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This programme contains some strong
language and sensitive themes
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CAR HORN OUTSIDE
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SIREN PASSES OUTSIDE
4
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TRAIN RUMBLES
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00:00:23,800 --> 00:00:27,959
I was wondering if perhaps
you wanted to get some clothes.
6
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Er...
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Well, yes, I probably should.
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Good.
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This is �200.
10
00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:41,239
No, I can't take your money
as well as your hospitality.
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00:00:41,240 --> 00:00:44,839
Well, the hospitality's a gift.
This is a loan. I...
12
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No, you've done so much already,
I don't want to be any trouble.
13
00:00:48,200 --> 00:00:50,199
Well, have you got a bank account?
14
00:00:50,200 --> 00:00:51,359
No.
15
00:00:51,360 --> 00:00:53,319
Have you got any cash, money?
16
00:00:53,320 --> 00:00:54,719
Er, no.
17
00:00:54,720 --> 00:00:58,319
Well, I don't know
what your Bible says,
18
00:00:58,320 --> 00:01:01,920
but mine is quite explicit
about helping people in need.
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00:01:04,640 --> 00:01:07,079
My sons have moved out.
20
00:01:07,080 --> 00:01:08,719
My husband left me,
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I like having you here.
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00:01:10,760 --> 00:01:13,879
And if you find anything nice
for the Harvest Festival...
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Look, I'll drop something
at the church... No, no...
24
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I didn't mean for you to go. I have
no intention of being afraid of him.
25
00:01:21,520 --> 00:01:25,159
You're going to be OK, aren't you?
Mm.
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00:01:25,160 --> 00:01:26,540
Let's start with a question.
27
00:01:27,840 --> 00:01:29,640
What do you think a priest is?
28
00:01:30,720 --> 00:01:32,879
People who talk to God.
29
00:01:32,880 --> 00:01:35,279
Yeah, that's good. Um...
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00:01:35,280 --> 00:01:37,559
But I actually think anyone can talk
to God.
31
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That's what prayer is.
32
00:01:39,080 --> 00:01:41,839
A priest is the boss in church.
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I like that. Yes, we are.
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00:01:45,520 --> 00:01:47,999
Do you have a class representative?
35
00:01:48,000 --> 00:01:51,719
Someone who sits on
a committee representing the class?
36
00:01:51,720 --> 00:01:53,160
Angus.
37
00:01:54,800 --> 00:01:56,839
ALL LAUGH
Are you Angus?
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00:01:56,840 --> 00:01:59,559
On Wednesday, we have roast dinner,
39
00:01:59,560 --> 00:02:02,839
but Angus decided we should
have sausages instead.
40
00:02:02,840 --> 00:02:05,479
Did he talk to you about
that decision? No.
41
00:02:05,480 --> 00:02:07,719
Yeah! I did! No, you didn't!
42
00:02:07,720 --> 00:02:12,399
Would you consider you elected
him your representative leader?
43
00:02:12,400 --> 00:02:15,119
When it comes
to lunch menus, at least?
44
00:02:15,120 --> 00:02:18,559
Definitely. Definitely? Yeah?
45
00:02:18,560 --> 00:02:21,079
Right, well, I would say,
46
00:02:21,080 --> 00:02:24,599
what I do is spiritual leadership.
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00:02:24,600 --> 00:02:26,879
I don't decide
what we have for lunch
48
00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:29,439
but I do lead people,
49
00:02:29,440 --> 00:02:33,160
or try to,
in their prayer and their worship.
50
00:02:33,161 --> 00:02:36,759
And that's why I'm here today,
to talk to you about
51
00:02:36,760 --> 00:02:39,599
a festival we're going to
be running at my church.
52
00:02:39,600 --> 00:02:43,599
Who here has heard
of Harvest Festival? Me! I have!
53
00:02:43,600 --> 00:02:46,239
Good! And who can tell me
what it's all about?
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SCHOOL BELL RINGS
Thank you for doing that.
55
00:02:48,360 --> 00:02:49,839
Talking of business,
56
00:02:49,840 --> 00:02:51,999
were you able to give any
more consideration
57
00:02:52,000 --> 00:02:53,839
to my needle-exchange idea?
58
00:02:53,840 --> 00:02:57,279
Yes, Harvest Festivals,
needle banks...
59
00:02:57,280 --> 00:03:00,599
They did warn me that you were
radical when you came our way.
60
00:03:00,600 --> 00:03:02,839
It's just a small capital
investment. Hmm...
61
00:03:02,840 --> 00:03:06,799
Now this diocese is already running
three full-time food banks.
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00:03:06,800 --> 00:03:10,319
I think there are six part-time
ones, and the Deanery is...
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00:03:10,320 --> 00:03:13,439
Well, it's taken to opening its
doors twice a week as a warm bank,
64
00:03:13,440 --> 00:03:16,439
and there's countless outreach
educational groups.
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00:03:16,440 --> 00:03:18,799
OK, but those are all necessary.
66
00:03:18,800 --> 00:03:21,759
The diocese has
�53 million in funds,
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21 of which is cash in the bank.
Surely, we can find some...
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00:03:24,440 --> 00:03:28,479
How long have you been with us?
Is it two years? Three.
69
00:03:28,480 --> 00:03:30,439
Well, don't you think you ought
to settle in properly
70
00:03:30,440 --> 00:03:32,040
before you try taking on MY job?
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00:03:32,041 --> 00:03:35,919
Look, I know what happened
with this nun and, clearly,
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00:03:35,920 --> 00:03:37,799
clearly, there is no...
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00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:39,559
...no blame attached to you.
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00:03:39,560 --> 00:03:41,799
But it's not as if your copy book
wasn't already blotted,
75
00:03:41,800 --> 00:03:44,719
and now you're, you're digging into
our accounts? You've heard about...?
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00:03:44,720 --> 00:03:47,480
I never knew that she was so
flighty.
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00:03:49,120 --> 00:03:50,170
Silly.
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00:03:51,680 --> 00:03:52,920
Um...
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00:03:53,960 --> 00:03:55,399
I think there was...
80
00:03:55,400 --> 00:03:56,679
Um...
81
00:03:56,680 --> 00:03:59,999
It was confusion. Oh, there's no
confusion. She took a vow.
82
00:04:00,000 --> 00:04:04,160
And she didn't even wait to ask
for permission to leave.
83
00:04:06,600 --> 00:04:09,559
I did... If you want to find her,
I do know where she is.
84
00:04:09,560 --> 00:04:11,399
Well, we know where she is,
85
00:04:11,400 --> 00:04:13,159
but the Abbess, she wants,
86
00:04:13,160 --> 00:04:15,239
she wants her to stew a little.
87
00:04:15,240 --> 00:04:16,719
Oh, poor Anna,
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00:04:16,720 --> 00:04:18,950
she has absolutely no idea of
the real world.
89
00:04:21,840 --> 00:04:23,320
Good luck, David!
90
00:04:24,640 --> 00:04:26,159
Er, and thanks once again.
91
00:04:26,160 --> 00:04:27,559
Very kind of you.
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ENGINE STARTS
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BUSTLE
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MOTHER: Come on.
95
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Oh, sorry. I need to count your...
I'm sorry?
96
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I need to count your clothes.
97
00:05:49,400 --> 00:05:50,880
You need to count them?
98
00:06:20,880 --> 00:06:23,640
SHE SNIFFLES
99
00:06:31,440 --> 00:06:34,560
SHE SOBS QUIETLY
100
00:06:48,520 --> 00:06:51,320
Let me take this. Thanks.
101
00:06:55,560 --> 00:06:57,999
It's a recruitment drive.
102
00:06:58,000 --> 00:07:01,839
You've discovered a way
to recruit people!
103
00:07:01,840 --> 00:07:05,359
You love it! Admit it, you do!
104
00:07:05,360 --> 00:07:08,399
They get to feel charitable
about donating a can of beans.
105
00:07:08,400 --> 00:07:10,319
They remind themselves
they're Catholic,
106
00:07:10,320 --> 00:07:11,719
see the inside of a Church.
107
00:07:11,720 --> 00:07:15,079
They might even, God forbid,
come to the actual service.
108
00:07:15,080 --> 00:07:19,559
How many cans of beans do we have?
At a rough estimate, 467.
109
00:07:19,560 --> 00:07:22,879
I could fill the front three pews.
Or we could keep them
110
00:07:22,880 --> 00:07:25,959
and do that thing where we push you
down a hill in a bath full of beans.
111
00:07:25,960 --> 00:07:29,639
Well, I don't think that would do
your reputation any good at all.
112
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Especially now.
113
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It's all over the diocese.
114
00:07:33,680 --> 00:07:36,200
The pretty priest who
steals sisters.
115
00:07:39,440 --> 00:07:41,560
It's not my fault she's flighty.
116
00:07:42,680 --> 00:07:44,600
Oh, "flighty", is it?
117
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HE CHUCKLES
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00:08:08,440 --> 00:08:10,799
I brought home some food.
119
00:08:10,800 --> 00:08:12,439
Chinese.
120
00:08:12,440 --> 00:08:14,160
Cos I like it.
121
00:08:15,360 --> 00:08:17,200
I hope you like it.
122
00:08:19,560 --> 00:08:21,639
Pretty much like all food.
123
00:08:21,640 --> 00:08:22,999
How was your day?
124
00:08:23,000 --> 00:08:25,239
Urgh, not the best.
125
00:08:25,240 --> 00:08:27,079
We're overrun.
126
00:08:27,080 --> 00:08:28,359
Oh, I'm sorry.
127
00:08:28,360 --> 00:08:29,519
Yeah...
128
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Been overrun for years.
129
00:08:33,160 --> 00:08:34,400
So, what did you get?
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00:08:36,720 --> 00:08:38,320
Shopping, I mean.
131
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Er...
132
00:08:41,920 --> 00:08:43,359
Er...
133
00:08:43,360 --> 00:08:45,200
It felt a bit much, to be honest.
134
00:08:46,600 --> 00:08:47,960
Oh?
135
00:08:49,600 --> 00:08:51,599
We need a drink.
136
00:08:51,600 --> 00:08:53,879
But first I'm going to
get you some clothes.
137
00:08:53,880 --> 00:08:57,600
See, we didn't have mirrors
in the convent. Course, you didn't!
138
00:08:59,120 --> 00:09:03,039
And, well, I seem to have lost the
ability to look at myself.
139
00:09:03,040 --> 00:09:05,359
And yet, everybody else seemed
to want to look at me.
140
00:09:05,360 --> 00:09:09,639
It's almost as if I've forgotten
what I look like.
141
00:09:09,640 --> 00:09:12,279
Not that I think I'm still 16.
142
00:09:12,280 --> 00:09:13,959
You've got a beautiful face.
143
00:09:13,960 --> 00:09:15,359
No, no, no...
144
00:09:15,360 --> 00:09:18,439
It's not... It's not
a question of pride, I...
145
00:09:18,440 --> 00:09:19,559
Do you know, to be honest,
146
00:09:19,560 --> 00:09:21,879
I've got to admit, I don't like
changing rooms either.
147
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Everything had short sleeves.
148
00:09:24,240 --> 00:09:27,039
And the tops, the dresses,
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00:09:27,040 --> 00:09:29,159
and I just wanted something to...
150
00:09:29,160 --> 00:09:31,879
...to cover myself.
151
00:09:31,880 --> 00:09:34,159
What is it you want covered?
152
00:09:34,160 --> 00:09:37,759
Well, my arms and... and my legs.
153
00:09:37,760 --> 00:09:41,440
I mean, there were some
long sleeves but...
154
00:09:41,441 --> 00:09:44,959
It's not that I don't like
my arms, I mean,
155
00:09:44,960 --> 00:09:47,320
I don't really think
about my arms, but...
156
00:09:53,120 --> 00:09:54,879
I...
157
00:09:54,880 --> 00:09:58,720
I have never shaved my armpits.
158
00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:01,919
Oh.
159
00:10:01,920 --> 00:10:04,199
And everything felt very...
160
00:10:04,200 --> 00:10:06,119
Well, very exposing of that.
161
00:10:06,120 --> 00:10:07,600
And...
162
00:10:09,120 --> 00:10:10,960
I've also never shaved my legs.
163
00:10:13,400 --> 00:10:16,079
SHE GIGGLES UNCOMFORTABLY
164
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I am profoundly hairy.
165
00:10:18,480 --> 00:10:20,080
THEY LAUGH
166
00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:31,680
MOBILE VIBRATES
167
00:10:42,480 --> 00:10:43,880
Father David.
168
00:10:49,640 --> 00:10:52,359
Oh, hi. I was called to a
Gertrude Blaisey?
169
00:10:52,360 --> 00:10:53,920
Yes, of course, take a seat.
170
00:11:21,040 --> 00:11:22,640
HE SIGHS
171
00:11:38,560 --> 00:11:41,039
Thanks for coming.
172
00:11:41,040 --> 00:11:43,160
You're Lucy? Yeah.
173
00:11:45,080 --> 00:11:47,360
Um, thank you for ringing me.
174
00:11:48,760 --> 00:11:50,140
I care deeply about your mum.
175
00:11:51,480 --> 00:11:52,960
I've missed her at Mass.
176
00:11:54,720 --> 00:11:57,480
Went in every day, right?
That's right.
177
00:11:58,800 --> 00:12:01,000
Bet her confession was a blast.
HE LAUGHS
178
00:12:07,800 --> 00:12:09,480
Did she talk about me?
179
00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:14,560
I know you can't say.
180
00:12:20,720 --> 00:12:22,959
Wink for yes, maybe.
181
00:12:22,960 --> 00:12:24,320
HE CHUCKLES
182
00:12:27,000 --> 00:12:28,319
Gertrude was...
183
00:12:28,320 --> 00:12:32,479
Is very kind around the parish.
184
00:12:32,480 --> 00:12:33,600
She wasn't...
185
00:12:36,520 --> 00:12:38,040
I wasn't Catholic.
186
00:12:39,400 --> 00:12:43,239
She wasn't Catholic
when I was a child.
187
00:12:43,240 --> 00:12:47,440
She was when she was a kid,
but found being an adult more...
188
00:12:49,680 --> 00:12:50,800
...difficult.
189
00:12:52,360 --> 00:12:54,319
I'm guessing...
190
00:12:54,320 --> 00:12:56,640
...you two didn't always get on? No.
191
00:12:58,320 --> 00:13:01,160
She... liked to hurt.
192
00:13:06,840 --> 00:13:08,239
I'm sorry about that.
193
00:13:08,240 --> 00:13:09,600
I'm just...
194
00:13:13,040 --> 00:13:15,960
...pleased someone's forgiven her.
195
00:13:20,080 --> 00:13:21,920
FOOTSTEPS
NURSE:It's time.
196
00:13:29,640 --> 00:13:31,560
SHE SIGHS
197
00:13:34,680 --> 00:13:36,680
Lucy, would you come in with me?
198
00:13:37,960 --> 00:13:40,159
SHE SOBS
Uh...
199
00:13:40,160 --> 00:13:43,320
The Last Rites are something...
200
00:13:45,120 --> 00:13:46,360
...really quite beautiful.
201
00:13:49,240 --> 00:13:52,720
It's a celebration of the sacraments
of penance and viaticum.
202
00:13:54,160 --> 00:14:00,159
Viaticum is a Latin word
meaning provision and love
203
00:14:00,160 --> 00:14:02,120
for the next part of the journey.
204
00:14:04,280 --> 00:14:06,519
Viaticum,
205
00:14:06,520 --> 00:14:08,840
"With you on the way."
206
00:14:12,840 --> 00:14:15,239
SHE SOBS
207
00:14:15,240 --> 00:14:17,519
It's about faith, of course,
208
00:14:17,520 --> 00:14:21,520
but I think it's mostly about love.
209
00:14:24,240 --> 00:14:26,319
SHE SOBS
I can't...
210
00:14:26,320 --> 00:14:29,679
It doesn't have
to be about your forgiveness.
211
00:14:29,680 --> 00:14:31,240
I'm not challenging your anger.
212
00:14:32,240 --> 00:14:33,999
All that's asked for
213
00:14:34,000 --> 00:14:36,439
is your support for her penance
214
00:14:36,440 --> 00:14:38,080
and her journey.
215
00:14:45,240 --> 00:14:47,640
SOBS: I definitely support
her penance.
216
00:15:03,320 --> 00:15:05,880
Do you have anything to say
to me, Gertrude?
217
00:15:07,240 --> 00:15:10,239
If you're unable to talk,
just squeeze my hand,
218
00:15:10,240 --> 00:15:12,760
if you're sorry
for anything you've done wrong.
219
00:15:23,360 --> 00:15:24,919
I just...
220
00:15:24,920 --> 00:15:26,560
...want to say...
221
00:15:28,880 --> 00:15:31,000
Thanks, Gertrude. Thank you...
222
00:15:33,080 --> 00:15:35,119
...for being a really good friend...
223
00:15:35,120 --> 00:15:38,079
...me and to the community.
224
00:15:38,080 --> 00:15:40,280
I think we saw the very best
of you.
225
00:15:43,680 --> 00:15:44,920
I love you...
226
00:15:46,360 --> 00:15:47,680
...very much.
227
00:15:50,160 --> 00:15:51,800
SHE TAKES A DEEP BREATH
228
00:16:05,680 --> 00:16:07,759
God, the Father of mercies,
229
00:16:07,760 --> 00:16:09,919
through the death
and resurrection of his Son,
230
00:16:09,920 --> 00:16:12,039
has reconciled the world to Himself
231
00:16:12,040 --> 00:16:14,039
and sent
the Holy Spirit among us
232
00:16:14,040 --> 00:16:15,999
for the forgiveness of sins.
233
00:16:16,000 --> 00:16:17,959
Through the ministry of his Church,
234
00:16:17,960 --> 00:16:21,039
may God give you peace
235
00:16:21,040 --> 00:16:22,520
and pardon.
236
00:16:25,680 --> 00:16:28,759
I absolve you from your sins,
237
00:16:28,760 --> 00:16:31,159
in the name of the Father,
238
00:16:31,160 --> 00:16:33,159
of the Son,
239
00:16:33,160 --> 00:16:34,719
and the Holy Spirit.
240
00:16:34,720 --> 00:16:36,440
SHE WEEPS
241
00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:43,840
HE LAUGHS
242
00:20:04,200 --> 00:20:05,800
I don't like this.
243
00:20:10,000 --> 00:20:11,560
IMITATES EXPLOSION
244
00:20:34,040 --> 00:20:36,960
My name's David, I'm an alcoholic.
245
00:20:38,000 --> 00:20:39,199
GROUP: Hi, David.
246
00:20:39,200 --> 00:20:41,440
I'm also, as most of you know,
a priest.
247
00:20:43,000 --> 00:20:45,320
It's been a while since I've spoken.
248
00:20:47,080 --> 00:20:48,799
I was, in Reading,
249
00:20:48,800 --> 00:20:50,199
quite a big deal.
250
00:20:50,200 --> 00:20:52,679
I was given a lot of
responsibilities in the diocese,
251
00:20:52,680 --> 00:20:53,999
a lot for my age.
252
00:20:54,000 --> 00:20:56,839
There were those that said
I was to be the next bishop,
253
00:20:56,840 --> 00:20:58,160
quite a young bishop.
254
00:21:02,240 --> 00:21:05,279
There were a group
of kids I was counselling.
255
00:21:05,280 --> 00:21:08,600
Not all Catholics, but I was pushing
for a church that reaches out.
256
00:21:10,680 --> 00:21:14,399
I wasn't a trained counsellor,
but...
257
00:21:14,400 --> 00:21:17,760
...I'd done courses and I thought
the priesthood was social work.
258
00:21:19,960 --> 00:21:22,439
I... I thought this boy,
259
00:21:22,440 --> 00:21:25,199
I won't tell you his name, was...
260
00:21:25,200 --> 00:21:26,999
...being abused...
261
00:21:27,000 --> 00:21:28,280
...and...
262
00:21:29,800 --> 00:21:31,479
I was trying to help him,
263
00:21:31,480 --> 00:21:34,719
get him to admit what
had happened to him,
264
00:21:34,720 --> 00:21:36,200
how he felt about it.
265
00:21:37,360 --> 00:21:38,920
Things that I felt he needed,
266
00:21:40,440 --> 00:21:42,759
And he... he did tell me.
267
00:21:42,760 --> 00:21:44,360
He told me all sorts.
268
00:21:47,080 --> 00:21:50,160
It was his father... raping him.
269
00:21:54,680 --> 00:21:56,439
And...
270
00:21:56,440 --> 00:21:58,480
...the... the difficult thing was...
271
00:22:03,280 --> 00:22:05,679
The difficult thing was that
272
00:22:05,680 --> 00:22:08,560
he told me he thought he liked it.
273
00:22:13,880 --> 00:22:15,240
And then, he, uh... Um...
274
00:22:18,520 --> 00:22:19,920
He killed himself.
275
00:22:25,280 --> 00:22:26,440
It was very...
276
00:22:29,600 --> 00:22:30,720
...sad.
277
00:22:33,000 --> 00:22:34,800
No-one blames me, but...
278
00:22:36,840 --> 00:22:39,599
...people kept telling me
to pray and...
279
00:22:39,600 --> 00:22:43,079
...kept wanting to pray themselves
and I led them, that's my job,
280
00:22:43,080 --> 00:22:44,920
I led them in praying, and...
281
00:22:47,720 --> 00:22:49,920
...that's when I lost it.
282
00:22:51,600 --> 00:22:53,280
The ability to pray.
283
00:22:55,160 --> 00:22:57,559
I found I could only talk to God,
284
00:22:57,560 --> 00:23:01,199
I could only find God within myself,
when I drank.
285
00:23:01,200 --> 00:23:03,519
I found... truth.
286
00:23:03,520 --> 00:23:04,760
Solace.
287
00:23:08,720 --> 00:23:09,840
I don't know.
288
00:23:13,000 --> 00:23:17,280
And I took to starting
the day with a drink.
289
00:23:20,440 --> 00:23:24,079
You know, I'm... I'm not blaming it
on losing the kid,
290
00:23:24,080 --> 00:23:25,640
it was my own weakness.
291
00:23:27,040 --> 00:23:29,600
I'm not saying that was the reason,
but it was the...
292
00:23:31,040 --> 00:23:32,320
...trigger.
293
00:23:33,600 --> 00:23:34,760
Anyway...
294
00:23:36,440 --> 00:23:38,239
HE SIGHS
295
00:23:38,240 --> 00:23:42,560
...I was no longer talked of
as a future bishop.
296
00:23:45,640 --> 00:23:49,010
Someone saw what was happening and
I was taken away and treated and...
297
00:23:50,200 --> 00:23:51,520
...helped.
298
00:23:53,080 --> 00:23:55,199
And...
299
00:23:55,200 --> 00:23:56,680
...I moved in with my sister...
300
00:23:58,000 --> 00:24:00,400
...and found a new life.
301
00:24:02,200 --> 00:24:03,520
Here.
302
00:24:05,120 --> 00:24:07,320
It's rare for priests to move...
303
00:24:08,720 --> 00:24:12,040
...but Bristol was good enough
to welcome me and...
304
00:24:14,720 --> 00:24:16,400
...I felt I was doing good.
305
00:24:17,680 --> 00:24:19,120
Perhaps not good enough, but...
306
00:24:21,080 --> 00:24:22,320
...good work.
307
00:24:26,360 --> 00:24:27,639
But...
308
00:24:27,640 --> 00:24:29,319
HE SIGHS
309
00:24:29,320 --> 00:24:30,760
Lately...
310
00:24:32,440 --> 00:24:34,840
...things have become disturbed.
311
00:24:39,160 --> 00:24:42,080
And I...I... I guess I'm...
312
00:24:44,240 --> 00:24:46,040
...scared I'm going to...
313
00:24:54,320 --> 00:24:57,120
TEARFULLY: Right now,
I need a drink so badly.
314
00:25:28,560 --> 00:25:32,679
In the name of the Father and of the
Son and of the Holy Spirit.
315
00:25:32,680 --> 00:25:34,639
CONGREGATION: Amen.
316
00:25:34,640 --> 00:25:37,600
The Lord be with you.
And with your spirit.
317
00:25:39,480 --> 00:25:43,400
Lord, we have sinned against you.
Lord have mercy.
318
00:25:44,640 --> 00:25:45,960
Lord have mercy.
319
00:25:47,960 --> 00:25:49,760
Show us your mercy and your love.
320
00:25:51,120 --> 00:25:52,640
And grant us your salvation.
321
00:25:53,760 --> 00:25:56,359
May Almighty God have mercy on us,
322
00:25:56,360 --> 00:25:57,879
forgive our sins
323
00:25:57,880 --> 00:25:59,920
and bring us to everlasting life.
324
00:26:01,440 --> 00:26:03,640
Amen.
Amen.
325
00:26:16,720 --> 00:26:18,200
Er, welcome!
326
00:26:20,000 --> 00:26:21,239
Um...
327
00:26:21,240 --> 00:26:24,159
Welcome to something
a bit different!
328
00:26:24,160 --> 00:26:27,599
LAUGHTER
329
00:26:27,600 --> 00:26:31,239
Now the Catholic Church
is not known for its thieving,
330
00:26:31,240 --> 00:26:33,230
apart from all the things
we've stolen.
331
00:26:35,080 --> 00:26:38,679
But this today is
an audacious act of larceny,
332
00:26:38,680 --> 00:26:41,679
taking back from
the Church of England what is,
333
00:26:41,680 --> 00:26:43,879
in fact, a Catholic event.
334
00:26:43,880 --> 00:26:45,479
In fact, I'll go further.
335
00:26:45,480 --> 00:26:47,199
A Catholic embrace.
336
00:26:47,200 --> 00:26:49,959
A celebration not of plenty
337
00:26:49,960 --> 00:26:52,519
but of eliminating want,
338
00:26:52,520 --> 00:26:55,560
of giving and the understanding
of need.
339
00:26:56,920 --> 00:27:00,399
St Isidore, often called
the "Farmer",
340
00:27:00,400 --> 00:27:03,639
and our Saint of Harvest, said this,
341
00:27:03,640 --> 00:27:06,399
"When God's grace touches
our innermost minds
342
00:27:06,400 --> 00:27:08,639
"to bring understanding,
343
00:27:08,640 --> 00:27:12,119
"His word, which is received
by the ear,
344
00:27:12,120 --> 00:27:15,360
"can sink deep into our heart."
345
00:27:17,280 --> 00:27:18,760
Today's an act of love.
346
00:27:21,520 --> 00:27:25,239
And let's start by singing
hymn number 432,
347
00:27:25,240 --> 00:27:28,119
Come, Ye Thankful People, Come.
348
00:27:28,120 --> 00:27:30,400
ORGAN PLAYS INTRODUCTION
349
00:27:40,560 --> 00:27:46,119
? Come, ye thankful people, come
350
00:27:46,120 --> 00:27:51,679
? Raise the song
of harvest home... ?
351
00:27:51,680 --> 00:27:54,559
Well, that was a beautiful service.
Mm, yeah.
352
00:27:54,560 --> 00:27:57,040
You still fancy him though, right?
Mmm...
353
00:28:02,280 --> 00:28:05,079
I hope he didn't think
I got my hair done for him.
354
00:28:05,080 --> 00:28:08,560
You had a haircut,
you didn't get your hair "done".
355
00:28:12,040 --> 00:28:13,839
I felt so ashamed sitting there.
356
00:28:13,840 --> 00:28:15,400
Well, you shouldn't have.
357
00:28:18,680 --> 00:28:20,759
I felt...
358
00:28:20,760 --> 00:28:24,640
I feel like I'm ten years old!
Well, you're not!
359
00:28:26,000 --> 00:28:29,240
And I say that as someone
who's shaved your armpits!
360
00:30:09,280 --> 00:30:10,920
Dad?
361
00:30:12,840 --> 00:30:14,240
Your mother wanted a word.
362
00:30:17,800 --> 00:30:20,439
Who is he?
It doesn't matter.
363
00:30:20,440 --> 00:30:23,480
I'm not discussing him with you.
Why not?
364
00:30:24,760 --> 00:30:26,679
Because I don't want your judgment.
365
00:30:26,680 --> 00:30:29,319
26 years, just torn up, like that!
366
00:30:29,320 --> 00:30:30,800
That's not how I see it.
367
00:30:32,640 --> 00:30:33,919
I...
368
00:30:33,920 --> 00:30:36,999
I don't have to justifying
my choices to you.
369
00:30:37,000 --> 00:30:40,919
You just walked out on a job
for a man who won't look at you.
370
00:30:40,920 --> 00:30:42,679
How DO you see it?
371
00:30:42,680 --> 00:30:44,879
Did you come here just
to shout at me, Mum?
372
00:30:44,880 --> 00:30:46,799
You were 16!
373
00:30:46,800 --> 00:30:48,639
I told you it was a mistake.
374
00:30:48,640 --> 00:30:50,479
You were so sure,
375
00:30:50,480 --> 00:30:53,479
until, suddenly, you throw it all
away! All that work!
376
00:30:53,480 --> 00:30:55,079
"All that work"?
377
00:30:55,080 --> 00:30:57,399
You made a commitment.
378
00:30:57,400 --> 00:31:01,199
A commitment
which ripped my heart out.
379
00:31:01,200 --> 00:31:02,759
DOOR CLOSES
380
00:31:02,760 --> 00:31:04,799
Your dad's heart out.
And now, it means nothing.
381
00:31:04,800 --> 00:31:08,119
I made a commitment
which I...I do not regret.
382
00:31:08,120 --> 00:31:10,839
Of course, you regret it.
But now, I realise that...
383
00:31:10,840 --> 00:31:13,999
Now you realise you've thrown away
the best part of your life,
384
00:31:14,000 --> 00:31:17,240
and he doesn't want you back, right?
385
00:31:18,840 --> 00:31:22,440
You made this choice
and HE doesn't want you back.
386
00:31:24,360 --> 00:31:27,279
That's the thing you could
never understand.
387
00:31:27,280 --> 00:31:30,039
There's a point where you are,
as a woman,
388
00:31:30,040 --> 00:31:33,280
where we all are,
so beautiful, but now... I'm not.
389
00:31:37,680 --> 00:31:38,840
Go home.
390
00:31:40,280 --> 00:31:42,039
I needed to see you.
391
00:31:42,040 --> 00:31:46,440
You are making your problems mine,
Mum, like you always do.
392
00:31:48,160 --> 00:31:49,440
Go home.
393
00:31:51,080 --> 00:31:53,319
Don't remember the wrong things
from this.
394
00:31:53,320 --> 00:31:54,640
You've made your point.
395
00:31:56,720 --> 00:31:58,000
Go home.
396
00:32:18,760 --> 00:32:20,199
Hello, Father.
397
00:32:20,200 --> 00:32:21,560
Er, hello, Muriel.
398
00:32:22,600 --> 00:32:24,159
I was, um...
399
00:32:24,160 --> 00:32:25,679
I was wondering if, er...
400
00:32:25,680 --> 00:32:27,280
I could talk to...
401
00:32:31,680 --> 00:32:33,640
I wondered if you fancied a walk.
402
00:32:43,800 --> 00:32:45,560
I enjoyed your Harvest service.
403
00:32:46,960 --> 00:32:48,480
I was pleased to see you there.
404
00:32:49,760 --> 00:32:52,639
Surprised, if I'm honest.
405
00:32:52,640 --> 00:32:57,039
There's something basic, isn't
there, about the Harvest
406
00:32:57,040 --> 00:32:58,559
as a time for sharing.
407
00:32:58,560 --> 00:33:00,679
It was originally Catholic.
408
00:33:00,680 --> 00:33:03,559
Until Henry VIII, it was a Catholic
service, and the Irish...
409
00:33:03,560 --> 00:33:07,600
Yes, I think you mentioned
that... a few times!
410
00:33:09,520 --> 00:33:12,600
How long did it take you
to write it, the sermon?
411
00:33:14,680 --> 00:33:16,519
Depends why you're asking.
412
00:33:16,520 --> 00:33:17,959
I liked it.
413
00:33:17,960 --> 00:33:20,799
All the stuff about
the true nature of giving, I...
414
00:33:20,800 --> 00:33:22,719
I thought you gave a really...
415
00:33:22,720 --> 00:33:25,959
A true analysis of generosity
as an exchange.
416
00:33:25,960 --> 00:33:27,520
Ah, yeah. Thank you.
417
00:33:29,000 --> 00:33:30,719
Um, I... I...
418
00:33:30,720 --> 00:33:34,079
I write them very quickly.
Often in the bath.
419
00:33:34,080 --> 00:33:36,200
And then, I revise them quite a bit.
420
00:33:38,160 --> 00:33:40,479
So, you write in the bath?
421
00:33:40,480 --> 00:33:43,359
Well, I actually dictate them
into my phone.
422
00:33:43,360 --> 00:33:46,199
I can hear the water moving
when I listen back.
423
00:33:46,200 --> 00:33:47,639
Oh!
424
00:33:47,640 --> 00:33:49,599
That's an odd image.
425
00:33:49,600 --> 00:33:54,400
Suppose there isn't a great deal
to do but think, when you're wet.
426
00:33:56,720 --> 00:33:57,880
No.
427
00:34:01,280 --> 00:34:04,279
My parents came to see me. Furious.
428
00:34:04,280 --> 00:34:06,239
About leaving your...? Yeah.
429
00:34:06,240 --> 00:34:08,319
I thought you said they weren't
especially Catholic?
430
00:34:08,320 --> 00:34:10,839
Well, my mum didn't want me
to become a nun,
431
00:34:10,840 --> 00:34:12,879
but here I am... Doing it anyway.
432
00:34:12,880 --> 00:34:14,759
Well, leaving,
433
00:34:14,760 --> 00:34:18,200
having ruined the best part of my
life serving something fruitless.
434
00:34:19,720 --> 00:34:22,279
You haven't ruined
the best parts of your life.
435
00:34:22,280 --> 00:34:23,920
If only you were my mother.
436
00:34:25,640 --> 00:34:28,199
My parents were troubled
by my choice.
437
00:34:28,200 --> 00:34:30,199
My sister thought it was great.
438
00:34:30,200 --> 00:34:32,719
Not like the good old days
when that third child
439
00:34:32,720 --> 00:34:34,639
would be stuffed off to the clergy.
440
00:34:34,640 --> 00:34:36,879
Think that's more of
an Anglican tradition.
441
00:34:36,880 --> 00:34:38,879
Do they come to your services?
442
00:34:38,880 --> 00:34:40,120
Ah, both dead.
443
00:34:41,400 --> 00:34:43,359
My sister's still around though.
444
00:34:43,360 --> 00:34:45,600
She's the natural daughter.
I was adopted.
445
00:34:46,760 --> 00:34:48,199
Oh...
446
00:34:48,200 --> 00:34:49,880
So, your parents were...?
447
00:34:51,920 --> 00:34:53,040
What, white?
448
00:34:54,400 --> 00:34:55,639
Yeah.
449
00:34:55,640 --> 00:34:58,439
Isn't it strange how that question's
always the first one people ask?
450
00:34:58,440 --> 00:35:00,839
Oh. Sorry for the boring question.
451
00:35:00,840 --> 00:35:04,039
It's not boring at all.
Just marginally... Racist.
452
00:35:04,040 --> 00:35:05,760
Socially telling.
453
00:35:10,600 --> 00:35:12,560
I don't want to have sex with you.
454
00:35:13,960 --> 00:35:15,160
Sorry?
455
00:35:16,280 --> 00:35:17,600
I, er...
456
00:35:19,440 --> 00:35:21,519
I don't know what this is,
457
00:35:21,520 --> 00:35:25,039
but I've kept thinking about it
and I just wanted to say,
458
00:35:25,040 --> 00:35:27,440
that I don't think I
want to have sex with you.
459
00:35:30,800 --> 00:35:33,199
Uh, OK...
460
00:35:33,200 --> 00:35:36,799
Or, well, maybe I do.
Maybe I'm just saying that to, um...
461
00:35:36,800 --> 00:35:38,639
But sex, the...
462
00:35:38,640 --> 00:35:41,839
...the idea of sex, but even when
you were talking about yourself,
463
00:35:41,840 --> 00:35:46,239
you know, in the bath,
actually, that didn't do it for me,
464
00:35:46,240 --> 00:35:50,999
because the idea of sex
is truly terrifying to me,
465
00:35:51,000 --> 00:35:53,079
as I'm sure it is to you.
466
00:35:53,080 --> 00:35:55,610
Er, I'm not even sure how
I even feel about kissing.
467
00:35:57,400 --> 00:35:59,679
I just don't know...
468
00:35:59,680 --> 00:36:01,000
...what this is.
469
00:36:02,680 --> 00:36:04,999
The way you make me feel...
470
00:36:05,000 --> 00:36:09,440
The way you made me feel
in an instant is...
471
00:36:11,360 --> 00:36:15,879
It remains something
I can't explain or,
472
00:36:15,880 --> 00:36:17,479
or even understand.
473
00:36:17,480 --> 00:36:18,800
Even now.
474
00:36:21,960 --> 00:36:23,599
It's something else.
475
00:36:23,600 --> 00:36:24,800
It's...
476
00:36:26,000 --> 00:36:27,919
...something more.
477
00:36:27,920 --> 00:36:29,240
So...
478
00:36:30,640 --> 00:36:31,880
...that's it!
479
00:36:35,360 --> 00:36:37,600
Now... Now, you have to talk.
480
00:36:40,400 --> 00:36:41,880
Um...
481
00:36:45,720 --> 00:36:47,440
I just wanted to see you.
482
00:36:48,640 --> 00:36:49,690
Why?
483
00:36:51,160 --> 00:36:52,959
Cos I like you.
484
00:36:52,960 --> 00:36:54,240
SHE SCOFFS
485
00:36:56,200 --> 00:36:57,680
What a safe word to use.
486
00:37:02,040 --> 00:37:05,039
I suppose I was worried about you.
487
00:37:05,040 --> 00:37:06,400
Of course you are.
488
00:37:10,360 --> 00:37:11,840
But, um...
489
00:37:13,200 --> 00:37:16,480
Thank you for the clarity...
490
00:37:18,840 --> 00:37:20,160
...about the sex.
491
00:37:38,560 --> 00:37:40,560
I don't want to have sex
with you.
492
00:37:43,360 --> 00:37:45,200
But I do want to hold your hand.
493
00:38:06,440 --> 00:38:07,840
OK.
494
00:38:11,440 --> 00:38:12,760
OK.
495
00:38:15,000 --> 00:38:16,760
My position hasn't changed.
496
00:38:18,520 --> 00:38:20,039
No, you're...
497
00:38:20,040 --> 00:38:21,719
Er, you're worried for me.
498
00:38:21,720 --> 00:38:25,079
You don't want to have sex with me
and you don't have feelings for me.
499
00:38:25,080 --> 00:38:26,959
Are you going to keep saying
the word "sex"?
500
00:38:26,960 --> 00:38:28,830
I know, now I've started
I can't stop.
501
00:38:33,040 --> 00:38:36,840
My promises are... everything to me.
502
00:38:38,480 --> 00:38:43,040
My service to God matters... to me.
503
00:38:45,160 --> 00:38:46,560
My feelings for you...
504
00:38:48,560 --> 00:38:51,200
...are ones of care and...
505
00:38:52,800 --> 00:38:54,160
...friendship.
506
00:38:56,120 --> 00:38:58,120
OK. Look, all I want to do...
507
00:39:01,280 --> 00:39:02,840
I want to help you.
508
00:39:05,760 --> 00:39:08,639
You know,
I threw my life up for you,
509
00:39:08,640 --> 00:39:11,599
and you can deny
responsibility, but I...
510
00:39:11,600 --> 00:39:14,079
Hang on, I'm responsible...?
Yes.
511
00:39:14,080 --> 00:39:16,719
Yes, you are.
And now, you're sat here
512
00:39:16,720 --> 00:39:18,879
like a... a wet pudding,
513
00:39:18,880 --> 00:39:21,959
and I feel like I'm the one who has
to make YOU feel OK.
514
00:39:21,960 --> 00:39:23,840
SHE SCOFFS
515
00:39:25,120 --> 00:39:28,439
I... I should go.
But you came to my service.
516
00:39:28,440 --> 00:39:30,959
Yes, I came to your church.
Why?
517
00:39:30,960 --> 00:39:34,120
To take part in a festival. Well,
it felt like you were... What?
518
00:39:35,720 --> 00:39:37,080
What?
519
00:39:42,600 --> 00:39:46,040
I'd hoped it was
an act of friendship.
520
00:39:47,440 --> 00:39:51,520
Well, it must be lovely to have
hopes like you've got. I...
521
00:39:54,200 --> 00:39:58,279
I want to be your friend
and "help" isn't a bad word.
522
00:39:58,280 --> 00:40:00,279
I want to support you in what
you're doing.
523
00:40:00,280 --> 00:40:01,720
I want to...
524
00:40:03,400 --> 00:40:05,720
I can't be THAT.
525
00:40:07,760 --> 00:40:09,680
But I can be...
526
00:40:11,560 --> 00:40:13,799
I'd like to be your friend.
OK.
527
00:40:13,800 --> 00:40:16,959
Well, I accept your friendship.
528
00:40:16,960 --> 00:40:18,599
You do? Yes. Thank you.
529
00:40:18,600 --> 00:40:19,719
Yes, I do.
530
00:40:19,720 --> 00:40:22,119
But... I am...
531
00:40:22,120 --> 00:40:24,920
I'm tired now and I want to go home.
532
00:40:27,760 --> 00:40:29,200
Do you even know the way?
533
00:40:30,440 --> 00:40:33,400
I've always been good at retracing
my steps.
534
00:40:35,880 --> 00:40:38,639
You know, I was sure,
when I became a nun
535
00:40:38,640 --> 00:40:41,319
and I am equally sure now.
536
00:40:41,320 --> 00:40:44,080
I just know that God's path
for me has changed.
537
00:40:45,800 --> 00:40:47,080
And I... I...
538
00:40:48,360 --> 00:40:52,400
I believe that God's path
for you has changed, too.
539
00:40:53,960 --> 00:40:56,639
Now, I am not some caged bird
540
00:40:56,640 --> 00:40:59,239
who saw a means of escape.
541
00:40:59,240 --> 00:41:01,200
I saw what you felt.
542
00:41:04,480 --> 00:41:05,800
And I felt it, too.
543
00:41:08,920 --> 00:41:10,560
I didn't imagine it.
544
00:42:05,080 --> 00:42:09,360
Subtitles by Red Bee Media
545
00:42:09,410 --> 00:42:13,960
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