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These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:31,666 --> 00:00:34,601 Mr. Mackey: ♪ It's the holiday season 2 00:00:34,602 --> 00:00:37,337 ♪ With the whoop-de-do and hickory dock ♪ 3 00:00:37,338 --> 00:00:40,473 ♪ And don't forget to hang up your sock ♪ 4 00:00:40,474 --> 00:00:43,109 ♪ 'Cause just exactly at 12:00 ♪ 5 00:00:43,110 --> 00:00:46,080 ♪ He'll be coming down the chimney, down ♪ 6 00:00:48,616 --> 00:00:51,117 ♪ Mkaaay 7 00:00:51,118 --> 00:00:53,987 Alright, everyone, are we enjoying the festivities?! 8 00:00:53,988 --> 00:00:56,289 [ Cheers and applause ] 9 00:00:56,290 --> 00:00:59,031 Well, it's time for a very special guest now. 10 00:00:59,032 --> 00:01:01,528 Here he is -- Santa! 11 00:01:01,529 --> 00:01:03,530 [ Cheers and applause ] 12 00:01:03,531 --> 00:01:05,169 Together: Santa! 13 00:01:05,170 --> 00:01:07,658 Merry Christmas, everyone. 14 00:01:07,659 --> 00:01:11,095 This is the season for joy and giving. 15 00:01:11,096 --> 00:01:14,765 But let's also not forget that, unfortunately, 16 00:01:14,766 --> 00:01:18,535 it's the season for accidents caused by drunk driving. 17 00:01:18,536 --> 00:01:20,204 [ Cheering stops ] 18 00:01:20,205 --> 00:01:24,241 Did you know that the holidays are when the most DUIs 19 00:01:24,242 --> 00:01:27,177 and drinking-related accidents occur? 20 00:01:27,178 --> 00:01:28,946 This is like that little Greta girl 21 00:01:28,947 --> 00:01:30,180 with the global warning. 22 00:01:30,181 --> 00:01:31,582 Buzz-kill! 23 00:01:31,583 --> 00:01:34,285 [ Crowd booing ] Please, be sure to celebrate 24 00:01:34,286 --> 00:01:36,120 the season responsibly. 25 00:01:36,121 --> 00:01:38,689 Because last holiday sea-- [ Booing grows louder ] 26 00:01:38,690 --> 00:01:42,459 The -- The most drunk-driving accidents than ever be-- 27 00:01:42,460 --> 00:01:45,129 We're trying to have fun here, Santa! 28 00:01:45,130 --> 00:01:47,765 Okay, okay. Come on. [ Booing continues ] 29 00:01:47,766 --> 00:01:49,400 All Santa is saying 30 00:01:49,401 --> 00:01:52,036 is that drinking and driving during the holidays -- 31 00:01:52,037 --> 00:01:53,704 Okay, thank you, Santa. 32 00:01:53,705 --> 00:01:56,273 That was wonderful and informative. 33 00:01:56,274 --> 00:01:57,875 Thank you for coming, everyone. 34 00:01:57,876 --> 00:01:59,410 We hope you and your loved ones 35 00:01:59,411 --> 00:02:02,813 enjoy all your favorite holiday traditions! 36 00:02:02,814 --> 00:02:05,249 Yeah! Let's drive! 37 00:02:05,250 --> 00:02:07,318 [ Crowd cheering ] 38 00:02:07,319 --> 00:02:10,254 [ "Kay Thompson's Jingle Bells" by Andy Williams playing ] 39 00:02:10,255 --> 00:02:12,923 ♪ Bring out your bells, your Christmas bells ♪ 40 00:02:12,924 --> 00:02:16,393 ♪ Come on, we're going for a sleigh ride ♪ 41 00:02:16,394 --> 00:02:19,296 {\an1}♪ Christmas time is here again 42 00:02:19,297 --> 00:02:21,899 ♪ Come on, we're going for a sleigh ride ♪ [ Tires screech ] 43 00:02:21,900 --> 00:02:23,067 Man: I know, Ned! 44 00:02:23,068 --> 00:02:25,336 {\an1}♪ To spread the cheer again 45 00:02:25,337 --> 00:02:28,606 ♪ From the top of the chimney to the top of the wall ♪ 46 00:02:28,607 --> 00:02:31,909 ♪ Dash away, dash away, dash away, all ♪ 47 00:02:31,910 --> 00:02:38,816 For subtitling services, contact: waqas.zahoor89@gmail.com 48 00:02:38,817 --> 00:02:41,952 ♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way ♪ 49 00:02:41,953 --> 00:02:44,989 {\an1}♪ Oh, what fun it is to ride in a one-horse open sleigh ♪ 50 00:02:44,990 --> 00:02:47,458 ♪ Jingle bells, jingle bells, jingle all the way ♪ 51 00:02:47,459 --> 00:02:49,394 [ Tires screech, bang ] 52 00:02:53,265 --> 00:02:55,032 Mornin', Jim. Mornin', Kate. 53 00:02:55,033 --> 00:02:56,433 Mornin', Stotch. 54 00:02:56,434 --> 00:02:58,168 We really tied one on last night, huh? 55 00:02:58,169 --> 00:02:59,536 Happy Holidays. 56 00:02:59,537 --> 00:03:01,705 What the hell's going on? 57 00:03:01,706 --> 00:03:03,674 We -- We don't know! 58 00:03:03,675 --> 00:03:04,875 Hey, guys. 59 00:03:04,876 --> 00:03:06,644 The [bleep] is this? 60 00:03:06,645 --> 00:03:10,114 {\an8}Jimbo: There's like a... chain blocking the liquor aisle. 61 00:03:10,115 --> 00:03:12,216 Uh, maybe we can just go around to the other side. 62 00:03:12,217 --> 00:03:13,884 Come on! 63 00:03:13,885 --> 00:03:15,886 What the hell? 64 00:03:15,887 --> 00:03:17,855 I dunno, there's some kind of blockage 65 00:03:17,856 --> 00:03:19,223 in front of the booze section. 66 00:03:19,224 --> 00:03:21,092 But this is ridiculous. 67 00:03:23,361 --> 00:03:26,363 Manager! Manager! 68 00:03:26,364 --> 00:03:27,565 Can I help you? 69 00:03:27,566 --> 00:03:29,500 Manager, there's a chain and sign 70 00:03:29,501 --> 00:03:31,201 blocking our way into the liquor aisle. 71 00:03:31,202 --> 00:03:33,737 Yes. We can't sell liquor during the holidays. 72 00:03:33,738 --> 00:03:36,206 Somebody got a new county ordinance passed. 73 00:03:36,207 --> 00:03:38,842 What? Who has that kind of power? 74 00:03:38,843 --> 00:03:41,512 It's Christmas, damn it! What are we supposed to drink?! 75 00:03:41,513 --> 00:03:44,148 You gotta just drink what you have at your house. 76 00:03:44,149 --> 00:03:45,583 [ Scoffs ] We drank it all 77 00:03:45,584 --> 00:03:47,818 before driving to the tree-lighting ceremony! 78 00:03:47,819 --> 00:03:49,254 All: Yeah! 79 00:03:51,056 --> 00:03:52,990 Hey, whoa, whoa, whoa! Wait! Hold on! 80 00:03:52,991 --> 00:03:55,392 Sorry, everyone. I've been shut down until the new year. 81 00:03:55,393 --> 00:03:57,228 No! Not you, too! 82 00:03:57,229 --> 00:03:59,697 You must have something you can give us. 83 00:03:59,698 --> 00:04:02,066 All I've got is this little bottle of peppermint schnapps, 84 00:04:02,067 --> 00:04:03,834 and it's barely enough for my drive home. 85 00:04:03,835 --> 00:04:06,837 I've got family coming over -- from out of town! 86 00:04:06,838 --> 00:04:09,107 You can't expect me to be sober! 87 00:04:10,175 --> 00:04:12,176 Skeeter! Thank God you're still open. 88 00:04:12,177 --> 00:04:13,677 Gimme a Cabernet, huh? 89 00:04:13,678 --> 00:04:15,246 And a couple bottles to take home. 90 00:04:15,247 --> 00:04:18,115 I got lemonade, soft drinks, and teas. 91 00:04:18,116 --> 00:04:21,118 That's all I can sell until January 2nd. 92 00:04:21,119 --> 00:04:22,620 Son of a bitch! 93 00:04:22,621 --> 00:04:24,622 This can't be happening. 94 00:04:24,623 --> 00:04:26,223 Hey, come on, guys. 95 00:04:26,224 --> 00:04:28,559 {\an1}It's still Christmas, and we have to make the best of it. 96 00:04:28,560 --> 00:04:30,728 How about we all drive around a little? 97 00:04:30,729 --> 00:04:32,930 Oh, what's the point, Jimbo?! 98 00:04:32,931 --> 00:04:34,865 What's the point of driving now? 99 00:04:34,866 --> 00:04:40,271 ♪ Silent night 100 00:04:40,272 --> 00:04:45,442 ♪ Holy night 101 00:04:45,443 --> 00:04:50,481 ♪ All is calm 102 00:04:50,482 --> 00:04:52,883 ♪ All is bright Nobody's out shopping. 103 00:04:52,884 --> 00:04:54,451 The town is dead. 104 00:04:54,452 --> 00:04:56,954 Our economy depends on the holidays. 105 00:04:56,955 --> 00:05:00,424 We don't know who passed the ordinance, Mayor, but... 106 00:05:00,425 --> 00:05:03,127 well, the people just feel let down. 107 00:05:03,128 --> 00:05:05,829 There's only one thing we can do. 108 00:05:05,830 --> 00:05:09,266 We're going to have to ask an old friend for help. 109 00:05:09,267 --> 00:05:13,138 And hope that he somehow forgives us. 110 00:05:17,409 --> 00:05:19,110 [ Tires screech ] 111 00:05:23,615 --> 00:05:25,317 [ Knock on door ] 112 00:05:28,153 --> 00:05:31,655 Hello, Mayor, everybody. 113 00:05:31,656 --> 00:05:33,324 What are you doing here? 114 00:05:33,325 --> 00:05:37,027 Mr. Marsh, South Park needs you. 115 00:05:37,028 --> 00:05:38,329 For what? 116 00:05:38,330 --> 00:05:40,197 Everyone's down in the dumps. 117 00:05:40,198 --> 00:05:43,867 Nobody's buying presents or going to holiday events. 118 00:05:43,868 --> 00:05:46,804 People -- they need some holiday spirit. 119 00:05:46,805 --> 00:05:48,939 We think that a little weed 120 00:05:48,940 --> 00:05:51,375 might put everyone in a better mood. 121 00:05:51,376 --> 00:05:54,278 Guys, my season is over. 122 00:05:54,279 --> 00:05:56,513 Tegridy Farms' season ended weeks ago. 123 00:05:56,514 --> 00:05:59,149 We understand, but couldn't you do, 124 00:05:59,150 --> 00:06:01,051 like, a limited-edition run 125 00:06:01,052 --> 00:06:03,154 just to get people through the holidays? 126 00:06:04,723 --> 00:06:08,359 You want me to do a Christmas special? 127 00:06:08,360 --> 00:06:12,363 Yes! South Park needs Tegridy Farms. 128 00:06:12,364 --> 00:06:13,964 We all do, Randy! 129 00:06:13,965 --> 00:06:15,499 But, guys, look behind you. 130 00:06:15,500 --> 00:06:17,001 The crops are dead. 131 00:06:17,002 --> 00:06:19,670 How am I supposed to sell weed to people now? 132 00:06:19,671 --> 00:06:22,072 I'll tell you how. 133 00:06:22,073 --> 00:06:24,208 Because you're Randy Marsh. 134 00:06:24,209 --> 00:06:27,044 And there's one thing you have that nobody else does -- 135 00:06:27,045 --> 00:06:28,245 tegridy. 136 00:06:28,246 --> 00:06:29,813 Tegridy. 137 00:06:29,814 --> 00:06:31,215 You're -- You're not gonna let 138 00:06:31,216 --> 00:06:33,517 a little cold weather stand in your way. 139 00:06:33,518 --> 00:06:35,853 Tegridy Farms is about community. 140 00:06:35,854 --> 00:06:38,522 And community is what matters. 141 00:06:38,523 --> 00:06:41,626 That's Tegridy. That's tegridy weed. 142 00:06:42,827 --> 00:06:45,362 Well, you're right about that. 143 00:06:45,363 --> 00:06:47,998 Lemme call my marijuana science specialist, 144 00:06:47,999 --> 00:06:51,101 and I'll see what I can do. 145 00:06:51,102 --> 00:06:55,907 Thank you, Marsh. And God bless Tegridy Farms. 146 00:06:58,243 --> 00:06:59,743 Look, I'm sorry, Randy, 147 00:06:59,744 --> 00:07:02,713 but marijuana simply doesn't grow in the cold. 148 00:07:02,714 --> 00:07:04,248 So we use the greenhouse. 149 00:07:04,249 --> 00:07:06,750 There's gotta be a way to make a Christmas special. 150 00:07:06,751 --> 00:07:08,686 It's what everyone wants. 151 00:07:08,687 --> 00:07:10,287 Hey, wait a minute! 152 00:07:10,288 --> 00:07:13,023 How about we repackage some of the surplus? 153 00:07:13,024 --> 00:07:15,859 We still have lots of leftover Mexican Joker. 154 00:07:15,860 --> 00:07:18,696 That's 'cause people didn't really like Mexican Joker. 155 00:07:18,697 --> 00:07:21,398 I'm not gonna just repackage it. That's not special. 156 00:07:21,399 --> 00:07:23,067 Okay, so, how about we combine 157 00:07:23,068 --> 00:07:24,802 what's left of the Mexican Joker 158 00:07:24,803 --> 00:07:26,737 with some of the Season Finale? 159 00:07:26,738 --> 00:07:27,771 Agh! 160 00:07:27,772 --> 00:07:28,906 What's wrong? 161 00:07:28,907 --> 00:07:29,974 It's just... 162 00:07:29,975 --> 00:07:31,709 it needs something else. 163 00:07:31,710 --> 00:07:34,545 Just mixing old product together and naming it something new -- 164 00:07:34,546 --> 00:07:37,147 that's not special, and it's not Tegridy. 165 00:07:37,148 --> 00:07:39,917 It's just not Tegridy. 166 00:07:39,918 --> 00:07:41,419 [ Sighs ] 167 00:07:43,288 --> 00:07:46,557 It's gonna be your birthday soon, Jesus. 168 00:07:46,558 --> 00:07:50,160 I wanna make something as special as you are. 169 00:07:50,161 --> 00:07:53,731 {\an1}I just need the right idea. 170 00:07:53,732 --> 00:07:57,702 [ Wind blowing ] 171 00:08:04,776 --> 00:08:07,278 [ Wind continues ] 172 00:08:07,279 --> 00:08:15,185 {\an7}♪ I'll have a blue Christmas 173 00:08:15,186 --> 00:08:17,087 {\an8}I hate the holidays. 174 00:08:17,088 --> 00:08:19,823 {\an8}Come on, Token, let's wrap it up and get out of here! 175 00:08:19,824 --> 00:08:22,626 {\an8}♪ I'll be so blue 176 00:08:22,627 --> 00:08:24,929 Dude, our parents seem really bummed out. 177 00:08:24,930 --> 00:08:26,830 Yeah, it's like someone came and took 178 00:08:26,831 --> 00:08:29,340 all their Christmas spirits. 179 00:08:29,341 --> 00:08:31,435 This isn't good, you guys. 180 00:08:31,436 --> 00:08:34,004 You know what it means when our parents have no Christmas spirit? 181 00:08:34,005 --> 00:08:35,105 Shitty presents. 182 00:08:35,106 --> 00:08:36,807 We're screwed, you guys. 183 00:08:36,808 --> 00:08:39,109 They just gotta get their Christmas spirits back! 184 00:08:39,110 --> 00:08:40,778 They just gotta! 185 00:08:40,779 --> 00:08:42,379 {\an1}[ Engine revving, horn honking ] 186 00:08:42,380 --> 00:08:43,981 Mrph rmh rmphm? 187 00:08:43,982 --> 00:08:45,950 {\an1}[ Revving, honking continues ] 188 00:08:45,951 --> 00:08:47,719 Look! 189 00:08:54,459 --> 00:08:56,961 Well, howdy there, folks. 190 00:08:56,962 --> 00:08:58,195 Randy? 191 00:08:58,196 --> 00:08:59,797 Heard you were all a little down 192 00:08:59,798 --> 00:09:01,332 and might need a boost. 193 00:09:01,333 --> 00:09:05,836 So I thought I'd bring you some Christmas Snow. 194 00:09:05,837 --> 00:09:10,207 [ Excited indistinct conversations ] 195 00:09:10,208 --> 00:09:12,777 Whoa, whoa. There's enough for everybody. 196 00:09:17,048 --> 00:09:19,316 Oh, wow, this smells great! 197 00:09:19,317 --> 00:09:21,218 Hey, what's this white stuff on the top? 198 00:09:21,219 --> 00:09:24,255 Just a little something extra for a special kick. 199 00:09:24,256 --> 00:09:26,223 Well, what are we waiting for, everyone?! 200 00:09:26,224 --> 00:09:28,726 Let's do some driving! [ Crowd cheers ] 201 00:09:28,727 --> 00:09:31,161 ♪ Bring out your bells, your Christmas bells ♪ 202 00:09:31,162 --> 00:09:34,498 ♪ Come on, we're going for a sleigh ride ♪ 203 00:09:34,499 --> 00:09:37,334 {\an1}♪ Christmas time is here again 204 00:09:37,335 --> 00:09:38,937 ♪ Come on, we're going for [ Cheering ] 205 00:09:40,413 --> 00:09:43,349 {\an8} Now back to the "Tegridy Farms Christmas Special!" 206 00:09:46,753 --> 00:09:49,783 [ Bang on door ] 207 00:09:49,784 --> 00:09:51,118 Oh, hi, Mayor. 208 00:09:51,119 --> 00:09:53,520 We need to talk, Marsh. 209 00:09:53,521 --> 00:09:55,188 What's going on? 210 00:09:55,189 --> 00:09:56,923 Are people not liking the Christmas special so far? 211 00:09:56,924 --> 00:09:59,693 Oh, people love the Christmas special. 212 00:09:59,694 --> 00:10:01,161 So... Marsh. 213 00:10:01,162 --> 00:10:05,436 What exactly is in this Christmas Snow? 214 00:10:05,437 --> 00:10:08,605 Okay, okay, look, you busted us. 215 00:10:08,606 --> 00:10:10,607 It's a mix of different strains of marijuana 216 00:10:10,608 --> 00:10:12,309 we had left over from last season. 217 00:10:12,310 --> 00:10:14,144 I know, it's wrong. 218 00:10:14,145 --> 00:10:17,948 No, no, no, what is the white stuff on the marijuana? 219 00:10:17,949 --> 00:10:19,950 Oh, that? That's cocaine. 220 00:10:19,951 --> 00:10:21,218 What?! 221 00:10:21,219 --> 00:10:23,020 Yeah, I got the idea praying to Christ. 222 00:10:23,021 --> 00:10:24,521 You know, powder, snow. 223 00:10:24,522 --> 00:10:26,857 It's what gives the Christmas special its kick. 224 00:10:26,858 --> 00:10:28,892 Getting enough cocaine was the tricky part, 225 00:10:28,893 --> 00:10:30,694 so we started growing our own. 226 00:10:30,695 --> 00:10:33,997 Turns out the coca plant is even hardier than marijuana plant. 227 00:10:33,998 --> 00:10:36,366 It can grow even when we're out of season. 228 00:10:36,367 --> 00:10:38,569 What is wrong with you?! 229 00:10:38,570 --> 00:10:41,138 We can't have you selling this stuff in town! 230 00:10:41,139 --> 00:10:43,407 Cocaine is illegal! 231 00:10:43,408 --> 00:10:46,310 It is? 232 00:10:46,311 --> 00:10:50,314 Jesus Christ, you can't just give people coke without them knowing! 233 00:10:50,315 --> 00:10:52,382 We could all go to prison! 234 00:10:52,383 --> 00:10:54,084 Hey, hey, it's not a big deal. 235 00:10:54,085 --> 00:10:55,819 I've been through this before. 236 00:10:55,820 --> 00:10:57,254 Hang on, I'll handle it. 237 00:10:57,255 --> 00:10:58,723 Don't go anywhere. 238 00:11:05,096 --> 00:11:06,530 Legalize it! 239 00:11:06,531 --> 00:11:08,133 Legalize it! 240 00:11:26,518 --> 00:11:28,752 Okay, cocaine's totally legal now. 241 00:11:28,753 --> 00:11:30,354 It -- It is? 242 00:11:30,355 --> 00:11:32,055 Yeah. Legal in seven states, including this one. 243 00:11:32,056 --> 00:11:33,290 Other states are soon to follow. 244 00:11:33,291 --> 00:11:35,660 I told you -- it's 2019, dawg. 245 00:11:38,296 --> 00:11:39,797 I'm sorry, Santa. 246 00:11:39,798 --> 00:11:41,799 I just can't think of anything I want this year. 247 00:11:41,800 --> 00:11:44,935 I guess maybe now I'm losing my Christmas spirit. 248 00:11:44,936 --> 00:11:48,372 Well, how about a little Baby Yoda doll? 249 00:11:48,373 --> 00:11:50,774 Nah. "Mandalorian" was great the first few episodes, 250 00:11:50,775 --> 00:11:52,109 but it's really fallen apart lately. 251 00:11:52,110 --> 00:11:53,377 [ Tires screech ] 252 00:11:53,378 --> 00:11:55,479 [ Crashing ] 253 00:11:55,480 --> 00:11:57,082 What on Earth? 254 00:11:58,650 --> 00:12:01,285 Merry Christmas. 255 00:12:01,286 --> 00:12:04,955 What the? How are people still drinking and driving? 256 00:12:04,956 --> 00:12:06,490 Oh, they aren't drunk, Santa. 257 00:12:06,491 --> 00:12:08,492 Everyone's just enjoying this. 258 00:12:08,493 --> 00:12:10,094 Tegridy Farms Christmas snow. 259 00:12:10,095 --> 00:12:12,796 It's organic, locally grown, and available now. 260 00:12:12,797 --> 00:12:14,598 -It's great, Santa! -Oh, you got to try it, Santa! 261 00:12:14,599 --> 00:12:16,967 [ Indistinct talking ] 262 00:12:16,968 --> 00:12:20,637 Marijuana?! This isn't what Santa meant! 263 00:12:20,638 --> 00:12:22,072 I got rid of liquor, 264 00:12:22,073 --> 00:12:24,608 and now you assholes are all just getting high?! 265 00:12:24,609 --> 00:12:26,777 God [bleep] damn it! 266 00:12:26,778 --> 00:12:29,147 Santa will just see about this! 267 00:12:30,648 --> 00:12:32,449 Our Christmas special is so amazing. 268 00:12:32,450 --> 00:12:34,618 {\an1}I don't know how we're gonna keep up with all the demand. 269 00:12:34,619 --> 00:12:37,788 I know. I know. I can't print labels fast enough. 270 00:12:37,789 --> 00:12:39,089 We need to get more help. 271 00:12:39,090 --> 00:12:40,357 We're never gonna get enough done in time. 272 00:12:40,358 --> 00:12:42,793 Hey, Shelley! Hey, Shelley! Hey, Shelley! 273 00:12:42,794 --> 00:12:44,261 What?! 274 00:12:44,262 --> 00:12:45,763 Hey, Shelley, can you help us make labels 275 00:12:45,764 --> 00:12:47,297 {\an1}for the Christmas special?! 276 00:12:47,298 --> 00:12:51,001 No! I'M not helping you with your stupid blow! 277 00:12:51,002 --> 00:12:53,370 Oh, great. My daughter had a marijuana problem, 278 00:12:53,371 --> 00:12:54,838 and now she has a problem with cocaine. 279 00:12:54,839 --> 00:12:56,306 [ Pounding ] 280 00:12:56,307 --> 00:12:58,076 Ah, must be more customers. 281 00:13:00,712 --> 00:13:02,279 What the hell is this? 282 00:13:02,280 --> 00:13:04,047 New ordinance has been passed by the county. 283 00:13:04,048 --> 00:13:06,550 No Marijuana sales till after the holidays. 284 00:13:06,551 --> 00:13:08,385 Hey. [Bleep] you. 285 00:13:08,386 --> 00:13:10,120 Who has that kind of power? 286 00:13:10,121 --> 00:13:11,688 Look, I just do what I'm told, man. 287 00:13:11,689 --> 00:13:12,956 Happy Holidays. 288 00:13:12,957 --> 00:13:15,859 Hey, but... You can't do this! 289 00:13:15,860 --> 00:13:17,961 They just shut down our business. 290 00:13:17,962 --> 00:13:19,363 What are you talking about? 291 00:13:19,364 --> 00:13:21,999 We can't sell marijuana during the holidays. 292 00:13:22,000 --> 00:13:23,534 What are we gonna do? 293 00:13:23,535 --> 00:13:26,136 We can't give up on the Christmas special. 294 00:13:26,137 --> 00:13:27,738 People need it. 295 00:13:27,739 --> 00:13:30,140 I think I know a way around this. 296 00:13:30,141 --> 00:13:33,911 [ Acoustic guitar plays ] 297 00:13:33,912 --> 00:13:37,548 Announcer: There's somethin' about the holiday season. 298 00:13:37,549 --> 00:13:43,987 Folks seem a little nicer, The days a little more special. 299 00:13:43,988 --> 00:13:46,557 And sometimes, we all need a little pick me up, 300 00:13:46,558 --> 00:13:49,560 but without any added ingredients. 301 00:13:49,561 --> 00:13:53,230 Introducing Marijuana-Free Christmas Snow 302 00:13:53,231 --> 00:13:55,566 from Tegridy farms. 303 00:13:55,567 --> 00:14:00,270 {\an1}All the festive snow you love without that pesky marijuana. 304 00:14:00,271 --> 00:14:03,107 Because there's nothin' like a warm fire, 305 00:14:03,108 --> 00:14:04,908 some holiday presents, 306 00:14:04,909 --> 00:14:08,178 and a little Rocky Mountain Cocaine. 307 00:14:08,179 --> 00:14:11,715 During Christmas, don't you want your cocaine to be organic, 308 00:14:11,716 --> 00:14:14,518 pure, and locally grown? 309 00:14:14,519 --> 00:14:17,755 Cocaine that's grown locally has never been smuggled, 310 00:14:17,756 --> 00:14:21,792 so the only ass it's gonna be up is yours. 311 00:14:21,793 --> 00:14:24,228 Marijuana-Free Christmas Snow, 312 00:14:24,229 --> 00:14:26,864 now available from Tegridy Farms. 313 00:14:26,865 --> 00:14:29,968 It's cocaine that's farm-to-nostril. 314 00:14:33,371 --> 00:14:36,775 {\an1}[ People shouting erratically ] 315 00:14:39,377 --> 00:14:42,312 Boy, people sure do have the holiday spirit now. 316 00:14:42,313 --> 00:14:43,580 Yeah. What the hell happened? 317 00:14:43,581 --> 00:14:44,982 It's weird, though. 318 00:14:44,983 --> 00:14:46,717 My parents have a lot of holiday spirit, 319 00:14:46,718 --> 00:14:48,819 but they sleep until about 3:00 in the afternoon every day. 320 00:14:48,820 --> 00:14:51,955 Yeah. Last night, my mom had a ton of holiday spirit, and then, passed out. 321 00:14:51,956 --> 00:14:53,791 She hasn't gone out to buy me any presents. 322 00:14:53,792 --> 00:14:55,492 Butters, your mom has so much holiday spirit 323 00:14:55,493 --> 00:14:57,561 that she's riding an ATV with her tits out. 324 00:14:57,562 --> 00:15:00,464 Christmas! Whoo! 325 00:15:00,465 --> 00:15:03,500 {\an1}Yeah, that's a little too much holiday spirit, if you ask me. 326 00:15:03,501 --> 00:15:04,935 There you are, ma'am. 327 00:15:04,936 --> 00:15:06,770 There you are, sir. 328 00:15:06,771 --> 00:15:08,338 This is amazing, Towelie. 329 00:15:08,339 --> 00:15:10,741 Tegridy Farms is finally going to make all the money 330 00:15:10,742 --> 00:15:12,609 I ever dreamed of. 331 00:15:12,610 --> 00:15:15,779 What the Sam hell is going on here? 332 00:15:15,780 --> 00:15:17,915 {\an1}[ All talking indistinctly ] 333 00:15:17,916 --> 00:15:20,517 Marijuana-Free Christmas snow? 334 00:15:20,518 --> 00:15:24,254 You people realize that tomorrow is Christmas Eve!? 335 00:15:24,255 --> 00:15:26,824 And it's gonna be the best Christmas ever! 336 00:15:26,825 --> 00:15:28,592 [ Tires screech ] 337 00:15:28,593 --> 00:15:31,995 [ Screaming, crashing ] 338 00:15:31,996 --> 00:15:34,098 [ Cheering ] 339 00:15:34,099 --> 00:15:36,634 Happy holidays! Whoo! 340 00:16:28,458 --> 00:16:30,659 Santa to base. Come in. 341 00:16:30,660 --> 00:16:32,795 Underpants Gnome: This is base. Go ahead, Santa. 342 00:16:32,796 --> 00:16:34,997 Sleigh is too loaded down to fly. 343 00:16:34,998 --> 00:16:36,465 Gonna have to take the roads 344 00:16:36,466 --> 00:16:38,434 until I find a place to dump all this blow. 345 00:16:38,435 --> 00:16:42,304 [ Engine whirring ] 346 00:16:42,305 --> 00:16:45,542 Hold on tight, Towelie. We have to save Christmas. 347 00:16:56,520 --> 00:16:58,188 Oh, shit! 348 00:17:02,025 --> 00:17:06,195 [ Yells ] 349 00:17:06,196 --> 00:17:10,633 {\an9}♪♪ 350 00:17:10,634 --> 00:17:12,668 The hell...? 351 00:17:12,669 --> 00:17:14,170 Linda! 352 00:17:14,171 --> 00:17:16,639 Did you do all my Marijuana-Free Christmas Snow? 353 00:17:16,640 --> 00:17:18,941 I was just gonna ask you the same thing. 354 00:17:18,942 --> 00:17:20,976 What are you talking about? 355 00:17:20,977 --> 00:17:23,512 Mine's all gone. You had another bender last night, didn't you? 356 00:17:23,513 --> 00:17:26,015 No! Clearly, you did! 357 00:17:26,016 --> 00:17:28,717 [ Knocking ] 358 00:17:28,718 --> 00:17:30,820 Thomas, we were just wondering if we could borrow 359 00:17:30,821 --> 00:17:32,121 a little Christmas Snow? 360 00:17:32,122 --> 00:17:33,556 You can't find yours, either? 361 00:17:33,557 --> 00:17:37,393 My wife's been searching all morning. 362 00:17:37,394 --> 00:17:39,795 The trash. We must have thrown it in the trash. 363 00:17:39,796 --> 00:17:41,063 It has to be here somewhere. 364 00:17:41,064 --> 00:17:42,565 [ Indistinct murmuring ] 365 00:17:42,566 --> 00:17:45,034 Alright listen, somebody obviously took 366 00:17:45,035 --> 00:17:47,036 everyone else's snow, and it's not cool! 367 00:17:47,037 --> 00:17:48,637 Come on! It's Christmas! 368 00:17:48,638 --> 00:17:51,807 Somebody has to have a little. I feel like total shit. 369 00:17:51,808 --> 00:17:53,342 It's gone, mkay! 370 00:17:53,343 --> 00:17:55,512 Just face it! It's all gone! 371 00:17:57,814 --> 00:17:59,148 Santa: This is Santa. 372 00:17:59,149 --> 00:18:01,050 The sleigh still isn't functional. 373 00:18:01,051 --> 00:18:03,018 Got some of it repaired, but I don't think 374 00:18:03,019 --> 00:18:05,754 I'm gonna make it back in time for Christmas. 375 00:18:05,755 --> 00:18:08,190 Hey, Santa? 376 00:18:08,191 --> 00:18:09,758 We need to talk. 377 00:18:09,759 --> 00:18:11,727 Stay back, mother[bleep] 378 00:18:11,728 --> 00:18:13,496 Santa, you don't understand. 379 00:18:13,497 --> 00:18:16,065 Oh, Santa understands plenty. 380 00:18:16,066 --> 00:18:19,001 You assholes drink and drive, and you think marijuana 381 00:18:19,002 --> 00:18:21,904 is somehow different, and go driving around on that, 382 00:18:21,905 --> 00:18:24,240 And then, you go and make this shit. 383 00:18:24,241 --> 00:18:27,009 Santa, that's not just cocaine. 384 00:18:27,010 --> 00:18:28,677 It's Tegridy cocaine. 385 00:18:28,678 --> 00:18:30,613 [ Acoustic guitar plays ] 386 00:18:30,614 --> 00:18:33,382 Oh, don't give Santa that. Coke is coke. 387 00:18:33,383 --> 00:18:34,917 That's not true. 388 00:18:34,918 --> 00:18:38,754 This cocaine is grown locally, by local people. 389 00:18:38,755 --> 00:18:40,456 Please, just try it. 390 00:18:40,457 --> 00:18:42,591 Santa's done coke before. Santa knows what -- 391 00:18:42,592 --> 00:18:43,927 Please. 392 00:18:46,029 --> 00:18:51,133 {\an9}♪♪ 393 00:18:51,134 --> 00:18:54,203 It's cocaine -- just like every other cocaine 394 00:18:54,204 --> 00:18:56,739 Santa's ever tried. 395 00:18:56,740 --> 00:18:59,809 You people really think that the holidays -- 396 00:18:59,810 --> 00:19:01,410 okay, yeah, that's pretty good. 397 00:19:01,411 --> 00:19:02,945 But it doesn't matter. 398 00:19:02,946 --> 00:19:05,281 Because Christmas is a... 399 00:19:05,282 --> 00:19:07,550 Wow, that is really clean. 400 00:19:07,551 --> 00:19:09,151 Right? 401 00:19:09,152 --> 00:19:12,822 It's, like, not speedy at all. It's really mellow. 402 00:19:12,823 --> 00:19:15,124 Honestly, I didn't know cocaine could be this pure. 403 00:19:15,125 --> 00:19:16,392 Wow. 404 00:19:16,393 --> 00:19:18,794 Because it's grown here, on a farm. 405 00:19:18,795 --> 00:19:22,932 It's not cut with any nasty chemicals or harmful impurities. 406 00:19:22,933 --> 00:19:24,934 No, you can tell it's really clean. 407 00:19:24,935 --> 00:19:26,436 Santa like-y. 408 00:19:28,738 --> 00:19:32,408 {\an1}Maybe I have been a little too old-fashioned in my thinking. 409 00:19:32,409 --> 00:19:34,945 Jesus: I can't believe what I am hearing! 410 00:19:38,615 --> 00:19:40,316 Oh, Jesus. 411 00:19:40,317 --> 00:19:43,586 I have heard your prayers, Marsh, and I have been watching. 412 00:19:43,587 --> 00:19:45,955 You want people to think that homegrown cocaine 413 00:19:45,956 --> 00:19:48,991 is the same as legalizing marijuana? 414 00:19:48,992 --> 00:19:50,926 Jesus, you really got to try it. 415 00:19:50,927 --> 00:19:52,194 No! 416 00:19:52,195 --> 00:19:53,829 You cut out the middle men. 417 00:19:53,830 --> 00:19:58,033 Nobody dies in South America. Nobody dies from impurities. 418 00:19:58,034 --> 00:19:59,836 Please, Jesus. 419 00:20:05,609 --> 00:20:07,676 Okay. I get it. It's really clean. 420 00:20:07,677 --> 00:20:09,445 It's... Yeah... 421 00:20:09,446 --> 00:20:10,679 It's a good high. 422 00:20:10,680 --> 00:20:12,448 It's [bleep] pure. 423 00:20:12,449 --> 00:20:14,016 It's Tegridy. 424 00:20:14,017 --> 00:20:16,051 Well,. maybe we all DO need a little Tegridy 425 00:20:16,052 --> 00:20:18,687 at Christmastime. 426 00:20:18,688 --> 00:20:20,790 What are you doing, Jesus? 427 00:20:20,791 --> 00:20:23,760 I think it's time for a little Christmas miracle. 428 00:20:41,745 --> 00:20:43,012 Hey. 429 00:20:43,013 --> 00:20:45,549 Hey! Hey, everybody! 430 00:20:56,026 --> 00:20:58,527 Try to catch some on your tongue. 431 00:20:58,528 --> 00:20:59,863 It's fun. 432 00:21:01,331 --> 00:21:03,432 {\an1}Does this mean you all have the Christmas spirit again! 433 00:21:03,433 --> 00:21:05,267 You're darn tootin', we do. 434 00:21:05,268 --> 00:21:07,203 [ Talking, cheering ] 435 00:21:07,204 --> 00:21:11,674 Hey, guys. I'm so happy my Christmas Special turned out okay. 436 00:21:11,675 --> 00:21:13,542 It's more than okay. 437 00:21:13,543 --> 00:21:17,079 Tegridy cocaine is smooth, and has a great finish. 438 00:21:17,080 --> 00:21:19,248 I'll bet when coke becomes legal soon, 439 00:21:19,249 --> 00:21:21,584 everyone will want Tegridy cocaine. 440 00:21:21,585 --> 00:21:24,420 Well only one thing left to do now, gang. 441 00:21:24,421 --> 00:21:26,622 Let's go driving! 442 00:21:26,623 --> 00:21:28,592 [ Cheering ] 443 00:21:32,562 --> 00:21:35,464 Announcer: All-natural Tegridy cocaine, 444 00:21:35,465 --> 00:21:38,801 endorsed and approved by Santa Claus. 445 00:21:38,802 --> 00:21:41,905 Available soon at a store near you. 446 00:21:46,042 --> 00:21:55,918 {\an9}♪♪ 447 00:21:55,919 --> 00:22:05,761 {\an9}♪♪ 448 00:22:05,762 --> 00:22:15,539 {\an9}♪♪ 36231

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