Original subtitles

Subtitles by explosiveskull www.elsubtitle.com

Cooper!

Who paints a room pink?

Wait, wait...

Don't look at me like that.

You're the one that's gonna have to shit that out later.

Oh.

Piece of cake.

Jesus Christ!

Doorbell needs fixing.

Bourbon?

What brings you out to the suburbs?

Change of scenery.

Uh, my wife and I got a baby on the way,

and this guy needed a yard.

Thought a little bit of elbow room

would do everybody some good.

Family's good.

Dirt's good.

Kids can't grow up right without some mud on their jeans

and a frog in their pocket.

What about you? Do you live around here?

Since '84,

long enough to see my fair share of things

come and go.

So you're a nun...?

Good Lord.

I remember Chicago being more progressive than that.

No, we're Protestant.

I'm the pastor.

I apologize. I should've known.

My wife and I aren't very religious.

- I just didn't... - Don't sweat it, slick.

We're more laidback out here.

And my door is always open,

if you care to learn more.

Hey, Bunny!

Hi, Tiger. How was your first night?

Oh, great. Look at this place.

Did you just wake up?

Hey, how's the little kicker doing?

Say hi to Daddy.

Hey, little Pumpkin Head.

Oh my God, you're not calling your daughter

"Pumpkin Head." Please.

Oh, come on, babe.

You've seen the size of your belly.

That's the only explanation.

So, what's on the agenda today?

How's the schedule looking?

Oh, the schedule feels great.

I will finish this room

as soon as I'm off the phone with you

and I'll move on to the kitchen in the afternoon.

So what, like painting, sanding,

opening that giant gaping hole?

Ugh, are you sure you don't want me

to call in some pros, Don?

This is a lot of work.

No, we're not calling anybody.

I got this.

How could I sleep at night

knowing some other jerkwad built your castle?

Well, you'd sleep because the roof wouldn't leak.

What's that?

Oh, there's piles of junk all over this place.

Please don't be paranoid.

I trust you.

Shit, I got to go.

I've got, um, team's proposals at ten.

Anyway, I'll call you tonight, okay?

Love you.

Mwah.

Mwah.

Bye.

"So once you get your drywall size,

you want to just check by hand

and see where does the drywall give in?

Now, luckily, it's only a small section..."

♪ So lost in darkness

♪ In and out of selfishness

♪ Hoarding all my dreams

♪ Was just no way to be

♪ Then you gifted me such a precious thing

♪ A chance to be someone who deserved love

♪ When I heard

♪ A single tear

- Close enough.

♪ It showed me what

♪ A single tear

♪ Real strength could be

♪ A single tear

♪ As a single teardrop fell ♪

What the hell?

Oh, piece of shit drill, motherfucker!

Ow!

Oh, God!

How's it going, Mr. Koch?

Change of pace, huh?

Something like that.

How's a guy like you planning to survive out here?

I'll figure it out.

Can't imagine there's much of a nightlife.

No fancy supper clubs.

No strippers to woo clients with.

Uh, there's plenty of strippers.

I just don't have any clients left to woo.

True.

Which begs the question,

how exactly can you afford this place?

Good old Liz.

Yeah. I like her.

Smart woman.

How's she accepting this change?

She will keep her company running

and she'll commute once the baby's born.

You know, it's not like our life's over.

It's just...

...it's maturing.

It'd better be, Don.

Feds cut you one hell of a sweetheart deal,

all things considered.

Be a shame if you fucked it all up again.

That it?

Yeah.

That's the last of it.

That's a beautiful church.

Oh, shit!

You gonna be okay?

Don't shit in the house.

Goddamn machine likes to eat balls.

You hungry or thirsty?

Both.

Cocktails I have some control over.

Food can be hit or miss.

Well let's start with a drink, then.

Smart man.

It's not bad.

I'll quote you in the next ad.

So, uh, are you visiting or lost?

Resident.

I, uh, just bought the house on Saul and Circle.

What?

You queer?

Excuse me?

It's a simple question.

Yeah, I'm about to have a kid.

What kind of a question is that?

Easy, Don.

Gay people can have kids, too.

Nothing wrong with that.

I know that. I...

I'm happily married.

Of course, you are.

I'm sorry.

That house just seems to be bad news for straight men.

Uh, but, uh, I'm sure you'll be fine.

How about a shot?

You've got a real fucked up way of welcoming people

to the neighborhood, Geary.

Cooper!

Cooper!

Cooper?

Shit!

You really suck, you know that?

You know, Cleo and Jason

brought up the Hyde Park Project again.

So frustrating

to keep having to telling them no.

You know what I also hate?

Having to pee all the time.

God, if these things get any more swollen

I won't be able to stand up straight.

So, how is it going over there?

Great. I got a ton done today.

I'm feeling positive about it.

That's wonderful, babe.

How's the kitchen shaping up?

Well, I actually didn't make it

into the kitchen today,

but it is the first thing on tomorrow's list.

Are you sure you don't need some

extra hands, babe?

I'm sure, Bunny.

Everything's going fine.

Don't forget Milo's coming up this weekend.

But if you wanna help,

you can do me a favor right now.

What's that?

Just tilt that phone down to those

beautiful boobs one more time.

That's all you get until I see a finished kitchen.

All right. Good night.

Mwah!

Hi, Daddy.

I've been such a naughty, naughty girl.

You always know exactly how to treat me.

Oh, I'll do whatever you say, Daddy.

Are you gonna punish me?

Hi, Daddy.

I've been such a naughty, naughty girl.

Hey, hey, out!

That looks terrific.

Old pipes.

They don't look so old.

Can I help you with something?

I just like it here.

- What? - The house.

It's usually empty.

Oh, well, I bought it.

So it's not empty anymore.

Hmm, shame.

Uh, I'd better get back inside.

Sure. No problem.

See you around.

♪ Distill

♪ Distill

♪ Break them all down

♪ Distill

♪ Distill

♪ Tear them all apart

♪ Distill ♪

Fuck!

Oh, Christ.

Still smoke, Dad?

And in here, we will change this wallpaper

to something a lot less hideous.

Who's "we?"

My wife and I.

Are you sure? It's very retro.

You might end up regretting it.

Uh, well, I'll let you know if we lose any sleep over it.

A man who never second-guesses himself, huh?

What's this?

Now, this...

This is retro.

A tiny closet?

Please tell me you guys are keeping this.

Entire reason I bought the house.

You have great taste.

What's in here?

- White? - Oh, you got me.

The wife picked it out.

I think it was called "French Vanilla"

or something like that.

It's supposed to be next year's trendy color.

Hmm.

Anything else you wanna show me?

Can you do me a favor?

What's that?

Choke me.

Hmm.

This dress looked better on the floor.

That was even better than I hoped for.

Oh, don't look at me like that.

I earned that.

That is insane!

I know. Well, check this out.

What the hell is that?

I don't know. Bleachers?

Hey, maybe they heard about how hot our sex life is

and had them installed, huh?

Oh, my God.

I just don't understand how you missed this

during the appraisal.

You were here too, and these weren't.

I'm gonna call the real estate agent.

Why?

What is she going to do? They're here.

Because I want them gone.

The ceiling repair is gonna cost time and money

- and we should be compensated. - Bunny...

Bunny, relax, okay? This is an easy fix.

It's probably just a shoddy patch, all right?

No structural damage.

Me and Milo can tackle this, no problem.

Trust me, okay?

I trust you, babe.

I just don't want you to bite off

more than you can chew.

Eh, I should have got a dumpster.

What you doing?

You know me,

I'm just working hard, cranking away.

Sounds fun.

Want some help?

Nah.

Doing a bunch of heavy lifting in here.

I got this.

Okay.

Look, last night was super-hot,

but we shouldn't.

You know, I got to get this place tip-top

before the wife and baby get here,

and there's still, like,

a laundry list of things to do.

True, but that's later.

What about right now?

I can't. I'm sure you understand.

Sure.

I understand.

Hey, Tiger.

- Jesus... - Shh.

What the fuck?

It's Saturday, idiot.

Nice doorbell.

Well, that's certainly creepy.

You don't know the half of it.

Did you freaks pay extra for that feature or...

Shut up, dick.

We didn't know this was there.

Well, I don't know, man.

Turn the attic into a guest room.

Airbnb it, charge a fortune to watch.

This is gone by the weekend

or there's not gonna be a wife left to watch.

Well, for the sake of your kid,

we better get to work.

Where are your tools?

Right there.

That's it?

You plan on renovating an entire house

with a Swiss army knife?

What? Is that not enough?

No.

Lift.

- You good? - Yeah.

All right. Here we go.

How's the firm anyway?

Shit.

New regulations got us by the balls.

You got out at the right time.

Maybe not gracefully, but, you know?

You still making money, at least?

Not as much.

Have to work twice as hard for it.

Need to find a Liz for myself.

It's a bad idea if you, uh,

are afraid of hard work.

Motherfucker, you don't see me holding the other side

of this heavy-ass drywall above my head?

Free of charge, I might add?

Hey, listen, all the money I've made you,

couple hours of gratis isn't too much to ask.

Well, you do have a pretty nice house.

What's next? Applebee's?

Is that the wife?

You mean this modest motherfucker didn't tell you?

He basically ran Chicago.

King Don, we called him.

I had a good run.

Whoa.

You traded a penthouse for a whorehouse?

That might officially make you the craziest man in town.

Wait, what?

Oh, he didn't tell you?

King Don is the proud owner

of Portsmith's former house of ill repute.

That was over a hundred years ago.

Well, might explain some things, though.

Speaking of pleasure,

a little light on options in here, isn't it?

You move to the suburbs to start a family,

or because everyone thinks you're an asshole.

Right. Because you're an asshole.

Certainly there's a college around here, right?

Like, I saw one or two cute girls walking around earlier.

No college.

But, uh, Gwen Martin will be in later.

Oh?

Who's Gwen Martin?

She runs an erotic pottery class.

She's a feminist, though.

That's great.

I'm a feminist.

Me too, son.

Promise me you won't say a word to Liz

about last night.

I swore to her I wouldn't drink.

Bro code, bro!

Good man.

My head's killing me. I need coffee.

You want some?

Your assistant already brewed a pot.

Morning, Don.

What the hell are you doing here?

I stopped by.

Milo let me in. What's wrong?

"What's wrong?" Are you kidding me?

All right. Let's get something straight.

This is my life...

Sarah. My name is Sarah.

Great, Sarah.

Look, I'm not fucking around right now.

It was a fun night, don't get me wrong,

but I don't ever wanna see you here in my house ever again.

You understand me?

Sure, man.

Don't make it weird.

All good in here?

What the fuck was that?

Nothing. Nothing.

Don't worry about it.

Come on, don't bullshit me, Don.

What did you do?

I didn't do anything, okay?

You're overreacting.

You're standing there threatening a woman

and I'm overreacting?

All right.

Look, between you and me, I fucked up, all right?

I didn't go looking for it.

I didn't ask for it, I didn't even really want it.

It just happened, she came back.

I explained to her it was a mistake.

It's not gonna be a problem.

Can we just go to the hardware store for...

How many times are you gonna fuck up

until you get a clue?

Liz is pregnant. That's your blood.

And you're out here trying to recapture your glory days

while she's busting ass to keep a roof over your head?

She's my friend, dude.

What... How am I supposed to look her in the eye now?

Liz doesn't need to find out, okay?

Everything's gonna be fine.

When are you gonna start thinking about someone

other than yourself?

Oh, fuck, it is what it is, Milo, okay?

If you can't handle it,

don't be here when I come back!

Cooper!

Of course not.

You like my trick?

Sarah, are you crazy? I almost fucked you up.

I'm just playing.

Look, I'm sorry Don's such an asshole

but you need to get out of here.

Well, that's no fun.

You wanna help me or what?

Milo?

All right, dick, you can come out now.

Oh, it's been a killer weekend, Bun.

We got a ton done.

Did Milo have fun

or did you just work him to death?

He wanted to work the whole time.

Check this out.

Wow.

I'm seriously impressed, Tiger.

I told you not to worry.

Wait, what was that?

What?

I just saw something behind you.

What are you talking about?

Don, don't mess with me, is Milo still there?

No.

He had to head back to work.

Are you sure?

I don't know.

I thought I saw someone. Now I'm getting freaked out.

Well, you're not the one who has to

sleep here tonight, Bunny.

Check all this out.

Wow, it looks great, babe.

Babe, if somebody else was in here,

Cooper would be all crazy right now.

Good point.

You want I should sleep with a hammer

under my pillow tonight, just in case?

You probably better.

I don't want to have to kill someone when I get there.

Are you okay?

Yeah.

Yeah. I'm just getting tired, babe.

Well, rest up, okay, babe?

I'll call you tomorrow.

What the fuck?

Ah!

How's it going, Don?

You wanna talk about it?

Nothing to talk about.

Let's start with the house.

How is she coming along?

Just fine.

Fine, huh?

You know, when a woman gets to be a certain age,

she doesn't like to be futzed with too much.

Houses aren't that different, I guess.

It's...

It's been hard.

I bet.

This house is a bitch.

What's that mean?

Well, just that certain places have personalities,

and sometimes they're rotten.

It takes a real strong hand to turn them around again.

I'm trying.

"Blessed is the man who remains

steadfast under trial."

Hi, handsome.

Coop?

Cooper?

- Sarah? - Sarah, yeah.

No last name?

I imagine she has one

but I didn't check her ID, okay?

She lives in the neighborhood,

she won't stop fucking with me!

Look.

And?

And?!

You see the dog, right?

You think he jumped into the goddamn dryer

by himself?

Did he turn it on, too?

Come on, man. It was her.

Milo!

Call me back.

Look, I'll put the name and the description

in my report.

But there's no signs of forced entry,

no evidence of a struggle,

and you were sleeping upstairs the whole time

and didn't hear a thing.

Oh, great.

Well, thank you for your service.

Is this your idea of law enforcement?

You just poke your head and you shrug your shoulders

like a dipshit.

You didn't do anything.

Please let us know if anything else comes up...

King Don.

I hate what you've done with the place.

I'm sorry.

For what?

I'm sorry for not being honest from the start.

I'm sorry for treating you unfairly.

I'm sorry for making you feel unimportant.

And most of all, I'm sorry for threatening you.

Wow.

Did you rehearse that?

I deserved that, but no.

I mean it, I'm sorry.

I understand why you feel so angry.

Well, it's not a very nice way

to treat someone, Don.

I hope you treat your wife and kid better than this.

I love my wife.

And I wish I was stronger.

To make all this up to you, I got you something.

A gift from a married man.

Sounds a lot like a bribe.

If you're interested, it's in the kitchen.

I appreciate the apology, Don.

I don't want things to get any uglier.

Hey, Bunny.

Hey, Tiger? What you doin'?

Oh.

Just working.

So, I got a text from Milo.

Oh, yeah?

It was kind of weird. He said we needed to talk.

Any idea why?

No, I have no clue, babe.

Don, just be honest with me.

Look, is the renovation in trouble?

Is that what it is?

Did he see some things that he thinks

I should know about?

No!

Tiger, calm down.

Everything is fine, Liz! All right?

You're gonna throw this in my face now?!

I have no idea why Milo called you,

but please, by all means, call him, find out.

I'm busy. I... I wanna get back to work.

Shit!

Sarah!

What the fuck!

Oh God!

"You've reached the voicemail of Officer Henry Baker

of the Portsmith Police Department.

Please state your name, number, and detailed message

at the sound of the tone.

Please stop!

Why?

Why are you doing this to me?

Stay away from me!

Hello?

Tiger?

Cooper, come here, boy.

Hello?

Cooper, come here.

Absolutely not.

Oh, Jesus, Don, no dropcloth?

Oh, Jesus, Don, what did you spill here?

What are you doing, Don?

Oh my God.

Come on, Donald.

What are you up to?

Jesus!

I'm so, so, so sorry.

Uh, I'm sorry, can I help you?

I didn't mean to frighten you.

My name is Sarah.

I've been helping Don.

Uh, hel... helping Don?

I'm sorry, what does, what does that mean exactly?

You know, getting the house ready for you.

Because you're a carpenter?

No, ma'am. More like a gofer.

"Drywall screws, boss? Sure thing!"

I'm an architecture nut. Don couldn't say no.

No. That definitely isn't his strong suit.

How long?

I'm sorry?

Your baby?

How long till she's due?

Uh, twelve weeks.

If she's anything like me, she'll be on time.

If she's like her father, much later.

May I?

Oh, I don't think so.

Someone's here.

Missus Koch?

Yes?

I'm Ellie Mueller.

Can we talk?

Let me guess, you're the plumber?

Uh, no, darling, I work across the street.

But I do deal with a lot of people's shit.

That's right, Don did mention you, sorry.

Would, would you like to come in?

Why don't we chat outside instead?

Okay. Sure, just, uh, give me a sec, okay?

Hey, sorry to be rude but, um...

Hello?

So how's Don doing?

He looks tired, but he's a workhorse.

Where... where is he now?

I'm not really sure.

He must have just taken the dog for a run.

I, I should have called first, but I wanted to surprise him.

Would you say it's a good marriage?

I'm sorry?

Ah.

This house has a history

of bringing out the worst in people.

I just wanted make sure you two are prepared for that.

Right.

Well, it, it clearly needs a lot of work,

but it's... it's not that bad.

I'm sure we'll manage.

You never really know until you start

tearing a place up, though.

Uh-hmm.

Well, thank you for your concern, really, uh,

but Don and I have been through much worse,

so we'll be fine.

I am not creeped out by this house one bit.

I am in complete control of my emotions.

Just like Beyonce.

Oh, Christ.

Fuck this.

Hi.

I'm worried.

My husband is a fuck-up.

Well, you're not the first woman to say that

about her husband.

No.

I don't mean he, uh, leaves the toilet seat up.

He, um...

he defrauded his clients

out of their retirement funds.

He barely avoided fifteen years in a federal prison.

He cheated on me

while I was trying to get pregnant,

and then he insists that buying this house

was our second chance, so, yeah.

So why'd you stay?

The alternatives seemed worse.

Life is a series of choices.

Cause and effect.

Sounds like Don hasn't learned that dynamic yet.

I'm just scared.

Oh, I'm scared he's drinking again.

He's probably drunk right now.

I think this house just pushed him right over the edge.

This house has a habit of testing men.

I've met families who have lived there

happily for years and others

who never make it a home.

The difference seems to come down to the character

and determination of the people moving in.

Well, we're screwed, then.

So what's the plan?

I don't know. Wait for him to come home,

sober up.

And then have a long, honest talk about our future.

You're a brave woman, Liz.

You want my advice?

Get your husband and your baby

far away from that house.

Uh, excuse me?

Don?

Don?

Jesus.

Welcome home.

What the fuck is going on here?

A party.

Where is my husband?

Upstairs, I think.

Cocktail?

Fuck off.

Don?

Don!

Don!

Joining?

No.

Don?

The show's already started.

Go upstairs.

Don?!

Don!

Oh.

Stop!

Stop!

Is the show over already?

That's my girl.

The male performers wore costumes

because the owner felt the mix of erotic

and grotesque heightened the experience.

He was right.

We were popular, and the money flowed in.

Some nights, we'd work until dawn.

It was too busy to keep an eye on everyone.

Even the innocent ones.

Even the not-so-innocent.

He played with her for months and then killed her,

dumping her body at the train tracks,

and the world moved on.

Well, some of the world did.

When he killed me, my body never left the house.

I was a star,

loved by the men who came through our doors,

but not one of them questioned my disappearance.

All men really love is the power you give them.

Don.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

I'm so sorry.

I couldn't get them all.

Don, baby?

What happened to you? What happened?

Hey, look, look.

I don't know what the fuck is going on in this house,

but we got to get out of here right now.

It's not that easy.

What does that mean?

Bunny, I fucked up again.

What does that mean, Don?

I just... I felt so small.

I just wanted to be the man one more time.

You understand that don't you, Bunny?

No!

I don't!

Bunny!

I promise I can change.

I promise it'll be different. Bunny, look at me.

Bunny, you just have to say that you understand

and that it's okay.

Please.

It's not okay!

I can change, Liz!

I'm proud of you, Liz!

Thought you weren't gonna make it there at the end.

Hey, Liz.

Liz!

Nope!

You did good.

I'd offer you some,

but it isn't the seventies anymore.

You knew?

Yeah,

I watch this house and it watches mine.

Why the fuck didn't you warn us?

Life is a series of choices, Liz.

You can't talk someone into doing the right thing

or the wrong thing.

I couldn't keep someone out of this house

any more than those girls inside

could keep someone out of mine.

Need to lay the options out and see what they choose.

A test.

Exactly.

Well, it seems like a pretty shitty game.

It is, kiddo.

But I didn't make the rules.

Hello, my little angel.

You don't wanna sleep at all, do you?

After your nap, we're gonna go to the park.

Would you like that, huh?

I love you so much.

That's my girl.

♪ Ought to know what a liar I am

♪ Ought to know me by now

Subtitles by explosiveskull www.elsubtitle.com

♪ Don't curse me for my nature

♪ Don't bless me for my wrongs

♪ Just a bad penny

♪ I always come back to you

♪ Just a bad penny

♪♪

♪ Just a bad penny

♪ I always come back to you

♪ Should have known you couldn't trust me

♪ As far as you could throw me

♪ Couldn't throw me too far

♪ Just a bad penny

♪ Couldn't throw me too far

♪ I think I fucked your girlfriend once

♪♪

♪ Maybe twice, I don't remember

♪ Then I fucked all your friend's girlfriends

♪ Now they hate you

♪ Just a bad penny

♪ Just a bad penny

♪ Such a bad penny

♪ A bad bad penny

♪ Ought to know what a liar I am

♪ Ought to know me by know

♪ Such a bad penny

♪ A bad bad penny

♪ Ought to know what a liar I am

♪ Ought to know me by now ♪