Original subtitles

Behold, Sister Pantagog.

I've scoured the Ten Seas

and found our Dice of Destiny.

At last, Brother Gargantamog.

Now we are one step closer to resuming our game of fates.

After you find where we left the activation scroll

and bring some more schmetzels.

Aw. You ate all the schmetzels?

Those were for the game!

They were going stale, Gargantamog. Stale!

Go on, I'll hang onto the dice.

Oh, no, you don't. I found it.

A shooting star!

Make a wish, Bo. Hmm?

I wish it wasn't getting so close.

So you saw a star rock?

Or are they called rockstar?

I really have no idea.

I skipped science and band practice.

And that's why you should stay in school, kids.

- Who are you talking to, Dad? - We're right here.

And that was a meteor.

Uh, that was no meteor.

I distinctly glimpsed a perfect polygon engraved

with strange patterns.

That was made by intelligent hands.

It's gotta be a Titan artifact.

Oh, you mean like those underpants we found

on the quest to find the Realms' worst smell?

Uh?

You remember what Admiral Lovejoy said.

"Any Titan artifact could be dangerous in the wrong hands."

We gotta get it to her no matter what!

Is it just me

or does that squeal scream Horatius Hoffenstance?

Help! A dozen of my guild's points

to any crew who'll rescue my home!

A dozen points?

I'm listening.

Uh, Dad, we gotta dig out you-know-what, remember?

Besides, HoHo will be fine.

He's already got three other beach houses.

Alas, no home is as sweet

as where I grew up and learned to count.

Aw...

...my first gold bricks.

Oh.

I could find a way to save HoHo's palace

and dig out you-know-what.

What you-know-what?

That's on a need to you-know-what basis, HoHo.

Now take your 12 guild points and get--

And give them to us.

We'll take your quest, Horatius.

Boreas, get digging you-know...

What?

Shh, I'm concentrating.

I'm no ordinary orc. I don't just dig.

I plan first.

Give me 72 hours...

We don't have that kind of time.

We're going to Flatrock

to pick up the best diggers in the Realms:

Bazuba and Gurlog.

Huh?

Bo, we finally get to quest

with your parents!

Smashing. But someone must stay

and valet my stuff and thangs.

Eeny, meeny, miny... Lana.

-Hmm? -12 points and a Titan artifact.

-Remember? -Ugh.

Flatrock,

the island of ice, rock, mines,

and orcs famous for their digging.

And a Titan artifact

that's way better than underpants.

Well, there's more to life than digging.

Oh, our little Bo-tato.

We missed you so much.

Ma, Pa.

I mostly go by Bo now.

I don't know.

Bo-tato's kinda catchy.

Bazuba, Gurlog, it's an honor to have you on my team.

I take it you got our flying fish message?

Yes, and it was delicious.

And we are so honored to go on a quest

with our little Bo-nobo.

Now, let's get our gear on board.

Maybe I ought to check my eye,

but aren't your shovels the same?

No. Every spade is a snowflake,

special in its own way.

This one's for gritty dirt.

This one's for dirty dirt.

This one's for partying.

This one's for formal occasions.

This one's lucky.

This one's unlucky.

Wait, why an unlucky shovel?

To keep us on our toes, of course.

Enough.

I mean, we're kind of on a time crunch here,

so pick your favorite shovel and let's get questing.

Please.

Come on!

Come on.

We haven't even cleared out the second ballroom.

Second ballroom?

But when have you ever had any balls?

My goons and I hold a cotillion every Sunday.

I may even invite you as a bonus for this quest.

I'll pass on the bonus.

We'll get one more thing, so pick carefully.

All right, we got two big quests in one,

so here's my ideas on how we get that Titan artifact

and save HoHo's palace.

Ooh, we're gonna need some brain food for this.

Hey, where have my snerks gone?

Whoops. Sometimes they like to hide.

Here, let me dig them out for ya.

The snerk ship is a-coming into port.

Uh, can we get back to me?

Well, of course, my little Bo-nana.

Those parents are way more fun than Bor...

Er, more fun than boring, is what I meant.

Yep.

Ma, Pa, we need to talk.

Oh, are you going to read us a bedtime story?

One with a mind map, please.

Sorry, not tonight.

We need to plan our quests.

Why plan when we can do what we always do?

We dig.

Digging isn't the solution

to everything.

Please follow my lead.

My crew is counting on me.

Oh, I don't know about this, Gurlog.

You know how Bo gets in over his head.

Like in orc-engarten,

when he tried to fix a water fountain

and turned all the toilets into geysers.

His teacher had to take early retirement.

But our Bo's a big boy now.

He knows what he's doing.

I'm sure it's here somewhere.

Yes! Found it! Horatius Hoffenstance II.

Poor thing. You must be traumatized.

We risked our necks for HoHo... Ho?

Shh. Don't listen to her. She's cruel.

We gotta go.

But he needs a special comb.

Dad, you're just in time.

Me and HoHo barely made it out and...

HoHoHo? Wait, where did HoHo go?

How many HoHoHoHos are there?

Never mind. Orcs, do your digging magic.

No can do, Captain.

Our Bo-rito's got a much better plan.

Hello.

It's so nice to meet you.

Bo-rito?

Aw, I love it.

Just Bo, please. Simple, like my 532-step plan.

Step one, we drill a hole in the cliff

right above the artifact.

Two, we insert a giant magnet into the hole

that yoinks the artifact out of the cliff and...

Er, wait, we need a giant magnet.

Silly me. Back to step 1B.

Build a magnet. But first, I need to calculate

its magnetic field according to the... tides.

You okay, Bo-rito? Boreas.

No. Look at me.

I made things way too complicated.

Just like in orc-engarten.

How is Miss Orzul?

Oh, fine.

As long as she stays away from water fountains.

Ugh. Listen, I'm sorry I ignored your advice.

I was being... bone-headed.

Don't.

A little help digging me out of the hole I dug myself?

You got it.

Again? Oh, okay.

Permission to shovel?

Uh, that all you got?

Uh-huh. Bo asked us to bring only our favorite shovels,

so we picked the ones he made us in orc-engarten.

Aw, that's so sweet.

- But that's never gonna work. - Hmm.

Hmm.

Ooh.

Hmm?

I've got an idea. Greta, get your forging tools.

Slowly. Steady.

Lana. I found little Horatius' comb.

Wait, what's with the golden shovel?

Where's my gold?

You're all fired!

You're hired again. Help!

Okay, forget the artifact.

Stabilize the palace. I'll take care of HoHo.

Slide down, HoHo!

HoHo?

Come on. HoHoHo needs his papa.

Hot diggity.

That was some stellar shoveling.

We couldn't have done it without you, son.

And that giant golden shovel.

Aw, that's so sweet.

It almost makes me forget about the Titan artifact.

A Titan artifact?

Er... Oh, look how HoHoHo missed you.

Oh, you did, didn't you?

You're just the cutest, most handsome little thing.

This game is for mortal morons.

Your turn to find the dice.

Why? You lost it, Butterfingers.

Wanna play Go Fish?

Hmm-hm.