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1
00:00:00,010 --> 00:00:02,800
And we usually upload photos
to the app at lunchtime,
2
00:00:02,850 --> 00:00:04,250
so you can see what he's up to.
3
00:00:05,000 --> 00:00:07,000
- All right, see you.
- Yay!
4
00:00:07,760 --> 00:00:09,950
Not even a kiss goodbye. Look at him.
5
00:00:10,000 --> 00:00:11,910
Happy as a pig in shit.
6
00:00:11,960 --> 00:00:14,350
Well, that's that, then.
7
00:00:14,400 --> 00:00:15,950
Free at last.
8
00:00:16,000 --> 00:00:16,990
Got my days back.
9
00:00:17,040 --> 00:00:18,070
Woohoo!
10
00:00:18,120 --> 00:00:21,190
You can leave the buggy in
the lean-to by the front gate.
11
00:00:21,240 --> 00:00:24,510
Oh, it's fine, I'll take it with.
Stinks of Wotsits and vomit.
12
00:00:24,560 --> 00:00:26,870
Honestly, it saves you having
to go back for it at pick-up.
13
00:00:26,920 --> 00:00:29,950
No, it's fine, I keep everything in
the hood. I've got my keys in there,
14
00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:33,110
antihistamines, usually a bit of toast.
15
00:00:33,160 --> 00:00:36,510
- Look, let me put it in for...
- Get off my bloody buggy, OK?
16
00:00:36,560 --> 00:00:39,670
It's my buggy, so if I want to
take this buggy back with me,
17
00:00:39,720 --> 00:00:40,950
that's what I'm going to do,
18
00:00:41,000 --> 00:00:44,030
because it's my buggy and I know
what's best for it, all right?
19
00:00:44,080 --> 00:00:45,120
Come on, buggy.
20
00:00:50,440 --> 00:00:53,030
- Yes, what? - Hiya, I just
had a text from Evans Cycles
21
00:00:53,080 --> 00:00:55,790
saying they're delivering my new
bike sometime between now and 7pm.
22
00:00:55,840 --> 00:00:57,510
Can you sign for it?
23
00:00:57,560 --> 00:00:59,110
Paul, I am not a doorman.
24
00:00:59,160 --> 00:01:01,830
I'm working from home. Working.
I've just wasted the best part
25
00:01:01,880 --> 00:01:04,310
of the morning queuing at the
effing Post Office trying to return
26
00:01:04,360 --> 00:01:06,950
those cycling shorts with the
puffy bum that you didn't like.
27
00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:08,390
Just sign for it, Julia?
28
00:01:08,440 --> 00:01:10,350
Just sign for it, Julia.
29
00:01:12,840 --> 00:01:14,030
What are you doing, Paul?
30
00:01:14,080 --> 00:01:17,390
Oh, Ricky's punishing me because I
didn't stretch probably yesterday.
31
00:01:17,440 --> 00:01:19,750
Who's Ricky? Why aren't you at work?!
32
00:01:19,800 --> 00:01:22,550
I just nipped out of the office
for an hour's triathlon training.
33
00:01:22,600 --> 00:01:26,070
Don't worry, I'm going to work
late tonight to make up for it.
34
00:01:26,120 --> 00:01:27,350
Oh, that's brilliant!
35
00:01:27,400 --> 00:01:29,670
I'm so happy for you!
36
00:01:29,720 --> 00:01:32,830
Oh, hey, did you give any more
thought to letting the cleaner go
37
00:01:32,880 --> 00:01:35,040
now you're going to be
at home all the time?
38
00:01:50,960 --> 00:01:52,510
Yes, hi, I've left the door open.
39
00:01:52,560 --> 00:01:54,470
It looks shut, but it's actually open.
40
00:01:54,520 --> 00:01:56,590
It's just propped shut with a crock.
41
00:01:56,640 --> 00:01:58,110
- You have to sign for it.
- Huh?
42
00:01:58,160 --> 00:02:01,110
- You have to sign for it.
- You can just forge my signature.
43
00:02:01,160 --> 00:02:05,350
It's Julia, it's just Julia with a big...
44
00:02:05,400 --> 00:02:07,120
God's sake.
45
00:02:31,320 --> 00:02:32,990
- Yo?
- Is that Ivy's mum?
46
00:02:33,040 --> 00:02:36,590
- No. - I've got Ivy here. She
appears not to have her lunch.
47
00:02:36,640 --> 00:02:39,750
She says she can't remember if
she ate it on the way to school
48
00:02:39,800 --> 00:02:41,070
or left it in the car.
49
00:02:41,120 --> 00:02:43,030
Yes, well, I'm at work. I'm working so...
50
00:02:43,080 --> 00:02:45,270
If I was a surgeon, would
you call me in theatre?
51
00:02:45,320 --> 00:02:46,750
Are you a surgeon?
52
00:02:46,800 --> 00:02:49,470
I think you know full well that
I'm not a surgeon, Mrs Lamb,
53
00:02:49,520 --> 00:02:52,510
I work in fast-moving luxury goods, FMLG.
54
00:02:52,560 --> 00:02:54,590
Can she share your sandwich with you?
55
00:02:54,640 --> 00:02:56,590
I'm having a naked burrito.
56
00:02:56,640 --> 00:02:57,790
Well, then can she...?
57
00:02:57,840 --> 00:03:00,430
- No, she can't.
- Can I Deliveroo?
58
00:03:00,480 --> 00:03:01,720
Hello?
59
00:03:12,640 --> 00:03:15,950
- Yes? - Package for Paul Johnstone?
- Yeah, no, just put it in the bin.
60
00:03:16,000 --> 00:03:18,870
- What?
- Just put it in the bin.
61
00:03:18,920 --> 00:03:21,560
- Thank you.
- Yeah, I need you to sign for it.
62
00:03:23,680 --> 00:03:25,070
Oi, Julia. I'm no Zaha Hadid
63
00:03:25,120 --> 00:03:27,480
- but your chimney's
looking a bit dodge. - What?
64
00:03:31,800 --> 00:03:33,630
Oh, God! Oh, yeah.
65
00:03:33,680 --> 00:03:36,110
OK, well, I'll just, um,
shimmy up the drainpipe and have
66
00:03:36,160 --> 00:03:38,950
a little look at that. Thank God I
have a City & Guilds in chimneys.
67
00:03:39,000 --> 00:03:41,110
- What's wrong with you?
- No, it's just I...
68
00:03:41,160 --> 00:03:42,350
I've got a lot of work to do
69
00:03:42,400 --> 00:03:44,190
and I've done nothing.
I have done nothing!
70
00:03:44,240 --> 00:03:46,470
No, not nothing, I've done
everything but my work.
71
00:03:46,520 --> 00:03:49,230
- Mother's load, mate.
- Huh?
72
00:03:49,280 --> 00:03:51,670
All the shit that we have to deal
with that no other twat does.
73
00:03:51,720 --> 00:03:53,830
It's full-time and it's unquantifiable.
74
00:03:53,880 --> 00:03:56,470
- You've got to dump your mother's load.
- How... How do I do that?
75
00:03:56,520 --> 00:03:58,270
Well, I flew my mother
over from Guadeloupe
76
00:03:58,320 --> 00:04:00,950
so my mother's load is
literally my mother's load.
77
00:04:01,000 --> 00:04:03,350
No, I can't tempt my
mother up from Leatherhead.
78
00:04:03,400 --> 00:04:05,070
So, that's not going to... That's not...
79
00:04:05,120 --> 00:04:07,630
Well, then just don't make yourself
available. Get out the house, babe.
80
00:04:07,680 --> 00:04:09,710
If you're not there then they
can't ask you to do anything.
81
00:04:09,760 --> 00:04:11,590
Yeah, where you parked?
82
00:04:11,640 --> 00:04:13,790
Seriously, though, sort that chimney out.
83
00:04:13,840 --> 00:04:16,150
I can see it from my bog and
it's messing with my OCD.
84
00:04:16,200 --> 00:04:17,920
Yeah, I'm just around the corner.
85
00:04:19,760 --> 00:04:22,510
So, how much do we need to
raise for the goalposts?
86
00:04:22,560 --> 00:04:24,230
Well, what about the girls?
87
00:04:24,280 --> 00:04:25,790
What about their sporting needs?
88
00:04:25,840 --> 00:04:28,190
There was this terrific
tampons ad on recently.
89
00:04:28,240 --> 00:04:29,870
I don't know whether you saw it.
90
00:04:29,920 --> 00:04:33,310
It was all about how girls
can do anything boys can,
91
00:04:33,360 --> 00:04:34,750
including karate.
92
00:04:34,800 --> 00:04:37,150
I thought that was a no-go on your periods
93
00:04:37,200 --> 00:04:40,230
because of the white trousers,
but apparently not any more.
94
00:04:40,280 --> 00:04:43,030
There's a girls football team now,
Kevin, since the start of term.
95
00:04:43,080 --> 00:04:47,430
Oh, right. Sorry, I missed that.
New job's a bit all-consuming.
96
00:04:47,480 --> 00:04:49,670
There's a queue of punters
outside your shop, Amanda.
97
00:04:49,720 --> 00:04:51,310
Looking for candle cages?
98
00:04:51,360 --> 00:04:53,230
- Oh, my God. Anne, can
you go check? - Yeah.
99
00:04:53,280 --> 00:04:55,270
As if.
100
00:04:55,320 --> 00:04:58,150
- What have I missed?
- Fundraising for the new goalposts.
101
00:04:58,200 --> 00:04:59,870
The kids have done their self-portraits
102
00:04:59,920 --> 00:05:01,550
and we're going to print
them on tea towels
103
00:05:01,600 --> 00:05:03,350
- and sell them to ourselves.
- Course you are.
104
00:05:03,400 --> 00:05:06,670
Right, so we need a volunteer to get
them printed. As a working mother,
105
00:05:06,720 --> 00:05:09,270
I obviously can't do it cos I've
just launched my new venture,
106
00:05:09,320 --> 00:05:10,350
and as a working mother,
107
00:05:10,400 --> 00:05:12,390
it's impossible to be
in three places at once.
108
00:05:12,440 --> 00:05:15,230
Well, Charlie's at school and
Max has just started nursery,
109
00:05:15,280 --> 00:05:18,190
so I'm definitely not doing it.
110
00:05:18,240 --> 00:05:21,110
Julia, are you coming to join us?
111
00:05:21,160 --> 00:05:23,670
No, I'm not here. Don't
look at me. I'm working.
112
00:05:23,720 --> 00:05:26,270
I need to grab the table with the plug.
113
00:05:26,320 --> 00:05:28,630
A flat white and the code
for the Wi-Fi, please.
114
00:05:28,680 --> 00:05:31,750
Yeah, it's Emilio Estevez,
all one word, all lower case,
115
00:05:31,800 --> 00:05:33,870
apart from the Z which is a five,
116
00:05:33,920 --> 00:05:36,430
and all the I's are exclamation marks.
117
00:05:36,480 --> 00:05:39,190
All right, so who's going to
do the tea towel thing, then?
118
00:05:39,240 --> 00:05:42,030
Anyone? Guys...?
119
00:05:42,080 --> 00:05:45,150
This is normally the thing I love
doing, but it's a bit tricky now
120
00:05:45,200 --> 00:05:46,990
with the old nine-to-five.
121
00:05:47,040 --> 00:05:50,670
Come on! Guys, I know, ask
a busy person and all that,
122
00:05:50,720 --> 00:05:53,270
but I'm close to a nervous
exhaustion breakdown.
123
00:05:53,320 --> 00:05:54,600
OK?
124
00:05:56,080 --> 00:05:57,390
Anyone?
125
00:05:57,440 --> 00:06:00,830
Don't be a martyr, Kev. You've
got enough on your plate.
126
00:06:00,880 --> 00:06:03,750
- Who's going to be a hero?
- I guess I could do... - Thanks, K-Dog.
127
00:06:03,800 --> 00:06:07,150
It's fine, honestly. I can
scan the pictures at work.
128
00:06:07,200 --> 00:06:08,720
- Kevin.
- Oh.
129
00:06:09,840 --> 00:06:13,150
Oh! Look at them all.
130
00:06:13,200 --> 00:06:17,320
- Oh, that one's a bit...
- He will definitely start killing cats soon.
131
00:06:19,880 --> 00:06:23,350
Yeah, there was no-one there.
Yeah, I think it was a joke.
132
00:06:23,400 --> 00:06:26,990
- I think Liz was pulling your leg.
- YOUR leg, Anne.
133
00:06:29,320 --> 00:06:31,750
Oh, that's really sweet.
134
00:06:31,800 --> 00:06:34,150
Johnny's coming over for Thursday night.
135
00:06:34,200 --> 00:06:36,470
We laugh, we're like Taylor and Burton.
136
00:06:36,520 --> 00:06:38,280
Bet we get bloody married again.
137
00:06:39,920 --> 00:06:43,190
Right, I'm offskis --
interviewing an assistant today.
138
00:06:43,240 --> 00:06:45,070
I just have no time any more.
139
00:06:45,120 --> 00:06:48,590
First moment I stopped yesterday
after breakfast was 1pm for lunch.
140
00:06:48,640 --> 00:06:49,870
What did you have for lunch?
141
00:06:49,920 --> 00:06:53,310
And I have to fit in
my PT sessions somehow.
142
00:06:53,360 --> 00:06:56,190
I haven't had my roots done in weeks.
143
00:06:56,240 --> 00:06:58,600
I'm literally going to seed here, people!
144
00:06:59,840 --> 00:07:02,390
- Oh, no, you look
great. - Yes. - Gorgeous.
145
00:07:02,440 --> 00:07:05,150
- Shut up.
- Thanks, girls.
146
00:07:05,200 --> 00:07:09,470
Just... God, no-one told me
having it all would be so hard.
147
00:07:09,520 --> 00:07:12,520
- Tell me about it.
- Only women can say that, Kevin.
148
00:07:17,520 --> 00:07:19,790
You all right? What you doing?
149
00:07:19,840 --> 00:07:22,510
Um, yes, I just had to get out of
the house, you know, mother's load.
150
00:07:22,560 --> 00:07:24,670
I'm just trying to import my
database from Outlook to...
151
00:07:24,720 --> 00:07:26,600
Oh, that's brilliant, bye.
152
00:07:28,360 --> 00:07:30,990
- Can I ask you a question?
- Yes, what? Quick.
153
00:07:31,040 --> 00:07:33,670
It's just I think men can
struggle to have it all, too.
154
00:07:33,720 --> 00:07:36,760
- Sorry, I haven't got time for this, Kevin.
- OK, sorry. My bad.
155
00:08:01,760 --> 00:08:03,870
So, a bit about Brand Amanda.
156
00:08:03,920 --> 00:08:08,190
This may all look effortlessly
thrown together but every aspect
157
00:08:08,240 --> 00:08:09,870
in the store has been curated by me.
158
00:08:09,920 --> 00:08:12,590
And when you are in the store,
you are an extension of me.
159
00:08:12,640 --> 00:08:15,470
You... No, you are a conduit...
160
00:08:15,520 --> 00:08:16,880
.. to me.
161
00:08:18,200 --> 00:08:19,870
Sorry, what are you doing?
162
00:08:19,920 --> 00:08:23,390
- Just Googling the word "conduit."
- It just means when people see you,
163
00:08:23,440 --> 00:08:26,120
they should be getting the essence of me.
164
00:08:27,160 --> 00:08:29,750
- So, like a younger you?
- No, just a me.
165
00:08:29,800 --> 00:08:31,430
Now, I think it's worth flagging up,
166
00:08:31,480 --> 00:08:34,230
I am a mumtrepreneur -- very much
mum first, trepreneur second,
167
00:08:34,280 --> 00:08:36,190
so I'm not just a businesswoman,
168
00:08:36,240 --> 00:08:40,150
I'm also a successful co-partner
and mother. Sort of in...
169
00:08:40,200 --> 00:08:44,150
- .. the SamCam mould. - Or
Kylie Jenner. - Or SamCam.
170
00:08:44,200 --> 00:08:47,070
Now, what I'm looking for
is someone to do stuff
171
00:08:47,120 --> 00:08:48,710
like deal with customers,
172
00:08:48,760 --> 00:08:51,750
lock up shop and take the bins out.
173
00:08:51,800 --> 00:08:54,910
So, an executive assistant.
174
00:08:54,960 --> 00:08:59,310
- That sounds more like
just an assistant. - Rose...
175
00:08:59,360 --> 00:09:02,470
.. don't put yourself down. Fly high.
176
00:09:02,520 --> 00:09:04,720
Now, do you have any questions?
177
00:09:06,080 --> 00:09:09,310
What perfume are you
wearing? It smells amazing.
178
00:09:09,360 --> 00:09:11,000
Thank you. Uh...
179
00:09:12,280 --> 00:09:13,950
I don't know, it's just me...
180
00:09:14,000 --> 00:09:15,390
.. and two dabs of Tom Ford.
181
00:09:15,440 --> 00:09:17,760
Do you know what? You are actually hired.
182
00:09:21,160 --> 00:09:23,590
Hi, this is Nick from Shalamar PR.
183
00:09:23,640 --> 00:09:26,670
Just checking you got my e-mail
about the embargo being lifted
184
00:09:26,720 --> 00:09:29,630
on reporting the winners
of the Festival of Light.
185
00:09:29,680 --> 00:09:31,510
Brilliant!
186
00:09:31,560 --> 00:09:34,230
All right. Right, bye.
187
00:09:34,280 --> 00:09:37,230
Bye. Bye.
188
00:09:37,280 --> 00:09:39,550
Hi! You wouldn't mind
watching the old laptop
189
00:09:39,600 --> 00:09:41,790
while I go for a quick
number one, would you?
190
00:09:41,840 --> 00:09:45,190
No, not at all, but if it gets
nicked, it's not my problem.
191
00:09:45,240 --> 00:09:46,280
Bless you.
192
00:09:47,400 --> 00:09:49,470
Oh, look at that, you work in PR!
193
00:09:49,520 --> 00:09:52,550
- I work in PR too!
- Yes, I think I overheard that.
194
00:09:52,600 --> 00:09:55,950
No, I'm more the, um....
FMLG side of things.
195
00:09:56,000 --> 00:09:58,270
That's my metier, as it were.
196
00:09:58,320 --> 00:10:00,270
Arts and culture.
197
00:10:00,320 --> 00:10:02,600
- Nick from Shalamar PR.
- Julia Johnstone...
198
00:10:03,960 --> 00:10:06,630
.. from Julia Johnstone PR.
199
00:10:06,680 --> 00:10:08,720
Gosh! That's a weak handshake!
200
00:10:25,000 --> 00:10:28,510
All right, guys, it's two minutes to ten.
201
00:10:28,560 --> 00:10:30,590
You know what that means.
202
00:10:31,640 --> 00:10:32,990
Woo!
203
00:10:33,040 --> 00:10:35,280
Yes! Come on!
204
00:10:36,520 --> 00:10:37,680
Yeah!
205
00:10:38,800 --> 00:10:40,870
Hey, Kevin! Kevin!
206
00:10:40,920 --> 00:10:42,110
- And you, Yvonne!
- Yes.
207
00:10:42,160 --> 00:10:43,350
- Yes, sorry.
- Come on.
208
00:10:43,400 --> 00:10:44,510
Let's go for it.
209
00:10:44,560 --> 00:10:46,630
Woo! Come on! Woo!
210
00:10:46,680 --> 00:10:48,670
Yes! Give it all you've got!
211
00:10:48,720 --> 00:10:49,990
Yeah! Yeah!
212
00:10:50,040 --> 00:10:52,400
Everyone huddle!
213
00:10:53,920 --> 00:10:55,070
Right.
214
00:10:55,120 --> 00:10:56,310
We're about to open,
215
00:10:56,360 --> 00:10:59,150
and I just want to say have a great day.
216
00:11:11,880 --> 00:11:14,590
Um, did anyone see the...?
217
00:11:14,640 --> 00:11:17,270
I left a stack of kiddie pics here.
218
00:11:17,320 --> 00:11:18,600
They were just here.
219
00:11:19,640 --> 00:11:21,310
This is my own fault, really.
220
00:11:21,360 --> 00:11:23,150
I shouldn't have brought them to work.
221
00:11:23,200 --> 00:11:25,350
They're my private pics.
222
00:11:25,400 --> 00:11:28,790
I mean, they're not pics of my own kids...
223
00:11:28,840 --> 00:11:30,310
Well, I mean, one of them is,
224
00:11:30,360 --> 00:11:32,590
but the rest are other people's kids.
225
00:11:32,640 --> 00:11:34,880
I'm going to get in a
lot of trouble for this.
226
00:11:45,960 --> 00:11:47,510
I mean, she's a godsend.
227
00:11:47,560 --> 00:11:50,230
It's kind of a big sister/little
sister thing, you know?
228
00:11:50,280 --> 00:11:52,710
Or a mother/daughter kind of thing.
229
00:11:52,760 --> 00:11:54,270
Well, she couldn't be my daughter, Anne,
230
00:11:54,320 --> 00:11:56,030
because I didn't get my
periods till I was 16,
231
00:11:56,080 --> 00:11:58,430
so... you do the math.
232
00:11:58,480 --> 00:11:59,950
Could've had her when you were 24.
233
00:12:00,000 --> 00:12:01,550
I couldn't have had her
when I was 24, Anne,
234
00:12:01,600 --> 00:12:03,830
because I was doing the ski season
in Val d'Isere when I was 24.
235
00:12:03,880 --> 00:12:05,680
Just meant theoretically.
236
00:12:09,040 --> 00:12:11,670
- Where did the day go?
- Do you have an assistant, Meg?
237
00:12:11,720 --> 00:12:13,030
Yeah. I've got three.
238
00:12:13,080 --> 00:12:14,630
They're all bloody useless.
239
00:12:14,680 --> 00:12:16,870
One of them was on the
last series of Love Island,
240
00:12:16,920 --> 00:12:17,950
and we didn't realise
241
00:12:18,000 --> 00:12:20,030
until we saw her getting her
tits sucked in a hot tub.
242
00:12:20,080 --> 00:12:24,790
Sorry, h-h-how can you afford an
assistant? I'd love an assistant.
243
00:12:24,840 --> 00:12:27,790
Not even an assistant, just more
sort of like a carer really --
244
00:12:27,840 --> 00:12:30,350
just someone who'd come in,
get me up, give me a yogurt,
245
00:12:30,400 --> 00:12:31,630
flush the toilet...
246
00:12:31,680 --> 00:12:33,790
Oh, God, where's the baby?!
247
00:12:33,840 --> 00:12:35,920
Oh, no, sorry -- he's still at nursery.
248
00:12:36,920 --> 00:12:40,510
Has anyone got a good
contact for a chimney fixer?
249
00:12:40,560 --> 00:12:43,430
- Oh, do you mean a sweep
or a roofer? - A roofer.
250
00:12:43,480 --> 00:12:45,990
No, unfortunately I only
have the number of a sweep.
251
00:12:46,040 --> 00:12:48,990
Kathleen. Do you want me to airdrop
her contact details to you?
252
00:12:49,040 --> 00:12:51,510
No, no, I don't need a
sweep, Anne. Hi, Kevin.
253
00:12:51,560 --> 00:12:54,560
Hi, Julia. I'm a bit late. Sorry
I'm late. I hate being late.
254
00:12:55,760 --> 00:12:58,190
- Liz, you're never going
to believe this. - What?
255
00:12:58,240 --> 00:13:00,910
I've lost all the...
the tea towel portraits.
256
00:13:00,960 --> 00:13:03,270
The kids' portraits. They've gone.
257
00:13:03,320 --> 00:13:05,510
All right, so what's the big
deal? Just draw them again.
258
00:13:05,560 --> 00:13:08,670
What, me draw them? I can't do that, Liz!
259
00:13:08,720 --> 00:13:10,710
That's forgery!
260
00:13:10,760 --> 00:13:12,070
For fuck's sake, Kev.
261
00:13:12,120 --> 00:13:14,960
It's for a charity tea towel,
not the Bank of England.
262
00:13:19,160 --> 00:13:21,630
I said lights out. Now.
263
00:13:21,680 --> 00:13:23,750
Come on. It's 7:45, guys.
264
00:13:23,800 --> 00:13:24,960
Mum's trying to chill.
265
00:13:28,840 --> 00:13:30,150
Jill?
266
00:13:30,200 --> 00:13:34,070
Jill, is it OK to use the
hot water tap to do the pots
267
00:13:34,120 --> 00:13:36,990
or is that going to ruin your bath?
268
00:13:37,040 --> 00:13:38,080
Jill?
269
00:13:39,600 --> 00:13:41,080
Ji... I'll leave them.
270
00:14:12,560 --> 00:14:13,710
Thank you.
271
00:14:13,760 --> 00:14:14,840
Yes.
272
00:14:20,760 --> 00:14:23,230
- Hey, hon. - Hi. - Do
you mind if we twosies?
273
00:14:23,280 --> 00:14:24,430
Oh, I'm really sorry,
274
00:14:24,480 --> 00:14:26,910
- there's only one plug socket and I
got here first. - I've got an adaptor.
275
00:14:26,960 --> 00:14:30,830
I work in cafes all the time
so I know all the tricks.
276
00:14:30,880 --> 00:14:32,110
Right.
277
00:14:32,160 --> 00:14:34,470
- Great.
- Bless you.
278
00:14:41,200 --> 00:14:43,150
- Are you going to
order something? - Yes.
279
00:14:43,200 --> 00:14:45,510
I just... I need to send an urgent
e-mail and then I will be straight
280
00:14:45,560 --> 00:14:46,950
over to order a small coffee.
281
00:14:47,000 --> 00:14:49,390
Yeah, it's just that we need these
tables for people who are...
282
00:14:49,440 --> 00:14:50,550
Leo, love...
283
00:14:50,600 --> 00:14:52,150
.. she's going to order a small coffee
284
00:14:52,200 --> 00:14:54,200
when she's ready to order a small coffee.
285
00:14:58,000 --> 00:14:59,470
He's so uptight, right?
286
00:15:03,560 --> 00:15:05,470
Oh, no way...
287
00:15:05,520 --> 00:15:07,350
Do you want me to get that for you?
288
00:15:07,400 --> 00:15:09,350
Just say you're unavailable.
289
00:15:09,400 --> 00:15:10,760
Would you mind?
290
00:15:11,800 --> 00:15:13,040
Thank you.
291
00:15:14,560 --> 00:15:17,080
Hi, this is Julia Johnstone PR.
292
00:15:18,160 --> 00:15:20,480
I'm sorry, she's not
available at the moment.
293
00:15:22,480 --> 00:15:24,830
All right. Well, I'll
pass on your message.
294
00:15:24,880 --> 00:15:26,190
All right.
295
00:15:26,240 --> 00:15:28,030
Thanks, Lucy.
296
00:15:30,440 --> 00:15:35,150
You are an... excellent fake PA.
297
00:15:35,200 --> 00:15:37,230
Well, it's just something
my friend Sandra and I
298
00:15:37,280 --> 00:15:39,470
used to do for each other
when we first started.
299
00:15:39,520 --> 00:15:42,310
Yeah. Hey, you... Maybe
you and me could, um...
300
00:15:42,360 --> 00:15:44,630
.. you know, do it for each other, or...
301
00:15:49,560 --> 00:15:51,240
- Pass it here, babe.
- Thank you!
302
00:15:54,240 --> 00:15:56,230
Hi, this is Julia Johnstone PR.
303
00:15:56,280 --> 00:15:57,680
Nick, speaking.
304
00:15:59,160 --> 00:16:01,070
I'll just see if she's available.
305
00:16:01,120 --> 00:16:03,750
- It's Rachel from Blossom.
- Oh, yeah. Yeah, great.
306
00:16:03,800 --> 00:16:05,230
Rachel? Hi.
307
00:16:05,280 --> 00:16:07,720
Yes, my new PA. Yeah. He's great.
308
00:16:08,960 --> 00:16:11,190
Sorry, could you just hold on a sec?
309
00:16:11,240 --> 00:16:13,320
Nick, would you mind getting me a coffee?
310
00:16:17,880 --> 00:16:19,120
Rachel.
311
00:16:20,120 --> 00:16:22,670
Yeah. Can you get me up to speed on that?
312
00:16:22,720 --> 00:16:24,910
Actually, sorry, hold on one sec.
313
00:16:24,960 --> 00:16:26,990
Actually, could you get me a coffee?
314
00:16:27,040 --> 00:16:28,080
Rachel?
315
00:16:42,400 --> 00:16:43,880
Where's the kids' drawings?
316
00:17:26,640 --> 00:17:28,190
Oh!
317
00:17:28,240 --> 00:17:30,070
Oh, my God.
318
00:17:30,120 --> 00:17:31,990
I just did aerial yoga.
319
00:17:32,040 --> 00:17:34,910
Seriously, I need to measure
myself -- I swear I've got taller.
320
00:17:34,960 --> 00:17:37,110
- Rose, do you mind if I stretch?
- No, that's fine.
321
00:17:37,160 --> 00:17:38,200
Oh...
322
00:17:39,320 --> 00:17:40,790
What?
323
00:17:40,840 --> 00:17:43,150
Rose, you are inked! What is it?
324
00:17:43,200 --> 00:17:45,870
Oh, it's by the same artist who
did all of Wolf Alice's tats.
325
00:17:45,920 --> 00:17:48,110
Oh, I love her... him...
326
00:17:48,160 --> 00:17:49,270
- It's a band.
- .. them.
327
00:17:49,320 --> 00:17:51,470
I was thinking of getting
one done myself, actually.
328
00:17:51,520 --> 00:17:53,630
Just something that
expresses me and my vibe.
329
00:17:53,680 --> 00:17:56,320
A tiny little star
tattoo on my inner wrist.
330
00:17:57,360 --> 00:18:01,150
Then I thought, my God, I'm
way too old for a tattoo!
331
00:18:01,200 --> 00:18:02,800
Don't let that stop you.
332
00:18:04,040 --> 00:18:07,390
- Did you book my hair appointment, Rose?
- 10am, all in the G-cal.
333
00:18:07,440 --> 00:18:10,350
Already don't know what
I'd do without you.
334
00:18:10,400 --> 00:18:11,910
Hang on, it says...
335
00:18:11,960 --> 00:18:13,110
It says it's with Lali.
336
00:18:13,160 --> 00:18:14,510
Yeah. Julio wasn't free.
337
00:18:14,560 --> 00:18:15,790
Did you say it was for me?
338
00:18:15,840 --> 00:18:17,280
Um... yeah.
339
00:18:18,800 --> 00:18:20,830
OK. Well, it's not going to work.
340
00:18:20,880 --> 00:18:22,950
It has to be Julio. Erm...
341
00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:24,230
OK, I'll sort this.
342
00:18:24,280 --> 00:18:27,110
But, next time, just make
sure you say it's for me.
343
00:18:27,160 --> 00:18:28,910
- I did say it was for you
- Next time, say my name.
344
00:18:28,960 --> 00:18:30,710
- I did. - Amanda.
- Yeah, I said Amanda.
345
00:18:30,760 --> 00:18:34,670
Yeah. You just need to make sure
they know exactly who it is for.
346
00:18:34,720 --> 00:18:37,350
But anyway... not a big deal.
347
00:18:37,400 --> 00:18:39,630
Chalk it up to inexperience.
348
00:18:39,680 --> 00:18:40,990
OK.
349
00:18:41,040 --> 00:18:43,110
Where do you get your hair
done? It always looks so great.
350
00:18:43,160 --> 00:18:44,560
Oh, I just... do it myself.
351
00:18:47,040 --> 00:18:49,030
Rose, will you move your Bento box?
352
00:18:49,080 --> 00:18:51,230
It's just the salad's
starting to smell a bit.
353
00:18:51,280 --> 00:18:52,760
- Yeah, of course.
- Thank you.
354
00:18:58,720 --> 00:19:00,510
Oh, thanks, mate, you're a life-saver.
355
00:19:00,560 --> 00:19:02,790
It's all right. I was
going past one anyway.
356
00:19:02,840 --> 00:19:05,230
Oh, God, have you ever had
the Loyd Grossman puttanesca?
357
00:19:05,280 --> 00:19:08,390
It's delicious. It just really
tampers with your acids.
358
00:19:08,440 --> 00:19:11,790
You know, I heard on QI that
"putta" is Italian for whore,
359
00:19:11,840 --> 00:19:14,030
so puttanesca is "whore sauce."
360
00:19:14,080 --> 00:19:15,630
Whore sauce?
361
00:19:15,680 --> 00:19:18,390
I saw that in the West End
with the original cast.
362
00:19:23,480 --> 00:19:26,830
Oh, Nick, mate, did you manage
to find that number for the...
363
00:19:26,880 --> 00:19:29,550
- .. the chimney guy that you mentioned?
- Oh, yeah. Erm, yeah...
364
00:19:29,600 --> 00:19:32,950
I've just got... I'm just going
to respond to my accountant.
365
00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:35,160
OK. Yeah. No. Do, do, do, do, do. do.
366
00:19:40,560 --> 00:19:41,630
That's... That's me.
367
00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:45,790
It's just a little reminder
about the number for the builder.
368
00:19:45,840 --> 00:19:47,080
But no rush. It's cool.
369
00:20:02,520 --> 00:20:04,710
You're not supposed to feed them bread.
370
00:20:04,760 --> 00:20:07,920
Let them have a sodding
pastry! Live a little.
371
00:20:08,960 --> 00:20:10,000
Liz!
372
00:20:11,600 --> 00:20:12,790
Ow! What you doing?!
373
00:20:12,840 --> 00:20:15,230
Do the pictures on the
packs mean nothing to you?
374
00:20:15,280 --> 00:20:17,950
You smell like... kissing an ashtray!
375
00:20:18,000 --> 00:20:20,830
Just leave me alone.
I've got nothing to do.
376
00:20:20,880 --> 00:20:22,430
Got nothing to do?
377
00:20:22,480 --> 00:20:23,870
How can you have nothing to do?
378
00:20:23,920 --> 00:20:25,710
How dare you have nothing to do?!
379
00:20:25,760 --> 00:20:27,670
I'd love to have nothing to do,
380
00:20:27,720 --> 00:20:30,950
but I've got to work,
cook, clean the house,
381
00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:33,550
hang out the laundry, bake the soda bread,
382
00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:35,670
make myself look nice for Jill!
383
00:20:35,720 --> 00:20:37,470
Not that she bloody notices.
384
00:20:37,520 --> 00:20:39,390
Why you baking your own
bread, you bell-end?
385
00:20:39,440 --> 00:20:40,710
I've got to get back to work.
386
00:20:40,760 --> 00:20:42,710
I was up till 3am the last two nights
387
00:20:42,760 --> 00:20:44,910
drawing all the portraits
for the tea towels,
388
00:20:44,960 --> 00:20:46,630
and then I flipping left them at home.
389
00:20:46,680 --> 00:20:49,270
I had to cycle back to the house
in my lunch hour to get them!
390
00:20:49,320 --> 00:20:51,350
You didn't have to offer to help.
391
00:20:51,400 --> 00:20:52,910
Yeah.
392
00:20:52,960 --> 00:20:55,150
And you didn't have to NOT offer to help.
393
00:20:55,200 --> 00:20:56,590
What?
394
00:20:56,640 --> 00:20:58,470
Do you know what, Liz? I
can't talk about this.
395
00:20:58,520 --> 00:21:01,320
I can't listen to someone
moaning about having free time.
396
00:21:02,480 --> 00:21:04,150
Just...
397
00:21:04,200 --> 00:21:06,280
Just bloody grow up.
398
00:21:08,240 --> 00:21:09,920
I miss my kids, Kev.
399
00:21:13,640 --> 00:21:14,960
I really miss 'em.
400
00:21:16,760 --> 00:21:18,470
And I don't want to be that person.
401
00:21:18,520 --> 00:21:20,560
That's Anne. That's lame.
402
00:21:21,680 --> 00:21:23,590
I don't get it. I've been
counting down the hours
403
00:21:23,640 --> 00:21:24,830
till both my kids are in school
404
00:21:24,880 --> 00:21:27,430
and you know what I did with
my first day as a free woman?
405
00:21:27,480 --> 00:21:31,110
I sat on the sofa and I stared
at a black spot on the ceiling
406
00:21:31,160 --> 00:21:33,720
where Max fired his
Nerf gun and left a mark.
407
00:21:42,920 --> 00:21:44,630
Sorry.
408
00:21:44,680 --> 00:21:46,120
Yeah, I'm sorry, too.
409
00:21:49,600 --> 00:21:51,500
Let's have a look at your drawings, then.
410
00:21:52,520 --> 00:21:54,440
OK, quickly.
411
00:22:03,080 --> 00:22:04,870
These are too good, Kev.
412
00:22:04,920 --> 00:22:06,070
Thank you, Liz.
413
00:22:06,120 --> 00:22:09,200
No, I mean, they're... they're
shit, but they're not shit enough.
414
00:22:11,360 --> 00:22:13,280
Go to work, I'll sort this out.
415
00:22:14,320 --> 00:22:15,830
Thanks, Liz.
416
00:22:15,880 --> 00:22:17,670
Nick, hey, where are you?
417
00:22:17,720 --> 00:22:19,270
Oh, you're still at the house?
418
00:22:19,320 --> 00:22:22,350
I've spoken to Wojciech. He
says it's difficult to tell
419
00:22:22,400 --> 00:22:24,470
without getting up there
and having a look,
420
00:22:24,520 --> 00:22:26,390
but it's probably a mortar issue.
421
00:22:26,440 --> 00:22:29,630
So, er... they can either
repoint it or reline it.
422
00:22:29,680 --> 00:22:31,910
OK. Well, can you get me
a quote for both of them
423
00:22:31,960 --> 00:22:33,670
and then I can have a look at it?
424
00:22:33,720 --> 00:22:36,510
Why don't you e-mail him directly?
I've really got to get to...
425
00:22:36,560 --> 00:22:38,590
Sorry, Nick, while you're
there, would you mind
426
00:22:38,640 --> 00:22:40,910
just popping the bins
inside the gate, just, um...
427
00:22:40,960 --> 00:22:43,950
so the burglars don't think
we're out, or whatever?
428
00:22:44,000 --> 00:22:46,830
Thank you so much. Thank
you so, so, so, so much.
429
00:22:46,880 --> 00:22:48,480
Thank you. Bye-bye.
430
00:23:31,760 --> 00:23:34,390
Rose, don't put all the biscotti
jars out at once, please.
431
00:23:34,440 --> 00:23:36,760
One will do. We're not TK Maxx.
432
00:23:38,160 --> 00:23:41,440
Oh, my God! Ah! Life-saver!
433
00:23:42,480 --> 00:23:44,110
Julio can squeeze me in at two today.
434
00:23:44,160 --> 00:23:46,510
Oh, that's perfect!
Johnny's coming over tonight.
435
00:23:46,560 --> 00:23:48,950
- Is that your boyfriend?
- Er... Well, husb...
436
00:23:49,000 --> 00:23:51,470
It's complicated, but we're
still seriously tight.
437
00:23:51,520 --> 00:23:54,910
Um... OK, er... the car
machine guy's coming to fix
438
00:23:54,960 --> 00:23:57,950
um... the, um... the thingy at
five. You OK to stay till then?
439
00:23:58,000 --> 00:24:00,190
I can't. I actually have
to leave on the dot tonight.
440
00:24:00,240 --> 00:24:01,910
I'm volunteering at the food bank, so...
441
00:24:01,960 --> 00:24:03,550
What? No, I don't think you understand.
442
00:24:03,600 --> 00:24:05,030
Julio literally never has a cancellation
443
00:24:05,080 --> 00:24:07,830
and I really need to get
this nightmare sorted.
444
00:24:07,880 --> 00:24:12,230
- I don't know what you're pointing at.
- My roots. Look at them.
445
00:24:12,280 --> 00:24:14,230
I'd love to help, but I've got...
446
00:24:14,280 --> 00:24:16,390
I can't believe this is happening!
447
00:24:16,440 --> 00:24:19,070
- It's just your hair.
- It's just my hair? Oh, my God!
448
00:24:19,120 --> 00:24:21,790
You literally have no idea what
it takes to maintain this, do you?
449
00:24:21,840 --> 00:24:24,550
- Course not. You are 26.
- I'm 23. - I'm talking now.
450
00:24:24,600 --> 00:24:26,070
I have to work out five days a week,
451
00:24:26,120 --> 00:24:27,670
I have to get my roots done bimonthly,
452
00:24:27,720 --> 00:24:30,310
I have to get these bleached,
these waxed, these extended.
453
00:24:30,360 --> 00:24:32,670
I am a fulltime project to myself, Rose,
454
00:24:32,720 --> 00:24:36,030
so just because I seem
like I'm a cool boss
455
00:24:36,080 --> 00:24:38,590
and I've got an easy-going vibe
456
00:24:38,640 --> 00:24:40,240
doesn't mean you can let me down.
457
00:24:42,280 --> 00:24:44,110
You should cut yourself some slack.
458
00:24:44,160 --> 00:24:46,830
You're stressing yourself
out over nothing.
459
00:24:46,880 --> 00:24:48,310
I think you look great, Amanda.
460
00:24:48,360 --> 00:24:51,920
You've got a killer bod and
your skin's, like, amazing!
461
00:24:54,160 --> 00:24:55,600
Yeah.
462
00:24:57,760 --> 00:25:00,230
Yeah, you're right.
463
00:25:00,280 --> 00:25:02,440
I hope I look half as
good as you when I'm old.
464
00:25:06,160 --> 00:25:09,550
Er... er... My colleague is
joining me in a minute, sorry.
465
00:25:09,600 --> 00:25:11,080
Just leave it!
466
00:25:26,480 --> 00:25:28,230
100 portrait tea towels.
467
00:25:28,280 --> 00:25:29,830
Oh, thank you so much for this, Liz.
468
00:25:29,880 --> 00:25:32,750
No problem. The printers was
around the corner, anyway.
469
00:25:32,800 --> 00:25:34,360
Aw! And this is for you.
470
00:25:35,840 --> 00:25:37,270
You made me a cake?!
471
00:25:37,320 --> 00:25:39,670
I use my time to save your time
472
00:25:39,720 --> 00:25:41,910
and use that time to bake a bloody cake.
473
00:25:41,960 --> 00:25:43,390
There's no helping some people.
474
00:25:43,440 --> 00:25:45,430
These look great!
475
00:25:45,480 --> 00:25:47,750
Why's one of them Holly Willoughby?
476
00:25:47,800 --> 00:25:49,750
Something for the dads.
477
00:25:49,800 --> 00:25:51,710
Thank you. Thank you so much.
478
00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:53,870
My pleasure. I almost enjoyed doing it.
479
00:25:53,920 --> 00:25:56,470
Oh, well, we'll be gearing up for
the class Christmas card soon,
480
00:25:56,520 --> 00:25:58,550
- if you want to get in on that.
- Oh, you're all right.
481
00:25:58,600 --> 00:26:00,390
I just thought it might
help keep you busy.
482
00:26:00,440 --> 00:26:03,190
Fuck that, Kev. I've had an epiphany!
483
00:26:03,240 --> 00:26:06,110
The kids are gone, every day until 3:30!
484
00:26:06,160 --> 00:26:07,600
I'm a free woman!
485
00:26:16,120 --> 00:26:17,390
Everything OK?
486
00:26:17,440 --> 00:26:18,710
No, everything's not OK.
487
00:26:18,760 --> 00:26:20,470
- Sorry, what?
- Where were you?
488
00:26:20,520 --> 00:26:22,670
- In the park.
- In the park.
489
00:26:22,720 --> 00:26:24,990
What the hell were you doing in the park?
490
00:26:25,040 --> 00:26:27,590
I was having a picnic with
my husband, if you must know.
491
00:26:27,640 --> 00:26:29,150
Having a picnic?
492
00:26:29,200 --> 00:26:30,510
At least have the guts to lie,
493
00:26:30,560 --> 00:26:33,510
say you were at the osteopath
or a funeral or something.
494
00:26:33,560 --> 00:26:35,750
- I'm sorry, I...
- Nick, in case you hadn't noticed,
495
00:26:35,800 --> 00:26:37,550
we have got two businesses to run here.
496
00:26:37,600 --> 00:26:40,910
Listen, hon, I'm always
happy to help anyone, but...
497
00:26:40,960 --> 00:26:43,950
.. like my husband says, you're
really starting to take the piss.
498
00:26:44,000 --> 00:26:46,590
I'm taking the piss? How?
How am I taking the piss?
499
00:26:46,640 --> 00:26:48,030
How? How am I taking the piss?
500
00:26:48,080 --> 00:26:49,550
You are the one that's taking the piss.
501
00:26:49,600 --> 00:26:51,830
You're the one that's turning up
here four hours late for work.
502
00:26:51,880 --> 00:26:53,990
Why? Because you're lolling
around on a picnic blanket,
503
00:26:54,040 --> 00:26:56,150
shoving mini Scotch eggs down your throat.
504
00:26:56,200 --> 00:26:57,790
Yeah, because I'm self-employed.
505
00:26:57,840 --> 00:26:59,790
I can do what I want.
506
00:26:59,840 --> 00:27:02,550
What's the point in having
all the stress and insecurity
507
00:27:02,600 --> 00:27:05,030
of self-employment if you
can't bunk off for a picnic
508
00:27:05,080 --> 00:27:06,550
on a sunny afternoon?
509
00:27:06,600 --> 00:27:09,430
I could literally go for a swim
at the men's pond right now,
510
00:27:09,480 --> 00:27:11,550
if I wanted.
511
00:27:11,600 --> 00:27:13,950
In fact, you know what, hon?
512
00:27:14,000 --> 00:27:15,600
I am going for a swim.
513
00:27:22,240 --> 00:27:23,520
Unbelievable.
514
00:27:29,760 --> 00:27:33,230
Guys! Daddy's here! I'll just be a sec!
515
00:27:33,280 --> 00:27:35,270
Hello, sweetie. Hello.
516
00:27:35,320 --> 00:27:38,670
- Coat's all done? Say goodbye to
Mum. - Bye! - Bye, Mummy! Love you!
517
00:27:38,720 --> 00:27:40,160
See you, Amanda.
518
00:28:14,000 --> 00:28:16,320
Oh, hey. Yo, yo!
519
00:28:20,160 --> 00:28:22,350
You look like Elton John.
520
00:28:22,400 --> 00:28:23,630
Do you want a cocktail?
521
00:28:23,680 --> 00:28:25,080
Oh, yeah. Lovely.
522
00:28:28,320 --> 00:28:29,520
Load up.
523
00:28:37,360 --> 00:28:41,070
Hey, mate. You don't fancy, um...
524
00:28:41,120 --> 00:28:42,960
.. an unpaid job as my PA, do you?
525
00:28:44,320 --> 00:28:45,920
No, you're all right.
40859
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