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1
00:00:03,100 --> 00:00:06,200
Oh. my dad's here. my dad's here.
He's just parking his rental car.
2
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:09,600
Got a spot on 78th.
Very impressive.
3
00:00:09,500 --> 00:00:13,500
Look at him. He's such a cute
little parallel parker.
4
00:00:13,300 --> 00:00:16,100
Oh. there's the door.
Oh. he's getting out of the car.
5
00:00:16,000 --> 00:00:20,000
Oh. he Asian.
Okay. that's not my dad.
6
00:00:21,100 --> 00:00:24,600
Look at you.
Mr. Happy Boots.
7
00:00:24,400 --> 00:00:27,400
I wish I got this excited
when my dad came to visit me.
8
00:00:27,300 --> 00:00:30,100
- Come on. your dad's great.
- Yeah. in a parallel universe
9
00:00:30,000 --> 00:00:34,000
where my hair is straight
and so are you.
10
00:00:35,300 --> 00:00:38,600
How about that time you got into
Columbia and he threw you a big party?
11
00:00:38,400 --> 00:00:40,800
That was your dad.
12
00:00:40,700 --> 00:00:44,100
When I told my dad I got into Columbia.
he said. "Yeah. well we're broke.
13
00:00:44,000 --> 00:00:48,000
Now move.
you're blocking 'Baretta'."
14
00:00:48,700 --> 00:00:51,900
Ah. fathers. Yeah.
15
00:00:51,700 --> 00:00:55,600
Mine withheld affection
from me for 30 years.
16
00:00:55,800 --> 00:00:58,100
Then I find out
he's not really my father
17
00:00:58,000 --> 00:01:02,000
and my whole life
has been a big lie.
18
00:01:02,900 --> 00:01:06,900
I'm sorry did I bring
everybody down?
19
00:01:07,700 --> 00:01:10,200
Jack. I don't know
what to say. except--
20
00:01:10,000 --> 00:01:13,600
- ( knocks )
- My dad's here. yeah!
21
00:01:13,500 --> 00:01:16,700
- Will.
- Pop!
22
00:01:16,600 --> 00:01:18,700
- Hey--
- Give me that coat. come on.
23
00:01:18,600 --> 00:01:20,800
- Look at you. you look great.
- Thank you.
24
00:01:20,700 --> 00:01:23,000
- That my sweater?
- No. Grandma sent this to me
25
00:01:22,900 --> 00:01:24,900
- Iast Christmas.
- She took it from me.
26
00:01:24,800 --> 00:01:27,700
The woman's gettin' old. Will.
I'm tellin' you. she's gettin' old.
27
00:01:27,600 --> 00:01:31,600
- Hello. beautiful.
- Hello. George.
28
00:01:35,900 --> 00:01:38,000
Hey. you workin' out?
29
00:01:37,900 --> 00:01:39,900
Oh. you know.
when I can fit it in.
30
00:01:39,900 --> 00:01:43,900
Twice a day.
six days a week.
31
00:01:43,700 --> 00:01:46,200
And who looks more like
Rita Hayworth every day. huh?
32
00:01:46,100 --> 00:01:50,100
Oh. George.
you're gonna spoil me.
33
00:01:50,200 --> 00:01:52,800
- The other Rita Hayworth.
- Will: Come here.
34
00:01:52,700 --> 00:01:56,300
- Oh. my father is so bad.
- Good to see you. sweetheart.
35
00:01:56,200 --> 00:01:59,900
I'm never giving my father another
Father's Day present ever again. Ever.
36
00:01:59,700 --> 00:02:03,600
Grace. don't Bogart the dad. huh?
37
00:02:04,600 --> 00:02:07,200
- You want something to eat?
- No. no. don't bother.
38
00:02:07,100 --> 00:02:10,100
I'm not hungry. Unless you got.
maybe... Iike a sandwich.
39
00:02:10,000 --> 00:02:12,300
- Make that two.
- Yeah. you know. don't bother.
40
00:02:12,200 --> 00:02:15,000
- I'll nibble.
- I'll still have mine.
41
00:02:14,800 --> 00:02:18,800
Sure. Jack. how about a...
fat chance on rye?
42
00:02:20,000 --> 00:02:22,200
Oh. I almost forgot.
Here.
43
00:02:22,100 --> 00:02:24,800
- Oh. Dad--
- It's nothing. it's a little something.
44
00:02:24,700 --> 00:02:26,300
- Absolutely nothing.
- Ah!
45
00:02:26,200 --> 00:02:28,700
- I saw it. it seemed like you.
- Oh...
46
00:02:28,600 --> 00:02:31,700
Only smaller
and flatter and fuzzier.
47
00:02:31,600 --> 00:02:34,200
I love it. thank you.
48
00:02:34,100 --> 00:02:38,100
The only thing my dad ever gave me
was feet the size of canoes.
49
00:02:40,400 --> 00:02:42,400
Hey. don't get too attached to that.
50
00:02:42,400 --> 00:02:46,400
I have a coat of yours
that would go perfect with it.
51
00:02:46,200 --> 00:02:48,900
- Well. I must away.
- Got a hot date. Jackie?
52
00:02:48,800 --> 00:02:52,800
No. but the guy
who's dating me does.
53
00:02:52,900 --> 00:02:55,400
See. I keep telling you.
Iearn from this man.
54
00:02:55,300 --> 00:02:57,400
Follow him around.
Do what he does.
55
00:02:57,300 --> 00:02:59,400
Yeah. I'm sure you'd be
very happy to see me
56
00:02:59,300 --> 00:03:03,000
dancing on a box
in a sequined tube top.
57
00:03:02,900 --> 00:03:05,000
George.
if you ever get tired of him.
58
00:03:04,900 --> 00:03:08,000
you'll be exactly like me.
59
00:03:07,800 --> 00:03:10,200
Chow mein.
60
00:03:10,100 --> 00:03:12,500
So. George. why are you in town?
61
00:03:12,400 --> 00:03:15,400
Well. the company's giving me
an award for. uh...
62
00:03:15,300 --> 00:03:17,700
I don't know.
workin' there and not dyin'.
63
00:03:17,600 --> 00:03:19,800
An award? You said it was just
a business dinner.
64
00:03:19,700 --> 00:03:21,800
- I wanna come.
- No. no. no. don't come.
65
00:03:21,700 --> 00:03:23,800
nobody's coming.
Your brothers are busy.
66
00:03:23,800 --> 00:03:26,000
Mom's taking care of Grandma.
nobody's coming.
67
00:03:25,900 --> 00:03:27,500
- Are the Burtons coming?
- Yeah.
68
00:03:27,400 --> 00:03:28,900
- B.J. and Chuck?
- Yeah.
69
00:03:28,800 --> 00:03:31,900
- Buzz and Rita and Sherman--
- Yeah. yeah. yeah. nobody's coming.
70
00:03:31,800 --> 00:03:33,700
Well. I wanna come.
71
00:03:33,600 --> 00:03:36,000
Don't be silly. it's already
becoming a thing.
72
00:03:35,900 --> 00:03:38,200
and I don't want it to blow up
into a situation.
73
00:03:38,100 --> 00:03:42,100
Now. if you'll excuse me.
I gotta go to the john.
74
00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:44,200
See that?
It's classic George Truman.
75
00:03:44,100 --> 00:03:46,500
He says he doesn't want me to come.
but what he means is.
76
00:03:46,400 --> 00:03:49,000
"I want you to come.
I just don't want to put you out."
77
00:03:48,900 --> 00:03:52,000
Well. my father's never
invited me anywhere.
78
00:03:51,800 --> 00:03:55,800
Except the time he had
that lower G.I. series.
79
00:03:56,400 --> 00:03:59,500
Don't think Norman Rockwell's
gonna be paintin' that one.
80
00:03:59,400 --> 00:04:01,100
No. no.
81
00:04:01,000 --> 00:04:03,000
Hey--
82
00:04:03,000 --> 00:04:05,200
we should go. you know.
and surprise him.
83
00:04:05,100 --> 00:04:07,600
Yes. yes.
84
00:04:07,500 --> 00:04:09,900
We can go and we can hide
under the table.
85
00:04:09,800 --> 00:04:13,800
and when they say his name.
we can jump up and go. "Surprise!"
86
00:04:14,200 --> 00:04:17,200
Yeah. and then Harpo and Zeppo
could bring in the dean's wife
87
00:04:17,000 --> 00:04:19,500
and we'll all sail to Freedonia.
88
00:04:19,400 --> 00:04:23,400
Hey. don't knock it. It was very funny
when we did it in my dad's G.I. series.
89
00:04:24,300 --> 00:04:28,300
( theme music playing )
90
00:04:37,400 --> 00:04:39,200
Hi. poodle.
91
00:04:39,100 --> 00:04:43,000
- Who's your daddy?
- You are.
92
00:04:44,200 --> 00:04:45,800
Who's my daddy?
93
00:04:45,700 --> 00:04:48,000
Oh. that's right. some
stranger in a Nixon mask
94
00:04:47,900 --> 00:04:51,900
who boinked my mother
at a pool party in '68.
95
00:04:52,200 --> 00:04:55,400
God. that is awful.
96
00:04:55,300 --> 00:04:59,300
Who in the world
would have a pool party?
97
00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:04,100
I don't know. it's just
seeing Will with his dad.
98
00:05:03,900 --> 00:05:07,500
It feels like there's something
missing in my life. you know?
99
00:05:07,400 --> 00:05:11,200
Like my soul is on empty.
100
00:05:11,000 --> 00:05:14,900
You can go a lot of years
on empty. honey. Trust me.
101
00:05:14,700 --> 00:05:18,700
Come on.
Charge yourself a little happy.
102
00:05:19,400 --> 00:05:23,400
No. Karen. Buying something's
not gonna make me feel any better.
103
00:05:23,600 --> 00:05:27,600
Although the new Prada slip-on
wouldn't make me feel any worse.
104
00:05:28,000 --> 00:05:29,500
Hey. Jack.
How you doin'?
105
00:05:29,400 --> 00:05:31,900
Sad. Ionely. fatherless.
106
00:05:31,800 --> 00:05:35,800
Seconds away from recording
a Country album.
107
00:05:46,400 --> 00:05:48,600
Karen. why are you laughing?
108
00:05:48,500 --> 00:05:50,300
- He's in pain.
- Oh, I know.
109
00:05:50,200 --> 00:05:52,100
He's miserable.
He doesn't know
110
00:05:52,000 --> 00:05:55,800
who his real father is.
it's terrible.
111
00:05:55,700 --> 00:05:59,100
Oh. oh. oh. wait a minute.
I get the joke.
112
00:05:58,900 --> 00:06:01,600
Jack's all alone in the world.
113
00:06:01,500 --> 00:06:03,300
Funny.
114
00:06:03,200 --> 00:06:06,000
No. no. honey.
you don't understand.
115
00:06:05,900 --> 00:06:08,200
I found him.
116
00:06:08,100 --> 00:06:11,300
- I found Jack's daddy. I did.
- What?
117
00:06:11,200 --> 00:06:14,400
Yeah. I had Private Detective
do a little snooping around.
118
00:06:14,300 --> 00:06:16,400
He was getting bored
following Stan
119
00:06:16,300 --> 00:06:20,200
back and forth
to Krispy Kreme anyway. so...
120
00:06:20,300 --> 00:06:22,200
- And it paid off.
- Wait a minute.
121
00:06:22,100 --> 00:06:24,400
you found Jack's father?
Why didn't you tell him?
122
00:06:24,300 --> 00:06:27,500
Well. honey.
I'm working on a set-up here.
123
00:06:27,400 --> 00:06:30,600
Tonight. Jack is gonna meet
his real daddy.
124
00:06:30,500 --> 00:06:33,000
Again.
why didn't you tell him?
125
00:06:32,900 --> 00:06:35,200
I know this may be
an alien concept to you.
126
00:06:35,100 --> 00:06:39,100
but it might have made
another person happy.
127
00:06:39,800 --> 00:06:43,800
Lord. you are just as simple
as that blouse you're wearing.
128
00:06:48,400 --> 00:06:51,200
I am trying to create
a moment here.
129
00:06:51,100 --> 00:06:53,800
- Right. So tell him that--
- I'm still talking.
130
00:06:53,700 --> 00:06:55,900
- All I'm saying is--
- Quit interrupting me.
131
00:06:55,800 --> 00:06:57,500
- Don't yell at me.
- I'm not yelling.
132
00:06:57,400 --> 00:07:01,400
( yells )
Yes you are!
133
00:07:07,900 --> 00:07:11,900
God. honey. I was just trying
to tell you a little story.
134
00:07:33,900 --> 00:07:36,900
Go.
135
00:07:36,800 --> 00:07:39,200
Right now.
they're both in the dark.
136
00:07:39,100 --> 00:07:42,000
However. I am going to call them both
and have them meet tonight
137
00:07:41,900 --> 00:07:44,400
at Jack's favorite coffee shop--
very mysterious.
138
00:07:44,300 --> 00:07:46,500
very.
"Who am I meeting?" okay?
139
00:07:46,400 --> 00:07:49,300
And then. I am going to arrive
to make the big announcement.
140
00:07:49,200 --> 00:07:52,200
"Jack. there's
a daddy in this room.
141
00:07:52,000 --> 00:07:55,000
And I'm not talking Puff."
Okay?
142
00:07:54,900 --> 00:07:58,900
It's so hip.
143
00:07:58,900 --> 00:08:01,800
Oh. so basically you made me
feel like an idiot
144
00:08:01,700 --> 00:08:04,800
because you're making
a father-son reunion all about you.
145
00:08:04,700 --> 00:08:08,200
Honey. I think maybe
it's those pink go-go boots
146
00:08:08,000 --> 00:08:12,000
that are making you
feel like an idiot.
147
00:08:17,500 --> 00:08:19,400
Your father's gonna be
so surprised.
148
00:08:19,400 --> 00:08:20,900
I know.
149
00:08:20,800 --> 00:08:24,800
- You look great.
- Thanks. Where is he?
150
00:08:26,400 --> 00:08:29,200
- Um. Will?
- Huh?
151
00:08:29,100 --> 00:08:32,000
You jumped into a tux.
popped a Tic Tac in your mouth.
152
00:08:31,900 --> 00:08:35,000
took all of five seconds.
This took all afternoon.
153
00:08:34,900 --> 00:08:37,000
It was like building a boat.
154
00:08:36,900 --> 00:08:38,700
I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
you look great.
155
00:08:38,600 --> 00:08:41,500
and if I had a bottle of champagne.
I'd smash it over your head.
156
00:08:41,400 --> 00:08:44,300
That is so sweet.
157
00:08:44,200 --> 00:08:46,200
Oh God.
what are you doing here?
158
00:08:46,100 --> 00:08:47,700
Hi. surprise!
We're here.
159
00:08:47,600 --> 00:08:50,400
I know. I got that. Grace.
But I told you not to come.
160
00:08:50,300 --> 00:08:52,700
I know. it's your big night.
We should be here.
161
00:08:52,600 --> 00:08:55,000
You shouldn't be here.
Go do something fun.
162
00:08:54,900 --> 00:08:58,300
Go put on a sequined tube top.
Dance on a box.
163
00:08:58,200 --> 00:09:01,900
Dad. we're staying.
And why are you acting so weird?
164
00:09:01,700 --> 00:09:05,100
- It's like you're hiding something.
- Of course I'm not hiding anything.
165
00:09:05,000 --> 00:09:07,900
- It's just a little complicated.
- Will. Ted Farmer.
166
00:09:07,800 --> 00:09:11,800
- Oh. hi.
- This must be your lovely wife. Grace.
167
00:09:12,400 --> 00:09:16,400
It's not that complicated.
168
00:09:21,900 --> 00:09:24,900
Please. I beg you. can we not
get into this right now?
169
00:09:24,800 --> 00:09:27,100
- You haven't--
- How are you? Good to see you.
170
00:09:27,000 --> 00:09:29,300
- You haven't told them I'm gay?
- Do you walk around
171
00:09:29,200 --> 00:09:32,100
- telling your colleagues I'm straight?
- I think it's implied.
172
00:09:32,000 --> 00:09:33,900
- I begged you not to come.
- But. Dad--
173
00:09:33,800 --> 00:09:35,200
Okay. okay. guys.
come on.
174
00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:37,900
I'm sure this is nothing
that can't be solved by--
175
00:09:37,800 --> 00:09:40,900
me leaving.
176
00:09:40,700 --> 00:09:43,100
- I can't believe this is happening.
- Shh shh shh.
177
00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:45,100
- Don't make a scene.
- I don't make scenes.
178
00:09:45,000 --> 00:09:46,800
Mom makes scenes.
I don't make scenes.
179
00:09:46,800 --> 00:09:50,000
Oh my God. I'm two highballs
and a tight dress away from being Mom.
180
00:09:49,800 --> 00:09:53,200
- You gotta understand something--
- I don't have to understand anything.
181
00:09:53,100 --> 00:09:56,400
- I told you--
- Hey. Mr. Truman. Mr. Truman.
182
00:09:56,300 --> 00:09:59,100
Will. you must be
so proud of your father.
183
00:09:58,900 --> 00:10:02,200
Oh. well proud doesn't begin
to describe what I'm feeling.
184
00:10:02,100 --> 00:10:05,500
- So. could we borrow him for a minute?
- Please. be my guest.
185
00:10:05,400 --> 00:10:09,100
- I gotta--
- Yeah.
186
00:10:08,900 --> 00:10:12,900
Here. I got you this. You probably just
want to get out of here. right?
187
00:10:12,800 --> 00:10:15,000
No. no. no.
We're not going anywhere.
188
00:10:14,900 --> 00:10:18,700
Oh. you saw the rack of lamb?
189
00:10:18,600 --> 00:10:21,100
No. binge-o.
190
00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:23,400
I want to talk to my father.
191
00:10:23,300 --> 00:10:26,700
- Really? Here?
- We are gonna deal with this tonight.
192
00:10:26,500 --> 00:10:28,600
Wow.
193
00:10:28,600 --> 00:10:32,600
Okay.
So until then we're married.
194
00:10:32,800 --> 00:10:36,800
I guess that explains why you haven't
touched me in 15 years.
195
00:10:47,500 --> 00:10:50,300
Hi. are you John Marshall?
196
00:10:50,200 --> 00:10:53,800
- Yeah. are you Jack McFarland?
- Last time I checked.
197
00:10:53,700 --> 00:10:57,700
- Well. nice to meet you.
- Yes. it's nice to meet you as well.
198
00:11:01,500 --> 00:11:03,700
Any idea why we're here?
199
00:11:03,600 --> 00:11:06,300
I got a call from this woman.
Karen Walker.
200
00:11:06,200 --> 00:11:09,100
and she said to be here at 8:00
'cause I was gonna meet someone
201
00:11:09,000 --> 00:11:13,000
- who would change my life.
- Wow. I got the same phone call.
202
00:11:14,900 --> 00:11:18,900
And I have a feeling she's right.
203
00:11:22,100 --> 00:11:24,000
We have three kids.
204
00:11:24,000 --> 00:11:28,000
Hannah. Rachael and Liam.
205
00:11:29,700 --> 00:11:32,100
Hannah played Queen Ester
in the Purim play.
206
00:11:32,000 --> 00:11:35,200
Woman: Ohh.
207
00:11:35,100 --> 00:11:39,100
- Not a dry eye in shul.
- Okay.
208
00:11:39,400 --> 00:11:42,500
- Sweetie. Iet's dance.
- I don't feel like dancing.
209
00:11:42,400 --> 00:11:45,500
- They're playing our song.
- Oh. they have a song.
210
00:11:45,300 --> 00:11:48,100
You two are so sweet together.
211
00:11:48,000 --> 00:11:52,000
- What's your secret?
- I'm gay.
212
00:11:53,300 --> 00:11:57,300
That's what our son says.
He's funny too.
213
00:12:02,400 --> 00:12:04,000
What are you doing?
214
00:12:03,900 --> 00:12:06,100
Waiting for you
to talk to your father.
215
00:12:06,000 --> 00:12:09,300
And by the way. Dave in accounting
has been giving me the eye all night.
216
00:12:09,200 --> 00:12:13,100
I'm not above
cheating on you.
217
00:12:12,900 --> 00:12:14,900
Will. come on.
218
00:12:14,900 --> 00:12:17,500
Everyone has that moment
when they realize
219
00:12:17,300 --> 00:12:19,900
that their parents
are less than perfect.
220
00:12:19,800 --> 00:12:21,800
And I hate to break it to you.
221
00:12:21,800 --> 00:12:24,800
- but this is yours.
- Look. I know my father. okay?
222
00:12:24,600 --> 00:12:27,800
And trust me. he wouldn't do this
unless he had a very good reason.
223
00:12:27,700 --> 00:12:29,900
- Which is?
- I don't know.
224
00:12:29,800 --> 00:12:32,800
But I intend to find out.
225
00:12:32,700 --> 00:12:36,700
And we are not
raising the kids Jewish.
226
00:12:40,300 --> 00:12:43,100
It's steady work.
but you know. I wouldn't be adverse
227
00:12:43,000 --> 00:12:45,300
to a change if the right
opportunity came along.
228
00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:49,100
Yeah. interesting. interesting.
You got good arms. John. You work out?
229
00:12:49,000 --> 00:12:53,000
Yeah. I try to. Like I always say.
nobody likes a fatty.
230
00:12:53,400 --> 00:12:57,400
Oh my God. oh my God.
only my personal mantra.
231
00:12:59,600 --> 00:13:01,600
Do you live alone?
232
00:13:01,500 --> 00:13:04,500
Yeah. uh... Iook. can you
excuse me for a minute.
233
00:13:04,400 --> 00:13:08,300
- I got a quick phone call.
- Okay. sure. I'll be right here. Okay.
234
00:13:08,100 --> 00:13:12,000
Hurry back though.
you don't want me to get cold.
235
00:13:12,900 --> 00:13:14,800
Oh. oh. honey.
236
00:13:14,800 --> 00:13:16,900
honey. I'm so sorry I'm late.
237
00:13:16,800 --> 00:13:18,800
- Is John here?
- Yes.
238
00:13:18,700 --> 00:13:22,400
We met. we talked.
he's fabulous.
239
00:13:22,200 --> 00:13:24,200
Thank you so much. Karen.
I love him.
240
00:13:24,200 --> 00:13:28,100
Oh. Jack. It warms my heart
to hear you say that.
241
00:13:27,900 --> 00:13:31,900
Or maybe it's the gin rickey
I just had in the limo.
242
00:13:33,400 --> 00:13:36,100
Even on Skid Row I'm funny.
243
00:13:35,900 --> 00:13:39,900
I have a really good feeling
about this. Karen.
244
00:13:40,200 --> 00:13:42,600
He's playing it cool. but um...
245
00:13:42,500 --> 00:13:46,400
I think I might be
gettin' some tonight.
246
00:13:46,700 --> 00:13:50,700
What the hell are you talking about?
That man is your daddy.
247
00:13:51,300 --> 00:13:55,300
Not yet.
248
00:13:57,800 --> 00:14:01,800
No. I mean he's your father.
249
00:14:02,700 --> 00:14:04,700
What?
250
00:14:04,600 --> 00:14:08,600
Yes. I had Private Detective
talk to your mom
251
00:14:08,600 --> 00:14:10,800
and he tracked down
the guy in the Nixon mask.
252
00:14:10,700 --> 00:14:12,800
John Marshall is your father.
253
00:14:12,700 --> 00:14:15,000
Oh my God. you found my dad!
Oh my God. I hit on my dad.
254
00:14:15,000 --> 00:14:16,300
- Ew!
- Ew!
255
00:14:16,200 --> 00:14:18,000
- Ew! Ew!
- Ew! Ew!
256
00:14:17,900 --> 00:14:21,200
I need soap.
I need a Handi Wipe for my brain.
257
00:14:21,100 --> 00:14:22,500
Ughh!
258
00:14:22,400 --> 00:14:26,400
Oh. I hit on my father.
I'm Soon-Yi.
259
00:14:30,600 --> 00:14:34,000
So. Jack. why don't we go someplace
where we can be alone?
260
00:14:33,800 --> 00:14:34,900
- Ew!
- Ew!
261
00:14:34,900 --> 00:14:37,300
- Ew! Ew!
- Ew! Ew!
262
00:14:37,200 --> 00:14:39,500
No. you don't understand.
You're my daddy.
263
00:14:39,400 --> 00:14:40,600
Not yet.
264
00:14:40,500 --> 00:14:44,500
- Ew! Ew!
- Ew! Ew!
265
00:14:49,400 --> 00:14:53,000
No. In 1968 you went
to a pool party.
266
00:14:52,800 --> 00:14:55,300
you had a Nixon mask on.
you had sex with my mother.
267
00:14:55,200 --> 00:14:57,400
Wait a minute. 1968--
268
00:14:57,300 --> 00:15:00,900
if we're talking about the same party.
there we a lot of guys in Nixon masks.
269
00:15:00,800 --> 00:15:04,800
Well. Dick was big that year.
270
00:15:05,600 --> 00:15:08,000
And anyway. I'm gay.
271
00:15:07,900 --> 00:15:10,800
Me too.
That must be where I get it.
272
00:15:10,600 --> 00:15:14,600
No. No. I mean I can't be your father
because I don't have sex with women.
273
00:15:15,900 --> 00:15:17,400
- Are you sure?
- Yeah.
274
00:15:17,300 --> 00:15:20,000
- Not even once?
- Could you?
275
00:15:19,900 --> 00:15:23,900
- Ew! Ew!
- Ew! Ew!
276
00:15:25,600 --> 00:15:28,600
Thank you for coming.
277
00:15:28,500 --> 00:15:31,500
Well. you know. since we. um...
cleared the air.
278
00:15:31,300 --> 00:15:33,600
- want to get a drink at Boy Bar?
- I'll get us a cab.
279
00:15:33,500 --> 00:15:35,400
Wait a minute.
wait a minute!
280
00:15:35,400 --> 00:15:39,400
Don't you find this
just a little bit eepy-cray?
281
00:15:40,400 --> 00:15:43,700
She is kinda right.
It is weird. John. You know--
282
00:15:43,600 --> 00:15:47,600
- I have tickets to the Backstreet Boys.
- I'll call you later. Karen.
283
00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:56,400
This damn thing--
I-- I'm supposed to go on in a minute.
284
00:15:56,300 --> 00:15:59,900
So. four people have asked me
where the newlyweds are registered.
285
00:15:59,700 --> 00:16:03,700
I told them
"International Male."
286
00:16:04,100 --> 00:16:07,800
I have a feeling we're going to be
getting a lot of mesh thongs.
287
00:16:07,700 --> 00:16:11,300
Will. I'm sorry. it's just--
288
00:16:11,100 --> 00:16:12,100
( groans )
289
00:16:12,100 --> 00:16:14,700
What happened?
Was it a misunderstanding
290
00:16:14,600 --> 00:16:16,600
- that got out of control?
- No.
291
00:16:16,500 --> 00:16:19,500
Is it that you like Grace so much
you wish we were married?
292
00:16:19,400 --> 00:16:20,900
God. no!
I mean--
293
00:16:20,800 --> 00:16:23,000
I-- I like her and all that.
but no.
294
00:16:22,900 --> 00:16:25,700
Then tell me. because I know
that you would never do something
295
00:16:25,600 --> 00:16:27,800
Iike this unless you had
a very good reason.
296
00:16:27,700 --> 00:16:29,700
What do you want me
to tell you?
297
00:16:29,600 --> 00:16:32,000
You want me to tell you
that this company is run
298
00:16:31,900 --> 00:16:35,300
by a homophobic right-wing maniac?
ls that what you want to know?
299
00:16:35,200 --> 00:16:37,300
I mean. here I am
coming up on my pension.
300
00:16:37,200 --> 00:16:40,400
your grandmother insists on living
year after year after year.
301
00:16:40,300 --> 00:16:43,300
and that's not cheap.
302
00:16:43,100 --> 00:16:47,100
If I lose this job. who's gonna
hire a guy my age. Will? Who?
303
00:16:48,400 --> 00:16:50,200
Dad. I had no idea.
304
00:16:50,100 --> 00:16:52,800
Is that-- is that really true?
305
00:16:52,700 --> 00:16:55,100
God. I wish it was.
306
00:16:55,000 --> 00:16:57,900
Yeah. me too.
What is this?
307
00:16:57,800 --> 00:16:59,700
Look. it-- it's not me. Will.
308
00:16:59,600 --> 00:17:02,100
There's a lot of small-minded
people out there.
309
00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:04,700
I just can't stand the thought
of somebody judging you.
310
00:17:04,600 --> 00:17:08,600
- People making judgments
- All right. Dad. Dad. stop. I got it.
311
00:17:09,300 --> 00:17:11,900
It's the Captain Lenny thing
all over again.
312
00:17:11,800 --> 00:17:13,800
What?
313
00:17:13,700 --> 00:17:15,500
You don't remember
Captain Lenny?
314
00:17:15,400 --> 00:17:17,900
He used to introduce
the cartoons on Channel 4.
315
00:17:17,800 --> 00:17:20,300
I was 10, you took me
on that business trip to New York
316
00:17:20,200 --> 00:17:23,100
and there in the hotel bar
was Captain Lenny.
317
00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:26,500
drinking a beer
and hitting on a waitress.
318
00:17:26,400 --> 00:17:28,500
I was very upset
and you said to me.
319
00:17:28,400 --> 00:17:31,500
"Willy. he's not really a captain.
320
00:17:31,300 --> 00:17:35,100
He's just a guy."
321
00:17:35,000 --> 00:17:39,000
Oh. you're killing me here. man.
322
00:17:39,600 --> 00:17:43,600
You're my dad.
I love you.
323
00:17:43,400 --> 00:17:47,000
You did what you thought
you needed to do.
324
00:17:46,900 --> 00:17:49,500
You're just a guy.
325
00:17:49,400 --> 00:17:53,400
George. you're on.
326
00:18:05,200 --> 00:18:08,000
Finally.
327
00:18:07,900 --> 00:18:11,500
What?
328
00:18:11,300 --> 00:18:15,300
What? Don't look at me like that.
The girls take too long.
329
00:18:15,600 --> 00:18:19,600
Aren't you gonna
wash your hands?
330
00:18:22,000 --> 00:18:26,000
So here he is. George Truman.
331
00:18:29,400 --> 00:18:31,800
- You okay?
- Yeah. I guess.
332
00:18:31,700 --> 00:18:34,800
Thank you. wow.
333
00:18:34,700 --> 00:18:36,800
Lifetime achievement award.
334
00:18:36,700 --> 00:18:40,700
That's really an honor.
335
00:18:41,200 --> 00:18:45,200
My son's gay.
336
00:18:47,600 --> 00:18:49,500
Will. where are you?
337
00:18:49,500 --> 00:18:52,500
- He's here!
- Grace.
338
00:18:52,300 --> 00:18:54,800
Hi. son.
339
00:18:54,700 --> 00:18:57,900
I-- I-- I told you all that. uh...
340
00:18:57,800 --> 00:19:01,400
I told you all that Will and Grace
were married
341
00:19:01,200 --> 00:19:03,600
and... they're not.
342
00:19:03,600 --> 00:19:06,800
Will is... Will is gay.
343
00:19:06,600 --> 00:19:10,600
He's a proud gay man.
344
00:19:11,400 --> 00:19:13,000
And I'm...
345
00:19:12,900 --> 00:19:15,500
a proud father.
346
00:19:15,400 --> 00:19:17,600
Of a proud gay man.
347
00:19:17,500 --> 00:19:21,500
- (applause )
- Thank God that's over.
348
00:19:21,700 --> 00:19:23,400
No. no. no.
I got a lot more to say.
349
00:19:23,300 --> 00:19:25,100
Oh my God.
350
00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:27,900
He comes into the living room.
Iooks us both right in the eye.
351
00:19:27,800 --> 00:19:30,500
and he says.
"Mom. Dad. I'm gay.
352
00:19:30,400 --> 00:19:33,200
And I want to bring
my boyfriend home for Christmas."
353
00:19:33,100 --> 00:19:37,100
And I said. "You couldn't give me
just a necktie. Iike any other father?"
354
00:19:39,100 --> 00:19:41,400
God. even when he's bad.
he's good.
355
00:19:41,300 --> 00:19:44,300
And then. you know--
ah. no. I'm not even going to tell you
356
00:19:44,200 --> 00:19:48,200
about the time he did "Ben Hur"
as a musical in the living room.
357
00:19:48,400 --> 00:19:52,400
Changed the title to "Ben Him."
358
00:19:53,300 --> 00:19:56,000
Will-- Will. stand up.
359
00:19:55,900 --> 00:19:57,800
Yeah. yeah. stand up. Hey--
360
00:19:57,700 --> 00:20:00,000
I want everyone to see you.
Come on. stand up.
361
00:19:59,900 --> 00:20:03,900
Come on. Will.
Come on.
362
00:20:03,800 --> 00:20:05,600
Will. you're--
363
00:20:05,600 --> 00:20:08,900
you're here...
364
00:20:08,700 --> 00:20:12,600
you're queer...
365
00:20:13,700 --> 00:20:17,700
and l-- I love you. dear.
366
00:20:17,700 --> 00:20:21,700
I love my gay son. everybody.
367
00:20:22,100 --> 00:20:25,600
Thank you.
Thanks. Pop.
368
00:20:25,400 --> 00:20:29,400
- The wife is always the last to know.
- Oh. stop.
369
00:20:33,500 --> 00:20:37,500
( theme music playing )
0
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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