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[medic] The big question is,
how aggressive do you want to be?
3
00:01:22,291 --> 00:01:24,918
[Leigh] Very aggressive.
We don't want to lose any more time.
4
00:01:25,002 --> 00:01:27,796
You've been trying for... two years?
5
00:01:28,171 --> 00:01:29,171
And four months.
6
00:01:31,383 --> 00:01:33,385
I have the app monitoring ovulation,
7
00:01:33,802 --> 00:01:35,512
taking temperature and mucus levels,
8
00:01:35,596 --> 00:01:38,432
we've been planning and pacing
intercourse.
9
00:01:38,599 --> 00:01:40,183
It's been very romantic.
10
00:01:41,602 --> 00:01:43,604
So we're looking at IUI or IVF.
11
00:01:43,895 --> 00:01:46,523
- IUI is the least invasive.
- [Leigh] And outpatient.
12
00:01:46,607 --> 00:01:47,607
IUI...?
13
00:01:48,567 --> 00:01:50,652
Didn't you read the thing?
I told you to read it.
14
00:01:50,736 --> 00:01:53,989
Intrauterine insemination. The sperm
are injected directly into the uterus.
15
00:01:54,072 --> 00:01:56,408
- And yes, it's outpatient
- Let's start there.
16
00:01:56,783 --> 00:01:58,660
- You're 39, Steven?
- Uh-huh.
17
00:01:58,952 --> 00:02:01,997
Okay, we'll test your sperm
for count and motility percentage.
18
00:02:02,080 --> 00:02:04,958
And how far away are we
from your period, Leigh?
19
00:02:05,042 --> 00:02:07,336
It's unpredictable.
A week, maybe ten days.
20
00:02:07,669 --> 00:02:09,129
Your cycle's unpredictable?
21
00:02:10,589 --> 00:02:11,589
Is that a problem?
22
00:02:12,299 --> 00:02:13,800
Possibly, possibly not.
23
00:02:13,884 --> 00:02:16,011
That and your age are all factors.
24
00:02:16,094 --> 00:02:18,889
Over 35, the situation
becomes more difficult.
25
00:02:19,389 --> 00:02:21,016
But very often it's manageable.
26
00:02:21,183 --> 00:02:23,518
But it might be likely
that based on your test results,
27
00:02:23,602 --> 00:02:25,020
we go straight to in vitro.
28
00:02:25,520 --> 00:02:28,774
- [Leigh] Will Insurance help with that?
- [medic] Most companies won't cover IVF,
29
00:02:28,857 --> 00:02:32,152
but very often the genetic testing
for the man will be covered.
30
00:02:32,235 --> 00:02:33,612
Oh, that sounds fair.
31
00:02:34,279 --> 00:02:36,990
All right, so, Steven,
when can we schedule your tests?
32
00:02:37,074 --> 00:02:38,241
Which tests?
33
00:02:39,284 --> 00:02:41,620
A blood panel for chromosomal diagnosis,
34
00:02:41,703 --> 00:02:42,829
a sample of your semen.
35
00:02:42,913 --> 00:02:44,498
When did you last ejaculate?
36
00:02:45,332 --> 00:02:46,332
A week.
37
00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:48,000
Maybe less.
38
00:02:48,043 --> 00:02:49,127
No, it's two weeks.
39
00:02:49,670 --> 00:02:50,670
When...
40
00:02:53,173 --> 00:02:55,217
We'll need to reschedule it
for another time.
41
00:02:55,300 --> 00:02:57,260
We need you within
three to five days after.
42
00:03:01,932 --> 00:03:03,058
Homework, honey.
43
00:03:08,855 --> 00:03:09,981
We gotta talk.
44
00:03:11,692 --> 00:03:12,692
About what?
45
00:03:14,194 --> 00:03:15,194
Steve?
46
00:03:17,656 --> 00:03:18,656
Steve!
47
00:03:19,616 --> 00:03:20,616
Steve.
48
00:03:21,952 --> 00:03:23,120
Steve!
49
00:03:26,748 --> 00:03:28,291
Oh. I'm sorry.
50
00:03:30,502 --> 00:03:32,671
- I'll just...
- I can fix this.
51
00:03:32,754 --> 00:03:35,924
[Shirley] No, I don't want to cancel it,
I just wanted a usage alert.
52
00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:39,010
So you'll text me next time it's used?
53
00:03:40,512 --> 00:03:41,596
Okay. Thanks.
54
00:03:42,806 --> 00:03:44,307
He hasn't used the credit card yet.
55
00:03:44,391 --> 00:03:46,268
They're going to send me an alert
when he does.
56
00:03:46,351 --> 00:03:48,019
We can get a location from that.
57
00:03:48,603 --> 00:03:50,355
God, I hope he...
58
00:03:50,772 --> 00:03:53,942
just tries an ATM and doesn't
trade the card for dope.
59
00:03:54,276 --> 00:03:55,276
Does he have your PIN?
60
00:03:55,902 --> 00:03:56,778
Are you kidding?
61
00:03:56,862 --> 00:03:58,238
Why would he try an ATM?
62
00:03:58,530 --> 00:04:01,199
I'm sorry, Steve.
Do you have a better suggestion?
63
00:04:01,450 --> 00:04:03,493
He took the card to use the card,
64
00:04:03,577 --> 00:04:05,078
and now we'll know if he does.
65
00:04:07,831 --> 00:04:09,708
He didn't have to break the house.
66
00:04:10,041 --> 00:04:11,960
No, I don't think he did.
67
00:04:12,252 --> 00:04:13,295
Me neither.
68
00:04:13,420 --> 00:04:15,505
Someone ask you what you think, Theodora?
69
00:04:15,964 --> 00:04:17,007
Sorry.
70
00:04:17,591 --> 00:04:19,342
[Shirley] If it wasn't Luke, who was it?
71
00:04:19,426 --> 00:04:20,719
[Steve] Maybe one of your kids.
72
00:04:21,219 --> 00:04:22,596
Yeah, that makes sense.
73
00:04:22,804 --> 00:04:23,930
It's probably my kids.
74
00:04:24,181 --> 00:04:27,142
Or maybe it was the guy
who just stole a car
75
00:04:27,225 --> 00:04:28,393
to put a needle in his arm.
76
00:04:28,477 --> 00:04:30,270
I'm worried about
a lot more than that.
77
00:04:30,353 --> 00:04:31,480
What do you mean?
78
00:04:31,563 --> 00:04:35,233
I mean, that suicides
can cluster in families,
79
00:04:35,567 --> 00:04:36,735
especially twins.
80
00:04:37,652 --> 00:04:39,196
If they lose a twin,
81
00:04:39,571 --> 00:04:40,822
the odds go up.
82
00:04:41,573 --> 00:04:44,993
He may not be planning to come home.
83
00:04:46,328 --> 00:04:48,163
Where... Where would he go?
84
00:04:48,246 --> 00:04:49,372
He could be anywhere.
85
00:04:50,707 --> 00:04:54,127
He was picked up off Mass Ave a few times
when he was living here.
86
00:04:54,711 --> 00:04:56,046
Methadone Mile.
87
00:04:56,880 --> 00:04:59,257
- What's that?
- Mass Ave, south of downtown.
88
00:04:59,341 --> 00:05:01,968
It's basically an open-air drug market.
89
00:05:02,511 --> 00:05:03,511
I remember it.
90
00:05:04,304 --> 00:05:06,515
- I'll go look for him.
- It's a waste of gas.
91
00:05:06,723 --> 00:05:08,809
- He could be anywhere.
- Yeah, I'll go with you.
92
00:05:08,892 --> 00:05:09,892
I got this.
93
00:05:09,976 --> 00:05:11,061
[Shirley] Just wait a bit.
94
00:05:11,144 --> 00:05:13,289
- We'll see if he's using the card.
- Call me if he does.
95
00:05:13,313 --> 00:05:14,993
[Shirley] Are you gonna drive in circles?
96
00:05:15,065 --> 00:05:17,943
- Hope he's standing on some corner?
- [Steve] Maybe, I don't know.
97
00:05:18,777 --> 00:05:20,946
We're really not going to tell them
what we saw?
98
00:05:22,614 --> 00:05:23,614
[scoffs]
99
00:05:25,784 --> 00:05:26,785
Damn it, Luke.
100
00:05:28,495 --> 00:05:29,496
[sighs angrily]
101
00:05:35,377 --> 00:05:36,419
We going or what?
102
00:05:37,879 --> 00:05:38,880
I just want to help.
103
00:05:41,299 --> 00:05:42,659
[young Steve] I just want to help.
104
00:05:44,261 --> 00:05:45,846
Look, bud, I know you do,
105
00:05:46,012 --> 00:05:48,652
but I'm gonna start using
some really strong chemicals down here...
106
00:05:49,641 --> 00:05:50,809
...and it just isn't safe.
107
00:05:51,393 --> 00:05:52,873
I can help with something else, then.
108
00:05:52,936 --> 00:05:54,354
Look, pal,
109
00:05:55,689 --> 00:05:57,524
I've already hired all the help
I can afford
110
00:05:57,607 --> 00:05:59,888
just to get everything else
finished by the end of summer.
111
00:06:02,571 --> 00:06:04,906
I could use your help
with something, though.
112
00:06:04,990 --> 00:06:06,074
- Yeah?
- Yeah.
113
00:06:07,075 --> 00:06:10,787
See, your mom's going to go
to your Aunt Janet's in a few days
114
00:06:11,329 --> 00:06:12,330
and stay a bit.
115
00:06:12,414 --> 00:06:13,414
Maybe a week.
116
00:06:14,499 --> 00:06:15,499
How come?
117
00:06:16,585 --> 00:06:19,838
Well, you know, she's been cooped up
in this house all summer and...
118
00:06:20,630 --> 00:06:22,591
Anyway, I know it's not
the most exciting thing,
119
00:06:22,674 --> 00:06:25,010
but I could really use your help
120
00:06:25,093 --> 00:06:27,637
watching your brother and your sisters
while she's away.
121
00:06:28,597 --> 00:06:29,597
Yeah.
122
00:06:29,639 --> 00:06:30,640
Yeah, I got you.
123
00:06:31,057 --> 00:06:32,057
Okay.
124
00:06:35,145 --> 00:06:36,521
[chatter]
125
00:06:38,189 --> 00:06:39,941
[hammering]
126
00:07:02,881 --> 00:07:03,881
Mom?
127
00:07:03,965 --> 00:07:05,759
What do you mean, sweetheart?
128
00:07:06,593 --> 00:07:08,511
Of course you're safe with me.
129
00:07:09,346 --> 00:07:10,430
- Mom.
- [gasps]
130
00:07:12,641 --> 00:07:13,641
Are you okay?
131
00:07:15,727 --> 00:07:16,561
Where...
132
00:07:16,645 --> 00:07:17,812
Where are the twins?
133
00:07:18,146 --> 00:07:19,147
Downstairs.
134
00:07:22,150 --> 00:07:23,150
Of course.
135
00:07:23,485 --> 00:07:25,862
- Are you sure...?
- I'm fine, sweetie. I'm fine.
136
00:07:29,115 --> 00:07:30,325
[zapping]
137
00:07:32,160 --> 00:07:33,160
[beeping]
138
00:07:52,514 --> 00:07:53,515
Okay, thanks.
139
00:07:55,016 --> 00:07:57,268
Well, he's... he's not at Holy Family.
140
00:07:57,394 --> 00:07:59,938
We'll, he's probably not going to
instantly OD.
141
00:08:00,105 --> 00:08:03,149
You're going to call every hospital
in Boston? That the plan?
142
00:08:03,233 --> 00:08:06,528
What, you're going to just drive around,
hope we spot him in a city of 700,000...?
143
00:08:06,611 --> 00:08:09,948
I'm not looking for him.
I'm looking for a beat-up green Jeep
144
00:08:10,031 --> 00:08:12,659
with not one, but two Ani DiFranco
bumper stickers,
145
00:08:12,742 --> 00:08:14,822
and I'm looking for it
where I know he used to score.
146
00:08:15,578 --> 00:08:16,830
Gotta do something.
147
00:08:17,580 --> 00:08:18,581
Yeah, we do.
148
00:08:20,542 --> 00:08:21,542
[siren wailing]
149
00:08:21,793 --> 00:08:22,793
So, um...
150
00:08:24,671 --> 00:08:25,755
What's going on?
151
00:08:25,964 --> 00:08:28,174
- Hmm?
- What's going on with you and Leigh?
152
00:08:28,258 --> 00:08:29,300
What do you mean?
153
00:08:29,884 --> 00:08:30,885
Well, I mean...
154
00:08:31,886 --> 00:08:32,887
how's your marriage?
155
00:08:33,388 --> 00:08:35,265
[chuckling] You're kidding, right?
156
00:08:35,348 --> 00:08:36,474
You're not living at home,
157
00:08:36,558 --> 00:08:38,411
and I couldn't help but notice
at the funeral...
158
00:08:38,435 --> 00:08:41,354
- You aren't seriously doing this.
- Well, yeah, I am. I...
159
00:08:41,438 --> 00:08:43,815
Jesus Christ, Dad, you're out of line.
160
00:08:44,024 --> 00:08:47,360
We might be in the car for a while,
and so I thought to myself,
161
00:08:47,444 --> 00:08:50,004
"I'm going to ask my son about his life."
What's wrong with that?
162
00:08:50,030 --> 00:08:51,406
Doesn't work that way, Dad.
163
00:08:54,701 --> 00:08:56,911
Your mom and I were married 15 years.
164
00:08:59,539 --> 00:09:01,374
Together five before that.
165
00:09:04,085 --> 00:09:06,713
She used to say she was the kite
and I was the line.
166
00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:09,966
She was a... creature of the clouds
167
00:09:10,050 --> 00:09:13,136
and... and I was a creature of the earth.
168
00:09:14,471 --> 00:09:17,390
And she'd say that without me
she'd become untethered
169
00:09:17,474 --> 00:09:19,434
and she would float away up into the...
170
00:09:20,351 --> 00:09:22,562
And then without her,
I would just, you know,
171
00:09:22,896 --> 00:09:25,190
crash, just drop right down
to the ground,
172
00:09:25,273 --> 00:09:26,649
and, you know.
173
00:09:26,900 --> 00:09:29,152
But... together...
174
00:09:31,237 --> 00:09:32,238
we...
175
00:09:37,702 --> 00:09:38,953
You know, we separated.
176
00:09:39,579 --> 00:09:41,498
You... You didn't know that, probably.
177
00:09:42,749 --> 00:09:45,251
Briefly, we separated.
You were one year old.
178
00:09:46,002 --> 00:09:47,587
Stupidest thing I ever did.
179
00:09:47,670 --> 00:09:50,256
You know, I made some stupid
proclamation and that was it.
180
00:09:50,340 --> 00:09:51,341
Two weeks.
181
00:09:52,675 --> 00:09:56,179
Two weeks. I don't even know how
we got there. I just know we fought.
182
00:09:56,262 --> 00:10:00,141
I don't know what we fought about,
but I finally came to my senses, and...
183
00:10:02,894 --> 00:10:05,855
I thought, "What the hell,
you stupid asshole. What are you, insane?"
184
00:10:05,980 --> 00:10:08,441
So, you know, I came back
and knocked on the door,
185
00:10:08,525 --> 00:10:10,735
she answered it,
she put her arms around me,
186
00:10:10,860 --> 00:10:13,363
she kissed me,
she forgave me with her eyes, and...
187
00:10:14,823 --> 00:10:15,698
She handed you to me.
188
00:10:15,782 --> 00:10:18,701
I had you in one arm
and her in the other and that was it.
189
00:10:23,081 --> 00:10:24,081
We were back at it.
190
00:10:26,000 --> 00:10:27,460
And Shirley came along and...
191
00:10:29,087 --> 00:10:30,964
from that moment on,
we were on the same team.
192
00:10:31,047 --> 00:10:32,924
You know, we still fought sometimes,
193
00:10:33,675 --> 00:10:34,675
but it was...
194
00:10:34,968 --> 00:10:37,720
it was different. We fought with love.
She taught me that.
195
00:10:38,596 --> 00:10:39,722
You fight with love.
196
00:10:40,056 --> 00:10:41,141
Yeah, when you're...
197
00:10:43,518 --> 00:10:46,312
You're on the same team
even in the middle of a fight.
198
00:10:46,771 --> 00:10:47,771
During the fight,
199
00:10:48,398 --> 00:10:49,941
you're... you're forgiven.
200
00:10:50,150 --> 00:10:52,527
There's no fear. There's no danger.
You're safe.
201
00:10:53,987 --> 00:10:56,781
I hope, really, you get to
experience that sometime.
202
00:10:57,031 --> 00:10:58,031
It's a...
203
00:10:58,491 --> 00:10:59,868
It's a beautiful way to be.
204
00:11:03,246 --> 00:11:05,123
You know, look, we weren't perfect...
205
00:11:07,292 --> 00:11:08,877
but we were always kind.
206
00:11:09,502 --> 00:11:11,963
And we loved each other hard.
207
00:11:13,840 --> 00:11:17,010
And I love her today
just as much as I did in the beginning.
208
00:11:20,638 --> 00:11:21,806
The kite and the line.
209
00:11:26,227 --> 00:11:29,022
So whatever you need to fix
between you and Leigh...
210
00:11:31,232 --> 00:11:32,734
I really hope you do.
211
00:11:36,571 --> 00:11:37,571
And...
212
00:11:39,407 --> 00:11:41,534
That's all I... That's all I really
wanted to say.
213
00:11:45,288 --> 00:11:46,998
[Allie] Candy, candy, candy, candy!
214
00:11:47,749 --> 00:11:49,250
Sure you won't come with us?
215
00:11:49,334 --> 00:11:50,334
You guys have fun.
216
00:11:50,376 --> 00:11:52,170
Come on, Mom, candy!
217
00:11:52,253 --> 00:11:54,672
We'll bring her back some.
Mom's had a very hard day.
218
00:11:55,089 --> 00:11:56,507
Would you stop that?
219
00:11:57,175 --> 00:11:59,510
I'm still disappointed you're not going
as Captain Lame.
220
00:11:59,636 --> 00:12:01,512
[sighs] I swear to God, Dad.
221
00:12:01,596 --> 00:12:03,056
Candy, candy, candy!
222
00:12:03,723 --> 00:12:04,723
Hey.
223
00:12:05,683 --> 00:12:06,893
Can we talk when I get back?
224
00:12:07,977 --> 00:12:10,104
How? You'll be back at the hotel.
225
00:12:11,397 --> 00:12:12,397
Okay.
226
00:12:13,608 --> 00:12:14,608
Okay, Shirl.
227
00:12:16,402 --> 00:12:17,402
Stop.
228
00:12:17,904 --> 00:12:19,572
- Let's go.
- Turn off the porch light.
229
00:12:19,656 --> 00:12:21,658
I can't handle trick-or-treaters tonight.
230
00:12:24,661 --> 00:12:25,661
I love you.
231
00:12:27,080 --> 00:12:28,248
You guys have fun.
232
00:12:59,070 --> 00:13:00,154
What the hell?
233
00:13:01,990 --> 00:13:03,157
[doorbell]
234
00:13:09,914 --> 00:13:11,291
[doorbell]
235
00:13:13,042 --> 00:13:14,544
Sorry, no candy here.
236
00:13:18,548 --> 00:13:19,841
[doorbell]
237
00:13:22,260 --> 00:13:23,720
Goddamn light's off.
238
00:13:30,601 --> 00:13:32,061
[insects chirping]
239
00:13:45,408 --> 00:13:47,201
[Hugh] I'm gonna call the hospitals again.
240
00:13:47,285 --> 00:13:49,704
- Maybe he just forgot his ID.
- And ask them what?
241
00:13:49,787 --> 00:13:51,581
If they've seen a junkie
in a funeral suit?
242
00:13:51,664 --> 00:13:53,958
He's 90 days clean
and he's your brother.
243
00:13:54,042 --> 00:13:55,251
He's a good man, Steve.
244
00:13:55,335 --> 00:13:56,836
They're not mutually exclusive.
245
00:13:56,919 --> 00:13:59,422
He's my brother, but he's a junkie.
246
00:14:02,091 --> 00:14:04,010
We're not going to find him like this.
247
00:14:04,177 --> 00:14:05,777
- You didn't have to come.
- Yeah, I did.
248
00:14:05,803 --> 00:14:07,972
- No, you really didn't.
- Yeah, I did, Steve.
249
00:14:10,391 --> 00:14:12,185
He's my son. You know? My...
250
00:14:12,518 --> 00:14:15,355
I don't know what I'd do
if I lost him, any of you.
251
00:14:18,441 --> 00:14:19,776
Yeah, I had to come.
252
00:14:21,110 --> 00:14:22,945
I can't... I can't lose...
253
00:14:24,197 --> 00:14:25,448
I can't lose anyone else.
254
00:14:28,242 --> 00:14:30,387
One day when you have children,
you'll understand that.
255
00:14:30,411 --> 00:14:32,330
[scoffs] I'm never having children.
256
00:14:33,664 --> 00:14:35,750
Well, that's... that's a shame.
257
00:14:36,834 --> 00:14:39,295
'Cause you kids are the best thing
in my life.
258
00:14:39,504 --> 00:14:41,047
You mean Aunt Janet's life?
259
00:14:41,422 --> 00:14:43,262
She's the one who raised your kids,
didn't she?
260
00:14:43,341 --> 00:14:45,486
- You don't know what it was like.
- You never told me.
261
00:14:45,510 --> 00:14:47,178
Everything I did, I did to protect you.
262
00:14:47,261 --> 00:14:49,055
To protect us, I know, yeah.
263
00:14:49,138 --> 00:14:50,598
Just like you protected Mom.
264
00:14:52,767 --> 00:14:53,767
Here we go.
265
00:14:53,893 --> 00:14:55,436
I saw the police reports.
266
00:14:58,147 --> 00:15:01,818
- Her skull cracked like a melon...
- All right, Steve, why don't you just...?
267
00:15:01,901 --> 00:15:04,654
There was blood all over
the library carpet.
268
00:15:04,946 --> 00:15:07,365
There were bruises on her upper arms
269
00:15:07,448 --> 00:15:09,867
because someone
grabbed her pretty hard.
270
00:15:09,951 --> 00:15:10,868
Okay, Steve...
271
00:15:10,952 --> 00:15:14,622
And a contusion on the back of her head
from being shoved into a wall?
272
00:15:16,040 --> 00:15:18,251
Her ankle was twisted,
so she was limping,
273
00:15:18,334 --> 00:15:20,670
she was bruised to hell,
depressed out of her mind,
274
00:15:20,753 --> 00:15:23,881
unmedicated, untreated,
and abandoned.
275
00:15:23,965 --> 00:15:25,466
It wasn't like that.
276
00:15:25,550 --> 00:15:27,677
I did my best. You have no idea...
277
00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:29,971
You threw us in car,
you left her there alone,
278
00:15:30,054 --> 00:15:32,598
and she threw herself
off the goddamn staircase,
279
00:15:32,682 --> 00:15:33,724
and that was your best?
280
00:15:33,808 --> 00:15:36,453
All right, well, she should not
have been left alone in the house...
281
00:15:36,477 --> 00:15:39,188
Fuck the house. It wasn't the house.
She was sick.
282
00:15:39,772 --> 00:15:42,316
She was sick in her mind,
and the one person,
283
00:15:42,400 --> 00:15:44,777
the one person that was supposed
to take care of her
284
00:15:44,861 --> 00:15:47,738
didn't do a goddamn thing
to get her help.
285
00:15:49,157 --> 00:15:50,199
[sighs]
286
00:15:53,578 --> 00:15:54,578
I miss her.
287
00:15:57,331 --> 00:15:58,583
I miss my mom.
288
00:16:02,628 --> 00:16:03,796
I miss her too.
289
00:16:07,675 --> 00:16:09,719
It's certainly beautiful.
Where did you find it?
290
00:16:11,095 --> 00:16:12,095
The game room.
291
00:16:12,805 --> 00:16:14,348
- The what room?
- Upstairs.
292
00:16:14,432 --> 00:16:17,185
You know, I think a little paint,
maybe fix those doors,
293
00:16:17,268 --> 00:16:19,770
- and she might really love it.
- I'm sure she will.
294
00:16:20,688 --> 00:16:22,815
So do you know
where the paint and stuff is?
295
00:16:22,982 --> 00:16:26,027
- Why don't you ask your father?
- I did. He's busy.
296
00:16:26,152 --> 00:16:28,988
He said if it wasn't tagged for sale,
I could do whatever I wanted.
297
00:16:29,071 --> 00:16:30,573
And it's not tagged for sale.
298
00:16:31,491 --> 00:16:33,743
Well, I do know where some paint is.
299
00:16:38,372 --> 00:16:39,624
I thought so.
300
00:16:40,291 --> 00:16:42,126
This must have been Poppy's.
301
00:16:42,627 --> 00:16:43,627
Poppy?
302
00:16:44,879 --> 00:16:45,922
Poppy Hill.
303
00:16:47,173 --> 00:16:48,591
She was William's wife.
304
00:16:49,550 --> 00:16:50,551
She was insane.
305
00:16:51,260 --> 00:16:53,054
Yeah, she looks kind of wild.
306
00:16:53,513 --> 00:16:54,805
No, I mean clinically.
307
00:16:55,306 --> 00:16:56,306
So was he.
308
00:16:57,391 --> 00:17:00,353
William's parents sent him
to an institution when he was a kid.
309
00:17:00,436 --> 00:17:03,439
They called it private school,
but it wasn't a school, though.
310
00:17:03,523 --> 00:17:06,651
It was just a place where rich parents
hid their embarrassments.
311
00:17:08,194 --> 00:17:10,404
They met in the mental institution.
312
00:17:10,780 --> 00:17:12,532
They fell in love in an asylum.
313
00:17:12,907 --> 00:17:14,283
She was insane.
314
00:17:15,785 --> 00:17:16,786
Did you know her?
315
00:17:18,162 --> 00:17:19,205
Oh, yes.
316
00:17:19,872 --> 00:17:21,832
She was just as crazy, just older.
317
00:17:23,834 --> 00:17:27,755
She was a beautiful young woman
in her time, though.
318
00:17:29,090 --> 00:17:30,341
No doubt about that.
319
00:17:39,183 --> 00:17:41,852
If you really want this to be a surprise
for your mom,
320
00:17:42,603 --> 00:17:44,772
I'd suggest you don't work on it
in your room.
321
00:17:46,816 --> 00:17:48,651
[video game zapping and beeping]
322
00:18:28,774 --> 00:18:30,026
[doorbell]
323
00:18:32,111 --> 00:18:33,446
[breathing deeply]
324
00:18:33,946 --> 00:18:35,281
[doorbell]
325
00:18:38,576 --> 00:18:39,910
[breathing deeply]
326
00:18:43,122 --> 00:18:45,916
Just take the fucking candy and go.
327
00:18:51,756 --> 00:18:52,756
[knocking at door]
328
00:18:53,257 --> 00:18:54,425
[inhales sharply]
329
00:19:06,020 --> 00:19:07,020
[clatter]
330
00:19:07,480 --> 00:19:08,564
You're very clever.
331
00:19:09,607 --> 00:19:11,233
How about you try another house?
332
00:19:11,317 --> 00:19:12,943
I'm not in the fucking mood!
333
00:19:29,043 --> 00:19:30,044
[knocking at door]
334
00:19:38,719 --> 00:19:39,762
[urgent knocking]
335
00:19:40,554 --> 00:19:41,554
[sighs]
336
00:19:44,308 --> 00:19:46,102
What the fuck do you want?
337
00:19:48,312 --> 00:19:49,689
Oh... Oh.
338
00:19:50,773 --> 00:19:52,525
I was just coming to apologize.
339
00:19:54,402 --> 00:19:55,653
Who are you yelling at?
340
00:19:57,571 --> 00:19:58,948
Some fucking kids are...
341
00:20:00,408 --> 00:20:01,408
Forget it.
342
00:20:08,916 --> 00:20:10,251
- Wait.
- Not now.
343
00:20:10,376 --> 00:20:11,919
- I can explain.
- I doubt that.
344
00:20:12,169 --> 00:20:14,731
- Shouldn't you be packing?
- I know what it looked like last night.
345
00:20:14,755 --> 00:20:18,050
- You were making out with my husband.
- No. No, there was no actual...
346
00:20:18,134 --> 00:20:21,303
Okay, so from what I can remember,
which isn't a lot actually,
347
00:20:21,387 --> 00:20:22,304
he pushed me away.
348
00:20:22,388 --> 00:20:24,908
- Is that supposed to make this better?
- If it wasn't even him.
349
00:20:25,099 --> 00:20:28,018
It wasn't... I didn't see him.
It wasn't about him.
350
00:20:28,102 --> 00:20:30,229
It's about you getting out of
my guest house
351
00:20:30,312 --> 00:20:31,564
and off my fucking property.
352
00:20:31,647 --> 00:20:34,817
- If you would just let me talk.
- I don't care what you have to say.
353
00:20:34,900 --> 00:20:37,194
Don't you understand? Get out!
354
00:20:37,278 --> 00:20:38,738
You are impossible.
Do you know that?
355
00:20:38,821 --> 00:20:40,197
I'm sorry, have I offended you?
356
00:20:40,281 --> 00:20:43,042
You are always throwing it in my face
that I live in your guest house.
357
00:20:43,075 --> 00:20:43,993
Won't happen again.
358
00:20:44,076 --> 00:20:45,953
I choose to live there, Shirley.
359
00:20:46,036 --> 00:20:48,956
- With you, for you.
- Oh, I can't thank you enough.
360
00:20:49,039 --> 00:20:50,207
You ice people out.
361
00:20:50,291 --> 00:20:51,208
You always have.
362
00:20:51,292 --> 00:20:52,543
I ice people out?
363
00:20:52,626 --> 00:20:54,003
Have you met yourself?
364
00:20:54,086 --> 00:20:56,714
And so I chose to live there
to help try and keep you warm.
365
00:20:56,797 --> 00:20:58,466
You fucking suck at apologies.
366
00:20:58,549 --> 00:21:02,052
I don't have to live in your guest house.
I'm not some bohemian weirdo.
367
00:21:02,136 --> 00:21:03,220
I'm an adult.
368
00:21:03,345 --> 00:21:04,847
I am a fucking doctor.
369
00:21:04,930 --> 00:21:06,390
You're a fucking slut.
370
00:21:08,017 --> 00:21:09,226
I just need you to know
371
00:21:09,727 --> 00:21:11,913
that it wasn't Kevin's fault
and he didn't do anything...
372
00:21:11,937 --> 00:21:14,231
Don't you fucking dare
defend my husband.
373
00:21:14,315 --> 00:21:16,942
All of us, all of us are just always
helping you
374
00:21:17,026 --> 00:21:19,820
keep up this idea in your head
that you're perfect Shirley,
375
00:21:19,904 --> 00:21:21,864
and we're just a bunch
of fuck-ups fucking up.
376
00:21:21,947 --> 00:21:24,283
- Perfect Shirley's perfect fucking...
- Out!
377
00:21:24,825 --> 00:21:25,743
No!
378
00:21:25,826 --> 00:21:28,078
You do not just get to shut me
out of your...
379
00:21:32,917 --> 00:21:34,627
Did you just punch me in the boob?
380
00:21:36,504 --> 00:21:37,504
Yeah.
381
00:21:38,547 --> 00:21:39,547
Yeah!
382
00:21:40,174 --> 00:21:42,218
If you kiss my husband,
that's what you get.
383
00:21:42,301 --> 00:21:44,386
You get punched
in the fucking boob.
384
00:21:45,012 --> 00:21:45,930
And you get evicted
385
00:21:46,013 --> 00:21:47,773
- from my fucking house.
- [knocking at door]
386
00:21:50,100 --> 00:21:51,393
[pounding at door]
387
00:22:05,407 --> 00:22:06,742
[pounding at door]
388
00:22:08,536 --> 00:22:09,745
[knocking at window]
389
00:22:12,915 --> 00:22:14,208
[banging at window]
390
00:22:16,585 --> 00:22:18,337
[rhythmic banging at window]
391
00:22:19,129 --> 00:22:21,298
[loud banging at door and windows]
392
00:22:23,551 --> 00:22:25,052
[crashing at door]
393
00:22:29,640 --> 00:22:30,640
[banging stops]
394
00:22:40,818 --> 00:22:41,861
[cell phone rings]
395
00:22:51,620 --> 00:22:52,788
[car horn blaring]
396
00:22:54,665 --> 00:22:56,083
[cell phone rings]
397
00:22:57,376 --> 00:22:58,376
Shirl?
398
00:22:59,003 --> 00:23:00,045
What's up?
399
00:23:00,880 --> 00:23:01,880
They...
400
00:23:04,258 --> 00:23:05,258
Sorry, they...
401
00:23:06,886 --> 00:23:07,928
They got a hit.
402
00:23:09,263 --> 00:23:11,765
He used the card at a gas station.
403
00:23:12,850 --> 00:23:14,643
202, just east of Amherst.
404
00:23:15,936 --> 00:23:16,936
Amherst?
405
00:23:17,104 --> 00:23:17,938
Um...
406
00:23:18,105 --> 00:23:19,815
Can you text me the address?
407
00:23:23,235 --> 00:23:24,612
- Shirl?
- Yeah.
408
00:23:24,904 --> 00:23:25,946
I'm here.Sorry.
409
00:23:27,907 --> 00:23:30,034
Yeah, I'll... I'll text you the address.
410
00:23:31,118 --> 00:23:33,829
- Amherst is on the way...
- [Hugh] Yeah, I know where it is.
411
00:23:33,913 --> 00:23:36,248
You guys are gonna stay there,
we're gonna go to Amherst.
412
00:23:36,332 --> 00:23:39,668
I'm saying, if he's stopping in Amherst,
he's heading...
413
00:23:39,752 --> 00:23:41,837
Shirley, listen to me,
you're gonna stay put.
414
00:23:41,921 --> 00:23:43,756
- You hear me?
- Tell them what happened.
415
00:23:44,798 --> 00:23:46,342
Tell them what just happened.
416
00:23:47,885 --> 00:23:49,011
I'll text you.
417
00:23:50,846 --> 00:23:53,432
Some fucking kids playing a prank
is what happened.
418
00:23:53,515 --> 00:23:54,516
You know it wasn't.
419
00:23:55,184 --> 00:23:56,184
You know that.
420
00:23:57,519 --> 00:24:00,731
That's not the only thing like that
that's happened here tonight.
421
00:24:04,985 --> 00:24:07,446
I think Luke is going to the house.
422
00:24:08,405 --> 00:24:09,740
[Steve] Of course he is.
423
00:24:10,449 --> 00:24:12,409
The goddamn house.
424
00:24:12,993 --> 00:24:16,121
It was a good enough spot for Nell,
it's a good enough spot for Luke.
425
00:24:16,205 --> 00:24:18,582
He always wanted to do what she did
his whole life.
426
00:24:18,666 --> 00:24:19,917
- You think you know.
- Uh-huh.
427
00:24:20,000 --> 00:24:21,919
And you just don't,
you don't understand.
428
00:24:22,002 --> 00:24:23,837
Last time I saw Mom,
429
00:24:24,588 --> 00:24:25,881
the look in her eye,
430
00:24:26,298 --> 00:24:27,383
I've seen that look.
431
00:24:27,800 --> 00:24:30,928
And Nell over the years, and Luke,
from the start,
432
00:24:31,011 --> 00:24:34,515
from when he'd sit there
drawing crazy ghouls in his treehouse,
433
00:24:34,598 --> 00:24:37,017
and, hell, I've seen that look
in the mirror.
434
00:24:39,353 --> 00:24:41,855
Our family has a disease
that's never been treated,
435
00:24:41,939 --> 00:24:44,483
because it was easier
to listen to your crazy stories
436
00:24:44,566 --> 00:24:45,609
about an evil house.
437
00:24:48,112 --> 00:24:51,257
You think you saw it in the mirror? That's
why you think you'll never have kids?
438
00:24:51,281 --> 00:24:52,825
Oh, I know I'm never having children.
439
00:24:52,908 --> 00:24:56,078
Because you think that they'll
just have the same imaginary sickness?
440
00:24:56,161 --> 00:24:58,205
They would. We all do.
441
00:24:58,288 --> 00:25:00,666
Nell was delusional, depressed,
442
00:25:00,749 --> 00:25:03,669
Luke's an addict,
Shirley is a control freak,
443
00:25:03,752 --> 00:25:06,630
and Theo's basically
a clenched fist with hair.
444
00:25:07,464 --> 00:25:10,259
The whole fucking family
is on the brink of a breakdown
445
00:25:10,342 --> 00:25:13,512
and seeing things that aren't there,
hearing things that aren't there,
446
00:25:13,595 --> 00:25:16,056
and that shit happened after the house.
447
00:25:16,140 --> 00:25:17,307
It's not the house.
448
00:25:17,391 --> 00:25:20,019
There's something wrong
with our goddamn brains.
449
00:25:20,394 --> 00:25:22,146
So yeah, I'm never having children.
450
00:25:23,605 --> 00:25:24,648
I made sure.
451
00:25:28,360 --> 00:25:29,360
A vasectomy.
452
00:25:31,739 --> 00:25:32,740
Right out of college.
453
00:25:34,199 --> 00:25:37,286
And it was the right call, believe me,
because if I ever doubted it,
454
00:25:37,369 --> 00:25:40,456
some of the bullshit
I've been hallucinating this week...
455
00:25:43,042 --> 00:25:44,042
You really did?
456
00:25:45,085 --> 00:25:46,085
Yeah.
457
00:25:48,505 --> 00:25:49,798
Before you met Leigh?
458
00:25:52,426 --> 00:25:53,552
[Hugh sighs deeply]
459
00:25:53,969 --> 00:25:54,969
Boy.
460
00:25:56,805 --> 00:25:57,806
You didn't tell her?
461
00:25:59,600 --> 00:26:00,684
You didn't tell her.
462
00:26:02,227 --> 00:26:03,227
No.
463
00:26:05,481 --> 00:26:07,024
She wanted kids, I knew that.
464
00:26:08,025 --> 00:26:10,944
I kept thinking, "I'll tell her later,
now's not the time."
465
00:26:13,614 --> 00:26:16,158
But then we were engaged,
and then we were married,
466
00:26:16,241 --> 00:26:19,453
and then we were trying and she
was so upset it wasn't working.
467
00:26:22,831 --> 00:26:24,124
I couldn't say.
468
00:26:24,708 --> 00:26:26,543
I can't. My genes.
469
00:26:27,377 --> 00:26:30,047
"My... My genes are rotten, Leigh."
470
00:26:30,881 --> 00:26:31,882
So I... I...
471
00:26:34,635 --> 00:26:35,886
I didn't tell her.
472
00:26:37,221 --> 00:26:40,516
And I thought I was being kind,
I really thought that.
473
00:26:43,185 --> 00:26:44,853
See, we're all fucking crazy.
474
00:26:46,396 --> 00:26:47,648
The crazy Crains.
475
00:26:49,608 --> 00:26:53,195
This sickness already killed two of us,
might kill a third tonight.
476
00:26:53,612 --> 00:26:54,613
That's...
477
00:26:55,614 --> 00:26:56,698
almost half.
478
00:26:58,909 --> 00:27:00,244
Be almost half of us.
479
00:27:02,079 --> 00:27:03,122
[sighs]
480
00:27:03,914 --> 00:27:06,875
So, you want to tell me more
about the kite and the line?
481
00:27:09,169 --> 00:27:10,169
Or just...
482
00:27:11,171 --> 00:27:13,298
Just tell me what a shitty husband I was.
483
00:27:13,966 --> 00:27:14,967
Go ahead.
484
00:27:18,011 --> 00:27:19,096
I'm so sorry.
485
00:27:20,347 --> 00:27:21,347
I'm just...
486
00:27:24,810 --> 00:27:26,061
I'm just so sorry, son.
487
00:27:28,105 --> 00:27:29,148
[Olivia] You did this?
488
00:27:29,731 --> 00:27:31,859
This is beautiful.
You did this by yourself?
489
00:27:32,317 --> 00:27:33,944
Thought it might cheer you up.
490
00:27:34,403 --> 00:27:35,737
Dad said you've been...
491
00:27:36,697 --> 00:27:38,574
What? What did he say?
492
00:27:38,699 --> 00:27:40,242
I'm... I just...
493
00:27:40,325 --> 00:27:42,411
I know you're taking a little vacation.
494
00:27:42,494 --> 00:27:44,037
I wanted to cheer you up.
495
00:27:46,081 --> 00:27:47,081
Oh, sweetie.
496
00:27:48,709 --> 00:27:50,502
How long are you going to be gone?
497
00:27:50,627 --> 00:27:51,837
Oh, not long.
498
00:27:52,129 --> 00:27:53,172
Not long, honey.
499
00:27:53,797 --> 00:27:56,758
I just need a little time away.
It's nothing more than that, okay?
500
00:27:57,301 --> 00:27:58,301
Okay.
501
00:27:59,887 --> 00:28:01,054
This is perfect.
502
00:28:02,806 --> 00:28:04,892
Thank you. Thank you! I love it.
503
00:28:09,646 --> 00:28:10,731
[panting]
504
00:28:12,024 --> 00:28:13,024
Mom?
505
00:28:14,276 --> 00:28:15,402
[grunts]
506
00:28:20,866 --> 00:28:22,034
Oh, baby.
507
00:28:24,161 --> 00:28:25,287
Oh, I'm so sorry.
508
00:28:26,288 --> 00:28:29,082
This is an older picture.
He would have been wearing a suit.
509
00:28:29,166 --> 00:28:31,752
- About an hour ago. Did he come in?
- Yeah, I think so.
510
00:28:31,835 --> 00:28:32,669
Yeah?
511
00:28:32,753 --> 00:28:34,922
Did he say anything weird
or do anything...?
512
00:28:35,005 --> 00:28:36,256
He filled up his Jeep.
513
00:28:36,632 --> 00:28:38,091
- Green Jeep?
- That's right.
514
00:28:38,175 --> 00:28:40,844
And then he filled up some cans,
like, five cans.
515
00:28:41,595 --> 00:28:43,138
Five cans, you say?
516
00:28:55,525 --> 00:28:56,818
- Was it him?
- Yeah.
517
00:28:57,986 --> 00:28:59,071
What are you doing?
518
00:28:59,404 --> 00:29:01,365
- I'm driving.
- No, this...
519
00:29:01,448 --> 00:29:02,574
This is my rental.
520
00:29:05,619 --> 00:29:06,787
[engine revs]
521
00:29:08,872 --> 00:29:10,582
Jesus, Dad, slow down.
522
00:29:10,666 --> 00:29:13,186
He bought five cans of gasoline.
He's not going to kill himself,
523
00:29:13,252 --> 00:29:15,412
- he's going to burn the house down.
- That's a relief.
524
00:29:15,462 --> 00:29:17,756
He's in more danger now
than he's ever been,
525
00:29:17,839 --> 00:29:20,217
and if he tries to burn it,
it will defend itself.
526
00:29:20,300 --> 00:29:23,420
- You really didn't hear a word I said.
- I did. Now you're gonna listen to me.
527
00:29:24,721 --> 00:29:26,223
There's a lot you don't know.
528
00:29:27,349 --> 00:29:30,644
I thought I could keep you kids safe
if you didn't know, but for 20 years
529
00:29:30,727 --> 00:29:33,373
I've been holding the door closed,
'cause I knew there were monsters
530
00:29:33,397 --> 00:29:35,065
on the other side,
do you understand me?
531
00:29:35,148 --> 00:29:36,400
Not even a little.
532
00:29:36,483 --> 00:29:39,861
Our family is like an unfinished meal
to that house,
533
00:29:39,945 --> 00:29:42,489
and your brother is walking
right back into...
534
00:29:43,991 --> 00:29:48,328
That house is the most dangerous place
in the world for all of us,
535
00:29:49,204 --> 00:29:50,747
but especially for you.
536
00:29:51,206 --> 00:29:52,541
- For me?
- Yeah, you.
537
00:29:53,208 --> 00:29:54,126
What? Why?
538
00:29:54,209 --> 00:29:55,877
Because I read your book,
539
00:29:55,961 --> 00:29:59,673
and you are the last person that
should ever step foot in that house
540
00:29:59,756 --> 00:30:02,259
because of what you wrote
and how you wrote it.
541
00:30:02,592 --> 00:30:05,012
You think you know what you saw?
542
00:30:05,262 --> 00:30:08,265
- You think you know what you wrote?
- What?
543
00:30:09,182 --> 00:30:10,684
I know you saw a ghost.
544
00:30:11,476 --> 00:30:13,353
- [scoffs]
- Yeah, chapter 19.
545
00:30:13,562 --> 00:30:14,396
Yeah.
546
00:30:14,479 --> 00:30:17,441
That little story about the vanity
you painted for your mother.
547
00:30:17,524 --> 00:30:19,943
That's a story about a schizophrenic woman
548
00:30:20,027 --> 00:30:21,945
having a manic episode
in front of a mirror.
549
00:30:22,029 --> 00:30:23,613
You don't understand what you wrote...
550
00:30:23,697 --> 00:30:26,408
No, I saw Mom smash that glass
551
00:30:26,491 --> 00:30:28,035
- for no reason.
- Before that.
552
00:30:28,118 --> 00:30:29,995
Go to the beginning,
that little bit,
553
00:30:30,203 --> 00:30:31,997
about the vanity and why you did it.
554
00:30:32,080 --> 00:30:34,291
- You found the vanity in the game room.
- Uh-huh.
555
00:30:34,374 --> 00:30:36,585
And you walked by the man
repairing the clock,
556
00:30:36,668 --> 00:30:38,962
and then you saw your mother
looking into the twins' room,
557
00:30:39,046 --> 00:30:40,297
staring at their empty beds.
558
00:30:40,380 --> 00:30:43,050
Textbook dissociative episode.
She was not well.
559
00:30:43,133 --> 00:30:44,426
No, no, not her.
560
00:30:44,509 --> 00:30:46,303
The man repairing the clock.
561
00:30:47,596 --> 00:30:48,596
What about him?
562
00:30:49,264 --> 00:30:51,516
Do you know what "witness marks" are?
563
00:30:52,809 --> 00:30:53,852
They're scars.
564
00:30:54,561 --> 00:30:56,438
Little marks inside the clock,
565
00:30:56,521 --> 00:30:58,440
scrapes, lines, divots,
566
00:30:58,523 --> 00:31:00,275
from tools, gears,
567
00:31:00,650 --> 00:31:02,569
pieces removed from the clock.
568
00:31:02,652 --> 00:31:05,864
They're basically evidence of repairs
that have been done to the clock
569
00:31:05,947 --> 00:31:07,240
and what the clock was.
570
00:31:07,949 --> 00:31:09,826
And with antique clocks,
571
00:31:09,910 --> 00:31:11,620
you almost never have a repair record,
572
00:31:11,703 --> 00:31:14,206
so you have to learn how to read
the witness marks,
573
00:31:14,289 --> 00:31:16,291
so you can understand
what was done to the machine
574
00:31:16,375 --> 00:31:18,168
and how it's meant to function.
575
00:31:19,127 --> 00:31:21,588
Witness marks tell the story of the piece,
576
00:31:21,838 --> 00:31:23,465
if you know how to read them.
577
00:31:23,548 --> 00:31:25,133
What are you trying to say?
578
00:31:25,425 --> 00:31:27,803
I had that clock evaluated
by a professional
579
00:31:27,886 --> 00:31:29,721
before we even moved into the house.
580
00:31:30,097 --> 00:31:34,059
I just wanted to know its history,
know its value.
581
00:31:34,643 --> 00:31:36,812
That clock hadn't been touched
since the '60s.
582
00:31:37,270 --> 00:31:39,815
You hired a slew of workers
toward the end...
583
00:31:39,898 --> 00:31:41,858
Not for that clock, I didn't. Uh-uh.
584
00:31:44,027 --> 00:31:46,029
No, and if I had, it would have
taken a specialist.
585
00:31:46,113 --> 00:31:48,633
There's only a handful in the world
who know how to do it right,
586
00:31:48,657 --> 00:31:49,699
and they take it off-site.
587
00:31:50,200 --> 00:31:52,452
No. No one touched that clock.
There was no man there,
588
00:31:52,536 --> 00:31:56,164
and certainly not one in old overalls
with a handlebar mustache.
589
00:31:56,248 --> 00:31:58,083
That man wasn't there.
590
00:31:59,292 --> 00:32:00,460
You probably just forgot.
591
00:32:00,544 --> 00:32:03,046
You know, you think you're writing
about your crazy mom,
592
00:32:03,130 --> 00:32:05,757
your crazy brother
making scary faces in the treehouse.
593
00:32:05,841 --> 00:32:08,468
You see the marks,
but you don't know how to read them.
594
00:32:09,428 --> 00:32:12,180
I never built you kids a treehouse.
595
00:32:13,181 --> 00:32:14,933
What? Luke was in there all the time.
596
00:32:15,016 --> 00:32:18,103
- I used to go fetch him for dinner...
- We were there flipping a house.
597
00:32:18,186 --> 00:32:20,480
We were gonna be there maybe eight weeks.
598
00:32:20,564 --> 00:32:24,109
How would I even have the time to build
you kids a goddamn treehouse?
599
00:32:24,192 --> 00:32:26,945
- Maybe it was already there.
- There was no treehouse.
600
00:32:29,072 --> 00:32:30,792
Now, when we get there,
you can have a look,
601
00:32:30,824 --> 00:32:33,660
but I have to tell you something:
your mother, she was not sick.
602
00:32:34,286 --> 00:32:36,746
She wasn't crazy,
and neither was your sister,
603
00:32:36,830 --> 00:32:38,957
neither is your brother,
neither are you.
604
00:32:39,040 --> 00:32:40,792
Whatever you saw this week,
605
00:32:40,876 --> 00:32:43,795
and I'm very sorry you have to be
taking all this in right now,
606
00:32:43,879 --> 00:32:44,754
but you have to.
607
00:32:44,838 --> 00:32:46,298
Do you understand me?
You have to,
608
00:32:46,381 --> 00:32:49,342
because your brother's life
depends on it.
609
00:32:50,051 --> 00:32:53,388
That house is the most dangerous place
in the world for all of us,
610
00:32:53,680 --> 00:32:56,391
and that's why I told your sisters
to stay put.
611
00:32:58,435 --> 00:32:59,811
You really think they will?
612
00:33:05,358 --> 00:33:06,485
Do you think he's...?
613
00:33:08,320 --> 00:33:09,320
You know...
614
00:33:10,864 --> 00:33:13,116
going there like Nell went there?
615
00:33:13,533 --> 00:33:14,910
Like going to kill himself?
616
00:33:16,244 --> 00:33:17,244
I don't know.
617
00:33:19,706 --> 00:33:20,706
No.
618
00:33:20,874 --> 00:33:21,958
I guess I don't.
619
00:33:24,211 --> 00:33:26,087
I'm not perfect, you know.
620
00:33:27,589 --> 00:33:28,589
I know.
621
00:33:29,674 --> 00:33:30,674
I'm really not.
622
00:33:32,010 --> 00:33:33,595
So go ahead, tell me.
623
00:33:35,180 --> 00:33:36,180
Try again.
624
00:33:39,392 --> 00:33:41,228
Dad and I were in your office,
625
00:33:41,311 --> 00:33:44,189
and the forever house
was on the floor,
626
00:33:44,773 --> 00:33:46,483
and we heard a noise under the desk...
627
00:33:46,566 --> 00:33:48,401
Not that. You already told me that.
628
00:33:50,278 --> 00:33:51,571
I was really drunk.
629
00:33:52,364 --> 00:33:54,783
- Swear to God, Theo...
- And the lights went out
630
00:33:55,784 --> 00:33:57,744
while we were down there, and I...
631
00:33:59,162 --> 00:34:01,623
couldn't see. I was in the dark.
632
00:34:02,916 --> 00:34:05,043
I mean, like I was in the dark
633
00:34:05,710 --> 00:34:08,171
that whole night, and I just needed...
634
00:34:08,255 --> 00:34:09,756
I... I needed...
635
00:34:12,175 --> 00:34:13,510
I couldn't see
636
00:34:14,052 --> 00:34:15,052
him,
637
00:34:15,178 --> 00:34:16,555
if that makes any sense.
638
00:34:16,680 --> 00:34:18,390
You know what? Never mind.
639
00:34:18,890 --> 00:34:21,518
- I'm trying to tell you...
- Forget I asked.
640
00:34:21,601 --> 00:34:23,937
You just don't know what I'm dealing with.
641
00:34:24,020 --> 00:34:25,313
We've all been dealing,
642
00:34:25,397 --> 00:34:28,316
and we somehow managed
not to try to fuck each other's spouses...
643
00:34:28,400 --> 00:34:30,819
Hey, that's not what this was about.
It just isn't.
644
00:34:30,902 --> 00:34:33,196
So, you were drunk,
645
00:34:33,280 --> 00:34:35,574
- and that's supposed to be okay?
- I'm telling you.
646
00:34:36,408 --> 00:34:38,743
I don't even know why
I let you come with me.
647
00:34:39,911 --> 00:34:42,789
I touched Nell's body the night before.
648
00:34:43,415 --> 00:34:44,833
The fuck is wrong with you?
649
00:34:46,668 --> 00:34:47,961
Why don't you listen?
650
00:34:48,044 --> 00:34:49,754
- I don't...
- I'm telling you.
651
00:34:49,838 --> 00:34:52,924
- I'm trying to tell you.
- I don't need to hear your excuses...
652
00:34:53,008 --> 00:34:54,860
- I'm not making excuses.
- ...or your bullshit.
653
00:34:54,884 --> 00:34:55,760
I saw...
654
00:34:55,844 --> 00:34:56,844
[screaming]
655
00:35:10,900 --> 00:35:12,235
[Theo wails]
656
00:35:16,573 --> 00:35:17,573
Are you okay?
657
00:35:17,616 --> 00:35:18,742
That was her!
658
00:35:18,825 --> 00:35:21,745
That was her! That was her!
659
00:35:22,162 --> 00:35:24,039
Did you see that, Shirley?
660
00:35:24,122 --> 00:35:26,124
Do you fucking believe that?
661
00:35:30,378 --> 00:35:32,005
You ought to know why I did it.
662
00:35:33,173 --> 00:35:35,383
I touched Nell because I had to know.
663
00:35:36,301 --> 00:35:37,927
You know what I'm talking about.
664
00:35:38,011 --> 00:35:39,471
Don't pretend that you don't.
665
00:35:40,472 --> 00:35:42,641
You know what happens
when I touch people.
666
00:35:42,724 --> 00:35:44,726
A part of you knows, it always has.
667
00:35:46,853 --> 00:35:48,355
I had to know and I...
668
00:35:49,564 --> 00:35:50,565
I touched her.
669
00:35:51,608 --> 00:35:52,608
And I felt...
670
00:35:53,943 --> 00:35:54,943
nothing.
671
00:35:56,571 --> 00:35:58,073
Just nothing.
672
00:35:59,574 --> 00:36:02,285
And it spread,
it spread everywhere in me,
673
00:36:02,369 --> 00:36:05,497
this nothing, until I couldn't
feel anything anymore.
674
00:36:05,580 --> 00:36:07,123
I was just this dark,
675
00:36:07,624 --> 00:36:09,334
empty black hole.
676
00:36:09,834 --> 00:36:12,128
And I tried to fill it up,
I tried to fill me back up,
677
00:36:12,212 --> 00:36:15,423
and I called Trish and she came right away
and I felt nothing.
678
00:36:15,548 --> 00:36:18,468
And then I tried to mourn at the wake
and I felt nothing,
679
00:36:18,551 --> 00:36:21,930
and so I drank and I drank,
and nothing worked.
680
00:36:22,013 --> 00:36:24,140
I couldn't feel anything, Shirley.
681
00:36:24,224 --> 00:36:27,560
After I touched her skin,
I couldn't feel...
682
00:36:28,728 --> 00:36:29,896
anything.
683
00:36:30,647 --> 00:36:33,733
And then we're in the basement
and the lights go out.
684
00:36:35,151 --> 00:36:36,444
And I can't see.
685
00:36:37,112 --> 00:36:38,446
And I can't feel.
686
00:36:39,489 --> 00:36:43,660
And I'm just... I'm just floating
in this ocean of nothing,
687
00:36:43,743 --> 00:36:46,371
and I wonder if this is it,
if this is what death is,
688
00:36:46,454 --> 00:36:50,417
just out there in the darkness,
just darkness and numbness and alone,
689
00:36:50,500 --> 00:36:54,379
and I wondered if that's what she felt
and that's what Mom feels,
690
00:36:54,462 --> 00:36:58,341
and it's just numb and nothing and alone.
691
00:37:02,095 --> 00:37:04,848
What if that's what it is for all of us
692
00:37:05,890 --> 00:37:07,100
when the time comes?
693
00:37:09,811 --> 00:37:12,647
And then the lights came on
and there he was, and I...
694
00:37:13,231 --> 00:37:15,275
I didn't see him. I didn't see him.
695
00:37:15,358 --> 00:37:17,193
He was the light in the darkness.
696
00:37:17,277 --> 00:37:19,904
He was a life preserver in the ocean.
697
00:37:19,988 --> 00:37:23,324
I just... I reached for him
because I had to feel something.
698
00:37:23,408 --> 00:37:24,659
I had to feel anything.
699
00:37:25,994 --> 00:37:27,746
And I didn't see him.
700
00:37:28,163 --> 00:37:30,415
I didn't... I didn't see him.
I didn't see him.
701
00:37:30,623 --> 00:37:31,624
I didn't see him!
702
00:37:31,708 --> 00:37:33,209
And he stopped me. He stopped me.
703
00:37:33,293 --> 00:37:35,086
He took my hands, and he said no,
704
00:37:35,170 --> 00:37:37,547
and then I saw him,
and then you walked in.
705
00:37:39,007 --> 00:37:41,217
God, I'm so glad I did it, though.
706
00:37:42,677 --> 00:37:43,928
Because it worked.
707
00:37:44,846 --> 00:37:46,389
Oh, God, it worked.
708
00:37:46,890 --> 00:37:48,433
I started feeling things again,
709
00:37:48,516 --> 00:37:51,603
and I felt... I felt shame,
and I felt grief,
710
00:37:51,686 --> 00:37:53,897
and I felt... scared.
711
00:37:53,980 --> 00:37:55,648
I felt so fucking scared
712
00:37:55,732 --> 00:37:58,568
that I was gonna lose
the only sister that I had left.
713
00:38:00,612 --> 00:38:01,612
And I...
714
00:38:01,905 --> 00:38:05,408
Honestly, I had to do it,
because it felt better than nothing.
715
00:38:05,533 --> 00:38:08,620
That thorough fucking shame
716
00:38:08,995 --> 00:38:12,999
was so much better than that horrible,
empty nothing.
717
00:38:13,082 --> 00:38:15,752
I can't... Shirley, please.
718
00:38:18,213 --> 00:38:20,381
I am... I am so...
719
00:38:20,465 --> 00:38:22,091
I am so, so, so sorry.
720
00:38:22,884 --> 00:38:24,135
I'm so sorry.
721
00:38:25,053 --> 00:38:27,055
Please, just please.
722
00:38:32,435 --> 00:38:33,603
[Theo sniffs]
723
00:38:50,161 --> 00:38:51,788
[insects chirping]
724
00:39:33,079 --> 00:39:34,539
[liquid trickling]
725
00:40:04,319 --> 00:40:06,654
One, two, three, four,
726
00:40:06,779 --> 00:40:08,406
five, six, seven.
727
00:40:13,244 --> 00:40:14,537
[breathing hard]
728
00:40:14,829 --> 00:40:15,829
One,
729
00:40:16,039 --> 00:40:17,832
two, three,
730
00:40:18,374 --> 00:40:20,043
four, five,
731
00:40:20,543 --> 00:40:21,543
six...
732
00:40:22,128 --> 00:40:23,546
[breathing hard]
733
00:40:57,246 --> 00:40:58,246
Mom.
734
00:40:59,305 --> 00:41:05,918
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