All language subtitles for Garazh 2

Comrades, comrades!
We continue!

We have a letter from preschool #8,
objecting to the garages
being built where children are.

Inspectors visited.

Unexpected expenses arose
in the form of refreshments.

You understand,
one cannot do without that.

Next. In the night, residents
Of the neighboring building...

...planted some fast-growing
trees on our construction site,

And in the morning, they telegraphed
the Executive Council, saying that we

...are destroying the neighborhood
greenery.

THANK GOD, 11 of the trees
didn�t take root.

Again the inspectors came.

But we were prepared.

3 remaining trees were,
smeared with fuel oil.

We had to pay a fine for the
3 trees that perished.

But we defended our lot with success.

We got great assistance from comrade
Miloserdov [Compassion-ov] personally.

As such, we again make the
deadline for passing the construction

...this year.

This means, garage will get approval
in the 2nd quarter of next year.

But we will sign the act of approval
dating this year.

That way the building trust
will get their completion bonuses.

But that concerns them.

Two acts of arson were committed.

The first to burn down was the
workers� tool shed with their tools.

Next, the wooden fence went ablaze,
but we caught just in the knick time�

...the arsonist.

She turned out to be a mother
with many kids. She was released.

During construction,
the telephone wire got damaged.

Residents of those homes
which lost phone connection

...tried to hard members of the
board physically.

Once again, unexpected costs
came up.

We decided to reimburse the
cost of a coat belonging to one

...member of the board,
that got destroyed in the process.

I mean the jacked,
not the board member.

At the present time,
the cable has been repaired.

Construction workers took
extra responsibilities on themselves.

...but last week�

...the brigade once again failed
to show up to the work site.

It was temporarily moved to
an emergency repair site.

That emergency, unfortunately,
got drawn out.

But yesterday we got our
workers back.

So things are going not bad.

And that�s basically all.

Comrades, who votes yes?

Yes for what?

Who votes yes to recognize the
work of the board of

the �Fauna� co-operative to be
satisfactory?

Why satisfactory?

It should be recognized as �good�.

That�s right. Lots of hard work got put in.
Can be recognized as �good�:

Good work!

Get on with it, let�s recognize it
as wonderful and everyone can go home!

Comrades, we cannot have
�good work�.

It�s either �satisfactory� or
�unsatisfactory�.

Who votes for �satisfactory�?

Adopted unanimously.
Big thanks on behalf of the board.

Permission to leave?

The assembly is not yet
adjourned.

Alla Petrovna, the secretary,
has the floor.

Please be seated, comrades.

The board is requesting to
hear out the report

about the board�s
financial activities.

Your babe showed up.

She got some nerve.
Now she attends these assemblies.

Good evening,
So how long can you convene in here?

Why did you come?

For an urgent matter.

Let�s go chat behind the white bear?

You�re making me
look kinda bad.

The whole institute knows
about your sick liver. Now eat.

I�m not talking of that liver now.

Then what?

You know full well what.

I don�t get it.

There�s so many people here,
and everyone sees everything.

See what?

Natasha,
quit fooling around!

The entire institute knows of
our relationship.

I have to worry about my reputation.

I�m a woman.

Why are you shivering?

You�re a single,
free man.

All our expenses were made
according to our estimates.

But, comrades, we have
some expenses over the limit.

The putty, for instance.

In the sum of $55,
which is now hanging on us.

What a nightmare,
when will this end?

My rascal is locked in the house
all alone.

How old is the boy?

Already 7.

By the time we get out of here,
he�ll turn 8.

Could be 10.

Aren�t you afraid to leave him
home alone?

No, not at all.

He�s used to being home alone.

Quite an independent young man.

I took the time to stop over
and feed him.

The board is asking to approve
the financial report.

Who votes yes? Comrades,
please vote.

Wonderful. Thank you.

Just one more small,
but rather big question.

Life is so full of questions!

One wishes it contained
only answers.

Certainly, positive ones.

Yes.

But not from you.

So, I�m starting off with
a negative answer.

Can you imagine, I managed to get
chicken, fish and ham.

I understand that chicken
is a very important thing.

But I request silence.

Sorry, but still...

Comrades, this question is
a very delicate one.

In some ways, a very
upsetting one.

Me personally, it kills me.

My dears, our project includes
33 garage slots.

Which is why we have 32 shareholders.

One garage was allocated as a
place for car repair.

You must know that the city adopted
a general reconstruction plan
for our area.

It spans right up to the boarder
to our construction site

...they�re putting a highway there.

It will encroach on one
portion of our land lot.

Which is why the number of our
garage spots got reduced by 5.

Can�t they move the highway over?

Comrades, we tried to convince them
to leave our lot untouched.

But you grasp the issue here.
It�s a highway.

It�s a straight line.

The only solution is to
reduce the number of

...shareholders by 5 people.

God knows what
will start now.

We called an emergency
board meeting.

We decided to make do
without the repair-garage.

Main thing for us is �people!
Not cars.

We�ll have to cut only
4 people, and not 5.

Four is better than five

But worse than three.

We weighed each candidacy
meticulously.

We took everything into
consideration.

We reviewed who
contributed money and when.

Who helped out with construction.

Who took trips to petition
different organizations.

Who sacrificed their
Saturdays for urban renewal.

Who stood guard in the nights.

And now I will read the list
of people whom�

...we propose to exclude.

What�s all the sweet talk?
Business is business.

To exclude � unfortunately.

And immediately place
on our next list,

...on our reserve list. We will fight
for a second quieu.

Someone can forfeit their
share voluntarily,

or forfeit their life.
Life is life.

Comrades! This list received
consent from the directors

...and the insitute�s social
organizations.

Ok.

I�m about to get the boot.

I have two garages for my one family.

Therefore, I read this list with
pain in my heart.

Read it.

With pain in my heart
I am reading it.

Read it!

Khvostov,
Simon Aleksandrovich.

We all fought hard for
comrade Khvostov,

...tried to keep him on.

But our efforts also have
limits, comrades.

Number two.
Gus�kov, Evgeny Ivanovich.

We all feel great sympathy
for him.

How Guskov?

Why Guskov?

I knew it.

I will not let you
torment my husband!

Guskov�s wife, don�t get upset!

Don�t make a scene!

Guskov is a well-known scapegoat
in our institute.

He makes discoveries, while
others reap the awards.

He�s writing a report
for a symposium in Paris,

...while you, comrade Anikeeva,
take trips there to buy goodies.

And Guskov, instead of Paris, gets
send to Nizhniy Tagel.

He gets $2.60/day for going there.

And he got back-breaking arthritis there.

Guskov�s wife, calm donw.
Take your seat.

Regarding Paris, that decision
was made

in appropriate circles.

First of all, I am a PhD.

My works in hornitology have
been translated into French.

I so much wanted
Guskov to go.

So much! But...

Regarding goodies...

I spent all my money on
scientific books.

Really?

Then who imported the cassette player?

- Have you ever seen it?
- I did!

- Have you heard it?
-I did!

- Have you even turned it on?
- I did!

Have you no shame.

OK, that�s it...

Honest to God,
just like a child.

Be so kind,
hand me a copy of that list.

Fetisov,
Vitalii Kuzmich.

Comrade Fetisov made it on
this sorrowful list.

Are you for real?!
How can you expel me?!

I sold out the Motherland
for my car.

What?

What�s with you?

Nothing.

I request that the fact of selling out
the Motherland be placed in the minutes.

How much did they pay
you for that?

Did you get paid in rubles or in
convertible currency?

In rubles!

Got enough for the Zaparozhets model
and for this garage.

Why did you sell out so cheap?

I didn�t sell some dacha in
Moscow suburbs.

It was just a house in
a village.

A 2-story house on a 15-acre plot.

But the comforts in the garden
of that house...!

No one appreciates that.
Everyone�s become educated
nowadays

It�s 7.5 kilometers from the train station,
as you drag your shopping bags

But the view from the house
onto the river!

Purge the selling-out
part from the minutes.

My grandfather built that house.

And my father was born there.
And me.

When my mother died,
my wife kept pestering me:

Let�s sell! Let�s sell!

Who needs this piece of ruin?

Ruin.

There�s a barn in the garden,
iron-covered.

And what a cellar!

This lyrical departure needs
to come to an end.

Our river is still rich with fish!

Despite everything,
Despite all institutes

And I sold it. And the board
sold me out.

Look at him, the manager
of the insect department!

Chased too many butterflies.

See who has it good.

And the last name is...

Yakubov, Aleksandr Grigorievich.

As sad as it is.

I personally know comrade
Yakubov for a hundred years.

For 100 years we�ve known his
positive personality.

But nonetheless, someone
has to be expelled.

Khvostov, don�t strain your tendons.
It�s bad for you!

Where did this chatterbox
come from?

It�s in bad taste to speak that way!

Simon Aleksandrovich is our
best lab worker!

I�ll tell you everything in order!

You�re not a co-op member.
Sit down and relax!

Comrades! I want to go home!
I came here straight from the
marital court!

Let me go!

Khvostov works with the
fauna of the Northern Ocean.

And he loves our seal, Boris,
with gentleness.

When Boris fell ill, he jumped
into the icy pool

...so that the seal could
get its meds.

That�s how Khvostov caught a cold
and lost his voice.

A very touching story.

He is protesting loudly against
injustice!

Did I understand you correctly?

And so he nods, like a
depressed seal.

Comrades!

Shall we vote each one out,
or vote on the entire list?

Vote on the list. Let�s not
drag this out any longer.

Khvostov, go away!

You make too much noise,
go away from here!

Aleksandr Grigorievich!
We must put up a fight!

Useless. The overwhelming majority
is those who weren�t excluded.

And each of them will vote
against us.

No, it cannot be each!

And thus, we will vote on the whole list.

Wait!

Don�t raise your hands!
You won�t wash off from this
your whole lifetime.

Why are you so worried?
Maybe the assembly will vote against it.

Our co-op always agrees with the board.

Disagreeing with the board is
like spitting against the wind.

I beg you! Take pity on Guskov!

Every night someone steals
something from our car when
it�s parked outside.

-Comrades, who votes yes?
-Start voting!

I�m against! First let�s vote
those who are against!

Why are you showing two hands,
my sweet woman!

I�d also raise my both legs
if I could!

Guskov�s wife! Your behavior
is immoral.

I�ll leave only if escorted out
with a convoy!

I understand that this is a
very regrettable procedure.

But let�s have the vote.

You�re not managing this
very smoothly !

Shameful! Yes, shameful!
But we must vote!

Vote! Of course, vote!

With your permission, I need
to get something cleared up.

There�s some Miloserdov
in the shareholder list.

But we never accepted
him into our assembly!

How dare you refer to comrade
Miloserdov...

... as �some�!

I�m giving our respected board
a referral.

The board did indeed accept
into the co-op

...the son of comrade
Miloserdov.

We have no doubt that there
will be no objections...

...regarding that decision.

How can this be happening?

The boss�s son gets put in
through some connections!

Go away!

While I, an employee of this
institute, get the boot!

If I may. We are all like family here.

Let�s speak very frankly.

We accepted Miloserdev�s son
into the co-op,

... and the construction of the
garage started to move along
rather quickly.

Try to remember, how many
years we dilly-dallied!

Now you talk, as if this garage
is a shady business.

But my credo is to go
the legal route!

Going the legal route is dandy,
only it�s rather difficult.

Maybe you�ll disclosed the son
of our philanthropist to us?

Comrade Miloserdov Jr, do you
mind showing yourself?

No, I do not!

Such a cutie!

Where did you get that jacket?

In Singapour!

Rather far.

May I sit down again?

Thanks for your attention.

It�s not my fault that
I am his son.

One does not choose one�s parents,
but I am satisfied with mine.

-And what�s your name?
-Marina, only�

...do not say your name, I beg you

To me, you will remain �the son of
Miloserdov�.

In that is the romance
of our times.

I request your vote!
One, two...

Khvostov, go away!
You already spoke out!

Don�t meddle here!

What a disgrace...

Get off the presiding table
immediately!

He won�t get off!
He�s there as a symbol of protest!

Comrades!
My poultry is leaking!

Fine! Let him lie there
if he likes it that way

Let�s vote, comrades!

I won�t allow this vote!

I am a simple person, but
my money is the same!

Get away from here, your trumpet! Get!

I am not a trumpet! I am a
trombone! Got it?

I sold my house for this! That plot
had 12 apple trees!

Each one bore fruit!

I sacrificed all those Saturdays
for urban renewal!

I�ll show you!
You don�t know me at all!

Silence! Enough!

ATTENTION!

One tears up papers,
another lounges on the table,

...the third narrates about his
apple trees!

All candidatures for expulsion
have been confirmed.

What you�re doing is usurpation!

Only the assembly can decide
who does not belong!

Enough chatter! Are we gonna
stick around here till morning?

This is all so indecent!
Why do you keep silent?

Like they�ll ever listen to you!

Dad already took enough
stands in his life!

He took a lot of beating for it!

What�s been, has been.

Don�t start a fight here.
We�re already covered in blood.

I�m not!

Don�t I have the right to learn�

...who in our garage does not
work in our institute?

My golden man! Whatever goes on,
that right you do have.

Then disclose it.

Be so kind,
lift up your belly,

...I�ll take that list.

Oh get on with it.

You know that list by heart.

Fine.

��Fauna� cooperative, under the
umbrella of our institute:

First we didn�t have enough applications.

You know, people always take
their sweet time.

So we decided to accept a few people,

who don�t work here, but live not too far.

We have a wonderful brave corporal,

... here he is.

We have an important diplomat.

Me! I�m his proxy!
I�m his relative!

And an award-winning artist-
trombone player. He is in front of you.

We accepted them all
during a general assembly

...and cannot exclude them
on the basis of their not working

... in our institute.

These people took
the most active part.

Some strange memory you have.

You forgot to mention the generous
marketplace director.

What marketplace director?

- We didn�t accept no mark!
- Right!

-The horn blower was there!
-Trumbone player!

-We had the general!
- Corporal!

I remember the diplomat!
But no marketplace!

No, he was! If this psycho gets
off the table,

...I�ll show you the minutes.

You wrote him into the minutes later on.

Secrets don�t exist in
our times!

My dear man! How dare you
insinuate�

I dare! I dare!
I am not your dear man.

Wrap it up! I want to go home
to my bride!

She�s so�!
Wearing a white dress!

Right! You�re all in white,
while we...

Comrades! This board is
full of crooks

The marketplace director
bribed all of you!

You will answer for your
slander, Guskov�s wife!

And you�ll answer for the bribes,
comrade Anikeeva!

Hand over the market director!
I�ll chop him up into pieces

Please do!
Chop me up into pieces!

Do you know what you�ll pay
per kilo? Any idea?

I will tell you.

This part is the calf.

It�s worth no more than $3,
good only for a broth.

-Then...
-I know it!

You do not,
this is the rump!

It goes for $4/k.Good for soup
and for main course.

Further up you know,
is the buttox.

Everyone always has
fondness for the buttox.

So much meat and
sop few bones. It�s $ 5-6/k.

Like a shameless hussy.

You think if a person works
in sales,

they�re necessarily a thief
and take bribes?

What can she steal at the
marketplace?

It�s not a government store,
after all.

What can I steal?
The scales? The white gown?

The market opens at 7am.
She gets up at 6.

I get up at 4:30am, and
I work like I�m on a chain-gang.

Indeed, she looks like a convict.

For sure. The prison is awaiting her.

She wakes up at the crack of dawn,
so that you, Guskov�s wife,

..can buy fresh vegetables,
meat and fruits.

I cannot afford buying at
marketplace prices!

After all, I�m not a
member of the board!

No one gives me bribes!

Shut up, you hysterical woman!

And stop your filthy insinuations!

And don�t wave your hands
in my face!

How come you defend her so
passionately, huh?

It all looks rather fishy

I have no desire to
speak on this topic!

Why is that?

Comrades! I recommend we
toss the flee market director!

The board has prepared
for this assembly!

It sure did, at the market
among the tomatoes.

I could eat a small tomato now.

What does any of this have to
do with tomatoes? I don�t get it.

We heard enough of you,
lackey of the board.

Yes! I like our board!

I like the governance of our
institute, too !

I am against anarchy! I am for
order and discipline!

I represent the majority!
Everything works because of
people like me.

While all you care about is
your own self-interest!

Like, as long as I have my
own garage...

�and after me, the flood!

Actually, we will not have
our own garage!

This inclination toward private gain�

...bears no relation to
the common good!

Comrades!
Comrades.

I move to re-elect our board!

Right!

Move over! I�ll lie down next
to you in protest!

What lunacy!

A bigger storm is coming!

Are you the presiding officer,
or just a frozen fish?

Comrades!

Comrades, whoever�s in favor of
the board�s proposed list, I ask�

...that you raise your hand!

Stop it! Have you gone nuts
or something?

Who�s in favor of the list? I
call for a vote!

This is outrageous!

Just see how among those
who were not excluded,

...not one decent person
can be found.

-What about yourself?
-I don�t even have such a pretense.

-Who abstains?
-I abstain!

At least one that�s half-decent...

I do not wish to partake
in this disgrace.

Well, then, thank God.
With this motion, our assembly
is now adjourned.

I should have voted against
it, too.

I wouldn�t have felt so horrid.

Got scared. Two garages for
one family...

Whatever, don�t torment yourself.

Conscience isn�t in fashion
these days.

We, intellectuals, are prone
to commit some misdeeds�

...and then scorn ourselves
over them for a long, long time.

Just a moment, comrades!
No no, nothing scary!

Once again we must rob you all.

Please contribute $40 for
unforeseen expenses.

May we ask you to stand calmly?

Guskov�s wife, Khvostov!
Get off the table!

You are now non-members here!

Only co-op members can
lie down here.

Excellent!

The list. Where is the list?

Comrades! They stole all
our documents!

This is going overboard!
This is grounds for a law-suit!

Return the papers!
Your game is up.

Darling! What do you need
our documents for?

Oh, he didn�t steal the documents.
He swallowed them!

I lay next to him and watch
him chewing on them, down
to

...the last list.

Did you really eat everything?

Thanks.

As a veterinarian, I promise you,
my gluttonous one

...that you�ll have intestinal pains.

Yes, yes he�ll have intestinal pain!

As a protest!

I want some fresh air as soon
as possible.

Right! Your mere presence
pollutes

...the environment!

How can your husband
even stand you?

And you wear your diamonds
bought from the money you stole!

Would you just throw
this damn fish away!

I want to say a few words.
It�s very important.

Please let the person speak!

Have you lost it?
Enough of all these speeches!

Comrades! Wait!
We acted unjustly!

Do go home!
Your child�s been left alone!

Remember , you�re a mother
first and foremost!

Don�t try to gag her!

We will give you the floor! We�re
all gonna walk out of here�

...and then you can speak
for as long as you like!

Wonderful, leave!

I will say what I think anyway!

Tell it to the stuffed animals,
they�re ripe for it.

Comrades! Someone locked
the door!

Have you gone out of your mind?

It�s a stupid joke!
Open up!

This shameless act has most
likely been committed by

...one of those expelled.

Right! Right!
Out of protest!

We won�t let you
out alive!

Why didn�t I see it myself!

Assa!

Excluding you was clearly
the right decision!

Khvostov did it.
I can feel it, it was him.

Just look at his shifty eyes.

I have a radio recording at
10 am tomorrow!

Khvostov! Open the door
this very instance!

My wife is hom e sick!
She�s going out of her wits there!

Friends! Let me out!
It�s my wedding night!

-So what?
-What do you mean, so what?!

Comrades! Let�s break down
this door!

That won�t be easy.
It�s an old building.

Do you know what you�re
saying?

You will break down this door,
and who will guard �

...this priceless exhibit?

Our hippo is over
120 years old!

As the institute�s vice-president
I forbid you to do it!

My dear former members
of the cooperative!

I understand you and even
share your feelings.

But stop this usurpation and
return the keys!

Listen up, since we are locked
in anyway...

Allow me to give a speech!

Give it at your home
as much as you like.

Oh please! Come clean,
who committed�

�this villainy, oh
my silver ones!

Well, I locked it. Me!

Does that make it easier?

The little one�s got strength.

Do you comprehend what
you are saying, or not?

I locked the door!

She�s blowing smoke, just relax!

Why did you do it?

You were not excluded, after all�

You, I�m afraid, will
never understand that!

The ham already turned green!

Comrades! Let�s forcefully
take the keys from her!

Certainly!

What are you going to do,
pat down a woman?

Why? I can be the one to do it!

What a character, no shame
and no conscience.

Please don�t!
Don�t waste your efforts!

I can undress myself
Without external assistance.

My only fear is that it will
displease those present here.

Now that�s for sure.

Give back the keys, snake!

Comrades, I am not so foolish
as to keep

...the keys on my person
in such distinguised

...company as yourselves.

I hid them in a reliable place.

I don�t believe her.

We�ll have to search her
after all.

Lydia Vladimirovna!
Are you out of your mind?

That�s fine� Let them commence
this �Jail Shakedown!

What a nightmare!

- Shakedown!
- Oh my God!

Comrades, you have no right
to act like vigilantes!

We can only do it with
assembly�s permission.

Comrades! Who votes in favor
of having me searched?

Come on!
Don�t chicken out now, comrades!

I�m in favor!

I�m against!

I�ll vote for anything,

...just let me out of here!

He�s got a sick wife at home,
and I have a healthy young bride!

You don�t get it, I�ve got a
radio recording tomorrow!

If I don�t get enough sleep,
I�ll sing with such falsetto...

No other choice.

I always wake up at the crack
of dawn at 4:30.

A pat-down search is an
unfortunate necessity, comrades.

What sacrifices won�t we make
to return folks to their families.

I ask to enter into the minutes
that I am protesting!

We will note that you are protesting,
but we have nowhere to

...write it down. The minutes
were eaten.

Well, comrades! Who will
do my pat down?

We�ll have a strip-tease now!

We�ll start with your purse!

Alla Alekseevna!
Check her overcoat!

What a pity!
We have no photographer on hand!

Comrades! I lack experience in this,
I don�t know how!

It only seems hard at the start.

No key here!

Don�t be shy, step right up.

Oh, that tickles!

I won�t allow this!

Did you see?
He hit me!

Can�t you see that
the only way to

...avoid a fistfight is to

...give me the floor.

What floor? Lord!
Where�s the key?

Where�s the key,
my lousy one?

Maybe she�s mentally ill,
like Khvostov?

That one gulped the paperwork down,
and this one swallowed the key?

No, that key is humongous.
She would have choked on it.

We must yield to the strongest one!
Alright, speak up.

So, you are giving me the floor?

Oh, just let her drivel on
about whatever she wants!

By the way, is there a phone here.
I really need it.

No, there isn�t.

Why are we afraid of this goose?
Let her quack!

Only be brief!

We now commence part two
of our multi-part assembly.

Comrade Malaeva has the floor,

...only speak briefly and
don�t stretch it out.

First let out only me.
My bride is waiting!

I empathize with your
impatience, but,

...If I let you out, everyone
will rush out too.

Comrade groom! You commited
the crudest error.

First you should have finalized
your business with the bride,

...and only then attend
the assembly.

You made me lose count!

Go!

Comrades!
We work at an institute which

...deals with protection
of animals.

A human being is also
an animal.

It also must be protected!

From who?

Humans must be protected
from other humans.

From the greed that�s
consuming us all

From the desire to conquer,
to acquire more.

Comrades! Our behavior has
been very low.

And that�s to put it mildly.
We are scoundrels.

Here we go. She started her
moral lecture.

Just think,
not one person

of those left untouched,
and there are 28 of us here,

not one spoke out against
the board�s foul character

The board chose for its victims
the most defenseless people.

We�re not talking of a
life-threatening danger,

nor of freedom!

Nor of our children, nor of work!

This is about a box to keep
a hunk of metal in!

That metal costs $6-7K!

Maybe yours does, mine is cheaper.

Let�s live by democratic principles.

And for that we must start
everything from scratch.

Yeah. Perfect timing at 1 at night.

Turns out, white crows haven�t
become extinct yet

It�s a big rarity in nature,
but we have them.

Fortunately � you do.

We must discuss each
shareholder separately.

We must vote on each one
and see by the full vote counts

...who gets no approval.

My sweet sparrow,
my little one,

We�ll need several weeks to do that.

A year, if we must.

When it comes to truth,
time is no object.

Quit blowing it, my musical one!

It�s unnerving, how you�re
blowing it through the night.

If you�re so principled,
then give up your own garage!

If the assembly puts me out,
I will not complain.

You have a hungry child at home
and look at you...

It�s my kid. If I want to I�ll feed
him; if I want to�not!

See, she�s like that in her
family too...

So you crossed out Aleksandr
Grigorievich.

He just retired and so,
you wrote this person off.

But the fact that he slaved in our
institute like a donkey for 30 years.

�worked here...�

That he went through the whole world
war as a reconnaissance man

Earned 2 medals of Glory.

Has a medal for conquering Berlin.

None of that has any significance?

-Or let�s take Guskov.
-Guskov!

Let�s take Guskov!

Pardon me.

The board knew nothing about
comrade Yakubov�s
military achievements.

Why haven�t you told us
any of this?

What does this stuff
from the past have to do

...with obtaining a garage?

How can you say that?

This is a terrible error in
judgement on our part!

You should have reviewed
each person�s file.

Thank you, comrade Malaeva,
thank you.

??????????.

Only now I understood how
right you were in

...locking the door.

We have commited the gravest
political error.

But how do you intend
to correct all this?

Certainly, we will restore
your name to the list.

Evidently, at the expense
of someone else.

I vote YES!

I vote NO!

So what will happen to us?

Whom exactly are you planning
to throw out of the list?

Comrades! The board has reached
a dead end.

I call for a short break.

We�ll break now, comrades.
We go on break!

I don�t understand what is
happening here?

This little booger leaped out
of nowhere�.

...and now we all have to
make adjustments?

Give our garages away to
one another? No!

Son of a gun!

We had heard and read
plenty about stuff like this...

I am against!

We�re all fighting for a sunny
spot here!

For a garage.
What is there to hide?

This garage is the sunny spot
in the south--Sochi!

Break!

So am I restored or not?

Your car is practically inside the
garage now. Count on it.

Well, thanks.
Better late than never.

What a life, huh?
Everyone basking in their own happiness.

Who is this pewit,
who created all this chaos?

???. Junior scientific personnel.

A PhD candidate.

A poisonous �snake specialist.

She learned a lot from them.

Or the snakes from her.

If a woman has such
physical features and fights

for truth, she�s clearly not
married.

You guessed it!

Did the husband leave her
a while ago?

There never was a husband.

How? She�s got a child.

There are kind people
in this world...

I don�t like rumors, but
used to tell in our institute that�

Oh, how horrible.

Men used to pay women for it,
but nowadays...

What a degradation of morals.

Elena Pavlovna, I�m an expert
in all things auto.

Any maintenance, any repair.

I know. You�re a great national
handyman.

So I�ll do anything for you.

For free, of course.

Thank you.

I�ll turn your shabby little �Moskvich�
into a Mercedes!

Thank you, but my speech
won�t change anything.

? ??? ??? ???????????.

Oh, why won�t you marry me?

What are you missing
out on anyway?

We vacation together.

Go to the theater together.
And to the movies.

You want the status of a
professor�s wife?

I�m sick of being a lover.

It�s humiliating.

That�s a hypocritical viewpoint.

Call me a hypocrit.

But I am so much older than you...

Let�s not count by how much

-Say, is there an exit that way?
-No, there�s a dead end.

I�ll be a totally old man in
just a few years.

While you will still be a strong
young woman

You�ll start tormenting me
for every trifle.

You�re blabbering such nonsense,
I won�t even consider it.

I love you.

And want to marry you.

I�m totally stuck on that.

Who�s there?

Let us out! Open up, for God�s sake!

Call comrade Anikeeva here

I�m her husband.

Petr Petrovich, is it you?

Lydia baby, it�s me.

Petr Petrovich, rescue us.

Lydia baby, there�s a crowd of
relatives downstairs. They�re
all going psycho there.

What�s happening in there?

See, this one brain-damaged
woman locked us in here

So we are having a closed, that is�
locked-in session.

The guard let me in because
he knows me.

???????! ? ??????? ????
???????? ?????!

?? ?? ??????.

Your guard is an idiot!

Yes, but he is on duty.

Why is everything left up
to some security guard?

Would you cut it out.

Tell him that I order him
to hand over the key!

Useless, he responds only
to the chief of security.

Lydia baby, little Sasha won�t
fall asleep.

He demands his grandma.

Make something up.
Say that grandma�

...flew away on a magic carpet.

Can you please be quiet!

Think of something!
You hear me?

What should I tell all those
relatives?

Tell them they can all
go home.

After all, this session will
eventually come to an end.

I�m about to start yelling!

Don�t yell, sweety.
Eventually everything does end.

What a romantic night!

I feel as though you and I are
in a jungle.

-Surrounded by wild beasts and savages.
-Yes.

Do you hear? An elephant trumpeting!

It�s probably his mating season,
just like our groom here.

By the way, you and I could get
devoured here.

Any minute.

Let�s at least get to know each
other, before our death.

I can tell everything about you.

You have a degree in foreign
relations.

You flatter me.

OK, in foreign languages.

Missed again.

Cinematography then...

Your take is too predictable:
�Since he�s Miloserdov�s son�

��then it must be something
fashionable.�

Are you really a carpenter?

No. Now that�s going too far.

I�m an archaologist. Present
times don�t interest me much

I prefer to dig in the past

And you, professor�s daughter.
What are you?

Mine is all standard stuff.

All within the norm.

I have a philology degree
from Moscow State U.

It�s the �bride major� you know?

My work is in satire.

Russian or foreign?

Russian

-19th century?
-No, modern.

Your job is amazing. You are
working on something that�

...does not exist.

You know, you�re kinda fun

Let me out of here, you
barbarians!

Have some compassion!

Why are you so fussy?

You�re not a little boy!

How many times have you
been married already?

It�s my first!

Comrade Malaeva, may I have
a minute with you?

Excuse me, comrades!

-Why are you so anxious?
-It�s not that.

You see, I�ve been after her
for 17 years.

Oh yeah? How old are you now?

Pretty old�

I�m in love with her since 9th grade.

She married twice. I kept waiting.

And now I made it.

You understand? I beg you
on my knees.

Stop that, please.

I�ll let you out.

OK, got it. I got it.

Go to the doors and wait there.

And how will you deal with
the carburetor?

Magnificently.

Gotcha!

Sorry, wasn�t meant to be!

Give me the key!
I mean it!

Comrades! Give me the key!

While I am running around here,
she�ll marry another man!

I know her!

We hid the key in another place now!

What? Ouch!

Comrades!
It�s late into the night now!

We really want to sleep!

Let�s move our assembly to
a different day.

I second that.

Everyone�s tired. Nobody�s
head is working now

Let�s sleep on it.
I move to�

Lie down and sleep!

What do you mean, sleep?

Sleep where?

Right here, of course.

On the floor, on the table.

And continue in the morning,
when we are fresh...

She�s simply mocking us!

I�m gonna hit you with
a trombone!

I will...

I will kill you!

Touch her with one finger,

...and I will break all your ribs.

Excuse me.
Allow me, please.

You made a mistake. You stand
in the wrong place.

I am right where I need to be.

I�ll also stand where I need to be.

Good people! Let us disperse!

We will re-convene

If we open the door now,
you will not...

...call for a new assembly.

We won�t give you the keys!

My people, you are all dear to me

... good!

I won�t stand for any
blood spilled here!

Off to sleep we go, comrades!
Sleep!

Oh I miss my bed and blankies.

We�ll bring the pillow now.

Don�t touch it. It�s the macaque of
Sumatransky!

It�s the only copy of it in the
entire country!

Good night, kids!
Tuck yourselves in!

You�re the presiding officer,
have you lost your mind?

You want to commit everyone
to collective sleep?

You wish to sleep standing up,
like a fighting horse?

I curse the day I bought my car!

I curse the day I joined the co-op.

I curse this damn garage!

I curse this damn assembly!

Comrade! I don�t want to sleep
alone, and I won�t!

I�ll throw myself out the window!

Where? It�s too high here.
You will die!

Comrades!
Comrades!

The board is towing the line of
some schitzophrenic woman!

What is this�sleep?!

-Well, sleep! Sleep!
-We�ll sleep over here!

Don�t touch the goat!

Fetisov! Leave the argali alone

Hey, diplomat�s relative, where are
you dragging the ant-eater?

Put it back!
What are you doing?

We have to protect animals,
not the other way around!

Jerk! Move away!

Lena, dear come here.
I saved a spot here for you

Pervert!
Crawled up on me...

I have a wife at home!

All my food�s gone bad.

You�re quite a louse!

What, have you all lost it?

Hey, half-man. Before I got to
sleep, sign a paper for me

What paper, oh my fishmarket girl?

Here�s a paper and a pen. Write

-Write what?
-Write, I will dictate.

This reference is given to citizen
Kushakova, A. A.

...that she spent the night in
a zoological museum

...at the assembly of
co-operative Fauna.

Address to whom?

My husband.
He�s a jealous man.

Witnessed by 29 people.

Witness to what?

Sign and stamp it, pervert!

How�s life with the husband?

Like a festivity to my heart!

She has the stamp.

My loyal one.

Slap the stamp on this.

Since we�re dozing off,
can we shut off the lights?

Don�t know where the switch is...

I�m afraid of the dark

Karapuhin, is that you snoring?

You watch yourself there.

What�s your research, grad student?

Your dissertation topic is
pseudoscientific.

You�re a typical pseudoscientist.

Studying your silver stork.

While he nests only abroad
and visits our land in passing.

This stork in the sky is not
even our native bird.

Dear Karapuhin,
the silver stork is

an ignorant bird. It doesn�t read
newspapers and thus

...has no conceptions of whether
it�s our native bird or not.

�Dark Night...I know my dear,
you are not yet asleep�

Heaven forbid!
Stop that now!

One 7-year old boy wrote
a verse:

�Camels have their two big humps
Because life�s a road with bumps.�

�Sleep, oh my joy, go to sleep...�

�Lights have gone out in the house��

�Birds are asleep in their trees��

�Fish are asleep in their pond��

�Mice are asleep in the wall��

�Sleep, oh my joy, go to sleep.�

Sleep, oh my joy, go to sleep.

Comrades, I disagree with
Malaeva.

How to determine who�s better
and who�s worse. By what
yardstick?

Everyone paid, and everyone
has an equal right.

You know, I offer to draw
lots from a hat.

Drawing lots is not our method
This is not a game of cards!

And the lots will be drawn by
everyone, including board members

Right!
Draw lots!

Right! Let the board also
draw from it!

Yes, if drawing lots, then
everyone�s in!

As I can gather, my half-asleep ones,

...the assembly is continuing
spontaneously.

Very well. Let�s resume the debates!

Much respected Pavel
Konstantinovich!

You are a distinguished scientist
with worldwide renown

Everyone in this institute
depends on you, except me.

I�m just a veterenarian

Even if you become an academician

...animals won�t stop falling
ill because of that

They have to be treated.

Which is why, my priceless one,
I will tell you the whole truth.

You have two garages for
one family.

So be it. We will try our luck
just like everyone else.

Yes, but the board has an
advantage.

My commercial one,
the board has discredited itself.

I have deep respect for you
as a scientist,

...but your moral image...

As a vice-president of the
institute, I got a call from a

...powerful organization.

People were buying potatoes in
cardboard packages at a grocery store�

and what did they find there?

Not pine apples, I presume?

Don�t joke, boy. Don�t joke.

They found in them the professor�s
business card with

address and credentials.

What is this ridiculous act?

Who sent you to the vegetable farm?

All my colleagues were sent there.

And I found it impossible
not to go along with them.

And I am used to honest labor.

And if for my salary of $500,
I find myself packaging potatoes,

...then I am responsible for each
single potato going into it

Did any complaints about quality arise?

Didn�t seem to.

When you buy a box of candy
There�s always a paper there

�Packer #2�

At the vegetable farm, neither I
nor other PhDs received

...any packer-numbers there.

And so I was forced to put my

...business card into each package.

I am in awe at your principles.

Today at the assembly you
really showed them off:

First, you�re for the board.
Then you�re against.

There I thought you were a
big-shot scientist

...and you�re a petty profiteer.

Yes, Sidorin, I am after property...

Not sure what sort of a
scientist I am,

...but it�s most disappointing that
I am such a coward.

It seems, what have I got
to fear?

But in my youth I got a lot
of beating,

...for things for which later I
got awards

...and monetary reward.

But they scared me for the rest
of my life.

I am very old now.

It�s time to stop being afraid.

Save your worthless confession,
my dear one.

You�re chattering away about it
only so as to

...save your second garage.

How dare you speak that way
with

...Pavel Konstantinovich?

I dare everything, girl.

Pavel Konstantinovich has a
pure, selfless soul!

He could care less about all
your garages.

While you all�
All of you...

You�re all animalistic philistines!

A sleazy lover is giving us a
moral lecture here!

I didn�t think that I had to
report to the

...garage cooperative

...about my personal life.

My Natasha

...isn�t my lover, but

...my wife!

Apologize to her, Karapuhin!

This very instance.

Do forgive me, please.

I didn�t know you were his wife.

See the wonders of biology!

Mommy and daughter sat
at the same desk in school.

Congrats, mommy!

Got what you wanted. Caught
yourself a rich, famous fish.

You are shameless, dear daughter.

-I simply love him.
-Love him, oh yeah, you love him.

Everyone loves the rich and
famous ones.

Should I stop loving him for that?

Girls, don�t fight.

Sleep, oh my dear, do sleep...

Where are you dear, do sleep...

Here I now sit and I sing...

Sleep, oh my dear, do sleep...

Yes, Karapuhin,

...you are a monster.

Alright, enough.

I don�t even understand, why do
you need a garage in Moscow?

Where should it be?

Why, in Siberia of course!

You�re planning to populate your
miserable monkeys

...in the Siberian taiga.

What a load of crap?
The monkeys will freeze over in that place!

An amateurish point of view!

I do my research into cultivating a
special breed of monkeys.

Ones that can endure the frost!

Good God, what strange apparitions
do visit us in our sleep?

But what for?
Who needs that?

What?!

It holds great significance for our
national economy

Is that so?

Enough of your creative diggings.

Monkeys harvest coconuts in India.

And mine will gather pine nuts
in the Taiga

...gather them, shell them, and
package them in boxes!

And label them, too.

Oh no, we won�t allow the
monkeys to do

...any kind of labeling.

But you yourself have give
good remarks about

...my work.

It proves my lapse in judgement again.

No, it proves your set of principles!

Comrades! I move
to exclude Karapuhin!

Do you now.
For what?

He needs his garage somewhere
between Omsk and Khabarovsk.

He will drive his cars across
the taiga there

and verify that his macaques are
fulfilling the quarterly plan.

In that case, you need your
garage in a desert, among snakes.

You�ll have an easier time
retrieving your poison there.

Why, you Lilliput!

Please turn on the light!

�Hey, apple where do you roll�

Fall in my mouth and never go back!�

What does this mean?

What will you show us?

She�ll show you everything!

We won�t let you show anything!

We�ll show you everything ourselves!

Comrades, it�s already dawn.

It�s time to make some decisionsc.

This imbecile is standing
with a sign.

What are you hanging around
here for?

Shame on you. Watch how you talk.

- He cannot answer you!
- He is �voiceless�!

Sorry, everyone�s become wicked
and blabbers on all kinds of stuff.

I must admit, this wasn�t the best
night of my life.

I surrender my position and
agree to drawing lots.

I do hope you will spare the board.

But how much we�ve done for
you people! My God!

Walked from office to office.
Begged powerful people.

How many humiliations we�ve
endured. How many nerves!

When there was no cement,
we took the whole brigade�

...to see �Gizelle� at the Bolshoi.

Luckily, the orchestra directors
doggy at that time was sick with

...ringworm.

We even broke the law for
you on occasion.

Bribed some with $10 here,
with French perfume there

...some�with candy.
And all for the common good!

Marina, when this show is over

...let�s have breakfast at my place.

I�ve never been asked out to
breakfast before.

Out to supper is more common.

Consider it innovation.

I know I give an impression of
a woman,

...with whom one can strike up
over supper,

...over dinner, or even
over breakfast.

But now you will tell me that
you�re not the type?

No, I won�t say that.

But I won�t go for the
breakfast either.

I did plenty of breakfasting in my day.

Aren�t you wrapping it up too early?

My last husband ruined my appetite

...for any time of day.

Marina...

I am ready to go on a hunger
strike for your sake.

Enough useless chatter.
Let�s draw the lots!

Alright, let�s play this lottery.

But first let�s get rid of the
people who are �hooked up�.

First, I dare say, from Miloserdov�s son.

Alright, now they gave it to my
daddy for nothing.

...and from the marketplace
director.

Why, you little feisty progressive.
How much did you pay the man

...to create that baby for you?

It was a brave little guy, wasn�t it!

Now you�re really going overboard!

Be so kind as to give me that sign.

Please get out of here!

I would, but it�s locked.

First you gave me a pat-down,
and now let�s climb

...into my bed.

I have no husband.

Never was and probably never will be.

And as for my child...

I�ll get another one if
I feel like it.

Husbands are expendable
nowadays.

For a woman, her children
are the main thing.

Do you know how many
there are like me?

And I am happy.

And my boy is happy.

And regarding the money
I paid, I don�t know�

how your tongue could turn
to spew out something like that?!

You wanted to insult me
but only insulted yourself.

Comrades! My current research
is about

...animal behavior in circumstances
of high danger.

And my dear, animals do not

...destroy their own kind.

Oh enough, just lay off.

Don�t fret.

A tiger won�t eat a tiger,
and a bear won�t touch a bear,

...and a rabbit does not kill a rabbit.

If a wounded whale cannot

come up for air

..other whales swim under him

...and carry him to the top.

Comrades, can�t you see that
we are drowining one another!

Dammit!

I�ve kept silent on and on,

...but really, they bought me out
by taking me back in.

I melted.

And I betrayed

...all my comrades in misery.

Just to think what�s
become of me!

Would I ever allow this
at the front with the Germans?

I feared nothing there.

And here because of a lousy garage...

There�s this overused phrase:

"I wouldn�t cross into enemy
lines with this man".

So today, I wouldn�t cross into
enemy lines with myself.

�At a boy!
Aleksandr Grigor�evich,

I started respecting you again.

Comrades, I concur with the
general opinion that

...we must first toss out the
�hooked up� people.

But I disagree with the
definition.

They are not �hooked up� people.
They are useful people.

What is Kushakova?
Not just a marketplace director.

Kushakova equals cement
and iron gates

Kushakova equals bulldozer.

What is Miloserdov�s son

Should we bother explaining
that to you, comrades?

But what is a favor worth,
once it�s been done?

Should we expel them?

Then let�s at least declare our official
gratitude to these people.

Gee, thanks for that!

I�ll take your gratitude

...to the grave with me.

Fine and good, comrade Anikeeva.
You and I will

...settle our score another time.

I have nothing to settle with you.

Really, nothing?

How about when you supposedly
lacked the money to

...purchase those �Zhiguli� cars
and you �borrowed� from me

...$1500.

What nastiness!

What disgusting and
cheap vengeance!

Apparently, not so cheap.
Too bad I took no receipt from you.

My God!

Well, what?

Slanderer!

So what then?
Bye bye to my money?

Don�t worry, pretty face,
you�ll earn it back real soon.

Some values you have in this
science cooperative!

Worse than at the flea market,
my honest word!

You won�t be laughing at the trial,
my sweet one!

Did Anikeeva really take
a bribe?

Without any doubt!

Come on, an academician wouldn�t
dirty themselves for money.

Good.

So then, Kushakova,
Miloserdov�s son...

And third � Smirnov�s daughter,

...one garage for one family
is plenty.

What, me?

So I am left without a garage
after all!

I did warn you, why did you
stick your neck out?

Actually, I am least bothered.

You gifted a car to me, so
be consistent then.

I�ll be parking it in your garage.

You�re a newly-wed.

And with your beloved, it�s
paradise even without a garage.

Nothing will work out for you,
my little one.

I�ll lie down in front of the garage.

You won�t dare ride over
your own old man.

Who, this one?! She�ll ride
over anybody.

And the fourth is...

Guskov!

How Guskov?

Again Guskov?

Why Guskov?

Well, somebody has to be 4th.

Anikeeva�s motion is good.

Alright, so, two �hooked-up,�
the professor�s daughter�

...and, who�s the 4th there?

- Guskov!
- Right, Guskov!

He�ll do! Done!

Tolya! What was your geography
grade at school today?

Why are your jeans
torn up again,

Did you get into a fight?

Have you lost it?
I am no Tolya to you

Tolya, don�t be rude to mama!

Lyuba, my dear girl!
Again you didn�t finish eating
your kasha.

You must eat oatmeal at your age,

...so that your liver grows healthy.

Stop this comedy, Guskov�s wife.

My restless one,
stop pranking us.

Guskov, I am asking you
for the last time,

Why did you come home
after 11pm last night?

Just don�t lie that you
had a meeting at work.

We have two children.

Did you start up an affair?

Aren�t you ashamed?

Why won�t you say anything?

Have you nothing to say to me?

My God.
She�s gone off the rails.

I know that after taking care
of our children

...I am not the cutie that I
was before.

But it�s not my fault!

But these are your children!

Our children!

Tolya, when will you finish
doing your homework?

A horrific thing.

Look how a person
can be driven over the edge.

My reasonable one...

I have no one but you,
and you alone.

Never did and never will.

I love you

...only you.

Please, calm yourself.

Please, don�t be stressed out.

All will be well.

Tolya, go do your
geography homework.

Tolya, don�t upset
your mommy.

-Are you serious.
-Or else we�ll give it to you.

Very well.
Daddies.

And you, Lyuda,
eat your kasha!

Mommy, oatmeal is my
favorite kasha.

Guskov, Lyuda�s coat is
all worn out,

while all the girls dress so
fashionable these days.

Oh God, what happened
to me?

I feel so cold.

Thanks.

You�ll be fine.

You�re under protection here.

Want me to play something
nice for you?

Go ahead!

Excuse me please.

Excuse me, comrades.

People!
Humans!

Put your heads together! It�s morning!
The way we�re going,

we will all lose it soon!

He can talk...

Science fiction!

The mute began to talk.

My voice came back after
seeing all this nightmare.

Let�s vote on 3 points at once.

First: send all those �hooked-up�
to the devil!

I eulogize my garage now.

Second: re-elect the board.

We�re being overthrown,
it seems.

And third:

Let�s draw that lot.

We vote on all three together.
Who�s in favor?

Right!
Good job, groom!

Nothing doing, I am
with the majority.

Right. Who�s opposed?

Overwhelming minority.

Let�s cut up 30 papers, and
on 2 of them,

...2 unlucky ones, put an �X�
.

Alright, but we will do so
without you,

...our multi-faced one.

Who will volunteer their hat for it?

Me!

- I will!
- Thanks.

* loud door knocking *

Open up! Open up right now!

Oh God! Did something happen
to my grandchild?

Wait!

Hold on!

Lydia-baby!

What? What happened?

While you are convening here,
our car got stolen.

I thought it was little Sasha.
Got a fright!

- Did you call the cops?
- I did!

Comrades!

As we now have a person
in no possession of a vehicle,

...she cannot be a co-op member,

...comrade Anikeeva is
automatically removed.

Just one paper needs to be
marked with an �X�.

What beauty!
Sold me out, did you?

My unbribable one, to betray in
the right time is not to betray,

...but to forsee!

No need to rush!
The car can be found!

As soon as it�s found,
we will instantly restore

...comrade Anikeeva to our
reserve list.

How ugly all this is!

That�s fine. Tomorrow we will
chat in another place.

Why are you attacking me?

Law is law. I didn�t write it.

I am marking one paper in
everyone�s plain sight.

Now you�ll all witness that this
sole, unlucky paper

...will be drawn just by me.

We begine the drawing!

Who�s first?

Let me be first.

I have a good excuse.

Let go. You will regret this yet.

I�ll make sure the freeway goes

...right through ?our land plot.

And we�ll knock down your garages
as spoiling urban view.

And buses will cross this spot.

Thank you.

Empty! Empty!

I�m clean.

Right! Truth is always on our side!

I�m scared.

Draw just one paper please!
Just one!

Who drew the �X�?

Not me, comrades.

Clean!

Comrades! There�s just one
paper left

Still, there�s someone who
hasn�t drawn!

Draw your lot.

Pull out the paper,
our fortunate one.

Subtitles: Omroot.