Original subtitles

Subtitles by explosiveskull

You're listening to your very own

Nyungar Boodjar Regional Radio,

raising the bar in community funded local broadcasting.

Regular listeners won't need reminding that

"boodjar" means "country"

and we respectfully acknowledge the Nyungar people

traditional owners of this beautiful land

and pay our respects to their elders, past and present

And what is it I always say at this point, friends?

That's right. Another year, another Westival.

Has it really been a year?

How did that happen?

As John Lennon said,

"life is what happens while you're making other plans."

And were the great man alive today, he might very well say,

"Hey, Yoko,

"let's make plans to visit the Gladstone Heritage Village in Noongar Boodjar,

"for the sixteenth wonderful Westival,

"Western Australia's premiere, rurally based community folk event."

It's a camping holiday, but with folk music.

What's not to love?

♪ Follow

♪ Follow the sun

♪ Which way the wind blows

♪ When this day is done ♪

Another fabulous Westival.

Or some other word starting with F.

Sir? Only headline artists on site, sir.

That is blue tagged vehicle. You are tagged

green for camping.

I need you to exit the area immediately.

I have to have power to rehearse. I've got permission.

Open the back of the vehicle, sir.

Okay, I've got the tags and passes, wristbands, also keys.

Don't lose them.

Yep.

So they put us in the same rooms.

I'm in Woody Guthrie and you guys are sharing Dolly Parton

If only.

Gets funnier every year, guys.

Sir, I do no see an instrument.

No, you're right. It's actually a mobile bomb factory.

Wrong decision!

It was a joke! It was a joke!

It's a musical instrument. It's a theremin.

A lot of people think Brian Wilson used one on Good Vibrations,

but that was a tannerin.

Sir, security is never a laughing matter.

You have had your first and your last warning.

Do not disappoint me.

Hey.

Hey.

Just settling in, Da. So I'll see you in the bar?

You read my mind, love.

Not a very long book.

Gramps, we got our usual place.

Brilliant. Same as every year.

Ruby, darling, can you keep it down, please?

I need to finish this call.

No, I can't come back. This weekend

is sacrosanct mother-daughter time.

But I will be on my tablet,

so I'll be checking emails and reading texts.

Hi.

Not quite the same this year, Rubes.

No, Granddad, of course not.

But Grandma would want you to still have a good time.

So you have to.

For her.

Nobody played accordion like your Gran.

Good to go, Neilo!

Good to go, Glenys!

Let's go. Back it nice and slow. Cone, Glenys!

Okay. Steady steady steady, cone, Glenys!

Steady, steady, steady, steady

back, back, back, back, back, all right!

Lock and load! Great parking, Neilo.

Well done, Glenys. Nice cone work.

You're still listening to Festival Folk

and with us this morning, the very lovely Diamond,

a top little singer from Mandjoogoordap

and an old friend of Nyungar Boodjar Regional radio.

We're going to be chewing over all things Westival

for the next half hour or so

but first up,

would you give us a song, Diamond?

I certainly would, Queenie. That would be awesome.

I'd like to play for you an alternative take

on a much-loved Aussie folk song

which I think better reflects the sexual politics

of post-invasion Australia.

It's called Raping Matilda.

Please don't sing along.

♪ Once a jolly sexist Conforming to his gender role

♪ Within a colonial patriarchy

♪ And he sang as he sat Just another white supremacist

♪ Who'll come invading Australia with me? ♪

♪ We're Feminasty We own this town

- ♪ We're driving to the festival - ♪ Nobody gonna stop us all

- ♪ Driving in a hot pink car - ♪ Word!

♪ Don't be fricken with my bizzle

- ♪ We're Feminasty shizzle - ♪ Go Courtney in the back And Indi on my side ♪

♪ And her ghost may be heard

♪ As she dances around the billabong

♪ Who'll come castrating The swagman with me ♪

No tax on tampons.

Thank you. You've been amazing.

No, thank you, Diamond, for a very thought provoking and contemporary take

on a tale of early Australian wanderers and

perhaps the appropriate moment to reflect on the fact

that our very own Gladstone Heritage Village

was once home to many homeless little wanderers.

That is so true, Queenie.

Poor

ravaged and rickety Pommy mites

sent here under the UK Child Migration Scheme.

Nearly sixty-five years since I first stood on those steps.

I know, Granddad.

Funny.

We didn't even want to come here.

Now everybody does.

Well, I couldn't find anyone playing the rubab,

but there are a number of mandolin recitals.

Which is similar to the rubab,

although of course with twelve less strings.

I wonder if we should be pushing for a response.

I'm not pushing.

I'm trying to connect.

Members of Westival's Recovering Alcoholic Community

your meeting's venue has been moved to

the place they used to have the bar.

Bob and Sharon in the Festival office clearly have a sense of irony.

Don't you love it?

Delivery. Four cases of beer. Who wants it?

Steady, people. Steady.

See this as a challenge.

So Diamond, do you have any personal must-sees

that you've picked out from the Festival brochure?

Well Queenie, I love anything that challenges form,

so today I'm super excited to check out the theremin revolution.

Mmm!

Which you Westival folk can find down at the small workshop hut.

Yes!

Thank you, Queenie.

And of course, the theremin was the instrument

that Brian Wilson used to get the weird woo-woo sound...

in Good Vibrations.

Oh my God, bitches.

I just got a 99.9 ATAR.

I'm school Dux.

Damn, girl, that's amazing!

Isn't it!

I... I mean, not that I give a...

swag. It's all bullshit.

Obvs, Courtney.

What up?

What is up?

I'm Dexter.

Got some quinoa falafel or

small batch, slow brewed, steam filtered

bottle conditioned organic sarsaparilla.

And you're on Tinder.

Ah, excellent.

Later?

Maybe.

Quinoa falafel and an over-complicated sarsaparilla, please.

Totally. Ain't no thing.

My annual protest

to demand the closure of the Gladstone asylum seeker detention camp

This is actually very important.

No, so I need the ceramics checked and shipped by close of business.

Asylum seekers.

Detention camps.

If we'd have just left them on their boats, we wouldn't need to lock em up.

Gramps, they're refugees. We have a UN obligation.

Refugees!

Pull the other one.

They just wanna come and live here.

Well what if they do? You were an immigrant once.

I was seven years old and I wasn't given a choice.

And I was put straight to work.

I had to earn my bit of Australia.

I didn't just turn up and demand it.

So

welcome to the theremin revolution.

Both in the room and streaming to the International Theremin Community worldwide.

Hiya, Adalbert.

It's pretty late in Norway,

so thanks for checking in.

'Cause this revolution is all about what I call

"techno folk funk."

What drum'n'bass and hip hop were to Generations X and Y.

I believe that techno folk funk will be to Generation...

Well, whatever the next letter is.

It could be Z.

Settled in for the full session, have we Eamon?

Trawling for business, are you?

We don't trawl.

People have to come of their own accord.

Oh, don't be so coy, Pam.

You know you're itching to get me into your joyless little losers' club.

Well I think you may have a problem.

Well you see, Pam

if you take a teaspoon full of sherry

of an evening and it causes you to beat your wife

then, it's a problem.

- You follow me? - It's complex,

but I'm with you so far.

But on the other hand, if you drink all day,

every day, but you do your work, you pay your tax,

and you love your daughter, then you don't have a problem.

You have a...

A habit.

And I... I'm a creature of habit.

Well, leave you with your mate.

Just to dispel a couple of popular theremin myths.

the instrument that Brian Wilson used on Good Vibrations is a

tannerin.

The theremin's pitch is controlled by a single vertical oscillator.

Sorry to state the obvious.

How do you, like, compose on a theremin?

I don't think you do compose on the theremin.

You sculpt music.

Sick image.

So sick.

The air is my clay.

Hay fever.

Man, this is crap.

They only booked us so they can tick off the diversity boxes.

You're getting paid and you're keeping out of trouble.

What's your problem?

Jumping round in a nappy for a mob of white fellas.

That's fucking what.

Twenty! Jessie did another twenty.

Seventeen rhymes with clucks and three rhymes with hunts.

That's a dollar in the lolly fund.

Gidday, folks! Name's Jack.

Welcome to my country.

That's a lot of cables. Lot of dials.

Not organic enough for you?

Well let's just say it's not what you normally find at a folk workshop.

Yes, of course, we want wood and bone and gut,

don't we? We want...

Bits of animal skin stretched over hand-turned hazelnut.

We want things that we can touch and strum and blow.

That's what you're thinking, isn't it?

No, certainly not. I don't judge people.

Even people who seem absolutely determined to be judged.

Okay.

I actually liked what you did.

Really? You liked my music?

Well I liked your passion. Your commitment.

But did you like the music?

I'd buy a CD.

A CD? What century is this?

Well, I can put it on a USB and you can stick that in your computer.

I don't have a computer. I have a phone.

I mean, maybe you could give me your email

and I'll send you a link?

Okay.

So who do you play your theremin with?

Are you in any bands?

No, I play alone, to tracks I make myself.

And how do you avoid disappearing up your own ass?

I don't.

I quite like it there. Maybe one day the world will join me.

What kind of tracks do you make?

I like uh...

"Found" sounds.

Finding music in stuff where there isn't music.

A creaking door. A dripping tap.

I once captured a cane toad fart.

In a bottle?

On an iPhone.

I know.

Well it sounds like a real crowd pleaser.

I'm not interested in pleasing crowds.

In which case you have picked the right instrument.

It was nice chatting.

My gig is, is here at 4:30,

you know, just if you were interested.

Maybe.

Okay bye.

Bye.

Anyone can drum!

Try this!

And this.

Put it together, what do you get?

You see? Now you're all drummers.

It's that simple!

Come on, tighten it up.

That's it. Good, good, good, good.

Bob, look like you mean it.

Okay lads, hold up.

Ah, can I have a word, Henry?

Mmm-hmm.

Look, I'm no Muriel,

but I am doing my best to sit in with Rodney.

Muriel always considered you a very fine player, Gwyn.

I was thinking,

that we should maybe do some fundraising for cancer research,

in her honor.

Yes.

What about doing a nude calendar?

You know, with bells and flowers over all our bits.

What do you think?

I think she'd prefer a cake stall, Gwyn.

Why do I have to be on the end of the line, Henry?

Somebody's got to be at the end of the line, Bob.

It's the nature of a line that there's somebody on the end of it.

Yeah, but I've... I've got no one to click my stick against.

I'm just waving it around. Makes me look silly.

The fact that there's nobody at the end of the line

to click your stick against

is a problem that's bedeviled

the Morris dancing community for hundreds of years.

Couldn't we just dance in a circle?

We dance in a circle when tradition dictates,

and only when tradition dictates.

We could change it up a bit.

Like doing a nude calendar.

We are not doing a nude calendar, Gwyn.

You can't change traditions.

It's... It's a contradiction in terms.

All right lads, one more time, with music.

Well, here we all are again.

Yeah, here we are again.

Lovely.

Yeah, lovely. Cheers.

Cheers.

Another botski?

Oh, why not?

Good idea.

Lovely.

That was my take on Smells Like Teen Spirit by Nirvana.

Excuse me, that's funny?

Just I didn't recognize a single note, that's all. I...

Well, if it sounded the same there wouldn't be much point

in my reinterpreting it, now would there?

Okay. Do you jam?

Do I jam?

Yeah.

Brought my fiddle.

Well, this is a recital. It's not a party.

You start. I'll come in on top.

Well these people have come to hear the theremin, am I wrong?

Actually, I think adding a fiddle might be really special

in a random sense.

Have you got anything a little less funky,

a little more folky in your box of loopy tricks?

Okay.

Let's see here.

Yeah, that's good.

Phew.

How was it for you?

It... it was pretty good.

There's only fourteen people in the audience

but there's over forty thousand years of history on the stage.

Fuck this show.

Listen here, Jessie.

I stuck my neck out for you.

The only reason you're not in detention right now

is because I told Juvie you were a dancer.

So you will be a dancer.

Oh, we really played up a storm, didn't we?

I've never blown up an amplifier before.

Well that's 'cause you've never played with me.

Did... Did you get the music I emailed?

Oh, no. I'm sorry, I don't really check email.

I'm more of a Facebook girl.

We just use email for bookings and stuff. My Dad does that.

I'll get him to dig it out.

And I'm Keevey, by the way.

Roland.

Hi.

Keevey, that's a... That's a nice name.

Thanks, yeah. I'm Irish, like you.

Real Irish, or been living in Australia for seven generations

and still claiming to be Irish?

Is it important?

I think it is.

I think we live in an increasingly

globalized, homogenized society

into which every culture is dissolving.

Right.

But instead of meeting that challenge

and creating new social paradigms

people claim spurious ethnic credibility,

courtesy of Google family trees.

Wow, okay.

"Oh, my great-grandmother's from Tipperary

"and that makes me a feisty rebel with the soul of a poet."

How about being a rebel?

How about writing a poem...

Both my parents were born in County Cork.

Is that good enough for you?

Yes, that's okay. One degree of separation is legitimate.

They had a right to call you Keevey.

Oh, phew! Thank you, that's so generous of you.

You need to chill.

I don't want to chill.

Chilling is a post-modern word for apathy and indolence.

- Seriously? - Definitely seriously.

You have to maintain your rage.

Johnny Rotten said, "anger is an energy."

Well so is glucose, but you can have too much of it.

Excuse me,

I think I have the room booked now.

Oh, uh...

Not to be heavy.

No no, I... Let me put my equipment in the corner

and I'll be out of your hair.

Then coffee?

Yes.

Two seconds.

So Jack, can you tell us a little bit about the dance

you're going to do?

Well I'd like to, Queenie, but I can't.

Because you see, I'm Aboriginal and therefore not actually here.

I think I know where you're going with this, Jack.

Is this Terra Nullius?

When those white fellas first turned up,

they said the land was empty,

that all those black fellas they were shooting didn't actually exist.

So if you weren't here then, then you can't be here now.

That's right, Queenie.

But I'm joking, of course.

I am here,

and you're here, because Australia was never empty.

Your mob invaded it

and since no treaty was ever signed,

Australia remains an occupied country.

Fair cop, Jack.

Now let's enjoy the wonderful Westival sights

and sounds and shapes of Dancing Dream.

Occupied country, my ass!

I bloody helped build this country.

Don't look so glum!

Come and have a drum.

In the sun it's fun fun fun!

Yeah yeah, banging is not drumming.

Yes, it is. What's this?

Well in the absence of fills, flams, ghosts, polyrhythm

paradiddle, quarter notes, rolls, shuffles, triplets,

quads, backbeat, drags,

descendos, bembè, and bossa nova,

I'd say it was just banging.

And it's fun!

For you, maybe.

Not for us.

Oh, God.

Ukuleles.

You don't like ukuleles?

I love ukuleles.

It's the people playing them that I can't stand.

What?

The ukulele isn't an instrument anymore.

It's a lifestyle.

It's a low-tech dating app for middle-aged divorcees.

How can you be so judgmental of other people's musical choices?

Well, music is my life.

Your living?

No, living is a small dog washing business

but if it helps,

I was the youngest ever member of the Irish Youth Orchestra.

On the theremin?

I played a few other things.

Like?

Mandolin, harpsichord, guitar, double bass, piccolo, and bassoon.

And you chose the theremin?

Eventually.

I just wasn't good enough at the others.

I came to accept that I'm not a true artist,

just a gifted technician.

So I challenged myself to the world's most technical instrument.

Sounds to me like you just choose an instrument

that so few people play

you could have a good shot at being the best at it.

No, I've given up trying to be best,

but I know it when I see it. And I see it in you.

Who's the handsome fella Keevey's with?

Do you know him?

No, she loves 'em and leaves 'em, just like her Dad.

I suppose she saw what a big mistake her Mum made

settling for an asshole like you

and she doesn't want to repeat it.

That may be it.

The women in my family always had the brains.

Oh Jesus, Eamon,

can't you even drink your coffee straight?

I could, my darling, but I do not choose to.

Where did you train?

Didn't. Music's just in the family.

Your parents play?

Dad does. Mum did.

Sorry,

don't buy that.

Music isn't something you choose.

If you can just drop it, you never had it.

She died.

Ah.

That old excuse.

Car crash. Hit a tree. I was sixteen.

Well,

if there is a heaven,

which I'm afraid there definitely isn't,

I imagine she's pretty proud.

I don't think she'd really care that much.

She dumped me anyway.

- Dumped you? - Left.

Dad came home pissed one too many times

and she shot through.

So in fact she dumped him.

Put it this way.

I wasn't enough to make her stay.

Rolly, mate!

Hey, Jack!

Didn't expect to see you at Westival.

Too many actual tunes for you, I'd have thought.

This bloke plays the dumbest instrument in Australia

and that's coming from a fella who plays a hollow stick.

This is Jessie.

He plays a bit of guitar.

I told him you might show him a few shapes.

Not interested.

If I dock his money he'll be interested.

Roland's an amazing fella.

Any talent a kid's got,

he'll find it and work with it.

Jack does a midnight jam for kids in Freo who are out on the streets.

That's very cool.

So, how about it? Will you give him a go?

Well sorry Jack,

I'd like to help, but you can't teach a reluctant student.

They have to want to learn.

Come on, you two.

Bye.

You know, I like that song you were playing.

Impressions of Nirvana?

I kinda liked the not remotely like Nirvana.

But no, it was the other one.

The... You were playing it in your workshop.

It was... It was pretty.

It was like a siren voice.

Oh, just the freeform.

Extemporizing.

Yeah, that was sculpted and then forgotten.

Not by me.

That's incredible.

I can't believe you remembered it.

Yeah, well I liked it. It drew me in.

It's why I call it Siren Voice.

Well, that's all from me for another day

and uh, I'll be at the WArrikins gig later.

And for my younger listeners, a band called Feminasty

will be playing right here in the chapel,

and they tell me they intend to really kick some bottom.

So uh, that sounds like fun.

This is Queenie, wishing you all a folking good night.

It's a joke. Please don't write in.

Nice digs.

You think?

Well I'm sleeping in my microvan.

It's a bit of a squeeze.

Room enough for one, if you sleep at an angle.

No Mrs, Theremin, then?

No genius techy girl geek blowing your fuse?

Being a musician is not great for relationships.

Oh, tell me about it.

I'm never anywhere for more than a couple of days.

I've been trying Tinder, but really,

to be honest, I'm kind of over it.

- Tinder? - Mmm-hmm.

Wow. Really?

Yeah.

People always think it's weird when girls are on it

but plenty are, otherwise it wouldn't work, would it?

And it would be Grindr.

It does get lonely on the road sometimes.

Mmm.

But anything truly worthwhile requires sacrifice.

Music can't be a part-time thing,

particularly for someone like you.

I just play the fiddle. It's no big deal.

You don't just play the fiddle, Keevey,

really you don't. You... You inhabit it.

You have a special gift.

Bet you say that to all the violinists.

No. Just you.

Oh, wow, that was really, really nice. Thank you.

It's not very cool to thank a girl for a kiss, Roland.

It's a little weird.

Oh, sorry. Of course, it's just, you know, it's been a while.

I like your hands. They're really soft.

Well I shampoo dogs for a living and play a non-contact instrument.

You're not going to build up a lot of callouses.

Maybe you should play a contact instrument sometime.

- Tea? - Yes, please.

It'll have to be herbal. I don't have any milk.

I love herbal.

Keevey?

You need to make a plan.

What sort of a plan?

A music plan to raise your game

and match your potential.

A gift like yours isn't going to find that kind of stimulus

playing crappy little festivals like the Westival.

It's a great little festival.

It's too safe.

It's too comfortable.

What's the point of a festival if it doesn't push the boundaries,

invert forms?

Instead, they book idiot drummers with pirate hats

and dinosaur pub rock bands

like the West Australian Rikins.

I think they pronounce it the WArrikins.

It's a play on "larrikin." The West Australian Larrikins.

Oh, I didn't get that.

Have you ever seen them play?

I don't need to.

I've read the program. "A grand bit of Irish craic."

If you've never seen an act, then how can you know anything about them?

I've never seen the Earth's core but I know that it's approximately

ninety percent iron and nickel,

and I know that the West Australian Rikins

are at least ninety percent shit.

And you, Roland, are one hundred percent asshole.

Sorry?

Which is a shame, because you have really nice hands.

Now I need to get ready for a gig and you need to go.

But what about the herbal...

The tea is canceled.

Door is that way.

Unless maybe you want to...

Buy a poster, or a CD? Eighteen bucks.

Fuck.

Hey hey, great Festival, eh? It's great, isn't it? Hey, buddy.

Pretentious twat.

We're off to see a show, Jafaar.

You should come.

Honest, the WArrikins are brilliant.

Who's pushing now?

No? Okay, no worries.

What are you writing? Letter?

Don't interrogate him!

I'm not interrogating him, I'm talking to him.

Well it sounds like interrogating.

Name's Henry, son.

That's Ruby.

- Adopted? - Gramps!

What?

He's obviously not related.

He's a completely different color.

Gramps!

Fostered?

Yeah, I was kinda fostered myself.

Not to a family, to a farm school.

They told him he was an orphan, but he wasn't.

Doesn't make a great deal of difference, Rube.

Well the Prime Minister apologized.

Not at the time, obviously.

Chin up, son.

No point in looking back.

Gotta get on with it.

Gramps!

What?

♪ As I was going over

♪ The Cork and Kerry mountains

♪ I saw Captain Farrell And the money he was counting

♪ I first produced my pistol

♪ Then I produced my rapier

♪ I said stand and deliver Or the devil he may take ya

♪ Musha ring dum a doo dum a da

♪ Whack for my Daddy-o

♪ Whack for my Daddy-o

♪ There's whisky in the jar ♪

♪ Some men they like fishin' ♪

In your dreams.

Excuse me?

Any minor stepping onto premises

operating under State Temporary License

must be double tagged on both wrists

and accompanied by a registered supervising adult

holding photo ID.

Your carer's signature will need to be witnessed

by a non-family member for whom photo ID is also required.

Although a photocopy is permissible, if witnessed.

I just wanted to go inside and get a drink of water

so I don't dehydrate while I'm dan...

Oh, be-de-de-de-de-de do not make me take you down.

I'll just go.

Oh, absolutely delicious, girls.

Same every year.

First night...

I do mains.

And I do sweets.

Second night...

- I do sweets. - And I do mains.

Nasty lasty!

Or nasty nexty, I suggest.

The night is still young.

Same every year.

If it ain't broke, don't fix it.

Hi. Thank you.

Enjoy, guys.

Thanks for coming. Bye.

Well.

Look who came to see the West Australian Rikins, then.

I didn't know

it was your band.

Mmm. Well now you do.

So were we at least ninety percent shit, as presumed?

Look,

I'm not gonna pretend that pub rock is my scene.

It is not pub rock. It's folk rock.

Folk rock is pub rock.

The punters love it.

Punters loved Hitler.

Wow.

That... That is a big leap.

Well I'm here to sell CDs. Do you wanna buy a CD?

Yes.

Yes I would.

No, actually, you can't have one

because you don't even like our music.

So I suppose you're loitering around

to have another shot at me for which,

incidentally, you can wait until, I don't' know, the end of time.

Goodbye, Roland.

Keevey, let me just put your music on the net.

We don't want our music on the net.

The WArrikins are a live band.

Live is what we do.

I wasn't talking about the WArrikins, just you.

There is no just me, Roland.

So you're happy playing covers in a pub folk rock,

pub folk band?

Oh no, I'd much rather be a multi-instrumental genius dog washer.

This isn't about me, Keevey.

I think it is. I think it is all about you.

You are an inspired player.

I'm just a technically competent one.

Have you heard of the Académie Conservatoire?

Of course, I've heard of the Académie Conservatoire.

I saw Peter and the Wolf there when I was five.

They do a one year creative composition program.

I was on it, but I dropped out.

Roland, I have absolutely no qualifications.

It's entrance by audition.

And the Académie's going to pick me,

a mature age step-dancing fiddle player,

over a bunch of classically trained eighteen-year-old

private school kids?

They might.

Their whole thing is searching out the exception.

Coming to the bar, Keevey?

Yeah, I will.

Da, this is Roland.

He's a theremin player.

Yes, it's an electronic instrument...

I know what a fuckin' theremin is, son.

Brian Wilson used one on Good Vibrations.

I'll see you there, Da.

Look, you seem to think I need some kind of directing

but if you ask me, you're the one who's lost.

I'm not lost, because I'm not going anywhere.

You are and you're wasted in the WArrikins.

Roland, I make my living in a band.

I took over from my Mum when I was sixteen years old.

How am I supposed to just restart my life now,

- even if I wanted to? - By...

Expanding your horizons.

By having a horizon, not just inheriting your mother's.

Nice.

We will never give up.

We will never give in.

We will stick together.

Feminasty forever!

♪ I stole some Jack And smoked crack

♪ To go down with my food

♪ And when I get there Well you better beware

♪ Cos I'm in a real good mood ♪

Hey bro, you got a problem?

I didn't, but I do now.

Okay bro, just chill.

I'm not your bro, white boy.

All my bros are in detention.

Hey, it's Jessie, isn't it? And Kalti?

I'm Ruby. We're camped in your area.

You all camped in our area, girl.

This is Nyungar land.

Don't beat yourself up, son.

You're not the first fella to lose his heart to Keevey.

She's too good for your band.

Much too good.

Too good for the WArrikins?

Yes.

She's a truly gifted musician,

and a composer too, if her improvs are anything to go by.

And you're a party band for middle-aged pissheads.

You think you're the first person to notice that, do you?

Maybe the first person to say it.

I'm her Dad.

I know how bloody good she is.

Even better than her Ma, and that's saying something.

Well then why don't you tell her?

Don't insult me, son.

I'm not a fella it's clever to insult.

- Okay, bye. - I have told her.

Every Westival I say to myself

if Keevey's back here with you next time, you've failed.

She's got to leave the WArrikins.

Get away for her drunken old Da.

But until she decides that for herself

there's nothing any of us can do about it.

Excellent.

You should have come, Jafaar. It was absolutely brilliant.

Well we'll... We'll leave you to it, mate.

Oh, awesome.

Mmm.

Mmm, totally. We were awesome.

That was some good sex right there, lady, am I right?

Dexter, you know you can't sleep here, right?

Why not, sweet lips?

What up is that you have to go now.

Like go for real?

Sort of, yeah.

So it's just wham, bam, thank you, Dexter?

Well, you know, it's a tiny bed.

I have a headline show tomorrow.

You probably snore. I definitely snore.

You know, it's for the best.

Yeah, yeah, totally.

Cool.

It's not a thing.

Um, it's fine. I'm busy.

Heaps of things to do.

So, yeah, it's all good.

Wanna hook up tomorrow?

Rise and shine

all you wonderful Westifolks.

Our wonderful Westival is over for another year.

And remember, the Westival doesn't happen once a year.

The year happens once a Westival.

Better get a move on, love.

Kalgoorlie tonight, eight o'clock.

Back on the road again, huh?

Yeeha!

Gidday, little fella. What's up?

Young lady, are you stamping?

No, I'm wearing step shoes.

Sometimes I like to tap when I play.

Saves money on a drummer, you know?

This is an acoustically sprung, Tasmanian oak concert floor.

Please do not

tap dance.

Right, sorry, I won't.

Now we do not appear to have your curriculum vitae on file.

You were asked to supply one.

Yeah, I brought it with me. I can...

The Conservatoire is earth friendly.

We're striving for a paper-free environment.

Kindly scan it and email it.

I don't have a scanner.

Or a computer.

I live mainly on the road, out of a trailer.

Uh, my Dad has a laptop

we use for band stuff. Maybe I could

type it out and...

I presume this means that you'll also be working from paper sheets?

Sheets?

Sheet music.

What do you intend to play from?

I wasn't going to play from anything. I was going to improvise.

I see.

I thought all of your candidates would be able to read music,

so maybe you'd want...

I don't know, a bit extra.

A bit extra what?

Just a bit extra.

Well then, Keevey,

perhaps you could give us your chosen recital.

Plus a bit extra.

Okay.

This is my take on a lovely piece called the Mountain of Mourne.

Oh, yeah.

Thank you, uh, Keevey.

You may go.

Another year, another Westival.

Come rain, come shine, you can't stop us Westifolk

getting properly folked up.

Okay, same rooms, new names.

I'm in Kris Kristofferson

and you guys are sharing the Dixie Chicks.

Ooh, things are looking up.

And all the way from Mandjoogoordap,

Diamond is with us again.

Yay!

And what little gem do you have in mind for us today, Diamond?

Well Queenie, I'd like to offer you a contemporary take

on the famous Aussie Laughing Kookaburra song.

Oh, and what Aussie doesn't love that one?

They may love the song, Queenie,

but not the kookaburra as, due to deforestation,

there aren't any old gum trees left for them to sit in.

♪ Kookaburra stuffed In a glass display case

♪ Habitat destroyed by the human race

♪ Cry Kookaburra cry

♪ Kookaburra soon you'll be extinct ♪

Good to go, Glenys. Good to go, Neilo.

Let's make it happen.

Back it in. Cone one, let's go.

Nice and slow, Neilo. Nice and slow.

Cone two, Glenys, cone two.

That's nice. Back it in, back it in.

Nice and steady as she goes. Cone three, Glenys.

That's it. Hold it there. Lock and load.

Well, an exciting weekend ahead, I think.

Don't you, Jafaar?

Yes, Barbara. Very exciting.

Bitch didn't have it.

If you wanna make it, you've gotta own it.

A bitch just can't give up and go to Uni.

Feminasty pledge.

We will never give up.

We will never give in.

We will stick together.

Feminasty forever.

- Check it out. - Wow.

That is so cool.

Jessie, that's nothing to be proud of, mate.

Ain't it?

I am chatting with our very own Westival success story.

Roland, every dog has its own bark.

What is it about this specific bark?

Just a quality, Queenie, a timbre.

I'd been shampooing a Schnauzer,

massaging in the conditioner,

when she gave this little modulated staccato yelp

and I just thought

"Oh yeah."

You'd found a sound?

Well my view is, Queenie, that you don't really find a sound.

It finds you.

I caught that yelp on my iPhone,

sampled it onto a theremin lick and put it on my site

and next thing I know, everything has gone all kinds of crazy.

American rapper, Koolaz, was using your sample?

Exactly.

He'd been searching the net, looking for special interest sites,

as you do.

He typed in "yelping bitches"

and by lucky chance...

He found your Schnauzer.

He sampled my thero-schnau mash-up

onto his latest urban gangsta rap.

My Bitch Be A Dog?

That's right, Queenie. My Bitch Be A Dog.

Have you been coining millions?

Well not quite millions,

but I do get a healthy zero point zero zero

zero two percent of each download.

Which comes to?

About eight hundred dollars so far.

Well it's not too bad for a random bark.

Yeah. Although after taking legal advice,

I have agreed to split the money fifty-fifty with Mrs. Boo-Boo.

But it's great to be back here at Westival.

That shitty little festival?

I'm really looking forward to seeing Umid.

The traditional folk group from Afghanistan. Yes, yes.

It's great to see the Westival pushing boundaries

as opposed to taking the usual

easy, populist options.

Shut up!

I also love the way that the Westival makes really good folk music

so exciting and accessible.

I think the WArrikins are the best example of that.

Oh, we all love the WArrikins.

I used to be a little dismissive of folk rock myself

but it's through bands like the WArrikins

that I've really come to see its value.

Ruby, darling, there's a storm coming in.

I need to check these messages.

Can you please come out here and help me with this...

Fuck you, Mum.

You're a complete bitch and I hate this shitty festival.

Excuse me!

No no no no no, the FedEx notes are still in transit.

Well, here we all are.

No matter the weather, old friends, good times,

just the same.

Although, sometimes I think a change might be nice.

Why not?

Well they do say it's as good as a rest.

Here's a thought.

Why don't the girls swap around?

- What? - What?

Cherie can do mains tonight and Glenys can do dessert.

Well personally, I think things work fine just the way they are.

Tell you what,

why don't we discuss it over another botski?

Now you're talkin'!

For me, techno folk funk

is all about combining the infinite potential

of the digital age with real world found sounds.

I think that's what drew Koolaz to my work.

Let's just lay down a simple groove.

And then we're going to add the found sound.

But I mean, alone, it's just a dog barking.

So we add the thero-lick.

And you got techno folk funk.

And then the Koolaz rap kicks in.

Yeah, I'm afraid we don't have the rights to that bit so

why not just sit back and enjoy

the sick sounds of techno folk funk.

See the Merry Morris Men of Olde England.

Traditional dances brought to Australia by the very first settlers.

Gidday, Henry.

Been thinking of doing a little slot about Australian folk dancing

on my show.

Interested?

Bloody oath, I'm interested.

We were wondering if you could give our charity calendar a bit of a plug, Queenie.

It's called Cheeky Morris.

Have you done a nudie calendar?

Not us. Just Gwyn.

It's Gwyn all year.

January to December.

The print version's a bit slow, but the website's gone mad.

I'll bet it has.

I'm her IT resource.

Digital is the way of the future.

Save a tree, go paper free.

Thank you, friends.

And despite the fact that another year has gone by

without recognition of invasion in our Constitution,

meaning you're still an occupying force,

you've been a great crowd.

Jack, I need you.

I'm doing a show about traditional dance, and you're in it.

Whatever you want, Queenie.

That's right.

Hey.

Hey.

Whaddup?

Whaddup?

Yeah, it means "how's things."

Oh, I know what it means.

I just thought you had to be fifteen or a dickhead to say it.

Congrats on the Koolaz thing, by the way.

It's pretty amazing.

Well thanks. I'm... I'm not gonna lie. It feels pretty good.

What, pleasing a crowd?

I pleased myself.

If other people like it, well that's cool.

Well, of course, people liked Hitler.

Oh, right.

I get it. You think my techno folk rap fusion is

succumbing to populism?

Well, it's popular, isn't it?

And you have certainly succumbed.

I saw all those young ladies outside your workshop, taking selfies.

I didn't succumb. I've been embraced.

I'm not an elitist. I don't object to being popular.

Right. So on what level is you and your mate Koolaz making bong toking music

for stoners any different to the WArrikins making drinking music for drunks?

Every level. Okay, okay, not... Not every level.

I do admit I've been...

A little dismissive of what you do.

Really? You think?

You're angry at me because...

Because I've shown you what you're scared to do.

To take a risk. To follow your talent.

Really, have you? How's that?

Last year.

I left an envelope under your door.

Yeah, an application for the Conservatoire. I got it.

Well clearly you didn't act on it

because I know they would have killed for...

Actually I did.

You did?

Yeah, I applied and I auditioned and I was sent on my way.

I keep it with me just to remind me

how lucky I am to have a band and to make a living.

Those crazy idiots!

See, Roland, they're not crazy.

They're just realistic.

I gave that audition everything I had and guess what?

It wasn't enough.

I knew it, they certainly knew it

and the only reason you still don't know it is

'cause you're thinking with your dick.

Oh God no, absolutely not!

Come on, Roland, be honest.

If I was a 50-year-old fat dude

would you really be so concerned about my unique talent?

No, that... Look, that is beside the point.

Roland, I'm not your fantasy girl.

I am a 26 year folk chick

who dances a bit, plays the fiddle a bit,

and is lucky enough to get paid for it.

Now leave me alone. Go back to your groupies and your barking bitch.

But these bloody boat people are just jumping the queue!

Except if you think about it

the first Poms were boat people.

The people

the British displaced were Aborigines.

So if you're seriously suggesting to me

that their culture is of equal value to ours,

then you're an even bigger bloody idiot than I thought.

Look at that dance troupe.

If you call skipping around naked, covered in paint,

pretending to be an emu,

a dance.

Ha! Bloody ridiculous.

Ruby, it's a brand new phone.

I left it right here on the table.

Well luckily it's on the Cloud, so I don't know,

I'll just Find My Phone or something.

Find my uh, here we go.

Okay okay okay, it's searching.

Searching.

Oh dear.

Australia's a proud nation.

Founded on armed invasion and ethnic cleansing.

What's to be proud of?

Come to an Anzac dawn service, mate. You'll find out.

Where's the dawn service to all the black fellas

who died when the Europeans first came?

Where's the bloody memorial?

You'd need a wall as big as Uluru to put their names on.

It happened, all right?

And it's still happening.

I was taken away from my family when I was eight years old.

Think about that.

Australia's a proud country.

Well boys, if we're going to discuss the Stolen Generation

and the Anzac legend, we might need a... A little bit more time.

But at least we're talking.

Jack,

you'd better come.

Jessie's in trouble, and it isn't for saying "fuck."

You're a bloody fool, Jessie.

You're a bloody idiot.

You know you're tagged.

Call the police, Olivia.

Come on, he'll get youth detention.

Let me deal with him.

I swear I'll sort him all out.

You're big on the law when it comes to your treaty

and your land rights,

but when it comes to other people's property...

We're dealing with a deprived kid here.

Oh, I know plenty about deprived kids.

I was one

and I didn't steal.

Dad, I don't think we need to call the police. We found the phone.

No, but what about the rest of us?

We don't want to share our campsite with a thief.

Well if you won't call them, I will.

I stole it!

I stole it, Gramps, and I gave it to that kid.

Ruby, darling, I know you want to help him

but you hardly know him.

I didn't steal it for him.

I stole it because you're a bitch!

You get a brand new iPhone and I get Gramp's old Nokia.

I gave the phone to him because I could see

that he wanted it and we stole his country

and... And Gramp's is a racist!

Ruby!

You are so grounded when you get home.

Um...

Sorry, can I grab the... Yeah.

Thank you.

So.

You still gonna call the cops?

Have the little white girl arrested?

No?

I thought not.

Well it looks like us mob'll have to share the campsite with a thief.

Nothing to see here.

Come on, boys.

I think maybe you should have let that kid keep your phone.

What's that, Dad?

Oh, I've just been sitting here

having a bit of a look at myself as well.

I thought maybe you should too.

Mind you, you can't see yourself

if you're staring at your bloody phone, can ya?

♪ Jack took two pistols from his belt

Hey Roland!

♪ He proudly waved them high

♪ I'll fight but not surrender cried

♪ That wild colonial guy

♪ Whoo!

Can we get a photo? Sorry.

Stop, stop, stop!

Watch the gig.

I'm sorry, for any of you trying to enjoy our poor old-fashioned

little gig, but there is a techno urban folk funk

dog washer up the back,

doing selfies with his fans.

Now this is Whiskey In The Jar.

I thought perhaps we might go and see a bit of music later.

Really?

That's not like us.

But something different could be nice.

Yeah, but different isn't always a good thing.

I tell you what.

Why don't we have another botski while we decide?

Hey!

I'm going to give my voice a rest now

and pass you over to my Da,

Eamon O'Reilly.

Thanks, Keevey.

I'd like to sing you a little song that was...

Might have been written many years ago but I've always felt that it was

kind of written just for me.

You see, I met my beautiful wife, Mary,

when she was just sixteen.

And I lost her when our lovely daughter Keevey

was the same age.

So, this is my favorite song in all the world,

which is funny, because

it always breaks my heart.

♪ When first I saw The love light in your eyes

♪ I thought that life Held not the joy

♪ For me

♪ Although we may have Drifted far apart

♪ I never dreamed But what I dream I feel

♪ I love you As I've never loved before

♪ Since first I saw you On the village green

♪ Come to me Or my dream of love is o'er

♪ I love you As I love you

♪ When you were sweet

♪ When you were sweet

♪ Sixteen

- Piss off, son. - I just wanna talk to her.

Listen mate, she doesn't want to see you, all right?

She's not interested in your or your academy bullshit.

I don't care that the academy didn't get it.

I think Keevey's good enough to...

Oh, she's good enough.

Good enough for what she wants to be

and way too good for a pretentious little bum fluff hipster like you.

At least the blokes who normally pester her have got some balls

and they don't slag her off for not being Stéphane fucking Grappelli, either.

Just keep away, Roland.

And if I see you bothering Keevey again, you'll regret it.

Hey dude. I'm Maddison. That's Indiana.

Can we talk to you for a second?

We have lots of Muslim girls at our school.

Some of the wear the headscarf, which like I respect,

but as a woman it kind of makes me feel uncomfortable about.

Hey guys.

Sorry, I just...

Rube, can I have a quick word?

What?

Oh, yeah okay. What?

I've turned it off. I've put it in the car.

Put what in the car?

My phone.

You're kidding. Are you ill?

No I'm not ill, I just... I'm sorry.

I know I'm always on it and I'm sorry...

It's okay.

No darling, it's not okay.

I want things to be different,

and you stealing that phone was making some kind of statement

I didn't steal it.

The dancing kid did.

Did he?

I just didn't think he should go to prison for it.

No no no, I... No, definitely not.

No, he... Anyway,

it doesn't make any difference.

The point is, I've turned my phone off, it's in the car,

and I would love it if we could do something together, tonight.

What?

Well, we're at a folk festival.

We could go and see an act.

We could take Gramps.

Yeah, okay.

- Sorry, I have to... - That's okay.

So that biddy didn't want to know, right?

She went off with her Mum, but that's okay.

I'm used to people not wanting to know.

You think she's hot?

I don't know.

Oh yeah, you do.

She's all right, too.

Me and her got a connection.

We can hook you up if you want.

It's a nice dream.

Dude, we're Aboriginal.

Dreams are real to us.

You girls are great.

You're really, really talented,

and music's always gonna be in your lives,

there's no doubt about that.

But you have to ask yourself, is it your vocation?

Is it the only thing you want?

Yes.

Then you have to make music for itself,

not because it'll get you a hit.

You have to know that even if

after a lifetime of playing, you never get that hit,

you'll still believe you made the right choice.

Wow.

That'd be so fucked up.

Yeah.

There's a band playing tonight, an Afghani folk band.

My guess is they're unlikely to ever get a hit and they probably know it,

but still, they play.

I can't believe the guy who worked with Koolaz

just showed me how to open tune a guitar.

He's such a dope dude.

It's like he really cared about our music.

He actually took us seriously,

and he didn't even try and hit on us.

Yeah, that was a bit weird.

Good evening.

My name is Baktash

and we are Umid from Afghanistan.

Umid is the Hazari word for hope,

and we humbly hope you enjoy our Afghan music tonight.

Three more jellybeans and I'm up another level.

Oh, that's nice.

Interesting article on the advanced vacuum distributor.

Hmm.

Red and white wristbands are required

for express glamping bathroom access.

White and red wristbands for the general purpose bathroom facility.

If the red part of the band is closest to the armpit,

then you are good for glamping.

If the white part of the wristband is closest to the armpit,

then you must only access

general purpose bathroom facility.

Is that clear?

- Ooh! - Ah!

Good to go.

Steady.

You've given us such a special night tonight.

What has been special for you?

Well, Queenie

we come from a place where there is no music,

no laughter.

A place where our freedom is oppressed,

where we are imprisoned without trial,

without hope.

My friends, we come from hell.

But the hell I described

is not the homeland we ran from,

seeking freedom and a better life.

It is in the land we ran to.

The hell I described is the detention camp

where we are imprisoned without hope.

We are forgotten.

We are dying.

I would like to thank Queenie

and the Westival organizers for arranging this concert

and the authorities for allowing it.

But above all,

I would like to thank my young friend, Jafaar,

for thinking of the whole plan.

Jafaar was just ten when he arrived in Australia.

He had lost his parents and his home.

When he came, he was

confused. He was alone. Was traumatized.

And Australia was

not kind to him, did not welcome him.

It put him in that camp.

I can see that our brief moment of freedom is over.

We must return to camp.

We've lost everything,

and we ask for nothing.

Nothing but the chance to begin again.

So please,

remember our name.

Umid. Hope.

We've never done that before.

No.

It's a change.

No, I'm sorry Jools, I don't want to do this.

Babes, we're right here. Come on...

No, I really I don't want to.

I thought I did, but I've changed my mind, okay?

Oh, you've changed your mind.

Okay, what am I? A pizza?

Why would you Tinder me if you don't want a root?

Swiping right isn't a contract, okay?

It is an expression of interest

and I have lost interest.

Oh, come on, babes.

It's too late to hook up with anyone else.

Let's just do it. It's fine.

I said no, Jools!

Now fuck off.

Hey, thanks for the great bloody evening,

in opposite world,

you prick-teasing bitch!

Hey!

That's my daughter you're talking to.

And what are you gonna do about it?

Yeah, mate?

Dad, stop it! Leave him alone.

Be careful, lad.

You're half my age but in a fight, what counts is experience.

Get out of here before he kills you.

Go on!

Dad, you can't just punch people out for being dickheads.

Really, love?

I thought that's exactly why you did punch them out.

I'm always going to be here for you, Keevey.

You know that, don't you?

Yeah I know, Dad.

Goodness gracious

another year, another Westival.

Back her in, back her in, back her in, back her in!

Tags, passes, keys!

So yeah, I just um,

pray for the strength to keep going.

My name is Smoko and I'm four hours sober.

To be clear, Smoko

four hours sober means four hours

consciously pursuing sobriety,

not four hours unconsciously shitfaced.

You do see the distinction?

This year we have another real community star to celebrate,

and guess what?

It's the Westival itself!

Yes, the Westival has joined numerous other great WA institutions

like Bumbles Hardware,

Rockmantle City Council

and the famous Académie Conservatoire

in going entirely paper-free.

Well done us.

I have two things to tell you.

Hey, I'm glad you shaved that beard off.

Wasn't a fan.

The Académie Conservatoire is paper-free!

I don't want to hear anything else about the Académie Conservatoire...

"While we accept initial applications by post,

all further correspondence will be to the email address

entered on the application form."

Is that one of the things you came here to tell me?

What email address did you supply, Keevey?

The WArrikins'. My Dad's.

It's the only one we've got.

Do you still carry that rejection letter with you?

You all know Henry of the Merry Morris Men of Olde WA.

What have you got for us, mate?

Well, Queenie,

we'd like to invite your listeners along to a very special show.

And let me promise you,

this is one Morris Dance you do not want to miss.

Not that you'd ever want to miss any Morris Dance.

Another Westival, another round.

I need to lubricate my picking fingers.

It's a great gig, isn't it?

Keevey, darling, will you have a beer?

Roland accessed your deleted emails, Da.

He doesn't know the password.

"thewarrikins," all lower case. I got it in one.

They accepted me.

They even offered me a scholarship. You deleted the email.

You forged a rejection letter.

And how can you do it?

You're my Dad.

I didn't mean to... I...

It was...

When I got that email,

I was so pleased for you, darling. I really was. And...

And uh...

And then... Then I got scared.

Keevey, I...

I didn't know what I'd do without you.

But you're all we've got.

You're all I've got.

What was the other thing?

What?

You said you had two things to tell me.

What was the other thing?

Oh right, well...

I was going to mention that I'm in love with you.

It's probably the wrong time.

Maybe a bit.

Your Dad did a terrible thing, love.

But he's a sick man.

He's a sick, lonely old man.

Hello, Keevey.

Didn't know you had a problem with drinking.

She's had a problem with drinking all her life, mate.

Yours.

Yeah well, things to do.

Well, Pam.

Can you help me?

Let's hear it for Henry Foreman

and Chief Squire of the Merry Morris Men of Olde England.

Thank you, Queenie.

Well this is a lovely little festival, isn't it?

We all meet, we all mix.

"Australia in a tent," as Queenie likes to call it.

You have all sorts of people come along to Westival,

with all sorts of stories.

Now take mine, for instance.

I didn't have the easiest start in life.

No, not complaining, you understand,

just... Just saying. And it made me who I am.

A fellow who even my mates sometimes find hard to like.

Who even my lovely grand-daughter sometimes

found hard to like.

I think the problem was that I was only looking at my own story,

as if it was the only one that mattered.

And then I started to have a look around,

at all the other people in the tent.

Like young Jessie here.

And Jafaar.

And I heard Jafaar's story and I realized

that it wasn't

all that different from my own.

What I reckon is

that unless we start listening to each other's stories,

we won't begin to understand our own.

So today in my capacity as Foreman

and Chief Squire of the Merry Morris Men of Olde England, WA,

I would like to honor and celebrate

the oldest Australian story of them all.

And I'd like to thank you, Jack...

For allowing me to share in your, uh,

your culture and your spirit.

I am seeking to contact one of the festival artists.

Kindly assist me.

I do not see a wrist tag, madam.

Health and safety regs require all visitors to have one.

Do I look like the kind of person

to allow my wrist to be tagged?

Well you will not have access to the portaloos.

I will not require access to the portaloos.

I would rather die.

Where I went to school, girls were taught to hold on.

Are you going to assist me or aren't you?

You look like a very smart, efficient, useful kind of girl.

Madam, how can I help you, madam?

That remains to be seen.

Hi.

Thought maybe you'd come by.

Well, no. I thought that you know...

You'd have a lot to think about, what with your Dad and all.

Well not really.

When he's been dry a year then we can talk.

I'm going to play tonight's gig and then after that,

he's on his own.

But guess who did come to see me?

Who?

Professor Wellborn.

- Ah, good. - She said she spoke to you?

Yes, I... I did. I hope that's okay.

Yeah, of course it is.

In fact, she, uh,

she still wants me for the scholarship.

That's great.

Yeah.

Well I told her I'd think about it.

You'd think about it?

Yeah, well you know, there's a lot to take in.

Besides, anyway, I mainly talked to her about you.

- Me? - Mm-hmm.

She told me all about

how you inspired her to audition for the Conservatoire.

Hello Professor Wellborn,

I didn't realize you were still here.

She wants to talk to you.

About what?

About music!

Keevey tells me that you love to talk about music.

And you can play it on ten different instruments.

Yes, Keevey, but there are ten people

that are better on each of those.

Maybe a hundred.

Not everybody can be the best.

But everybody can be the best that they can be.

But to achieve that, they need enablers, Roland.

Mentors and tutors who can

see their potential but have a passion for unlocking it.

She means teachers, Roland.

Come and work for me.

Unlock talent, enable passion.

You can start by convincing Keevey here to take up her scholarship.

Linda and I are leaving now.

But I will be expecting to hear from both of you.

Oh, don't disappoint me.

Do not disappoint her.

Linda!

Wow, I seem to be the object of some sort of

intervention.

Well yeah, it's a bit of a taste of your own medicine, huh?

Come on Roland, be a teacher.

It's what you do. Will you give yourself a chance?

I don't know.

Maybe.

Will you?

I don't know.

I mean, I think I want to.

Well you're gonna have to now,

otherwise, Professor Wellborn will set her girlfriend on me.

And then there's the other thing.

The other thing?

You said that you were in love with me.

And I was just really confused.

You know, it was...

It was so the wrong time and actually I'm...

I'm sorry because I... I shouldn't have said anything...

Roland, Roland, Roland!

I was confused because it made me realize that...

Well I'm...

I'm totally in love with you too.

Really?

Yeah, really.

But just... I was scared.

Why?

Because love is based on trust

and I barely know you.

You know, we've had one amazing kiss

and about fifteen massive fights

and we're just not exactly an obvious fit.

But the best harmonies never are.

Your lines are really improving.

I just don't want to get hurt, Roland.

I know what that feels like and it sucks.

I'd never hurt you, Keevey.

I... I love you too much.

I've loved you since the day you blew up my amplifier.

Just give me a chance...

To prove it.

Okay.

Would you please make welcome

the WArrikins and techno folk funk.

♪ There was a wild colonial boy

♪ Who left his native home

♪ And to Australia's sunny shores

♪ He was inclined to roam

♪ He robbed the rich He helped the poor

♪ He shot James McEvoy

♪ A terror to Australia was

♪ That white colonial boy ♪

And a real Westival favorite,

Diamond, is with us once again.

Do you have another treat in store for us, Diamond?

Yes Queenie, I do. A recitation.

Oh.

One hundred years ago, a very talented and strong woman

named Dorothea McKellar wrote

"I love a sunburnt country, a wide brown land for me."

Oh, wonderful inspiring poem, yeah.

Yes, well I think if she were writing today

she'd probably write something quite a lot more angry.

I hate a gender specific country

A land of sweeping bigots

Of ragged, transphobic Internet trolls

Of inadequate intolerant white men

And I've been taking guitar lessons with Tman.

Tman?

He calls him the Theraman because he plays the theremin.

See what he did with that?

Here we all are again, eh?

Yep, here we are. Good year?

Oh, absolutely.

We resaid our vows on the beach. It was so romantic.

Oh, we did ours again too!

Barefoot in white pajamas.

We were barefoot in white pajamas!

No! Oh, what? What? That's crazy!

Well, you know that funny old night we had last year.

Shook things up a bit.

Yeah!

Back to normal now, eh?

Oh yeah.

Well the quicker we get set up,

the quicker we can get stuck into the botskis!

Yay!

Don't even think about it.

Hey.

I'm Maddison, and I'm Feminasty.

This is quite a sad song, actually.

It's about regret, broken dreams and betrayal.

Mostly it's about betrayal.

I hate her lack of horizon

I hate her poison sea

Her bankers and her miners

A wide, shit-coloured land for me

Thank you, Diamond.

As ever, plenty to think about and apologies for the fruity language.

Binge drinking and anti-social behavior

will be met with zero tolerance.

Know your limits and drink responsibility.

Enjoy your night.

Microbrewed beer in the bar?

I don't recognize Australia anymore.

- Too hoppy. - Too fruity.

Don't want that much taste in a beer.

"A rich amber brew with hints of burnt grapefruit and vanilla."

It's a beer not a puddin'.

Thank you. You've been amazing.

Subtitles by explosiveskull