Original subtitles

Remember all, shining in the dark like a silver beacon softly calling,

eat me, eat me.

She bent to him, her crimson lip quivering, glistening in the pale

Her head bobbing helter -skelter as she sucked and drew

the sweet nectar from his ding -dong.

A silken tongue ravishing the pearly stalk that stood like a stick in the

of his throbbing, thrusting loins.

Storm, sperm, gushing, shooting, spewing forth a

torrential rain of manhood into the center of the orifice that was once her

mouth.

Ejaculate, ejaculate.

What? It's too late.

Before the moment passes, it is lost forever in the golden showers of our

youth.

Darling, there's nothing wrong with taking money for sex. I just don't take

checks.

Well, I've always loved Prince.

But this is going a bit too far.

Would you care for some coke?

Now, do you have any Pepsi?

Whose party is this?

Having this lie -less idea.

Who cares, anyway?

You know, darling, I'd really like to get into your panties.

Listen, Buster, one asshole in my panties is enough.

Howdy, ma 'am. Hi.

Nice party, huh?

Yes, it is.

Do you know whose party it is?

I don't know, but whoever it is must be one big schtick.

Schtick? No, you mean schmuck.

No, I mean schtick.

No, look.

A schmuck is what somebody is, and a schtick is what somebody does.

Oh.

Well, if it's what somebody does, honey, I'd sure like to schtick you.

No, that schtick.

Hey, hold on now. You're getting me confused.

Say, honey, did you come with anybody?

No, but I've been trying for an hour.

Huh?

Oh, hey, cute little filly.

What I mean is, are you here with anybody?

No.

Well, would you like to wander around a bit? Maybe check out the inside of the

house?

Yeah, sure.

You look like you're worth a stupor, too.

Come on. All right.

Hey, darling, where are you taking me? I don't know. Let's just explore for a

while. Yeah, well, I had some exploring in mind, but I thought maybe... Oh, come

on, Anson. You can hold it in.

I'm looking for them just for you. Oh.

This will do just fine. Oh, yeah. I just love the interior decorating.

Yeah, who cares?

I just want to decorate your interior.

What a sexy room.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Meet Tarzan, you Jane.

Oh, okay, Jungle Boy. You just close those big green eyes and don't move.

All right.

Okay, Cowboy. Now you just keep those big green eyes closed.

I'm going to give you a treat.

Not yet.

Coming up.

Very close.

Okay, lover.

Now, how do you like my new skin?

Yeah, kind of like the real one better.

Come here, you little tiger.

It's the leopard, Tarzan.

Well, don't matter to me none, pussycat. I just want to grab your tail.

Yeah? Well, I want to grab your stick.

The world's a funny place, a very strange place.

Many, many mirrors make you lose.

But it could be better, just like it should.

This is the start of something good.

are we, Disneyland?

Hey, we're going to the movies, honey.

Well, I'll be damned.

This house has just about everything.

Wow, there must be collector's items. Let's have a look down there.

Yeah.

I didn't know they made stag films in them days.

Yeah, that's practically an instant replay.

What's she doing with an old budget like that?

The same thing you was doing with me, sugar pie.

Oh, now, but he's such a dirty old man.

Well, I reckon I will be, too, someday.

Shit, my grandpappy's 89.

He's still chasing after 12 -year -olds.

Why is Doug good?

Well, it don't matter to him none.

He's half blind anyway.

He says that finding the right hole is like staking for all.

If you drill long enough, you're bound to find it.

Hey, let's get out of here.

Hey, yeah, you got a point.

Yeah, this might be trespassing or invasion of privacy.

Good.

Absolutely deep.

Good. What is?

That there one -lady jug band.

I think that's a two -jug lady band. Anyway, if that there is music, I better

pack my bags, go home, and get married.

Oh, do you play an instrument?

Lord, no.

Only thing I play is a theme.

Yeah, I bet that's not all you do, honey.

Oh, well.

That and my art.

Your art?

Yes, I sing country western music.

Hey, now you're talking my language, honey. I'm from Texas.

Already knew that. Good looking.

Pleased to meet you. I'm Dolly Martin.

Dolly Martin. Well, this is a pleasure.

Hey, how are you?

Well, awfully dry.

Just polished.

I sure could use something wet.

Well, listen, just try the pool.

I forgot my suit, and it's not my birthday.

Uh, well, you ladies just wait right here, and I'll get us some refreshments.

Y 'all hurry on back now.

You look bored.

Aren't you having a good time?

Yeah, it's been for a while.

Excuse me. My name is Darren Blue.

This is my place.

Oh, so it's your party.

Everybody's been wondering about you, mysterious host.

Where have you been hiding?

I haven't.

I've been watching.

Watching? You and your friend.

Oh, you mean Roy.

Oh, listen, he's just a schmuck.

He's dead.

Excuse me?

Oh, it doesn't matter.

Well, then you won't mind coming with me.

Where to?

Just... Come with me.

It's your party. I mean, you just can't leave your party.

I have had enough parties to fill a life.

Yeah?

Let me get my...

mind, honey.

Why don't you just sing one of them tender melodies, huh?

You really want me to? Oh, yeah.

No place in particular. I just wanted a change of mood.

Are you a moody person?

No. I used to be.

When I was younger, I guess I mellowed out.

Oh.

How old are you?

Guess.

22.

Nope, 24.

24. You know, that's a marvelous age.

When I was your age, I never went to any parties like that one.

No, sir, I was much more innocent than that.

You were more innocent at my age?

When was that, Grandpa?

1915?

No, 1925.

Oh, my.

You really are old enough to be my grandpa.

No. You're still so innocent.

You know, the 20s, the early 1920s, was a time of innocence.

People still believed in virtue, romance, love and marriage.

Marriage? Oh, my God, man. I mean, marriage is an obsolete, archaic, sexist

convention arising from a hypocritical extension of the middle class

Oh, you laugh.

Well, it may surprise you, but even in the 20s, there were people that sounded

lot like you do.

And a lot of them were women.

Yes.

But there was one woman I'll bet you never heard of because she never made

headlines, but she was so far ahead of her time.

Who?

She was a very wealthy, sophisticated...

Older woman.

And she had a particular weakness.

Younger man.

Hey, Max, is it much further?

No, madame.

We will be there shortly.

Oh, good.

It's getting terribly warm.

My underarms are simply sopping. As a matter of fact, I'm wet all over.

Maybe someday someone will invent some way to blow the cool air in and keep the

hot air out.

They might call it air adjustment or air control, something like that.

Would you be a darling to light my cigarette for me?

I really don't think you ought to smoke, Henrietta.

It's just not ladylike.

Thank you, Mark.

You sound positively Victorian.

Besides, whoever said I was a lady? And you know my addiction to pleasure.

And a cigarette is the perfect type of perfect pleasure.

It's exquisite, yet it leaves you unsatisfied.

Darling, don't frown like that.

You must be thinking.

Please try not to do it. It makes terrible lines on your forehead.

I don't care. I'll think if I want to.

Oh, don't be cross, darling.

Billy, look at the expressions on the faces of studious men, successful men.

Simply awful.

But in the church, where a clergyman has only to say at age 80 what he's been

taught to say at age 80, well, they all look simply divine.

Billy, darling, the most beautiful creatures in the world are the brainless

ones.

Over there, Max.

Yes, Madame.

Why, Henrietta, what a wonderful spot.

Yes, isn't it just perfect?

It's one of my secret hideaways.

You've been here before.

Oh, yes, many times.

Is there anything else, madame?

Oh, no, Max. That'll be all. Thank you.

Just wait in the car and pick us up about five.

Very good, madame.

Now, I have a little surprise.

Ta -da!

A Henrietta. That's illegal.

Oh, posh illegal.

What a silly word.

Are the trees legal? Is the sun and moon illegal?

But you could go to jail for that.

Oh, hush. Don't be tiresome. Be a darling and open it.

Where did you get it? Oh, from a dear old friend of mine. He used to use his

boat for fishing, but he found out that liquor is far more profitable than fish.

Smuggler. Yes, that's what it's called.

Henrietta, you have the most amazing range of friends.

You're not very selective.

Oh, but I am, darling.

I select my friends for their good looks, my acquaintances for their good

character. And my enemies for their good intellect.

Do you prefer a leg or breast?

Oh, a leg.

Come sit next to me in the shade.

You're going to get sunburned, and you shouldn't. Why not? I'd like a bit of a

tan.

The sun causes wrinkles.

So what? That doesn't bother me.

Well, it should.

Why?

Because right now you have the one thing worth having.

What's that, Henrietta?

Youth.

And beauty.

The most marvelous thing there is in the world.

But...

I don't believe in that, Henrietta.

Well, of course you don't now, because you have it.

You are young and beautiful, and you charm people wherever you go. But

when you're old and wrinkled and ugly, then you'll

miss it.

Then you will yearn for it terribly.

But beauty is so superficial.

Is that all you see in me?

Superficial? Oh, my dear, only shallow people never judge by appearances.

Really, the true mystery of the world is in the visible, not the invisible.

It's the things you can see and touch.

To me, beauty is a form of genius.

Oh, higher than genius because it needs no explanation.

It simply exists.

A fact.

Perfect. Like sunlight.

For springtime.

For the delicate raindrops on a rosebud.

Was that Max's wife getting this kiss?

I mean, didn't Henry and the other young men know they were being filmed?

Well, the young man sure as hell didn't, but she did.

Henry had to plan the entire thing.

But why?

Oh, who knows? I suppose it was her way of getting off.

I told you she was pretty outrageous.

Did the young boy ever find out?

Oh, yes.

Well, I suppose that was the whole point of it. You see, she loves bringing

surprises like that.

I have a marvelous surprise for you, darling. Now, I want you to sit back,

relax, and enjoy it.

Well, as they say in Hollywood... What is it they say in Hollywood?

Roll it, madame.

Oh, yes.

Roll it, madame.

What do you think?

I... I... I can't believe it. Well, how did... Well, when did... Look at

yourself. I wanted you to see for yourself how truly fantastic you are.

Isn't he fantastic, Max?

Fantastic, madame.

Surely now you can see your own beauty.

I don't know what to say. I've never seen myself like that before.

Oh, of course you haven't.

You had to know what a gorgeous creature you are.

You know, you were right, Hermione.

Absolutely right. And I'm beginning to see that clearly now.

Up there on that stream.

Beauty.

And beauty.

They are the only things worth having.

You do have miraculous staying power.

Really am good, aren't I?

Yes, my darling.

And the gods have been good for you.

But unfortunately, what the gods give, they all too quickly take away.

And when you grow old, you're left with nothing but memories.

I see.

Well, that's the way it is.

Thank you, Max. That'll be all.

I don't want to grow old.

When I find that I am, I shall kill myself.

Don't talk that way, my silly darling.

How long will you continue to love me once I've gotten my first wrinkles?

You will stop loving me, won't you?

My dearest baby.

It's true.

Say it.

Will you love me always?

Always. Always. What a dreadful word. Why are young people so fond of using

They spoil every romance by trying to make it last forever.

How sad it is that someday I shall grow old and horrible and even impotent.

But up there on that screen, that fleeting image of me captured on that

film, I'll never be any older than that particular day in June.

But what if it were the other way around?

Other way around?

What if it were the film that would grow old instead of me?

And I would remain as young as the day it were taken.

What an utterly enchanting, fantastic idea, darling.

God, I would give anything for that.

Well, I'm afraid there's really nothing you can give.

Perhaps I have taught you too well of youth and beauty and not enough of

anything else.

Oh, dear, I've upset you. Come, sit down.

Don't humor me, Henrietta.

I'm not a child.

But if you had your way, that's exactly what you would be and remain forever.

A silly, boring child.

Well, you can say what you like, but I know I shan't be able to bear growing

old.

Like... Like me?

No, I didn't mean that.

Oh, I'm sorry I ever even made that silly motion picture.

I think the best thing would be just to destroy it now. No! But, darling, as you

grow older, it'll only torture you to look at it. No, you can't, and I won't

you.

What a strange couple.

What happened to them? Did they continue as lovers?

Yes, for a while. A few years passed, but then one day Henrietta just up and

disappeared.

She left that young man with a broken heart.

And a very generous back roll.

And he never saw her again?

No.

Well, at least he came out of something.

I mean, that's not such a sad ending.

You're right.

But money wasn't the only thing she left him.

What do you mean?

One day, shortly after Henrietta left, he decided to watch the film that she

given him. He was feeling a bit down, and he wanted to see his love once more.

As he watched, he thought he noticed something peculiar.

He was distracted away from Henrietta and thought he detected small changes in

his own image.

At first he thought it was simply that the film had begun to show the normal

signs of wear and tear.

But suddenly he realized that something very strange indeed had happened.

Something so amazing he could hardly believe his eyes.

That it was only his likeness that had begun to age.

Oh, nothing all that noticeable, but to this narcissistic young man, a wrinkle,

a gray hair did not go undetected.

And there was no corresponding change in Henrietta's appearance.

There was no doubt about what had happened.

He had simply stopped aging. He was exactly as he'd been at 25.

Are you telling me that his wishes come true? I mean that the film got old while

he stayed young?

Exactly, but although his film image deteriorated.

He remained as young as the day of his death.

Wow, that's the wildest story I've ever heard.

Do you know what happened to him after that?

Well, in the years that followed, he adopted the lifestyle that Henrietta had

introduced him to. A life of comfort, beauty, total devotion to pleasure.

By the 1930s, he was living in grand style.

Scram!

You too!

He's almost ready.

He put his money to use during Prohibition and made a fortune in

enterprises. His life became a constant whirl of wine, women, wild parties, and

the morning after consequences.

See, dearie? I made your favorite breakfast.

Come on, cupcake. Sit down.

Oh, cut that cupcake crap.

Oh, you're in a bad mood.

Sure I'm in a bad mood.

My head feels like King Kong sat on it.

And your face!

It looks like he shit on it. What is that crap?

It's a facial.

It's good for my complexion.

Vogue magazine says that at least once a week, all beautiful women use masks.

You could use a permanent one.

Oh, do you think I need a new permanent?

Not a permanent bimbo. A mask.

Where's the locks?

Locks? The locks.

What good are bagels without locks?

I bought cream cheese.

Well, you try this on your complexion.

Oh, now see what you've done.

I knew it's an improvement.

Answer that.

Like this?

Answer that.

Who is it, Faye?

I think they must have the wrong apartment.

Do you know a John Dillinger?

John Dillinger?

Open the door.

We went to high school together.

It's okay, John. Come on in.

Why, John, you old hooky player, you. How are you? Hey, Dan.

How's the world treating you? You don't look a day over 25.

Hey, gang!

I want you to meet my old classmate, Darren Blue.

This is my girl, Jean Harland.

And my partner, Whitey.

Whitey, aren't you wearing the wrong color?

I like black.

Hello?

Jean, honey, I ain't seen this mug since we was in high school.

We broke into the teacher's desk, told the final exam.

Last time I saw you, John, you were in the principal's office.

That's right.

Only I took the rap and got expelled.

You got off scot -free, went to college.

Well, I've come back for my share.

Haven't I seen you with moving pictures this morning?

No, I don't believe so. John doesn't let me go to the movies.

You want to see a moving picture?

I'm wanted in 13 states.

For robbing banks?

Nah, for stealing Roosevelt buttons.

Listen, Darren, I'm on the lam.

The law is on my tail, and I'm in a jail.

Gee, that's got a nice ring to it, boss.

He's really a romantic poet.

Yeah, it wouldn't be all that serious, except they started up this new federal

bureau in Washington.

is headed up by this queer who's got hot nuts for my ass.

He'd like to fry it and eat it. No shit.

My shit, too. Yeah, this J. Edgar somebody.

He took babyface Nelson into custody.

Asked him to hand over his piece. When Nelson didn't move quick enough, this

fairy grabbed it with both hands and sucked out all of his bullets.

I don't know what this country's coming to. Put a man like that into orifice.

Pretty soon, they'll be teaching in schools.

John, how can I help you? Well, my problem is, the last bank I hit asked me

for a loan.

I'm down and I'm low, and I could sure use some dough.

That's very musical, Bosh.

He is a romantic poet.

John, I'd like to help you, but I just invested my last dime in a pay -toilet

franchise.

I'm flushed.

Tell you what, I could leave Jean Harlett here as collateral.

That's some hot tomato. Where'd you pick her?

She was marathon dancing in a small town near St. Lou.

I told her I would take her to Hollywood with me. She fell for it. All the way

to Chicago, she thought we were heading west.

Every time I saw a road sign, I'd zip my fly, shoved her head down. She got to

liking it down there so much, I didn't see her face again.

Do we hit Chicago?

Hey, Jean, honey, come over here.

I want you to stay here and keep Mr. Company blue.

I mean, Mr. Blue, company, while I'm gone.

Maybe you can make yourself useful.

But, John, where are you going? Sorry, honey, I'm leaving tonight, and I've got

to travel light. I might hop a freight.

Can't take no extra weight.

He's a folk hero.

Say, John, I hear there's a rumor going around that the Smithsonian Institute is

interested in buying a part of your body. That is, after you're through with

Which part, John?

Your favorite part, honey.

But I see to it that all the money goes to you.

your guns.

Come out now and we'll hold fire.

All right.

They can't kill me. I'm a folk hero.

Up yours, J. Edgar.

Adios, guy.

See you in the movies.

Take me with you, John, please. What will happen to me? What will I do?

Frankly, Harley, I don't give a fuck.

Now he is a folk hero.

He never even got a chance to sell his part.

Don't feel bad, honey. You don't get much these days for used parts.

But what will I do now?

You could try the dishes.

You cocky cunt. You get in that kitchen.

I got to take care of this lady in distress.

You don't like my dress?

Sure I do, sweetheart.

And I'm going to see to it that you get a lot more pretty things to wear.

Because you and I are going to get along just fine.

Now dry those tears.

I'm going to take real good care of you.

I washed all the dishes, honey.

Well, here's one dish you can watch.

Maybe you can learn something.

Didn't his friends begin to wonder about his looks?

I suppose so.

When World War II broke out and he tried to enlist, he only looked 25, but they

turned him down for being overage. He was past 40.

What did he do?

Well, he left the country. He bounced around the world.

He spent the war years as an expatriate. It was as if his eternal youth had

placed him in a vacuum, uncommitted, untouched by world events.

Until 1943.

When destiny caught up with this cynical man.

What do you mean?

Well, he had quite a scam going for himself.

He was making a lot of money selling fake passports and letters of transit to

desperate refugees.

How are you, Louie?

Have you seen my bird around?

No, Mr. Blue.

But there's been a dame looking for you.

Ah, it's still the same old story.

Damn it, Louie, how many times have I told you? You want a whistle, all you

to do is put your lips together and blow.

Forget it.

Now, what about that dame?

Well, she came in last night with a husband and a teenage girl.

They look desperate.

They're staying upstairs.

All in the same room?

Did they bring any luggage?

Yeah, it's the guy's daughter.

Anyway, the dame was down here later asking a load of questions.

My kind of loaded questions?

Yeah, your kind.

Thanks for the tip, Louie.

This could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship.

Hey.

You got a match?

I'm sorry I don't smoke.

Shit. I was sure you did.

I take it you've got a name.

Slims. Virginia Slims. But don't take it too far.

Just how far are you going?

That depends.

What's the speed limit in Morocco?

Well, if you're not going by camel, it gets pretty fast.

You must be Mr. Blue.

True.

I've been waiting for you.

You're much younger than I had expected.

The pizza here agrees with me.

But there is no pizza in Morocco.

I guess I've been misinformed.

No. There is pizza here, and it's leaning.

Now, what did you want to see me about?

I need your help.

We have to get out of the country.

My husband's life is in grave danger.

Is that so?

How many packs a day is he on?

You don't understand, Mr. Blue.

I love my husband dearly.

He's given me everything I've ever wanted.

And more. More?

I understand you have letters of transit.

It'll cost you.

I've got 2 ,000 francs. You can have it all.

They're a grand apiece, and I've only got two.

But I need three.

He has a daughter.

I'd leave the little brat behind, but he'll never go without her.

Well, that's tough, sweetheart.

You get what you pay for. Now, I can get you the two, all right.

You can get him out of the country and flip with the daughter for the other

Mr. Blue?

You're a schmuck.

No.

He just don't like my stick. But if you change your mind, just whistle.

A strange soft moan seemed to be coming from down the hall.

It had a familiar sound to it.

It was that teenage brat that Slim had mentioned.

And she was having a swell time.

Frankie Here's looking at you kid

Just a minute, sweetheart.

Did you get them? I got them. Relax.

Three? Two.

But Paul won't leave without the both of us.

That's fine. That solves your problem.

The two of you can go and he can stay and wash dishes till the war's over.

You don't understand.

My husband is a big wheel in the resistance.

All right.

I'll buy him a dishwasher.

How can you joke at a time like this?

The fate of France.

The future of all foreign peoples who love freedom.

French bread.

Franklin D. Roosevelt.

Depends on him.

What the fuck are you talking about?

Please. I beg of you.

You can't be that unsentimental.

I can see that you're not that cruel and hard.

Well, then you need glasses.

Ah, she brought them.

Not exactly.

Perhaps this will be more convincing.

Now give me those papers.

Go ahead and shoot.

You'll be doing me a favor.

Put that toy down, Slims, before you hurt yourself.

You haven't got the nerve to use that.

Oh, no?

Watch me.

Oh, it's hopeless.

I was wrong about you.

You couldn't care about anyone or anything.

Even without my glasses on, I can see that your face lacks the little lines of

love that life leaves.

Oh, hello, Bellevue. Give me Dr.

Jazz.

He's got just what I need. Oh, I'll say he has.

When the world goes wrong and I get the blues.

Oh, he's the man who makes me get out.

Both my dance and chill.

The more I get, the more I want, it seems.

I'll page old Dr.

Jazz in all my dreams.

When I'm troubled, bound and mixed.

Oh, he's the guy that gets me fixed.

Oh, hell above you.

Hello? Hello?

Hello?

Thank you.

um

Ah, that's the stuff the dreams are made of.

Ah, Herr Bluth.

Have you seen this man?

We suspect that he is in the area.

Ah, a flasher, eh?

This is a serious matter.

Yeah, I'd like to help you boys, but this picture is awfully blurred.

Maybe the Fuhrer ought to invest in a brownie.

Herr Bluth.

The German people are perfectly capable and efficient at making their own

camera. Ah?

Hey, Louie.

You like a Leica?

No. I make an Acorn.

What the fuck are they talking about?

I would not fool around if I were you.

If you see this man, his wife, and their daughter, you will contact us

immediately. Ja?

There will be a car waiting outside.

Well, darling, have you found the flasher? Nein, Major.

I haven't got all night.

Good day, Herr Bluth.

And you, too.

Heil Hitler. Heil Hitler.

had a visit from the SS.

Social Security?

No, but you're stopping.

Ah, they're downstairs in the car.

I'll keep them busy.

Anyway, my Falcon needs a walk.

Here, take these. Get your family and run.

Three. Two.

Oh, well, I never learned to count.

Oh, Mr. Blue, why have you done this?

Never mind why and skip the money before I decide to regret it. Oh, you'll never

regret it.

It's even better when you help.

Two minutes, Dan.

What's eating you, boss?

Oh, that Slims dame. She really got under my skin.

I was dead wrong about her. She's stuck by a man.

I guess she gave her everything she ever wanted.

And a lot more.

You're a young man, boss.

Got a long life ahead of you.

There's going to be a lot more dames before this picture's over.

I'm going to get some shirai, Louie.

Good night.

Don't let him out of your sight.

I tried to leave, and I couldn't.

I had to see you again.

Olive.

There's just one thing I'd like to know.

Do you smoke after you fuck?

Well, I don't know.

I never look.

We'll be right back.

I mean, that's the most romantic story I've ever heard.

What happened after that?

Well, he returned to America during the 50s.

30 years had passed since that film was taken.

And he kept it with him all that time?

Only now, when he looked at it, he saw a graying, paunchy, middle -aged man.

But he hadn't aged a day.

Wow.

It must be freaky to be past 50 and still at 20.

It was. He felt like a freak. He avoided all contact with his old friends. He

felt alienated, cut off.

So during the 50s, he took to the open road. He was a man without a country and

a rebel without a cause.

Hey, baby, this is Rubber Ass Dick, your rockin' sockin' DJ comin' your way with

the most insane playin' every way. Let me see that again. I've seen it five

times already.

Look, I'm tellin' you, it's not her nipple.

It's a staple.

I guess you're right.

Yeah, all right. Well, look here. I want you to see this.

Read this here.

Bottom of the page. Last paragraph.

His mind drifted back to warm memories of their first meeting.

They had returned to her apartment and fucked until the sun rose. See, I'm

telling you. You're starting to print it right out.

Now, look there.

Read that. No asterisk.

C -U -N -T.

This is just the beginning. If they can get away with this.

They can get away with a lot more.

Did you at least feel her tit? Of course. What do you think?

On top or underneath?

Underneath. It don't count on top.

Was she patted?

Well, it didn't exactly get inside of the ear.

Then it don't count.

Bullshit. You're still jerking off in your sister's pants.

And your mother's got a little asshole.

You. I... Hey, hey, hey, hey. Check out the bumpers on that one.

That's very nice.

Hey, baby,

you sure wearing that itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow polka dot bikini?

That I had to wear for the first time today.

Hey, I bet that would make a hit record.

Hey, where are you going, hot spots?

Why are you being so unfriendly? Let me introduce my boys here. This is Frankie,

and Cookie, and Mickey, and Chelsea.

And I'm Ringo, and I want to hold your hand.

You don't expect me to pull for that, old line.

Old line? I ain't written it yet.

Hey, we ain't in a hurry.

Hey, you stuck up or something?

Hey, you definitely talk to you. What's the matter? You got the rag on?

Hey, you're in a rush or something? You got a date with the milkman? Take your

hands off!

Hey, is that your bike? Yeah, what's my hula hoop?

You like to hump your hula hoop?

Hey! You can't get it! Hey, take your mitts off my handle!

You got such a cute pair of handles, baby.

Hey, I got it!

Hey, come and get it!

How many she got? One or two?

Man, do it.

Hey.

Looks like I got here in the dick of time.

Now, you boys stay cool.

This might grow up to be hippie.

You better come with me.

Oh, you better believe it, huh?

What the fuck was that guy? The low ranger.

What

do

you do?

I go.

I just go, go, go.

You know what I mean?

Aren't you going very slow?

I like to take my time.

Nice and easy.

Gee,

you're not like any of the other boys I know.

Girl, don't call me boy.

I ain't gonna stop working on that silly bike.

I told you, I like to take my time.

Nice and easy.

What are you doing?

Fixing my stick shift.

It's been a long time since you've had your pipes clean.

So, what do you do?

Nothing.

Nothing? That's all you do?

That's right.

Don't you get bored just playing with your bike?

No.

But you look like such a strong, sensitive, alienated, shy,

sullen, inarticulate, gentle, self -destructive, confused,

disoriented.

uprooted, angry, scared, autistic symbol of our times.

You might be right.

Why are you throwing your life away?

Don't you see? You could have been somebody.

I was.

I was a contender.

It sucked.

Sunstead, you're a bum.

That's right.

That's why I came here.

To Palookaville?

Hand me that, will you?

Come get it!

Come on, come in and get it!

Come get it!

Oh, come on, I need that.

Hey, you.

I'll stick your ass.

Hey, baby.

You're looking good, mama.

Yeah, I know.

Where you been all this time, mama?

I don't know.

What do you think me and you were pulling out a little bit now?

I don't know about that. You know what I mean? Rocking a little bit now.

Rock it.

We're going rocking.

Oh, come on, babe.

Take it all.

Come on, swallow.

Nice girls don't do that.

Oh, Natalie would.

Thank you.

Somehow I can't imagine him living that way for too long.

Wasn't he too used to money and comfort?

You're right, he was, and he quickly tired of being broke, too.

So he found another way of making money.

And it suited him perfectly.

And what was that?

You remember in the 30s he was dealing in booze?

Well, in the 60s he just naturally turned back towards stealing.

Drugs.

The hard stuff?

No,

that wasn't his style.

But there were thousands of young people trying grass and psychedelics.

There was enough of a market out there already just waiting to be exploited.

And so he made a lot of money.

Yes, he did. It was easy. He still looked young. He hung around with young

people.

Peace marches, BNs, anti -war rallies, all the way from Haight -Ashbury to the

East Village.

It was easy to find young flower children with enough of daddy's money

their pockets, eager to try the latest hallucinogen.

Angelina, three, and sunshine.

Which one's which?

Are we interrupting something?

No, they're just doing their thing.

Thought I had a pipe around here somewhere.

Oh, shit. The vandal broke the handle.

I'll just roll a couple of chairs.

I hear bells ringing.

It's the door. I'll get it.

I wonder who this could be.

Oh, no. Not Mom. Dad.

Well, Jane, dear, this is quite a cozy place you have here.

Actually, it's quite nice.

How can she live in this shit?

Thanks, Dad. I'm glad you like it. I'm really happy you both decided to visit.

When the fuck are they going to stop bugging me?

You look marvelous, dear. I just love your outfit.

Where in the world did she find this shit?

How's that for communication?

Mom, I'm learning about life by living it. All you do is read books about sex.

Jane, darling, when I was your age, sex was so taboo, I didn't even know I was

supposed to enjoy it. We knew nothing about the female orgasm. I couldn't even

find my clitoris. That's because you look between the pages instead of

your legs.

It's right above this area here.

Jane. And a good shtick.

Don't hurt either.

I knew it. You are on drugs.

So what? It takes five martinis to get you and Daddy in the sack.

And that's only once a month.

Not even that anymore.

Your father has a problem.

You mean... Dad's got a fickle pickle?

Shh. Jane, don't be vulgar.

Bullshit. All he needs is a little stimulation.

You don't think I'd provide it?

I'm attentive, loving, supportive.

Well, if you're such an expert, what do you suggest?

Well, for one thing, do you blow him?

Blow him?

Yeah, you know, give him head.

Give him head?

Come on, Mom. You know what I mean. Suck him off.

Suck him off?

Keep your teeth out of the way.

Dear, it's getting late. We really should be going.

It's our bridge night, remember?

Oh, yes, of course.

Well, it certainly has been interesting talking to you. We've been discussing

the generation gap. You know, this young man has a remarkable, rare

understanding of the problems of middle age.

Well, I'm not as young as I look.

Isn't he groovy?

Tell me, young man.

How do you stay young?

Yes, do tell us. Well, do you remember those mistakes you made when you were

young? Yes, I made quite a few.

Just repeat them. Hey, man.

Far fucking out.

I am repeating.

Must have been that beer.

Man, I thought you... Paris would never leave.

All that crap about what a cozy place this is.

They'll never change.

They've always lied to me.

Yeah, can't trust anyone on the third.

Would you believe 60?

Anyway, I slipped some acid in this beer.

Oh, wow.

Thank you.

My God, what a full life he led.

You could call it that, I suppose.

And yet there was always something missing.

A void that grew larger with each passing decade.

What do you think it was?

I know what it was.

It was during the 60s on an acid trip that the revelation came.

Revelation?

That nothing can remain the same.

That change is the essence of life.

And that aging is the proof.

And that the lack of change is the real death.

I never thought of it like that.

Of course not. You're young.

Neither had I.

But for all those years of youth and beauty, the payment was...

Alienation.

I was the loneliest man on earth.

But Darren, if you had to choose over again, wouldn't you still choose you?

No, I don't think I would. You see, I miss the most important things in life.

Growth, love, a connection to humanity.

Oh, yeah, you can say that now, but I'd still choose eternal you.

Are you sure about that?

Yes, I am.

I guess your party's over.

Remember I told you I had enough parties to fill a lifetime.

Hard to believe you said it this afternoon.

I feel like I've lived a lifetime.

I've had a wonderful time today.

You don't mind kissing an old buzzard?

What?

That's what you called me when you watched me on a film this afternoon.

Oh, yeah.

Well, come here, you dirty old man.

Darren? Darren?

Darren?

Darren?

Goodbye, Linda.

Bye.

Henrietta?

Wait,

is that you?

Oh, yeah, Henrietta.

Henrietta.

And now it's real.

You made that deal.

The love we have is something that I feel.