Original subtitles

First, I am a son of the Low Country, a child of the South.

I'm polite, courteous, chivalrous.

I open doors.

I respect my elders.

I yes sir and no ma'am hold a live long day.

That's a long Bill Curlew, just in case you're curious.

The second thing is I have a very weird heart.

And I don't mean that in a metaphorical English major sense.

I mean physically.

I have a condition, paroxysmal atrial tachycardia, PAT.

I have a racing heart which just gallops up to

200 beats a minute whenever it feels like it.

The doctors think my PAT might be caused by stress,

which is something doctors say when they're stumped.

So that's why I'm a walker of dawn beaches and a watcher of birds.

To keep as far away from this exhausted and silly and heartbreaking world as possible.

To stay calm.

Very calm.

And barely alive.

The first time I got it, the PAT I mean, was in front of my house.

Remember when you were a little kid and you ran for

the sheer joy of running and you never, ever got tired?

That was my last moment of forever running.

Please don't die.

Please.

I waited to die too.

And in waiting, I converted.

A quasi-medical term that means my heartbeat returned to normal.

My second episode happened a year later.

Essentially, what all great religions teach us is the transformation of the self.

To lie down on the summer grass... That's my father.

Given one of his famous home Saturday seminars in comparative religions.

He's a professor at Emory.

He's brilliant.

You must be reborn.

To thrill, to feel, to be surprised.

To be more conscious and alive.

Wake up!

Well, you can imagine.

The devil's in the attic!

Look, son, you didn't see Satan.

You were simply overwhelmed with guilt about peeking into places you really

shouldn't and finding magazines I should feel guilty about but don't.

And hopefully you'll understand later when you're married and lassitude has lassoed

the galloping, priapic pony of your sexuality.

Pony?

What pony?

Am I getting a pony?

No, no, there's no pony.

Jesus.

Then I don't think... what are you talking about?

I'll make it simple, okay?

There is no devil.

But there's no Santa either.

That's the trade-off, Tay-Tay.

Santa and Satan are just symbols for the souls...

My father's book, The History of OWN, is about

the redemptive power of prayer and meditation.

I tried reading it last summer.

I couldn't.

If a cartoon and a titty magazine just about killed

me, a normal life was totally out of the question.

College?

Forget it.

Sex, drugs, and rock and roll?

A death sentence.

And love?

Hey.

Hi.

Are you here by yourself?

Do you have a car?

Um... Do you drive here?

Do you have like a phone or something?

I need to call a cab or a Lyft or whatever.

Um...

What?

You okay?

What?

I said, are you... No, not re... not really.

Well, you don't look so hot.

I have a kind of... condition.

You're sweating a lot.

Do you know that?

I'm having kind of a hard time.

A hard time what?

Just breathing... actually.

Name, please?

Crystal Bryant.

No, I meant him.

Oh, I have no idea.

Look, man, I don't even know him.

Okay?

He was just sitting on the beach, on his ass, and all of a sudden,

kid has a heart attack.

See if we have anything on a Taylor Ogburn.

We need the EKG card.

Crystal Bryant, I'm gonna have to ask you to leave now.

Tell him that or he won't let me go.

Taylor Ogburn, history of paroxysmal atrial tachycardia.

Age?

18.

God!

Number 18.

IV's in.

Do you think the pulse reading would be in order, doctor?

Yeah, yeah, give me the pulse reading.

200.

Yes, Bryant, that's not helping.

Q10, 215.

He's not converting.

That's bad, right?

220.

You're amazing.

240.

250.

We're gonna have to induce conversion.

Get me four cc's of ATP.

Jesus.

Needles.

Well, Miss Bryant, I'm not giving you the shot now, am I?

You know what?

You can just eat me, all right?

Miss Bryant, you're fantastic.

260.

280.

ATP.

Denosine triphosphate.

Taylor, you're gonna feel a kind of warmth spreading up your arm.

Yes?

Ah!

Something's wrong.

No, you're fine.

He's not fine.

Miss Bryant, shut up.

180.

Yep, see?

You're converting.

You're fine.

No.

My heart is bleeding.

I can feel it opening and bleeding.

Fuck.

Bleeding.

I'm going down.

I swear to God, I'm fucking going down.

Nurse, can we get a couple of Valium for this crazy brat?

I can't take Valium.

I'm in the program.

Oh.

Somebody do something.

Oh, I got honey.

Hold on.

Somebody help her.

Honey, I can't.

Jose, we need a little help in here.

I'm gonna hit you on your back.

Roll you over.

Yeah.

Just get her head.

She's in the program.

What program?

A.

All right.

Yes.

It's okay.

Yeah.

My brother, Campbell, is a hot shit artist.

I don't know if his paintings are good or bad.

I do know they're big.

So big, in fact, that when I stand before

them, I can literally feel myself shrinking.

No, thanks.

Right.

Sorry.

How many times you faked the PAT thing?

How do you know I ever faked it?

I would.

At my piano recital?

At your wedding?

Your show in Charleston?

I knew it.

I think there are more, but shame dulls my memory.

Have you ever been in love?

Negative.

Well, what about Mary Elizabeth?

I brought Mary Elizabeth to dinner a couple of weeks ago.

So before dessert, Dad and I went out onto the porch to smoke a joint.

When did Dad start smoking pot?

He says, you ever notice, Mary Elizabeth has a bit of a beak.

Imagine if she had a little mustache.

She'd look just like Larry Bird.

Oh, my God.

He's right.

Yep.

Some things you just can't unsee.

So I dumped him.

Huh.

Huh.

Was there a point to this story or...

The point is I think love is just a trick God plays on

us so we don't feel ashamed of ourselves all the time.

Weird to hear you talk about God.

I mean, do you, you know, believe?

Only marginally.

And then only when it's convenient.

What about Satan?

What about him?

Do you believe in him?

Hell no.

Who needs Satan when we have Republicans?

Morning, Mr. Spencer.

And a good morning to you, my lady of ladies.

Good morning, Taylor.

Has our Kingfisher arrived from New York?

Not yet.

Oh, shoot a monkey.

Well, a good time, I suppose.

Vera is the bell of the honeysuckled sunny southern aphorism.

All in good time, God works in mysterious ways.

Everyone is doing the best they can.

Vera, you know what I admire about you?

I have no idea.

But I'm dying to hear it.

Your resolute cheeriness which flies in the face of

the world's marauding armies of tragedy and darkness.

I think some young southern boy has been reading too much Faulkner.

Or if it's not one thing, it's another.

There are dust devils everywhere.

And our Kingfisher is somewhere between here and New York.

But we'll muddle through somehow.

Vera, when you were a girl... Oh, dear.

What singers did you listen to?

The same ones I listen to now.

Frank Sinatra, Tony Bennett, Miss Joni Mitchell.

And when they sang love songs, did you ever get the feeling that they

were singing about something that you knew absolutely nothing about?

Of course.

Did you ever find out?

Of course.

And so will you.

All in good time?

You're young.

Have faith, sweetness.

Well, I'm late.

Right.

It's Tuesday morning.

Yes, my little group.

Vera, you want to know what I imagine?

Imaginings of an 18-year-old?

Darling, I'm not sure I do.

It's my time.

You ready?

You got to go.

Well, hello, dear.

Hi, my name's Taryn, and I'm an alcoholic.

Hi, Taryn.

Is this your first meeting?

Yes.

I mean, I think I may have made a mistake.

My child, if you're here, it's no mistake.

...the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference.

Welcome.

First, I'd like to thank Susan for bringing the coffee and snacks today.

And do we have any first-timers this morning?

Bravely under the bridge.

Oh, I don't think...

Yes, you in the back.

Hi.

My name is Taylor.

Oh, fuck.

And I'm an alcoholic.

Hi, Taylor.

Welcome, Taylor.

And...

Keep coming back.

All right, so we don't have any birthdays today, and those

of you that got your chips this week got them Tuesday night.

Congratulations.

So, I guess it's time to introduce our speaker for this morning, Crystal.

Hi, my name is Crystal.

Hi, Crystal.

And I'm an alcoholic and an addict.

Okay.

I did the stripper thing, I did the hooker thing, I did the heroin thing,

because something inside of me couldn't stand the light of day.

Everybody all normal, in shorts, throwing frisbees.

Suckers.

Why didn't they know what I knew?

Sunlight is bullshit.

Darkness is king.

And drugs and booze were like the rain.

But after the rain, I was left bone dry and praying for the stranger lying next to

me to have the decency to go away before I open my eyes.

Since I got clean, my eyes are open all the time.

And the light is the truth that God is love.

And the rain that washes me clean is the love that pours down on me in this room.

Hi.

Hello.

Remember me?

Yeah, you're that kid with the fucked up ticker.

Yeah, and you're... Wait.

I liked your speech.

My speech?

Man, I'm not exactly running for class president.

Right.

Well, I liked your whatever.

So, I was wondering if I could buy you a cup of coffee.

No.

It's happening again, isn't it?

What?

The heart thing.

It's happening again, right?

No.

Absolutely not.

Look, man, I am not taking you to the hospital again.

That was a one-time shot.

No.

Absolutely not.

Look, man, I am not taking you to the hospital again.

That was a one-time shot.

You're not dying, are you?

No.

No, I'm not dying.

And if I were you, I'd consider this a pretty good day.

I'm so proud of you.

Do you have a sponsor?

Only when we were young, our toes wiggling at evening dew...

Whenever my mother writes a new poem, we have a family get-together to celebrate.

...forgetting.

Streetlights were old friends and the breath of eve sighed.

No regretting, no regretting.

The stars were lanterns hung just for us by a once in a

blue, blue moon who wept as we slept and awoke too soon.

Too soon.

I have an announcement.

I'm in love.

You?

Get the fuck out of here.

Honest to God, Campbell, I met her at AA.

When did you start drinking?

I was really an alcoholic.

I just went to a meeting by accident because Crystal was there.

Crystal?

Sounds like some kind of stripper.

Well, she is.

Was.

Now, can I have a drink?

Where is this Crystal from?

Who cares?

I love her.

No, you don't.

How the hell do you know?

Can I have that drink now?

No, your heart.

No, no.

My heart is fine.

My heart is in love.

I don't like this.

I don't like this one bit.

Love is... I don't know.

Exactly.

Very dangerous.

Good.

I could use a little danger.

With the Jack Daniels chaser.

You can tell a good bit about someone by where they're from.

Did I ask you where she's from?

You did.

What did you say?

Well, I didn't because I don't know.

Now, can I have one of those?

Give Romeo a shot.

No.

No.

She thinks I'm a drunk.

How can I be a drunk if I've never had a drink?

It's one drink.

Big deal.

What can happen?

Woo-hoo-hoo!

Where is she?

Tay-Tay.

You're not gonna find out there.

Well, not with that attitude.

You don't understand, man.

I'm in love.

With a stripper junkie.

She's more than that.

Aren't we all?

Me.

In love.

Instantly.

Madly.

Head over heels-ly.

Oh, Tay-Tay.

This is so sad, really.

You have a near-death heart thing.

You come out of it and bingo.

Inters Latina.

Queen of the South.

Now you're in love?

You just don't understand.

What the fuck's going on with this red SUV?

Been following us all night.

Hey, you know this guy?

Where are you?

Greenwood Gallery.

How may I?

No.

Actually, I feel like shit.

Okay, I accept that.

However, the marijuana was your idea.

Opium?

You are fucking A Tweety Bird, right?

I want some more and it's all your fault.

So goodbye and fuck you.

Oh.

Hello.

I guess our fucking A Tweety Bird has arrived from the Bronx.

Vera.

I have something to confess.

I'm sure you do.

I'm not really an alcoholic.

Well, God knows you don't smell like one.

I've decided to become your sponsor.

You should be thrilled.

Now, listen carefully, sweet, sweet boy.

Step one.

To admit that I am powerless over alcohol and that my life has become unmanageable.

You don't have enough of a life for it to be unmanageable.

And you're not an alcoholic.

This heroin hooker.

Chicks like her don't fall for guys like you.

What's wrong with me?

I'm a good guy.

Chicks marry good guys.

They fall fuck-happy in love with bad boys.

Oh, my God.

You're absolutely right.

She looks at me like I'm a small jar of

Miracle Whip wearing dockers and penny loafers.

What can I do?

Nothing.

Your essential goodness sticks you completely.

I can be bad.

Go easy on that joint, Rook.

Fuck easy.

It's not bad.

All right.

Jesus.

Okay.

Let's go.

No, thanks.

I'm going to French's for a frosty.

But you said that you would come to, uh...

Jesus.

Me too.

You think they'll notice?

Just sit in the back.

Pretend you're invisible.

Just like school.

All right.

Cool.

Friend, I need a serenity To accept the things I cannot change The courage to

change I don't think she's here, sweetheart.

Perhaps she's at the gallery.

You work at the gallery, don't you?

If memory serves.

Quite the crowd today.

And there is no mystery as to why.

Unfortunately, our speaker has been delayed.

So in the meantime, Oh, well.

Here he is now.

I am Bo.

And I'm an alcoholic and an addict.

Hi, Bo.

When I first joined AA, I was hoping that the

men would fear me and the women would love me.

Now the men love me and the women fear me.

I started smoking pot when I was 12.

My parents used to tell me every time I got high, I was welcoming Satan into my soul.

Satan?

He's being metaphorical, dear.

And it took 30 years of using and a million

miles of bad road to realize they were right.

Satan was in my soul.

I guess he's not being metaphorical.

Satan became my best pal.

I have something to confess.

I can't.

The devil has been in my soul since I was 7.

And I am very, very stoned.

Fear.

The fear that woke me in the morning.

Fear of the dark.

Too much light.

My reflection in the mirror.

Girls.

Clowns.

My father.

Silence.

And just about everything else in between.

But with my best friend Satan, I was never afraid.

And I was never alone.

And then one afternoon, I woke up in Motel Hell.

We've all been there.

Empty bottles of Thunderbird all over the place.

Roaches.

Both kinds.

Weird shit written all over the walls.

Flies.

Buzzing around the syringe.

And something really sticky in my hair.

And then a voice.

Welcome to the end of the line.

Whose voice?

Whose voice?

And then I'm praying.

To who?

And then I'm on my Harley.

Who's driving?

And then I'm in a meeting.

Who brought me here?

We know who.

We all know who.

God as we understand him.

I think God brought us.

All of us together.

And I think faith keeps us coming back.

The faith that gives us wings.

Or at least a soft place to land.

In my father's book, The History of Om, all the major guys, you know, Buddha and

Christ and Muhammad, all talk about how you must be reborn.

You must be reborn.

But I'd always get bored and stop reading.

So I never knew exactly why you had to be reborn.

Until now.

Hey, sport.

What happened to you?

Eating out, busy being born, is busy dying, y'all.

You want a ride?

Maybe my back of the bike days are long gone.

Now why is that?

I get the wind in my hair and I start feeling a little too free if you follow me.

So I walk.

One step at a time.

My boy.

In the penny loafers and the sport coat on the beach.

What about him?

A lot.

In a coat and tie.

I was thinking that if I looked normal...

I get the picture.

Inside I was a zoo parade of fear.

Fear of everything.

Fear of the dark.

My reflection in the mirror.

Fear of the dark.

Girls.

My father.

Clowns.

Thunder.

My shadow.

The sound of my heartbeat.

Life.

Death.

And everything in between.

Guess that would explain the whole heart thing.

Guess it would.

I think God got us here.

All together.

All together.

And I think faith keeps us coming back.

The faith that gives us wings.

Or at least a soft place to land.

How old are you?

18.

You sure don't talk 18.

I have a very old soul.

Hey, Ma!

What's up?

I got math.

Hey, baby.

Evening, son.

And what a lovely evening it is.

Am I right?

Soft.

You know what I mean?

Like velvet.

Like that part of a woman.

Can I help you?

You know a night like this makes a man wish he was big enough to fuck it.

And I am.

You don't believe me?

Ask her.

Holy shit.

Your P.A.T.

thing must have gone crazy.

Well, that's the strange part.

It didn't.

Why do you think?

I think it's because I was being Bo.

Who's Bo?

You know, I think I could be really good at being Bo.

The fuck are you talking about?

Bo is my paintbrush.

Henceforth, I paint myself in Bo.

Who the fuck is Bo?

Why are you walking like that?

It's my Bo walk.

You know, cool.

With an undercurrent of tragedy.

I'm detached from the worldly bullshit but in touch with the pain.

There she is.

Dude, she's too much for your little life, Tay-Tay.

Not for Bo's.

Son of a bitch!

What happened?

My kid.

He got into a fight.

What kind of sick fucker would start a fight with a kid in a wheelchair?

My kid started it.

Bobby.

Bobby always starts it.

Boyer Stones, does he ever actually win?

Bobby always wins.

He runs them down and then he runs them over.

Lots of anger, your boy.

You know what?

Pardon my fucking French, but exactly what the fuck are you doing in my car?

Just riding shotgun.

Trying to be your pal and searching the horizon for

the serenity to accept the things that I cannot change.

He's got a lot to be angry about.

His father was driving.

He was so loaded he backed over him in the driveway.

He didn't come back either.

This is usually where my gentleman colors get out.

Yeah?

Well, fuck them if they can't take a joke.

Which?

Just suspended because I didn't start it.

Give me the cigarette.

What cigarette?

Why don't you give your mother the cigarette?

Why don't you eat my ass?

Can I, uh...

help?

Nope.

You tricked that thing out yourself.

Trick?

Guess who I think I saw today?

I have no idea.

Oh, I bet you do.

He went back to civilization.

Says you.

I saw him outside the window in biology, lurking.

No, you didn't.

Yes, I did.

I know lurking when I see it and that fucker was lurking.

Freaking me out while I was in the middle of dissecting the frog.

What the fuck is he doing here anyway, huh?

Lurking like a motherfucker.

Can we watch the language for one fucking second, please?

Who's the kid lurking in the backseat?

I.

Did my mom tell you about lurker number one?

I guess your mom will tell me all about whomever when the time is right.

What makes you think that?

I think you're gonna be around long enough.

I have to get back to work or the manager will fire me.

Keep fucking smiling.

Could you get this dimwit home for me, please?

No, that's okay, mom.

I can walk.

Yeah.

I feel bad that you're in a wheelchair.

But not that bad.

I got enough shit to keep me awake at night.

And if you think that I'm gonna act like I feel bad for you in front of your mother

just so I can get in her pants, well, you got your head up, you young ass.

And know this.

I'm not just another guy that's out of your life before you know his last name.

Kid.

How old are you, man?

Eighteen.

You're hitting on my mom and you're two years older than me?

Fucking beautiful.

Eighteen.

I have a very old soul.

I hope you didn't try that tired old line on my mom.

I would have thought only old bags would work in a joint like this.

Or gay guys.

Fucking birds.

I'm running the joint while the old bag is having a procedure.

Cancer, huh?

No, not cancer.

A procedure.

Jesus.

Hey.

What's this one?

Oh, the trumpeter swan.

You like it?

I don't know.

It's my favorite.

I've never seen one in real life.

This song is supposed to be amazing.

It only sings when it flies.

I get that.

Somebody painted this?

Somebody did.

I think I'm going to cry.

Really?

Bobby.

Didn't get to catch your name.

Taylor.

Oh, shit.

Taylor.

Name like that, sweet face like yours.

Where I've been, you'd be fucking prom queen.

I'm going to have to ask you to put that cigarette out.

Sucking up to the boy to bone my old lady.

You're obvious, sir.

Like balls on a tall dog.

Let's take a ride.

Come on.

One more step, motherfucker.

Oh.

You got me all shook up.

Ow.

Ow.

Now you see here, I'm going to take the boy back to his mama.

Then I'm going to fall on my knees and beg her to forgive me and take me back.

Then we're going to go back to Savannah where we belong.

And she'll thank me too, as you should, for being a gentleman

and not turning your fucking lights out right here and now.

Let's go.

Kind of stunned it doesn't hurt more.

Get on.

All right, go.

Whoa.

Keep going, come on.

He's not getting up.

I think we're all right.

Oh, my God!

You're happy.

Thanks a lot.

Tell me something I don't know.

Do you see him?

No, I don't see him.

I don't see him.

You know, I really think I need to go to the hospital.

Oh, shit.

Oh, my God.

Oh, God.

Oh, God.

Oh, shit.

Yes!

Yes!

All right, go.

Come on.

This thing can go faster than that.

Fuck you, Willie.

Whoo!

Dr. Farley?

Oh, another episode of... No.

But apparently, I've been stabbed.

Whoa!

Get back, Loretta.

Okay.

I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you to leave.

Immediate family only.

Oh, it's all right.

This is my cousin.

Once removed.

Who did this to you?

The devil.

I don't have any gloves.

Don't be such a pussy.

Willie isn't the devil.

Should I be bleeding this much?

I don't have any damn gloves.

Anybody who believes in the devil should give people more credit.

Right on.

Maybe some stitches.

You can't believe the people that I see in here.

Those stupid people.

People who smoke really bad.

People without proper insurance.

People that are just really sick and they're just gonna die.

No matter what I do.

You can't smoke in here.

Ah, fuck it.

Give me a drink.

Honest to God, I think I just need some stitches.

You are a pussy.

It's just a flesh wound.

You know...

You know, Bobby, sometimes I wonder why I do what I do.

Well, maybe, before you try to cure the sick, you ought to forgive them.

You're right.

Of course.

I'm just a terrible doctor.

Yeah.

Dr. Farley, please report to admitting.

Dr. Farley?

My leg?

Jesus Christ.

Can I forgive them?

You're pretty smart.

Here's how smart I am.

I know that now that old Willie's back in the picture, you have no shot with my mom.

No shot at all.

Not that you ever did, Mr. Old Soul.

Does she love him?

My mom's cleaned up her act.

A lot.

That's one last thing she's addicted to that she'll never shake.

What's that?

Misery.

Think you can walk?

Much obliged.

All right.

You should forget it.

Willie eats white boys like you for breakfast.

After a million miles of bad road, I can handle a guy like Willie.

Yeah, yeah.

Fucking little...

What the hell happened to you?

I'll meet you outside.

Um...

It's kind of complicated.

Is it all right if I lie now and tell you the truth later?

Of course.

I fail.

I'm so sorry.

This is a new look for you.

Yes, it's very bold.

Ooh, my, my, my.

It wasn't just a procedure, was it?

Course not.

You know us old Southern Bells.

Is it... Cancer?

Course.

Fuck.

Ask where.

Oh.

Here, there, everywhere.

Are you scared?

I'm not afraid.

Dear heart, my soul's an old pro.

But my body's a rookie who can't seem to hit a sliding curve.

However, as your sponsor... No, Vera, don't worry about that.

I want to make sure...

we got through all 12 steps.

Before I set sail for the great perhaps.

So...

taking three or four giant steps at a time...

here's basically the idea.

Don't drink.

Don't use.

Don't lie.

Ever.

To anyone.

Especially to yourself.

Be kind.

Be fearless.

Be gentle.

Find God.

Talk to him daily.

Then keep coming back.

What if I keep coming back, and all of a sudden I find myself getting in way,

way too deep?

That's my favorite place in the whole world.

Too deep.

Oh, lordy, damn.

To be young and in too deep.

To be young You keep coming back too, okay?

Don, I'll keep coming back till I get it right.

So, after the accident, my father took off.

Six months later they found him in the motel room and I spayed the details.

I can't walk and he kills himself.

What's up with that?

It's fucked up.

I guess somewhere along the lines I decided to live.

But my mom, she didn't really decide one way or the other.

So she just lives and dies at the same time.

Then really showed up and you know the other stuff.

Let's get you home.

Listen, I just want you to know, before you jump into our lives,

man, this might be a good time to reconsider.

Come on!

Alright, here we go!

That was excellent.

Ow!

Are you alright?

Yeah.

What the hell?

Where's the van?

What the hell happened to your leg?

Willie.

What?

Him.

How the hell was I supposed to know what you were trying to say?

When I look back to stop, I hit the curb and I swear to God

I saw you go ten feet like a ballistic missile or something.

That doesn't look so hot.

Yeah, well, it is what it is.

Take off your pants.

Nope, in the exit line if there ever was one.

Good night, kids.

Thanks for not killing me, bro.

Well, uh, we need to take you to the hospital.

Oh, we went.

But your son there sent Dr. Farley into an existential tailspin.

He was useless.

Am I hurting you?

Not in a bad way.

Why is a guy like Willie...

I mean, why is a guy like that even in your world?

I don't get it.

You don't know anything about my world.

You're too... Young?

I know.

Blah, blah, blah.

Why?

There's a kind of guy.

The kind of guy who figures out exactly where you live.

And then he just moves in.

I got sober.

I did some housecleaning.

And out with the bad air went Willie.

But Bobby says that you'll go back to him.

Whenever he wants.

I guess that's the kind of mother I've been.

All right.

Um... What?

Uh, I think I should put my pants back on.

Oh, right.

Sorry.

Okay.

No, no, don't apologize.

Don't ever apologize.

He's gonna show up here.

Tonight, tomorrow.

Sometime...

he's gonna come for me.

And he's not gonna like the sound of no.

And he's not gonna like the sight of you.

I wouldn't worry too much about Willie.

How you guys like Willie for breakfast?

I haven't heard Bobby laugh like that in a long time.

Beautiful.

Yes.

I was talking about the...

song.

Savannah Finch.

I like that you know that.

I've had to give up just about everything there is to give up.

But if you don't kiss me right now, I think I'll go crazy.

You have to be quiet.

What time is she coming?

I made a lovely quiche with ham.

She's not a vegetarian, is she?

She's the next hooker.

What?

A stripper?

No, she's not a vegetarian.

Where is she from again?

Who cares where she's from?

Savannah, there.

Christ.

I'm gonna have a mimosa.

Anyone care to join me?

No.

Why not?

It's after 1.

I told her we're all alcoholics and that we can't drink.

Neither am I.

And the only one in this family who's an alcoholic is you.

And you're just pretending to be an alcoholic so you can keep getting into her pants.

Dad, come on, listen to me, please.

I told her we're all in the program and that...

Why in the world would you tell her that?

What?

I can't remember.

But I'm sure I had a very good reason.

That's because you're pussy-whipped.

Pussy-whipped?

Well, that's news.

Don't you think, Wyatt?

After all these years wondering if he was gay.

Oh, God.

This calls for a drink.

No.

Perhaps a doobie.

No.

You're being an asshole.

No, you're being an asshole.

Listen, Tay-Tay, you can put on a wife beater

and hobnail boots, but I can still kick your ass.

Why are you dressed like that?

Like some kind of... I don't know what.

A biker.

But precisely, a biker.

Oh, big deal.

I bought a bike.

What?

It's all right.

Look, it's right there.

That's my hog.

Ain't she sweet?

Do you have a hernia?

Why are you walking like that?

Bo.

Bo?

He's just being Bo.

I'm lost.

Look, Bo is this guy who...

Oh, this is pointless.

Look, Mom, you have your poems.

Campbell, you have your paintings.

Dad, you have your books.

I have nothing except for my horseshit heart.

Until now.

Now I have Bo.

Bo is my work of art, and I am in love.

You sound insane, boy.

Yes, I've gone mad.

I've become, at long last, an Ogburn, and you should all be very proud.

I am.

And by the way, y'all a bunch of drunks and stoners, and the only reason that you

get away with it is because y'all are so fabulous and brilliant and good-looking.

Well, I think I told Crystal y'all in AA because you should be.

And if you call me Tay-Tay in front of her, I swear to God... Okay, Tay-Tay.

You son of a bitch!

Stop it!

Stop it!

Stop it!

That's enough!

Stop it!

No more!

No more!

Stop!

Stop!

Get up!

Get up!

She's here.

She's here!

Hi.

This is so crazy.

Come on in.

They're just dying to meet you.

Come on.

Welcome.

Tay-Tay just made a mess.

Picking it up.

I am so sorry.

I really mean it.

I'm gonna check on the quiche.

Dad, this is Crystal and her son Bobby.

Welcome.

Welcome.

Crystal, is it?

Crystal?

Yes it is.

Crystal.

Crystal it is.

Crystal, welcome.

Crystal it is.

Well, can I get anyone an iced tea or perhaps a lemonade?

An iced tea would be lovely.

I get it.

Me too.

Yeah, two, Wyatt.

Two.

Well, why don't we all sit down?

Let me take your coat.

Yeah.

You have a lovely home, Mrs. Ogburn.

Oh, please, Poppy.

Can I get you something to drink?

I think your husband's... Oh!

What in the world is keeping my husband so long?

Excuse me.

Hey.

Hey.

Taylor tells me that you're a painter.

He told you I'm a painter because...

I am a painter.

I am.

That's right.

What a charming coincidence.

What?

Wyatt!

What are you doing?

We promised no drinking.

Seems I am forced into what someone weaker than myself call a confession.

Tell me.

I know her.

Bobby.

Your eyes are so deep, I'm drowning in them.

That was too much, wasn't it?

Just a bit, sir.

I'm gonna go to the... I'll be right back.

He's so shy.

Oh, yeah, he's just...

the king of shy.

I need to use the restroom.

Let me show you where it is.

I can handle it.

Just tell me where.

That's down the hall and to the left.

All right.

Hey.

Wanna shoot that puppy my way, Ace?

I'm getting kind of a bad feeling.

In your heart?

Do we have to go to the hospital?

Do we have to go right now?

Nope.

Maybe we should go right now.

Just in case.

I'm fine.

Oh, fuck you, Wyatt!

Fuck you!

I bet you know ill will, darling.

We women do what we have to do to survive.

However, fuck you, Wyatt!

That's just, uh, her way of...

I don't know.

Mom!

I gotta go.

Where's Bobby?

How would you like it to be?

I think I kinda do.

Maybe we can work something out.

What the hell?

God damn it.

Oh.

Uh-huh.

It...

Shit.

Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Take it easy.

What the fuck?

I didn't do anything.

Shut up, Campbell.

Wait!

What happened?

Maybe, just maybe, I could have one normal day in my life with a normal family in one

of those houses you drive by and dream about.

Just normal fucking day with my son.

Today can still be normal, I swear to God.

Right, Bobby?

I can't remember what we're talking about.

That's because your brother got him stomped.

And your father, Jesus!

Just when I think I've got my life turned around.

My past comes and jumps up and bites me in the ass like a junkyard dog.

Wait, wait, wait, just one moment.

I think there are some situations that you can

and there are situations you cannot control.

I'm an idiot.

You just gotta learn to accept the things you cannot fuck.

Thanks a lot.

What happened?

Ask your father.

Dad?

I think monkish silence is in order.

Oh, fuck.

Getting the kid high.

What is the matter with you people?

You people is your people.

Not anymore.

Now I renounce you.

I renounce you totally.

Y'all have everything and for the first time I had someone who was mine.

She wasn't yours.

In my heart she was.

In my heart I was not alone anymore.

Baby, you've never been alone.

I have always been alone.

Ever since finding Satan in the attic.

Satan?

In the attic?

Dude.

And I run to tell you and all you did was promise me a pony.

Pony?

What pony?

And now you do this.

I never promised him a pony.

Hey!

I thought I told you to fuck off.

I tried.

It didn't work.

Now listen, I know that you don't want to hear this.

But I really love you.

And there's nothing you can do and nothing

you can say that will ever, ever make me stop.

Try this on for size.

I know your father.

That's my car.

Right?

Right?

That's my car.

You think you're freaked out?

I walk into your house with my son and there he is.

Spanky.

Spanky?

Your father.

He told us he was a roadie with the Allman Brothers.

Us?

You know, the girls.

Shit.

Why'd you call him Spanky?

You are young.

Same hood.

Same rock.

Same block.

Well, well, well.

Here's the irony of the thing.

Irony and spanking in the same story.

Your father gives me this book.

The History of Own.

And that book knocked me out.

Right off of my feet.

To catch a raindrop on your top.

To be alive in the dawn of your new story.

How was I supposed to know that Spanky was Dr. Wyatt Ogburn?

You just assumed that he was a well-read roadie for the Allman Brothers?

Hi, folks.

Please remember to not park in front of D &D on the parkway after 2 p.m.

I started... I started chanting.

During the actual spanking sessions...

Would you take breaks?

And we'll do birthdays next Monday.

Sir, we have a no-smoking policy.

Oh.

Everyone?

Laura, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change.

The courage to change the things I can.

And the wisdom to know the difference.

Why don't you all have a seat?

All right, for those of you that had the great misfortune of missing last week's

speaker and those of you who have clamored for his return, Bo, everyone.

Oh, yeah!

Yeah, he's good, he's good.

Hi, I'm Bo, and I'm an alcoholic and an addict.

When I first joined AA, I wanted the men to fear me and the women to love me.

But now, the men love me and the women fear me.

I smoked my first joint when I was 12.

My parents, they were devout Baptists, so they took me to the minister and he

said to me, every time I smoked marijuana, I was letting the devil into my soul.

The devil!

That's right.

That's my friend.

Because Satan's fuel is nothing more than fear.

The fear that danced around in my dreams.

The fear of the dark.

Too much light.

My reflection in the mirror.

My father's eyes.

His silence.

His voice.

After a million miles of bad road, I woke up to flies buzzing around a syringe.

And empty bottles of Thunderbird everywhere.

Weird shit written all over the walls.

And something really sticky in my hair.

And then a voice.

Welcome to the end of the line.

Whose voice?

I think God got us here.

And I think faith keeps us coming back.

The faith that gives us wings.

Or at least a soft place to land.

Happy landing, Poe.

So now, you gotta ask yourself.

Why are you here?

What's chasing you?

Who's chasing you?

Why do you think it can't get you in this room?

Boy, am I glad to see you.

There, there, dear heart.

I'm not dead yet.

I am, however, moving to Detroit.

To live with my son.

He insists.

Detroit's a little better than being dead.

Don't you think?

Vera, I don't think I can keep coming back anymore.

Oh dear.

I just don't know what I'm coming back to.

You're leaving.

The gallery's closing.

My family's blowing up right in front of me.

And she's gone.

Ah.

She.

You know, Taylor, sometimes coming back over

and over again is just plain embarrassing.

And foolish.

Because the more you keep coming back, the farther and

farther away whatever you've been coming back for gets.

It's a corollary to this.

The more desperately you think you want something, the more you're never,

ever gonna get it.

So what do you do?

You wait.

Be still.

And wait.

For what?

For whatever you've been coming back to, to come back to you.

I wonder if it doesn't come back.

I don't have time for what ifs.

Here.

This should help.

I'm really gonna miss you.

Now go on.

Be young.

Don't worry about both of us.

I'm gonna blow my fucking brains out.

God.

How long do you think he's gonna be up there?

It's been days.

What do you think he's doing?

His wallowing.

On a theoretical level, you think parents are responsible for everything?

Generally, no.

Specifically?

Yes.

In that case, shall we?

I can't live.

I can't live.

I can't live.

I can't give anymore.

I can't give anymore.

I can't give anymore.

Son?

We just, we've been talking, and we just want to,

as a family, apologize if we in any way... Stop.

It occurs to me, Dad, that I never would

have met you if you hadn't written that book.

It occurs to me, Mom, that her beauty would have sailed

right over my head if I had never read one of your poems.

And it occurs to me, Campbell, that I never would have been bold enough

to paint myself in bow if it hadn't been for the boldness of your brush.

What have you been doing up here?

Waiting.

For what?

Hey, man.

Okay, it's okay.

What?

Okay, got it.

I'm on the way.

Is she here?

No.

Are you okay?

Yeah, but I'm glad you're here.

Willie has completely lost his shit.

He says he went to some meeting and they voodooed his ass.

He doesn't sleep, he just draws like a madman

and screams at my mom that she's a witch.

Where is she?

I'm just stuck in this fucking chair watching the days die and listening to the

flies buzz and I got a bad case of the dreads.

And the only dude I could think of was you.

Where is she?

This ought to be good.

Gee.

Hi.

Hi, Mom.

Nice to see you again.

Glad you're still breathing.

Fucking thrilled.

Do you remember Taylor?

Huh?

What the fuck are you... You know what?

Doesn't even matter.

Oh, Jesus.

Are you high?

Okay.

All right.

Pack up your shit.

We're getting out of here.

What the fuck are you doing?

Give me my shit.

Hey, no.

I'm taking you and I'm taking Bobby and I'm taking you home.

Oh, Rick.

Are you fucking serious?

Are you kidding me with this shit?

Fucking Sterling money.

Okay, don't look.

Don't look at my back if you don't want to find it.

You promised.

You promised.

Hey, hey.

Get down.

Stay there.

Come on.

I'm helping you.

We are helping you.

You said you weren't using anymore.

I'm not using.

I'm just tired.

Okay?

And yeah, you're going to help.

Okay?

That's going to be so great.

Mom, stop your bullshit.

Every time you get into this shit, I get fucked.

I'm done.

I'm done.

Why do you keep doing this to me?

You're supposed to be my mother.

You're supposed to be my mother.

Please, just listen to Taylor.

Taylor.

Taylor, where are we going?

Home.

That's a good idea.

Boy, am I glad to hear you say that.

Me and your dad can explain the whole spanking thing to your mom.

I'm sure she'll get past it.

You think?

Oh, sure.

Women get over stuff like that in a heartbeat.

They do?

I've been giving this a lot of thought.

You and I should just get it over with and get married already.

I'm serious.

You know, guys like you don't come down the pike every day, you know?

Bruh, thanks.

I don't have all the time in the world to sit

around waiting for the older version of you.

And you've really proven yourself.

I know you can take care of Willie when he comes looking for me.

She gone.

Hey.

Boy, you reckon she went.

Let's do it.

I was thinking...

maybe we move on down to Clearwater.

Clearwater?

Yeah.

You can get a job.

You know, working on, like, a boat.

It's pretty low stress.

What with your ticker and whatnot.

Right.

A boat.

What not.

And then we have a baby.

Wow.

And right away.

Like I say, I don't have all the time in the world.

Right.

Like you said.

Now, a baby can really do a number on your finances.

But I think I've got that covered.

I know a couple guys.

From the old days.

Who live down in Clearwater.

And one of them has a club.

And, you know, I could do a little dancing.

You know, just a few lap dances.

Every now and then.

Just to help pay for the rent.

Are you okay?

Uh, I don't think I can drive.

Okay, okay.

Okay, don't panic.

Bobby?

Bobby, wake up.

What?

It's happening again.

What's happening?

It's his heart!

What's wrong with his heart?

Okay, just slow down.

I'll drive.

Okay.

Slow down.

Just stop.

Just stop right here.

It's fine.

Taylor!

What's wrong with you?

I thought you guys were friends.

You haven't talked about this?

I don't know.

Hey.

Oh my God.

Come on.

You're gonna have to help me.

This is a really, really bad one.

It's

down here right now.

You just turn right...

Willie?

Spanky?

Oh, man.

Ain't this a big one?

You're a sight for sore eyes.

Look at you.

Oh, shit.

What the goddamn hell you doing in a fancy place like this, Spanky?

Excuse me?

Darling, this is Willie.

A friend of Spanky's.

Who's Spanky?

Well, he is.

Spanky, I ain't seen you in...

Hey, fuck you, Spanky!

You the one gave my girl that old fag book.

I beg your pardon?

Yeah, the one about praying to fuck off.

She done up and ran off.

Now, fag book?

Now, sit here, Willie.

I dare you to read it.

Why don't you double dare him, Spanky?

Everybody, shut the fuck up.

I'm gonna cut the shit out of you, Spanky.

And then, I'm gonna take this here fine, sexy piece of elder trim out to my ride.

I got the devil with me, and I hear he likes the white.

Now, what the hell?

You gonna make me lose my damn temper, Spanky?

You cut off my tooth.

You cut off my motherfuckin' toe!

Oh, my God.

Oh, shit!

Nigga, you done cut off my damn toe!

I'm sorry, Willie.

I didn't have my glasses.

I'm sorry.

You know what?

While you were attacking my family... You didn't really walk down the beach for ever.

Oh, my God!

I got the tooth!

All right.

Right here in front of us.

Right here in front, okay?

That was, uh...

They're turning me.

Here we go.

Here we go.

You hold on.

I'm just gonna... Why don't you come over and grab me?

I got it.

I got it.

I got you.

I got you.

I got you.

Willie?

Taylor?

Crystal?

What happened?

Holy shit!

There's more of us?

We have his toe.

Fuck his toe!

Where's my Escalade?

Nurse, get that carjacker into whole water.

Can I get an orderly out here?

Jesus Christ!

Am I the only effin' doctor in this whole effin' house?

Crystal!

What is... What's going on?

Okay.

Excuse me!

Set up the ATP.

220.

240.

Jesus Christ!

250.

60, please.

Just breathe.

No, I don't want ATP!

Taylor, take a breath.

Are you listening to me?

Let's go now.

Come on.

Let's get that ATP rolling, all right?

Let's go.

And statter.

This place is gonna be in trouble.

Oh, God.

No,

no.

Wait, wait, wait, wait.

You can do this, Taylor.

I swear to God.

You don't need that.

It's your heart, baby.

You can.

Just breathe.

And listen to me.

Okay?

It's just...

fear.

That's right.

Breathe.

90.

80 and dropping.

That's right, baby.

Nicely done, Miss Bryant.

We're out of the woods.

Is every day in the Arbor House like this?

This is nothing.

You ought to see the holidays.

Well... Ha, ha, ha.

Hey.

Hey.

I need to tell you something.

I feel sort of ashamed about that whole Bo charade.

It's all right.

I like you a lot better than Bo.

Hi.

My name's Taylor.

And I'm an alcoholic.

You actually sound proud of that.

What if a guy took a couple of Xanax every now and then if he couldn't sleep?

How old are you?

A bottle of red wine with dinner.

I'm a very old soul.

A Vicodin or two with my Sunday paper.

I'm always gonna love you.

Always.

In Clearwater.

What do you think?

I think I might have a problem.

It occurs to me that falling in love is a lot like dreaming.

And I don't want to wake up in Clearwater.

I'm sorry.

I'm really, really sorry.

Doctor.

Yeah?

Our son.

Who?

Taylor?

Taylor Ogburn.

Everything is just peachy.

Peachy?

Is that like a medical term?

He's okay.

He's sleeping.

We just need to watch him overnight.

Y'all should get some rest.

He's being discharged in the morning.

Well.

Shall we?

Yes, yes, yes, yes.

You alright, dear?

I need help.

I do have a problem.

I most definitely have a problem.

I think I might need to go to a meeting.

Tonight we're gonna party.

And tomorrow we're gonna go to a meeting.

First meeting.

And tomorrow the next thing.

One of them.

I'll go then.

We're gonna go to two meetings.

I don't know.

I'll call y'all.

Not sure when they're gonna let me use a phone.

So don't wait by it.

But I'll check in.

Hey.

Hey.

I'm sorry.

I didn't want it to seem more true.

But I'm sorry.

I'm the one that you got stuck with, baby.

I'm not.

I'm not.

Come here.

I love you.

I love you too.

It's really cool.

That Bobby stays with you guys for a little while.

For a little while.

For a lot of while.

Whatever.

Thank you.

I'll be back in six weeks.

You take care of Bobby for me.

I swear.

I'll take care of that heart of yours too.

Okay?

Down

the lane, a million or so thrushes are bursting into sweet demented song.

And there are cattails on the willow bushes.

And evenings are green again, are green and long.

And wouldn't you think I'd be used to hearing all the noisy clamorings of spring?

And would have learned by now this April veering of wings and buds of hours

lengthening?

Oh, I know it well.

With ears and eyes it's my old heart that still stammers with surprise.