All language subtitles for SMOKEY AND THE BANDIT 3 (1983) 720p HDTV {solstars}

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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:03,845 --> 00:00:05,303 [Car engine starts] 2 00:00:05,847 --> 00:00:07,673 [Tyres screeching] 3 00:00:09,000 --> 00:00:15,074 Advertise your product or brand here contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today 4 00:00:18,380 --> 00:00:24,587 Once upon a time, there was a famous Sheriff. It Was Not so 5 00:00:34,751 --> 00:00:37,040 [Heroic instrumental music] 6 00:00:56,648 --> 00:00:59,022 Bandit, me and Fred've got a question. 7 00:00:59,110 --> 00:01:00,484 BANDIT: What do you and Fred want? 8 00:01:00,569 --> 00:01:02,676 - How come we doing this? - Why not? 9 00:01:02,713 --> 00:01:05,620 - They said it couldn't be done. - That's the reason. 10 00:01:05,656 --> 00:01:07,597 That's good with Fred. We're clear. 11 00:01:08,161 --> 00:01:09,276 Ten-four. 12 00:01:09,454 --> 00:01:11,961 I'm Big Enos Burdette. 13 00:01:12,998 --> 00:01:15,156 This is my son, Little Enos. 14 00:01:17,462 --> 00:01:19,787 [Fast-paced country instrumental music] 15 00:01:24,803 --> 00:01:26,961 Hold on to your ass, Fred. 16 00:01:29,432 --> 00:01:32,385 [Fast-paced country instrumental music continues] 17 00:01:34,229 --> 00:01:36,519 What we're dealing with here... 18 00:01:36,606 --> 00:01:41,204 is a complete lack of respect for the law. 19 00:01:57,168 --> 00:01:59,921 [Fast-paced country instrumental music continues] 20 00:02:12,100 --> 00:02:18,191 Nobody makes Sheriff Buford T. Justice look like a possum's pecker. 21 00:02:23,320 --> 00:02:25,028 JUNIOR: Daddy, look out! 22 00:02:31,536 --> 00:02:35,243 JUNIOR: Daddy? BUFORD: Shut up, Junior. I'm thinking. 23 00:02:35,279 --> 00:02:38,569 - What are you thinking about? - Retiring. 24 00:02:44,925 --> 00:02:46,468 MAN: Atten-hut! 25 00:02:49,389 --> 00:02:52,093 [Drum roll] 26 00:02:57,522 --> 00:02:59,681 [Bugle playing] 27 00:03:11,702 --> 00:03:14,679 You can all sit down now. 28 00:03:17,751 --> 00:03:21,878 I want to thank you nice ladies and gentlemen... 29 00:03:22,046 --> 00:03:24,585 and my fellow officers... 30 00:03:24,675 --> 00:03:28,624 for coming here this evening to celebrate the retirement... 31 00:03:28,720 --> 00:03:33,414 of an old friend, Sheriff Buford T. Justice. 32 00:03:33,684 --> 00:03:36,887 I think I can truthfully say... 33 00:03:36,978 --> 00:03:39,731 that tonight I feel as if I... 34 00:03:39,816 --> 00:03:42,934 were emerging victoriously... 35 00:03:43,026 --> 00:03:46,360 from a 35-year war. 36 00:03:46,446 --> 00:03:50,240 A war to uphold law and order. 37 00:03:50,276 --> 00:03:52,040 LITTLE ENOS: Daddy, I'm bored. 38 00:03:52,077 --> 00:03:55,050 I'm bored hearing about your boredom. 39 00:03:55,101 --> 00:03:58,121 That's why I went to all this trouble. Now we're going to have fun! 40 00:03:58,158 --> 00:04:01,139 As much fun as putting Ex-Lax in the Dallas water supply? 41 00:04:01,176 --> 00:04:03,719 Yeah, and then cornering the market on toilet paper. 42 00:04:03,755 --> 00:04:05,292 More fun than that. 43 00:04:05,383 --> 00:04:09,811 And what fond memories were brought back... 44 00:04:10,596 --> 00:04:14,843 when I saw those 211s, the 502s... 45 00:04:15,143 --> 00:04:18,843 and the DWls and the APBs... 46 00:04:19,772 --> 00:04:24,987 but most of all, those hot pursuits. 47 00:04:25,023 --> 00:04:28,057 You're going to pee in your pants watching that county mountie... 48 00:04:28,093 --> 00:04:29,648 hump across six states. 49 00:04:29,684 --> 00:04:32,135 I don't think the Sheriff will buy your plan, frankly. 50 00:04:32,171 --> 00:04:36,942 Trust me, son. If there's one thing that egomaniac can't refuse... 51 00:04:36,978 --> 00:04:39,130 it's a public challenge. 52 00:04:39,167 --> 00:04:43,760 BUFORD:... that I have marched through a wave of crime and criminals... 53 00:04:43,796 --> 00:04:47,123 like crap through a moose. 54 00:04:47,159 --> 00:04:48,589 [Snoring] 55 00:04:49,219 --> 00:04:54,937 In the '60s, I chased those pimply-faced, long-haired hippies. 56 00:04:54,973 --> 00:04:56,503 And I caught them. 57 00:04:56,539 --> 00:04:59,232 BUFORD: Then in the '70s, I chased- BIG ENOS: The Bandit! 58 00:04:59,268 --> 00:05:01,984 What about The Bandit? 59 00:05:02,399 --> 00:05:05,568 Yeah, Daddy? What about The Bandit? 60 00:05:05,605 --> 00:05:07,907 Sit down, you tick turd! 61 00:05:10,407 --> 00:05:15,538 I chased that boy for over 3,000 miles. 62 00:05:15,663 --> 00:05:17,869 Through 20 states. 63 00:05:17,957 --> 00:05:21,457 - But you didn't catch him. - So I didn't catch him. 64 00:05:21,544 --> 00:05:25,168 What the hell difference does it make? But I'll bet- 65 00:05:25,255 --> 00:05:27,289 - Okay. - Okay, what? 66 00:05:27,383 --> 00:05:30,171 - Okay, let's bet. - What are you talking about? 67 00:05:30,303 --> 00:05:34,549 What we're talking about is a simple contest, a little race. 68 00:05:34,640 --> 00:05:36,679 And if you win, Sheriff... 69 00:05:36,767 --> 00:05:42,761 we Enoses are going to pony up $250,000. 70 00:05:42,816 --> 00:05:47,110 If you lose, you fork over that silly symbol... 71 00:05:47,195 --> 00:05:51,220 you've been shoving in people's faces all these years. 72 00:05:51,366 --> 00:05:53,841 Your badge. 73 00:05:54,786 --> 00:06:00,792 This badge means more to me than anything else in the world. 74 00:06:00,829 --> 00:06:04,080 And I'd like nothing more than anything else in the world... 75 00:06:04,116 --> 00:06:05,752 to run you into the ground. 76 00:06:05,839 --> 00:06:08,993 You and that excuse for a son, 77 00:06:08,994 --> 00:06:12,308 who looks just like a flea's pecker. 78 00:06:13,723 --> 00:06:17,192 However, I'm going to retire. 79 00:06:17,228 --> 00:06:21,239 I'm going down to Florida and sit in the sun with my son. 80 00:06:21,275 --> 00:06:25,264 Remember, we're talking about an awful lot of money here. 81 00:06:25,301 --> 00:06:28,755 So if you change your mind, you know where to reach us. 82 00:06:28,792 --> 00:06:31,655 Thanks, but no thanks. 83 00:06:31,741 --> 00:06:35,606 And now, ladies and gentlemen, at this very moment... 84 00:06:35,643 --> 00:06:41,425 I proclaim myself retired. 85 00:06:45,838 --> 00:06:47,297 [Person mimicking fart] 86 00:06:49,342 --> 00:06:51,133 [Applause dying down] 87 00:06:54,056 --> 00:06:55,549 [Drum roll] 88 00:06:59,936 --> 00:07:01,148 [Pleasant country song] 89 00:07:01,185 --> 00:07:04,935 Buford T. Justice Fearless law of Texas 90 00:07:05,024 --> 00:07:08,025 The man who chased The Bandit coast to coast 91 00:07:08,778 --> 00:07:12,646 Buford T. Justice Now you've up and left us 92 00:07:12,741 --> 00:07:16,757 Where are you, Justice when we need you the most 93 00:07:19,331 --> 00:07:23,094 Some say you're a lunatic Some say you're a buffoon 94 00:07:23,131 --> 00:07:26,625 Some say you're a fooI with a gun 95 00:07:26,984 --> 00:07:30,922 Though you stuck to him like glue 96 00:07:30,958 --> 00:07:35,523 Now who'd have thought you'd walk away before the job was done 97 00:07:39,518 --> 00:07:43,144 The man who chased The Bandit coast to coast 98 00:07:43,480 --> 00:07:47,229 Buford T. Justice Now you've up and left us 99 00:07:47,526 --> 00:07:51,825 Where are you, Justice when we need you the most 100 00:07:56,660 --> 00:08:00,852 You're a hero to your ego a legend in your own mind 101 00:08:00,888 --> 00:08:04,186 To serve and protect has been your word 102 00:08:04,377 --> 00:08:08,374 But can you stand to sit it out when pride is on the line 103 00:08:08,410 --> 00:08:12,691 And "What about The Bandit?" was the last thing that you heard 104 00:08:13,011 --> 00:08:16,842 You're Buford T. Justice Fearless law of Texas 105 00:08:16,930 --> 00:08:20,180 Man who chased The Bandit coast to coast 106 00:08:20,935 --> 00:08:24,883 Buford T. Justice Now you've up and left us 107 00:08:24,920 --> 00:08:29,044 Where are you, Justice when we need you the most 108 00:08:29,319 --> 00:08:33,523 Just like some old gray race horse, you've been put to graze 109 00:08:33,559 --> 00:08:37,534 They say you're over the hill now and you've seen your better days 110 00:08:37,619 --> 00:08:40,818 Like that old race horse, you still hear that bell 111 00:08:40,854 --> 00:08:45,321 If a hot chase was heaven Now the good life is hell 112 00:09:01,790 --> 00:09:05,769 Well, you took on all those outlaws and the weirdoes with the hair 113 00:09:05,805 --> 00:09:09,243 You stood for law and order all the way 114 00:09:09,401 --> 00:09:13,500 Now, you're standing on your records But does anybody care 115 00:09:13,537 --> 00:09:17,952 You're still known as the boob who let the big one get away 116 00:09:18,285 --> 00:09:22,153 'Cause you're Buford T. Justice, Fearless law of Texas 117 00:09:22,248 --> 00:09:25,414 The man who chased The Bandit coast to coast 118 00:09:26,169 --> 00:09:29,869 Buford T. Justice Now you've up and left us 119 00:09:30,339 --> 00:09:33,874 Where are you, Justice when we need you the most 120 00:09:34,886 --> 00:09:38,337 Where are you, Justice when we need you the most 121 00:09:39,765 --> 00:09:43,681 Where are you, Justice when we need you the most 122 00:09:48,482 --> 00:09:50,356 [Screaming] 123 00:09:52,154 --> 00:09:56,103 Junior, retirement is cat shit. 124 00:09:56,199 --> 00:09:58,927 Let's get the Enoses. 125 00:09:59,285 --> 00:10:01,243 [Marching band music playing] 126 00:10:05,709 --> 00:10:07,909 JUNIOR: Oh, look, Daddy! 127 00:10:08,002 --> 00:10:10,042 The June Taylor Dancers. 128 00:10:14,801 --> 00:10:17,258 [Marching band music continues playing] 129 00:10:20,057 --> 00:10:24,367 - There's our turkey. - Let's go stuff him! 130 00:10:26,981 --> 00:10:30,266 Daddy, they're taking our picture. Wet your lips. 131 00:10:30,359 --> 00:10:32,309 Shut up, shit. 132 00:10:32,402 --> 00:10:34,479 Well, welcome, Sheriff. 133 00:10:34,906 --> 00:10:37,029 What the hell's going on? 134 00:10:37,367 --> 00:10:41,667 These are a few of Daddy's closest friends. Just came to see you off. 135 00:10:41,745 --> 00:10:45,454 Let's cut the crap and get down to the nitty-gritty. 136 00:10:45,490 --> 00:10:47,730 Well, you're a sporting man, Sheriff. 137 00:10:47,767 --> 00:10:50,080 We're going to bet you $250,000... 138 00:10:50,170 --> 00:10:51,998 against your tin star... 139 00:10:52,090 --> 00:10:54,716 that you can't drive from here in Miami... 140 00:10:54,717 --> 00:10:57,552 to the Enos Ranch just outside of Austin, Texas... 141 00:10:57,637 --> 00:11:00,171 by 5:30 tomorrow afternoon. 142 00:11:00,223 --> 00:11:04,061 That's only 1,400 miles. What's the catch? 143 00:11:04,185 --> 00:11:05,829 There's the catch. 144 00:11:05,866 --> 00:11:10,624 JUNIOR: Look at that big ugly fish, Daddy. BUFORD: Looks like your mama. 145 00:11:12,694 --> 00:11:15,173 Smells like your mama, too. 146 00:11:15,210 --> 00:11:17,562 That's our advertising campaign. Get it? 147 00:11:17,598 --> 00:11:18,444 Fish and chips. 148 00:11:18,533 --> 00:11:22,317 We're opening up fast-food franchises all over the South. 149 00:11:23,246 --> 00:11:25,743 BUFORD: Get that off the top of my car! 150 00:11:25,780 --> 00:11:29,131 A little respect, Sheriff. That's our logo. 151 00:11:29,335 --> 00:11:31,538 Daddy, what's a logo? 152 00:11:31,546 --> 00:11:33,338 Something like a flounder. 153 00:11:33,507 --> 00:11:37,042 That's in the great tradition of American advertising. 154 00:11:37,136 --> 00:11:40,601 And you got to carry it. Otherwise, no bet. 155 00:11:40,705 --> 00:11:42,036 I get it. 156 00:11:42,073 --> 00:11:46,670 You're trying to humiliate me so I won't take the bet. 157 00:11:47,229 --> 00:11:49,268 BUFORD: Get in the car, Junior. 158 00:11:49,480 --> 00:11:52,518 Now then, Sheriff, be careful with the badge. 159 00:11:52,609 --> 00:11:56,500 It's going to make a beautiful belt buckle for me. 160 00:11:56,536 --> 00:11:58,362 If you get my badge... 161 00:11:58,450 --> 00:12:03,624 it's going to be a seven-pointed suppository. 162 00:12:08,001 --> 00:12:10,982 He fell for it, hook, line, and sinker. 163 00:12:11,045 --> 00:12:13,452 [Marching band music playing] 164 00:12:21,305 --> 00:12:24,473 JUNIOR: Be careful, Daddy! BUFORD: Don't worry, Junior. 165 00:12:24,559 --> 00:12:29,211 BUFORD: I know a shortcut. We'll be out of here in no time. 166 00:12:29,247 --> 00:12:32,106 JUNIOR: Daddy, we've been driving around for two-and-a-half hours... 167 00:12:32,192 --> 00:12:35,150 and we're still in downtown Miami. 168 00:12:36,029 --> 00:12:39,890 I'm as confused as a baby raccoon. 169 00:12:39,927 --> 00:12:42,087 I don't know where the hell we are. 170 00:12:42,124 --> 00:12:46,313 - It's right here on the map. - Get that damn thing out of my face! 171 00:12:46,350 --> 00:12:47,847 I was only trying to help. 172 00:12:47,884 --> 00:12:50,750 You want to help? Jump out the window. 173 00:12:50,961 --> 00:12:53,270 JUNIOR: Turn left here, Daddy. 174 00:12:55,298 --> 00:12:57,320 Look at all these people, Daddy. 175 00:12:57,356 --> 00:13:00,224 BUFORD: Junior, what you got us into now? 176 00:13:00,260 --> 00:13:03,486 Come on, get out the way! We're in a hurry! 177 00:13:06,102 --> 00:13:08,427 I think we've crossed the border. 178 00:13:08,521 --> 00:13:12,008 Hey, you want to buy some food for your fish? 179 00:13:12,774 --> 00:13:14,981 BUFORD: Up yours and that fish. 180 00:13:16,153 --> 00:13:17,398 [Man speaking in Spanish] 181 00:13:17,488 --> 00:13:20,358 Get the hell out of here. I know what time it is. 182 00:13:21,887 --> 00:13:24,704 Get back! 183 00:13:24,740 --> 00:13:28,521 You'd think they never saw a car with a big fish on top. 184 00:13:28,558 --> 00:13:31,729 Ladies, nice ladies. 185 00:13:33,629 --> 00:13:35,809 Could you possibly tell me... 186 00:13:35,845 --> 00:13:38,415 how to get to the Florida Turnpike? 187 00:13:38,759 --> 00:13:40,966 [Women speaking in Spanish] 188 00:13:48,687 --> 00:13:52,733 Thank you, nice ladies. Thank you, you've been very helpful. 189 00:13:53,065 --> 00:13:54,394 You dirty old... 190 00:13:54,483 --> 00:13:56,498 JUNIOR: I think she said turn left. 191 00:13:56,534 --> 00:13:58,986 BUFORD: I know she said turn left! 192 00:13:59,022 --> 00:14:04,107 I understand the German language enough to understand what she told me! 193 00:14:08,123 --> 00:14:11,732 I guess that bought us about a two-and-a-half minute delay. 194 00:14:11,768 --> 00:14:15,784 This is going to be the most fun we ever had with our pants on. 195 00:14:15,820 --> 00:14:17,779 [Speaking in Spanish] 196 00:14:25,849 --> 00:14:28,417 BIG ENOS: Did you remember to take care of the gas tank? 197 00:14:28,454 --> 00:14:31,781 LITTLE ENOS: Do bears defecate rurally? 198 00:14:33,649 --> 00:14:36,270 [Car engine stalling] 199 00:14:42,032 --> 00:14:44,025 - What's the matter, Daddy? - Gas! 200 00:14:44,326 --> 00:14:46,319 Must be that pizza you had for lunch. 201 00:14:46,411 --> 00:14:49,828 Not my belly, the tank! Didn't you fill it up? 202 00:14:49,958 --> 00:14:53,906 - Well, I thought- - You thought? What the hell did you use? 203 00:14:53,961 --> 00:14:57,709 - It has to be pushed! - We can do that easy, Daddy. 204 00:14:57,746 --> 00:15:01,285 What is that "we" crap? You know I got a double hernia. 205 00:15:01,510 --> 00:15:03,065 You push, I'll steer. 206 00:15:03,101 --> 00:15:06,141 Oh, thank you, Daddy. I knew you'd help me. 207 00:15:11,312 --> 00:15:13,601 He's dumb... 208 00:15:13,690 --> 00:15:15,904 but a loveable shit. 209 00:15:17,026 --> 00:15:19,600 [Lively country instrumental music] 210 00:15:32,709 --> 00:15:34,915 [Car horn honking] 211 00:15:36,504 --> 00:15:39,086 Delays like this are going to kill us. 212 00:15:39,175 --> 00:15:43,482 Stopping off for gas, getting caught in traffic jams. 213 00:15:43,519 --> 00:15:46,330 Everything's against us. 214 00:15:48,267 --> 00:15:50,723 JUNIOR: Look out for that car, Daddy! 215 00:15:54,607 --> 00:15:57,685 BUFORD: Where's that fool going? 216 00:15:58,277 --> 00:16:00,404 Daddy, he came awful close. 217 00:16:00,441 --> 00:16:04,035 You should never give a dummy like that a license. 218 00:16:04,700 --> 00:16:06,574 [Car horn honking] 219 00:16:06,660 --> 00:16:12,122 BUFORD: Tell that road-hog Rembrandt I'm coming around, and to look out! 220 00:16:13,584 --> 00:16:16,704 Hey, road-hog Rembrandt, look- 221 00:16:18,547 --> 00:16:19,710 Out. 222 00:16:21,551 --> 00:16:24,224 We cost them some time there, son. 223 00:16:24,260 --> 00:16:29,225 I wonder how Junior likes life in the dumb lane. 224 00:16:30,060 --> 00:16:33,197 Daddy, my face is all white. 225 00:16:33,234 --> 00:16:37,392 Well, put a little lipstick on, I'll drop you off at a gay bar. 226 00:16:39,111 --> 00:16:40,984 [Tyres screeching] 227 00:16:41,822 --> 00:16:43,512 What are we stopping for? 228 00:16:43,548 --> 00:16:48,543 It's time to take out some insurance, teach those county mounties a lesson. 229 00:16:48,579 --> 00:16:51,957 I don't get it. I mean, they certainly lost enough time as it is. 230 00:16:51,993 --> 00:16:53,616 We're winning, ain't we? 231 00:16:53,652 --> 00:16:57,187 We're winning, son, but winning isn't everything. 232 00:16:57,223 --> 00:17:00,509 - What is? - Winning dirty, boy. 233 00:17:00,546 --> 00:17:01,632 What's the matter with you? 234 00:17:01,716 --> 00:17:04,676 Sorry, Daddy. I lost my head. 235 00:17:04,712 --> 00:17:08,843 BIG ENOS: Shame, Little Enos. LITTLE ENOS: Ashamed, Daddy. 236 00:17:08,880 --> 00:17:11,401 Look, Daddy, here they come. 237 00:17:12,270 --> 00:17:15,132 BIG ENOS: They're coming, all right. 238 00:17:15,313 --> 00:17:17,851 [Big Enos whistling] 239 00:17:24,823 --> 00:17:27,195 They put up a roadblock, Daddy. 240 00:17:27,660 --> 00:17:30,281 LITTLE ENOS: Daddy. They aren't going to stop! 241 00:17:30,371 --> 00:17:34,631 Hold on tight. This might be a little bumpy. 242 00:17:58,066 --> 00:18:00,687 LITTLE ENOS: This was a brilliant idea. 243 00:18:00,777 --> 00:18:04,802 Don't worry, Son. I've got something up my sleeve. 244 00:18:04,839 --> 00:18:07,581 I hope it's a chocolate chip cookie, Daddy. 245 00:18:07,618 --> 00:18:11,825 You can dunk my doughnuts if it ain't a great idea. 246 00:18:11,830 --> 00:18:13,574 [Engine cranking] 247 00:18:13,666 --> 00:18:16,121 It seems to be flooded. 248 00:18:16,209 --> 00:18:18,405 No shit. 249 00:18:19,963 --> 00:18:25,253 BUFORD: Buckle up, Junior, we're going to make a lot of time now! 250 00:18:25,718 --> 00:18:27,297 [Lively country instrumental music] 251 00:18:27,388 --> 00:18:29,222 BIG ENOS: This is it, son. 252 00:18:29,258 --> 00:18:32,654 BIG ENOS: I thought from the start this was a one-man job. 253 00:18:32,691 --> 00:18:36,445 There's only one man I know that's never let us down. 254 00:18:36,481 --> 00:18:39,475 Homogenise my hostility! Would you be speaking of- 255 00:18:39,566 --> 00:18:42,639 BIG ENOS: No, I'm not talking about that egomaniac. 256 00:18:42,676 --> 00:18:45,369 I'm talking about the only one we can really trust: 257 00:18:45,406 --> 00:18:46,506 The Snowman. 258 00:18:46,542 --> 00:18:48,732 Now get me that phone. 259 00:18:50,645 --> 00:18:52,539 That isn't the phone. 260 00:19:02,173 --> 00:19:05,082 Fred, you don't know what it means having you here. 261 00:19:05,118 --> 00:19:10,359 You're the ugliest. Look at your eyes. Your eyes sag, your ears. Look at that. 262 00:19:10,395 --> 00:19:13,641 CLEDUS: Eight yards long. Your lips... And your breath's bad. 263 00:19:13,678 --> 00:19:16,449 The next time I buy them deodorising dog biscuits... 264 00:19:16,486 --> 00:19:17,642 you're going to eat them! 265 00:19:17,647 --> 00:19:18,762 [Car phone ringing] 266 00:19:18,857 --> 00:19:20,385 Hang on. 267 00:19:21,693 --> 00:19:24,986 Mule Barn, you got The Snowman. How about- 268 00:19:25,237 --> 00:19:29,699 Look, lover boy, I've got $250,000... 269 00:19:29,784 --> 00:19:32,465 with your name on it if you help us out. 270 00:19:32,478 --> 00:19:36,788 Two hundred and fifty... 271 00:19:37,709 --> 00:19:42,674 You mean, I don't have to drive the truck or haul nothing but my ass? 272 00:19:42,882 --> 00:19:44,452 I'm going to be The Bandit. 273 00:19:44,489 --> 00:19:48,057 Do I get to wear the hat? The shirt? 274 00:19:48,845 --> 00:19:50,780 And drive the car! 275 00:19:52,141 --> 00:19:53,459 CLEDUS: Now, listen! 276 00:19:53,496 --> 00:19:56,373 I think you just got yourself a Bandit. Bye! 277 00:19:56,410 --> 00:19:59,063 I'm going to be The Bandit! I love it! The Bandit. 278 00:19:59,147 --> 00:20:01,983 Wear the hat, drive the car. I love it. Give me the car. 279 00:20:03,236 --> 00:20:05,690 [Classical instrumental music] 280 00:20:06,655 --> 00:20:10,116 INSTRUCTOR: All right, Mrs. Fernbush, let's remember the procedures. 281 00:20:10,153 --> 00:20:13,303 Look both ways before entering the flow of traffic. 282 00:20:13,329 --> 00:20:16,554 Politeness pays, but look both ways. 283 00:20:16,591 --> 00:20:21,097 Give her a little gas, and let up lightly on the clutch. 284 00:20:23,297 --> 00:20:25,671 [Cheerful country instrumental music] 285 00:20:38,271 --> 00:20:39,681 JUNIOR: Turn right! 286 00:20:49,573 --> 00:20:51,947 What an asshole! 287 00:20:52,035 --> 00:20:53,067 [Fast-paced country song] 288 00:20:53,161 --> 00:20:56,286 Hold on, Dixie Bandit's on the road again 289 00:20:56,706 --> 00:20:58,116 Look out! 290 00:21:01,253 --> 00:21:04,337 I'm going to be The Bandit. I'm going to... 291 00:21:05,757 --> 00:21:07,215 CLEDUS: Oh, Fred? 292 00:21:07,301 --> 00:21:10,964 CLEDUS: I mashed your doghouse, son, but don't worry. I'll buy you... 293 00:21:11,000 --> 00:21:13,826 CLEDUS: Fred, I'll buy you a whole condominium. 294 00:21:13,862 --> 00:21:17,719 CLEDUS: Listen, with the money we... Come here, you. 295 00:21:17,811 --> 00:21:22,601 CLEDUS: Now go find your fireplug. I'm going to go put on my Bandit clothes. 296 00:21:22,638 --> 00:21:26,694 CLEDUS: I'm going to be The Bandit. I'm going to be The Bandit! I love it! 297 00:21:26,730 --> 00:21:29,357 [Lively instrumental music] 298 00:21:40,917 --> 00:21:42,911 [Klansmen laughing and whooping] 299 00:21:43,004 --> 00:21:45,611 KLANSMAN: Come on, get after him! Hey, bubba! 300 00:21:45,647 --> 00:21:48,192 MAN: This ain't good, man. This ain't good at all. 301 00:21:48,229 --> 00:21:51,571 I'm not scared of these crackers. I'm black and I'm proud. 302 00:21:51,607 --> 00:21:54,804 Three hundred years of experience tells me... 303 00:21:54,891 --> 00:21:58,045 that you aren't being nothing but black and loud. 304 00:22:02,982 --> 00:22:07,035 - You better pull over. - I ain't pulling over for nobody. 305 00:22:08,988 --> 00:22:11,444 [Lively instrumental music continues] 306 00:22:55,661 --> 00:22:57,738 [Car horn honking] 307 00:22:59,290 --> 00:23:01,644 JUNIOR: We're not making very good time, Daddy. 308 00:23:01,660 --> 00:23:06,310 Well, as soon as I get around Col. Sanders, all that'll change. 309 00:23:14,431 --> 00:23:18,341 What the hell are those Klan clowns doing here? 310 00:23:18,392 --> 00:23:20,432 [Tyres screeching] 311 00:23:23,398 --> 00:23:26,020 [Fast-paced instrumental music] 312 00:23:36,161 --> 00:23:39,488 BUFORD: Here's how you handle the Klan, Junior. 313 00:23:44,920 --> 00:23:47,043 [Fast-paced instrumental music continues] 314 00:23:57,058 --> 00:23:58,033 [Chickens clucking] 315 00:23:58,121 --> 00:24:00,275 MAN: Get out of here, boy! 316 00:24:00,519 --> 00:24:02,428 [Men laughing] 317 00:24:04,753 --> 00:24:09,665 Lord have mercy! I must have died and gone to heaven! 318 00:24:10,946 --> 00:24:14,038 MAN: What goes around comes around! 319 00:24:14,325 --> 00:24:16,401 You ever join the Klan, Daddy? 320 00:24:16,494 --> 00:24:20,525 No chance. But your mama did. 321 00:24:20,562 --> 00:24:25,423 When she put on her sheet, she looked like an iceberg with feet. 322 00:24:26,671 --> 00:24:30,086 CLEDUS: The lid is what's going to make the kid. 323 00:24:31,134 --> 00:24:34,681 What do you think, my man? I'm talking bad, Fred. 324 00:24:34,717 --> 00:24:37,963 I mean, you got your Bandit, and then you got... 325 00:24:38,057 --> 00:24:40,786 Pray for that Bandit. How about you, Smokey? 326 00:24:40,810 --> 00:24:42,475 You got them ears on? 327 00:24:44,480 --> 00:24:46,972 Don't look at me like that, Fred. 328 00:24:47,067 --> 00:24:48,146 Fred! 329 00:24:48,235 --> 00:24:52,046 I told you I would love to take you, okay? But I can't take you. 330 00:24:52,083 --> 00:24:54,633 The Bandit didn't have no dog in the car with him! 331 00:24:54,670 --> 00:24:56,823 It just wouldn't look right. 332 00:24:56,911 --> 00:24:59,272 But... Look, Fred. 333 00:24:59,496 --> 00:25:02,282 What if you had your opportunity to be Rin Tin Tin? 334 00:25:02,373 --> 00:25:04,458 You wouldn't say no to that, would you? 335 00:25:04,494 --> 00:25:07,335 No, you wouldn't. I get to be The Bandit. 336 00:25:07,421 --> 00:25:10,171 You want me to have that, don't you? Sure, you do. 337 00:25:10,256 --> 00:25:13,531 You're my buddy. Hey, I knew you was going to be lonesome. 338 00:25:13,568 --> 00:25:16,043 I knew I was going to be gone, so I took care of you. 339 00:25:16,138 --> 00:25:19,298 CLEDUS: Now just a minute. Here. Look here what I got for you, Fred. 340 00:25:19,391 --> 00:25:22,155 CLEDUS: I got you somebody I want you to meet, Fred. 341 00:25:22,192 --> 00:25:24,011 This is Freda. 342 00:25:27,608 --> 00:25:30,470 There we go. 343 00:25:31,362 --> 00:25:35,424 Freda, Fred. Fred, Freda. 344 00:25:35,460 --> 00:25:39,135 And by the power vested in me, as owner of both of you hounds... 345 00:25:39,171 --> 00:25:41,958 I now pronounce you basset and basset. 346 00:25:41,994 --> 00:25:45,619 Fred, that means you don't have to half-ass it. 347 00:25:46,378 --> 00:25:47,836 You get it? 348 00:25:48,380 --> 00:25:51,463 Excuse me. Listen. I've got work to do. 349 00:25:51,548 --> 00:25:53,621 You all have to entertain yourself... 350 00:25:53,658 --> 00:25:56,511 but The Bandit is gonna go smoke some smokies. 351 00:25:57,472 --> 00:25:59,215 [Car engine roaring] 352 00:26:01,433 --> 00:26:02,844 [Tyres screeching] 353 00:26:05,689 --> 00:26:08,096 [Upbeat country instrumental music] 354 00:26:14,281 --> 00:26:17,077 I'll tell you what. You want to see a bandit? 355 00:26:17,114 --> 00:26:20,830 You're looking at a bad bandit. I'm talking bad. 356 00:26:26,876 --> 00:26:30,377 Never should've put me in this thing, brother. 357 00:26:31,631 --> 00:26:32,746 [Upbeat country song] 358 00:26:32,841 --> 00:26:35,826 Hear that roar of thunder 359 00:26:36,636 --> 00:26:39,638 Hear those tyres scream 360 00:26:40,099 --> 00:26:42,765 He's every boy's hero 361 00:26:43,309 --> 00:26:45,789 Every lady's dream 362 00:26:46,105 --> 00:26:48,720 Flying down the highway heading west 363 00:26:48,757 --> 00:26:49,639 They love me. 364 00:26:49,734 --> 00:26:54,391 In a streak of black lightning Called the Bandit Express 365 00:26:54,447 --> 00:26:58,658 Look out, The Bandit's comin' Tyres screamin' engine hummin' 366 00:26:58,695 --> 00:27:00,563 Looks like The Bandit's on the move 367 00:27:00,600 --> 00:27:02,556 Bandit, if you could see me now. They love me. 368 00:27:02,580 --> 00:27:05,989 Look out, The Bandit's comin'.. Get your money and warn the women 369 00:27:06,026 --> 00:27:08,704 Tell those smokeys all to take a rest 370 00:27:09,003 --> 00:27:13,467 'Cause they'll never get the Bandit Express 371 00:27:18,846 --> 00:27:20,591 They never learn. 372 00:27:21,183 --> 00:27:24,681 Look out, The Bandit's comin' Get your money and warn the women 373 00:27:24,769 --> 00:27:27,806 Tell those smokeys all to take a rest 374 00:27:27,843 --> 00:27:31,459 'Cause they'll never get the Bandit Express 375 00:27:31,817 --> 00:27:36,156 Whoa, they'll never get the Bandit Express 376 00:27:42,286 --> 00:27:45,790 Junior, I want to tell you an interesting story. 377 00:27:46,041 --> 00:27:50,928 When the Pilgrim Justices landed on the shores of Texas... 378 00:27:51,713 --> 00:27:54,989 some of the male members of the family... 379 00:27:55,025 --> 00:27:57,334 became lawmen. 380 00:27:57,636 --> 00:28:01,171 All of the lawmen of the Justices... 381 00:28:01,265 --> 00:28:03,528 had sixth sense. 382 00:28:03,565 --> 00:28:07,950 - That's too bad. - What's too bad about having sixth sense? 383 00:28:08,042 --> 00:28:10,572 Well, that's not even a dime. 384 00:28:11,067 --> 00:28:13,735 Hi, folks, this is Dusty Trails, speaking to you live... 385 00:28:13,819 --> 00:28:17,380 from Town's Autorama on the corner of Second St. and Washington Blvd. 386 00:28:17,416 --> 00:28:19,445 I hope you're enjoying our million-dollar movie... 387 00:28:19,534 --> 00:28:22,251 and you're going to enjoy hearing from Skip. 388 00:28:22,288 --> 00:28:24,068 Take it away, Skip! 389 00:28:24,162 --> 00:28:27,437 Thank you, Dusty. Isn't she wonderfuI? 390 00:28:27,458 --> 00:28:30,433 Friends, before I forget, don't you forget... 391 00:28:30,538 --> 00:28:33,437 to come out here on Sunday and bring the kids. 392 00:28:33,881 --> 00:28:36,691 'Cause in addition to the best auto values in town... 393 00:28:36,780 --> 00:28:41,189 we're giving away free oatmeaI cookies baked by Dusty herself. 394 00:28:41,306 --> 00:28:44,556 Hard to believe somebody so pretty can cook too, isn't it, friends? 395 00:28:44,642 --> 00:28:46,987 Let's talk about the special of the week. 396 00:28:47,024 --> 00:28:50,222 It's a '76 Mercury Monarch, fully loaded... 397 00:28:50,356 --> 00:28:52,226 but you don't have to be to buy it. 398 00:28:52,262 --> 00:28:56,604 Yes, this low-mileage honey has got new rubber, factory air... 399 00:28:56,641 --> 00:29:02,271 AMIFM stereo and four brand-new shocks that I personally installed myself. 400 00:29:02,308 --> 00:29:05,077 Dusty, why don't you tell them about your cookies... 401 00:29:05,114 --> 00:29:08,445 while I climb up on the hood and demonstrate? 402 00:29:10,711 --> 00:29:14,044 If you really want to save yourself a lot of money and grief... 403 00:29:14,080 --> 00:29:16,601 stay as far away from this dump as you can. 404 00:29:16,638 --> 00:29:19,675 See that fool jumping up on the hood of that car? 405 00:29:19,845 --> 00:29:23,293 That fool wouldn't know a good deal if someone gave him four aces. 406 00:29:23,330 --> 00:29:27,601 When I moved here, I didn't know a soul, so I answered his ad for a bookkeeper. 407 00:29:27,637 --> 00:29:30,761 Should've been for a football player, considering the passes he made at me. 408 00:29:30,856 --> 00:29:33,726 He told me he loved me, needed me, and was leaving his wife. 409 00:29:33,817 --> 00:29:35,826 The only thing he left was fingerprints. 410 00:29:35,862 --> 00:29:38,082 Hell, he had no intention of divorcing his wife. 411 00:29:38,176 --> 00:29:41,488 The only intention he had was conning you people out of a lot of money. 412 00:29:41,575 --> 00:29:44,446 See that special he's jumping on? It's a special, all right. 413 00:29:44,537 --> 00:29:47,207 Just add three zeroes when you check out the mileage. 414 00:29:47,243 --> 00:29:48,974 It used to be a taxi! 415 00:29:49,011 --> 00:29:53,553 This gal is taking a walk on Skip Town, his lies, and his lemons! 416 00:29:53,796 --> 00:29:57,582 Folks, I'm a little irritated. Pardon me. I hope you enjoy the movie. 417 00:29:57,675 --> 00:30:00,037 But I am leaving. Bye! 418 00:30:00,345 --> 00:30:02,738 Dusty, Skip's going to freak when he hears that. 419 00:30:02,827 --> 00:30:04,547 DUSTY: That's his problem! 420 00:30:04,579 --> 00:30:06,830 DIRECTOR: Good luck, kid! 421 00:30:08,478 --> 00:30:12,150 DUSTY: Hold it! Thank you. 422 00:30:13,233 --> 00:30:15,210 I need a ride. 423 00:30:15,401 --> 00:30:17,193 CLEDUS: I hope you're going that way. 424 00:30:17,279 --> 00:30:20,093 DUSTY: I sure am. Go straight ahead. 425 00:30:22,451 --> 00:30:24,691 Look, do you mind if I change my clothes? 426 00:30:24,785 --> 00:30:26,993 Change your... What? In here? 427 00:30:27,080 --> 00:30:29,277 Oh, sure. No problem for me. 428 00:30:29,314 --> 00:30:31,538 - Now? In the car? - Yeah. 429 00:30:31,626 --> 00:30:34,607 You're not going to look. You're not a peeping Tom, are you? 430 00:30:34,629 --> 00:30:38,212 - I'm not... No! - Then there's no problem. 431 00:30:38,300 --> 00:30:41,795 No, you've got your peepers and you've got your non-peepers. 432 00:30:41,831 --> 00:30:46,734 CLEDUS: I'm definitely a non-peeper. But the car's a little weird. 433 00:30:47,392 --> 00:30:51,199 BUFORD: It's very important that a lawman has sixth sense. 434 00:30:51,236 --> 00:30:53,502 BUFORD: 'Cause then he can anticipate things... 435 00:30:53,539 --> 00:30:55,909 and prevent them from happening. 436 00:30:55,946 --> 00:30:58,751 Even a hound dog has sixth sense. 437 00:30:59,155 --> 00:31:02,743 MAMA TRUCKER: This is Mother Trucker in the Hawaiian Tropic, on a smokey watch. 438 00:31:02,784 --> 00:31:06,946 Hey, is that you, Bandit? Hey, you're looking good. 439 00:31:07,037 --> 00:31:10,039 CLEDUS: This is Bandit One calling. Is that Mama Trucker out there? 440 00:31:10,124 --> 00:31:12,184 Your phone's ringing. 441 00:31:12,335 --> 00:31:14,199 That's a big 10-4, Bandit. 442 00:31:14,236 --> 00:31:16,999 MAMA TRUCKER: We got smokey on our tail and he's moving fast. 443 00:31:17,090 --> 00:31:20,672 MAMA TRUCKER: You better come on in, honey. Your patch is ready, teddy. 444 00:31:20,760 --> 00:31:23,796 CLEDUS: I heard that. If you're ready, just hold it steady. 445 00:31:23,888 --> 00:31:26,286 I'm coming in. 446 00:31:28,893 --> 00:31:31,739 Cledus, what are we doing under here? 447 00:31:31,775 --> 00:31:34,027 Just getting out of the sun. 448 00:31:35,149 --> 00:31:39,051 Look who just drove by. My. Want to go fishing? 449 00:31:39,088 --> 00:31:41,276 - I'm game. - Let's go. 450 00:31:43,784 --> 00:31:45,859 [Upbeat country instrumental music] 451 00:31:50,791 --> 00:31:55,481 If some crime is going to be committed, I know it before they start to commit it. 452 00:31:55,567 --> 00:31:57,423 BUFORD: And I can put a stop to it. 453 00:31:57,459 --> 00:31:59,581 BUFORD: If somebody's going to do something to me... 454 00:31:59,675 --> 00:32:03,202 immediately, I know they're doing something to me. 455 00:32:03,345 --> 00:32:06,994 That is why you got to have a sixth sense. 456 00:32:07,558 --> 00:32:10,070 I'd rather have a dime. 457 00:32:13,272 --> 00:32:15,680 [Upbeat country instrumental music continues] 458 00:32:16,734 --> 00:32:18,593 Hi, boys! 459 00:32:19,027 --> 00:32:20,709 How do. 460 00:32:20,946 --> 00:32:22,357 Bye, boys! 461 00:32:23,366 --> 00:32:25,110 [Exclaims] 462 00:32:25,201 --> 00:32:28,596 It's The Bandit! Son of a bitch! 463 00:32:28,633 --> 00:32:30,155 And he's got my fish! 464 00:32:30,247 --> 00:32:35,648 As of this instant, Junior, we're in hot pursuit! 465 00:32:36,295 --> 00:32:38,750 [Fast-paced upbeat instrumental music] 466 00:32:45,658 --> 00:32:50,833 Look who we got down here. I guess we better chat with the old boy. 467 00:32:50,870 --> 00:32:54,636 You take this and just have yourself a conversation with Buford T. 468 00:32:54,731 --> 00:32:56,633 - Go ahead. Go. - What do I do? 469 00:32:56,669 --> 00:32:59,357 You just talk in it. Mash that little thing in and talk. 470 00:32:59,444 --> 00:33:02,129 DUSTY: Hello? Mr. Justice? 471 00:33:02,165 --> 00:33:04,762 DUSTY: How you folks doing down there? 472 00:33:04,798 --> 00:33:07,234 We're doing fine, little lady. 473 00:33:07,270 --> 00:33:11,613 And may I advise you that you're consorting with a criminal. 474 00:33:11,706 --> 00:33:15,242 So when he goes to the slammer, you go, too. 475 00:33:15,279 --> 00:33:16,585 Oh, really? 476 00:33:16,670 --> 00:33:21,140 While you're at it, why don't you take a big dump in your hat! 477 00:33:21,176 --> 00:33:23,075 Hold it! Watch that language. 478 00:33:23,111 --> 00:33:27,508 I happen to have my son in the car. Over and out. 479 00:33:27,681 --> 00:33:30,763 - Thank you, Daddy. - Shut up, shit. 480 00:33:31,852 --> 00:33:34,723 [Fast-paced upbeat instrumental music continues] 481 00:33:43,155 --> 00:33:46,770 BIG ENOS: Breaker, breaker, El Bandito, this is Muddy and Sunny. 482 00:33:46,807 --> 00:33:48,651 BIG ENOS: What's your 20? What's your story? 483 00:33:48,786 --> 00:33:51,075 You want to get that call? I'm a little busy. 484 00:33:51,163 --> 00:33:54,062 DUSTY: Yeah. Hello? 485 00:33:54,099 --> 00:33:58,086 Hello, boys! Yeah, this is the Bandit Mobile calling! 486 00:33:58,122 --> 00:34:01,165 DUSTY: The man here says you're going to get your shark before dark! 487 00:34:01,257 --> 00:34:04,658 Long as you don't get funny with the money. - Who's that? 488 00:34:04,677 --> 00:34:08,237 Probably some floozy he picked up by the side of the road. 489 00:34:09,056 --> 00:34:12,895 CLEDUS: Come on, Buford! Bring it on, brother! 490 00:34:17,523 --> 00:34:18,898 [Exclaims in approval] 491 00:34:19,442 --> 00:34:23,587 I sure wouldn't mind a romp in your melon patch. 492 00:34:23,740 --> 00:34:25,696 [Car engines roaring past] 493 00:34:26,658 --> 00:34:28,983 What the hell was that? 494 00:34:29,076 --> 00:34:32,363 Sorry, honey. I'll have to get back to you later. 495 00:34:32,748 --> 00:34:34,989 [Fast-paced instrumental music] 496 00:34:38,754 --> 00:34:40,581 [Police siren blaring] 497 00:34:47,138 --> 00:34:51,919 Excuse me, Sheriff. Why don't you just let me handle this situation here? 498 00:34:52,059 --> 00:34:55,643 Pardon me, young man, but you happen to be talking to... 499 00:34:55,730 --> 00:34:58,535 Sheriff Buford T. Justice... 500 00:34:58,607 --> 00:35:01,643 and I'm about to apprehend The Bandit. 501 00:35:01,735 --> 00:35:05,788 Cledus, you attract more fuzz than a fat man's navel. 502 00:35:05,824 --> 00:35:07,363 [Fast-paced instrumental music continues] 503 00:35:09,868 --> 00:35:13,238 I wouldn't give a rat's ass if you was J. Edgar Hoover... 504 00:35:13,414 --> 00:35:15,656 and he was Machine Gun Kelly. 505 00:35:15,750 --> 00:35:17,541 You're out of your jurisdiction. 506 00:35:17,627 --> 00:35:20,033 I might be out of my jurisdiction... 507 00:35:20,212 --> 00:35:24,866 but you're out of your league. Now back off! 508 00:35:25,927 --> 00:35:30,717 OFFICER: I ain't backing off of nothing, Sheriff. I'm taking charge! 509 00:35:31,140 --> 00:35:33,696 DUSTY: Boy, they're really coming. 510 00:35:33,935 --> 00:35:36,859 I'll tell you what. You just watch. Hang on. 511 00:35:37,605 --> 00:35:39,645 [Upbeat country song] 512 00:35:51,724 --> 00:35:54,573 Am I glad I came along on this trip. 513 00:36:44,048 --> 00:36:47,217 I'm surrounded by lunatics. 514 00:36:49,429 --> 00:36:51,966 [Upbeat country song continues] 515 00:36:58,772 --> 00:37:02,516 Sheriff? You might want to forget about losing me... 516 00:37:02,553 --> 00:37:04,894 'cause I'm here for the duration! 517 00:37:27,635 --> 00:37:29,094 [Officer screaming] 518 00:37:29,387 --> 00:37:30,666 OFFICER: Shit! 519 00:37:51,491 --> 00:37:53,888 Far out! 520 00:37:57,582 --> 00:38:01,972 Bandit? You're in a heap of trouble. 521 00:38:03,337 --> 00:38:05,137 Did you see that, Daddy? 522 00:38:05,174 --> 00:38:09,626 That's what happens when you lock horns with beautiful Buford. 523 00:38:14,557 --> 00:38:17,130 [Lively country instrumental music] 524 00:38:27,154 --> 00:38:30,732 Breaker for that Sandbox Man. How about you, Sandbox Man? 525 00:38:30,769 --> 00:38:33,781 The Bandit's ringing your phone, you copy? 526 00:38:33,910 --> 00:38:36,177 Hey, is that you, Bandit? 527 00:38:36,247 --> 00:38:38,796 Looks like you got Smokey on your tail! 528 00:38:38,832 --> 00:38:42,896 Right you are! He's kicking in my back door! Hello? 529 00:38:42,932 --> 00:38:45,470 Bring him by here! We'll take care of that! 530 00:38:45,507 --> 00:38:49,336 CLEDUS: I heard that. We're bringing it. Bye. 531 00:38:51,178 --> 00:38:53,669 [Lively country instrumental music continues] 532 00:38:55,182 --> 00:38:58,310 - Come on, Buford! - He won't give up, will he? 533 00:39:00,145 --> 00:39:02,850 [Lively country instrumental music continues] 534 00:39:13,492 --> 00:39:15,519 What did I tell you? 535 00:39:16,620 --> 00:39:21,892 You know what happens next, honey? Were gone. Bye, Buford! 536 00:39:30,593 --> 00:39:34,247 Gee, Daddy, this is just like being at the beach. 537 00:39:34,764 --> 00:39:38,110 It's a minor complication. 538 00:39:38,351 --> 00:39:43,393 Nothing's going to stop me from catching that big pile of dragon dump. 539 00:39:43,481 --> 00:39:45,189 And when I do... 540 00:39:45,275 --> 00:39:48,756 I'm going to marinate his walnuts. 541 00:39:49,446 --> 00:39:51,944 Get out and dust off the car. 542 00:39:51,991 --> 00:39:54,066 [Tyres screeching] 543 00:39:55,410 --> 00:39:57,907 I don't want to foul up your plans or anything... 544 00:39:57,996 --> 00:40:01,117 but I didn't get any breakfast this morning and I'm half-starved. 545 00:40:01,208 --> 00:40:04,742 Why don't we pull in up here and get us a pound of ground round... 546 00:40:04,836 --> 00:40:06,793 and put it down our neck. 547 00:40:06,880 --> 00:40:08,667 Sounds good. 548 00:40:13,636 --> 00:40:16,128 [Slow country instrumental music] 549 00:40:30,571 --> 00:40:34,644 CLEDUS: Listen. I think what we have here is a skull orchard. 550 00:40:34,680 --> 00:40:38,075 CLEDUS: Maybe you ought to stay here and let me get the cheeseburgers... 551 00:40:38,162 --> 00:40:41,489 'cause I'm not sure this is a place for ladies. Okay? 552 00:40:43,626 --> 00:40:47,613 DUSTY: Cledus, make those burgers rare. It'll go quicker. 553 00:40:52,594 --> 00:40:56,689 Nice looking set of wheels. How are you doing, my man? 554 00:40:57,014 --> 00:40:59,989 Yeah. Question's too hard, I guess. 555 00:41:00,394 --> 00:41:03,832 Rare, Cledus. Make them real rare, okay? 556 00:41:03,854 --> 00:41:06,392 Rare. She wants it rare? I'm going to get it so rare... 557 00:41:06,482 --> 00:41:08,939 a good vet. could have it on its feet in 15 minutes. 558 00:41:09,027 --> 00:41:11,234 What do you think? 559 00:41:12,447 --> 00:41:14,818 I didn't mean to wake you up. 560 00:41:20,956 --> 00:41:23,534 MAN: So long, cowboy! 561 00:41:30,924 --> 00:41:33,404 Was that with or without onions? 562 00:41:33,440 --> 00:41:35,193 Onions. 563 00:41:35,345 --> 00:41:38,622 With onions. Yeah, with onions. 564 00:41:38,724 --> 00:41:41,298 Be right back. Yes, sir. 565 00:41:42,145 --> 00:41:43,604 [People exclaim] 566 00:41:44,980 --> 00:41:46,522 [Cledus groaning] 567 00:41:46,732 --> 00:41:51,216 We didn't discuss this earlier, but do you want a large, small, or medium drink? 568 00:41:51,253 --> 00:41:53,852 - Extra large. - Extra large. 569 00:41:54,239 --> 00:41:56,099 Be right back. 570 00:41:57,701 --> 00:41:59,825 [Cledus grunting and groaning] 571 00:42:04,333 --> 00:42:06,789 MAN: Go get him, Jimmy! 572 00:42:07,670 --> 00:42:10,458 CLEDUS: Well, I guess we ruined your whole day didn't we? 573 00:42:10,548 --> 00:42:13,466 How about some onion rings, honey? They got- 574 00:42:13,551 --> 00:42:15,010 [Furniture crashing] 575 00:42:18,139 --> 00:42:20,428 See? And you remember- 576 00:42:28,295 --> 00:42:32,400 Let that be a lesson to you. They're sacking them up right now. 577 00:42:32,863 --> 00:42:34,800 MAN 1: Get him! CLEDUS: Thank you, my man. 578 00:42:37,179 --> 00:42:38,314 MAN 2: What an animal! 579 00:42:38,472 --> 00:42:39,821 CLEDUS: See you. 580 00:42:41,372 --> 00:42:43,910 One cheeseburger for the lady. 581 00:42:45,708 --> 00:42:49,162 CLEDUS: Well, all right, my man. Thank you. 582 00:42:49,838 --> 00:42:52,802 DUSTY: Hey, Cledus, you forgot the mustard. 583 00:42:53,008 --> 00:42:57,362 CLEDUS: I forgot the mustard. Women. Sit down. 584 00:42:58,222 --> 00:43:02,537 CLEDUS: Me and you gone, like a big caboose. 585 00:43:02,560 --> 00:43:04,866 CLEDUS: See you! 586 00:43:06,647 --> 00:43:07,927 [Tyres screeching] 587 00:43:13,696 --> 00:43:16,512 Breaker, breaker, Mr. Bandit. 588 00:43:16,657 --> 00:43:19,065 You might as well give up the ghost. 589 00:43:19,285 --> 00:43:23,955 'Cause I'm staying with you like stink on a skunk. 590 00:43:24,020 --> 00:43:25,874 Here he comes. 591 00:43:25,958 --> 00:43:27,950 JUNIOR: We got him now, Daddy. 592 00:43:29,003 --> 00:43:31,162 [Fast-paced country instrumental music] 593 00:43:31,715 --> 00:43:33,921 DUSTY: Watch out for those eggs! 594 00:43:39,514 --> 00:43:41,886 We almost scrambled some eggs back there. 595 00:43:41,975 --> 00:43:45,225 Well, see, I was hoping for a Buford omelette. 596 00:43:46,687 --> 00:43:49,144 [Fast-paced country instrumental music continues] 597 00:43:56,614 --> 00:43:58,061 We lost him. 598 00:43:58,074 --> 00:44:02,696 Talent and pure intelligence will always triumph over ignorance- 599 00:44:02,788 --> 00:44:03,533 [Car horn honking] 600 00:44:04,539 --> 00:44:07,113 [Fast-paced country instrumental music continues] 601 00:44:09,294 --> 00:44:11,926 He may be dumb, but he ain't scared. 602 00:44:18,303 --> 00:44:20,130 MAN: Oh, dang it! 603 00:44:24,769 --> 00:44:26,096 MAN: Not again! 604 00:44:35,113 --> 00:44:38,925 - He's still coming! - I'm going as fast as I can! 605 00:44:41,285 --> 00:44:43,777 JUNIOR: You should've turned right, Daddy. 606 00:44:49,919 --> 00:44:53,428 FLORIST: My flowers! Look what they did to my flowers. 607 00:45:01,973 --> 00:45:05,010 [Fast-paced country instrumental music continues] 608 00:45:20,783 --> 00:45:22,159 [Cledus chuckles] 609 00:45:23,183 --> 00:45:24,402 God! 610 00:45:29,334 --> 00:45:33,124 What the hell are you trying to do, you homicidal idiot? 611 00:45:33,172 --> 00:45:35,793 Back up and get the hell out of here! 612 00:45:35,883 --> 00:45:38,290 It's kind of a tight alley. I'm gonna need some help. 613 00:45:38,385 --> 00:45:41,376 - No problem. I'll direct you. - If you say so. 614 00:45:41,412 --> 00:45:43,588 Okay, back up. 615 00:45:45,350 --> 00:45:48,304 That's it. You're in the clear here. 616 00:45:49,563 --> 00:45:52,190 You're in the clear there. 617 00:45:52,232 --> 00:45:54,606 Keep going. You're in the clear. 618 00:45:56,988 --> 00:45:58,529 BUFORD: Clear on this side. 619 00:45:58,614 --> 00:46:01,152 BUFORD: Clear on that side. Clear on- 620 00:46:01,241 --> 00:46:03,275 JUNIOR: Daddy? BUFORD: Shut up! 621 00:46:03,745 --> 00:46:06,746 BUFORD: Clear on this side. Back it up there. 622 00:46:07,082 --> 00:46:09,412 - But, Daddy! - Shut up, shit! 623 00:46:09,500 --> 00:46:12,441 You're all clear now. Whip on out. 624 00:46:17,384 --> 00:46:21,718 Now, do you see, what you did with your "Daddy. " 625 00:46:22,013 --> 00:46:24,848 JUNIOR: But, Daddy, look! 626 00:46:27,851 --> 00:46:31,538 Hold it! 627 00:46:32,065 --> 00:46:34,603 Just what are you trying to do, nice lady? 628 00:46:34,734 --> 00:46:37,618 I'm about to tow this car to the garage. 629 00:46:37,779 --> 00:46:40,158 And may I inquire why? 630 00:46:40,195 --> 00:46:43,110 It's parked illegally and creating a fire hazard. 631 00:46:43,201 --> 00:46:45,527 And it's one big piece of crap. 632 00:46:45,621 --> 00:46:51,007 May I say, madam, that you are talking to Buford T. Justice. 633 00:46:51,043 --> 00:46:54,568 I wouldn't care if you were Sugar Ray Leonard. 634 00:46:55,297 --> 00:46:57,705 COP: Come on, Charlie, let's pull out. 635 00:46:57,800 --> 00:47:00,524 You woman's lib sumbitch. 636 00:47:02,513 --> 00:47:04,838 BUFORD: Get up there and unhook it. 637 00:47:10,688 --> 00:47:13,860 BUFORD: Unhook it! I'm putting it in reverse! 638 00:47:13,899 --> 00:47:16,878 It's too heavy, Daddy. 639 00:47:18,778 --> 00:47:24,216 I can't get any traction. Unhook it. I'm gonna give it all it's got! 640 00:47:30,207 --> 00:47:34,839 - Oh, shit, Charlie! He's getting away. - No, he's not. 641 00:47:35,296 --> 00:47:37,687 COP: Get that sucker off! 642 00:47:38,591 --> 00:47:41,296 [Fast-paced country instrumental music] 643 00:47:45,641 --> 00:47:48,244 JUNIOR: Wait, Daddy! Wait for me! 644 00:47:49,373 --> 00:47:52,223 JUNIOR: I'm right behind you. Don't leave me. 645 00:47:52,480 --> 00:47:54,268 JUNIOR: Wait, Daddy. 646 00:47:57,590 --> 00:48:00,523 JUNIOR: Wait, Daddy. Wait for me, Daddy. 647 00:48:02,991 --> 00:48:05,150 I'm getting dizzy, Daddy. 648 00:48:08,455 --> 00:48:10,072 Wait, Daddy. 649 00:48:10,457 --> 00:48:12,284 [Car horns blaring] 650 00:48:13,335 --> 00:48:16,704 WOMAN: Look! You were going so fast! MAN: I'm sorry. 651 00:48:16,797 --> 00:48:19,909 WOMAN: You came around the corner here, I couldn't get out of the way. 652 00:48:19,925 --> 00:48:23,175 WOMAN: Young man, how old are you? COP: Are you all right, ma'am? 653 00:48:23,261 --> 00:48:24,886 WOMAN: I'm trying to look at my car! 654 00:48:24,971 --> 00:48:26,846 WOMAN: Do you know who my husband is? 655 00:48:26,933 --> 00:48:28,807 JUNIOR: Hold it, Daddy. 656 00:48:28,893 --> 00:48:31,346 JUNIOR: I think I'm falling. 657 00:48:35,608 --> 00:48:38,479 [Fast-paced country instrumental music continues] 658 00:48:51,498 --> 00:48:53,456 [Tyres screeching] 659 00:49:02,927 --> 00:49:06,940 Well, nice lady, it looks like we meet again. 660 00:49:06,977 --> 00:49:09,991 COP: Would you please call a tow truck? 661 00:49:10,268 --> 00:49:13,752 Not if you were Sugar Ray Leonard. 662 00:49:14,147 --> 00:49:17,850 BUFORD: Would you look around in that junk and see if my son's in there? 663 00:49:18,569 --> 00:49:20,145 Here I am, Daddy. 664 00:49:20,236 --> 00:49:23,646 Would you stop playing with your coconuts and get in the car? 665 00:49:23,656 --> 00:49:24,857 Okay. 666 00:49:26,368 --> 00:49:28,028 [Junior crashing on the ground] 667 00:49:38,088 --> 00:49:42,786 ANNOUNCER: Okay, folks, we welcome you all to the Joie Chitwood Thrill Show. 668 00:49:42,822 --> 00:49:45,298 We're readying the wall of fire right now. 669 00:49:45,387 --> 00:49:47,676 There are thrills and chills galore. 670 00:49:47,765 --> 00:49:50,800 And as the wall of fire is getting ready- 671 00:49:50,975 --> 00:49:52,554 [Car horn honking] 672 00:49:53,229 --> 00:49:55,767 ANNOUNCER: The crowd's really getting excited at this point. 673 00:49:55,856 --> 00:49:58,526 I don't blame them one bit. Wait a minute! 674 00:49:58,609 --> 00:50:00,602 I think we've got a surprise visitor. 675 00:50:00,694 --> 00:50:04,941 Yes, we've got The Bandit making a guest appearance here... 676 00:50:05,016 --> 00:50:08,076 at the Joie Chitwood Thrill Show. 677 00:50:08,870 --> 00:50:10,329 [Crowd cheering] 678 00:50:10,830 --> 00:50:13,285 - Where are we, Daddy? - Indianapolis. 679 00:50:13,374 --> 00:50:15,413 How the hell do I know where we are? 680 00:50:23,801 --> 00:50:27,646 - Daddy, I'm scared. - I know. I can smell it. 681 00:50:27,847 --> 00:50:30,635 ANNOUNCER: And right into a couple of demolition cars there. 682 00:50:30,725 --> 00:50:34,099 Buford Justice, coming around behind The Bandit. 683 00:50:35,397 --> 00:50:37,603 [Fast-paced instrumental music] 684 00:50:39,443 --> 00:50:42,372 The nuthouse must be having a picnic! 685 00:50:43,655 --> 00:50:46,193 - Look out, Daddy. - Don't tell me to look out! 686 00:50:46,283 --> 00:50:49,487 - Tell them to look out! - Look out! 687 00:50:49,619 --> 00:50:52,953 ANNOUNCER: Four tough guys out there. 688 00:50:57,794 --> 00:50:59,704 Listen to those people! 689 00:50:59,797 --> 00:51:02,466 They think I did that on purpose. They love me! 690 00:51:02,549 --> 00:51:05,087 Hi there! Hey, you all! 691 00:51:07,220 --> 00:51:09,943 Cledus. We got to go. 692 00:51:09,979 --> 00:51:12,549 - My people! - We gotta go. Bye! 693 00:51:13,080 --> 00:51:14,804 ANNOUNCER: Here we go! 694 00:51:22,235 --> 00:51:24,229 BUFORD: What the hell is happening? 695 00:51:24,322 --> 00:51:27,115 Climb out the window, Junior, and weigh the car down. 696 00:51:27,152 --> 00:51:28,408 JUNIOR: Yes, Daddy. 697 00:51:34,999 --> 00:51:38,913 - There's lots of people out here. - Well, push, Junior, push! 698 00:51:39,003 --> 00:51:40,118 Damn! 699 00:51:40,213 --> 00:51:43,083 I'm trying, Daddy. My foot's stuck. 700 00:51:43,174 --> 00:51:45,499 I'll release it. 701 00:51:46,761 --> 00:51:50,609 BUFORD: You're killing your daddy! 702 00:51:51,809 --> 00:51:54,204 Get back in the damn car! 703 00:51:54,435 --> 00:51:56,160 Yes, Daddy. 704 00:51:56,771 --> 00:51:59,477 ANNOUNCER: They ain't coming down. I think they- 705 00:52:01,860 --> 00:52:04,773 Tell them to get out of my way! I'm coming through! 706 00:52:04,809 --> 00:52:08,357 JUNIOR: He's getting awful close. Straighten out. 707 00:52:09,493 --> 00:52:12,068 Daddy, we're going into a big hole. 708 00:52:12,104 --> 00:52:14,366 BUFORD: Hole, hell! That's a cannon! 709 00:52:26,552 --> 00:52:29,342 What the heck is all this? 710 00:52:29,388 --> 00:52:31,427 Well, the bridge is out. 711 00:52:31,765 --> 00:52:34,153 Well, what do you think The Bandit would do? 712 00:52:34,184 --> 00:52:37,933 He'd just jump it. See, but The Bandit will jump anything. 713 00:52:38,021 --> 00:52:41,024 Get it? But I ain't interested in jumping no river... 714 00:52:41,109 --> 00:52:43,350 I wanna go to sleep. I'm tired. 715 00:52:43,444 --> 00:52:46,468 - I saw a motel right down the road. - Can you find it? 716 00:52:46,505 --> 00:52:49,083 - Sure can. - We are gone. 717 00:52:55,497 --> 00:52:57,455 BIG ENOS: Well, good job! 718 00:52:57,542 --> 00:53:01,376 BIG ENOS: You gotta try and do the same thing when the sheriff gets here. 719 00:53:01,413 --> 00:53:04,004 That won't be hard, on account of Sheriff Justice has only got... 720 00:53:04,089 --> 00:53:06,511 a child's portion of intellect. 721 00:53:06,548 --> 00:53:10,063 BIG ENOS: Come on! This is gonna be a ton of fun, son. 722 00:53:10,100 --> 00:53:11,882 Pleasure doing business with you! 723 00:53:14,434 --> 00:53:17,537 CLEDUS: Okay! Your turn. 724 00:53:19,147 --> 00:53:20,689 [Toilet flushing] 725 00:53:20,773 --> 00:53:22,602 I didn't wash the fish. 726 00:53:22,693 --> 00:53:24,566 Left you... 727 00:53:24,778 --> 00:53:26,742 plenty of hot water. 728 00:53:26,821 --> 00:53:28,861 Come on, here. 729 00:53:28,948 --> 00:53:31,695 $250,000 boy! 730 00:53:31,869 --> 00:53:33,861 I'll get you to... 731 00:53:35,247 --> 00:53:36,926 Yeah, okay. 732 00:53:36,963 --> 00:53:38,866 [Shower running] 733 00:53:40,482 --> 00:53:43,120 I'll buy Fred a... 734 00:53:43,671 --> 00:53:47,915 This is a strange thing. 735 00:53:53,932 --> 00:53:56,220 This is... Oh. 736 00:53:56,394 --> 00:53:58,552 CLEDUS: Oh. Well. 737 00:53:59,730 --> 00:54:01,272 [Tyres screeching] 738 00:54:05,820 --> 00:54:09,132 JUNIOR: What is it, Daddy? BUFORD: There's The Bandit's car. 739 00:54:09,198 --> 00:54:12,595 BUFORD: He probably checked in to the motel with that broad. 740 00:54:12,597 --> 00:54:14,201 And he's got the fish with him. 741 00:54:14,286 --> 00:54:17,786 Now, when he's fooling around and thinking of other things... 742 00:54:17,873 --> 00:54:21,862 BUFORD: we can snatch the fish. JUNIOR: Thinking of what other things? 743 00:54:21,988 --> 00:54:25,420 BUFORD: You're getting to me. Just play with your crayons. 744 00:54:28,259 --> 00:54:31,629 [Fast-paced rock music playing] 745 00:54:33,014 --> 00:54:37,500 Daddy, we just walked by a penicillin dispenser. 746 00:54:37,602 --> 00:54:43,225 Yeah. I feel like the guest of honour at a crabs convention. 747 00:54:45,568 --> 00:54:48,321 I'm on the floor. 748 00:54:50,115 --> 00:54:52,404 CLEDUS: I'm on the floor. 749 00:54:56,121 --> 00:54:59,734 You be sure to turn out the lights, now, when you come in here, right? 750 00:54:59,770 --> 00:55:01,936 DUSTY: Right. CLEDUS: Yes, ma'am. 751 00:55:05,005 --> 00:55:07,050 CLEDUS: Good night. 752 00:55:11,094 --> 00:55:14,651 What the hell is this, another raid? I paid the Captain two nights ago! 753 00:55:14,745 --> 00:55:16,286 This isn't a raid. 754 00:55:16,370 --> 00:55:20,925 I'm here on official business. I'm going to make an investigation. 755 00:55:20,962 --> 00:55:24,410 Now you just go ahead and read your Gonad Gazette. 756 00:55:27,361 --> 00:55:28,985 DUSTY: And here we are in a motel... 757 00:55:29,071 --> 00:55:31,397 with nothing but a few potted plants between us... 758 00:55:31,491 --> 00:55:33,964 but I know I don't have to worry one bit. 759 00:55:34,000 --> 00:55:36,300 No, Cledus, I know you're the kind of man... 760 00:55:36,336 --> 00:55:37,489 who has the kind of character... 761 00:55:37,579 --> 00:55:40,834 who does not hop into bed with just anybody. 762 00:55:42,668 --> 00:55:44,957 Right, Cledus? 763 00:55:45,129 --> 00:55:46,458 [Cledus snoring] 764 00:55:56,307 --> 00:55:58,885 Oh, no, you don't! 765 00:56:02,855 --> 00:56:05,229 [Suspenseful instrumental music] 766 00:56:16,953 --> 00:56:19,111 [Fast-paced rock music] 767 00:56:27,297 --> 00:56:29,041 - Who's in there, Daddy? - I don't know... 768 00:56:29,133 --> 00:56:31,564 but it's not Jacques Cousteau. 769 00:56:37,349 --> 00:56:40,997 - What's going on? - Some kind of union meeting. 770 00:56:48,736 --> 00:56:51,737 Get away from there before you get a herpes on you. 771 00:56:53,073 --> 00:56:55,825 Daddy. Like you said. 772 00:56:56,493 --> 00:56:58,819 LITTLE ENOS: Make a wish. 773 00:56:58,913 --> 00:57:00,323 Yeah! 774 00:57:00,414 --> 00:57:02,192 Oh, geez! 775 00:57:02,959 --> 00:57:04,999 Oh! 776 00:57:05,337 --> 00:57:06,830 [Men murmuring] 777 00:57:07,421 --> 00:57:09,208 Oh, no boys. 778 00:57:09,245 --> 00:57:12,632 BIG ENOS: Leave my daughter alone! LITTLE ENOS: What's the rubber glove for? 779 00:57:12,719 --> 00:57:15,175 BIG ENOS: You let my daughter alone! 780 00:57:16,805 --> 00:57:21,481 Daddy, there's a fish that looks exactly like our fish! 781 00:57:24,147 --> 00:57:29,150 That is our fish, you moose twit! Grab it! 782 00:57:32,280 --> 00:57:34,902 [Fast-paced rock music continues] 783 00:57:37,077 --> 00:57:41,154 Hey, making it with a fish! 784 00:57:41,190 --> 00:57:43,422 Crazy! 785 00:57:46,504 --> 00:57:50,813 BUFORD: Just like the Bible says, Sodom and Gomorrah. 786 00:57:57,431 --> 00:57:59,131 BUFORD: The Bandit! 787 00:57:59,224 --> 00:58:03,680 We can kill two possums with one rock. Come on. 788 00:58:10,862 --> 00:58:13,187 [Fast-paced rock music continues] 789 00:58:18,953 --> 00:58:22,304 BUFORD: I got you. HOOKER: I got you. 790 00:58:23,124 --> 00:58:26,825 Now, wait a minute, ma'am. What the hell are you doing in there... 791 00:58:26,920 --> 00:58:29,126 all dressed up with a cowboy hat on? 792 00:58:29,213 --> 00:58:32,962 I'm getting all hot and bothered for the evening, darling. 793 00:58:34,469 --> 00:58:36,795 - Come along with me. - You got it! 794 00:58:37,389 --> 00:58:41,436 - Give me the key, Junior. - I left it in the car. 795 00:58:41,768 --> 00:58:46,379 - You left the key in the car? - If I keep it with me, I might lose it. 796 00:58:46,416 --> 00:58:48,622 We gotta stay hooked up for a little while longer. 797 00:58:48,659 --> 00:58:50,475 This is getting- 798 00:58:53,301 --> 00:58:55,488 Good heavens. 799 00:58:56,909 --> 00:58:58,491 We can't get out that way. 800 00:58:58,576 --> 00:59:01,410 There must be some other way out of this joint. 801 00:59:01,455 --> 00:59:03,867 Maybe there's a window in the bathroom. 802 00:59:03,903 --> 00:59:05,272 BUFORD: Let's find out. 803 00:59:07,878 --> 00:59:11,631 HOOKER: Wait will you! My hat! BUFORD: The hell with the hat. 804 00:59:11,632 --> 00:59:15,006 Just perfect. Open up the window a little bit. 805 00:59:17,262 --> 00:59:19,136 [Buford screaming] 806 00:59:19,389 --> 00:59:23,501 BUFORD: You're pulling my arm off! HOOKER: I can't help it, darling! 807 00:59:23,537 --> 00:59:27,634 All right, get on your back. Turn around and get on your back. 808 00:59:27,774 --> 00:59:29,315 BUFORD: That's it. 809 00:59:30,067 --> 00:59:32,594 BUFORD: Now start to wiggle out. 810 00:59:32,861 --> 00:59:35,567 BUFORD: That's it, wiggle. Keep wiggling. 811 00:59:35,657 --> 00:59:39,485 I can't do it unless you come with me, darling. 812 00:59:39,701 --> 00:59:42,229 Will you get out of the way? 813 00:59:46,960 --> 00:59:48,998 BUFORD: I can't- 814 00:59:51,747 --> 00:59:53,700 BUFORD: God! JUNIOR: Mama's not gonna like this. 815 00:59:53,758 --> 00:59:58,687 Junior! Open the window up and give me a push! 816 00:59:58,722 --> 01:00:00,714 [Buford screaming] 817 01:00:05,520 --> 01:00:07,762 All clear, Daddy? 818 01:00:07,939 --> 01:00:10,015 Good. Here comes the fish! 819 01:00:10,275 --> 01:00:11,769 [Buford groans] 820 01:00:16,866 --> 01:00:20,284 JUNIOR: Daddy, I think I should get the key now. 821 01:00:20,320 --> 01:00:22,040 No shit. 822 01:00:22,704 --> 01:00:25,161 BIG ENOS: Come on, we gotta get out of here. 823 01:00:25,249 --> 01:00:27,456 Watch out for that guy with the- 824 01:00:27,543 --> 01:00:29,700 Oh, we gotta get out of this! 825 01:00:29,794 --> 01:00:32,359 I'm sorry things didn't turn out the way we expected. 826 01:00:32,396 --> 01:00:34,961 - Especially you getting the big guy. - Don't talk to me. 827 01:00:35,051 --> 01:00:37,126 - What's the matter? - I'm trying to remember his number. 828 01:00:37,261 --> 01:00:40,717 We got to get out of these dresses and get back to business. 829 01:00:40,753 --> 01:00:44,893 Let's see, was it 555-1414? 830 01:00:45,269 --> 01:00:49,472 BIG ENOS: Okay. LITTLE ENOS: Or 555-4141? 831 01:00:49,856 --> 01:00:51,399 [Pleasant country song] 832 01:00:54,526 --> 01:00:59,197 You're killing your daddy! Get in the damn car! 833 01:00:59,368 --> 01:01:02,906 LITTLE ENOS: 555-1415? 834 01:01:07,459 --> 01:01:11,195 Just slide it in and come in after it. 835 01:01:14,507 --> 01:01:17,127 Take that fish out of my mouth! 836 01:01:18,136 --> 01:01:20,887 Just slide it- God damn it! 837 01:01:20,971 --> 01:01:23,242 Let me have it! 838 01:01:25,269 --> 01:01:27,261 BUFORD: Now close the door. 839 01:01:27,729 --> 01:01:29,010 [Buford screams in pain] 840 01:01:33,485 --> 01:01:35,229 Very nice, Junior. 841 01:01:35,362 --> 01:01:37,189 That was very nice. 842 01:01:37,447 --> 01:01:40,069 You know, when this is all over... 843 01:01:40,366 --> 01:01:43,565 I'm gonna buy you a nice lobotomy. 844 01:01:43,912 --> 01:01:45,027 Thank you, Daddy! 845 01:01:45,831 --> 01:01:47,989 [Pleasant country song continues] 846 01:02:00,324 --> 01:02:04,136 Come on, let's give him a taste of the old Enos devil darts. 847 01:02:05,475 --> 01:02:08,141 These suckers are deadlier than your breath. 848 01:02:08,229 --> 01:02:11,312 BIG ENOS: Here they come. Get ready. 849 01:02:15,111 --> 01:02:16,190 [Tyres screeching] 850 01:02:16,279 --> 01:02:20,270 Done like a true pygmy! 851 01:02:21,908 --> 01:02:25,050 LITTLE ENOS: Great! BIG ENOS: That'll be a 20-minute delay. 852 01:02:25,142 --> 01:02:26,829 LITTLE ENOS: Yeah, at least. 853 01:02:31,710 --> 01:02:33,825 I'm really sorry about that fish, Cledus... 854 01:02:33,861 --> 01:02:36,801 but I had no idea there were fish robbers in the area. 855 01:02:36,837 --> 01:02:40,166 What if The Bandit had lost the fish? What would he do? 856 01:02:40,471 --> 01:02:44,218 - The Bandit would get it back. - That's what we're gonna do. 857 01:02:44,307 --> 01:02:46,015 JUNIOR: It's flat, Daddy. 858 01:02:47,685 --> 01:02:50,495 Flatter than your mama's chest. 859 01:02:54,442 --> 01:02:57,972 - It's flat, too, Daddy. - I know that, you pig bladder! 860 01:02:58,364 --> 01:03:03,781 Well, let's see if we can find a nice citizen with a couple of tyres. 861 01:03:10,000 --> 01:03:13,000 What does that look like down there on top of that car? 862 01:03:13,086 --> 01:03:15,375 DUSTY: Looks like a fish to me. 863 01:03:15,506 --> 01:03:18,883 Told you The Bandit always gets his fish. 864 01:03:19,927 --> 01:03:22,548 [Pleasant country song resumes] 865 01:03:23,180 --> 01:03:26,715 Where are you, Justice when we need you the most 866 01:03:28,144 --> 01:03:31,727 Where are you, Justice when we need you the most 867 01:03:34,650 --> 01:03:36,159 Listen. 868 01:03:37,319 --> 01:03:39,776 I'm going to get the fish while Buford's gone. 869 01:03:39,865 --> 01:03:43,695 Now, be ready to get out of here real quick. I'll be right back. 870 01:03:47,496 --> 01:03:49,953 [Cledus laughing] 871 01:03:50,625 --> 01:03:53,459 - What did I tell you? - You got him. 872 01:03:53,544 --> 01:03:55,537 Well, when The Bandit goes fishing... 873 01:03:55,629 --> 01:03:57,251 The Bandit goes fishing. 874 01:03:57,341 --> 01:03:58,714 Put this down in there. 875 01:04:02,095 --> 01:04:04,873 Daddy, our fish is gone! 876 01:04:08,060 --> 01:04:11,678 Well, I guess that yanks my chain. 877 01:04:11,855 --> 01:04:14,409 Junior, it's hopeless. 878 01:04:14,441 --> 01:04:15,769 What do you mean, Daddy? 879 01:04:15,859 --> 01:04:20,380 I can't believe that it all ends like this... 880 01:04:20,572 --> 01:04:23,312 that this is my last hot pursuit... 881 01:04:23,349 --> 01:04:29,298 all on account of a couple of lousy flat tyres and a fish that flew the coop. 882 01:04:29,706 --> 01:04:32,079 Is he gonna be shocked. Listen. 883 01:04:32,168 --> 01:04:35,461 I'm saying that it's time to pee on the fire... 884 01:04:35,565 --> 01:04:39,152 call in the dogs, turn off my siren... 885 01:04:39,342 --> 01:04:41,334 switch off my lights... 886 01:04:41,802 --> 01:04:45,493 and return to my old rocking chair. 887 01:04:45,529 --> 01:04:48,178 Daddy, you mean I won't be... 888 01:04:48,267 --> 01:04:51,304 your little tick turd anymore? 889 01:04:51,562 --> 01:04:53,353 [Junior sniffling] 890 01:04:54,856 --> 01:04:58,964 Son, you'll always be my tick turd. 891 01:05:00,697 --> 01:05:03,103 CLEDUS: Do you believe that? 892 01:05:06,160 --> 01:05:08,335 I love you, Daddy... 893 01:05:08,579 --> 01:05:11,746 even if you can't catch the bad guys anymore... 894 01:05:12,125 --> 01:05:16,383 even if you're a total failure and the laughingstock of Texas... 895 01:05:16,419 --> 01:05:20,626 even if Little Enos is gonna get your badge. I don't care. I still- 896 01:05:20,717 --> 01:05:23,484 Shut up, you barrel of monkey nuts! 897 01:05:23,553 --> 01:05:28,421 Nobody gets the badge of Sheriff Buford T. Justice! 898 01:05:29,268 --> 01:05:30,892 [Cheerful country instrumental music] 899 01:05:30,978 --> 01:05:34,581 - Hi, babycakes! - The return of Frankenstein. 900 01:05:34,618 --> 01:05:36,929 JUNIOR: Daddy, it's The Bandit! 901 01:05:41,989 --> 01:05:43,399 BUFORD: Get in the car, Junior. 902 01:05:43,490 --> 01:05:46,942 I don't need any tyres to catch that box of manure! 903 01:05:47,035 --> 01:05:49,703 But, Bu, what about me? 904 01:05:49,913 --> 01:05:54,233 I'm interested in pursuit, not party time. 905 01:05:59,340 --> 01:06:02,293 [Fast-paced country instrumental music] 906 01:06:12,520 --> 01:06:17,100 HOOKER: Bu Baby! BUFORD: I told you, you flying flamingo... 907 01:06:17,191 --> 01:06:19,314 my name is not Bu Baby! 908 01:06:19,401 --> 01:06:22,023 - It's Buford T- - Shut up! 909 01:06:22,113 --> 01:06:25,149 BUFORD: I got a felon in front of me, a fool in the family... 910 01:06:25,240 --> 01:06:28,583 and a giant nymphomaniac on the roof. 911 01:06:29,120 --> 01:06:32,835 The burden of it all is dragging my ass. 912 01:06:32,874 --> 01:06:37,861 I love it when you talk dirty, darling! Oh, baby! 913 01:06:41,383 --> 01:06:43,790 COWBOY: Move it, little dogies. 914 01:06:48,640 --> 01:06:52,720 JUNIOR: Daddy, look at all the cattle. What if we hit one? 915 01:06:52,811 --> 01:06:56,191 He gets to be a Big Mac ahead of all the others. 916 01:06:56,502 --> 01:06:59,103 JUNIOR: Are those real cowboys, Daddy? 917 01:07:00,944 --> 01:07:03,581 JUNIOR: Look out for the baby cow, Daddy. 918 01:07:04,323 --> 01:07:06,362 [Slow country instrumental music] 919 01:07:11,998 --> 01:07:16,615 BIG ENOS: We gave them a bum steer. LITTLE ENOS: There's only two hours left. 920 01:07:16,652 --> 01:07:18,831 BIG ENOS: Come on, we got to get to the ranch. 921 01:07:18,962 --> 01:07:21,335 DUSTY: Boy, we're lost now. CLEDUS: We're not lost! 922 01:07:21,757 --> 01:07:23,916 Well, where are we going? 923 01:07:25,135 --> 01:07:28,636 - Down this road. - Oh. Okay. 924 01:07:36,897 --> 01:07:39,104 [Upbeat country instrumental music] 925 01:07:44,614 --> 01:07:47,498 Cledus, looks like "down this road" was a dead end. 926 01:07:47,534 --> 01:07:51,482 Not if you can drive a boat, it ain't. Watch this. 927 01:08:05,344 --> 01:08:07,382 You stay here and watch the evidence. 928 01:08:07,470 --> 01:08:11,650 When I grab his ass, it's gonna be the gravy on my grits. 929 01:08:12,726 --> 01:08:14,683 JUNIOR: Oops! I'm sorry, ma'am. 930 01:08:14,770 --> 01:08:16,602 BUFORD: Out of my way! 931 01:08:17,021 --> 01:08:19,347 BUFORD: Out of my way! MAN: Hey! 932 01:08:22,069 --> 01:08:26,163 That's what you get for obstructing justice. 933 01:08:27,199 --> 01:08:31,953 - Follow that sumbitch! - Yes, sir. You're the boss. 934 01:08:33,038 --> 01:08:35,791 BUFORD: My groin! 935 01:08:35,917 --> 01:08:38,512 You're grinding my groin! 936 01:08:39,169 --> 01:08:40,544 Bu Baby! 937 01:08:40,712 --> 01:08:42,835 [Heroic instrumental music] 938 01:08:44,133 --> 01:08:46,007 [Adventurous country instrumental music] 939 01:08:46,094 --> 01:08:47,801 HOOKER: My baby! Bu! 940 01:08:49,221 --> 01:08:50,466 HOOKER: Bu! 941 01:08:54,269 --> 01:08:55,914 Come on, Buford! 942 01:08:55,951 --> 01:08:57,517 Turn right! 943 01:09:01,109 --> 01:09:03,303 I got him now! 944 01:09:05,029 --> 01:09:08,231 [Adventurous country instrumental music continues] 945 01:09:10,910 --> 01:09:13,368 Look out! He's a maniac! 946 01:09:18,334 --> 01:09:20,208 Bring it on, brother! 947 01:09:20,545 --> 01:09:23,923 Are you sure you know what the hell you're doing? 948 01:09:23,965 --> 01:09:27,548 BUFORD: Shit! MAN: Sorry about that. 949 01:09:30,346 --> 01:09:31,840 Hi! 950 01:09:33,141 --> 01:09:36,012 - Oh, hi. - We're having a picnic over there... 951 01:09:36,270 --> 01:09:41,530 - and if you'd like, feel free to join us. - I'd sure like to. But I can't. 952 01:09:41,691 --> 01:09:45,440 Oh, well, if you change your mind, just come on over. 953 01:09:45,529 --> 01:09:49,417 See, my daddy said I had to stay right here and keep an eye on... 954 01:09:50,033 --> 01:09:51,362 things. 955 01:09:52,870 --> 01:09:55,443 [Adventurous country instrumental music continues] 956 01:10:04,048 --> 01:10:08,089 Holy shit! 957 01:10:26,112 --> 01:10:29,317 Oh, mama, we gone! 958 01:10:29,615 --> 01:10:32,828 - Nice going, Cledus. - I'm telling you. Here he comes! 959 01:10:37,291 --> 01:10:39,934 - Follow him! - This boat won't do that. 960 01:10:39,970 --> 01:10:44,350 Don't argue with the law! Follow that sumbitch! 961 01:10:44,547 --> 01:10:46,540 Okay, you asked for it. 962 01:10:51,138 --> 01:10:53,510 [Buford screaming] 963 01:10:59,521 --> 01:11:03,719 BUFORD: What is the world coming to? WOMAN: Here, let me help you. 964 01:11:05,986 --> 01:11:08,158 WOMAN: Are you all right? 965 01:11:11,700 --> 01:11:13,718 What's wrong, Sheriff? 966 01:11:13,785 --> 01:11:17,299 I ain't seen anything like that since I was a little baby. 967 01:11:17,336 --> 01:11:20,372 You wanna stay, Sheriff, you'll have to take your clothes off. 968 01:11:20,458 --> 01:11:24,564 I don't even take my clothes off in front of my good wife Wilhelmina. 969 01:11:24,601 --> 01:11:25,916 [Nudists exclaiming] 970 01:11:29,050 --> 01:11:30,997 Give me the good old days... 971 01:11:31,020 --> 01:11:35,637 when a pair of boobs were a couple of dumb guys. 972 01:11:39,770 --> 01:11:43,853 WOMAN: Junior. JUNIOR: Oh, hi. This is a great picnic. 973 01:11:43,889 --> 01:11:47,152 Yeah, but there goes your daddy, and he's mad. 974 01:11:48,529 --> 01:11:50,189 I gotta go. 975 01:11:51,449 --> 01:11:53,240 JUNIOR: My clothes. Thanks. 976 01:11:53,326 --> 01:11:57,073 PILOT: [On radio] CoI. Enos, they're approaching in a westerly direction. 977 01:11:59,707 --> 01:12:02,926 They're coming through. I told you they'd take the short cut. 978 01:12:02,962 --> 01:12:06,955 Daddy, when you plot skulduggery, you plot skulduggery. 979 01:12:06,991 --> 01:12:11,145 Well, my IQ is a little bigger than my hat size, Son. 980 01:12:14,096 --> 01:12:16,090 JUNIOR: Daddy, there's The Bandit! 981 01:12:16,976 --> 01:12:20,640 Now we're gonna close in on that hog butt! 982 01:12:20,729 --> 01:12:23,219 Col. Enos calling Private Enos. 983 01:12:23,256 --> 01:12:26,329 BIG ENOS: Do you read me? GIRL: Yeah, Grandpa. I can hear you. 984 01:12:26,401 --> 01:12:30,185 - All right, are you ready? - Yes, sir, Col. Grandpa, sir! 985 01:12:31,781 --> 01:12:34,707 BIG ENOS: Okay, now get set. 986 01:12:34,910 --> 01:12:38,129 BUFORD: Hold it. 987 01:12:38,956 --> 01:12:41,784 BIG ENOS: Okay, girI, let her rip! 988 01:12:42,209 --> 01:12:44,249 [Explosions] 989 01:12:46,630 --> 01:12:51,049 - Daddy, what's all that noise? - The car's backfiring! 990 01:12:51,051 --> 01:12:54,218 DUSTY: Somebody's shooting off bombs back there. 991 01:12:57,099 --> 01:12:59,541 - It's them Enos boys. - Who are they? 992 01:12:59,578 --> 01:13:03,103 They are the inventors of dirty pool. 993 01:13:03,105 --> 01:13:06,107 [Heroic instrumental music] 994 01:13:10,529 --> 01:13:13,169 BIG ENOS: Get set. Now! 995 01:13:16,536 --> 01:13:18,445 [Big Enos laughing heartily] 996 01:13:30,132 --> 01:13:32,378 Daddy. 997 01:13:33,011 --> 01:13:35,989 Thunderbutt got through. 998 01:13:36,014 --> 01:13:41,297 - What happened, Daddy? - I guess we blew another goddamn tyre! 999 01:13:41,561 --> 01:13:43,601 LITTLE ENOS: Bring us down, girls. 1000 01:13:43,813 --> 01:13:46,367 How could that be? 1001 01:13:47,233 --> 01:13:49,856 [Comical instrumental music] 1002 01:13:51,112 --> 01:13:53,005 BIG ENOS: Man, oh, man! 1003 01:13:53,114 --> 01:13:56,756 LITTLE ENOS: Holy Buddha, those suckers are flying! 1004 01:13:57,245 --> 01:13:59,645 Yeah, Daddy, I'm not bored anymore. 1005 01:13:59,681 --> 01:14:02,900 This is more fun than being snowed in at a cathouse, you know. 1006 01:14:02,937 --> 01:14:07,211 Let's get back to the ranch, Son. I don't wanna miss how this thing turns out. 1007 01:14:08,339 --> 01:14:09,833 [Fast-paced instrumental music] 1008 01:14:09,923 --> 01:14:13,995 Cledus, you're not gonna hit that gate? 1009 01:14:14,031 --> 01:14:16,128 CLEDUS: That gate is gone. 1010 01:14:19,726 --> 01:14:22,181 [Fast-paced instrumental music continues] 1011 01:14:30,820 --> 01:14:34,070 - Oh! - Oh, my aching head. 1012 01:14:36,826 --> 01:14:39,282 Will you get in the car, Junior? 1013 01:14:39,371 --> 01:14:43,675 This is no time for any of your funny high jinks. 1014 01:14:43,791 --> 01:14:48,899 I'm sorry, Daddy. I must've forgotten the seat belt. 1015 01:14:50,882 --> 01:14:53,040 [Upbeat country song] 1016 01:15:03,519 --> 01:15:07,138 Is it my imagination, or are you slowing down? 1017 01:15:07,440 --> 01:15:08,883 Maybe. 1018 01:15:09,359 --> 01:15:11,398 CLEDUS: Let me put it to you this way: 1019 01:15:11,486 --> 01:15:14,440 What good would the Road Runner be without the Coyote? 1020 01:15:14,531 --> 01:15:17,734 What good would the fox be without the hound, right? 1021 01:15:18,243 --> 01:15:21,602 And can you have a bandit if you ain't got a smokey? 1022 01:15:21,638 --> 01:15:24,704 - Not really. - Well, now you do. 1023 01:15:24,741 --> 01:15:26,335 I'm slowing down. 1024 01:15:31,923 --> 01:15:34,561 All right, I got it bumper-to-bumper. 1025 01:15:34,597 --> 01:15:38,549 - Hop up there, Junior, and get the fish. - But, Daddy I'm carrying- 1026 01:15:38,639 --> 01:15:40,864 Hop up there and get the fish. 1027 01:15:40,900 --> 01:15:44,709 - But, Daddy- - Get the fish or I'll barbecue your ass! 1028 01:15:49,609 --> 01:15:51,233 [Upbeat country song continues] 1029 01:15:57,116 --> 01:15:59,238 That's right, Junior. 1030 01:16:00,370 --> 01:16:02,408 Just help yourself, son. 1031 01:16:02,496 --> 01:16:05,272 BUFORD: Come on, Junior! Come on back! 1032 01:16:08,294 --> 01:16:13,416 Junior, you are a brave little tick turd. 1033 01:16:13,453 --> 01:16:15,172 Oh, thank you, Daddy! 1034 01:16:18,388 --> 01:16:20,132 Way to go, Buford! 1035 01:16:36,114 --> 01:16:39,139 DUSTY: Why are you stopping? We better get out of here. 1036 01:16:39,493 --> 01:16:44,785 This show right here is only costing me $250,000. 1037 01:16:44,821 --> 01:16:47,466 Do you mind if I just watch it? 1038 01:16:50,087 --> 01:16:53,123 Well. There's your fish. 1039 01:16:53,214 --> 01:16:55,967 Sheriff, this is hard for me to say... 1040 01:16:56,051 --> 01:16:58,838 but you won it fair and square. Congratulations. 1041 01:16:59,054 --> 01:17:01,546 Give him the money, son. 1042 01:17:02,518 --> 01:17:04,674 I'd like to kick your ass. 1043 01:17:04,852 --> 01:17:08,139 You can't kick that high, cricket crotch. 1044 01:17:09,231 --> 01:17:11,225 I accept this prize... 1045 01:17:11,651 --> 01:17:17,110 as a token of another one of my landmark achievements. 1046 01:17:17,146 --> 01:17:20,199 Hold the money, Junior. And don't let Mama see it... 1047 01:17:20,327 --> 01:17:24,163 if you don't wanna sing soprano for the rest of your life. 1048 01:17:24,330 --> 01:17:25,789 Now... 1049 01:17:28,960 --> 01:17:31,286 Just that long. 1050 01:17:34,757 --> 01:17:38,458 - Oh! He's coming over here. - I know. I told you. 1051 01:17:38,553 --> 01:17:41,305 - Will you hurry up? Will you please hurry. - It won't crank! 1052 01:17:41,390 --> 01:17:43,631 - What do you mean? - The car won't crank. 1053 01:17:43,724 --> 01:17:47,059 BIG ENOS: Come on, let's get this party started. Let's have a drink! 1054 01:17:47,145 --> 01:17:50,081 We can all exchange clothes. 1055 01:17:52,108 --> 01:17:54,600 Would you get away from me, you shit! 1056 01:17:54,778 --> 01:17:57,546 I'm making this collar single only. 1057 01:17:57,864 --> 01:18:00,237 DUSTY: You're The Bandit. Tell me what we are going to do. 1058 01:18:00,325 --> 01:18:02,947 CLEDUS: I am not The Bandit. The Bandit is The Bandit. 1059 01:18:03,037 --> 01:18:06,120 The only man in the world that thinks I'm- 1060 01:18:06,540 --> 01:18:08,165 Wait a minute. 1061 01:18:08,291 --> 01:18:12,846 Sit back. And don't move a muscle! 1062 01:18:12,922 --> 01:18:14,629 [Suspenseful instrumental music] 1063 01:18:22,390 --> 01:18:24,113 I got you. 1064 01:18:29,855 --> 01:18:34,897 Hello, Buford. Well, you caught me with my pants down. 1065 01:18:34,902 --> 01:18:38,312 - I did? - That's a figure of speech. 1066 01:18:38,406 --> 01:18:41,408 - I got you! - Yeah. 1067 01:18:41,451 --> 01:18:43,574 It's over for the old Bandit. 1068 01:18:43,662 --> 01:18:46,063 BUFORD: Yeah, you're gone. BANDIT: It's gone. 1069 01:18:46,664 --> 01:18:48,372 BANDIT: Buford? BUFORD: Yes, sir. 1070 01:18:50,146 --> 01:18:53,125 I just wanna say one last thing to you before you... 1071 01:18:53,213 --> 01:18:54,542 haul me off in the cuffs. 1072 01:18:54,630 --> 01:18:57,335 - Go right ahead. - There's a kind of a... 1073 01:18:57,425 --> 01:19:00,412 a kindred spirit we have, you know what I mean? 1074 01:19:00,448 --> 01:19:02,774 Yeah. I think I feel the same way. 1075 01:19:02,811 --> 01:19:06,155 No, I mean it's special. I can almost read your thoughts. 1076 01:19:06,192 --> 01:19:07,559 BUFORD: Is that so? BANDIT: Yeah. 1077 01:19:07,644 --> 01:19:10,846 What am I thinking right now? 1078 01:19:10,939 --> 01:19:13,630 You're thinking right now that possibly you... 1079 01:19:13,667 --> 01:19:16,686 No sense sending me off to prison where I'd lose all my friends... 1080 01:19:16,777 --> 01:19:17,858 and everything. I mean... 1081 01:19:17,946 --> 01:19:21,170 you could give me a five-second head start and chase after me- 1082 01:19:21,262 --> 01:19:23,731 Oh, no, I'm sorry. I'm a law-and-order man. 1083 01:19:23,828 --> 01:19:26,497 I got you and I'm gonna keep you. 1084 01:19:26,533 --> 01:19:29,079 Yeah, you're right. I was silly to even think that. 1085 01:19:29,116 --> 01:19:31,158 BANDIT: You're too tough for that. BUFORD: That's right. 1086 01:19:31,251 --> 01:19:34,903 BUFORD: I'm upright, straightforward- JUNIOR: [Voiceover] Now that you've... 1087 01:19:34,981 --> 01:19:38,537 finally caught The Bandit, you can really retire. 1088 01:19:38,573 --> 01:19:42,922 We can go back to sunny Florida and you can collect your seashells... 1089 01:19:43,056 --> 01:19:44,764 and you can play shuffleboard. 1090 01:19:44,849 --> 01:19:49,407 And we can even go back and see that big funny whale jump again. 1091 01:19:49,443 --> 01:19:54,802 But most and best of all, Daddy, I'll take you fishing with me. 1092 01:19:56,234 --> 01:19:59,930 - I'll give you a five-minute head start. - Bye-bye! 1093 01:20:00,240 --> 01:20:01,734 [Tyres screeching] 1094 01:20:03,159 --> 01:20:07,437 Junior! 1095 01:20:12,919 --> 01:20:15,031 BUFORD: What the hell are you doing? 1096 01:20:15,067 --> 01:20:19,232 I was trying to stop The Bandit from getting away, Daddy. 1097 01:20:20,177 --> 01:20:24,297 I said it before, and I'll say it again: 1098 01:20:24,347 --> 01:20:29,042 There is no way that you could come from my loins. 1099 01:20:29,185 --> 01:20:34,264 And as soon as we get home, I'm putting a big lump on your mama's head. 1100 01:20:34,441 --> 01:20:38,109 Now get in the car. We're on pursuit alert. 1101 01:20:41,489 --> 01:20:44,657 Well, Cledus, I'll tell you, I gotta hand it to you. You did it. 1102 01:20:44,744 --> 01:20:46,277 - I did it, didn't I? - You did it! 1103 01:20:46,369 --> 01:20:49,330 I did it! Don't know what I did, but I did it. 1104 01:20:49,497 --> 01:20:53,309 DUSTY: Hey, do you mind if I tag along? CLEDUS: What? 1105 01:20:55,129 --> 01:20:57,749 [Comical country instrumental music] 1106 01:21:00,843 --> 01:21:02,717 Where did they go? 1107 01:21:02,803 --> 01:21:04,677 Pumpkin! 1108 01:21:05,348 --> 01:21:08,425 Now, I know you didn't mean to leave me this time. 1109 01:21:08,461 --> 01:21:10,889 Madame Godzilla is back. 1110 01:21:10,978 --> 01:21:12,306 [Car approaching] 1111 01:21:12,855 --> 01:21:15,642 BUFORD: Get the hell out of there! HOOKER: I wanna come, too! 1112 01:21:15,733 --> 01:21:18,569 - There ain't no room! - Oh, yes, there is! 1113 01:21:24,368 --> 01:21:26,701 Wait, Daddy! 1114 01:21:29,226 --> 01:21:31,872 JUNIOR: Don't leave me! 1115 01:21:32,125 --> 01:21:35,308 JUNIOR: Wait, Daddy. 1116 01:21:35,879 --> 01:21:37,705 JUNIOR: Wait for me. 1117 01:21:37,797 --> 01:21:39,706 JUNIOR: Don't leave me, Daddy! 1118 01:21:40,572 --> 01:21:46,798 [Fast-paced country song] 1119 01:21:46,835 --> 01:21:48,465 The outlaw run 1120 01:21:50,227 --> 01:21:51,935 Is an endless one 1121 01:21:53,980 --> 01:21:55,772 It's a hungry night 1122 01:21:57,775 --> 01:21:59,899 Where wrong is right 1123 01:22:01,530 --> 01:22:03,902 And the race is done 1124 01:22:05,117 --> 01:22:07,241 When the race is won 1125 01:22:08,912 --> 01:22:10,905 In the morning sun 1126 01:22:11,707 --> 01:22:14,245 Just look into the light 1127 01:22:16,128 --> 01:22:18,286 And I'm behind you now 1128 01:22:19,214 --> 01:22:21,586 With a ticket for the wind 1129 01:22:23,678 --> 01:22:25,801 I'm behind you now 1130 01:22:26,764 --> 01:22:29,005 Baby, you can never win 1131 01:22:31,184 --> 01:22:33,344 I'm behind you now 1132 01:22:34,313 --> 01:22:36,887 And your days are getting thin 1133 01:22:39,025 --> 01:22:41,149 I'm behind you now 1134 01:22:41,863 --> 01:22:44,235 With a ticket for the wind 1135 01:22:58,005 --> 01:22:59,997 And The Bandit's trying 1136 01:23:01,799 --> 01:23:03,922 There's a borderline 1137 01:23:05,595 --> 01:23:07,470 That's already crossed 1138 01:23:09,307 --> 01:23:11,430 When the game is lost 1139 01:23:12,936 --> 01:23:15,262 And the hunter's luck 1140 01:23:16,648 --> 01:23:18,308 Is a single shot 1141 01:23:20,443 --> 01:23:22,353 When the sun is hot 1142 01:23:23,239 --> 01:23:25,611 And the dice are tossed 1143 01:23:27,743 --> 01:23:29,651 I'm behind you now 1144 01:23:30,954 --> 01:23:33,078 With a ticket for the wind 1145 01:23:35,209 --> 01:23:37,201 I'm behind you now 1146 01:23:38,337 --> 01:23:40,377 And you can never win 1147 01:23:42,508 --> 01:23:44,417 I'm behind you now 1148 01:23:45,844 --> 01:23:48,336 And your days are getting thin 1149 01:23:50,558 --> 01:23:52,467 I'm behind you now 1150 01:23:53,394 --> 01:23:55,600 With a ticket for the wind 1151 01:24:24,176 --> 01:24:26,168 I'm behind you now 1152 01:24:27,346 --> 01:24:29,716 With a ticket for the wind 1153 01:24:30,557 --> 01:24:32,846 Yeah, I'm behind you now 1154 01:24:34,352 --> 01:24:36,725 Oh, and you can never win 1155 01:24:37,305 --> 01:24:43,253 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org 90624

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