All language subtitles for Bobs Burgers s16e14 Stuck In The Middle With Hugo.eng

? ?

Hey, Bob. Hey, Linda.

-[Bob and Linda] Hi, Teddy.
-Good Lord, I'm hungry!

I had to work through lunch
to finish a drywall job.

I thought I was gonna die.

Boy, do I need a burger
right now.

Uh, we ran out of burgers.

-What?!
-I'm just kidding.

Don't do that to me, Bob!

I'm hungry and fragile.
[sighs]

One Eggsit through
the Swiss Shop Burger, please.

Finally. Lunch.

I mean, it's 4:30 already.

It's almost an early dinner
at this point.

But it's not, Linda. It's lunch.

Dinner's a whole other meal

that I'm definitely still having
in two hours.

Are we clear?

-Yeah, yeah. Sure.
-Crap.

Is it already 4:30?
I'd better go.

Today's the last day
I can return the mini blowtorch,

and the store closes at 6:00.

Aw. You had fun with that thing.

And you never have fun.

Yeah. But I can't justify
the cost.

Mostly because
whenever I used it,

no one seemed to notice or care.

It kinda just tastes like what a
normal "to-mah-to" tastes like.

-Sorry.
-It's fine.

I just... I used a blowtorch.

Oh, my God. Why?

Forget it. I-I'm gonna go.

Okay, I'll be back
before the dinner rush.

And hopefully the kids
will be back soon

from wherever they went.

Eh, they said they were gonna
work remotely from the pier

and send us a Zoom link,
but I never got it.

Lot of chitchat today,
not a lot of cooking.

Okay, okay. Geez.

Hey, kids. Did you enjoy
whatever you were doing

while you were shirking
your duties here?

-Shirk did.
-How dare you?

I flush my doodies.

I mean, sometimes.

Yeah, not often. Bye.

-What were you kids doing?
-[door shuts]

We let Tina buy us stuff
at the gumball machines

-on the boardwalk.
-[mouth full] I got a giant gumball,

and it's hurting my jaw
quite a bit right now,

but I'm not gonna quit
and let the gumball win.

Oh, never mind, I am.
[spits]

And I got this temporary tattoo
of a turtle riding a skateboard.

Oh, it's gone.

That was really temporary.

And Jimmy Jr. gave me this ring.

-Ooh.
-I wouldn't say he gave it to you.

I mean, he handed it to me
and said something like...

Hold on to this, Tina,
as a token of our connection,

both emotional and physical.

[breathes loudly]

Here.

Uh, no, I'm pretty sure
he said...

Zeke and I are gonna go wrestle
on the beach.

Will you hold this for me and
I'll come get it from you later?

I don't want it
to fall out of my pocket

like what happened
with my Sacagawea coin.

Sure, but if you read
between the lines...

How's that burger coming, Linda?

No pressure, but my stomach's
starting to eat itself.

It's coming. Kids, can one
of you give me a hand in here?

On it. Better take
this baby off.

It's too gorgeous to be covered
in burger grease.

Eh, that's what I used
to think about myself,

but here we are.

Sorry I'm returning you,
blowtorch.

But we had some good times,
right?

[high-pitched] "Oh, don't
pretend you care about me, Bob."

What? I totally care about you.

You're great. You're-you're
just too expensive.

I-It's not you. It's me.

I'm...
[sighs] I'm poor.

"If I'm so great,
how come you never gave me,

like, a cool name?"

A cool name? Uh, okay, fine.

Uh, what about... Flamez?

With a "Z."

"Oh, that's good.
Can I tell that

to the next person
that buys me?"

Sure, go ahead.

"I hope they're hot.
Like me."

Ha. Classic Flamez.

"Yeah!"
[laughs]

[elevator bell dings]

Ooh, elevator.

Don't mind if I do.

[employee]
...as much as you nag us.

[Hugo]
I'm not nagging. I'm enforcing

-safety protocol.
Look, if I had... -Hugo? Oh, crap.

-...fire ants, I'd invest in a tube of caulk.
-Come on, come on, come on.

[employee]
You're a tube of caulk.

[Hugo]
I'm a tube of justice.

Damn it.

Ugh. Bob.

Hugo, I see you're busy
aggravating people.

Oh, and I see
you're walking around,

looking like a dumb slob,

carrying a bag of something
stupid, I'm guessing.

Well, this has been wonderful,

but I will now bid you

-a hateful farewell-
-[gasps]

Why did we stop?

I don't know.

Oh. Oh, no.

-Uh, this isn't good.
-[intercom beeps]

Hello? Is anyone there?

[repairman]
New phone. Who dis?

Um, I w... I'm in-

[laughs]
Just kidding.

Wh-What's the problem?
My system's telling me

you're at the mall.
A-Are you stuck?

-Uh, yeah, we are.
-Makes sense.

No one calls me to say how well
the elevator's working.

But don't worry,
I'll send someone

and we'll get you moving
in no time.

Okay, great.

I-I don't know
why I said "no time."

Sometimes it takes a long time.

-Oh.
-How many souls in there?

Two. If you count Bob.

"Souls"?

It's airline talk.

And elevators are like
the airplanes of malls.

Anyway, since there's two of you

and you seem to know each other,

you can keep each other company

during this potentially
very long wait.

[Hugo and Bob]
Oh, my God.

Ugh, I really wish
I had taken the escalator.

Ha. Bob on an escalator.

I literally can't think
of a funnier image.

What? What-what does that mean?

You, traveling
at a 45-degree angle?

I mean, come on.

This is a nightmare.

Oh, tell me about it, Bob!

Have you smelled you?

At least when Ron and I
inspect your restaurant,

the bad food odor
covers up your B.O.

Where is Ron? Did he quit?

No. He's taking a personal day.

He said he has appointments
and errands.

Oh. Is one of his appointments

with Dr. I Hate the Guy
I Work With?

How dare you?

I am Ron's mentor,

as I have told him
many, many times.

[repairman]
Hey. How's it going in there?

So, so great.

Um, is there an ETA
on the repairperson?

I'm just hoping
this doesn't take too long

for so many reasons.

Also, I have to return something
before the place closes.

"Ooh, I'm Bob.

I'm returning something."

I have to get
to places, too, Bob.

I need a new tie.

Oh, does Baby Gap sell ties?

You son of a bitch.

Just please tell
your repairperson

that this is an especially bad
stuck elevator situation

because the man I'm stuck with

is the most annoying person
in the world.

And please also tell them that
Bob's restaurant is disgusting!

I'll put it in the notes.

[Teddy]
Mmm.

Oh.

It's in me. I'm whole again.

Boy, I feel like I blacked out
there for a little bit.

Yeah, you were shoving it in
so fast,

it was like the burger police
were coming

and you had to destroy
the evidence.

At one point, it sounded like
you were speaking in tongues.

Leave Teddy alone, kids.

So he eats like a wild hog.
He was hungry.

Excuse me
while I bus my way back

to that meaningful
purple monster ring.

Tina's gone Gollum
with that thing.

I've never gotten all the way
through the movie.

Does Gollum turn back
into a real boy?

I don't know.

Where's my ring?!

It-It's not where I left it!
Where is it?!

Did you look on the floor?

Of course I looked
on the freakin' floor, woman!

-Tina!
-Now she's full-blown Gollum.

[straining] I'm gonna try
and lift the grill.

-Tina, no.
-[grunts] Ow, that's hot.

People are pointing, Bob.

They're pointing at us
and laughing.

Oh. Okay, those guys are.

Wait, those are
the food court guys. [gasps]

-I bet they did this.
-What?

It all makes sense.

This is no accident.

This is retaliation against me!

That's ridiculous.

They always say I'm too nitpicky
with my citations.

-Yeah, you are.
-Bah!

"Bah"? What's "bah"?

Like "bah, you don't know
what you're talking about!"

O-Okay.
Even if they wanted to get-

Buh-buh-buh! What? Spit it out!

Do you want me to say
what I'm gonna say?

-Not really.
-Okay, fine, I won't.

-Good!
-Then we won't talk.

Let's just sit here
with your mouth shut!

Mm-hmm.

Okay, fine,
say your stupid thought.

[sighs]
Even if they wanted to get revenge on you,

you think they'd know
how to stop an elevator?

Maybe the elevator repairman
is in on it!

Hugo, not everyone
is out to get you.

You're just being paranoid.

Paranoid? Or para-smart?

I mean,
if I'm being honest, Hugo,

I've definitely thought
about getting revenge on you.

I just don't know
where quicksand is.

Well, I have taken quicksand
and thick mud survival training,

so I would be fine!

Aah! Jimmy Jr. trusted me
with his purple monster ring

because I seem
like a trustworthy person,

but then I lost it
almost immediately!

Who's the monster now, huh?!

Who's the monster now?!

Calm down, honey.
You're freaking out.

Let's retrace your steps.

Or just trace our hands?
Make turkeys?

Okay, okay. I took off the ring
and I put it here,

and then Mom said, "Can you put
this egg on top of the burger

and walk it out to Teddy while
I fart near the back door?"

-Classy.
-So I put the egg on the burger,

then I brought it out to Teddy.

I gave him the burger
and then he ate it.

-Oh, my God, did the ring
end up under the egg?

-Did Teddy eat the ring?!
-What?!

No...

Teddy would know
if he ate that thing.

-It was huge.
-I don't know, Mom.

This is Teddy
we're talking about.

-Yeah, remember
when he ate that scrunchie? -Right.

-And when he ate
one of his earbuds? -Oh, yeah.

And the other earbud.

I mean, stuff
gets near the plate

and I just get confused!

So I guess it's possible
I ate the ring.

Oh, Teddy.

No...!

What are you guys up to?

[Bob]
Huh. Interesting. They're leaving

and you're wrong
about everything.

Of course they're leaving,

because they're on
to their next move.

Time to pull some strings.

I know someone at the Department
of Community Affairs.

They have jurisdiction
over elevator maintenance.

If our friendly "repairman"

is working
with the food court people,

this guy will be able
to help us.

[buzzing]

[groans]

Okay, he's not picking up.

Well, looks like
I'll have to interrupt

one of Ron's appointments.

? Da-da-da ?

? On a bicycle built for Ron. ?

On your left.

-Damn it!
-[repairman] Hello?

Oh. Uh, yes. Hi. Hello.

Uh, good news and bad news.

-Okay.
-I got this, Bob. What is the news?

Good news is,
turns out it's just a fuse.

Took him a little while
to figure it out.

These things can be a little
"con-fuse-ing." [chuckles]

Yeah, that's funny.
Um, wh-what's the bad news?

The bad news is, my guy doesn't
have the fuse that he needs.

But I've got one here and
I'm gonna drive it over myself.

I should be there in 20 minutes.

Or a bit more.

Depending on how long
it takes me to find my keys.

Oh, there they are.

Nope, that's my iPod Nano.

Oh, no. Couldn't your guy
just lower a ladder down

through the trap door
on the ceiling

-and then we could climb out?
-Okay,

you've seen too many movies.

Let me guess.
You want us to grab you

from the top of the elevator
and pull you to safety

right before it drops
to the ground and explodes?

-Uh, that's not-
-And then you ride off

spooning Keanu Reeves
on the back of a motorcycle.

-What-what movie is that?
-Listen,

there's way more liability
if we try to extract you

than if you just wait safely
in the car

until the elevator is fixed.

-Yeah, Bob.
-[sighs]

Repairman out.
See you souls soon.

-[intercom clicks]
-Huh.

The food court people
that hate you came back

and now they're carrying
a box and a crowbar.

[Hugo]
Crowbar. Probably to pry

the doors open above us.

-Uh...
-The box is probably a weapon box.

Full of weapons.

Why are they looking up here
so much?

Probably deciding which weapon
to use on which person.

-Oh, my God.
-"Oh, my God,

Hugo's right about everything
and I'm Bob and I'm an idiot"?

Is that what you're trying
to say?

Ugh, now I have to be trapped
in an elevator with you

while people are doing
a revenge on you?

-Well, I'm gonna eat the rest
of my tuna fish sandwich. -No!

Maybe there's
a perfectly normal reason

the food court guys
have a box and a crowbar?

Maybe it's one
of their birthdays

and they just got
a really bad pi�ata?

Oh, you're so naive.

You wouldn't know
a plot to destroy you

if someone spelled it out
on your greasy face.

Well, that's the great thing
about living a life

where I don't make everyone mad.

I don't have to worry
about plots to destroy me.

-Bah!
-Oh, no.

Where are they going?

That was such a sneaky walk.

-They slunk.
-They did.

Oh, my God, we're dead.

Dear Lord,
please let them kill Bob first.

Amen.

So, Teddy,
I need you to understand,

the stakes
have never been higher

for you to poop something out
as quickly as possible.

Jimmy Jr. could come get
his ring any minute.

I mean, I also just feel
like it's not good

to have one of those rings
inside me.

What if it's toxic or it gets
stuck in my colon forever?

Yeah, sure, all that stuff, too.

Geez, it's been, like,
five cups of coffee.

-Still nothing?
-Not yet.

Kids, stop trying
to make Teddy poop.

People's bodies aren't
a Play-Doh Fun Factory.

It's okay, Linda. I wanted
to have a ton of coffee.

Can you see my heart
beating through my shirt?

Just leave him alone, kids.

Sure. Sure. Got it, Mom.

We'll-we'll leave him alone.

Yeah, we're
not gonna leave him alone.

I-I think we need to step it up.

What's that stuff Dad drank
when he was constipated?

Ugh, not just Dad.

I've also had to drink
the poo brew.

That stuff's gross,
but it works.

What's it called?
Something mag-

Magnesium citrate.
I think there's still some

upstairs
in the medicine cabinet.

Whatever it takes.

Don't judge me if other
weird stuff comes out, too,

-okay, kids?
-Oh, we expect nothing less.

It'll be like in Jaws
when they cut open the shark.

I'll be right back. Cover me.

Okay, so I'm gonna go upstairs
for a minute to, um,

change my barrette.

I-I-I'm not really feeling
this one.

Oh, thank God!

Finally!

Okay.

Do you guys really not like
this barrette?

It's fine, Tina, just go.

Right, right.

[sighs]
Where are they?

I miss how it was
when we could see them.

Hugo, I hope you're thinking
about how much this is

your fault
and how awful you are.

This is not my fault.

I'm just doing my job.

I'm not the reason they have

fire ants crawling all over
their customers.

It's not my fault
their can opener

didn't meet
national food safety standards

and I had to impound it.

You impounded a can opener?

Big-time.
As you should know, Bob,

when can openers
aren't cleaned properly,

they harbor and spread
dangerous bacteria.

So, yeah, I'll impound
the hell out of 'em.

The food service industry
is a jungle.

So us food inspectors,
we're basically like Tarzan.

-What?!
-Tarzan, Bob.

Read a book.

Tarzan loved the jungle.

He wanted to live in the wild.

He kept it clean!

[sighs] I'm gonna blowtorch
through the glass.

-[thump]
-What was that?

Uh, hopefully the repair guy?

Hello? Hello?!

When people are revenger-ing,

they don't say hello.

They either say nothing
or they say "Revenge time."

Who ever says "revenge time"?

Revengers.

[Linda]
Kids, I told you,

leave Teddy alone.

Here's a BM
you should be interested in-

bussing m'tables.

Nah, this is more rewarding,
but thank you.

-[phone ringing]
-Tina, get the phone.

Uh, okay.

Bob's Burgers.

-Hi, Tina.
-Aah!

Uh, I mean hi, Jimmy Jr.!

Why did you go "Aah"?

No reason. Uh, what's up, buddy?

I was just calling to see
if you were around

so I could come pick up
my rubber monster ring.

I would have texted you,
but, as I'm sure you're aware,

you don't have a cell phone.

Uh-huh, uh-huh.

Did you know I collect
those monster rings?

-What?
-Yeah, since I was little.

Finally got the purple one.

Kind of a dream come true.

Thanks again
for keeping it safe for me.

Uh, yep, yep, super safe.

-Okay, see you soon.
-Okay, bye!

That was Jimmy Jr.

He's on his way to get his ring.

And it's the special purple one

that's gonna complete
his collection!

Oh, God, please let
the magnesium stuff work.

What? You gave Teddy
magnesium stuff?

This is
an emergency situation, Mom!

It's not the time
to have an ethics debate

about whether or not it's okay
to force someone

to drink medicine
so they'll poop out

a purple rubber monster ring,
okay?!

Tina Ruth Belcher.

[Teddy]
I wasn't forced to drink it, Linda.

I want this thing out of me.

I want my body back.

Use that energy. Poop that ring.

We believe in you, Teddy.

Poop like no one's listening!

Hi. Anything else for you?

Just the check.

-[thumping]
-Hello up there?!

[whispers]
Should we call the police?

I don't know.
It might be too late.

Oh, God. Should we just try
and get out of here?

-Uh, through the hatch?
-And then what?

We, uh, fight
whoever's up there.

On top of the elevator.

That's a terrible plan.

How would we even get up there?

Um... one of us
gets on all fours

and the other stands
on their back?

And since they're mad at you,

I feel like you should be
the one to fight them.

I will explain to them
why they're in the wrong.

Yeah. They'll like that.

Okay, climb up.
[groaning]

-Can't... quite... reach it.
-[groaning] Ugh, Hugo.

One inch away.
[grunting]

[sighs]
Crap.

Let's switch.

Oh, there's a lot of you.

What the? Fire ant!

Aah! Get off! Get off!

What? Don't shake it down on me!

Sorry! Uh, another one!

Sorry, I shook that one down
on you, too!

Aah! It bit me! It hurts!

-Ow! Ow!
-I think one just went down my shirt!

Aah! My nipple!

Ow! Vengeance is upon us!

-Ow! Another one got me!
-Ow! One bit me on my bald spot.

Ugh, I want to get down!

No! You got to get up there
and fight them.

It's our only chance
of survival.

Did I mention
I'm not great at fighting?

Oh, wow!
That's so hard to believe!

-Go!
-[sighs] Fine.

-[employees] Aah!
-And there you are.

[straining]
Okay, this is the part

where I pull myself up
and fight you.

But that's seeming hard.

Am I doing it?

This is bad. You said
we wouldn't get caught.

Hey, hey, hey. We won't.

There's no cameras around here.

Nobody saw us.

Except this guy.

But you'll be cool, right?

-No.
-Aw, man.

Bob, are you fighting them yet?

[grunts]
Can you be better at it?

Hold on!

Please don't pour fire ants
on us.

Especially on me.

Because I'm innocent.

I mean, can't we just forget
the whole thing?

Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no.
It is way too late for that.

Plus, he deserves it.

Every inspection,
all those ticky-tack citations.

And then blaming us
for the ants.

Those are not our fault!

That is a mall management issue.

That guy has made our life hell.

So now we fight fire
with fire ants.

Mm-hmm. Poetic justice.

We've been collecting them
to dump in his car.

And then the elevator broke.

I mean, it was an opportunity
we could not pass up.

But I'm in here, too,
and I didn't do anything to you.

Also, I'm like you.

I'm a restaurant person.

So you're gonna fire-ant
one of your own.

All right, well,
uh, how-how about this?

We'll pull you out
and then revenge back on.

Here, grab my arm.

[Hugo]
Bob! What the hell?

Why haven't I heard the cries
of our enemies yet?

[straining]

Wait. Wait, wait,
wait, wait, wait.

-[grunts] I can't do this.
-'Cause you're not strong enough?

No. I mean yes,
but just let me go.

-Aah!
-[Hugo] Ow!

It's like having a hairy piano
fall on me!

Look, food court people,

I just want to say,
Hugo also comes to my restaurant

and makes my life miserable.

-Hey!
-'Cause he's horrible

-and annoying and petty.
-[grumbles]

And just the sight
of his squished little face

-makes me so mad.
-Bob!

But as obnoxious as he is,

we do kinda need him.

I mean, all the rules
and regulations crap he does

keeps customers safe,
which is good, right?

So we can hate him and want
to dump fire ants on him

while he's trapped
in an elevator,

but we shouldn't actually do it

because, you know,
then we become the bad guys.

Tell them about how I'm Tarzan.

[sighs]
I'm not gonna do that.

So do what you have to do, but-

I can't believe I'm saying
this- I'd rather be in here

with Hugo getting fire ants
poured on me

than up there with you
doing the fire ant pouring.

Now if you'll excuse me,
I'm gonna go

cower in this corner over here.

Uh, me, too.

Why aren't they saying anything?

I don't know. I'm so scared.

I'm gonna tuck my pants
into my socks.

Oh.

-They closed the-
-Aah!

-Aah!
-Aah!

-Oh, my God.
-Aah!

-[elevator bell dings]
-Hey, look at you.

I knew you two
would end up friends.

Oops, look out.

There's a fire ant.
[grunts]

That was close.

Those things bite, you know.

-[Tina] Anything?!
-[Teddy] Nothing!

Nothing's coming out!
I-I'm sorry, Tina!

I'm so sorry!
I failed you! Forgive me.

How come that magnesium stuff
isn't working on you?!

Are you some sort
of superhuman?!

It's not the best superpower.

Aah! Jimmy Jr.'s gonna be here
any minute,

-and we don't have the-
-Hey, guys.

-Hey, Jimmy J. How's it going?
-[door shuts]

You good? You well?

Uh... yeah.

Good. Great. Good, good.

So, do you have my ring handy?

Yep. Uh-huh. It's so handy.

Uh, but, like, right now?

Or did you mean, um, later?

Well, now's good 'cause I just
talked to you on the phone

and I said I was coming right
over and I'm standing here.

I still can't believe I got
the one ring I was missing.

I guess magic does exist,
huh, guys?

So... where is it?

Uh...

It's really close.

Like, just a few feet from here.

Um, why are you all standing
by the bathroom?

We think Jason Momoa
might be in there?

Oh. Cool.

Um, so can I have
my ring now, Tina?

[sighs heavily]
Well, I have some news

that might be difficult to hear.

Jason Momoa is not in there.

Our handyman Teddy is in there.

And any second now,
he's going to poop out the-

Here you go, Jimmy Jr.!

Here's your finger thingy!

Oh. Thanks, Mrs. Belcher.

[satisfied grunt]
'Kay, bye.

Good luck with whatever you're
pooping out in there, I guess.

[Teddy]
Thanks so much!

[door opens]

-[door shuts]
-And I saved the day.

Where the hell
did you find it, Mom?

It was pinned between the table

next to the grill and the wall.

I tripped
and bumped into the table,

and it fell
and rolled right out.

You're lucky I'm a klutz.

Yep. You're Mr. Bean with boobs,
and we love you.

Oh, my God, thank you,
thank you, thank you, thank you.

You're off the hook, Teddy!

You don't have to poop anymore!
Ever!

[Teddy]
Thank God! Pressure's off.

Oh, wait. I think
the launch sequence has begun

and it cannot be disabled.

Oh, okay, Teddy. Okay.

-The rocket is rumbling!
-Okay, okay.

T-minus five and counting here!

We're stepping away.
Back up, back up.

-Hey, everybody.
-Hey, Bob.

-Daddy-o!
-Papa! -Hey, Dad.

So, guess who got stuck
in an elevator

at the mall with Hugo.

-Me.
-The mayor!

Oh, you said it was you.

-Yeah.
-Was it awful?

Yeah. But then it was okay.

It's a long story.

Also, I'm keeping the blowtorch.
I earned it.

Can you skip to why you're
holding soft pretzels?

Gimme, gimme, gimme, gimme!

The food court people
at the mall

gave them to me
as sort of an apology.

They took one look at you
and they were like, "I'm sorry."

There's ants all over them.

Oh, dear. Yeah, let's just toss
that bag in the dumpster.

I can eat around them.

Bob! You say you have pretzels?!

Can I have one?
Just shove it under the door.

? Who's the man
with the cleanest hands ?

? Impounding openers
of the can? ?

-? It's Hugo ?
-? Hugo ?

? Who's the guy
with the eagle eye ?

? Making sure people
eating your food don't die? ?

-? It's Hugo ?
-? Hugo ?

? Customer protector ?

? He's a hero health inspector ?

? Public safety he is guardin' ?

? And he's a little bit
like Tarzan ?

? Hugo ?

-? Aw, yeah ?
-? Hugo ?

? There goes Hugo. ?

[Tarzan yell]

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