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1
00:00:01,135 --> 00:00:03,137
*
2
00:00:17,651 --> 00:00:20,521
REBECCA: Hi, um, Dr. Akopian.
Rebecca Bunch here.
3
00:00:20,554 --> 00:00:23,424
So, Dr. Shin says
it's time for me to transition
4
00:00:23,457 --> 00:00:25,393
from outpatient treatment
with him back to you,
5
00:00:25,426 --> 00:00:28,396
so what do you say?
Our usual time on Thursday?
6
00:00:28,429 --> 00:00:31,465
Give me a buzz.
Buzz! Bee emoticon.
7
00:00:31,499 --> 00:00:34,268
Anyway, I'm feeling good,
ready to dig into all of it--
8
00:00:34,302 --> 00:00:36,337
abandonment issues,
dissociative episodes, my dad.
9
00:00:36,370 --> 00:00:37,838
It's all on the table.
10
00:00:37,871 --> 00:00:40,541
Let's get into it.
See you soon.
11
00:00:40,574 --> 00:00:43,844
It's happening. (sighs)
12
00:00:43,877 --> 00:00:48,449
Maybe this time,
it's finally happening.
13
00:00:48,482 --> 00:00:50,484
(sultry jazz music playing)
14
00:00:59,360 --> 00:01:01,562
* This session
15
00:01:01,595 --> 00:01:04,498
* Is gonna be different
16
00:01:04,532 --> 00:01:08,102
* It's gonna be so different
17
00:01:08,136 --> 00:01:10,638
* I know
18
00:01:10,671 --> 00:01:13,307
* This patient
19
00:01:13,341 --> 00:01:16,444
* Won't be indifferent
20
00:01:16,477 --> 00:01:18,646
* This time around
21
00:01:18,679 --> 00:01:23,551
* She'll want to grow
22
00:01:23,584 --> 00:01:28,556
* I've been burned
so many times *
23
00:01:28,589 --> 00:01:34,462
* By the girl who's committed
so many burn crimes *
24
00:01:34,495 --> 00:01:39,667
* Yet I never lost hope
or endurance *
25
00:01:39,700 --> 00:01:46,374
* Thank God I don't accept
health insurance *
26
00:01:46,407 --> 00:01:49,343
I charge $250 an hour now.
27
00:01:49,377 --> 00:01:51,412
* This session
28
00:01:51,445 --> 00:01:54,582
* Is gonna be useful
29
00:01:54,615 --> 00:02:01,355
* If she's truthful
about how she feels *
30
00:02:01,389 --> 00:02:03,624
* So I'll give it my all
31
00:02:03,657 --> 00:02:06,294
* With my requisite
therapist shawl *
32
00:02:06,327 --> 00:02:08,696
* Kiss my fancy degrees
on the wall *
33
00:02:08,729 --> 00:02:14,202
* For good luck
that it's gonna be different *
34
00:02:14,235 --> 00:02:16,637
* I can help her be different
35
00:02:16,670 --> 00:02:20,441
* Sweet Jesus,
it has to be different *
36
00:02:20,474 --> 00:02:23,277
* 'Cause if it's not
37
00:02:23,311 --> 00:02:28,649
* I freakin' quit.
38
00:02:28,682 --> 00:02:31,619
(sighs)
39
00:02:31,652 --> 00:02:33,187
Seems like
only yesterday
40
00:02:33,221 --> 00:02:35,423
I was right here
in this very room
41
00:02:35,456 --> 00:02:37,325
ignoring everything you said.
42
00:02:37,358 --> 00:02:40,261
* Crazy is when I go
off the rails *
43
00:02:40,294 --> 00:02:43,797
* This is what
you've done to me *
44
00:02:43,831 --> 00:02:46,234
* Crazy is how your loving
makes me feel *
45
00:02:46,267 --> 00:02:49,803
* This is what
I always want to be *
46
00:02:49,837 --> 00:02:52,540
* I like it when a girl
gets crazy in bed *
47
00:02:52,573 --> 00:02:57,345
* Don't mess with the bitch
who's crazy in the head *
48
00:02:57,378 --> 00:02:58,346
* You do
* You don't *
49
00:02:58,379 --> 00:02:59,780
* Want to be crazy
50
00:02:59,813 --> 00:03:01,449
* And you don't
* You do *
51
00:03:01,482 --> 00:03:02,716
* Want to be crazy
52
00:03:02,750 --> 00:03:06,554
* To clarify, yes, no
on the crazy *
53
00:03:06,587 --> 00:03:09,723
* We hope this helps.
54
00:03:09,757 --> 00:03:12,192
What?
55
00:03:13,461 --> 00:03:14,595
REBECCA:
Okay, so, uh,
56
00:03:14,628 --> 00:03:16,230
let me catch you up
on everything
57
00:03:16,264 --> 00:03:17,698
that's been going on with me
since I last saw you,
58
00:03:17,731 --> 00:03:19,733
which was post-suicide attempt,
59
00:03:19,767 --> 00:03:21,635
and I tried to get you
to give me a new diagnosis.
60
00:03:21,669 --> 00:03:24,372
Right, right.
Okay, so, to recap.
61
00:03:24,405 --> 00:03:25,573
I accepted the fact
that I'm borderline,
62
00:03:25,606 --> 00:03:27,275
did a lot of workbooks,
went to Buffalo,
63
00:03:27,308 --> 00:03:28,609
hung out with
my friend's dad,
64
00:03:28,642 --> 00:03:30,411
got back from Buffalo,
started dating Nathaniel,
65
00:03:30,444 --> 00:03:32,746
got a little too obsessy over
Nathaniel, so broke that off.
66
00:03:32,780 --> 00:03:34,348
Went on a ton
of hormones
67
00:03:34,382 --> 00:03:35,549
to give Darryl an egg,
68
00:03:35,583 --> 00:03:37,285
took over my firm
as senior partner.
69
00:03:37,318 --> 00:03:39,019
Uh, Nathaniel started dating
a new girl, Mona.
70
00:03:39,052 --> 00:03:40,120
That was three weeks ago.
71
00:03:40,153 --> 00:03:43,023
Nathaniel and I had sex
in the office we now share,
72
00:03:43,056 --> 00:03:44,091
decided that was a bad idea,
73
00:03:44,124 --> 00:03:46,460
it should never happen again,
and now I'm here.
74
00:03:46,494 --> 00:03:48,329
Wow. (chuckles)
75
00:03:48,362 --> 00:03:50,498
That's... a lot.
76
00:03:50,531 --> 00:03:52,766
Let's work backwards.
77
00:03:52,800 --> 00:03:56,570
So you and Nathaniel were
intimate, but not any longer?
78
00:03:56,604 --> 00:03:59,407
Oh, God, no, no, no.
No, no, no. That is long over.
79
00:03:59,440 --> 00:04:01,842
I mean, after we had
sex that one time,
80
00:04:01,875 --> 00:04:04,512
we only had sex, like,
three more times that week.
81
00:04:04,545 --> 00:04:05,746
And then we stopped.
82
00:04:05,779 --> 00:04:07,748
Except for last night.
83
00:04:07,781 --> 00:04:09,417
And this morning.
84
00:04:09,450 --> 00:04:10,518
But I don't
count this morning,
85
00:04:10,551 --> 00:04:12,420
because the janitor
opened the door
86
00:04:12,453 --> 00:04:14,555
of the supply closet,
so nobody finished.
87
00:04:14,588 --> 00:04:16,524
Except I'm pretty sure
the janitor.
88
00:04:16,557 --> 00:04:20,294
Are you okay with Nathaniel
seeing another woman?
89
00:04:20,328 --> 00:04:22,863
Listen, Nathaniel and I
are not seeing each other.
90
00:04:22,896 --> 00:04:26,334
Okay? What happened between us
was just a few mistakes
91
00:04:26,367 --> 00:04:28,636
in a-a room full
of office supplies.
92
00:04:28,669 --> 00:04:30,438
Okay? It's done.
93
00:04:30,471 --> 00:04:31,905
It's been hours.
94
00:04:31,939 --> 00:04:34,408
Or what time is it?
It's been 40 minutes.
95
00:04:34,442 --> 00:04:36,377
Rebecca...
L-Listen.
96
00:04:36,410 --> 00:04:38,746
The Nathaniel sex-- blah,
irrelevant. It's in the past.
97
00:04:38,779 --> 00:04:40,881
I'm here in the present
with you right now
98
00:04:40,914 --> 00:04:42,616
ready to rock my mental health.
99
00:04:42,650 --> 00:04:44,385
So, come on,
let's do this.
100
00:04:44,418 --> 00:04:45,353
Bunch and Akopes,
101
00:04:45,386 --> 00:04:48,656
back together,
tonight on CBS at 9:00 p.m.,
102
00:04:48,689 --> 00:04:52,560
solving crimes in different
climates around the world.
103
00:04:52,593 --> 00:04:54,662
I do not wish
to be called "Akopes."
104
00:04:54,695 --> 00:04:56,830
God, I forgot
how un-fun you are.
105
00:04:56,864 --> 00:04:58,832
MONA: (laughs) It was nice
to be invited, right?
106
00:04:58,866 --> 00:05:00,334
NATHANIEL:
No.
107
00:05:00,368 --> 00:05:01,935
Oh, my God. Wait.
You know Brian, right?
108
00:05:01,969 --> 00:05:03,136
Oh, Brian.
Mm-hmm.
109
00:05:03,170 --> 00:05:05,639
The bald sweaty guy in
your marketing department?
Yeah.
110
00:05:05,673 --> 00:05:07,541
So listen to this.
We were at a pre-meeting today
111
00:05:07,575 --> 00:05:08,476
for the fall rollout.
Hmm.
112
00:05:08,509 --> 00:05:10,478
And he took his shoes off
at the table.
113
00:05:10,511 --> 00:05:11,745
Oh, what?
Yeah.
114
00:05:11,779 --> 00:05:13,747
What? He-he just
took his shoes off?
115
00:05:13,781 --> 00:05:15,916
Took 'em right off, plopped 'em
on the conference table.
116
00:05:15,949 --> 00:05:17,050
I couldn't believe it.
117
00:05:17,084 --> 00:05:19,887
Babe, the amount of hair
on that man's toes.
Hold on.
118
00:05:19,920 --> 00:05:21,922
He wasn't wearing socks?
He was. The hair was
119
00:05:21,955 --> 00:05:23,657
poking through
the black ankle sock.
120
00:05:23,691 --> 00:05:24,758
Oh.
It was disgusting.
121
00:05:24,792 --> 00:05:27,528
It was like a porcupine
in a bag.
(laughs) God.
122
00:05:27,561 --> 00:05:29,397
I sent you a picture
this morning.
123
00:05:29,430 --> 00:05:32,500
You did?
Mm-hmm.
124
00:05:32,533 --> 00:05:33,967
Oh, I must have missed that.
125
00:05:34,001 --> 00:05:35,503
Oh, it's fine. I figured
you were busy or something.
126
00:05:35,536 --> 00:05:36,804
Yeah, no, you know, I was.
127
00:05:36,837 --> 00:05:38,639
I was busy... this morning.
128
00:05:38,672 --> 00:05:42,410
Yeah, I had a little bit
of a... crisis with the janitor.
129
00:05:42,443 --> 00:05:43,677
Oh, no. What happened?
It was real gross.
130
00:05:43,711 --> 00:05:47,848
He, uh... I-I caught him in the,
uh, supply closet masturbating.
131
00:05:47,881 --> 00:05:49,650
What?
Yeah, uh, alone.
132
00:05:49,683 --> 00:05:51,785
He was alone in there,
and I caught him.
133
00:05:51,819 --> 00:05:53,987
I caught him in there.
134
00:05:54,021 --> 00:05:54,822
That is so gross.
135
00:05:54,855 --> 00:05:56,724
In this supply closet?
Yeah. Uh-huh.
136
00:05:56,757 --> 00:05:59,393
Who would want to do anything
sexual in a supply closet?
137
00:05:59,427 --> 00:06:00,661
What is wrong
with people?
138
00:06:00,694 --> 00:06:01,962
I know.
(sputters)
139
00:06:01,995 --> 00:06:04,532
Yeah, I know, that is...
140
00:06:04,565 --> 00:06:07,668
People are disgusting.
141
00:06:07,701 --> 00:06:08,869
You take it.
No, you take it.
I got it.
142
00:06:08,902 --> 00:06:10,103
I don't want it.
You take it.
143
00:06:10,137 --> 00:06:12,673
Okay, can you stop
playing air hockey...
Why are you...?
144
00:06:12,706 --> 00:06:14,007
...with the snotty tissue?
145
00:06:14,041 --> 00:06:16,577
Knock it off!
Okay!
146
00:06:16,610 --> 00:06:18,412
We have work to do.
147
00:06:18,446 --> 00:06:19,547
Geez.
148
00:06:19,580 --> 00:06:23,917
Tim, I looked at your deposition
in the Crawford case.
149
00:06:23,951 --> 00:06:25,919
One word: blurghh.
150
00:06:25,953 --> 00:06:27,688
Can we take another
crack at that?
151
00:06:27,721 --> 00:06:30,190
Come on, it's fine.
We can show Nathaniel.
152
00:06:30,223 --> 00:06:31,425
No, we can't. Jim,
153
00:06:31,459 --> 00:06:33,661
for your hearing next week, I
rewrote your opening arguments.
154
00:06:33,694 --> 00:06:35,929
I thought you might want
to win a case for a change.
155
00:06:35,963 --> 00:06:38,599
Well, you thought
wrong. Wait.
156
00:06:38,632 --> 00:06:40,834
MAYA: Paula, did you read my
notes on the land use meeting?
157
00:06:40,868 --> 00:06:43,737
I made them really thorough.
Did you show them to Rebecca?
158
00:06:43,771 --> 00:06:46,940
No. I gave her War and Peace,
because it was shorter.
159
00:06:48,041 --> 00:06:49,543
What?
160
00:06:50,911 --> 00:06:52,012
Oh, okay.
161
00:06:52,045 --> 00:06:54,047
Sue me, I want our
work to, like--
162
00:06:54,081 --> 00:06:56,016
I don't know--
not suck.
163
00:06:57,485 --> 00:06:58,852
Okay, well, I have
some good news.
164
00:06:58,886 --> 00:07:00,788
I came up with
a brilliant idea.
165
00:07:00,821 --> 00:07:02,523
You can all
thank me later.
166
00:07:02,556 --> 00:07:04,592
I've decided to call
for reinforcements.
167
00:07:04,625 --> 00:07:05,493
You mean the reinforcements
168
00:07:05,526 --> 00:07:07,027
that go in
the three-hole punch paper?
169
00:07:07,060 --> 00:07:08,796
I've been trying to get
in the supply closet
170
00:07:08,829 --> 00:07:10,598
to get those,
but it's always locked,
171
00:07:10,631 --> 00:07:12,800
and the door is making
a banging noise.
172
00:07:12,833 --> 00:07:15,603
I think there's a possum
and a cat in there,
173
00:07:15,636 --> 00:07:16,737
and they're fighting,
174
00:07:16,770 --> 00:07:19,607
but they're also best friends
and they solve crimes.
175
00:07:19,640 --> 00:07:21,008
It's just an idea
176
00:07:21,041 --> 00:07:24,512
for a CBS show I've been
(clicks tongue) kicking around.
177
00:07:24,545 --> 00:07:27,815
(gasps)
Okay, that is Sunil.
178
00:07:27,848 --> 00:07:29,683
He is a competent person.
179
00:07:29,717 --> 00:07:32,553
Do not get your lame juice
on him.
180
00:07:32,586 --> 00:07:34,622
He is really smart.
181
00:07:34,655 --> 00:07:35,823
As opposed to...?
182
00:07:35,856 --> 00:07:36,924
Yeah, all of you.
183
00:07:36,957 --> 00:07:38,258
Hi!
184
00:07:38,291 --> 00:07:39,960
(laughs):
Oh. Hey!
185
00:07:39,993 --> 00:07:41,595
I'm here.
186
00:07:41,629 --> 00:07:45,699
Oh, great. Now the sidekick's
got a sidekick.
187
00:07:45,733 --> 00:07:47,568
(sighs)
188
00:07:51,605 --> 00:07:53,507
Oh, hi.
Hey.
189
00:07:55,008 --> 00:07:57,611
I was, I was looking for these.
What do you call these?
190
00:07:57,645 --> 00:08:00,080
Do you call these flags
or sticky page holders?
191
00:08:00,113 --> 00:08:02,916
Oh, no, those-- I call those
"color thingies," actually.
192
00:08:02,950 --> 00:08:04,117
(laughs):
Color thingies.
193
00:08:04,151 --> 00:08:05,853
Yeah.
Oh, my God, that...
194
00:08:05,886 --> 00:08:08,856
that Stanford education, like,
gave you a great vocabulary.
195
00:08:08,889 --> 00:08:10,858
Well, it's why I'm so good
at games like Boggle.
196
00:08:10,891 --> 00:08:12,860
Oh, my God, I love Boggle.
197
00:08:12,893 --> 00:08:16,597
Well, you and I should, um,
play Boggle some time.
198
00:08:16,630 --> 00:08:18,866
Yeah. Oh, my God, Boggle.
Oh.
199
00:08:18,899 --> 00:08:21,101
(both moaning)
200
00:08:21,134 --> 00:08:24,004
Close the door. I want
to rip your pants off.
Okay.
201
00:08:24,037 --> 00:08:26,607
(panting)
202
00:08:26,640 --> 00:08:28,008
(both moaning)
203
00:08:28,041 --> 00:08:29,877
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
204
00:08:29,910 --> 00:08:31,612
This should never
happen again after this.
205
00:08:31,645 --> 00:08:33,581
Absolutely. This
is the last time.
206
00:08:33,614 --> 00:08:34,882
Okay.
Absolutely.
207
00:08:34,915 --> 00:08:36,550
I love this bra,
by the way.
208
00:08:36,584 --> 00:08:37,851
Oh, thank you.
209
00:08:37,885 --> 00:08:39,019
(both moaning)
210
00:08:39,052 --> 00:08:41,755
(door banging rhythmically)
211
00:08:41,789 --> 00:08:43,791
HEATHER:
Check this out.
212
00:08:43,824 --> 00:08:45,325
Yellowtail crudo.
Mmm.
213
00:08:45,358 --> 00:08:47,795
I'm thinking of rolling it out
at all my Home Bases.
214
00:08:47,828 --> 00:08:50,598
It's so tasty, and it pairs
really well with our chardonnay,
215
00:08:50,631 --> 00:08:53,634
which is, like, well, it's just,
like, the only one we have.
216
00:08:53,667 --> 00:08:55,636
Oh, wait.
Didn't the book say
217
00:08:55,669 --> 00:08:56,804
you're not supposed
to eat raw fish?
218
00:08:56,837 --> 00:08:58,038
Could be harmful
for the baby.
219
00:08:58,071 --> 00:09:01,074
Oh, yeah, you're right.
Totally. My bad.
220
00:09:01,108 --> 00:09:03,777
Got to take care
of that Darryl baby.
Ooh.
221
00:09:03,811 --> 00:09:05,913
God, I love my new hobby--
growing people.
222
00:09:05,946 --> 00:09:07,815
Wait. Did you hear that?
Did you...?
223
00:09:07,848 --> 00:09:09,883
Boop, made an eyeball.
What'd you do today?
224
00:09:09,917 --> 00:09:11,051
(laughs)
225
00:09:11,084 --> 00:09:12,185
God, I really can't believe it.
226
00:09:12,219 --> 00:09:15,155
I got my life together in
a really short amount of time.
227
00:09:15,188 --> 00:09:17,691
Like, making a human,
cute boyfriend,
228
00:09:17,725 --> 00:09:20,160
great new job,
and I'm, like, crushing it here.
229
00:09:20,193 --> 00:09:23,163
I mean, look at all these people
at my happy hour.
230
00:09:23,196 --> 00:09:25,165
So, Beth, how
did you find me?
231
00:09:25,198 --> 00:09:26,767
I like to know how new
clients hear about me.
232
00:09:26,800 --> 00:09:27,968
I actually came across
your website
233
00:09:28,001 --> 00:09:30,103
when I was looking online
for party planners in the area.
234
00:09:30,137 --> 00:09:31,772
I got to say,
235
00:09:31,805 --> 00:09:34,041
you actually look
like your photo.
236
00:09:34,074 --> 00:09:36,810
People never look
like their photo online.
237
00:09:36,844 --> 00:09:37,945
Oh, well, which one?
238
00:09:37,978 --> 00:09:40,080
Calendar, About Me, FAQs,
239
00:09:40,113 --> 00:09:42,816
Upcoming Events,
Past Events or Contact Me?
240
00:09:42,850 --> 00:09:43,851
God, you're funny.
241
00:09:43,884 --> 00:09:45,886
What?! Me?!
242
00:09:45,919 --> 00:09:47,721
I am so glad that I met you.
243
00:09:47,755 --> 00:09:49,089
My PR firm has
a ton of events
244
00:09:49,122 --> 00:09:51,091
coming up
in the San Gabriel Valley.
245
00:09:51,124 --> 00:09:53,927
I live on the Westside, I don't
have any contacts around here,
246
00:09:53,961 --> 00:09:56,129
but now I do.
247
00:09:56,163 --> 00:09:57,765
Yeah, you do.
248
00:09:57,798 --> 00:10:00,000
All you need to do is...
contact me.
249
00:10:00,033 --> 00:10:01,101
(both laugh)
250
00:10:01,134 --> 00:10:02,870
BETH: Contact you.
I'm gonna do that.
251
00:10:02,903 --> 00:10:04,237
I'm gonna contact you.
VALENCIA: Great. Yeah.
252
00:10:04,271 --> 00:10:07,140
So you're getting a free
vacation to Mexico. That's cool.
253
00:10:07,174 --> 00:10:08,776
It's not really a vacation.
254
00:10:08,809 --> 00:10:10,878
Uh, you get to ride a plane
and go camping.
255
00:10:10,911 --> 00:10:12,145
That's a vacation, bro.
256
00:10:12,179 --> 00:10:15,749
I'm building houses
for Habitat for Humanity.
257
00:10:15,783 --> 00:10:18,652
Oh, yeah, Happy Tats
for Manatees.
Hmm?
258
00:10:18,686 --> 00:10:20,721
Well, that's what
I used to think it was.
259
00:10:20,754 --> 00:10:23,857
A group that put tattoos on
manatees to, like, track them.
260
00:10:23,891 --> 00:10:24,892
It's not.
261
00:10:24,925 --> 00:10:27,160
I know that now. (scoffs)
262
00:10:27,194 --> 00:10:28,996
Do you?
263
00:10:29,029 --> 00:10:30,898
Anyway,
264
00:10:30,931 --> 00:10:33,867
feeling like I got to get out
of town for a little while.
265
00:10:33,901 --> 00:10:36,670
Feeling kind of
spun out lately.
266
00:10:36,704 --> 00:10:38,672
Little emotional.
267
00:10:38,706 --> 00:10:40,708
I think it's 'cause
everything in this town
268
00:10:40,741 --> 00:10:42,209
reminds me of Darryl.
269
00:10:42,242 --> 00:10:45,112
Wow, I've never seen you
like this.
270
00:10:45,145 --> 00:10:47,214
Hurt and vulnerable.
271
00:10:47,247 --> 00:10:48,682
I, like, really see
272
00:10:48,716 --> 00:10:49,750
your humanity.
273
00:10:49,783 --> 00:10:51,852
Yeah, see, so that sounds
a lot like "manatee."
274
00:10:51,885 --> 00:10:52,820
So that's on them.
275
00:10:52,853 --> 00:10:56,023
A lot of words sound
like other words, Josh.
276
00:10:56,056 --> 00:10:58,225
Come on, come on,
give me the dish.
277
00:10:58,258 --> 00:11:00,460
Okay. Tall idiot is Tim.
Mm-hmm.
278
00:11:00,493 --> 00:11:03,764
Short idiot is Jim.
Tiny idiot is Maya.
279
00:11:03,797 --> 00:11:06,867
SUNIL: They look like idiots.
(laughs) No, no, no.
280
00:11:06,900 --> 00:11:09,036
They look like a
Sunday matinee cast
281
00:11:09,069 --> 00:11:11,271
of an eighth year revival.
(imitates explosion)
282
00:11:11,304 --> 00:11:13,173
(laughs)
283
00:11:13,206 --> 00:11:15,042
Oh, Sunil.
284
00:11:15,075 --> 00:11:17,110
I never understand
your musical theater references
285
00:11:17,144 --> 00:11:20,247
because I was getting laid
and smoking dope in high school,
286
00:11:20,280 --> 00:11:22,750
but they still crack me up.
(laughs)
287
00:11:22,783 --> 00:11:24,952
Hey, thank you so
much for hiring me.
288
00:11:24,985 --> 00:11:26,086
Are you kidding me?
289
00:11:26,119 --> 00:11:28,021
No, you're-you're
doing me a favor.
290
00:11:28,055 --> 00:11:29,857
I am so glad you're here!
291
00:11:29,890 --> 00:11:32,125
(chuckles) It's gonna
be Sunil and Paula,
292
00:11:32,159 --> 00:11:34,962
you know, serving justice
around the world.
Mm-hmm.
293
00:11:34,995 --> 00:11:36,496
We're doing the
work of idiots
294
00:11:36,529 --> 00:11:38,966
and wearing cool suits and
occasionally sunglasses.
295
00:11:38,999 --> 00:11:40,167
(gasps)
Coming soon
296
00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:41,201
to CBS.
297
00:11:41,234 --> 00:11:43,503
Oh, nailed it.
(laughs)
298
00:11:43,536 --> 00:11:45,973
SUNIL: Good.
We could be cops or lawyers.
299
00:11:46,006 --> 00:11:48,776
PAULA:
We could. Okay, listen...
300
00:11:48,809 --> 00:11:51,178
So, I was thinking
about the Crawford case
301
00:11:51,211 --> 00:11:53,180
that we... What?
302
00:11:53,213 --> 00:11:55,849
I'm just wondering if they have
a walk-in pantry here.
303
00:11:55,883 --> 00:11:58,085
Nathaniel.
Hmm?
304
00:11:58,118 --> 00:11:59,186
No.
305
00:11:59,219 --> 00:12:00,888
We talked about it, okay?
306
00:12:00,921 --> 00:12:03,056
Those other times were mistakes.
It's not happening again.
307
00:12:03,090 --> 00:12:04,324
Right.
308
00:12:04,357 --> 00:12:06,760
Okay. I was thinking
309
00:12:06,794 --> 00:12:08,829
that when we get to the hearing
that we should...
310
00:12:08,862 --> 00:12:10,998
This a new top?
This a new blouse?
What?
311
00:12:11,031 --> 00:12:12,365
No, I've had it for a while.
312
00:12:12,399 --> 00:12:13,133
Looks good.
313
00:12:13,166 --> 00:12:15,869
Thank you. Thank you.
I like it.
314
00:12:17,170 --> 00:12:18,338
Right.
315
00:12:18,371 --> 00:12:20,040
(whispers):
Okay.
316
00:12:22,275 --> 00:12:24,845
They do have
a walk-in pantry, though.
317
00:12:24,878 --> 00:12:25,846
Really?
318
00:12:25,879 --> 00:12:26,980
Mm-hmm.
Why don't we pretend
319
00:12:27,014 --> 00:12:28,081
to work some more,
320
00:12:28,115 --> 00:12:30,951
meet there in five minutes,
take some clothes off?
321
00:12:30,984 --> 00:12:33,954
Okay. I'm gonna pretend to work.
322
00:12:33,987 --> 00:12:36,323
Watch me pretend
to work now. Okay.
Uh-huh.
323
00:12:36,356 --> 00:12:38,258
Yeah. Mm-hmm.
324
00:12:38,291 --> 00:12:40,160
Oh, good underlining.
325
00:12:40,193 --> 00:12:41,561
REBECCA:
Thank you.
326
00:12:41,594 --> 00:12:44,364
*
327
00:12:44,397 --> 00:12:45,866
(sighs)
328
00:12:45,899 --> 00:12:47,134
MAN:
Hey, Heather.
329
00:12:47,167 --> 00:12:49,136
The CO2 tank is out.
Oh, I'll get it.
330
00:12:49,169 --> 00:12:51,171
I got it.
331
00:13:01,081 --> 00:13:03,050
Heather, what are you doing?
You shouldn't be carrying that.
332
00:13:03,083 --> 00:13:05,052
Leave me alone!
333
00:13:05,085 --> 00:13:07,220
You're the reason I'm like this!
334
00:13:07,254 --> 00:13:08,922
That is not my baby.
335
00:13:08,956 --> 00:13:09,957
(mockingly):
That's not my ba...
336
00:13:09,990 --> 00:13:11,191
You could've stopped me.
337
00:13:13,360 --> 00:13:15,128
Oh. (sighs) I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
338
00:13:15,162 --> 00:13:16,296
I-I'm sorry I said it like that.
339
00:13:16,329 --> 00:13:18,131
I don't know
why I said it like that.
340
00:13:18,165 --> 00:13:19,166
I hate being pregnant.
341
00:13:19,199 --> 00:13:20,333
It's the worst thing
342
00:13:20,367 --> 00:13:22,202
I've ever decided.
I'm gonna quit.
343
00:13:22,235 --> 00:13:23,871
I want to quit.
344
00:13:23,904 --> 00:13:26,039
(whining):
I quit.
345
00:13:26,073 --> 00:13:28,041
Babe, come on.
You're almost there.
346
00:13:28,075 --> 00:13:30,277
No, I'm not.
I have another month.
347
00:13:30,310 --> 00:13:33,180
It's nine. It's nine months.
348
00:13:33,213 --> 00:13:34,414
Okay? It hurts to sit.
349
00:13:34,447 --> 00:13:36,016
It hurts to stand.
350
00:13:36,049 --> 00:13:38,085
My ass is covered
in stretch marks,
351
00:13:38,118 --> 00:13:39,086
as you know.
I know.
352
00:13:39,119 --> 00:13:40,187
My belly button looks like
353
00:13:40,220 --> 00:13:41,855
an inside-out butthole.
354
00:13:41,889 --> 00:13:43,090
No.
I still haven't tasted
355
00:13:43,123 --> 00:13:46,226
the crudo. I also, um...
I can't drink wine.
356
00:13:46,259 --> 00:13:48,896
I can't use my face wash.
I can't paint my nails.
357
00:13:48,929 --> 00:13:51,131
I can't take a hot bath
or get a foot massage
358
00:13:51,164 --> 00:13:53,400
or lie on my back
or fart without peeing a little.
359
00:13:53,433 --> 00:13:56,003
I can't do anything fun!
360
00:13:56,036 --> 00:13:57,070
We have fun.
361
00:13:57,104 --> 00:13:58,205
No, we don't.
362
00:13:58,238 --> 00:13:59,339
No?
I want to do this.
363
00:13:59,372 --> 00:14:02,075
Yes. I want to do this.
364
00:14:02,109 --> 00:14:05,112
Sign me up for this
and buy me a skateboard.
365
00:14:08,148 --> 00:14:10,017
A skateboarding expo?
366
00:14:10,050 --> 00:14:12,352
Uh-huh. My doctor said
that I can't ride a bike
367
00:14:12,385 --> 00:14:14,121
or, uh, skydive or surf,
368
00:14:14,154 --> 00:14:16,223
but he said nothing
about learning to skateboard.
369
00:14:16,256 --> 00:14:19,459
So that's what we call
a loophole, brah.
370
00:14:19,492 --> 00:14:21,294
JOSH:
It's obvious
371
00:14:21,328 --> 00:14:23,296
his name should be Dog Josh.
He looks just like us.
No.
372
00:14:23,330 --> 00:14:25,498
No, Josh. We're not doing that.
373
00:14:25,532 --> 00:14:27,467
Been through it a million
times. His name is Max.
374
00:14:27,500 --> 00:14:29,102
Found him in a garbage dump
in Mexico.
375
00:14:29,136 --> 00:14:30,237
He's been through enough
without also having
376
00:14:30,270 --> 00:14:31,271
to be named after you.
377
00:14:31,304 --> 00:14:32,472
I know what
that's like.
378
00:14:32,505 --> 00:14:34,041
It's not great.
379
00:14:34,074 --> 00:14:35,475
Geez, don't be such a baby.
380
00:14:35,508 --> 00:14:37,244
Look at you, little Dog Josh.
381
00:14:37,277 --> 00:14:39,046
Aren't you Dog Josh?
382
00:14:39,079 --> 00:14:40,180
Yes, you are.
383
00:14:40,213 --> 00:14:42,215
Yes, you are.
Look how much he hates that.
384
00:14:42,249 --> 00:14:43,250
(Max panting)
385
00:14:43,283 --> 00:14:45,418
Let it go.
386
00:14:45,452 --> 00:14:48,055
You know what, Heather did do a
great job with this renovation.
387
00:14:48,088 --> 00:14:49,990
I'm digging
the Home Base makeover.
Yeah.
388
00:14:50,023 --> 00:14:51,391
She tried a few styles
before this.
389
00:14:51,424 --> 00:14:53,460
Apparently pregnant women
redecorate a lot.
390
00:14:53,493 --> 00:14:54,561
Hmm.
Yeah.
391
00:14:54,594 --> 00:14:57,064
A lot of stuff changed
while you were out of town.
392
00:14:57,097 --> 00:15:00,167
VALENCIA:
I'm very good at it now.
393
00:15:00,200 --> 00:15:02,402
(laughing):
It was ridiculous.
394
00:15:02,435 --> 00:15:04,904
Oh, my God.
That's so funny.
395
00:15:06,573 --> 00:15:08,441
(laughter)
396
00:15:08,475 --> 00:15:10,143
SUNIL:
Bleh! (laughs)
397
00:15:10,177 --> 00:15:11,478
It was gross!
398
00:15:11,511 --> 00:15:14,014
(Jim laughing)
399
00:15:14,047 --> 00:15:15,448
Like, oh, no.
400
00:15:15,482 --> 00:15:17,350
But a lot of stuff's
still the same.
401
00:15:17,384 --> 00:15:19,486
(sighs)
Okay, that was the last time.
402
00:15:19,519 --> 00:15:21,088
Definitely.
403
00:15:21,121 --> 00:15:22,990
This time we mean it, right?
Yes.
404
00:15:23,023 --> 00:15:25,192
(phone vibrating)
405
00:15:25,225 --> 00:15:28,261
Uhp, this is Mona.
I have to take it.
406
00:15:28,295 --> 00:15:29,562
(grunts) Hey, babe.
407
00:15:29,596 --> 00:15:31,098
REBECCA:
So, it's been eight months,
408
00:15:31,131 --> 00:15:32,099
and he still has a girlfriend
409
00:15:32,132 --> 00:15:33,300
and we're still
sleeping together.
410
00:15:33,333 --> 00:15:35,268
So what?
411
00:15:35,302 --> 00:15:38,538
I really thought this time
was gonna be different.
412
00:15:43,743 --> 00:15:49,549
So, it's been
eight months of
413
00:15:49,582 --> 00:15:52,485
"last times,"
"big mistakes,"
414
00:15:52,519 --> 00:15:55,088
and "never gonna happen agains."
415
00:15:55,122 --> 00:15:56,389
So that's what you do
when you're writing.
416
00:15:56,423 --> 00:15:57,390
You just write things I say
417
00:15:57,424 --> 00:15:59,026
and then quote them back to me
at a later date.
418
00:15:59,059 --> 00:16:00,693
Cool. I can do that, too.
419
00:16:00,727 --> 00:16:02,695
(mockingly):
"Uh, so it's been eight months.
420
00:16:02,729 --> 00:16:05,365
"Uh, and I'm gonna quote
a bunch of things that you said
421
00:16:05,398 --> 00:16:08,468
back to you and wear another
weird statement necklace."
422
00:16:09,536 --> 00:16:11,438
I'm sorry.
423
00:16:11,471 --> 00:16:14,041
I felt cornered
and threatened by you,
424
00:16:14,074 --> 00:16:16,176
and rather than be vulnerable,
I lashed out
425
00:16:16,209 --> 00:16:18,345
before you could abandon me,
and I recognize that,
426
00:16:18,378 --> 00:16:19,146
and I apologize for it.
427
00:16:19,179 --> 00:16:21,014
But your necklaces
are very weird.
428
00:16:21,048 --> 00:16:22,582
It's been months
429
00:16:22,615 --> 00:16:24,384
and you're still sleeping
with him
430
00:16:24,417 --> 00:16:27,020
and he's got
a serious girlfriend. Correct?
431
00:16:27,054 --> 00:16:28,388
Yes.
432
00:16:28,421 --> 00:16:29,689
We're doing great work here.
433
00:16:29,722 --> 00:16:31,358
Why have an affair?
434
00:16:31,391 --> 00:16:33,060
An affair?
435
00:16:33,093 --> 00:16:36,029
Well, that's unfair.
436
00:16:36,063 --> 00:16:37,397
Come on.
437
00:16:37,430 --> 00:16:40,067
Are we not doing this?
438
00:16:40,100 --> 00:16:42,602
Bunch and Akopes,
tonight on CBS.
439
00:16:42,635 --> 00:16:46,439
Grab your parka or bikini,
and let's find out whodunit.
440
00:16:46,473 --> 00:16:48,741
You've been trying to get
that bit going for eight months.
441
00:16:48,775 --> 00:16:51,144
Stop it.
But I have a theme song.
442
00:16:51,178 --> 00:16:52,579
* Nuh, duh, duh, duh,
two ladies *
443
00:16:52,612 --> 00:16:54,047
* Duh, duh, duh, duh,
solving crimes *
444
00:16:54,081 --> 00:16:55,615
* Duh, duh, duh, duh,
in Bahamas *
445
00:16:55,648 --> 00:16:57,484
* Duh, duh, duh, duh,
now it's Europe! *
446
00:16:57,517 --> 00:16:59,086
But it's all just Atlanta.
447
00:16:59,119 --> 00:17:01,154
You have no qualms about this?
448
00:17:01,188 --> 00:17:04,224
No concern for the third party
in that relationship?
449
00:17:04,257 --> 00:17:05,758
What, the janitor?
No, he's loving it.
450
00:17:06,793 --> 00:17:09,096
(sighs)
If you're talking about Mona...
451
00:17:09,129 --> 00:17:11,064
Look, she has no idea
what's going on,
452
00:17:11,098 --> 00:17:11,964
so it's not hurting her.
453
00:17:11,998 --> 00:17:14,734
And I've never even met her.
You know what?
454
00:17:14,767 --> 00:17:16,536
This is the healthiest
romantic relationship
455
00:17:16,569 --> 00:17:18,805
I've ever been in.
There, I said it.
456
00:17:18,838 --> 00:17:22,809
I-I'm not obsessed with him
because I can't really have him.
457
00:17:22,842 --> 00:17:24,744
For the first time in my life,
my expectations
458
00:17:24,777 --> 00:17:26,246
are in a realistic space.
459
00:17:26,279 --> 00:17:27,714
The other day I texted him,
460
00:17:27,747 --> 00:17:29,749
and he didn't text me back
for couple hours.
461
00:17:29,782 --> 00:17:31,651
You know what I did
in that time?
462
00:17:31,684 --> 00:17:34,521
I made a damn sandwich.
And it was good.
463
00:17:34,554 --> 00:17:36,256
It's all okay, okay?
464
00:17:36,289 --> 00:17:38,691
What we're doing is okay.
Okay?
465
00:17:38,725 --> 00:17:40,860
PAULA:
That cheating, lying,
466
00:17:40,893 --> 00:17:43,796
musical theater enthusiast.
467
00:17:43,830 --> 00:17:45,665
What? Who are you
talking about?
468
00:17:45,698 --> 00:17:47,567
What? I'm talking about Sunil.
469
00:17:47,600 --> 00:17:49,636
Oh. Ew. Why?
470
00:17:49,669 --> 00:17:51,504
Okay, have you looked
around this office
471
00:17:51,538 --> 00:17:53,240
and seen him being pals
with everyone?
472
00:17:53,273 --> 00:17:54,807
I mean, I
brought him in,
473
00:17:54,841 --> 00:17:57,110
I gave him the job,
and he barely talks to me.
474
00:17:57,144 --> 00:17:59,246
Wait, back it up.
Sunil works here?
475
00:17:59,279 --> 00:18:01,681
Uh, yes.
476
00:18:02,649 --> 00:18:03,850
Where have you been?
477
00:18:03,883 --> 00:18:05,552
Nothing. Nowhere.
The janitor's creepy.
478
00:18:05,585 --> 00:18:06,886
Okay, will you
listen to me?
479
00:18:06,919 --> 00:18:10,123
I gave Sunil a job,
and he was supposed to help me
480
00:18:10,157 --> 00:18:11,558
and be on my team.
481
00:18:11,591 --> 00:18:15,128
And instead, he-he joined
their idiot cult.
482
00:18:15,162 --> 00:18:16,496
Ow! Damn it.
Damn it.
Got you.
483
00:18:16,529 --> 00:18:17,830
Fast hands.
Ah!
484
00:18:17,864 --> 00:18:20,467
I'm sorry, Paula.
You guys were such good friends.
485
00:18:20,500 --> 00:18:21,701
I mean, I don't like him
or get him
486
00:18:21,734 --> 00:18:23,636
because he's like...
487
00:18:23,670 --> 00:18:25,705
he's like Benjamin Coffin III
in Rent.
488
00:18:25,738 --> 00:18:27,140
But, you know, I mean,
489
00:18:27,174 --> 00:18:29,242
you seem to dig him, so...
490
00:18:29,276 --> 00:18:32,712
Well, I mean, I did, but...
now he's my enemy.
491
00:18:32,745 --> 00:18:36,183
(sighs) Like Boss Hogg
in The Dukes of Hazzard.
492
00:18:36,216 --> 00:18:37,250
I keep forgetting,
493
00:18:37,284 --> 00:18:40,153
you and I have, like,
such different references.
494
00:18:40,187 --> 00:18:41,788
(clears throat)
495
00:18:41,821 --> 00:18:45,592
Ms. Proctor, I just redid this,
per your copious notes.
496
00:18:45,625 --> 00:18:46,826
I'm sorry.
497
00:18:46,859 --> 00:18:50,630
I mean, look,
you had to redo it.
498
00:18:50,663 --> 00:18:53,533
Citing Manuel v. Cahill
to argue a zoning restriction?
499
00:18:53,566 --> 00:18:55,602
I mean, this is
a professional law firm.
500
00:18:55,635 --> 00:18:57,737
It's not eighth grade
mock trial.
501
00:18:57,770 --> 00:19:00,907
Wow. Okay.
502
00:19:00,940 --> 00:19:02,575
All right.
503
00:19:03,776 --> 00:19:05,912
(laughing)
504
00:19:05,945 --> 00:19:07,247
Oh, my God.
505
00:19:07,280 --> 00:19:08,915
You were so mean to him.
506
00:19:08,948 --> 00:19:10,450
Oh, you just
talked to him
507
00:19:10,483 --> 00:19:12,885
just like you talk to
Tim and Jim and Maya.
508
00:19:12,919 --> 00:19:14,821
That wasn't mean.
I was not mean.
509
00:19:14,854 --> 00:19:16,456
I gave him my
honest opinion.
510
00:19:16,489 --> 00:19:18,725
I mean, I have to be honest
about the work.
511
00:19:18,758 --> 00:19:21,428
Okay. I-I don't care.
512
00:19:21,461 --> 00:19:23,863
I mean, again, I feel like
he's like an evil landlord
513
00:19:23,896 --> 00:19:25,432
making us pay our rent.
514
00:19:25,465 --> 00:19:26,566
What?
515
00:19:26,599 --> 00:19:28,701
Okay, you know what,
just Wikipedia the plot to Rent
516
00:19:28,735 --> 00:19:30,503
and get back to me--
it's really easy.
517
00:19:30,537 --> 00:19:32,472
But don't watch the movie!
Don't watch the movie.
518
00:19:32,505 --> 00:19:33,506
Okay.
519
00:19:36,609 --> 00:19:38,678
Hi.
520
00:19:38,711 --> 00:19:40,680
Hey.
How's your day going?
521
00:19:40,713 --> 00:19:42,282
Pretty good. You?
522
00:19:42,315 --> 00:19:45,218
Big mistake.
Never again.
523
00:19:45,252 --> 00:19:46,953
This is the last time.
524
00:19:46,986 --> 00:19:49,222
Yeah, or not.
525
00:19:49,256 --> 00:19:50,690
What?
526
00:19:50,723 --> 00:19:52,659
I was talking about this
in therapy today,
527
00:19:52,692 --> 00:19:55,828
and I got to say,
this arrangement is...
528
00:19:55,862 --> 00:19:57,230
it's working.
529
00:19:57,264 --> 00:19:58,498
And, you know,
530
00:19:58,531 --> 00:19:59,532
it's modern, it's mature.
531
00:19:59,566 --> 00:20:02,935
I mean, it's what they do
in France. And Utah.
532
00:20:02,969 --> 00:20:05,638
Literally the only thing
France and Utah have in common.
533
00:20:05,672 --> 00:20:07,307
I think we should just be
grown-ups about this
534
00:20:07,340 --> 00:20:09,242
and accept the fact
that this is our reality.
535
00:20:09,276 --> 00:20:11,611
You know? It's cool.
We're having sex.
536
00:20:11,644 --> 00:20:12,845
You're seeing someone else.
537
00:20:12,879 --> 00:20:14,747
I'm making sandwiches,
and they're great.
538
00:20:14,781 --> 00:20:16,716
Huh?
It's a whole thing.
539
00:20:16,749 --> 00:20:19,619
I think we should just
embrace that this is our life.
540
00:20:19,652 --> 00:20:20,620
Okay.
541
00:20:20,653 --> 00:20:23,790
Because, um, well,
I was gonna ask you, uh...
542
00:20:23,823 --> 00:20:25,325
Mona saw the invitation
543
00:20:25,358 --> 00:20:27,960
to Darryl's baby shower,
and she wants to go.
544
00:20:27,994 --> 00:20:31,731
And I know that you're gonna go,
and... you know...
545
00:20:31,764 --> 00:20:33,733
Is that cool if I bring her?
546
00:20:33,766 --> 00:20:35,001
Dude, of course.
547
00:20:35,034 --> 00:20:36,903
Yeah.
We're all adults.
548
00:20:36,936 --> 00:20:39,005
And I-I am looking forward
to meeting her.
549
00:20:40,307 --> 00:20:42,008
You are?
Mm-hmm.
550
00:20:42,041 --> 00:20:45,612
Oh. (scoffs) Okay. Great.
551
00:20:45,645 --> 00:20:48,615
This adult is...
happy to hear it.
552
00:20:48,648 --> 00:20:49,816
See, we know exactly
what we have.
553
00:20:49,849 --> 00:20:50,917
That's what I love about it.
554
00:20:50,950 --> 00:20:52,885
Love about me?
Definitely not.
555
00:20:52,919 --> 00:20:54,887
(laughs) Yeah.
Got it. Yep.
556
00:20:54,921 --> 00:20:56,789
Cool.
557
00:21:04,431 --> 00:21:05,598
Hello.
558
00:21:05,632 --> 00:21:08,835
I think you're gonna be pretty
excited about what I got you.
559
00:21:08,868 --> 00:21:12,439
I got you some lotion.
560
00:21:12,472 --> 00:21:14,507
Hmm?
Cool.
561
00:21:14,541 --> 00:21:17,977
And some really nice
decaf coffee blends. Mmm.
562
00:21:18,010 --> 00:21:19,546
Mm-hmm.
563
00:21:19,579 --> 00:21:22,382
And non-alcoholic beer.
564
00:21:22,415 --> 00:21:24,351
That's gonna hit the spot.
565
00:21:24,384 --> 00:21:27,887
Yeah. So what's so crazy
about all of these things
566
00:21:27,920 --> 00:21:30,457
is that none it
is a skateboard,
567
00:21:30,490 --> 00:21:32,359
which is what
I asked you for.
568
00:21:32,392 --> 00:21:34,461
(exhales)
Because you're super pregnant.
569
00:21:34,494 --> 00:21:36,363
Okay? You-you have a person
inside you,
570
00:21:36,396 --> 00:21:38,731
and if you fall over,
you could break that person.
571
00:21:38,765 --> 00:21:41,501
Look, I know
it's hard,
572
00:21:41,534 --> 00:21:42,735
but you signed up for this.
573
00:21:42,769 --> 00:21:44,604
This could not possibly
have been more optional.
574
00:21:44,637 --> 00:21:46,839
You said you wanted to have
a baby for your friends.
575
00:21:46,873 --> 00:21:49,876
And for once in your life,
you can't quit.
576
00:21:52,412 --> 00:21:53,613
Oh, my God.
577
00:21:53,646 --> 00:21:54,814
What's going on?
578
00:21:54,847 --> 00:21:56,916
Is something wrong
with your face?
579
00:21:59,819 --> 00:22:01,954
Oh, my God,
I've never seen you cry.
580
00:22:01,988 --> 00:22:04,524
(crying):
That's because I don't cry.
581
00:22:05,792 --> 00:22:08,528
When I was a baby,
I didn't cry at all.
582
00:22:08,561 --> 00:22:10,430
And they took me to the hospital
583
00:22:10,463 --> 00:22:12,399
because they thought
I was broken,
584
00:22:12,432 --> 00:22:14,967
but I was just
a super chill baby.
585
00:22:15,001 --> 00:22:19,639
And now I feel like I'm
gonna cry all the time,
586
00:22:19,672 --> 00:22:22,742
and I think it's because
there's this alien
587
00:22:22,775 --> 00:22:24,777
growing inside of my guts.
588
00:22:24,811 --> 00:22:26,513
Oh, honey, it's okay.
589
00:22:26,546 --> 00:22:28,981
No, get your super
smooth arms off of me.
590
00:22:29,015 --> 00:22:30,950
Yeah, they're too smooth.
591
00:22:30,983 --> 00:22:34,654
So, would now be a bad time
592
00:22:34,687 --> 00:22:38,491
to remind you that Darryl's
baby shower is about to happen?
593
00:22:38,525 --> 00:22:40,793
Oh, God. That thing.
594
00:22:40,827 --> 00:22:42,862
Oh, shoot,
we forgot to get him a present.
595
00:22:42,895 --> 00:22:46,966
I am making him
a present, bitch!
596
00:22:46,999 --> 00:22:48,901
(indistinct chatter)
597
00:22:55,975 --> 00:22:57,910
V, it is beautiful.
I love it.
598
00:22:57,944 --> 00:22:59,746
Aw. I couldn't have done it
without you
599
00:22:59,779 --> 00:23:01,581
covering all the boring side
of things.
600
00:23:01,614 --> 00:23:03,816
I'm so glad we're
in business together.
601
00:23:03,850 --> 00:23:06,018
You're so good
at charts and budgets
602
00:23:06,052 --> 00:23:07,954
and getting deals on stuff.
603
00:23:07,987 --> 00:23:10,690
I can't believe you got
those floating candles 75% off.
604
00:23:10,723 --> 00:23:11,958
That's so sexy.
605
00:23:13,726 --> 00:23:15,828
DARRYL:
There you are!
606
00:23:15,862 --> 00:23:17,930
Oh, my God!
607
00:23:17,964 --> 00:23:20,066
It is so beautiful! Ooh!
Oh.
608
00:23:20,099 --> 00:23:22,969
Yay!
Oh, I'm so happy!
609
00:23:23,002 --> 00:23:24,571
Okay, well, try not to cry,
610
00:23:24,604 --> 00:23:25,938
because it makes people
uncomfortable, mainly me.
611
00:23:25,972 --> 00:23:27,607
I'll try, I'll try.
612
00:23:27,640 --> 00:23:29,108
Oh, God!
613
00:23:29,141 --> 00:23:31,478
Onesies
that people can decorate?
614
00:23:31,511 --> 00:23:34,481
Muh-muh. Tears,
you stay in there.
615
00:23:34,514 --> 00:23:36,483
If I just walk
like this...
616
00:23:36,516 --> 00:23:39,051
No one talk to me.
617
00:23:39,085 --> 00:23:42,622
Also, I'm not opening
a damn thing.
618
00:23:42,655 --> 00:23:43,990
(groans)
619
00:23:44,023 --> 00:23:45,592
What's with her?
620
00:23:45,625 --> 00:23:47,860
She's a monster.
621
00:23:47,894 --> 00:23:49,028
(clears throat)
622
00:23:51,964 --> 00:23:54,100
(Sunil chattering indistinctly)
623
00:23:54,133 --> 00:23:55,902
PAULA:
Oh, my God, it's Sunil.
624
00:23:55,935 --> 00:23:57,870
I don't know, I've been
thinking about what you said,
625
00:23:57,904 --> 00:23:59,739
and-and maybe I was
too hard on him.
626
00:23:59,772 --> 00:24:01,007
I should apologize.
627
00:24:01,040 --> 00:24:02,074
I'm gonna apologize.
628
00:24:02,108 --> 00:24:03,776
I mean, sure, if you want to.
629
00:24:03,810 --> 00:24:05,612
You know what,
do it in his terms.
630
00:24:05,645 --> 00:24:06,746
Tell him that
631
00:24:06,779 --> 00:24:07,547
he's Herbie
632
00:24:07,580 --> 00:24:08,681
and you're Mama Rose from Gypsy
633
00:24:08,715 --> 00:24:11,083
and you're about to sing
"You'll Never Get Away from Me."
634
00:24:11,117 --> 00:24:13,686
You and Sunil really are
the ones that should be friends.
635
00:24:13,720 --> 00:24:14,987
I mean,
you-you know that, right?
636
00:24:15,021 --> 00:24:17,089
Never. I'd rather die.
Oh, okay.
637
00:24:17,123 --> 00:24:18,157
(Paula exhales)
638
00:24:18,190 --> 00:24:19,826
I'm gonna get a drink.
639
00:24:19,859 --> 00:24:21,894
Do you want a drink?
Yeah, no, I'm good.
640
00:24:21,928 --> 00:24:23,563
(sighs)
641
00:24:23,596 --> 00:24:25,532
Hmm.
642
00:24:27,900 --> 00:24:29,869
*
643
00:24:38,611 --> 00:24:40,913
Oh, no.
644
00:24:40,947 --> 00:24:43,783
Oh, no. I don't like this.
645
00:24:43,816 --> 00:24:46,919
Uh, guilt, shame, jealousy.
646
00:24:46,953 --> 00:24:48,788
No, I don't want this.
647
00:24:48,821 --> 00:24:50,790
This doesn't feel good.
648
00:24:50,823 --> 00:24:52,725
*
649
00:25:02,969 --> 00:25:04,604
SUNIL: Okay, okay, okay.
She is impossible.
650
00:25:04,637 --> 00:25:06,205
Paula is so difficult
to please.
651
00:25:06,238 --> 00:25:08,074
You know, nothing is
good enough for her.
652
00:25:08,107 --> 00:25:09,876
She's like Miss Hannigan,
653
00:25:09,909 --> 00:25:12,612
but not the Carol Burnett
version, the original company.
654
00:25:12,645 --> 00:25:14,213
Ugh.
MAYA: Has anyone
ever told you
655
00:25:14,246 --> 00:25:16,683
that you should be best
friends with Rebecca?
656
00:25:16,716 --> 00:25:18,050
(laughs):
Never.
657
00:25:18,084 --> 00:25:19,786
I'd rather die.
658
00:25:19,819 --> 00:25:21,220
JIM: I totally agree
with you about Paula.
659
00:25:21,253 --> 00:25:23,089
She once shredded
a brief I wrote,
660
00:25:23,122 --> 00:25:25,825
then took it out of the shredder
and put it in the other way.
661
00:25:25,858 --> 00:25:27,226
MAYA:
Paula is from
662
00:25:27,259 --> 00:25:28,961
an older generation
of women.
663
00:25:28,995 --> 00:25:31,964
She came up in an era
where she had to fight,
664
00:25:31,998 --> 00:25:35,835
and that's why now, sometimes,
she's such a big ol' "B."
665
00:25:35,868 --> 00:25:37,069
SUNIL (chuckles):
Yeah, I know.
666
00:25:37,103 --> 00:25:39,706
I used to really love her.
667
00:25:40,940 --> 00:25:42,675
But now I'm with you guys.
(chuckles)
668
00:25:42,709 --> 00:25:43,710
Cheers.
Yeah.
669
00:25:43,743 --> 00:25:45,812
Cheers.
(glasses clinking)
670
00:25:45,845 --> 00:25:48,848
*
671
00:25:50,983 --> 00:25:53,152
(indistinct chatter)
672
00:25:53,185 --> 00:25:55,154
Hey, I got to
get out of here.
673
00:25:55,187 --> 00:25:56,856
I got to get
out of here, too.
674
00:25:56,889 --> 00:25:58,625
No, no, you can't leave.
You're Auntie Paula.
675
00:25:58,658 --> 00:25:59,992
You're Mama Rebecca.
I'm not Mama Rebecca.
676
00:26:00,026 --> 00:26:02,194
I don't have any custody
rights, just the right
to pick the college.
677
00:26:02,228 --> 00:26:04,130
Okay, okay, so we both
need to find an excuse
678
00:26:04,163 --> 00:26:06,098
to get out of here.
What are we gonna do?
679
00:26:06,132 --> 00:26:07,900
I don't know.
680
00:26:07,934 --> 00:26:09,001
Huh?
681
00:26:09,035 --> 00:26:10,202
Oh, no, there's a bee
on your dress.
682
00:26:10,236 --> 00:26:13,139
What? (shrieks)
683
00:26:13,172 --> 00:26:15,141
Whoops. I tried to save you
from a stinging insect,
684
00:26:15,174 --> 00:26:16,843
but accidentally used
my cupcake hand.
685
00:26:16,876 --> 00:26:19,011
Oh, oh, the same insect
is on you.
686
00:26:19,045 --> 00:26:21,013
Oh, no. Ooh... ah, my God.
687
00:26:21,047 --> 00:26:23,883
Sensitive boobs.
You know that. (groans)
688
00:26:23,916 --> 00:26:26,152
Oh... aw, shucks. Guess
we got to go clean up now.
689
00:26:26,185 --> 00:26:27,286
We're so sorry.
We got to go.
690
00:26:27,319 --> 00:26:28,487
Back way, back way,
back way.
691
00:26:28,520 --> 00:26:30,122
You're gonna love
these cupcakes.
We got to go clean up.
692
00:26:30,156 --> 00:26:31,257
Delicious.
We got to get it off.
693
00:26:31,290 --> 00:26:34,026
It's all over.
So good. Come on.
694
00:26:34,060 --> 00:26:35,895
So, am I really
the office bitch?
695
00:26:35,928 --> 00:26:37,997
(laughing)
696
00:26:42,134 --> 00:26:44,170
Wait, you're actually
asking me that?
697
00:26:44,203 --> 00:26:46,939
Paula, it's your brand.
698
00:26:46,973 --> 00:26:49,241
You have the mug
that says "Office Bitch."
699
00:26:49,275 --> 00:26:50,877
It's ironic.
700
00:26:50,910 --> 00:26:53,680
Like the mug that says
"Not A Mug."
701
00:26:53,713 --> 00:26:54,747
I guess so.
702
00:26:54,781 --> 00:26:56,983
I mean, you're nice to me,
so I don't really care.
703
00:26:57,016 --> 00:26:58,184
Hey, I know why I had
to leave that party,
704
00:26:58,217 --> 00:26:58,985
but why did you have to?
705
00:26:59,018 --> 00:27:01,053
It was just hard
to see Nathaniel.
706
00:27:01,087 --> 00:27:02,722
I mean, you know,
707
00:27:02,755 --> 00:27:05,091
my desk faces his,
so I'm just kind of, like,
708
00:27:05,124 --> 00:27:06,793
tired of that face
709
00:27:06,826 --> 00:27:08,895
and those perfect
blue eyes
710
00:27:08,928 --> 00:27:11,731
and the perfect smile
and the hot ass.
711
00:27:11,764 --> 00:27:12,865
Uh-oh.
712
00:27:12,899 --> 00:27:15,802
Paula?
713
00:27:15,835 --> 00:27:17,069
Uh-huh?
714
00:27:17,103 --> 00:27:19,005
You gonna be mad at me.
715
00:27:19,038 --> 00:27:21,073
Uh-huh.
716
00:27:21,107 --> 00:27:23,275
You know the possum
and the cat
717
00:27:23,309 --> 00:27:26,112
who have been fighting
in the supply closet?
718
00:27:26,145 --> 00:27:27,213
Uh-huh.
719
00:27:27,246 --> 00:27:29,949
That's not a possum or a cat.
720
00:27:29,982 --> 00:27:32,084
That's two people having sex.
721
00:27:32,118 --> 00:27:34,220
And it's me and Nathaniel!
Rebecca,
722
00:27:34,253 --> 00:27:35,321
he has a serious girlfriend!
723
00:27:35,354 --> 00:27:36,889
He-he's cheating on her
with you?
724
00:27:36,923 --> 00:27:38,124
You're having an affair?
725
00:27:38,157 --> 00:27:40,192
No, it's not an affair; she
doesn't know anything about it.
726
00:27:40,226 --> 00:27:41,193
What?!
727
00:27:41,227 --> 00:27:42,895
Ah! Don't judge me right now.
728
00:27:42,929 --> 00:27:44,764
Oh, to hell with that.
I am judging you.
729
00:27:44,797 --> 00:27:46,232
I am judging you
so hard right now!
730
00:27:46,265 --> 00:27:47,333
No, please don't.
731
00:27:47,366 --> 00:27:48,835
Do you know what you are?
732
00:27:48,868 --> 00:27:50,069
You're a Tanya.
733
00:27:51,103 --> 00:27:52,371
You're a stone-cold Tanya.
No.
734
00:27:52,404 --> 00:27:54,140
You take that back.
I am nothing like
735
00:27:54,173 --> 00:27:55,407
that woman Scott
cheated on you with.
736
00:27:55,441 --> 00:27:56,542
Nathaniel and Mona
aren't married,
737
00:27:56,575 --> 00:27:59,178
they don't have kids,
and I don't own an orange vest,
738
00:27:59,211 --> 00:28:01,213
which is the only fact
that I retain about Tanya.
739
00:28:01,247 --> 00:28:03,983
I just, I can't, I can't believe
you're a cheater.
740
00:28:04,016 --> 00:28:05,384
I mean, you know
how much it hurt me
741
00:28:05,417 --> 00:28:07,086
when I was cheated on.
742
00:28:07,119 --> 00:28:10,089
Oh, my God, I know.
You're right, you're right.
743
00:28:10,122 --> 00:28:12,424
You're right. I mean, it's why
I've been avoiding telling you.
744
00:28:12,458 --> 00:28:13,926
But I don't understand.
745
00:28:13,960 --> 00:28:15,862
Because you dumped him,
he still seems like
746
00:28:15,895 --> 00:28:16,929
he wants to be with you.
747
00:28:16,963 --> 00:28:19,331
Like, wh-why wouldn't you
just date each other?
748
00:28:19,365 --> 00:28:20,967
Just go out with him.
749
00:28:30,109 --> 00:28:31,911
(clears throat)
750
00:28:34,380 --> 00:28:36,348
Hey.
Hi.
751
00:28:36,382 --> 00:28:39,018
I guess you didn't make it
to the baby shower.
752
00:28:39,051 --> 00:28:40,920
You missed the blessing
of the egg donor.
753
00:28:40,953 --> 00:28:43,355
We all whispered intentions
into hard-boiled eggs.
754
00:28:43,389 --> 00:28:46,425
Yeah, I got some cupcake on
my shirt, so I-I had to leave.
755
00:28:48,427 --> 00:28:52,164
Oh, um, you know, I'm actually
running low on pens.
756
00:28:52,198 --> 00:28:54,233
Are you running low
on sticky thingies?
757
00:28:54,266 --> 00:28:56,102
You want to hit
the supply closet?
758
00:28:56,135 --> 00:28:58,170
Um...
759
00:29:00,006 --> 00:29:02,474
You know what?
I would love to.
760
00:29:02,508 --> 00:29:05,477
I really would, but...
761
00:29:05,511 --> 00:29:07,113
I-I can't.
762
00:29:07,146 --> 00:29:08,915
What?
763
00:29:08,948 --> 00:29:13,319
(sighs) Yeah, um... listen.
764
00:29:13,352 --> 00:29:17,389
I think I'm... good
765
00:29:17,423 --> 00:29:20,159
on office supplies...
766
00:29:20,192 --> 00:29:22,128
forever.
767
00:29:22,161 --> 00:29:24,496
Why no more office supplies?
768
00:29:24,530 --> 00:29:28,000
So, I know that I said that...
769
00:29:29,368 --> 00:29:31,537
...I could get...
770
00:29:31,570 --> 00:29:35,007
pencils and pens
with you indefinitely...
771
00:29:37,009 --> 00:29:38,410
...but I can't.
772
00:29:38,444 --> 00:29:40,913
NATHANIEL: Why?
Y-You said getting...
773
00:29:42,181 --> 00:29:44,917
...Scotch Tape and Wite-Out
774
00:29:44,951 --> 00:29:47,253
doesn't hurt anybody--
that's what you said.
775
00:29:47,286 --> 00:29:50,256
Yeah, but I was wrong.
I was wrong, it does.
776
00:29:50,289 --> 00:29:51,257
What are they talking about?
777
00:29:51,290 --> 00:29:52,458
It's pretty
obvious, dude.
778
00:29:52,491 --> 00:29:54,160
Somebody got hurt
with a pen.
779
00:29:54,193 --> 00:29:55,527
REBECCA:
The fact is (sighs)
780
00:29:55,561 --> 00:29:59,999
you're getting office supplies
from someone else.
781
00:30:00,032 --> 00:30:03,002
And I knew that,
but I didn't, like...
782
00:30:03,035 --> 00:30:04,303
I didn't know it
783
00:30:04,336 --> 00:30:06,205
until I caught
784
00:30:06,238 --> 00:30:08,374
a glimpse of your...
785
00:30:09,508 --> 00:30:13,179
...stationery representative.
786
00:30:13,212 --> 00:30:16,548
So, yeah, it, uh...
787
00:30:16,582 --> 00:30:18,317
it-it has to end.
788
00:30:18,350 --> 00:30:19,551
Oh.
789
00:30:19,585 --> 00:30:23,322
So... what I'm saying is
790
00:30:23,355 --> 00:30:27,093
no more staples,
no more paper clips,
791
00:30:27,126 --> 00:30:30,329
no more...
792
00:30:30,362 --> 00:30:33,065
spray cleaner
for the white boards.
793
00:30:33,099 --> 00:30:37,469
Well... okay.
794
00:30:37,503 --> 00:30:39,205
I understand.
795
00:30:39,238 --> 00:30:41,040
I guess we were
796
00:30:41,073 --> 00:30:46,045
just kidding ourselves when
we thought we could get erasers
797
00:30:46,078 --> 00:30:48,547
and toners
and index cards forever.
798
00:30:51,283 --> 00:30:55,487
I wish you all of the...
799
00:30:55,521 --> 00:31:00,126
freshest, inkiest
yellow highlighters
800
00:31:00,159 --> 00:31:01,527
there could ever be.
801
00:31:01,560 --> 00:31:04,130
And I you.
802
00:31:06,365 --> 00:31:08,134
I actually prefer
the pink highlighters.
803
00:31:12,204 --> 00:31:15,174
Why am I crying
right now?
804
00:31:15,207 --> 00:31:17,209
*
805
00:31:25,584 --> 00:31:27,586
*
806
00:31:31,557 --> 00:31:32,524
(keys jingle)
807
00:31:32,558 --> 00:31:34,260
Is it time?
808
00:31:34,293 --> 00:31:35,327
Is the baby coming?
809
00:31:35,361 --> 00:31:38,430
Ooh, what...
what are you wearing?
810
00:31:38,464 --> 00:31:42,401
Hey. So...
it's just a fat suit.
811
00:31:42,434 --> 00:31:43,535
What?
Yeah.
812
00:31:43,569 --> 00:31:46,405
Uh, my dad got us these
fat suits this one Thanksgiving,
813
00:31:46,438 --> 00:31:49,241
'cause he thought it'd be fun to
reenact the family dinner scene
814
00:31:49,275 --> 00:31:50,342
from The Nutty Professor.
815
00:31:50,376 --> 00:31:53,179
(chuckles)
Your dad is pretty great.
816
00:31:53,212 --> 00:31:54,446
I know. He rules.
817
00:31:54,480 --> 00:31:56,415
All right,
I'll catch you later, I guess.
818
00:31:56,448 --> 00:31:57,516
Wait, where you going?
819
00:31:57,549 --> 00:31:58,617
Oh, I told you,
820
00:31:58,650 --> 00:32:00,352
I'm going
to the skateboarding expo.
821
00:32:00,386 --> 00:32:02,154
And if they don't know
I'm pregnant,
822
00:32:02,188 --> 00:32:04,356
then they can't judge me
for grippin' it and rippin' it.
823
00:32:04,390 --> 00:32:06,292
And also, the suit
will protect the baby,
824
00:32:06,325 --> 00:32:07,559
so we're good.
(chuckles)
825
00:32:07,593 --> 00:32:09,095
Bye.
826
00:32:11,197 --> 00:32:13,499
Sorry, I do not
want to confront you
827
00:32:13,532 --> 00:32:15,267
because you are violent
and scary
828
00:32:15,301 --> 00:32:17,303
and you weigh more than me.
829
00:32:17,336 --> 00:32:20,506
Move, Hector,
or I will move you.
830
00:32:20,539 --> 00:32:21,640
Please don't make me do this.
831
00:32:21,673 --> 00:32:24,343
Do not make me wrestle
a pregnant woman in a fat suit,
832
00:32:24,376 --> 00:32:25,411
because I will.
833
00:32:28,214 --> 00:32:29,381
Oh, my God,
834
00:32:29,415 --> 00:32:30,482
there's a podcast.
Where?
835
00:32:30,516 --> 00:32:32,284
Wait.
836
00:32:32,318 --> 00:32:33,485
No!
837
00:32:33,519 --> 00:32:35,187
JIM:
Big gift! (laughs)
838
00:32:35,221 --> 00:32:36,388
Yeah, that's it.
Hey!
839
00:32:36,422 --> 00:32:38,490
You're all here. Great.
840
00:32:38,524 --> 00:32:42,194
I am here to be nice.
841
00:32:42,228 --> 00:32:44,596
No one's gonna
say hello? Okay.
842
00:32:44,630 --> 00:32:48,200
So, what are you guys doing?
843
00:32:48,234 --> 00:32:49,601
Just eating a snack.
844
00:32:49,635 --> 00:32:51,470
Mm-hmm.
Cool. Cool, cool,
cool, cool, cool.
845
00:32:52,771 --> 00:32:54,506
Ow! What the
hell, Paula?
846
00:32:54,540 --> 00:32:56,475
What? I want in
on the slapping game.
847
00:32:56,508 --> 00:32:58,344
Gotcha!
Ow!
848
00:32:58,377 --> 00:33:00,546
That is not
how you play Slappy Slaps.
849
00:33:00,579 --> 00:33:02,381
(scoffs)
850
00:33:04,750 --> 00:33:07,119
I'm sorry, Paula.
851
00:33:07,153 --> 00:33:09,288
I badly want to foster
an alliance with a woman,
852
00:33:09,321 --> 00:33:12,124
but I have to be
on the side of consent.
853
00:33:22,668 --> 00:33:24,236
Hey.
854
00:33:24,270 --> 00:33:26,538
(sighs)
855
00:33:26,572 --> 00:33:28,574
God, you guys are a tough room.
856
00:33:29,675 --> 00:33:31,443
I was just trying to be fun.
857
00:33:31,477 --> 00:33:33,545
You and I used to
have fun together, remember?
858
00:33:33,579 --> 00:33:36,582
Yeah, we used to, before
I started working here.
859
00:33:36,615 --> 00:33:39,318
Why didn't you tell me
you were the office bitch?
860
00:33:39,351 --> 00:33:40,652
I didn't know.
861
00:33:40,686 --> 00:33:42,454
Come on.
You have that mug.
(grumbles)
862
00:33:43,589 --> 00:33:45,357
(sighs)
863
00:33:45,391 --> 00:33:46,425
Look, Paula, I don't care
864
00:33:46,458 --> 00:33:48,627
that you're not all
fun and games at the office.
865
00:33:48,660 --> 00:33:49,595
I don't even care
that you yell
866
00:33:49,628 --> 00:33:51,663
at people for not refilling
the ice trays
867
00:33:51,697 --> 00:33:53,665
or the way
people chew their gum.
868
00:33:53,699 --> 00:33:56,368
Okay, no. I'm just saying,
chew one piece at a time.
869
00:33:56,402 --> 00:33:57,569
It's not a meal.
870
00:33:57,603 --> 00:33:59,271
What I do care about is that
871
00:33:59,305 --> 00:34:01,340
you're not acknowledging
my good work.
872
00:34:01,373 --> 00:34:03,509
You're number one in
our law school class;
873
00:34:03,542 --> 00:34:05,777
I'm right up there with you,
I'm number two.
874
00:34:05,811 --> 00:34:07,179
And yet, you
have dismissed
875
00:34:07,213 --> 00:34:08,447
everything I've handed you
876
00:34:08,480 --> 00:34:13,552
with a minor issue or quibble
about the font, the margins...
877
00:34:13,585 --> 00:34:14,553
Okay, can I just say something?
878
00:34:14,586 --> 00:34:17,456
No. My work is good.
879
00:34:17,489 --> 00:34:19,558
Everyone's work here
is pretty good.
880
00:34:19,591 --> 00:34:21,393
Okay, well, not Tim, obviously.
881
00:34:21,427 --> 00:34:23,262
He's a moron.
(scoffs)
882
00:34:23,295 --> 00:34:25,331
I just finished
this closing argument.
883
00:34:25,364 --> 00:34:27,399
I want you to read it
and consider it,
884
00:34:27,433 --> 00:34:29,635
because it is
damned good.
885
00:34:29,668 --> 00:34:32,338
I need you to
acknowledge that.
886
00:34:38,444 --> 00:34:40,412
(exhales)
887
00:34:40,446 --> 00:34:43,215
Hey.
888
00:34:43,249 --> 00:34:45,284
Hi.
889
00:34:45,317 --> 00:34:47,719
I know you said
you wanted things to be over,
890
00:34:47,753 --> 00:34:49,555
and I understand.
891
00:34:49,588 --> 00:34:51,490
I respect that.
892
00:34:52,624 --> 00:34:56,362
But I just wanted to say
that, um...
893
00:34:56,395 --> 00:34:58,730
the last few months
have meant a lot to me.
894
00:34:58,764 --> 00:35:01,333
And they weren't
just about the sex.
895
00:35:01,367 --> 00:35:02,868
They were about you.
896
00:35:02,901 --> 00:35:05,271
Me and you.
897
00:35:07,473 --> 00:35:10,242
And if that's what you want,
898
00:35:10,276 --> 00:35:13,645
I'll forget about
everything else.
899
00:35:13,679 --> 00:35:17,616
And everyone else.
900
00:35:17,649 --> 00:35:19,285
For you.
901
00:35:21,320 --> 00:35:22,521
Uh...
902
00:35:24,790 --> 00:35:26,792
*
903
00:35:42,274 --> 00:35:43,442
So, in not so
many words,
904
00:35:43,475 --> 00:35:47,346
he basically said he loves you
and wants to be with you.
905
00:35:47,379 --> 00:35:48,914
What did you say?
906
00:35:48,947 --> 00:35:50,482
Nothing.
907
00:35:50,516 --> 00:35:51,950
How do you feel about him?
908
00:35:51,983 --> 00:35:53,785
It doesn't matter.
909
00:35:53,819 --> 00:35:57,756
Rebecca, why do you think
your feelings don't matter?
910
00:35:57,789 --> 00:36:00,759
Because relationships
do not work for me.
911
00:36:00,792 --> 00:36:01,960
Did not work for you.
912
00:36:01,993 --> 00:36:05,264
You're a different person
than the last time you tried.
913
00:36:05,297 --> 00:36:06,965
No, I'm not.
914
00:36:06,998 --> 00:36:09,668
I'm not. I-I'm...
915
00:36:09,701 --> 00:36:14,840
I am a-a slightly saner version
of the person that I was,
916
00:36:14,873 --> 00:36:18,310
and I'm barely holding on
to even that.
917
00:36:19,811 --> 00:36:20,879
I mean, honestly, I'm afraid.
918
00:36:20,912 --> 00:36:23,782
Of course you are.
That makes sense.
919
00:36:23,815 --> 00:36:26,685
But you can't live your life
without intimacy.
920
00:36:26,718 --> 00:36:29,888
You need and deserve love.
921
00:36:29,921 --> 00:36:32,524
It's okay for you to have it.
922
00:36:32,558 --> 00:36:35,427
No, I-I can't. I-I can't.
God, you don't understand.
923
00:36:35,461 --> 00:36:36,428
What don't I understand?
924
00:36:36,462 --> 00:36:38,997
I don't want to die, okay?
925
00:36:39,030 --> 00:36:40,799
I've gotten better.
926
00:36:40,832 --> 00:36:42,801
Okay, I've progressed, and yes,
927
00:36:42,834 --> 00:36:44,936
I know that my relationship
with Nathaniel
928
00:36:44,970 --> 00:36:47,373
is not like it was with Josh.
929
00:36:47,406 --> 00:36:48,574
That's right.
930
00:36:48,607 --> 00:36:52,278
But if I try with Nathaniel,
something will happen, okay?
931
00:36:52,311 --> 00:36:54,480
He'll... he'll go out
to dinner with a friend,
932
00:36:54,513 --> 00:36:56,415
and he won't answer
one of my texts,
933
00:36:56,448 --> 00:37:00,352
or he'll go on a trip, and
he won't call me enough, and...
934
00:37:02,488 --> 00:37:06,358
...I know what I'm capable of
when I feel abandoned.
935
00:37:08,026 --> 00:37:11,029
I can go to a really dark place,
936
00:37:11,062 --> 00:37:13,932
and it's a place
where I can hurt myself,
937
00:37:13,965 --> 00:37:18,370
and I-I never want to be
in that place again, ever.
938
00:37:18,404 --> 00:37:20,038
Rebecca, that fear
is always gonna be there.
939
00:37:20,071 --> 00:37:24,343
But as a person who has
known you for a long time,
940
00:37:24,376 --> 00:37:27,446
you're more stable
and self-aware than you were.
941
00:37:27,479 --> 00:37:29,047
And you're a
loving person
942
00:37:29,080 --> 00:37:32,384
who deserves love.
943
00:37:34,353 --> 00:37:36,322
One day,
I hope you believe that.
944
00:37:45,531 --> 00:37:47,533
It's great.
945
00:37:47,566 --> 00:37:48,600
It's well written,
946
00:37:48,634 --> 00:37:50,068
it's well argued.
947
00:37:50,101 --> 00:37:51,903
It's great work.
948
00:37:53,905 --> 00:37:55,441
Thank you.
949
00:37:55,474 --> 00:37:57,343
Okay.
950
00:37:57,376 --> 00:38:00,011
I-I know that I seem, like,
super confident,
951
00:38:00,045 --> 00:38:02,481
and I may be
a big know-it-all...
952
00:38:02,514 --> 00:38:03,949
No. You?
953
00:38:03,982 --> 00:38:05,884
But I have insecurities,
just like everybody else.
954
00:38:05,917 --> 00:38:07,453
More, even.
955
00:38:07,486 --> 00:38:10,622
(sighs)
I was a "C" student growing up.
956
00:38:10,656 --> 00:38:12,891
And my father always
told me I was an idiot,
957
00:38:12,924 --> 00:38:15,627
and I got knocked up before
I could finish college,
958
00:38:15,661 --> 00:38:17,529
and I just, I always feel like
I'm trying to prove myself,
959
00:38:17,563 --> 00:38:20,632
especially in my career, because
it is so important to me.
960
00:38:20,666 --> 00:38:22,868
But that's my problem,
and it's not your problem,
961
00:38:22,901 --> 00:38:26,037
and I'm sorry I was a jerk,
because I was.
962
00:38:29,908 --> 00:38:31,543
Apology accepted.
963
00:38:31,577 --> 00:38:32,611
Really?
Yes.
964
00:38:32,644 --> 00:38:33,912
Oh!
Yes, thank you.
965
00:38:33,945 --> 00:38:34,980
This is good.
966
00:38:35,013 --> 00:38:37,449
Paula, I mean, it's like, um,
967
00:38:37,483 --> 00:38:40,419
I'm Kenickie and you're Rizzo,
and we're making up.
968
00:38:40,452 --> 00:38:42,654
I know that reference!
Grease, right?
969
00:38:42,688 --> 00:38:43,855
Yes, Grease.
970
00:38:43,889 --> 00:38:44,790
I saw the movie.
971
00:38:44,823 --> 00:38:47,426
And in this case,
the movie is preferred.
972
00:38:47,459 --> 00:38:48,860
Okay.
973
00:38:48,894 --> 00:38:49,928
(groans)
974
00:38:49,961 --> 00:38:52,531
So do I have to apologize
to everybody else now?
975
00:38:52,564 --> 00:38:55,000
Oh, no. They're morons.
976
00:38:55,033 --> 00:38:56,468
(both laugh)
977
00:38:56,502 --> 00:38:58,069
This is good.
978
00:38:58,103 --> 00:38:59,371
(laughs):
Yeah!
979
00:38:59,405 --> 00:39:02,408
(sighs)
980
00:39:02,441 --> 00:39:04,443
(chuckles softly)
981
00:39:06,044 --> 00:39:08,380
You're right.
982
00:39:08,414 --> 00:39:12,150
A nice lukewarm bath
makes everything better.
983
00:39:12,183 --> 00:39:15,521
Babe, why are you so upset
about a skateboard thing?
984
00:39:15,554 --> 00:39:17,689
Oh, it's not about a skateboard.
985
00:39:17,723 --> 00:39:19,458
It's about
my whole life.
986
00:39:19,491 --> 00:39:22,961
It's about having to be
responsible for things.
987
00:39:22,994 --> 00:39:26,498
I mean, I have a job
and a live-in boyfriend
988
00:39:26,532 --> 00:39:28,967
and a baby in my stomach.
989
00:39:29,000 --> 00:39:32,438
That's all grown-up stuff.
990
00:39:32,471 --> 00:39:35,707
I mean, I never thought
I would actually be a grown-up.
991
00:39:35,741 --> 00:39:36,575
Yeah.
992
00:39:36,608 --> 00:39:38,544
You know, I'm gonna
pay taxes this year.
993
00:39:38,577 --> 00:39:39,911
Isn't that ridiculous?
994
00:39:39,945 --> 00:39:43,114
Yeah. I know how you feel.
I get it.
995
00:39:43,148 --> 00:39:44,983
I don't know
how insurance works.
996
00:39:45,016 --> 00:39:46,452
Me, neither.
997
00:39:46,485 --> 00:39:49,455
We can figure
those things out.
998
00:39:49,488 --> 00:39:51,022
Me and you.
999
00:39:51,056 --> 00:39:52,157
Yeah.
1000
00:39:53,525 --> 00:39:55,527
*
1001
00:40:04,536 --> 00:40:06,538
(exhales)
1002
00:40:20,251 --> 00:40:23,121
* I've never been afraid
1003
00:40:23,154 --> 00:40:26,525
* Of opening my heart
1004
00:40:26,558 --> 00:40:29,528
* For the slightest chance
at love *
1005
00:40:29,561 --> 00:40:33,632
* I'd gladly tear
my life apart *
1006
00:40:33,665 --> 00:40:36,935
* But now I finally
have a sense *
1007
00:40:36,968 --> 00:40:40,539
* Of who I am inside
1008
00:40:40,572 --> 00:40:44,242
* So do I risk it all again
1009
00:40:44,275 --> 00:40:48,480
* Or do I run and hide?
1010
00:40:51,049 --> 00:40:53,719
* Face your fears
1011
00:40:53,752 --> 00:40:56,054
* Stare them down
1012
00:40:56,087 --> 00:40:59,525
* Don't be scared
1013
00:40:59,558 --> 00:41:03,261
* Stand your ground
1014
00:41:03,294 --> 00:41:06,064
* 'Cause love is not as scary
1015
00:41:06,097 --> 00:41:09,267
* As it appears
1016
00:41:09,300 --> 00:41:11,236
* All I got to do
1017
00:41:11,269 --> 00:41:14,105
* Is face my...
1018
00:41:36,562 --> 00:41:40,532
Captioning sponsored by
CBS
1019
00:41:40,566 --> 00:41:44,536
And TOYOTA.
1020
00:41:44,570 --> 00:41:48,574
Captioned by
Media Access Group at WGBH
access.wgbh.org
72287
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