Original subtitles

Max: This is my boss, Jonathan Hart,

a self-made millionaire.

He's quite a guy.

This is Mrs. H. She's gorgeous.

She's one lady who knows how to take care of herself.

By the way, my name is Max.

I take care of both of them, which ain't easy,

'cause when they met, it was murder.

No.

That's not bad.

That one?

Men are so difficult to buy things for sometimes.

A pipe is such a personal thing.

Darling, which one do you think, huh?

Uh, I don't think so.

No. That.

- Perfect. - Perfect.

Great.

- All right, George, we'll have this one. - Excellent.

Can't go wrong, Mrs. Hart. This is our finest model.

- Your father will be very happy. - I hope so.

Is he still at Briarwood in Maryland?

- Yes. - Now, if you'll just fill this in,

I'll see that that pipe gets mailed off to him right away.

Thank you.

George, do you have any cigars?

I didn't know you were into cigars.

Oh, it's not for me. It's for Max.

I thought we'd get him a bon voyage smoke

- for his vacation. - Ah, yes.

That is a nice pipe, darling.

These are from the Negril area of Jamaica.

The finest.

All right. We'll take those.

And do you have something else that's maybe, uh...

very special?

I think I have just the thing.

Perhaps the finest cigars in the world.

A friend sent them from Canada.

Canada?

I didn't know they made cigars in Canada.

They're Cuban pleasures.

What you might call the Lafite of cigars.

Ah, that sounds good.

Take a sniff of that.

Mmm! Nice.

Why do they smell so bad when they're burning?

Actually, you'll find that a cigar of this quality

has a rather pleasant aroma.

Oh.

How come these don't come in one of those metal tubes?

Interestingly enough, the really good ones don't.

But I'll fix this one up for traveling.

Unless, of course, you'd like the whole box?

Uh, I don't think we want to contribute

to Max's bad habits.

Just one, George.

Max: Three coffees, coming up.

Café à la Max!

Oh, that's wonderful.

- Great, Max. - Look at that!

I thought I'd give you a surprise.

- Cheers. - Cheers.

- Cheers. - Darling?

Mmm!

That is really good.

And now... we have a surprise.

- Now? - Now.

Max...

that is a round-trip first-class ticket

to Las Vegas plus five days

in the presidential suite at Caesars Palace Hotel.

Gee... thanks.

And also... Oh, and also...

we have a very special surprise for you from the smoke shop.

You like it?

Oh, this is great. A Cuban special.

I haven't had one of these since Carmen and I cha-cha'd the Caribbean.

No.

I'm not going to use this until after my killing.

When I light up this victory cigar,

everybody will know the game is over and I've won.

Well, in that case, Max, we wish you a lot of luck.

How'd you know I was going to Vegas?

I didn't say nothin'.

You always go to Vegas this time of year.

Jonathan: Monday morning, you leave at exactly 8:30.

And you stay precisely five days.

Your life is like an open book, Max.

You're predictable. Don't you know that?

Me, predictable?

Just like the sunrise.

Monday night, you'll call and ask about Freeway.

Tuesday night, you'll call and ask about Freeway and me.

Jonathan: And Wednesday, you'll call and ask

about Freeway, Jennifer, and me.

Yeah, I do that, don't I?

You certainly do.

But that's only three nights. What about the last night?

The last night.

The last night, you always call

and ask about an advance on your paycheck.

Jennifer: You're very set in your ways.

Yeah?

What about yesterday when you and I went shopping

and I got that mad craving for ice cream?

- You want me to guess? - Mm-hmm.

You asked for... pistachio...

covered with chocolate sauce and peanuts, right?

Well, I'm gonna pack.

Well, I suppose I didn't have to tell you that.

You knew that, too.

Do you think we overdid it?

I think he's a little upset.

Nah, I think he'll be all right.

He'll cool down when he gets to Vegas.

Predictable, huh? Sure, I'm predictable.

Where would we be without routine?

Nowhere, right?

I can't see anything wrong with a well-ordered life.

Do you?

Predictable.

All that time, I thought my life was in a groove.

Now it turns out it's just a rut.

Max, it's time you took charge of your life.

Hello? This is Max.

Put Freddy on the phone.

Ah, the smell of pancakes wafting in the air.

Uh, darling, go easy on me, will you?

I'm trying to cut down.

How about cutting out altogether?

Cutting out altogether?

No, no.

Monday is my day to have pancakes.

I always have pancakes on Monday morning.

I know, I know.

Max left me all the menus,

but I cannot find the pancake mix.

You don't think that Max might have hidden the mix

to get back at us for ribbing him, do you?

For telling him that he was predictable?

- Yeah. - No.

He wouldn't do that.

He knows how important your pancake fix is to you

on Monday morning.

Yeah, you're right.

Why would I think of something like that?

That's...

- Hey, I have an idea. - Hmm?

Why don't we take a spin down to Larry's

and have a little breakfast?

They have wonderful pancakes.

Well, not as good as Max's, but one has to be adaptable.

I think I'll have blueberry.

Mm, blueberry!

Yes?

Milton Charles here, United States Health Department.

It's imperative I see Jonathan Hart right away.

- Mr. Hart? - Right.

Milton Charles, Health Department.

How do you do?

What can I do for you?

Well, I'm afraid it's rather serious.

This is my wife Jennifer.

- How do you do? - This is Mr. Charles.

Oh, Mr. Charles, won't you sit down?

Please.

I'm afraid your life is at stake.

- My life is at stake? - How?

You were in George Weisenkopf's tobacco store on Saturday?

Yes, we were.

Well, I'm sorry to have to tell you

Mr. Weisenkopf died last night.

How terrible.

What happened?

He smoked a lethal cigar.

A lethal cigar?

A portion of the crop of tobacco used

to make that cigar was sprayed with a lethal pesticide.

Unfortunately, in some instances we arrived too late.

From your apparent good health, I've gotten here in time.

Jonathan.

From my apparent good health, but, uh...

I bought that as a present for the man who works for us,

and, uh... he has the cigar.

Where is he?

He's in Las Vegas.

Jennifer: He must have checked in by now.

I think we're fairly safe because he was gonna use it

for a special kind of a celebration.

He was gonna treat himself to the cigar if he won.

He likes to turn a card.

As long as you understand the seriousness.

This stuff is ruthless. Drowsiness, coma.

The chemical attacks the central nervous system.

Once that's underway... Can we call him?

Yes. Right now.

Is there an antidote?

If we catch them in time.

Darling, look what I found on the desk.

"Play me."

Max's voice: Hiya, Mr. and Mrs. H.

I've been thinking it over, and you two are right.

I am in a rut.

So I decided I ain't going to Vegas this year.

I'm gonna give up the desert for the sheltering palms.

Thanks to you,

I'm going to experience something unpredictable.

Oh, yeah, Mr. H., thanks again for the cigar.

It's very classy.

I gotta hunch it's really gonna change my luck.

Oh, my God.

I'm afraid your friend is going to need

all the luck he can get.

Jonathan: Right.

Yeah, that's right.

Okay, thank you very much. I'd appreciate it.

Now the police are gonna put an all-points bulletin

out on him, but they're not very encouraging.

Well, maybe someone in Max's phone book

will be able to help us.

You know something interesting?

Almost everyone in here is a woman.

Well, Max likes to live dangerously.

Oh, the auto mechanic called.

He said Max took the station wagon in

for a tune-up before he left.

He said he always takes it in before he goes to Las Vegas.

That means he didn't take the car, so he must've flown.

Which means he could be anywhere.

And smoking that cigar.

Not before breakfast, darling.

Oh, right.

What's that?

Oopsa-Daisy Florist.

Yesterday.

That's worth a shot. What's the number?

555-2842.

Four dozen roses.

Hello. This is Jonathan Hart.

That's right, Max works for us.

Yesterday, he sent some flowers.

It's very important that I know where he sent them.

Thank you.

She's looking it up in the book.

I'll write it down.

Yes. A Miss Mayerling.

140 La Mesa.

Santa Barbara.

Right, thanks... what's that?

How is Max enjoying Vegas?

You know that he goes there this time of year.

All right, thanks very much.

Everybody knows he went to Vegas but Max.

Mayerling.

Do you recall Max ever having a friend called Mayerling?

Never.

How much farther?

About an hour, I think.

Hey!

You wanna kill yourself?

Put that damn thing out.

I'm sorry.

Gonna blow us all up.

Lucky this is one of my regular smokes

and not my lucky cigar.

You'd be even luckier if you'd give them things up.

I didn't know this was an office visit, Doctor.

- Mind filling it up? - Sure.

Which way is the nursery?

Half a mile up the road, on your left.

You know, I can't says I'd peg you for the gardening type.

You got something to do with that flower show next week?

You could say that.

I'm planning to come out smelling like a rose.

Uh-huh.

Where's your, uh...

Where's my what? Oh, it's around the corner.

Can't miss it.

- Hi there. - Hiya.

- Fill it up, will ya? - Sure thing.

Want me to check under that hood?

- No, that's okay. Just the gas. - Sure.

All right, there you go, mister. That'll be $15.40.

- Here you are. - All right.

Wha... what, your change.

It's okay, keep it.

Well, hey, thank you!

All set?

Yep, that'll cost you $8.10.

Here's $8...

and 10 cents exactly.

Thanks.

What do you want?

I came to see the pasteboard exhibit.

Good luck.

Hey, Max.

Over here.

All right!

Glad you could make it, Max.

You're looking good. Looking good.

Here we go.

I think you know some of the guys.

- Roaring Tommy Ferrell. - Hi, Max!

Hiya, Tommy.

You and I played together in Atlantic City a few years back.

- That's right, yeah. - How you doin', Tommy?

Not so good. I've been getting hands that look more like feet.

- This is Mickey. - Hiya, Mickey.

How are ya, Max?

- Gary. - Long time, Max.

Haven't seen you since Vegas back in '75.

That's right.

This is Arthur.

- Hiya, Max. - Hi, Arthur. Nice to meet you.

- Nice meeting you. - And this here... this here is Big Sam.

Charmed to make your acquaintance.

Well, thank you.

I hope you feel the same after the game.

Gary here's the one that organized this little party.

I'm watching the nursery for my brother-in-law.

Lucky my bookie gave me Dave's number.

Hey, Max, you just caught me walking out the door.

I rode up last night with Roaring Tommy.

I wanna tell you, that's two hours

of "Irish Eyes are Smiling" off-key!

Hey, what is this, a tea party?

Come on, come on, you gonna deal or not?

We better not keep Mickey waiting.

After all, his poker-playing

is gonna put my kids through college.

Ho ho! No more, buddy, no more.

We got fresh blood in the game now.

Yeah, there he is. There he is.

A real transfusion.

Let me have 500 bucks' worth of chips.

Let me see how long that lasts.

Your luck's running like mine, about five minutes.

Take a look at that heater, will ya?

This guy must be real flush. I've heard about these.

That had to set you back a sawbuck.

At least.

This is my victory heater.

I don't light this up until I've cleaned

all you guys out, including the lady.

I don't see anything that looks like a dance studio.

- This is La Mesa. - There it is.

140, Ariska Mayerling Dance Studio.

Now I remember where I heard that name.

She used to dance with the Russian ballet.

Woman: Preparation one... two, three, four.

I battement.

Battement fondu.

Stretch.

Feet, feet, feet, point feet.

Fondu. Stretch arms.

Stretch.

And arabesque.

Hold, hold.

Terribly sorry to disturb your class.

I'm Jennifer Hart. This is my husband Jonathan.

- Oh. Jonathan Hart, yes. - How do you do?

Max has spoken of you both so often.

How is dear Max?

We were hoping you could tell us.

Has he run away?

Uh, not really.

You might say we've misplaced him.

Ah.

Yes, I think ofttimes myself the same thing.

Excuse me. Girls, please stretch.

Misplaced him, I mean.

Oh, yes.

He's very special.

He is to us, too.

And he may be in terrible danger.

How may I be of help to you?

The flowers that he sent to you.

Oh, Max is always sending me flowers,

but I have been away in Europe.

Next week, I have a birthday.

A few days, we have performance.

All kinds of reasons why Max would send flowers.

He is very dear.

I'm sorry, I don't know where he might be.

We'll go back into town

and check on some of his regular stops.

Thanks very much.

Please, Mr. Hart... find him.

He trusts you with his life, you know?

I know.

Take care.

Hello?

Yes, this is Mrs. Hart.

What?

I understand.

Is Max dead?

Oh...

Man: As far as we can tell, Mr. Hart,

your friend fell asleep at the wheel

just before the car crashed.

The police couldn't find his wallet.

They traced your name and address

through the rental forms in the car.

If it's any consolation to you, from my years of experience,

he didn't suffer any pain.

Death was...

well, he probably never even woke up.

Uh, Mr. Hart, only one person is required

to identify the body.

If you'd like... Thanks.

Sure.

Darling, you wait here. I'll be right back.

No, no, I'll go with you.

That's not Max.

Big Sam: It could be a straight flush.

And it could be a flush.

Or a straight.

And then it could be nothin'.

Big Sam: Come on, come on.

Are we gonna play cards or are we gonna play cards?

I don't think she's bluffin', Max.

- I'm out. - I think she's bluffing.

- I'm in. - So bet already.

Look, Sam, I've been waiting all night

to smoke my victory heater.

I think I got a chance now,

so give me some time to think it over.

Too bad about Dave tapping out so early.

Hope he makes it okay in the fog.

Well, it's nice he could drive Max's car down

and turn it in for him.

You know, he's a nice guy.

Doing me a favor. He saved me a week's rental.

Money you could be betting even as we speak.

All right.

I'll see your 50... and I'll bump you 100.

I call your 100... and bump you 100.

I was afraid of that.

Okay, I'll see you. I got a straight to the ace.

Sorry it had to be you, Max, but I really have it...

A gorgeous, blushing flush.

I almost had a royal flush.

Maybe I'll smoke you after the next hand.

Come on, mix 'em up and deal.

Mr. Hart, Mrs. Hart, sorry to keep you waiting so long,

but we've just had a positive ID on the body.

Who is he?

His name's Dave Rider. Name ring a bell?

Lived alone. No family, no relatives.

It's all we have to go on.

We're no closer to Max than we were this morning.

I'm sorry. We're doing everything we can.

Well, thanks very much, Lieutenant.

Well, again, I'm sorry.

Maybe I should make us some omelets.

Oh, no, thanks, darling.

You know that Max made me my first omelet?

He did?

He even taught me how to hold my fork right.

If it wasn't for him, I wouldn't be here.

I know.

You remember how I told you when we first met...

When he dragged me out of that bar

when the police were coming in the front?

Yeah.

He helped me open up my first bank account.

Then he knocked my ears back when I made a withdrawal to bet on a horse.

You should have seen the expression on his face

when I bought that bank.

Aw, that was something.

He took me to my first ballet.

I didn't know that.

He said, "Hey, listen, kid,

you gotta experience everything.

And besides, those dames have got legs that won't quit."

What a man.

What a man.

Well, as Max would say,

don't play all your cards until the bets are made.

And if we hadn't kidded him so much about being predictable,

he'd... he'd still be safe.

- That's it. - What?

Predictable.

Predictable.

Why didn't I see that?

See what?

We're not thinking like Max.

He's not off doing something else.

He's off doing the same thing somewhere else.

Of course.

He even said so on the tape,

something about the cigar bringing him luck.

He still intends to gamble.

Reno. Tahoe.

No.

Doesn't like the snow, too cold.

Atlantic City.

Too far.

A local game.

That could be anywhere.

We'll just have to narrow the odds.

How?

Freddy. His bookie Freddy.

He'll know where the action is.

- You know him? - No, I don't.

I mean, Freddy's always been like a telephone to me.

But one day, Max took me by his place

because he had to pick up some harvest.

I think I can remember where that is.

- Let's try it. - Right.

King high. Bet.

50.

I'm out.

I'll see you.

Pair of kings.

Hah, I knew it.

Lousy jacks.

I don't know about you guys, but I'm really beat.

Yeah, me, too. Hey, let's call it a night, huh?

You mean a morning.

How about a mercy round for the losers?

We've already had five of those.

I'm with Tommy.

I haven't had a decent hand all night.

One more, huh?

Seven card stud, no limit, everybody got a chance.

- No limit? - No limit.

Max, you're my kind of player.

Deal.

Give me a fresh deck.

Here you go, fresh deck.

Freddy.

Francussi?

Freddy Francussi, please.

Mr. and Mrs. Hart.

You know who we are?

It's good for business.

Won't you sit down?

Thank you.

You're Freddy Francussi?

Yes.

Somehow, I expected a guy.

That was Dad.

He retired to Florida and left me the business.

I'm Freddy Jr.

So, not what you expected?

No.

Computers and data links do most of the work.

It's just like Hart Industries.

Now, were you interested in a particular bet?

Football? Tennis? The ponies?

Polo ponies, of course.

We're not interested in making a bet.

What we need is some information.

We're looking for Max.

Well, isn't he at home?

He called me late last night

looking for some action in the area.

I thought he usually went to Vegas this time of year.

So did we.

Poker's not my action,

but I put him onto a guy I know.

Who was that?

Um... if I give you his number,

would you promise me not to tell him where you got it?

You have our word.

I'd hate to lose his account.

His name is Dave Rider.

Well, this won't be necessary because, uh...

Mr. Rider is dead.

Max, if you're in love with those cards,

you can marry 'em tomorrow, but for now, bet, huh?

You sure know how to get a guy.

It's what my Alfie always used to say,

may he rest in peace.

Well, my pair of fours are high,

but I'll check to the possible flush.

I'll check.

Possible flush bets 100.

I'm in.

- You in? - Too rich for my blood.

I'm in.

Well, I don't believe you.

I'll see that 100 and raise it 100.

That's 200 to you.

I'll see the 200... and raise 200.

That's 300 to you.

I'll see it.

- You in? - I'm in.

- 300 to you. - I'm in.

I'll see ya.

All right, now down and dirty.

Mickey: Yeah, make mine dirty.

What's the matter, Max? You got heartburn?

I not only got heartburn, I got club-burn,

diamond-burn, and spade-burn.

Well, my pair of fours are still high.

I'll bet 100.

I'll call your 100 and raise 200.

That's 300 to you.

I know it. I can count.

You?

I came to play.

I'm in. I'd 200, okay?

I'll see it.

Pot's ripe.

Full boat, aces over queens.

Thank you, gentlemen and ladies.

- Arthur: Golly. - Just a second.

Four little fours.

Mickey: Holy cow!

- Wow. Jeez. - Arthur: Jiminy.

Mickey: Now the heater?

- Now. - You've earned it, Max.

Allow me, Max.

A big smoke for a big winner.

Get a whiff of that, lady and gentlemen.

That is known as the sweet smell of success.

That's our only link to Max.

I hope the mileage can tell us something.

Hope so, too.

23,156.

That's about 40 miles.

Well, we're about 20 miles from L.A.,

so that leaves 20 miles in either direction.

One way or another.

That's too big an area.

Look at this.

The Blue Lagoon Motel.

It's a long shot.

Even long shots have got a chance.

Cheers, Max.

- Here's to ya, ya lucky bum. - Cheers.

You're lucky.

You were right about that cigar.

3,500 bucks. Count 'em.

Eh, that's okay.

Whoa! You all right, Max?

Who, me? Sure. A little sleepy.

It's past my bedtime.

It's past yesterday's bedtime.

Hey, listen, before we break up, you want some breakfast?

No, thanks, Mickey. I'll take a pass.

I'm headed straight for my motel.

Listen, why don't you take my car, huh?

I'll get a ride with one of the guys.

Be careful, though. It's not paid for yet.

Look, Mickey, we got the rest of the week.

Tonight you get lucky.

You can win yourself a Rolls-Royce.

Oh, sure.

Well, see you fellas later in the afternoon.

Hey, you almost forgot your cigar.

- Your lucky cigar. - Hey, that's right.

I can't leave without that.

This baby made my night.

- Gary: Take it easy, Max. - Tommy: So long, Max.

Here it is. Yeah, he checked in.

Then he called back maybe four or five hours.

Said, "Save my room," that he was definitely good for the booking.

- Did he say where he was? - Nope.

Was there anything about the call that sounded unusual?

Like what?

Something that might indicate where he is.

Just who are you people?

He works for us.

He's a friend of ours, and he's in a lot of trouble.

Did he say anything to you or give you any idea of what...

Well, he did say that he was having a good run,

and if everything worked out, maybe he'd buy the motel.

Either gonna rob a bank or he's feeling his beer.

Thank you very much.

He's obviously tied up in a private game.

And winning.

Maybe we should try a hotel in town.

Why would he play at a hotel in town

and stay in a motel out of town?

That's reasonable.

Jennifer: Stop!

- Did you see that sign back there? - No, I didn't.

It said, "The Sheltering Palms Nursery."

Max's tape.

What did he say?

He said, "I'm giving up the desert

for the sheltering palms."

It's up that road.

Hey!

The cops!

Hey, wait a minute. You don't understand.

I understand you're trespassing.

Hey, look, we got serious business here.

You got no business here.

Agh!

Come on.

Where's Max?

- Who? - Max! Where is he?

- You mean you're not the cops? - No, we're the Harts.

Max works for us. Now where is he?

Well, he just left.

As a matter of fact, I loaned him my car.

- He suddenly got very tired. - Did he smoke that cigar?

- Cigar? - Yeah, I gave him a cigar.

A special one. Did he smoke it?

Oh, yes. When he winned big, he lit it up,

just like he said he was gonna do.

Well, where did he go?

He went to the motel up on Highway 92.

- 92? Right. - What kind of a car was it?

Uh, blue Chrysler, four-door.

All right.

We're blocked. Let's borrow that truck.

Isn't that Max?

Jonathan: Yeah, that looks like the car.

Jonathan: He's swerving all over the road.

He doesn't recognize us.

Hey, Max!

Max!

Max!

Max!

Max!

Max, pull over!

Hang on.

What are you gonna do?

I'm gonna try one last shot.

Hold it, Max! Max!

Go easy!

Hang on.

Max!

Oh, Max.

It's all right, Max. We're here now.

Max?

Here's that cigar.

He couldn't have smoked much of it.

We'll get you to a hospital very soon, Max.

Everything's gonna be fine!

Hiya, Mr. and Mrs. H.

I won. Some luck, huh?

Yeah. We're all really lucky today.

Max, are you sure you should be out of bed?

- It's only been a week. - I'm fine, Mrs. H.

I was going crazy doing nothing.

Besides, you two guys are spoiling me rotten.

Are you sure?

Yeah, I'm feeling great. Sit down.

Breakfast will be right up.

What is today?

Today? It's Tuesday. Why?

Well, Monday is pancakes.

If it's Tuesday, it must be eggs Benedict.

- Ah. - Right, Max?

Nah. You know what I think?

I think you two guys are in a rut.

So today, I'm giving you English muffins,

poached eggs with a little hollandaise,

and some Canadian bacon.

Max, that is eggs Benedict.

Max, you're right.

I think that Mrs. H. and I should be more adventurous.

Don't you, darling?

Of course.

Yeah, you should be more like me.

All: Unpredictable.