Hey. Hi.

- Nice to see you. - Nice to see you, too.

[chatter continues]

- Sorry. - Thanks.

Welcome, everyone.

We're going to start

with a reading from Leviticus 25:35.

"If any of your brothers become poor

"and are unable to support themselves among you,

help them as you would a foreigner."

- You want to share? - "That he may live with you."

Sure.

"Take no usury or interest from him,

but fear your God, that your brother may live with you."

So, new girl, what'd you think?

Uh, it was interesting.

Although I'm not totally sold on the whole God thing.

I'm in AA.

I was trying out a new meeting in this building,

and I figured out pretty early on this wasn't it.

But, um, we were sitting so close to the front,

it would have been weird for me to leave, so...

Hmm. So you stayed for the whole damn service.

- Yeah. - AA is pretty Jesus-y, too.

[snickers]

Well, you gonna be okay without a meeting?

Yeah, I do usually need meetings.

But tonight I kind of just wanted to get out of the house.

Well, next time you want to get out of the house,

you should call me.

- That's, uh, neighborly of you. - Here, I'll give you my number.

- Leigh? - I'm in here.

I am so sorry I didn't make it to the studio.

I totally lost track of time.

Do you want me to send you a reminder

for your 4:00 p.m. tomorrow?

- It's in my calendar. - I will be there.

Hey, what do you think about this?

I think it's a dress.

It was one of Matt's favorites.

Oh.

I'm going on a date tomorrow.

Uh, wait. Like, with the guy you were sleeping with?

Who?

- Condom guy. - Oh, Postmates guy.

No, no, no, that was just sex.

This is a new guy. I met him today.

His name is Javi.

- So it's a first date. - That's huge.

Do you feel ready?

I don't know, but I want to be.

Okay.

So what's Javi's deal?

He likes record stores and national parks.

- Where is he from? - 1917?

- Sure, that tracks. - [laughs]

- Sexy time traveler. - Yeah, why not?

[scoffs] Okay.

Danny.

[groans softly]

For six months,

all people have wanted to talk to me about was...

how great my brother was...

how tragic that he's gone.

But he was a... brother sometimes, too.

Nobody wants to hear about that.

[somber music]

Are you so selfish you can't handle

one night being about anyone else?

You want to talk selfish, let's go.

Dad's funeral...

you were so checked out, I had to do everything alone.

Undertakers, caterers, Mom's endless crying.

I even had to pick the casket. That was a fun conversation.

I was having a hard time.

And nine months later, when I got the job offer to Singapore,

you said to really think about if it felt right

to move 9,000 miles away less than a year after Dad died.

So I stayed.

And a couple months later, you met Leigh.

And you started spending all your time with her,

and it was like you lived in another country.

Danny... you okay?

Take your time.

I mean, come on, you can't handle one night

- being about someone else? - You are such a hypocrite!

When you're being selfish, it's always for a good reason.

But when I'm selfish, I'm the worst person that ever lived.

You live in this fantasy world

where you think you're this great guy,

but you let me down so many times.

And you can't even acknowledge it,

much less apologize for it.

[music continues]

Danny?

I was an asshole to my mom yesterday.

And I didn't want to be,

but every time she brings him up, I just go off.

And I keep replaying

this one fight Matt and I had in my head.

And I'm finally saying all the things

I should have said to him

What's the point?

You know, he's already had the last word,

and he's never gonna hear the things that I want to tell him.

[somber music]

Well?

Well, what?

Does anybody have anything grief-group-y to say?

You'll get through it.

- Anger is normal. - Let yourself feel it.

You won't be there forever.

You'll remember the good things.

What if there's nothing good to remember?

What if the bad stuff is the real stuff...

And...

I'm just seeing that now?

[music continues]

[indistinct chatter]

[laughter]

Anyway, that's why I don't, you know, pray before meals.

It just reminds me too much of my super-Catholic family

and their super-Catholic rules.

So, well, how do you access you-know-who?

- Wow, hot take. - [chuckles]

- You know God isn't Voldemort? - [chuckles]

Uh, yeah, I don't know She's, um...

my friend, my boss, my partner, my lover.

- Sounds complicated. - Um, do you want some of this?

Yes.

I mean, I've learned that God is always there for me.

She knows all of me, and She loves me exactly as I am.

- Oh. All of you. - [laughs]

Uh, yeah, God's gonna need to strike some things

from my record if She wants to be friends.

Yeah, well, we've all done stuff, Jules.

People don't go to church 'cause they're perfect.

[woman speaks Spanish]

- Thank you. - Thanks.

Hey, so, uh... do you get a finder's fee

for every new person you bring in or...

- Oh, okay, yeah. - Too much church.

Sorry about that. I am...

Look, I'm not good at, like, first-date small talk.

- This is a date? - I wasn't sure.

I mean, I brought you to my secret tamale spot.

I'm literally holding a tamale for you.

[both laugh]

I thought maybe you were being nice to me

because you felt sorry for me.

Why would I feel sorry for you?

My knee.

No, because I'm an alcoholic and, you know,

I don't have a life outside of work or recovery.

- Jules... - Look, I'm sorry, I...

Yeah, I don't know why I am, um...

I don't know what I'm doing right now.

You want to start over?

Like God, I-I actually believe in second chances...

and third and fourth.

But that's it. Don't... no more.

[chuckles]

- Maybe fifth. - [chuckles]

- Thank you, you guys. - Great job.

- I'll see you next time. - Thanks for coming.

- Good to see you. - Oh!

Good to see you.

Well, I guess I'm gonna go home

and get ready.

How is someone supposed to act on a first date again?

Ooh.

You are asking the wrong person for that advice, my friend.

[laughs]

I'm sorry that I was late.

Um, thank you for covering.

Covering is a strong word for what I did.

I can't teach. I just stalled.

- It was awkward. - Yeah, well, I really am sorry.

I don't know what happened.

I thought I set a reminder, but...

- Can I say something? - Mm-hmm.

I just feel like, um...

even when you are here, you don't really want to be here.

And I think that's why enrollment in your classes

has dropped off.

Okay, um...

I think there's, like, a few people that stopped coming.

It's almost 40%.

Okay, that's a lot.

Do you still care about this job?

Uh...

I don't really know how to answer that.

- Well, I can answer it. - I still care about it.

A lot, actually.

Jules, you know that I've...

I've got a lot going on right now.

So does the studio, and I can't keep doing it alone.

Look, Vanessa has been asking to do more,

and maybe I should just let her.

If you can't handle your workload,

I can give it to someone who wants it.

[laughs] Are you...

are you firing me?

[scoffs]

I... guess?

[laughing] Wow.

Look...

we don't have to pay rent on Mom's house.

I can cover groceries and stuff.

Take a month. Take two.

Take the time. Figure things out.

I've got you.

Okay.

Um...

[door opens]

[door closes]

both: Thank you.

- Cheers. - Mm.

[chuckles]

- Sorry. Weird day. - [chuckles]

- So you work for the Internet. - Mm-hmm.

Yeah, that might be a deal breaker.

- Okay. - Well, have a nice evening.

All right, I'll just take care of the check.

- Don't even worry about it. - [laughs]

So what's your problem with the internet?

Mm.

Screens in general.

You know, I heard somewhere that people spend 11 hours a day

just staring at a screen.

It's kind of creepy. [both chuckle]

- Want to sit? - Sure.

Yeah, I mean, it is creepy.

But isn't that just living in the 21st century?

[chuckles]

Ah, it doesn't have to be.

- I have a flip phone. - Oh, cool.

Congratulations.

And I check my emails at the library,

and I work as a handyman.

And when I'm not working, I'm out there in the real world

still doing real-world things.

I go hiking, listen to music, meet new people.

- That sounds really lovely. - It is.

Come to the Dark Side.

- Oh, boy. - Join me.

[both laugh]

Well, the next time I see my boss, the Internet,

- I will put in my two weeks. - [laughs]

I'm really glad you walked into the record store when you did.

What are the odds?

Well, maybe it was fate or a sign.

A sign of what?

I don't know. I'm still trying to figure that one out.

[laughs]

Cheers to that.

- This is it. - It's really nice.

Yeah, it was a... when I moved it,

but I've been fixing it up.

[door closes]

[inhales sharply] Do-do-do-do...

[record player creaks and clicks]

Oh, I like this piece.

Thanks.

[soft music playing]

All right.

My place runs a little cold, so let me know if...

[music continues]

Everything okay?

Yeah, could we, um...

slow down a bit?

- Yeah, yeah, sure. - No problem.

You want something to drink? Some water?

- How about something stronger? - Yeah.

Uh, I'll make us some cocktails. You like bourbon?

Yeah.

- You sure you're okay? - Mm-hmm.

All right, be right back.

[music continues]

[ice scraping, clattering]

[tense music]

[soft music continues playing]

[gate creaks]

[gate closes]

[breathing heavily]

[music continues]

[grunts]

[music continues]

How much gas do you have in your car?

- How is this gonna work? - We're gonna gamble,

we're gonna drink, and we'll do other stuff.

This is the best I've felt in a really long time.

I think we're allowed to feel good.

You know that this is rigged, right?

I've never felt like the universe

was more on my side than in this moment.

[both laugh]

I point to someone,

and you tell me their deepest, darkest secret.

Who's the first victim?

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