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1
00:00:01,970 --> 00:00:04,050
Ah! There we go, sir.
2
00:00:07,650 --> 00:00:09,129
How much?
3
00:00:09,130 --> 00:00:10,689
Worth every penny, sir.
4
00:00:10,690 --> 00:00:12,689
Cured the Duke of Peebles.
5
00:00:12,690 --> 00:00:14,570
Oh, I didn't know he had peebles.
6
00:00:16,330 --> 00:00:18,129
Are... you saying I'VE got peebles?
7
00:00:18,130 --> 00:00:20,329
No, no, no, no, please, Mr Ridley.
8
00:00:20,330 --> 00:00:22,129
Peebles is not a disease,
9
00:00:22,130 --> 00:00:25,329
it's a place
where he was the Duke of.
10
00:00:25,330 --> 00:00:26,330
Oh!
11
00:00:27,970 --> 00:00:29,729
All I've got's a twinge in one knee.
12
00:00:29,730 --> 00:00:30,929
Yes, I know.
13
00:00:30,930 --> 00:00:33,610
Well, see a twinge today
and the leg goes green tomorrow.
14
00:00:34,890 --> 00:00:37,130
And where can you find socks
to match that?
15
00:00:38,290 --> 00:00:39,889
The wife knits socks!
16
00:00:39,890 --> 00:00:41,569
She can do green!
17
00:00:41,570 --> 00:00:42,769
No, sorry, er...
18
00:00:42,770 --> 00:00:43,969
Thing is that, er...
19
00:00:43,970 --> 00:00:45,609
Stay there for a moment, don't move.
20
00:00:45,610 --> 00:00:47,289
Not even the good knee.
21
00:00:47,290 --> 00:00:49,850
I'll be back in two ticks
of a lamb's tail.
22
00:00:51,730 --> 00:00:53,090
Right, come here. Ooh!
23
00:00:54,570 --> 00:00:56,129
Just do as I tell you.
24
00:00:56,130 --> 00:00:57,170
Come on.
25
00:00:58,850 --> 00:01:00,369
Here is my assistant.
26
00:01:00,370 --> 00:01:02,450
Right, er, show him your leg.
27
00:01:03,890 --> 00:01:05,449
My leg? Your leg, yes.
28
00:01:05,450 --> 00:01:08,370
It's one of those things that keeps
your bum off the ground, isn't it?
29
00:01:10,570 --> 00:01:12,849
The one that went green!
30
00:01:12,850 --> 00:01:14,849
And nearly fell off.
31
00:01:14,850 --> 00:01:16,049
Oh!
32
00:01:16,050 --> 00:01:18,290
That leg. Yeah.
33
00:01:23,250 --> 00:01:25,329
Look at that, sir.
34
00:01:25,330 --> 00:01:29,289
That is a testimony to the power of
healing that's in that bottle.
35
00:01:29,290 --> 00:01:31,129
That was his bad one?
36
00:01:31,130 --> 00:01:33,569
Bad one? We had to get him
to leave it outside!
37
00:01:33,570 --> 00:01:34,929
Tell him.
38
00:01:34,930 --> 00:01:36,409
Tell him what?
39
00:01:36,410 --> 00:01:39,649
Well, tell him how they said
that you'd never do ballet again.
40
00:01:39,650 --> 00:01:42,449
And, if you took your shoe off,
41
00:01:42,450 --> 00:01:44,090
your leg might come with it!
42
00:01:45,930 --> 00:01:47,689
I'm sorry.
43
00:01:47,690 --> 00:01:50,369
I can't help it, it's just, er...
44
00:01:50,370 --> 00:01:51,969
Thank you very much, sir!
45
00:01:51,970 --> 00:01:53,810
You'll want a bit of change
with that.
46
00:02:24,330 --> 00:02:25,610
Oh!
47
00:03:15,490 --> 00:03:16,769
Did you see that?!
48
00:03:16,770 --> 00:03:17,929
What?
49
00:03:17,930 --> 00:03:20,409
Well, it chucked this one back out!
50
00:03:20,410 --> 00:03:21,530
Must be a dud.
51
00:03:23,050 --> 00:03:24,689
Looks real to me.
52
00:03:24,690 --> 00:03:26,130
Yes, and me!
53
00:03:27,170 --> 00:03:30,929
Oh, well, it better find its way
into somebody's change.
54
00:03:32,490 --> 00:03:34,529
Oh, here's somebody now.
55
00:03:34,530 --> 00:03:36,210
Hey, that Madge!
56
00:03:37,810 --> 00:03:40,089
She thinks my family's weird!
57
00:03:40,090 --> 00:03:41,529
Well, they are weird.
58
00:03:41,530 --> 00:03:44,370
Oh, I suppose that could explain it.
59
00:03:46,010 --> 00:03:48,010
Have you got any flat kippers?
60
00:03:49,250 --> 00:03:51,129
You mean "fat" kippers?
61
00:03:51,130 --> 00:03:53,329
I mean FLAT kippers.
62
00:03:53,330 --> 00:03:55,929
Not curled up like yesterday.
63
00:03:55,930 --> 00:03:58,569
See our complaints department.
64
00:03:58,570 --> 00:04:01,090
Gastric, what shape is your mouth?
65
00:04:03,050 --> 00:04:05,170
It's not flat, is it?
66
00:04:06,930 --> 00:04:11,370
So what we do is we curl the kippers
to fit the shape of your mouth.
67
00:04:12,450 --> 00:04:16,209
I like something
that lies flat when heated.
68
00:04:16,210 --> 00:04:18,090
You never met his mother, did you?
69
00:04:28,250 --> 00:04:30,689
You've got a hair in your nose.
70
00:04:30,690 --> 00:04:33,729
You should either clip it
or get it styled.
71
00:04:33,730 --> 00:04:37,609
This is what you remember
from that romantic encounter?
72
00:04:37,610 --> 00:04:39,649
What are you going to do about Ruby?
73
00:04:39,650 --> 00:04:41,929
Oh, can we start
with something easier?
74
00:04:41,930 --> 00:04:43,449
She's in trouble.
75
00:04:43,450 --> 00:04:45,049
She's been suspended at work.
76
00:04:45,050 --> 00:04:46,690
Huh. By the neck?
77
00:04:47,930 --> 00:04:49,169
Don't be a blob.
78
00:04:49,170 --> 00:04:50,689
Help me to help her.
79
00:04:50,690 --> 00:04:53,889
Well, she works on construction
sites with big hairy men!
80
00:04:53,890 --> 00:04:55,049
A lone woman!
81
00:04:55,050 --> 00:04:56,610
She's bound to get into trouble.
82
00:04:57,850 --> 00:04:59,289
Oh, what happened?
83
00:04:59,290 --> 00:05:00,770
She floored two of them. Ah...
84
00:05:05,010 --> 00:05:06,849
Not too short.
85
00:05:06,850 --> 00:05:08,889
Willis, your mother said short!
86
00:05:08,890 --> 00:05:10,209
Well... I think what she meant
87
00:05:10,210 --> 00:05:11,489
was, "Not too short."
88
00:05:11,490 --> 00:05:13,769
Well, tell her you like longer hair.
89
00:05:13,770 --> 00:05:15,449
It's your hair!
90
00:05:15,450 --> 00:05:18,649
Although I realise you don't see it
as often as she does.
91
00:05:18,650 --> 00:05:19,849
What?
92
00:05:19,850 --> 00:05:21,289
Well, he doesn't!
93
00:05:21,290 --> 00:05:24,649
I mean, it's not where he can see it
without a mirror, is it?
94
00:05:24,650 --> 00:05:26,930
Have you tried
looking at your own hair?
95
00:05:32,570 --> 00:05:34,889
I-I said to her.
96
00:05:34,890 --> 00:05:36,729
I-I told her, "I like longer hair."
97
00:05:36,730 --> 00:05:38,329
Way to go! Assert yourself.
98
00:05:38,330 --> 00:05:40,169
And what did she say?
99
00:05:40,170 --> 00:05:42,209
She says I don't like longer hair.
100
00:05:42,210 --> 00:05:44,849
Willis, why don't you
get yourself a good girl
101
00:05:44,850 --> 00:05:47,249
and let her do your thinking
for you?
102
00:05:47,250 --> 00:05:49,289
Mother says there aren't
any good girls any more.
103
00:05:49,290 --> 00:05:51,129
Oh, they'd let you grow your hair.
104
00:05:51,130 --> 00:05:53,609
She says I'm better off at home.
It's safer.
105
00:05:53,610 --> 00:05:55,769
Anyway, I-I'm not good with girls.
106
00:05:55,770 --> 00:05:57,409
Have you tried?
107
00:05:57,410 --> 00:05:59,089
Well, how do you try?
108
00:05:59,090 --> 00:06:01,849
Like, how do you know
which ones take learners?
109
00:06:01,850 --> 00:06:04,129
Hey, if you fall into the hands
of a fast one,
110
00:06:04,130 --> 00:06:05,930
you'll learn quicker.
111
00:06:07,570 --> 00:06:09,449
Willis, you're a good-looking lad.
112
00:06:09,450 --> 00:06:12,769
If I was younger,
I'd run you through the basics.
113
00:06:12,770 --> 00:06:14,889
It's easier than you think.
114
00:06:14,890 --> 00:06:16,529
If you're not careful.
115
00:06:16,530 --> 00:06:19,050
Even in Cleethorpes,
and I was only there one night!
116
00:06:22,530 --> 00:06:25,649
How can you not believe
there's such a thing as fate?
117
00:06:25,650 --> 00:06:28,329
I'm under a more powerful influence.
118
00:06:28,330 --> 00:06:31,929
And she doesn't give me time
to think about things like fate.
119
00:06:31,930 --> 00:06:35,409
Well, here's your chance!
Think about it.
120
00:06:35,410 --> 00:06:36,769
Now?
121
00:06:36,770 --> 00:06:38,689
Well, what's wrong with now?
122
00:06:38,690 --> 00:06:40,209
Seize the moment!
123
00:06:40,210 --> 00:06:41,729
Oh, hey!
124
00:06:41,730 --> 00:06:44,930
Excuse me, could you two just pop in
and give us a hand?
125
00:06:46,570 --> 00:06:47,890
See? Fate.
126
00:06:49,370 --> 00:06:51,569
What if it's heavy lifting?
127
00:06:51,570 --> 00:06:54,330
He sells groceries,
how heavy can it be?
128
00:07:00,410 --> 00:07:03,809
Do you know, I'd forgotten
we'd got this old mangle.
129
00:07:03,810 --> 00:07:06,889
And we're so glad you remembered.
130
00:07:06,890 --> 00:07:09,569
You can see why people
get interested in philosophy.
131
00:07:09,570 --> 00:07:11,329
It's lighter!
132
00:07:11,330 --> 00:07:12,649
Put it there.
133
00:07:12,650 --> 00:07:14,610
Argh! It's on me foot!
134
00:07:15,810 --> 00:07:17,889
He didn't say put it on me foot!
135
00:07:17,890 --> 00:07:19,689
Try to think of it as fate.
136
00:07:19,690 --> 00:07:22,529
Yeah. No, change of plan.
137
00:07:22,530 --> 00:07:25,170
Let's have it back over here. Yeah.
138
00:07:29,050 --> 00:07:30,250
Personally...
139
00:07:31,450 --> 00:07:35,329
..I think we're approaching
the limit of physical endurance.
140
00:07:35,330 --> 00:07:37,689
People get hernias,
you know?
141
00:07:37,690 --> 00:07:40,689
Don't worry, I can sell you
a surgical belt.
142
00:07:40,690 --> 00:07:42,010
Fitting will be extra.
143
00:07:43,370 --> 00:07:45,689
What are you going to do
with an old mangle, anyway?
144
00:07:45,690 --> 00:07:47,049
He'll think of something.
145
00:07:47,050 --> 00:07:50,249
Is the hi-tech world ready
for the return of the mangle?
146
00:07:50,250 --> 00:07:52,409
When the mangle makes its comeback,
147
00:07:52,410 --> 00:07:56,049
you will be able to say,
"I was there."
148
00:07:56,050 --> 00:07:58,649
But not there, but there.
149
00:07:58,650 --> 00:08:00,490
Yeah. Hey, hey, come on.
150
00:08:09,290 --> 00:08:12,329
I want you to talk to Ruby
about her anger management.
151
00:08:12,330 --> 00:08:14,089
Fine.
152
00:08:14,090 --> 00:08:15,769
But only until she hits me.
153
00:08:15,770 --> 00:08:17,609
Why would she hit you?
154
00:08:17,610 --> 00:08:19,449
Well, she always hits me.
155
00:08:19,450 --> 00:08:21,249
She likes you, really.
156
00:08:21,250 --> 00:08:22,769
Go on, do this for me.
157
00:08:22,770 --> 00:08:23,849
Hiya, Ruby!
158
00:08:23,850 --> 00:08:26,329
Bog off! Well, catch up with her!
159
00:08:26,330 --> 00:08:28,969
But you heard what the girl said!
And it wasn't, "Hello, Leroy!"
160
00:08:28,970 --> 00:08:30,809
You're packing it in
at the first "bog off"?
161
00:08:30,810 --> 00:08:32,929
For Ruby, that's practically
"good morning".
162
00:08:32,930 --> 00:08:34,410
Go on, jog with her. Talk to her.
163
00:08:38,970 --> 00:08:42,809
What's all this about Mr Newbold
and Mrs Rossi?
164
00:08:42,810 --> 00:08:44,689
Oh, I don't believe it.
165
00:08:44,690 --> 00:08:46,569
Mr Newbold's too shy!
166
00:08:46,570 --> 00:08:50,009
Anyway, he's been off women
since he met Mrs Featherstone.
167
00:08:50,010 --> 00:08:51,329
What do you mean "met"?
168
00:08:51,330 --> 00:08:53,209
It was more like she kidnapped him!
169
00:08:53,210 --> 00:08:56,209
Well, people keep telling me
that Mr Newbold
170
00:08:56,210 --> 00:08:59,809
and Mrs Rossi were seen together in
the library chatting and laughing.
171
00:08:59,810 --> 00:09:02,489
Maybe they'd found a funny book.
172
00:09:02,490 --> 00:09:05,489
I can never figure out whether
you're dim or just playing dim.
173
00:09:05,490 --> 00:09:07,569
Me neither.
174
00:09:07,570 --> 00:09:09,609
Oh, she's always been like it.
175
00:09:09,610 --> 00:09:11,009
You go with what you've got.
176
00:09:11,010 --> 00:09:12,810
Even if you don't quite get it.
177
00:09:13,930 --> 00:09:16,689
For a start, I can't believe
that Mr Newbold was seen laughing!
178
00:09:16,690 --> 00:09:18,329
Well, he's not done much of that
179
00:09:18,330 --> 00:09:20,289
since he was occupied
by Mrs Featherstone!
180
00:09:20,290 --> 00:09:24,449
I wonder if she knows
about his interest in Mrs Rossi?
181
00:09:24,450 --> 00:09:27,569
Oh, no!
You'd have heard the explosion!
182
00:09:27,570 --> 00:09:29,009
Anyway, what's there to know?
183
00:09:29,010 --> 00:09:30,729
Bit of laughing in a library?
184
00:09:30,730 --> 00:09:33,329
Oh, I thought you weren't supposed
to laugh in libraries?
185
00:09:33,330 --> 00:09:36,649
I went in one once and all they said
to me was, "Shush."
186
00:09:36,650 --> 00:09:39,249
You could see them waiting for
every sound just so they could say,
187
00:09:39,250 --> 00:09:40,689
"Shush."
188
00:09:40,690 --> 00:09:44,569
Well, Mr Newbold's in for some shush
if Mrs Featherstone finds out.
189
00:09:44,570 --> 00:09:46,290
I wonder if she does know?
190
00:09:48,170 --> 00:09:49,609
Back in a tick.
191
00:09:49,610 --> 00:09:51,489
What's a tick?
192
00:09:51,490 --> 00:09:53,250
It's about half a tock.
193
00:09:55,250 --> 00:09:57,969
I must just make this call
to Mr Newbold.
194
00:09:57,970 --> 00:10:00,329
He worries if I'm not there
in the flesh.
195
00:10:00,330 --> 00:10:02,170
Or a comforting voice in his ear.
196
00:10:03,410 --> 00:10:04,969
Well, you now what they're like.
197
00:10:04,970 --> 00:10:07,809
They go to pieces if you're
not constantly within reach.
198
00:10:07,810 --> 00:10:09,929
Not that I don't keep
a strict control
199
00:10:09,930 --> 00:10:11,729
of where he's allowed to reach.
200
00:10:11,730 --> 00:10:13,569
I'll have a coffee, Mavis.
201
00:10:13,570 --> 00:10:16,010
And hold the gossip till I get back.
202
00:10:19,170 --> 00:10:21,010
She doesn't know.
203
00:10:24,770 --> 00:10:26,410
Ooh!
204
00:10:28,250 --> 00:10:30,649
You need some help
with your anger management.
205
00:10:30,650 --> 00:10:32,889
I can manage to get angry
without any help, thank you.
206
00:10:32,890 --> 00:10:35,729
You can't go round thumping people
at your workplace!
207
00:10:35,730 --> 00:10:38,569
What, you think I should do it
when they're going home?
208
00:10:38,570 --> 00:10:40,609
What was it all about, anyway?
209
00:10:40,610 --> 00:10:43,529
It's private! Yeah, that's where
you were doing all the damage.
210
00:10:43,530 --> 00:10:45,809
Well, you just have to go
with what works.
211
00:10:45,810 --> 00:10:48,449
This is no good.
I'm supposed to be exercising.
212
00:10:48,450 --> 00:10:49,929
I'm in training.
213
00:10:49,930 --> 00:10:51,530
Do you fancy a wrestle? No!
214
00:11:28,330 --> 00:11:30,289
Oh...
215
00:11:30,290 --> 00:11:33,089
What can we do for you today,
Mrs Featherstone?
216
00:11:33,090 --> 00:11:35,009
If I do marry Mr Newbold,
217
00:11:35,010 --> 00:11:38,169
I don't want you to feel neglected.
218
00:11:38,170 --> 00:11:42,449
I shall always be there for you
for recreational purposes.
219
00:11:42,450 --> 00:11:46,009
Oh, well, I'm sorry, I don't do
recreation, Mrs Featherstone.
220
00:11:46,010 --> 00:11:47,889
It's the hours, you know.
221
00:11:47,890 --> 00:11:50,650
Well, do remember that my husbands
never last long.
222
00:11:52,290 --> 00:11:54,209
How's your boiled ham?
223
00:11:54,210 --> 00:11:57,409
Better than your three husbands,
Mrs Featherstone.
224
00:11:57,410 --> 00:12:00,849
You've got a lovely
little business here.
225
00:12:00,850 --> 00:12:03,889
You know, I'd be such an asset
on your team.
226
00:12:03,890 --> 00:12:07,089
I know, I know, but of course,
it's the overheads, you see.
227
00:12:07,090 --> 00:12:08,729
They're killing us! Oh, yeah.
228
00:12:08,730 --> 00:12:10,889
Yes, what with that
and... and... and...
229
00:12:10,890 --> 00:12:12,370
..the damp rot.
230
00:12:15,890 --> 00:12:17,049
Er...
231
00:12:17,050 --> 00:12:18,490
Oh!
232
00:12:20,450 --> 00:12:23,370
Are you finding any damp rot,
Granville?
233
00:12:33,410 --> 00:12:35,169
Save me half a pound of ham.
234
00:12:35,170 --> 00:12:37,010
I'll be back for it later.
235
00:12:44,050 --> 00:12:46,169
We're getting low on muffins.
236
00:12:46,170 --> 00:12:48,490
You wouldn't have said that
a minute ago.
237
00:12:55,370 --> 00:12:56,850
Right, stay there...
238
00:12:57,930 --> 00:12:59,090
..and watch this.
239
00:13:03,170 --> 00:13:05,009
Huh?
240
00:13:05,010 --> 00:13:06,730
One curly kipper.
241
00:13:07,930 --> 00:13:11,250
We put that there,
turn the handle...
242
00:13:21,490 --> 00:13:23,610
How's that for nice and flat?
243
00:13:24,730 --> 00:13:27,569
You can't do stuff like that!
It's not hygienic!
244
00:13:27,570 --> 00:13:30,289
That thing could be swarming
with germs!
245
00:13:30,290 --> 00:13:32,849
Well, we'll wrap it in paper first!
246
00:13:32,850 --> 00:13:35,850
You can't do stuff like that.
Think of our reputation!
247
00:13:37,210 --> 00:13:39,089
Really?
248
00:13:39,090 --> 00:13:40,290
Oh, maybe not.
249
00:13:42,410 --> 00:13:46,210
There must be something
that this big old beast can do.
250
00:13:48,090 --> 00:13:49,889
Wait a minute...
251
00:13:49,890 --> 00:13:52,489
I've got it! Stay there.
252
00:13:52,490 --> 00:13:55,009
Don't move!
253
00:13:55,010 --> 00:13:58,009
Yes! I think I've solved
the problem...
254
00:13:58,010 --> 00:14:01,890
Where is it? Yes, here it is! Yes...
255
00:14:03,050 --> 00:14:05,969
Come along, my dear,
this will show you...
256
00:14:05,970 --> 00:14:08,089
..why we're in business together...
257
00:14:08,090 --> 00:14:09,410
We are going to be...
258
00:14:13,450 --> 00:14:15,610
..in business. Right.
259
00:14:19,770 --> 00:14:22,209
What we have here...
260
00:14:22,210 --> 00:14:26,049
..is one single-portion pizza.
261
00:14:26,050 --> 00:14:27,689
It's never going to work.
262
00:14:27,690 --> 00:14:29,289
Forget it!
263
00:14:29,290 --> 00:14:31,209
Watch this.
264
00:14:31,210 --> 00:14:33,609
We place the said pizza
265
00:14:33,610 --> 00:14:36,570
into the rollers, thusly...
266
00:14:40,730 --> 00:14:44,729
..we turn the handle,
and what you are about to see
267
00:14:44,730 --> 00:14:48,610
is one large-size thin and crispy.
268
00:15:00,370 --> 00:15:03,169
Large, thin, crispy...
269
00:15:03,170 --> 00:15:04,450
..and mangled.
270
00:15:09,850 --> 00:15:12,169
As soon as Mrs Rossi walks by,
271
00:15:12,170 --> 00:15:14,809
you step out, you give her the look.
272
00:15:14,810 --> 00:15:16,009
The look?
273
00:15:16,010 --> 00:15:17,289
Man meets his woman.
274
00:15:17,290 --> 00:15:19,289
Tarzan meets Jane.
275
00:15:19,290 --> 00:15:20,369
The eyes lock.
276
00:15:20,370 --> 00:15:21,729
The heart stirs.
277
00:15:21,730 --> 00:15:23,569
Sounds of bells.
278
00:15:23,570 --> 00:15:26,289
Well, where the devil
am I going to get a bell?
279
00:15:26,290 --> 00:15:29,249
Mystical bells! Imaginary tinkles!
280
00:15:29,250 --> 00:15:33,729
And you tell her, "This is the
first day of our new lives." Ah...
281
00:15:33,730 --> 00:15:34,889
"This...
282
00:15:34,890 --> 00:15:36,329
"..is...
283
00:15:36,330 --> 00:15:37,569
"..the first...'
284
00:15:37,570 --> 00:15:41,409
I can't say things like, "This is
the first day of our new lives!"
285
00:15:41,410 --> 00:15:43,609
Here she comes, now!
286
00:15:43,610 --> 00:15:44,769
Play it cool.
287
00:15:44,770 --> 00:15:47,169
I'm not cool. I'm a nervous wreck.
288
00:15:47,170 --> 00:15:48,410
She's looking good.
289
00:15:49,530 --> 00:15:51,289
Go for it! Oh...
290
00:15:51,290 --> 00:15:55,249
I really ought to be renewing
the insurance cover on my toaster.
291
00:15:55,250 --> 00:15:58,089
It's too late!
She's turned t'corner!
292
00:15:58,090 --> 00:16:00,890
It's not too late!
He can drive round t'corner!
293
00:16:02,530 --> 00:16:04,969
Oh, morning, Mrs Rossi!
294
00:16:04,970 --> 00:16:06,609
And to you!
295
00:16:06,610 --> 00:16:09,449
Are you missing
the Italian sunshine?
296
00:16:09,450 --> 00:16:11,209
Mine had a cloud in it,
297
00:16:11,210 --> 00:16:13,250
and his mother was even worse!
298
00:16:18,370 --> 00:16:19,609
Isn't that your Kath?
299
00:16:19,610 --> 00:16:21,249
Isn't that Mrs Featherstone?
300
00:16:23,050 --> 00:16:25,450
Isn't that absolutely typical!
301
00:16:31,410 --> 00:16:33,449
Wasn't that Mr Newbold's car?
302
00:16:33,450 --> 00:16:36,250
I never knew he could reverse
that fast at his age.
303
00:16:51,290 --> 00:16:52,890
I know what you're thinking.
304
00:16:53,970 --> 00:16:57,409
Why am I wasting my time
with that mangle?
305
00:16:57,410 --> 00:17:00,770
Well, you were the one
who bought it in the first place.
306
00:17:02,130 --> 00:17:04,210
Why, may I ask?
307
00:17:06,170 --> 00:17:09,490
All right, there's no need
to be snarky! Eh?
308
00:17:18,130 --> 00:17:21,169
Ruby, is this really
the life you want?
309
00:17:21,170 --> 00:17:24,209
Well, it beats washing and ironing
for some bloke.
310
00:17:24,210 --> 00:17:26,649
Well, what if we found you one
that did his own washing?
311
00:17:26,650 --> 00:17:28,049
And what about mine?
312
00:17:28,050 --> 00:17:29,729
Is he any good with your delicates?
313
00:17:29,730 --> 00:17:31,729
I mean, what's he doing here?
314
00:17:31,730 --> 00:17:33,369
We're both here for you!
315
00:17:33,370 --> 00:17:36,209
I don't like him
poking around in my life.
316
00:17:36,210 --> 00:17:39,609
Ruby, do you think you may be
neglecting your feminine side?
317
00:17:39,610 --> 00:17:41,329
I don't see why.
318
00:17:41,330 --> 00:17:43,129
I can do a short skirt.
319
00:17:43,130 --> 00:17:45,169
Guy at work said
I've got the kind of legs
320
00:17:45,170 --> 00:17:47,369
that he'd like to take somewhere
for a weekend.
321
00:17:47,370 --> 00:17:49,009
Is he one of those you hit?
322
00:17:49,010 --> 00:17:50,330
Yeah. Twice.
323
00:17:53,250 --> 00:17:54,449
This time on the move.
324
00:17:54,450 --> 00:17:55,769
One...
325
00:17:55,770 --> 00:17:57,889
One, two, three, four. Good girl!
326
00:17:57,890 --> 00:17:59,529
One, two, three, four.
327
00:17:59,530 --> 00:18:00,730
Sharpen up.
328
00:18:04,810 --> 00:18:06,250
I'm so sorry!
329
00:18:08,250 --> 00:18:09,489
She is.
330
00:18:09,490 --> 00:18:11,569
She's neglecting her feminine side.
331
00:18:11,570 --> 00:18:14,769
What she needs is the influence
of something gentler in her life.
332
00:18:14,770 --> 00:18:16,409
Like a man.
333
00:18:16,410 --> 00:18:18,010
And I know just the man.
334
00:18:20,490 --> 00:18:21,969
That's Willis.
335
00:18:21,970 --> 00:18:23,689
You'll never have to thump him.
336
00:18:23,690 --> 00:18:25,489
He looks like a wimp.
337
00:18:25,490 --> 00:18:27,369
He is a wimp.
338
00:18:27,370 --> 00:18:28,769
Just what you need!
339
00:18:28,770 --> 00:18:30,810
Someone gentle
who you can love and protect.
340
00:18:32,330 --> 00:18:33,850
What if he wants...
341
00:18:35,290 --> 00:18:36,490
..first date?
342
00:18:38,090 --> 00:18:39,370
He won't want...
343
00:18:40,570 --> 00:18:42,009
..first date.
344
00:18:42,010 --> 00:18:43,410
He's too shy.
345
00:18:45,490 --> 00:18:48,289
Have you not got anything smaller?
346
00:18:48,290 --> 00:18:51,769
With Ruby by your side,
you'll never be in fear.
347
00:18:51,770 --> 00:18:54,970
Oh, they're coming over!
They're coming over. Stay calm.
348
00:18:56,250 --> 00:18:57,610
Willis, meet Ruby.
349
00:18:59,090 --> 00:19:00,889
Not bad-looking, though.
350
00:19:00,890 --> 00:19:02,130
What you drinking?
351
00:19:03,330 --> 00:19:04,569
Er, I'll have a half.
352
00:19:04,570 --> 00:19:08,370
You'll have a pint! I won't be seen
with any muffin who drinks halves.
353
00:19:14,650 --> 00:19:17,409
Right, right, come on.
354
00:19:17,410 --> 00:19:19,770
Put it there. There.
355
00:19:22,050 --> 00:19:25,089
Another Arkwright
department opens.
356
00:19:25,090 --> 00:19:27,329
To last about as
long as that pizza.
357
00:19:27,330 --> 00:19:30,289
What are you talking about?
Look, they pressed my trousers!
358
00:19:30,290 --> 00:19:31,569
What?
359
00:19:31,570 --> 00:19:34,209
It hasn't got a crease!
360
00:19:34,210 --> 00:19:36,209
You need steam for that!
361
00:19:36,210 --> 00:19:38,649
Oh, heck.
362
00:19:38,650 --> 00:19:41,529
Hey! No, I've got the very thing!
363
00:19:41,530 --> 00:19:43,329
Hee-hee!
364
00:19:43,330 --> 00:19:44,530
Come on, out of it!
365
00:19:46,810 --> 00:19:48,570
Right, OK. Now, then.
366
00:19:50,130 --> 00:19:52,729
You wanted steam?
367
00:19:52,730 --> 00:19:56,170
Well, we're going to give it
some steam!
368
00:19:57,570 --> 00:19:59,809
Right, off you go!
369
00:19:59,810 --> 00:20:01,449
It's a powerful jet, you know.
370
00:20:01,450 --> 00:20:03,529
Well, it's all right.
They're trousers.
371
00:20:03,530 --> 00:20:07,169
They're empty, aren't they?
They haven't got any legs inside!
372
00:20:07,170 --> 00:20:09,089
Right, blast away!
373
00:20:18,970 --> 00:20:20,129
Hey!
374
00:20:20,130 --> 00:20:21,730
Hey... oh-ho-ho...!
375
00:20:25,850 --> 00:20:28,010
We're in business!
376
00:20:30,130 --> 00:20:31,849
While you wait?
377
00:20:31,850 --> 00:20:33,169
That's very good service.
378
00:20:33,170 --> 00:20:34,409
Oh, yes.
379
00:20:34,410 --> 00:20:37,489
Which you won't find elsewhere
in town.
380
00:20:37,490 --> 00:20:38,769
Er, yes?
381
00:20:38,770 --> 00:20:41,009
Where do we, er, disrobe?
382
00:20:41,010 --> 00:20:43,450
Oh! This way, gentlemen.
383
00:20:45,250 --> 00:20:47,330
Welcome to our fitting room.
384
00:20:51,370 --> 00:20:54,409
Well, we thought you'd probably
have somewhere...
385
00:20:54,410 --> 00:20:56,050
..well, less exposed.
386
00:20:57,850 --> 00:21:00,329
I'm not comfortable
with the word "exposed".
387
00:21:00,330 --> 00:21:01,969
Yeah, well, look, don't worry.
388
00:21:01,970 --> 00:21:04,849
Nobody can see you below the waist.
389
00:21:04,850 --> 00:21:08,449
And anyway, this is
our introductory offer
390
00:21:08,450 --> 00:21:11,650
at unrepeatable prices.
391
00:21:25,450 --> 00:21:26,969
Ah! There we are.
392
00:21:26,970 --> 00:21:28,369
Right, thank you.
393
00:21:28,370 --> 00:21:29,570
I won't be long.
394
00:21:40,970 --> 00:21:42,169
Hello.
395
00:21:42,170 --> 00:21:43,450
Hello. Hello. Hello.
396
00:21:44,610 --> 00:21:46,649
And how are you, Mr Newbold?
397
00:21:46,650 --> 00:21:49,009
I'm well, thank you.
398
00:21:49,010 --> 00:21:50,290
As I hope you are.
399
00:21:51,530 --> 00:21:52,929
Granville not in?
400
00:21:52,930 --> 00:21:54,769
In the back. Yeah, won't be long.
401
00:21:54,770 --> 00:21:56,089
Er...
402
00:21:56,090 --> 00:21:57,810
..where does he keep the pasta?
403
00:22:00,210 --> 00:22:01,889
I want you to know, Mrs Rossi,
404
00:22:01,890 --> 00:22:04,969
that I would normally be
at your service...
405
00:22:04,970 --> 00:22:06,289
Please don't worry.
406
00:22:06,290 --> 00:22:07,529
I'll...
407
00:22:07,530 --> 00:22:09,609
I'll pop back later. No! No...
408
00:22:09,610 --> 00:22:10,889
..wait!
409
00:22:10,890 --> 00:22:14,250
I can't let you go
without some sort of explanation.
410
00:22:25,690 --> 00:22:28,729
You shall have your rigatoni,
Mrs Rossi.
411
00:22:28,730 --> 00:22:32,050
Even if it kills any respect
you may have for me.
412
00:22:33,330 --> 00:22:37,010
Boxers and suspenders, Mr Newbold.
413
00:22:38,450 --> 00:22:43,130
It's good to be home again
after the racier fashions of Italy.
414
00:22:47,770 --> 00:22:49,209
Ah... I...
415
00:22:49,210 --> 00:22:52,049
Oh! Mrs Rossi!
416
00:22:52,050 --> 00:22:54,690
I see you've met more of Mr Newbold.
417
00:22:56,330 --> 00:22:58,969
Don't worry, we'll soon have him
back in his trousers
418
00:22:58,970 --> 00:23:02,450
before you can say,
"What is this business coming to?"
419
00:23:05,650 --> 00:23:07,289
Ciao.
420
00:23:07,290 --> 00:23:08,690
Ciao!
421
00:23:12,810 --> 00:23:15,810
Don't worry!
They'll loosen up with wear.
422
00:23:40,890 --> 00:23:42,210
Right, come along.
423
00:23:44,250 --> 00:23:45,689
Tell me again...
424
00:23:45,690 --> 00:23:47,490
Why am I riding a mangle?
425
00:23:49,370 --> 00:23:53,209
Well, primarily
because I don't know anyone
426
00:23:53,210 --> 00:23:55,169
more suggestible.
427
00:23:55,170 --> 00:23:56,490
Oh, thank you!
428
00:23:57,890 --> 00:24:01,929
Right, now, what I want you to do
is you'll be riding gently
429
00:24:01,930 --> 00:24:05,009
through the town
and drawing attention
430
00:24:05,010 --> 00:24:07,490
to our new mobile pressing service.
431
00:24:09,050 --> 00:24:10,649
Did I ought to tell Madge?
432
00:24:10,650 --> 00:24:12,129
No, no, I'll tell her for you.
433
00:24:12,130 --> 00:24:13,889
Right, come on. On board. Right.
434
00:24:13,890 --> 00:24:15,370
Up we go!
435
00:24:16,530 --> 00:24:18,169
Oh, steady.
436
00:24:18,170 --> 00:24:20,289
Mangles are not well sprung.
437
00:24:20,290 --> 00:24:21,449
Stand by.
438
00:24:26,730 --> 00:24:28,729
Right, now, slowly, right?
439
00:24:28,730 --> 00:24:30,769
Don't jerk it.
440
00:24:30,770 --> 00:24:33,169
Now, be firm with him, Beth.
441
00:24:33,170 --> 00:24:35,849
Keep his mind on what he's doing.
442
00:24:35,850 --> 00:24:37,849
I do a good "firm", Mr Arkwright.
443
00:24:37,850 --> 00:24:39,529
Mm, she's not joking.
444
00:24:39,530 --> 00:24:41,729
She's like a black widow
in training.
445
00:24:43,010 --> 00:24:45,849
What have they talked him into now?!
446
00:24:45,850 --> 00:24:48,689
Why is he always flirting
with danger?
447
00:24:48,690 --> 00:24:49,849
Well, he flirts with you.
448
00:24:49,850 --> 00:24:51,290
It's pretty much the same thing.
449
00:25:03,250 --> 00:25:05,049
Where's the Mini gone?!
450
00:25:05,050 --> 00:25:06,210
It went that way!
451
00:25:07,970 --> 00:25:10,169
I'll kill that Leroy!
452
00:25:10,170 --> 00:25:12,689
His eyes are full of that vegan!
453
00:25:12,690 --> 00:25:14,529
You haven't got a cushion, have you?
454
00:25:14,530 --> 00:25:16,089
Cushions are extra.
455
00:25:16,090 --> 00:25:19,089
That steam gets to where
you think it never could reach!
456
00:25:19,090 --> 00:25:20,129
Yeah.
457
00:25:20,130 --> 00:25:21,529
He'll be back.
458
00:25:21,530 --> 00:25:23,969
Once he finds
that you're not behind.
459
00:25:23,970 --> 00:25:26,049
Behind? Yeah,
it's getting hot already!
460
00:25:26,050 --> 00:25:29,089
That's the steam! You've got to
keep up the steam pressure!
461
00:25:29,090 --> 00:25:30,489
I think we're, um...
462
00:25:30,490 --> 00:25:32,329
Yeah, don't worry about that...
463
00:25:32,330 --> 00:25:35,169
..moving. Yep, I were right,
we're moving! Where are you going?
464
00:25:35,170 --> 00:25:36,889
What do you care?
465
00:25:36,890 --> 00:25:39,009
There's no steering!
466
00:25:39,010 --> 00:25:40,849
There's no brakes?!
467
00:25:40,850 --> 00:25:41,850
Oh!
468
00:25:43,690 --> 00:25:45,529
Argh!
469
00:25:45,530 --> 00:25:47,730
Can't stop! CAN'T STOP!
470
00:25:54,450 --> 00:25:56,489
Oops.
471
00:25:56,490 --> 00:25:58,329
You were supposed to be looking!
472
00:25:58,330 --> 00:25:59,529
I thought you were looking?
473
00:25:59,530 --> 00:26:01,329
I was looking at you.
474
00:26:01,330 --> 00:26:02,370
I noticed that.
475
00:26:03,610 --> 00:26:05,409
You're doing it again.
476
00:26:05,410 --> 00:26:07,649
Well, you talk to yourself
when you're driving.
477
00:26:07,650 --> 00:26:09,289
I do not!
478
00:26:09,290 --> 00:26:11,169
Your lips were moving.
479
00:26:11,170 --> 00:26:13,369
Well, if you've got a problem
with moving lips,
480
00:26:13,370 --> 00:26:15,609
I can show you how to stop them.
I know how to stop them.
481
00:26:31,090 --> 00:26:34,289
I can't stop! Help! Help!
482
00:26:34,290 --> 00:26:35,809
Follow that mangle!
483
00:26:47,050 --> 00:26:48,489
Help!
484
00:26:48,490 --> 00:26:50,049
Whoa! Ooh! Ooh!
485
00:27:03,770 --> 00:27:08,409
I'm going to close
our new home pressing service
486
00:27:08,410 --> 00:27:11,410
before the police press charges.
487
00:27:12,610 --> 00:27:15,290
Drying without due care
and attention.
488
00:27:23,850 --> 00:27:26,689
I'm going to have to face facts.
489
00:27:26,690 --> 00:27:30,530
That steamer does cause
slight shrinkage.
490
00:27:48,210 --> 00:27:49,609
Fish and chips?
491
00:27:49,610 --> 00:27:50,849
Yes!
492
00:27:50,850 --> 00:27:53,049
I'll have to change these trousers.
493
00:27:53,050 --> 00:27:55,449
They're on their last legs.
494
00:27:55,450 --> 00:27:56,929
I can wait.
495
00:27:56,930 --> 00:27:59,409
Madge is busy shouting at Gastric.
496
00:27:59,410 --> 00:28:02,409
They're getting on much better
these days. Oh!
497
00:28:02,410 --> 00:28:04,289
What about us?
498
00:28:04,290 --> 00:28:06,129
I can't decide.
499
00:28:06,130 --> 00:28:08,529
What do you mean you can't decide?
500
00:28:08,530 --> 00:28:10,090
Do I want vinegar?
501
00:28:12,010 --> 00:28:15,809
Oh, well, we'll get one with
and one without.
502
00:28:15,810 --> 00:28:17,649
Sorted!
503
00:28:17,650 --> 00:28:19,729
How do you do it?
504
00:28:19,730 --> 00:28:22,329
I don't know,
must be these trousers.
505
00:28:22,330 --> 00:28:24,570
They don't leave any room for doubt.
35141
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