Original subtitles

BORDER BETWEEN TURKEY AND SYRIA

We have finally crossed the border.

All right!

- There are buses going to Idlib. - Cool!

From there we'll go to Afrin.

Are there buses from Idlib?

Yes.

May Allah help you.

- Calm down! - If something goes wrong, call me.

I'm very worried.

Giving me a call!

May Allah hear you.

Try to call me!

Take care, and take care of Salam.

Good luck.

It has been unexpected.

Everything has gone wrong.

It's like climbing to the top of a mountain...

and plummet...

on the other side.

But everything that happened was better than going to jail.

Or lock myself inside myself.

ISTANBUL

SIX MONTHS BEFORE

Look at me. Look at me.

Look at my hand, please.

Yes thanks.

I was born in a small Syrian village.

There I spent my childhood and my adolescence.

I lived with my family.

Being a man, I had no other choice...

My family is very conservative.

In the past, my life seemed like a disease to me.

I looked in the mirror and hated myself.

Why am I like this?

I wanted to be a good person...

and that implies being heterosexual.

When I saw someone gay, I asked the others...

" Is there a cure for these people?

" Why did Allah create them like this?

"Can it not be cured? "

Everyone said the same thing.

"Yes, if you read the Koran and get married.

"And keep yourself in control, and work a lot. "

I tried everything.

But I did not heal.

I'm afraid to stay stuck.

Not getting ahead.

That scares me.

The group 'Tea and Talk' helped me change.

Listening to others helped me accept.

It's the only Syrian gay support group.

Welcome. I'm Mahmoud.

You will know me from my Arab gay magazine.

Today I will address some of the questions...

you have put to me...

about Mr. Gay Syria and his organization.

I've already started to organize the trip to Malta.

The contest will be there, in April.

Mr. Gay Syria will represent the Syrian LGBT.

In particular, the refugees.

Mr. Gay Syria is a refugee.

After suffering a lot, he has escaped from the country.

He is the only refugee of Mr. Gay World.

Whoever becomes Mr. Gay Syria...

must look you in the eye...

and promise to share your sadness with the world.

We laugh and smoke..

But your sadness It is dismaying,

like footprints of physical and psychological violence.

I hope that whoever goes to Europe...

makes love, marries and does not forget us.

I could create a web page to make the world aware.

We are all survivors.

In some way, we have survived.

There is so much oppression in our society.

Have you heard of the Mr. Gay World contest?

I arrived here two years ago, but I heard about him recently.

I am 23 years old.

I have discovered many new things.

I used to live in Syria, in the countryside.

Why do you want to participate?

Is it because of courage, or out of desperation?

Let's say that despair has made me brave.

Beautiful response.

When you have problems and you are desperate...

you have to find a solution.

Since I was born, I have worn a mask.

But now I must show my true face.

If not, I will always live in despair.

What kind of reaction do you expect?

I do not care about the reactions.

I worry about losing my parents.

That is all. The rest does not scare me.

- Do you think you can handle it? - I think so.

Have you prepared a performance?

You will be on stage alone.

If I'm going to be alone...

it will be a message for my mother.

Turn your head to this side, please.

Upwards.

Look through the camera.

- Thank you. - You are welcome.

What is your talent?

Dance.

But not Oriental dance.

It is a more expressionist style.

With high-heels.

I want my family to know who I am

Let them know in a less shocking way.

I'll tell you little by little.

Tell them that, if you become Mr. Gay Syria...

you'll be Syria's most handsome gay man. Surely they'll accept that.

Who goes to Malta...

will come with me to Germany, where we will ask for asylum.

- Cannot it be in Norway? - And a reunion.

Do you want to go with your boyfriend to Norway?

It's possible.

In Europe you will be fine as a cook.

Are you a professional chef?

Yes, ask Bradley how I cook

I do not know whether to trust his taste.

How are you going to prepare for the contest?

I will dance every day.

Dancing is a sport.

Good, guys.

- Now the two. - Step two?

Yes, step two.

But in rumba mode.

- The boys wear baggy pants. - Like this?

In some places they carry them like that, wide.

- Are you single? - Yes

- Are you gay? - No.

- Do you work? - Yes.

Always the same questions.

He looks so much like you.

Maybe that happens to me when you leave.

You try to convert a drama in entertainment.

It is not entertainment.

It is to change the perception.

Only ISIS has shown the Syrian gays.

How can we change that?

How do we focus attention on the people?

The gay Syrians are just...

those who die in the videos of ISIS.

Even if you collect the money for Mr. Gay World...

there will still be vagabond gays sleeping under a bridge.

But I do it for them.

Well, do not participate.

I am convinced.

But people should know what happens on the street.

I believe in this.

But I want people to see...

what happens in the world.

And how do you plan to do it?

Yes, despite everything, there is a Syrian...

who participates in Mr. Gay World...

people will think that there is a community...

which has elected a representative.

And after that?

Do you think my work will end after Mr. Gay World?

If that's your plan, all right. Let me eat.

Please. Please.

He's German.

I speak German.

By Allah.

It's not very hard.

The first thing I see is that you have vision.

I knew, Mr. Gay World is the right decision.

Will you let me continue?

I have something in mind.

You have a vision

In Arabic that means to have a distant vision.

- In the distance. - Yes

I can tell you that...

I see a red carpet under your feet.

Or maybe black, like the color of this coffee.

I see you wearing a hat.

After so much trouble...

you will greet people with pride.

Today we have here...

the journalist Mahmoud Hassino.

He lives in Germany, but he is visiting Istanbul.

I am a refugee in Berlin.

I love Istanbul.

I've always wanted live in that city.

I visited it before the Syrian civil war.

I have always loved this place.

This is for us to find Mr. Gay Syria.

And...

so that Mr. Gay Syria will win Mr. Gay World.

But first, get the visa.

In order to win Mr. Gay World.

Mom, there are so many things I want to tell you.

Count to three.

One two three.

Just a moment.

How are you going to get a gift like that?

I need a bag.

Right now I don't need it.

It's just a rehearsal.

I will not do that in my performance.

Is it okay?

- No. - Damn you!

You have not convinced me.

Mom, I'm Hussein. Your eldest son

The one that fills you with pride.

The you get on with so well.

Happy Mother's Day.

I need to tell you what happened to me yesterday.

Dad hit me and threw me out of the house.

He told me he was not his son anymore.

I refused to marry my cousin.

Mom, I cannot marry her.

It is not her fault.

I cannot offer her anything.

It's transparent.

Let's see.

Do you like it?

What a pity that it won't make noise.

If you are not dancing!

I need the small size.

Medium will fit you well.

Try it on.

Great!

- Do I look like Mr. Gay Syria? - It marks your wrinkles.

No, it's great.

You need a fan.

Nader...

What are you doing?

I love you so.

I have gained weight.

Indeed.

But if I go to dance classes.

But you have dinner at midnight.

Look at your belly.

I'm not saying I'm thin.

Do you like to be fat?

Let me. I'm busy.

When I try it on, tell me how it looks on me.

- Have you rehearsed the performance? - Of course.

And the questions?

There is an examination at three.

A test type examen, most about things...

what we learned in Tea and Talk.

What kind of things?

Things related to LGBT.

It's not a crime in Jordan, but yes in Lebanon.

And maybe in Egypt.

Yes, haven't you read the news?

But they do not say it's unnatural.

The Arab countries that they do not penalize...

are Jordan and Bahrain.

Is it here?

In about 130 countries around the world...

the law is imprecise, somehow.

Some do not penalize it.

In Iran and Saudi Arabia they kill gays.

There are seven or eight countries...

- Are you sure it's here? - Yes.

And some African countries.

And in Turkey?

There is no oppression.

There are no laws that penalize it.

But they do not protect the gays either.

There you cannot get married.

As in some European countries.

We should seek asylum on another planet.

And what would we do there?

I love this street...

It reminds me of ancient Damascus.

Look at the cobblestones.

And the mosque.

It fills my heart with happiness.

Let's find a house here.

But if you're going to leave soon.

I do not know what I will do.

Do you think that, in the future...

there will come a time when...

many Syrians can say...

"I'm gay and it's not a problem"?

Do you expect that...

they'll enact laws that defend the homosexuality?

No, I do not expect it.

Because we are the hope.

There are no signs of progress.

It's crazy

Look at the war, on the other side of the border..

There are people who suffer, wounded, dead.

Help me understand the message.

It is my way of thinking about another plan to support...

LGBT refugees in neighboring countries.

How many guests do you expect tomorrow?

I do not know, about 30 or 40.

We have not announced it. It's just for your...

- Security? - ISIS.

It is everywhere!

I do not want innocent people to die...

for the contest.

Put a cushion under it, like a crown.

Ok, do it.

- What is that for? - To have more ornaments.

- I want it to hang from there. - As if it were snow?

I'm very nervous.

Why? Do not be silly.

Relax.

The pubic is good. The judges are your friends.

Do not be overwhelmed.

The first one is Issam.

The second, Wissam.

Third, Omar.

Fourth, Hussein.

And William.

If I make it to Mr. Gay World as Mr. Gay Syria...

I would like to support the LGBT community.

I want all Arab gays...

who live in war zones...

to receive all possible support.

Be it financial or psychological.

I will help them to get out of their situation...

and to settle in a place where gays are accepted.

I want to thank Nader.

He was the one...

who encouraged me to participate.

Happy Valentine's Day.

Sum, take it!

It's for you, Suma.

They say that the dead hear their loved ones.

And also...

that no mother hates her son.

Mom, I'm Hussein...

your eldest son

The one that fills you with pride.

The you get on with best.

It's Mother's Day.

This is for you.

Mom, I should have told you so many things...

but death separated us.

I wanted to tell you what I really felt...

something that I have carried inside since I was born.

But I was afraid.

Fear of my father and my brothers.

I was afraid for you and for me.

But I do not care anymore.

You are the first one I tell it to.

Mom, dad hit me yesterday.

Yes mom. I'm gay.

Be proud of me.

I'll give you the chair!

We came to have fun, not to cry.

To make ourselves stronger, we should not forget the pain.

I'm hard to impress.

You are magnificent

You have spoken of pain and grief.

That I wanted to express.

First of all, I just want to say...

that these are men bravest in the world.

Well, Mr. Gay Syria.

Mr. Gay Syria will wear a tiara...

and not a crown!

Mr. Gay Syria...

is the fourth contestant, Hussein.

All of us, my brothers, my parents...

we enter Turkey illegally...

through a small village.

My father's friend helped him find an apartment.

I work and live in the center, one hour from my house.

I live my life six days a week...

but when I come back on my day off...

I cannot be myself.

I become the person that my family wants it to be.

At my family's house, I live with my wife, my daughter...

my parents and my brothers.

My big fear is that they discover...

that I am Mr. Gay Syria.

I fear for my daughter.

Here, it is a disgrace.

- Who is my love? - Me.

And my little girl?

Who is my love?

- You are happy? - Yes

Smell her.

Smell her.

Let me smell her.

No.

Give me your hand.

When I'm with Salam...

I do not stop thinking: when will I tell him that I'm gay?

How old will he be?

Will you accept it?

I try to convince myself that yes.

It's so sweet when he calls me Daddy.

Daddy daddy...

It is a beautiful feeling.

A feeling without end.

Even if he gets older, I'll feel it.

Yes my love.

You have slept?

Go to sleep, sleep...

BERLIN

ADVISORY FOR GAYS

You kiss like a Lebanese.

Maybe that's why the authorities think you're lying.

The interpretor terrified you.

Mrs. Jasem.

I got the numbers and dates wrong, can happen to anyone.

I told them you were born...

in Homs, Syria.

I have no doubt that you are Syrian.

Because I am Syrian and I recognize your accent.

I wrote that you have a problem with numbers.

So I said there could be...

some contradictions in your story...

but that it was due to psychological stress.

The idea is...

what we have asked that they approve your asylum.

Sausage.

A man who comes from Syria...

and lives here since 2014.

Let's give a big round of applause...

to Mahmoud Hassino.

Come here.

Are you Mr. Syria?

- Well, no. - No?

No. I organize the contest.

He is the organizer of Mr. Gay Syria.

We celebrate the event In Istanbul...

because right now it is impossible to hold it in Syria.

The main idea of the contest...

was to launch a campaign to relocate to the LGBT Syrians of Turkey.

With the increasing homophobia there...

LGBT refugees suffer.

With the rise of homophobia...

the situation of LGBT Syrians in Turkey it has gotten worse.

Is this the queue for passports?

It is the queue for everything.

My number is 139.

Only 40 people get served daily.

Four days to my turn.

People sleep on the sidewalk.

I'm here to do the photo for the visa.

Hello Love. I'm having my picture taken for the visa.

I have to fill in the papers of Mr. Gay World.

They will start the application.

Do not smile.

Do not put me too much.

Just a little.

- First name... - First name.

Your name.

First name.

The nationality is Syrian.

Do you have a company? Do you work?

Here is something about a company.

Company?

Enter name and address

What do they mean?

Do you have telefax?

Do you know what a fax is?

I will buy one.

I'm in a bad mood.

I wanted to kill myself.

Yesterday I slept...

and I did not hear your call.

I showered and I waited.

One week after the contest...

The UN moved Nader to Norway.

The last days were a mixture of joy and grief.

Did they give him a flat?

Yes, and he is happy.

- Is he allowed to work? - No.

And the residence?

He's working on it.

It will take a month.

So everything goes well.

What have you been doing these days?

Now you are single.

I am not single!

Look at this, bitch!

What do you think it is?

I am not single.

- Do you study or work? - Study.

- Do you want me to study? - Sure!

I'm very tired.

The trip gives me a bad spine.

- How pessimistic you are! - I'm not pessimistic.

I do not have a passport yet.

Do not move your head!

I'm tired, please.

Are you afraid?

Yes.

When you leave?

First I need the passport.

You still don't have it?

I'll have it, but I'm worried about the visa.

Come to Tea and Talk.

We will discuss important issues.

And my work?

The agreement between...

Europe and Turkey on refugees.

Put your hand away!

I feel like I'm in a pool.

Comb it with wax.

Hi, Nader. I'm Hussein.

I miss you.

I'm cutting Omar's hair.

Hi, sweethearts...

Please, cut his hair so he's handsome.

To the right!

I'm giving it volume.

Handsome!

Don't say you've given me a pigtail, right?

No, I didn't do that.

- Do not mess it up. - Shut up!

You will undo it.

That's better.

- Hello. - Hello.

- How are you? - Good, and you?

Aren't you going to blow the candle?

Okay. One, two.

Make a wish.

Make a wish.

Did you make a wish?

I did.

One, two.

Kiss Me.

I'm going to eat it.

Maybe it's more beautiful when the sun rises.

But I'm afraid not.

Syria was beautiful.

There were mountains, like Mount Qasioun.

Today, people still talk about its beauty.

This breeze is nothing compared to there.

The height did not scare us.

But they came and destroyed everything.

Now we are afraid.

Why do I take photos of you on a rooftop? I explain it to you.

I'm doing a series of photos, little by little...

of Syrians, Syrian gays, in places...

from which ISIS would abduct them.

They reflect that, but they are positive, they represent...

that they are still alive, survive and they are in Istanbul.

It is an inspiring and optimistic reflection, at the same time dark.

- Do you understand the idea? - Yes

Look up.

Look at the sun

Daddy, we miss you.

Mr. Gay World encouraged me to participate in Mr. Gay Syria.

The most important is...

Mahmoud, what do you want?

Hi. I'm Hussein Sabat...

Mr. Syria

I live in Istanbul and I'm a barber.

I wanted to study theater, because I love acting.

But with the war in Syria, I could not do it.

I am nervous.

Do not give me orders. Leave me alone.

What matters is...

that the LGBT Syrians rise up and show their faces to the world.

We will talk peacefully...

and we will sing slogans.

We just want to express...

that we exist

We will not only be Syrians...

there will also be many Turks.

The parade helps our community

and the organizers to campaign.

- It's Mr. Gay Syria. - Ah, hello!

- We've heard about you. - It's great, congratulations.

And you have not heard about me?

I was third, but I'm more famous than him.

HETERO MEN, YOUNGSTERS, WHITES AND MIDDLE CLASS...

FOR DIVERSITY

"I'm gay. This is my identity. "

" We exist. Accept us. "

"I want to live. "

Where are you, my love?

I am here, my love.

Where are you, my love?

I am here, my love.

For the first time, I would wish not to be Arab or Turkish.

Members of the press, do not hinder us

We will not disperse! We are here!

Watch out!

Where are you, my love? I am here, my love.

And the key?

How much is left?

How are you?

I woke up worried.

I did not mind doing nothing.

But I think that it's embarrassing on my part.

But hey, of course we'll go.

If Allah wants.

My friend Hussam has called me.

He is a BBC journalist...

Do they want to interview me?

For the BBC?

Yes.

- Nice to meet you. - Charmed.

There is a cafeteria where can we do the interview

We can do the interview, but...

- Where do you want to record it? - In the barbershop.

I do not want to be recorded.

Tell them it's for the BBC. That everyone sees them.

If he stays in Turkey...

he'll have problems if you record it.

So he will not do it unless he has the visa.

And if they give it to you?

Then you can record me.

- Will you sollicit one? - I'm waiting for it.

You have to continue...

and appear in the media.

If you're not going to take a chance, Wissam will replace you.

Will you keep me safe?

- I cannot guarantee anything. - Then, it's over.

You can get out it...

and that Wissam becomes in Mr. Gay Syria.

- Can we explain why? - Go ahead.

Wissam has no family, mine is here.

When the war started in Syria...

my family wanted me to join the rebellion.

They called me...

to tell me that if I wouldn't do it, I'd deserve to die.

But those bullets stayed in Syria.

- Bullets are cheaper here. - Right.

EMBASSY OF MALTA

You have an eye pencil.

- Where? - Here.

- You never put it on? - No.

Boys!

There are no visas.

Why?

I don't know, because they have a Syrian passport.

The Maltese police have seen him...

and has said no.

Why?

Malta does not want to give visas to Syrians.

- Do you want a handkerchief? - I will not cry.

Mr. Gay Syria.

- I'm not. - No?

He did not get the visa.

I'm Syrian, but I organized the contest.

- I'm going to write that. - I came to represent it.

Have you seen them?

I have seen some. It is delicious!

- Very good. - Yes

I am too.

And me. From the shoulder up.

- I'll win. - Sell yourself. Exactly.

Athletic challenge: done.

Suit: done.

I don't have a suit

I just wanted to do it to give Syria a face, to give it visibility.

- Got it. - But it doen't matter.

Not here. Syria is not here.

- Here is a Syrian man. - Yes, but he is not...

Mr. Gay Syria.

- I cannot do everything. - I'm not asking you that.

If the governments prevent me, I cannot do anything.

- What is his name? - His name is Hussein.

- Hussein. - If you could...

Hussein.

Yes. It would be very nice if you send him a message

OK. One, two and three. Hussein!

Hello, Syria! What a pity you have not come.

We think of you and we wish you were here.

Keep fighting. We are proud of you!

- We wish you the best. - Thanks.

He's from Britain, but his father is Sudanese.

Everyone says you should have been there

Open the presents.

Why are you back?

This is from Canada.

And this from Brazil.

Let's have fun.

This is from India.

Is beautiful.

And this from Taiwan.

The chocolates, I don't know where they are from.

Where will I put all this?

It has not been worth it.

The media has not covered it.

Because the organization did not let them in.

I told them I was going in name of Mr. Gay Syria.

Because they had not given you the visa.

I want to tell you something.

I have organized all this alone.

I cannot give you anything. I am a refugee, like you.

Maybe in a better country...

but I am a refugee.

I can help you if you tell me...

" Mahmoud, I need this. " We can try.

And we can succeed or fail.

- Is that the only one? - There's only this one.

Is it going to hurt?

It is done?

The earring made me feel...

that I'm free.

That I can do whatever I want with my body.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, HUSSEIN "MR. GAY SYRIA"

I've never felt like this.

When I won the title and when I could not travel.

Two opposite feelings. The best and the worst.

This is because of what I've been through.

This year I have suffered many disappointments.

No travel, no getting the papers.

I have become strong to face them.

If I was weak, I would have collapsed.

I would have abandoned everything.

But I still have hope...

and I'm ready for whatever comes.

Hi.

Do you have a moment?

I hope it's something good.

- What's up? - Nothing.

Hello.

Hello.

I am from the UN Agency for the Ankara refugees.

- Who am I speaking with? - Omar Al Katib.

Congratulations, We have accepted your request.

I told you that you would not have to wait a lot.

You see?

You are going to reunite with your husband.

I hope you too.

And Wissam and everyone else.

Damn you.

Sky...

Don't make me pay the last haircut.

For you it is always free.

Thank you.

How lucky you are.

Take care.

I have not told anyone...

so do not tell.

I will not.

I'm glad for you!

When you leave?

I do not know yet. In the next six months.

Cool.

Surely you will not be long.

Lucky. Your husband is waiting for you.

My love!

Welcome to our house.

Stop.

Show me the bed.

- It's not mounted. - I want to see.

These are the mattresses.

What is that?

I love you

And the prayer?

That's it.

May Allah allow me to leave soon.

That I don't have to wait more than a month.

Nader is going to ask a bigger apartment?

I don't know what happens at home.

We have to go and see.

I have picked up the phone.

"Yes mom?"

"What's up?"

And she told me: "Your father is angry."

"What have you done?"

And I say: "I don't know."

I've 'played dumb'.

"If you do not want to be as you were before...

your father will kill you.

He will poison you."

What if he has poison at home?

I will call you.

No, I will call you.

Let me call you.

I'll call you when I get to the door.

So you can hear everything.

I'll hide the phone.

What if I make noise?

- You won't. - But someone can.

Mute the microphone

It seems a good neighborhood.

What do you say? Here they gave me a beating.

They almost killed me.

I'm afraid to walk around here.

I swear, it was just a joke.

It was not real.

Please, listen to me.

I swear I'm not lying.

I swear that..

Swear by the Koran...

that you're not gay!

You swear it!

At least, you are safe.

It has started by asking me if he was gay.

And my mother saying what does 'faggot" mean.

I'm a fag.

I have started to tremble.

I didn't know what to do.

My goodness!

I'm 24 years old.

Is it okay that my father hit me at my age?

- And your wife? - She hasn't said anything.

She locked herself up and cried.

Poor thing.

Be patient.

I cannot. It is impossible.

I've thrown it all away.

He wants me to stay away from my gay friends.

I cannot be straight, I'm not like that.

Why did I participate in Mr. Gay Syria?

To leave Turkey and save my daughter.

I do not want her to grow in a country where everything is forbidden

I want her to be free, that she won't be forced.

I participated in order to leave, but I could not.

Ask the UN.

They have rejected my request.

Try again.

I came back when they beat me, but they rejected me again.

Why don't you escape by the sea?

They have closed the borders.

At first, I wanted to do a relocation campaign.

Prohibited!

Forget it!

In Europe they hate refugees.

I spoke with Allout.

- The American organization? - Yes

They said: " What is your urgency? "

They just killed a gay Syrian in Turkey.

Is there anything more urgent than that?

What do they understand by 'urgency' in that country?

Do not think much about it.

Nobody does, or will do anything for the LGBT Syrians

I live in Germany...

I have work and everything is going well.

I work for an organization based in Berlin.

My future is safe there.

And why do I do this? Because I care.

Have you spent five years like this?

What's the problem?

None, but...

I'm Mahmoud, I can only worry for the LGBT cause.

After all the effort...

we cannot allow that do not accept our rights.

Are we going to stand on the sidelines?

No, that's what you do, but I don't!

It's five years, Mahmoud.

Five or ten...

until they accept the LGBT Syrians, this will be my cause.

I don't believe it, I must be dreaming.

Don't you feel warm?

Take a deep breath.

Take this.

Breathe

When my father discovered that he was gay...

just like I left my family...

to live my life...

my wife left me...

and returned home to her family.

I was a victim of this society...

which does not accept that you're gay...

and my wife was a victim too.

For her, it was better to go back to Syria.

She has family there.

For her, Turkey was like a prison.

She had to live in a house that was not hers.

She felt imprisoned with my family.

Where are we going?

To Afrin.

Where are we going?

What?

Where are we going?

Kiss Me.

The situation in Syria is bad...

but she is in a safe place.

There are no air attacks there, no bombs.

It's a small town near Turkey.

I hope that tomorrow be better than yesterday.

It's the most optimistic thing I can say.

You have to look forward.

And that's it.