All language subtitles for Girls.S06E04.HDTV.x264-SVA

Is green tea all right
for you, Hillary?

Mm-hmm. Thank you.

Um, so, when I finally got to New York

and I knew that I wanted
to support myself

on my own so I could write, well, I
thought that was gonna mean, you know,

serving cheesecake in Junior's
or temping in the Bronx.

And it turned out

it meant part-time sex work in an
oddly clinical townhouse in midtown.

And you know something?

That was the happiest I've ever been.

But I don't understand because you came
to New York because you wanted to write,

so I don't really get, like, how,
like, servicing other people

would give you what you wanted.

Yes, but that's the mistake
we all make, isn't it?

Believing that being a writer
means being, you know,

totally and utterly uninterrupted.

It means silence.

It means, you know, a room of one's own.

No, no, no. See, that's bullshit.

Bullshit. That's what we
perceive a male writer to have.

You know?

And that can lead to,
ugh, horrible solipsism

and disconnection from humanity.

I'm not naming names.

Never naming names.

Martin fucking Amis,

Woody Allen, Saul Bellow.

If you give the men the space
that they say they need,

then their work suffers, they suffer.

I guess that surprises me
because I've always thought

that I was working towards this moment

when everything else would fall away

and I would just be,
like, you know, alone

and able to just indulge my thoughts.

No, but that's bullshit.

I mean, can you even picture that?

Can you picture that?

I am not a mother,

and there's a reason for that.

Because childlessness
is the natural state

of the female author, okay?

Write that down. Get
used to it, you know?

And, you know, I hate
it when everyone says,

"Having a baby makes you
part of the world."

I really resent that.

I don't need one of those
to be able to look around.

You know? I don't... it's like having a
truck driven through your vagina, isn't it?

Totally. So, then I'll
just put it out there...

is being a writer and being
a woman at the same time,

is it as hard as it seems or...?

Harder.

I'm not scared.

As long as I can keep my
mother alive, I'm not scared.

You mean tell me mission
does not scare you?

What scares me is losing
the woman who raised me.

What scares me is the cancer

taking over her whole body
and, finally, her head...

robbing her of oxygen and
of the will to live.

What scares me is this world.

- No, I'm not scared.
- Cut!

- Jesus fucking...
- Cut, please, now!

Take break, Jadviga.

What?

Still, I feel there's
no emotions from you,

this feeling of big nothing,

which, for me, is not okay.

I still don't understand why
he's talking so much right now.

He is fucking scared.

And... and he's been so private about
his mother's illness up until now.

So, what is it about now

that makes him all of a sudden
wanna go on and on and on...

- These are lines to explain!
- Yes, I know. I know.

I just think I could do a better
job if I don't say the lines.

So, which lines would you say, hmm?

No lines.

No lines?

With no lines, no story! Just...

I... I want lines
sometimes, Director Olatta.

Other times, I don't. It just depends.

Adam, you're very talented,

but I cannot keep with the debating you!

It gets me so frustrate!

I'm also very frustrate, okay?!

I think we both want the same thing.

We wanna make the best
movie we possibly can

in the shortest amount of time.

I'm saying we're limited, unfortunately.

Yesterday, I'm completely here and...

this is so fucking rude to
talk about someone and...

Fuck this!

Uh, good-bye. It was nice meeting you.

What?

Best of luck with
your son's graduation.

I'm fucking leaving!

"Wh-what? What?"

This thing is itchy as fuck!

Oh, you're so hot.

- I wanna come.
- Fuck me. Yes, please come.

And then I'll come with
your cum in my body.

Okay, great.

- I want a countdown.
- Yeah.

Five, four, three, two...

You came early.

Hold on. Almost there.

I wanna die inside the
mouth of a lion with you.

And that way, we can
be together forever,

even in the moment of our own death.

Your death and my death, right?

Hello?

Huh?

Yeah.

What?

I would literally die for
someone to say that to me.

That's, like, fucking poetry.

It's, like, Shakespeare.

Yeah, no, it is poetry.

It's beautiful and flattering.

- Good.
- Yeah.

But couldn't we just, like, um...

just get dinner sometimes?

Yeah.

I feel like I haven't
seen you in weeks.

You're always at rehearsal or
booty body camp, whatever it is.

Ray, it's not my fault if I
wanna get strong for myself.

Yeah, no, I know.

And that's great. That's good.

And you are strong. It's just...

I don't know. Look, I wanna be
in the lion's mouth with you.

- That sounds nice.
- Good.

It sounds cozy and warm and
exciting and dangerous.

But I also, I don't know...

don't you just wanna,
like, get dumplings

and throw down a few
beers and just catch up?

See what you've been up to and stuff?

Yeah, obviously that would be great.

That's, like, if you asked me
like, "What's your ideal plan?"

That's my ideal plan.

Well, let's do it. Let's do it tonight.

Oh, no, I can't tonight. I have a thing.
And don't ask.

It's far too long and boring a
story to explain what it is.

But, actually, that reminds me,

it's gonna be a total
nightmare getting uptown.

Do you think if I Uber,
it will be made worth it

if I'm able to meditate and
catch up on emails in the car?

Or should I try to
meditate on the train?

I mean, last time I tried
to meditate on the train,

some dude was manspreading next to me.

And it's just... it's harder,

but maybe that's a better challenge
to my ability to remain mindful.

- It's just such a much steadier...
- Huh?

Should I Uber?

What?

Uber. Yeah.

You can take an Uber.

Hot rod in my urethra.

Pipe cleaner.

It feels like a pipe cleaner's in there.

Ow. Ugh!

"Law & Order: UTI." Gong-gong!

It's not funny. It feels so bad, okay?

And I didn't even get this one from sex.

I just walked around in wet
underwear for a couple of days.

You're gross.

Hannah, can you text that one
interesting lesbian you know

and see if she can get me into the
"New York Mag" party tonight?

I don't know, Elijah.
My bladder's on fire.

I don't know if I feel like abusing
my media contacts for you right now.

Jaden Pinkett Smith is
starting a greeting card line.

Please! You're gonna look cool
for even knowing about it.

Can I at least have some pain killers?

Oh, I wish you had asked
me, like, two hours ago.

Clean out.

Well, will you tickle my back?

No.

You know how they're shutting
the N/R down at DeKalb?

Reminds me of this time

back when I was assistant to the
transportation commissioner

when... and they don't tell you this...

they shut the B down,

or let's just say they
pretended to shut the B down,

leaving it running only for the mayor

and his homosexual friends.

- Sorry.
- I think you can imagine

who I might be talking about.

But if you can't, picture this...

a train full of homosexuals,

me... I don't judge...

riding in secret.

Wow, that's a crazy story.

- Here you go.
- Oh, you can't imagine what I saw.

But my job was just to be quiet...

Sure, yeah, just to be quiet.

Here you go. It was really
nice seeing you, Bobby.

Thanks for coming in. I'll
see you tomorrow, okay?

- Have a good one.
- Yeah.

Uh, hey, is that scone
raisin or Craisin?

I don't know, man.

I don't know.

- Hey. Hey, Bobby?
- Oh, Jesus.

Bobby!

Guys, someone call 911!

Bobby?

Bobby?

and, Desi, it is my personal opinion

that we really need to get back to work.

More specifically, you
need to get back to work.

And I think it would be
good for your health.

Oh, for my health? Okay.

So, I should just bail on my recovery?

- Do you think that's a good idea?
- No.

Hey, nice doing business with you.
It's been great.

I mean, I don't wanna
play the blame game,

but you're my worst enabler.

What you just did right there...
and I don't wanna insult you...

but that was fucked up what
you just did right there.

- Okay.
- All right.

It's not an insult.
Nobody's blaming you.

Desi just feels as if maybe
you have helped to support,

- even encourage his relapse.
- Yeah.

Again, I'm not quite sure
how that isn't blaming me,

but we can discuss... you and
I can discuss that later.

But I think that the idea, Desi,

that I have, in some way,

caused you to develop an
addiction to something

is absurd.

- No, that's... no, it's not...
- Oh, my God!

- It's not absurd.
- Oh, am I...

you're hearing what I'm hearing, right?

- Because...
- It's okay, it's okay.

We're going to let Desi
finish, and when he's done,

you can then let us know how you feel.

I promise you I'll
give you tons of time.

Okay, you finish now, and then
I'll have my time to talk.

I've been thinking...

I've been thinking...

- Can I have some water?
- Yeah, have some water.

- Take your time.
- Mm.

Jesus.

Good. Good.

As I was saying...

I've had a lot of time
to think about this.

And I take full responsibility
for where I'm at.

That said,

Marne, you were there with me the
whole time, right next to me.

You were my partner,
but you never saw me.

You just saw this dick...

or this voice, you know,

or this guitar, or this record contract.

You had this idea about me, but you
never actually saw me as a human.

- Me, Desi.
- Mm.

And I fucking loved you.

It wasn't like your friends,
like little Hannah and the gang,

saying Marnie doesn't, you know,
care about the environment,

or Marnie's poetry is repetitive,

or rolling their eyes
and dismissing you,

saying, "Oh, that's just
so Marnie, you know?"

I fucking loved...

I loved when things were Marnie.

- Mm.
- You know? And I was all in.

I just couldn't handle me.

And you made that worse.

You did, because when I was struggling,

you know, you just shut down.

I mean, you just fucking walked away.

You gave up.

I shut down?

I gave up?

Do you have any idea how
hard this has been for me?

I have bruises all over my body

from the two-hour massages that I need

to deal with the stress
of your addiction.

Are you... are you serious?

Yeah.

- Did you hear what she said, man?
- Yeah.

Because you just made my whole
drug treatment about you.

You did.

You really did, Marnie.

And it's clear that your narcissism

is detrimental to Desi's recovery.

Can I just say one more thing?

Clean up your side of the
street, Marnie Marie.

Keep your side of the
street clean, Marnie Marie.

Common
traits exhibited by children

who go on to be diagnosed as sociopaths

- include displaying a lack of empathy...
- Yep.

- harming animals...
- Guilty.

- setting fires...
- Yeah.

- and petty vandalism.
- Oh, my God.

I did so much of this stuff.

Adam...

I think I may have been
a child sociopath.

I mean, I've completely outgrown it,

but I'm a miracle.

I think I may have to
write a term paper on me.

I just quit the fucking movie.

Fuck! The fuck did I do?

I'm sure it's fine. Can't you
just go back and apologize?

These Eastern Europeans are used
to all this coming and going.

I can't fucking do this anymore.

Wait around like some tool

to be someone else's fucking tool!

This shit's just so fucked!

I'm just gonna tell my agent
to take me out of the game

because I'm so fucking pissed!

Yeah, I know, darling.

I know.

Do you get to keep those jeans, though?

I-I'm sorry? You don't know.

You can do your job without a whole
crew of assholes in your face.

You just have one fucking
psycho to analyze.

Like you?

Ha!

Adam, this is why I'm saying you
need to make your own movie.

You are an artist!

I'm someone who knows how to
psychologically support an artist.

You can't just make a movie, Jessa.

You need funds and sandwiches

and people who care what you have...

I mean, honestly, you're so boring.

We can get that stuff.
We'll sort that out.

Money literally grows on trees.

I mean, really, let's look this up.

"Making a movie."

There's a lot.

God damn, that was stressful.

Right in the middle of a
busy workday like that,

just thwack, down he goes.

Yeah, wow.

Jose said his head smacked
the ground really hard.

I feel bad.

He was trying to tell me this long,
elaborate story about Ed Koch,

some secret gay train, but
I was working, you know?

You can't... you can't listen
to everyone at the same time

or your fucking head
will explode, you know?

Maybe it's about picking
who to listen to.

What's that supposed to mean?

How long were you on
the community board?

Three months?

Then you quietly retreated back
to dating girls with six packs

and pretending death wasn't real.

I'm worried about you, Ray.
You're smart.

You've always been smart,
but your priorities are...

cuckoo bananas.

And what, you're some
fucking golden example?

You hate your wife. You hate your job.

The only thing that gives you a
glimmer of joy on this planet

is recycling soda cans.

- It's free money!
- You know what, Herm?

You're starting to really
fucking piss me off.

You know that? I work hard for you.

I work hard for this business,

and you're gonna stand there
and call me a waste of space?

Hmm? I don't need you to judge me

for not letting Bobby gnash his
dentures in my fucking face.

And who made you God, by the way?

I don't think I'm God, Ray.

Good, because there is no God.

That's a very arrogant position, Ray.

Congratulations.

I've been with you through
all these phases...

the music, the failed sitcom script,

the communism, community board,

and now you're just coasting.

And I'm probably responsible.

All right, you know what, Hermie?

It's been a brutal fucking day.

I'm not getting into
this with you right now.

So sensitive, so testy.

Come on, Ray-Ray.

I'm not calling you a waste of space.

I'm calling you a waste of potential.

I'm going home, wherever
the fuck that is.

- Hi, Mommy.
- Hi.

I got my Tracy on, and
you're right, it's amazing.

All these tiny muscles
I didn't know I had.

Yeah, it's a really great program.

I'll get those tapes back from you

just as soon as my knee's healed.

Mom, I have blood in my pee again.

Again? Let me see.

Mm, sorry.

Ooh. Okay, okay.

You have to go to the ER.

I don't wanna go to the ER, Mom.

I'm on deadline. I can't.

All right, Hannah, just go.

Fine.

No one's making movies about
actual human people anymore.

And that's where we come in.

You know, it has to be
raw and honest, real.

Yeah, and the only shit that's real
is shit that actually happened.

Yes. Yes!

We have to mine our lives for the truth.

You know, like, even
if it fucking hurts,

even if it's too painful
for us to even comprehend.

Yes.

Adam, like us.

Like us with Hannah.

- No, no, no, no, no.
- Yes. Yes!

- We can't.
- What do you mean we can't?

It's perfect. It's perfect.

It's about relationships,

it... it's about loyalty and deceit,

and it's raw, it's
powerfully true, Adam.

And it might even be cathartic for us.

You know, help us to move on
from this mess and be free.

- Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
- Yes!

I'm, like, so sweaty right now.

- This might be it.
- Yes.

It explains everything
about human nature.

How even with the best of intentions

we can't help but hurt each other.

- Yes!
- It's like a metaphor for war

and... and corporations
and religious strife.

- All that shit! Yes!
- Yes, yes!

Oh, Jesus!

Adam!

Oh, my God. We might be a
pair of goddamn geniuses.

- Wait.
- What?

We have to shoot it on film.

Yep. Okay. Like, fine.

In black and white.

- Too much?
- Yeah.

Yeah, too much.

I'm slipping.

Oh, fuck.

Oh, shit.

I'm not sure if you remember me.

Uh, I remember you.

- How you doing?
- Good.

Good, yeah.

Yeah, I mean, I'm in
private practice now.

Just pick up a few shifts
a week here to help...

The uninsured. It's very noble.

But I do want you to know I
tried to sign up for Obamacare

and the website fucked me over, so...

Well, I'll get right on that.

Um, I have a UTI.

I get them all the time, so I
need, like, Cipro, Pyridium,

codeine if you're feeling, you
know, fun and fancy.

Yes, your urine tested
positive for infection.

In the future,

I'd come see us a few days
earlier when the symptoms start.

Yeah, it's just sometimes
hard to tell if it's, like,

just the baseline level of weirdness
of my urethra or an actual issue,

so it's like what's being alive
and what's an infection?

These are my questions.

I'm not sure if you... if
you pee after intercourse,

but that can also help
in preventing them.

And, plus, you're pregnant.

Do you know that?

I do now.

You know what? The hug kind of
feels like the wrong thing,

so I'm gonna...

Do you know who the father is?

Yeah, he's a waterski instructor

who I'm not likely to see again, so...

He's thrilled.

Listen, um...

the abortion is an
out-of-pocket expense,

but if you need help, I can bring you.

I can have a friend handle
it, somebody I trust.

What makes you think I want an abortion?

- Are you serious?
- Mm-hmm.

Thanks for your help. I'll just
use my expired antibiotics.

How dare Hermie accuse
me of wasting my potential?

Huh? The audacity.

What has he done with his life?

He's got 20 years of wasted
potential on me. 25!

Okay, well, maybe that's why
he's being so hard on you,

because, you know, he doesn't
want you to end up like him.

Yeah, because I won't
end up like him, ever.

Okay.

- Okay!
- Okay.

Fuck, I'm gonna totally end up like him.

- Well, I mean...
- And even if I did end up like him,

is that so wrong, is that so bad?

He's got a wife, he's got a business,

he's got the wisdom of a
thousand fortune cookies.

I mean, I don't know. Maybe that's...

maybe I'd be totally fine
if I ended up like him.

Well, maybe he wants you to have
a life that's better than fine.

Yeah.

Fuck, you're right.

That's exactly what he wants.

He wants me to be a better
version of himself.

I'm gonna go apologize
to him right now.

Okay, good.

And you know what? Yeah, maybe
it is time I make some changes.

Maybe it is time I do
something fucking real.

Uh-huh.

You know, something
people will remember.

- You know?
- W-wait, like kill yourself?

What?

I'm sorry, it just really sounded like

you were gearing up to that.

I'm not gonna kill myself, Shosh.

- Okay, good.
- Good.

- Do you wanna kill yourself?
- No, don't. No.

- We'll talk about this later.
- Great.

Or not.

That got real fast.

- Hi.
- Hey.

We're here to discuss a
creative project with you.

Well, uh, it's... it's a film.

- Yeah.
- It's a film about the complex dynamic

that the three of us have
been fostering for years now

if you really think about it.

And I know it's really, really painful,

so you don't have to
make the decision now

whether you wanna sign a release or not.

No, no, no. No, we're so not there yet.

- We're way far down.
- We, um... no.

We just want you to think about
how rich this is, cinematically.

You know? And to think about
the story that we could tell.

And we just would really hope

that you will grant us
permission to share

what has transpired with the world

and sort of elegantly unfold this...

This little package, really.

It's... I mean, eh.

You guys should do whatever you want.

- Hey.
- Hey. What about the party?

Ugh, it was total bullshit.

It was just, like, a bunch of old gays

being like, "Oh, I'm so
busy during the week.

I can only do uppers on the weekends."

Oh, well, good for you, Anthony.

- Did you go to the ER?
- Uh-huh.

Yeah? You get some
drugs, little Eponine?

Yeah, I'm okay.

Did they give you
something for the pain?

Mm-mm.

Those unfeeling bastards.

Come, come.

Put your little head on my lap.

Come, come.

There you go.

Come here, little girl.

I'm sorry I'm using my pizza hand.

Just adding more grease
to this situation.

Hermie?

You there?

I'm opening up, you deaf bastard.

Coming in.

Hermie?

Hermie?

Hermie?

Hermie?

Hey.

Hermie?

Hey, wake up. I gotta talk to you.

Hey.

Hermie.

Hey.

Hermie.

Hey, Hermie.

Hey!

Wake up, you motherfucker!

Wake up! Hey!

Hermie!

Hey! Hermie!

- sync and corrections by Mr. C -
- www.addic7ed.com -