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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:02,420 --> 00:00:07,230 - Synced & corrected by MementMori - -- www.addic7ed.com -- 2 00:00:08,292 --> 00:00:10,329 Previously on No Activity... 3 00:00:10,330 --> 00:00:11,859 This thing with the tortoise. 4 00:00:11,860 --> 00:00:14,583 Was it a romantic situation? 5 00:00:14,584 --> 00:00:16,666 - Get out. - That's a yes. 6 00:00:16,667 --> 00:00:17,749 That's a little cheese. 7 00:00:17,750 --> 00:00:18,999 For the little mouse. 8 00:00:19,000 --> 00:00:21,582 - Mmm. - I want to start by saying that, uh... 9 00:00:21,583 --> 00:00:23,199 These corruption stories are true. 10 00:00:23,200 --> 00:00:24,791 REPORTER: The disgraced agent was sentenced 11 00:00:24,792 --> 00:00:26,708 - to six years in prison. - BOTH: Ooh... 12 00:00:26,709 --> 00:00:29,124 Your witness' name isn't Doris Silva, is it? 13 00:00:29,125 --> 00:00:30,582 Yeah. Actually, it is. 14 00:00:30,583 --> 00:00:32,666 This is awkward. She didn't make it. 15 00:00:32,667 --> 00:00:34,619 Goddamn it! 16 00:00:34,620 --> 00:00:37,619 If you are watching this, I have flipped. 17 00:00:37,620 --> 00:00:38,939 - Fuck. - [GLASS BREAKING] 18 00:00:38,940 --> 00:00:41,150 - What was that? - Nothing, Yaya. 19 00:00:42,167 --> 00:00:44,730 [EXHALES] 20 00:00:47,150 --> 00:00:48,499 Okay, come on. 21 00:00:48,500 --> 00:00:50,430 Gonna do this. 22 00:00:52,480 --> 00:00:54,769 Evening. 23 00:00:54,770 --> 00:00:58,289 I, uh... I need to see the chief. 24 00:00:58,290 --> 00:01:02,239 I'm, uh, possessing some information 25 00:01:02,240 --> 00:01:06,679 that will bring down the Las Hormigas Cartel. 26 00:01:06,680 --> 00:01:08,599 Okay. Uh, super. 27 00:01:08,600 --> 00:01:11,320 Uh, just-just have a seat there. 28 00:01:13,020 --> 00:01:15,579 No, no, no, uh, I don't think you understand. 29 00:01:15,580 --> 00:01:17,439 This is a big deal. 30 00:01:17,440 --> 00:01:18,779 Mm-hmm. Absolutely. 31 00:01:18,780 --> 00:01:20,839 And we are excited to hear it. 32 00:01:20,840 --> 00:01:22,289 Uh, please take a seat. 33 00:01:22,290 --> 00:01:24,919 We'll get to you as soon as we can. 34 00:01:24,920 --> 00:01:26,179 This is a flip. 35 00:01:26,180 --> 00:01:28,166 Okay. 36 00:01:28,167 --> 00:01:30,208 OFFICER TOBY: Very good, thank you. 37 00:01:30,209 --> 00:01:33,199 Absolutely, I'll send him back. 38 00:01:33,200 --> 00:01:34,329 Okay. 39 00:01:34,330 --> 00:01:37,119 Michael, with the noise complaint? 40 00:01:37,120 --> 00:01:39,319 - You can head back. - Thanks. 41 00:01:39,320 --> 00:01:40,899 What? 42 00:01:40,900 --> 00:01:42,708 - He just arrived. - Sir? 43 00:01:42,709 --> 00:01:44,999 He was here. He left and he came back. 44 00:01:45,000 --> 00:01:48,042 Come on. Hey, Cop. 45 00:01:49,430 --> 00:01:50,999 Get me a coffee. 46 00:01:51,000 --> 00:01:53,370 Please? 47 00:01:56,720 --> 00:01:58,219 Thank you. 48 00:01:58,220 --> 00:02:00,369 You're welcome. 49 00:02:00,370 --> 00:02:03,059 Oh, God, that smells like shit. 50 00:02:03,060 --> 00:02:04,959 Oh. No, not shit... 51 00:02:04,960 --> 00:02:06,059 what, what am I thinking of? 52 00:02:06,060 --> 00:02:09,040 I'm trying to think of the right analogy. 53 00:02:10,790 --> 00:02:12,479 Oh, great. 54 00:02:12,480 --> 00:02:14,659 There's a hole in my cup... 55 00:02:14,660 --> 00:02:16,749 OFFICER Shots fired! Shots fired! 56 00:02:16,750 --> 00:02:18,875 - OFFICER 2: Take cover! We need medical... - ♪ On the lone prairie... ♪ 57 00:02:18,876 --> 00:02:21,359 This is SDPD, North Central Division. 58 00:02:21,360 --> 00:02:23,419 We have an active shooter situation. 59 00:02:23,420 --> 00:02:24,874 [INDISTINCT RADIO TRANSMISSION] 60 00:02:24,875 --> 00:02:26,541 [LOCK BUZZING] 61 00:02:26,542 --> 00:02:27,708 [CELL DOOR OPENING] 62 00:02:27,709 --> 00:02:30,000 GUARD: All right. Let's go. 63 00:02:44,240 --> 00:02:46,839 I'm sorry for keeping you. 64 00:02:46,840 --> 00:02:48,333 I was podcasting. 65 00:02:48,334 --> 00:02:50,916 I'm Special Agent Dustin Kasprowicz. 66 00:02:50,917 --> 00:02:53,833 - I'm working on a case... - Something smells like dogshit. 67 00:02:53,834 --> 00:02:55,916 I don't smell anything. 68 00:02:55,917 --> 00:02:57,869 Well, I do. I smell dogshit. 69 00:02:57,870 --> 00:03:01,417 - [SIGHS] - Did you step in something? 70 00:03:02,600 --> 00:03:05,159 [CLEARS THROAT] 71 00:03:05,160 --> 00:03:07,899 Says a lot about your character that you had to check. 72 00:03:07,900 --> 00:03:12,139 Well, I wanted to make sure for your sake that I didn't, 73 00:03:12,140 --> 00:03:14,749 and I'm happy to report there's nothing there. 74 00:03:14,750 --> 00:03:18,099 - Well, as a fellow big-nosed guy... - Mm-hmm? 75 00:03:18,100 --> 00:03:20,940 ... I could tell you that you're fibbing. 76 00:03:20,950 --> 00:03:23,119 Because I use this one to smell. 77 00:03:23,120 --> 00:03:25,559 [LONG SNIFF] 78 00:03:25,560 --> 00:03:28,499 And I smell animal shit. 79 00:03:28,500 --> 00:03:30,958 [SNIFFS] I don't smell anything at all. 80 00:03:30,959 --> 00:03:33,666 - Smell deep. [LONG SNIFF] - Now keep in mind, 81 00:03:33,667 --> 00:03:35,749 I just came in from outside. 82 00:03:35,750 --> 00:03:38,999 So I'm still smelling, you know, freedom? 83 00:03:39,000 --> 00:03:40,959 And maybe that's what's clogging it up. 84 00:03:40,960 --> 00:03:42,699 Well, I'll tell you what's not inside, 85 00:03:42,700 --> 00:03:44,940 is animals that shit on the floor. 86 00:03:44,950 --> 00:03:46,859 So maybe you stepped on something. 87 00:03:46,860 --> 00:03:49,205 - I doubt it. - So take your fuckin' shoes off 88 00:03:49,206 --> 00:03:50,819 - if you want to continue. - Excuse me? 89 00:03:50,820 --> 00:03:52,208 Take my shoes off? 90 00:03:52,209 --> 00:03:53,769 I'll wait. 91 00:03:53,770 --> 00:03:55,769 You can hand them to Phil over here. 92 00:03:55,770 --> 00:03:57,980 Phil's my guy. 93 00:03:59,430 --> 00:04:00,829 [SIGHS] 94 00:04:00,830 --> 00:04:03,042 Thank you. 95 00:04:05,130 --> 00:04:06,859 There you go. So... 96 00:04:06,860 --> 00:04:10,167 - I'm working a case that is... - [TSKING] Let's wait. 97 00:04:12,920 --> 00:04:14,319 What were you gonna say? 98 00:04:14,320 --> 00:04:16,299 Anyway, I'm working on a case 99 00:04:16,300 --> 00:04:17,620 - that I think... - I... got to tell you 100 00:04:17,630 --> 00:04:18,791 the smell's still there. 101 00:04:18,792 --> 00:04:20,292 I think it's in your socks. 102 00:04:20,293 --> 00:04:22,199 You know what? 103 00:04:22,200 --> 00:04:24,949 Let's just... nip this right in the bud. 104 00:04:24,950 --> 00:04:27,279 Here you go, pal. Thanks. 105 00:04:27,280 --> 00:04:29,439 I think it's "nip this in the butt." 106 00:04:29,440 --> 00:04:31,099 I don't think it is. I think you're... 107 00:04:31,100 --> 00:04:33,959 - that is, you've been misinformed. - What's a bud? 108 00:04:35,080 --> 00:04:36,579 - A plant? - Yeah. 109 00:04:36,580 --> 00:04:38,369 You're gonna nip something in the plant? 110 00:04:38,370 --> 00:04:40,499 What, are you gonna nip it in the butt? What does that mean? 111 00:04:40,500 --> 00:04:41,899 [SNAPS FINGERS] 112 00:04:41,900 --> 00:04:43,179 That's a nip? 113 00:04:43,180 --> 00:04:44,709 Like a kid who's getting out of control. 114 00:04:44,710 --> 00:04:46,159 "I told you again to stop. 115 00:04:46,160 --> 00:04:48,259 Oh, you're gonna keep... I told you... [SNAPS FINGERS] 116 00:04:48,260 --> 00:04:49,708 I'm gonna nip that in the butt." 117 00:04:49,709 --> 00:04:51,374 - We can agree to disagree. - Yeah. 118 00:04:51,375 --> 00:04:52,834 No doubt. You do look familiar. 119 00:04:52,835 --> 00:04:54,739 - Uh... - Have we met? 120 00:04:54,740 --> 00:04:56,079 I don't think so. 121 00:04:56,080 --> 00:04:57,666 I mean, we were both in law enforcement, 122 00:04:57,667 --> 00:04:59,583 so, perhaps our paths crossed. 123 00:04:59,584 --> 00:05:00,833 I think I know what it is. 124 00:05:00,834 --> 00:05:04,199 - Hmm. - It was the FBI/DEA joint raid 125 00:05:04,200 --> 00:05:05,959 at the, um, what the fuck was it? 126 00:05:05,960 --> 00:05:07,699 Uh, the Pine... the, uh... 127 00:05:07,700 --> 00:05:09,582 - The, the mortuary. - Resting Pines Mortuary. 128 00:05:09,583 --> 00:05:11,329 - I was at that. - I was at that, too. 129 00:05:11,330 --> 00:05:12,819 With the little girl with the, uh, with the, uh... 130 00:05:12,820 --> 00:05:14,208 - BOTH: Missile launcher! - [CHUCKLING]: Yeah! 131 00:05:14,209 --> 00:05:16,739 I... 132 00:05:16,740 --> 00:05:17,979 I killed that girl's... 133 00:05:17,980 --> 00:05:19,623 I killed that little girl's father. [CHUCKLES] 134 00:05:19,624 --> 00:05:20,899 - That was you? - That was me, man. 135 00:05:20,900 --> 00:05:23,499 - Oh, dude. Well done. - Thanks, man. 136 00:05:23,500 --> 00:05:24,999 You're looking at the guy that killed her mother. 137 00:05:25,000 --> 00:05:26,542 - Bullshit. - Absolutely. 138 00:05:26,543 --> 00:05:28,789 Boom. Scoped her. 139 00:05:28,790 --> 00:05:29,809 - Buddy. - That's cool, man. 140 00:05:29,810 --> 00:05:30,819 - That's really cool. - Holy cow. 141 00:05:30,820 --> 00:05:32,332 - That's cool. Yeah. - I am shocked we didn't meet. 142 00:05:32,333 --> 00:05:33,819 Hey, I'm sorry I was fucking with you earlier. 143 00:05:33,820 --> 00:05:35,207 - Hey, man. - I shouldn't have. You're a cool guy. 144 00:05:35,208 --> 00:05:36,459 We should've figured that out at the beginning. 145 00:05:36,460 --> 00:05:38,299 - Yeah. Water under the bridge. - This would've gone a lot smoother. 146 00:05:38,300 --> 00:05:39,309 - Okay, so... - What can I help you with? 147 00:05:39,310 --> 00:05:40,579 - ... here's what I'm here for. - Talk to me. 148 00:05:40,580 --> 00:05:42,289 I'm chasing El Chappie 149 00:05:42,290 --> 00:05:43,939 and the Las Hormigas gang. 150 00:05:43,940 --> 00:05:45,873 We've got an in right now with the Devils, 151 00:05:45,874 --> 00:05:48,279 which is a biker gang that does a lot of their grunt work, 152 00:05:48,280 --> 00:05:51,159 where this guy comes into play. 153 00:05:51,160 --> 00:05:52,820 Recognize him? 154 00:05:54,280 --> 00:05:55,659 Yeah, that's Chief. 155 00:05:55,660 --> 00:05:57,160 - Sweetheart. Good guy. - Good. 156 00:05:57,170 --> 00:05:59,079 So. Here is a... 157 00:05:59,080 --> 00:06:00,979 - updated picture. - Aw, ahh... 158 00:06:00,980 --> 00:06:03,399 This is the fifth guy we've lost in the last year. 159 00:06:03,400 --> 00:06:04,582 He was gonna flip. 160 00:06:04,583 --> 00:06:07,164 Now we're fucked. Their shipment's about to come in, 161 00:06:07,165 --> 00:06:08,199 and once it they get it, 162 00:06:08,200 --> 00:06:09,373 - boom, they're ghosts. - All right, okay. 163 00:06:09,374 --> 00:06:10,659 Oh, well, what you need to do, then, 164 00:06:10,660 --> 00:06:11,949 you need to talk to his partner. 165 00:06:11,950 --> 00:06:13,699 [SCOFFS] I didn't even know he had a partner. 166 00:06:13,700 --> 00:06:15,019 - That's great. - Yeah. 167 00:06:15,020 --> 00:06:17,859 Uh, where would I find him, 168 00:06:17,860 --> 00:06:19,791 - and what is his name? - His partner's name 169 00:06:19,792 --> 00:06:21,099 is, uh... Fuck. What the fuck? 170 00:06:21,100 --> 00:06:23,499 Uh, his partner's name is why the fuck would I tell you? 171 00:06:23,500 --> 00:06:26,179 You're nothing to me. 172 00:06:26,180 --> 00:06:27,879 Put your socks on. 173 00:06:27,880 --> 00:06:29,399 And your shoes. 174 00:06:29,400 --> 00:06:31,375 You're embarrassing yourself. 175 00:06:32,600 --> 00:06:33,709 I'll wait. 176 00:06:37,200 --> 00:06:39,350 [CLEARS THROAT] 177 00:06:43,420 --> 00:06:45,499 [SIGHS] Okay. 178 00:06:45,500 --> 00:06:48,291 Shoes on, so let's get... 179 00:06:48,292 --> 00:06:50,949 Perfect. 180 00:06:50,950 --> 00:06:54,860 ♪ 181 00:07:03,280 --> 00:07:06,584 [SNORING] 182 00:07:07,640 --> 00:07:10,909 DISPATCH: Car 34, please report. 183 00:07:10,910 --> 00:07:13,709 Car 34, no activity. 184 00:07:13,710 --> 00:07:15,539 Copy that. 185 00:07:15,540 --> 00:07:17,399 I think the rain has scared the business away, 186 00:07:17,400 --> 00:07:18,999 and the girls have called it a night. 187 00:07:19,000 --> 00:07:20,719 Pretty boring. 188 00:07:20,720 --> 00:07:22,839 Well, my grandpa always said that the best way 189 00:07:22,840 --> 00:07:25,460 to get rid of boredom is to split it with a friend. 190 00:07:25,470 --> 00:07:27,539 Yeah, that'd be great, except my friend here 191 00:07:27,540 --> 00:07:29,539 is, uh, fast asleep. 192 00:07:29,540 --> 00:07:30,899 Moses is sleeping? 193 00:07:30,900 --> 00:07:32,579 [LAUGHS] That guy's hilarious. 194 00:07:32,580 --> 00:07:34,079 Let me ask you, does he have his pillow? 195 00:07:34,080 --> 00:07:36,059 Yeah. Yeah, he brought his own pillow. 196 00:07:36,060 --> 00:07:37,791 Who brings their own pillow to work? 197 00:07:37,792 --> 00:07:39,439 What kind of message does that send? 198 00:07:39,440 --> 00:07:41,160 Hey, he's a character, that's for sure. 199 00:07:41,170 --> 00:07:44,119 All right, well, I'm always here if you want to chew the fat. 200 00:07:44,120 --> 00:07:45,739 Well, actually, uh, while I got you there, 201 00:07:45,740 --> 00:07:46,939 do you have any information 202 00:07:46,940 --> 00:07:50,219 on the, uh, the Doris Silva case? 203 00:07:50,220 --> 00:07:51,819 Doris Silva. 204 00:07:51,820 --> 00:07:55,123 Uh, extradited prisoner, murdered earlier this month. 205 00:07:55,124 --> 00:07:56,879 Yeah. Is there any update on that? 206 00:07:56,880 --> 00:07:58,639 Anything you can tell me, like, uh, 207 00:07:58,640 --> 00:08:01,259 where the detectives are looking or... ? 208 00:08:01,260 --> 00:08:03,749 Sorry, friend. I can't share anything 209 00:08:03,750 --> 00:08:05,679 on the, uh, Silva case. I'm sorry. 210 00:08:05,680 --> 00:08:07,499 - I know that's tough. - Oh, man, 211 00:08:07,500 --> 00:08:10,119 you have no idea. I used to be a detective. 212 00:08:10,120 --> 00:08:12,239 You know, I'm trying to climb my way back up, so if you have 213 00:08:12,240 --> 00:08:14,479 any kind of information, it could really help me. 214 00:08:14,480 --> 00:08:15,839 Please, man. Please. 215 00:08:15,840 --> 00:08:17,309 If you could give me anything at all, 216 00:08:17,310 --> 00:08:19,659 I would just owe you big-time. 217 00:08:19,660 --> 00:08:21,439 Oh, man, I... [SIGHS] 218 00:08:21,440 --> 00:08:24,229 I know shouldn't, but... all right. 219 00:08:24,230 --> 00:08:25,239 All right. Let me see what I can do. 220 00:08:25,240 --> 00:08:26,559 Thank you, man. Thank you so much. 221 00:08:26,560 --> 00:08:28,439 I would really appreciate that. 222 00:08:28,440 --> 00:08:29,839 I really appreciate it. Thanks, man. 223 00:08:29,840 --> 00:08:32,319 I'll talk to you soon. Thank you. 224 00:08:32,320 --> 00:08:35,439 - [SNORING] - Sorry, man. Was I talking too loud? 225 00:08:35,440 --> 00:08:38,929 Just let me know if I'm interrupting your... 226 00:08:38,930 --> 00:08:40,709 Just doing some police work. 227 00:08:45,360 --> 00:08:48,119 [LOCK BUZZES] 228 00:08:48,120 --> 00:08:51,259 You know, sometimes I think... 229 00:08:51,260 --> 00:08:53,079 maybe I wanted to get caught. 230 00:08:53,080 --> 00:08:55,919 Then other times, I think... 231 00:08:55,920 --> 00:08:57,708 - no, I didn't. - What is this? 232 00:08:57,709 --> 00:09:00,289 What transaction are we even doing here? 233 00:09:00,290 --> 00:09:02,399 I need your help. Give me the name, 234 00:09:02,400 --> 00:09:04,458 and you won't have to see me anymore. 235 00:09:04,459 --> 00:09:06,541 - What, are you begging? - I'm not gonna beg. 236 00:09:06,542 --> 00:09:08,165 Okay? Are you gonna give me the name or not? 237 00:09:08,166 --> 00:09:10,291 'Cause I don't like a beggar, and if you beg, it's not gonna work. 238 00:09:10,292 --> 00:09:12,374 It's weakness. 239 00:09:12,375 --> 00:09:14,399 But if you were my friend, I don't know. 240 00:09:14,400 --> 00:09:15,519 I do things for my friends. 241 00:09:15,520 --> 00:09:17,208 I like friendship. 242 00:09:17,209 --> 00:09:18,529 So, if you were my friend, maybe I'd help, 243 00:09:18,530 --> 00:09:19,579 but if you're not my friend, I don't know, 244 00:09:19,580 --> 00:09:21,624 but I got to tell you, I'm a pretty good friend to have. 245 00:09:21,625 --> 00:09:23,579 - Ain't that right, Phil? - You're my best friend. 246 00:09:23,580 --> 00:09:24,709 Not best friends. 247 00:09:24,710 --> 00:09:26,416 He said you were his best friend. 248 00:09:26,417 --> 00:09:27,709 He's not my best friend. Phil? 249 00:09:27,710 --> 00:09:29,791 - To me, you are. - To me, you're not, though. 250 00:09:29,792 --> 00:09:31,919 I've told you that. And stop saying that, man. 251 00:09:31,920 --> 00:09:33,589 You make me look like a fucking weirdo. 252 00:09:33,590 --> 00:09:35,084 Understood. 253 00:09:38,120 --> 00:09:39,579 He's definitely not my best friend. 254 00:09:39,580 --> 00:09:42,333 Hey, sounds like you guys need to work this out. 255 00:09:42,334 --> 00:09:44,469 He hangs near my cell a lot, but I can't leave. 256 00:09:44,470 --> 00:09:46,119 - Uh-huh. - So I hear a lot of his stuff, 257 00:09:46,120 --> 00:09:47,299 but I don't give him my stuff. 258 00:09:47,300 --> 00:09:48,499 - All right. - So it's a one-sided friendship. 259 00:09:48,500 --> 00:09:50,249 - Ah. - If I was on the outside... 260 00:09:50,250 --> 00:09:51,989 and I'm not afraid to say this to him, 261 00:09:51,990 --> 00:09:54,208 'cause I have said it to him... he wouldn't be my friend. 262 00:09:54,209 --> 00:09:57,249 But, Phil, would he still be your best friend? 263 00:09:57,250 --> 00:09:58,749 Inside or out, you're my best friend. 264 00:09:58,750 --> 00:10:01,449 So, inside, he's in my group of friends. 265 00:10:01,450 --> 00:10:02,699 - Mm-hmm. - Outside... 266 00:10:02,700 --> 00:10:03,789 A real zero. 267 00:10:03,790 --> 00:10:05,039 I wouldn't want anything to do with him. 268 00:10:05,040 --> 00:10:06,709 - Yeah. Got it. - He's not my kind of guy. 269 00:10:06,710 --> 00:10:07,834 Gotcha. 270 00:10:08,620 --> 00:10:10,499 But friendship's an important thing. 271 00:10:10,500 --> 00:10:11,999 'Cause you can give friendship to somebody, 272 00:10:12,000 --> 00:10:13,059 and they can do whatever they want with it. 273 00:10:13,060 --> 00:10:14,958 And that's what this is about... it's about friendship to me. 274 00:10:14,959 --> 00:10:16,249 Do you mind turning around? 275 00:10:16,250 --> 00:10:18,289 Copy. 276 00:10:18,290 --> 00:10:19,599 I don't want to be friends with him, 277 00:10:19,600 --> 00:10:21,416 - but I want to be friends with you. - Here's the thing. 278 00:10:21,417 --> 00:10:23,791 You're my kind of cop. You got shit done. 279 00:10:23,792 --> 00:10:26,041 - Yeah. - You're the kind of cop that I want 280 00:10:26,042 --> 00:10:27,479 having my back out there. 281 00:10:27,480 --> 00:10:28,699 And right now, 282 00:10:28,700 --> 00:10:30,299 you have an opportunity 283 00:10:30,300 --> 00:10:33,039 - to have my back, okay? - Go ahead. 284 00:10:33,040 --> 00:10:35,539 You give me this name, your life gets better, 285 00:10:35,540 --> 00:10:38,499 my life gets better, our friendship gets stronger. 286 00:10:38,500 --> 00:10:41,041 The kind of friendship we would... become pen pals? 287 00:10:41,042 --> 00:10:42,629 I would love nothing more 288 00:10:42,630 --> 00:10:44,399 than to drop you a note every once in a while. 289 00:10:44,400 --> 00:10:45,840 Hell, I'll keep you updated 290 00:10:45,850 --> 00:10:47,999 on how the case is going. Just so you feel 291 00:10:48,000 --> 00:10:49,009 - a little bit of that juice. - Fuck the case. 292 00:10:49,010 --> 00:10:50,759 - I don't want the case. - Fuck the case, then. 293 00:10:50,760 --> 00:10:52,239 I'll tell you about stuff I'm up to. 294 00:10:52,240 --> 00:10:54,291 - Dates and stuff? - Yeah, sure. 295 00:10:54,292 --> 00:10:56,449 I mean, I'm just getting over a thing right now, 296 00:10:56,450 --> 00:10:58,579 so I'm kind of hibernating. 297 00:10:58,580 --> 00:11:01,379 Tell me the story, but would you mind it in letter form? 298 00:11:01,380 --> 00:11:04,250 - Oh, I'll write it to you. - Like, "Dear... " No, like, do... Yeah. 299 00:11:05,460 --> 00:11:07,160 [SIGHS] 300 00:11:07,170 --> 00:11:08,639 Dear Josh: 301 00:11:08,640 --> 00:11:10,539 Hey, it's me, Dustin. 302 00:11:10,540 --> 00:11:11,666 That's one of my best friends. 303 00:11:11,667 --> 00:11:13,123 I want to just tell you 304 00:11:13,124 --> 00:11:15,979 a quick story, like I mentioned when I saw you in prison, 305 00:11:15,980 --> 00:11:19,329 about the... love that I just lost. 306 00:11:19,330 --> 00:11:21,319 Ah, shit, I've been waiting to hear about this. 307 00:11:21,320 --> 00:11:22,869 I met her on a case, 308 00:11:22,870 --> 00:11:24,139 chasing El Chappie. 309 00:11:24,140 --> 00:11:26,999 I ended up having to infiltrate a... 310 00:11:27,000 --> 00:11:28,920 I'm not gonna lie... the letter's getting boring. 311 00:11:30,870 --> 00:11:33,039 Well, anyhow, man... 312 00:11:33,040 --> 00:11:35,039 - I'm into this, okay? - Great. 313 00:11:35,040 --> 00:11:37,279 And I'm getting close to wanting to help you out, 314 00:11:37,280 --> 00:11:38,292 but here's what I'm afraid of. 315 00:11:38,293 --> 00:11:40,239 - Yeah. - I'm afraid you're telling me 316 00:11:40,240 --> 00:11:42,579 what I want to hear, but you don't mean it. 317 00:11:42,580 --> 00:11:44,629 Doesn't it seem like that? You can turn around, man. 318 00:11:44,630 --> 00:11:46,124 I didn't realize you were still facing the corner. 319 00:11:46,125 --> 00:11:47,166 Thank you, sir. 320 00:11:47,167 --> 00:11:48,666 Doesn't it kind of feel that way, Phil? 321 00:11:48,667 --> 00:11:49,791 It does feel like that. 322 00:11:49,792 --> 00:11:51,509 - Shut the fuck up, Phil. - Here's what I feel like. 323 00:11:51,510 --> 00:11:54,083 Feels like it's prom night and you're my date. 324 00:11:54,084 --> 00:11:55,639 And I'm excited about the date, 325 00:11:55,640 --> 00:11:57,664 and you've given me a lot of promises. 326 00:11:57,665 --> 00:12:00,079 So I got myself ready. I got my nails did. 327 00:12:00,080 --> 00:12:02,399 I got my hair perfect. I got a dress. 328 00:12:02,400 --> 00:12:04,291 I spent money, son. 329 00:12:04,292 --> 00:12:06,416 And, finally, for the first time, 330 00:12:06,417 --> 00:12:08,541 I'm comfortable showing my body. 331 00:12:08,542 --> 00:12:09,919 - [CHUCKLES] - But I'm afraid 332 00:12:09,920 --> 00:12:11,749 you're gonna stand me up. Is that what's gonna happen? 333 00:12:11,750 --> 00:12:13,499 Are you gonna stand me up on prom night? 334 00:12:13,500 --> 00:12:15,119 Let's cut the shit. 335 00:12:15,120 --> 00:12:17,399 We both know, if you help me, 336 00:12:17,400 --> 00:12:20,333 I can snap my fingers, get you transferred out of here 337 00:12:20,334 --> 00:12:23,083 into a nice minimum-security prison. 338 00:12:23,084 --> 00:12:24,644 There's one that has a badminton court. 339 00:12:25,850 --> 00:12:27,739 Hmm... [CHUCKLES SOFTLY] 340 00:12:27,740 --> 00:12:28,791 My answer is no. 341 00:12:28,792 --> 00:12:30,708 [SIGHS] 342 00:12:30,709 --> 00:12:33,292 ♪ 343 00:12:38,667 --> 00:12:42,041 CLINT: Please, please, that's so not necessary. 344 00:12:42,042 --> 00:12:44,909 We have great news, babies. 345 00:12:44,910 --> 00:12:46,919 The data has come back to us 346 00:12:46,920 --> 00:12:49,869 on the first rollout of the BopBots, 347 00:12:49,870 --> 00:12:53,019 and we are very, very encouraged. 348 00:12:53,020 --> 00:12:55,833 Mission accomplished! 349 00:12:55,834 --> 00:12:58,179 Guys, come on. Come on, please. 350 00:12:58,180 --> 00:12:59,249 However... 351 00:12:59,250 --> 00:13:01,449 every up has a down. 352 00:13:01,450 --> 00:13:03,099 And that's just not me talking. 353 00:13:03,100 --> 00:13:04,679 That's Sir Isaac Newton, 354 00:13:04,680 --> 00:13:06,419 regarded by many as the father of physics; 355 00:13:06,420 --> 00:13:10,333 a lifelong virgin and predictor of the 2060 apocalypse. 356 00:13:10,334 --> 00:13:15,039 And yes, the hat was a tribute to him. 357 00:13:15,040 --> 00:13:17,299 I-I wasn't gonna ask about the hat. 358 00:13:17,300 --> 00:13:20,409 - You said there was a down? - Yes, indeed. 359 00:13:20,410 --> 00:13:23,839 With the BopBots being such an unmitigated success, 360 00:13:23,840 --> 00:13:26,124 we will, unfortunately, have to let a few of you go. 361 00:13:26,125 --> 00:13:28,041 - EMPLOYEES: What? - Yeah, but don't worry. 362 00:13:28,042 --> 00:13:29,666 You'll be fairly compensated. 363 00:13:29,667 --> 00:13:30,829 How many is a few? 364 00:13:30,830 --> 00:13:31,919 - Exactly half. - [EMPLOYEES MURMURING] 365 00:13:31,920 --> 00:13:34,499 - Oh, my God! - What did I tell you all? 366 00:13:34,500 --> 00:13:36,079 They're replacing us. 367 00:13:36,080 --> 00:13:40,359 This list has been e-mailed to all of you. 368 00:13:40,360 --> 00:13:43,659 If your name is not on the list, 369 00:13:43,660 --> 00:13:46,139 your contract here has expired. 370 00:13:46,140 --> 00:13:47,189 [EMPLOYEES GROANING] 371 00:13:47,190 --> 00:13:48,699 JANICE: Quick, Fats, am I on the list? 372 00:13:48,700 --> 00:13:50,539 - Am I on the list? Hurry up. - Okay, wait, I'm looking. I'm looking. 373 00:13:50,540 --> 00:13:52,499 - I'm looking. - Look faster. 374 00:13:52,500 --> 00:13:53,999 Yeah, you're on there. 375 00:13:54,000 --> 00:13:55,583 - You're safe. - [SIGHS] 376 00:13:55,584 --> 00:13:57,708 - But I'm fired. - Oh. 377 00:13:57,709 --> 00:13:59,999 - Them's the breaks, kiddo. - I'm fired? 378 00:14:00,000 --> 00:14:01,999 That doesn't make any sense. 379 00:14:02,000 --> 00:14:03,959 I'm the one who welcomed BopBot. 380 00:14:03,960 --> 00:14:06,560 I'm the one in favor of new technology. 381 00:14:06,570 --> 00:14:09,869 Yeah, well, like my mom always told me, 382 00:14:09,870 --> 00:14:11,279 if you're gonna fuck a snake, 383 00:14:11,280 --> 00:14:13,719 don't cry when you get bit on the mouse pouch. 384 00:14:13,720 --> 00:14:14,749 You got bit. 385 00:14:14,750 --> 00:14:16,240 You got bit bad. 386 00:14:16,250 --> 00:14:19,339 CLINT: Apologies, everyone. Reverse that. 387 00:14:19,340 --> 00:14:22,624 If your name is on the list, 388 00:14:22,625 --> 00:14:25,833 your employment here is over. Sorry, guys. 389 00:14:25,834 --> 00:14:28,541 Human error... which is exactly why we need the BopBots. 390 00:14:28,542 --> 00:14:30,369 Are you fucking kidding me? 391 00:14:30,370 --> 00:14:34,479 Please contact your BopBot for a reference, Janice. 392 00:14:34,480 --> 00:14:35,624 Adiós. 393 00:14:35,625 --> 00:14:37,839 I don't know, Chief. We're pretty outnumbered. 394 00:14:37,840 --> 00:14:40,779 - Are you sure you want to go in? - [POWER WINDOW WHIRRING] 395 00:14:40,780 --> 00:14:42,880 Yes? You're saying yes? 396 00:14:44,140 --> 00:14:45,659 Are you sure? It's a suicide mission. 397 00:14:45,660 --> 00:14:48,860 Are you 100% positive? 398 00:14:48,870 --> 00:14:51,100 You're a crazy motherfucker, aren't you? 399 00:14:53,560 --> 00:14:55,414 - Okay. Let's do it. - [SNORING] 400 00:14:55,415 --> 00:14:57,720 Ready to go? On the count of three. 401 00:14:58,720 --> 00:15:00,039 One... 402 00:15:00,040 --> 00:15:03,334 You don't have to nod every time I say something. 403 00:15:03,335 --> 00:15:06,667 Please stop nodding. I'm trying to focus. 404 00:15:08,260 --> 00:15:09,859 [SIGHING]: Fuck me. 405 00:15:09,860 --> 00:15:11,999 What am I doing? 406 00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:14,039 Then you get into the politics of: 407 00:15:14,040 --> 00:15:17,791 what days which group gets to run the TV. 408 00:15:17,792 --> 00:15:20,789 The inner politics... beyond fascinating. 409 00:15:20,790 --> 00:15:22,099 Who decides on what? 410 00:15:22,100 --> 00:15:23,359 Oh, I'm sorry. Are you bored? 411 00:15:23,360 --> 00:15:25,179 - [YAWNING] Yeah, no. - Is this story boring to you? 412 00:15:25,180 --> 00:15:27,160 Then why don't you ask me what I want, 413 00:15:27,170 --> 00:15:28,399 so I can give it to you 414 00:15:28,400 --> 00:15:29,939 so we can move on with our fucking day? 415 00:15:29,940 --> 00:15:31,879 'Cause I don't like this, and you're not doing anything 416 00:15:31,880 --> 00:15:34,119 for the conversation. I got to tell all the stories. 417 00:15:34,120 --> 00:15:35,199 Is there something you want? 418 00:15:35,200 --> 00:15:36,439 Well, isn't that what this is about? 419 00:15:36,440 --> 00:15:37,499 Isn't that the game? 420 00:15:37,500 --> 00:15:38,779 I do this, you do that, 421 00:15:38,780 --> 00:15:40,789 then finally you say, "What is it that you want?" 422 00:15:40,790 --> 00:15:42,919 And I tell you what I want, and then you give it to me 423 00:15:42,920 --> 00:15:44,958 and I give you the name? 'Cause there is something I want. 424 00:15:44,959 --> 00:15:46,499 Great. All right, see? 425 00:15:46,500 --> 00:15:47,739 Now we're talking. 426 00:15:47,740 --> 00:15:49,125 - Yeah. - What do we got? 427 00:15:49,126 --> 00:15:52,079 I miss, uh, the feeling... 428 00:15:52,080 --> 00:15:54,249 of, uh, pine needles under my feet. 429 00:15:54,250 --> 00:15:56,458 - [SIGHS] - I miss the feeling 430 00:15:56,459 --> 00:16:00,699 of rubbing my face against a newborn kitten's whiskers. 431 00:16:00,700 --> 00:16:02,375 Especially when they're just days old. 432 00:16:02,376 --> 00:16:06,059 You know, I also miss the sounds of dogs barking. 433 00:16:06,060 --> 00:16:07,339 Phil, would you mind? 434 00:16:07,340 --> 00:16:09,239 [BARKING] 435 00:16:09,240 --> 00:16:10,659 [CHUCKLES] Thanks. 436 00:16:10,660 --> 00:16:12,167 Now I don't miss that anymore. 437 00:16:12,170 --> 00:16:14,499 Okay. I've listened to you drone on. 438 00:16:14,500 --> 00:16:15,705 Now you're gonna listen to me. 439 00:16:15,706 --> 00:16:17,339 You're up for parole in eight months. 440 00:16:17,340 --> 00:16:19,123 I'm either gonna go to that parole board 441 00:16:19,124 --> 00:16:21,169 and I'm gonna whisper sweet nothings in their ear, 442 00:16:21,170 --> 00:16:24,879 or I'm gonna whisper sour, toxic nothings in their ear, 443 00:16:24,880 --> 00:16:28,084 and you're gonna stay here a lot longer than you think. 444 00:16:28,085 --> 00:16:29,519 [MOCK WHIMPERING] 445 00:16:29,520 --> 00:16:32,579 [LAUGHS] 446 00:16:32,580 --> 00:16:34,659 You trying to scare me into telling you the name 447 00:16:34,660 --> 00:16:36,039 so I can leave jail? 448 00:16:36,040 --> 00:16:37,583 I'm just telling you what's up. 449 00:16:37,584 --> 00:16:39,541 Let me tell you what's up... I fucking love jail. 450 00:16:39,542 --> 00:16:41,332 I could do 20 more years standing on my head, 451 00:16:41,333 --> 00:16:42,639 and not for the reasons you think. 452 00:16:42,640 --> 00:16:45,419 Yes, I've made friends, and yes, the food is pretty good, 453 00:16:45,420 --> 00:16:46,439 but that's not the reason. 454 00:16:46,440 --> 00:16:48,859 The reason is, is 'cause I've learned skills in here. 455 00:16:48,860 --> 00:16:50,139 - Oh, really? - Oh, really. 456 00:16:50,140 --> 00:16:52,079 - Like what? - Like close-up magic. 457 00:16:52,080 --> 00:16:54,549 - Oh, no. - Oh, yeah. 458 00:16:54,550 --> 00:16:55,579 I know magic. 459 00:16:55,580 --> 00:16:58,125 [SIGHS] I don't have time for this. I'll be hon... 460 00:16:58,126 --> 00:17:00,160 Oh. Wow. 461 00:17:00,167 --> 00:17:01,416 Hmm. 462 00:17:01,417 --> 00:17:03,999 - Whew. - Do me a favor. 463 00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:05,039 Pick a card. 464 00:17:05,040 --> 00:17:07,084 Seven of diamonds. 465 00:17:10,050 --> 00:17:12,209 [CHUCKLES] Hey. That was it. Yeah. 466 00:17:13,600 --> 00:17:15,159 But when you consider 467 00:17:15,160 --> 00:17:16,819 how much time you have on your hands, 468 00:17:16,820 --> 00:17:19,167 it's actually not that impressive. 469 00:17:19,170 --> 00:17:20,759 - Pick another one. - Listen to me. 470 00:17:20,760 --> 00:17:22,999 I want that name, and I want that name right now. 471 00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:24,699 It's getting a little tense, isn't it? 472 00:17:24,700 --> 00:17:27,540 - Phil, how about a tune? - [PHIL CLEARS THROAT] 473 00:17:28,540 --> 00:17:32,039 ♪ Ave ♪ 474 00:17:32,040 --> 00:17:36,900 ♪ Maria... ♪ 475 00:17:39,120 --> 00:17:41,579 DISPATCH: Car 34, come in. 476 00:17:41,580 --> 00:17:43,559 Car 34. No activity. 477 00:17:43,560 --> 00:17:46,569 - Uh, any news? - Uh, bad news, I'm afraid. 478 00:17:46,570 --> 00:17:48,999 I really wanted to help, but the case is tied up 479 00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:51,479 with the Las Hormigas Cartel; it's all top secret. 480 00:17:51,480 --> 00:17:53,779 The boss would kill me if I shared any details. 481 00:17:53,780 --> 00:17:55,959 I'm sorry, Cullen. I really wanted to help. 482 00:17:55,960 --> 00:17:57,159 Yeah, copy that. 483 00:17:57,160 --> 00:17:59,139 Anyway, I appreciate you trying to help me out. 484 00:17:59,140 --> 00:18:01,489 Uh, I didn't catch your name, by the way. 485 00:18:01,490 --> 00:18:03,460 You can call me Bob. 486 00:18:03,470 --> 00:18:06,374 Bob? You're not Reynolds's little brother, are you? 487 00:18:06,375 --> 00:18:08,579 You can call me Bob. 488 00:18:08,580 --> 00:18:10,799 Yeah, what's your, what's your last name, though? 489 00:18:10,800 --> 00:18:12,000 You can call me Bob. 490 00:18:16,070 --> 00:18:18,739 Bob, you're not a robot are you? 491 00:18:18,740 --> 00:18:21,219 Ha, ha. That's crazy. I'm Bob. 492 00:18:21,220 --> 00:18:22,417 Can you hear me okay? 493 00:18:22,418 --> 00:18:26,579 Yeah, I can hear you. I'm asking you: Are you a robot? 494 00:18:26,580 --> 00:18:29,541 Ha, ha. That's crazy. I'm Bob. Can you hear me okay? 495 00:18:29,542 --> 00:18:31,909 JANICE: Do you really think these sentient tubes 496 00:18:31,910 --> 00:18:33,999 of bullshit are gonna improve anything? 497 00:18:34,000 --> 00:18:35,124 They already have. 498 00:18:35,125 --> 00:18:36,541 The numbers don't lie. 499 00:18:36,542 --> 00:18:38,208 No, but jerk-offs like you do. 500 00:18:38,209 --> 00:18:41,499 Simon, grab me an extra large vanilla ChapStick. 501 00:18:41,500 --> 00:18:43,499 The more you control the BopBots, 502 00:18:43,500 --> 00:18:46,699 the more programmed it is to fuck us over. 503 00:18:46,700 --> 00:18:47,749 You know what? I'll be pretty annoyed 504 00:18:47,750 --> 00:18:49,559 if I've been talking all night to a robot. 505 00:18:49,560 --> 00:18:51,669 - Are you a robot? - DISPATCH: No way. 506 00:18:51,670 --> 00:18:55,559 Okay, if you're not, just say the words, "I am not a robot." 507 00:18:55,560 --> 00:18:58,619 Ha, ha. That's crazy. I'm Bob. Can you hear me okay? 508 00:18:58,620 --> 00:19:00,119 Yes, I can hear you perfectly. 509 00:19:00,120 --> 00:19:03,019 Now just repeat after me, "I am not a robot." 510 00:19:03,020 --> 00:19:05,029 You and I should get food together sometime. 511 00:19:05,030 --> 00:19:06,549 Do you enjoy pizza? 512 00:19:06,550 --> 00:19:08,499 JANICE: You think you're such a wizard man, 513 00:19:08,500 --> 00:19:11,082 so smart putting all these people out of work. 514 00:19:11,083 --> 00:19:13,819 It's progress, Janice. We got to keep moving forward. 515 00:19:13,820 --> 00:19:15,624 But I know what the endgame is. Hmm? 516 00:19:15,625 --> 00:19:18,319 All it's about is a bunch of guys sitting around 517 00:19:18,320 --> 00:19:19,459 wanting to fuck robots. 518 00:19:19,460 --> 00:19:21,519 And the problem is? 519 00:19:21,520 --> 00:19:23,259 Admit to me that you're a robot. 520 00:19:23,260 --> 00:19:24,699 DISPATCH: You are sounding upset. 521 00:19:24,700 --> 00:19:26,373 Is there anything I can do to help? 522 00:19:26,374 --> 00:19:27,959 Janice, please leave. You're fired. 523 00:19:27,960 --> 00:19:29,374 Let's get security up here. 524 00:19:29,375 --> 00:19:32,166 You can't fire me because I quit. 525 00:19:32,167 --> 00:19:35,249 But everybody just saw you get fired, so nah. 526 00:19:35,250 --> 00:19:37,199 Oh, okay, I'm fired. 527 00:19:37,200 --> 00:19:38,579 - I better take this with me. - No. 528 00:19:38,580 --> 00:19:40,120 - Janice, please. - It's gonna be my new keychain. 529 00:19:40,125 --> 00:19:42,589 - [GRUNTING] - Janice. No, don't. 530 00:19:42,590 --> 00:19:44,629 JANICE: That's you at night. 531 00:19:44,630 --> 00:19:46,124 Please, I beg you. 532 00:19:46,125 --> 00:19:48,249 - Everybody watching? - Janice, no. Don't you dare. 533 00:19:48,250 --> 00:19:49,319 Yeah, I'm fucking upset. 534 00:19:49,320 --> 00:19:50,919 I've been talking to a fucking robot all night. 535 00:19:50,920 --> 00:19:51,999 You're worse than this fucking guy. 536 00:19:52,000 --> 00:19:53,874 You're overreacting, Janice. Just, like, chill out. 537 00:19:53,875 --> 00:19:55,819 CLINT: No, no, no, no, Janice, no! No! 538 00:19:55,820 --> 00:19:59,124 [FEEDBACK, STATIC] 539 00:19:59,125 --> 00:20:01,458 Good morning. 540 00:20:01,459 --> 00:20:03,119 [SIGHS] 541 00:20:03,120 --> 00:20:09,459 [CLINT CRYING] 542 00:20:11,417 --> 00:20:14,124 Oh. I didn't realize I... 543 00:20:14,125 --> 00:20:16,458 Ken, grab me another one, would you? 544 00:20:16,459 --> 00:20:17,999 JANICE: Oh, you motherfucker. 545 00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:19,749 Fuck all of you! 546 00:20:19,750 --> 00:20:21,291 I am out of here! 547 00:20:21,292 --> 00:20:22,369 And, hey, 548 00:20:22,370 --> 00:20:24,739 you all know he fucked a tortoise, right? 549 00:20:24,740 --> 00:20:26,083 You fucked a tortoise. 550 00:20:26,084 --> 00:20:28,699 [LAUGHS] You fucked it. 551 00:20:28,700 --> 00:20:30,279 Wow, what time is it? 552 00:20:30,280 --> 00:20:33,084 Uh, it's about 45 minutes before the end of our shift. 553 00:20:33,085 --> 00:20:34,619 So congratulations, 554 00:20:34,620 --> 00:20:37,333 you've managed to sleep the entire shift. 555 00:20:37,334 --> 00:20:40,300 - Thanks. - You're welcome. 556 00:20:41,160 --> 00:20:42,249 How do you do it, man? 557 00:20:42,250 --> 00:20:44,209 - I bring a pillow. - No, I mean, 558 00:20:44,210 --> 00:20:46,099 how do you not care? 559 00:20:46,100 --> 00:20:48,439 I... And I don't mean that as a judgement, I mean, 560 00:20:48,440 --> 00:20:50,199 I want to know how do you do your job 561 00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:52,166 and just not care so much? 562 00:20:52,167 --> 00:20:55,083 You just catch the fish you need. 563 00:20:55,084 --> 00:20:57,374 What is that supposed to mean? 564 00:20:57,375 --> 00:20:59,099 Well, you're asking me why I'm sleeping, 565 00:20:59,100 --> 00:21:02,329 why I'm not still out there catching the fish. 566 00:21:02,330 --> 00:21:04,699 Oh, okay, is this a fable and in the fable we're fishermen? 567 00:21:04,700 --> 00:21:06,916 It's a parable, and, yeah, we're fishermen. 568 00:21:06,917 --> 00:21:09,279 - Uh-huh. That wasn't clear. - What are the fish to you? 569 00:21:09,280 --> 00:21:10,659 Is it success? 570 00:21:10,660 --> 00:21:12,219 Is it money? 571 00:21:12,220 --> 00:21:14,219 Yeah, I like those fish, sure. 572 00:21:14,220 --> 00:21:16,199 For me, it's just, right now, 573 00:21:16,200 --> 00:21:19,084 - in my... in my brain, they're fish. - Okay. 574 00:21:19,085 --> 00:21:21,259 - So? - But what would I do 575 00:21:21,260 --> 00:21:22,559 with all those fish? 576 00:21:22,560 --> 00:21:25,999 You say, I can sell the fish and make some money 577 00:21:26,000 --> 00:21:28,789 and buy a big boat, and then, you know, 578 00:21:28,790 --> 00:21:31,259 sail out to deeper waters, colder waters, 579 00:21:31,260 --> 00:21:32,914 where, you know, it gets dangerous. 580 00:21:32,915 --> 00:21:34,519 - Mm. - And with all those fish, 581 00:21:34,520 --> 00:21:35,999 you could sell 'em 582 00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:38,041 - for lots and lots of money. - Right. 583 00:21:38,042 --> 00:21:41,999 And then hire a crew, just do all the catching for you. 584 00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:44,416 But then what am I gonna do? 585 00:21:44,417 --> 00:21:46,709 Well, I guess you're a very successful fisherman, 586 00:21:46,710 --> 00:21:50,419 so you would, uh, sit back, relax, 587 00:21:50,420 --> 00:21:53,292 enjoy your... fishing success. 588 00:21:55,770 --> 00:21:57,790 Yeah. 589 00:21:57,810 --> 00:21:58,909 Yeah. 590 00:21:58,910 --> 00:22:00,559 - [SIGHS] - I see. 591 00:22:00,560 --> 00:22:02,949 That's... You're relaxing now. 592 00:22:02,950 --> 00:22:08,125 It's a very... circular... parable. 593 00:22:10,000 --> 00:22:12,429 Come on, man. 594 00:22:12,430 --> 00:22:14,199 Just... try it out. 595 00:22:14,200 --> 00:22:15,639 - Oh, no. - It's the cool side. 596 00:22:15,640 --> 00:22:17,958 - Yeah, that's... - Just a few minutes. 597 00:22:17,959 --> 00:22:19,829 You know you want to. 598 00:22:19,830 --> 00:22:21,374 I don't really want to. 599 00:22:21,375 --> 00:22:23,049 Just try. You... 600 00:22:23,050 --> 00:22:24,625 Just try. 601 00:22:28,250 --> 00:22:30,690 [SIGHS] 602 00:22:39,780 --> 00:22:44,950 [GENTLE MELODY PLAYS] 603 00:22:49,000 --> 00:22:53,919 PHIL: ♪ ... never even knew ya ♪ 604 00:22:53,920 --> 00:22:56,583 ♪ Ah-ah-ah-vay ♪ 605 00:22:56,584 --> 00:22:58,458 ♪ Mari... ♪ 606 00:22:58,459 --> 00:23:00,180 ♪ Ee-ee-ee ♪ 607 00:23:00,209 --> 00:23:02,699 ♪ Ee-ee-ee ♪ 608 00:23:02,700 --> 00:23:05,449 - ♪ Ah. ♪ - Phil, 609 00:23:05,450 --> 00:23:07,369 that... was... gorgeous. 610 00:23:07,370 --> 00:23:09,791 Those are not the words to that song, though. 611 00:23:09,792 --> 00:23:11,499 "Ave Maria, I never really knew ya"? 612 00:23:11,500 --> 00:23:13,208 - I was just going with it. - Well, 613 00:23:13,209 --> 00:23:15,909 this has been fun, but I got to go. 614 00:23:15,910 --> 00:23:17,500 You want to know what I want? 615 00:23:22,667 --> 00:23:26,899 I want you... to contact my wife Tammy. 616 00:23:26,900 --> 00:23:28,291 She's okay with this. 617 00:23:28,292 --> 00:23:30,479 And I want you to go in our sauna. 618 00:23:30,480 --> 00:23:32,539 We have a sauna in our house. 619 00:23:32,540 --> 00:23:34,079 And she knows how hot to make it. 620 00:23:34,080 --> 00:23:35,583 You just follow her rules. 621 00:23:35,584 --> 00:23:38,689 You guys are gonna drink two bottles of Chardonnay. 622 00:23:38,690 --> 00:23:40,291 Then you're gonna have sex. 623 00:23:40,292 --> 00:23:42,749 She's gonna be on top, she's gonna do all the work. 624 00:23:42,750 --> 00:23:45,309 So you're gonna have her smell all over. 625 00:23:45,310 --> 00:23:47,849 Then you're gonna drive straight here, 626 00:23:47,850 --> 00:23:50,205 and I'm gonna smell you from knees to tits, 627 00:23:50,206 --> 00:23:52,439 front and back, for ten straight minutes, 628 00:23:52,440 --> 00:23:53,659 no talking. 629 00:23:53,660 --> 00:23:55,999 Then you're gonna leave, and we're never gonna discuss it, 630 00:23:56,000 --> 00:23:58,199 and we will never make eye contact. 631 00:23:58,200 --> 00:24:01,699 You do that... I give you the name. 632 00:24:01,700 --> 00:24:04,119 I just miss the smell of that woman. 633 00:24:04,120 --> 00:24:06,041 That's the air I breathe, that's my freedom. 634 00:24:06,042 --> 00:24:08,249 - Deal. - [CHUCKLES] 635 00:24:08,250 --> 00:24:11,159 - Great. - Oh, yes! 636 00:24:11,160 --> 00:24:12,916 - [SIGHS] - Or... 637 00:24:12,917 --> 00:24:15,699 I could just arrange for her to come in for a conjugal visit. 638 00:24:15,700 --> 00:24:17,139 They don't... they don't do those anymore. Those are... 639 00:24:17,140 --> 00:24:19,249 That's just an idea from the movies. It's not a real thing. 640 00:24:19,250 --> 00:24:21,659 - Oh, it's a very real thing. - No, it isn't. 641 00:24:21,660 --> 00:24:24,167 - Phil told me they don't exist. - No, they've stopped doing those. 642 00:24:24,170 --> 00:24:27,299 I don't know who gave Phil that information, but he's wrong. 643 00:24:27,300 --> 00:24:29,199 There's a fuck box right behind this prison. 644 00:24:29,200 --> 00:24:31,179 I want to go in the fuck box with Tammy. 645 00:24:31,180 --> 00:24:33,539 Done. 646 00:24:33,540 --> 00:24:36,083 You promise that I can trust you? 647 00:24:36,084 --> 00:24:38,459 I do. 648 00:24:40,560 --> 00:24:44,199 This is me writing down Chief's partner's name, 649 00:24:44,200 --> 00:24:46,499 and if you can get that done, then this is yours. 650 00:24:46,500 --> 00:24:47,749 - We have a deal? - Absolutely. 651 00:24:47,750 --> 00:24:48,959 - Okay, good. - Great. 652 00:24:48,960 --> 00:24:50,279 - Then this is yours. - Great. 653 00:24:50,280 --> 00:24:51,909 Great. Magic. 654 00:24:51,910 --> 00:24:54,249 - [SIGHS] - Phil, do you mind coming over here? 655 00:24:54,250 --> 00:24:57,010 - On my way. - Thanks. 656 00:24:58,830 --> 00:25:01,759 Do you mind putting two fingers into Phil's mouth 657 00:25:01,760 --> 00:25:02,959 and seeing what you find? 658 00:25:02,960 --> 00:25:05,719 Ugh. 659 00:25:05,720 --> 00:25:07,789 Oh. Really? 660 00:25:07,790 --> 00:25:08,999 I insist. 661 00:25:09,000 --> 00:25:11,200 You'll want to. 662 00:25:11,209 --> 00:25:13,209 Oh. 663 00:25:14,600 --> 00:25:15,869 [GROANS] 664 00:25:15,870 --> 00:25:17,167 - Ugh. - Deeper. 665 00:25:18,500 --> 00:25:21,084 No. Don't tell me. No! 666 00:25:22,020 --> 00:25:24,329 "Gary Westbrook." Hmm. 667 00:25:24,330 --> 00:25:25,459 Thank you very much, Haldeman. 668 00:25:25,460 --> 00:25:26,749 - [LAUGHS] - Magic. 669 00:25:26,750 --> 00:25:28,759 - Thank you about the Tammy thing. - It's been a pleasure. 670 00:25:28,760 --> 00:25:30,859 - Very excited to have sex with her. - And thank you, Victor. 671 00:25:30,860 --> 00:25:32,459 - Of course. Yeah. - Great work. 672 00:25:32,460 --> 00:25:33,779 Oh! 673 00:25:33,780 --> 00:25:37,079 Turns out Phil's real name is Victor. [LAUGHS] 674 00:25:37,080 --> 00:25:38,699 See... [GROANS] 675 00:25:38,700 --> 00:25:41,919 ... down at the bureau, they've got this crazy department 676 00:25:41,920 --> 00:25:45,169 that just does focus groups and psychological testing. 677 00:25:45,170 --> 00:25:46,759 You know, in this case, to find out 678 00:25:46,760 --> 00:25:49,084 what names people find trustworthy. 679 00:25:49,085 --> 00:25:52,339 Turns out, Phil is a very trustworthy name. 680 00:25:52,340 --> 00:25:56,019 Victor... not so much. Duplicitous, secretive. 681 00:25:56,020 --> 00:25:57,599 People don't trust Victors. 682 00:25:57,600 --> 00:26:00,460 They do trust Phils. 683 00:26:00,470 --> 00:26:02,705 [LAUGHING]: When you threw my boots, 684 00:26:02,706 --> 00:26:04,519 - oh, my God. - [LAUGHS] Well... 685 00:26:04,520 --> 00:26:06,619 - That was amazing. - That was just off the top of my head. I... 686 00:26:06,620 --> 00:26:08,239 All right, eat shit, asshole. 687 00:26:08,240 --> 00:26:09,839 [BOTH LAUGH] 688 00:26:09,840 --> 00:26:10,979 Oh, man. 689 00:26:10,980 --> 00:26:13,780 It was so good. It was so good. 690 00:26:15,780 --> 00:26:17,419 I'm sorry. 691 00:26:17,420 --> 00:26:18,792 It got real for me, too. 692 00:26:18,793 --> 00:26:22,100 - DUSTIN: Victor! - I'm coming. I'm sorry. 693 00:26:24,700 --> 00:26:27,659 WOMAN [OVER RADIO]: The victim, Gavin "Chief" Reed, Jr., 694 00:26:27,660 --> 00:26:28,899 was a known felon 695 00:26:28,900 --> 00:26:30,519 who was apparently turning witness 696 00:26:30,520 --> 00:26:32,859 against the Las Hormigas Cartel 697 00:26:32,860 --> 00:26:34,939 when he was shot dead by a sniper 698 00:26:34,940 --> 00:26:38,259 in the foyer of the San Diego Police Department. 699 00:26:38,260 --> 00:26:44,834 ♪ 700 00:26:47,720 --> 00:26:49,579 [SIGHS] 701 00:26:49,580 --> 00:26:54,499 ♪ 702 00:26:54,500 --> 00:26:58,079 ♪ I see saints ♪ 703 00:26:58,080 --> 00:27:02,179 ♪ I see angels ♪ 704 00:27:02,180 --> 00:27:05,859 ♪ Reaching out ♪ 705 00:27:05,860 --> 00:27:09,739 ♪ To touch my hand ♪ 706 00:27:09,740 --> 00:27:13,499 ♪ But I will not ♪ 707 00:27:13,500 --> 00:27:18,039 ♪ Be forsaken ♪ 708 00:27:18,040 --> 00:27:21,099 ♪ To live and die ♪ 709 00:27:21,100 --> 00:27:25,699 ♪ In sugarland ♪ 710 00:27:25,700 --> 00:27:28,699 ♪ To live and die ♪ 711 00:27:28,700 --> 00:27:33,539 ♪ In sugarland ♪ 712 00:27:33,540 --> 00:27:36,499 ♪ To live and die ♪ 713 00:27:36,500 --> 00:27:40,539 ♪ In sugarland. ♪ 714 00:27:40,540 --> 00:27:45,440 [VOCALIZING] 51872

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