All language subtitles for SCORPION - S03 E09 - Mother Load (720p - Web-DL)

Brave warriors,
today begins our quest

to save our home!

All: The warlock's chest. Yes.

Our beloved sanctuary has
been marked for demolition.

So, brandish your clipboards,

unsheathe your pens

and collect the signatures
i need to make it

onto the west altadenia
alderman's ballot.

Seriously, guys, get going.

It's Thanksgiving.

I said that I would help

set the table, so please.

What the hell is this?

Cabe. Oh, cabe!

You've come to help me get
signatures for my campaign.

No, I'm here to help Paige get
some potatoes for the dinner,

which you better not miss
because you're playing

dress-up with your chums.

Cripes, man, how old are you?

I am dyfrost the wise
and I've seen 50 winters.

Go away.

Kid, nerds dressed up in
their mother's bathrobes,

harassing the electorate,
isn't how you win an election.

Uh, well...

Dressing up gets
people's attention.

It was kaldor's idea,
my, uh, campaign manager.

Statistically, there's more
foot traffic on Thanksgiving.

It's the perfect way to...

Piss people off.

They got to feed
20 relatives today;

they don't want to be bothered
by a bunch of freaky wizards.

So, you come back
on a Sunday morning,

when folks are relaxed,
then you'll get your signatures.

That's actually a good idea.

But what about him?

People are lining up for him.

He's not even set up yet.

He's giving away
free cranberry sauce.

Oh, great, 99 cents a can.

200 bucks and he gets every

signature he needs.

Is that Toby?

What the heck, man?!

You're fraternizing
with the enemy!

Paige makes that
homemade cranberry sauce.

I swung by here to pick
up some of the good stuff.

It's a good thing I
ran into that guy, huh?

He's the competition.

Oh, well, relax.
I used a fake name.

Signature's not valid.

Mr. Curtis.

Excuse me,
you left your license.

I'm sorry, man.
They asked for ID.

It was free sauce.

You must be my competition.

I'm Dr. Sanjay patel.

Sylvester dodd. Doctor?

Oh, what's your specialty?

I have a phd in geology.

Funny how they throw

the term doctor
around, isn't it?

Sanjay,

we're running out of cans.

We need to restock.

Everyone,

this is my campaign manager,

Allie Jones.

Allie, our esteemed opponent.

Mr. dodd, a pleasure.

I'd love to introduce myself

to your campaign
manager if he's around.

(Shouting)

He's not here.

Uh... I'm-I'm running in.

I could,
I could grab some cranberry sauce

for you so you won't

lose your, uh, your post there.

My name is Gabe, cabe.

Cabe, cabe gallo.

Scottish cabe.

Italian gallo.

A little Gaelic and garlic.

Fun.

And I do

appreciate the help;
I'll be right over there.

It's great to meet all of you.

Sanjay,
we should really get back.

Toby: Look at him.

Flush, red around the ears.

I'd say Turkey
isn't the only bird

cabe's got his eye on today.

And my Harvard-trained
preceptors tell me that

she was flirting with you.

Shouldn't slap
another man's sauce.

Where's cabe?

I sent him to buy some potatoes,

not grow them.

Happy, can you help me

with the pies?

Happy?

Oh.

What the heck is that?

I asked you to pick
me up a carving knife,

not something from mad Max.

I know, but I was thinking
about the engineering

of electric knives
and how they're

underutilized, so I made this.

Check it out.

It toasts the bread
while it cuts.

We call it the toasty-slicey.

The slicey-toasty.

Guys, all I want is a
traditional family dinner.

Turkey, stuffing, pumpkin pie,

so please, no more genius-y
stuff, not today.

(Walter clears his throat)

My electrolyte elixir worked.

Oh, god, help me.

Smells good in here.

Well, I really hope you...

Like stuffing 'cause that's
all I've made so far.

Well, I've made strides
that prove that my new drink

substantially enhances
athletic endeavors.

You drank that sludge?

Fastest Turkey
trot I've ever run.

No muscle cramping,
no dehydration,

and it is all thanks
to Wally's invention.

And timbo's peak performance.

(Chuckles) (Phone rings)

Excuse me, got to get this.

Walter: Yes. Wally and timbo?
Seriously?

Yeah, you wanted us to get
along, we're getting along.

Glad you're friends,
just got to tell you,

it's a little...
weird. (Chuckles)

You'd rather us be enemies? No.

It's just...
Walter's not one to, uh, make friends

with humans, so...
guess you must be a pretty special human.

Mm. Walter: Great. See you then.

Great news.
We just picked up a job.

For when?

Now. Let's gear up.

No! I've been planning this meal

for a week, and I need help,

and there's no way
we're taking off

for the south seas
or the Ukraine.

This is Thanksgiving and we're
gonna have a happy, family meal,

damn it.

(Sighs)

It's not the Ukraine.

It's El Segundo.

And it's a quick
structural inspection.

Some real estate investor,

named Veronica Franklin,
needs to have permit paperwork

to the city by Monday
morning, but everyone's gone

because of the holiday weekend.

Nice. Desperation prices.

Exactly.
Top dollar for a few hours' work

and we desperately need

to refill our slush fund.

No, we don't.

Slush fund's fine.

Actually, it's been financing
my recent inventions,

like genius water.

You can't call it that.
There's already smart water.

That's a good point.
We should brainstorm.

No! No brainstorming.

I can't believe you guys are
gonna mess up Thanksgiving.

Do you know how hard it is
not to screw up a Turkey?

Just pop that fowl in the oven.

We'll be back in a few hours.

The client is at
the end of her rope.

She saw an article
about scorpion,

read that we employed
a genius engineer.

Guilty as charged.

You always say that scorpion
is about helping people.

Now, you get her to sign
the paperwork while we work,

and we'll be done
before you know it.

(Car horn honks)

Oh, hey, there's the others.

Ralph,
help sly unload the groceries

and I'll get the
contracts together.

And, Walter,

if my Turkey is
not cooked in time,

your goose will be.

Joint's falling apart.

What is it?

Cabe: It's an old philochrome
film manufacturing plant,

been empty for decades.

Guys...
(Indistinct conversation)

You hear something?

Yeah, actually I do.

It sounds like...

Cantonese.

(Laughing): Oh, yeah.

Yeah, it's a business deal.

They're negotiating.
You know cantonese?

Well, how do you expect
me to watch lectures

by Chinese physicists?

(Speaking cantonese)

Walter: Ms. Franklin?

Yeah, I'm Walter o'brien.

We-we spoke on the phone.

Hello.

Thank you for coming.

Walter: Certainly, Ms. Franklin.

Uh, tell me how we can help you.

What the hell are
you doing here?

You okay, kid?

Paige, just hear me out.

How does Ms.
Franklin know your name?

Her last name is not Franklin.

It's dineen.

She's my mother.

Not good?

I know this is a lot to process,

but I really need your help

and you're the only
person i could turn to.

I don't want anything
to do with you

or whatever you're trying
to get us involved in.

Yeah, what are we involved in?

An uncomfortable
family squabble.

Well, it's about the building.

I assume it's not

the structural issue that
you mentioned on the phone.

That's correct.

What a shock;

mom playing fast and
loose with the truth.

I had to be sure
that you would come.

You see, I've been following
scorpion in the news.

What?

I can't be interested
in my daughter's life?

Since when?

(Sighs) And I knew that scorpion

was the type of business

that could help me.

How do we help you exactly?

See, uh,

over there?

We found this very old

piece of machinery

and it was covered
in warning stickers:

"Danger." "Hazardous materials."

And I just didn't
know what to do.

Okay, well, I can check it out, Ms.
dineen, yeah.

Thank you, Walter. Thank you.
Walter: Sure. N-no.

No, we're not helping her.

Walter.

We don't entertain her lies.

You guys, we can't believe

anything she says.

Veronica: Yes, you can. You see,

I represent Swiss bankers
who are buying this property.

Now, I hired a few
day laborers to relay

a little bit of the foundation

there, but vibrations
from the jackhammer

forced this fake
wall to fall down

and-and underneath it there
was a-an old elevator shaft

with the machinery in it.

And I figured only a team
of geniuses could help me.

Well, you figured wrong.

Walter: Happy, you got to check

this out. Come, hurry!

No, I just said
we're not helping.

How is that not clear?!

Uh, uh, pal? Uh, you are, uh...

How do I put this?

You're letting the weight
of your emotional baggage

crash your Paige plane.

You see,
you control how you react

to this unforeseen development.

Toby, I swear I will stuff
my foot in your business

like you're a
Thanksgiving Turkey.

And our session is complete.

Guys,
I am the manager of this team,

and we are not taking this
case, period.

We're taking this case.

Are you kidding me?! Why?

Because the machine in the
back is a nuclear reactor.

(Under breath): Oh,
I'm never finishing that Turkey.

♪ ♪

Seems like a nobelium
neutron activator.

Probably loaded
with three pounds

of enriched uranium plates.

Like the californium

neutron flux multiplier

that Kodak put in the bottom

of their Rochester,
New York facility in '74,

except theirs wasn't
capable of nuclear fission.

Well, this one is.

Why would

philochrome have a reactor?

To run power-hungry
equipment that checks

for the impurities in film,

neutron radiography testing,

plenty of other applications.

This is the stuff of legends.

Decades ago,

a handful of private
companies built their own

mini-reactors and they hid them.

Can't believe we
actually found one.

Okay,
but how is it still running

in an abandoned building?

Right here.

Illegally spliced

into the power grid.
When the company

went belly up, everyone boogied
and left this thing here.

(Wood and metal
groans, then crashes)

Happy: Whoa.

What in the hell was that?

All the jackhammering
weakened the foundation

around the support beams.

Whole basement's unstable.

Piece of ceiling or column could
fall and hit on the reactor.

But the reactor's
encased, right?

So...
Well, the cooling system isn't.

Look at, you see these pipes?

When this system was built,

they used a liquid
metal process made

of sodium and potassium.

It doesn't corrode
the pipes inside

like water-based systems, but...

Always a but.

They soon realized that
sodium and potassium

react explosively
when exposed to water,

even with trace amounts
of water in the air.

So,
if there's a collapse in here

and it breaks one
of those pipes...

The cooling system goes boom.

On top of a nuclear reactor.

In the middle of Los Angeles.

Mushroom cloud city.

Millions of people at risk.

Cabe: I'll make the
necessary calls.

(Veronica sighs)

Thank goodness i
called for help.

You're seriously taking credit

when you're the one
who made this mess?

I certainly did not.

I didn't let this
building rot to the point

where it's dangerous, I didn't

put liquid metal in those pipes.

And I surely

didn't build an illegal reactor.

No, you just walked
back into my life

after a decade,

more than happy to
blow it up again,

figuratively and literally.

Paige... What are you

doing in this building, mom?

'Cause we all know
you're up to something,

as usual! Paige...

You're upset,
we'll talk about this later.

I have nothing to say to you,

except go back to
where you came from.

And the bell ends the round.

We are gonna step outside,

take some breaths and calm down.

Keep her away from me.

So...

Thanksgiving plans?

This is ridiculous.
I am gonna go

talk to her right now.

I don't think
that's a good idea.

I'm sorry, and you are?

Tim Armstrong, I'm...

Dating your daughter.
It's nice to meet you.

Well, Tim, I'm glad you
know what my daughter needs,

after dating her

for how long? A few months.

Oh, okay, well,

I gave birth to
her when I was 17.

I saw her through
everything from tonsillitis

to tap dancing,
so I appreciate your concern

for her well-being,
but I know what's best for her,

and what's best is for she
and i to talk this out.

I agree and you should, just...

Not right now.

Cabe: Thanks for nothing!

(Phone beeps) What?

State nuclear facility says

their closest inspectors
are two hours away.

They're rushing 'em to L.A. now.

We could have an
explosion by then.

Understood,
but we're dealing with

a government bureaucracy

on a four-day holiday weekend.

Most of the people
i need to talk to

traveled yesterday to
be with their families.

Cabe, did you try homeland?
Yeah,

I did, and homeland said,

with a problem like this,

they'd call scorpion.

They did offer

logistical help if we need it.

So we need a
lead-lined facility,

simple underground structure
so nothing could fall

on it, ideally on bedrock

to protect the
pipes from breaking

in unforeseen seismic activity.

Then what we do is
we just keep it there

until the nuclear commission

can properly dismantle it.

Ralph and I are
searching for something

matching those specs now!

But if we remove the reactor
from its power source,

the cooling system shuts off...

Nuclear meltdown.

That's why we need a truck.

We secure the
reactor in the back,

I'll rig the truck's battery
to the cooling system.

That'll give us
about 31 minutes to

get the nuke to
wherever it's going.

I have a rented truck outside

for the equipment.

A-a truck for a few jackhammers?

It was all they had, so...

Everything she's involved
with is suspicious.

You keep saying that...
That she's a liar,

she's duplicitous,
she's sneaky...

But unless you tell me

why you feel that
way, i can't help you.

Okay, you want to hear it? Fine.

What was your hourly
private practice rate?

Well, it was $400 an hour.

Problem was,
racetrack made $500.

Well, here's 20 bucks.

You're retained.

Patient-doctor confidentiality.

You cannot tell
anyone on the team.

Legally I can't,

but i-i wouldn't anyway
if you had just asked.

That being said,
I'm keeping the $20.

My mother is a con woman,

a first-degree grifter.
Growing up,

she was in everything
from pyramid schemes

that ripped off pta moms

to selling time-shares
that she didn't own.

How did that affect
your relationship?

Relationship?

What relationship?

She was always doing time...

Six months here,
eight months there.

I told my friends that
she was a saleswoman

who traveled the world

making custom perfumes
for celebrities.

And my dad worshipped her,

and when he finally moved out,

he took me with
him because he knew

being around her was
unhealthy for a child.

He was right.
And every once in a while,

she would...
She would show up and...

And bring me a gift

and I wouldn't open it because
i knew how she paid for it.

With money that belonged to
someone who had been swindled.

(Voice breaking):
And my father died...

My father...

Died heartbroken because of
the woman that you met today.

Whatever.
I-I've made my peace with it.

Paige, you have not
made your peace with it.

You have built-up anger
and that's harmful.

You need to talk to your
mother in a constructive way,

let her know how
she's made you feel.

No, if it were easy
talking to Veronica dineen,

I would have had it out
with her a long time ago.

For years i have
searched my soul

for any love i have
left for her and...

I've found nothing.

(Computer beeps)
I found something!

What do you have?

In the 1950s

solarsun pictures built
an underground film vault

in palos verdes to preserve
their film library.

Been empty since
everything went digital.

Walter, according to this site,

the vault is lead-lined
and airtight!

And it's on bedrock.

So, for safety's sake,
we shouldn't drive

over 25 miles per hour

with the reactor in the
truck, but palos verdes

is only 11 miles away,

so we get there well before
the truck's battery can

no longer keep the cooling
system operational.

I got a question.

This thing weighs
several hundred pounds.

How are we gonna get it

out of here and into a truck

without banging
it around so much

that we all get toasted?

Happy: We got to figure out a
way to get this up the shaft,

to the first floor
and out the door.

It's only ten feet.

Yeah, well,
it might as well be a hundred.

Not necessarily.

Happy, get the car
Jack from cabe's truck.

Roger that.

Now, everyone,
look for something that we can

put under the reactor.

(Grunting)

Hey!

This thing is full
of film canisters!

Would these work?

Found some trade binders!

We can put the Jack on these!

Great, bring them over!

Move out of the way!

(Jack cranking)

Okay, cabe, Tim,

stack the canisters
under the pallet.

Power cables are pulled tight.

I'll have to disconnect
'em from the grid.

Once I do that,
the cooling system goes down

and the reactor
starts heating up.

Walter, how much time
do we have to connect it

to the truck battery
before meltdown?

Well, if I'm right about
the uranium contents,

I'd say 19 minutes.

That's not a lot of time.

(Grunts) Well,
there's never enough time.

Here, start unhooking it.

Um, while they're doing that,

may I talk to you for a moment?

Uh, yeah,
but it'll have to be quick 'cause

they're nearly done.
Okay, understood. Just...

You know, um,

I know today has been volatile.

But it was never my intention to
turn your company upside down.

Oh, no, it's okay.

Uh, emotional
situations are always...

Often dysfunctional.

Oh, well,
everything between Paige and I

has been dysfunctional
for some time now.

I was terrified for a while...

You know, how she'd turn out...

She was rudderless,

single mom,
dropped out of school.

So, when I saw her name

mentioned in articles
i read about scorpion,

uh... (Chuckles)

I was relieved.

She seems to have found a home,

and I'm appreciative of that
more than you could ever know.

So thank you.

Well, we appreciate Paige.

She's very, uh...

She brings intangibles.

You seem to really care for her.

As a... as a valued member of the
team, of course.

Yeah, she's t-top notch.

So, um, okay.

Oh, no, we... Oh, can I just...

Thank you for listening
and being so kind.

I mean, between Paige and Tim,

I haven't received
a very warm welcome.

Oh, well, Tim is...

(Chuckles) An acquired taste.

Uh, i-i didn't much like him
when he first came to scorpion.

Oh, he's not one of
the original geniuses?

Oh, no. He's not a genius.

Then why is he on the team?

Well, he's a homeland trainee.

Oh.

Paige: I mean, you have no idea

how manipulative she is!

One conversation and she has you

doubting yourself!
This is not worth $20.

(Phone ringing)

Oh, thank god.

Hello.

Doc, you, Paige and Veronica
need to take her truck

and pick up packing materials
to cushion the reactor

during the drive.

Veronica's on her way up.

I'm not going anywhere with her!
Why is she even still here?

'Cause we need the manpower
to load up the truck,

and there isn't much time!

I'm about to disconnect
the power cables,

so we'll have less than
20 minutes until meltdown.

Well, I feel like I'm
about to have a meltdown.

About to?

(Powering down)

Okay, here we go.

(Cranking)

Keep it steady!

Thank you for the
obvious advice.

Canisters! Okay!

(Cabe grunts)

Binders!

Oh, I got it!

(Cabe grunting)

(Creaking)

Almost to the first floor.

Cabe, get up there and
pull that sucker out!

On my way!

So, Veronica,
which field of real estate are you in?

Development, finance.

Fraudulent transactions.

Not helpful.

And, uh, you work out of L.A.
mostly?

Actually,
I live just outside of scottsdale.

A lovely gated community.

But I hate talking about myself.

(Chuckling) I'd like to

catch up with my daughter,

but since she won't
speak with me,

maybe you could fill
me in on her life.

I'd love to hear
about her boyfriend,

Tim?

(Whispers): I will kill you.

Doctor? I think he's a Virgo.

No, no, no. No, no.
We are not going to sit here

and discuss my life
in front of someone

who has not been a
part of that life.

I'm making an effort,

Paige. 20 years too late!

I am uncomfortable.

Okay, what is your real agenda?
Why-why are you in L.A.?

Why did you call my
company into this thing?

One, I don't have an agenda.

Two, I'm in L.A. on business.

And three, i needed help

and wanted to
reconnect with you.

I don't believe
anything you say.

Now pull in here.

En garde!

Toby: Oh, see this is why
i didn't do family therapy.

Oh, great.

Hardware store is closed
'cause of Thanksgiving.

What are we gonna do now?
Walter says

we need materials to
cushion the reactor.

I have an idea.

Support Sanjay
patel for alderman?

I'm a Sylvester dodd woman.

She's having a rough day.

Good job, happy!
It's almost level with the floor.

Okay,
should be just about there.

Cabe: Hey, it's started
swaying, you guys!

Oh, crap.

The canisters are falling!

Okay, I'll restack the binders!
Happy,

get the Jack in
place for support!

Come on.

(Grunting)

Uh, big problem!

Jack broke!

Get out from under there
before that thing crushes you!

If this thing falls,
the pipes break,

liquid metal exposed.
And then mushroom cloud.

(Grunting)

All right!

We are not gonna be able to
hold this thing very long.

Cabe: We gotta figure out a way
to get this weight off them!

Uh, give me a second!

I hope your back's
feeling strong,

cabe, I got a plan.

I'm gonna jam this
sucker under those bars

on top of the reactor.

Don't hit the coolant pipes!

No duh!
Push down hard on the seesaw.

(Creaking)

Yeah, it's not all
the way to the top.

Happy: I can see.

Cabe, lie on the bar.

What?

Just lie on the damn bar!

(Straining)

Hyah!

We got it.

(À la Ricky
Ricardo): Sweetheart,

you have some 'splaining to do.

Careful. Careful with that.

You get the packing material?
Hardware store was closed.

We had to improvise.

Toilet paper and marshmallows.
Yeah, that'll work.

So, happy,
we have six and a half minutes

to get the reactor hooked
up to the truck's battery.

Okay, get that beast to the
back, and I'll have it ready

in less than five.

Done!

With 91 seconds to spare.

This is what you
do for a living?

This'll keep the reactor
cool for 31 minutes.

That's more than enough time

to get to the film
storage bunkers.

So, happy,
we need to stay in the back

and monitor the
temperature and mechanics.

If the pipes break,
the cooling system fails,

and then mushroom cloud.

Tim, cabe,
hold the reactor steady.

If they bounce too
much, mushroom cloud.

And then, Paige, Toby,
drive cautiously.

One wrong pothole...

Mushroom cloud, got it.
All right, hurry!

Where are you going?

I'm coming. I feel responsible.

No, you're just faking guilt

because god knows what you
want to get out of this.

So do what you do best,

walk away while i
clean up your mess.

Be reasonable.

I can help and still
make my 3:00 appointment.

It's a win-win.

Read my lips,
you're not getting in this truck.

Paige, you drive stick?

I told you to let me teach you.

She's a mother trucker.

Great driving, Veronica.
Slow and steady,

no faster than 25 miles per hour

and we should get there safe.

Guys, I'm looking at
the city grid online.

There is zero traffic due
to the holiday weekend.

Got clear skies, smooth sailing.

Our cases rarely go this well.

What's that?

A weirdo in a cape
dropped it off.

Kaldor?

Don't know,
I wouldn't let him in.

He was wearing a cape.

"Don't be a clod,
vote for dodd."

You know,
I asked him to get me t-shirts.

Capes are a bad idea.

(Truck rattling) No...

Veronica: What's this?

Toby: Sly, you're route's blocked
by the Thanksgiving day parade.

Sylvester (Over
radio): Impossible.

I know the route perfectly.

They're premiering the
super fun guy balloon.

I'm recording it and everything.

Well, there are
barricades in front of us

that say you sent
us the wrong way.

Well, they must have changed
their route last minute

and forgot to
update the web site.

Well,
it's just a police barricade.

I can go around it.

Wouldn't be the first time.

They can't drive
through a parade route.

Why not? If this thing
blows up on top of the float

or ten blocks away,
either way the parade's over.

We can get LAPD to
try to clear it,

but you cancel it,
you're gonna get thousands

of spectators simultaneously
leaving the area.

Total gridlock.

We'll never make it to
palos verdes in time.

Cabe: Sly, find another road.

All side streets heading
south are blocked,

east and west of you.

Okay, then,
we'll take hawthorne.

It goes all the way around.
Too much added time.

The truck's battery will die,

and with it,
most of Los Angeles.

Hey, we're right next
to the muni golf course.

No cars, no barricades...
we can drive right through the city.

According to its web site,

it's closed for the
holiday weekend.

There shouldn't be
anybody on the course.

No, it's too dangerous.
We need smooth roads,

not hills, bumps, and divots.

Boss, I've got this
nuke box hooked up

to a 12.6-volt
direct-current battery.

It's already
starting to heat up,

and the marshmallows are melting...
we need a plan.

I got it.

We can go over unpaved roads.

We just need to use
these moving straps.

But they're not flexible.
They have no give.

That's why I'm gonna
build shock absorbers.

Out of what? Us.

Toby: We're down to 24 minutes

and counting...
how's it going back there?

Sylvester (On
radio): Almost done.

Can I help? Something tells me

a nuclear reactor is a
less-volatile situation

than the one up here.
Can it, Toby.

I kid. Not really.

Speaking of kids,
how is my grandson?

He's delightful.
None of your business.

I-i mean,
it's none of your business.

I can't wait to meet him.

What could possibly
make you think

I would ever let you see my son?

Because you're a kind
and decent person,

and wouldn't deny a boy
his own grandmother.

Watch me.

Mushroom cloud would be
nice right about now.

Hey, Veronica, when I say
so, hit the Greens.

Guys, lift on three.

One, two, three!

(All groaning, straining)

Walter: Okay, good.
Got it. Drive.

Sylvester: I can imagine that's heavy.
You only have eight minutes,

and then you'll clear the course

and you'll be on your way.

Just hold on.

All we're doing is holding on.

Get the rig going faster.

No, no, no.
Not faster on soft ground, okay?

We can't risk the volatility.

You want volatility?
Keep letting your side sag.

Man up and lift.

(Thump)

What the hell was that?

What? (Banging)

Oh, balls.

What do you mean, "oh, balls"?

I mean we're getting
pelted by golf balls!

What? The site said
the course was closed.

The course, not the range.

(Golf balls thumping) Aah! Geez!

Those jerks are aiming at us.

I would, too,
if I saw a truck on my driving range.

(Pelting continues) Toby:
Uh, happy,

would it be bad if one
of the wire connectors

you rigged were
broken by a golf ball?

Mushroom-cloud bad.

That's what I thought.

Should I drive faster?

Walter: No! It's too dangerous.

What is their problem?
It's human nature.

We got balls, clubs,
a moving target,

and frat boys home on
Thanksgiving break.

This is what they do.

Damn it, I guess I'm doing this.
Doing what?

Becoming a human piñata.

I'm gonna protect
the connector box.

(Shrieking)

Aah! Try to break it now, jerks!

Ow!

Aah! Ow!

(Toby grunting)

Man, they're really nailing him.

Kind of wish I could see that.

Just a few more yards, Toby.

Aah! Ow!

We're off the course now.
You can put the reactor down.

Okay, cabe, carefully.

Gentle.

You okay?

Uh, never worse.

Great.
Uh, well, that shortcut worked.

We'll get to the
film vault on time.

Yeah, but I'm gonna miss
my 3:00 appointment.

You're worried about one
of your crooked meetings

when there's five million
lives on the line?

It's with people who don't
like to be kept waiting.

(Gunshots) Whoa! What the hell?!

We're being shot at?

They found me.

I don't know how,
but they found me.

Aah! If a bullet cracks the cooling
pipe, it's over.

Okay,
who the hell are these guys?!

Not waiting around to find out.

Veronica, screw the
25-mile-an-hour limit, floor it!

(Gunfire)

Aah!

Oh, let me guess.
The people shooting at us

are your 3:00.

Good guess. (Gunshots continue)

(Gunfire)

Sly, you gotta help us out, man.

We got bullets
raining down on us.

Okay, we are strategizing
an escape plan now.

Ralph, you're a gamer,
what do you see?

Hang a left on beach cove.
I have an idea.

Toby: Quick, turn left.

(Gunfire continues)

What are these guys after?

They think we're carrying money.

They're Swiss bankers.
It's a real estate deal.

What Swiss bankers
shoot at people?

O-okay, they're not Swiss,

but they do have
Swiss bank accounts.

Congratulations,
your lying is gonna get us killed.

(Gunshots)

(Tires screech) Walter: Aah!

Veronica,
you will be approaching

train tracks very soon...
Drive over them.

Ralph, progress report.

I'm almost into the
city's train system.

The tracks are gonna jostle
this thing hard, hold on!

(Gunshots continue)

We're in.

(Railroad crossing
bell clanging)

Whoa!

(Bell clanging)

(Tires screeching)

Oh, yeah!

Nice job, sly, you nailed 'em!

What the hell, mom?!

I had no idea that
they would resort

to this kind of violence.

Who? These...

You know what, don't tell me.
You're just gonna lie anyway.

We're gonna get the
reactor to the film vault,

happy's gonna splice its
cooling system into the grid,

and you can walk home.

I am so done with you!

(Alarm sounding)

What now?

Oh, boy.

Uh, there's a GPS kill
switch on the engine.

A GPS what switch?

We've got no battery to
keep our hot box cool.

We're on a countdown
to meltdown.

I'll try and override.

Wait, when you rented this
truck, what did you do?

I said I had a rented truck.

I never said i rented a truck.

Someone with a credit
card ending in 3939

rented it, technically.

Great, the credit card
company picked up the fraud,

and the rental place used the
GPS to shut down the truck.

Thanks, mom.
If millions of people die,

it'll be your fault.

How could I know
about GPS switches?

I've been in prison
for six years.

Prison? Prison?

Prison? Grandma's a jailbird.

That's your gated
community in Arizona?

Arizona state
penitentiary for women.

It has lots of gates.

Guys, I didn't plan for this

to turn out this way.
You know those...

Those men who were
shooting at us?

I did business with
them a while ago.

I owe them some money,

and when I got out,
i wanted to settle up.

We were supposed to meet

at the factory,
and then I found this

nuclear thing and
things got sidetracked.

I didn't know how
dangerous they were.

They probably went
to the building early

to make sure you weren't
playing any games.

They saw you leave with
us, followed.

Probably thought their
money was on the truck.

Waited until we got far enough
away from the driving range,

no one could see
us, opened fire.

Paige: Congratulations.

You've graduated to
hanging out with killers.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry

that things spiraled
out like this.

I'm... sorry I put you and
your friends in danger.

I'm... sorry about today
and every other day

prior to this day.

You don't have a baby and
think that you're gonna end up

a lousy parent.

It's not the plan.

It just happens.

It doesn't just happen.

You allow it to happen.

And I would never allow
that to happen to my child.

I know.

Because you're a better
mother than I could ever be.

I've made a million mistakes,

but I've never
stopped loving you.

And no matter what
you say to me,

no matter how much you hate
me, I never will.

Happy: Okay, no go.

They make these switches
complicated for a reason.

We don't have the
tools or the time

for me to get the battery

running again. Bottom line?

Bottom line?

We've got about nine
minutes until meltdown.

Walt, you got to figure a
way to cool this reactor

without a battery. Okay, sly,

what's our current
distance from the ocean?

Less than three miles.

Walter: Okay.

Uh, I know what you're thinking,

but even if we could
get it to the ocean,

liquid metal can't have contact

with water or it'll explode.

And the coolant
pipes are so brittle,

they'll crack in the cold ocean.

So, then we ditch the coolant.
Tim: How?

You said even the
moisture in the air

could cause it to detonate.

Sodium metal can
be stored in oil.

If you drain the
coolant directly

into oil,
without exposing it to oxygen,

you can safely remove it
before sinking the reactor.

All right,
where do we get that much oil?

Holy cow.

When we were driving away

from the shooters,
we drove so far out of the way

that we circled back
around to the parade route.

So what?

Look. It's churros!

On behalf of the unites
states government,

I'm commandeering your churro
cart and all its cooking oil.

(Groans)

Walter: Happy,
make sure there's a vacuum seal.

Happy: That's the plan.

Tim: Ready.

Walter: Hit it, happy.

Sylvester: How's it looking?

Happy: Flowing,
but we got to drain the whole system.

And, with no coolant,
this thing is red hot.

We've got less than...
Eight minutes

until another chernobyl.

Toby: You guys have
been to chernobyl.

If I remember correctly,

no one wants to go back there.

Uh, Walter, how do we get this

to the ocean in time?

Super fun guy.

Cabe.
(Crowd cheering and applauding)

Cabe: Excuse me.

On behalf of the United
States government,

I'm commandeering this
super fun guy balloon!

Walter: Helium tank is set.

Isn't this just gonna cause
an environmental disaster

in the ocean?

No, not at all.

Every seven centimeters
the reactor drops,

the radioactivity of
the waste falls by half.

You could be swimming
ten feet away from it

and get no exposure.

It'll be safe until the
department of energy

can pick it up over
the next 24 hours.

Can you give me your cell phone?

Yeah.

I'm gonna put it inside
so they can track

our location exactly.

(Quietly): Hey, Veronica.

Can I talk to you?

That phone's not
Bluetooth compatible.

So, you pretended you
were talking cantonese

when we came into that
basement, didn't you?

I was just trying to
impress my daughter.

And the... rental truck
for just a few jackhammers?

How much did those
shooters think you had

that you needed a truck?

You're gonna keep me on my
toes, aren't you?

Walter: Sly.

Give me the numbers?
We are in luck.

Wind speed is ten miles
per hour due west.

You need to puncture the
balloon at a 45-degree angle

to give it some lift! Only...

How are you going
to puncture it?

Kid, it's probably a good thing
you're not here to witness this.

What does that mean?

Super fun guy is gonna
take it in the tokus.

All right.

(Expelling gas)

Walter: Stand by, cabe.

Fire!

(Expelling gas)

Sylvester: I'm watching
on the satellite now...

There is a
superhero-shaped object

heading towards the pacific.

I think that's the one.

The compressed air is expelling

with enough force to
have super fun guy

traveling at a rate
of 80 miles per hour.

That gives us a splashdown time
of two minutes and 15 seconds!

(Claps) We did it! We're safe!

Whoo! Yes!

Most excellent result.

It's been a long day.
Let's go eat some bird.

I knew this Turkey
wouldn't make it.

(Chuckles) Ah, it's okay, babe.
Maybe, uh... kovelsky's is open.

Kovelsky's for Thanksgiving dinner?
(Door opens)

Why not? I thought that Turkey

would be dry.

♪ ♪

What are you doing here?

I figured with all the time
spent out of the office,

that dinner would be a bust,
so I thought I'd help out

with some Chinese food, you know?
As a...

As a thank you.

Chinese for Thanksgiving?

Let's do it!

Thank you. Thanks.

Uh...

Well, okay, then, uh, have a...

A nice night.

You're not gonna
just let her go?

Ralph: Grandma?

You're not gonna ice your
own mom on Thanksgiving.

I have no relationship with her.
It's uncomfortable...

Right now everyone in
America is getting together

and having an uncomfortable
family dinner.

That's what you do
on Thanksgiving.

Now, come on, kid.

You're better than this.

Would you like to
meet your grandson?

I'd like that very much.

Paige: Ralph.

(Exhales)

Ralph.

It's a true pleasure.

(Door opens)

Ms. Jones?

Can I help you with something?

Oh, your team of, um, wizards...
(Chuckles)

Left their sign-up
sheets at the market.

Not all the signatures
yet, but so close.

Oh, okay. Thank you.

They worked so hard,

got some melons thrown at
them, so...

Wanted to return it.

Okay. Appreciate it.

Would you...
would you like some Chinese?

Oh, I can't.

On my way to my sister's
for Thanksgiving dinner.

Okay, well.

Have a nice holiday.

You, too.

Putz. Huh?

Why don't you ask her out?

She's at least ten
years younger than me.

Everyone's at least ten
years younger than you.

Cabe,
she came here on Thanksgiving

to give you something

she could've given
you next week.

As gross as it sounds,
she's warm for your form.

Great work, Casanova.

(Inhales)

The hell are you wearing?

This is my campaign cape.
I'm trying it out.

Cabe: "Don't be a
clod, vote for dodd."

That sucks.
It should be: "Sly's your guy."

Now lose the cape.
I'm your campaign manager now.

What? Why?

'Cause I care about you, kid.

Ooh! (Indistinct chatter)

Oh. Walter, can...
You and my mom

grab the plates
and set the table?

Yeah, sure. Absolutely. Yeah.

She's more than
just a "top notch"

team member to you, isn't she?

Hmm? I'm a con woman.

I read people.

I tried with Paige,
and I failed.

It's a non-issue.
She's with Tim.

For now.

Walter,

despite my issues with Paige,

I want what's best
for my daughter,

and from what I can tell,

that's you.

So...

I'm gonna help you get her back.

♪ ♪