Original subtitles

(Marla): Once upon a time, there was an 18-year-old human,

uh...

Oh, come on, Marla, just... just be normal. Just be normal.

There comes a time in every young person's life...

Not "person." That sounds too formal.

Girl. No, not girl.

Woman.

There comes a time in every young woman's life

when she has to make a decision.

Okay, um...

Look, Mom and Dad,

obviously I want to go to college,

education is the most important thing in the world, but...

after 12 years of school,

think about how valuable it will be for me

to actually experience the world.

As Amelia Earhart once said:

"Adventure is worthwhile in itself."

Which is why... (chuckling)

I got...

- ...this! - (knocking)

- (door opening) - What's in your pocket?

- What? Nothing.

- If you don't tell me,

I'll tell Mom you gave me ice cream for dinner.

- Wow! Blackmail.

- Impressive, but illegal. - Not when you're six.

- Alright, you have to promise not to tell

Mom and Dad until I've told them.

Pinky swear?

- Pinky swear.

- Do you know what this is? - A really small notebook?

- It's a passport. It lets you go anywhere in the world.

I've saved up all my work money and I'm gonna backpack everywhere.

And then I'll go to college. It's just...

I don't know, Mom and Dad make everything so easy for us, you know?

Sometimes, you gotta test yourself.

- But you take lots of tests.

- No, not those kind of tests. Real-life tests.

Where you go everywhere,

and do everything, and see what you're really made of.

I get to be an explorer. A "never before her."

A crosser of borders.

- Like Lewis or Clark. - Who?

♪ I'll take any gamble ♪

♪ There's so much to sample ♪

♪ Nothing I can't handle ♪

♪ Can't wait to embark ♪

- Life lesson number 321, Charlie. - (Charlie giggling)

Nothing worse than a small, stationary life.

- Dullsville! - (Charlie laughing)

♪ One day I'll wanna say I tried it all took every bite ♪

♪ I'll get my passport stamped on every page ♪

♪ What a sight ♪

♪ I wanna live where they speak solamente español ♪

Meet all new people eat street food,

dance flamenco, bolero and tango!

- Wow!

♪ There's so much world out there ♪

♪ And I've got to see it all ♪

♪ There's so much world to share ♪

♪ And it's just outside these walls ♪

♪ I won't stop till I've seen ♪

♪ What's beyond that horizon ♪

♪ There's so much world out there to see ♪

♪ And it's waiting for me ♪

(laughter)

Oh, and we're gonna go on some big adventures together, Charlie.

- Promise?

♪ We don't need a posh life a connect-the-dots life ♪

♪ I'll hop on the next flight into the unknown ♪

♪ We'll study history in the places history was made ♪

♪ Learn all about real knights and how the Romans slayed ♪

♪ I know you're dying to see the Coliseum ♪

- I am!

- And I wanna go with you, more than anyone!

That's our arena. We'll pretend to fight for freedom!

♪ There's so much world out there ♪

(laughing)

♪ And we've got to see it all ♪

♪ No stone unturned ♪

I swear!

♪ My bucket list is just too long ♪

♪ We can't stop ♪

♪ Till we've seen the places we've had our eyes on ♪

And maybe we'll discover the eighth world wonder!

♪ We'll see ♪

- ♪ It's all waiting for you ♪ - (Charlie laughing)

♪ And it's waiting for me ♪

♪ It's waiting for you and me ♪♪

(laughter)

- Oh, the Roman warriors and ogres have surrounded Charlie the Brave!

- Ta-ta-ta-ta! Who's that?

Could it be... Marla, the noble knight? Hi-yah!

Stay away from my brother!

Is it time for the super...

(both):...duo slingshot?!

- Whoa...!

Hi-yah! Ha!

Catch me, Charlie, catch me! We saved the day!

(both): Viking and knight!

Viking and knight! Viking and knight!

Viking and knight! Viking and knight!

- (doorbell ringing) - Hey, Charlie, don't open the door!

- (doorbell ringing) - Alright, I'm coming!

- Marla Brenner?

- Yes.

- I'm sorry, but there's been an accident.

Could we please come inside and speak with you?

(voice fading): Your parents were in a car accident...

- Marla, you're not listening to me!

- Charlie, I am listening to you, but the answer is still no!

- So you're bailing on me again? Fine. Then I'll just go with Danny.

- Ha! To the city? I don't think so.

- You always do this!

- Hey! I am trying to run a household here.

- That doesn't mean we can't have any fun!

- Yeah, well, sometimes, there are more important things than fun.

- This sucks! - Language!

- And don't you dare... - (door slamming)

...slam the door.

(door slamming repeatedly)

Good!

That went great!

(beeping)

Charlie, dinner's ready.

- (knocking) - Come on. Bud, let's talk.

Charlie!

- Sorry.

Oh, hey, Danny. Uh... Yeah, I'm on my way now.

(sighing) Sorry. Uh, not too long.

Yeah, can you hold on a minute?

Danny? Yeah, my sister was totally cool with it.

Uh...yeah, I'm close.

I think, like, 10 minutes.

(thunder crashing)

- Make that 20.

- Come on, Charlie, pick up the phone!

(groaning)

Midtown?! Argh! Are you kidding me?!

- Hey, whoa! Lady! You can't go in there.

- Trust me, mister, I am not here for the Gateway to Fun.

My little brother is in there, I have to find him

so I can tell him he's grounded till he's 18.

- Yeah, okay, let's go. - Thank you!

- No, I said let's go, you know, together. She's gonna make me run!

- Whoa.

Charlie?

(Charlie): This is so awesome!

- Charlie? Charlie!

- Marla! - What were you thinking?!

- How did you find me? - You scared me half to death.

- I'm sorry, but you won't believe this! You have to check this out!

- Charlie, we're leaving. - No! Wait! Marla!

It's all lined up exactly like we had it.

There's the Coliseum and all the knights.

Remember? What are... what are the chances?

- Look, any minute now, a rent-a-cop is gonna come

through that curtain and arrest us for trespassing.

- Come on! Look around!

It's like we're meant to be here.

- Meant to be here? That's ridiculous.

- What is wrong with you? - Excuse me?

- You used to talk about adventures and seeing the world.

"Nothing's worse than a small, stationary life?"

- But I grew up, Charlie.

And I learned the hard way that life is not an adventure.

It's full of disappointments and it's not the way you want it to be.

- That's just how you made it

because you don't do anything, you won't let me do anything!

It's like ever since Mom and Dad died...

- Don't, Charlie.

...you died.

And now we're just pretending to be a family.

- Well, then, I guess you're just stuck with dead old me.

Come on, let's go.

- No!

Wait. There's even a spot here... for my Viking!

- No, there's not, Charlie!

This is not for us! This is a toy!

It's a stupid toy, and none of this means anything!

- (disembodied cackling) - (rumbling)

(disembodied laughter)

I think something bad's happening.

- Or something good.

Whoa!

(epic music)

- No. - It's magic!

Marla, look!

- Look. - No, no...

- Whoa! - (laughing)

- Charlie!

Oh...my...

No! Charlie, don't!

(crackling)

(screaming)

(exclaiming) Whoa!

Oh...! Son of a...

Whoa! Ow! Ah! Oof!

(groaning) Ah!

Whoa-oh-oh! Ow!

(grunting)

(exclaiming softly, groaning)

Ah! (grunting)

(grunting)

Huh. Oh.

- (birdsong) - Ah...huh?

(screaming)

Huh? Huh? (whimpering)

- Whoa! - Charlie?

- What the...? - I'm coming! Hang on!

Whoa! Oh! Okay, Marla! (grunting)

Left, right, left...

Whoa! Oh!

- Charlie? - Wha...

- Ah! - Ah...wow.

- (Marla gasping) Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa!

Easy, tough guy. Just looking for my brother.

- (laughing) That tickles! Stop!

(laughing) Marla, it's me.

- Oh...huh? - You look weird. Where are we?

- Oh... - What's going on?

- Charlie?! - Yeah, Marla.

- You're not...you.

- I know! I feel different!

- Yeah...you look different.

You have a...a beard!

- Ha! I do!

- And tattoos! - Tattoos?!

Cool.

- What's happening?! - The lighthouse!

The Vikings. All of it.

It's...it's real!

- We're actually here! - (Marla exclaiming)

- Ho! Ho! Ho! Ho! Oh, my... - The lighthouse?

- The lighthouse? The lighthouse! - Cool!

That's it! We came through the lighthouse to get here.

- Marla? - So that must be the way back!

- Of course! - Marla?

- That's how these magic things work, isn't it?

- Marla?! - Now, how do we get up there?

- (horn blowing) - What the...?

(screaming)

(all roaring)

- Whoa! That's... - Terrifying!

- Awesome!

- (horns blaring) - (screaming)

- (roaring) - Charge!

- Ready?! Release!

- Charlie! Run! (screaming)

- Fire!

- (panting) - (exclamations)

- Fire! - (roaring)

(panting and screaming)

- (Vikings grunting) - Charlie?

- Ah! Whoa! - (Vikings roaring)

- (grunting) - Ah! Whoa!

(whimpering and exclaiming)

- Excuse me! Are you guys the good guys?

Never mind, I'll just follow you.

- Ah! What's going on?!

- (grunting) - (groaning)

Don't worry, Charlie, I'm coming! Oh!

- Marla?

- Marla? Whoops. Sorry. Ah! - Oh!

- I didn't mean to. Sorry, sir. - (Viking roaring)

Whoops! My bad. Excuse me.

- I'm not scared of you! - Ah!

- Changed my mind! - (cheering)

- Uh... - (roaring and grunting)

- Cool! Whoo! - (cheering)

- (grunting) - (Charlie): Hi-yah!

- (Charlie laughing) - Mommy!

- (Charlie): Yes! - What?

- I've got my super strength! (laughing)

- Oh...! - Whoo-hoo!

- Ah...! - (laughter)

- Let me try this! - Ah...!

- Who's he? - Whoa-oh-oh! This is amazing!

- Do it again, lad! Yah! - Off he goes!

- Oh! - (cheering)

- I saw this on wrestling! Whoo! - (cheering)

- Amazing.

- I'll take that! (laughing)

- (cheering) - Retreat, lads! Retreat!

(all roaring)

- (cheering) - You.

- Me?

- What be thy name, warrior?

- Um...Charlie.

- (birds chirping)

- I thought your voice would be a little deeper.

Oh, no matter. Charles the Destroyer.

Tonight we feast in your honor!

- (cheering) - Really? A feast? For me?

That's so cool!

- Shiver me timbers! Ye be seein' what I seein'?

- 'Tis no man! 'Tis a beast!

(emperor): Hello?! Can you hear me? Hello?

- Somebody get the IT guys. Is this on? - Ahoy, Emperor.

- What's taking you idiot pirates so long?!

I could've captured an entire Viking horde myself

and been home for dessert by now!

- I think we found just what you be lookin' for.

- I'm not paying you to think!

I'm paying you to bring me back the strongest, fiercest, nastiest

Viking warrior you can find!

And make it quick! Okay, you cretins?!

- Uh...what be a cretin? - Ah!

You bilge rat, of course you wouldn't know.

It's, um...it's, um...

...bread you put in salad!

- Quiet, all of ya! It'd be decided then.

We found our treasure.

And it be that impressive Viking.

- (Vikings cheering)

- Oh. - (Vikings chanting): Charles! Charles!

Charles! Charles!

- Huh? - (chanting continues)

- (horn blowing)

- (chanting continues) - (cheering)

- (laughter)

- Uh, hello?

Excuse me! Coming through. Sir? Man who is clearly ignoring me.

- We've won! The battle is ours!

- Oh! Charlie! - (laughter)

- (all singing) - Charlie!

Oh, thank goodness. There you are!

- Yes! Wah-ha-ha-ha! - Actually, I go by Charles now.

I think it goes better with the tattoos and this giant axe, don't you?

- Where did you get that?!

- Who be this? Your squire? - Excuse me?

- ♪ Is it friend or foe ♪ - We're just gonna go.

♪ No...way ♪

- Whoa! - ♪ Silly wench ♪

- What?! - ♪ Please ♪

♪ Go and fetch our hero a flagon of mead ♪

- ♪ Oh, oh... ♪♪ - (laughing)

- Are you kidding? - And make haste.

- I'm his sister. And it's late. - Not now! Stop it, Marla!

- So if you woolly mammoths would put him down, that'd be great.

Thanks. He actually has school tomorrow.

And he should've been in bed, like, two hours ago.

♪ Not a chance, he's with us ♪

♪ He has proven himself of value and thus he stays... ♪

- (grunting) - (laughing)

♪ We celebrate... ♪

Gentleman, show how we do!

- ♪ Oh, we raise our cups ♪ - ♪ We raise our cups ♪

- ♪ To our hero's might ♪ - ♪ To our hero's might ♪

♪ It's Charles the Destroyer we honor tonight ♪

- ♪ We could all be dead ♪ - ♪ We could all be dead ♪

- ♪ By tomorrow morn ♪ - ♪ By tomorrow morn ♪

♪ It's all for one and one for all, brothers in arms ♪

♪ Brothers in arms, brothers in arms ♪

♪ We are brothers in arms ♪♪

- Come on, Marla, this is real!

And everyone thinks I'm great. This is rad!

- It's mad! - Well, I'm loving it. I'm gonna stay.

- Charlie, seriously?

Please. Look around.

We gotta get back home.

- We gotta go now. - No!

♪ If you can't see this is fun ♪

♪ Then I don't know what you've become ♪

- ♪ Gonna take my place ♪ - ♪ Gonna take his place ♪

- ♪ Brother in arms ♪ - ♪ Brothers in arms ♪

♪ I'm Charles the Destroyer ♪

- ♪ Enemies be warned ♪ - ♪ Enemies be warned ♪

- ♪ Let the feast begin ♪ - ♪ Let the feast begin ♪

- ♪ Got an appetite ♪ - ♪ Got an appetite ♪

♪ I bet this Viking party boat's gonna go all night ♪

♪ Wa da da da da Wa da da da dee ♪

♪ It's Charles the Destroyer for the victory ♪

♪ Wa da da da da ♪

♪ Wa da da da dum ♪

♪ It's all for one and one for all, brothers in arms ♪

♪ Brothers in arms ♪

♪ Brothers in arms... ♪

♪ And I'm staying right here, ahh! ♪♪

(screaming) Ha-ha! I'm flying!

This is awesome!

- Charlie! No!

(exclaiming and grunting)

- (neighing) - Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa! Whoo!

- (screaming) - A-a-avast!

Lady Fortune has sent him right to us!

(screaming)

- Whoa! Whoa! When I dreamed of riding a horse one day,

this is not what I had in mind, oh!

(grunting)

- Hey! - Come on! Hurry!

- Yah! Whoa, whoa, whoa!

Oh! Ah! Oh! Ow! Oh!

Ah!

(exclaiming) Oh, no!

No! Ah! Whoa, whoa, whoa!

- (screaming) - (neighing)

Oh! Whoa, whoa!

- Whoa. - (horns honking)

- Charlie! Yah! - (neighing)

Whoa...!

- Fitzy...my good man,

it is Del, your buddy, callin'.

Heh. With the truck.

We've met many times!

Yes, yes! I got a beard, yeah! (laughing)

Anyway, listen, what if I told you

I had an incredible opportunity on some rare enchanted hay.

- Huh! I'm coming for you, Charlie!

Yah! Giddy-up!

- So how much can I put you down for? Let's crunch some numbers.

- Hey, watch it! Watch... (screaming)

- I don't want no trouble!

- No!

- At that price, I'm practically paying you.

Oh, hold on. I'm getting another call. Someone probably wanting hay.

Del's Enchanted Hay. This is Del.

- Del! - Glinara!

What a surprise.

- We need to talk! Now! - You sound angry, Glinara.

- I want my money!

- What a coincidence. I'm just happened to be on my way

to pick up your money right now, it's great.

- Oh! - My dogs are going crazy!

- Get outta here! - I need to borrow this! Ah! Oof!

- Oh, that's my pole! - Come on!

- I gotta feed my kids with that! Come on! - Oh! Ouch! Oh!

- (exclaiming) - (honking)

- Oof! Ah! Oh! Oh! Argh!

- But this truck is all I have!

You can't just send someone to take my...

- Ah! Outta the way! (panting) I'm taking the truck.

- What?! N-n-n-no! - Give me that!

- Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey! - Stop it!

- Tell Glinara I need more time! Please!

Who do you think you are?!

Why are you doing this to me?! Don't hurt Del's Belle!

- You're going to make us crash! - It's my truck, lady!

- I got enough troubles! Ow! - Move your foot! Aha!

- Whoa! Ah! What are you... Ugh!

- Go! Go! Fast! Oh!

Faster! Go! Come on!

Oh! What?! No! No, no, no, no, no, no!

Where did they go?! Where did they... Charlie!

- (horns honking) - Charlie?!

Oh...

I've...I've lost him.

- Joyride's over!

You clearly don't work for Glinara.

And this is my truck, lady! Have a nice life!

I'm saying that sarcastically!

- Ah!

(exclaiming) Argh!

Grrr! What the heck?!

What is going on in this crazy place?

- (sighing) - (horse snorting)

Oh!

Oh, thank goodness you're back.

Look, I realize we got off to a bad start,

and that I need you more than you need me...

- (neighing) - (exclaiming)

Ah! Oh!

Ah...

Huh. Alright.

Okay. I just need to find some help.

Perfect. (sighing)

(sighing)

- (bell tolling) - Huh?

Ah! Oh!

(bell tolling)

(neighing)

(banjo playing)

Hello?

Oh! (coughing)

Huh.

- Guess not. - (cowboy laughing)

- No! Not a darn-tootin' nugget of gold today!

- (horse snorting) - What? Well, yeah, I agree!

- Uh, sir? Excuse me?

Can I help you with something, little lady?

- Yeah! Any idea where I can find the sher...

- (gunshot) - Yee-haw!

- Uh... - Whoo!

- Eat lead, Sheriff! - (coughing) Sheriff?

- Yah! Yah! I'll get you boys!

- Sheriff! Sheriff! Wait, Sheriff, wait! - Yah! Giddy-up! Yah!

- Not on my watch! Hi-yah! - Sheriff! Sheriff! Sheriff?

- C'mon! Yah! Yah! - Sheriff? (sighing)

- Sheriff... - Yeah!

- And stay out! - (screaming) Oof!

- Him again? - Ow.

That hurts. (gasping)

Ugh! Ah...

Come on! We had a deal!

- Deal's off! Your hay dun changed my steeds!

Take a good look.

- What are you talking about? I don't see any...

(whinnying)

(whinnying)

Ah...that's not good.

(whinnying)

- All they want to do is frolic and dance around!

And there's glitter everywhere!

- The-the-the wizard who sold me the hay

didn't say anything about sprouting wings!

- Well, he should have! Lying wizard!

And I'm not paying you a plumb cent!

- No, no, no, no! Please! I was counting on that money.

I need to pay Glinara back!

Aw, come on!

- Oh, look who it is. You make friends everywhere you go, don't you?

- You! You're the maniac who carjacked me, and lost all my hay!

Why-why are you following me?!

- Me? Following you?! I don't think so.

- 'Cause I already have enough problems!

- I'm just here to...

...get a posse together.

- You? Gather a posse?

(snickering)

(laughing)

Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. A posse. I gotta see this. Okay, go ahead.

- Ugh!

(vultures screeching)

Ahem.

Okay. Yee-haw!

Um...giddy-up, lil' pardners.

I'm, uh, leadin' a posse

to find my rootin-est, tootin-est brother.

Don't it sound like a hoot and a holler?

(laughing)

Uh-heh. I'll, uh...

I'll pay a fair wage.

(all): Oh!

- Gold!

- (clucking) - (gasping)

- Oh, great! You're all coming forward?

This is excellent! Do any of you have resumes?

- Why didn't you tell me you had Viking gold?!

Are you out of your mind? Put those away!

Half this town will kill you for them,

the other half doesn't need a reason!

- How's about you hand over that gold? Nice and slow-like.

- Come on. - Hi.

- Guys? - Walking away now.

- We can work something out here. - Ah!

- Ooh! - Ah!

- Ah! - (all shouting)

(exclaiming)

(screaming)

(all): Whoo! Yee-hoo!

- Ooh! What...?

- Who are...? Excuse me!

- Where'd she go?! Oh, I see her! Get that gold!

(exclaiming)

- (cowboys shouting) - Ah!

- (whooping) - I want that gold!

(panting)

- (whooping) - Come on! Let's go!

(musical honking)

- Quick! Throw me the gold! Throw me the gold! Hurry!

- What?! No! - Okay, get in!

Get in! Come on! Come on!

- We'll get you, girl!

- Hey, wait! Wait, wait! - (whinnying)

- Oh! - (disappointed exclamations)

- Hey, uh, the saddlebag move you did, nicely done.

I was gonna do it, yeah...

I was about to do it, and then I saw you do it,

and I was, like, well, I'm not gonna do it now.

But you know what? No hard feelings.

- Yeah, I could tell, especially when you were

hiding behind me like a scared little poodle.

- That's... (laughing)

Uh, so...

- About the gold? - Seriously? (sighing)

You know, you can just drop me off at the next exit. I'm cool.

- You want to get off at Jurassic Jungle? Okay.

(screeching)

- Holy...!

Um, you know, on...on second thought,

why don't we just keep driving, heh?

I'm Marla, by the way.

- Hi, Marla. I'm Del.

And this is, uh, Del's Belle, my truck.

I don't let a lot of people in here,

and I'm, uh, letting you in because I like you,

and not just because you're rich or that you have a bag of coins.

- That has nothing to do with it. - Um, is this a food truck?

- Used to be. Yeah, couple guys in Summer Fun Land traded it to me

for a pirate's cannon a few years ago.

Now she's my mobile office,

my apartment on wheels.

I sleep here, I live here.

Anyway, we have had some fun! (laughing)

Me and Del's Belle, all the stories she could tell...

- And I'd love to hear them.

But I need to focus on finding my little brother right now.

- Okay. What does he look like?

- Well, actually, he's about this tall,

tattoos, beard,

carries around this giant axe.

- How old is he? - He's 10.

- Well, lucky for you, you ended up with me!

With my connections, I could find your brother, no problemo.

But the truth is, my back's against the wall here, alright?

All I want to do is help. That's all I want to do. But you know what?

I'm gonna have to be compensated for my time.

How many gold coins did you say were in the bag?

- 40. Maybe 50.

And they're all yours if you can help me find Charlie.

- You got yourself a deal. - Deal!

- Ha-ha-ha-ha! Yeah! Me and Del's Belle are on the case!

Ain't nothin' gonna stop...

- Stop! Stop! Stop! - (Marla screaming)

- No...! - (Del screaming)

- (exclamations and screaming) - (squirrel screeching)

- Hold on! I'm gonna try to bring her in for a landing!

(both screaming)

- Whoa...!

- Whoo! Lean into it!

(Marla screaming)

- Oh. - (pirate laughing)

- We be rich, lads! Tonight we feast!

The first round of turkey legs is on me, alright?!

- What?! I can't believe what I'm seeing!

Me own crew collectin' a booty for me booty?!

- You think you can just snatch me away

from my Amazonian sisters in the middle of the night?!

Oh! Unleash me now and see how you fare!

- Pipe down, Amazonian. You're hurting my ears.

- Quiet, Zarkonian scum,

or I'll rip your three tongues out with my bare hands!

- Argh! Ook-Ook free! Ook-Ook free now!

- (fanfare) - All hail...

...His Royal Highness!

Emperor...Maximus!

- Dum-da-da-dum... (laughing)

Well, well, look what we have here.

(laughing) I really was on the nice list this year.

- Argh! - Mm. Yes, strong.

And you have the braids of a much stronger woman.

- (laughing) - This is a beard! Argh!

- Oh! Oh! - And what do we have here?

- Your worst nightmare.

- Pfft. You're not a piñata full of bees?

- Hey, sir! Let me go! - Hmm?

- My new Viking friends are coming for me, I'm sure of it.

And when they free me, we're all gonna make you pay!

- Ha! Well, good luck to them finding you.

Good luck to anyone finding you here.

(laughing) This entire city is on a remote island.

It's surrounded by jagged rocks and an impenetrable wall,

guarded day and night.

No one's coming for you, kid.

Trust me.

- Balderdash!

Release me now,

and I may just let you live, vile knave!

- You kiss your mother with that mouth? Pfft! Goodbye!

- I'll get you! Ah! (grunting) - (Emperor laughing)

Are you ready to have some fun?!

(inhaling deeply)

♪ You're probably wondering what you're doing here ♪

I bet you're dying to know.

Oops. Bad choice of words.

♪ Who's the stylish lad with the fresh toga gear ♪

Let me explain before the show. ♪ Eyes on me ♪

♪ I am ruler of these masses ♪

♪ Like my daddy and my daddy's daddy before that daddy ♪

♪ Their protection from trespassers ♪

That's you, big guy. ♪ Invented a game ♪

♪ It keeps 'em tame and that's how I stay on top ♪

♪ I give the people what they want... ♪

♪ And what they want's a little...shocking ♪

♪ The bigger the beast the messier the feast, but much to their delight ♪

♪ I give the people what they want ♪

♪ And what they want's a fight ♪ Ah! Ha-ha!

- Excuse me! Anyone knows what's going on?

- He really likes to hear himself sing.

- Yeah, but he has talent.

- Voice of an angel. But the heart of a devil!

- (laughing) - ♪ See the way ♪

♪ The screaming hordes demand it ♪

♪ This spectacle says I've got your back, I'm the savior ♪

♪ I lied and said I caught you all red-handed ♪

♪ Doing something very bad ♪

♪ I then sheltered them from evil ♪

♪ Like my daddy and my daddy's daddy, they think I'm the best ♪

♪ Nothing here is even illegal ♪

♪ They're entertained no one complains ♪

♪ And it keeps me in St-Laurent ♪

♪ I give the people what they want ♪

♪ And what they want is to feel safe here ♪

♪ I keep my crown and make daddy proud ♪

♪ As long as I provide ♪

♪ I give the people what they want and they... ♪

♪ Want you... ♪

♪ To die... ♪♪

- Buh-bye! - (all screaming)

- (grunting) - (groaning)

- (shivering) - (Del grunting)

- Thanks for the jacket, Del. - No problem.

Can't have you turned into a Popsicle out here, now can we? Heh-heh.

- So do you know where we are?

- Better if we don't say. Place is hush-hush, no habla.

- On the down-low. Get it? - (laughing)

- You are so odd. Just tell me this.

How are we gonna get back to finding Charlie?

- I told you, I have contacts everywhere.

One of them happens to be the world's greatest secret agent.

- (Marla laughing) Nice hat.

- His name is Rex Dasher. - And you're sure he'll help us?

- I let him crash in Del's Belle once when everyone wanted him dead,

so he owes me...big-time!

- Okay, let's find this Rex Dancer.

- Dasher. And you don't find him, he finds you.

- Huh? - Rex is brilliant, suave, fun at parties.

Fosters abandoned dogs.

A master of disguise.

Oh, and did I mention... roguishly handsome?

Surprise. Rex Dasher.

(chorus): ♪ Rex Dasher! ♪

- At your service. - Ha-ha!

I love that trick! Never gets old.

Word of advice: in this town, nothing is what it seems.

- Wait. Wh... - Hush.

My enemies have eyes and ears everywhere.

This way!

(chorus): ♪ Rex Dasher! ♪

- After me! Hup!

- Nope. This... this one's just garbage.

Ah!

♪ Man with the plan incognito ♪

♪ He could out-sting a mosquito ♪

♪ Rex Dasher ♪

♪ So dreamy ♪

♪ He's probably right behind you ♪♪

- So your brother's missing. Truth is, he's not the first.

Over the last several months,

a number of citizens from different lands have vanished into thin air.

- Wait. Do you think it's the same people who took my brother?

- I'm 100% almost sure.

We're heading into dangerous territory,

both with the villains and your feelings for me.

Don't deny it. I'm a human lie detector.

- Ugh.

A flower shop? Really?

- Once you look past the roses and carnations,

you'll find the headquarters for a top-secret organization known as SKULL.

The Secret Killers Union of Lethal Lemurs.

The name kind of falls apart at the end,

but they liked the sound of SKULL

and hoped people wouldn't wonder what it stands for.

We get to the top floor, we access their satellite surveillance system.

From there, we'll check yesterday's feed,

and get a visual on where that wagon took your brother.

- Like it. Good plan. And it sounds easy. Right, Rex?

I mean, there's no chance of death or anything, right?

- Well, aside from the multiple levels of security,

unique daily access codes and a laser retina scan,

it should be quite fun!

- Oh, great. When do we start? - We already have.

Dr. Greta Grim.

Tenacious, brilliant, icy,

with only one weakness:

spicy breakfast burritos.

She, and only she, has full access

and can move freely throughout the facility.

Upon entrance into the secret corridor,

she is escorted by her two most trusted lieutenants.

Then she is given the access code to the computer mainframe.

Remember, the key to impersonating Dr. Grim

is her confidence.

She is unwavering.

- Dr. Grim, wait!

We need your expert advice.

- Oh! Uh...not now.

Very busy with the, uh...

...secret doomsday robot submarine thingy...

- Oh, no need.

The Secret Doomsday Robot Submarine Thingy has already launched.

- Wait. Really? - Indeed.

Now we need your expertise with freeze-ray laser cannon.

(dramatic music)

- Ah. Um...

Try adding more...

...ice?

- Oh! - Oh! Yes, yes, yes!

- Why didn't we think of that? - Brilliant!

(exclamations)

- Good show, my dear. - That was close.

Okay, Del, how are those burritos coming?

- People, you can't rush delicious.

- Del, listen to me. Dr. Grim must eat a burrito.

Otherwise, Marla's cover will be completely blown.

- I see her! Uh...she's in my sights!

Oh, I hope your intel's right about her loving these things, Rex!

- Huh. My intel's always right.

Now, lay out the free samples,

and dose them with the sleep serum I gave you.

- I'm on it! It's sleepy time for Dr. Grim.

(straining)

Ugh.

I can't open it. (grunting)

(exclaiming and groaning)

Open, open, open!

- Ooh. Spicy burritos! For free?

Delicious.

- Okay, Rex, I'm at the retina scanner.

Tell me that firewall is down, or there's no way I'm getting in.

- Just a moment.

- Huh. (whispering) Please hurry!

- Guard! - Oh!

- There's emergency on level 1! Report there immediately!

- Oh, I'm just an intern! No, no, no...!

- I'll take that.

Don't hurry back.

Ha-ha. Oh...

Ah...

Ah...

Oh! Retinal scan offline.

(sighing)

- Walk me through this, Rex.

- First, log in with the access codes from the lieutenant.

Then we'll get you to that satellite footage.

- Hmm...

- Okay. Got it!

Come on, come on!

Hi. Come on!

- Dr. Grim! More ice! - (laughter)

- Almost there. C'mon!

Faster, faster!

Da, da! One moment.

- Ah-ahem-hem! - (gasping softly)

- Impostor.

- Oh! I'm not the impostor! She is!

- Ridiculous.

She does not have...mustache.

- Heh-heh-heh.

- You shouldn't have broken in here.

Now we're going to have to torture you. So sorry.

Take her to...the dentist chair.

- What?! No! Wait, please! - (guards laughing)

- (both): Oh! - Rex?!

♪ Rex Dasher! ♪♪

- It's okay to be excited to see me. You're only human.

- There they are! Stop! - Head for the hallway!

- The lighting in here really brings out my eyes!

- Oh! - I can take seven or eight.

Any chance you can take the rest?

- I have a feeling we'll be giving them...

...the cold shoulder.

- You're not allowed in there! - Ha!

- Well played.

- Shocks away! - (tires screeching)

- That was terrifying, but also kind of exhilarating.

Wait! Del! What happened?!

- Ten of them attacked me, poured... poured the serum down my throat,

and they ate all the burritos 'cause they were good, obviously.

And then... Wait. Did we get the footage?

- Unfortunately, no. Don't fret, Marla.

Perhaps being a secret agent is just not your forte.

- Yeah. Totally. Except...

♪ Marla Brenner! ♪♪

In this town, nothing is what it seems.

Yes!

- Guys, we got company!

Hold on!

- Leave it to me! Here, take this.

And best of luck finding your brother.

- Wait! Rex! - I know! You love me!

You don't need to say it with words.

You're already saying it with your eyes.

- Um...I was just gonna say you forgot your sunglasses.

♪ Rex Dasher ♪

♪ So handsome ♪

♪ He's coming to your rescue ♪ - Yeah!

♪ Rex Dasher So handsome ♪

- Whoa! Step on it, Del!

- I love that trick! (laughing)

♪ Rex Dasher! ♪♪

- Bravo, Mr. Dasher.

- Well, hello, ladies.

I didn't realize I had an audience.

Ah. Perfect!

Shaken, not stir...

- Ha. Emperor Maximus,

we have captured Dasher and are returning to the palace.

- Nicely done.

- Ooh! Bathroom, bathroom, bathroom!

Where are you?!

Oh...

- No, no, no! There has to be a mistake!

One more time.

So here's the wagon, and here's us.

And then - poof - the wagon's just...gone?

How can that be? I've watched it a thousand times!

- Mm. Mm. Mm...

- How can you be eating at a time like this?

- Whipping up those spicy burritos must've stirred something in me.

- Oh, I don't get it!

A wagon can't just vanish into thin air.

- C'mon, you're no use to your baby bro

if you die of starvation, hmm...?

- It must've gone somewhere, but where?

- Mm. Mm. Mm...

- Look, sorry if I seem on edge, it's just...

- Mm-hmm.

- Charlie's out there, somewhere, all alone.

I'm supposed to be there for him and...

...I haven't been.

- "Hello." What's that, Mr. Meatball?

"I wanna meet Marla."

Oh, the meatball wants to meet Marla.

Come on, come on.

(high-pitched gibberish)

- Whoa!

These are really good.

- Eh. Made 'em from scratch. - Mm!

You're really talented, Del.

- Ever think about cooking for a living? - (laughing)

I'm not that good. I mean, I'm good.

I've been told I could model, too.

But, you know, I just cook...

...what tastes great to me, which is pretty much everything,

which probably interfered with my modeling.

Oh! Alright, here we are.

We're refueled, I'm refueled. We should go.

- But we don't know where to go!

There's gotta be something in this footage.

- Wait! Stop! Let me see that. - Huh?

- What is it? - Hold on. Uh, back, back. Zoom in.

There!

- Is that what made them disappear? - I don't know.

- But I sure recognize this! - What is that?

- Not a what. It's a who!

And I know exactly where we need to go now!

Ah...come on! Let's mo-ti-vate!

- Wait. Del? - What?

- Uh, just... thanks for everything so far.

- Hey, I should be thanking you.

After all, your bag of Viking coins

is really gonna save my bacon.

(chuckling) Big time!

Whoo-hoo!

We're coming for ya, lil' bro!

(sighing)

- I hope you're doing better than I am, Marla.

- (grunting and groaning) - Uh...

Oh...whoa!

- (sighing) - Ook-Ook.

- Uh... - Ook-Ook.

- Uh! Uh... - Repulsive!

I will not spend another nanosecond with this lower life form.

- Arrogant talk coming from a gutless bounty hunter!

- (roaring) - (rumbling)

- Eh...

Stow ye tempers.

There be a common enemy facing all of us,

that horrible beastie!

Look around, will ya?

There's a reason we were all captured.

We're the toughest of the tough, the baddest of the lot.

Aye.

And there be strength in numbers.

- Oh, I hate to say it, but the pirate's right.

We can survive together.

After all, who among us hasn't spit in death's face

100 times in just the last month and lived to tell about it?!

(laughter)

- Oh...yeah! - (laughing)

- Uh... - Wookoo! Wookookoo!

- Yeah! - (rumbling)

(roaring)

- Aye, no time to waste.

There be some escaping to do.

(laughter)

(Del): Ah, yes, city of the future.

Take it all in, Marla!

- This is amazing! - Ha-ha!

Pretty wonderful, right? Am I right? I'm right.

Alright, let's do this!

- Whoa. - Hey, good to see you!

Wow, your head looks thinner.

Hey, keep it close. This shouldn't take long.

- Whoa! This is so cool. - Marla, Marla.

- Hey, uh, they don't like that. - Pfft!

- Let's go. - Pfft!

- It's like one of those stress balls.

Someone gave me one once. It didn't help.

Oh!

- (club music playing) - A club?

- Hey, careful, you might be having a good time.

Hey! Hi! Ha-ha! What's going on?

- I'm not really in the mood to dance right now.

- We're here to see Glinara!

- What?! Glinara?!

- This is her club, but...but it's all a front.

She's got her hands in everything illegal,

including black-market tech.

- Come on. - O-okay.

I just didn't realize we were seeing her so soon.

- Relax, Marla.

Ha-ha! What's up?

Tell the boss Del's here to see her.

I have her money.

- Uh...

- I got a Del down here askin' to see Miss G.

- No, not Adele. That'd be awesome. - But what if...

- No, just Del. Yeah, yeah. - What if we don't have enough?

- What are you talking about? Trust me.

You have enough gold in that bag to pay off my debt

and buy the info we need about Charlie.

Because if you didn't, we wouldn't get outta here alive.

- Huh. - Del!

She's ready. Let's go.

- You see? - Uh...Del?

I really think we should talk about this first.

- Will you stop worrying? We're perfectly safe.

Deep down, Glinara is a completely delightful...

- Whoa! - (exclamation)

- Oh, my... Oh. - (robot groaning)

- I want umbrellas in my drinks!

- Hey, are you alright? - Ow!

- Here, let me help you up. (grunting)

Oh, poor little robot.

Hey, it's okay.

We're not gonna hurt you. We're not scary. I promise.

- Dude! You took quite a spill. You okay?

(indistinct robot chatter)

- Del! Get up here already!

- Gotta go, gotta go!

- Delightful, huh?

- There she is, my Glinara! Look at you!

Give me a couple coins. I'm gonna need 'em.

- Oh, um...here.

- You look amazing!

I mean, just as radiant as ever. Mwah, mwah!

- Ah, can the sweet talk, Del.

You know I always glow during molting season. Hmm...

- Um... Oh! - Who are you?

- A little tight. Um...

- I'm...I'm Marla. Oh! - Oh, you thought I cared?

- Ha! You're hilarious! - Ow!

- Now, where's my money, Del? - Huh!

- Please don't make me do something I don't want to do.

- Relax! You're gonna get back double what I owe you.

- Oh! So shiny!

Oh, my little Viking gold. Who loves you more than I do?

- Double? Okay. - Nobody.

- Uh, Del? - Glinny, I just need some help.

I saw your logo on some high-tech, disappearing-gizmo thing.

- A disappearing... Ah!

(chuckling) Why would I tell you about illegal cloaking devices?

If I knew, which of course I don't.

- Oh...what's that behind your ear?

(gasping, then squealing)

(laughing)

- Del! You, rascal, you!

Robotitron, get over here!

(indistinct robot chatter)

- Show me the black-market files. - (indistinct robot chatter)

- Uh-huh-huh. Hmm-hmm-hmm.

Oh, yes, looks like I did sell cloaking devices. Who knew? Ah...

Oh, Maximus...

- Whoa-whoa-whoa-whoa. You mean Emperor Maximus?

- Who's that? - Oh, Emperor Maximus

is the supreme ruler of Constantinopolis and my number-one client.

- Well, your client has my brother, and we're going to get him back!

- Oh, cupcake, if Maximus has your brother,

that means he's fighting in the coliseum tomorrow night!

- Fighting? Tomorrow?! Del, we need to go now!

- Forget something? The rest of my money?!

- Okay, okay. Easy, easy. (chuckling)

I'm a man of my word.

Marla, the rest of the gold coins if you will.

- Um, yeah, about that...

We should've really discussed this.

- Marla? Stop messing around. Let go.

- You let go! - Would you...

- You don't want to do this! - Oh, yes, I do. I really do!

- No, you...don't!

- What the heck is... What the heck is this?!

Is this a spoon?! Where's...where's the money?

- Del, I'm so sorry, but...I never had the money.

- Marla, you...you lied to me?

- I had to do everything I could to save my brother. Even lie!

I was gonna tell you. I'm...I'm sorry!

- Whap, whap, whap! Guess you got taken for a ride, Del. Hmm?

And since you don't have my money,

it looks like this is your last stop!

- Uh, Glinara? Please! (laughing)

Hey, c'mon. We can work something out.

- He has nothing to do with this! He was just helping me! Please! Oh!

- If I were you, and I'm glad I'm not,

I'd worry less about your brother

and more about what I'm gonna do to the two you.

- (Charlie): Whoa! - Toss me the janglers.

Ugh. The keys. Toss me the keys.

Thank ye. (snickering)

- Uh...are they gonna be okay? - Don't worry.

They'll wake up in... 12 to 48 hours.

- C'mon! C'mon! Hurry now!

- Whoo-hoo-hoo! - Shhh! Keep it down!

Now's our chance!

- Ook-Ook, you're up. - Ook!

- Show us where the fishies swim!

- Ook, Ook, Ook. - Well, now that's cute. But no.

Not how do fishies swim, where do fishies swim!

- Ook-Ook. (sniffing)

- On with ye now! - Fishies! Me want fishies!

- (laughing) - Look at him go!

- Follow that hairy beast!

(creature howling)

- Fishies! - Oh, good job, Ook-Ook.

- Me want fishies!

- Okay! - Whoa!

- Which boat do we take? - Ha!

Nah, we be escapin' in style.

- Wow! A real-life pirate ship!

- Not just any pirate ship.

Me own girl, the Thunderous Eel!

(laughing)

♪ No, I'm not the scoundrel I appear to be ♪

♪ I'm just a sailor an occasional thief ♪

♪ I'm the finest of captains that ever be ♪

Ha-ha! ♪ The open sea ♪

♪ She's callin' me... ♪♪

- (exclaiming) - Ook-Ook!

- Oh! Oh. - Ook-Ook?

- Bad Ook-Ook! - Ook?

- Bloodbones! - More like crushed bones.

- Oh, no! Wake up! - (bell clanging)

- Stop! - Aye!

- We need to set sail. Now!

- Come on, Captain. - Come on, wake up!

- Oh, it's no use. He's out cold!

- Oh, no! What do we do?! Who's gonna sail the ship?!

- You! - Me?

- Vikings are the most steadfast sailors in all the land!

- You can sail us out of here, Viking!

- Ook-Ook! (chuckling) - Oh, uh, right.

- Get them! Hurry!

- We stand ready for your order, Captain Charles!

- Hurry, Viking! - Uh...

(snoring)

- You can do this, Charlie. Just think it through.

- Ook!

- It's now or never, Captain!

- Um...okay! Let's pull on, uh...

...that rope, that one and...that one!

- Aye, aye, Captain!

- Ha-ha! Let's cut and run!

- Ook-Ook!

- Ha-ha! - Yes!

- We're moving! - We did it!

- Ook-Ook! - Yes! It worked! (laughing)

- They're getting away! Stop them!

Halt! Stop!

- That's it! Whoo! - Ha-ha-ha-ha! Whoo-hoo!

- We're sailing! - Whoo-hoo!

- Yes, we are! Yeah-ha-ha!

- Yeah! - Good instinct, Viking!

- (laughing) If Marla could only see me now.

- (screaming) - Um...

(exclamations)

- Oh, that almost worked.

(laughing) Almost.

- (guards laughing) - (groaning)

- What'd I miss?

- Del, I know what I did was wrong.

- How many times can I say I'm sorry? - (Del humming)

- But we need to work together if we're gonna get out of this.

- Is someone talking to me?

I don't know, because I've blocked out all liars and traitors,

so I can't hear anything from people that are jerks.

- Pipe down, you two!

Now, where is the top destination

for double-crossers this season?

- Glinara! Slug Muffin! - Hmm. Ooh.

The scorching desert of Pharaoh Dunes?

Ooh, you are gonna burn!

- (Del laughing) Come on! - No, no, no! Not there, not there!

- Or maybe the unforgiving, frigid terrain of Yeti Tundra!

- Oh, come on! - No!

- Better yet... Oh! The volcanoes of Pompeii Plaza!

Yes! (maniacal laughter)

- No, no! Come on, Glinara, please!

If you have even one decent bone in your body, you can't do this!

- I don't have bones in my body, thank you very much. (laughing)

- No, no, no! - Please! Glinara!

- Buh-bye! (laughing)

- Oh, I love this part! - Del! Ah!

(screaming)

- (grunting) - Huh?!

- Oh! - (indistinct robot chatter)

- You saved us, little guy! Thank you! - Oh, thank you, buddy!

- Robotitron! How dare you?!

- Ha-ha-ha! Ow. Oh, my.

- (Marla): Whoa! Ah! Whoa! - Oh, no, no.

(screaming)

- Go! Hurry up! Get 'em!

- Come on! Let's go, boys! - (screaming)

- Whoa...! Hold on!

- Changing channel, changing channel, changing.

- Changing. - (Del shouting)

(Del): Ah! Sharks!

- No, flowers! - Flowers!

- (maniacal laughter) - Go back to the flowers!

Oh! Don't let go!

(maniacal laughter)

(crow cawing)

(screaming)

(exclaiming and grunting)

- Ow! - (screaming)

(indistinct robot chatter)

(exclaiming)

- Oh...yes! Yes! We made it!

We're alive! We're alive!

Oh! And now we know where Charlie is!

We still have a full day to get to him.

We can do this! Oh!

Is that a fairytale castle?!

Yes! If we can find help at the castle, then we can...

- We?! I'm sorry, I...I keep hearing "we." There is no we!

Not anymore, Marla! This little adventure of ours is over!

(indistinct robot chatter)

- You lied to me! - Ugh! Del, come on!

Would you have helped me for no money?!

- Would I have helped you? How dare you?

- (both grunting) - Probably not.

I probably wouldn't have helped you.

But...that's not the point. (grunting)

That is the point.

I mean, is there anyone's life you don't ruin, Marla?

- (sighing) - (crow cawing)

- Good luck finding your brother! I really do mean that.

- Del! Del, wait! - But I also hope you don't find me.

- I can't do this without you. Del!

- (robot): Del. - Well, fine!

If that's the way you want it, Robotitron's gonna help me...

...find Charlie.

- (people moaning) - Well, look who it is!

My little rotten runaways. (laughing) How's that taste?

Oh, oh, oh!

I see you're taking stock of your new accommodations.

See what I did with the words? Alright, let's go.

Where are the rose pedals?!

- This is all my fault. - Ya think?!

- I just wanted an adventure,

to have some fun with my sister for once.

Marla. I don't even know where she is.

I hope she's not in trouble too.

- Or eaten by a shark. - What?! Don't say that!

- I'm sorry. - (Charlie sighing)

- My sister and I got into a huge fight.

I bet...she hates me now.

- I, too, miss my sisters back in Amazonia.

The fights we had amongst ourselves were legend!

But we loved each other fiercely as well.

- Out of the way! Move along! Fresh meat coming through!

- (crowd booing) - (grunting)

- Alright, alright, I'm coming!

Ugh. Ugh.

(grunting)

How's my hair?

(gasping) You're the missing warriors.

Secret Agent Rex Dasher.

- ♪ Rex Dash... ♪ - Oh!

(laughter)

- At your service.

I was on a mission to rescue you all.

And this brute must be - ha! - Charlie the Viking!

Ah, your sister Marla is coming for you, my good man.

- You know Marla? - Know her?

I served side-by-side with her.

She's battled all manner of deadly foe

and unspeakable danger to find you.

- Wow. - (laughing)

- Sounds like a true Amazonian!

- She'd make a great bounty hunter.

- Ha-ha! Tell us about this amazing lass!

- Ook-Ook! - (groaning)

- Charlie? What are you doin', lad?

- Argh! I need...to find my...

- ...sister! - (exclamations)

- Stop! - (exclamations)

- Emergency! Emperor!

- Ah, are you kidding me? Now what?

(gasping) Oh, my! Where...

Where did they go? What am I paying you for?! Get them!

- (Charlie): Let's go! - (exclamations)

- They're on our tail!

(all): Shuffle, shuffle, shuffle, shuffle, shuffle!

- Oh! Oh! Oh! - Shuffle, shuffle, shuffle, shuffle!

- Let's go! - (exclamations)

- And heave! - Look out!

- Okay, we need to turn! - Hard left!

(exclamations)

(all): Whoa...!

(screaming and grunting)

(moaning)

(guards shouting)

- We're surrounded! We're not gonna make it!

- Come on, guys, we're not done yet!

- (roaring) - Ladies first.

- (exclamations) - Tally-ho!

- Charles, what are you doing? - Get down here this instant!

- We ain't leavin' ya behind!

- Let me do this. I owe you guys.

- You're a great warrior Viking. - You're alright, kid.

- Go! Go!

(roaring)

- Ah...ah... - (grunting)

- Hey, droopy, up. Up on the corner. Ah...

You think you're so brave,

letting your co-stars escape?

Well, Mr. Big Shot, in one hour,

it'll be a one-man show where you're fighting for your life in my arena!

All...by...your...lonesome!

(moaning and groaning)

(grunting)

- You okay, buddy? You're sounding a little squeaky.

- No. Okay.

- We're going to find help.

I-I think the castle is...this way.

- (wolf howling) - Uh...

This...way?

- Okay. Okay.

(grunting)

- We gotta be close.

(sighing) How long...

...have we been walking?

- (exclamations) - Ah! Whoa! Oof!

Oh! Ow!

Argh...!

Oh, I am so sorry. Are...are you okay?

- My arm. - Let me get that for you.

- I'm fine. - Is that better?

- Yes. - That was my fault. I...

(sighing) Wait a second. No!

No, this can't be right!

We're right back where we started!

- This can't possibly get any worse! - (thunder crashing)

Oh, come on!

(indistinct robot chatter)

- (grunting) - Ow!

What the...?

- What was that? - Careful. Careful.

- Ah... - Who...who's there?

(moaning)

Whoa-ho-ho!

- Ugh. Ow!

- Wow! - Who are you?

- Really? The gown-and-wand ensemble?

The shimmering glow? The floating in the air?

None of that gave it away?

Hello? I'm a fairy godmother.

- Oh. Ooh.

Sorry about that. (chuckling)

- No worries. Easy fix.

Wait a minute. You're the voice that I heard.

- Yeah...that was me. - Well...

people are usually so excited to see a fairy godmother,

they generally don't hurl things at my face.

For instance, the bearded guy I ran into a few hours ago...

- Del? - ...would not stop hugging me.

- You saw Del? Is he okay?

- No. Sadly, the wolves got him.

- What?! - (laughing) Kidding. Kidding.

Jeez. Calm down. Come on.

What kind of a fairy godmother would I be?

I gave him a wish and I sent him on his way.

- A wish? - That's what I do.

I find people who seem lost and set them on the right path.

I'm amazing.

- Okay, great! I've got until sundown to save my brother.

Can you please use that wand to zap him back to me?

- Ha! No. My wishes don't quite work like that.

I mean, Cinderella got her gown,

but she still had to go to the ball herself.

- I've tried doing it myself. But look at me, I'm a wreck.

- Girl, we gotta change that attitude.

Now, come on, step into my office.

It's a place where wishes come true.

(birdsong)

- (neighing) - (robot): Wow.

- How did I not find this place?

- Sometimes we don't see what's right in front of us.

- (robot): Wow, wow, wow. - Also, it's magic.

There's still time to save Charlie.

But first, you'll need to believe you can.

♪ You're allowed to feel ♪

♪ However you feel ♪

♪ You don't always have to hide your tears ♪

♪ Even if today doesn't go your way ♪

♪ I bet I'll get you smiling ear to ear ♪

Whoo!

♪ Everybody has their days I know we gonna be okay ♪

♪ You don't have to be afraid ♪

- Whoa...

♪ When the rain falls down upon this ♪

♪ I won't run ♪

♪ Run like the river ♪

Now, let's get you cleaned up!

Zippity...zappity...zoo!

♪ Run like the river ♪

♪ I believe in you ♪

♪ You'll know what to do ♪

♪ Be the hero that's like no one else ♪

- Whoa! Whoa!

♪ You've been here before ♪

♪ Closin' every door ♪

♪ Happiness is what you owe yourself ♪

♪ Everybody has their days ♪

♪ I know we gonna be okay ♪

♪ You don't have to be afraid ♪

♪ When the rain falls down upon this ♪

- Good day, milady. - Good morning, sir.

- (robot laughing) - ♪ Run like the river ♪

- Um, hello, birdies. - ♪ When the rain falls down ♪

♪ Upon this... ♪♪

- Good day! - Thank you.

- Missed me. Take that!

- (laughter) - Gotcha!

- Whoa! - (laughter)

Oh, okay. En garde!

(laughter)

- You having fun yet, or what? - Whoo-hoo!

(laughing) What exactly are they doing?

- Getting you ready for a party. A rescue party! Let's go!

Get up there, Marla.

- (Marla laughing) - No excuses, girl, c'mon!

Ta-dah!

- Whoa! Is that it?

Constantinopolis?

It's so much closer than I thought!

(sighing) I hope I can do this.

- This girl believed anything was possible.

♪ You can do it ♪

♪ Nothin' to it ♪

♪ Say I believe ♪

- I...believe?

♪ You deserve it Know you're worth it ♪

- Is that for me?

Whoa...

- Yes, it's for you.

- I'll be the girl...I used to be.

- Now you're starting to get it!

- I can do this!

♪ You can do it ♪

♪ Nothin' to it ♪

♪ Say I believe ♪

- I believe!

- It's time to fly!

- I promise I'll be the girl... - Whoo!

- ...I used to be!

- (laughing) - (neighing)

- Ha-ha!

- Go get Charlie!

- Thank you.

♪ When the rain falls down ♪

♪ I won't run ♪♪

I'm coming for you, little bro!

(metal groaning and clanking)

- Ah... Huh?

What the...?! Ah! (groaning)

Ah. Huh? (sighing)

- Is that too tight?

- Actually, yeah. - Good!

(creature roaring)

- Ah, the show's about to start!

- Ah! (coughing) What is that?!

- Just a blend of savory herbs and spices.

It's gonna make ya extra tasty for the beastie. (laughing)

- Ah! Ah!

(grunting)

Marla...I need you.

Huh.

(crowd cheering)

- Okay, ready for this?

- Uh-huh!

- Thank you!

- Bye-bye. - Bye!

- Thank you.

- Whoa.

So it's...heavily guarded and impossibly tall.

As Amelia Earhart once said,

"Adventure is worthwhile in itself."

(indistinct robot chatter)

- It's just something I used to do. Let...let's go.

(epic music)

- Hey! Who goes there?!

- Aha! - Ah!

- Huh? - Hi-yah!

(guard screaming)

- Walk it off, big guy! - (guard exclaiming)

(crowd cheering)

(background chatter)

- ...was broken by a cartful of watermelons!

Let the other guards know immediately. Go, go, go!

- We need to blend in.

Hmm...

- Let's go. Ready. Ready! - (laughing)

- Love the disguise, buddy, but, uh, you still stick out like a sore thumb.

Stay put. I'll be back for you once I get Charlie.

- Danger, danger.

- Don't worry, I'll be fine.

- I'll see you soon. - Bye-bye.

- Not if I can help it. - ...that fits this description?

They are wearing a backpack with a sword sticking out of...

- Do you mean like that?

- Hey! Hey, you!

Stop at once!

Guards! I spotted an intruder inside our very city!

Go now! Go!

(chuckling)

(creature growling)

- Charlie?

Oh...Charlie?!

Oh!

Charlie!

- (fanfare) - (crowd cheering)

- Hey, chop-chop! Let's go!

Bring me the stepstool! Take it! Come on!

- No way! You take it! - You take it!

- It's not my job! - Take it right now.

- I'm not taking it. - I am letting go!

- My hands are in the air! - Do it!

- No. No. - Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes!

(fanfare)

(wild cheering)

- (crowd chanting): Maximus! - Oh! Charlie?

Oh!

(cheering)

- Whoo! - (all): Maximus! Maximus!

- (all): Maximus! - Maximus! We want Maximus!

- Ha-ha! Aw, you're all cheering for me and I love it!

(laughing) I love it, I love it, I love it!

Make sure I'm outta here before any of this riffraff can touch me.

And now...

...the moment you've all been waiting for!

I give you...

...Charles the Destroyer!

(crowd cheering)

- Ah...

(grunting)

Huh...uh...

- I, Emperor Maximus of Constantinopolis,

declare the games...

- ...open! - (whistling)

- What?!

Oh! Hey! Who do you think... Oh! Oh-ho!

- Uh... - Oh! Ah! Hey!

(all gasping)

(crowd cheering)

- Uh... - (cheering)

- Wait! - Yah!

- Huh? - (triumphant music)

- Marla?

Marla! Oh!

- (all): Ooh! - Oh, Charlie!

Thank goodness I found you!

- You're the knight! You're really the noble knight!

- What a treat.

We have a special guest for tonight's show!

(laughing) Don't worry.

You can all pay extra for it on the way out.

Now, release the beast!

(cheering)

- (growling) - (shuddering)

- Here he comes, here he comes, here he comes, here he comes,

here he comes, here he comes!

- Um...Marla?

- Alright, Charlie, we got this!

(growling softly)

(growling)

- Marla, is that a T-Rex?!

- Charlie...run!

- (both screaming) - (roaring)

(both exclaiming and panting)

- Ha-ha! Turn around!

(laughing) He's behind you!

- (maniacal laughter) - (exclamations)

- (crowd cheering) - (Charlie exclaiming)

- Charlie, catch! - (grunting)

- (crowd cheering) - (triumphant music)

(exclaiming)

- Stay away from my brother!

- (roaring) - (exclaiming)

(grunting and exclamations)

- (roaring) - Ah! Ah!

- (T-Rex snarling) - (both exclaiming)

(musical honking)

- Hey! I think you're part of my carpool.

- No...way! Del!

- Who ordered a food truck?! - (musical honking)

- La-la-la-la-la-la! - Hold on!

Let's make this dino...sore.

- Wah-wah-wah. - Come on, it wasn't that bad!

(growling)

- (exclaiming) - (roaring)

(exclamations)

- (robot): Excellent! - (laughing)

- Great timing! Oh, it's so good to see you guys!

- Buckle up. I'm getting us outta here.

You're not gonna believe what happened to me.

- I met a fairy godmother. - Hurry up!

- Del, eyes on the road! - And she gave me a wish!

- Come on, you prehistoric pea-brain! Finish them!

- Del... - ...for a thousand breakfast burritos!

- So I paid Glinara back... - It's gaining on us!

- Del, focus! - Double!

And she let me use her transporter to get back here!

(screaming) Hold on back there!

- Argh! Oh!

Ah! Guys! I got a plan!

(grunting)

(straining)

- Come on!

- Del, we're in position. Are you ready?

- Ready! Let's go!

- Okay, brave Viking, this one's for Mom and Dad.

Let's do it like we always used to.

It's time to take down this guy with the...

- Duo... - (both): Slingshot!

(screaming)

- Go, Marla! - (screaming)

Catch me, Charlie! Catch me!

- Oh! Yes! - (laughing)

- Oh. - Marla, I don't think it worked!

- Ha-ha-ha! Finally! The big finale!

- (growling) - (screaming)

(crowd exclaiming and laughing)

(Del): You don't see that every day.

- (Charlie): Awesome! Way to go! - (Marla): Oh, yeah! Whoo-hoo!

(laughter)

- What the heck is going on?! Oh!

Guards, seize my prisoners!

(neighing)

(laughing mockingly)

- (exclamations) - Sorry we're late.

Had to do a bit of vanquishing before we arrived.

- Oh, yeah! We bad!

- Oh! How dare you all?!

Why, if I wasn't all the way up here on this balcony, I would...

- You'd what now? - Oh!

- Believe me, we wanted a fight,

but your soldiers ran away so fast.

- Captain, I...I didn't see you there. (chuckling)

Uh, guards? Anyone? A little help?!

- Yer days of swindlin' and plunderin' are over,

Maxi, old boy.

Toss this urchin in the brig!

- Aye-aye, Cap'n.

- Oh! No. No, no, no!

- Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah!

- Hey, hey, hey, hey! Please don't hurt me. Ah!

Oh, no fair.

(Bloodbones): Ha-ha! Alright!

- (crowd cheering) - Whoo-hoo!

- Captain Bloodbones, you got your crew back!

- Aye, Charles! I gave them a choice:

be eaten alive by a school of piranha,

or work for me!

Two of them chose the piranha!

(both laughing)

- Wow. Marla, look at all these people.

(crowd cheering)

Oh! Who are probably hungry...

...for some food from a food truck!

Burritos!

Meatballs and spicy burritos!

- Whoo-hoo! - (indistinct robot chatter)

Come on down to Del's Belle for the finest spicy burritos...

- Let's go home, Marla. - Sure.

There's just one last thing I have to do.

- Yah! - (crowd exclaiming)

You're no one's prisoner anymore.

You can fly anywhere you want.

(Marla laughing)

(all): Viking and knight! Viking and knight!

Viking and knight!

- Yeah! - (crowd chanting)

Thanks for your help, everybody.

- It was an honor, my friend. - (Charlie laughing)

- And a privilege to work with you, Agent Marla.

- (Marla laughing) - Ook-Ook...!

- Good Ook-Ook. - (laughter)

- Ook-ook-ook. - I guess...this is goodbye.

Whoa! (laughing)

- Ah... - (Marla chuckling)

I'm gonna miss you, Marla.

- Oh... - I mean, I won't miss being chased,

shot at, almost eaten alive.

That...that was...terrifying.

But I will miss you.

Without you, I would never have realized that cooking completes me.

It's who I am. I mean, I'm also a very good singer, but I...I should cook.

Thank you, Marla.

- Thank you, Del. I'll miss you, too.

- Oh... - Oh, it's okay, little guy.

- Oh...

- You won't be alone anymore. You've got Del.

- Oh? - You're family now.

- Family. Family!

(both): Oh...

- I wish we had more time to get to know each other, Viking.

Your moves reminded me of my cooking. You seem like my kind of guy.

- (grunting) - Thank you so much for helping my sister.

- Ah, it was nothing. Well, it wasn't nothing.

It was very dangerous, but I'm happy to do it.

So can I give you guys a ride back?

- (crowd): Burritos! Burritos! - Um, you got some customers.

- (crowd): Burritos! Burritos! - Oh, oh, burrito man, over here!

- Whoa! (laughing) - Coming! Coming!

- I'm coming, people! I'm coming.

- Wait. How are we gonna get back home?

- I...think we already have a ride.

- (Marla laughing) - Whoo-hoo!

- Whoa!

(grunting)

(clucking)

♪ La la la la la la la la... ♪♪

- Marla, I'm really sorry for all the things I said,

and everything I did...

- It's okay, Charlie. You were right.

- I was? - We really were meant to be here.

Viking and knight, side by side.

- Together.

- Look! There it is.

- Yeah! - Whoo-hoo!

(laughter and whooping)

(moaning)

We're back. (gasping)

I have a nose again. Oh...Charlie.

- Marla? - Are you...?

Oh, thank goodness!

- Oh, we're back! - You're you!

- (laughing) - Uh...

Hey. Ha-ha. (panting)

You found your brother.

- Yeah. Yeah, we, uh...

...finally found each other.

- Must've been the scariest five minutes of your life. (sighing)

- Wait. Five?

- Look, uh, I'm glad to see a happy ending, but you gotta go.

- Thank you. - Five minutes? That's insane.

- I know. - We fought a T-Rex!

- Flew on a T-Rex.

- We fought in the Coliseum! - I'm not crazy. Are you crazy?

- I'm not crazy. - Hey! (sighing)

I think you, uh, dropped this.

- Oh, yeah, I...guess I did.

- Thank you. - Thanks.

- Is that your passport? - Yeah.

Oh...

It's all here.

- What?

- It's all here. - Whoa.

Look at all those places.

- Charlie...

there are so many more adventures to come.

Come on, let's go home.

- I sailed a pirate ship!

- Whoa! - It's like...

Well, I only actually got to sail for a minute. But it was amazing!

- Well, I meet a secret agent called Rex Dasher.

- I know! Isn't he the coolest?!

- Uh...yeah.

Yeah. Yeah, he is. No, wait, wait, wait.

So what happened after you got captured?

- Okay, so then the Emperor put us in his stock.

But I used my super strength to break out!

- So I found out about the Emperor... (voices fading)

♪ There is so much world out there ♪

♪ And we got to see it all ♪

♪ No stone unturned ♪

♪ I swear ♪

♪ My bucket list is just too long ♪

♪ We won't stop ♪

♪ Till we've seen ♪

♪ What's beyond the horizon ♪

♪ We can't stop till we've seen ♪

♪ The places we've had our eyes on ♪

♪ Yeah... ♪

♪ You'll see ♪

♪ It's all waiting for you... ♪

♪ And it's waiting for me ♪

♪ It's waiting for you and me ♪♪

(humming)

(fanfare)

(laughter)

- Huh.

(crunching)

(chuckling)

(intense music)

(maniacal laughter)

(Maximus inhaling deeply)

♪ You're probably wondering what you're doing here ♪

I bet you're dying to know. Oops. Bad choice of words.

♪ Who's the stylish lad with the fresh toga gear ♪

Let me explain before the show.

♪ Eyes on me ♪

♪ I am ruler of these masses ♪

♪ Like my daddy and my daddy's daddy before that daddy ♪

♪ Their protection from trespassers ♪

That's you, big guy. ♪ Invented a game ♪

♪ It keeps 'em tame and that's how I stay on top ♪

♪ I give the people what they want... ♪

♪ And what they want's a little...shocking ♪

♪ The bigger the beast the messier the feast, but much to their delight ♪

♪ I give the people what they want ♪

♪ And what they want's a fight ♪

Ha-ha! Ha-ha.

That's my...my evil laugh. (laughing)

Did it scare you? Can you believe that?!

(laughing)

(breathless singing)

(laughing)

♪ You see the way the screaming hordes demand it ♪

♪ This spectacle says I've got your back, I'm the savior ♪

♪ I lied and said I caught you all red-handed ♪

♪ Doing something very bad ♪

♪ I then sheltered them from evil ♪

♪ Like my daddy and my daddy's daddy, they think I'm the best ♪

♪ Nothing here is even illegal ♪

♪ They're entertained, no one complains ♪

♪ And it keeps me in St-Laurent ♪

♪ I give the people what they want... ♪

♪ And what they want is to feel safe here ♪

♪ The world is small within our walls ♪

♪ Outside is a risk ♪

♪ I give the people what they want ♪

♪ And what they want is this ♪

♪ I give the people what they want... ♪

♪ I give the people what they want... ♪

♪ I keep my crown I make daddy proud ♪

♪ As long as I provide ♪

♪ I give the people what they want and they... ♪

♪ Want you... ♪

♪ To die! ♪♪

Buh-bye!

(dramatic music)

- ♪ Who be this, your squire ♪ - (Marla): Excuse me?

- ♪ Is it friend or foe ♪ - We're just gonna go.

♪ No...way ♪

- Whoa!

- ♪ Silly wench, please ♪ - What?!

♪ Go and fetch our hero a flagon of mead Oh, oh... ♪♪

- Are you kidding? - And make haste.

- I'm his sister. And it's late. - (Charlie): Not now! Stop it, Marla!

- So if you woolly mammoths would put him down, that'd be great. Thanks.

He actually has school tomorrow,

and he should've been in bed, like, two hours ago.

♪ Not a chance, he's with us ♪

♪ He has proven himself of value and thus he stays... ♪

(grunting) ♪ We celebrate... ♪

Gentleman, show how we do!

- ♪ Oh, we raise our cups ♪ - ♪ We raise our cups ♪

- ♪ To our hero's might ♪ - ♪ To our hero's might ♪

♪ It's Charles the Destroyer we honor tonight ♪

- ♪ We could all be dead ♪ - ♪ We could all be dead ♪

- ♪ By tomorrow morn ♪ - ♪ By tomorrow morn ♪

♪ It's all for one and one for all, brothers in arms ♪

♪ Brothers in arms, brothers in arms ♪

♪ We are brothers in arms ♪♪

(Charlie): Come on, Marla, this is real!

And everyone thinks I'm great. This is rad!

- (Marla): It's mad! - Well, I'm loving it. I'm gonna stay.

- Charlie, seriously?

Please. Look around. We gotta get back home.

We gotta go now.

- No!

♪ If you can't see this is fun ♪

♪ Then I don't know what you've become ♪

- ♪ Gonna take my place ♪ - ♪ Gonna take his place ♪

- ♪ Brother in arms ♪ - ♪ Brothers in arms ♪

♪ I'm Charles the Destroyer ♪

- ♪ Enemies be warned ♪ - ♪ Enemies be warned ♪

- ♪ Let the feast begin ♪ - ♪ Let the feast begin ♪

1883 01:35:5