Original subtitles

[THEME - STRANGE EVENTS]

MAN (ON PHONE): I don't like this, Erin.

I'm coming home.

I'm fine.

We knew this was going to happen sooner or later.

It's fine.

I mean, even if you rented a car and drove,

you wouldn't be here 'til tomorrow morning.

MAN (ON PHONE): Let me call Kelly.

She'll at least--

I don't need a babysitter.

I'm fine.

Look, I haven't heard from them in a long time.

I'm sure they're not just going to suddenly show

up because you're not here.

I'm safe.

I'm inside.

I'll just lock the doors and be just fine.

MAN (ON PHONE): Will you promise me you'll take at least one?

Yes.

WOMAN (ON TV): Tell me I'm stupid and pathetic

and to leave you alone.

They've investigated my mother.

Thank God she's dead.

[SNIPPETS OF TV SHOWS]

[THUMP]

[LOUD NOISE]

[SIGHS]

[FLOORBOARD SQUEAKS]

[FOOTSTEPS APPROACH]

[SLAM]

[FLOORBOARD SQUEAKS]

WOMAN: Put it down.

You know they can't help you.

MAN (ON PHONE): 9-1-1, what's your emergency?

WOMAN: They'll only put you away again.

MAN (ON PHONE): Hello?

Hello, is anybody there?

Sorry.

Wrong number.

WOMAN: It's been awhile.

Do you miss us?

Why can't you just leave me alone?

GIRL: We're a part of you.

We always will be.

I don't need you anymore.

You've always needed us.

You're nothing without us.

I'm not listening to you.

You're not here.

Go away.

[SIGHS]

[CAR ACCELERATING]

MAN: Anal, oral, lick the clitoral.

Anal, oral, lick the clitoral.

All up on the floor.

All up on the floor, all up on the floor.

Put my thumb straight in your butt.

Yo.

What?

Shut up.

Dude, this is the shit.

You know it.

Yeah, until we get skinned alive

and turned into a fucking suit.

Dude, you are tripping.

Yeah, we'll see.

We'll see?

See this, bitch.

That is a hot ass girl from the internet wearing--

what is that?

Oh, that's right, nothing--

waiting for us right now.

Right.

Telling you to hurry.

To hurry on your flaccid ass up.

I'm just fucking saying.

Saying what?

Nothing.

Fuck.

Just-- what's the fucking address?

Uhh, what's that one?

21-- I don't know.

2031 Blair Drive.

It's 2033?

Or was it -43?

No, it was -33.

Genius.

How do you not write down the address?

Text her and ask.

I did it when we left.

But she's not answering now.

Well, forget it then.

We're not going.

Dude!

[INAUDIBLE],, I'm not rolling into some rich fool's house

and getting a face full of buckshot over some pussy

that probably don't even exist.

Forget it.

All right, Blake.

And that's not going to happen.

Because this is the right house.

I swear.

I swear.

This is stupid as fuck, man.

That girl is pretty fine.

Anonymous internet pussy.

All right.

- That's what I'm talking about. - All right, hold up though.

Look, I need, like, a weapon or something.

I don't want to go in there empty-handed.

I got my keys.

No, no.

Hold on.

Fist Pack.

Fist Pack?

Homie, that's a fucking cat.

No, no.

If you've got to hit a motherfucker,

you ball it up in your fist.

Makes your punch feel like Chris Brown and shit.

So eloquent.

You should be a philosopher.

No.

Stars are gay.

I'm going to die for pussy tonight.

Yeah.

Internet pussy.

Why Why do you carry a purse and and a cat around for, anyway?

Feelings ward off evil spirits.

Read up.

Please, Lord, watch over this family tonight.

Watch over Tina, Ryan, and me.

Mostly, please look over our Marley.

We just walk in, then?

That's what she said.

She said she'd be waiting for us.

She didn't say where?

No.

She just said we would know.

Lord, be on our side tonight.

We need you now more than ever.

Sure about this?

Right.

So we just go for it.

God, please just keep the evil out of our house--

We go up in this house--

--and out with my sister.

--then we go up in this bitch.

[MOANS]

What's up, girl?

Hello.

Sorry we're late.

You do all this for us?

Jesus, baby.

It is cold as hell in here.

I'll warm you up.

Just un-tie my hands.

Girl, what's the fun in that?

Un-tie me and find out.

All right, girl.

You don't waste any time.

[INAUDIBLE], don't.

No, Blake.

You don't.

Now, get over here and help me.

[INAUDIBLE].

[INAUDIBLE]

What?

Look!

There's fucking crosses and candles everywhere.

The shelves are empty.

So?

It's like 40 degrees in here.

Get to the point, dude.

This ain't for us.

And neither is she.

You're tripping, fool.

Dude, how did she tie both of her own hands up?

This is a God damn exorcism.

Un-tie me, you stupid fuck!

Who the hell are you guys?

[GROWLING]

You can't have her, priest.

She's mine.

It's too late.

There's nothing left of the bitch.

She's gone.

In the name of the Father, and of the Son,

and of the Holy Ghost, amen.

[GROWLING]

ALL (CHANTING): The Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost.

The Father, the Son, the Holy Ghost.

[SCREAMING]

[PRIEST CHANTING]

Here! Here!

Fist Pack.

WOMAN: No!

No!

Stop it!

Is it gone?

Hey, who gives a fuck?

Let's get the fuck out of here!

Umm, It was -43.

We can still go.

Chillin', posted on a rock.

Seeing the mermaid bitch playing the ukulele in the distance.

[SONG PLAYING]

Waves flowing.

Yeah.

Don't quote me on the pronunciation of this beer

I'm drinking.

It's either Duvel or Duvel.

I spill a few bars for you all.

You like Korea Town?

You are and I'm like aw, thanks.

I appreciate.

I'm bound to pop off, like a loose bra

in a brawl between too broads in the bar with him--