All language subtitles for Bobbi.Jene.2017.WEBRip.x264-ION10.www.RapidMovieZ.com

Don't worry about falling.
Yeah?

Just let yourself move
and feel how...

...the movement just kind of
carries you around.

Keep going.

I love being in the company.

I love dancing for you.

I just feel it's time for me
to go make my own work.

So it's painful,
but it's probably also...

...what you need.

How old will you be in November?

- How old do you think I'll be?
- 30?

Is that a problem for you? No.

Shouldn't be.

Can you believe I'll be 30?
You met me when I was 21.

Joining me now is the talented
and lovely Bobbi Jene Smith,

whom grew up in Iowa,
attended the Juilliard School
for Performing Arts,

and in 2005 moved to Israel
to dance in the world-famous
Batsheva Dance Company.

Now ten years later, she is here

with the upsetting news
that she is leaving our country
for good.

- Say it isn't so.
- Sad, but true.

Tell me about
how you got here.

Because from Iowa to Tel Aviv
is not an obvious route.

No, I'd never left the country.
I didn't have a passport even.

But it was my dream to dance for
Batsheva, but I was at school
at Juilliard.

Ohad came to visit...
- Ohad Naharin, the person
behind Batsheva.

And he saw you dance there.
You worked with him?

Yeah, I asked to talk to him

to say thank you so much
for this experience,

and I said,
"I don't know where to start."

He's like, "I'll start for you.
You want to dance for me?"

I said, "Yes, I do."
"Move to Israel!"

- So you did?
- Yeah, I left school early.

Yeah, I grew up here.
Everything changed.

I learned a lot.
- Yeah.

Ohad and I were lovers,
but that ended.

I learned from him about...

Effort and pleasure,

and pain and pleasure,
and how it's just a switch.

It's the same thing.

Hi, Mom. It's Bobbi.

I'm good.

I just wanted to tell you guys
that I made up my mind.

I'm gonna move
back to the States.

No, not until the
end of the year.
I have to finish the season.

Are you in church?

Yeah, tell dad I say hi.
I love you.

Bobbi, you have to.

I don't want to live the
rest of my life in Israel.

- Why?
- It doesn't feel
like home here.

But it will be a big loss
for the company if you leave.

This is the time
that I have
to go check it out.

What's my life like
without Batsheva?

We define ourselves so much
by the place, and...

Even though we're celebrated
as individuals here,
it's still...

No, I completely
understand you, Bobbi.

It's important for you. It's not
Bobbi, the dancer in Batsheva.

It's becoming Bobbi Smith,
the person, the dancer,
the creator, the choreographer.

You need to check it out.

But good luck.

You're awful.

You'll have some babies...

First of all, I think from here,
we need a wave.

- Nice, yeah.
- Okay.

And then into the...

Yeah, so... and then it stops.

Better. Almost like you want to
put it right underneath it.

And then it starts to tip.

Yeah. Yeah, I think so.

No, no, be serious.

The young kid.

I'll be forty when he's thirty.

And he's just, like...

He's just...

I don't need to go there.
I need to do what I need to do.

Which is what? I need to dance.
I need to work hard. That's it.

Can we take it?

This is still the same,
everything the same, and stop.
Wait, wait...

And then go, Bobbi.
Exactly, and go. Okay, yeah?

Look at the poor chair.
It's stuck in the wave.

- It's coming to us.
- It's coming.

I really want him to stand up.

You saved him.

Come on,
we need to feed you cauliflower.

- Bye, sweetie. Love you.
- Love you too.

I told you that thing
my mom once said,
when we were riding in the car?

And there was a big bump
and we went, "Oh!"

And she was like, "Wow."

I go, "Mom, what, are you okay?"
She's like, "That's what
making love feels like."

- No?
Your father was in the car?
- No.

- Really?
- Yeah.

- Just you and Jason?
- I don't think
my brother was there.

They asked...

"How is it to have
a thirty-year-old girlfriend?"

My grandma asked me,

"But why thirty?
Why? Why?"

And I was like,
"Because love has no age."

She was like, "Just be careful."

Are you being careful?

Women only want kids
and a wedding.

You know that's all
girls think of.

I was like, "Don't worry,
Grandma, don't worry."

Bobbi, what are you doing?
I've got to carry something.

Feel how the soft,
grabbing people,
now introduce more juice..

...into what you're doing.

Try to get the heel
away from you.

Close to you.

Turn in.

Turn out.

I found this thing I wrote
the first time
I came to see you.

And you were like,
"You'll stay ten years."

I wish I wasn't right.

- Me too.
- I wish I was wrong.

You'll stay connected
with "gaga" you will stay
connected to my work,

but you will not be around.

It's also something that you...

That's one of the changes
you want to do.
Change things.

- You actually want to get away from me.
- - It's not you.

It's not getting away from you.

You know that. Don't you?

Actually, I don't know exactly.
I don't know.

I know that you're doing
something you want and need,
and I totally support it.

It's not about me,
it's about you.

If it was about me,
I would keep you here.

But since it's not about me...

My concerns are for you
because you're making
a huge decision.

But you'll be fine too.

Are you saying goodbye to Or?

- We're going to try
to stay together.
- Really?

How?
Is Or going to San Francisco?

- No.
- Wow.

Long distance.

- Really?
- Uh huh.

♪ We might as well
be lovers on the sun ♪

This is nice.

I love lime green.
It's like...
- It's disgusting.

Jene, you're doing it
very, very fast.

This is the kitchen.
I like the kitchen.

I love the kitchen.
I love blue.

When you are alone at home,
I won't be there for you.

Don't say that.
I'll be there for you.

- No, you won't.
- Yes, I will.

But what's a year if we know
we want to be together?

I know. I didn't say we won't
be together, but... it's hard.

Of course.
But it can also be amazing.

No?
- No.

Maybe you'll come to the States.

- To do what?
- Anything you want.

- I need to make money somehow.
- I'll pay for everything.

- You can do
a lot of things there.
- What?

You can dance for Beyoncé.

- I don't want to dance
for Beyoncé.
- A little bit?

No. She has her dancers.

We can make our art together.

But we are very different.

How?

You said maybe you wanted
to go to acting school.

Jene, for me to go
to the States now

would be like
when you were 21 coming here.

It's relocating. It's hard.

It's really hard.

It's kind of the same as...
It's even harder for me
to relocate now.

- To go back.
- It's not the same...

When I was 21
I had nothing to lose.

I had no perspective.

I went and I didn't even think,
"Oh, what's the rent?"

Right now,
where I am in my life...

If you tell me, "Or, leave
everything, come tomorrow
to the States." I can't.

- Why?
- 'Cause I can't.

I don't feel like
I'm ready to leave Israel.

What would make you
feel ready?

I don't know.
Maybe grow up a bit.

Leaving a place
makes you grow up much faster.

Maybe I don't want
to grow up faster.

And maybe it's not a part of it.

And I know Israel
is my home for life.

I know. I told you this before.
I'm very connected
to this place.

And maybe I don't know
other places, because I'm young.
I love Israel.

I know that I want my family-

my future family,
my kids, you...

I want Israel
to be a part of their life.

Yeah, it's important for me.

I'll start in San Francisco
and then we'll see.

I'm teaching at Stanford
for one semester.

And I have free studio space.
- To create?

And be close to my family.

Nice after all these years
of being so far away from them.

I don't think
it will ever feel right.

I don't know.

And what about Or?

You will keep
having a relationship?

Are you okay, Bobbi?

It's like... no time left.

Thirty minutes.

Should we have a little sip?

No, but let's have a little sip.

- To another last one.
- Yes.

Or says it's stupid to cry
on your last show.

- Oh well.
- I said, "You wait and see."

Excited?
No? Yes you are.

I don't feel
as sad as I thought.

Champagne for Bobbi.

- Champagne!
- Do you have
your champagne glass?

- Jene, can I come in?
- Yeah.

Hi.

- Chuchu can't cry
when I'm here.
- It's true.

You can't do that.

It was an honor
to be on stage with you.

- It was an honor
to dance with you.
- An honor to dance with you.

Cheers to dreams.

To dreams.

No.

So then, this leg is...

Go back. Yeah.

So it's almost like
you go so much
that it turns you, and then...

And your arms
then take you back.

You just have to hope
for the best.

Usually it's a 70% chance.

30% I hit my head really hard
on the floor, 70% I don't.

But you're not going to die.

Good.

Now go up.
That's amazing.

That's what's best,
when you go up
and I sink into you this way.

I'll give you all my weight
and if you squeeze me...

- Is it better?
- It's totally fine.

I know to set up my own thing,

to be able to make my own work
in the way that I want to,

it's going to take years.

I'm really dying to do
that first show,
or to get something...

- I need to see the work,
to know...
- Yeah.

You have to make friends
with all the presenters
and all the festivals.

And you should have an agent
and you should have a producer.

It's network and it's time.
- Right.

- Do you have an APAP showcase?
- No, I don't have anything.

Do you feel connected
to the dance community here?

- I don't think anyone
knows I'm even here.
- Right.

Mom, I think this picture
is very creepy.

- Why?
- I don't know.

He's with you
in every step of your life.

Why do you think it's creepy?

There are soccer players too.
Not a dancer though.

Maybe we should write them.

He'd be there helping you
stand up tall
and twirl you around.

Most people just relate
to ballerinas, right?

But what if it was
contemporary dance?

- His first hoodie.
- You want to be close?

- Mom... Mom!
- My gosh!

You don't take bones
from her.

- You got him?
- I don't know.

Here.

The neck and the butt.

I thought I did that.

You're so delicate with him.

I think he likes your hair.

Back in North Carolina
they thought I had
a bad eating disorder.

I was drinking so much Diet Coke
that I had to pee all the time.

I had already gone
to the bathroom twice.

And you didn't want them
to think you had to throw up?

I didn't want to go a third time
and I had to pee so bad.

And it was the theatre seating.

And then I finally
just sat there

and I peed into the seat
as someone was dancing on stage.

I couldn't...
- What were you wearing?

I was wearing black
so you couldn't tell
that I got wet.

A battle. A little battle
that eating problem.

- It's a waste of food.
- I just don't get the need
to not eat.

So when you didn't want to eat
it was more or less about...

just being thin to dance?
- No.

- What was it?
- It's a long story.

Can we talk about it?

Hi, David.

It's going slowly.

I'm trying to work
on my own stuff.

Yeah. Trying to get stuff
together for Study on Effort.

Talk to people.
Try to make something happen.

It looks like they're
going to present us
in The Israeli Museum.

Yeah, I'm excited.

Maybe I'll be able to do a run
through for you later this week.

Yeah. We can talk about what
the space should look like,
or different ideas.

Uh huh.

- You're beautiful.
- What? Shut up.

- You're so beautiful.
- Shut up. You're beautiful.

- Baby, what time is it
at your place?
- 11:41.

- In the morning?
- Yeah.

Whoa. You never know
the time difference, do you?

- I will never get it.
- You can just look
on your world clock thing.

Yeah, but it's too much...
Like... Too many things to get.

Okay.

- But...
- What else?

- Nothing.
- Did you carve anything?

Yeah,
the miniature house.

Show me!
So cute!
You made a little chimney.

- How you call this?
- A fireplace.

Yeah, look, with the wood.

See?
- Or, it's really beautiful.

- Shit, I'm running out of battery.
- - I love you.

I love you.

Show me Ze'ev.
Show me Ze'ev.

Hey, I want to see...

My friends.
Bye.

Bye.

It's the same
for dancers and actors
where they say:

"She should be flirty and sexy
with the boys

and not get too angry
because then that's a bitch."

That's actress talk for...

- Don't get angry?
As a girl?
- Yeah.

Don't over-talk it,
don't get angry and make sure
you stay sexy all the time.

I saw Batsheva
at Lincoln Center.

I went to a company ran by
a straight man who loves women.

I lucked out.
Most dance companies
aren't like that.

And he wanted strong,
powerful women.

He wanted thighs
and ass and boobs.

Echoes of flesh moving.

And juice.
He wants you to drip.

To be a female dancer,
you're never asked to do that.
You are asked to like...

So the movement language
that we train in
is called "gaga", and...

People ask...

They'll take their first "gaga"
class and be like
it feels like psychology.

That it feels really heady.
Really?

My first "gaga" class
I was puking.
I had to leave class to puke.

Or come, or...
Something had to come out of me.

And I remember going up
to the guy who created it,
Ohad, and said,

"Is this like a mindfuck?

Are you trying to fuck me
in my mind?"

What the hell is happening?
I'm 21.
What are you doing to me?"

He's like,
"No, no... It's physical,
it'll take care of the rest."

I never had to go
to a psychologist
to fix my eating disorder.

You enjoy pleasure.
You enjoy effort.
Give your body pleasure.

Why are you telling me this now?
You know how much
money I've spent...

And you've just been
dancing this shit out...?

How many movies I've had to make
to try to figure my shit out.

It's funny, in the first one,
I sort of
thought of vacation photos.

Not everybody wants to go
on the ride with you...
You know what I mean?

You're not showing us the photo
like you're on it.

If you're afraid of it turning
into vacation photos

that people
are eye rolling about...

You probably don't have
to be so concerned,
because it's so... in the room.

I think it works.
Breaking the convention in terms
of language is a little wonky.

And also you've created
a relationship to an effort.

"This is the effort of this,
but I'm gonna stand behind it"

which you haven't done
with anything else.

I wanted to ask you:
Naked or not?

Oh, I don't know.

Have you done it yet naked? No?

You know, you will see the boobs
bouncing and you will see...

You will see...
Things that I don't
want to be seen.

Oh, I came so hard.

This is like a dream come true.
Look at all this inspiration.

You just have sand?
Where is it?

- The white house.
- You just told us
the blue house.

The blue building
across the street.

Oh, they meant that blue one?
Okay.

Mom, you know
what I do on the sandbag, right?

And you're helping me buy it.
You're like, "Where's the sand?"

Oh, my God.
This is the best one yet.
- Oh, my God, it's heavy.

- That's a lot of weight.
- How many pounds is that?

50 pounds.

- Bobbi, let me do it.
- It's for when I'm a mom.

Don't go.

How is it that you chose
to do this on a sandbag?
How'd that come about?

You know, Mom?

Sometimes you need
to find pleasure
with what weighs you down.

- But how did you find that one?
- Isn't it the most obvious?

In your world maybe.
It still worries me...

Right.
Why does it worry you?

You really want to know
why it worries me?
Because...

- I'll go to hell?
- No, it's got nothing
to do with hell.

Because Jesus was naked a lot.

No, it's got nothing
to do with that.

There are bigger things
than that.

No. It's go to do with the
whole-- For you, I was
worried about the mental thing.

Because I know...

Exposing oneself can be
very mentally difficult.

And I was worried about that
for you.

That you know, I mean, just...
- Right.

But you know what else can be
even more difficult?

Withholding and underexposing,
or hiding.

I have to listen to the piece,
and for me the piece
comes before...

What does the piece need?

That's beautiful
and I respect that.
I came from a background that...

It wasn't important
what I'd learn
as much as what...

Everyone else would think.

That was my first reaction.
What about your cousins
who love you as a dancer

but can't watch you
because you're naked?
You know what I mean?

I admire you for that.
I'm not sure I could watch
the whole thing...

That's okay. I won't ever let
you watch the whole thing.

You haven't seen my work
in 13 years.

You've seen videos
and stuff, but...
- Not in person, no.

That's why...

One of my favorites
was when you
and Austin did Blue Room.

- I wasn't even in it.
- A little bit, weren't you?

- Very small.
- But you choreographed it.

- Yeah, but on other people.
- It was beautiful.

So, deary, I can't believe
you're going to Israel
in two weeks.

Do you have your ticket?
- Mm-hmm.

We've missed you so much.

How was your flight?
- So long.
I didn't sleep at all.

Right when I was coming out,
I think Or might-

It's only one o'clock,
he might make it.

You did make it.
- Of course, I made it.

Oh, you're real.

Yes, all over, Bobbi.
All over.

On the Facebook of Jerusalem,
your photo.
You do this.

It's a very famous newspaper
in Israel.

- It's very intellectual.
- Everything about culture.

It's just complicated
because the museum
has to see the piece before...

They didn't see it?

They didn't know
if they should talk
about the pleasure part.

And I said, "I don't feel like
you need to tell them."

Here in Jerusalem
they're not open
like in Tel Aviv.

- I know.
- It's very...

We have to make them feel okay
with what they're presenting.

Are you ready?

It was difficult.

But it's moving
and it's touching,
and you are... great.

Thank you.
The end will be when I leave.

But I know you have to go.
Matan waved when
it was six o'clock.

- It had no ending.
- It's okay.

Rest and relax.

So it started a year
ago, it was a six minute piece,
and...?

- Then it became an hour.
- It's one hour?

I started thinking
about this movement.
Oh wow.

It's lifting something up.
If I keep doing it,
it's going to start...

It's going to start to reverse.

And then I started
to play with how
one movement can say...

The movement doesn't change
but the meaning,
the content of it

completely flips.

It's gradual, right?

You start it,
and then it gets harder...

And then what happens?

I want to get
to that place where...

Where...?

Uh, I have no strength
to hide anything.

I am moved.

- Thank you. Huge experience.
- Thank you.

- I kept hearing
my heart beating.
- Mine too.

Thank you so much,
it was very moving.
Amazing.

You have a magic quality
to transform.

It's a nuance
that not every performer
can understand.

It's exceptional.
You're exceptional.

- Was it okay?
- It was perfect.

- It was a bit fast.
- Jene, it was perfect.

- Ten minutes fast.
- No, no, no. Good. Amazing.

Everything was just...
For me, it worked.

You kill me. Amazing.

What did Ohad say?

He didn't say much.
He asked me
when I'm leaving town...

He said it was powerful...

...and if he'd seen it
when he was younger
it would've changed his life.

Wow.

- Cheers, Bobbi.
- Thanks for being
there tonight.

Amazing.

You love velvet.

This is small,
but today I saw her body.

Her perfect body. Wow.
- It will be a statue.

- It was magical.
- I mean,
my parents couldn't watch.

It has to do with, you know...

Old stuff and shame and...
You know?

- Okay, no problem.
- Yeah.

They're very...

L'chaim!

Come on. Talk to me.

I don't even know...

It's just a lot.

What was too much?

No, I'm...

No words.

No, it's just, keep working.

There's--
It doesn't have a
payoff like acting

or even film has that...

...performing arts don't have
that, or music.

You can have one song,
and you can get royalties.

The equivalent
in the dance world
is you can make one great solo

and maybe some people
will see it.

That's it.

Maybe that's the problem:
I never thought of the future.
Ever.

- Mom, these clothes
are amazing.
- Isn't that crazy?

- Where did you get those?
- I kept them.

- Really?
- Yeah.

- "I Love Baseball...",
everything.
- I know.

You've always said you
probably wouldn't have kids...

...for a long time,
so it's like, well.

I used to say I'll adopt,
or be a foster parent...

Yeah...

It's very cute.

- I've never seen Jason
so happy.
- He is happy.

Kids make a person happy.
It's like the best gift
in the world.

Now I have to work
on finding you a soulmate,
Bobbi.

Shut up!

He's not going to be
a run-of-the-mill guy,
I don't think.

What does that mean, Lyle?
A run-of-the-mill guy?

Well, some guy that just works
at a factory, or...

If he is then that's okay.
It's okay.

But he's probably
going to be a little eccentric.

Who are you looking for, Bobbi?
What kind of guy
are you looking for?

Mom, I found a pretty great guy.

The last hour
is like a whole month.

Where have you been?
Where have you been?

"Yet my heart throbs
to know one thing."

- Again?
- "Yet my heart throbs
to know one thing."

Yet my heart throb...
throbs to know hard thing.

"To know one thing."

- "Tell me:"
- "Tell me:"

"If your art can tell you such-

"If your art can tell you such-

- shall Banquo's issue-
- shall Banquo's issue-

- ever reign in this kingdom?"
- ever reign in this kingdom?"

It's very sexy on you.
It's great, Or.

- You can totally do that.
- Yeah, I'll do Macbeth great.

- Isn't it too arsy?
- No, you look so beautiful.

I feel a bit arsy,
like I'm going to a wedding.

No, you look very sexy.

- You put lotion on your ass?
- I put lotion all over my body.

That's disgusting.
They should do lotion
with taste in it, like condoms.

I'll tell them.

I feel like he is so much
a man for me all the time.

He takes care of so many things.
I can take care of this one,
you know?

And he's even said that...

He already knows
he wants to spend
the rest of his life with me.

So why do we need
to get married?

So I know
that it's more important to me.

Why would he need
to plan some proposal

when it's not so important
to him?

I'll take him out to dinner...

and then I'll propose.

I think he will be fine
with that.

We can't keep going
long distance like this,
without some sort of plan.

I don't feel...

that it's good for us.
It's not good for me.

So sad.

They're trying.

She just had to lean on her side
against his chest.

Orsimus!

- How was it?
- It was great.

Look at you.
You're so pretty.

It was great.
It was...

Give me so many other tools
and blah, blah, bla...

Acting or even dancing
and then combining the two.

I'm like, "Yeah, I know this."
You know?

He was sweet.
He was very, very sweet. But...

I just need to send this to...

There is a semester
that starts in September
and one starts in January.

I was almost running here.
I missed you.

A love attack.

I love you. I love you.

I love you.

You have a message.

I wonder how it is to live here.
If it's as hard
like everybody says.

I think if...

If you were here I wouldn't
think it's hard at all.

It might be a mistake to leave.

- Would it be
a mistake to leave?
- It might be. I'm thinking.

- Why would it be a mistake?
- Um...

Because I might
have a lot to give,
to get and to learn.

- From Ohad?
- Of course, from Ohad.

From the place,
from the people
that surround me.

The dancers,
the greatest talent.

But Chuchu,
we are not in the same place.

You know?

Maybe we think similarly,
but we are not
in the same place.

You have connections here,
you have friends here
that can help you.

You have the mind,
artistically...

- But I don't have my love here.
- Yes, that's the...

Another glass of wine?
Uh, no thank you.

Drink mine.

And for me everything else
feels a bit...

What am I doing that for,
if you're not here?

You're doing it for your future,
which is...

But if that
could destroy our future,
what good is that future then?

If we decide
it won't destroy it,
it won't destroy it.

Or is not going to move
to New York in September.

So that means he's going
to be in Batsheva
for one more year.

I think I probably felt it.
I just..

For some reason I thought the
application was due...

I thought he had more time.
I hadn't looked when it was due.

I said,
"But you had since February,

since the last time
you came to New York."

Then he admitted,

"I guess after I came back
from New York, I wasn't sure."

It snuck up on both of us.
I think we were
just dreaming too much.

We're not very good with all
the reality stuff.

You kill me.

Listen!

You're going
to be Ohad Naharin.
- Shut up!

I'm going to e-mail him now.
I'm not kidding.
I'm not kidding.

Listen.
No one does it to me, you know?

Maybe Ohad there, like,
20 years ago.

- Thank you.
- No, I'm not kidding.

I'm not feeling well.

- Are you okay?
You want some water?
- Maybe.

Oh, my fucking God.
I can't move.

- Thanks for coming guys.
- Of course.

- So amazing. How are you?
- I'm okay.

Shit, man.
Bobbi, you're the shit.

I don't know how you gained
as many experience even
to do this at your age.

- But I'm 32 now.
- But even...

You need to go through
a lot with relationships

to understand
the subtle efforts
you have to put in.

Thank you.

You were amazing.

- It was just really moving.
- Why?

Well, for me at that moment
it was trying hard to resolve...

It's kind of like,
let out your feelings.
Maybe that's it.

You know, how much work it is,
and then you-
so then it comes out.

It just comes out.
- Yeah.