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1
00:00:02,168 --> 00:00:04,203
Part of him knows
2
00:00:04,205 --> 00:00:05,771
the power's real.
3
00:00:07,540 --> 00:00:09,641
Legion.
All new wednesdays at 10:00.
4
00:00:09,643 --> 00:00:10,943
On fx.
5
00:00:12,846 --> 00:00:16,749
Fxx presents it's always sunny
in Philadelphia.
6
00:00:27,160 --> 00:00:28,193
What's going on with you, man?
7
00:00:28,195 --> 00:00:29,461
Are you limping?
8
00:00:29,463 --> 00:00:31,030
Uh, no, I've just
been working out
9
00:00:31,032 --> 00:00:32,865
on this new exercise bike I got,
10
00:00:32,867 --> 00:00:35,200
and my glutes are, like, so sore.
Yeah.
11
00:00:35,202 --> 00:00:36,402
Know what it is? Oh.
12
00:00:36,404 --> 00:00:38,070
Yeah, big-time, big-time. Howdy.
13
00:00:38,072 --> 00:00:40,806
Hi. It's... it's very
windy today, isn't it?
14
00:00:40,808 --> 00:00:41,807
Yeah.
15
00:00:41,809 --> 00:00:43,876
Oh, man, look at this.
16
00:00:43,878 --> 00:00:45,577
Dog shit.
17
00:00:45,579 --> 00:00:47,646
Did you just step
in that on purpose?
18
00:00:47,648 --> 00:00:50,315
Oh, no, I just... you know,
i didn't really see it.
19
00:00:50,317 --> 00:00:51,517
You pointed it out to me!
20
00:00:51,519 --> 00:00:53,152
And then you stepped
directly in it.
21
00:00:53,154 --> 00:00:54,486
Since when do you read?
What? Nothing.
22
00:00:54,488 --> 00:00:55,721
No.
23
00:00:55,723 --> 00:00:57,256
Books are stupid.
24
00:00:57,258 --> 00:00:58,891
I don't. I was just...
25
00:01:00,060 --> 00:01:01,393
It wasn't... like,
i didn't time it out.
26
00:01:01,395 --> 00:01:03,529
I mean, why would I do that?
I have no idea.
27
00:01:03,531 --> 00:01:05,864
Why are you still standing in it?
It was just an accident, man.
28
00:01:05,866 --> 00:01:07,433
People step in dog shit
accidentally all the time.
29
00:01:07,435 --> 00:01:09,668
Is that a lottery scratcher?
30
00:01:10,603 --> 00:01:11,603
Sometimes it's in,
31
00:01:11,605 --> 00:01:13,539
sometimes it's out.
Are those mirrors?
32
00:01:13,541 --> 00:01:15,107
No. You creep.
33
00:01:22,515 --> 00:01:24,583
Look out, faggot!
34
00:01:37,964 --> 00:01:39,098
Holy shit.
35
00:01:39,100 --> 00:01:40,099
God!
36
00:01:40,101 --> 00:01:41,567
Are you okay?
37
00:01:42,970 --> 00:01:44,937
Hey, frank,
what the hell was that?
38
00:01:44,939 --> 00:01:47,072
What? I saved your life.
39
00:01:47,074 --> 00:01:48,373
But you called me the "f" word.
40
00:01:48,375 --> 00:01:50,275
So what? I'm a hero.
41
00:01:50,277 --> 00:01:51,777
You used a slur, dude.
42
00:01:51,779 --> 00:01:53,312
That's like a hate crime.
43
00:01:53,314 --> 00:01:55,914
You really can't...
Yeah, but he saved his life.
44
00:01:55,916 --> 00:01:57,282
Yeah, but you can't
say that word anymore.
45
00:01:57,284 --> 00:01:58,817
So, which is it?
46
00:02:00,286 --> 00:02:02,354
¶ ¶
47
00:02:22,742 --> 00:02:25,344
you are entitled to nothing!
48
00:02:25,346 --> 00:02:27,012
Listen, motion to present
49
00:02:27,014 --> 00:02:28,413
articles of confederation.
50
00:02:28,415 --> 00:02:30,249
Motion denied. Oh...
Shut up, bitch.
51
00:02:30,251 --> 00:02:31,316
You don't deserve anything.
52
00:02:31,318 --> 00:02:33,418
Excuse me. Hey. Can I help you?
53
00:02:33,420 --> 00:02:35,320
Okay, look, well, usually,
we're a pretty reasonable crew.
54
00:02:35,322 --> 00:02:36,955
Yeah, right? I mean... yeah.
55
00:02:36,957 --> 00:02:38,190
We have our differences,
but we settle them in house.
56
00:02:38,192 --> 00:02:39,525
Sure. We have a good process.
57
00:02:39,527 --> 00:02:40,926
There's filibusters,
the whole thing.
58
00:02:40,928 --> 00:02:42,928
No. This one's a doozy.
59
00:02:42,930 --> 00:02:44,263
Yeah, this one we can't do in-house.
We can't... we can't...
60
00:02:44,265 --> 00:02:46,298
That's why I wanted
to bring in a third party.
61
00:02:46,300 --> 00:02:48,767
Someone to hear us out and
deliver a final verdict.
62
00:02:48,769 --> 00:02:49,768
That's you, guy.
Yeah, that's... you.
63
00:02:49,770 --> 00:02:50,769
That's you.
64
00:02:50,771 --> 00:02:51,837
Because a great injustice
65
00:02:51,839 --> 00:02:53,338
has occurred, okay?
66
00:02:53,340 --> 00:02:54,773
Frank committed a hate crime.
67
00:02:54,775 --> 00:02:56,208
I saved your life.
68
00:02:56,210 --> 00:02:58,377
But you used a slur!
It was a slur.
69
00:02:58,379 --> 00:02:59,945
That's... you'd be
dead if I didn't!
70
00:02:59,947 --> 00:03:01,180
Okay, okay,
i think I'm getting it.
71
00:03:01,182 --> 00:03:03,015
You want me to figure out
whether or not
72
00:03:03,017 --> 00:03:04,183
a hate crime's been committed?
73
00:03:04,185 --> 00:03:05,551
What?
74
00:03:05,553 --> 00:03:06,552
- No.
- No, no, no, no.
75
00:03:06,554 --> 00:03:07,786
Way off. Way off.
No, no, no, no, no.
76
00:03:07,788 --> 00:03:09,821
Oh, no, but, no,
it's not about that at all.
77
00:03:09,823 --> 00:03:11,657
Yeah, it's about this.
78
00:03:11,659 --> 00:03:14,393
A two-dollar scratcher
lottery ticket.
79
00:03:14,395 --> 00:03:15,661
Mm-hmm. Yeah.
80
00:03:15,663 --> 00:03:18,397
Y-you've hired an
arbitration attorney
81
00:03:18,399 --> 00:03:20,299
to figure out which
of you is entitled
82
00:03:20,301 --> 00:03:21,533
to a two-dollar scratcher?
83
00:03:21,535 --> 00:03:22,534
Now you're getting it. Me.
84
00:03:22,536 --> 00:03:24,236
He's getting it. Now he gets it.
85
00:03:24,238 --> 00:03:26,338
The thing is, each one
of us feels that we're entitled
86
00:03:26,340 --> 00:03:27,673
to that ticket, and we need you
87
00:03:27,675 --> 00:03:29,308
to tell us who it belongs to.
Yeah.
88
00:03:29,310 --> 00:03:31,743
Why don't you scratch it
and see if it's worthless,
89
00:03:31,745 --> 00:03:34,313
and then you wouldn't have
to go through all of this?
90
00:03:34,315 --> 00:03:35,380
Okay, so he's not getting it.
What?!
91
00:03:35,382 --> 00:03:36,682
Is he serious?
Do you not want a job?
92
00:03:36,684 --> 00:03:38,584
Hold on. Is it Phil?
Is your name Phil?
93
00:03:38,586 --> 00:03:40,252
Yeah, Phil, yeah. It is Phil?
94
00:03:40,254 --> 00:03:41,353
It's Phil.
95
00:03:41,355 --> 00:03:43,255
This ticket
represents hope, okay?
96
00:03:43,257 --> 00:03:44,890
Potential... yeah?
97
00:03:44,892 --> 00:03:46,258
Promise.
98
00:03:46,260 --> 00:03:49,761
The very foundation upon
which this group rests, eh?
99
00:03:49,763 --> 00:03:50,762
- Yes.
- And that hope
100
00:03:50,764 --> 00:03:52,331
belongs to me.
101
00:03:52,333 --> 00:03:54,099
It belongs to me,
you son of a bitch!
102
00:03:56,437 --> 00:03:58,003
Please, stop.
103
00:03:58,005 --> 00:04:00,906
Each of you will have an
opportunity to plead your case.
104
00:04:00,908 --> 00:04:03,875
The only rule I have is that
you each treat each other
105
00:04:03,877 --> 00:04:07,079
with respect
and common courtesy.
106
00:04:07,081 --> 00:04:09,481
Do we all agree to those terms?
107
00:04:11,451 --> 00:04:13,719
Well, we would like
to thank you so much
108
00:04:13,721 --> 00:04:15,621
for taking our case
so last-minute.
109
00:04:15,623 --> 00:04:17,422
The other guy was not our style.
110
00:04:17,424 --> 00:04:19,691
Well, I'm very happy to do so.
111
00:04:19,693 --> 00:04:22,094
I do have a few questions.
112
00:04:22,096 --> 00:04:23,428
Fire away. Yup. Of course, yeah.
113
00:04:23,430 --> 00:04:27,366
Now, the ticket in question,
uh, who purchased it?
114
00:04:27,368 --> 00:04:28,367
Me! Thank you. Well...
115
00:04:28,369 --> 00:04:31,103
This whole thing is so cut and dry.
It's...
116
00:04:31,105 --> 00:04:32,404
Hold on. I purchased the ticket,
117
00:04:32,406 --> 00:04:35,040
and therefore
the ticket belongs to me.
118
00:04:35,042 --> 00:04:38,477
I actually bought the ticket
a couple of weeks ago.
119
00:04:38,479 --> 00:04:41,246
But I didn't realize it was
gonna be so goddamn blustery
120
00:04:41,248 --> 00:04:43,315
that afternoon.
121
00:04:43,317 --> 00:04:45,717
And as I was putting my book
into my purse,
122
00:04:45,719 --> 00:04:48,353
the ticket flew out
and landed on the ground.
123
00:04:50,456 --> 00:04:52,324
So, you purchased the ticket
two weeks ago.
124
00:04:52,326 --> 00:04:53,425
I did.
125
00:04:53,427 --> 00:04:55,761
And why hadn't you
scratched the ticket yet?
126
00:04:55,763 --> 00:04:58,163
Oh... well, that's because
127
00:04:58,165 --> 00:04:59,831
nobody ever wins
those tickets, right?
128
00:04:59,833 --> 00:05:01,633
But as long as you
don't scratch it,
129
00:05:01,635 --> 00:05:02,968
then you're not a loser.
130
00:05:02,970 --> 00:05:06,104
You know, in fact,
you're a winner.
131
00:05:06,106 --> 00:05:07,506
Potentially.
132
00:05:07,508 --> 00:05:09,508
- God, Dee...
- That is so sad!
133
00:05:09,510 --> 00:05:10,509
It's so pathetic. What are...
134
00:05:10,511 --> 00:05:11,943
It is pathetic. So sad.
135
00:05:11,945 --> 00:05:13,312
What are you talking...
You just said
136
00:05:13,314 --> 00:05:14,913
this exact same thing,
like, ten minutes ago,
137
00:05:14,915 --> 00:05:15,947
talking about how the ticket
138
00:05:15,949 --> 00:05:16,982
represented hope and
all that bullshit.
139
00:05:16,984 --> 00:05:19,785
Somehow coming from you,
it just came off so sad.
140
00:05:19,787 --> 00:05:21,687
Well, hold on a second.
Motion for sub-arbitration
141
00:05:21,689 --> 00:05:23,355
to determine whether
or not that's sad.
142
00:05:23,357 --> 00:05:24,956
Motion accepted. All in favor?
143
00:05:24,958 --> 00:05:25,957
Aye.
144
00:05:25,959 --> 00:05:27,125
Motion passed. It's sad, Dee.
145
00:05:27,127 --> 00:05:28,293
I'd also like to point out
146
00:05:28,295 --> 00:05:30,429
that while Dee's version
is the truth,
147
00:05:30,431 --> 00:05:32,130
it's not the whole truth.
148
00:05:32,132 --> 00:05:35,934
Why don't we talk about
the contents of Dee's purse?
149
00:05:35,936 --> 00:05:38,437
The scratcher ticket,
the candy sour worms,
150
00:05:38,439 --> 00:05:39,504
the pack of cigarettes.
151
00:05:39,506 --> 00:05:42,341
Now, what I want to know is...
152
00:05:42,343 --> 00:05:44,976
How can a woman who makes
less than minimum wage
153
00:05:44,978 --> 00:05:47,479
afford such impulse buys?
154
00:05:47,481 --> 00:05:50,349
So, you're smoking now, Dee?
155
00:05:50,351 --> 00:05:51,883
Is this about your weight?
156
00:05:51,885 --> 00:05:54,219
Because if it is,
you're already too bony.
157
00:05:54,221 --> 00:05:55,887
No, I don't think so.
I mean, I think you're
158
00:05:55,889 --> 00:05:57,022
getting pretty tubby
in the midsection area.
159
00:05:57,024 --> 00:05:58,457
What? Like a bird.
160
00:05:58,459 --> 00:05:59,825
No, no, that's fine.
161
00:05:59,827 --> 00:06:02,561
Her hands are becoming a
major problem for me though.
162
00:06:02,563 --> 00:06:04,396
I have Parkinson's disease.
163
00:06:04,398 --> 00:06:05,697
What?
164
00:06:05,699 --> 00:06:08,567
Well, at least
i have a 46% chance
165
00:06:08,569 --> 00:06:11,403
of getting Parkinson's disease,
according to a DNA test I took.
166
00:06:11,405 --> 00:06:14,139
The medical journal
was because I'm trying to learn
167
00:06:14,141 --> 00:06:16,375
as much as I can
about this, you know?
168
00:06:16,377 --> 00:06:17,576
And, you guys,
according to that,
169
00:06:17,578 --> 00:06:19,411
smoking can reduce
your risk of...
170
00:06:19,413 --> 00:06:21,546
Oh, my god, who gives a shit?!
171
00:06:21,548 --> 00:06:23,348
What? Dee, this isn't
about whether or not
172
00:06:23,350 --> 00:06:25,384
you have some horrific
neurological disease
173
00:06:25,386 --> 00:06:27,219
or whether or not your
hands are the right size.
174
00:06:27,221 --> 00:06:29,388
They are, by the way,
but your elbows are a mess.
175
00:06:29,390 --> 00:06:30,589
They're too sharp.
176
00:06:30,591 --> 00:06:31,523
I don't like it.
They're stabbing me.
177
00:06:31,525 --> 00:06:32,924
That's what it is. You got it.
178
00:06:32,926 --> 00:06:34,593
That's not the point,
that's not the point.
179
00:06:34,595 --> 00:06:38,597
How can you
actually afford to smoke?
180
00:06:38,599 --> 00:06:40,599
You see, Dee and I had a deal.
181
00:06:40,601 --> 00:06:41,767
I give her money for coffee
182
00:06:41,769 --> 00:06:43,435
every morning on
the way to work.
183
00:06:43,437 --> 00:06:46,037
And she's instructed to give
184
00:06:46,039 --> 00:06:47,906
a very generous tip
to the cashier, Cassie.
185
00:06:49,776 --> 00:06:52,511
"This is from my boss, Dennis."
186
00:06:52,513 --> 00:06:55,881
Now, this establishes
both generosity and authority.
187
00:06:55,883 --> 00:06:57,616
Possibly a little dominance.
188
00:06:57,618 --> 00:06:59,184
It's all a very
choreographed dance
189
00:06:59,186 --> 00:07:00,452
between two soon-to-be lovers.
190
00:07:01,621 --> 00:07:02,888
Ah...
191
00:07:02,890 --> 00:07:04,456
Cassie's underage.
192
00:07:04,458 --> 00:07:05,891
No, no, no, what-what?
193
00:07:05,893 --> 00:07:07,392
What are you talking about?
194
00:07:07,394 --> 00:07:08,627
Cassie is not underage.
195
00:07:08,629 --> 00:07:10,529
Cassie is 21 years old.
196
00:07:10,531 --> 00:07:13,198
So, the champagne
i was purchasing
197
00:07:13,200 --> 00:07:15,634
was to celebrate
her legal drinking status.
198
00:07:15,636 --> 00:07:17,235
And to honor her full maturity.
199
00:07:18,639 --> 00:07:20,605
You see, I was waiting
for Cassie to mature.
200
00:07:20,607 --> 00:07:22,307
You know, much like an ira.
201
00:07:22,309 --> 00:07:24,810
Y-you put the money in,
then you wait.
202
00:07:24,812 --> 00:07:27,446
And then you make
a hefty withdrawal.
203
00:07:29,650 --> 00:07:30,782
Okay, yeah, sure.
204
00:07:30,784 --> 00:07:33,452
Before full maturity, yeah, ew.
205
00:07:33,454 --> 00:07:34,719
Yeah, but weren't
you just saying
206
00:07:34,721 --> 00:07:36,888
that you were doing deposits
before maturity?
207
00:07:36,890 --> 00:07:38,723
Uh, no, no, no, no.
See, that's where you're wrong.
208
00:07:38,725 --> 00:07:41,226
No, I was, uh,
between the ages of 18 and 21,
209
00:07:41,228 --> 00:07:42,727
simply making investments.
210
00:07:42,729 --> 00:07:44,296
But not for early deposits?
211
00:07:44,298 --> 00:07:46,131
Well, deposits are
part of the withdrawal.
212
00:07:46,133 --> 00:07:48,600
Sometimes I can't make
a deposit at all.
213
00:07:48,602 --> 00:07:50,135
Ugh, come on, man.
214
00:07:50,137 --> 00:07:51,136
Just...
215
00:07:51,138 --> 00:07:52,471
Okay, just to be clear:
216
00:07:52,473 --> 00:07:53,939
A deposit's a load, right?
217
00:07:53,941 --> 00:07:55,674
Yeah. Well, yeah, yeah.
218
00:07:55,676 --> 00:07:56,675
That's not what
I'm talking about.
219
00:07:56,677 --> 00:07:58,243
No, it's a totally different...
220
00:07:58,245 --> 00:07:59,911
- Are you sure?
- No, with my... no.
221
00:07:59,913 --> 00:08:02,247
Look, not in this particular
case, it's not a lo...
222
00:08:02,249 --> 00:08:03,315
It's-it's...
223
00:08:05,518 --> 00:08:07,018
Yeah, it's a load.
224
00:08:07,020 --> 00:08:08,520
Yeah. I mean, yeah.
But that's not the point!
225
00:08:08,522 --> 00:08:09,754
That's not the point!
The point is:
226
00:08:09,756 --> 00:08:11,857
Dee has no rightful claim
to that ticket,
227
00:08:11,859 --> 00:08:13,358
and I'll prove it.
228
00:08:13,360 --> 00:08:15,126
You see, yesterday,
229
00:08:15,128 --> 00:08:16,862
after noticing
the contents of her purse,
230
00:08:16,864 --> 00:08:19,598
I decided to follow her
this morning.
231
00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:20,832
Cassie never gets her tip,
232
00:08:20,834 --> 00:08:22,501
does she, Dee?
233
00:08:22,503 --> 00:08:24,503
No. Because I refuse
to tip for coffee.
234
00:08:24,505 --> 00:08:26,505
- I think it's dumb.
- Uh-huh.
235
00:08:26,507 --> 00:08:28,039
So if you were buying
circus peanuts
236
00:08:28,041 --> 00:08:29,474
and candy sour worms
and cigarettes,
237
00:08:29,476 --> 00:08:31,142
I think we all know
what that means
238
00:08:31,144 --> 00:08:34,212
about the ticket in
question, don't we?
239
00:08:35,781 --> 00:08:37,616
I don't. Do you know?
240
00:08:37,618 --> 00:08:39,317
No. Totally lost.
241
00:08:39,319 --> 00:08:41,887
That means she bought it
with my money!
242
00:08:41,889 --> 00:08:43,788
So, technically,
that ticket is mine!
243
00:08:43,790 --> 00:08:45,490
Okay, okay, okay.
244
00:08:45,492 --> 00:08:47,959
Now, let me sum up
the facts thus far.
245
00:08:47,961 --> 00:08:50,128
Miss Reynolds bought the ticket
246
00:08:50,130 --> 00:08:51,630
with Mr. Reynolds' money.
247
00:08:51,632 --> 00:08:52,731
But Mr. MacDonald
248
00:08:52,733 --> 00:08:54,132
currently possesses it.
249
00:08:54,134 --> 00:08:57,669
Correct. But I deserve it,
and here's why.
250
00:08:57,671 --> 00:08:59,871
There we were, right?
251
00:08:59,873 --> 00:09:01,573
We were just walking
down the street,
252
00:09:01,575 --> 00:09:02,874
minding our own business.
253
00:09:02,876 --> 00:09:05,544
I'd just spotted
the perfect pile of dog shit,
254
00:09:05,546 --> 00:09:06,578
and naturally I stepped in it.
255
00:09:06,580 --> 00:09:07,712
- What?
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
256
00:09:07,714 --> 00:09:09,381
Okay, I'm a little confused.
257
00:09:09,383 --> 00:09:12,417
Why would you voluntarily
step into the dog feces?
258
00:09:12,419 --> 00:09:14,019
Well, I didn't, really...
You just said you did.
259
00:09:14,021 --> 00:09:16,187
You said naturally you did...
And we all watched you do it.
260
00:09:16,189 --> 00:09:17,556
All right, fine.
261
00:09:17,558 --> 00:09:19,925
I voluntarily
stepped in the dog shit
262
00:09:19,927 --> 00:09:23,995
so that I would smell
of dog shit. Happy?
263
00:09:23,997 --> 00:09:25,564
Less happy. Why would
it make me happy?
264
00:09:25,566 --> 00:09:27,198
I was trying
to cover up the smell
265
00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:28,900
of the skunk that I let spray me
266
00:09:28,902 --> 00:09:30,669
so that there would be
no questions.
267
00:09:30,671 --> 00:09:32,003
Well, now I have more questions.
Of course you do.
268
00:09:32,005 --> 00:09:33,838
Why did you let
a skunk spray you?
269
00:09:33,840 --> 00:09:35,941
To cover the smell of Cologne, man.
Oh, man. You know what?
270
00:09:35,943 --> 00:09:37,842
Go to the beginning.
Go to the first smell!
271
00:09:37,844 --> 00:09:39,611
The first smell that begat
all the other smells!
272
00:09:39,613 --> 00:09:41,713
The first smell was cigarettes!
I've been smoking with Dee!
273
00:09:41,715 --> 00:09:43,014
All right? Fine, I said it.
274
00:09:43,016 --> 00:09:44,616
Oh. Oh, okay. So, right.
275
00:09:44,618 --> 00:09:46,751
So you thought we would care
about the smell of cigarettes,
276
00:09:46,753 --> 00:09:48,620
but not the smell of skunk or dog shit.
Mm. Mm-hmm.
277
00:09:48,622 --> 00:09:49,921
Well, it doesn't matter
anyway, all right,
278
00:09:49,923 --> 00:09:51,556
because I deserve the ticket.
279
00:09:51,558 --> 00:09:53,058
Because if the shit shoe's
a matcher,
280
00:09:53,060 --> 00:09:54,459
Charlie gets the scratcher!
281
00:09:54,461 --> 00:09:55,794
Oh... shit. What the shit?
Come on.
282
00:09:55,796 --> 00:09:57,729
That shirt reeks!
283
00:09:57,731 --> 00:09:58,730
Is that what that smell was?
Yeah.
284
00:09:58,732 --> 00:09:59,731
I thought it was just him.
285
00:09:59,733 --> 00:10:01,633
It does smell;
It smells very bad.
286
00:10:01,635 --> 00:10:03,368
But give me a cigarette;
I'll cover it up.
287
00:10:03,370 --> 00:10:05,270
But, look, if it smells
like shit, you must acquit.
288
00:10:05,272 --> 00:10:07,205
You know what? If everyone's
gonna be smoking on my dime...
289
00:10:07,207 --> 00:10:08,974
Look, nobody is debating
whether or not
290
00:10:08,976 --> 00:10:10,408
the shoe print is yours.
291
00:10:10,410 --> 00:10:11,643
We all know that it is,
292
00:10:11,645 --> 00:10:13,778
because everybody
saw you kick me.
293
00:10:13,780 --> 00:10:15,580
We're debating whether or not
you actually saved my life.
294
00:10:15,582 --> 00:10:17,983
Which you did not, because
i was just about to do
295
00:10:17,985 --> 00:10:19,884
a sweet backflip to safety when you...
Oh, bullshit.
296
00:10:19,886 --> 00:10:21,419
He's never once flipped!
297
00:10:21,421 --> 00:10:22,988
Here we go.
I do flips all the time.
298
00:10:22,990 --> 00:10:24,255
- You have never once flipped.
- In the pool?
299
00:10:24,257 --> 00:10:25,790
Which you would not have done
300
00:10:25,792 --> 00:10:29,094
had I not warned you,
thereby saving your life!
301
00:10:29,096 --> 00:10:30,629
That is my ticket.
302
00:10:30,631 --> 00:10:32,397
Oh...
303
00:10:32,399 --> 00:10:33,798
Ridiculous. "Backflip."
304
00:10:38,971 --> 00:10:41,506
There I was,
minding my own business,
305
00:10:41,508 --> 00:10:43,441
bird watching.
306
00:10:43,443 --> 00:10:44,743
Beautiful day, isn't it?
307
00:10:44,745 --> 00:10:45,777
It's really gorgeous and...
308
00:10:45,779 --> 00:10:47,679
Are those mirrors?
309
00:10:47,681 --> 00:10:49,781
No. You creep.
310
00:10:49,783 --> 00:10:51,249
He wasn't really bird watching,
311
00:10:51,251 --> 00:10:52,784
he was looking
up women's skirts.
312
00:10:52,786 --> 00:10:53,785
He peeps on women.
That's his move.
313
00:10:53,787 --> 00:10:54,819
He's disgusting.
314
00:10:54,821 --> 00:10:56,788
Like I said, bird watching.
315
00:10:56,790 --> 00:10:58,490
Not you.
316
00:10:58,492 --> 00:11:01,993
Now, the point is that I said,
317
00:11:01,995 --> 00:11:03,495
"look out, faggot,"
318
00:11:03,497 --> 00:11:05,463
which were the words
that saved Mac's life.
319
00:11:05,465 --> 00:11:09,134
Thereby, I am entitled to
at least half that ticket.
320
00:11:09,136 --> 00:11:11,503
Well, why did you use the slur
321
00:11:11,505 --> 00:11:13,772
instead of just yelling
your friend's name?
322
00:11:13,774 --> 00:11:15,273
Well, there was a lot going on.
323
00:11:15,275 --> 00:11:17,275
I needed something
that would cut through.
324
00:11:17,277 --> 00:11:19,210
Well, as soon as
i said the slur,
325
00:11:19,212 --> 00:11:22,681
everybody knew to look at Mac.
326
00:11:22,683 --> 00:11:23,882
Look out, faggot!
327
00:11:23,884 --> 00:11:25,050
Mac knew to look.
328
00:11:25,052 --> 00:11:28,119
Dennis and Dee knew to look.
329
00:11:28,121 --> 00:11:30,355
Charlie, who kicked him
in the chest,
330
00:11:30,357 --> 00:11:32,223
knew to look.
331
00:11:32,225 --> 00:11:35,326
Hell, even the little kid
with the balloon
332
00:11:35,328 --> 00:11:36,728
knew where to look.
333
00:11:36,730 --> 00:11:40,365
Okay, it may have
been effective,
334
00:11:40,367 --> 00:11:42,500
but it was an offensive slur.
335
00:11:42,502 --> 00:11:45,670
And a bigot should not be
entitled to a hero's payout.
336
00:11:45,672 --> 00:11:48,506
You're allowed to use
any language you want
337
00:11:48,508 --> 00:11:49,841
to save somebody's life.
338
00:11:49,843 --> 00:11:51,676
Really? Any language? Yes.
339
00:11:51,678 --> 00:11:53,678
You gonna let a man die over a word?
Yeah, yeah.
340
00:11:53,680 --> 00:11:55,380
I mean, come on.
It's just a word.
341
00:11:55,382 --> 00:11:57,682
"Just a word." Oh. Okay.
342
00:11:57,684 --> 00:11:59,250
Well, frank, tell me something:
343
00:11:59,252 --> 00:12:01,252
If you were going to save
somebody else's life,
344
00:12:01,254 --> 00:12:03,888
you know, from a falling piano,
and you needed a word to just...
345
00:12:03,890 --> 00:12:05,824
To just cut right through...
Mm-hmm.
346
00:12:05,826 --> 00:12:09,127
What word would you use
to call out to the arbiter?
347
00:12:13,566 --> 00:12:14,733
Uh...
348
00:12:14,735 --> 00:12:17,202
I suppose...
349
00:12:17,204 --> 00:12:19,370
Yeah, you know what?
We're, uh, we're treading
350
00:12:19,372 --> 00:12:20,739
on some dangerous territory
here, buddy. Yeah.
351
00:12:20,741 --> 00:12:21,840
"Nigger"?
352
00:12:21,842 --> 00:12:23,074
Oh! Whoa, whoa!
353
00:12:23,076 --> 00:12:24,843
What, what? Charlie, you can't
354
00:12:24,845 --> 00:12:27,011
use that word. I'm trying to guess
the word that he was saying
355
00:12:27,013 --> 00:12:28,913
that he thought frank was gonna say.
No, you don't say that ever.
356
00:12:28,915 --> 00:12:29,948
I was not using the word.
357
00:12:29,950 --> 00:12:31,182
Don't ever... that's not...
358
00:12:31,184 --> 00:12:32,217
You can't use that word, buddy.
359
00:12:32,219 --> 00:12:33,885
And yet, we've just sort of been
360
00:12:33,887 --> 00:12:35,720
casually throwing
the f-word around
361
00:12:35,722 --> 00:12:36,888
Willy-nilly for
the past few days,
362
00:12:36,890 --> 00:12:38,556
and that hasn't been a problem?
363
00:12:38,558 --> 00:12:41,626
Well, yeah, Mac, because the...
There's a very dark history
364
00:12:41,628 --> 00:12:43,862
associated with... the n-word.
Yeah.
365
00:12:43,864 --> 00:12:46,564
Did you know that a faggot
is a burning bundle of sticks
366
00:12:46,566 --> 00:12:48,633
on top of which they used
to burn homosexuals?
367
00:12:48,635 --> 00:12:51,302
So, basically, when you
call someone a "faggot,"
368
00:12:51,304 --> 00:12:53,772
you are saying that they
should be burned at the stake.
369
00:12:54,774 --> 00:12:56,975
Is that right?
370
00:12:56,977 --> 00:12:58,777
That's, uh... yes. That's
pretty dark, yeah, that's dark.
371
00:12:58,779 --> 00:13:00,612
- That's pretty dark.
- Yeah, yeah.
372
00:13:00,614 --> 00:13:01,880
Well, maybe there are
a few words
373
00:13:01,882 --> 00:13:02,881
that we shouldn't be
throwing around. Yep.
374
00:13:02,883 --> 00:13:03,948
Yeah. Yeah.
375
00:13:03,950 --> 00:13:04,949
What about "cunt"? Oh!
376
00:13:04,951 --> 00:13:05,917
We can't lose that!
377
00:13:05,919 --> 00:13:07,318
Yeah, it's a good word. What?
378
00:13:07,320 --> 00:13:08,586
That's tough. It's a great word.
379
00:13:08,588 --> 00:13:09,654
And it's just not offensive.
380
00:13:09,656 --> 00:13:11,256
Especially, uh, directed towards
381
00:13:11,258 --> 00:13:13,892
a woman when you're
trying to insult her.
382
00:13:13,894 --> 00:13:15,994
When you're trying to make
a woman feel small.
383
00:13:15,996 --> 00:13:17,996
That's extremely offensive!
384
00:13:17,998 --> 00:13:19,430
Come on, you could
yell "penis" at me,
385
00:13:19,432 --> 00:13:21,232
and I'd be fine with it.
Well, all right, fine.
386
00:13:21,234 --> 00:13:22,801
Well, then, we're gonna take
away your favorite word.
387
00:13:22,803 --> 00:13:24,002
Yeah. Yeah.
388
00:13:24,004 --> 00:13:25,003
What, "cocksucker"? Yeah. Yeah.
389
00:13:25,005 --> 00:13:26,271
What's wrong with that?
390
00:13:26,273 --> 00:13:28,773
You can't say "cocksucker"
if we can't say "cunt."
391
00:13:28,775 --> 00:13:29,974
I find it offensive
that the idea
392
00:13:29,976 --> 00:13:31,810
of sucking cocks is offensive.
393
00:13:31,812 --> 00:13:34,345
Exactly. There's nothing
offensive about sucking cock.
394
00:13:34,347 --> 00:13:35,980
Half the population
loves to suck cock.
395
00:13:35,982 --> 00:13:37,348
The other half
of the population,
396
00:13:37,350 --> 00:13:38,683
they love getting
their cock sucked.
397
00:13:38,685 --> 00:13:39,851
It's kind of a win-win.
398
00:13:39,853 --> 00:13:41,419
We're getting off
the point, okay?
399
00:13:41,421 --> 00:13:45,456
In terms of the ticket,
I'm calling bullshit on frank,
400
00:13:45,458 --> 00:13:47,792
because, for some reason,
he thinks that I'm gay,
401
00:13:47,794 --> 00:13:49,794
and that is why he
called me the f-word,
402
00:13:49,796 --> 00:13:50,995
which makes him a bigot.
403
00:13:50,997 --> 00:13:52,697
Oh, wait.
404
00:13:52,699 --> 00:13:53,965
Uh, catch me up here.
405
00:13:53,967 --> 00:13:55,600
Now, you're not gay?
406
00:13:55,602 --> 00:13:56,868
Obviously not.
407
00:13:56,870 --> 00:13:58,503
Okay. Interesting.
408
00:13:58,505 --> 00:14:01,639
So, Mr. Reynolds, um, simply,
409
00:14:01,641 --> 00:14:03,308
was just trying
to disrespect you.
410
00:14:03,310 --> 00:14:05,210
He wasn't trying
to make a comment
411
00:14:05,212 --> 00:14:07,178
about your sexual orientation?
412
00:14:07,180 --> 00:14:09,447
No, well, see, here's where
things get just a little bit
413
00:14:09,449 --> 00:14:13,318
tricky, because frank thinks
Mac is gay because...
414
00:14:13,320 --> 00:14:14,886
- Mac is gay.
- Yeah.
415
00:14:14,888 --> 00:14:16,888
What?! What-what are
you talking about?
416
00:14:16,890 --> 00:14:18,489
Enough with this.
417
00:14:18,491 --> 00:14:19,858
This is boring. I mean,
he's into the closet,
418
00:14:19,860 --> 00:14:20,892
- he's out of the closet.
- Yeah, yeah.
419
00:14:20,894 --> 00:14:21,993
We don't like you either way.
420
00:14:21,995 --> 00:14:23,862
Oh, look, now, i
care about my body.
421
00:14:23,864 --> 00:14:25,864
So now they become, like, obsessed
with me being gay. Obsessed?
422
00:14:25,866 --> 00:14:27,131
We don't care!
We're the ones who don't care.
423
00:14:27,133 --> 00:14:28,299
Okay. All right, hold on.
424
00:14:28,301 --> 00:14:30,068
Dee, let me just...
Let me put this to bed.
425
00:14:30,070 --> 00:14:32,070
Okay, Mac, we're
in support of it.
426
00:14:32,072 --> 00:14:33,638
So, just come on
out of the closet
427
00:14:33,640 --> 00:14:34,672
and be done with it.
You'll feel better.
428
00:14:34,674 --> 00:14:35,874
- You'll feel better.
- Come on.
429
00:14:35,876 --> 00:14:39,010
I honestly have no idea
what you're talking about.
430
00:14:39,012 --> 00:14:41,346
Mac, Mac...
431
00:14:43,083 --> 00:14:44,349
We found the bike.
432
00:14:44,351 --> 00:14:46,150
Yeah, so?
433
00:14:46,152 --> 00:14:49,087
The bike in the basement?
434
00:14:50,055 --> 00:14:51,990
What about it?
435
00:14:53,859 --> 00:14:56,027
Oh, Mac.
436
00:14:56,029 --> 00:14:57,562
Mac,
437
00:14:57,564 --> 00:14:58,930
don't make me go get the bike.
Oh.
438
00:14:58,932 --> 00:15:00,865
I've got nothing to hide.
439
00:15:00,867 --> 00:15:02,734
Just, uh, go get the bike.
440
00:15:02,736 --> 00:15:04,936
I'm-a go get the bike.
441
00:15:10,009 --> 00:15:13,444
I would like to present
into evidence, uh...
442
00:15:13,446 --> 00:15:14,946
¶ ¶
443
00:15:14,948 --> 00:15:17,682
Mac's bike.
444
00:15:17,684 --> 00:15:20,084
What? It's an awesome
workout bike.
445
00:15:20,086 --> 00:15:21,085
What's the big deal?
446
00:15:21,087 --> 00:15:22,587
Okay.
447
00:15:22,589 --> 00:15:25,290
Mac, why don't you go ahead
and operate the bike.
448
00:15:25,292 --> 00:15:26,557
Yeah.
449
00:15:26,559 --> 00:15:28,092
Sure.
450
00:15:28,094 --> 00:15:30,695
No problem. Just-just like
any other workout bike.
451
00:15:30,697 --> 00:15:31,696
Well...
452
00:15:31,698 --> 00:15:33,164
You pedal...
453
00:15:36,902 --> 00:15:38,803
Uh, there you go.
454
00:15:38,805 --> 00:15:39,804
Outrageous.
455
00:15:39,806 --> 00:15:40,905
Yeah, there it is.
456
00:15:40,907 --> 00:15:43,541
I mean, it's just
the craziest...
457
00:15:43,543 --> 00:15:44,742
All right, all right, all right.
458
00:15:44,744 --> 00:15:45,977
Okay, I...
459
00:15:45,979 --> 00:15:47,412
I know what
you're thinking, okay?
460
00:15:47,414 --> 00:15:49,314
But it is not
what it looks like.
461
00:15:49,316 --> 00:15:50,982
Yeah, what it looks like
462
00:15:50,984 --> 00:15:53,284
is that you are fucking yourself
with a dildo bike.
463
00:15:53,286 --> 00:15:54,285
I mean, you got the bike shorts
464
00:15:54,287 --> 00:15:55,553
with the slits in
them, in the...
465
00:15:55,555 --> 00:15:58,056
Oh, the-the ones in the back?
That's for air flow.
466
00:15:58,058 --> 00:15:59,223
This is grotesque.
467
00:15:59,225 --> 00:16:00,558
No, you're not understanding.
468
00:16:00,560 --> 00:16:02,327
I modded out
a regular workout bike,
469
00:16:02,329 --> 00:16:04,128
to create the optimal workout.
470
00:16:04,130 --> 00:16:06,431
And added a penis. Yeah.
471
00:16:06,433 --> 00:16:08,800
Oh... I see.
472
00:16:08,802 --> 00:16:11,169
I see where you guys
are getting off the rails.
473
00:16:11,171 --> 00:16:12,236
That's not a penis.
474
00:16:12,238 --> 00:16:13,638
Oh.
475
00:16:13,640 --> 00:16:14,973
It's a fist.
476
00:16:14,975 --> 00:16:16,741
Uh...
477
00:16:16,743 --> 00:16:18,743
I call it the ass pounder 4000.
478
00:16:18,745 --> 00:16:20,511
And it works like this.
Uh, no...
479
00:16:20,513 --> 00:16:22,981
Imagine you're riding
up a steep hill,
480
00:16:22,983 --> 00:16:25,750
and you've already been working
super hard,
481
00:16:25,752 --> 00:16:27,618
and you're sweating
and you're tired.
482
00:16:27,620 --> 00:16:29,754
What do you do when
you're tired? You want to rest.
483
00:16:29,756 --> 00:16:30,989
You go to sit down,
484
00:16:30,991 --> 00:16:33,091
it pushes you right back up
in your workout.
485
00:16:33,093 --> 00:16:35,026
The ass pounder 4000
will never let you rest.
486
00:16:35,028 --> 00:16:37,095
- Yeah, see?
- Yeah, yeah, yeah, we got it.
487
00:16:37,097 --> 00:16:38,329
That's the way it works.
We got it.
488
00:16:38,331 --> 00:16:40,999
Now, I even have
an amazing tagline.
489
00:16:41,001 --> 00:16:43,968
"Never stop pumping."
490
00:16:49,875 --> 00:16:51,876
Well, um...
491
00:16:51,878 --> 00:16:53,444
Think we've seen enough.
492
00:16:53,446 --> 00:16:55,013
I've certainly
learned something.
493
00:16:55,015 --> 00:16:58,349
This... this has nothing
to do with being gay.
494
00:16:58,351 --> 00:17:00,018
This is just the work
of a man who's
495
00:17:00,020 --> 00:17:01,386
an extreme sexual deviant.
496
00:17:01,388 --> 00:17:02,887
Gay or not.
497
00:17:02,889 --> 00:17:04,856
- Can I have one of those?
- Yeah, whatever,
498
00:17:04,858 --> 00:17:06,124
yeah, whatever, dude.
Oh, whatever.
499
00:17:06,126 --> 00:17:07,992
You know, you guys are just
jealous because I've got
500
00:17:07,994 --> 00:17:10,194
a million-dollar idea
and I've got the ticket.
501
00:17:10,196 --> 00:17:12,030
You don't have
the ticket yet, bitch!
502
00:17:12,032 --> 00:17:13,231
I bought the ticket.
503
00:17:13,233 --> 00:17:15,199
What are you talking
about?! Are you crazy?!
504
00:17:16,870 --> 00:17:18,703
Quiet! Quiet!
505
00:17:18,705 --> 00:17:20,238
Quiet!
506
00:17:20,240 --> 00:17:22,240
Now, I've heard from
everybody involved,
507
00:17:22,242 --> 00:17:24,509
and I will make my decision.
508
00:17:24,511 --> 00:17:26,277
But let me make one thing clear.
509
00:17:27,713 --> 00:17:30,048
In order for this
to be entirely just,
510
00:17:30,050 --> 00:17:34,886
I will make my decision based
on fairness and compromise.
511
00:17:34,888 --> 00:17:36,054
You understand?
512
00:17:39,324 --> 00:17:42,060
Okay, I think I'm all caught up.
513
00:17:42,062 --> 00:17:44,062
All right, so what's the verdict?
Yeah, what do you got?
514
00:17:44,064 --> 00:17:47,231
I think it's actually
pretty straightforward.
515
00:17:47,233 --> 00:17:49,233
Mr. MacDonald is in possession
of the ticket,
516
00:17:49,235 --> 00:17:50,334
so he has ownership.
517
00:17:50,336 --> 00:17:52,103
However, he would not be
518
00:17:52,105 --> 00:17:55,106
in possession if his life
were not saved by Mr. Reynolds,
519
00:17:55,108 --> 00:17:58,042
who set off the chain
of events saving him.
520
00:17:58,044 --> 00:18:00,878
So I see it as a 50/50 split.
521
00:18:00,880 --> 00:18:02,747
Are you kidding me? I'm a hero!
522
00:18:02,749 --> 00:18:03,948
Oh! You bitch! 50/50 split?
523
00:18:03,950 --> 00:18:05,216
- Out of the way!
- Nothing for the man
524
00:18:05,218 --> 00:18:07,051
who paid for the ticket?
I bought it!
525
00:18:07,053 --> 00:18:09,520
And this bigot here is
gonna get a hero's payout?
526
00:18:09,522 --> 00:18:12,256
He may be a bigot and
he did use disgusting speech,
527
00:18:12,258 --> 00:18:13,691
but it's not technically
528
00:18:13,693 --> 00:18:17,095
hate speech since Mr. MacDonald
does not claim to be gay.
529
00:18:17,097 --> 00:18:19,097
Oh.
530
00:18:19,099 --> 00:18:22,233
Oh, does that mean if I claim
to be gay, I get all of it?
531
00:18:22,235 --> 00:18:24,235
Well, um, y-yes.
532
00:18:24,237 --> 00:18:26,304
You would be entitled
to keep all of it.
533
00:18:26,306 --> 00:18:27,472
I claim to be gay!
534
00:18:27,474 --> 00:18:29,774
No! No, no, no, no.
Now you're gay?
535
00:18:29,776 --> 00:18:31,309
There's a history behind it.
536
00:18:31,311 --> 00:18:34,579
Everybody knows it. Even
the balloon kid knew it.
537
00:18:34,581 --> 00:18:36,647
Soon as he gets that ticket,
he's going back in the closet.
538
00:18:36,649 --> 00:18:37,882
Yeah. This isn't fair.
Mark my words.
539
00:18:37,884 --> 00:18:39,317
If he's gonna do it,
he's got to stay out,
540
00:18:39,319 --> 00:18:40,318
which he won't, I guarantee you.
541
00:18:40,320 --> 00:18:41,919
Fine. Whatever. Yeah. I'm out!
542
00:18:41,921 --> 00:18:43,454
Totally out. I'm gonna...
543
00:18:43,456 --> 00:18:45,289
Hey, uh, excuse me, would
you please do the honors
544
00:18:45,291 --> 00:18:47,391
on my ticket, please?
545
00:18:47,393 --> 00:18:49,794
- It's probably worthless.
- Okay. Sure.
546
00:18:49,796 --> 00:18:52,330
Let's, uh...
Let's see what we have here.
547
00:18:52,332 --> 00:18:53,332
Okay.
548
00:18:55,134 --> 00:18:56,400
Wow.
549
00:18:56,402 --> 00:18:57,468
What?
550
00:18:57,470 --> 00:18:59,504
What is it?
Well, you're a winner.
551
00:18:59,506 --> 00:19:01,572
What? How much?
552
00:19:01,574 --> 00:19:03,674
$10,000.
553
00:19:03,676 --> 00:19:04,775
What?!
554
00:19:04,777 --> 00:19:07,011
No! No! Oh, my god!
555
00:19:07,013 --> 00:19:08,279
Gay Mac rules!
556
00:19:08,281 --> 00:19:10,615
Bullshit! Gay-gay, rich Mac!
557
00:19:10,617 --> 00:19:13,284
All right, if you will just sign
this, releasing the ticket
558
00:19:13,286 --> 00:19:16,254
and agreeing to my ruling.
Don't mind if I do.
559
00:19:16,256 --> 00:19:18,956
I wonder what I'm gonna do
with all this money.
560
00:19:18,958 --> 00:19:20,491
Maybe start an llc.
561
00:19:20,493 --> 00:19:22,160
Ass pounder 4000?
562
00:19:22,162 --> 00:19:24,362
It's all going right
into the product.
563
00:19:24,364 --> 00:19:27,031
Yeah, yeah, sign the paper so
you can go back in the closet.
564
00:19:27,033 --> 00:19:28,166
- Yeah.
- Go ahead.
565
00:19:28,168 --> 00:19:30,168
You go back in. Go ahead. Huh?
566
00:19:30,170 --> 00:19:32,170
Well, you signed the thing.
You got your money.
567
00:19:32,172 --> 00:19:34,172
Just go back in the closet.
Just get it over with.
568
00:19:34,174 --> 00:19:36,974
We know you're gonna do it,
so you might as well just do it.
569
00:19:36,976 --> 00:19:38,776
Yeah. Yeah.
570
00:19:38,778 --> 00:19:43,381
I don't know. Maybe I'll...
Maybe I'll stay out.
571
00:19:43,383 --> 00:19:45,783
Really? Yeah. It doesn't matter.
572
00:19:45,785 --> 00:19:48,186
You can just go back in. You
signed the paper. Y-yeah.
573
00:19:48,188 --> 00:19:49,353
I mean, you got your money.
574
00:19:49,355 --> 00:19:52,223
No, I think I'm out now.
575
00:19:52,225 --> 00:19:55,026
Yeah. I'm... I'm gay.
576
00:19:55,028 --> 00:19:57,662
Actually feels pretty good.
577
00:19:57,664 --> 00:19:59,197
See ya, guys.
578
00:20:05,204 --> 00:20:07,205
Wow. Finally.
579
00:20:07,207 --> 00:20:09,407
Eh, good for him, right?
Yeah, good for him. I'm...
580
00:20:09,409 --> 00:20:11,242
Absolutely.
Guess I'm happy for him.
581
00:20:11,244 --> 00:20:12,877
Yeah, it's a relief, honestly.
582
00:20:12,879 --> 00:20:15,413
All right, if, uh,
you'll just take care of this,
583
00:20:15,415 --> 00:20:17,215
then, uh, we'll be all done.
584
00:20:17,217 --> 00:20:19,417
What's this?
That would be a bill.
585
00:20:19,419 --> 00:20:20,484
Ooh. Oh, money stuff.
586
00:20:20,486 --> 00:20:21,986
Uh... that goes to frank.
587
00:20:21,988 --> 00:20:23,688
I know it's steep,
but you did go through
588
00:20:23,690 --> 00:20:27,325
three arbiters,
and you've been here 17 hours.
589
00:20:27,327 --> 00:20:28,859
Yeah. I'm exhausted.
Yikes, yikes.
590
00:20:28,861 --> 00:20:30,361
What's-what's it add
up to there, frank?
591
00:20:30,363 --> 00:20:32,897
$9,986.
592
00:20:32,899 --> 00:20:35,099
Yikes. Holy cow, you
guys aren't cheap.
593
00:20:35,101 --> 00:20:36,400
You guys aren't cheap.
594
00:20:36,402 --> 00:20:38,669
The arbitration was Mac's idea.
595
00:20:38,671 --> 00:20:41,005
Let's let him pay for it.
That's a great idea.
596
00:20:41,007 --> 00:20:42,773
That's fair. In fairness' sake.
Yeah.
597
00:20:42,775 --> 00:20:45,276
Yeah, he's got the money for it.
He's got the money now. Yeah.
598
00:20:45,278 --> 00:20:47,678
But maybe let's make him
pay it tomorrow, you know?
599
00:20:47,680 --> 00:20:49,714
L-let's let him have this.
Yeah. Yeah.
600
00:20:49,716 --> 00:20:53,351
Poor guy did just come out
over a $14 scratcher.
601
00:20:53,353 --> 00:20:54,619
That's all that's left? Yeah.
602
00:20:54,621 --> 00:20:56,454
Oh, no. That sucks.
603
00:20:56,456 --> 00:20:57,888
Oh, no.
604
00:20:57,890 --> 00:20:59,257
Tell you what, man,
i am happy for him,
605
00:20:59,259 --> 00:21:01,525
but I do still hate him.
Oh, yeah.
606
00:21:01,527 --> 00:21:04,028
It's not a gay or straight thing, is it?
No, no, no, no, no.
607
00:21:04,030 --> 00:21:05,096
It's a Mac thing.
608
00:21:46,938 --> 00:21:49,006
Captioned by
media access group at wgbh
609
00:21:51,610 --> 00:21:53,944
look, as we all know, everything
is about emotion with women.
610
00:21:53,946 --> 00:21:55,012
Right, Dee? What?
611
00:21:55,014 --> 00:21:56,781
Oh, my god! Whoa! Whoa.
612
00:21:56,783 --> 00:21:58,115
All right, Dee. Relax.
613
00:21:58,117 --> 00:22:00,184
We're trying to have
a rational conversation.
614
00:22:00,986 --> 00:22:02,653
Sunny. All new.
615
00:22:02,655 --> 00:22:05,723
Wednesdays at 10:00.
Only on fxx.
616
00:22:09,628 --> 00:22:13,698
I am a very dangerous man
617
00:22:13,700 --> 00:22:15,066
to know.
618
00:22:17,869 --> 00:22:22,006
Taboo.
All new Tuesdays at 10:00 on fx.
619
00:22:26,611 --> 00:22:29,013
Man seeking woman.
620
00:22:29,015 --> 00:22:31,182
All new, wednesdays at 10:30.
621
00:22:31,184 --> 00:22:32,850
Only on fxx.
622
00:22:34,820 --> 00:22:36,854
Careful, honey.
623
00:22:36,856 --> 00:22:38,456
Oh.
624
00:22:40,492 --> 00:22:42,360
Mmm. What's this?
625
00:22:42,362 --> 00:22:44,061
It's still good.
626
00:22:44,063 --> 00:22:45,863
Baskets.
627
00:22:45,865 --> 00:22:48,899
All new Thursdays at 10:00.
On fx.
628
00:22:52,738 --> 00:22:54,538
So, is he crazy?
629
00:22:54,540 --> 00:22:57,541
I think he believes
he's mentally ill.
630
00:22:57,543 --> 00:23:00,478
But at the same time,
part of him knows...
631
00:23:02,714 --> 00:23:04,115
The power's real.
632
00:23:05,717 --> 00:23:07,251
Legion.
633
00:23:07,253 --> 00:23:09,954
All new wednesdays at 10:00
on fx.
634
00:23:12,190 --> 00:23:14,759
Take an hour of his time.
635
00:23:14,761 --> 00:23:17,361
Wow. Look at Stan's yard.
636
00:23:17,363 --> 00:23:19,497
Someone's been busy.
637
00:23:19,499 --> 00:23:22,600
Clearly not in ours. Maybe
Henry can do some work today.
638
00:23:22,602 --> 00:23:24,702
Yeah.
639
00:23:24,704 --> 00:23:27,204
I forget your back is always
bad this time of year.
640
00:23:27,206 --> 00:23:28,839
Only when there are leaves...
641
00:23:33,044 --> 00:23:35,079
When did you wash this last?
46699
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