Original subtitles

Jesus Christ.

Pretty neato.

Super neato.

Oh, look at these munchkins.

Hey!

What is it?

Hey, it's a sparkle bear.

The dangerous sparkle bear!

Stop with the sparkle bear. Stop revving him up.

Go play over there so I can take some more pictures. Walking feet.

Walking feet. Be careful. That's right.

I want a nice shot there.

Is it really necessary? Do we need more pictures? We need a lot more pictures.

It's adorable.

Come on. Lighten up.

Go all this way.

No,

no, no. Don't do that. Okay, yeah, that's a little crazy. Stop being so

girl. Come over here. Put your buns on the bunion.

Be careful. It's wet. Don't get wet. A little wet never kills anybody.

Come on. Lift it up.

All right, here we go.

And wave to the camera.

Say, I love family vacation.

What? No, what I'm trying to say is it doesn't matter what he's lying to you

about. The issue is that he's even lying to you in the first place.

I have no reason to discuss my fiancé. If he didn't want me to know about his

embarrassing weekend job, then maybe he just shouldn't have been hired by

someone we know. Just wait three months after the wedding, and boom, you'll find

out about the secret family, the offshore bank accounts, the drug cartel

syndicate, or an affair.

Put in complete faith in anyone that's just crazy.

Sometimes for love, you just gotta go a little crazy.

Yeah, like you're no crazy.

Oh, mom's calling you. Oh, what? Uh, how do I get this off? Yeah.

This one?

I don't know. That one.

That one is for you.

That is the one that I have.

That arrow.

Hi, mom.

Carla, is everything okay? Yes, we're fine. What does the gas meter say? It

we're fine.

Where's Marla?

Oh, she's here. Is Marla? She's not talking. I don't hear her. You know, you

need to watch out for each other. He says hi.

I just don't trust places like that. Not after what happened to your father. I

worry about you two. Yes, okay.

Johnny, find a better job than dressing up as a silly Bigfoot man. Mom.

Tell Marlowe to keep an eye on you and don't give up.

What? Except what?

Mom?

Mom? Mom?

Mom?

Well, thank you, sister.

Actually, we really did lose reception.

Thank you, nature.

Delirious.

Jesus Christ.

This is exactly why we have lawyers, Chester. The real Sasquatch doesn't

property lines, so why should I?

I got half a dozen kids coming here later. You want to shoot them, too? Just

give me 20 more minutes, Lou. That's all I need. I'm on to a scent that is the

real deal, the big one, the bona fide.

The judge said no matter what scent you detect, you are not allowed to hunt

mythical creatures.

On the grounds of a family vacation destination. I'm not in this hunt for

kill, Lou. I'm in it for the victory. The big B, the big.

Come in, Agatha.

What's up, Lou?

Chester.

Again. Let me talk to him.

Chester.

Chester.

What? It is such a beautiful day out today. Don't make me destroy you.

And you're not fooling anyone.

Life is full of disappointments. The past is past.

Get over it and get on with your life. Mother Nature is your only woman now.

Don't piss me off. I will get the custom valves again.

Go home.

A woman on the radio in the gentle forest silence is like diarrhea in a

pool.

Thank you.

Grow a pair, Lou.

Keep it up, Chief.

You are all mine.

You're my bitch.

You're my bitch.

You are my bitch. Here we go.

Ethan, I have a boner.

I want to get her on my waterbed and part her Red Sea like Moses.

Nice.

I just want to pound her in the butt. There we go.

Weird.

Enjoying the show, boys?

Speaking of Red Seas... My leniency has limited...

Go.

Johnny!

Safe. Safe, wouldn't you know it.

There were some problems with your start paperwork.

Did you write that form?

No. Because that's a really confusing form. Yeah, I know.

No, it's like literally another language at some point. I know, and I'm sorry.

So, why don't you meet me at your car tonight after shift ends and

we'll go over it together.

You want to go over paperwork at my car?

So this is where the American dream died.

Oh, be nice.

You know why this place hasn't been suicide bombed yet?

Because it's a pain in the ass to get to?

Look on the bright side. This is our first real family vacation.

You know?

Take a look around, see the sights.

Say it with me.

We love... Come on.

We love family. It's not going to work. Try again.

Maybe Johnny has some hot guy friends. Hot and dumb.

I know your type.

Well, we can only hope.

And who knows? Maybe after a couple of party treats, this place might be a

little fun.

You know, I really appreciate you coming here with me tonight. Can you promise

me you're not going to get too toasty?

No promises.

Marla!

Marla, I'm serious.

Come on, slowpoke.

Oh, there he is.

Whatever she said to you, new guy, it was a lie.

Don't be fooled by her womanly trickery, yo. Yo, sweetheart, you're so dry.

I take it you learned from experience.

All right, Stidmarks, sit down.

First off, Slavko wrote a new routine.

Oh, my God.

Holy vomit, man. That's like the fifth one this season. Is it as much a

masterpiece as the last one? I don't get paid enough to do five different

things, Lou.

Five different things?

You don't even do one thing even remotely well.

All right, Ron, you're first up.

Dan, you role -play the guide.

Come on, man. Why don't you just make me the guide for good so I don't have to

go through this anymore?

That is not my call. That is Agatha's call.

I bet if you could promote anybody, you still wouldn't be here.

Shut up.

Or fuck yourself.

All right, in this scene, Bigfoot is a reluctant special buddy.

Go.

Oh, how lucky we are. A real -life Sasquatch, a fantasy.

O -M -G -S.

Did you forget about signal already?

It sometimes works.

Who is this guy?

And we'll shove it down your throat.

Hey, everybody's got to make a living, okay?

You look better, girl.

Not fair.

Pilates. Every day. And I just, I don't eat.

It works.

Johnny, I'm going to be so surprised to see you.

You're going to meet him in the car, which is parked in the employee parking

just up the hill.

I can't believe I never met him until you applied to our ad.

Thank you so much for hooking this up.

Please, don't worry about it, Carla Bear. Oh, and I have a little something

you guys.

Is your weekend.

Ah!

One key!

Does it open two rooms?

I'm sorry.

My boss will totally notice if another key went missing.

But you do have a room.

It's just in her room.

I don't want to be anywhere near her snuggapalooza.

So, why don't you take the night off, cut loose like we used to, have some

laughs, abuse some power.

I have no memory of that time.

I wish I could. I wish I could. But until 2 a .m., I...

I can't even look away, because honestly, that place will also go to

Oh, I didn't tell you, did I? I'm sober now.

Congratulations!

Speaking of hell, when did that happen?

That's a really messy, messy night. A week or so ago.

Tried to learn that substances alone will not get you through a hard time.

And Bigfoot does not look sexy in the morning, ever.

Ever. Make him take the costume off. Seriously.

I'm sorry, Marley.

Satellite TV in your room.

We just upgraded.

Movie night. Yay.

Titanic. Thank you, Ag.

Jade?

Forgetting something?

Chipotle ranchapino dip?

Outfit?

This is all I had time for.

Look, I... I am spread real thin right now.

Armando is off somewhere, and they're out of donuts at the Swoom Up Bar again.

You want to help me out here?

I am sorry. Business pitch is back on the clock, girl.

We'll see you later.

Ta -da! Ta -da!

Are you kidding me? Donuts?

You owe me so big.

I'll get your luggage.

Damn, nature.

Gross.

Turned my dumb time into fun time.

Oh, fuck!

Still swampy. Still good.

But why can't we be good pals, Man -Ape?

Fluid can't work like that.

Ron, this is where you roar.

Louder. Better.

Thanks.

Is that fucking Wes? That drama queen. He's fine.

Am I the only professional here?

That's Wes, yo.

He's not moving. Holy shit. Oh, God, he's dead.

Damn it, damn it, damn it, damn it. Call it in, Lou.

Let me call it in. I'm not taking the blame when you guys are probably all in

possession. I'm out of here. Wait a second.

Drugs or not, you're the supervisor and you lost track of them, so it's your

responsibility. It's your fault.

We're all witnesses here, Lou.

No, no.

If you would have done your job, none of this would have fucking happened.

I'm not taking the blame for a bunch of punk, whiny -ass little bitches. No

one's going to take the blame. You call me a bitch? I'll beat the fuck out of

you.

Tonight on The Blatchford.

Bitch, don't you come at me like that. You do not know me. This is your first

impression of a bitch, okay? I didn't come here to make friends.

The bitch needs to go home, and that bitch too.

Send them all home.

What else you want to know?

Does this have to be on?

You need to see if this bitch goes home.

You took a walk by the creek.

Ugh, it's probably just as tacky.

Stupid sober Agatha.

I'm going to the bar.

You don't need me, right? I don't need to worry about you? Yes, sister.

And after the wedding, you will never have to worry about me again.

I agree to that.

Have fun with your stupid -ass show.

No. Come on, Master P -Dog. She's a skank slut.

Alex! What the fuck?

Are we on break?

Johnny, I'm disappointed, frankly. You're gonna fall in with these lazy

motherfuckers? Really?

You should go hook up with West over there. The way he's going, he'll be here

the rest of his damn life.

Fucking loser.

I'm sick of this shit.

The fuck?

The fuck, you guys?

Seriously, what the fuck?

Oh. Oh, pardon me, ma 'am.

Ma 'am?

Uh, little lady.

Try again.

Hot mama.

Okay, that's good enough. Hey, bartender, get me one of the foofiest

have in the house and one for whatever the sexy beast here is having.

Ooh, look at this one.

So, uh, tell me, what's your name?

Shekinah.

Shekinah, I like this.

What's yours?

They call me Big Goona.

Big? Yeah. Oh, my, but why?

It's because I'm big.

I'm partying down, little lady.

So tell me, do you like to, uh, to party?

Oh, it depends on who I'm with.

Well, I'll tell you what I think.

I think we should party together.

I may just be a laid -back surfer dude from a tiny California town, but...

I've got the boogie inside me.

And if you want to rock and roll the good old American way, then just come on

and succumb to the kahuna.

Oh, my God, that's so dumb.

But I am so desperate, so... Yo,

Brandy.

Let's go, baby.

We've got shows at 8 and 10 .30 with complimentary non -alcoholic

But that pick is going to run you $9 .99.

Tell your friends.

And mother.

Kahuna? Not yet.

Why don't you just come back to my room and show me how big your kahuna is?

Truth be told, ma 'am, little kahuna doesn't party to that bookie. What

about big kahuna? Big kahuna's gay.

I'm gay.

Thanks, though.

Cheers.

You're welcome. 10 .30.

Did you still want your souvenir photo?

It comes with a decorative frame.

Yeah, damn it.

Thank you.

You're welcome.

Oh, my God.

I'll take that as a sign.

As fall withers that which was once beautiful, the cleansing snow renews the

earth, for the flowers to bloom and forget.

So must the artist follow destruction with inspired creation.

Leather jacket, brown eyes, poetry.

You gonna try to tell me something, too?

Like a bad fake name?

Hmm, got me there.

Marla.

Armando. Pleasure.

So, tell me, Armando, when you're not bastardizing historical and cultural

figures of national prominence, what do you do around here for fun?

We take Mexican sausage and feed it to the wild goers.

Ah, that smile.

That smile is worth 10 ,000 good flamingo fantasias.

Tell me, are you here with your boyfriend?

Sister. Uh -huh. Sad, pathetic sister.

But you know what? Not tonight, no.

Tonight, I am living my own life. Living la vida loca solo, for sure.

That's fascinating.

Tell me, just how local do you plan on getting tonight?

I like that.

Ben.

Salud.

Now, Bigfoot is a large man -ape, but he is small in the wood, like acorn.

In fact, it's very rare that anyone would... Oh!

Hello, Bigfoot!

A little early, Ron.

Oh, how lucky we are!

A live Sasquatch of fantasy!

Get it together, Ron!

What's your deal, man?

Come on, kid, let's go. We'll come back when they've actually rehearsed.

We're losing it.

Get off me, Ron!

Decky, I'm calling Agatha. All your jobs are toast!

That's for breaking character!

And that's for stepping on my shoes!

And that's for the worst tour ever!

I work for tips asshole!

Surprise Johnny!

So you never found out that Agatha and I went to college together huh?

I know you didn't want me to find out about this job, but I don't think less

you. In fact, I'm proud of you, and I want you to know how much I appreciate

what you're doing for our future.

But first, we need to take off the monkey suit.

Johnny?

Johnny? Are you okay?

Get a little rowdy there, huh, partner?

Well, if you could stretch like a Brazilian, I wouldn't have to.

I'm American.

Listen, okay?

I know the layout of this room pretty well, okay? Work with me.

Chica. Huh?

Chica? Mm -hmm. Ew.

What? Did you just play me?

Um, honestly, I just kind of waited until I could win.

Oh, oh, did you just hear that?

Somebody rang the asshole bell. You know, you think you're all rico suave,

you're not, you Lothario.

Yeah, I said it, Lothario. And you think this whole place is just your personal

hunting ground and its customers your prey?

Yeah.

Ironically, and probably a sissy pants. Okay, this immediately has become much

more hassle than what it's worth. Clearly, you can't handle your liquor.

just screaming desperate, and you're kind of a bitch.

There's a saying where I come from.

Don't stick your dick in crazy.

But let's keep this professional, okay?

Enjoy the rest of your stay here at Uncle Slavko's All -American Family

Don't forget to pay your tab.

Yeah, walk away from what you can't handle.

Macho.

Not.

No, I did not write a new scene!

You're gonna see this for the second time tonight.

Get off me, you perv!

Drink this, asshole!

Your bartender is a sissy pants.

And two, one of your monkey men just assaulted me, and I am going to sue you

unless you give Agatha the night off.

Agatha is done for the night.

Why do you say it like that?

What just happened?

The Bigfoot kids, they crashed our show.

Crystal's dead.

Who? Crystal!

And Agatha, too, probably.

Oh, my God, Carla.

Wait, where's my sister? Does anyone know my sister, Carla? She went to go

her boyfriend, Johnny. Where's Johnny?

I screwed up.

Oh, I screwed up big.

No, no, no, no, no. My sister's out there. Look, you little drunk, valued

customer, okay? It's not that your sister's out there, but if you open that

door, you destroy any safety that we've got. She needs... It's not dead.

Why don't you take a deep breath, sit down, and wait it out.

Stop. Why don't you go talk to your friend in the pantry, Ricky Rotardo?

Let me sign that release form for you.

Who's in the pantry?

Doc. What? What?

Doc.

Oh.

Hello. How are you? Do you know what's been going on?

I'm guessing not.

Oh, you're up.

Who are you?

I'm Chester.

Oh, my God.

Johnny. Ah, Chester.

My fiancé, Johnny. Jonathan?

No, thank you.

How did I even get here?

Well...

I couldn't leave you running around in the dark like that, so I shot you.

Sorry.

Thank you.

I guess.

It was the best way to keep you safe.

I saw them.

The Bigfoot kids?

Absolutely. I picked up their trail just outside Slopko's property.

I didn't see where they came from, but they're headed straight for the lodge.

You don't know what happened to them, do you? No.

But whatever it is, it's really bad.

Sorry.

Okay.

Really?

Really?

Excusez -moi, sir, kind of. What? His order.

Huh? Wait, did you... Watch it.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Do you really think that's necessary?

You know, the fact you don't worries me.

Let's go.

Damn it!

Your sister, where was she?

She was going to go find her boyfriend by his car in the employee lot.

Come on.

The window is high.

If your sister comes back, she'll pass by here.

Really?

That's crazy helpful. Thanks.

So, what's the deal with this place?

I take it your husband's not a local.

He came out here years ago from the old country.

Nobody in this town thought this place would survive.

But he really put all he had into it.

I know the employees treat it like torture, but the slob coat really is a

slice of heaven.

Sounds like the American dream in action.

Happiness, prosperity, freedom.

Dreams of freedom.

9 -1 -1, state your emergency.

What's your emergency, Rusky?

Not from Russia, Croatia.

What's your emergency, comrade?

I have employees, and they're fighting.

A public disturbance at your place again?

What is it this time? Another vodka -drenched wedding reception?

No, no, no. It is an unfortunate circumstance.

Oh, and thanks again for opening that godforsaken piece -of -shit tourist trap

in this otherwise respectable town.

Pray someone answers the line the day that place burns down, Yonko.

Justice, things are getting good. She tells me she's 17.

I said, that's okay, I know the sheriff.

Go ahead, Patty.

Slavko's got another ruckus on his hands.

Of course he does.

We'll take care of it.

See you in the morning.

Make one grunt in your jerky.

Hey, dude, sir, please, I'm sort of doing that whole got lost, taking a

home thing right now. Can I please use your phone, please?

I hear you Bigfoot boys are rambunctious tonight.

From who? The talking one, the creatures?

From me.

Oh.

Ew, gross.

It's not like that. Whatever. I'm Carla.

This is Chester.

I live here.

Hi, I'm Dan.

Can I come up now?

You know what your friends are up to?

Yeah, my friends are bigger dumbasses than usual after they all fell in the

pond. You saw them?

Yeah. Seriously, what the fuck?

Hey, oh yeah, you too, Wes? Alright, you dick.

Yeah?

Anytime you guys want to take this job seriously, you give me a call.

So I'm going home.

Get this.

Who knows that jerky?

Well, apparently they're worse than that now. Her fiancé nearly killed her.

He wasn't going to stop at scratches.

So call the cops after I call my mom.

I mean my ride.

You should definitely come with me. I have a waterbed. A very safe waterbed.

Kid.

I'm an angry old man who lives in a shack in the woods.

I do not have a phone.

What else is around?

Nothing and nobody.

And if Dan can find us here, then what would stop them from finding us here

You know more about what's going on than anybody else. Important people are

going to need to talk to you. I'm sure they'll figure it out.

No, they won't.

We're going back to the lodge.

Okay, have fun.

Oh, you're coming with us.

Paths, I don't particularly care about or love anybody there. What's in it for

me? Eternal gratitude?

You're not as pretty as you think.

Dan.

You don't really want to be here alone, do you?

No.

Guarantee my safety.

No.

Guarantee me a change of clothes.

Don't make out while I'm gone.

I know a way back. Stay quiet and close and we'll make it.

What about the Bigfoot guys?

I've taken out larger game than an angry boyfriend.

Think maybe it's rabies?

Maybe it's Satan.

Well, maybe it is. Maybe we should burn the place down in his honor. Don't you

dare! Hey, how did that girl get rid of Ron?

Uh, she got him drunk, I think.

Well, let's do that to the rest of them. Yeah, let's do that. Let's go make a

big barrel of Long Island iced teas and you can just hand them straws. You know

what?

Maybe you could bring your own ideas to the party instead of just criticizing

everybody else's.

Okay, I have an idea. It's to sit here quietly until the cops come and do their

job. You know what the best part is? It's easy. And in the meantime, you can

walk away from anything that's too difficult to deal with.

This is new.

9 -1 -1 tonight, eh, kid?

at the goddamn tweaker party.

The damn slasho!

I'm gonna die here in this crazy place with all these weird people and my only

sister lost in the... Mariana, you stupid, hot, crazy bitch.

I'm willing to bet you know her.

Marla! Do you even understand that? I'd like to think I know my sister pretty

well. What did she say?

The front door is all locked up and she wants us to go up the stairs to the side

door. The one that's all boarded up? Hey, that's a great idea!

While we're at it, why don't we check out the creepy noise in the basement?

Shh! Don't you shush me. I'm not your boyfriend.

Time to shit or get off the pot.

Guys, come on.

My mom's, like, so close.

Hey.

Hey. Hey, yourself.

What the fuck?

What are you doing? My sister's out there with some people. We need to let

in, so help me, damn it. Help you?

Get us all killed? No.

Marla, Marla, that staircase is too high profile.

Come on, we can let them in the back.

There's no time. That's not an excuse. We don't want to die because of you.

Fine, fine.

Call it.

What? Call it.

Hey. No, no, no, get up, get up, get up. Oh!

Take it easy.

How'd you get back?

This is Chester.

He saved my life.

He knew about this back trail, but how did you even know where to look for us?

This lady.

She really knows her windows.

I got more bad news.

Jim landed on the satellite. We got no phone.

What?

Everyone all right?

Well, I think we're safe for a moment.

I've got some stuff you all should hear. So, pine five?

Is he always like that?

They got ags. Ags? So that means we can't rely on anybody but each other. So

God forbid, we get separated again, I need you to fight and kick and scream

until I come and get you, okay?

Sure as.

Do you just say Shiraz?

No, Shiraz. She's on the black chiller. She keeps it one hundy and calls the

other girls out for not being in the house for Master P -Dog.

What?

She's H -B -I -C.

H. Head.

Bitch. In. Charge.

Right. That.

Okay. Yeah.

Word.

Wait, are we on the same page?

All right. Thanks for coming. How's the pie?

Let's do this.

The reason for the boys' physical and neurological mutation is a super

of hazardous waste that is altering their very DNA.

Now, I found traces of medical waste in addition to military waste,

pharmaceutical waste, heavy metals, acids, pesticides, and some sort of

that actually thrives. in pesticides it's giving them like plus 25 strength

endurance they have sensitive uh beast -like hearing and smell yet their touch

and taste has diminished visual interpretation is staggered which means

find it easier to track a moving target than a still one the jurassic park their

attention spans are low out of sight out of mind it seems also

They're now eating human flesh.

Oh.

How did this happen?

One explanation is that there's a hazardous waste dumping ground up at the

swamp.

Why, I am very upset.

Who would do such a thing?

That is my property, and I will find out who is responsible for whatever all

that happens or turns out to be.

How do we take them down?

Massive body and head trauma.

But I'd like to avoid that.

Are there any weaknesses we can exploit?

Well, kind of. The ooze is overloading their central nervous systems at an

alarming exponential pace.

Exponential?

Indeed.

Brandy.

In addition to their physical mutations, the boys are only going to get meaner

and faster quicker until, uh, yeah, their brains blow up.

Awesome. Well, that's a great weakness.

How long until that happens?

Uh, hours. Less than 12, but more than 5.

Can we help them?

Heal them?

That, I don't know yet.

Ron's blood is too saturated in alcohol to get a valid breakdown of what we've

got here. My bad.

However, if we had a pure sample of the ooze from the source, I could analyze it

and find the identity of the unknown seventh toxin.

Then I could synthesize a simple breakdown compound.

You can do that here.

Indeed.

Hi.

Let me get this straight. So our options are to either risk our lives for a

solution which may not work and includes running in the dark woods with

monsters, or we can just simply wait it out here till the threat just

disappears? We don't need any more bad press.

We already have dead police in driveway.

If they can be made to be normal, they take responsibility for tonight.

As they should. I mean, really? We're talking about monsters here. Do you want

to be the one running around with those things?

All right. Hey, time out, okay, people? At this point, these guys are monsters

who want to kill and eat us, and they can soon easily be dead.

What's the downside to this? I don't want to marry a dead monster.

I don't want a dead me. These are real people out there, and they need our

Even if they're not your family or friends, they're someone. You're going

kill more people than you're going to save. That's how these things always go.

All in for a swamp trek?

Really?

Since when is this a democracy?

Since America.

This is where Dan found the boys initially, so it must be somewhere near

source. All we have to do is take the trail northeast to get there.

But how do we get past the Bigfoot kids?

Well, that's where the distraction comes in. We need sound and movement to

occupy them while the task force completes its mission.

We got you covered.

No. I don't know if I can do this right now.

It'll be fine. Hey, I promise.

Hey, hey.

I can really use a dance partner right now.

Okay.

Dan, put the pie down.

Why does it sound like I'm involved in this? Because you're point man. You know

where we're going.

The hell I am. Shit.

Use your math, alright? How many of you passed fifth grade?

Go to the swamp. It says swamp.

Right there. Go to that. That area, more or less. It's more or less a pretty big

place.

Hey, who the hell are you?

I don't work for you, you creepy mountain man. Yeah, that's right. I said

okay? Slavko, you know I'm a team player.

But if I'm going to do this, I need a promotion next season plus company golf

cart.

Yeah, I know.

At least I got something out of tonight.

All right.

We've all got work to do. Let's do it.

You always were resourceful.

With limited means, you have to improvise.

Well, you haven't had limited means for a while now, have you?

Everyone has to survive, Chester.

Some of us aren't as good as you are alone in your shack.

So things get tough and you just leave.

Things got tough and you let me go.

You never came back for me, Chester, that's why.

I never returned.

We had love, but sometimes it's just not made it to last.

I never gave up.

And you know what? I don't think you did either.

You put that girl's sister at that window because you knew that I was

back for you.

In the night, when you're gone,

you gotta find the strength to carry on.

Come the morning, you know I'll come back for you.

It's time.

How much left do you want?

It won't happen again.

I promise.

Here.

As a last resort.

You let go just once, it could be forever.

I don't plan on it.

Oh, Madonna.

Pull

out.

Repeat, pull out.

For the record, it's fucking stupid.

Go time.

Let's go.

Can I at least get a weapon? Shut up, Dean.

You shut up.

Telling me what to do all the time. Can't believe I'm risking myself for you

people. Am I a savior?

Maybe I am.

Shut up.

This is the swamp.

It's right where it was on the map.

What?

It's my only weapon.

Shh.

Damn.

Spread out and keep watch.

I'll get right on it.

I keep it in between.

I just let love depend on it.

Jar. You almost done?

What, you in a hurry?

Yes!

Watch where you are dancing, you clumsy girl.

Can't you watch what you're doing? I was watching. You were. You never listened

to nobody.

What are you doing?

What is that?

Hold up.

Hold up. Hold up.

What is it, Chester?

Something. What's going on?

Shh. Just hold on.

Guys, let's get back to the launch. Dan, this isn't a joke.

I'm not doing something so important here. Shut up, Dan.

Don't you tell me to shut up. I'm tired of being the only one who does anything

around here. I threw Jim off the roof. What have you done? Whined a lot and

gotten some slime.

And you, Mr. Creepy Mountain Man, huh? Deliverance only has prank darts and a

gunfight? It's like you're going out of your way to suck. I'm doing this all for

a goddamn short bitch who's blonde and thinks she's all that. She's in Iowa for

a New York 2 at best.

Dan, moose.

Let's go, let's go, let's go.

What are you doing? You can't do anything right.

You weren't listening. You never listen. Keep your eyes on the goona, boys.

You all totally dig me.

Big Kahuna's the main man.

Oh, no.

Oh, no, you didn't.

Gee, he doesn't even want to work with you.

We'll leave him in the river.

They're back, but Chester's down.

Watch the door.

Now, watch the door. Carla, let me go out. You've been out there enough. No!

Get her inside!

Don't do that.

Here. Come on, let's go.

Don't close live, close American Family Live!

Come for the Buddha!

Stay for the Kahuna!

Stay with me, Chester.

The sample.

Jade went looking.

Maybe she found it.

We can't give up now. If we find her, she could have it.

I saw where she went.

Things have just gotten suddenly worse.

Marla, will you shut up, please?

I could do it without you.

If you could just dance.

One more time, and then I could go out and I could find where she went.

No.

No.

No, no, no, no, no, no.

I can still do it.

We've done all we could and look what happened.

Thank you. I'm not agreeing with you.

I'm conceding to the situation.

Tony doesn't know who you are anymore, Carly.

He could be gone and we can't change that.

No. We need to save ourselves.

Don't feed me that bullshit!

You just don't want him to steal me away from you because then you're going to

realize how much your life would suck without me. My life would suck?

Keep taking you to goddamn Reading to open up a hot rod auto body shop. You

you deserve better than that. I deserve love.

And if you ever bothered to look for it instead of fucking everything in sight,

then you'd realize that it's kind of a big deal.

Keep going, Carla.

You know what?

Fine.

I don't need you anymore.

You can't know what I'm feeling right now, so there's no point in fighting

you.

You know very damn well that I know what it's like to lose someone.

And why are you giving up?

So, we gotta cut Chester's head off.

What?

Yeah.

Calm down.

Doc, a bite means infection, right?

I don't know.

Yeah,

sure. Whatever.

Don't touch her alone. He's not a zombie.

He's something, probably.

I mean, tonight's been a fucking shit show. And now the rest of the forest is

after us. Why are you arguing with me for thinking safe?

He was a good man.

He deserves to be buried in the land that he loves.

He was a simpleton and a coward.

You've turned up for him now.

But when was he ever there for you, huh?

All those years.

And where were you then?

Where were you then?

Really?

Gonna lock him in the woodcutting room.

So everybody knows.

Jesus Christ.

Hey, Carly Bear.

I don't know why he was really here, Marla.

He already had enough money for his shop.

He took this job so that he could put down in the house in Bayview.

You mean the one next to Mom?

I wanted to tell you tomorrow.

With him.

He knew how important family was to us and how you didn't like him.

He's here trying to make a better life for us.

Now he's a monster because of it.

I never said I didn't like him. You don't need to worry about me anymore.

Carly. No.

I don't want you to talk to me. I don't want you to look at me. Just get out.

Carly. Get out!

Now!

Don't get crazy, girl.

Now is not the time to get crazy.

Sorry, Dad.

So how long until the meltdown?

I'd be surprised if they make it to brunch.

Are there any guests coming in tomorrow?

Oh, great school for deaf children.

That's going to be an interesting morning.

Men.

What? Hey.

How's your sister?

Good. She's good.

All right, good.

You know how they say there are no real problems, only opportunities and

discussions? I immediately agreed.

Okay, look, I'm only in this for Johnny, okay?

There still has to be some clever, low -risk way to keep him alive, right, Dr.

Lincoln?

You know what?

My name is Doug.

Okay, Doug.

Good night.

You know how I got that guy all drunk on tequila?

He's out.

So why don't we...

soak a bunch of steaks in 151, and then get the boys wasted, and then we can

throw them in the freezer in the kitchen, and then we'll wait for science

deal with it later.

That sounds easy.

Yeah, sounds great. You combine green alcohol and open the doors.

Sounds like a real winner.

Okay, then just Johnny.

Or just his head. I mean, science can do a lot with just a head these days,

right?

Like you know what science needs.

Wrong place, wrong time, wrong job. I hate this place.

Carla?

Your sister is saying some pretty ignorant things about...

You're kidding me. Where did you get this?

In Tester's jacket? What is it?

Oh! Oh!

Come here, come here, come here, come here.

God damn it, Marla, you were sympathizing with monsters. You

right? Sometimes bad things happen to good people.

And you can't do anything to help them, but then sometimes the universe says,

yes, you can.

Here's the opportunity.

Are you going to take it? Well, I can't not take it.

You can't just drop a state of emergency, Armando. You don't want to

anybody but yourself. There is a difference between playing it safe and

goddamn coward. Whoa. And there's a difference between living.

and dying. I will do anything that it takes to protect my family. That is my

sister. Keeping her alive would be not going out there.

You know what? You protect your family in the selfish way that you do it, and

I'm going to protect the family that I have in the way that I do it. And that

by protecting them and not being a fucking little pussy. Hey, hey, hey.

Hate to break up the love fest, but I gotta show you something.

This is the organic structure for Toxin 7.

Is that what we were... looking for in the swamp? It's more. It's better. It's

precise.

Ha! Ha -ha!

Ha! Suck it down, coward!

Good luck with that. Listen, I am kind of running on fumes right now, so I can

make the antidote, but administering it is going to be your risk alone.

No. Hmm?

No.

It's our risk together.

Oh, good, good, okay, good.

I'm sorry.

All right, that should be everything.

So smart.

Why are you working here?

Well, you know, the autonomy and... All right, clock says a couple hours.

How much do they get?

Oh, a full hundred CCs should be enough to counteract the boy's physical

toxicity.

What about should we get bit?

Same amount couldn't hurt.

Are you a hero then, huh?

We'll all go, huh?

You are so smart.

Come, slip.

Good night, Doctor.

Doug. Yeah, boss, I cannot in good faith leave this unattended. You know, the

notes alone are worth a hefty price to any number of parties, not to mention

they hold a vital incriminating clue to who's been dumping on your land.

So this is good, then, huh?

You stay.

Be alert. Do not be tired. I get coffee for you to stay awake, huh?

Coffee.

Bravo! You

can

take her from here on out.

Need anything?

No.

Bobby Volpryk.

That is the name of the bully at my school when I was growing up.

He used to get off on beating kids up, but not me.

I just wouldn't respond to anything he did, you know.

Until one day, he got so frustrated that he rushed me in gym class, and all I

did was step out of the way.

I found his face right in the bleachers.

Never mess with me again.

I solved that problem, and I didn't have to do a thing.

That is not cowardice.

That is playing to win.

I know you can't just shy away from disaster, but throwing yourself in

way makes no sense.

Sometimes what makes sense just doesn't make any sense.

That's so dumb.

Responsibility is dumb.

Can I ask you something?

And you'll be honest with me.

I think I'm getting a pimple.

What? It's going to be big. I can feel it. Oh, no. For real?

You know what I mean?

I hate when they creep up on you like that.

But, yeah, I can see it. It's going to be a monster.

Will you horse of the night ever end?

Sorry I kicked you in the balls.

But you never look at quarters the same. I never look at you the same.

You two, you two, go to sleep.

I am first watch.

Do you want any coffee?

No, no, no, no, no, thank you. I am fine.

It's all yours.

I'm fine.

Everything's fine.

You guys, rehearsal isn't until later.

Hey!

Somebody took the antidote. You need to find it, get it to the police.

We've got to get out of there.

No time.

Don't worry about me.

Come on.

I was a real mean one.

Bastard!

Bastard! Coward! You left us to die!

Mariana, there is much evidence against me. No, no, even if I did not leave like

this, I would leave soon enough for jail.

Oh, so these are your dumping grounds.

What are you charged to poison the swamp with your illegal waste?

Enough to sell out your employee and your friends and your wife? No, no, I

those monies to take. Take care of you. Sign your trophy!

I do not need to hear that from a woman who loved me out of convenience.

You took my money, ate my food, slept under my roof, and never did you love me

like him.

How can I abandon you when you never gave yourself to me?

Huh? I owe you money.

Go and join your chester.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no, darling.

Please, please, please, let us talk.

I know we got off on the wrong foot, but we can fix our love, huh?

There's room for two in the golf cart.

Everything you did yesterday was to cover your own guilt or ruin Chester's

You're a selfish, greedy man.

I am a changed man, my love.

Please put down the bomb.

They're not meant for me to see.

Hey, you two!

There is no future for us.

There is no future for us.

Howdy. You're going to want to get there.

Syringe! Antidote!

Whatever

you

do, don't not do this!

What? Don't go!

Where was he yesterday?

This is going to get gross.

Let's do this.

For family. For love.

For redemption.

Come with me, sis.

Do you mind telling me what happened here?

There's a lot more than I can ever tell you.

They're forests.

EPA's already flying in. With these notes, I think we've got a handle on the

situation.

Just don't go fishing for the rest of the season.

I thought you had more sense than to come back here.

So did I.

I think I know why you did it.

Why is that?

Because someone rang the awesome bell.

Oh, that smile is worth a thousand dead woodland creatures.

I think we deserve a real vacation.

How about Brazil?

How about Puerto Rico?

How about we talk about it later?

Ma 'am,

please stay still.

Please shut up.

What you working with? What you got for dinner tomorrow? What you working with?

I said, what you working with? What you got for dinner tomorrow? What you

working with?

WHIP 'EM NOW!

What do you want to win? What do you got for dinner? Come on, what do you want

to win?

I said, what do you want to win? What do you got for dinner? Come on, what do

you want to win?

Oh, yeah.

Oh, sit down.

Come

on,

let me see you shout.

Thunderclap! Oh yeah, girl, I'm just that far off. We just a party on.

So, uh, whip him out, let me hear you shout.

Thunderclap! Without a doubt, we just that far off. We just a party on.

So, whip him out, let me hear you shout.

Thunderclap! Without a doubt, we just that far off, girl. We just a party on.

Whip them out, let me hear you, child.

Thunderdick!