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1
00:01:09,891 --> 00:01:15,819
This is a girl, the girl is lying on a
towel, the towel is lying on the grass.
2
00:01:16,284 --> 00:01:18,211
The grass grows in Hollywood...
3
00:01:18,535 --> 00:01:22,349
which tells you immediately and
very clearly where our picture is laid.
4
00:01:23,239 --> 00:01:27,505
The girl's name is Frosty,
she's a bit player in motion pictures.
5
00:01:27,758 --> 00:01:31,851
Which means that she plays a
little bit here and a little bit there.
6
00:01:32,409 --> 00:01:34,973
She lives in a bungalow
Court like many of the neighbors.
7
00:01:35,492 --> 00:01:38,136
It is always pleasant
to watch the development of...
8
00:01:38,166 --> 00:01:40,794
Big players because
some of them become stars.
9
00:01:41,166 --> 00:01:44,448
And their careers
depend mostly on their talents.
10
00:01:45,100 --> 00:01:48,186
Crystal gazing will never
take the place of girl gazing, will it?
11
00:01:48,216 --> 00:01:52,187
As a matter of fact it is one
of our male natives favorite pastimes.
12
00:01:52,363 --> 00:01:54,635
As they call it the once over.
13
00:01:55,113 --> 00:01:57,385
Well friends, have a
good look at Frosty because...
14
00:01:57,415 --> 00:02:00,229
unfortunately we won't see
much of her in our picture.
15
00:02:01,109 --> 00:02:05,917
Our story is the story of one of her
neighbors, his name is Beauregard Bottomley.
16
00:02:06,169 --> 00:02:07,538
The last scholar...
17
00:02:07,897 --> 00:02:12,774
and in the constant pursuit of
knowledge he reads and reads and reads.
18
00:02:13,305 --> 00:02:16,654
His cornflakes in the morning are well
sprinkled with Schopenhauer.
19
00:02:16,935 --> 00:02:20,257
His blue plate at lunch is balanced
with a generous helping of the latest...
20
00:02:20,287 --> 00:02:22,516
developments in atomic research.
21
00:02:22,940 --> 00:02:27,724
And absolutely
nothing can disturb his brilliant mind.
22
00:02:33,238 --> 00:02:37,637
It's very good Gerald, coming
along nicely. Once more please.
23
00:02:39,682 --> 00:02:43,085
- Not to the other.
- That'll be all Caesar.
24
00:02:44,029 --> 00:02:47,862
- Does Polly want a cracker?
- I want a drink, let's get loaded.
25
00:02:48,503 --> 00:02:50,469
Says the darnest things, doesn't he?
26
00:02:51,165 --> 00:02:53,753
How about a short one? How about a short one?
27
00:02:54,301 --> 00:02:55,922
That's your quarter the day Caesar.
28
00:02:56,400 --> 00:03:00,450
As I told you before Gerald neither my
sister nor I taught him these expressions.
29
00:03:00,614 --> 00:03:04,083
His former master must've been the
greatest reprobate since the Emperor Nero.
30
00:03:04,720 --> 00:03:08,695
We found him one night leaning up against a
lamp post, couldn't remember where he lived.
31
00:03:08,881 --> 00:03:09,972
And he still can't.
32
00:03:10,357 --> 00:03:14,224
Now we have him down to two drinks a day,
soon we'll have him down to no drinks a day.
33
00:03:15,990 --> 00:03:19,600
Now you have
frightened him. Caesar, Caesar...
34
00:03:20,220 --> 00:03:24,700
- Champagne.
- No no sorry, you must rough it for a while.
35
00:03:25,737 --> 00:03:29,176
Would you mind if we cut the lesson short
tonight Gerald, will make it up next time.
36
00:03:29,206 --> 00:03:32,142
- Beauregard and I are going to a show.
- Oh, that's all right,
37
00:03:32,316 --> 00:03:33,552
I'll get ready.
38
00:03:34,136 --> 00:03:36,900
You know Gerald I can't
help admiring your enterprise.
39
00:03:37,664 --> 00:03:40,468
You're late approach to the art
of music is highly commendable.
40
00:03:40,867 --> 00:03:45,518
- I wish you many happy hours at the piano.
- I don't want to learn to play the piano.
41
00:03:46,273 --> 00:03:47,322
Really?
42
00:03:47,685 --> 00:03:50,025
Isn't your procedure of
taking piano lessons rather...
43
00:03:50,055 --> 00:03:52,364
round about for one who
does not wish to play the piano?
44
00:03:52,682 --> 00:03:55,154
I only want to learn
how to play Jingle Bells.
45
00:03:55,472 --> 00:03:59,339
Oh, over there I wish you many
happy hours playing Jingle Bells.
46
00:04:00,044 --> 00:04:03,432
By the way, it's nothing better to
do why not join Gwen and myself.
47
00:04:03,605 --> 00:04:05,639
May turn out to be a very exciting evening.
48
00:04:05,669 --> 00:04:07,642
- I've nothing better to do.
- Fine.
49
00:04:07,672 --> 00:04:09,957
So matter of fact I've nothing at all to do.
50
00:04:11,552 --> 00:04:13,997
Skip the gutter, yeah.
51
00:04:16,083 --> 00:04:18,746
Ladies and gentlemen this is indeed a...
52
00:04:18,776 --> 00:04:22,028
thrilling milestone in
history of cosmic science.
53
00:04:22,355 --> 00:04:27,791
For the first time over television we shall
make an attempt to shoot the moon by radar.
54
00:04:28,188 --> 00:04:33,012
- Sort of the world seeing.
- Its thrilling Beauregard.
55
00:04:33,730 --> 00:04:36,761
The beam will bounce
off the surface of the moon...
56
00:04:36,791 --> 00:04:40,243
and come racing back
through the heavens to this laboratory.
57
00:04:40,681 --> 00:04:47,180
The elapsed time of this stratospheric around
trip will be two point five six four seconds.
58
00:04:48,019 --> 00:04:49,679
Wait a moment, that doesn't sound right.
59
00:04:49,905 --> 00:04:54,410
Come on 39,000 last light ripples on
physics as machine reverse a second
60
00:04:54,636 --> 00:05:01,054
hundred eighty six three hundred into
twice time to understand enemy 5.56, five.
61
00:05:02,742 --> 00:05:09,426
Oh yes, the total elapsed time
will be two point five six five.
62
00:05:09,732 --> 00:05:13,473
- Perfectly understandable mistake.
- Here we go ladies and gentlemen...
63
00:05:13,686 --> 00:05:16,583
I shall now release the radar ray.
64
00:05:19,294 --> 00:05:23,347
- Cosmic message.
- Sounded more like a cosmic raspberry.
65
00:05:24,809 --> 00:05:26,364
And if you ever ride Gerald...
66
00:05:26,603 --> 00:05:30,111
it could very well be the moon's
unflattering opinion of man's puny efforts.
67
00:05:30,537 --> 00:05:36,052
Next week we'll continue our regular
program, Adventures In Science.
68
00:05:36,318 --> 00:05:37,448
Good night all.
69
00:05:37,674 --> 00:05:40,368
- I guess we just made it.
- I'm afraid you've come a little late.
70
00:05:40,398 --> 00:05:42,803
However I'll be very happy to
explain what has just occurred.
71
00:05:42,833 --> 00:05:46,153
- As you know an electronic phenomenon...
- Hi, hi...
72
00:05:46,183 --> 00:05:50,671
- Hi, hi...
- Ho, ho...
73
00:05:50,844 --> 00:05:52,359
what time is it.
74
00:06:00,226 --> 00:06:03,399
Yes sir, is Happy Hogan time, a masquerade...
75
00:06:03,429 --> 00:06:06,751
for money that number one
coast to coast quest for doll.
76
00:06:06,920 --> 00:06:09,954
Now televised
locally and brought to you by...
77
00:06:10,206 --> 00:06:13,488
Milady, the soap that sanctified.
78
00:06:13,518 --> 00:06:16,876
♪ Milady, Milady, the soap... ♪
79
00:06:18,630 --> 00:06:22,400
Oh Mr.Bottomley,
I almost been missing your book.
80
00:06:22,829 --> 00:06:24,636
You remember Frosty, she lives next door.
81
00:06:24,666 --> 00:06:28,256
Oh yes, I hardly recognize you without
your, I mean in your presence attire.
82
00:06:28,468 --> 00:06:33,140
- Oh, I didn't know you were a Hogan fan too.
- I'm not, I don't even know the man.
83
00:06:33,170 --> 00:06:36,720
Oh, I know him personally,
he's a dreamboat and to smart.
84
00:06:36,750 --> 00:06:41,782
And here he is now, the
joyful jolly just full jivey joker...
85
00:06:42,021 --> 00:06:46,088
- that marry made Murphy minster of Magpies.
- Whatever that means.
86
00:06:46,500 --> 00:06:51,329
That Coriolis quizzical
quintessence of query Happy Hogan,
87
00:06:53,536 --> 00:06:57,496
Yes sir, fasten your seat belts, step
in your straitjackets because tonight...
88
00:06:57,655 --> 00:06:58,850
we're going to break it down...
89
00:06:58,880 --> 00:07:03,219
we're going to kick it around, we're
going to throw money, all over it.
90
00:07:03,554 --> 00:07:07,540
We better bon voyage to
this dream go to classes, take away.
91
00:07:07,570 --> 00:07:10,860
This is one of those quiz problems
Beauregard where people win things.
92
00:07:11,050 --> 00:07:12,950
Let's watch for a while, might be fun.
93
00:07:13,295 --> 00:07:16,325
For the one or two people who
may not be familiar with the program...
94
00:07:16,484 --> 00:07:21,029
masquerade karate is a real-life costume
party and here's how we play the game.
95
00:07:21,361 --> 00:07:23,554
Yes sir, the audience appears in a costume...
96
00:07:23,584 --> 00:07:27,235
representing his or her favorite
person, object thing or animal.
97
00:07:27,265 --> 00:07:30,636
Contestants who ask questions about the
person thing their costume represents.
98
00:07:30,666 --> 00:07:34,845
We pay five dollars for the first question
ten dollars for the second question...
99
00:07:34,875 --> 00:07:40,669
and so on until a sixth question which
pays the lovely loot of 160 clinkers.
100
00:07:40,699 --> 00:07:43,381
Yes ladies and gentleman and
at any time during the evening a...
101
00:07:43,411 --> 00:07:46,717
contestant can pocket
the dough and go home happily.
102
00:07:46,747 --> 00:07:49,202
And now let's go laughing
and scratching who's our first cont...
103
00:07:49,879 --> 00:07:55,408
- Oh, isn't she a lovely little thing.
- This guy kills me.
104
00:07:55,847 --> 00:08:00,086
- Who are you supposed to be?
- I am Cleopatra.
105
00:08:02,451 --> 00:08:05,069
What your name in
real life Cleo? Where you from?
106
00:08:05,281 --> 00:08:08,551
My name is Laura Transky
and I come from Brooklyn.
107
00:08:08,723 --> 00:08:10,996
Brooklyn.
108
00:08:14,571 --> 00:08:17,481
I fail to see why the location
of birth should be met with applause.
109
00:08:17,973 --> 00:08:20,365
- But she came from Brooklyn.
- Oh?
110
00:08:20,644 --> 00:08:23,102
Here's your first question
Cleo, now here we go.
111
00:08:23,262 --> 00:08:26,837
Down what river did you float on your barge?
112
00:08:27,381 --> 00:08:31,607
- Well, that's a tough one.
- The Nile?
113
00:08:32,191 --> 00:08:37,534
That is right, that's absolutely right,
you're now the proud possessor of 5 drachmas.
114
00:08:38,783 --> 00:08:41,295
- Stand such good.
- Would you please shut up.
115
00:08:41,680 --> 00:08:43,966
Yes, but I can't let this
go on without a word of warning.
116
00:08:44,390 --> 00:08:47,314
This man is the fore runner of
intellectual destruction in America.
117
00:08:47,712 --> 00:08:50,542
If it is noteworthy and rewarding
to know that 2 and 2 make 4...
118
00:08:50,543 --> 00:08:52,974
to the accompaniment of
deafening applause and prizes...
119
00:08:53,214 --> 00:08:56,629
then 2 and 2 making 4 will become
the top level of learning, good evening.
120
00:08:56,659 --> 00:08:59,473
Gee Mr. Bottomley you sure know a lot.
121
00:08:59,503 --> 00:09:03,756
I not only sure know a lot
my dear Frosty, I know everything.
122
00:09:13,951 --> 00:09:15,864
Yes Mr. Brown, I know everything,
123
00:09:16,091 --> 00:09:18,597
everything except what is commonly
known as how to make a buck.
124
00:09:18,947 --> 00:09:21,419
It certainly isn't easy
to place a scholar Mr. Bottomley.
125
00:09:21,449 --> 00:09:22,589
No it isn't.
126
00:09:23,128 --> 00:09:26,624
No I've been a short order cook a shoe
salesman and heaven knows what else but...
127
00:09:27,049 --> 00:09:29,866
if you know everything you're
not wanted around for long.
128
00:09:30,452 --> 00:09:32,392
And Greek translations don't pay very much.
129
00:09:32,870 --> 00:09:36,034
You know, I may have something here
that's right up your intelligent alley.
130
00:09:36,064 --> 00:09:36,631
Oh?
131
00:09:36,661 --> 00:09:39,581
This company is looking
for a man who is exactly your type.
132
00:09:40,047 --> 00:09:42,186
Something to do with a research survey,
133
00:09:42,611 --> 00:09:45,106
Why don't you take this card
and go see what's is all about?
134
00:09:45,136 --> 00:09:47,421
It's the My Ladies soap company.
135
00:09:48,484 --> 00:09:51,617
Isn't that the, the soap that sanctifies?
136
00:09:51,647 --> 00:09:54,823
Yes, that's the one,
the soap that sanctifies.
137
00:09:55,535 --> 00:10:01,700
Well I can't afford to be choosy, thank you
Mr. Brown, I'm sorry I'm such a problem.
138
00:10:36,658 --> 00:10:46,554
- Good afternoon, won't you come in please?
- Good afternoon, I was sent here by the...
139
00:11:01,174 --> 00:11:03,419
Your name please.
140
00:11:04,668 --> 00:11:07,897
- Your name please.
- Beauregard Bottomley.
141
00:11:09,280 --> 00:11:13,160
Oh yes, we were expecting you.
142
00:11:13,599 --> 00:11:19,579
Please approach the desk,
and fill in the application blank.
143
00:11:45,743 --> 00:11:49,574
Please, lay the form in the slot.
144
00:12:05,639 --> 00:12:11,619
Thank you and make yourself comfortable.
145
00:12:13,865 --> 00:12:15,407
Comfortable?
146
00:12:17,825 --> 00:12:19,433
Ridiculous.
147
00:12:34,224 --> 00:12:40,039
Good afternoon, a nice place you...
148
00:13:00,570 --> 00:13:06,780
Good afternoon as
I was saying to the other gentl...
149
00:13:19,961 --> 00:13:25,537
As I was saying to
the other two gentleman I...
150
00:13:31,810 --> 00:13:33,031
Good afternoon.
151
00:13:33,061 --> 00:13:35,290
Good afternoon, would
you follow me Mr. Bottomley.
152
00:13:35,320 --> 00:13:36,469
Yes.
153
00:13:37,980 --> 00:13:40,704
And sign the application, put it in the slot.
154
00:13:40,734 --> 00:13:43,280
Anything that is known
about this position Mr. Bottomley...
155
00:13:43,310 --> 00:13:45,722
except that it has
something to do with a survey.
156
00:13:52,068 --> 00:13:57,333
It actually originated in the office of
the top executive Mr. Burn Bridgewaters.
157
00:13:57,708 --> 00:14:01,852
It's all very hush-hush and we
simply refer to it as Operation Ladder.
158
00:14:01,882 --> 00:14:03,696
The salary will be $40 a week.
159
00:14:03,726 --> 00:14:07,540
- That satisfactory but not conducive luxury.
160
00:14:07,570 --> 00:14:09,853
- Shall we go up to the penthouse?
- Yeah.
161
00:14:20,259 --> 00:14:24,072
- Operation ladder.
- I believe I found the man.
162
00:14:24,338 --> 00:14:25,773
Go right in.
163
00:14:43,148 --> 00:14:47,062
Mr. Waters is not with us, he's
concentrating, he's on a higher plane.
164
00:14:47,274 --> 00:14:48,230
We must wait.
165
00:14:48,829 --> 00:14:53,778
- Am I to understand he can't see or hear us?
- That's right, won't be long, he'll be back.
166
00:14:55,174 --> 00:14:59,507
How do you do? My time is extremely
valuable, so I can stick away into minutes...
167
00:14:59,537 --> 00:15:03,029
minutes become hours, hours
disappear into days and weeks...
168
00:15:03,059 --> 00:15:06,205
weeks suddenly for months and
months never an habit of becoming years.
169
00:15:06,524 --> 00:15:09,258
I've, I've never quite looked at
it that way but I suppose you're right.
170
00:15:09,288 --> 00:15:13,873
This is a Mr. Bottomley Mr.Waters he hopes
to become a member of Milady's family.
171
00:15:14,073 --> 00:15:19,193
PhD physicist extraordinary, DA Diaz master's
degree at the age of 13.
172
00:15:19,223 --> 00:15:25,850
Rhodes Scholar, PhD DSC, hello thee, all this
tell one thing to me sir, you're a dreamer
173
00:15:25,880 --> 00:15:28,973
- I am adored, we have that straight?
- Oh it's quite, quite.
174
00:15:30,024 --> 00:15:31,326
I have an idea.
175
00:15:31,991 --> 00:15:34,582
I want to find out what
the average man thinks of it.
176
00:15:34,755 --> 00:15:38,157
Then when we find out what he
thinks of it, will the change his thinking.
177
00:15:38,584 --> 00:15:40,120
Change his thinking, naturally.
178
00:15:40,150 --> 00:15:42,929
But I am about to tell
you now is very top secret...
179
00:15:42,959 --> 00:15:46,278
it ranks with the discovery of
electricity and the invention of the wheel.
180
00:15:46,703 --> 00:15:49,162
I am thinking of putting
on the market an all purpose...
181
00:15:49,192 --> 00:15:51,740
cake of soap that would
also be used to clean teeth.
182
00:15:51,939 --> 00:15:56,323
I see, sort of, sort of the
foam of the mouth approach, eh?
183
00:15:59,087 --> 00:16:00,801
You would've started tomorrow morning.
184
00:16:01,332 --> 00:16:05,013
That would've been fine but but aren't
we using rather a strange tense, would've?
185
00:16:05,043 --> 00:16:09,624
No sir, we are not,
I loathe humor and you are humorous.
186
00:16:09,903 --> 00:16:11,431
Just a pleasantry disaster.
187
00:16:11,461 --> 00:16:14,700
Mr Waters hates pleasantries,
I suppose I should've told you.
188
00:16:14,873 --> 00:16:19,033
I'm sorry to have offended you Mr. Waters,
it was unintentional and shan't occur again.
189
00:16:19,259 --> 00:16:22,714
However, I really need a job
and if I may say so I think I would...
190
00:16:22,744 --> 00:16:25,172
be definitely useful
to your highly reputable firm.
191
00:16:25,202 --> 00:16:28,562
I am afraid of you sir,
you would be a poor ambassador...
192
00:16:28,592 --> 00:16:32,389
of goodwill from a lady, this is a deadly
serious world, this world of business.
193
00:16:32,548 --> 00:16:35,113
And at some given moment
she would probably revert to type.
194
00:16:35,312 --> 00:16:37,106
- What would she...
- Why is he talking?
195
00:16:37,136 --> 00:16:39,126
I didn't indicate that I'd finished talking.
196
00:16:39,431 --> 00:16:42,116
- Did I?
- I saw no sign of it sir.
197
00:16:42,461 --> 00:16:45,610
- Oh, I beg your pardon.
- You're the intellectual type.
198
00:16:45,640 --> 00:16:47,869
I despised intellectual types.
199
00:16:47,899 --> 00:16:52,958
You are an improvident grasshopper and I am
an industrious squirrel, nothing personal.
200
00:16:54,142 --> 00:16:56,357
Now just a moment, what
I have to say is quite personal.
201
00:16:56,387 --> 00:17:00,920
If you are a squirrel, you're a very naughty
one, you are also an unmitigated pompous ass.
202
00:17:01,159 --> 00:17:03,554
And an expensive moron.
203
00:17:03,584 --> 00:17:09,185
Is no use, only Mr. Waters is no longer on
this plane with us, shall we steal away.
204
00:17:10,671 --> 00:17:15,309
Do I genuflect upon
leaving or, or just face Mecca?
205
00:17:15,984 --> 00:17:15,985
Just face Mecca that's all.
206
00:17:24,244 --> 00:17:26,243
That's all.
207
00:17:33,381 --> 00:17:38,468
Very cute don't you think?
Burn Bridgewater's discovered him.
208
00:17:42,698 --> 00:17:45,605
Did you get the job? May I congratulate you?
209
00:17:46,799 --> 00:17:52,119
As you know, I didn't get the job,
but congratulations may be in order.
210
00:17:54,585 --> 00:17:58,193
I believe I'd the greatest idea
since the discovery of Happy Hogan.
211
00:17:59,486 --> 00:18:01,758
And now our next contestant...
212
00:18:04,309 --> 00:18:06,476
Sir, what are you supposed to be? A bookie?
213
00:18:07,352 --> 00:18:09,067
Seriously, what do you supposed to represent?
214
00:18:09,293 --> 00:18:11,074
- I am the encyclopedia.
- And the monocle?
215
00:18:11,329 --> 00:18:12,469
Britannica.
216
00:18:13,121 --> 00:18:16,522
Oh, in that case I can ask you any about
anything, if we can ask any about anything...
217
00:18:16,552 --> 00:18:18,395
I will ask you anything about anything.
218
00:18:18,425 --> 00:18:21,424
I'm sure if you ask the questions
that will be a very limited field.
219
00:18:25,158 --> 00:18:27,657
- Well, may I ask you name.
- You may.
220
00:18:28,959 --> 00:18:31,764
- Well what is your day name?
- Beauregard Bottomley.
221
00:18:32,109 --> 00:18:34,634
Would, would you mind repeating that again?
222
00:18:34,664 --> 00:18:38,610
- I would mind, very much.
- Oh, Beauregard Bottomley is it then.
223
00:18:38,915 --> 00:18:43,486
Well, on the questions, but first
here are you six cakes of Milady's soap.
224
00:18:43,714 --> 00:18:46,438
- The soap that removes the dirt like...
- Any other soap?
225
00:18:47,714 --> 00:18:48,963
I notice that.
226
00:18:49,269 --> 00:18:51,861
He's a disappointed office
ticker and effective.
227
00:18:52,313 --> 00:18:55,330
- It's saboteur from lifeboy.
- Yes sir.
228
00:18:55,848 --> 00:18:56,566
Hear.
229
00:18:56,596 --> 00:18:59,290
Here we go for the
first question and 5 dollars.
230
00:19:00,287 --> 00:19:05,629
What Is the name of the first animal
described in the Encyclopedia Britannica?
231
00:19:06,240 --> 00:19:09,828
The aardvark,
spell double A - R - D - V - A - R - K.
232
00:19:09,980 --> 00:19:13,110
- The aardvark is an ant-eater.
- That is absolutely right.
233
00:19:13,257 --> 00:19:15,689
You are now the proud possessor of 5 dollars.
234
00:19:15,955 --> 00:19:20,353
By the way, you said the aardvark is
an ant-eater, is he also an uncle eater?
235
00:19:25,986 --> 00:19:28,710
Yes, as a matter of fact
the aardvark is an uncle eater.
236
00:19:29,016 --> 00:19:31,178
But he only eats the uncles of the ants.
237
00:19:38,232 --> 00:19:44,752
- Ludwig van Beethoven born 1770 died 1827.
- That is absolutely correct.
238
00:19:48,780 --> 00:19:52,082
John Jay was the first
Chief Justice of the Supreme Court.
239
00:19:52,456 --> 00:19:54,283
That is absolutely correct.
240
00:19:57,792 --> 00:20:00,429
Theta is the
eighth letter of the Greek alphabet.
241
00:20:00,658 --> 00:20:02,796
That is absolutely correct.
242
00:20:06,429 --> 00:20:10,854
- 60 home run, hit by Babe Ruth.
- That is absolutely correct.
243
00:20:13,711 --> 00:20:15,200
Here we go for the last question.
244
00:20:15,519 --> 00:20:21,220
Which is farthest East
Las Vegas, Los Angeles or Reno?
245
00:20:21,725 --> 00:20:24,795
- Las Vegas, Nevada.
- That is absolutely right.
246
00:20:26,616 --> 00:20:30,351
Yes sir, you certainly did all right
for yourself tonight Mr. Encyclopedia.
247
00:20:30,497 --> 00:20:35,241
- Here are 160 dollars in folding money.
- Why don't you ask me another question?
248
00:20:35,946 --> 00:20:37,063
Don't be nervous.
249
00:20:46,142 --> 00:20:49,385
Well alright, if the audience
wants us to ask you another question...
250
00:20:49,890 --> 00:20:55,260
we'll ask you another question, but let me
warn you, it's not going to be an easy one.
251
00:20:55,632 --> 00:20:59,153
Here we go for 320 dollars or nothing.
252
00:20:59,339 --> 00:21:04,426
You have five seconds to tell us
the Japanese word for goodbye.
253
00:21:04,456 --> 00:21:06,622
- One, two...
- Sayonara.
254
00:21:07,340 --> 00:21:11,194
Not to be confused with cyanide, which
is of course goodbye in any language.
255
00:21:11,446 --> 00:21:14,702
That is, yes you're absolutely correct.
256
00:21:19,353 --> 00:21:22,955
Ladies and gentlemen, for the first time
in the history of Masquerade for Money...
257
00:21:23,128 --> 00:21:27,141
a contestant has nicked us for 320 dollars.
258
00:21:27,315 --> 00:21:29,388
- And here is your money.
- No, thank you.
259
00:21:29,866 --> 00:21:34,943
Now wait a minute. Really, we're running out
of time, no more questions, no more time.
260
00:21:34,973 --> 00:21:38,012
That's all right, I'll come back next
week when you have more time.
261
00:21:38,330 --> 00:21:39,407
Thank you very much folks.
262
00:21:39,659 --> 00:21:41,693
Your encouragement has been my inspiration.
263
00:21:41,944 --> 00:21:45,200
I'll see you all next week
if they allow me on the program.
264
00:21:57,585 --> 00:22:00,668
- What are you up to?
- Next week, 604 dollars.
265
00:22:00,828 --> 00:22:03,606
I know but don't you see they won't
even let you on the show next week.
266
00:22:03,750 --> 00:22:05,439
Why don't you take the 320?
267
00:22:05,469 --> 00:22:08,043
Because the plan I
have in mind works in the future.
268
00:22:08,073 --> 00:22:11,070
We slowly patronize the 100
dollar window at the Bank of America.
269
00:22:11,100 --> 00:22:13,790
- Beauregard don't you see...
- Be careful Gwen, the enemy approaches.
270
00:22:13,820 --> 00:22:16,956
Say Mr. Bottomley,
fun is fun and all what happened.
271
00:22:17,264 --> 00:22:19,842
I think you better take your
money and forget about next week.
272
00:22:19,872 --> 00:22:22,367
Mr. Hogan may I please have your autograph.
273
00:22:23,071 --> 00:22:25,870
Why do you want a signature?
One X looks like another.
274
00:22:27,005 --> 00:22:29,011
Is it something
special about me you dislike...
275
00:22:29,041 --> 00:22:31,679
Mr. Bottomley or do you
hate me for myself alone?
276
00:22:31,709 --> 00:22:33,384
Oh I don't hate you Mr. Hogan.
277
00:22:33,414 --> 00:22:36,946
He merely thinks you're the fore runner
of intellectual destruction in America.
278
00:22:36,976 --> 00:22:38,421
Yes, nothing personal.
279
00:22:41,364 --> 00:22:43,318
If nobody is going to introduce me...
280
00:22:43,348 --> 00:22:47,132
then I better have to introduce
myself, I'm Beauregard sister, Gwen.
281
00:22:47,311 --> 00:22:50,284
I wouldn't let the news
get around, good night you two.
282
00:22:50,314 --> 00:22:51,789
Don't think it hadn't been charming.
283
00:22:52,506 --> 00:22:54,314
Is a shame we'll never meet again.
284
00:22:54,899 --> 00:22:58,274
You'll never be more spotless
Gwen, you've been sutterly brushed off.
285
00:22:58,580 --> 00:23:01,470
I think he's quite amusing,
you know this is wonderful smile?
286
00:23:01,500 --> 00:23:05,225
Did I? I feel I know
personally each one at his teeth.
287
00:23:12,619 --> 00:23:17,642
It's me greatest idea since the
walking man, I'm glad I thought of it.
288
00:23:18,107 --> 00:23:23,861
We love stretch him out over a period of six
weeks by asking him only one question a week.
289
00:23:23,891 --> 00:23:24,539
Yes sir.
290
00:23:24,569 --> 00:23:26,931
- Pull out all stops on publicity.
- Yes sir.
291
00:23:26,961 --> 00:23:31,409
Build up our audience and our
rating generate a terrific sales campaign.
292
00:23:31,439 --> 00:23:31,906
- Yes sir.
293
00:23:31,917 --> 00:23:35,099
Play up our extreme
generosity and then knock him off.
294
00:23:35,288 --> 00:23:38,053
You ask me, I think we
ought to pay him off right now.
295
00:23:38,318 --> 00:23:39,537
Nobody asks you.
296
00:23:39,714 --> 00:23:41,649
You paid to entertain not to think.
297
00:23:41,839 --> 00:23:43,302
That they may have a thought there.
298
00:23:43,983 --> 00:23:46,251
You know this is a
dangerous precedent we're establishing.
299
00:23:46,831 --> 00:23:49,853
Disorder weakens the size of
our top price 160 dollars.
300
00:23:50,039 --> 00:23:51,510
Not only that but...
301
00:23:52,300 --> 00:23:53,798
I', afraid it's no use Chuck.
302
00:23:54,637 --> 00:23:56,244
I believe he's no longer with us.
303
00:24:39,436 --> 00:24:43,051
- We're definitely progressing.
- I'll drink to it.
304
00:24:43,623 --> 00:24:46,054
Oh, you'd drink to anything.
305
00:24:47,024 --> 00:24:49,749
- Best of luck tonight Mr. Bottomley.
- Thank you.
306
00:24:50,506 --> 00:24:52,221
- Bye Gerald.
- Good bye,
307
00:24:53,896 --> 00:24:55,451
Just what are you made of.
308
00:24:55,481 --> 00:24:58,520
Snips and snails and puppy dogs tails
that's what little boys are made up.
309
00:24:58,550 --> 00:24:59,689
Very funny.
310
00:25:03,250 --> 00:25:06,013
Here you are sitting calmly
and tonight you're answering a...
311
00:25:06,043 --> 00:25:08,392
question for 40,000 dollars or nothing.
312
00:25:08,538 --> 00:25:11,603
Please take the 40,000 dollars if
you win tonight please take it.
313
00:25:11,633 --> 00:25:13,016
I will not.
314
00:25:13,241 --> 00:25:15,793
But you realize what we
can do with 40,000 dollars?
315
00:25:15,823 --> 00:25:18,666
Robbing new prizes much of eighty thousand
dollars four times as much as 160 thousand.
316
00:25:18,696 --> 00:25:21,828
But they won't let you
go on Beauregard, it can't go on.
317
00:25:22,334 --> 00:25:26,653
They'll do something and besides
just one mistake, one little mistake and...
318
00:25:26,919 --> 00:25:28,238
we'll wind up with nothing
319
00:25:28,478 --> 00:25:31,575
I don't believe I've done anything to
justify your lack of confidence in me.
320
00:25:33,263 --> 00:25:39,402
Oh well, are you sure I'm the only
reason for your highly nervous condition.
321
00:25:40,372 --> 00:25:41,834
I don't know what you're talking about.
322
00:25:42,273 --> 00:25:45,980
The fact that happy Hogan is paid no attention
to you I would consider a compliment.
323
00:25:46,499 --> 00:25:48,665
I still don't know what you're talking about.
324
00:25:51,894 --> 00:25:54,379
This will take your mind
off what is your mind is on.
325
00:25:57,422 --> 00:26:02,041
Rock formations in Death Valley.
326
00:26:06,292 --> 00:26:10,672
These persons are not
only hot hard they're mean.
327
00:26:13,384 --> 00:26:15,312
Let's that, keep this.
328
00:26:17,052 --> 00:26:20,693
Well, if it isn't the
brain and another sister.
329
00:26:21,172 --> 00:26:22,859
I'm glad you remember me.
330
00:26:23,040 --> 00:26:28,170
Oh yes, didn't recognize you at
first, you have a hairdo or something.
331
00:26:28,622 --> 00:26:32,500
Beauregard Bottomley, Burn Bridgewaters,
miss Bottomley, Burn Bridgewaters.
332
00:26:32,555 --> 00:26:35,107
- How do you do?
- Oh yes, I've met Mr. Waters.
333
00:26:35,425 --> 00:26:40,144
In a well upholstered torture chamber where he
practices his witchcraft over a bar of soap.
334
00:26:40,509 --> 00:26:41,413
Excuse me.
335
00:26:41,812 --> 00:26:43,845
Mr. Bottomley I would like to thank you.
336
00:26:44,004 --> 00:26:47,336
Through you we have a increased operating.
337
00:26:47,535 --> 00:26:52,319
We've gotten quite a bit of publicity
and seen we have doubled our sales.
338
00:26:52,612 --> 00:26:57,701
D, I couldn't hear better news.
E, I hope the sales increase even more...
339
00:26:57,848 --> 00:27:01,888
and F, it would frighten you
if you knew why I got this way.
340
00:27:09,384 --> 00:27:12,759
And now ladies and gentlemen, we come to
that portion of Masquerade for Money...
341
00:27:12,932 --> 00:27:16,599
reserved for Mr. Beauregard Bottomley.
342
00:27:23,842 --> 00:27:26,088
Quiet please, will he be right...
343
00:27:26,885 --> 00:27:30,048
or will he be wrong, all the
world wonders because tonight...
344
00:27:30,287 --> 00:27:34,380
Beauregard Bottomley is shooting for
forty thousand dollars or nothing...
345
00:27:34,640 --> 00:27:38,181
and now, here comes that thrown up quiz kid.
346
00:27:46,565 --> 00:27:49,237
Well, where's your encyclopedia?
347
00:27:50,008 --> 00:27:54,725
Well see, are you feeling
tonight Mr. Bottomley kind of nervous?
348
00:27:54,871 --> 00:27:57,818
Why should I be nervous? It's your money,
you're losing it. I'm only winning it.
349
00:27:58,472 --> 00:28:01,874
I've seen tonight
question, you will be sorry...
350
00:28:01,904 --> 00:28:06,127
I suppose you stop all this
nonsense and just ask me the question.
351
00:28:07,217 --> 00:28:15,323
You Mr. Bottomley have only to name the second
emperor of the Ming dynasty, that's all.
352
00:28:21,038 --> 00:28:26,115
Of course, it was Jianwen, he was dethroned
by his uncle who became the third emperor.
353
00:28:26,288 --> 00:28:30,301
Strange enough it said Emperor
had three names Zhu Di, Zhu Zu...
354
00:28:30,331 --> 00:28:33,583
That's enough, he wins again.
355
00:28:38,699 --> 00:28:42,566
Quiet, quiet please Mr.Bottomley...
356
00:28:42,871 --> 00:28:45,541
here's your check for $40,000.
357
00:28:45,571 --> 00:28:47,987
Ah, thank you, no money, I should return.
358
00:28:48,902 --> 00:28:52,184
Well gentlemen, is not denying
the fact we're in a very tight spot.
359
00:28:53,234 --> 00:28:56,530
I now believe that we have a
Frankenstein on our hands.
360
00:28:56,531 --> 00:29:00,278
A very well informed
Frankenstein, he must be stopped.
361
00:29:00,427 --> 00:29:03,177
You're absolutely
correct BW, the question is...
362
00:29:03,207 --> 00:29:05,543
Don't use the word question.
363
00:29:06,160 --> 00:29:08,658
Of course is now clear
we've received value for value.
364
00:29:08,688 --> 00:29:13,349
We've certainly gotten 40,000 dollars worth
of prestige, publicity, buildup in sales.
365
00:29:14,027 --> 00:29:16,976
I am now ready to pay off this man
and that will be the end of that.
366
00:29:17,170 --> 00:29:20,489
That's a great idea Burnbridge,
the only trouble is it won't work.
367
00:29:20,848 --> 00:29:24,076
Mark my words, next week
Beauregard Bottomley will be shooting...
368
00:29:24,106 --> 00:29:27,265
- for 80,000 dollars.
- That's great Jack-head.
369
00:29:27,542 --> 00:29:30,394
Thank you, thank you
and good evening Burn Bridgewaters.
370
00:29:30,851 --> 00:29:33,113
- I'll be seeing you.
- Come back here Hogan.
371
00:29:34,229 --> 00:29:38,641
You're in it's right up to your options,
this could very well be the end of radio...
372
00:29:38,671 --> 00:29:41,020
for which you would be directly responsible.
373
00:29:41,206 --> 00:29:42,269
Who me?
374
00:29:42,299 --> 00:29:44,609
You think I enjoy being Joe Schmo...
375
00:29:44,639 --> 00:29:48,267
from Kokomo each week and having
this joker tapped me with his insults.
376
00:29:48,719 --> 00:29:53,224
I don't like it any better than you do, what
do you expect me to do? Go out and shoot him?
377
00:29:58,111 --> 00:30:01,460
No, we mustn't start thinking right.
378
00:30:01,952 --> 00:30:04,261
Why don't you just
refuse the let him on the show?
379
00:30:04,291 --> 00:30:06,621
Let me explain something to you my dear.
380
00:30:06,767 --> 00:30:08,574
If we take Mr. Bottomley off the show the...
381
00:30:08,604 --> 00:30:10,833
people who listen to
our show wouldn't like the idea.
382
00:30:11,099 --> 00:30:14,115
If they don't listen to our show.
383
00:30:14,287 --> 00:30:18,845
If they don't listen our show, our sales
will drop to nothing and we will lose money.
384
00:30:21,955 --> 00:30:24,028
Hope I didn't upset you my dear?
385
00:30:24,453 --> 00:30:27,111
Now let me tell you,
with must board from again.
386
00:30:27,141 --> 00:30:30,127
What do we know about
Beauregard Bottomley? What is he up to?
387
00:30:30,157 --> 00:30:34,947
Who was the woman in his life? Where is
his weakness? Where is he most vulnerable?
388
00:30:34,977 --> 00:30:39,269
- Where can we reach in and twist?
- There's very little to go on chief.
389
00:30:39,469 --> 00:30:43,136
- No weakness, no woman no nothing.
- No hits, no runs, no errors.
390
00:30:44,372 --> 00:30:47,150
He lives in a piano with his sister
who gives bungalow lessons.
391
00:30:51,854 --> 00:30:56,572
Is no such thing as a man without
a weakness, there must be something.
392
00:30:57,409 --> 00:31:01,237
Maybe I can get some inside
information for you Burnbridge.
393
00:31:01,955 --> 00:31:05,131
Care to treat me to a few piano lessons.
394
00:31:08,201 --> 00:31:13,930
I love this boy, I discovered
he's one of the greatest man in radio.
395
00:31:45,980 --> 00:31:50,955
I feel two eyes boring
holes in the back of my skull.
396
00:31:53,853 --> 00:31:57,427
- Hi.
- Mr. Hogan, you are most unwelcome here.
397
00:31:57,693 --> 00:31:58,982
He's taking lessons.
398
00:31:59,408 --> 00:32:04,351
My dear Happy Hogan, at the last counts of a
10482 piano teachers in Greater Los Angeles.
399
00:32:05,400 --> 00:32:08,299
Your appearance
here suggests an ulterior design.
400
00:32:08,458 --> 00:32:10,452
But I think he's
really interested in the piano...
401
00:32:10,482 --> 00:32:13,279
and I'd like us to continue
what we've started, with the piano.
402
00:32:13,309 --> 00:32:16,551
Gwen my dear, you are
unwise in the ways of the world.
403
00:32:16,857 --> 00:32:22,691
This insidious instigator of infamy stands
poised at my vitals with a knife of treachery.
404
00:32:23,634 --> 00:32:28,069
Sticks and stones may break my
bones but names will never hurt me.
405
00:32:29,082 --> 00:32:32,538
The ridiculous idiom
of your profession, get lost.
406
00:32:33,614 --> 00:32:37,947
Am I to understand that you
want me to leave? Don't answer that.
407
00:32:38,531 --> 00:32:43,488
When a charming afternoon up
to a point at this point, I'm leaving.
408
00:32:51,567 --> 00:32:53,932
I refuse to let you
interfere with my business.
409
00:32:54,158 --> 00:32:56,258
I am not your child, I'm not your wife.
410
00:32:56,616 --> 00:33:00,643
I am your sister and I'll give piano
lessons to Gargantua if I wish to.
411
00:33:01,680 --> 00:33:04,166
I would've no objections to Gargantua.
412
00:33:05,534 --> 00:33:10,491
Gwen, surely it must be apparent to you that
this Hogan fellow isn't interested in music.
413
00:33:11,022 --> 00:33:12,869
Oh course not, you think I'm an idiot?
414
00:33:13,095 --> 00:33:15,249
Ah, then you admit
that his motives are shady.
415
00:33:15,966 --> 00:33:18,956
My latest open Burnbridge Waters
are obviously panicked.
416
00:33:18,986 --> 00:33:21,520
They want me off the
air or they want to stop me.
417
00:33:21,706 --> 00:33:25,094
It just doesn't occur to you that
he maybe interested in me, does it?
418
00:33:32,788 --> 00:33:35,393
I know the juvenile crush on Hogan.
419
00:33:35,725 --> 00:33:38,835
I know also that until
today he paid no attention to you.
420
00:33:39,473 --> 00:33:41,785
Sometimes this things take time.
421
00:33:42,130 --> 00:33:48,014
Even last night when you supreme your
presence in a supreme method to enchant him.
422
00:33:48,044 --> 00:33:51,843
He remained, if I may say so,
rather unenchanted, didn't he?
423
00:33:53,823 --> 00:33:57,398
- Perhaps I made a delayed impression.
- Very unlikely.
424
00:33:57,428 --> 00:34:02,926
No my dear, Holden came here to look
for my weak spot, for my Achilles heel.
425
00:34:03,871 --> 00:34:05,492
I suppose you're right.
426
00:34:05,798 --> 00:34:13,082
- There is no need to see him again.
- No, no need.
427
00:34:19,701 --> 00:34:23,231
I can't tell you how much I
appreciate you letting me see you.
428
00:34:24,840 --> 00:34:28,318
- I know your brother would object...
- Violently.
429
00:34:29,568 --> 00:34:35,482
Your brother is a very intelligent man but he
doesn't seem to know anything about love.
430
00:34:38,025 --> 00:34:42,074
Tell me Gwen, isn't
there some woman in his life.
431
00:34:44,488 --> 00:34:50,717
Not at the moment, you see Beauregard wants
woman who's not only beautiful but brilliant.
432
00:34:51,185 --> 00:34:58,686
- And hard to find.
- Gwen, I'm lucky, I found one.
433
00:35:10,393 --> 00:35:13,949
You know, my brother thinks you seeing me
in order to get some information about him.
434
00:35:16,233 --> 00:35:17,324
I think so too.
435
00:35:18,910 --> 00:35:25,302
- In other words, I'm heel?
- Not another words Same words.
436
00:35:28,458 --> 00:35:32,430
And why did you come here?
Why did you let me kiss you?
437
00:35:33,962 --> 00:35:36,583
Because I like you very much.
438
00:35:37,648 --> 00:35:40,593
You like me even you think I'm a heel?
439
00:35:43,487 --> 00:35:44,914
Isn't it awful?
440
00:35:48,314 --> 00:35:52,338
I, I think you're the most terrific
girl I've ever met in my life.
441
00:35:53,324 --> 00:35:56,880
- I'm wonderful.
- And I really mean it.
442
00:35:59,165 --> 00:36:06,121
You and your brother were both right,
I did come looking for information.
443
00:36:07,497 --> 00:36:14,012
I'm glad I did because I
found something really important.
444
00:36:22,733 --> 00:36:25,329
You know I want him to stop too.
445
00:36:26,244 --> 00:36:29,663
We should take the money
because we need it, he won't.
446
00:36:30,520 --> 00:36:31,837
He's out to get them.
447
00:36:32,980 --> 00:36:38,110
He has estimate Milady soap
company is worth 40 million dollars.
448
00:36:39,474 --> 00:36:42,880
And he wins 40 million dollars to stop.
449
00:36:50,508 --> 00:36:52,833
Happy boy, I knew you'd do it, how did it go?
450
00:36:52,863 --> 00:36:53,627
Fine.
451
00:36:53,657 --> 00:36:56,842
I'm seldom grateful to anybody but
I've certainly got to hand it to you.
452
00:36:56,872 --> 00:37:00,858
- Put it here boy, put it here.
- It was your idea and it turned out great.
453
00:37:00,888 --> 00:37:02,296
What's the score Happy boy?
454
00:37:02,326 --> 00:37:05,230
As for Beauregard Bottomley
having a personal weakness...
455
00:37:05,260 --> 00:37:09,087
he has none, there are no vices,
there's no woman at the moment.
456
00:37:09,233 --> 00:37:12,715
What are you telling me boy?
Why are you letting me shake your hand?
457
00:37:12,901 --> 00:37:15,944
- Did he agree to stop?
- His sister wants him to stop.
458
00:37:15,974 --> 00:37:18,297
Oh, great, great that old Holden thought.
459
00:37:18,327 --> 00:37:20,370
Sit down, you convinced it?
460
00:37:20,400 --> 00:37:23,612
Well I didn't have to,
you see she's felt this way all along.
461
00:37:23,784 --> 00:37:26,788
However, she doesn't have the
slightest influence on her brother.
462
00:37:26,948 --> 00:37:30,603
Why are you telling me my
ideas so great, you knuckle knob?
463
00:37:30,633 --> 00:37:32,158
What do you so happy about?
464
00:37:32,344 --> 00:37:34,284
I fell in love with Gwen Bottomley.
465
00:37:34,314 --> 00:37:36,835
How dare you fall in love on my time?
466
00:37:36,865 --> 00:37:40,185
This is dishonest, treacherous
and un-American, get out of here.
467
00:37:40,410 --> 00:37:43,494
Don't you want to know
what Beauregard Bottomley is up to?
468
00:37:44,065 --> 00:37:48,330
Better get your pills out
Burnbridge, hold on to your hat.
469
00:37:48,650 --> 00:37:50,921
Do you know what Bottomley wants?
470
00:37:51,426 --> 00:37:56,529
He wants your blood and he has it figured
out at forty million dollars worth.
471
00:37:57,061 --> 00:37:59,293
He's after every nickel and dime.
472
00:37:59,440 --> 00:38:02,670
Every building and
factory, every hunk of stock.
473
00:38:02,829 --> 00:38:05,088
Every barn, flake of soap.
474
00:38:05,261 --> 00:38:09,234
Every stick of
furniture, all the executives in fact...
475
00:38:09,686 --> 00:38:13,288
everything that belongs to
Milady soap company.
476
00:38:13,880 --> 00:38:15,853
This is George Fisher in Hollywood.
477
00:38:16,044 --> 00:38:17,200
Here something hot...
478
00:38:17,347 --> 00:38:20,975
news has just come in off the wire
that the contest we've all been following...
479
00:38:21,005 --> 00:38:22,769
feverishly is now over.
480
00:38:22,942 --> 00:38:25,454
Masquerade for Money is off the air.
481
00:38:25,679 --> 00:38:31,261
A check for 40,000 dollars has been given to
Beauregard Bottomley and that seems to be that.
482
00:38:31,580 --> 00:38:34,943
Now the latest news
from the Phil colony is that, but wait...
483
00:38:35,528 --> 00:38:39,797
here's the new development ladies and gentlemen,
Beauregard Bottomley has refused...
484
00:38:39,798 --> 00:38:43,149
I said refused the check for 40,000 dollars.
485
00:38:43,540 --> 00:38:46,823
What he hopes to gain by this I
don't know but I take you want to know...
486
00:38:46,853 --> 00:38:49,521
especially the members of the
Beauregard Bottomley fan clubs...
487
00:38:49,746 --> 00:38:51,195
not to telephone the station.
488
00:38:51,607 --> 00:38:54,955
We'll bring you the latest news as
soon as it flashes across our wires.
489
00:38:55,274 --> 00:39:00,050
In the meantime, we'll all await further
developments, now on to the Hollywood news...
490
00:39:05,843 --> 00:39:08,634
Three cheers for Beauregard Bottomley.
491
00:39:14,815 --> 00:39:17,114
Hold on everybody, quiet please.
492
00:39:17,499 --> 00:39:20,768
And now Mr. Bottomley, would you
mind telling us why you refused the...
493
00:39:20,798 --> 00:39:23,958
40,000 dollars offer to you by the
Masquerade for Money program.
494
00:39:24,143 --> 00:39:28,551
I refused the $40,000 simply because
I've no intention of ending the contest.
495
00:39:29,498 --> 00:39:32,275
But Mr. Bottomley, the
program is no longer on the air.
496
00:39:32,462 --> 00:39:36,781
Well, I'm sure that Masquerade for Money
will be on the air again very shortly...
497
00:39:37,060 --> 00:39:38,987
and I will be on the program.
498
00:39:42,217 --> 00:39:46,709
Tremendous acclaim probes I am not
alone in my fight to end the Stone-head age.
499
00:39:47,054 --> 00:39:49,034
And the public
will see to it that I continue.
500
00:40:05,805 --> 00:40:07,931
Ah, there's good news tonight after all.
501
00:40:08,409 --> 00:40:11,014
Masquerade for
Money is going back on the air.
502
00:40:11,705 --> 00:40:15,399
And the reason for that decision
can be told in just two words...
503
00:40:16,024 --> 00:40:17,140
no soap.
504
00:40:17,791 --> 00:40:21,471
Not one bar of Milady soap was sold
over the counters of America...
505
00:40:22,079 --> 00:40:25,511
since Beauregard Bottomley
was forced off the air.
506
00:40:26,361 --> 00:40:31,504
And so once again Mr. & Mrs. John
Public proved their word is final.
507
00:40:35,182 --> 00:40:39,461
The difference of that
streak is around 20,000 cycles.
508
00:40:39,713 --> 00:40:42,769
That is absolutely correct.
509
00:40:52,337 --> 00:40:56,799
The Upper Cretaceous deposits of the
Alborz mountain region of Persia...
510
00:40:56,829 --> 00:41:02,088
consist of limestone, locally hyporitic
and fossiliferous mines out in Dajunas.
511
00:41:02,118 --> 00:41:04,431
That is absolutely correct.
512
00:41:09,866 --> 00:41:12,803
The molar of an Asiatic
elephant is 24 plates.
513
00:41:12,833 --> 00:41:14,942
That is roughly correct.
514
00:41:27,394 --> 00:41:28,749
Quiz programs?
515
00:41:31,168 --> 00:41:34,942
I was one of the first people in
this country to think of quiz programs.
516
00:41:36,071 --> 00:41:41,214
I discovered Hattie Hook,
I dreamed up Masquerade for Money.
517
00:41:42,928 --> 00:41:46,463
I could've hired
Beauregard Bottomley for $40 a week.
518
00:41:47,326 --> 00:41:51,818
I wanted him to continue
on the show, all my fault.
519
00:41:53,824 --> 00:41:56,229
But I won't admit it even to myself...
520
00:41:56,259 --> 00:41:57,877
Mr. Waters Mr.Waters, Beauregard Bottomley is in the
building he's demanding to be shown to the plant.
521
00:41:58,037 --> 00:42:01,345
Beauregard Bottomley is in the building,
he's demanding to be shown to the plant.
522
00:42:01,375 --> 00:42:04,070
He said he wants to acquaint
himself with his future holding.
523
00:42:04,100 --> 00:42:07,764
Roaring mouse, destroy him,
have him arrested. No, wait a minute.
524
00:42:09,199 --> 00:42:13,877
Not letting me, of course
that's the way to do it, let him in.
525
00:42:13,907 --> 00:42:16,349
You're not thinking of
doing anything desperate, are you?
526
00:42:17,757 --> 00:42:19,723
You do care for me, don't you?
527
00:42:20,130 --> 00:42:24,055
That's sweet of you, remind me
to ask you later what you're doing to.
528
00:43:28,537 --> 00:43:30,197
Never thought me kill him.
529
00:43:31,268 --> 00:43:33,413
Oh, high lama of lepers.
530
00:43:34,423 --> 00:43:36,615
285 degrees centigrade I presume.
531
00:43:37,134 --> 00:43:40,175
And you're replacing the hydrogen of an
acid with a hydrocarbon radical.
532
00:43:40,322 --> 00:43:43,604
How do you know?
Oh silly of me, I excuse that.
533
00:43:48,574 --> 00:43:51,245
I can't be expected to do everything.
534
00:43:51,604 --> 00:43:53,438
So you know that one gesture of yours...
535
00:43:53,468 --> 00:43:57,797
that one gesture shows me that you
are a man of tremendous executive ability.
536
00:43:58,184 --> 00:44:01,838
I just had the greatest idea
since the discovery of fire.
537
00:44:02,290 --> 00:44:05,851
I will bath the world physically
and you will cleanse it mentally.
538
00:44:05,881 --> 00:44:10,157
Together we will bring about a spotless
sparkling world, how does it hit you?
539
00:44:10,370 --> 00:44:13,160
If I understand you correctly,
you're offering me a job?
540
00:44:13,161 --> 00:44:15,260
Not a job, the Vice-presidency...
541
00:44:15,290 --> 00:44:18,459
as if though Caesar joined
forces with Alexander the Great.
542
00:44:18,489 --> 00:44:20,802
- That was over 300 years apart.
- Never mind.
543
00:44:20,832 --> 00:44:24,590
- I am prepared to offer you not only the...
- You're no prepared to offer me nothing.
544
00:44:24,802 --> 00:44:29,029
Frankly my dear Burnbridge, you are
living on borrowed soap flakes.
545
00:44:29,999 --> 00:44:34,926
I see, well this
doesn't come as a surprise to me.
546
00:44:34,956 --> 00:44:39,939
- My house is in order, I've prepared myself.
- I Find that very difficult to believe.
547
00:44:40,817 --> 00:44:43,740
Beauregard, I like you.
548
00:44:44,352 --> 00:44:46,997
I like you because you are an honest man.
549
00:44:47,436 --> 00:44:50,705
And it's because I like you
that I feel I must now warn you.
550
00:44:51,010 --> 00:44:54,758
You were headed for trouble,
you're about to link arms with misery.
551
00:44:56,246 --> 00:44:57,800
Aren't you going to ask me why?
552
00:45:02,158 --> 00:45:03,713
Then I will tell you why.
553
00:45:04,842 --> 00:45:06,118
Beauregard...
554
00:45:07,222 --> 00:45:08,856
it's terrible to have money.
555
00:45:09,707 --> 00:45:13,747
It's frightening to be wealthy,
it's disastrous to be loaded.
556
00:45:14,225 --> 00:45:17,544
Do you know what I had to
show for my life's work tiles?
557
00:45:17,574 --> 00:45:21,891
Green pills to be taken after yellow pills.
Purple pills to be taken before green pills.
558
00:45:22,172 --> 00:45:26,451
Alters the nerves, alters the
shriek nerves, the jingle jangle...
559
00:45:26,481 --> 00:45:27,976
- Jingle.
- Jingle.
560
00:45:30,411 --> 00:45:32,790
- Well, money won't buy you a new summer.
- Right.
561
00:45:33,297 --> 00:45:34,426
I'll make a snip at night.
562
00:45:34,456 --> 00:45:37,190
Right. Oh, you were so
brilliant, taxes, stocks, bonds.
563
00:45:37,376 --> 00:45:39,024
Payroll, up keep bill.
564
00:45:39,054 --> 00:45:43,228
Right Beauregard, but don't let them do it
you, I can take it, I don't count anymore.
565
00:45:43,258 --> 00:45:46,040
They've wrecked me
but don't let it happen to you.
566
00:45:46,628 --> 00:45:50,546
- How can I ever thank you Burnbridge?
- Oh, don't thank me Beauregard.
567
00:45:50,547 --> 00:45:54,014
Just stay as you are
walk out of here into the sunshine...
568
00:45:54,017 --> 00:45:57,878
of a carefree world, wise in the
knowledge that I have bestowed upon you.
569
00:45:58,169 --> 00:46:03,415
For it is my sincere conviction that the
only way to be happy is to be poor.
570
00:46:04,128 --> 00:46:06,534
My dear Burnbridge, I see your point.
571
00:46:06,986 --> 00:46:11,770
I am about to make you
the happiest man in the world.
572
00:46:13,285 --> 00:46:17,308
Get out of here, you'll see,
get out of this building immediately.
573
00:46:17,309 --> 00:46:21,042
And when I takeover in two weeks,
victory clock, no reception please.
574
00:46:21,072 --> 00:46:26,135
- And clean up the plant, won't you? Goodbye.
- I've tried to be nice to you.
575
00:46:26,165 --> 00:46:31,863
But you wouldn't have it that way.
Well, you aren't in yet, this is war.
576
00:46:37,858 --> 00:46:39,066
Ah, taxi.
577
00:46:44,470 --> 00:46:45,913
No, it doesn't matter, sorry.
578
00:46:47,739 --> 00:46:50,011
Do I need some cash?
579
00:46:51,433 --> 00:46:53,386
Could he picked my pocket?
580
00:46:55,658 --> 00:46:57,970
How are you feeling, improving I hope?
581
00:46:58,000 --> 00:47:02,337
All the invading bacilli are on the run,
and I'm feeling much better, thanks
582
00:47:02,629 --> 00:47:04,692
- I'll be right back Beauregard.
- Thanks Gwen.
583
00:47:05,029 --> 00:47:09,288
You know, I don't believe in any of that stuff.
You see I'm a member of the old school...
584
00:47:09,318 --> 00:47:12,514
and the old schools, the
best school when it comes to...
585
00:47:12,697 --> 00:47:14,276
this sort of thing you...
586
00:47:14,306 --> 00:47:18,182
Now, if you could only get some Indian herbs
and tie them around your neck, better do it.
587
00:47:18,340 --> 00:47:24,794
Jim Dandy look at this split but you
can't get any Indian herbs these days.
588
00:47:25,113 --> 00:47:28,304
- Oh, what you needs a good hot rum drink.
- Sure.
589
00:47:30,723 --> 00:47:32,716
He wants to get loaded.
590
00:47:34,218 --> 00:47:38,603
Friends, countryman, vice-president...
591
00:47:38,909 --> 00:47:41,540
I come to bury Bottomley.
592
00:47:41,570 --> 00:47:46,045
I have found a secret weapon
which sure destroy him at last.
593
00:47:46,223 --> 00:47:51,486
Beauregard Bottomley is been infallible
up to now because his mind is undisturbed.
594
00:47:51,516 --> 00:47:57,400
And what I ask you fellow
workers is disturbs a man's life.
595
00:48:04,138 --> 00:48:07,699
Bottomley is looking for
perfection in a woman too.
596
00:48:07,729 --> 00:48:11,899
Well, my dear friends,
I know of such a perfect creature.
597
00:48:12,191 --> 00:48:15,606
Her name is Flame O'Neill.
598
00:48:15,766 --> 00:48:20,949
She's a corn-fed Mata Hari,
her mind is as sharp as a razor's edge.
599
00:48:20,979 --> 00:48:24,988
She has everything, except a heart.
600
00:48:27,434 --> 00:48:31,008
And we're exceedingly
lucky, she is available now.
601
00:48:31,155 --> 00:48:33,015
Health services to Milady soap...
602
00:48:33,045 --> 00:48:36,696
will go down in
history as a shining example...
603
00:48:36,975 --> 00:48:41,301
of foul play in our time.
604
00:48:54,802 --> 00:48:57,871
You've a temperature of 95 de...
605
00:49:01,513 --> 00:49:02,949
- 94 degrees,
606
00:49:03,560 --> 00:49:07,559
I think you're very charming Frosty and very
considered to come over and take care of me.
607
00:49:07,589 --> 00:49:12,357
Oh, do you really think I'm very charming?
I think you're very charming too.
608
00:49:12,700 --> 00:49:17,177
But you're the only man who doesn't
pay any attention to me and I don't like it.
609
00:49:17,207 --> 00:49:19,252
But I do pay attention to you Frosty...
610
00:49:19,282 --> 00:49:21,804
you make it impossible
to overlook your many qualities.
611
00:49:21,990 --> 00:49:26,947
But you see, you represent
the fine arts, I am a man of science.
612
00:49:27,373 --> 00:49:31,612
Oh, it sounds beautiful and kind of dull.
613
00:49:42,811 --> 00:49:45,881
- How is Mr. Bottomley this evening?
- Oh, he's fine, fine.
614
00:49:45,911 --> 00:49:48,697
- Would you show me to his room please?
- He's in there.
615
00:49:50,337 --> 00:49:52,118
But you can't go in there, he's sick.
616
00:49:57,169 --> 00:49:58,670
Good evening.
617
00:49:58,962 --> 00:50:02,657
I'm a present from the Billings
Montana Beauregard Bottomley fan club.
618
00:50:04,132 --> 00:50:06,657
What a charming practical person.
619
00:50:07,946 --> 00:50:10,431
What they worried so
much because of your illness that I...
620
00:50:10,962 --> 00:50:14,159
Well, here I am, my name is Flame O'Neal.
621
00:50:14,451 --> 00:50:17,468
- Slick-chick.
- Thank you. Oh?
622
00:50:25,187 --> 00:50:29,556
You know, it will be difficult to express my
appreciation to you and to the fan club...
623
00:50:29,844 --> 00:50:35,414
- but there's nothing seriously wrong with me.
- Your pulse is rather rapid.
624
00:50:36,488 --> 00:50:39,534
Since is my responsibility
to see to it that you recover.
625
00:50:40,166 --> 00:50:42,834
I intend to see that you do recover.
626
00:50:43,323 --> 00:50:46,681
Oh, but I assure you I'm perfectly
capable of looking after myself.
627
00:50:49,798 --> 00:50:51,890
- What's your name dear?
- Frosty.
628
00:50:52,049 --> 00:50:54,352
- Good night Frosty.
- She's a very good friend.
629
00:50:54,589 --> 00:50:58,483
How nice, but it's getting late and
the Sandman will soon be here.
630
00:50:59,359 --> 00:51:01,911
- Your nurse.
- She's charming.
631
00:51:14,057 --> 00:51:17,406
You don't show that must be a great
many people elsewhere who need Jersey...
632
00:51:17,436 --> 00:51:19,483
I, I never go to the sleep before midnight.
633
00:51:19,513 --> 00:51:22,193
You don't usually have a cold
before midnight evening, do you?
634
00:51:25,915 --> 00:51:29,967
- And I always read myself to sleep.
- Now, don't be a difficult one.
635
00:51:31,177 --> 00:51:36,107
Oh yes, the new Schlesinger book,
Your mind through darkest matter.
636
00:51:36,294 --> 00:51:40,200
- Interesting but somehow violent.
- You've read that book?
637
00:51:41,037 --> 00:51:43,562
You're not the only one who
read these books Mr. Bottomley.
638
00:51:46,181 --> 00:51:48,466
You have to go to bed now too.
639
00:51:54,420 --> 00:51:56,573
I take that you don't agree with Schlesinger.
640
00:51:56,959 --> 00:52:00,348
Oh, I share his opinion
that mind can influence matter.
641
00:52:00,852 --> 00:52:03,107
But I find it very
difficult go along with a theory...
642
00:52:03,137 --> 00:52:05,746
that in the future we may
be able to move concrete objects...
643
00:52:05,776 --> 00:52:08,616
such as chairs and
tables by sheer force of will.
644
00:52:08,802 --> 00:52:12,754
Oh yes, I agree with you, Schlesinger
has a tendency to go overboard.
645
00:52:12,980 --> 00:52:15,060
However, from the philosophical approach...
646
00:52:15,090 --> 00:52:18,973
Then is tense that this lesson gentle
came in for the night too, shall we?
647
00:52:24,705 --> 00:52:26,942
I'm, I'm afraid we,
we've no room for you here.
648
00:52:27,333 --> 00:52:29,561
Any time you need
me don't hesitate to call me.
649
00:52:32,219 --> 00:52:36,351
- Pleasant dreams.
- Really?
650
00:52:37,390 --> 00:52:45,239
Pleasant dreams indeed.
Intention of dreaming, intention of sleeping.
651
00:52:47,150 --> 00:52:52,154
What on earth is she doing out there?
Where, where's Gwen?
652
00:52:52,507 --> 00:52:58,010
Why am I tight in? I know been tighted.
653
00:53:02,329 --> 00:53:04,405
You can be stuffed, you know.
654
00:53:07,665 --> 00:53:09,949
Flame O'Neil?
655
00:53:11,963 --> 00:53:18,961
Attractive, charming, take her well informed.
656
00:53:20,311 --> 00:53:22,512
Schlesinger?
657
00:53:23,613 --> 00:53:30,329
However, I wish to read, I shall read.
658
00:54:03,647 --> 00:54:07,738
- Are you going to sleep here?
- It's truly.
659
00:54:17,933 --> 00:54:20,093
Quiet Caesar.
660
00:54:23,851 --> 00:54:27,356
Is not what you were
saying about Schlesinger...
661
00:54:28,996 --> 00:54:35,650
when you thought your opinion
of his theory of thoughts persons...
662
00:54:40,666 --> 00:54:44,195
- You sleep?
- Are you a quid?
663
00:54:55,621 --> 00:55:00,107
- Would you please put out the light?
- Sorry, I thought you were asleep.
664
00:55:00,137 --> 00:55:03,554
I'm not, I would like to be but I'm not.
665
00:55:32,909 --> 00:55:35,618
Why didn't you call me? That's why I'm here.
666
00:55:35,847 --> 00:55:38,057
- What did you want? Some water?
- Well I...
667
00:55:42,491 --> 00:55:46,426
- You are really thirsty, are you?
- No, I'm afraid I'm not. Such a child.
668
00:55:47,275 --> 00:55:49,145
You're such a child.
669
00:55:49,371 --> 00:55:52,905
But that's only natural I suppose,
great men see to preserve this quality.
670
00:55:54,460 --> 00:55:56,092
What is it that really bothers you?
671
00:55:56,252 --> 00:56:00,105
I don't know or perhaps, as a bachelor...
672
00:56:00,250 --> 00:56:02,658
I'm simply not used to a
charming woman sharing my eye.
673
00:56:02,662 --> 00:56:04,783
Try not to think of me as one.
674
00:56:05,340 --> 00:56:06,838
Think of me as a nurse.
675
00:56:21,814 --> 00:56:23,515
Good night nurse.
676
00:56:32,220 --> 00:56:37,336
- Would you mind putting out the light please?
- Yes, certainly.
677
00:57:16,620 --> 00:57:19,605
- What you laughing at?
- Nothing.
678
00:57:25,671 --> 00:57:32,874
- Something I said or did fast?
- No, it was nothing. Really, nothing at all.
679
00:57:35,697 --> 00:57:39,428
Isn't funny, one doesn't
laugh at nothing, does one?
680
00:57:39,458 --> 00:57:42,900
Whatever I mean is, why does one?
681
00:57:43,191 --> 00:57:47,604
But I, I just happened to think of
something that struck me as funny.
682
00:57:47,634 --> 00:57:49,747
- That's what?
- Oh I...
683
00:57:49,777 --> 00:57:52,373
I couldn't tell you, really I couldn't.
684
00:58:28,029 --> 00:58:31,534
- Flame, may I ask you a question?
- Yes.
685
00:58:32,079 --> 00:58:35,167
Three nights ago when you
entered my life on the wings of mercy...
686
00:58:35,197 --> 00:58:40,491
- you laughed before you went to sleep, why?
- Oh, I couldn't possibly tell you.
687
00:58:40,521 --> 00:58:43,928
The least of the decency to tell
me one thing, did it concern me?
688
00:58:43,958 --> 00:58:45,647
Yes.
689
00:58:46,653 --> 00:58:51,263
- Beauregard my conscience is bothering me.
- Why?
690
00:58:51,558 --> 00:58:54,863
Well, now that your health is completely
restored I consider unethical to remain...
691
00:58:54,874 --> 00:58:58,647
any longer in the employ of the Billings
Montana Beauregard Bottomley fan club.
692
00:58:58,812 --> 00:59:01,719
Yes, I still don't feel right, you know,
when I turn abruptly my back...
693
00:59:01,749 --> 00:59:04,285
- Can you help me drink water?
- Just something...
694
00:59:04,766 --> 00:59:08,634
well it may be honest areas patients a.
695
00:59:10,641 --> 00:59:14,588
- Beauregard, this is our last day.
- Last day?
696
00:59:14,618 --> 00:59:17,707
Well, maybe out last day
as patient and nurse, but...
697
00:59:17,737 --> 00:59:20,633
Can't we see each other when we're healthy?
698
00:59:20,663 --> 00:59:23,916
But of course I rather hope we'd
see each other from time to time.
699
00:59:24,301 --> 00:59:27,769
I would miss terribly the
brilliance of your wonderful mind.
700
00:59:28,268 --> 00:59:30,533
I know, but isn't there something
else about you might miss?
701
00:59:30,563 --> 00:59:34,754
- What I mean is I admire your mind too.
- Thank you.
702
00:59:35,112 --> 00:59:37,212
It doesn't stop there.
703
00:59:38,302 --> 00:59:40,787
What is it actually that you mean Beauregard?
704
00:59:40,972 --> 00:59:44,428
- Can I have a drink of water?
- Well, what time...
705
00:59:44,693 --> 00:59:48,069
No darling, great-daddy is tired, run along.
706
00:59:48,720 --> 00:59:50,328
Should we run along too?
707
00:59:53,198 --> 00:59:56,494
- May I help you.
- Thanks daddy.
708
00:59:58,661 --> 01:00:01,956
Seem I'm a little inarticulate when it
comes to this sort of thing but...
709
01:00:03,250 --> 01:00:05,758
would you have dinner with
me tomorrow night at my place.
710
01:00:06,263 --> 01:00:10,791
I'd love to. Now it's time for
your acetylsalicylic acid.
711
01:00:21,400 --> 01:00:22,860
- Going out?
- I didn't get my invitation in the mail.
712
01:00:22,890 --> 01:00:25,294
Well, I didn't get my
invitation in the mail this morning...
713
01:00:25,324 --> 01:00:27,727
so I decided I better
make other arrangements.
714
01:00:27,757 --> 01:00:29,979
I've a date with Happy Hogan, any objection?
715
01:00:30,009 --> 01:00:32,799
Many objections, but if you can't beat them.
716
01:00:32,829 --> 01:00:37,215
If you must make a fool of
yourself, go ahead, make a fool of yourself.
717
01:00:37,374 --> 01:00:39,607
- You know, here.
- Oh, thank you.
718
01:00:39,780 --> 01:00:42,185
I'm much more
generous than you are, Beauregard.
719
01:00:42,571 --> 01:00:45,162
I don't object you're
making a fool of yourself.
720
01:00:45,495 --> 01:00:50,213
Are you comparing my friendship with Flame
with your giddy infatuation for Happy Hogan?
721
01:00:50,385 --> 01:00:52,791
- I am.
- Let me tell you.
722
01:00:53,654 --> 01:00:56,724
Comparison is odious
and extremely distasteful to me.
723
01:00:57,827 --> 01:01:00,990
Hogan is a wise cracking treacherous moron,
724
01:01:01,020 --> 01:01:05,163
Flame is a charming cultivated lovely lady.
725
01:01:05,801 --> 01:01:09,987
I doubt her cultivation and a
little wary of the lady's charming.
726
01:01:10,359 --> 01:01:14,615
And the rather old routine of the
invalid falling in love with the nurse...
727
01:01:14,868 --> 01:01:17,818
must seem a little
corny even to you Beauregard.
728
01:01:18,070 --> 01:01:21,817
But who cares, everybody else
makes a few mistakes in this world...
729
01:01:22,004 --> 01:01:25,446
and it's nice to see that you've
gotten around to making a few yourself.
730
01:01:26,270 --> 01:01:27,214
Good night.
731
01:01:31,286 --> 01:01:34,245
Ah, we mustn't be
too critical of Gwen Caesar.
732
01:01:36,295 --> 01:01:42,058
When people fall
in love, they often act foolishly.
733
01:02:21,951 --> 01:02:25,325
I feel I can report a
certain degree of success already.
734
01:02:25,585 --> 01:02:30,128
I've managed to introduce a rather
disorganized state of pleasant chaos.,
735
01:02:30,413 --> 01:02:36,928
He is uncertain,
puzzle, upset and bewildered.
736
01:02:36,958 --> 01:02:40,743
Of course, of course, all
this has happened tome many times.
737
01:02:41,600 --> 01:02:44,351
But it's such a lovely
way to become bewildered.
738
01:02:44,767 --> 01:02:46,863
Perhaps after all
of this is over you and I can...
739
01:02:46,893 --> 01:02:49,595
become confused together, you're very lovely.
740
01:02:49,797 --> 01:02:51,296
Never mind that.
741
01:02:52,688 --> 01:02:55,676
Tomorrow night I plan
to apply the coup de grace.
742
01:02:55,706 --> 01:02:56,696
Why not tonight?
743
01:02:57,930 --> 01:03:00,514
Because tonight I have a date.
744
01:03:01,056 --> 01:03:05,479
- I will not show up.
- Gorgeous, gorgeous a beautifully naughty.
745
01:03:06,289 --> 01:03:08,381
You will not be able to
reach me until tomorrow morning.
746
01:03:09,105 --> 01:03:12,837
My explanation for breaking the
date will be vague and uneasy.
747
01:03:13,177 --> 01:03:15,335
He'll wonder whether
I was out with another man.
748
01:03:16,366 --> 01:03:17,961
I'll allow him to wonder,
749
01:03:18,205 --> 01:03:23,489
He'll become angry and will have to ask for
my forgiveness for being angry and then...
750
01:03:24,371 --> 01:03:26,189
why am I telling you all this?
751
01:03:26,219 --> 01:03:29,006
I'm sure you've
been through it all many times.
752
01:03:29,527 --> 01:03:30,707
- Yeah.
- Yes.
753
01:03:31,388 --> 01:03:34,014
My only regret is
that I didn't think of it sooner.
754
01:03:34,811 --> 01:03:38,862
Now Beauregard Bottomley will be
pulled down from his proud pinnacle...
755
01:03:38,892 --> 01:03:44,072
enjoying the vast army of us men
who've been driven nuts by women.
756
01:03:46,518 --> 01:03:51,717
Where is she? Where doesn't she? About time.
757
01:03:53,344 --> 01:03:59,096
- Darling, what happened?
- Nothing happened honey.
758
01:04:01,459 --> 01:04:06,604
- Ho, ho, ho.
- It's mind explaining that ho, ho, ho.
759
01:04:07,338 --> 01:04:10,411
Ho, ho, ho, means ho, ho, ho.
760
01:04:11,069 --> 01:04:14,514
I thought so and, I think it's rude
tactless and fathomly suggestive.
761
01:04:15,141 --> 01:04:17,953
You're the last man in the world
I would've expected to be indiscreet.
762
01:04:18,222 --> 01:04:21,315
You begin to get the
picture now, stood up, eh?
763
01:04:23,907 --> 01:04:25,672
Right Gerald...
764
01:04:27,588 --> 01:04:31,901
You get my bad manners.
Excuse me, just a moment.
765
01:04:38,079 --> 01:04:40,063
- Get you dinner?
- Yes.
766
01:04:42,442 --> 01:04:45,792
- Care for other?
- Yes.
767
01:04:47,678 --> 01:04:49,326
Sit down.
768
01:04:55,279 --> 01:04:58,376
- Hello?
- Flame, where have you been?
769
01:04:58,760 --> 01:05:02,017
- What happened to you?
- Why should anything happened to me?
770
01:05:02,203 --> 01:05:04,568
I'm sure I don't know
what you're talking about.
771
01:05:04,848 --> 01:05:07,811
May I remind you that we
had a date for yesterday evening.
772
01:05:07,984 --> 01:05:10,416
We have not, we have a date for tonight?
773
01:05:10,602 --> 01:05:13,857
We had a date for last
night, I remember distinctly.
774
01:05:14,241 --> 01:05:18,201
Well, even if I did make a mistake there's
no reason for you to raise your voice.
775
01:05:19,078 --> 01:05:22,493
Why didn't you call
me I was at home all evening.
776
01:05:23,064 --> 01:05:28,859
- I called you fifty three times.
- Maybe I was in the shower.
777
01:05:30,226 --> 01:05:33,907
The fifty three times I called you were
scattered between 8:10 and 12:15.
778
01:05:34,054 --> 01:05:36,446
Well I hope you don't
think I shower for four hours.
779
01:05:36,606 --> 01:05:39,237
- Of course not.
- But you just said so.
780
01:05:39,610 --> 01:05:41,045
I did not.
781
01:05:42,627 --> 01:05:48,849
I am never in the shower more than five
minutes, maybe you called the wrong number.
782
01:05:49,816 --> 01:05:51,411
That I consider an insult.
783
01:05:53,697 --> 01:05:56,619
Flame, I really didn't
mean to hurt you darling.
784
01:05:59,330 --> 01:06:04,300
Oh, I beg of you,
I implore you to stop crying.
785
01:06:06,094 --> 01:06:10,962
All I did was try to
suggest an explanation you...
786
01:06:12,467 --> 01:06:14,258
I'm also sorry.
787
01:06:15,296 --> 01:06:19,994
Look I, I'll be seeing
you tonight, won't I Flame?
788
01:06:20,565 --> 01:06:22,849
I want you to go with me at the broadcast.
789
01:06:23,628 --> 01:06:26,328
Maybe it's better that
we don't see each other anymore.
790
01:06:27,314 --> 01:06:31,208
Our relationship was
such a, such a beautiful thing.
791
01:06:32,184 --> 01:06:35,546
If one little misunderstanding
can create such a chaos...
792
01:06:36,463 --> 01:06:39,320
Would it be so easy for you
Flame, not to see me anymore.
793
01:06:39,985 --> 01:06:43,494
- It wouldn't be from me I assure you.
- No, it wouldn't be for me either.
794
01:06:45,859 --> 01:06:45,859
It wouldn't be for me I'll show you you.
795
01:06:45,860 --> 01:06:48,823
Be here at 8 o'clock and don't
let's talk about yesterday anymore.
796
01:06:49,673 --> 01:06:54,975
Oh it's awfully sweet of you to
forgive me and please, don't cry anymore.
797
01:06:56,792 --> 01:06:59,232
Good bye.
798
01:07:00,823 --> 01:07:02,870
Five minutes in the shower?
799
01:07:05,528 --> 01:07:07,853
I called for four hours.
800
01:07:11,241 --> 01:07:12,251
Women.
801
01:07:21,966 --> 01:07:25,022
All right, let's forget
the shower for the time being.
802
01:07:27,853 --> 01:07:32,212
One very good
reason not to answer the phone...
803
01:07:33,967 --> 01:07:35,774
is that you don't hear it.
804
01:07:37,967 --> 01:07:40,665
When I ask you, don't you hear the telephone?
805
01:07:41,396 --> 01:07:45,475
For example, when it's out of order.
806
01:07:48,519 --> 01:07:51,828
But the operator said it's
in excellent condition.
807
01:07:54,286 --> 01:07:58,618
No, there's no explanation that I can find.
808
01:08:00,334 --> 01:08:03,524
Except of course that you don't
hear the telephone when you're not at home.
809
01:08:04,056 --> 01:08:05,624
I'll buy that.
810
01:08:43,062 --> 01:08:47,124
- Oh, come in darling, come in.
- I thought perhaps you'd like it.
811
01:08:47,154 --> 01:08:53,022
Thank you so much, how sweet of you.
I like it so much president cut flowers.
812
01:08:53,052 --> 01:08:56,209
They wilt so fast that one has to throw
them away and there's nothing left.
813
01:08:56,239 --> 01:08:58,936
Sit down darling,
I call you a lovely Martini.
814
01:09:00,422 --> 01:09:04,140
Of course, I don't usually drink
before the program, but tonight perhaps.
815
01:09:04,170 --> 01:09:09,512
Oh no? I forgot the program.
Your mind must be crystal clear.
816
01:09:10,066 --> 01:09:13,775
- It's tonight I think I need one.
- You sure.
817
01:09:16,669 --> 01:09:20,733
Flame, I'm a very
confused man, last night I thought...
818
01:09:20,763 --> 01:09:24,537
We promised to each other Beauregard, not
to talk about last night again, didn't we?
819
01:09:24,662 --> 01:09:28,603
And we won't, except that I wanted you to
Know I'm terribly sorry I mixed up our date.
820
01:09:28,633 --> 01:09:30,409
No, it must've been I who caused the mix-up.
821
01:09:30,439 --> 01:09:33,764
- In fact I, I know it was...
- Beauregard...
822
01:09:35,425 --> 01:09:37,713
is it because of me that you're confused?
823
01:09:39,206 --> 01:09:41,275
- Flame?
- No, you mustn't.
824
01:09:41,411 --> 01:09:43,470
- Why mustn't I?
- Because it's so late, I...
825
01:09:43,720 --> 01:09:48,025
and I'll get my things
and be right back, excuse me.
826
01:09:57,389 --> 01:09:59,405
Lovely were Stephen.
827
01:10:09,593 --> 01:10:13,417
Oh Beauregard, if you're worried
about those roses please don't be.
828
01:10:13,897 --> 01:10:17,544
They come a very dear old
friend of mine a Dr. Stephen Blandon.
829
01:10:18,057 --> 01:10:21,884
He must be at least 70 years old.
830
01:10:27,666 --> 01:10:29,619
Very well reserved certainly.
831
01:10:33,433 --> 01:10:37,340
You know Beauregard,
I'm fond of you, very fond.
832
01:10:40,344 --> 01:10:43,361
- Aren't you glad to hear that?
- Very.
833
01:10:49,367 --> 01:10:53,886
I've been looking for perfection in the
same way that you have, now last I found it.
834
01:10:54,112 --> 01:10:56,691
Well of course, perfection
is some what an illusion.
835
01:10:57,156 --> 01:11:00,558
And recently I found
some weaknesses in my structure.
836
01:11:01,196 --> 01:11:02,829
I'd hoped I was the only one.
837
01:11:02,859 --> 01:11:05,979
Oh, I'm here against you,
of course I'm utterly helpless but...
838
01:11:07,321 --> 01:11:11,441
as a matter of fact, once before I...
839
01:11:11,973 --> 01:11:13,781
- I...
- Another woman?
840
01:11:14,033 --> 01:11:17,999
Old part of the country,
Albert Einstein was responsible for it.
841
01:11:18,029 --> 01:11:19,860
- Albert Einstein?
- Yes.
842
01:11:20,670 --> 01:11:24,072
I couldn't master his
space-time continuum theories.
843
01:11:24,756 --> 01:11:27,946
- Drove me to the brink of a breakdown.
- Of course you mastered it.
844
01:11:29,515 --> 01:11:33,090
Not quite my dear, not quite.
845
01:11:40,345 --> 01:11:41,289
You like it?
846
01:11:41,449 --> 01:11:45,568
Ah, the Greeks had a word for all
this but I can't quite remember it.
847
01:11:45,794 --> 01:11:49,874
- Don't Beauregard, don't let's spoil it.
- Let spoil it little, eh?
848
01:11:50,020 --> 01:11:55,668
- Chilly?
- No, no, it's all too late.
849
01:11:56,106 --> 01:11:59,547
What do you mean Flame?
Is there something you want to tell me?
850
01:11:59,973 --> 01:12:01,861
What could I possibly want to tell you?
851
01:12:07,083 --> 01:12:08,678
Flame...
852
01:12:10,048 --> 01:12:12,732
Flame...
853
01:12:27,962 --> 01:12:31,577
- Oh my poor, poor darling.
- There please.
854
01:12:34,646 --> 01:12:37,822
- That was a close one.
- What's the difference?
855
01:12:38,288 --> 01:12:40,595
You're not interested, What I have...
856
01:12:45,126 --> 01:12:47,678
Are you in love with this Stephen?
857
01:12:47,708 --> 01:12:50,695
Love? For normal people.
858
01:12:50,882 --> 01:12:53,447
- Flame, what are you talking about?
- I can't tell you.
859
01:12:53,477 --> 01:12:57,274
Because if I tell you I'd lose
you and I can't afford to lose you.
860
01:12:57,304 --> 01:12:58,922
You won't.
861
01:13:15,665 --> 01:13:16,951
For heaven's sake what's the matter with you.
862
01:13:16,981 --> 01:13:19,236
What should be the matter with me?
Am I cross-eyed or something?
863
01:13:19,399 --> 01:13:23,258
- We shouldn't make me nervous.
- With nothing really just, just, a minute.
864
01:13:23,288 --> 01:13:26,737
Oh, would you please
introduce me to this gentleman?
865
01:13:26,767 --> 01:13:29,182
- Oh yes Mr.Leo Mr.Hogan.
- Beauregard?
866
01:13:29,659 --> 01:13:32,134
Flame, this is not
Happy Hogan it is Mr. Waters.
867
01:13:34,107 --> 01:13:36,667
- How do you do?
- Very well I'm sure.
868
01:13:38,521 --> 01:13:40,282
Will you excuse me please?
869
01:13:44,170 --> 01:13:46,738
This is the pay off this is
the end of Beauregard Bottomley...
870
01:13:46,768 --> 01:13:50,488
tonight you and I will celebrate, I'll
drink champagne out of your typewriter.
871
01:13:54,553 --> 01:13:56,505
I'm so sorry but...
872
01:13:56,851 --> 01:14:02,778
here are six cakes of Milady
soap, the soap that sanctifies, good night.
873
01:14:07,043 --> 01:14:11,868
Oh, you must be Flame and your
relativistic displays is fire in?
874
01:14:11,898 --> 01:14:15,363
Why Beauregard, why you told me
all those nasty things about Hogan?
875
01:14:15,393 --> 01:14:18,446
- I think he's terribly attractive.
- Of course I am.
876
01:14:18,618 --> 01:14:20,906
Used to call me Gorgeous
Hogan when I was wrestling.
877
01:14:20,936 --> 01:14:21,807
You see?
878
01:14:21,837 --> 01:14:24,375
Stick around kid I'll be
back with more of the same.
879
01:14:25,305 --> 01:14:27,059
It's absolutely disgraceful.
880
01:14:27,089 --> 01:14:29,854
But I can't help myself
I tell you, I can help myself.
881
01:14:29,884 --> 01:14:35,366
It's stronger than I, I liked to go, I had a
date with you I knew it but I had to break it.
882
01:14:35,396 --> 01:14:38,534
I couldn't help myself
because Stephen, is just like Hogan.
883
01:14:38,564 --> 01:14:41,412
- What is Hogan?
- Hogan is just like Bill.
884
01:14:41,763 --> 01:14:44,288
And Bill is just like Jim and Jim...
885
01:14:44,989 --> 01:14:47,541
- Quiet, quiet...
- A body in their hands.
886
01:14:47,571 --> 01:14:52,283
This men Beauregard,
grown, handsome, brutal, devil may care.
887
01:14:58,253 --> 01:14:59,581
Beauregard...
888
01:15:02,967 --> 01:15:04,573
Ladies and gentlemen, this is it.
889
01:15:04,739 --> 01:15:06,529
The moment you've all been waiting for.
890
01:15:06,720 --> 01:15:09,410
All over America's
preacher deserted his radio sets...
891
01:15:09,440 --> 01:15:11,706
television consoles and theater screens...
892
01:15:11,736 --> 01:15:14,225
are flashing this
program from coast to coast...
893
01:15:14,385 --> 01:15:18,416
by short wave radio all the world
is waiting for these next few seconds...
894
01:15:18,446 --> 01:15:22,476
when Beauregard Bottomley
will be shooting for the unbelievable sum...
895
01:15:22,506 --> 01:15:26,845
of 20 million dollars or nothing.
896
01:15:34,245 --> 01:15:38,527
Hurry Beauregard. Beauregard
they're waiting for you on the shuttle.
897
01:15:38,557 --> 01:15:42,860
What shuttle? Oh, yes of course, yes.
898
01:15:44,325 --> 01:15:47,275
- Who's that guy? I've seen him before summer.
- Go on.
899
01:16:01,813 --> 01:16:03,753
I can't hear you unless you stop the music.
900
01:16:03,952 --> 01:16:06,756
Stop the mu, you got the wrong program bud.
901
01:16:07,221 --> 01:16:10,942
- Say, you feel all right?
- Oh yes, fine, thank you and you?
902
01:16:11,477 --> 01:16:17,041
Well, here we go, are you ready?
Hey, I said are you ready?
903
01:16:17,071 --> 01:16:20,288
What? Oh yes. I remember, I, I think so.
904
01:16:20,581 --> 01:16:22,030
Here it is.
905
01:16:22,867 --> 01:16:28,316
How does Einstein
regard the espace-time continuum?
906
01:16:36,316 --> 01:16:39,837
Well? We running out of time.
907
01:16:42,003 --> 01:16:43,438
You want to make a stab at it?
908
01:16:44,714 --> 01:16:47,691
You have just five
seconds, come on and try it.
909
01:16:48,475 --> 01:16:53,127
One, two, three, four...
910
01:16:53,419 --> 01:16:57,925
He imagines the continuum
to be cylindrical...
911
01:16:58,895 --> 01:17:03,227
as regards its extension in
time, but spherical...
912
01:17:03,852 --> 01:17:06,854
as regards its extension in space.
913
01:17:07,147 --> 01:17:11,999
So that cross sections
at different instances...
914
01:17:12,702 --> 01:17:19,254
always give a spherical universe of
constant size and so of constant mass.
915
01:17:22,922 --> 01:17:25,992
I'm sorry but that's incorrect.
916
01:17:27,983 --> 01:17:33,525
Oh my, Oh my, is far as I can see.
917
01:17:34,867 --> 01:17:40,077
Tough luck old man, but anyway,
here are six cakes of Mylady soap.
918
01:17:45,713 --> 01:17:48,623
I was almost sure that was the right answer.
919
01:17:59,734 --> 01:18:02,976
Where's Flame? Gone, I suppose.
920
01:18:05,581 --> 01:18:10,006
Beauregard, I'm awfully sorry, really I am.
921
01:18:10,948 --> 01:18:14,828
Listen to me, yelling for you, they want
you out there, do it for me please?
922
01:18:24,822 --> 01:18:28,995
Hello? What? Christa New Jersey?
923
01:18:29,207 --> 01:18:32,968
Who's calling? Oh yes, the
professor Einstein for Happy Hogan.
924
01:18:32,998 --> 01:18:34,788
Have you switched to the stage call?
925
01:18:41,273 --> 01:18:45,047
Einstein, what is he want?
926
01:18:45,207 --> 01:18:49,778
- On call for you Happy?
- Hello, Happy Hogan speaking.
927
01:18:49,925 --> 01:18:53,207
Yes sir, who?
928
01:18:53,765 --> 01:18:57,127
Oh, yes sir, yes. Quiet.
929
01:18:57,659 --> 01:19:01,420
Yes sir, yes sir, we will sir.
930
01:19:02,111 --> 01:19:05,047
Thank you very much professor Einstein.
931
01:19:08,289 --> 01:19:09,392
Is it bad?
932
01:19:09,422 --> 01:19:14,681
Everything that comes from Einstein is
relative, bad for you good for Beauregard.
933
01:19:15,225 --> 01:19:17,338
Your attention
please, ladies and gentlemen...
934
01:19:17,564 --> 01:19:21,285
Professor Einstein has just
called from Princeton to tell us...
935
01:19:21,537 --> 01:19:25,032
that Beauregard Bottomley answer was correct.
936
01:20:12,434 --> 01:20:18,174
Hello? Oh, hello Mr. Waters, who called?
937
01:20:19,742 --> 01:20:21,875
Oh, then you mean Beauregard is...
938
01:20:22,546 --> 01:20:27,030
Oh, I'm so glad. Just a minute,
there's somebody at the door.
939
01:20:31,941 --> 01:20:33,629
Beauregard?
940
01:20:37,031 --> 01:20:40,114
But if, if, if, you only
give me a chance to explain, I...
941
01:21:04,847 --> 01:21:06,800
Beauregard...
942
01:21:06,830 --> 01:21:09,830
don't really mean it, I, I, I...
943
01:21:16,859 --> 01:21:18,152
Somebody is killing her.
944
01:21:19,742 --> 01:21:21,908
She's killing somebody.
945
01:21:22,828 --> 01:21:26,332
Maybe somebody is here killing somebody else.
946
01:21:30,228 --> 01:21:32,588
Miss O'Neil is having Bottomley problem.
947
01:21:34,327 --> 01:21:35,780
Sit down.
948
01:21:35,810 --> 01:21:38,102
- Instead of sitting I lean.
- Certainly.
949
01:21:38,926 --> 01:21:41,903
Now, there is no Stephen, is there?
950
01:21:42,155 --> 01:21:44,108
You bought the roses to yourself.
951
01:21:44,799 --> 01:21:48,533
You're not neurotic,
spellbound, in the grip of brutal men.
952
01:21:50,293 --> 01:21:52,306
- Only one.
- Yes, I wouldn't mind that.
953
01:21:52,572 --> 01:21:53,927
I must congratulate you.
954
01:21:54,140 --> 01:21:57,462
To destroy me with such
beautiful, torture, show real genius.
955
01:21:57,660 --> 01:22:01,650
- Well, it was Waters idea originally.
- Ah, but the execution was exquisite.
956
01:22:02,112 --> 01:22:04,744
Thank you Beauregard I did the worst I could.
957
01:22:04,774 --> 01:22:07,920
Yes, I'm sure you did, I
remember the night you arrived.
958
01:22:08,159 --> 01:22:11,282
- When I laugh in my sleep?
- Yes, it twisted my mind.
959
01:22:11,708 --> 01:22:14,395
- It was effective, wasn't it?
- It was delicious agony.
960
01:22:14,648 --> 01:22:16,911
Were you also pretending when I kept you...
961
01:22:22,421 --> 01:22:26,793
Oh, you're wonderful
Beauregard, I'm ashamed of myself.
962
01:22:27,378 --> 01:22:29,835
Yes, you ought to be, definitely...
963
01:22:30,625 --> 01:22:36,552
but, you know, to be frank,
I should be a little ashamed too.
964
01:22:36,858 --> 01:22:37,556
Why?
965
01:22:37,557 --> 01:22:39,718
Well, because I tricked
you just as you tricked me.
966
01:22:40,538 --> 01:22:44,168
You see, I became a little
suspicious, your timing was too good...
967
01:22:44,198 --> 01:22:46,203
- You're scene is too perfect.
- Is that so?
968
01:22:46,233 --> 01:22:47,786
And your compassion is to bad.
969
01:22:47,999 --> 01:22:50,978
- You mean that I didn't drive you mad?
- Oh yes, yes, of course you did.
970
01:22:51,008 --> 01:22:54,329
I fell in love with you
madly, despise my suspicions, but...
971
01:22:54,702 --> 01:22:57,402
- nevertheless I...
- Beauregard...
972
01:22:58,368 --> 01:23:03,399
do you mean that you purposely let me know
about your weaknesses for Einstein's theory?
973
01:23:03,693 --> 01:23:07,204
It just so happens my dear that I
spend an entire season with Einstein...
974
01:23:07,350 --> 01:23:11,394
working my way through
a maze of logarithms, I love you.
975
01:23:11,424 --> 01:23:15,146
That's just one of the most dishonest
things I ever heard out of my whole life.
976
01:23:15,372 --> 01:23:19,510
I don't know whether
I shall ever forgive you.
977
01:23:21,737 --> 01:23:25,153
Why did this have to
happen to me? I'm a good man.
978
01:23:25,737 --> 01:23:30,150
You know what they called me in college,
Sky Blue Waters, that's right.
979
01:23:32,675 --> 01:23:38,031
No, that's not right, they call me
Dirty Waters and they were right.
980
01:23:38,988 --> 01:23:40,476
Dirty Waters.
981
01:23:41,087 --> 01:23:45,725
- That's why I went into the soap business.
- But he hasn't won yet.
982
01:23:45,898 --> 01:23:47,718
You still got a week to go.
983
01:23:47,748 --> 01:23:52,409
Yes, you're right my dear, you're
absolutely right, one long week of misery.
984
01:23:52,595 --> 01:23:56,754
- Least a little you can do Mr. Waters.
- Yes, yes.
985
01:23:56,784 --> 01:24:00,767
But I can go down in a blaze of glory.
986
01:24:00,966 --> 01:24:06,348
Like Hamlet suck poison cup,
like Mark Anthony fell upon his sword.
987
01:24:06,378 --> 01:24:08,128
I too would seek oblivion.
988
01:24:08,712 --> 01:24:13,164
Next week show will be the last
show, for everything, 40 million dollars.
989
01:24:13,709 --> 01:24:15,410
Book the Hollywood Bowl.
990
01:24:15,570 --> 01:24:19,437
Thousands and thousands
of people, fanfare and pageantry.
991
01:24:19,467 --> 01:24:22,294
The twilight of the Gods, Valhalla...
992
01:24:23,357 --> 01:24:27,053
And then like Romeo and
Juliet, you and I will died.
993
01:24:27,197 --> 01:24:28,634
You're not.
994
01:24:52,288 --> 01:24:55,318
Oh well, come right in.
995
01:24:57,759 --> 01:25:02,238
How is everything? Or perhaps
I should say how will everything be.
996
01:25:02,596 --> 01:25:05,174
Mr. Bottomley, I
know that you're an unbeliever.
997
01:25:05,334 --> 01:25:07,792
Nevertheless, I must
warn you about the future.
998
01:25:08,191 --> 01:25:11,479
Oh, I'd appreciated much more if you
tell me something about Caesar's past.
999
01:25:11,712 --> 01:25:14,916
Please, listen to him Beauregard,
he's really wonderful and.
1000
01:25:14,946 --> 01:25:17,517
And he's so upset about
what he saw on the crystal ball.
1001
01:25:17,547 --> 01:25:21,121
- Indeed I am, to begin with...
- There'll be an un usual turn of events.
1002
01:25:21,151 --> 01:25:23,829
- That is correct and furthermore.
- It'd be trouble in the family?
1003
01:25:23,859 --> 01:25:24,629
That's right...
1004
01:25:24,659 --> 01:25:27,433
But all these difficulties
will be finally overcome.
1005
01:25:27,770 --> 01:25:30,623
No, they will not
Mr. Bottomley, not only that...
1006
01:25:31,033 --> 01:25:33,505
You will not answer the last question.
1007
01:25:36,084 --> 01:25:40,057
My dear medium, your, your
crystal ball needs a new windshield wiper.
1008
01:25:42,583 --> 01:25:44,562
Ever been a bridesmaid Frosty?
1009
01:25:45,679 --> 01:25:48,191
You and Happy Hogan are going to be married.
1010
01:25:49,175 --> 01:25:50,783
I'm so happy.
1011
01:25:52,680 --> 01:25:54,248
Frosty...
1012
01:25:56,440 --> 01:25:58,620
I don't blame you for crying my dear.
1013
01:26:01,839 --> 01:26:03,679
Beauregard, tray to see this my way.
1014
01:26:03,709 --> 01:26:08,005
Gwen, I haven't wrecked my brains and tortured
my mind to drive Hogan off the air...
1015
01:26:08,284 --> 01:26:09,799
only to wind up with him at home.
1016
01:26:10,529 --> 01:26:14,981
- You don't have to live with us Beauregard.
- You have difficulty living with yourself.
1017
01:26:15,858 --> 01:26:18,091
Hogan didn't ask you
to become his wife without...
1018
01:26:18,121 --> 01:26:20,523
being sure he married
into a 40 million dollar family.
1019
01:26:20,948 --> 01:26:22,915
And when did he suggest
the wedding should take place?
1020
01:26:24,416 --> 01:26:28,828
- Before or after the Hollywood Bowl?
- The day after.
1021
01:26:46,234 --> 01:26:48,002
Hello Happy, this is Gw...
1022
01:26:50,793 --> 01:26:54,343
Darling I feel the same way and
is really no sense in our waiting.
1023
01:26:54,529 --> 01:26:57,585
Let's get married right away,
let's go to Las Vegas now, right now.
1024
01:27:06,501 --> 01:27:09,172
All right, we wait if
that's the way you wanted.
1025
01:27:10,913 --> 01:27:13,398
I know you're busy darling is just that I...
1026
01:27:15,085 --> 01:27:17,185
That isn't important really.
1027
01:27:19,722 --> 01:27:21,542
No, we'll wait darling.
1028
01:27:29,581 --> 01:27:35,734
Any questions? Gwen,
there's no reason to be unhappy.
1029
01:27:36,239 --> 01:27:37,727
You've everything you want.
1030
01:27:38,179 --> 01:27:40,876
The only thing I want
in the world is Happy Hogan.
1031
01:27:40,906 --> 01:27:45,222
I know, but you will discover
many new and beautiful things.
1032
01:27:46,724 --> 01:27:48,849
You'll be able to travel.
1033
01:27:51,042 --> 01:27:54,284
You'll be able to travel
all over the world if you wish.
1034
01:27:56,038 --> 01:28:00,344
And when you come back, I
know you're going to be very happy...
1035
01:28:01,712 --> 01:28:03,932
living with flame and me.
1036
01:28:05,050 --> 01:28:06,856
- Flame?
- Yes,
1037
01:28:06,886 --> 01:28:11,573
Gwen, she has promised to
be Mrs. Beauregard Bottomley.
1038
01:28:11,828 --> 01:28:15,721
- Are you out of your mind?
- She's explained everything.
1039
01:28:16,159 --> 01:28:19,415
And you fell for that like a nin-com-poop.
1040
01:28:19,777 --> 01:28:23,085
That female Benedict Arnold.
1041
01:28:23,538 --> 01:28:26,927
I resent that, I resent
you calling me a nin-com-poop.
1042
01:28:27,960 --> 01:28:33,691
When did she suggest that the wedding
take place, before or after the ball?
1043
01:28:44,226 --> 01:28:48,771
Hello Darling, hello.
Yes of course, I love you.
1044
01:28:49,270 --> 01:28:53,330
So much so, that I will be at your
house in approximately 45 minutes.
1045
01:28:53,649 --> 01:28:55,152
We will then motor to Las Vegas...
1046
01:28:55,311 --> 01:29:00,348
we will arrive at dawn and at the time we'd
had breakfast we will be husband and wife.
1047
01:29:07,989 --> 01:29:14,356
Trousseau, fittings, wedding gown.
1048
01:29:26,836 --> 01:29:29,719
Oh yes, yes, yes, I see.
1049
01:29:29,932 --> 01:29:36,889
Oh, then I guess we just,
just have to wait, goodbye dear.
1050
01:31:26,490 --> 01:31:28,842
- Step aside.
- What you people doing?
1051
01:31:30,934 --> 01:31:34,057
- This way Mr. Bottomley.
- Thank you.
1052
01:31:35,665 --> 01:31:38,190
- How do you do?
- In your case quite well.
1053
01:31:38,801 --> 01:31:41,443
You've been following me
around fora very long time.
1054
01:31:41,473 --> 01:31:44,595
Quiet abruptly
Mr. Bottomley, belong to us now.
1055
01:31:44,808 --> 01:31:48,210
I belong, would you mind
telling me who you people are?
1056
01:31:48,240 --> 01:31:51,706
Department of Internal
Revenue, you know, income tax.
1057
01:31:51,736 --> 01:31:56,296
- Oh yes, yes.
- We thought you were gangsters.
1058
01:31:59,300 --> 01:32:00,748
How much of him belongs to you?
1059
01:32:00,778 --> 01:32:03,392
Let's say that Mr.
Bottomley is in a battleship class.
1060
01:32:03,658 --> 01:32:04,412
Oh?
1061
01:32:04,442 --> 01:32:06,476
Let us know when you
pick up the money, won't you?
1062
01:32:06,506 --> 01:32:09,373
- Oh, why not stay and pick it up for me?
- We practically will.
1063
01:32:09,403 --> 01:32:12,749
- Well, good luck.
- Good luck to us too.
1064
01:32:13,798 --> 01:32:16,119
Means a awful lot to you
whether I win or lose doesn't you?
1065
01:32:16,373 --> 01:32:20,001
Of course darling, think how
40 million will look in our piggy bank.
1066
01:32:20,031 --> 01:32:21,622
Yes, indeed look well.
1067
01:32:34,114 --> 01:32:38,964
Ladies and gentlemen, it is my pleasure at
this time, to present a man you all know...
1068
01:32:39,190 --> 01:32:41,914
you all love and you all laugh with...
1069
01:32:42,472 --> 01:32:45,994
I mean none other than Happy Hogan.
1070
01:32:58,924 --> 01:33:01,888
Thank you, thank you and
good evening ladies and gentlemen.
1071
01:33:02,196 --> 01:33:05,066
This historic event is about to begin.
1072
01:33:05,545 --> 01:33:08,694
It looks like closing
night for Masquerade for Money.
1073
01:33:09,239 --> 01:33:13,677
I would sincerely like to know who my
next sponsor is going to be, if any.
1074
01:33:15,737 --> 01:33:19,046
However, I have a sponsor
at least for the next half hour...
1075
01:33:19,365 --> 01:33:21,398
and I'd like to present him to you now.
1076
01:33:21,704 --> 01:33:25,199
The captain of our
stricken bark a self-made man...
1077
01:33:25,478 --> 01:33:28,827
a man who arrived in
Los Angeles as a barefoot boy...
1078
01:33:28,987 --> 01:33:34,169
has a good chance of leaving
tomorrow morning as a barefoot man.
1079
01:33:34,502 --> 01:33:36,229
Burnbridge Waters.
1080
01:33:48,189 --> 01:33:51,526
Let the best man loose.
1081
01:34:10,462 --> 01:34:13,983
Here he is, the man of
the hour, the man of the year...
1082
01:34:14,302 --> 01:34:19,711
the man of the century, the man who
knows everything, super brain Bottomley.
1083
01:34:32,111 --> 01:34:37,147
Beauregard, in one moment you will be
asked a question the answer to which...
1084
01:34:37,479 --> 01:34:41,998
will determine whether you're
worth 40 million dollars or nothing.
1085
01:34:45,745 --> 01:34:48,695
Of course you can still take
your 20 million dollars and go home.
1086
01:34:48,921 --> 01:34:51,779
- No, thank you.
- Are you ready?
1087
01:34:52,071 --> 01:34:53,772
Quite ready.
1088
01:34:58,875 --> 01:35:04,523
Do you have your
wallet with you? May I have it?
1089
01:35:10,252 --> 01:35:12,657
Here is your question.
1090
01:35:12,841 --> 01:35:16,735
Beauregard Bottomley, what is
your social security number?
1091
01:35:19,911 --> 01:35:23,166
Of course, nothing could be simpler.
1092
01:35:23,711 --> 01:35:29,132
My social security number is 452 - 1...
1093
01:35:33,903 --> 01:35:37,863
no wait a moment, that's
5-4-2, no no 2 - 4 - 5.
1094
01:35:38,089 --> 01:35:42,713
That's right 245-17...
1095
01:35:43,019 --> 01:35:50,988
- 6012.
- That is absolutely wrong.
1096
01:36:06,951 --> 01:36:10,066
Well, it's just very right.
1097
01:36:12,662 --> 01:36:19,151
But I was right to. Oh, you're horrible.
An hour ago you lost 40 million dollars.
1098
01:36:19,469 --> 01:36:21,194
Flame certainly left you in a hurry.
1099
01:36:21,224 --> 01:36:24,828
I consider one of the greatest
virtues to take. Defeat with dignity.
1100
01:36:28,786 --> 01:36:31,446
- Good evening, good evening.
- What's this?
1101
01:36:31,738 --> 01:36:33,525
- Champagne.
- Champagne is a cider.
1102
01:36:33,555 --> 01:36:35,964
The beginning of a life long supply.
1103
01:36:39,329 --> 01:36:42,622
Good heavens, where you've been?
1104
01:36:42,652 --> 01:36:46,462
- Champagne.
- Oh you lovely, lovely bird.
1105
01:36:46,834 --> 01:36:48,881
We were roommates in college together.
1106
01:36:48,911 --> 01:36:51,698
So you're the one that
taught him all these expressions.
1107
01:36:54,342 --> 01:36:56,416
- Happy...
- Come on darling.
1108
01:36:56,735 --> 01:36:58,352
Aren't you going to wish us good luck?
1109
01:36:58,382 --> 01:37:01,585
Well, you're obnoxious but not
quite as obnoxious I thought you were.
1110
01:37:05,785 --> 01:37:09,732
- Hello.
- Flame...
1111
01:37:11,765 --> 01:37:13,591
Darling, aren't you packed and ready.
1112
01:37:13,592 --> 01:37:16,088
If you don't hurry we'll
never have breakfast in Las Vegas.
1113
01:37:16,118 --> 01:37:18,301
You don't know how ready I am.
1114
01:37:18,599 --> 01:37:20,105
Oh, goodbye.
1115
01:37:22,522 --> 01:37:26,071
- Let's get loaded.
- Don't worry, we will.
1116
01:37:28,701 --> 01:37:31,288
- Oh, yours?
- Our.
1117
01:37:32,130 --> 01:37:36,112
No, oh Beauregard, it's beautiful.
1118
01:37:37,602 --> 01:37:40,283
- Where it come from?
- Wedding gift.
1119
01:37:40,846 --> 01:37:43,590
From a very generous Burnbridge Waters.
1120
01:37:43,923 --> 01:37:49,651
Generous? Burnbridge Waters?
Those two don't write things together.
1121
01:37:54,115 --> 01:37:56,295
You know I don't
understand any of this at all.
1122
01:37:56,325 --> 01:38:01,477
Yes, unbelievable is it? And is not all,
I have my own radio-program a bit of stock...
1123
01:38:01,703 --> 01:38:04,095
and a few other small considerations.
1124
01:38:04,507 --> 01:38:07,152
Did you make a deal with Dirtywater?
1125
01:38:07,710 --> 01:38:11,391
Did you agree to answer the
last question wrong on purpose?
1126
01:38:12,613 --> 01:38:15,883
Oh darling, you did it all
because of me, didn't you?
1127
01:38:16,362 --> 01:38:18,661
You want to find out if I really loved you?
1128
01:38:18,691 --> 01:38:21,452
Oh you, gorgeous, Beau.
1129
01:38:21,482 --> 01:38:23,698
A gorgeous yes, but
I wasn't such a fool after all.
1130
01:38:23,850 --> 01:38:27,491
I must confess I didn't
know my social security number.
1131
01:38:28,177 --> 01:38:31,168
May I kiss you properly
darling, I promise not broke in.
1132
01:38:31,198 --> 01:38:37,089
Well that's highly possible my
sweet but you can go ahead and try.
1133
01:38:38,585 --> 01:38:41,692
- What is this?
- Books.
1134
01:38:41,722 --> 01:38:43,153
What for?
1135
01:38:43,431 --> 01:38:46,766
I always read myself
to sleep darling, remember?
1136
01:38:48,318 --> 01:38:48,319
Myself to sleep darling you remember103067
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